Hello and welcome back Shark. Here is to another episode of
Deep Dives with sharks. My name is Alex, and sometimes I
wish I was born a whale shark because, you know, probably be a
really chill life, just slow swimming and eating plankton.
Anyway, this was supposed to be out on Friday and 2025 decided
that it had a bunch of tricks up its sleeve, so it's coming out
on Monday instead, which is not as late as it could have been.
I was on track and then I had a slew of things happen and here
we are. I appreciate the kind words and
those who checked on me in the Discord and I'm hoping that
things are only up from here. Which Speaking of things
trending up, we did hit 2000 followers on Spotify.
Woohoo. I am so amazed that we got to
2000 shark years, especially in the winter when numbers tend to
slow up. But you all have been sharing
and growing the numbers and I can't thank you guys enough.
I also did start a YouTube just before the last episode so you
can find almost all the episodes there.
I'm not sure why episode 8 didn't upload and why it
refuses, but if it's there that's very exciting and if not
we'll keep fighting with it. That will also be deep dives
with sharks. Plus I have stream logs there so
you can catch up after if you want to see what I did on
stream, which I also do stream on Twitch under the same name,
Deep Dives with sharks. So you can follow along anywhere
really, including Instagram to be caught on all the sharky
goodness. I did try to consolidate
everything to make it all the same thing.
So pretty much wherever you search deep dives with Sharks,
you should see me. If it doesn't have the logo and
stuff, I'll try to make sure that I keep track of that so
that way people don't start getting scanned by nothing.
I'm not going to ask you for for money and such, so don't give me
your credit card information. That's not a good idea.
But anyway, I was supposed to do like a regular episode this
week, but then a lot happened. I had friends coming by as well.
So life kind of threw some curveballs.
I had friends coming by and kind of got away from me.
And I realized on like Wednesday night that I didn't have any
research done. So quick Audible, I watched
Sharknado, which I made it 12 years without watching that or
the subsequent films. But this is where that ends.
I do this because I love the shark heroes, otherwise I'd
probably have gone my whole life without watching that movie.
So here we are. But Sharknado originally came
out in 2013. It was directed by Anthony C
Ferrante and it stars Tara Reid and Ziering and John Hurd, who I
saw then. The film has evidently passed
away, so may he rest in peace now.
It is classified as a comedy end of the world thriller, which I
was picturing Zombieland or This is the End for examples and my
expectations were sort of high towards the beginning.
I probably thought it was strictly a horror movie.
I think they changed it to comedy to kind of save face I
guess because oh boy. Anyway, I watched the 10th year
anniversary edition because I can't find the original anywhere
unless I pay for it, which I already paid for Amazon Prime,
so I'm using the version that they got.
The movie starts in a wild way that is already weird.
You can see dozens of sharks swimming away from a tornado
that has already sucked up hundreds of sharks.
So off RIP. We throw in science in the trash
and gone weird with it, which sounds familiar.
Sharks tend to not get sucked up by hurricanes and often run off
if a pressure system that will cause tornadoes rolls into the
area. So I guess the swimming away
makes the most sense of all this, but oy vey, it's going to
be a long watch ahead. They show the bad guys fitting
sharks pretty early, so great work on making me dislike them
immediately. I already run into Punch Captain
Santiago 3 1/2 minutes into the movie and I wrote this thinking
that they would come back, but they all get eaten by sharks.
So I mean, I guess very fitting end for them.
Now a storm does come out of nowhere.
And I mean, there were blue skies and sun and then all of a
sudden there's 50 foot waves, Thunder and lightning in the
Gulf of Mexico and Florida gets afternoon thunderstorms in the
summer That can come pretty quick.
But this is a huge step from what actually happens.
Not to mention random sharks throwing themselves on board to
eat the crew, which if you're going to fin sharks in the Gulf,
I I mean, I guess you get eaten that I don't make the rules.
I just watch the movies. That makes sense.
Now, sharks may end up on a boat for a variety of reasons, such
as trying to get rid of a hook. They're going for prey and
mistiming the breach landing on the deck, which is much less
common but possible. Or there's a bird or something
on the side of the boat. Or a fish that was recently
caught and they're trying to get it and they end up somehow on
board, but for the most part, doesn't really happen.
But in the scene, you'll have five that just jump on board
because why not? Now?
They were big sharks as well. Looked like they were trying to
go for hammer heads, great whites and tigers.
And that'd be hundreds if not thousands of extra pounds added
to the boat. And the boat just kind of ate
that. Like it was fine.
It didn't sway or anything. It just hit the thing and then
that was it. So I mean, that was just kind of
a boat critique, which I mean, apparently I do it all around
here. Who knew?
No, the movie pivots to a hurricane threatening
California, which they were just in the Gulf of Mexico.
I don't understand why they suddenly are now in California
but here we are now. A hurricane threatening
California is possible but highly unlikely.
Only two have hit California and both were tropical storms, at
least according to my research. But both the bartender girl, who
I find out later is named Nova, and the bar regular who I
believe is named George, they wish the storm would kill
sharks, which would only be very detrimental for the environment.
