1
00:00:05,120 --> 00:00:09,160
Hello beautiful humans, and 
welcome to the Mental Wellness 

2
00:00:09,160 --> 00:00:13,400
Wake Up Show, a weekly podcast 
where growthminded, creative 

3
00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:17,600
people come to learn best 
practices from both spirituality

4
00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:21,440
and psychology that create 
lasting wellbeing. 

5
00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:25,880
I am your host, mental Wellness 
expert, improvised acting 

6
00:00:25,880 --> 00:00:28,920
teacher, therapist, and coach 
Dawn McMillan. 

7
00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:32,200
Let's get to it. 
Hello. 

8
00:00:32,439 --> 00:00:35,760
Hello. 
I'm so glad you're here. 

9
00:00:37,440 --> 00:00:40,600
Thanks for being here. 
Welcome back. 

10
00:00:40,600 --> 00:00:44,800
If you're returning listener, I 
value you so much. 

11
00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:48,120
Your time is precious, and I 
love that you are spending it 

12
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:50,880
here with me. 
It is an honor and a privilege 

13
00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:52,960
to be in your company. 
So thank you. 

14
00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:56,760
And if you're here for the first
time, yay. 

15
00:00:57,160 --> 00:01:00,490
Thanks for coming around. 
So we are in the midst of an 

16
00:01:00,490 --> 00:01:03,970
Enniogram series. 
Enniogram is a wisdom system 

17
00:01:04,290 --> 00:01:08,890
with 9 primary points and is 
normally used as a personality 

18
00:01:08,890 --> 00:01:11,170
typing system. 
So if you're here for the first 

19
00:01:11,170 --> 00:01:14,890
time, go ahead and hop on back, 
catch up with us. 

20
00:01:15,050 --> 00:01:20,810
We are now on Enniogram 3, which
shockingly is not the third one 

21
00:01:21,210 --> 00:01:24,090
because we actually started 
elsewhere on the cycle. 

22
00:01:24,450 --> 00:01:27,770
So let's jump right in. 
And for those of you who are 

23
00:01:27,890 --> 00:01:32,280
leaving, come on back and join 
us on Enneagram 3. 

24
00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:37,360
So as you'll recall, the 
Enneagram is a circle with 9 

25
00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:41,320
points on it that are 
interrelated by lines and the 

26
00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:46,240
enneagrams 2-3 and four are 
clustered together. 

27
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:50,280
And what we call the heart 
center, the emotional center, 

28
00:01:51,170 --> 00:01:54,850
these are people who are 
motivated by and kind of lead 

29
00:01:54,850 --> 00:01:58,770
with how they feel. 
Not like that sort of gut body 

30
00:01:58,770 --> 00:02:01,010
feeling, but more like that 
emotional feeling. 

31
00:02:01,810 --> 00:02:05,690
So what does that mean for our 
enneogram threes? 

32
00:02:05,690 --> 00:02:07,490
So what do we call the enneogram
threes? 

33
00:02:07,690 --> 00:02:12,210
Oh, and I will be shuffling 
papers around And my keyboard, I

34
00:02:12,250 --> 00:02:15,650
have a cool gamer keyboard 
because I'm cool like that. 

35
00:02:16,010 --> 00:02:19,010
I am not cool. 
So what do we call the 

36
00:02:19,010 --> 00:02:23,820
Enneograms? 
Enneogram 3 are the achiever, 

37
00:02:24,140 --> 00:02:29,180
the motivator, the role model, 
the paragon, the communicator, 

38
00:02:29,260 --> 00:02:34,980
the status seeker, the best. 
If the enniogram three was a 

39
00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:37,060
country, it would be the United 
States. 

40
00:02:37,260 --> 00:02:40,340
When I think of the Enniogram 3,
I'm thinking about someone like 

41
00:02:40,340 --> 00:02:43,060
Tony Robbins. 
I'm thinking about that that 

42
00:02:44,750 --> 00:02:49,350
that, that personal trainer, 
that inspirational speaker, that

43
00:02:49,350 --> 00:02:55,030
person who really has that, I 
don't know, like like you would 

44
00:02:55,350 --> 00:02:58,390
that leadership thing where 
you're like, I will follow you. 

45
00:02:59,430 --> 00:03:07,030
So threes at their best, are 
optimistic, confident, 

46
00:03:07,790 --> 00:03:13,830
industrious, efficient, 
selfpropelled, energetic, 

47
00:03:14,590 --> 00:03:19,990
practical, shadow side, because 
everybody's got one. 

