Hello, beautiful humans and welcome to the mental Wellness.
Wake up, show a weekly podcast where growth minded creative
people, come to learn, best practices from both spirituality
and psychology that create lasting well-being.
I am your host mental Wellness, expert improvised acting teacher
therapist and Coach, Don McMillan.
Let's get to it. It.
Hello. Hello.
Hello you. Beautiful humans.
As I'm recording this. It is December 20, 22.
And one of my favorite things about the month of December is
that for those of us who live in the Northern Hemisphere, we are
surrounded by light. I think it's a beautiful common
experience that we have in variety of cultures and variety
of country in a variety of religions this impulse.
To create light in the winter. As this beautiful reminder that
the sun will come back and that we have the power to make light
for ourselves in the darkness. I just think it's beautiful
driving around and seeing all the lights for the holidays and
and shearing. Joy with my friends in different
religions, as we talk about how we're celebrating and creating
community and dig this, Season I really dig this season so let's
talk about you. Remember, we're talking about,
you are a genius, do you remember that?
Let me remind you, you are a genius.
You have a genius, I love and Liz Gilbert's book, big magic.
She talks about how we have changed from thinking, people
have the genius. Which is sort of like, in some
conceptualizations like a muse, that hangs out with them and
inspires them or they have a special gift and I love that
framing because rather than making it a permanent State,
like, you are a genius for you or are not the idea that you
have genius. You have aging as you have some
genius, Is more of a growth mindset.
It becomes not of question of. Well, was I born with a genius
or not? It's who, how can I create?
Or discover or reveal or find a genius in me?
So you have genius. So let's talk about living in
your zone of Genius. So we're digging back into gay
Hendricks, working Work, gay Hendricks is an author's,
ecologist and counselor and I am digging into his book, The Big
week, or your zone of genius and hear me now.
Believe me later. The world needs you are genius.
The world needs, you were Genius.
Because not only is your unique set of gifts precisely with the
community needs. You living a life that is
fulfilling and enjoyable and rich just makes you a better
person to be around. So let's talk about your zone of
Genius. Going to hear some papers
ruffling. All right so what gay Hendrix
recommends is to? First of all just make a
commitment to live in your zone of Genius.
I'm going to read directly from the book.
I invite you to make your commitment right at this moment,
make a private deal between you and the universe, a formal
commitment to living in your zone of Genius.
Here's a sentence. I use when working with people.
I commit to living in my zone of Genius.
Now and forever. Okay.
Repeat after me. I commit to living in my zone of
Genius now and forever. I commit to living in my zone of
Genius now and forever. Try writing that on your mirror,
put a reminder app on your phone, make it your Mantra when
you wake up in the morning and roll over, Smack That Alarm and
say to yourself, I commit to living in my zone of Genius now
and forever. I'm going to challenge you to do
that because there's something super powerful about a
commitment. It means that you are reminded
one that you have is a man of genius.
And To that, you're going to choose it of your own free will
as actively as possible in every moment.
So the big question that comes up is what is my zone of Genius.
As well, here are some questions and these are going to sound
familiar and I've had a conversation like this with
several of my friends. Especially my psychotherapist
friends recently about how once you start drilling down into all
these various spiritual traditions and psychotherapeutic
modalities. They all start to kind of feel a
little similar. They start to like well that's
just kind of like this and like that.
Yeah. And in my opinion it's because
there are only so many ways to hack the human heart.
There are only so many ways to hack the human brain you know we
can come at it from any number of directions but ultimately
we're all made of the same stuff, mind-body feelings Spirit
and the operating system may be complex but it is not infinite.
So So, these questions may sound familiar and I invite you to
bring a beginner's mind to them. Pretend like you have never
heard them before. All of my preconceived notions.
I have about what my zone of Genius is.
I now destroy and uncreate. Will you destroy and uncreate
all of your preconceived? Notions about what your Genius
is. That's right?
You see ya? And here we go.
So now that you've decided heck yeah I want the zone of Genius
stuff. I want my life to live, like I
want to live my life like it's magic.
I want to do things that feel like a flow State.
I want to be a huge contribution to my self, my family and the
world. Let's do it.
Here's the first genius question.
What do I most love to do? As in I love it so much.
I can do it for long stretches of time without getting tired.
What do you most love to do? You love it so much you can do
it for long stretches of time without getting tired or bored.
