Welcome back to another episode of Look It Like a Lollipop.
This week I have a brand new guest who I just recently found
on social media, Alejandra, and she is a spiritual goddess.
She does spells, she does tarot, she does Oracle.
She also does a lot of horoscope readings.
So I'm excited and welcome. Thank you for having me.
I really appreciate the opportunity.
I'm excited. Yeah, this is so fun.
And honestly, I love connecting with people who I don't know
because it's like fresh information for my audience.
It's fresh information that, you know, sometimes we don't get to
share as much as like we get into a niche and I've been
guilty of that. And then you get stuck in like a
niche and you're there with your content or.
Your. Creation, you know.
I definitely relate to that because when I started my
TikTok, I strictly just wanted to post about tarot, like tarot
readings for the collective. You know, you see the tarot lady
on TikTok every time we scroll. Oh, if you see this, this is for
you. But I don't know.
As more time passes, I get interested in different topics
regarding spirituality, like shamanism specifically for me,
I'm very interested in that. So I'm trying to do that
eventually aliens, conspiracy theories, astrology, like all
kinds of stuff. So I don't want to just limit
myself. So funny you mentioned that.
My TikTok used to be called grounded Tarot when I first
started and then I changed my name to Ali the Oracle so that I
guess it fits my niche. Like I am the messenger no
matter what the message is, it's regarding something, but I'm the
just the bridge between spirit or source and US receiving the
message. You know, I love that so much
because I also relate to that. And I just followed you on
TikTok earlier because when TikTok like first came out, I
instantly like got 30,000 followers.
Like it was so easy. It was like first six months I
had 30,000 followers and I did likes and like it would happen
so quickly. And then I have been at 45,000
followers for fucking three years.
Like I have the wall and there is like no regard.
Like I have been at 1.9 million likes for three years.
Like I don't know what but I will be honest when we talk
about niches. Everyone who found me from
TikTok back in the day found me because I was obsessed with the
twin flame journey. Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh, don't
get me started on that. Yes, Oh my gosh, let's.
Go cuz I can totally say that I was under a spiritual psychosis.
I'm going to be honest is a person that came into my life
that like Long story short, I'm not going to say who it is
because like they are famous, but like I was going to their
show, quote UN quote, never saw this artist a day in my fucking
life. I'm going to their concert and I
see them in traffic at a stoplight in trouble, and I look
over and I look at my friend and I'm.
Like, Oh my gosh. Do you see this person?
And they're like, yes. And like they see me and I see
them and they knew who I was like was from social media.
And so they just kind of like waved to like follow them.
And so I followed them and then next thing you know, I'm in VIP
with them on the stage at the concert.
So like Long story short, I thought that.
Was my gosh. I thought that motherfucker was
my twin flame. Like the story like is deeper
than that, but that's just like the surface of it.
So like the spiritual psychosis that I was in was also really
inspirational too. Like it really helped elevate my
gifts because we do have a telepathic connection.
Like we what we did, we do whatever you want to say, but
you know what I mean? Like, yeah, we're just like,
this person is really toxic for me.
That's my twin. So I'm like, no, this person
actually elevated me in a way that was like spiritual.
We never had physical sex or like contact, but it was like
really flirtatious, really connected, really just like odd
occurrences. And so I just thought that was
my twin flame. Like I still to this day know
there is a spiritual tie there. I just have like moved that
programming I guess or that illusion, you know what I mean
of the twin flame thing. But I would love to hear your
take on it like I would. I love it.
Yeah. So I completely understand where
you're coming from because I used to think about that as
well. Like if I align with a certain
person in many different aspects, I'm like Oh my God
they're my twin, they're my shadow aspect or whatever the
fuck. And I became obsessed with
either elevating myself enough to be able to have union with
them or recently I started talking to another friend that
believes that your twin flame changes as you elevate her
belief is that at the moment you're in, you're registering
with the twin flame right now, but when you grow spiritually,
you're going to tap into a completely different twin flame
because we're always changing timelines.
So because of that, I don't even know what to believe, to be
honest. And it I just got to the point
now where I'm like, I don't care who the fuck my twin flame is.
I just my divine counterpart. So that's what I say now.
I say I want divine union with whoever aligns with me at this
moment. And if they reflect certain
things to me that I need to heal within myself, I'll work on
that. And if we end up drifting apart,
that's fine. But I try not to become obsessed
with being with someone specifically because then that's
where the spiritual psychosis can come in.
Or you are maybe blocking your union with somebody else.
That might be even better. And as a tarot reader, like that
happens a lot. There's people that are obsessed
with knowing, is this person going to change?
Are they ever going to change? Are we going to be together?
And I'm like, bro, there's someone better.
But you are so stuck on this person.
Yeah. So I try not to obsess with the
whole Twin flame thing. I used to be, but not anymore.
Now I just, I'm like, I just want my person.
I don't give a fuck what you call them.
I just want to be with a person that aligns with me.
That's all I care about now. Can I just say that the tarot
reader to twin flame to freedom pipeline is like really active
in both of our life. And you know, what I love about
this is that that person that I was speaking on actually married
someone who is a psychic and so like like the connection is wild
as fuck. But you know what I've like
really recently found very intriguing the identity swapping
terminology. Yeah.
Like people like molding other people into you or, and, or
whatever. And I really do think that men
mold women into a woman that they like fumble and or like
wish they would have had kind of like just an example, pop
culture example. I'm not a huge Taylor Swift fan
or anything, but like that Travis Kelsey guy used to date
an African American woman and had like swag and like had like
macdaddy energy. And then now he's given like,
let's go to Target and get Starbies and hug pods for
Christmas. And Oh my gosh.
Energy, his aura, everything about him, his, his haircut, his
beard, I mean, at multiple things.
Like I do know that, you know, when you're with people,
friends, partners, whoever the fuck you to be careful baby,
because you are molding and shaping and forming.
Just like when you have like something you say a lot and then
other people around you pick up on that.
And I feel like it's definitely interesting how many people
around me I feel like have tried to mold into me over the years
or at like, Oh my. God.
Have dated girls who like I feel like studying me on the side,
like they have like a one-on-one.
Girl, Oh my God. OK, I cannot tell you how many
times a man has approached me and been like, Oh my God, I've
been following your page. Or or let's say they don't
follow me but they get to know me and how spiritual I am that
I'm a tarot reader. All this stuff.
They start saying shit like I manifested you.
I'm like, bro, you don't even fucking know how to manifest.
You don't even fucking and have money and all of a sudden you're
talking to me and I'm telling you that like I'm independent
and all this stuff and suddenly you have goals to be independent
to and have your own business all of a sudden when you never
fucking did. And I'm like what the hell?
Cuz this is my full time job. Like I don't have a regular job.
So they I guess they get inspired by that and then
suddenly they have a goal to be a business owner.
And I'm like not saying that it's because of me that suddenly
they want to, but I mean it sure's house looks like it.
And I'm like, what the fuck? Like I feel like I'm a stepping
stone for them and they want to siphon my energy for that shit.
Or like when they say I manifested you like I don't like
that shit. I think they think it's cute and
they're like, oh, she's going to like me saying that, but I don't
like that because now it makes me feel like you've been
stalking me or something. And I'm like, no bro, like I'm
not someone that you manifested. You were literally stalking me.
But that or like I'll meet a guy that at first he'll make it seem
like he doesn't like tarot or astrology, none of that stuff.
Like he'll think it's weird and then out of nowhere, he's into
it now and he starts asking a bunch of questions.
And that happened with my recent ex.
When I first met him, he thought it was scary, quote UN quote
scary that I did tarot and new astrology.
And then when we broke up, after I found out he was cheating on
me, he fucking tried doing a spell on me, a love spell to get
me back. And I'm like, when I first met
him, he was never into that. And all all of a sudden now he
wants to do a spell on me to get me back.
Like get the fuck out of here with that.
You know, crazy about men is cuz like they really have
manipulated women and siphon their energy for centuries.
And one of my most redeeming qualities is that I am here to
be for the girl ancestors, like for the women, for the police,
for the fuck everyone else. Like honestly my ranking of like
what I care about is like animals and children at the top.
With. Women right there, swift under
it. Then we're talking like plants,
trees before we get to men. I'm serious, like I am so happy
when I'm not trying to actively date.
It's crazy. And honestly, the spiritual
awareness that being awakened or, or finding yourself or your
gifts or whatever is having like recollection where you
personally were taking blame or guilt or shame on from literally
having sex with these people. And that's what's crazy about
it. The amount I used to hate myself
when I had active sex with random people.
Not, and I don't even mean it as in like random, I just mean not
my husband, right? Like not not my forever, like
whatever And so. Casual sex, right?
Casual, right. Exactly.
Because I never really just hooked up with random people.
I had like my handful of of people over the years that were
like, you know, comfort zone people.
Yeah. You know what's wild about it is
like the celibacy journeys that I've also been on.
I love talking about it because I just want to like I want to
break the stigma around miscarriage because miscarriages
are divine protection and even. Oh my God.
Actively want a baby y'all. It is divine protection it.
Is Oh my gosh. And so like the protection that
I have felt like I was celibate for years, had sex once, got
pregnant, had a miscarriage, the anniversaries in a few days.
Oh my gosh. Redeeming.
Yes. Girl we have the same fucking
life. What the fuck?