So I'm going to have to disagree on that one.
Now, once we cut to the beach, the surfers are on the calmest
ocean ever. And despite being practice
surfers, they're freaking out about sharks.
They're talking smack to each other about how they're going to
catch this wave when there's no wave coming.
It's very much things that surfers don't tend to be or do.
They also don't notice a giant hurricane coming towards them.
And the Hurricanes don't just pop up out of nowhere.
I mean, there's lots of warnings about it.
You wouldn't just hear, Oh no, a hurricane formed in the Gulf 5
minutes ago Run. They tend to warn you weeks in
advance or as far in advance as they can, which tends to be
usually about like a week and a half before it hits.
So that's just, I mean, being in Florida and seeing that, I was
like, dear God. Now the first bite scene is
wild. There's a lot of flailing, which
is definitely possible. Of course, if you get bit,
you're going to be shocked. You're going to be waving for
help. So that is totally possible
there. But they had three sharks coming
after her, which wouldn't happen.
Plus they had a hammerhead, which is possible but highly
unlikely to spend time around California.
They're usually found in the Gulf of California, which is in
Mexico. So it's just one of those things
that doesn't really make a lot of sense.
Like you'll see some hammer heads, but for the most part,
not really. The last sighting was in 2023
and before then was 2005. So they're few and far between,
but evidently do this movie. They're going to get some hammer
heads over there now. Old timer surfer dude, which we
found out his name is Baz. I was taking these notes as I
watched clearly but he decides it's best to yell sharks towards
the beach. Definitely not going to cause
panic but also even though he is well within earshot because in
later shots they're like 5 inches from the beach.
Everyone's deaf they just don't hear the guy and also no one
moves. And a person standing in ankle
deep water gets bit which great whites aren't going to come into
ankle deep water. Neither are tiger sharks.
But the hammerheads might they, they tend to go after prey a lot
closer to shore, but they also have really far set back mouths.
Far back set mouths. There we go.
That's the best way to put that. So they're not really going to
come in and bite you like that. You'll also be able to see him
coming if you're an angle deep water.
But no, that's one of our first deaths.
Now the lifeguards of course, see this this bite happening and
are are freaking out as well. So they decide they're going to
run over and you start yelling shark, clear the beach, everyone
get off the beach into a megaphone.
Why? That's just going to cause so
much panic. No lifeguard in their right mind
is going to go, Oh my God, everyone get out of the water.
It's horrible. They're all going to be like,
hey, everyone do the this way, please, as orderly, please
calmly as he can just get off the beach real fast.
Like things like that. They're not going to be like
Sprint, like everyone's going to be fine.
My God, that one really messed me up now.
Bartender girl once again Nova straight up shoved a cop on her
way to the beach to make sure that everyone's OK.
That straight up assault. Nothing ever comes of it.
So apparently in this movie you can just shove a cop as long as
you're in a bikini apparently. I don't know, I don't get the
rules. You need to be starring in a
movie apparently and just shove a guy over a railing.
That seems really dangerous, but whatever.
That's the part where you find out that Baz gets bit on the leg
and apparently, but thankfully it just only leaks some red food
coloring. There was no damage because the
wound had no skin tear or anything.
You saw no meat, you just saw red.
And they never like they kind of talk about it again, but like
they threw a Band-Aid on it and that was good.
And that shark had his leg for a minute.
So there should be some pretty serious damage if any of those
three sharks bit him. But evidently he got bit by the
cuddle shark and that's fantastic for him.
Now my boyfriend immediately hits a shark with the surfboard,
which would of course startle it and keep it a little bit
distance. That be like one of your better
bets of like keeping it more than arm's length away.
Downside being that they act like he was being all fierce and
heroic and, and punching the shark with a surfboard and
that's what you're supposed to do.
No, don't punch a shark. That's not going to help.
But anyway, now he then decides once I get back up to the bar,
he's going to call his ex to tell her to evacuate when the
hurricane has officially arrived.
And at a certain point, you can't evacuate.
It's just more safe to stay where you are, even if it was a
bad choice to stay, than it is to leave and get stuck in
traffic or stuck on the road as the hurricane hits because
you're going to be safer in a building than in your car.
So typically, I'll say that I mean, certain trailers, maybe
not. But you know, your situation
might be different just if you are ever experiencing a
hurricane and you've decided to stay and it's getting bad and
you need to get somewhere, your best bets most likely to be to
hunker down where you are. There's a certain point close
enough to when hurricanes get there that it is no longer safe
for you to leave. And at this point, the hurricane
is there. No one should be leaving.
They all should have evacuated by now.
The fact that your bar is at the end of the Santa Monica Pier and
you were still were open that day, like, hey, we're going to
get customers. You're an idiot.
He, no, he does not deserve to have that bar anymore.
My goodness. Now they also showed that the
storm surge is a little overdramatic.
It didn't build up at all. Which typically storm surge will
come in waves quite literally the waves will get bigger and
bigger and bigger kind of like when high tide hits except they
just keep coming until they flood an area.
