Welcome to fucking Dandy land hosted by Rampage and Gemini.
Welcome back to Candyland. How are you?
Feeling Gemini. I'm good.
I feel super like motivated and inspired after our last episode.
We got so much feedback and I got a lot of like oh you guys
were super inflow. I can't wait for season 3 and to
see how you guys are season 3. Honestly, I feel like since we
met last time, I am on a let go of everything.
Purge everything release. It's everything I find that I
can be organized for a little bit and then it just all starts
piling up. So like periodically, every like
three to four months. I have to just literally pull
everything out and make it organized again because it
becomes a mess. Well like I'm in the middle of
that same theme right now with moving and everything having to
like be dug out from wherever it's at and figure out like if
I'm attached to it or not. And I've kind of Been putting
off doing that in the podcast room and this is the space that
like I just I don't know. I feel like I want to cleanse
everything and like release from this space before I take it all
into a new space and so I haven't come in here and done it
yet because I have this like perfect thing in my mind of like
have music going and like incense and like having a whole
like spiritual thing about it. Honestly, I feel like I'm on my
home ownership as well and there's That saying like just
Dynamic and I don't know if it's just like the warmer weather but
I've been like repotting plants. I've really been expanding and
I'm just got on this wave that like even if I like it but I
don't use it. I don't want it because there's
so many times that you'll have something you're like, no, I'll
save that. I'll fit into it one day or for
me now because I'm building muscle, I'm growing out of my
shirts like they fit but I could just like Snap them And like
we're getting them. So I'm finding that there's so
many cute like Cardigans and Sweaters and things that I have
that are just extremely tight in the arms.
And it's like yeah could hold on to this and then maybe one day
I'll be out of shape but it's like I don't, I don't want to be
out of shape again. I've been doing that with close
to, and it's funny that we're talking about clothes because
there was definitely a couple items where I was like, what
would page say if she saw me in this and I'm like, she would
tell me that's not cute. And so then I and so then I got
rid of it, it's not cute. Well I've decided because
basically I have a lot of stuff that just kind of sets and it's
space like throughout the year and then I'll give it away to
someone and they're like oh my God I really love that jacket.
You gave I really love this and I find that I find just as much
joy from like keeping it and wearing it myself as then when I
see someone like Snapchat me and they're wearing something I gave
to them then I'm like oh my gosh that's so cool because I love
clothes but I also don't like wearing the same thing a bunch
of times so I like won't wear it for like three years and it'll
just said so it's like I don't know you gave me is that like
Cardigan sweater thing when we were in Utah.
And that thing is so fucking warm, but you would, you'd be
like, okay? So like what are you wearing
tomorrow when we go to the airport, okay.
Well like you should wear that jacket that I gave you because
that would be cute with it and was like, okay, what if I've
I've literally been shopping for you and I don't know why.
I like every time I see something like, oh my God,
that's on still wonder if Jim and I like that and I just been
buying you all kinds of clothes and stuff that you're probably
going to be like, what the fuck is this bitch doing?
Like you're gonna get I told you it probably.
A pocket, personal stylist Edition, crop tops.
What is she on? Like what else is she sending
me? I love it.
I'm here for it. I don't know, I'm just got on
this wave that when I let go of stuff, I just create this
energetic contract with the universe that I just don't give
a fuck about material items and then they send me more and then
they're like, well, what about these sunglasses or what about
this? Or someone's like, hey, I want
to give you this Crystal, you know, it's like the more that
you let go and you send that message to the universe.
A, you're not attached. The more easy things will come
into your life. Yeah, and I think that comes to
with having an appreciation for things in life outside of having
material things. And a lot of people I think
don't have that. There's some people or there's a
song that my husband. Listen to that says, you're so
broke because all you have is money and that always just
sticks out into my mind. Because it for me, the people
who always seem like they have the most to me are the people
who are genuinely We enjoying their life and not worrying
about being able to collect up. Like we've talked about it
before like people that are just so focused on money.
Their souls are always just gross and you're like, okay
cool, you have a Shoe Closet, but no deaths.