48
00:03:20,630 --> 00:03:26,550
Threes at their worst are 
deceptive, narcissistic, 

49
00:03:27,310 --> 00:03:35,950
pretentious, vain, superficial, 
vindictive, overly competitive. 

50
00:03:36,510 --> 00:03:40,110
Threes are motivated by the need
to be productive, achieve 

51
00:03:40,110 --> 00:03:47,950
success and avoid failure, and 
avoid failure and avoid failure.

52
00:03:49,350 --> 00:03:53,910
So threes are very much 
interested not just in being 

53
00:03:53,910 --> 00:03:56,750
successful, but being perceived 
as successful. 

54
00:03:56,750 --> 00:03:58,990
They like for their success to 
show. 

55
00:03:59,990 --> 00:04:04,950
So let's talk a little bit more 
about about the anagram. 3. 

56
00:04:04,950 --> 00:04:10,590
So the basic, the the threes 
basic fear is of being worthless

57
00:04:10,590 --> 00:04:16,310
without value, being worthless 
or without value apart from 

58
00:04:16,310 --> 00:04:19,029
their achievements. 
So remember we said that twos, 

59
00:04:19,029 --> 00:04:22,990
threes and fours are the feeling
center and they're they can be 

60
00:04:22,990 --> 00:04:25,710
seen as being characterized by 
their relationship to shame. 

61
00:04:26,470 --> 00:04:30,270
So the way that threes deal with
that, that secret fear that 

62
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:35,390
they're worthless or unlovable 
in some way is to achieve is to 

63
00:04:35,430 --> 00:04:38,750
achieve. 
You can imagine the people who 

64
00:04:39,350 --> 00:04:43,760
were raised in an environment 
where they only got validated by

65
00:04:43,760 --> 00:04:47,720
their environment for being 
really good at sports or getting

66
00:04:47,720 --> 00:04:51,800
good grades or being pretty or, 
you know, it's their 

67
00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:54,280
achievements are what matter, 
not who they are as a person. 

68
00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:57,560
So I don't want to get too much 
into how people become the way 

69
00:04:57,560 --> 00:05:00,720
that they are, because honestly,
the answer really is just 

70
00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:04,360
because it's nature. 
It's nurture, it's biological, 

71
00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:07,560
it's social, bio psycho, it's 
psychological. 

72
00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:14,880
But so the basic fear behind the
personality type of three is of 

73
00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:18,840
being worthless and people not 
valuing them for anything other 

74
00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:24,040
than their achievements. 
The basic desire is to feel 

75
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:27,760
worthwhile, accepted, and 
desirable. 

76
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:32,120
And what it's not listed in this
Reso Hudson little blurb is to 

77
00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:37,440
be to feel worthwhile, accepted 
and desirable for who they are, 

78
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:39,400
not for what they have 
accomplished. 

79
00:05:40,620 --> 00:05:46,980
They're super ego message you 
are good or okay as long as you 

80
00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:49,940
are successful and others think 
well of you. 

81
00:05:51,380 --> 00:05:54,380
So you can see the trap there. 
You can see the trap there 

82
00:05:54,380 --> 00:05:56,580
because as long as others think 
well of you. 

83
00:05:57,260 --> 00:06:01,180
So for a three who's you know in
the in the midst of this 

84
00:06:01,180 --> 00:06:04,260
personality type of this 
archetype, it's not enough to be

85
00:06:04,260 --> 00:06:06,870
successful. 
That success has to be known. 

86
00:06:06,910 --> 00:06:09,350
Other people also have to think 
well of you. 

87
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:13,150
And so a three is going to be 
drawn to a high high prestige 

88
00:06:13,350 --> 00:06:16,550
careers. 
The threes are not the kind to 

89
00:06:16,550 --> 00:06:19,430
work quietly behind the scenes 
changing the world. 

90
00:06:19,590 --> 00:06:22,310
They're going to be out front 
changing the world. 

91
00:06:23,830 --> 00:06:29,030
Let's take a look at some levels
of three so we can know how this

92
00:06:29,030 --> 00:06:31,950
might operate in our friends, 
loved ones, and in ourselves. 

93
00:06:32,630 --> 00:06:38,120
OK, so any anyagram is just all 
kinds of groups of three. 

94
00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:40,600
Three groups of three in any 
number of ways. 

