Welcome back to another episode of Lick it Like a Lollipop, the
podcast This week I'm joined by the Lizard Queen, Kelsey, I
welcome, beautiful. How are you I'm.
Doing great, Doing great. So me and Kelsey are just
Internet friends. Like I know that we live in the
same area, but we're just Internet friends.
We have a lot of the similar interest.
So I wanted to bring you on just to kind of talk to you about
like spiritual stuff, artistic stuff, and just pretty much
yourself, just you are as a person and what you have to
offer. So welcome.
Welcome to my virtual meeting room.
Have you done any podcast interviews before?
I've done 1 and it was a while ago and this this will be my
second. Awesome.
So would you consider yourself like an artist or a model or?
Probably an artist over model. My modeling kind of started so I
could use my pictures as references for my art.
So and then like it kind of got picked up and I started working
with professional photographers and that's kind of, but it
always has been my art. Gotcha.
So do you make like logos and stuff?
Yeah, I honestly, I've done everything.
Anything that you can create digitally or I do paintings as
well. So it's just kind of like I'd,
I'll do it all. I've done art covers, I've done
Flyers for local businesses, I've done T-shirt designs.
I just love creating. I really love the collaboration.
Could you ever see yourself being a tattoo artist?
I'm actually apprenticing. See look tattoo and I don't even
know the details. I've kept that a little low key
only because I'm not really like taking clients right now.
I'm I have a cousin that lets me tattoo on him.
So that's really the mostly the only real skin I work on.
I want to make sure that I'm I've got it down before I get on
people. Tattooing is such a, like, art
form that people don't take seriously.
Yeah, like, so many people just think like, oh, I'm going to
order a tattoo kit and we're going to do tattoos.
Like no, this is a blood ritual. You all so blood ritual.
I was actually bullied into it by my mentor.
I never, I was in the tattoo industry for like 5 years.
I was building tattoo machines, running the tattoo supply
company and the shop and then the owner of the shop decided he
didn't want to have a shop anymore.
I was kind of like, I don't know what I'm going to do.
I've been in the tattoo industry for five years, but I'm not a
tattoo artist, you know? And then my mentor, she was
tattooing there. She was like, well, you can draw
like, you can kill it. Like, come on, let's learn to
tattoo. And I was like, no, no, no.
But she eventually convinced me to do it and I love it.
It's awesome. I literally see that being a big
part of your path. Just as like a psychic who
really doesn't know you, I definitely see that as something
that you should stick with. Don't fucking tap out and get
scared down the road because it is a hard industry way into like
we've had several podcasts or several tattoo artists come onto
the podcast since we started, which now it's a solo project
for me, which, you know, people evolve, we grow apart.
And so I'm just grateful to still have this space because
I'm so interested and like artists and tattooers and models
and just anyone who's saying like fuck the system, I'm going
to do it my own way. Yeah, sign me up.
I love you. I'm right there with you on
that. Yeah, and that's kind of like,
you know, I know we've never met in person, but we've worked with
a lot of the same photographers and stuff like that.
But I love your modeling but I don't even know how I found you
like. Say the same thing about yours
for they're grand friends for so long.
I feel like we've been like liking each other's shit for
years and everything. You know, and I've always
thought, like, me and you could like, we we could hang out,
like, we could be good friends, like just with what you post and
who you are and like, you're very, like, outspoken when you
do speak on stuff. But then you're like, kind of
like me. You don't comment on everything.
Yeah. You know, I don't make my page a
political page, even though it's always fuck the government, It's
always fuck the system. Like, but there's so many things
that I've seen you and I, like, agree on over the years.
Yeah. And also another thing that I
respect about you is, like, keeping your shit private until
it's more grounded and rooted, because you're right about that.
Like you can't share your good news with everybody.
No, but I don't really like to share my stuff until it's done
and then it's kind of easier for me like posting content wise
because then I'm not like. And that's probably why I
haven't been posting this much lately because I've just been
working and I haven't been creating as much as I really
want to. But I like to have stuff done
first so I can like easily put stuff out instead of like
feeling stressed to like get it, get it, get it.
Yes, I feel like I get really motivated and I will just be
like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
And for months I'm just like, yeah, I'm good.
Like now that it's July and it's hot outside, I will not be doing
any outdoor photo shoots. Like if you don't have air
condition, don't call me. No, actually one of the worst
photo shoots that I've ever done, which the pictures came
out great. And the photographer is my now
boyfriend and we were not dating at the time, but he was like,
hey, you want to shoot? And I'm like, sure, we go out in
95° weather and I'm like, there's no way any of these
pictures are going to turn out good at all.
And it's kind of like something we joke about now.
It's like, yeah, it's 95°, you want to go out and shoot.
So is that how you and your boyfriend met was through
modeling or like through photography?
Actually, no, because he, he didn't want to ever date anyone
that he had taken pictures of because you know, the stigma
that goes with photographers, you know, they're dating their
models and all this stuff. I actually met him because I was
moving and I put something on the Instagram.
I was like, I have no one to help me move these big things
like I need help, need help. He was one of the only people
like just off Instagram like came up and helped me and I was
like, this is he's like real cool.
So we started hanging out after that.
We shot a couple times and we just started hanging out more
and more and you know, that's how it goes.
I love that. You know, I think so many
connections are literally being blocked because one person won't
speak up and like shoot their shot.
Like there are so many people who I feel like want to say
something, whether it's a compliment, whether it's a
question, whether it's an invitation and they just don't
do it. And it's that.
I'm I'm the one that's not talking.
I'm not going to lie, not say anything.
You definitely got to be the person that's going to like,
make me talk about it. Really.
Yeah. Like I'm very much like I shoot
my shot kind of person. And I think the podcast has
really helped me do that because when you have big creators who
are like, hell yeah, I'll come on to your podcast and and talk
to you about my only fans or whatever the fuck, you know,
like, you know, we get on here and like there's people like,
yeah, I had a BBL and like you just wouldn't even know that
unless they told me that, you know, like there's always been
so many different occurrences where I've made really great
friends through this project. And that's why I like when
things started going South with the Co host, I was like, you
know what? This this is going to be like,
it's going to keep going. Like, I'm coming up on the
project because there has been people like yourself that I
talked about coming on the podcast a long time ago.
Like, you know, there's just different people in the past
that I used to brainstorm. Like, they're creative, they're
cool, they're funny. I want to talk to them.
And it's really a way to like, form relationships with people
through art, like whether it's photography, through tattooing,
through music, through podcasting, Like it is such a
way to like, create new bonds that you normally would not
have. I agree.
I think it's a big connection
industry, which Loki was kind of one of the hardest parts about
it for me because it's like I'm not as social as I am online in
real life. So it's it's like that part of
it was very hard to be like, OK, you need to like start network
networking, meeting people, you know.
But now like that is a really fun part for me because like you
said, you meet people that like you would have never met before
they had. You have the same like mindset.
Yeah, yeah. And that's why I, like, I always
tell people like, we're just gonna shoot the shit.
Like it's literally like we're just hanging out.
Like we're on a FaceTime. There's no pressure.
I don't have any questions. I'm literally like loving the
vibe of just going with the flow lately where, you know, instead
of having all these moving parts for an interview to come
together, now it's just me being like, hey, are you free?
Hey, I'm ready. Hey, what's up?
Like you wrote me yesterday. I was like, are we still
recording? Like it's so like taking off the
pressure of trying to like get multiple people to schedule and
move all these parts around. And I'm literally like loving it
because I'm always like just able to connect with people on a
deeper level because it gives you a spotlight that, like you
said, you're not allowing people to have that lens into your
life. So this is like super special.
And I love that you, you know, decided to come on.
So as you're moving through your tattoo apprenticeship, how do
you utilize the art that you want to create with the art that
you're being asked to create? It's, it's actually a big thing
in the tattoo industry. It's I think being in the
industry for five years, I've watched artists really struggle
with it. They a lot of artists want to do
what they want to do. I think maybe because I've come
at it from like an artist that does designs into tattooing,
that part of it's kind of fun for me.
I like, I really enjoy collaborating with people and
like them giving me an idea and I'm like, oh, I see it, let me
draw it. And they're like, well, can you
do some a little different? Yeah, absolutely.
Let me mix this up. I like the challenge of it.
But that is a big thing in tattoo.
And I know a lot of people have gone to shops and they've said,
like, you know, I don't like this or I want this move.
Then the tattoo artist makes you feel bad about it.
And I just, I don't like those vibes.
Like if I feel like if you're a good artist, you can collaborate
with anybody and anybody's ideas.
Yes, and that's kind of like with my artist Q He and I have
built such a relationship and a friendship that like I trade
readings for tattoos and like mediumship services for tattoos.
Like I haven't bought a tattoo in so long like and I forget
that people have to like budget for tattoos.
I know that sounds bad and I'm not being cocky all, but like I
forget that people are legitimately saving up for a
tattoo because if I want a tattoo, he's just like, hell
yeah, let's start a project. My mom wants a reading my you
know, my friend wants a reading. Like I always tell him that he
gets like VIP because I don't do in person readings.
Not that I can't, I just choose not to.
