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Our topic of discussion still 
remains lessons on friendship. 

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We are taking the eighth session
today and for today the 

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particular focus will be the 
concept of association and 

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destiny. 
Mutation in friendship. 

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The concepts of association. 
No association is another word 

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for friendship. 
You associate is the reason you 

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are in friendship and if you are
in friendship you will always 

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associate. 
So the concept of association 

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and destiny mutation in 
friendship. 

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Mutation means changes. 
Mutation means what changes a 

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kind of breaking about a 
difference from the original. 

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So destiny motivation in 
friendship. 

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Now what many people really 
don't know is that friendship is

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a platform for the exchange of 
ideas. 

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So the environment where you 
have the best, the platform for 

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communication is friendship. 
In friendship you are free, you 

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find it comfortable, you find it
convenient to converse. 

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So where there is conversation, 
there will be exchange of ideas.

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But not many people take a 
particular note of that, that in

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the process of exchanging ideas,
OK, your world view is also 

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changing, Your perspective is 
also changing. 

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You cannot stay in friendship 
and remain riches. 

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There will be an influence that 
your friend has or you, as a 

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result of which your world view 
is changing. 

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And as your world view is 
changing, you also discover that

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the philosophies and the 
principle by which you approach 

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situations of life will also be 
changing alongside. 

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So take note that in friendship 
you are standing on the platform

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for the exchange of ideas. 
You can also feel friendship as 

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platform for interchange of 
habits. 

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So there is no way you exchange 
ideas that has effect on your 

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convictions and it will not 
reflect on your habits. 

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So the best is that any person 
you have seen that has the kind 

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of habits you can't go along 
with. 

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Be careful of going to freshly 
with such a person. 

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It is popularly said that so me,
your friend and I will tell you 

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who you are. 
Fiore de homie queso urania tea 

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OJ. 
So it's a platform for 

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interchange of habits and this 
interchange of habits can 

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ultimately lead to destiny 
mutation. 

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By that I mean it can change 
your course of life. 

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It can influence you to change 
your direction in life. 

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And that's what I mean by 
destiny mutation. 

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Now when you start out alone, 
you are following a particular a

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particular trajectory, a 
particular direction. 

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But by the time a friend comes 
into your life and you are 

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standing together on that 
platform of exchange over there 

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interchange of habits, before 
you know what is happening, 

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instead of going left is that is
that to go right instead of 

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going right you have to go left.
In fact, it can be so 

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influential on you that you can 
make a complete U-turn and 

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people around you will notice 
that they begin to ask 

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questions. 
Is it not the same shadow that I

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used to know it used to be it 
used to be very reserved, but 

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today since an astrophot 
everywhere somewhere, somehow, 

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somewhere, OK, if friend has 
influenced, am I talking to 

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somebody? 
So it can ultimately lead to 

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destiny mutation. 
Now this is the caution. 

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So where you call when you are 
standing on that platform, we 

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are caution, wisdom and the fear
of God are not allowed to 

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dominate. 
It may lead to destiny, 

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motivation. 
Where you multilate something, 

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it means you destroy it. 
Are you with me? 

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So it's allowed if the mutation 
OK, is positive. 

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If the mutation we have value to
your life, but in the place 

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where you are standing on that 
platform, you do exercise 

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caution, you don't apply wisdom 
and you did not permit for the 

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fear of God the kind of mutation
that will take place. 

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Change that will happen to you 
can eventually lead to destiny 

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motivation. 
I pray for you. 

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I pray over your destiny. 
You will not embrace a 

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relationship that will multilate
your destiny. 

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You will not embrace a 
relationship that will destroy 

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your destiny in the name of 
Jesus. 

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So the greatest influence of 
friendship is force felt and 

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seen in your habits. 
You want to assess the 

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profitability or otherwise of 
friendship. 

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The first thing you check is 
your habits. 

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Am I talking to somebody? 
So the greatest influence of 

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friendship is false faith and 
same in your habits. 

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So when there is interchange of 
habits, OK, the consequent 

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result is that you will have a 
different perspective to life. 

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You embrace new philosophy, new 
principle, and then you start to

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behave differently from what you
have always been known for. 

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So in essence and in summary, no
friendship leaves you the same. 

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No level of friendship leaves 
you the same. 

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If you connect to the right 
person, you embrace positive 

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values. 
If you connect to the wrong 

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person, you embrace negative 
values. 