95
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:43,240
It's insane. 
All the ways you can divide the 

96
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:48,600
anyagram up into threes. 
So 9 levels of the nine types. 

97
00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:55,520
So level 9, a very unhealthy 
anaiagram. 3 is going to be 

98
00:06:55,800 --> 00:07:03,030
monomaniacal, relentless mono, 
meaning one so unhealthy. 

99
00:07:03,030 --> 00:07:06,670
Threes feel that there is 
nothing they can do to win the 

100
00:07:06,670 --> 00:07:10,150
positive attention of the people
whose approval they need, and 

101
00:07:10,150 --> 00:07:13,550
may lose control of their 
repressed hostility and rage. 

102
00:07:14,070 --> 00:07:18,510
They may seek revenge on real or
imagined tormentors, attempting 

103
00:07:18,510 --> 00:07:21,790
to bring down whoever they feel 
has rejected them. 

104
00:07:22,630 --> 00:07:25,390
So this is someone who's given 
up hope. 

105
00:07:26,030 --> 00:07:27,910
They would desperately want 
approval, but they don't think 

106
00:07:27,910 --> 00:07:30,710
there's anything that they can 
do to get it. 

107
00:07:31,820 --> 00:07:36,140
So they can be very dangerous. 
Level 8, so we're getting a 

108
00:07:36,140 --> 00:07:41,380
little bit healthier on level 8.
An eogram 3 May present as 

109
00:07:41,380 --> 00:07:45,100
duplicitous. 
That means they lie and 

110
00:07:45,100 --> 00:07:48,220
opportunistic. 
So unhealthy threes have become 

111
00:07:48,220 --> 00:07:53,060
so desperate for attention that 
they will concoct any story or 

112
00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:57,820
scheme in order to cover over 
their deterioration. 

113
00:07:58,750 --> 00:08:02,590
They do not want anyone to know 
how troubled they are and are 

114
00:08:02,590 --> 00:08:06,350
willing to go to great lengths 
to keep their emotional illness 

115
00:08:06,790 --> 00:08:10,430
and misdeeds higged in. 
They're willing to go to great 

116
00:08:10,430 --> 00:08:14,830
lengths to keep their emotional 
illness and were misdeeds 

117
00:08:14,830 --> 00:08:17,670
hidden. 
Remember the whole Enron scandal

118
00:08:18,110 --> 00:08:23,270
where people were lying and 
cheating that you can think of 

119
00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:26,590
that as sort of a level 8 and 
eargram 3 type behavior. 

120
00:08:27,730 --> 00:08:30,890
K level 7 getting a little 
healthier at this level. 

121
00:08:31,050 --> 00:08:34,450
The anygram 3 is going to 
present as unprincipled and 

122
00:08:34,450 --> 00:08:37,409
deceptive. 
Threes fear that they are 

123
00:08:37,409 --> 00:08:41,490
failing and that their claims 
may be empty and fraudulent, 

124
00:08:41,809 --> 00:08:45,890
which may be true. 
To save their self-image they 

125
00:08:45,890 --> 00:08:50,410
begin to deceive themselves and 
others saying whatever will 

126
00:08:50,410 --> 00:08:54,490
impress people or get them off 
the hook inside. 

127
00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:59,120
They feel empty and depressed. 
So it's a little bit like that 

128
00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:06,000
any or gram two people pleasing 
instinct or impulse but rather 

129
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,600
that where that any or gram two 
people pleasing is to be liked, 

130
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:11,920
this is to be impressive. 
They want people to to be 

131
00:09:11,920 --> 00:09:14,720
impressed by them. 
So then we move up into sort of 

132
00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:17,120
average. 
So you know the the last three 

133
00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:19,720
levels are people who are really
disturbed, really traumatized, 

134
00:09:19,720 --> 00:09:22,760
really hurting, and then we get 
to sort of your average person 

135
00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:24,560
who's you know, making it 
through life. 

136
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:27,560
All right. 
So level 6 in eogram 3 is going 

137
00:09:27,560 --> 00:09:33,200
to be self promoting and 
grandiose threes are afraid that

138
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:37,600
others will not notice them 
unless they are hugely 

139
00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:42,200
successful or outstanding. 
Thus they try to convince 

140
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:45,520
themselves and others of the 
reality of their grandiose 

141
00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:48,120
claims. 
They are self promoting, 

142
00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:54,160
competitive and arrogant as a 
defense against secret 

143
00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:56,770
neediness. 
Grandiose. 