It's so much energy. There's a lot more intensity to
it and instead of just like, oh, reading's over, I'm going to
close my computer and move on. It's like, oh, the person's
here. You know, until recently he
traded me two scorpions, one for his friend and then one for him.
And I'm just like, yeah, you see my new tattoos I traded for him.
And like, it just makes me feel like my your child is thriving.
Yes, no, that's something I love about industries like this is
you can like trade your trade, like you don't have to take
money like you could like if I could find, you know, someone
that do my eyelashes for tattoos, like you bet I'm going
to do that. If I can find someone that's
going to do my nails, like absolutely.
Like let's do it like it's the coolest thing about working.
I guess you'd say like a non corporate and industry.
Yeah, and a lot of people don't realize that I am ready for you
to shoot your shot and trade whatever with me.
Like, oh, you have teeth on a necklace?
Call me over there because I want some of it.
And, you know, recently my my nail girl was like, hey, babe, I
really need a reading. Do you want to trade?
And I was like, hell yeah. So later that day was actually
my appointment. And when I showed up, she was
like, no wonder you asked if you want, if I want you to bring
your cards. I didn't realize you were coming
today. And I'm like, well, I thought
that's why you messaged me at 6:00 this morning.
She said, no, something was just heavy on my heart.
And I just wanted to ask you. And I'm like, well, here I am.
And so it just like worked out so perfectly.
But like, it really fuels my inner child to like be able to
trade something that I'm good at for something that you're good
at or like what you're doing. And so many people have amazing
skills and amazing talents, but they're not even seeing that
it's not about the money, it's about the quality and the
experience. Like a lot of people will pay
more to me for something because of the quality and the
experience they can expect. Same thing with a tattoo.
Like there's people out there charging $500.00 for 1/4 sized
piece and $50.00 for 1/4 sized piece.
It's just like it's an evolution.
And when you believe in your art, I really believe other
people believe in your art too. I agree.
What is the craziest thing that
you have seen working in the tattoo industry for five?
Years. God, I've seen so much.
The craziest thing is probably always going to be, and this is
probably cliche of me, but people getting other people's
names tattooed on them. Every time.
I'm shocked. Every time.
I don't like the whole tattoo shop is going to try to convince
you not to do it. They're getting there and it's a
curse. It's a curse.
You get someone's name, you ain't getting up together.
I've seen a guy come in three separate times and get 3
different names with the girl sitting next to him.
Brought him into the same tattoo shop.
And that's always awkward because like obvious like what
are you? You're going to be like, hey,
he's been here before, you know, like.
Like, how's Janet? And they're like, this is Tanya.
And we're like, oh, OK. I seen this one guy came in,
he'd been with the girl for a month and got Caitlyn of like
from hip to hip, like huge. I'm talking like the big one of
the biggest tattoo name tattoos I've ever seen just across his
body just. I have been in relationships
where people have tattooed my name.
I don't know why, but I will also let you all know that there
were drugs involved. OK, like there were drugs
involved. It's.
Never a same thought like and don't get me wrong, like I've
I've gotten tattoos for people I've been in relationships with,
but I also like knew I was going to end up covering it.
So and I didn't get a name. I got like a little symbol that
was like something that I could work into something else.
Yeah, I personally think it's crazy work, but when I was about
19, I had a boyfriend who did like house tattoos, like
straight up, he did house hats. And I thought that I could just
watch him do those long enough. And I don't draw you all like I
do not fucking draw. OK?
I watched this man and then decided that I was going to give
it a run. Not only did one consenting
adult agree, 3 consenting adults let me and I could see like you
draw. You could be like, look at my
artwork me baby, I don't do those things.
So like the fact that you would even trust me, even just a
little bit with your skin shows that you need to really go to
therapy because like, no free tattoo is worth it looking like
shit or giving you a blood borne disease or illness, right?
What the fuck was I doing? And you know what's crazy is
like, OK, so I did a heart. You know, when all the girls
would get hearts on their hip? That was fine, that the heart
was perfect. I nailed it.
But then I did a star and that shit was fucked.
And then the fact that I did the star that was fucked and then
someone else was like, you know what?
I want five stars across my chest.
Oh my God. I did it and then one of my
friends actually dated the guy who had the stars across his
chest and she told me that in instead of getting them covered
up he had someone add like some clouds and some shit around it
and added on to it. No, because that was my next
question was I was going to say, did he cover it?
That sounds awful. No, he did the craziest thing
and added to what was already there.
And I mean, like I said earlier, I'm a little like out of realm
when it comes to what tattoos cost and how expensive they are.
Because yes, they are very expensive, but there ain't no
way in hell I would save my money every day before I would
just let anyone. Literally, I always, I always
think it's so funny when people get hung up on it, how expensive
tattoos are, because one, that's the artist's price.
Like what? How are you going to argue with
them? That's what they've said.
And then two, you're getting something permanent on your
body, like, Oh my God, you would spend more on a bag or like AT
shirt or clothes that you're gonna like get rid of eventually
or lose. Like this is something forever.
Why would you not want to spend the most money on your body?
You know that's how I feel with people in like hygiene.
People do not realize what the fuck women spend to look nice
like eyebrows tinted and wax. 50 if you get lashes, 150 you get
snails. 150 you get a spray tan, which I don't add another 50,
you know, you get your hair highlighted and if it's my
length and you go to a shop in Louisville, 300 plus dollars.
So right there is just maintenance.
Like that's $1000 of maintenance.
That's not like, oh, I wanted to get a little filler or oh, I
want to get Botox. Like people don't realize and we
talked about this on other episodes, but like the only
people I see hating on filler and Botox are people who really
can't afford it or or shocked that it's that expensive.
Yes, there are people that overdo it, of course.
Yeah, always. See either.
Like the haters on it when it's literally a maintenance thing.
Like there are so many things that just not even gender
specific that are maintenance that some people just choose not
to maintain. They choose not to.
And then those same people will be on mine or your post talking
about talking shit you know or whatever.
Like it blows my mind. It's always people who literally
look like a thumb or like the bottom of the shoe that have
something to say about women and their fillers and their bodies.
I love. Those videos I see where people
like take the comments where someone said awful and then just
zoom in on their profile picture.
It's like, all right. No seriously, and like, I have
thought about like like reciting my DMS in a theatric way, but
some of the shit that is said to me would get me banned, you
know? To God, people are crazy online.
People get so bold behind the screen.
Yes, yes. And like, I don't get it.
Because what's wrong with our generation is lack of
communication, like lack of transparency.
Like it's really easy to be like I'm not looking for anything
serious. I just want to cuddle.
I want emotional receptiveness and some sex or whatever.
But like, I don't want to date you.
Like, it's so easy to say that because probably.
Probably 90% of the time, that person's still going to hang out
with you. You're just going to be happy
that you at least didn't lead them on.
Or like, you know, when I see women online especially talking
about, like, my man never does this, but I always do.
And it's like this laundry list of things.
I'm like, no, yeah. No, no, I like, I like it.
First of all, we were talking about maintenance.
I I'd be damned, I'd be fucking damned if I pay all this money
and do all this stuff and a man doesn't do nothing like you
better like have it some type of good hygiene.
Like my I have such high standards when it comes to the
man I'm dating's hygiene. I swear, because I'm put like
you said, I'm putting all this money into looking good like and
you're just washing with soap in the back.
No, you, you at least have a face routine.
You know what I mean? You got to be taking care of
yourself too. Like it's that shit kills me.
Yeah, I think so many people have like, increased their
standards for women in general and then like, men don't have
these standards like that. Are we dating the same guy
group? Like why are you all fighting
under like for the troll under the bridge right now?
I love that group. I'd be eating those posts up.
Oh my God, that the drama on that the and that you know, I've
never been really like in the dating scene of you know,
Louisville and it is crazy. Y'all got me scared on these
pages. Like it is a whole nother realm.
Like I I've never experienced some of the stuff these girls
are going through with these, like leave them alone, that
there's no redeeming qualities there.
You know, a lot of women don't realize that they are actively
activating generational curses by dating these people.
Like I used to say, because I can be very self aware and see
that my taste in men was a form of self harm.
That's what that was like. It wasn't oh, I didn't have
confidence or oh I didn't love myself.
No, it was an active form of self hatred.
Like the men I dated was an active form of self harm.
Like instead of starving myself, I just did this, you know, like
self harm knows no limits. And that is what my dating
history has been. So if I've ever dated you and
you're listening, you need therapy.
Like if you hear this, like check in, tap in baby.
Because yes, you are so right. And those groups literally were
giving me such a bad, bad stigma around men that I muted the
group. And then whenever the mute went
away, I realized that they had deleted me.
So I took that as like, a line from the universe that I really
needed to stop seeing that because I already have my own
experiences that, like, disgust me.
But now we're seeing the bombshell beautiful women.
So this one Hispanic girl on there was the prettiest girl I
have ever seen in my life. And she had, like, the gas
station white dude. And everybody was like, yeah, he
was at my house. Yeah, he's got my kid.
Oh, my God. He stole from me.