Oh my God. Gosh, I cannot.
Yes. We're on the same I'm.
Sorry if I interrupted, but yes. Are we twin flames?
I'm like. Shit, probably.
No. I promise you.
I went through a bad breakup years ago and I was celibate for
one year and then, but I was single for three years, for
three of those years. So I was having casual sex at
first then I was celibate and then I met this guy that told me
he had been following my old TikTok because I had another
TikTok where I would post like gym stuff like working out and
stuff. So he told me he saw my TikTok a
long time ago and that he's been manifesting me ever since he saw
me. And all of a sudden I started
going to his gym because I I switched gyms.
I never met the guy. OK I just decided to switch
gyms. One day he came up to me and
told me hey I know you from TikTok and that's what hooked
me. I'm like, Oh my God, how
romantic. I'm meeting this guy out of
nowhere after I went to this gym and we hooked up like a few
times and I got pregnant immediately.
Immediately, like within a month and he switched up like night
and day after that he wanted nothing to do with me.
He was, I want to say like a literal demon because he did not
align with any of my values and it's my fault for having sex
with him right and not getting to know him so I take
accountability for that. But at the moment I was just so
googly eyed about him manifesting me supposedly that I
overlooked a bunch of shit and he's a legit fucking demon.
Like I can go into it about him, but I got pregnant and I was
crying one day. I was crying so hard.
And I'm not super religious, but I do believe in God, OK?
I do believe in God and Jesus, but I'm not, I don't follow a
religion. And I was on my knees praying to
God. Like if you take this baby from
me, I will be so grateful because I cannot do it.
I'm all for abortion. I'm all for your body, your
choice. But the moment I found out I was
pregnant, I don't know how to explain it, I felt an instant
connection to that that fetus, even though it was never fully
formed. I just felt a connection.
I cannot explain it unless you've ever been pregnant,
you'll understand. But I felt so much love for this
thing even though it was informed.
And I'm like, why do I love it so much?
Why do I care so much about it? And I could not go get the
abortion done. I couldn't.
I couldn't do it. So I prayed to God, please take
this from me if it's not meant to be.
And literally the next day I started bleeding and I went to
the doctor and they told me you're having a miscarriage.
So if that's not divine protection I don't know what the
fuck is. It was insane.
So that was my first and last
pregnant ever pregnancy ever. But I told him you fucking
ruined my whole experience of that shit.
Like what the fuck is wrong with you?
And I blocked him, never heard from him again.
But I was so mad at myself. You know, we are living in the
same reality girlfriend. Like no wonder I was like
scrolling Instagram and you popped up on my explorer.
I didn't I never saw your TikTok till today.
I'm not like one of those people that give a fuck about people's
following like you could have 10 followers.
I just thought you were cute. Your energy was cool.
You were talking in the comments like you weren't stuck up.
I could tell and like a lot of people are just weird on the
Internet. But I really do feel like we're
here to talk about this right now because the stigma around
miscarriage is so heavy and the women hold on to and the shame
that people put on to them about wanting to be a mother, not
wanting to be a mother XYZ. And but similar, very similar
situation that you're talking about, except the fact that
like, this guy was someone that I dated when we were young, like
teenagers. He's just been like that one
person who, and I'm not going to lie, like I'm not going to front
on him like that one person who can hit the spot even though
morals and values have never aligned since we became adults,
right? Like at most of this man's adult
life, he does not have a car. He just moves in and out of like
being a straight bum. You know what I mean?
And I have, I have everything going for me.
So yes, like I was dumbing myself down.
But it's more of like, you know how it is like the
disappointment to have sex with someone new And it's awful,
like, or the right like, so it's just one person that every few
years, like hits the spot real quick.
You know, that trend that's going around about getting
cracked. Like, yeah, Boo.
Like sometimes, like I've been celibate for years at this
point. And so Long story short, it was
4th of July like a holiday and I drank and I'd hardly ever drink
because every time I drink bad things happen.
I instantly the moment that it happened like the next day,
maybe like 3 days later I was at the gym and I was like you're
fucking pregnant. And then I was like, no, you're
not. And then I was trying to like be
in my own head about it. So I just instantly knew.
And it's funny because the gym was like where I had that
realization and then that likes aligns with your story.
So then I'm like, fuck. And so then, and what's crazy
about it is like what the reason this all happened is my mom came
to town and she wanted to see him and me and him had kind of
been texting. So it was kind of inevitable
that that like one time was going to happen.
But my mom kind of amplified it by making the wish that she had
a grandchild while he was in the presence.
He I don't think necessarily wish that I was having a
grandchild with him. I think the interaction of me
with a man that she hasn't seen me with anyone in a while just
gave her that epiphany of like, I really want a grandchild.
And she put that out there with her witchy fucking chaotic.
My mom would be a chaos witch if she, if she actually channeled
her magic. My mom would be scary if she
could actually harness her magic for real.
Cuz yeah, he does not play. So I know she put that out there
and she openly admitted it after it happened that she did like
make that wish in her head. She didn't like wish, but she
didn't like wish it. So then I just instantly knew I
was pregnant and what was crazy, it was the Cancer full moon or
the can't. It was a Cancer season and it
was a full moon. I'm sorry.
It was season in a full moon. And so like there was so much
like when I look back at the astrology of it, I was like, no
fucking wonder this happened. But it was really wild because
whenever, whenever it happened, I wasn't even going to tell him
because he's just such a child. I didn't expect him to give a
fuck really. And then I told him and then he
became like attached at the waist.
He was like about to change his whole life.
This man's ready to like do a 360.
And I was shocked. I was like, this is a different
person. I'm so shocked.
You can tell he really wanted this baby.
And like he has so much trauma. Like his mom was a drug addict.
She died, his dad abandoned him and that's about it.
Like, and his grandma took care of him and she embezzled money
from her business, from a business that she worked for and
basically. Lost everything.
So like what he lives in is a fucked up situation and like the
moral of the story is he's complacent in that situation and
made the wrong decision by allowing someone who like
doesn't even have a pot of piss and coming into my life.
But it's like that comfort zone, like that safety of like when
you date someone as a teenager, your fucking brain chemistry
changes for them, period, period.
Yep, and depending on what childhood traumas you have going
on at the moment, like you're going to seek out that comfort,
like you said, in a partner. Yeah, even into adulthood it
that shit never ends until you do the shadow work.
It's never going to end. It's a completely ongoing cycle
for the rest of your life, meeting the same kind of people
in different bodies until you fucking tackle what's really
going on. Where's the root of this?
Yeah. And, you know, it's crazy that,
like, it was such a healing experience because like, once I
started, once I had the miscarriage, he just ghosted me.
Like, never spoke to me ever again.
And then on the due date of our fucking imaginary child, he
texted me. He texted me, but then he unsent
the text message. I didn't even see it.
And favorite part about this is that it used to kind of be like
a revolving door that probably, like would have never end.
But what it was weird is like after we had rekindled before we
got pregnant, I kind of made the statement that like this between
him and me was super limited and that like I was going to find my
husband really soon. So like this would probably be
one of the last times. And then I was pregnant.
And then when I was pregnant, he did like such a 360 and I really
kind of like saw a new version of him in a way.
But then the moment that he ghosted me after a miscarriage,
like we could have just went back to being friends.
We could have just been like, wow, that was close call.
Like that was scary. Obviously we're not going to
date. We weren't going to date before
this. We were going to try to date
because of this. But you know, like I'm, I'm down
to earth. Maybe I don't want to, I don't
want to carry a man, trust me. But at this point, spirit
literally saved me from two children because he would have
been a child. Like it would have been.
Have you ever seen that movie with Drew Barrymore?
It's called Riding in Cars with Boys.
Oh no, I haven't. Oh my gosh, I haven't.
What is it about? I'll just like flashback, it's
like kind of centered in like the 90s vibe and she gets
pregnant in high school basically by this like a loser
dude. So then like the whole movie is
like based around him like drunk as fuck, just like doing way too
fucking much, basically traumatizing their kid,
traumatizing her son. And then like at the end of the
movie, she basically became like a famous author and she wrote a
book about her life and he was the guy, what, we'll just call
him Gary. I can't remember his name in the
movie, Dave or whatever the fuck his name was.
He basically was in the book so much because he was kind of a
main character of the book. He had to sign off on some
release papers. And like, she pulls up to his
trailer at the end of the movie and he's like drunk as fuck,
like belly out, like wife beat her dirty, like stained gross.
And I had this body that that could have that would have ended
up being my life. That would have been our life.
Like that would have been my son.
Fuck yeah, I know. It's fucked up so.
Hell no. Hell no.
I. Feel so blessed every day that
I'm child free and happy and don't have dragging me down.
I'm like, I can go another year without sex, straight up.
Oh it's easy to be celibate. It is the easiest fucking shit
to do. Like yes you'll get little urges
but when you think about like if it's worth breaking your
celibacy, it's not no. And you can easily use a toy and
get rid of that urge like in a minute.
I wouldn't want the whole toy. Drawer like I have the whole
drawer now. So.
Yeah, this toy in my life, I'm just completely over the what
are you doing? How have you been in, etcetera,
etcetera. Like if you, like you said at
the beginning of the episode, if you don't want to talk about
like aliens and conspiracy theories and like the people who
act like, oh, you have a podcast that's cool.