Feel free to pause the recording right now and do a custom take
some quick notes. I don't grab out your phone and
do a quick little voice memo. Now, what's lovely about this
question is that your answer will be pretty specific and
unique to you. Not brutally honest, be
completely unjust. Mentally honest with yourself,
no matter what it is. That's not your final answer.
There will be more questions. So if you're somewhere in the
realm of things that you don't think matter like of that
judgment and answer the question, what do you most love
to do? What do you love so much?
You can do for long stretches of time without getting tired or
bored? Okay, similar but not exactly
the same. What work do?
I do? That doesn't seem like work.
I can do it all day long, without ever feeling tired or
bored. What work do you do, that?
Doesn't seem like work. What can you do all day long
without feeling tired or bored? It's the kind of thing that when
you're doing it you're like this is why I do the work that I do.
It's when you just get into it and it feels so rewarding.
And if you have a day where this is what you do, most of you feel
perhaps tired but not depleted. It might be that thing that
gives you more energy when you do it.
What work do you do? That you can just lose track of
time. Okay, recycling in on some good
stuff here. Question.
Number three from gay Hendrix in my work.
What produces the highest ratio of abundance and satisfaction to
amount of time spent? For example even if I only do 10
seconds or a few minutes of it and idea or a deeper connection,
May spring forth that leads to huge value in your work.
What produces the highest ratio of abundance and satisfaction to
amount of time spent? Even if you only do a few
seconds or a few minutes of it and idea or a deeper connection,
May spring for that leads, to huge value for a lot of people
throughout history, if you get into biography, the answer to
that question is going to be go for a walk.
A lot of great thinkers and scientists are notorious for
going for long walks. That is often an answer for many
people. It may not be your answer but I
want to share that as a way to get your ideas going.
It might be you know sometimes I get a lot of value from just
being very still and staring off into space.
Not even necessarily meditating just allowing my mind to not be
focused on anything in particular.
And when I spend time doing that, I noticed that
Inspirations connections ideas, begin to spring forward in a way
that is completely out of proportion to the amount of
time. It gave myself permission to do
that, and sometimes you have to be ruthless about protecting
what that is. You got to be ruthless about
projecting with that is. If that thing is your writing,
if it's your art is your creativity, you want to just
really be super honest with in your work what produces the
highest ratio of abundance and satisfaction and dissatisfaction
don't get stuck on the abundance thing.
Making cold calls may make you the most money, but if it's not
also satisfying, it isn't the answer to this question?
My work who produces the highest ratio of abundance and
satisfaction to amount of time, spent spoiler alert Lily.
You want to start figuring out how to offload the things that
are not the answer to that question.
All right, so moving on, Even pausing and taking notes, listen
to the episode again. Go back pain.
Stick nodes. What is my unique ability?
What is your unique ability? There's a special skill.
You are gifted with Yes, there is.
Yes, you this unique ability fully realized and put to work.
Can provide enormous benefits to you and any organization you
serve. This one is hard for people.
My very first coach, shout out
to you. Erin called it called it, your
superpower. This is genius, this unique
genius. In fact, the the course that he
that he used to teach is called your unique genius, Discovery,
unique genius Discovery. And the reason why it's hard is
because this there's something about this, which is just so
It's so just like, well yeah, it's in that zone of doesn't
everybody know how to do that or it's something that your
culture, or your upbringing hasn't taught you to Value.
I remember reading a book years and years ago about this woman,
who embedded with an indigenous community in Australia and one
of the women's one of the woman's role in that Community
was to listen. Her unique genius was to listen.
And in that particular Community, they value that right
there were other people who were good at procuring food making
baskets, doing this other stuff, her genius was to listen and so
the other members of the community would go to her with
great reverence, in order to have someone deeply, hear them.
So what is your unique ability? So, he gave uses this idea of a
Russian doll, you know, it's those little dolls where there's
like a big doll me up. The big doll, a little Tommy of
little time, just a little and ticket, is, he's a bit?
A teeny tiny little doll. So your unique genius, may be
camouflaged inside a larger skill, so you might not realize
that your unique ability is what is driving your success in
applying that larger skill. So I'm going to use As example
here, he says, for example, I didn't learn about my unique
ability to well into my 30s. I have been using it all along,
but it was like water to a fish. I had taken it so much for
granted that I didn't know. It was a definable skill that
could be described and refined all right, so You have a skill
that is your unique genius and you're probably using it, but
it's like that little, is that little baby doll inside the
other big tall's, you definitely.
Don't know. I'm sorry, I got distracted.