He took my grandma's pills like. No, because you're not lying
because I'm on there and like it has not changed my opinion to
admit I can tell you that it has it like it's like, it is truly
terrifying to see the way that some people are treated in a
relative because it's like, that's not a relationship.
Like you are trapped. You are trapped.
Yeah, and it's a form of self harm, like surrounding yourself
with someone who is constantly exposing you to disease and
sickness. And I have friends who work in
the healthcare field and they have straight talked about like
the outbreak of herpes in this city.
Like they're like, it's not just, oh, the common, everyone
has the common thing. They're like, no, they have the
active 11 that's spreading it. They have it.
And they're not like people don't use protection.
Like it's crazy. It's like if you know you have
stuff like that, like you need, you need to be, it's like not
consentful to talk to somebody about that shit before you
engage in having sex with them. Like that's crazy.
Yeah, and I saw this, one of my guy friends is kind of like the
therapist for his like friend group and they're in their 40s,
like he's like in his mid 40s. And he sent a screenshot where
this girl had been dating this guy and she was basically
wanting my friend to kind of talk her off the ledge.
But she'd been dating this guy for like 6 months and kept
getting like BV or like some kind of something.
And so her body was literally giving her the signs.
Well she just kept going and getting medicine and like
treating it. Whatever.
We'll come to find out the whole time her and this man are not
using protection and she has full blown herpes.
And so my boyfriend was like, so he doesn't care about what you
have? And she said no, none of these
guys care. That's what no, seriously, and
like I'm telling you, and it's people always talk about like if
girl shit stinks, you know, if if you are like smelling, that's
your man's fault. Like you like, if you're taking
care of yourself and you have a problem that is consistent, you
really need to find out what's going on because that is like
your body telling you that something is wrong and something
is not right. Yeah.
And I'm in this other women's group, I think it's called like
the high maintenance female or something like that.
And it was basically talking about your body will create its
own bacterias to protect you, and it will be literally
rejecting someone else's bodily fluids or chemistry.
And they were talking about like, not everyone's fluids and
everyone's bodies are even compatible.
So the whole time your body is like activating all of these
issues, it's because it's trying to tell you, hey, this isn't
right. This isn't for you.
Like this shit is this shit. That man alone.
I'm telling you like being on a celibacy journey.
I was on a celibacy journey for like 3 years and then last
summer came off of it, had sex 1 fucking time and got pregnant.
And then luckily I had a miscarriage, which was for the
better. But I'm talking like this was
the the talk that when you're like 15 and you're so scared of
getting pregnant. That's what happened to me.
Like the ripe age of 30 something years old.
I'm literally like, Oh my God, I know I'm pregnant and I'm like,
Oh my God, I'm so scared like and I'm like 30 something years
old, like scared to death. And it's just wild because the
woman's body is like, it's like a radio frequency.
Like if you're in the right frequency, you're going to be
healthy and happy and whole. But if you're in the wrong
frequency, baby, you're going to be sick, you're going to be
tired, you're going to be irritable.
Like people don't realize a males DNA can literally change
your internal DNA especially when you get pregnant.
Yes, Oh my gosh. My sister just had a baby and I
watched her let her body change and like the way her hormones
changed and she actually had preeclampsia which was like the
scariest thing in the world. I will never forget how swollen
her legs were like I literally thought her legs were going to
burst open. It was the most scariest thing I
have ever seen. I remember she she would have to
wear compression socks because she literally could not walk
around and it she's always been like a lot smaller than me.
So it was like crazy to see her body change so quickly and like
so tremendously. And she would take these socks
off and me and her boyfriend would just scream because there
would be this crazy like where the sock that was squeezing her
like the most crazy indention I have ever seen.
I can't even explain how like swollen she was.
And it's like, I was just like, oh, my God.
Like, they tell you that your body changes and everything like
that, but they don't really explain it.
They also don't explain that your hormones start changing
immediately, and they don't go back until, like, years later.
Yeah. So you're like a different
person for years because of it. Honestly like I just had that
pregnancy scare and was only pregnant for like 2 months.
No. And my shit was fucked.
Yeah, it's not working itself out.
It's. It doesn't matter if you have an
abortion or a miscarriage or anything.
Literally the moment you become pregnant, your hormones are
different. For years, yeah.
It's like, honestly, what was so weird about it is because like,
you know, I had went to the doctor so I had a due date.
So like all the way up until that due date, I literally still
felt like I was forming this life or even just kind of like
grieving it in a different way, even though, like ironically, I
was very grateful. Like it happened.
It wasn't a boyfriend. It was just like a hookup.
Like it was just the worst case scenario that it could have
been. Now, like so many people are
like you speaking about this so openly and not like being
depressed or letting it upset you or trigger you.
Like it's super healing for me because so many women go through
these changes alone, whether they're pregnant and their
partner doesn't understand or they're alone and they don't
have a partner partner. Like people don't realize what
women do to keep this population intact.
It's a nut. It's nuts.
Suffering. After that happened to me like
now I am not sure I even want a kid.
Like I'm just not sure. Go through and I'm like, girl,
you have traumatized me. I didn't really want kids before
that, but now it looks. Terrifying.
Yes. And you know, it's good thing
that, like, she had you and her boyfriend because so many women
battle this shit. Yeah.
And it was too, because my, my mom was also very worried about
her and how swollen she was. And you know, she's like, you
need to tell your doctor you have preeclampsia.
Like you need to tell. And like, she spoke out to the
doctor several times and they're like, no, no, no, you're fine.
You're fine. And she didn't get diagnosed
with it until she went into labor.
And they were like, Oh yeah, you have preeclampsia.
Like, we're going to have to handle this now.
And she asked multiple times. Yeah, I personally need to have
a really fat like labor and delivery fund because I will
never have labor at a fucking hospital.
Like I only had to meet with a doctor once and this is like I'm
literally like it feels like 4 1/2 days pregnant.
I'm like 4 1/2 weeks pregnant. This old ass man who has been my
OBGYN but will no longer be looks me.
He looks me up and down. We get into the room and he
goes, yeah, if you have to have AC section, I'm going to have to
cut through all these tattoos right here, He said.
Artists really need to tell people having stomach tattoos
could affect you. I'm sorry Sir, I'm basically
four days pregnant and you're talking about AC section that
I'm not having because that's not even in my cards.
Like they literally set women up for failure.
Like they do not give a fuck. Like, and then there's a website
that you basically can read reviews for doctors, kind of
like glass door is for jobs. And I started reading it and it
was talking about women who gave birth.
And this man was like the filling CEO and or the filling
CEO, the filling guy, that delivery guy.
And they were like, his bedside manner was awful.
He was just so rude. And I'm just like, why is a man
like that delivering babies? That makes sense.
It is like such a crazy medical thing that happens.
Like it is a huge procedure like and to be like have attitude
like that or like and be that way is so crazy to me.
Like why are you here? Like, do you want to be here or
do you like it's for the money? Yeah, it's literally scarred me.
And just like the initial situation just has completely
put me in a position where it's like it's really going to have
to be in alignment because we're back on the celibacy journey.
And men, like I honestly think Spirit had me go through that so
I could go back into like the men disgust me era.
And like, you really need to up your shit and like rise to the
occasion. Like there's no more coming down
here to meet you all below the screen where you're at.
You know what I mean? Like we're not going that
anymore. Like we're done so with your
your sisters. So she had her baby.
Yep. Baby and everything was good.
And he's a little cutie. Good.
Best in. I love that, I love that.
So I wanted to talk about your only fans.
Do you still have only fans? So I'm saying this and it cracks
me up. I'm retired.
I've retired from Only Fans. Oh my God, it's so funny.
I've actually, I started my only Fans in 2019 so and that was
like when it was like first kind of starting to become
mainstream. And I really was doing it
because I it was the only space I felt that I could post my
uncensored art because I do draw nudes.
So I can't post stuff on Instagram yet.
I really don't love Twitter that much.
Like I'm more it's just, you know, I'm not putting it on
Facebook. Like I just didn't have a space
to put that. And most of my art is based off
of my nudes. I take some fire ass nudes and
my thinking back then and that still is now like someone's got
to see these, like these are someone's got to see this
picture and I still like that. But over the years it kind of
turned into me just like making customs, I guess you would say.
I've never put any like sex videos or like penetration or
anything like that. That wasn't like my jam.
No hate sex work is work. Like do you?
For me, I didn't want to do that.
I really, but what I did was essentially like transition
videos but instead of a new outfit, I'm Naked.
My God, I just enjoyed making those.
They're really fun and I needed somewhere to post them.
And that's kind of what started my Only Fans.
And then I had a video that went viral.
I think I got over 1,000,000 views on it because I had nipple
rings, literally because I had nipple rings there.
It is a transition video where I kind of my hair's a little
frizzy and then I flip it and it's straight and you can see my
nipple ring. So I got over 1,000,000 views on
that and I think I got up to like 25,000 followers and I made
over $5000 in two days. It was crazy because I already
had that only fan set up, so like they were just going to it
and like buying my stuff and everything.
I think this was in 2022 or something like that.
But quickly realized that I kind of had a cap on it because I
wasn't making super sexual videos and I would like that's
what people want out of only fans.