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No friendship leaves you the 
same. 

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It is either it leaves you with 
increased wisdom, you become 

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wiser, leaves you with 
multiplied wealth. 

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OK, they are friends that come 
into your life. 

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I start to to gain values and 
ideas that help you to multiply 

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wealth and of course on the 
negative side it can also leave 

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you with grievous wounds whereby
you suffer injury. 

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I pray, I pray the Lord will 
insulate you against destiny 

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injury. 
As you are associating life in 

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the name of Jesus, so no 
friendship leaves you the same. 

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It will either leave you with 
increased wisdom, multiply word,

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or grievous wound to leave. 
Proverb 1320 Make it your memory

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verse. 
Let it guide you as your 

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associate in life. 
He that worketh with a wise man 

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shall be wise, but a companion 
of food shall be destroyed. 

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That summarizes what I have been
saying, that in friendship 

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destiny mutation is imminent. 
In friendship, when caution, 

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wisdom, and the fear of God is 
not factored in destiny, 

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multilation may result. 
And the wise man put it in 

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proverb succinctly Proverb 1320,
that worketh with the wise men 

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shall be wise. 
So increase wisdom, and by 

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increased wisdom you can also 
increase words. 

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Then they be part of it. 
But a companion of food shall be

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destroyed, a companion of food. 
Ungodly people, rascally people,

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people without the fear of God. 
A companion of such set of 

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people, their destiny will be 
motivated. 

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So it is not in the nature of 
friendship to leave you as you 

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are. 
Friendship will compel a change 

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on you. 
It's never in the nature of 

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friendship to leave you as you 
are. 

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It must influence you in one way
or another. 

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That's friendship for you. 
No matter how short lived the 

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friendship is, it will make a 
mark on you. 

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I pray the friends you keep will
make you a star. 

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The friends you you keep will 
not give you a scar if you are 

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die. 
You know, that's what some 

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friends are in the lives of 
their friends. 

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But for you, I pray that the 
friends you keep, you will 

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choose them by the instruction 
of the Holy Spirit, by wisdom, 

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and therefore by your 
association together you will 

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become stars in the name of 
Jesus. 

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So it's never in the nature of 
friendship to leave you as you 

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are. 
It must influence you in one way

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or another to the degree that 
even when your friend is sick in

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the body or in a problem, I'm 
painting a practical situation. 

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If you are committed to 
friendship, if your heart is in 

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friendship, your friendship, 
your friendship enter a level 

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that is called soul time. 
OK. 

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It can be so practical that when
your friend is sick in the body 

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or your friend is in the 
problem, you also become sick in

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the mind. 
Hello. 

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Is that not if you are really 
committed to friendship and your

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friend is sick in the body, are 
you aware of it? 

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You will not be able to bear it.
Or your friend is in one form of

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problem or the other, You don't 
discover that for that moment 

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you also become sick in the 
mind. 

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And if you are not a good 
manager of your emotion, you may

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also come down with a more 
serious bodily sickness. 

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Is that serious? 
You can also come down with a 

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more serious bodily sickness. 
There are people who have heard 

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about the fact that their friend
had an accident, OK. 

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And the way they respond, they 
come down with stroke. 

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Hello, are you with me? 
So that is how serious 

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friendship could be. 
And so for today, we are going 

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to probe this matter for them, 
the concept of destiny 

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interference and interchange of 
habits in friendship. 

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You know, once you come into 
that platform of friendship, 

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there will always be destiny 
interference, the destiny of A 

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we interfere with the destiny of
B. 

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And obviously it can be seen in 
interchange of habits. 

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Some measure of character that 
you see in A, you begin to find 

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it being expressed by B and this
was A. 

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So why interaction take place as
a result of friendship may not I

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mean why the interaction that 
takes place as a result of 

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friendship may not completely 
change you? 

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We are not saying you completely
change. 

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It may not completely change 
you. 

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But the truth, like I keep 
emphasizing, is that no 

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friendship leaves you as you 
were before you entered it. 

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No friendship leave you as you 
were before you enter it. 