The you may not have noticed yet.
What is that? Colonel that essential Colonel.
So gay is talking about how he knew was since he was a kid that
he loved to help people solve problems.
So his unique ability occurs within the larger skill of
helping people solve problems. The best way.
I can describe it is that I can be with people in a certain way
that enables them to come up with Creative Solutions, they
hadn't thought of before. So, I have two people in my
personal life, who have this particular skill, their
particular skill is to be with other people and help them
ideate, until they come up with something.
Amazing has a that is a marketable skill, my friends,
they didn't realize that that was her skill for a while
because it was in the context of all this other problem solving,
but the unique skill is I can be with you in a way that causes
you to come up with a beautiful solution to a problem that
you're struggling with. So he gives another example to
help out. I'm like I'm leaning heavily on
gay Hendrix because it's better or his words are better than
mine. So, he talks about a CEO that he
was working with, and he asked her about her unique ability and
she said running meetings That's the outermost Russian doll and
he said well when you're running meetings, and what is, what is
it that you're doing? When you're at your best?
She said, knowing when and how to gracefully cut off a
discussion discussion and move along.
He asks, what gives you the ability to know when to do that?
And she paused and said, I never thought about it before, but I
feel an energy shift in the room.
And inside me something shifts in the room and I know it's time
to move on. We move forward.
Now that I think about it. She said I've been able to do
that since I was a kid so her unique ability came from her
troubled childhood and being able to feel the shift.
Shift in her parents energy, and figure out what to do about it.
So, finally gave reflected back to her.
You have an ability to feel a certain kind of energy shift in
the room and then and inside you and tuning into this energy
helps, you know what to do. Okay.
So I hope these examples are helpful and there might be value
and getting together with a trusted other and just asking
each other. These questions.
So to use gaze example, okay? Take the first answer that the
person gives you are you give yourself and saying, okay?
Well what about that? What about that?
It's a similar exercise to the five Wise.
It's a process that I lead some of my clients through when I
say, what would you like? And they have an answer.
I'm like, well, why is that important?
Because of this. Why is that important?
Because of this getting down to your unique, genius, maybe the
same way. What are you good at?
I'm good at organizing parties. Well, what about organizing
parties is especially, are you especially good at?
I'm, especially good at coordinating.
The all of those different vendors.
Well, what about coordinating the vendors?
Are you especially good at the part where I know who does what
first aha. Now you're getting somewhere.
This episode is long. I hope this is helpful.
The thing I think is the most important, if you take away,
nothing else. Commit to living in your zone of
genius and as you go through your day, notice notice, when
you're in that flow State, when you're doing something, and you
lose track of time, you think to yourself, oh, I could do this
all day. When you think to yourself, This
is what I came to. This is what I showed up for.
This is why I do what I do. Keep your heart, your ears,
you're in your eyes peeled for that.
My other suggestion is start to notice what people come to you
for. Now, this one's tricky because
it could be your zone of Excellence.
People are used to coming to you for your zone of Excellence.
They come to rely on you so that one's a little tricky.
But, you know, pay attention, and then pay attention to those
moments when you're like, Love this.
And get really curious about the details.
This is a lot. I just I love this whole body of
work from him. I just loved it and I really
needed it. I really needed it.
I've noticed some unfolding in myself over this last year
especially these last couple of months have been an accelerated
change your, from a lot of people that they feel like time
is speeding up. And so remembering that living
at our zone of Genius, is not selfish.
But rather is, in fact, not only the best gift that we can give
ourselves. It is the best gift we can.
Everyone with whom we interact, and if you have young people in
your life, you can Inspire them to skip over some of the hard
parts and go directly to leaning into their zone of Genius, so
they don't have to reinvent the wheel and make the same mistakes
that we made. All right?
Thank you for being here. I mean, especially you, because
you're so magnificent. I mean, the way you do the
things you do, So impressive and you're good looking too.
Your whole you are perfect. You are complete.
You are worthy of thriving. You are worthy and deserving of
a life, so freaking fantastic. That it surprises.
Even you until next time, I am so honored that you share time
with me. If you've listened this far,
then something here was a value to you.
Would you please be a friend of the podcast and share it with at
least one other person? The podcast is available on most
platforms including YouTube and I need your help to get the word
out. So please like, subscribe, and
share, and a five star review on iTunes would be Wow.
Chef's kiss. Thank you so much.
See you next time. Wow.
Chef's kiss. Thank you so much.
See you next time.