That's just not what I was doing.
So it's it's not, it's a good space for sex work and I support
that, but it's not the space that's where I really want to
be. So I'm, I deleted my only fans
and I'm going to maybe move over to like a Patreon.
I haven't really decided where yet, but I want, I really want
to be able to focus more on my art.
Yeah, Patreon I've had for about four years as kind of like a,
it's like a subscription base for my readings and stuff like
that. And I used to do a lot of
community circles and I do like a healing spell every month.
And so Patreon recently in the last few years started allowing
sex work on there, but you have to sign it up as an explicit.
But honestly, I love Patreon. It's just one of those things
where like every month I know that I'm going to have at least
$1000 coming in from Patreon period, no matter what.
It is a lot of work for me to keep up with every little thing
I do on there because I had the bright idea to like make a tear
for every fucking thing and like have tears, you know, from $11
to $200. And like ironically, the bigger
tears are where people book and and stay consistent, like $50
and above because the prices are so much better like if you're on
a subscription obviously than if someone just buys it one time.
So I do recommend Patreon. I think it's a really good
platform just for all forms of content, like if you want to
talk to people directly or if you want to do a live stream or
if you want to like post videos or photos, like it lets you do
whatever. We'll say that they have gotten
so greedy though, because of course, like iOS wanted a cut of
like the app fees. So like if they sign up on the
website, iOS gets cut out, but if you like sign up through the
App Store it will literally charge them an extra 30%.
So like it's 30 and so you can either like set that up or the
30 is going to come out of your money or their money.
It's a mess. None of my clients do it that
way because every month I stress like make sure you go to Safari
or go to a web browser, Google, whatever and and do it through
there. Do not do it as the App Store is
prompting you. But I think that only fans
really got such a bad stigma because there are a bunch of
people like yourself that like, never did penetration videos or
videos. Like I constantly get told to
make it only fans because I have a ton of modeling that's like,
yeah, you're not ever going to see it.
And I have modeling pictures from like before I started
getting tattooed. And I mean, I know this sounds
weird, but like I'm like 1819 in those pictures.
And I know that's what these weirdos like.
Like that's what they want. So I'm like, maybe one day I'll
just collect it all and then I'll do like an archive of like
through the years. I like encourage people who want
to post sexy content to make an only fans like I.
It's just I wasn't focusing on my art.
I was more focused on the making money.
And then it was like I was just kind of throwing together these
videos and like, and it started with me just I think essentially
what it was I was. Making videos for men instead of
making nude videos I enjoyed. So I want to get back to like
making the content I had fun making versus like, oh, let me
make this real quick so I can get this money.
Yeah, yeah, whenever I saw like the ratio of what Only Fans
takes, it's fucking crazy. Like 1 girl.
But yeah, so funny because you can't even say Cash App.
You can't say like if you type Cash App into only fans, they'll
like pop up and be like, hey, we'll, we'll ban your account If
you say Cash App again, like you can't.
They want their money so bad. They take like a percentage of
everything. Yeah, I saw a girl post like her
messages and it was like sent 40 received 22 more than you get.
Damn. I'm like, they're hot.
Yeah, you and that's the that's the thing too, that no one
realizes. Like if you really want to make
money on only fans, because I've been like I've been in spots
where I didn't work for a full year because I was doing just
only fans and I wasn't rich. I wasn't like making hella
money, but I also didn't have to work and I was paying my bills
and I had my nails done and I was going out to eat and I was,
you know what I mean? Like it was.
And then I've had times where I haven't made shit and I'm like,
why am I posting and this stuff? Why?
And I'm not even making money. So it's just kind of like you
have to be consistent with it, but also you have to have such a
big following on there to make actual money because of the
percentages they're taking. You basically have to be selling
multiple things a day or you're not going to like really
accumulate a big amount. Yeah, I think the one person
that I know that really ran a check on Only Fans was Bunny XO.
Like that bitch came out and was top creator and now she's doing
that on Patreon with 300,000 subscribers like that woman.
And her work ethic has translated whether we're doing
sex work, podcasting, TV shows, reality TV, whatever it is.
And that's what I fucking love about it is like she's taught me
to like stay consistent with what you're passionate about in
the that it's no longer fun for you.
Fuck it, cut it out. That's where I'm at right now
and that I have such a hard time staying consistent.
And I, and that's kind of why I've kind of like held off on
making a Patreon because I'm like, OK, if I'm going to do
this, like I'm going to do the subscription, everything.
Like I've got to give people what they're paying for.
I've got to know that I'm going to be posting this shit.
I'm going to be working on my art and doing this.
And it's like, so it's I'm still kind of getting there, but I'm
feeling it click into place. Like it's just the motivation is
so hard. I'm gonna blame.
Honestly, if you did like a $10 flat subscription and you just
posted whatever you wanted and then you could do like higher
subscription tiers for more intricate, you know, whatever
type of content. But I always recommend people to
like establish it because you will be shocked on how many
people who will just give you $10 A, a month to just like
watch a few different little time lapse videos of you
drawing. Or you know, like I never
dreamed that my Patreon would still be bringing me such an
income four years later. And I went through this like
phase this year where I just didn't want to do readings for
strangers anymore and just like completely took all of my
services down off my website for like 3 months.
And then when I came back, my prices were like triple.
And so like now it's really only super aligned people coming into
that space. But with Patreon, some of those
people have been writing like since the beginning, but I've
never done a price increase. So like if they were paying $50
four years ago, they're still paying $50.
But you know, it's nice because I'm able to take a step back
from my business, but my business bills still get paid
through Patreon. And it's just like, I mean, I
have a full time job too. So like I've never had to do my
business just for like everything.
Because like you said earlier, if you're just creating for
money, it takes the fun out of it.
Yeah, it really does. And and I hated that I got into
that space. It was so draining.
I didn't want to do it. I was like, Oh my God, I have to
make some content. I don't want to do this.
And I, and I don't know, I'm everyone I sent stuff to, they
were like, Oh, I love this, you know, whatever.
And I'm like, how like I didn't put no effort into this.
I slapped this together and I hated that I was doing that too.
I was like, there's no passion in this anymore.
So it's I'm, I'm excited for like the new chapter of it to
get back to what I really enjoyed.
What do you think is the hardest thing?
Is it like imposter syndrome? Is it money and like real life
concerns? Or like, what hinders you from
really pursuing your art fully? I, I, I know exactly what it is.
It's, I have such a hard time separating like my work life and
my real life. Like I have a very good work
ethic and when I'm working, I'm going to put my all into it.
And so I had kind of gotten to the point where like when I can
tattoo full time, I can create while I'm not tattooing.
Like I'll be able to like put all my focus into that.
But you know, you know, how did you got to make money still?
And like, if I get a job, I've just getting up and staying on
the schedule and doing that kind of stuff.
I have to put my energy into that or I won't get that done
either. So it's kind of finding a happy
medium and being able to do both is so hard for me.
Yes, and that's kind of where I went with spirituality.
Like I would literally do everything for everyone else.
Like I'm like, why the fuck do I have all this energy that I'm
pouring out? And it's just for money.
Like it was just and great. Gratefully I was able to like
pay off my car and pay off my student loans and pay off a lot
of other debt and a lot of other things.
So like Spirit kind of told me like, we're going to make you
really busy to pay off all your debt.
And then it's going to be really quiet and you're going to go
into this thing where you're like, am I good enough?
Am I doing enough? Am I good enough?
Am I doing enough? And so I've kind of been there
where it's like trying to find that balance between like, OK, I
have a fucking job already. I'm working that, how do I keep
this fun? Because there was a time where
even the podcast with my previous business partner was
starting to feel like fucking work and starting to feel like
stressful. And for those that have a
podcast or even know about them, you don't make any money.
You spend more money than you're ever going to make on your
podcast unless you get to millions of streams a month.
Yeah. Well, you have that Spotify
ain't giving you shit. Like I think one of my friends
who's an artist averaged out like a million streams on one
song is like $3000 or less is all you're going to make off
that. Insane.
Yeah, because like 1,000,000 views on Snapchat is like
they're about to pay you a million.
They have like someone made the chart where like what 1,000,000
views on every platform means and like, the only one you're
actually getting paid on is Snapchat.
It's fucking hard to get 1,000,000 views on Snapchat
versus TikTok or Facebook. Not that hard.
I know I've had people actually ask me like how do you not have
money? Especially because I think I
only have like 13 followers right now.
It's actually so funny. Every time I post a picture of
me and my boyfriend you lose like 1000 followers.
It's I love watching it drop. It's hilarious to me.
But I think I started off with like 25,000 and people be like,
how do you don't have money? How do you don't have money?
I'm like, I don't know why you think just because I have
followers on a social media page and that means I'm making money.
Like that's not how that works. So many people are veiled by
that illusion. And like I've told people, 15
likes is a lot. Because if you have 15 people in
your fucking living room, in your car, on your health
insurance, maybe that's a lot. That's a lot of money.
That's a lot of people, you know, like if we have 15 people
in this room right now, it would be stressful.