But like have never listened to it.
And I say this all the time, like if you're a man and you
think you're going to pursue me and you cannot even reference
one thing I'm actually doing that I'm passionate about that I
give a fuck about that. It's only centered around like
my body or something like that. Then like fuck and earlier I
think I don't know what I said but it's I think I said lustful
men disgust me on threat. Oh my God, same they do.
They just so gross. Oh my God, talking about that
it's so weird. So you know the Nike slogan it's
just do it or something like that.
So I was at Walmart 2 days ago or yesterday and I saw a person
wearing a shirt that said just do it.
But it was like the way I was viewing it was kind of cut off.
So the word just looks like lust and that's all I saw.
So I get little images like that, like throughout my day or
like downloads or like signs that are gonna tell me what's
coming up. It's so weird because shortly
after that, I get in line and this fucking guy, he's, he's has
a cart and he has his little daughter in the like sitting in
the front and she's probably like 3 years old.
And he's looking at me, 'cause I, he caught my attention and
he's looking at my body. He's not even looking at my
face. And he goes, excuse me?
Oh my God, you look so good. And he's looking straight at my
ass while he's telling me this. And he goes, you have a
boyfriend while he's looking at my ass.
And I'm like, looking at him in disgust.
And I'm like, I'll like, he's literally lusting over me in
front of his daughter. So he's like, you have a
boyfriend and I'm like, is that your daughter?
That was the first thing I said. And he goes, oh, yeah, this is
my baby girl, blah, blah, blah. Like talking sweet about her.
And I'm like, cute. I was like, yeah, I don't date
guys with kids. And then he's like, what?
And I'm like, yeah, I don't have kids, so I don't date guys with
kids. And I just looked at him up and
down in disgust because he was lusting after me.
And that shit pissed me off. And not just that, but like,
your daughter's right there in front of you and she's only a
baby, of course she's not gonna remember this.
But you're setting the tone for how you're gonna act or show her
what men are like. And I did not like that shit at
all. It was disgusting.
But yeah, that shit pissed me off.
Yeah, no, that's crazy because I actually the other day, like I
had to set this dude straight in my inbox because I just get so
sick of men in my inbox. Like, it's tender, like accepted
friend request is not a Tinder match.
You know what I mean? Like, I'm not on a dating app,
like whatever. So he basically messaged me and
wanted to bond over the fact that he used to work with one of
my exes. And I was like, and I was like,
I'm not sure if I would know you.
And he just kept like insinuating or like, you know,
and what do you say? He just kept being like, no, we
definitely met. And I'm just like, OK, might
have like, OK, what do you mean like anything?
Well, I'll just get to the point.
Maybe we could go have drinks and dinner sometime, etcetera.
And then said something about working a lot.
And he's been really busy with like all this stuff.
And he named all this like extracurricular activities.
And so I wrote back and I said dinner sounds nice and I
appreciate the offer, but if you work that much and have that
much going on, I highly doubt you have the energy or time for
what I'm looking for because I'm not looking for something
casual. So I'll have to pass on your
offer. Appreciate you, though.
Yeah. And then started back and was
like, well, I'm not going to be working as much coming up.
OK, not convincing. All of a sudden, don't.
Give a fuck. It's so annoying.
I I totally get you because well, I do readings, right?
And I get a bunch of messages every day asking me what my
prices are, what do I offer, a bunch of stuff.
And what pisses me off the most is men will message me and
they'll ask me, oh, how much do you charge for reading about my
ex? This happened to me the other
day. This guy was asking me about his
ex if I do love spells, so I can do a love spell on her to get
her back. And he was just talking to me
about my ex and I mean his ex. So I got to the point where I'm
like, look, if you're truly interested, go to my site in my
bio and you can book. Like I'm not going to keep
having this conversation back and forth about what Ioffer and
what I don't offer because I feel like he was just want to
talk to me. So I cut it off like at that and
then like 2 days later he messages me like hey so do you
have a boyfriend? So I know I knew it.
I'm like what the fuck I fucking knew it.
He was just messaging me prior to that just to talk nonsense,
but then he asked me if I have a boyfriend when he was literally
asking me about doing a spell on his ex.
I'm like what the fuck is that? And I get that a lot.
Like men will want to book and then they just want to
conversate or they want to talk to me on Instagram messages.
I'm like this is not a fucking dating site.
So I fucking posted a picture recently and I pinned that shit
to my profile pretty much saying if you message me romantically I
ain't going to fucking write back because this page is a
business page for the girls and the gays only and the
spiritually connected men. If not, fuck off because I'm
tired of it. You know, I love that so fucking
much. I have so many things I want to
say, like so many topics. I feel like we could talk for a
while. So what I wanted to say about
the first thing men, I don't know what it is about a man that
will book a reading, but then think that that entitles them to
a follow up session at any given moment.
The I've had men who are married, I mean just men on far
left field. Like not even men that I don't
even think are necessarily trying to sleep with me that
book readings and appreciate it. And my prices have like, you
know, evolved over time. But at the same time, like this
happened when my prices were cheap too.
So it's like moral of the story is they'll book a reading and
it's like they don't see the initial value in it, but they
book it anyways. And then they love it, but they
don't want to admit they love it.
So then they act like they need like more clarification later.
Like you watch my reading and you mentioned birds.
So like if this person's listening down the road and you
hear this, I will just say that I thought this was a pretty
self-explanatory. So I'm using it as an example,
not being a hater, but in the reading it said that this
person's ancestor was going to use birds to get their
attention. Not was the most beautiful owl
that I've ever fucking seen hanging out in their backyard in
a residential neighborhood. They had a whole less bird fly
in their house and their wife called them and was like, bro,
there's a bird in the house and what the fuck do you mean it's
in the house? And they were like here.
And then literally there's a video the bird was flying in
their vaulted ceiling in their home.
So like, I just feel like those were like there was no more to
explain. The fact that you're messaging
me for further clarification kind of just sent me off the
wire because like I predicted that.
And now it's came in multiple occurrences that are just way
too far fetched to be a coincidence in in even a non
believer's eyes, right? Like I mean this, I've never
even seen an owl like this in my own with my own eyes.
I don't think it was one of those furry majestic ones like
the ones that are like from Canada.
Like I don't know where it came from.
It was not, it was not from Kentucky.
I've never seen this in my life. So moral of the story is it's
like, I don't know if men just think that it like comes with an
extra side of fries for life or like bottomless fries.
But I've also had men do the same shit and recently one of
them kind of like out of themselves and it's like they
they watch me from a burner profile is what it is like.
Or yeah, one of those men that like, maybe doesn't really use
social media. And I know he's like an older
guy because there's only been a handful of like older guys that
have booked over the years for like a video reading.
But the other day one of them messaged me and they said a few
years ago, I booked a reading with you just so I can look at
your face. And I was like, great.
And then oh. Hell no.
Whenever I send guys my website it is like radio silence.
Like I think people think that I want to read them but what's
crazy is I've been so uninterested in men.
I have not asked a man for his birth time in like 3 years at
all. Like at all?
No. I know exactly what you mean.
That's why when I do readings I just do by phone call because
that has happened to me before as well.
Men will book and they ask me, can I FaceTime you instead?
Or is there like a video option? And I'm like, I don't need to be
on video to read your energy, Sir.
Like this is I'm good, I'm fine. He's like, well, what if I want
to look at the cards and I'm like, I can send you a picture
of the cards afterwards if you want.
Hell no. I don't want them to be lusting
out over me to video. Hell no.
Well at this point my price for a one hour video is $300.00 so
y'all can book right now. I do have code 50 off you know
but like at the end of the day like I'm not playing with these
motherfuckers. Like if you want to pay, I used
to do intro like one hour new client reading.
So if you had never booked with me or you was your first time
and it was $111.00 and literally that price point, because that
points I had went viral and I had went on to podcasts that
made me go even more viral and things like that over the years.
And at that price point, at one point I got booked out for six
months and it was, it was dramatic girl like it was.
My God. I came down with like the worst
fucking flu and like spiritual flu and just like just burnout
that you've ever had. And that happened in like
February of this year. And I had to take a full step
back. Like I had to literally like
take every service off my website and completely take a
full step back. So it was just like, it was one
of those like be careful what you wish for and also like
yourself accordingly because that price point really opened
it the floodgates for like anyone and everyone.
And even like at that, like people don't realize what I can
do in an hour. Like I can talk for fucking
days. And I'm saying videos with like
all the signs and all the things.
And like a lot of people can't channel like that.
Like they've lost the technique. And I think that making videos
like you do, and that's what I used to do as well.
It is really great practice and it's really good for the
collective, but I got burned out on the collective too because
their energy can be so in like fear dense like BS programs and
like Yep, I really excelled away from those programs.
It's really hard to just jump back in for free all the time.
So I had to like I've just completely quit doing all of it.
I know exactly what you mean. It's because when you're reading
people's energy, if you're truly tapped in, it could be draining.
And then if you don't protect yourself enough or you don't set
boundaries, my mentor, mentor calls it spiritual boundaries.
You're going to get burnt out. And then what was your passion
becomes more like a chore At one point, you know, it feels like,
damn, I don't want to go to work to my 9:00 to 5:00 or whatever.
In this case, it's Terrell. Whatever you're doing
spiritually, it it gets draining and you have to set those
boundaries and you have to tell certain people, you know what?