144
00:09:57,450 --> 00:10:00,850
Grandiose. 
Are you hearing narcissistic 

145
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,010
characteristics? 
Yes you are. 

146
00:10:03,810 --> 00:10:06,250
Sidebar, Stop calling everyone a
narcissist. 

147
00:10:06,330 --> 00:10:08,810
There are all kinds of ways to 
be self-centered without being a

148
00:10:08,810 --> 00:10:11,210
narcissist. 
Narcissistic personality 

149
00:10:11,210 --> 00:10:15,450
disorder is actually very rare. 
OK, and a sidebar. 

150
00:10:16,130 --> 00:10:20,730
OK, so that's a level 6 self 
promoting grandiose, moving up a

151
00:10:20,730 --> 00:10:23,570
little bit. 
In our average Level 3 to a 

152
00:10:23,570 --> 00:10:28,420
level 5, this person's going to 
present as image, image 

153
00:10:28,420 --> 00:10:33,140
conscious and expedient. 
Threes worry that they will lose

154
00:10:33,140 --> 00:10:37,620
the positive regard of others, 
so they wish to impress people. 

155
00:10:38,580 --> 00:10:41,660
They strive to cultivate what 
they believe will be the most 

156
00:10:41,660 --> 00:10:45,540
attractive image possible. 
Ambitious but selfdoubting. 

157
00:10:45,900 --> 00:10:48,420
They want to be admired and 
desired. 

158
00:10:48,420 --> 00:10:50,540
They typically have intimacy 
problems. 

159
00:10:50,940 --> 00:10:54,390
So in AGRAM, threes in general, 
they're going to, they're going 

160
00:10:54,390 --> 00:10:56,510
to show their success, they're 
going to show that they've got 

161
00:10:56,510 --> 00:10:59,150
it going on. 
So you can imagine someone who 

162
00:10:59,390 --> 00:11:02,110
spends a little at this level, 
who spends a little bit extra on

163
00:11:02,110 --> 00:11:06,270
the sports car or the luxury 
model of the car, because they 

164
00:11:06,270 --> 00:11:10,990
want people that even drive by 
them to be impressed by them, to

165
00:11:10,990 --> 00:11:13,870
know that they they are 
successful and they're really 

166
00:11:13,870 --> 00:11:19,070
ambitious. 
They work hard, but secretly 

167
00:11:19,070 --> 00:11:22,810
they're doubting themselves. 
So we move up a little bit in 

168
00:11:22,810 --> 00:11:28,250
our emotional health Level 4 
successoriented and performing. 

169
00:11:29,690 --> 00:11:33,090
So threes begin to fear that 
they will be overshadowed by the

170
00:11:33,090 --> 00:11:37,130
accomplishments of others, that 
their efforts will not bring 

171
00:11:37,130 --> 00:11:40,650
them the attention they desire. 
So you hear that little edge of 

172
00:11:40,650 --> 00:11:44,570
competitiveness. 
So thus they need to distinguish

173
00:11:44,570 --> 00:11:47,570
themselves from others by 
overachieving. 

174
00:11:47,930 --> 00:11:52,240
They continually Dr. themselves 
to achieve more. 

175
00:11:52,520 --> 00:11:55,440
So right now I'm thinking about 
the characterization of 

176
00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:59,080
Alexander Hamilton in the 
musical Hamilton right? 

177
00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:01,960
They describe him as relentless,
never stopping nonstop. 

178
00:12:02,560 --> 00:12:05,880
So in order to make sure that 
they are as successful as 

179
00:12:05,880 --> 00:12:10,680
they're supposed to be, they 
just over overwork. 

180
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:14,600
They overstrive. 
They continually Dr. themselves 

181
00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:19,800
to achieve more. 
This is the person with, I don't

182
00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:27,120
know, the Nobel Prize and a 
Booker award and a MacArthur 

183
00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:29,640
genius grant and gosh, only 
knows what else, right? 

184
00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:32,680
So these are striving mixed 
driver stints. 

185
00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:40,000
OK, so let's move up a little 
bit to the healthier expression 

186
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:45,520
of this Level 3 archetype. 
So Level 3 and Aagram three. 

187
00:12:46,080 --> 00:12:50,150
Goal oriented, self improving 
threes reinforce their 

188
00:12:50,150 --> 00:12:53,310
self-image by developing 
themselves and their talents. 