And when people set their happiness scale, like at how
much material they've acquired or how much money they make, or
what kind of car, they drive you really lose the essence of, what
your soul came here to do. Because there is so many
distractions and allusions in the things that we seek here and
I love that saying like, you can't take it with you, and I've
really started to live by that, because so many people stay in
like their Hometown or stay in a familiar place because they have
so much stuff that the thought of moving it or relocating that
stuff really is, the reason they never leave.
It's the reason that when they move they, they Bounce from
apartment. To apartment or whatever, but
they never actually get away from where they grew up.
And I believe it's the stuff that holds people there because
it's easy to say, I don't know how I'm going to move all that
rather than just letting it all go and going where you're called
to go. I also think too that people can
have trauma bonds to locations and spaces.
Like, I think that I had a trauma bond to my hometown for a
while because everywhere that I would go, I had memories of
different places or Different people.
And so there was a lot of familiarity and going out and
adventuring new things meeting new people.
Realizing that like there are so many different kinds of
connections, kind of breaks that Bond, I think.
And a lot of people who haven't gone out and search for things
that make their soul happy outside of their familiarity, I
think they don't even realize that they are those Hometown
people or think about the reason why they don't want to leave or
yeah. Items stuff.
I don't want to have to move it across, you know, state lines or
whatever it may be. Oh, always be honest.
Whenever I grew up, we grew up in a very material like
household. It was always, like look what I
bought for you or I bought this for you and it was very much to
justifiable of and I think that in my adult life I took like,
what people could give me or provide to me as love.
And I think that the one thing that really helped during my
Spiritual Awakening as I realized That you can have
everything and be miserable. Like you said earlier, the
people who have the most normally are the most depressed
or sad people, but I also just created a new Dynamic with
energy. I like to give presents because
I know my energy lives within that present, but the way that
I'm able to give that freely as I'm not attached, I'm not giving
this to you so I can receive something later.
You know, I know a lot of people do Don't know how to receive.
So when you're trying to give them something or offer,
something they are blocking the blessing.
That's coming through you as a person and that's what people
don't get. Like answered prayers, come
through strangers, and people that you've never met and
blessings that you don't see coming.
And I've learned that being attached to a certain timeline,
really, just weighs down your spirit, like, when I create
something and I make it for myself, it really comes
together. Beautifully.
But there's like money involved or someone wants a certain thing
a certain way. My brain will not be able to
create it like especially with art it's like someone could pay
me and give me space to create what I want to create or they
could pick a few colors and I'll use those colors, but beyond
that, you start giving me too much Direction.
And I'm like, nope, I'm good. Well, that's like, you know,
when you're talking about creativity to you as an artist
or whatnot, you're going to see things in your mind's eye.
That makes sense for you. And you know what, like your
artwork is, but somebody else. I feel like a lot of times
people can't fully communicate what it is that they're wanting.
And so it's really hard to have like collaborations on things
and that goes back into like just the way that we are able to
navigate. Gate.
What we do with different strengths and different like
expectations and having timelines on things but also
something that you've taught me. A lot is having the timeline on
things but being okay, if something happens and I'm I'm
not hard on myself anymore about that and you helped me a lot
with that of like, you're just trying to control timing that
doesn't make sense. Yeah.
And when we try to control the outcome, we're not open to what
spirit is showing us. We're letting our Go drive us
like oh this certain amount of money is going to make me happy.
That's going to make everything better in my relationships.
But the thing about money is, if you're always chasing it, it's
always running from you. So when you stop chasing it and
you realize that you're not just here to work and make money that
you're here to live your life to its fullest capacity.
Then the reality shifts and I think for us we found Avenues to
we're living our fullest capacity.
And and sharing things that like, we're passionate about an
interest us that has turned into having monetary gain, but we've
done what we've been doing before.
There was a monetary value to it.
We put a lot of money into what we do for our spirit whatever
and I feel like it ends up just being a rotation instead of an
expectancy. I mean I literally just stopped
like Drop $300 on cards and card debt.