No. Like I for whatever reason, I'm
getting told that I cannot do a reading for you.
And I'm sorry. Maybe there's someone out there
better for you. Yeah, I've got and I'll get
that. I'll get downloads like that.
Like people will message me like for a reading.
And it's just something about them that tells me no, don't do
it. And I won't.
And those are the boundaries that I set for myself.
And I have to increase my prices too.
I know exactly what you mean because the cheaper you're
pricing anyone has access to your energy and not everyone is
good energy or. The residue that like is
leftover, yeah, like spiritual burnout is like it's long
lasting and it took me a minute to recalibrate myself.
But now also like want to just add cuz the listeners we're kind
of later in the season. So I'm just going to spill the
tea a little bit. The whole Gemini thing was a
shit show, y'all. So she just completely fell off
the face of the earth. And I was taking on the brunt of
that responsibility for like months to keep the podcast
floating. You know, we're in season 4 and
we're doing freaking 2 episodes a month, which is bullshit.
That's just fucking if you don't got time to sit down and talk
for an hour or two a week, why do you even have a podcast?
That's why we because it was effortless and I mean you were
you're a stranger, like you know what I mean?
Like we just met kind of thing and you can take time for me.
So it's like it was just way left field, way caught off
guard. So I was taking on the emotional
labor of that as well. So I like when I took a step
back from my business in February, I also was being
drained by we came back with the podcast like at the beginning of
January and by the end of February when I was getting sick
and was like super burned out, it was a fucking mess already.
But like, you can't just abruptly end a season with like
a few episodes. So I was thinking like, you
know, I'm going to give give her grace and all that and like, try
to let it work itself out. But it just kept getting like
worse and worse and worse. And with that being said, like I
was taking on so much emotional labor and like had really poured
my heart and soul into this project as well as my business.
And both of them was feeling like work.
And the only thing that wasn't feeling like work that I was
actually enjoying was my 9:00 to 5:00.
The only thing that all of us and like actually like I've said
a million times, I would never want to put all the pressure on
my gifts because I am a control freak and I like to have things
like already in motion like health insurance, don't have to
think about it different things like I need that in motion to
feel safe because I'm a Taurus or I can't.
Oh my God, me too, I'm a Taurus. We're living the same split
reality. Look the Mandela Effect
together. We are coming.
I love. It.
Are you an April or a May Taurus?
May I was born May 4th, May 3rd. Worst day?
Yeah, mines May 13th. Nice.
Yes. So I definitely relate because
as Tauruses, we're detail oriented.
So whenever we take on a project, even just mentally,
like, hey, I'm going to work on this podcast or whatever, we're
already burning ourselves out without even starting because
we're already thinking of all the insurance and outs, the
logistics of when you're going to do it and like it.
We stress out just from that alone.
We're perfectionists, and that's where procrastination comes in,
because you get so burned out just by the thought of it that
you just want to avoid it completely.
Yeah. So yeah, I guess you.
Like not cool about it is like the audience was like catching
on that like my energy was off on the podcast and like other
energy was off on the podcast. And like, I'm not talking shit.
I'm just being realistic. Like she left everyone hanging
like completely emotionally detached from the platform and
from the conversation. And it just was like we were
talking to a completely new person.
Because I've had so many people be like, girl season 1 through 3
fire season 4. Who the fuck was that?
They're like, who the fuck was that?
And you know, I'm still like sending her love and peace
because like, there ain't no way anyone who's ever wronged me is
going to do better in any fucking way.
Like, you know, like I don't compete and I do not give a
fuck. And at the end of the day, like,
get out of my way. Just get off, get out of my way.
Like send you love, send you peace, but just get out of my
way. So, you know, knowing that like
sitting down with you is like already months and months into
the podcast, but we're recording it, you know, and like, no one
even knows when we recorded it. It's such a blind space because
like now I can just like really vibe with new people and build
new bonds and friendships because it's my Internet like
friendships and I like growing my community.
But I will tell you, between me and Gemini's communities coming
together, we've had more snakes in the grass, more identity
swappers, fucking just straight fucking energy vampires, fucking
demons, fucking succubuses. We've had it all.
Like we have literally the craziest thing is like had
people people like bring themselves to our cities, both
of us just separately and like create like a girl gang of like
a group of people come and visit and it's a hot mess shit show.
And the whole time the universe is like this is not in
alignment. You know what I mean?
Like, I don't know, it's like it's weird, but I also feel like
she and I had a lot of things where I don't have boundaries as
far as like telling someone like, no, you're stealing my
idea. Like no, that's my idea.
No, all those things you keep doing, I already did those and I
don't like taking my idea. So I feel like for a while she
was kind of like I did any swapping with me and then
scamming people at the end of the day.
And and like, this is public knowledge.
So, you know, I feel at this rate, I have awakened so much
more by connecting with new people like you because
everyone's energy brings something new in where I can
once again see that it wasn't me.
Like it wasn't me doing exactly. I was just like a innocent
bystander to the shit show. And I was like trying to like
calm everything down. And I gave people like Grace and
I've given people plenty of space, but like, straight up
just disrespecting people's time gets old.
And whether it's a client, a partner, a friend, a business
situation like disrespecting people's time is not fucking
cool. Yep, definitely.
And like you said, you guys built an audience, and for her
to just ghost everyone like that, it's kind of like a slap
in the face to your audience because it's like, we've been
here for you guys and you just leave.
Like, you just shut the door on us.
Like we don't matter because she got her recognition through the
audience. And it's like she's just
completely disregarding them. So I don't like that.
Yeah, you know, that's very disrespectful.
And you know so many people have DM me over the last six months
like where the fuck did she go because she's been Mia on social
media. Like who builds A TikTok?
The outside energy you don't even know who the fuck she is.
Builds A TikTok of like 200 K followers from the ground up.
Has multiple podcasts, a full business, a full Patreon is
generating thousands of dollars a month and just walks away from
everything. Yep, who does Yep, where like
what the fuck is going on? And so like it's been shocking
for everyone because I, you know, I understand someone maybe
wanting to walk away from a project, but I would never let
something like that come between me and someone that I cared
about, you know, But here recently, what I've learned and
what I've been seeing, and maybe you've been seeing this is a lot
of people are like secretly in competition and they know
they're losing because they have not been putting in that inner
spiritual work. And I really do feel like the
spiritual people, and I've said this a bunch, I have like an
Oracle deck I made that I put this in when you have pure
intentions, like you can't lose, like period.
I said it five years ago, I'll say it again, like when you have
pure intentions, you can't lose no matter if it looks like I'm
moving slower or getting a set back or having a falling out,
it's actually building me up forward.
And so, you know, I really love that like taking over this
project and how like it's bringing in new energies and
like, instead of just the same old shit because I do feel like
we are a product of like the three closest people to us.
Oh fuck yeah, I completely agree with that.
Yeah. And as I've gone through my
spiritual journey, I've shed a lot of people situations and
I've gained new a new tribe and my closest two friends that I
have right now we're exactly the same on a spiritual level.
I call them my mentors because they teach me certain things
that I didn't know and I teach them certain things that they
didn't know. I have the following on the
TikTok and I'm teaching them how to post videos, how to edit
them. And they teach me stuff about
like esoteric wisdom, like stuff that I still have to learn
about. So it's great.
And, and it shows you a little snippet of where you're headed.
You know, like we've been saying throughout this episode, like,
what the hell? We're living the same fucking
life. It's so crazy.
And you're literally showing me what I can expect in my future
because literally everything you're doing and what you've
gone through, I've already gone through.
Or I, I've already envisioned it because I've envisioned myself
having a podcast and an Oracle deck like you just said.
I'm like, holy shit. I'm literally working on one
right now. And I'm glad you're not gonna
put this out till later cuz I'll, I probably won't put it
out till later. So hopefully by the time this is
out, let's press out. That's so perfect.
You know, I I made multiple Oracle decks I made so crazy.
You know what's crazy about your TikTok name?
My first Oracle deck's called You are the Oracle and green and
it's clearly like, you know, sold out like I only fuck.
Yes. Then the second.
I love that. Was called Light as a Feather
and that was my higher self deck and I loved it.
It was baby blue, had wings on the front with stars.
And then I designed it all, designed all the covers.
I did everything by hand. And then my other one was called
the Divine Intervention Oracle, and it's like red.
And actually I had a few leftover and I sent one to Alex
Serves. She was the very first guest on
the podcast this season and she just tagged me in like a post.
She has millions of followers on TikTok, a lot of conspiracy
stuff. But what's funny is like we're
talking about divine timing. And on her episode, like years
ago, I had asked her to come onto the podcast and she was
like, no. And then the moment Jim and I
was gone, she was like, hell yeah, turn up, I'll be on.
And then we did a 2 hour interview and it was so good.
But I sent her a couple decks and I did send her that Oracle
deck. But yeah, making an Oracle deck
was so much fun. And honestly, my original deck
would blow up and go viral on TikTok because no one could see
those cards anywhere else. And what I loved about TikTok at
that time is it wasn't super saturated.
You know, they say now with the Internet, there's like millions
of videos being uploaded every 5 minutes.
Whereas like five years ago, there really wasn't millions of
videos quote UN quote being uploaded.
Maybe photos, but not necessarily videos.