Like it'd be like so much, so many people equate followers as
success, but I've noticed I've lost, I've blocked a lot of
people, but I've lost like 1000 followers because so many people
are like moving off of Meta and completely deleting their
platforms. And there's another option on
your follower count now where it'll show you how many people
have deactivated their profile. Oh yeah, yeah, I was talking
about that with my friend the other day.
It's so interesting. There's like hundreds of people
on that list. I think right now mine's sitting
at like 400 followers already activated.
So it deducts those from your follower account.
So I just think all of it's an illusion.
Like there's so many things. Like I remember when TikTok
first was popping they were paying like they were paying.
I had like 40,000 something followers.
It's the same followers I've had the whole time.
And I remember I used to get like $400.00 cash outs every
other month from TikTok, like, and, and what was great about it
is you did not have to give them your social and like all these
crazy fucking documents. And that's the thing with
Facebook and like Meta, I'm not giving you my government name.
I'm not giving you my Social Security number.
We're already threatening to ban my account anyways from what I'm
posting, so like, why do you want all this information from
me? Yeah, like, no, thank you.
I promise you, the moment social media starts requiring a fucking
authorization by your Social Security number, I'm out.
Because like AT&T already leaked every everyone's socials at the
beginning of the year. Like I'm good on it.
Like I am so good on Meta having that information.
Like I constantly am being invited to their creator
programs and I'm like the I. Know I still refuse to buy the
blue check because I'm like, I remember when that meant you
actually made it like you and that now you can just buy it
like I'm not buying that. No, I think that's fake, phony
loser shit. Like I had a lot of scammers and
a lot of fake profiles scamming people for money.
That would be the only reason it would make sense.
Yeah, would buy it. But I'm not giving you my
government name. I'm not putting my government
name on my profile because in order to get that you have to
put it on your profile. Yeah, no.
And I'm, I'm not doing that because I'm terrified to get a
stalker. Like I know what I'd be posting
online. Like I know, I know what it
draws. You know what I mean?
Yeah, I'm not my real name. I took so long ago.
I took my real name off of everything.
And like, it's funny people call me Lizard now because I think
some people don't even know what my real name is because I don't
have it anywhere. Yeah, and I think that's
honestly so important because women have to protect
themselves, especially now that we're starting to see that
literal stalkers are finding people from a reflection.
Yes. Phone or like the Starbucks
location that you posted, like you know there have been Tik
tokers that are like private investigators or whatever and
they're like, let me show you how easy it would be to find you
and they take your profile and they just randomly start
scrolling and they'll go OK here we'll start at the gym.
OK, so there's only 6 locations in the metropolitan area of this
gym. So you're at one of these six
locations. So now let's map your route.
OK, well let's narrow it down to two locations because they're
both on Dixie Highway and you hit the Scooter's coffee in the
middle of it. So you went to the right or the
left after that. OK, you hit this Kroger.
Well, now I've zeroed you into this box.
There were six and we were here and now you're here, and that's
the type of shit that makes me post things that confuse people.
No I literally those videos have like made me think about what I
post and when I post it too. I don't.
I used to post all the time, like like live I guess you would
say like I, I took this picture I posted.
No, I'm not posting that till the next day, maybe two days
later cuz I'm gonna forget about it.
And then I'm like, Oh yeah, that cute picture.
I'm gonna post it like I have never post things on the day I
met. You will not know where I'm at
on that day, I can promise you. Yeah, like, I will have taken a
whole fucking vacation and not told anyone or posted anything.
And then I'll come home and be like, do not disturb.
And I'm like, not there anymore. You all.
Like, I am back at the crib. Like, that's the thing, though,
with social media especially, we've just become so
desensitized to these things. We're like, well, who would be
watching that? I'm at the Target and then went
to Starbucks and then hit, you know, Panera Bread afterwards.
Like, who's watching? I don't fucking know who's
watching, but I don't care. That's why I have a loaded gun.
But if all else fails, I'm going to make it confusing for you.
Like you're not just going to be able to know where I'm at and
there's weirdos out there that will like watch every move you
make and never say a word. Yeah, I mean, I haven't happened
to me in real life. Like, I've had people literally
see me at the gas station and start following me.
I'm not giving you an easier chance to get me, I can tell you
that. Yeah, I think so many people
don't understand what women go through on a daily basis with
social media. They don't, they don't.
And then they'll be like, oh, but you oppose, so you must want
that. It's like, well, maybe I just, I
just like taking a picture and I thought I was cute and I wanted,
you know what I mean? Like Lord Jesus, like I, I feel
like people forget this social media thing.
Like we were all just posting pictures we thought were cute at
first. Like we weren't.
We were posting it for our friends and our family.
We weren't trying to get a bunch of followers or like likes or
interaction. We weren't trying to go viral.
Like it was like oh look at this cute little picture I took.
So real, the way we're using social media is going to change
in the next couple years because I've been watching a lot of
people talk about like getting rid of their iPhone and like
getting a razor or like, and I've talked about this like I
have two phones, work pays for one and I pay for one for my
business. And I'm literally thinking about
taking my phone that I use the most and getting like a flip
phone, like straight up because I'm still going to have an
iPhone. But I'm literally wanting to
remove the constant accessibility of social media
from my life. I actually went without a phone
like phone service at all for two years and it.
All that you used to carry your iPad everywhere, right?
But that was so funny. So funny.
Yeah, No, it was actually hilarious.
It was wonderful and kind of awful at the same time.
Like I enjoyed the disconnection.
I loved being hard to get a hold of.
I loved when I got into the car. Like it when I didn't have
Wi-Fi, I what you couldn't get a hold of me.
I couldn't get a hold of anybody else either.
So when I was in my car, like I was vibing like and not like I
didn't I wasn't worried about nothing like when I would go out
and have I like to go out by myself, take myself out to eat,
go to dinner and go to a movie, do that kind of stuff.
When I was doing that, it was completely by myself and I loved
it. But then like my car would break
down and I'd have to walk to who and who knows where who had
Wi-Fi so I could connect to the Wi-Fi so I could call someone to
come pick me up. Or like maybe my money didn't go
through and I couldn't check it because my Wi-Fi was, I didn't
have Wi-Fi. So it like it sucks that you
have to be connected somewhat still nowadays because that's
the way the world is designed. Yes, and I talk about this so
much about how, like the universe or the the world around
us has changed around the Internet rather than the
Internet changing around us. We took it from this very
stationary place that was like super fun and like we were
fighting over it in the home computer or whatever.
Yeah, it's like constant like, no, I don't want to fill out my
fucking dentist forms on this computer right now or on this
iPad. Like, I just want to sign in and
see the dentist. Like I don't want to fill this
out. And like even just like with
like cosmetic procedures or just different things, like you got
to sign forms before you even walk into the place.
Like I don't like it. And the other thing about like
the digital footprint, I really wonder if there was like some
hard reset because like my, my space does not exist.
Half the shit I've been on the Internet.
My God. And I used to be able to find
it, yeah, looking at it all the time, and it would crack me up
because that was a different person.
But it was like I could see it for years.
I couldn't get into it. I didn't have like any way to
get in, but I could like look up my name and find it and then all
of a sudden I couldn't find it anymore.
Yeah, see, that's what I'm saying.
I feel like they did some kind of hard reset on like most of
the Internet and now they're like counting.
Like now it's counting. And I, you know, there was this
guy, I learned a lot on TikTok. There was a man that basically
looks like you and me, covered in tattoos, super millennial,
and he's hired by massive corporations to reverse search
their applicants. Like that's his job.
He literally like said that what stops people from getting the
job 99% of the time is not the photos they posted.
It's the random opinions and comments that they post on like
CNN or WLKY or, you know, like screaming racist things,
political slurs, you know, whatever it may be.
Even just like men constantly harassing women.
They were talking about that like someone had applied for
this job. They had just got out of
college. They were like top in their
class. They went to a really
prestigious school and they were now blacklisted from like 500
Fortune 500 companies type thing because this network like
whatever, whoever he works for expands the web and kind of like
ropes in the big corporations. So basically you, you get
blacklisted and it'll say why. And it's like she called this
lady a fat racist slur. You know what I mean?
Or like she said, these children should starve and die because
they are racial slur or whatever.
You know, like this really fucked up shit that you don't
think anybody's going to see. You don't think that anyone saw
you comment in the bag Lady got my food stamps for sale or
whatever. Like you didn't think no one saw
that shit. But this man, like he's like,
even if you delete it, he can still find it.
Yeah, I think people forget that everyone's like, oh, the
Internet's not real. That's not real.
Like, yes, you can be fake on the Internet, but Internet is
real. Like you post this stuff, it
does not go away. And also that you just, you
shouldn't be saying stuff that you wouldn't say in real life
anyways. Like if you're not that bold in
real life, don't be that bold online.
That's crazy. That's really the problem.
Is like the men that approach me online would never speak to me
in person, like never once in their life.
And then the men that I would like to approach me don't say
shit at all. Like I'm like, why did this
person feel like this was a good idea?
And this person who actually has a shot won't say anything.
Like they won't say nothing. Like, it's a really weird place
because it gives people a false sense of entitlement, all sense
of confidence. And then also people who really
are good people are like, scared to put themselves out there too.