189
00:12:53,670 --> 00:12:57,590
They are competent, confident 
and persistent, becoming 

190
00:12:57,590 --> 00:13:00,990
exemplary and whatever they do, 
effective communicators. 

191
00:13:01,270 --> 00:13:05,270
They are often popular role 
model role models and 

192
00:13:05,310 --> 00:13:08,470
inspirations to others. 
So these at this level people 

193
00:13:08,470 --> 00:13:10,990
are a little healthier. 
They're not driven. 

194
00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:16,130
They're not continually driven, 
but they do continually work to 

195
00:13:16,130 --> 00:13:18,610
improve themselves and to 
develop their talents, right? 

196
00:13:18,610 --> 00:13:21,010
They're practicing their 
instrument every day. 

197
00:13:21,010 --> 00:13:25,410
They're effective communicators.
You know, these are the people 

198
00:13:25,410 --> 00:13:27,890
in your organization or in your 
friend group where you're just 

199
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:30,090
like, ah, that person's really 
got it going on. 

200
00:13:30,690 --> 00:13:33,730
And a healthy Level 3. 
They they really, they really 

201
00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:35,970
got it going on. 
They really are using their 

202
00:13:35,970 --> 00:13:37,970
talents in a way that is visible
to others. 

203
00:13:38,530 --> 00:13:41,770
So they're competent, confident 
and persistent. 

204
00:13:42,650 --> 00:13:46,890
Moving up a level 2. 
At this level, an NA gram 3 is 

205
00:13:46,890 --> 00:13:50,170
going to present as adaptable 
and admirable. 

206
00:13:52,450 --> 00:13:56,450
Threes are attuned to what 
others value and adapt 

207
00:13:56,450 --> 00:13:59,730
themselves to become a person 
who would be more valuable. 

208
00:14:00,130 --> 00:14:04,010
self-image. 
I am outstanding, capable and 

209
00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:06,810
well adjusted with unlimited 
potential. 

210
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:10,840
So here's a little threes can be
a little chameleon like, right? 

211
00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:13,600
Because they threes are are 
often the kind of people who are

212
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:16,360
good at a lot of things. 
And because they value being 

213
00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:20,640
that perception of success, like
they they they really appreciate

214
00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:24,120
being admired. 
They may lean into those 

215
00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:27,440
particular talents of the of 
theirs that are the most valued.

216
00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:33,360
You think about someone who is 
equally good at football and 

217
00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:35,880
baseball. 
They might lean into their 

218
00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:38,620
football career because it's 
higher status. 

219
00:14:38,740 --> 00:14:40,340
Is that true? 
I guess it depends on where you 

220
00:14:40,340 --> 00:14:42,180
hang out, but you know what I'm 
saying, right? 

221
00:14:42,340 --> 00:14:46,180
So they may be equally good at 
creative writing and biology. 

222
00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:49,260
And depending on their family of
origin, they may lean into the 

223
00:14:49,260 --> 00:14:51,340
biology because their family 
likes the sciences more. 

224
00:14:52,020 --> 00:14:55,540
Something like that and a level 
1. 

225
00:14:55,700 --> 00:14:59,620
So a highly emotionally healthy,
well integrated NA gram three, 

226
00:15:00,220 --> 00:15:03,380
you're going to see them as 
inner, directed and authentic. 

227
00:15:04,740 --> 00:15:09,100
So these threes, this archetype 
of the three, let they let go of

228
00:15:09,100 --> 00:15:13,500
the belief that their value is 
dependent on the positive regard

229
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:18,180
of others, thus freeing them to 
discover their true identity and

230
00:15:18,180 --> 00:15:22,460
their own heart's desire. 
So while all aneograms really 

231
00:15:22,460 --> 00:15:25,380
get some juice out of being 
admired by other people, like it

232
00:15:25,380 --> 00:15:27,900
really is like a vital nutrient 
to them. 

233
00:15:28,020 --> 00:15:29,660
It's a it's like a vitamin 
really. 

234
00:15:29,660 --> 00:15:33,020
It really feeds them when that 
when a three gets very well 

235
00:15:33,020 --> 00:15:39,340
nourished and well evolved and 
well integrated, they know they 

236
00:15:39,340 --> 00:15:41,020
appreciate it. 
They still love the admiration, 

237
00:15:41,060 --> 00:15:45,060
but they know that their value 
is not, that is not their value.

238
00:15:45,420 --> 00:15:48,900
The positive regard of others 
does not determine their value. 