These waves went from calm to destroying the Santa Monica Pier
and throwing a shark through the window to then just not
existing. But it's Oh my gosh they they
should have destroyed the Santa Monica Pier with how big the
waves were but instead it's just tanking hits.
It's built for this apparently. Who knew?
They also, now this was a really big nitpick, I realized, but
this was back when I still had really high hopes for the movie.
So it does calm down after a while.
But looking at the sharks, they combine great whites and tiger
sharks in the models. And I don't mean like they had
great whites and then tigers like interacting because I mean,
like, yeah, it's I guess kind of possible, but not really.
But also like they they inhabit some of the same areas.
This one they would have a great Whitehead with stripes.
That doesn't really happen ever. No, you wouldn't get a
crossbreed like that. That's weird.
Then after they are showing off all these sharks and all this
carnage and everything, they show the Santa Monica Pier still
standing but on fire and the ocean is calm.
I'm sorry, the storm surge just threw 8 foot sharks through a
window, but suddenly everything's fine.
There's the Piers just on fire from the water, nothing else.
It's not washed away or anything like that.
I'm sorry, that just isn't how engineering works.
But you know, here we are now. I'm also starting to believe
that the creators of this movie didn't look into anything before
making this. They just kind of just threw
stuff at it. Of course, as they're trying to
run all around California to go get different family members and
different people all gathered up together, they're using a lot of
shaky Cam, which made me motion sick.
I had to pause the movie and walk around my apartment to get
my stomach to unflip, and then I could watch the rest of it.
But they use shakey Cam so much that I legitimately thought I
would have to take a drama mean to get through the movie.
I've never had that happen with the movie before.
It's happened with video games. It's happened on some rides.
Never has it happened watching a movie.
So congratulations to Sharknado, they are the 1st movie to make
me motion sick which is great. Now at this point as you're
driving to meet up with Finn's wife, ex-wife, whatever she is,
they never really clarify. But what they do is they have
them driving down the freeway and they have sharks on the
freeway, which is almost always a hoax in real life as many
freeways are just simply not close enough to flooding areas
for sharks to be able to swim there.
Freeways can flood. They're typically not right next
to the ocean, and even if they are, they usually don't flood
enough for sharks to be able to swim up onto them.
So usually you don't see a whole lot.
I believe there was one, I don't think it was from Milton.
I think it was an earlier hurricane this year or last
year, I can't remember which, but there was actually a shark
in someone's backyard. But other than that, they
usually tend to stay in the ocean or get away from there.
Now, in this case, not only are the sharks swimming on the
freeway, but they're also attacking cars around them,
which why would they do that? They'd be mildly concerned that
they are in an area that they aren't familiar with because
their brain won't let them panic.
So best they get is mild concern.
And I don't understand why the directors or creators of this
were like, you know, it's a great idea if we have the sharks
just biting cars because they wouldn't do that.
That makes no sense. It's also highly inconsistent
how much water is on these freeways.
So I'm throwing that out there. Now that just irritated me, but
a wave of water comes through and washes the cars in front of
our protagonists yet leaves their car alone.
Now they also at this point decide we got to get out of our
car and warn everyone about the sharks and then get them to
safety. Why though?
Like, I mean, I get trying to help those around you, but also,
are we forgetting the task at hand?
Are we like we're trying to get to our family to figure out what
we're going to do to save them? And instead we have decided that
Nope, highway sharks are going to be our big concern.
And although they're biting people all around us, they're
not going to touch us and we're somehow going to be ahead of the
water. I don't get it.
They also somehow magically get back to their their car.
God knows. So I'm just, I don't know.
And also, I love y'all, but if hurricanes start picking up
angry sharks that are set on eating everything and everyone,
I'm leaving. I'll put an episode on how to
try to stay safe. But I'm staying indoors.
I'm not running out on the streets to try to grab y'all.
Fend for yourselves. Like look at what's going on
around you. I'm not running out in that.
I don't know what to do. I've got a degree in social
work. I don't know what y'all want
from me. I'll do my best.
But the best you're getting is a podcast episode.
I'll tell you that much now, George, our bar regular gets
eaten because someone had to die.
I guess there wasn't really a rhyme or reason he was going to
help a dog. And then all of a sudden he's
running and next thing you know, he's goes and like looks to his
right and then there's just a wall of water that brings a
shark that eats him, which is dumb.
Didn't didn't need to do that. So you know, Anyway, now they're
driving from Santa Monica to Beverly Hills, which as of 722
on January 27th, 2025, Google Maps tells me that it was 31
minutes. Why is everyone still soaking
wet? Are y'all just driving with the
windows down? There is no reason.
Like y'all would still be wet, don't get me wrong, but why can
I still see the individual water drops on your face?
Y'all did not move. You're using the same footage.
Come on now. Like are you joking?