And so we think the way that we communicate changes and like my
problem is like, I like to make like record things, but I don't
like to edit them or I don't even want to share them.
Like I'll record things and then not share it.
I don't know, I'm weird. Like I used to want to share
everything, but I've went into like this hermit, like reserving
my energy mode. And like now the clients that
book me are like super aligned. I'm not drained at all.
I'm not like sold out either. And that's what I like.
Like I don't want to be sold out.
I don't want to like constantly just be at service for people,
you know, But I've had a lot of clients like reach out from like
all over the world ever since I've like kind of dialed back my
energy. So it's like my reach is further
all of a sudden, but I'm not touching as many people at the
same time. It's because not everyone
deserves your energy or they're not even ready for it.
Even if you reach millions of people all the time, if they
come to you, what if they're not even ready for whatever lesson
you're about to give them or knowledge whatever, They're not
going to take it. So whoever's aligned with you at
the moment will find you at whatever price you're giving
your readings for, because they're connected to your energy
and that's all that matters. Yeah, I was looking at your
services earlier. So tell me about your removal
spell work, because that's originally how I found you.
You were talking about attachments coming through,
doing spell work for other people and entities trying to
attach to you or trying to stop you from removing them.
And I, I was on your website earlier and I saw that you have
like this big ritual and I opened it up and it like looks
really in depth and you were like, I need a photo of your
face and this and I can't perform this without these
details and stuff. And I really like it.
So tell me about that. How did you get into doing the
removals? What is like so special about
that? Like tell us more.
OK so the video that you're referring to was about a cord
cutting spell so I don't know what it is.
I've always been drawn to cord cutting spells.
I'm all about self empowerment and letting go of what no longer
serves you. I'm not the type that does love
spells. No offense to witches that do
love spells, but I'm all about no fuck no.
Let that guy go or let that girl go and move the fuck on.
How about that? How about you learn the lesson?
Integrate and move the fuck on from the person that does not
serve you. Like hell no.
So I'm all about that. So I do a lot of cord cutting
spells. That's like my specialty, but I
did one in particular and I do protection work before anything.
But for some reason I felt a very heavy energy from this
client. And as I'm doing her cord
cutting, I'm getting like pain in my shoulder blade and I'm
shivering and I'm getting a headache and I'm like, what the
heck is happening here? And it was late.
It was like 1 in the morning, 2:00 in the morning when I was
doing her cord cutting. And I texted her and I said,
hey, you're probably asleep. It's really late.
But just so you know, I'm feeling these physical symptoms
while doing your cord cutting. So just be aware you might feel
it too. And she texted me like at 3-4 in
the morning, but by that time I was already done with her spell
and I was in bed and I woke up at exactly 3 in the morning to a
burp. I I burped myself awake and I'm
like what the fuck? And I felt a presence and I just
felt a heavy energy and I'm like, I think I absorbed
something from this lady. Like she probably had a demonic
attachment to her from her ex and it was probably some kind of
like a parasite type of demon. I'm I don't know much about
demons right now. I'm still studying it but I'm
assuming it was a parasite. And when I woke up I checked my
phone and she had texted me and she said, hey, I just saw your
text. I woke up to a bunch of pain in
my shoulder blade and I told her, yes, I feel a presence.
I don't know what the fuck I removed during your cord
cutting, but that was not the point of that.
The point of the cord cutting was to sever her cord with her
ex. I didn't think there was no
demon attached, none of that. And I felt so exhausted and so
did she. She told me, you know what?
I can't sleep. I feel like a bunch of pain.
I feel like there's a presence in my room right now not wanting
to leave. I feel like something's angry at
me. And I'm like, I think we
triggered whatever the fuck your ex had that latched onto you.
I think that energy is angry that we're removing it.
So my mentor, my friend, she knows more about demons.
And she told me like, yeah, we're probably going to have to
do an extraction. And I said, what's that?
And she told me that's a shamanic technique where people
go into your energy field and they extract with their mind or
with their energy. Witchcraft, demonic entities,
karmic soul contracts, a bunch of stuff.
She said the cord cutting probably wasn't fully
successful. You're going to have to go in
deeper and remove whatever that was.
So she taught me how to do that because she actually paid for a
mentor of her own to teach her how to do those techniques.
But since she's my friend, she was teaching me how to do it.
So I learned from her. And so I kept working with that
client on doing that. And I didn't have that listed on
my site yet as a service. So I practiced on her.
I said, hey, I just learned about this new technique.
I'm gonna try it on you, but I won't charge you.
I just want to see if I'm successful or not.
And I was. And I'm like, holy shit, I'm
actually powerful. That's when I first realized how
powerful I am. And people in the comments are
like Oh my God you didn't protect yourself, you didn't do
it right blah blah blah. And it's like it's not about
that. There's deeper shit that y'all
don't understand that even with protection you cannot bypass
that shit. And I've learned that that
experience happened to lead me to doing extractions.
Nothing is coincidence. People may call me, you know, an
experience that I didn't protect myself, whatever the fuck.
But at the end of the day, had I never experienced that, I would
have never had that listed as a service on my site.
And that has never happened ever again.
I've never had an attachment to me ever again after that.
I think that had to happen as a lesson for me for to realize how
powerful I am. So I I still didn't add it on my
site at that moment. I kept practicing on other
people and on myself and I started realizing, damn, like
this actually works. I'm actually doing it correctly
and I was tweaking my technique. And it's all you believing in
yourself, going into a meditative state and knowing
that nothing can attach to you and just protecting yourself,
knowing about the chakras, knowing what you're doing.
And now I added it to my site. And yes, I need a picture
because I'm able to tap into their energy better.
I don't need a picture or to see your face when I do a reading.
But for whatever reason for this ritual, I do need it.
I think cuz the eyes are the windows to the soul.
Like, I do need to see you and be able to know these things.
And I've had amazing results from clients.
They've told me, like after I do the ritual, they feel a sudden
relief either physically or emotionally.
They'll cry suddenly. But what it entails is you go in
energetically into a person's energy, their chakra system.
So I do a chakra scan. So I look at every single chakra
to see what blockages are present.
And then I asked my guides to take me to any past lives or any
events that happened in this life that triggered that
blockage or that repeating cycle or whatever it is, the trauma,
whatever. And I kid you not, I'll see
literal visions in my head play out of what they went through
that caused that pain or suffering.
And I literally, I don't know how else to explain it but I
feel like I'm merging with their soul body when I'm in the
meditative state. I'm merging with my clients soul
body with their permission and I'm like removing it from myself
but I'm actually removing it from them in the process because
I'm merged with them. I don't know how else to explain
it other than that, and I can't. I can't really say how I got to
that point other than just practicing because people are
like, how do you know how to do that?
I'm like, I don't know. I just see shit, it just
happened. I don't know.
Like Reiki at all. I don't do Reiki.
I would say that's kind of similar to Reiki because I'm
looking at the chakras and removing stuff from them.
But I don't physically do Reiki like in person to clients.
It's all remote. I don't have people in front of
me. I'm I'm just doing it with my
mind. It's insane.
I don't know how to explain what's going on, but that's what
I do. No, I like that because I do
everything virtually as well. Yeah.
Like what you're doing is kind of similar to like what I would
be doing with like a banishment removal, like kind of type thing
because like I'm doing a shock or clearing.
Like I feel like depending on what I'm clearing, cleansing or
banishing or what I'm doing, it's very similar to something
like that, except that I personally don't feel like, I
don't know how to explain this. But I think that I was seeing
too much as a kid and seeing too much that I was like, you know
what? I don't need to see it, Just let
me know. And now I just know everything.
And I know that sounds fucked up, but I know you get it.
Because like I feel a lot and I used to see a lot.
I used to say that because you, whatever gift you're using, if
you listen to the practitioner, they'll kind of tell you what
gift they're using. They'll be like, I see this, I
feel this, I know this, I hear this, you know, like they're
going to tell you what gift they're using.
Confirmation from my my soul cat here.
But I have a. Black cat too.
Sorry, I have a cat. Too, but I.
Have a black cat? He's a boy who.
His name is Binks. Oh, this is Phoenix Brothers.
But yeah, no, I personally feel like spirituality has brought so
much change into my life that like what I what worked for me a
year ago or like five years ago or seven years ago.
I don't necessarily like always do the same thing.
Like I used to be into like manifesting money, money bowls
this that. I don't ever do money magic
anymore. I feel like I am the frequency,
like I am the I am the magnet. Like I just always have money.
Money just loves me like money just loves me so much.
We don't even have to have that conversation anymore.
And so like our different things like that and like I was
watching this video the other day and it was talking about
like claiming the life you want to live.
Like I claim my dream body, I claim my dream life, I claim my
dream reality and like just setting authority.
And that's something that I've been really big on.
So I knew that was like a mirrored message because
sometimes, you know, we're all like once again repeating
similar energies in our own way and transmuting it or
transponding it in different ways that resonate with our own
collective, our own following or people who are on our frequency
and what you. Mentioned earlier at the
beginning of the episode I forgot to even touch on.
I also believe that you have different twin flames at
different frequencies because I believe that my original twin
flame was a catalyst twin flame. We were both catalysts for each
other. I, I feel like I rose to the
occasion in ways that they were choosing not to.
So I went to a different frequency.