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So in friendship, interference 
of habits, character, and so on 

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and so forth will take place. 
So you discover that you handle 

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losing a part of you to your 
friends, you lose a part of you 

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to your friend, and then you 
gain a part of your friend to 

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yourself. 
It happen in any form of 

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friendship. 
OK, let's take it even from 

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diet. 
There are foods you are eating 

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today, not because when you 
started out in life, you love to

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eat that kind of food, that kind
of diet, but because your friend

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enjoy it. 
Your friend introduced you to it

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and now you enjoy it. 
Church through a force so and on

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and on and on. 
There are practical examples 

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like that there are people who 
naturally when they started out 

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in life they grew up in in a 
family and environments that 

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don't have to do anything to do 
with alcohol. 

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But today they have become 
Alcoholics because they keep 

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friends that drinks, smoking, 
doing drugs and all of those 

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things. 
Influence of influence of 

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friends. 
So you lose part of you to your 

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friend and you gain part of your
partner in any form of 

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friendship where there is 
commitment. 

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And of course, like I mentioned 
earlier, friendship does not 

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have to be deep to make a 
significant mark on those who 

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are involved in it. 
OK, there is a friend that stay 

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in your life one week and it 
changes you are you with me for 

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good and as a friend I didn't 
stay in your life more for that 

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one week and the damage he 
caused you are still leaking the

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wound, OK ten years after. 
So friendship does not have to 

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be deep to make his remark on 
those who are involved in it. 

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So when we talk about the 
concept of destiny, interference

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and friendship, this has to do 
with the effects that friendship

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has on your personality, the 
effects that friendship has on 

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your personality. 
So when we talk about destiny, 

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interference, destiny, 
motivation and friendship, we're

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talking about the effects that 
friendship has on your 

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personality and consequently on 
the direction of your life 

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journey. 
Whatever affect your 

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personality, we are fed the 
direction of your life journey. 

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And my simple definition for 
destiny is direction of life 

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journey. 
I pray in the name of Jesus you 

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will not make a friend from 
people that are running on the 

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wrong lean of destiny. 
It's a prayer that I expect a 

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louder Amen from you. 
You will not keep company with 

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people that are running on the 
wrong lane of destiny in the 

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name of Jesus. 
People who are running on the 

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wrong lane of destiny, they keep
upbeat and they engage in 

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activity that may make them end 
up in prison. 

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Am I talking to somebody that 
may make them end up as failures

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in life? 
Mukh padra luria your money and 

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you be Mukh padra Luria your 
money. 

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They will not keep the company 
of those that are running on the

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wrong lane of destiny. 
In the name of Jesus, you will 

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not choose for a husband. 
You will not choose for a wife, 

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a man, a woman running on the 
wrong lane of destiny. 

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In the name of Jesus, we have 
seen examples upon examples 

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whereby you will see a very 
wonderful lady and then people 

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will look at the kind of money 
in marijuana, open it by you. 

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They will say, oh, regrettably, 
this man has destroyed this 

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lady. 
I play a game for you as you 

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choose who to marry in life. 
Young people, hear me and let 

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your heart be in this prayer. 
You will not choose for a 

231
00:18:07,640 --> 00:18:10,160
husband. 
You will not choose for a while 

232
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:15,360
a man, a woman running on the 
wrong land of destiny in the 

233
00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:27,600
name of Jesus. 
So the same go for interchange 

234
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:31,880
of habits. 
This deals with the reality of 

235
00:18:31,880 --> 00:18:35,560
soul time. 
I mentioned that already so 

236
00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:42,960
tired a situation whereby your 
friends succeed OK and you begin

237
00:18:42,960 --> 00:18:45,840
to have a feeling that you don't
need to pursue success again. 

238
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:51,000
You are in the success together 
and your friend entire problem 

239
00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:54,400
OK. 
And it's like your own world is 

240
00:18:54,400 --> 00:19:02,960
also crumbling down South 
interchange of habits that can 

241
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:10,480
eventually lead to a detour in 
your direction of life journey. 

242
00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:22,160
So in friendship you discover 
that you enter a bonding that 

243
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:27,360
will influence you to borrow or 
inherit character traits of your

244
00:19:27,360 --> 00:19:29,320
friend. 
That's what happened. 

245
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:36,000
It's a bonding that will not 
influence you to borrow or to 

246
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:39,800
inherit the character trait of 
your friend. 

247
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:45,240
OK, I have had parents say it in
Yoruba to their children or 

248
00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:52,800
multimobe called yiwaniwa longu 
or multimobe called le Yiwaniwa 

249
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:59,320
longu. 
So as a result of what the 

250
00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:03,080
sociologists call Pierre prayer,
what do I call it? 