Now, of course, this is where I'm going to throw in that the
movie would not pick a lane. And this comes simply because
they now have a fight between the family, or what I call the
family confrontation scene, which was incredibly awkward
when it came to the acting. They kind of sat there and the
dude that's supposed to be the new boyfriend is like, no, this
isn't your family. I'm in control now.
And then Tara Reade, who's actually a pretty solid actress,
is like, hey, what are you doing?
I'm like, guys, guys, this was our best take really.
We we didn't want to run these lines again, but we just full
sent it. I can act better than this.
Like, are you joking? It was Oh my God, it was such
bad acting. I get that like they only had a
set budget and only set amount of time to do it, but you're
telling me that was the one we went with?
I I just don't get it. Now they also randomly have a
shark get in the house. Don't really have a whole lot to
say about that. It's I don't know why I got in.
It's really all I got now. There's a lot of chaos in the
scene, lot more shaky Cam, but someone, one of the bystanders
that's not fighting the shark yells punch it in the nose,
which no you don't, you're just going to make it mad.
Also the editing inconsistencies make me mad because the water
goes from green to red and back to green about 8,000,000 times.
They just kind of keep bouncing back and forth with this water.
Is it full of blood or is it not?
Pretty easy thing to check on and people watching the movie to
see for any editing inconsistencies or anything like
that evidently did not realize that they had not changed the
water or kept the water the same.
They just kind of kept bouncing back and forth.
So I guess at this point we use different takes, but God knows.
Now I want to point out bonus points for Nova the bartender to
waste ammo by shooting the shark with every shell they had, which
you really don't need to shoot a shark more than once.
You don't really need to shoot a shark at all.
Usually they they aren't coming for you like that but their skin
is rough. But I haven't come across any
bullet deflecting sharks. I could be wrong though.
Gators do deflect bullets so you got to be careful with them but
have not seen many sharks deflect bullets so.
Also I don't like that they named the main character Finn.
Like get out of here anyway now. Finn should have died pushing a
shark out of the house because the only thing we see of him
doing that is a shark breach towards him.
Land on top of him while he's got like a pole.
It's not even sharp and apparently he's going to push a
shark out the house and then he just pops up outside.
He should be dead. There's no reason that a multi
100 LB shark at minimum, if not 1200 lbs lands on top of you and
you somehow stab it or get it off of you without it being then
trapping you underneath of it. Also, its mouth was wide open
and it looked like its mouth was going right for the head.
So you're telling me you dodged all of its teeth?
I'm. I'm calling.
No, I don't know. You don't know what?
Yeah, shenanigans. I'm calling shenanigans.
You should not have been able to do that.
I. So there's two things that
really hurt my soul in this movie, and that is the awkward
flirting. In between like every scene like
they get in the car and Finn looks at Nova who's got a
shotgun and he's like huh, it's hot like in front of his ex-wife
and daughter. What is wrong with you?
Read the room. What are you doing?
It just does not make sense. It's one of those scenes that
like it was forced in to try to have like AB or AC plot going
but they already have plots A through E going and there's
trying to add like little stuff in there throughout which is
like dumb. So it that irritated me.
Also the reasoning behind why they do most things in this
movie irritated me as well. They came across a school bus
that had no movement inside, but Finn decides he's going to go
save the day and rappel off a bridge to check.
There's no reason to check that bus.
As mentioned, nothing is moving inside.
It's not even moving in the current.
It's not shaking, you hear nothing.
There's no reason to check this bus other than there's a bus
there and he's like there could be kids.
Now magically there's like 50 children in the bus.
The shark movies I'm watching are just getting worse and worse
and I'm very concerned that the ones I'm going to watch next is
going to be even worse than this and I am so scared.
I need a good shark movie. Please someone recommend me a
good shark movie that I will not be mad at because right now Jaws
is leading the way for most accurate shark movie and that's
a problem because jaws is highly inaccurate.
But the movie was good so that's all I got to say like please
something now they also when they're going into the bus show
what look like great whites swimming around outside the bus.
They then show B roll of a black tip reef shark turning sharp
right and then the bus jolts. You didn't even keep the same
species of shark and that irritated me so bad because for
most people it's in grayscale. It's fine, they're not going to
notice. But those black fins stick out
so bright in black and white like you would have been better.
Just leave it in color. I don't know what they were
doing. Also randomly had remora around
it which is is neat but I don't know why they were there as
well. And that was the B roll they
chose so there were no remoras. Edited onto the shark swimming
around the bus. I did not understand that choice
either. Now I will say as well, I noted
that the stunt double S that they use for the kids climbing
up the rope from the bus are so clearly adults.
Like they put like a little like 4 foot child on this like rope
to start climbing and then they cut and it's like a six foot
person and I'm like, Oh my God. So that that actually made me
laugh out loud. That was unintentionally
hilarious. And then they cut to the teacher
who's supposed to be like Comic Relief I guess, because they
have bro talking about how I came out here to be an actor.
Imagine that. And now I'm a teacher.
I get $15,000 a year and I got to teach screaming kids and you
believe me? Like bro, why are you yapping
about your life story like no one cares?