239
00:15:50,140 --> 00:15:52,100
So they get their basic desire 
achieved. 

240
00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:57,100
They feel valuable and 
worthwhile but they're not 

241
00:15:57,100 --> 00:15:59,660
needing it from other people if 
that makes sense. 

242
00:16:00,230 --> 00:16:04,990
So they become self accepting, 
genuine and benevolent. 

243
00:16:05,790 --> 00:16:11,190
So if you know these high 
achievers you probably know and 

244
00:16:11,190 --> 00:16:15,110
any a gram 3 because they're so 
high achieving right any a gram 

245
00:16:15,110 --> 00:16:17,590
threes they're like at the 
they're they're at the top of 

246
00:16:17,590 --> 00:16:20,430
the grade they're they're 
they're they're out there doing 

247
00:16:20,430 --> 00:16:24,630
the thing very, very visibly. 
They they have Ted talks, right.

248
00:16:24,630 --> 00:16:27,430
They're out there you see them 
you see their success. 

249
00:16:27,430 --> 00:16:29,800
They're well dressed, they're 
well dressed. 

250
00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:31,320
They're well groomed, They're 
well put together. 

251
00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:34,440
They got the nice car. 
They've they've got all the 

252
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,640
letters after their name. 
You know, I have one friend that

253
00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:40,440
I tease like about all the 
letters she has after her name. 

254
00:16:40,440 --> 00:16:42,240
And she's like, that's not even 
all of them. 

255
00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:46,240
So, you know, any Agram threes 
are are noticeable. 

256
00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:49,360
And when you're around in any 
Agram 3, there's just that they 

257
00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:54,400
just have this inner fire that 
that makes you like think, oh, I

258
00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:57,830
can get out there and do stuff 
right when they're on stage, 

259
00:16:57,830 --> 00:17:01,350
when they're that inspirational 
speaker, like you know, you're 

260
00:17:01,350 --> 00:17:04,630
like afterwards like, I'm going 
to go out there and I'm going to

261
00:17:04,630 --> 00:17:08,349
make stuff happen. 
Super inspiring, super 

262
00:17:08,349 --> 00:17:10,510
inspiring. 
And when you get a really well 

263
00:17:10,510 --> 00:17:12,950
integrated and air Gram 3, 
they're so comfortable in their 

264
00:17:12,950 --> 00:17:15,550
own skin, right? 
Like, so they're just sort of 

265
00:17:15,550 --> 00:17:17,869
casually wandering around in 
their designer clothes, in their

266
00:17:17,869 --> 00:17:20,349
mansions. 
If that's the level of the type 

267
00:17:20,349 --> 00:17:22,150
of success that they're 
choosing, they might be 

268
00:17:22,150 --> 00:17:26,819
wandering around in their their 
monk's robes, in their sanctuary

269
00:17:26,819 --> 00:17:31,660
or whatever personal type of 
achievement there at the You get

270
00:17:31,660 --> 00:17:32,460
it. 
I'm going to stop giving 

271
00:17:32,460 --> 00:17:34,860
examples. 
And when you're around them, 

272
00:17:35,300 --> 00:17:41,340
they're so just like, admirable.
They're so admirable that you 

273
00:17:41,340 --> 00:17:45,140
catch that fire a little bit and
you're like, I can achieve 

274
00:17:45,140 --> 00:17:47,940
things, I want to achieve 
things, I can achieve things. 

275
00:17:48,100 --> 00:17:49,980
That seems cool. 
That seems possible. 

276
00:17:51,260 --> 00:17:56,400
So are any of Gram threes. 
Like, like I said, every every 

277
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,320
group needs at least one of 
every kind of person. 

278
00:17:58,320 --> 00:18:01,800
So your Annagram 3 is going to 
get things done and look good 

279
00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:05,800
while they're doing it. 
Like the the image that just 

280
00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:10,640
came to me is like, you know 
that that ballet dancer who's 

281
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:15,600
like standing on one leg and 
point, and her other leg is 

282
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:18,080
pointing straight up at the sky 
and she just stands there 

283
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:21,400
perfectly still for like 5 
minutes and makes it look 

284
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:23,080
effortless and graceful and 
easy. 

285
00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:27,580
That's Annagram 3. 
They make they look good, 

286
00:18:28,100 --> 00:18:32,660
they're doing well, and they 
inspire you to do the same. 

287
00:18:33,660 --> 00:18:38,460
So if you have an anagram 3 in 
your life, model them. 