251
00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:06,240
Pierre prayer, Pierre prayer, 
Pierre prayer. 

252
00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:15,520
But you may not notice this when
your friendship is on and in its

253
00:20:15,760 --> 00:20:20,880
juvenile season of bonding. 
So the changes that friendship 

254
00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:23,960
bring upon a man is faster than 
you can comprehend. 

255
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:28,800
That's what I'm talking about. 
The changes that friendship 

256
00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:32,800
brings into the life of a man, 
particularly young people, is 

257
00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:38,880
faster than you can comprehend. 
So before you realize, see so 

258
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:42,120
many changes has taken place 
before you come to the 

259
00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:52,640
consciousness of what is really 
happening, so many changes has 

260
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:58,000
already occurred. 
So when your friendship is at a 

261
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:01,720
juvenile stage, you may not 
realize it has caused you a 

262
00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:05,800
sift. 
So inside every form of 

263
00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:08,360
friendship, a sift will always 
take place. 

264
00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:17,080
A sift of mindset, a sift of 
habits, a sift of perspective, a

265
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:23,480
sift of orientation, a sift of 
direction, a sift in your 

266
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:27,520
convention. 
OK, all of these, thank you. 

267
00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:41,680
God bless you. 
All of these happen without, you

268
00:21:43,240 --> 00:21:48,680
know, being consciously aware of
what is going on. 

269
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:55,480
However, when you are living in 
the oblivion of what is going 

270
00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:59,440
on, by virtue of the kind of 
company you are keeping, the 

271
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:02,440
people who are watching you, you
can notice it. 

272
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:10,120
Hello, it is you. 
Because of the emotional 

273
00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:14,040
attachment that has gone into 
the relationship, you may not 

274
00:22:14,080 --> 00:22:20,360
realize that shifts are taking 
place, but the people around you

275
00:22:21,120 --> 00:22:25,880
that are watching you can notice
either the positive or negative 

276
00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:32,080
metamorphosis that has occurred 
or is ongoing in your habits. 

277
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:39,320
In fact, is spiritually 
sensitive and socially conscious

278
00:22:39,320 --> 00:22:44,400
parents will know it when a new 
friend comes into the life of 

279
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,680
his child, even when he has not 
met the friend. 

280
00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:55,360
Hello parents in the house. 
If you are not sensitive to that

281
00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:57,760
level then you need to work on 
yourself. 

282
00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:05,520
Oppo do maru amato B. 
If I think about the yato OK, 

283
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:10,000
he's able to lay your finger on 
what is causing the change, 

284
00:23:10,120 --> 00:23:14,720
either positive or negative. 
So especially sensitive and 

285
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:19,320
socially conscious parent would 
know it when a new friend comes 

286
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:23,800
into the life of his child even 
when that parent has never met 

287
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:30,240
the friend. 
In fact, it always reflects very

288
00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:34,680
much easily when a friend of the
opposite sex enter the destiny 

289
00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:38,440
space of your youth. 
Hello. 

290
00:23:39,120 --> 00:23:47,120
Even our illiterate mothers in 
the village, when a friend of 

291
00:23:47,120 --> 00:23:52,040
the opposite sex enter the 
destiny space of their youth, 

292
00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:57,880
they know it. 
When it happen, it may reflect 

293
00:23:57,880 --> 00:24:04,880
as a newly found confidence and 
then some parents will interpret

294
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:10,880
it as insolence. 
So the the the young man, the 

295
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:15,840
young woman will know we 
demonstrate some new level of 

296
00:24:15,920 --> 00:24:20,000
confidence, demonstrate some new
level of independence. 

297
00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:26,520
OK, to the degree that Ubia 
interpreted be on say oya du 

298
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:32,800
tabi on tabu. 
Hello tabon Shi Arifi. 

299
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:34,560
I think that's the proper word. 
Don't say arifi. 

300
00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:44,840
So, so insolence. 
So at that point such a youth 

301
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:52,160
need is help and not insult. 
So some of the parents that take

302
00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:56,680
note of such rather than help 
the youth and guide the youth 

303
00:24:56,680 --> 00:25:01,920
deny start to insult them. 
You will not tell your corny I 

304
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:04,160
told you were at least like 
that. 

305
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,200
If mothers in the house, if your
parent ever say that you cannot 

306
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:11,920
see your hand off or your auntie
ever say that to you, then I was

307
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,840
OK praise the name of the Lord. 
But that is the truth. 