Then there's also some weird tension with the a shark
climbing up a rope, like it was just unnecessary.
Why is the shark coming up after him?
It don't care that much. No sharks going to be that hell
bent on biting someone. The shark found a way to wrap
itself in a rope and start climbing after him.
Mind you once again it's a great white.
Can be up to 1200 lbs. You're telling me that Baz up
there is pulling up a maybe 100 to 200 LB man along with an 800
to 1200 LB shark with a pulley system having no issues?
No, there's going to be a lot of issues that pop up.
That's all I can say. That does not make sense.
Why is he doing that? That just doesn't work.
That should not work at all. That rope should not be moving.
Also, the shark should be pulling the Hummer or whatever.
They don't even have a Hummer yet.
Sorry, jump in the story, jump in the shark, get it anyway.
But the car that they have, they've hooked up the pulley
system to this, which thinking back this now irritates me.
That car should been pulled over the side of the bridge and gone
into the water with the sharks. There is no reason anything was
anchored there. There is nothing that was
anchored there that would have held a shark.
I'm so done. Anyway, Finn almost died for
like the ninth time. At this point, I kind of stopped
believing that he was going to die at all in this movie.
Like anything that came next. I cannot suspend my disbelief
that he would live anymore. I feel like he'd get one or two
near death escapes in a movie, and 2 is really pushing it like
2. But they both have to be done
really well. All these were not done even
well. It's like all of them.
You could kind of tell things were going sideways, but he was
going to be OK. And most of the characters as
well, like you could almost feel when a death was coming or when
when it wasn't, it was way too telegraphed.
It was weird. Now at this point they go back
to the winds picking up again because the weather in this is
incredibly inconsistent. They both go from being a clear
beautiful day to then being it's a hurricane, it's a tornado.
It's the worst thing we've ever experienced in the matter of 5
minutes. Which once again, not how
weather works, but that's fine. So at this point the wind con
comes across and it blows the Hollywood letters across LA, but
none of the humans are getting blown across LA.
They're all fine. This movie really cares about
nothing except hating sharks. According to the Amazon device,
which I cannot say it's name or else it'll hear me and then
it'll start commenting on things in the background.
But according to that, those letters weigh 48.
Sorry, £480,000. I don't know why I can't read
numbers that well. That's weird, I should work on
that. But 480,000 lbs?
You're telling me the wind can pick up something that has
480,000 lbs, RIP it off of a mountain, but someone that is
100 and 5000 and 60 lbs is anchored to the ground?
No, they're also getting whipped around.
They're smacking into sharks in the sky.
But apparently in this movie they're not.
So, you know, science be damned, we're not listening to you,
we're just going to do our own thing.
Which my God. And also, maybe it's me being
cynical because the accuracy of anything in this movie is just
not there. But Finn's daughter doing the
whole I need to warn my parents love interest that my parents
suck trope in the liquor store is wild.
And it goes nowhere as well because she warns Nova.
She's like, I see how you look at my dad.
He's just going to hurt you the way you hurt my mom.
And then nothing else happens with that.
What was the point? What was the point?
Why? Why did we do that?
That was just to throw it in there just to to cause some
problems that weren't there. It's like he he had to go get
his daughter and she does nothing for this movie other
than try to drive plot points. And it's weird because all of
them are so forced. She is just being an angsty teen
to be an angsty teen and she looks like she's 25.
So I am so confused anyway. But of course when they get to
the the next news report, they're talking about how
there's tornadoes that are coming and they're graded on the
EF scale. So initially the news reports
that the tornado forming is an EF4 with the possibility of
becoming an EF 5 before it touches down virtually.
That's not a tornado until it touches the ground.
So what you measure in there, here's measuring wind speed.
It's not quite anything to be on the EF scale quite yet.
Secondly, the hurricane shouldn't be over.
It's been 45 minutes, if that. There's usually a few hours of
rain, especially in a hurricane as large as the one they showed
the beginning of the movie. That was massive, that one.
So going off of the bands that we got from Helene, when it came
through, that started at like 8:00 PM and the next day, like
when I went to bed around like midnight, one O clock, it was
still raining and we didn't even get the brunt of it.
That was just the bands that hit us.
So the outer arms, this hurricane lasted 45 minutes and
was huge. I was frustrated about that.
I was like, what in the world now?
They also would have already known what category the
hurricane was coming before it hits land, thus indicating how
strong the winds are and also indicating what level of
tornadoes you should expect. Now, just because the wind speed
is up to say, 200 miles an hour or anything like that, and
that'd be a category 5 hurricane, that doesn't mean
that the Tornadoes are going to be EF 5, because that doesn't
mean that when they get down below that, that can that
that'll change because we could get EF 1 tornadoes and a
hurricane. It's possible, but also why are
you reporting that this tornado is going to be so horrible when
you don't know that it's just all for for lip service I guess
God knows. But anyway.
So the crew somehow magically gets a Hummer.
They drive past a shark head that has a spine sticking out of
it. Sharks don't have spines, at
least not the great white that was shown.
They also showed multiple sharks with skulls.