Nothing wrong with them, nothing wrong with me, but it was just
like, I feel like I elevated to a different frequency beyond the
grips of, of control or hyperphyxiation or needing to be
right or whatever. Cuz so many symbolic things
happened over time that like, I know I was right.
I know that that was a catalyst in my life and I don't give a
fuck what else it was, you know, like I don't need a label.
And so the surrender and the letting go that I was able to
adapt and like cultivate from that experience is like
timeless. And now it's like so hard.
It's getting harder and harder for men to even get my
attention, like because there's nothing about them that's
getting my attention at all. And it's it's crazy because I
have always been a little boy crazy in my life, like
especially when I was younger. And so, so like these last like
really prom adult years of my life that I've just been like
celibate and single is really interesting because I would
never have dreamed that I would have made it to my 30s with like
no children and no husband and no like, no oops.
And like that second chance though, like what you said you
were praying for. And I also believe in God.
I also believe in Jesus. I think Jesus was a martyr.
And I also think they, I mean, I don't think I know he was not
white. For everyone's listening, I'll
say it again. Jesus was not Oh no, Jesus was a
witch because I've. Seen him during a shrimp trip.
Yeah. He's brown.
I don't know if you just shrimp. Yeah, I don't know if you do
shrooms or not, but it's crazy. And I'm sorry to interrupt, but
I never believed in Jesus fully before.
I always questioned it because I consider myself agnostic.
I question everything, right? I'm like, wait, why?
Why? What's the root of this?
And I've always been like, I don't know.
I don't know if I believe in him.
And I went on a trip one time and he literally came to me and
since then I believe him 100%. I'm like he exists.
I saw him with my own eyes. I don't care what people say I
believe in him. And we literally had a full
blown conversation in my head telepathically on my trip and it
was insane. And the reason I know he's real
is because I don't know anything about the Bible.
Well, now I do, but at the moment, I didn't know anything
about the Bible or like, biblical figures.
And a woman came to me during that same trip named Mary
Magdalene, and I had no idea who she was.
OK. So the next day when I was
sober, I started going on a rabbit hole.
Who is this lady? And I knew I knew that that was
no coincidence. I'm like, they're trying to show
me that they're real. So I don't care what people
think. Like I said, I don't practice
religion, but I know Jesus Christ is real.
So when people comment like oh Jesus loves you in my tarot
videos, I'm like you don't even know.
Like I know him shut the fuck up.
Like you think you're offending me but.
The thing not plant medicine that really I encourage for
every person it I don't think that it's something that
everyone is ready for, but I do think there is a taboo or like a
stigma around it that people just think they're going to have
a bad trip. But I just want to pre warn you,
your syllabus is like good trip, good trip, crazy dark night of
the soul, cry your eyes out trip, cry a little bit, but
still a good trip. Then you'll have another dark
night. Then you'll go have some like
decent. You can like laugh and watch a
funny movie. But like I do feel like not all
trips are treated equally. And I personally over the years
have like this like really like tripping alone because I just
like being in my own energy and just not having to be like
performative or be anything like now that I'm like so locked in
with my spirit team and my, and like the ancestors, like I
really trip like just so I can hang out and vibe in my own like
space. And like, that's my favorite
place to be anyway. So I don't know, I think that
plant medicine is not for everyone because not everyone's
really ready to face their soul. And that's why I think like
society in itself has kind of outlawed things that help us
because if everyone took plant medicine and like really started
to heal, I think that like, it would be like 95% of people quit
their job on Monday or like whatever.
Yep. You know, like, I don't know.
I think so definitely what the machine would like blow up.
I always call this place the machine.
Yep. No, you're absolutely right.
I believe, In my opinion, people shouldn't do it until their
frontal lobe is developed because it doesn't develop till
you're 25 because you're still vulnerable.
Prior to that, you're still growing.
You haven't had enough life experience.
And then even after that, after your frontal lobe is fully
developed, have you done shadow work?
Have you addressed certain karmic cycles within yourself
while sober? Have you done any healing work
at all to any capacity? Because yeah, it can be
extremely overwhelming. I remember on my trip, it was
recent, it was barely this year, this past year.
And I'm so blessed to be at the point where I'm at because I was
ready. But if I had taken shrooms like
prior to that, hell no. I would probably go on a
spiritual psychosis, so I think I was at a point in my life
where I was fully ready for it. Yeah, Lord help me, because I
just grew up around substance abuse.
Like the first time I ever smoked weed, I was 11 years old.
I had done mushrooms and like pills and all those things way
before, like 16, like way before we really were in high school.
We were doing everything. And back then they were really
like dirt rooms. But as of late, I actually got
some like lab grown like shrooms that are like fucking crazy.
And I did this trip and this was like my my latest trip.
It was earlier in the year, but I've only tripped that one time
this year. I hadn't tripped in a while.
And honestly, I was kind of scared because I knew that it
was like it was after the miscarriage, you know, it was
like I knew there was going to be a lot of healing happening.
So I was nervous about it. But I got these chocolates that
were like, you know, whatever. So like, OK, I'm going to take
one chocolate. It probably won't be that big of
a deal. Took this one chocolate.
It was only 1g. But it's like those lab grown,
those lab grown babies there. And I'm telling you, this thing
sent me into a fucking a whirlwind, a tornado heaven.
I went from every emotion to every layer of fucking crying.
And then I was having a moment with Mother Earth.
You were talking about Jesus coming to you.
Mother Earth came to me. And she, I get really upset
about them, like cutting trees down and hurting animals and
stuff. But she like is always reminding
me that like, she's in control. And so she was like really
emphasizing that she'll flip this, this fucking table over.
She just kept telling me that like it was like a woman, like
very aggressive woman with red hair was like, I will flip this
whole fucking table over. You don't worry about it.
She kept telling me that I'm only here to raise the vibration
of this planet. This is the plastic planet.
She has another planet. They tell you there's not
another one, but there is. This is the fake one.
She kept telling me this is not the real one.
She kept telling me like, quit worrying about the trees.
She kept telling me. They're all over.
And they keep saying that this is the only place that there's
wood. I saw something the other day.
It was like NASA that Earth is the only place where would
exist. It was the dumbest shit I ever
read. Because how would they know?
Like they don't know anything so.
My God. All this girl and this was like
this was like peak of February. I'm telling you 2 weeks later we
had astronomical and historical flooding where I live,
historical flooding in. We had like 52 tornadoes
touchdown of which several were very near me and one of them
went into a neighborhood of someone I had done a a major
return to center on SO. Oh my God.
Another one touched really close to my best friend's house, but
she was OK. And Long story short, Mother
Earth really was slipping the fucking table over.
She Oh yeah, that's how close to home it was.
Another friend of mine, it destroyed her complete warehouse
office building. Her office where she sets every
day, where her chair was. The roof caved in.
So Long story short, like divine protection was everywhere
because it hit at night in a business park.
When no one was at work and it demolished a daycare when there
were no children there. So I was doing all these
protection spells to protect our state, to protect our kids, to
protect everyone. And it worked.
And then I was like, damn, she was not playing.
Then next thing you know, there's a massive flood.
My hometown gets flood. I don't know why the people from
my hometown continue to move back after it gets flooded every
five years, but they do that. So they all move back now, but
for like six months they've had to rebuild back.
Like this all just happened. Like she was not playing.
And that's just in where I live, let alone what happened in the
United States elsewhere where all the fires and all the other
things. So she really was not fucking
playing. And then she was like, she kept
yelling at me and telling me that all's I need to do is raise
the vibration of this planet. She does not give a fuck about
anything else. Like, that's all I need to focus
on. She's like, don't you think
about this? Don't think about this.
Don't think about that. She's like, that's not what you
came here to do. Like, that's not your
responsibility. Like she was so serious.
And then next thing you know, there's historical flooding
everywhere. Like I'm like, oh.
I fucking love it. And then you're you're a Taurus
and it makes so much sense. I didn't have an experience like
that but during my trip I did to eat some cacao like natural
cacao. So I felt her energy too during
my trip, but not to your level like I was not.
Talking to her, I mean, this was like, I mean, I've had so many
layers of life of experiences, but this was one of the ones
that was like super intense. And then I kept hearing from
spirit during that trip. I kept hearing that I was a
Spice Girl. I kept hearing this Spice Girl,
Spice Girl. So then I wake up the next
morning and one of my best friends sent me all kinds of
Spice Girl videos. And then like a week later they
announced that they're going to do a reunion tour.
And I like, it's that I was like, Oh my God, Oh no.
They literally announced it like in March and this is like it so.
Who? Who came into my mind a lot
during my trip? Fucking Kanye West.
I'm like, why? Yeah, Kanye West.
Well, you are. Yeah, and I guess I guess like,
not, not that anything's gonna happen to him, but I guess he's
a Pisces moon like me. So I guess I relate to him like
on a deeper level with the way he feels things and experiences
things. I don't listen to his music a
lot. I don't know why the fuck he
came into my head, but he came into my mind and how.
He just alive anymore. He's not alive anymore.
That's. I don't think him or Britney
Spears. Girl girl, girl girl girl.
Oh my God. Okay, so first episode of the
podcast, shout out Alex serves. We deep dive on the Britney
Spears thing. Oh my God.