So, I mean, I'm always investing into my craft, because I like to
have a variety of I'm going to read for someone monthly or all
the time. I am always trying to add new
card decks. But then I also give decks away
as well. And I mean, some people might
buy like, a thirty dollar DEC, 10 times, and I would rather
just get ten decks at once. So, I mean like, $300 to someone
might seem like a lot, but if you spend $30 to in times, like
it's the same thing. So in instead of all the little
positive reinforcement side, just like the one big like yes,
we got it all today but I actually there's an artist
that's creating their own spring Tarot deck and they have this
commission where you basically get to pay.
Like I don't know about 40% of what it will cost once it's in
print but you give it to them in advance so that they can sustain
their artwork and sustain their Their commissions from their
artists and things that are helping build the Tarot deck.
So with that, I get play-by-play updates on all the cards and
they're like, what they look like and how they've completed
them. And it's going to be like
glitter and its really, really like bright and colorful and it
was really cool because this deck is going to be like $90 and
I'm paying 35 a day. So I went ahead and ordered
everyone them because I just learned about my friend.
Ryan was just telling me that an artist, does this?
It's like a fundraising website. Basically.
And so you go in and you put a certain amount in for a start
with however, many decks you would want or whatever.
And if that artist doesn't meet their quota, then nobody has to
pay. And if they meet the quota, then
you have basically paid for them to be able to distribute this
deck out. And I've heard you and somebody
else tell me like within the last week and I just think that
that's like just really fucking cool.
All the different sites, really make things happen.
That's actually a very similar thing that they're doing, but
the way that this is set up is like it's already in creation so
you get to see it, but you're just paying like a third of the
cost. So we're like the decks are
normally, like, 90 each. I got both of them 470 together
so you make a pledge. But you know, that You're not
going to get the deck for like five, six months, you know what
I mean? So it's like I'm giving them the
money now to sustain the creation of the deck but the
real money is going to come in when it goes public but being a
supporter from the beginning, he's gonna throw in special
stuff, we get all these special update so it's more of an
intimate experience. Was that you you ever have
things in? This is a total subject change,
but you ever have things just completely disappear on you,
that you have been looking at and they should not have moved.
Actually, I was just talking to one of my men Mentor clients.
She said that when she was growing up, they had like a six
disc CD changer that would have like six CDs in it.
And she said, they would rotate because like, her mom would
always listen to like the Harry Potter books on.
CD. So she knew like the disc, 2 3,
and 4 should have been like the Harry Potter book and it would
be like, changed to like a Christmas CD or like some random
CD that like wasn't even in the changer.
And she said that her mom and who is very spiritually.
Driven had started really working with angels and
ancestors around the time that this was happening.
Actually, now that you say like that, the ancestors and what
not, and working with them, I guess that timing would line up
for me, too. I didn't unboxing right before
we recorded. There was a the girl hits, like
written a card and inside of an envelope.
And I had set it off to the side.
I put it on top of my tarot decks, and I was like, oh, when
I finished this unboxing, all read that I kept on, looking at
it, I finished the unboxing. I went to go grab the letter and
it's not there. I'm a Super tiny room.
I've gone through what I can think to go through.
And I'm just like I'm going to be packing up this room later
today. So I'll find it and I just can't
wait to see where it went because it fucking moved.
I mean, yeah, that's pretty intense, especially when it
happens like simultaneously right in front of your eyes.
It's kind of like well, okay maybe that's where I'm like, I
was literally staring at it while I was doing that.
I turn around to set the It's down.
I look back and it's not there. So I see her for you.
I absolutely am. So shocked by, how many people
are starting to wake up spiritually, like
simultaneously. Like it's almost like clockwork.
There's different waves of Awakening and a lot of people
really started to wake up during covid, but I feel like in this
last year, especially with all of the corrupt media and things
directly in people's faces. I feel like people are starting
to really see like holy shit. Like something's really off here
and that's all it takes is for people to open their eyes and
just be like, you know what? That doesn't make sense.
That doesn't hit. That's not what I want to
surrender to or commit to or consent to see and for me like I
love that there's a huge Awakening about a lot of things.
And I think that people are taking the blinders off on a lot
of different topics but I have Of a really hard time when
people go about it from a fear-based energy of like, oh my
God, it's just all gonna like crashdown whatever.