They also don't have skulls so I don't.
I don't know what this what this is doing it it's they didn't
look into the sharks that they're using.
They didn't make sure they were accurate at all.
I mean, I get that the whole premise of this is the sharks
getting sucked up by a tornado, but can we have some degree of
realism to this? But we don't know.
Instead, we've got sharks with skulls and spines and they're
flying through the air and they're eating everything and
that's fantastic. We love it here now.
They also specify that the tornado is a waterspout over
land. Waterspouts only form over water
because it's essentially a tornado sucking up water.
Why is it in downtown LA? God knows, but I do not.
It's that frustrating me now in the sense of this movie need to
throw everything and anything that it could at the screen and
see what's stuck. And evidently everything stuck
because there was nothing left on the the cutting room floor.
There's a police chase in the movie.
Why? Why not?
At this point, that's the best answer I have for why did
anything happen here? Apparently the cops can't catch
a Hummer either, because that'd be too convenient, right?
You know, Hummer, they usually go really slow, accelerate
slowly, but they're going to outrun the cops.
So that's, that's good. It also conveniently has nitrous
installed in it. I'm running out of words.
I just the the freaking fever dream of this movie is it feels
like if someone was on LSD and they threw every single idea
they had at a writer and the writer went this full spitting
and wrote every single thing down handed it to someone and
they went we're making this a movie.
That's the only way that this makes sense because there is no
reason that any of us should go together now.
Finn must have super strength though, because they get to an
airplane hanger looking for their son.
Sorry. His and his ex-wife April, who's
played by Tara Reid, which will come back later because I
realized how much I don't talk about her throughout this as of
right now, simply because she doesn't do a whole lot in this
movie. Waste of a waste of talent right
there. That's just weird.
But anyway, but Finn, they get to this airplane hanger and the
tornado comes to get them because it's just following them
for some reason, which also you can usually get out of the way
of tornadoes. They usually don't just kind of
swerve back and forth, but this one decides it's heat seeking
and it's only on our protagonist.
So that's fun because even if they just went back to where
they came from, the tornado would be gone.
It'd be going the other way. But apparently this one would
just turn around and follow him. But this is a side note on the
fly now he has super strength because when it arrives, he's
holding a piece of sheet metal attached to a rope up against
like a airplane door, which any tornado is still whipping winds
at like 60, five, 7080 miles an hour at the minimum up to 200,
especially if this one. If they said it's EF 5, then 200
miles an hour. So you're telling me that Finn
can hold this with one hand? He doesn't have an arm anymore.
At minimum the sheet metal flew away and like he's got rope burn
and at maximum his arm ripped off.
We wouldn't let go of it. It does not make sense.
Now they also decide they're going to unlock a door by
shooting it, which why kick when you can shoot?
Now this of course is not shark related at all, neither with the
last couple points, but it just made me really mad because first
of all, how many times have they run out of ammo in this movie so
far? 3 And they keep getting shotgun
shells somehow they keep just keep being in the cars.
So we keep running out of ammo and we decide we're going to
shotgun the door open, not even hit it with the butt of the
shotgun, we're going to shoot it.
That would work, but that would also be a waste of ammo.
That's not smart. Now they also then decide that
their best plan to go with is to destroy a tornado with a bomb.
It's a stupid plan. Throwing a bomb at a tornado
will at best whip a bomb around in the air, and at worst will
whip a bomb into someone's house.
So you're essentially just a jerk throwing bombs that throw
bombs. Don't know what this plan was
supposed to do. Now, of course, at this point,
as they're coming up with a plan, Finn's daughter decides
she's going to fix her parents divorce in the middle of an
apocalypse. So she's sitting there moping.
Finn comes up and goes, what's wrong?
He's like, she goes, well, you're my problem.
You guys don't like each other unless you're saving my brother.
There are sharks floating around the atmosphere.
There's tornadoes all over the place carrying said sharks.
Your mother and I don't like each other, but we can also be
adults and realize hey, we got more hands that can help.
Or I could be like Nah, hate that Lady, she dumb, I'm not
going to get her and now I'm going to have one less set of
hands and also possibly die. Now, mind you, we'd also like to
point out they could have really not included her and everything
would have been fine, that the movie would have been the exact
same because she didn't do a whole lot.
But in real life, more hands on deck tends to help, especially
if you've lived with that person before.
So you know what they're they're like, you know, having that
familiarity helps too. But instead we're not going to
do that. We're going to have this whole
hashing out this moment now. And also bro then decides to
shame his daughter for her feelings.
He pretty much was like, yeah, you forget I came for you first.
You didn't know the brother was in town.
Dude, this isn't nothing. This is a nothing burger here.
You're literally just shaming her, being like you're emotional
and walking away. You've solved nothing, you're a
jerk and I hate you. So there we go.
Now at this point we've been teasing that Nova has a scar on
her leg. What's it from?
Oh no, it's weirdly in shark teeth pattern.
Wonder what it could be from? Shocking.
Oh no, we finally get the story and it's also dumb.