308
00:25:14,920 --> 00:25:19,840
Very practical. 
Hallelujah, Hallelujah. 

309
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,360
So learn these and know how to 
help your own youths. 

310
00:25:26,480 --> 00:25:29,920
Then depending on the 
temperament of the youth, it may

311
00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:38,360
reflect as emotional withdrawal 
and that may even tell on the 

312
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:44,960
academic performance. 
Why now they are now getting 

313
00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:51,320
involved in the emotion draining
love in Tokyo extra curricular 

314
00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:54,440
activity. 
And so because of that you see 

315
00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:58,720
withdrawal and then you guys not
freaking start to tell even on 

316
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:03,360
their academic performance. 
So generally a friend has the 

317
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:06,160
best opportunity to change you 
positively. 

318
00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:10,080
A friend has the best 
opportunity to change you 

319
00:26:10,120 --> 00:26:14,880
positively. 
And of course a wrong one also 

320
00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:17,400
has the easiest opportunity to 
influence you negatively. 

321
00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:20,800
He says opportunity to influence
you negatively. 

322
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:26,520
We study Amnon. 
I think last week that guy 

323
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:30,520
wouldn't have gone into that 
wrong act of raping the step 

324
00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:33,680
sister. 
But a simple suggestion from a 

325
00:26:33,680 --> 00:26:36,400
friend messed the whole team up 
for him. 

326
00:26:37,360 --> 00:26:42,280
His destiny was motivated on the
platform of keeping the company 

327
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:46,720
of a friend that is running on 
the wrong lane of destiny. 

328
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:50,040
I pray again for you, you will 
not keep the company of that 

329
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:52,600
boy, You will not keep the 
company of that guy. 

330
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:55,440
You will not keep the company of
that man or woman, Ronnie or the

331
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:59,320
wrong name of destiny in the 
name of Jesus. 

332
00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:06,320
Then when you come on that 
platform of destiny interference

333
00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:18,240
call friendship, you will notice
that No 2 friends have evenly 

334
00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:25,640
shared common capacity. 
So you won't come to that space 

335
00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:29,000
with capacity that is evenly 
shared. 

336
00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:34,440
When it comes to influence, you 
will discover that one may have 

337
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:37,560
upper hand when it comes to 
influence. 

338
00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:44,480
Introducing habits, introducing 
perspective, introducing ideas. 

339
00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:49,200
No, you will not come on the 
platform with evolution, the 

340
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:57,440
capacity, in fact, your capacity
will not be replica, but because

341
00:27:57,440 --> 00:28:00,400
you are standing on that 
platform of destiny 

342
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:03,680
interference. 
You would go that with one thing

343
00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:06,120
that this list they will be 
blending. 

344
00:28:09,400 --> 00:28:11,560
So what when the friendship 
started? 

345
00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:15,360
Some of the things you don't 
agree with, you won't know where

346
00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:17,520
you start to embrace it and 
practice it. 

347
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:19,800
You understand what I'm talking 
about? 

348
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:25,120
The kind of diet you don't 
enjoy, OK? 

349
00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:27,800
You won't know when it's 
suddenly become your favourites 

350
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:30,040
diet. 
Why? 

351
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:36,560
Because the one that comes in 
with the superior capacity to 

352
00:28:36,600 --> 00:28:41,640
introduce ideas or to influence 
you is the one that love that 

353
00:28:41,640 --> 00:28:45,480
kind of diet. 
And so with your bonding, you 

354
00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:52,360
start to blend. 
So when you now find 2 friends 

355
00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:57,360
that are now demonstrating the 
same trees, they are now 

356
00:28:57,440 --> 00:29:01,200
behaving the same way. 
They now love to wear the same 

357
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:03,480
type of colour. 
You come in with the mindset 

358
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:08,640
that my best colour is white. 
The other one best colour is is 

359
00:29:08,640 --> 00:29:11,400
blue. 
Suddenly your best colour became

360
00:29:11,520 --> 00:29:16,200
white becomes white. 
OK, that's what happened over 

361
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:23,080
time. 
So it happened as a product of 

362
00:29:23,280 --> 00:29:27,320
the bonding and consequently the
blending that has occurred 

363
00:29:27,680 --> 00:29:32,880
because interchange of your 
respective habits is taking 

364
00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:36,960
place very fast. 
So destiny mutation is already 

365
00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:40,720
occurring gradually. 
So when friends start to 

366
00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:46,120
influence themselves like we 
have it in genetics, 1 trait 

367
00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:49,840
will be dominance, the other 
traits will be recessive. 