Like, you know, I don't know what's going on with social
media, but I did see that there's like, you know, like
when you're in high school, they'll do like a poll that'll
say, like, what do people want to be when they grow up?
And like we used to say things like a nurse or a doctor or, you
know, I want to be a musician or whatever or whatever.
OK, cool. Well now on the pie chart, it's
like 50 to 60% want to do something that's Internet based,
like content creation or, you know, they want to make beats,
they want to be a streamer, you know, whatever it is.
And I'm not saying making beats isn't a career, but we do not
need 60% of the next generation only wanting to do online based
jobs. Not everybody gets to do that.
No, like, no, like, like, I don't know.
I saw and it was like we need more electricians and like
plumbers and stuff like. Jobs, yes.
Those jobs are literally what we need.
And that's the reason those prices are going up.
And like service type jobs are going up because AI is never
going to be able to unclog your pipes, but it can replace you in
other areas like data entry jobs or whatever.
But at the end of the day, like AI is not going to replace
artists. Artists need to evolve alongside
AI. So what's your opinion on like
AI art? I so AI art I see is a form of
copying like cuz that's you're not creating that.
Like you're caught, you're copying something like you have
to put in like something that's already created into it so it
can like morph it into something.
However, I do love using AI as a tool.
I do get like the guilt of the environment, like what it's
doing to the environment. Also, like I'm one person in
this world. Like everybody's doing it like
it's like, so it's like that kind of like that environmental
guilt gets me. But it is such a good tool for
finding like references and things of that nature.
I think that if there's a way we can like find a way for it not
to be so detrimental to the environment, it could be an
amazing tool. You know, speaking on that, I
also went into a deep dark depression about the environment
and how it was affecting the environment.
And I know that it's a tool that's like inherently going to
kind of mold and shape what you want to hear.
But it was like, it was like, OK, so then you should also cut
off Instagram and TikTok and all of these other platforms.
They all like cooling towers and cooling capacity that's using
water constantly. He said OK, so like you sat here
and you watch 10 Reels, it's the same thing.
Same. Thing those cooling towers, like
you know, they're building that huge data center over in Indiana
and it is fucking massive. You all if you all knew how much
farmland it's taking to build that new meta data center, you'd
be disgusted with yourself or even supporting their platform.
But with that being said, like that's what's going to be housed
there is like those cooling towers and capabilities.
So do you all think that ChatGPT or other AI platforms are any
different than meta integrating AI into fucking everything when
you post a picture? We didn't even ask AI for their
opinion but now there's like 5 little AI opinions at the
bottom. Or Google you.
You can't Google nothing without the AI thing popping up or what
you know. And it's like you're you using
it. Everybody's using it.
And I have, that's something I really struggle with.
Another one, like my one of my like side jobs that I do is
Amazon Flex. And it like I make good money
doing it. But like I'm like, Oh my God,
like I'm delivering all this stuff this like, like I'm, it's
just like not a bunch of trash, but like it's a bunch of stuff
that's gonna be trash one day. Like it's like killing our
planet, but here I am serving it on a platter.
Like it's it's like hard to be stuck in this world but also
have to function and be a part of it.
Yeah, Spirit. Like I went into like this
really deep, like plant medicine journey and I had not done
mushrooms in a long time. And I went into this deep
journey and during it I got really sad.
Like I get really heavy. I always cry, but I was like
really heavy and like weighed down by the state of the world.
And Mother Earth was like, look, this is the plastic planet.
They tell you that this is the only planet like yours, but it's
not. And they were, she was like, and
I'll flip this whole motherfucker over.
She was like, do you hear me when I tell you I will flip this
whole motherfucker over there. She was so serious with me and
I'm just like crying and I'm just like upset and like I'm
just feeling some type of way. And she's like, I will show you
if I don't say that three days later we had like several
tornadoes in Kentucky and then a fucking flood like all in the
same like month that she told me she will flip this fucker over.
I have tried to just completely keep my vibration high because
there are so many things that we support every day unknowingly
that are destroying the planet way more than AI.
Or like I told someone else, like you all weren't worried
about the kids in the Congo when they were picking mercury and
lithium for your cell phone, but it was fine then, you know, like
there's so many elements. But she was basically like
telling me that this is the plastic planet.
And then it was always designed to go in this direction.
Like it was always designed for humans to like be their own
demise. Like, it was always designed
like that. And she was like, and I'm in
control and you're here to raise the vibration of this place.
She was like, I don't need you lowering your vibration because
you're throwing away a water bottle or whatever.
She's like, don't be over consumerist.
Like don't be a hyper consumerist.
Don't feel like you need to upgrade your phone or upgrade
every little thing. Like, and what she was saying
was like so fucking real. And then boom tornadoes, boom
flood. And people are like fighting for
their life. And it really just made me
realize that, like, natural disasters occur so nature can
heal, because that is only when people realize that it's just
fucking stuff. Yeah, yeah, No, going back to
what you said about like the how it was like kind of designed to
go this way. So funny you say that because
literally today, like I'm driving, I'm delivering and you
know, you on the road for hours. So I just like look around and
like something I truly, truly hate our roads themselves.
I think the way we designed them was so dumb to put this into our
earth and our ground. Like and I was thinking and one
day like what we have all these bridges, all these ramps, like
we literally couldn't just build roads up and have earth
underneath of it. Like why did we have to put it
into our earth? And it's already there now.
Like there's nothing we can do about it.
Like we've already taken so much grass space, so much like like
it's so dangerous for animals, like and that kind of stuff.
Like it's so and it is what it is now.
What are we going to do? Yeah, they're like widening the
highway going toward Lexington and like down South.
And it's honestly the only positive that I could see from
it is that there used to be kind of a mini forest in the middle
separating the roads, which was bad for the animals because if
there's forest in the middle of a major roads, they're trying to
make it to the middle. So the only positive I could see
is that removing that middle is going to tell the animals it's
this side or that side, buddy. And you're not going to make it
across 8 lanes right now. You need to, but I get so worked
up over roadkill and like there's this quote from this
poet that basically talks about in order for so many things to
live, so many things must die. And that's like the one thing
that keeps me like focused and going because I get so bent out
of shape over roadkill. You would think it was my
fucking pet out there. My mentor, she told me that when
you see an animal on the side of the road, just ask nature
spirits to like let their family know and to like deliver their
spirit safely. I started doing that and it's
really made me feel better because I saw a baby fox and it
really broke my heart. And I was like, the foxes are
healing, They're thriving. I was like, everyone is safe.
And like, I was just like, so like just feeling some type of
way. But I do believe and like I do
consent to the idea that like one person who's living in
alignment and keeping their vibration high really does
counterbalance like 607 hundred thousand other people who are
not because we get so caught up in like low energy or high
energy. But if you don't realize, like
high energy can be excitement and it could be anger, low
energy can be peace and it could be sadness.
Like low or high is not the spectrum.
It's the amplification of whatever vibration you're
sending out. And I'm constantly trying to
send out like the world is healing or we're all at peace.
And so when Mother Earth was like, I am only going to tell
you this once, like I will flip this whole fucker over.
They were like, she was like the White House.
I'll split it open in the middle, put it down in the hole.
Like she was like, sinkholes are my best friends.
She was like, I'll open one. She was like, just stay focused.
Like just keep your head up or whatever.
And I swear to you, like within the next three weeks, the whole
world was just like in jingles and like no regret.
And you know, it made me realize that we are here to break free
of the matrix around material and with natural disasters, as
when people realize this is just fucking stuff.
It's like as a kid, I survived the tornado.
So I'm already like, I've paid my dues, Like I survived the
tornado. I lived in a trailer.
I am good. Like you don't get to do that to
me again. Like I'm out.
I'm out on that. But you know, that tornado that
hit recently hit really close to a couple people I know, like,
yeah, miles away. It's crazy.
I do believe that, like the that's spiritually, I think
that's what I believe in the most is the earth itself.
Like that, that is our God, that like this is literally what we
live on. Like this is what we should be
focusing on. Yes, I honestly think that like
we as a collective have been divided because we have to see
both ends of the coin. Like we have to see what hyper
consumerism and capitalism and those things, what they're
doing. And what's crazy is like, even
like, you know, 50 years ago, people made a lot at home.
They homesteaded, they grew their own food.
Like it only took two generations to completely rob US
of like survival skills. And I'm just, I'm just flat out
like if there is some kind of crazy thing, I'm good.
I'm going to be with God. I'm going to be with the God.
Me out. I.
I like literally first of all, like I'd get my nails done.
Like what do you want me to not do my nails anymore?
You want me to let these grow out and then I'm pop a nail and
I'm going to and then I'm gonna have a broken nail in what, like
this awful state? Like no, Take Me Out.
Yeah, like, I just like when you see movies of like, people like
trying to survive. I'm just like, I ain't me.
Like I saw this thing and it was talking about how to survive a
nuclear explosion. I saw that.
I saw good. Like I've read it.
And like by step three, I'm like, bro, first of all, you got
30 seconds to do all this. My favorite part is when they
said that you should bag up your chimneys and all the vents to
your home. Yeah, while while you're staying
away from all the windows, like, what do you want from me?