So yes, apparently she got it after a boating accident and six
people went in the water and one little girl came out.
I don't know what sharks you encountered.
Why would they eat people like that unless they're oceanic
white tips. But how are you so far out into
the ocean that you're seeing oceanic white tips?
That's not going to happen. Like, that's the also not
realistic. I don't get it.
Oh, my goodness. It just.
I'm frustrated. But yeah, no, she was hiding her
scar from a shark, which is great.
Now the whole movie I felt was just kind of fear mongering
sharks the entire time. The like sharks are scary
horrible. I hate sharks, I hate sharks.
There's literally no research put into them.
They were just like I feel like someone got bit by a shark when
they were little and instead of doing the normal human thing of
figuring out oh why did this happen?
How can I prevent in the future they went, I'm going to write a
movie and make sharks the main enemy and I hope it makes
everyone want to kill sharks because God, this movie makes no
sense now. Also, another thing that I
wanted to know is why a tornado was lasting hours when the
average lifespan of a tornado is 15 minutes.
They didn't get the sharks or the weather right?
Two most important plots for the movie.
So you know, I just don't know why anyone like this.
This movie irritated the hell out of me.
Now, the next bet of how we're going to solve our plan of
throwing a bomb into a tornado is that they're going to fly a
helicopter into a tornado. Now mind you, I know very little
about weather. I know a decent bit about
sharks. I don't know anything.
Well, I know a little bit about how planes fly.
Not a whole lot. I've played Flight simulator.
It's like kind of the extent of my knowledge.
I was in engineering class before in like 8th grade.
I had to make a plane at one point.
I don't think I paid enough attention, but doing my best
here. I feel like flying a helicopter
into a storm, especially a tornado, would just not go well.
I feel like that is grounds to get whipped around by said
tornado and end up upside down and just like propellering into
the ground. I feel like that is just how
that's going to end. I don't think that helicopters
are stable enough to fly through a tornado or a plane.
I don't think anything is stable enough to fly through winds of
that force. But in this movie, we're going
to fly right up to it. Have no problem because, you
know, give the give the tornado a good old good day right there.
You know, might as well, right? But of course, you know, I hate
it here. Now, of course, as they get
closer to said tornado, Nova has to let out a we're going to need
a bigger chopper, which Boo you leave Jaws out of this.
They did nothing wrong. They don't need your call back
now. Blowing up tornadoes works.
My annoyance just knows no balance at this point.
Like I that's that's all I wrote for that because that just
irritated me. Out of everything I'm like I
need something to fail here and instead they're like Nope it
exploded so you woo Hoo. I don't get it.
Now I am very much running out of things to say about this that
isn't just repeating the same stuff I've already said because
Baz now dies in a stupid way and the acting is without feeling
most of the time. All of the plot points are
inconsistent. Like it is just it's so
frustrating. Like kind of sum it up like it's
just all of it frustrates me. I'm going to go more and do it
later, I swear. Oh my goodness.
But also they every time they went to a news report, they use
the same reporter, which makes sense.
But tell me why every single report don't mind you when
you're watching the news, whenever there's a new thing
that pops up, you'll hear them. I can actually only think of 1
reporter's name out of Baltimore, but you'll anyway,
I'm going with her, but you'll hear.
Hi, I'm Deborah Weiner and tonight we have this blah, blah,
blah. Like they'll go into it or like
if they're cutting out to the field, they'll be like Deborah
Weiner here for blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah
that they'll go through that. That's actually her name.
She's a good anchor anyway, but unfortunately, but hilarious.
So they'll have like her on the scene.
She'll introduce who she is and go.
But this person every single time they report go, this is
Johnny Wave. That's Johnny with an I.
Why are you doing your little catch phrase when there are
sharks flying behind you? Like what?
What do you expect to get out of this Johnny with an I like, Oh
my God, I was so mad about that. When I heard that was like, if I
have to hear this one more time, like oh I'm so mad now.
They gave Tara Reid AKA April AKA Danny from Scrubs a hedge
trimmer to kill sharks. So the movie feels that sharks
can stop bullets, but hedge trimmers are where they draw the
line. That's their kryptonite, in case
anyone needed to know. So next time you go to the
ocean, bring a hedge trimmer. Might just save your life.
Don't. Actually, it won't.
Now. Also, evidently the movie felt
that chlorine inside pools would not kill sharks, but apparently
lighting a fool on pyre a pool on fire while it's raining works
great. I've been raining for so long my
brain and can't form letters. But no, when it's raining, fire
apparently works very well on a pool, so that's good.
So that irritated me. Now we all remember our good
friend George that I mentioned 20 minutes ago, who died
randomly for no reason on the highway.
They reused his actor in the nursing home.
I saw that he's supposed to be dead, not a resident there.
He's in a wheelchair. Chill.
And I'm like, that's, that's George, right?
That looks a lot like George. Or you got someone that looks
way too much like George, which either way, get a different
actor. Easy enough.
Or don't put that guy in the front.