288
00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:41,780
Model them. 
How are they doing what they do?

289
00:18:42,020 --> 00:18:46,340
Because they have figured out 
how to fit into a niche in a way

290
00:18:46,340 --> 00:18:49,140
that is highly valuable. 
They're, they're they're people 

291
00:18:49,140 --> 00:18:53,020
to model threes at their best 
are optimistic, confident, 

292
00:18:53,500 --> 00:18:57,810
industrious, efficient, 
self-propelled, right. 

293
00:18:57,810 --> 00:18:59,370
You know how all those job 
offers are like? 

294
00:18:59,530 --> 00:19:02,050
Wanted, Self Starter, BLEB, BLEB
BLEB. 

295
00:19:02,650 --> 00:19:04,530
We're talking about that 
Annagram 3 vibe. 

296
00:19:05,250 --> 00:19:09,250
They are self-propelled, 
energetic and practical. 

297
00:19:10,930 --> 00:19:13,330
So one of the things that 
Annagram threes really need to 

298
00:19:13,330 --> 00:19:17,370
watch out for, give yourself a 
break. 

299
00:19:18,770 --> 00:19:20,570
It's okay to not be the best at 
everything. 

300
00:19:21,490 --> 00:19:24,170
And actually, it's okay not to 
be the best at anything. 

301
00:19:25,270 --> 00:19:29,590
Like for real, for real there. 
It's okay not to be the best. 

302
00:19:30,470 --> 00:19:34,390
It's okay not to be the best. 
It's okay to not drive yourself 

303
00:19:34,790 --> 00:19:39,110
all the time. 
You don't have to impress people

304
00:19:39,470 --> 00:19:45,150
all the time. 
You get to enjoy being you. 

305
00:19:47,510 --> 00:19:57,680
You get to enjoy being you, so 
maybe lighten up a little bit. 

306
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:02,320
Lighten up. 
Be kind to yourself. 

307
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,920
Lean into that authenticity. 
If you are leading into your 

308
00:20:05,920 --> 00:20:08,000
authenticity, you will do it 
better than everyone else. 

309
00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:12,080
Because if you're an anagram 3, 
you do everything better than 

310
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:14,120
everyone else. 
But yeah, just lighten up. 

311
00:20:14,120 --> 00:20:16,120
It's okay not to be the best. 
You don't have to be the best at

312
00:20:16,120 --> 00:20:17,280
everything. 
Because you know what? 

313
00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:21,840
If you can be vulnerable, if you
can give yourself grace. 

314
00:20:22,360 --> 00:20:26,960
You'll be surprised at how many 
people think you're amazing even

315
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:31,080
when you're not perfect, even 
when you're not the best, right?

316
00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:33,840
You can't. 
You can't. 

317
00:20:34,680 --> 00:20:37,760
And don't cheat to make it look 
good when you're not actually 

318
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:40,080
the best. 
That's another danger for any of

319
00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:43,920
gram threes. 
So for the rest of us, how can 

320
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:47,640
we appreciate the any of gram 
threes in our lives, right? 

321
00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:50,740
Because they're out there making
it look good, and they may be so

322
00:20:50,740 --> 00:20:52,700
good at making it look good that
you have no idea how hard 

323
00:20:52,700 --> 00:20:55,180
they're working. 
So if you have someone who's a 

324
00:20:55,180 --> 00:20:58,180
striver and a pusher and a 
grinder, maybe the gift you can 

325
00:20:58,180 --> 00:21:02,100
give them is letting them know 
that your appreciation of them 

326
00:21:02,460 --> 00:21:05,860
is not about that. 
Your appreciation is not about 

327
00:21:05,860 --> 00:21:10,140
the car or the award or the 
whatever else it is that they're

328
00:21:10,140 --> 00:21:13,340
doing to mark their achievement.
You can let them know how much 

329
00:21:13,340 --> 00:21:17,510
you appreciate them for, I don't
know their sense of humor or the

330
00:21:17,510 --> 00:21:20,790
great hugs they give or whatever
other values that they have. 

331
00:21:21,350 --> 00:21:26,190
And then for those of us who 
aren't in here grand threes, how

332
00:21:26,190 --> 00:21:29,870
can we get that inspirational 
vibe going? 

333
00:21:29,870 --> 00:21:34,550
How can we be a just a little 
bit more selfpropelled? 

334
00:21:34,750 --> 00:21:37,230
How can we be a little bit more 
industrious? 