And I think that collectively, what you put your energy into is
what amplifies. So if you're scared about things
and when you have conversations with people and you try to
educate them on something and tell them, something you're
going to come at it from a fear standpoint and scare them.
And then that makes people act irrationally, not think things
through come from a victim And set instead of like a Victor
mindset and thinking about what you can do to make changes, it
just eats at your soul about what changes could happen.
And so, I love the Awakening energy.
And I think that the fact that there are so many spiritual
people coming awake to, to be able to help kind of shift and
he'll negative mindsets that are coming with, change is really
important too because if you have the healers to balance that
out, Out and energy workers to balance out that Collective
energy and to give Insight, I think that that balance is good
and I think the community aspect of like we're before people had
to keep their spirituality under the surface, but now you're
starting to see in a more mainstream light that people are
coming forward their teaching workshops and classes in
expanding. I will say that Saturn is going
into retrograde. In about like a week or two and
that's going to create a lot of clarity in people's subconscious
mind where we give a lot of emphasis to the powers outside
of us. We give a lot of consent to
Authority, whether it's your job or the government, or whoever,
we're always consenting to things.
That we feel like are out of our control, but with Saturn, moving
into retrograde in Pisces, you're going to have to set with
yourself. In the uncomfortable mess that
you maybe have made and work through that rather than just
tucking it under the surface. Like Saturn's going to keep
knocking on your skeleton door. It'll be like, hey, you need to
acknowledge this in the closet, you need to acknowledge your
Darkness, your shadows, your fears, because they're just
going to keep being brought to the Forefront in your reality,
whether that's from Tick-Tock or from other people.
If you live a fear-based reality internally, You're going to see
fear everywhere that you look. It's like The Truman Show,
whatever. You're paying attention to is
what you're going to see. And in that movie so many people
did not want him to see that he was the main character in a
story that they were watching and co-creating with him.
So I think that you know as we open our heart and mind
spiritually you have a fucking choice to make.
Are you going to build this foundation on fear or you going
to build this foundation on trust?
Trust in the unknown, trust that you didn't sign up to come here
to suffer. Also too on that is people can
also if you're if you're doing things like manipulating behind
other people's back door or talking about other people or
looking for somebody to have a flaw or something, then you
automatically are assuming that everybody is doing that and
return and you end up putting things on yourself and other
people and kind of making a reality for yourself that isn't
reality. And when you do that, Shift to
paying attention to what you have going on and like working
with like your spirit team or whatever, for like healing
yourself and things that you need to heal.
Instead of like checking in with your spirit, seemed to do to see
what like so-and-so is doing. Or, you know, if somebody else's
actions are aligned or what not, your reality will totally shift
in the people who will come in, your life, will shift in the
relationships that you have with other people will shift, because
you're no longer. You're hyper fixated on
uncovering, some kind of truth about others.
You will uncover your own truths and be able to do like your own
healing and change your reality and through that you're going to
found find that you were hiding. Certain parts of yourself that
you were running from certain parts of yourself, you know, I
know that I have a tendency to be controlling and that's why I
have really worked on, like my control issues.
And now people may think that I just don't give a fuck at all
because where I used to want to try to dictate and control
things. Now I'm just like, I'm going to
let you do you and I'm going to watch you.
And then I'm just going to take notes on what your first choice
was because if I tell you how to react, or I tell you how to
think, or I tell you how I want you to move, that's not you.
I would much rather give someone the freedom to make the choices
that they want to make without trying to dictate or control
their actions. You're going to learn a lot.
A lot more about your partner, your friends, or whoever, if you
give them space, to make the decision because you're going to
see what their first choice was rather than you trying to
dictate and change what someone wants, you know, like people say
once a cheater, always a cheater.
I don't agree with that because some people astray because
they're not getting fulfilled in the relationship.
Does it mean that they're not going to meet someone in the
future? That makes them want to level up
and change their ways you know? The one who's going to make them
acknowledge their Shadow aspects.
And I think that so many people want to box you in 20, you used
to be this or you was this, or you used to do that.
And so, when you show up in your new form, as your new version of
yourself, they want to keep you limited to that old version.