Just a thought. Instead, no, they're like, oh,
nursing home. There's George called it to me.
I was like, good God. Now Matt, who is Finn and
April's son is flying this helicopter.
How we got here, I genuinely do not know.
Now he's flying the helicopter and he watches Nova fall out the
helicopter and get eaten by a sky shark.
And his response is to go, no, that's it.
That's the energy he brought. Are you joking?
There should be some trauma behind that.
Now Finn also watches his son almost die and somebody goes,
Matt, once again, why are we not putting any feeling into our
acting? Like, I'm not going to scream
into this mic right now, but oh, my God, there there'd be like
snot crying. It'd be gross.
Like, yeah, it would be a guttural reaction.
Instead, they're like, no, come back anyway on the more Sharks.
Like, it is the dumbest bit of acting on some parts.
And I swear. And I'm wondering if it was a
director choice or if it was like the actors just did not
care and knew they had very little times.
They were like bare minimum we'll make it work now.
I would also roast the CGI but it feels too easy so I'm just
going to choose to let that be a product of the budget that the
movie had. They also earlier in this, I
forgot to mention that they direct quote go we need to hit
the tornado just right to destroy it, but the final
tornado survives it's imperfect throw only for Finn to then jump
in the Hummer, load up the bombs, light them, use the
nitrous to send the Hummer into the tornado, which magically
puts the bomb at the right spot for it to explode.
I just don't get it. I don't get it.
Now to have the big finale.
We've had everything else leading up to it.
This is the the moment that we were waiting for.
This is what we've all sat through this 90 minute bit to
see. Finn goes to save his daughter
by shoving her out of the way while running with a chainsaw
and then jumps head 1st and chainsaw first into a shark
through its mouth into the stomach.
So essentially dying quote UN quote.
Not actually though, because you want to have a Hercules verse
the Hydra moment where he like cuts it open from the inside
out. You know, because that'd be
that'd be cool. But sharks don't work like that.
The margin for error in missing all of its rows of teeth is so
small you'd be sliced if you were able to get your head and
upper body through. You're looking more at slicing
your stomach and like your, your pelvis area, which all are not
good for bleeding. It tends to be pretty
detrimental. And those sharks, they, they do
have some very sharp teeth. So that's also not really
helping your, your chances. They also have a rather narrow
throat. The matter the size of the
shark, their throat is not just like the width of the rest of
their body. Like it tends to get kind of
small and go and do intestines and things like that.
So you wouldn't really be able to just to jump into a shark
mouth and end up in the stomach. That just doesn't make sense.
So yeah, that their body isn't hollow.
You'd have to go through organs. That's just not happening.
And even if you're chainsawing through, you're you're going to
run into the chainsaw eventually.
It's going to hit something that's too thick to to go
through, and you're going to just go into the chainsaw
yourself. So he should be very much dead.
But of course not because he and Nova pop out of this shark.
Now the odds of finding the shark that ate her in the sky
are incredibly low. And also she's been without
oxygen for so many minutes, so she's no functioning organs at
this point. But science isn't real and we
need to have a feel good moment. So she lives.
Now the movie decides it's going to have this nice wide shot to
to end. It ends with LA being in flames,
which is topical and multiple characters kiss while covered in
blood. And I would just like to say
real quick that I love my girlfriend very much but she's
ever covered head to toe in shark blood.
She's taking a shower before I kiss her.
I'd also have so many questions as to why she's covered in shark
blood, but I mean, that's just not a normal day.
But I mean, we're definitely going to settle on taking a
shower first before she gets a hug or a kiss or anything
because my, that's just gross. But Nope, they're all, they're
all fine with it. They're going to smooch.
So that's good. But overall, I thought the movie
was frustrating. Jaws had an amazing plot.
Even with how mad I got it 47 meters down and it's
manipulation, you could follow the story.
It felt like plot points were strung together sloppily.
In this movie, for example, they start with shark finning in the
Gulf of Mexico, and now there's a hurricane coming for
California. Nope, now it's a tornado.
Now it's three tornadoes. Oh God, California's flooding
but someone hasn't died in 5 minutes so we got to kill
someone and Oh no our plan didn't work.
Just kidding, it worked. Pick a lane.
Please for the love of God, pick a lane.
Oh my days. That was frustrating.
So I'm just going to go ahead and give this movie a -7 out of
10. I definitely recommend watching
it if you were over the age of 6 because none of the events
seemed remotely real. There is a lot of blood so be
warned, but holy smokes I did get a little entertainment out
of it trying to guess what was going to happen next.
But the movie is kind of horrendously bad.
It is funny ish, but at the times it's not supposed to be.
So that of course is what I have for Sharknado.
I'm really afraid for the next 1 so I'm going to watch.
But thank you all for listening, watching, following along on all
the things and being a part of this journey in any way shape or
form. Of course, you can always follow
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deep dives with sharks. Please send in any questions,
comments, give us a five star rating as well.
If you decided that you're going to watch this movie at some
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Tell a friend spread this as far as it'll go, and I will see you
guys in the next one. Bye.