335
00:21:37,910 --> 00:21:41,470
How can we be a little more 
confident and a little more 

336
00:21:42,030 --> 00:21:44,470
optimistic? 
How can we bought brought bother

337
00:21:45,630 --> 00:21:47,630
and don't bother people hard or 
do It's up to you. 

338
00:21:47,910 --> 00:21:50,790
You're autonomous. 
How can we borrow that any 

339
00:21:50,790 --> 00:21:56,270
anagram 3 archetype to like go 
out there and do the thing. 

340
00:21:56,670 --> 00:22:00,190
Go do the thing, go do the 
thing, go do the thing your 

341
00:22:00,190 --> 00:22:03,430
heart is calling you to do. 
Bonus points if, like in any 

342
00:22:03,430 --> 00:22:06,550
anagram 3, you can make it look 
good, but the more important 

343
00:22:06,550 --> 00:22:10,230
thing is to go do the thing and 
know, Like any anagram threes, 

344
00:22:10,230 --> 00:22:12,950
when you get out there and you 
do the thing, you are quietly, 

345
00:22:12,950 --> 00:22:17,310
or maybe not so quietly, 
inspiring someone else to do the

346
00:22:17,310 --> 00:22:21,590
thing too. 
And if you're in any of gram 

347
00:22:21,870 --> 00:22:27,990
three, we see you, we see you, 
we see you, and we think you're 

348
00:22:27,990 --> 00:22:29,950
awesome. 
You know who else is awesome? 

349
00:22:30,070 --> 00:22:32,550
The rest of us. 
Because if there's one thing I 

350
00:22:32,550 --> 00:22:36,100
hope you're taking away from the
series, it's just how everyone 

351
00:22:36,100 --> 00:22:39,180
has these beautiful gifts to 
give to each other. 

352
00:22:39,500 --> 00:22:43,340
And that when we're all in our 
center, when we're all deeply in

353
00:22:43,540 --> 00:22:47,340
our gifts, we create this 
beautiful spectrum of of 

354
00:22:47,340 --> 00:22:50,580
perspectives and personality 
strengths that create this 

355
00:22:50,580 --> 00:22:53,700
gorgeous whole. 
And then, as we ourselves 

356
00:22:53,820 --> 00:22:58,000
integrate all of these different
types into ourselves, we become 

357
00:22:58,000 --> 00:23:02,320
the center of the circle, able 
to borrow from, lean into, and 

358
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:05,720
express all of these different 
facets of ourselves as the 

359
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:09,040
moment requires, while still 
being totally, truly authentic 

360
00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:12,400
to ourselves. 
And if you're like me, that 

361
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:14,760
sounds beautiful, really 
beautiful. 

362
00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:20,600
Have good news, by the way. 
You are are already beautiful. 

363
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:24,320
Wherever you find yourself on 
the anagram, wherever you find 

364
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:30,960
yourself on the emotional scale 
of maturity, you are whole, 

365
00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:33,360
perfect and complete. 
That's who you truly are. 

366
00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:36,920
That's who you truly are. 
When I read your anagram, type 

367
00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:39,280
like, I really integrated 
anagram type, blah blah, blah. 

368
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:43,720
That's that's the the tip of the
iceberg of who you truly are. 

369
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:49,160
And you, right here, right now, 
yesterday and tomorrow, you are 

370
00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:58,760
worthy and deserving of so much 
peace, so much fulfillment, so 

371
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:06,120
much enjoyment, so much freedom,
so much love and so much safety 

372
00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:11,320
that your mind can't even begin 
to imagine. 

373
00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:14,720
All right, I'm giving you a hug.
Yeah. 

374
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,320
Do you feel that? 
Did you feel that that was me 

375
00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:22,560
giving you a hug? 
All right, until next time, I am

376
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:24,880
so honored that you share time 
with me. 

377
00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:28,080
If you've listened this far, 
then something here was of value

378
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:30,160
to you. 
Would you please be a friend of 

379
00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:33,000
the podcast and share it with at
least one other person? 

380
00:24:33,360 --> 00:24:36,840
The podcast is available on most
platforms, including YouTube, 

381
00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,880
and I need your help to get the 
word out. 

382
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:42,400
So please, like, subscribe and 
share. 

383
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:47,440
And a five star review on iTunes
would be Chef's Kiss. 

384
00:24:48,280 --> 00:24:50,200
Thank you so much. 
See you next time.