368
00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:53,520
I want to believe you understand
that perspective from basic 

369
00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:56,320
biology. 
So just as we have it in 

370
00:29:56,320 --> 00:30:00,640
genetics, when friendship, when 
friends come together to start 

371
00:30:00,640 --> 00:30:04,520
to interact, you will discover 
that while we come with dominant

372
00:30:04,520 --> 00:30:08,720
capacity to influence the 
relationship, the other one that

373
00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:12,080
has the recessive habit will be 
so you understand it. 

374
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:14,280
So you understand it, So you 
understand it. 

375
00:30:14,440 --> 00:30:18,920
And somebody is already driving 
you in his own direction as he 

376
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:21,600
gets your own direction. 
Am I talking to somebody? 

377
00:30:29,390 --> 00:30:33,470
So influence in friendship is 
therefore not shared evenly. 

378
00:30:34,430 --> 00:30:39,150
One of the two partners, we have
the higher receptive capacity. 

379
00:30:40,390 --> 00:30:44,320
OK, you just absorb, you just 
agree so that there will be 

380
00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:46,240
peace, so that there will be 
understanding, so that 

381
00:30:46,240 --> 00:30:48,600
relationship will not break even
in marriage. 

382
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:54,040
Then the other we have the 
higher driving capacity. 

383
00:30:56,040 --> 00:31:00,600
So the dominant one we have the 
higher driving capacity, the 

384
00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:05,600
recessive one, we have the 
higher receptive capacity. 

385
00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:10,320
If guy is not thinking OK, 
receptivity will become 

386
00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:15,400
stupidity. 
Am I talking to somebody 

387
00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:18,360
receptivity we call all 
stupidity. 

388
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:22,280
So you need to be careful. 
So the one with receptive 

389
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:26,920
capacity will always be the one 
that's so small understanding to

390
00:31:26,920 --> 00:31:31,480
keep relationship mutual. 
But he must beware of what I 

391
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:37,160
call collaborative syndrome, 
whereby everything through now 

392
00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:40,920
choose what to swallow 
everything through. 

393
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:46,840
That is what you accept. 
You must learn to put in 

394
00:31:46,840 --> 00:31:51,480
deliberate efforts to know where
to draw the boundary. 

395
00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:58,040
Put in deliberate effort to know
where to do what to draw the 

396
00:31:58,040 --> 00:32:01,120
boundary. 
So if you possess the receptive 

397
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:07,400
capacity and in a higher manual 
in your relationship, don't 

398
00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:09,320
blame yourself. 
It is your nature. 

399
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:13,440
Are you with me? 
Don't blame yourself, it's your 

400
00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:18,200
NATO. 
But there is one thing you must 

401
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:22,320
guide against. 
And what is that thing guide 

402
00:32:22,320 --> 00:32:26,200
against? 
Losing your capacity for self 

403
00:32:26,280 --> 00:32:31,760
administration completely to the
collective decision or advice 

404
00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:34,520
from your friend. 
Do you understand why you want 

405
00:32:34,640 --> 00:32:38,480
me to come again? 
Now you have the IR receptivity 

406
00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:44,600
receptive capacity. 
Don't blame yourself for it. 

407
00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:46,600
It's your nature. 
It's your nature. 

408
00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:51,200
But then agree that it is your 
nature. 

409
00:32:51,320 --> 00:32:55,680
You must also not allow 
receptivity to become stupidity 

410
00:32:55,680 --> 00:32:58,960
like I say. 
And how do you succeed at at 

411
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:03,280
that? 
Don't lose your capacity for 

412
00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:06,960
safe administration. 
So one thing you must be saying 

413
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:09,880
is the capacity for self 
administration. 

414
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:13,520
There are things over which you 
will answer for yourself. 

415
00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:17,960
So don't submit something to 
collective decision or advice of

416
00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:21,520
your friend and I will explain 
for that. 

417
00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:29,320
So you need to learn how to say 
no without feeling guilty. 

418
00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:32,840
So people don't have that 
capacity to say no. 