And that's where there is a tendency to let those old
feelings, and thoughts come back to the surface to prove them
wrong to, you know, to tell them off to express your feelings.
But really, I think being more nonchalant rather than trying to
dictate or control anything. As really got me a lot further
because now people think they're making the choice on their own.
and maybe they are, maybe they're not but energetically I
am going to set the vibration that I want to match with and
when people fall off of that vibration, I do not take it
personal I'm just trying to think because, when we hung out
together, controlling you being controlling of anything, isn't
something that I would use to describe you.
Like, we had a lot of situations where there were like choices to
make and whatever, but I didn't find you controlling.
What I do find though, is that I think that you're an assertive
speaker and so you know, if you're all, we'll just cash out
me later. You're like, that's not what I'm
doing. I'm going to do this right now.
Like this is I'm going to be doing and I didn't find you at
all trying to control anybody else's actions or behavior.
I really found you to be confident and certain about what
you were wanting for yourself and being comfortable enough to
be like. Well, that's not what I want to
be doing. So I'm going to do this and it
gives the opportunity for people to either follow or do what they
want to do on their own. But it doesn't, you know, when I
think of control Saying I would just think of somebody being
like, oh, no, don't do it like that.
Oh no. Don't do it like that.
The only thing that you were like really specific about.
I feel like was your sandwich. You wanted your sandwich made a
certain way and like, of course, like you're going to put that in
your face, but I, I value that I like that.
I know. I like not having somebody
around who I have to be like, oh, I wonder what they're
thinking? I wonder what they're feeling
like. Some people really make you
feel. Feel like you have to walk on
eggshells, around them because you don't know what their
response to something's going to be.
You want to make sure that they're comfortable, because
they seemed so uncomfortable in their own skin.
And I appreciate that, like, I never had to worry about that.
Even if you were like, being quiet or something, I know why
you're being quiet and still and that's okay.
I am very particular about food when I go to a restaurant.
Like I am editing everything on this menu and I'm going to tell
you up front. I want 32 ounces of ranch on the
side. I don't want anything less than
that. So if you've got 12 ounce
ramekins I need three do the math.
No I am very much a very particular about food and a lot
of people when they go out to you and me, I'm not like rude
about it. I'm just straight up.
Like I want the bread toasted, I want the pizza, well done and
I'm talking. Like if it's not well done,
you're going to say I get back and I don't say it like in a
mean way. I'm just like, very assertive.
I do not play about food and its presentation, I needed a certain
way layered, a certain way. So, that's very true, but I
don't know, I think my stubborn qualities in relationships and
friendships in the past. I was controlling because I hung
out with people who were Reckless and that they needed me
to Mother them like they needed someone to be like, no that's
wrong. But now I just don't hang out
with people like that. So I do You to bring those
Tendencies out, but if I hung out with a bunch of dumbasses
again and had a bunch of just muchi user and abuser type
friends, then yeah, I probably would have to control him boss
them around because they don't know how to navigate their life
but I'm real big on like I can give you the information and you
can do whatever you want with it.
Like I'm not going to get worked up.
If I teach you how to do something and you continue doing
it the harder way or the opposite way.
I'm not going to be upset if someone Pays me for a reading
and does nothing with it. The only thing I am going to be
upset is when you project that enact and in what I want to say
inconsistency back to me like I was supposed to do something
different. Like I provided my end of the
bargain. So I just think that I've
limited the people that bring out those Shadow aspects of me
because I don't want to be controlled and I don't want to
control others. I want it to be a mutual benefit
of like, I'm going to do this. And if you want to go lay by the
pool all day, while We go to a museum, then you do you?
I'm not mad. We got back, we get ready, we go
to dinner, like, there's no problem.
I'm not one of those people that like leaves and elephant in the
room because you chose to go to the pool while I did something
else. Letting other people be their
own independent people without you having to control what what
you're doing or what they're doing.
And also in something that you were saying, you're doing what
you're doing from like your highest sense of good when it
comes to readings, whatever you're like I've done what like
my purpose is and what I'm supposed to do if you decide to
take that information, like that's all on you, that's for
you to do. And I kind of also feel that way
now about Out, and it took a long time to get to the point of
being so comfortable. In what I bring to the table as
a person that I'm that way about like relationship follow or, you
know, friendship fall outs or whatever to of like, oh, okay.