It sounds like you have to prepare your shit.
And The thing is, is if you seal up every like crevice of your
home, you're literally going to have CO2 in your home.
Like, you're literally going to flood your house with CO2 now.
I don't know, Like the Internet, obviously, I see a lot of that
stuff. And, you know, they're doing it
for views. Yeah.
For attention. Like none of what they're saying
is even like plausible, honestly believe that like in that type
of scenario, only the people who have been preparing like
underground bunkers, rich people, whatever.
Like they're going to be OK. But like, I just feel at this
point I did not come here to suffer.
So the moment that suffering becomes the prominence of my
experience, nothing. I'm I'm going back like.
Enough of it. Yeah, like I've already suffered
enough. Like choosing to come here
during this timeline as a woman. We've already suffered like we
we've done it you. Got it.
Yes, it's like they still are trying to like make women
suffer. Like truly.
And I love watching rebellious women like yourself.
They're like, no, fuck that. Like that's kind of how I see
you. And like, I see that reflection
of like, other women who are just like, yeah, fuck the system
even, like you said, like even just to be able to take a year
off work and survive off of only fans or your own art or your own
passion, that's a fucking win. Like, so people, they're afraid
of that. What do you say is like the
hardest thing for you right now to transition into this next
chapter with like tattooing? Honestly, finding a space to
tattoo in. So me and my mentor, we were
working in a shop together, like I said, and then my boss decided
not to. We got a spot and then, you
know, it really just didn't work out.
And we're kind of like Louisville has such hard like
restrictions for like tattooing space, Like there has to be a
certain type of plumbing. And then that means you have to
have and you have to have a master plumber come in and do
it. You can't just have a plumber
come and do it. You have to have someone who you
know, is a master plumber. So it's going to cost an arm and
a leg to get it done and that and it has to have all these
restrictions. So we finally got up, space up
and then that didn't work out. We're like, well, maybe we could
go to Indiana where they, you know, you can have sinks, but
they don't have to be done by a master plumber and everything.
But now we've decided we're going to do a mobile studio.
So that's really cool. It's just recently, I guess,
become legal in Kentucky and we're gonna get an RV and
renovate it and like drive around and be tattooing.
And so that's really exciting. So it's just kind of like
building up the funds for the renovation on that and doing all
that. And it's like you kind of got to
play the corporate game to get to a point where you don't have
to play that game. Yes, I like I went to college
and I did business and marketing with communications and I have a
bachelor's in it and it has helped me so fucking much with
my business and my social like presence because I do everything
the legal way. Like I do everything the right
way. Yeah, like I'm not playing any
games. Like you will go to jail.
Like they will you to jail over over tax evasion.
Or and be I'd be damned if I can't tattoo no more because I
didn't pay a master plumber. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They really do, like make it so hard for small business owners.
And that's what I think that is something that's going to shift
in this next reality because so many people are tired of working
a job they hate, buying shit they don't need.
That does not make them happy. And I'm seeing such a shift in
people like, yeah, I don't need that.
No, I'm not doing that. Yeah, no, for real.
We were just me and my friends are talking about like, we're
what happened to house parties. Why aren't we doing house
parties anymore? Like I'm tired of like paying
$20 to get into this place just to stand around and stare at
people like, you know what I mean?
Like, I think I do also kind of feel that shift where people are
wanting to like not consume as much anymore.
Yeah, like I have been on like the don't buy anything.
So what I've been doing is like, I'll go to the website, I run up
a cart for my e-mail and stuff and then they'll start sending
me coupons. And then if I'm still thinking
about it like weeks later. So I started out, I found this
Dooney and Bourke purse I really wanted.
I've known a Dooney and Bourke since I was like 12.
But if my inner child really wanted it, I was just feeling
it. I was like, I need this.
It's rainbow, it's art deco. It's really pretty.
So I see it. It's $400.00.
I'm like, fuck, no. So weeks, months go back, I get
an ad. And I didn't realize, but Dooney
and Bourke has like their main website, kind of like coaches,
but they also have an online outlet website.
I'd be named if that purse isn't 70% off.
Isn't that crazy? On that website, so just adding
it to cart and interacting with it.
They then sent me the the cheap site.
So we're talking like a 400 and something dollar bag and they
got it on here for like 140. But if I signed up for their
emails they would give me an additional 25% off and free
shipping. See, that makes me mad because
that just tells me that that's what it could cost.
There you go. And I end up getting it for like
121 out the door. And I just like, changed over to
it today and it's red on the inside.
It's leather. And they have a warranty for one
year, which no purses do that anymore.
And it's like all leather and it's so perfect.
And so I'm like that the long game of like, not just
impulsively buying does pay off. Like people in previous
generations used to have to save their money.
It wasn't all like Klarna and Afterpay, you know.
No, I can't get involved in that.
I can't do credit cards or none of that.
I when I was in my 20s, I wrecked myself.
Let me tell you, I'm still building back up from that.
Well, if you ever need a credit lesson, I'm like so good at
credit. Like my score is like 830 and
every month it'll either go down 4 points or go up two or three.
So like this month I made a huge payment on my condo because I'm
trying to pay it off and it went down 4 points.
And so I texted my dad and he goes, he said don't worry about
it. He said debt is slavery and they
want you enslaved. And I'm like, I don't know.
I was like, I know. It was no, it was way too easy
for me to get a credit card when I was younger.
It was way too easy. I had like 7 of them and I did
not understand. I did not.
I did. I do have a lot of credit cards,
but I've always been really mindful of them.
But whenever I first got my first card, it was a Victoria's
Secret credit card. I would be in there.
They are the OGI at least will spend a couple $100 there a year
just so they don't close my account because it's my oldest
credit account which matters. So I like this month I spent $13
and I got a text and it was like a dormant account has been
active and I hope on it and it was Victoria's Secret but like
they had no business in giving me an $8000.
No, no, I think the first rented car I ever got was a $5000 limit
and I was barely 20. What in the world?
But The thing is, is like they keep you enslaved with that
instead of focusing your 20s on saving money, paying off a car
and maybe getting a house to pay, Yeah, interest rate.
And you're still trying to build back from it.
Yeah. Basically a whole nother bill
for every month. Just.
Harder. Yeah, I'm like really good at
credit, but I'm very much on like you got to pay it off.
Like you can't just spend like we got to pay it and like.
Have to. You literally have to.
Like paying it off every month is the requirement because I am
not paying interest like baby, I will not pay any fees or any
interest. But the thing for me is I got
the credit card that gets flight points through Southwest.
That's where it's at because I spend money on there, but then I
get free flights, so it's like it's a win.
Yeah, you get your money back out of that.
I get my money back, plus I don't pay any fees at all like I
have it. Like like I said, my credit is
so good that I get penalized for paying things off.
I get penalized. I think that is so stupid.
Yes I think that it's such a scam because like how do you
make a mass payment towards a big loan and you take my shit
down 4 points. No, literally like I did
something good and you're they're.
Like they're like, no, fuck her, she's doing good.
And like actually now people don't realize, but you'll get a
better loan with like a 600 to 700 credit score.
Because when you get over 750 and you go into the 800's, they
know I'm going to pay that loan. They know they're not going to
get any interest out of me, so they don't want to give it to
me. Yeah.
They're like all right miss thing you thought you were
popping your shit, pay cash for it then no.
But then you you're like, oh, I only make 30,000 a year and my
credit score is 6612 for like give her 7500.
Yeah. Give her 12.
We're like, Are you sure you don't want more?
Because we'll give it to you. We will.
That's how they keep people enslaved, whether it's like
student loans or credit cards. There is no reason that you're
giving those to 18 year olds. No, it's so crazy.
It it really does set people up for failure.
And that's my one like preaching moment is whenever I got out of
college, I had $70,000 in student loans and my payment,
what they said I had to pay was like 80 bucks a month.
If I would have been paying 80 bucks a month for the last 15-10
fifteen years, I would still have more debt than I took out.
Yeah. So what I did is I stayed living
at my grandma's for like a year, rented this ghetto little house
that didn't even have air. It got broken into as soon as I
moved in, like just ghetto because I was trying to like pay
that off. And I was able to do that.
But it's like it wasn't easy. And when people are like, I make
my payments, that's not enough. I mean, they give you the lowest
amount so that you pay the most an interest.
Did you like go to art school or do anything like how did you get
into your art? I honestly.
I was going to go to the Art Institute of Cincinnati for
college. And then like, my family kind of
convinced me to, they didn't want me to leave.
They want me to stay close. So they convinced me to stay
home. So I never ever got into it
professionally. I you know, but I've always been
in the service industry and doing that.
I've never thought of art as a career until I started getting
into tattooing. Like I said, that's something
that kind of drawed me. I thought about doing graphic
design, but I don't love the corporate end of corporateness
of it. I like, I like to draw titties
and ass, you know what I mean? Like it's like super like dark,
Moody adult themes like I and that's not really, it's hard to
make a living doing something like that unless like you find
like people that like your niche or like Patreon or something
like that. You can't get like a real job
doing that. Until I got into tattooing and
I'm like, oh, I can draw what I want on the side and then people
are probably going to get that tattooed on them.