419
00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:36,800
They feel guilty whenever their 
friend make a demand and they 

420
00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:40,760
don't give it. 
So you don't give in every time,

421
00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:45,800
particularly where you know that
what is being demanded of you is

422
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:51,800
injurious to your destiny. 
So how to retain or maintain 

423
00:33:51,920 --> 00:33:55,560
your capacity for self 
administration in a relationship

424
00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:03,000
is not to lose your capacity for
self administration. 

425
00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:08,719
Do everything to maintain or 
retain your capacity for self 

426
00:34:09,159 --> 00:34:16,239
administration. 
So and it is known by you 

427
00:34:16,760 --> 00:34:21,480
learning how to say no without 
feeling guilty. 

428
00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:34,000
So as you go into friendship 
because destiny mutation is 

429
00:34:34,159 --> 00:34:39,360
something that must happen and 
destiny multination may result 

430
00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:44,520
if you are not wise. 
So go into friendship game with 

431
00:34:44,560 --> 00:34:46,960
your capacity for destiny 
insulation. 

432
00:34:51,159 --> 00:34:56,679
You insulate yourself against 
embracing bad habits or copying 

433
00:34:56,679 --> 00:35:03,280
bad habits from your friend, and
the way you do that is by you 

434
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:09,680
developing or learning the 
ability to say no with courage. 

435
00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:15,600
Say no with courage. 
More importantly, where your 

436
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:21,880
confession is about being 
violated or disrespected, so you

437
00:35:21,880 --> 00:35:26,280
must not so love your friend. 
To disagree that your friend, 

438
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:29,920
you call himself your friend, 
but there is never a time he 

439
00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:32,880
respects your view. 
What is it? 

440
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:35,640
Don't do now. 
Am I talking to somebody? 

441
00:35:36,320 --> 00:35:40,320
Your view too must be respected.
If you have a friend that 

442
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:44,120
doesn't respect your view is not
a good friend, he's only taking 

443
00:35:44,120 --> 00:35:52,600
advantage of your culibility. 
So always remember that joint 

444
00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:57,360
decision don't always translate 
to collective responsibility 

445
00:35:57,360 --> 00:36:01,200
when the chiefs are down. 
Yeah, we agreed to do it 

446
00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:05,560
together. 
I had input of my friend before 

447
00:36:05,560 --> 00:36:10,720
I took the decision. 
My friend said we should do it, 

448
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:14,480
and I follow him. 
Collective decision, collective 

449
00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:18,960
action may not always translate 
to collective responsibility 

450
00:36:19,280 --> 00:36:23,400
when the chiefs are down. 
Every man will carry his own 

451
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:29,760
cross, so that's why I must 
learn how to draw the boundary. 

452
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:34,200
Every man we carry what his own 
cross. 

453
00:36:34,280 --> 00:36:39,960
So it is wise, therefore, to ask
yourself anytime and every time 

454
00:36:39,960 --> 00:36:45,120
you advise, who will answer for 
the consequences of the action? 

455
00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:50,400
Who will be had the consequence 
effect of Sydney? 

456
00:36:51,080 --> 00:36:55,440
But when the chips are down, who
will bear the consequence? 

457
00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:58,080
Why? 
Because there's a mean for you 

458
00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:04,680
in that relationship to come in 
with destiny insulation 

459
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:07,280
mechanism. 
Otherwise your destiny will be 

460
00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:11,840
multilated. 
Ye that workers were the wives 

461
00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:16,120
were the wives, the companion of
fools shall be what destroyed. 

462
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:25,080
I begin to wind down by saying 
if the consequence is solely 

463
00:37:25,080 --> 00:37:29,200
yours to bear. 
If the consequence is solely 

464
00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:34,640
yours to bear, then give every 
joint decision a second thought 

465
00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:37,880
before you commit to acting on 
them. 

466
00:37:39,880 --> 00:37:48,200
The Yoruba proverb says TD Baba,
you'll have to complete it to 

467
00:37:48,200 --> 00:37:56,080
need the Lunda. 
So if eventually the test goes 

468
00:37:56,080 --> 00:37:59,360
wrong, you bear the consequence 
alone. 

469
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:05,560
Therefore, go into every 
friendship with your destiny 

470
00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:11,760
insulation mechanism intact. 
And I put it succinctly this way

471
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:18,760
because destiny mutation is 
imminent in friendship and 

472
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:24,720
destiny mutilation is a 
possibility to in friendship go 

473
00:38:24,720 --> 00:38:30,680
into friendship with a 
functional destiny in solution 

474
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:36,160
sensibility. 
God bless you in Jesus name.