Well, I know like what my intentions are and what I
brought to the table. So the fact that that's not
enough for you is completely fine, go on and do your own
thing. But we're not going to sit here
and dwell on it. And we're not going to have
passive aggressive feelings about things or not communicate,
because, From my perspective, I've put it in the best that I
possibly could and did things. The way that like I was being
divinely led to do it and now it's your turn to do what you
need to do on your end. And I think that's like a
certain level of Detachment as a sensitive spiritual empathetic
type person. Like I can literally get
physically ill based on other people's emotions and feelings
like if someone's holding on to a lot of resentment or sexual
trauma or something like that, it will make me physically throw
up if I let it. So I went there before but way
before I protected my energy and really knew what I was doing
where I thought I was going to help someone and Sit down to
start channeling for them and then I in bodied their emotions
in like didn't have any barrier between like, my emotions and
their emotions. And so now the last thing that I
really want to do is be around people who don't do the work
because it just bleeds on to everyone, like the people who
don't do the work bleed on to everyone, even the even those
who did not cut them kind of thing, you know what I mean?
And that's where I have to draw the line when people come into
my life or in, My community or into wherever about how much I'm
going to let this person try to bring those Shadow aspects out
of me before I set them all the way fucking straight because
what happens is when you hang around people who are not doing
the work, who do not have any healing goals or anything in
sight, they are going to project, they're going to
manipulate. They're going to coerce you into
feeding their narrative. So if someone you're in a
relationship with is extremely jealous, they're going to do
things that make you Insecure. So that you will feel jealous,
they want you to feel what they feel, they want you to live the
life. They live in that projection
using one another, as a mirror can be detrimental or it could
be inspirational and elevational but at the same time it's like
what experience are you committing to have?
Because if you're not committing to the experience of joy,
prosperity harm, Harmony whatever, then you are choosing
fear, then you are choosing chaos, you are choosing those
things. And a lot of it has to do with
our upbringing and our environment things that we did
not choose but as a grown adult, you've got to take full ten toes
down responsibility for how you're so perpetuating, that
same system, how you're projecting that system onto your
kids or your friends, or your co-workers, and take
accountability that just because you had a great childhood and
can't think of any trauma. Does it mean, you're not the one
enforcing trauma on to other people by your lack of
accountability and your lack of self-awareness?
And I think that people take, I don't know what energy to
explain a like, a sure energy, or confident energy about what
your expectations, are people take that as being closed off
or, you know, being a bitch or whatever.
And really, it comes into if somebody isn't their energy
doesn't align for you and you feel like, oh, this energy is
bitchier, this energy seems closed off move on and find
different. Energy and obviously that
person's boundary doesn't work for you.
There are people that I meet to that like I don't like them when
I meet them and I won't have anything to do with them.
That doesn't mean that there's something wrong with that
person. It just means that whatever they
got going on. It isn't a line for me at that
time and they have every right to express themselves and be
themselves and whatever the way they want to, and we have the
choice to say. I'm not fucking with that and
move on and keep it pushing. And let it go and not need to
convince people of your story or to make this person a Villain
Like not everyone that you disconnect with is a villain.
There doesn't have to be some huge chaotic story that you live
on of why you don't fuck with this person.
There's been plenty of times that I was a shitty friend in
later in my healing Journey realized that I was a shitty
friend and reached out to one person in particular and she
said is great as it is to hear from you.
I'm married. I have a kid and I don't want
anything to do with you and that was basically her story.
And I wasn't like, I didn't take it personal because I realized
that my actions and things that we partook in together, back in
the day, lived on for her, where it may just was a regular
Tuesday for me. I did something that heard that
has lingered to the point where in our adult life, she wants
nothing to do with me and is does that make her a bad person?
Does that make me Basher on the internet?
Know, my mom and her are still Facebook friends.
At the same time, I had to tell my mom.
I don't want to hear about her life.
I don't want you to tell me about her kid anymore.