Britney's gone, if y'all haven't learned that from season 5 of my
fucking podcast. Britney is not alive anymore
ever since I started telling people about that episode coming
out. And so the reason I had found
Alex on TikTok is because when the Free Britney movement was
happening, she was making a lot of Britney content before they
came out with that Britney like podcast where they were like
dissecting her post in her comments and stuff before she
turned off her comments, before the conservatorship had ended,
Alex was making Britney content. And what's fucked up is me and
Alex have really bonded on the fact that we know we were like
at the Salem witch trials together.
And so we were bonding over that.
And then Britney was coming to me in a, in this really just
abrupt way. And then I was telling Alex
about it. And then I go to a, a comedy
show the other day, just like the other day, and the comedian
is like beatboxing and he goes, it's Britney bitch.
Out of the blue. I look at my cousin, 'cause I'm
there with him and I had told him about this and he just, his
eyes got real big and he's like, what the fuck?
So then the next night we go to a concert, we go to a concert,
an Everclear concert. They literally are like a pop
alternative or a pop punk alternative band from the 90s.
Like went to an Everclear concert.
They had some openers, the opener, I shit you fucking not,
literally covered baby one more time.
Oh my God. The very next days, the same day
the podcast had came out, like they the very first episode of
the season with a guest. And so I was with my cousin
again and I'm like, what the fuck?
You can't deny that what I told you about Brittany no longer
being here because he doesn't believe me.
Like he doesn't subject to like the conspiracies about
celebrities. Like he doesn't think that
people are being cloned and he doesn't believe.
He thinks some celebrities just get tired, want to go no and all
this shit. And I'm like, I'm not sure about
all that, but. Girl, you know what's what's
fucking crazy out of fucking nowhere.
I don't know if it was like 3 weeks ago or almost a month ago
at this point I was doing my hair and I get a random fucking
download telling me that Britney Spears is dead and I'm like why
the fuck am I getting this? So then I asked my cards and I
got that either she's about to die or she was already dead.
And then I just said, OK Spirit, if she's really dead, then the
next song that's going to play on my Spotify shuffle is going
to be a Britney Spears song and then a fucking Britney Spears
song played. So then I texted my friends and
I'm like, guys, I'm getting downloads that Britney Spears is
going to be next to die because we just had Hulk Hogan die and
Ozzy Osbourne die. And we were saying that they're
both fire signs and Britney Spears is a Sagittarius and
maybe she's next. So we, we went on this rabbit
hole about it. And my friend told me, you know
what's weird? I just went to Vegas recently
and they never played Britney Spears at the clubs.
But then they started playing one of her songs out of nowhere
and she goes, and now you're texting me this shit.
And I'm so set on it that I even made a fucking post about it.
Like, and I never post about like tarot readings about
celebrities and stuff like that or like predictions, but I was
so inclined to post it. Mark my fucking words,
something's going to come out because I don't know why I was
getting that download. You know, I'm telling you what's
so crazy is shout out Brittany. But when I first started my
spiritual journey and like, I have been a medium my whole
life, but like, I didn't know how to really harness it or
channel it. But I've been hearing voices
channeling fucking a lot of shit my whole life.
And that's why I did drugs and like numb things out as a child
and drank and partied and whatever.
And so like with Brittany, the thing that me and Alex were
touching on in our, you know, deep dive on that is like the
fact that we grew up with Brittany, you included.
You can't tell me shit was not this way.
Like the microphone, you can't tell me it wasn't there.
Bitch, I did it for Halloween. The skirt, you can't tell me she
didn't have a Plaid skirt on. You can't tell me that every
girl that dressed as a schoolgirl for the next 10 to 20
years for Halloween did not wear a Plaid skirt because they did.
Like the facts is like all of these changes and mandala
effects. I really do think our social
experiments, I think they are active participation from this
system that we are all consenting to, to in some way,
shape or form. And I do think that Britney's
consciousness has been siphoned and completely like erased.
I think that Britney Spears and the person that we see on those
videos is not her. That's not her.
That's not her at all. Not that I don't think that I
know that's not her, but I don't think she's a lot just like that
Sam guy, like I talked about this, but he, I never watch game
shows. I never watch TV.
Randomly every three months I'll find it a show and I'll watch it
and that'll be the end of it. Well, I had, I'd picked up a
celebrity client, which is what led me to the show.
I didn't know that she was on the fucking show though.
So I started watching the show. Then I found out Sam was on the
same season that she was on Sam Brittany's ex-husband.
So I'm like, what in the world is going on My clients on the
show never watch the show, never ever watch game shows, never
watch Hulu, the whole story. Now Sam's on here, so I'm like
Brittany is coming through once again, because I already told
like anytime I get a high profile client, I don't speak on
them, but when I get one, it's like a inner child healing
because like you're being seen by someone who a million
quatrillion people just wish they would just look their way,
spit whatever it is, you know. So like this show, I never I
didn't even know that she was on the show.
So it was like, I turn it on and Sam's on there and I'm like,
what the fuck? So like this Britney thing keeps
coming up and it keeps being confirmation of people,
practitioners, psychics, medium saying the same fucking thing.
Like we all know Britney is gone.
But like, what is the social experiment around Britney?
Like, what is it that they want millennials or people in this
age range to like be confused about when it comes to Britney
Spears? Because what I don't understand
is how Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton were all in the same era.
Britney being more famous, more successful, more, more
everything than them. But look how they've bounced
back like clones. And then we've got Britney
locked in a cage for years on end.
Same thing with Amanda Bynes. But like, where the fuck is the
real version of them? Because that girl that we see on
Britney's Instagram, I think is AI or is something else like I
think it's someone with a Britney filter on and they just
look like a crackhead or just it this makes them look like a
crackhead because that's not Britney.
Like plus like why would it Britney Jean Spears of all
fucking people, Why wouldn't she get a manicure?
Why wouldn't she get her makeup done?
Why wouldn't she have a makeup artist or a hair stylist or
someone? Why?
Why wouldn't she? You know, just me personally, I
feel like our generation millennials.
You're a millennial, right? Yeah.
I think we are catalysts because
when we look at our parents, our grandparents, they didn't do a
lot of the things that we started doing with technology
that like I think during our generation is when Google
started, correct. Yeah, so.
And I think like I was born, Google came out in like 96 or
something like that. Yeah, either 90 or 2006.
So our generation is a catalyst and I think what they want to do
is program us to dim ourselves and forget how powerful we are.
Because where we're headed with AI and the way the world is
changing, we can change that with our brain power, with our
skills, because we're, we, we're different.
We're the generation that started a lot of things that our
parents didn't start. And I think they want us to
forget that cuz Brittany was a fucking icon.
And now it's like she's looked at us crazy and psycho and
whatever, drug addicts. And I think that's what they
want us to think, that we're not powerful.
I feel like the Britney thing is about control.
I feel like it's also a representation of a humiliation
ritual, an energy harvest. Yeah, way of being.
Like if you don't play the game, this is what will happen to you.
Yeah. Because all she did was spiral
out and like shave her head. Look at all these other people
that have done crazier shit. I really do like this all
started because the Kanye West thing.
I also, I also feel the same about Kanye because when I first
started my spiritual journey, I'm not a Kanye fan, but when I
first started my spiritual journey, I really started
connecting with artists that I wasn't necessarily a super fan
of like Little Peep and different people who had passed
or like overdose or like quote UN quote, like whatever.
And then blew up after they died and someone's capping, just
straight capping in on their fucking estate.
And it makes you wonder like, why was little Peep like not
famous at all? Then the moment that he
overdosed, quote UN quote, he's super famous.
Well, like I would channel these people, they would come to me
and they would just straight up be like, yeah, I was murdered or
like, yeah, I was set up or like eat like Kurt is like been my
long time. Like Peep like that's like my
main guy. Whenever I like used to channel
and meditate and just be like, I didn't have a fucking client
inside, right? Like I didn't have no one
insight. Like I was just me and it was
like, you know, I look back at that and like some of those
messages and things like have really shaped where I'm at and
like where I was going and where like, it's, you know, hindsight
now. But like now I have a ton of
musician clients and like like real life clients or you know
what I mean? Like, so it's just weird.
Like the universally does align you.
But like, I don't know, the obsession, my obsession with
Britney Spears not being alive is coming from a sense of why
the fuck are you lying to me and my face and making me like, you
know, like, and I also am convinced that like millennials,
they just convinced all of us to hate our bodies.
All of us have body dysmorphia and all of us in some way have a
depression form of something like in some way.
Some kind of mental health issue.
Yeah. And that goes back to what I'm
saying. They want to dim our light like
we're catalysts. Our entire generation as a whole
has been catalystic in some way compared to other generations,
and they want us to forget that. So they want us to think that
we're ugly or overweight or incapable on some level,
mentally, emotionally, physically, whatever.
That's what they want. It's, it's control, like you
said. And, and it bleeds into
celebrities because that's who we see all the time, like on TV,
on social media. So that's a physical
manifestation of what the program, the government, whoever
is in charge of this planet is trying to do to our generation
and to human beings as a whole. You know, like they talk about
it and I've spoke on this before, but like a lot of
artists that have like came in and out of like the rap and R&B
culture or like game talk about like the rap to prison pipeline.
And they get paid more if they rap about things that are like
not above board, you know what I mean?
