Ladies and gents, it's corporate MILF back with another episode.
The question tonight is just so juicy to answer and I hope I can
give you a number of perspectives on this to start
thinking about this in more ways and I'd love to hear your
thoughts on this topic. The question is, what's the
biggest misconception couples have about keeping sex exciting
long term? The first thing that popped out
to me about this question is that this assumes that people
actually can keep sex exciting long term.
I think it also assumes that both people even have a desire
to do that. But assuming that the couple is
into that, then let's explore this a little bit further.
Perhaps we can tackle this from the perspective of a couple who
is married. This is very complicated when
you're looking at a couple that's married because first you
have to take a look at who's working.
You know, what's the stress pattern within these people's
lives? Do they have kids?
Is this a couple that has only been married, not only but has
been married for a couple of years and doesn't necessarily
have the stress of other aspects of life yet?
Or is this a couple who's been together for 15 years or more
and has seen a lot of stuff already together?
Because I think answering this question is going to be
different depending on what space that couple is in and what
is going to even be required to move from where they are now to
having it be more exciting. Because that's the premise of
this question. This question assumes that the
couple would like to have more exciting experiences.
I think one of the first things is that just because you're
married or just because you are in a relationship with this
person right now, a lot of couples forget to take care and
date the person who they're with.
And when you're married and you have a lot of other things going
in on in your life, like having, you know, kids and taking care
of a lot of different things, this can get really, really
tricky because you end up moving into the space where you're more
just like managing your life together.
So I think that if you're not taking the time to date the
person who you're with to, then that alone is going to
completely take out that level of interest.
It's going to remove that layer. So if you are considering adding
in a little bit more spice, maybe part of that just simply
starts with what are you doing together?
Are you going out together? Are you experimenting with new
places to go, whether that's traveling internationally or
checking out a new restaurant or going to some event together, it
it almost doesn't matter. What matters is the two people
are enjoying going out together during that time and that can
create a space that that couple can exist in that is outside of
that normal household routine. I also think that an entry level
space to think about sex is definitely penetration.
I would think that's probably the first thing that most people
are thinking about. And when it comes to sex, does
it have to be that all the time? I'm posing the question because
are there ways to enjoy each other that might not be just
that? Is it possible to investigate
other ways to be with each other intimately?
Is it possible to drop some areas of jealousy or maybe even
use jealousy to your benefit to create a little excitement in
the relationship? And what I mean by that is, I
don't know. Can you guys go to a strip club
together? It depends on what each person
wants and what turns on the other.
And then you can create certain rules around it.
So if I were to go to a strip club with the guy I'm dating, I
might say you're not allowed to touch her and you're only
allowed to touch me. You can look and you can get
excited, but only I'm allowed to touch her.
So I set that rule right, because that's what I desire,
but that doesn't mean that that's what everybody wants.
Some people might have completely different scenarios
that could pique their interests, and maybe it's time
to consider what those might be for each other.
I think it's a mistake to think that just because you're with
somebody, you've now locked them in for life.
And I understand that's what marriage is.
But if we can all just simply recognize that marriage is not
perfect, I think we can all agree on that, then that means
that there may be some flaws within the system.
And The thing is, is that there might be a standard for a person
of marriage, but that standard might not work for another
couple. And it's up to that couple to
decide themselves how they want to handle this partnership in
their life. Just because one person says you
can only have sex with the person who you marry and you
can't watch porn and you can't do this and that, OK, why?
I would just pose the question why?
If you can open yourself up to the possibility that whether
you're right or wrong, you're right, which is the same concept
with somebody else, whether they're right or wrong, in other
words, and if you agree with them or not, it doesn't matter
because that might be their perspective at the time.
And when you begin to honor the other person's perspective and
simply listen and not necessarily internalize that for
yourself or not necessarily even accept it for yourself, but
accept that that is where they are right now, then it can
create an energetic boundary between two people where you
don't feel like you're being crossed if someone doesn't agree
with you. And I think, at least in my
experience, it is so easy to begin to blame the other person
for literally anything. Like, I literally probably
spilled Lube on the floor myself and I was blaming it on someone
else. For real.
And I'm like, why is this still slippery?
Well, Abby, because you didn't clean it up yet.
And when you can start to hear yourself and the little ideas
that come into your head where you're like, God damn it, this
person did this. And you're like, actually, no, I
can take responsibility for that.
I don't know why I'm placing this blame on this other person
when you can start to do that with yourself and just have a
little game with it and realize like no one is perfect.
Everyone has these crazy thoughts that enter your head.
It's about can you hear the thought number one?
Can you objectively look at it to figure out if it's true or
not for you in that moment or the other person and just sit
with it and be kind of like OK with however that is in the
moment. One thing that I've realized
over the last couple of years is that everyone is on a different
place in their journey. I actually kind of thought that
as we grew up, like we're all supposed to be sort of equal in
a way with our experiences. And what I realized is like we
all take these crazy wandering paths and we all go through
these different experiences at different times, and they're all
shared in a way. There are all these shared
experiences that manifest in different ways for people, and I
love hearing about my friends experiences and just figuring
out like, wow, that's wild that you're going through that right
now, but you're always taking in what they're saying and
appreciating it because you know what?
They are dealing with that right now and it's a valid thing if
they're going through something. It is so easy to get into a
space when you're with somebody and you expect certain things
out of them and maybe don't allow the space for them to have
their own human mistakes. I definitely did this and it's
something that I'm always trying to work on now that it's
something that I've been aware of.
And so when it comes to the biggest misconception couples
have about keeping sex exciting, I think this is so multifaceted
because there's so many views that society has about intimacy
and there's so much that is taboo around this topic.
And it really doesn't need to be.
It's one of the most amazing, pleasurable experiences that we
can have on this planet. And when it's done with someone
who is reciprocating that interest, I really don't see
what's wrong with that. I guess all the ways you can
spice up a relationship with sex are all the other episodes that
I have released, so go ahead and listen to those and let me know
what you think. You can always find me on TikTok
at Corporate MILF on X at Finn Dom Jim Queen and Only fans at
the real Jim Queen. As always, you are not allowed
to come until I do Peace.