And then also I get to collaborate with somebody else
and design something for them. So I got two things I need you
to draw me some stickers. I will pay you.
I need I got you sticker designs.
Another thing is I saw this girl who's like an A big artist like
TikTok viral type artist and I went to her website, right?
And I'm looking at her art. This woman is delusional.
For one, not about her prices. She had this thing and it was
called a a tattoo release price. Yeah, what?
The fuck's this? She literally expects people who
want to get her art tattooed to pay her like 20 or $30 to
release the the image. Girl you already put the image
out there. I'm not trying to steal your
work. I'm not being a hater on your on
your your skills. But baby girl you already put it
out there if you didn't watermark it or make it like you
know what I mean? How are you?
What's your opinion on that? Is that normal?
I mean, I've seen a lot of artists doing it.
I personally like it's, it's kind of like, would I like to
get paid for people using by design?
Sure. Do I think me putting it out
there, I'm going, I'm going to get that every time.
No, like that's not how that works.
This is literally one. It's the Internet.
You don't know where this has come from.
You don't know. It's so hard to find the
original artist sometimes. Like you can't like, you know,
all this stuff, It's like if you are going to screenshot and get
somebody's work tattooed on you, you already know you're going to
do that. Like, you know, if it's kind of
like if you wanted to get something original, you would go
to an artist and do that. So it's kind of like a catch to
like, I get where the artist is coming from, but you can't
expect that to happen every time.
Like people are just, they're going to steal your shit.
People have been stealing art since art.
Yeah, and that's like with Pinterest, you know, like when
you look things up on Pinterest, it just pops things up, you
know? And the thing I love about my
artist is he's always like, I'll reference this photo, but I'm
going to draw you a new one. Like even if it's a spider web
or something really basic, he still drew it specifically for
my body. That's the sign of a good
artist. Like if they are like, if if you
bring in a piece of paper and you're like, hey, I want exactly
this and I have where I bought it from the artist, the tattoo
art that like that kind of in the tattoo artist's eyes,
they're not going to have any. They're going to be like, cool,
let's do it. But if you bring something to
somebody and the tattoo artist isn't like, Hey, can I change
this up a little bit? Can we like, you know, make it
yours? If they're not doing that,
they're not a good artist. They're they're just going to
slap somebody else's stuff on you and then it's probably not
going to look great. It's not going to be for your
body that kind of like you said, you got to draw it to people's.
Yeah, and that's like why I feel so grateful that I do have
Quentin to do my tattoos because I can trust him.
I've came to him with ideas and he's like, won't heal well,
don't look good. Like I end up getting this huge
butterfly on my hand because I wanted a really small one on my
thumb and he was like, absolutely not.
That will heal like shit. He was like, he wanted to look
good. Or do you want just this little
Pinterest thing, you know, or whatever?
Like that's what I love about him and when I send people to
him, he's never just going to take your money.
Like even when it comes to like tattooing names, he has a policy
that like, he won't do it unless you wait a month after your
first request. Like if you come back in a month
and you are dead set, he's like, I'll do it.
He's like same thing with people's faces.
But he did say that he stopped turning people away the more
mainstream face tattoos have gotten.
Yeah, he. Grew up in like, you know, the
tattoo Charlie era. No hands, no neck, no face.
Yeah, he takes that serious. Like he, he's always taking that
pretty serious. And he's pretty much, I think
there's like some kind of checklist.
It's like, do you have your chest?
No, no face tattoo. Do you have two sleeves?
No, no, no face tattoo or whatever.
Like he's got a checklist. But he did say that he started
taking on those requests because he realized that those people
were just going to go and get it somewhere else.
Shitty on her face. Me and my mentor have talked
about too because she feels the same way.
Like she she's going to tell you she doesn't want to do it and
she's going to tell you why. However, if you are super
adamant that you want it, she is going to go ahead and do it
because she is does phenomenal fine line tattoos and a lot of
face tattoos need to be fine line and a lot of people cannot
do fine line tattoos. That's one of the you can do.
So she and that's kind of like it's like, are you going to take
this client and do something that maybe they'll regret?
Yeah. But it's also not going to be as
bad as it is if they go to somebody that's just going to do
it, not even question it, they're like, yeah, sit down,
let's blast this out. Yeah, and you know, I really do
feel like people get shit without thinking it through
because I didn't start getting tattoos till Kovid hit is when I
started really getting my leg sleeves and really getting
tattooed. But I had little tattoos
previously and I've covered most of them up.
Like you know what I mean? Like when you get shit when
you're like 18/19/20, you're just probably not going to like
it when you're 35. Like you're just not.
It's just how you're you know, like if I could have gotten
tattooed at 18, I would have had nautical fucking stars, probably
a sun around my belly button. Fucking we always make a joke
about like the the Browning, like deer symbol of like the God
deer and the girl deer. I'm like, probably would have
had one of those like shit that should have just been a bumper
sticker would have been on my body.
No, I'm actually pretty lucky that I don't have stuff like
that. I feel like that might have to
lean into me always kind of being an artist.
I've always kind of every tattoo I did ask, I'm not going to lie,
I started getting tattoos when I was 17.
I went to some guy's house and got a little Infinity tattoo and
that's the only one where I'm like, yeah, yeah, I could.
I could have not done that one. I still have it though, because
I got it for my grandma, so I'm not going to cover it up.
But all my other ones, I just kind of wanted something that
was more for me, so I would take an inspiration and then draw it
myself. So I kind of, I already had my
work on me so I haven't covered everything, but I do kind of
regret getting color tattoos because it hurts to sit for
these motherfuckers. Yeah, I know that you have like
a lot of like hippie ish tattoos.
Like tie dye is one of my favorite things.
Don't you have a lava lamp too? Yeah, I have a lava lamp.
I'm actually working on another app.
My whole my whole side is tie dye and I just said that
actually is a cover up, but that's it was like an unfinished
tattoo. So I was like, fuck it, cover
with color. So we cover that up with color.
And then my second cover up that I'm working on now I'm doing on
myself and it's on my knee and I didn't know.
I don't love the Rose on my knee.
I don't love the artist that did it.
So I was like, I don't know what I want on my knee.
I already have this giant red rose.
Like I can't like if I could go back I would probably get
something that like wrapped around my knee instead of
covering it whole because damn that hurts but I'm tattooing a
tie dye over it myself. I would imagine that tattooing
yourself is its own kind of spicy because your brain has to
work. Like when I'm getting tattooed,
I can just turn off my brain and breathe and like focus on the
wall or the art. But like, when you're doing it
yourself, I can only imagine that that takes a level of
patience that a lot of people don't have.
It yeah, it takes me well, especially because I'm just
starting out and I haven't been tattooing for too long.
I'm slow. Like bottom line, I am so slow
and I cannot get a lot done in a lot of time.
So it's like I'm tattooing on my knee for an hour and a half and
I have like one line on me. So it's like it's kind of
frustrating that way pain wise. Maybe the tattoo artist that did
it was a lot heavier handed than me.
I'm taking it easier this time with me doing it.
People have tattooed. They've all said I'm very light
handed. I'm like kind of just bounce.
I'm have the problem where I don't like get the ink in all
the way sometimes. Like I'm not going deep enough.
So I'm like super light handed. Yeah, you're like, I'm barely
even touched. I'm barely like I'm like I've
gotten to the point now where I can get it solid, but when I
first started doing it, like I like my poor cousin, his tattoo
would heal and the ink wasn't in and I'm like, sorry, we don't
have to go back into. That like, yeah, by the way,
we're gonna have to go back in. We're going back into that.
Well, fix it look good, but it's going to take several times.
I love this so much. This has been such a great
interview. I'm really grateful that you
chose to come on and talk with us today.
If you had a message to leave everyone with, what would it be?
A message to leave everyone with.
You know, just keep doing what you're doing.
We're doing the best we can out here.
We all are, you know, try to keep a happy outlook on
everything and just keep doing the damn thing.
Throwing up. That's all you can do you.
Can do like I've had a couple of hard days this past week myself,
but you know, I'm getting back into it.
I've actually got my iPad right behind me.
I'm going to draw after I get off here.
So kind of get get into the doing what you need to do.
Oh yeah? Well, thank you so much, Lizard
Queen. Thank.
You thank you for inviting me. We can.
We'll have all of her stuff at the bottom in the bio of the
description so you can follow her on social media, buy some of
her artwork and tap in with her and see if she's going to post
any more of those thirst traps for you all.
And we will see you next time in Candyland.
Bye bye. Welcome to Candyland, spicy and
sweet. You're in for a tree.
You're wildest trees. Got gun drops of knowledge and
liquorice too Plump. Fancy picking for me and you,
Candyland. Candyland a mystery Coldplay.
Here your shadows will meet your life face to face.
Let your imagination run wild as stories unfold.
May you really anything that has a whole.
Welcome to Candyland. Spicy and sweet, you're in for a
tree. You're wildest streams, gumtrops
of knowledge and liquorice too. Plums plenty picking for me and
you. Thank you for joining us.
May you find solace and grace. Welcome to Candyland.