Like stealing and, and robbing people and like, you know,
whatever it may be. And what's crazy is like there
are a whole generation of people who have lost the, the family
unit over the last 50 years. And that's what's really
destroyed our society is like we're moving the family unit.
And I watched a documentary one time that was talking about like
back in like the 70s, they went into like low income areas and
all they needed to do was get a couple people hooked on drugs.
Because then it would remove a lot of like the men or the
mentors or the people from the community space and it would
leave children and women vulnerable.
That was like the whole method. It was the government that did
that. And it was the government.
So, you know, I personally feel like this is what I feel like
this reality is on a like a screen of some sort, holographic
screen, probably in another dimension.
We are on a season of something. Yeah, we are.
I also know this. We are not in 2025.
We are more in like the 16 to 15 ish range.
Like we're hundreds of years backwards.
They just like somewhere in there just inserted 300 years.
I don't know where the fuck they did it, but they did a few
different times and they talk about that some kings and people
did that when they didn't have an heir to their bloodline.
They would just change the timeline in different ways so.
I did not know that. Yeah, there's a lot of wisdom
that like, I'll be like gathering from the Akashic
records or just randomly like I didn't make it up and I didn't
read it anywhere because like, I kind of didn't.
I would blur the lines of where I got the information.
So then I stopped consuming information and I was still
getting the same amount of information and I stopped
sharing it. I stopped reading and I stopped
consuming all at the same time. And then I was still getting
just as much information. So like, I don't know, I feel
like my gifts have expanded far beyond just like greeting other
people and things like that. Even though I love doing those
things. It's like it is an energy drain
in most cases when people what I want to say, like they want you
to prove something to them or like they already know the
answer, but they're trying to get a different answer from you.
Like I don't really like you already know the answer.
Like why are you wasting your money?
Like, because I can feel like I love getting a client who's
excited and like, open and ready for the message, but there's
some people that book and they're just wanting a certain
message that maybe like they already kind of like, are hoping
for. And like you were mentioning
love readings earlier. I used to do a ton of love
readings and a lot of it came from TikTok.
And I was thinking about that earlier about how busy I used to
be with those love readings. But those were some of the most
draining readings. And they were all, yeah, they
were draining as fuck because you have to be careful what you
say to clients like that because you don't want someone to like
spiral out. But I also don't want someone
running back to a toxic situation.
So I've had someone book a love reading and be like, look, I'm
upgrading this to a higher self reading cuz that's not what you
need. Like and give a look.
Exactly. Yeah, no.
I totally get it, I it is draining to get someone booked
with you about the same dude or the same girl.
And it's like we read about the same person a month ago.
They have not changed. I don't know what you want me to
tell me to tell you this time around.
Like I want to talk about shadow work.
I want to talk about your childhood.
How can we heal you so we can align you to the right person?
How about that? Let's talk about where your
money's headed or what patterns are you repeating so that you
can get out of something like this.
Like that's what I want to talk about.
But I'm very honest with my clients and I tell them like
straight up what's going on. I don't sugarcoat.
I try to deliver it from a place of compassion because I don't
want them to feel like if I'm yelling at them or like telling
them, are you stupid or something?
No, like I'm like, you know, he's not for you For these
reasons. And yeah, I'm just getting to a
point where I'm tired of the love readings.
It's not for me. I'm all about healing,
empowerment, and moving forward. I feel like there's just there's
like the pipeline we're we're moving along with pipeline.
It really is like, and honestly, that's what pushed me away from
doing content on TikTok because I was, I'm so niched in that now
I'm in the 300 view graveyard because my niche of followers,
the people who followed me like they wanted like love readings,
twin flame reading, wanted me to tell them their toxic ex was
thinking about them or whatever. But the one thing I will say is
back then, I really would meditate and really would like
clock in on the collective and I would not just zoom in on like
toxicity. Like my readings were super
empowering. And I feel that's what the
evolution is, is like, you know, I got a lot of practice with the
love readings and like connecting with those videos and
posting like multiple videos a day and the excitement of like
when they would get like, you know, I remember one of my
videos got like 20,000 likes and I thought I was like, just hot
shit, you know, I was like, Oh my gosh, this is so cool.
But like, you know, there's so much that goes along with making
constant contact with the collective and that energy.
And it just really is something that like, I miss sometimes.
And then I'll be like, I'm going to start making a monthly
YouTube video and I have yet to do it.
And then when YouTube started to talk about they're going to take
people's ID's, I'm like, yeah, you got me so fucked up over
here. Like no.
What do you mean they're going to take people's ID's?
I haven't heard of that. Supposedly see I'm on like weird
conspiracy TikTok. So supposedly Spotify and
YouTube has like tried to announce that they're
considering or they are going to do it.
I don't know which one it is that they're gonna consider,
like having an AI program basically scan your account over
time and if they think that you're underage, you have to
upload your ID or they're gonna lock your account.
Oh, whatever, they're just coming up with that excuse
'cause. They want your scary because
they could. If it's an AI thing then it
could literally be anyone. And I've literally had my same
YouTube for like, I don't know a really long time.
So like, I don't know, like, you know, but a lot of these
platforms, I really do wish they would make them like so stupid
to be on. So we would all stop and then go
back to like communication in person because I really see
people in person who look like cool or whatever.
And like I'm very like, I'll approach people because I'm
always giving out stickers for the podcast or cards.
Like I'm always giving stickers away.
And like I've learned that if you give away badass like
metallic big stickers, people will take your card and they
smile and they even thank you. Sometimes I'm like, thanks.
Like they're so excited. But I do spend a lot of money on
stickers and not just give them to everyone I see.
But like with that being said, like there's so many cool people
out in the world that like they're not talking to each
other, you know what I mean? Yep, exactly.
It's because when you're posting content, you're putting yourself
out there, you putting in the effort and you're creating your
tribe. But if you're living, I guess, a
life different from a content creator working a nine to five
and then going home to your wife, husband or kids, you're
not giving yourself the opportunity to meet people that
are aligned with you. So unless they come across
Someone Like You that just shows up and opens up to them, they're
never going to find people like that because people are shy.
Especially nowadays with AI and the constant online and social
media communication, people are forgetting how to talk in
person. I had to add a service on my
site for a text only tarot reading because there's people
that get so shy to do a live tarot reading on the phone or by
Zoom or whatever, they get really shy.
So I had to add that as a service and I'm like, wow, I
never would have thought I would have to add something like this.
And I got that idea from a client because she's like, I'm
really shy. Can I just text you on here like
on Instagram? And I was like, what?
Like she's shy to speak on the phone.
Like I've never heard of that, but that's what it is like
today. I know, and it's honestly.
Crazy. Feel like they've like really
alienated people. I think, yeah, people are more
depressed because we are isolating and that what is truly
what we need is community. And which is why, like, sitting
down and being able to talk to someone and like, just like
yourself and be able to connect is so important.
And like, that's for the audience now is because everyone
is like loving the guest. So I'm just so grateful.
I feel like we could just talk for days on end.
So we'll just have to have you back in the future and we'll
have to talk about something else really cool because
everything's been great. And I just really want to say
like it's been so special. Just really finding another
person that I connect with on a deep level who I didn't know.
I just knew like I knew. Isn't that crazy?
Oh. And then you were like, Oh my
gosh, I'm so excited. And so that was cool because
sometimes like I'll ask people and you don't know if they're
excited or not or like sometimes they'll be like, sure, but
e-mail me or, you know, like they're like not engaging.
And like, so I appreciate it. Like I like when people, you
know, show their personality a little bit and at least engage
and like, you know, make you feel like they want to be there
kind of thing. Yeah, I really, really
appreciate you. And so in the description, you
all will have all of your contact information.
We'll put your website if you want to book a reading books and
spells, you want to book that removal that special.
Well, she was talking about that's on there.
So maybe her Oracle deck will be out by now.
We don't know if it I. Know.
If it is, you'll see it the details below.
But yeah, is there a message that you want to leave everyone
with today? I just want to say to put your
fear aside regarding anything in your life because had I lived in
fear, I would have still been at my probation officer job because
I was a probation officer. But now I'm a tarot reader,
possible Oracle deck owner, podcaster, I don't know.
But. And that's all because I put my
fear aside and I left that comfort of that 9:00 to 5:00 and
I pursued my passions. So if you're thinking of doing
this kind of work or a podcast or whatever, just do it because
you have nothing to lose besides, you know, it not being
successful, but you are going to be successful.
So yeah, put fear aside. That's all I want to say.
That's beautiful, you know, like you said, you really have
nothing to lose but fucking time.
Like alls we're doing is like we're spitting on a rock.
You know, we're floating in space and or may not know what's
out there because we don't. I do think that we're on a
screen somewhere like this is season 52 and they're like, what
the fuck is going on? And everyone's like gathered
around. So we will recall next time in
Candyland. Bye bye.
Candy Land, spicy and sweet. You're in for a tree.
Your wildest trees. Got gun drops of knowledge and
liquors too lump? Fancy picking for me and you,
Candy Land. Candy Land, a mystical play
where your shadows will meet your life face to face.
Let's your imagination run wild as stories unfold.
May you release anything that has a whole.
Welcome to Candy Land. Spicy and sweet.
You're in for a tree. You're wildest streams, gum,
drops of knowledge and liquorice too.
Thank you for joining us. May you find solace and grace.
Welcome to Candyland.