Like, let her beat her, I'll be me and we'll just chalk it up
that we sell out, you know, and then there's people who
literally abuse their kids, you know, move to Europe and do
drugs all the time. At the same time like there's so
many different elements of these people that I thought would be
in my life forever but there's a reason that they're not in my
life because I would never fuck with a bitch who would sign over
her. Rights to our child and moved to
Europe. Sorry, I can't fuck with you as
a woman as a person. I don't care who you are.
Not my best friend. You ain't my best friend, you
know. So whenever I look back at some
of these people that I used to associate with, we're not even
in alignment, but that doesn't make them a bad person.
It just means that I no longer am I vibrational match.
So I can't really speak on what they do in survival mode or what
they do in lower vibration. Because when I was in those
modes, I was also there. Side-by-side calling them, my
sister and my best friend. So in their adult life that they
feel like they're healed and they want nothing to do with me,
that's on them, right? Because then there's a whole lot
of flip side of that of people who beg for my attention that I
want nothing to do with right. So it's like, it's a full circle
thing. You're not going to fuck with
everyone all the time and just because, you know, someone
doesn't mean you're going to be cool forever.
And I love the respect that you have on that person's boundary
to where you're like, I reached back out, you know, Look like
countability or whatever, for whatever part you would played.
And they said, thanks, but it doesn't fix anything and you
moved on. You didn't Fester over and go.
I can't believe it. And that's like a respect thing.
I've had people who have literally never talked to me all
of a sudden have like narratives in conversations and you know, I
heard from so-and-so and well I don't know the details but I'm
going to say these things and that for me is what's like more
fucking ringleader action. In than people that I actually
know because if you know, somebody and you've had, you
know, like you're falling out or whatever.
There's two sides like, okay? I could take, you know, my, my
accountability for this, that's where they fucked up.
But, you know, whatever. But if it like, sometimes it
just be random people on the internet and you're just like,
I, I'm so confused. How do you have a whole?
How do you have a whole narrative on who I am as a
person but we've never had a conversation.
But you like all my Instagram posts and And send me cute.
Smiley faces. I what do you mean, honestly, I
don't know what people's true motives are because I've never
been a motive driven person because I'm always a leader.
I always got my own like I'm always in my Lane regardless
when I was in Shadow aspect or you know, lower vibrational
connections. I still feel like those people
were looking to me for guidance and I was the ringleader or the
leader of some sort even though they didn't.
Want to admit that I feel like a lot of these people hung around
me to learn from me because a lot of them knew.
I wasn't like them, like, and I don't mean that way.
But like, I grew up where you grew up, but I think a lot of
them could see like, she's not meant to be here, she won't be
here if she figures out that she's not meant to be here and
as soon as I did and, you know, chose to go to college and do
things other people were not doing, I was so jealous of the
people that were going to fucking paying them all and
South Carolina and doing all these cool things while I was in
school. Like I remember looking back and
seeing People go on these little boat trips and these concerts
and festivals and things like that.
And now I look at those people and I'm not trying to be a hater
but they work at Sally's or wherever like, they're not doing
anything that I'm competing with are upset with now.
So it's like fucking off and having fun always looks fun,
that's always a goal. But when you do that at the
expense of your own personal growth and your own mental
health and your own success, you're the only one to blame.
Like when I look back on all those years of thoughtless
living, I'm Not blaming who I was hanging out with.
I'm not blaming my ex or my family.
I'm being like, wow, that was fucked up that they participated
but I'm taking accountability on the fact that I went and picked
them up or I drove my car or I paid for, you know, I don't know
they're gold tooth or whatever like it doesn't matter like at
the same time, I wasn't out getting my name tattooed or
getting names. Tattooed on me, but I was
letting people tattoo my name on them obviously.
Having trauma bonds, you know what I mean?
Like I was keeping that shit. Alive.
Yes. Just to clear up any people have
your name tattooed on them too and really do.
They have wieners. Yeah, 03, I'm leaners but we'll
say in symbolization two people have gone eyes on one person.
Got something that was for me. Sweet baby.
Jesus. All right here, just corrupting
the world in people's flesh. She said, but I didn't get
anybody's name tattooed on me. If I was, if I was to think
something about you, it would absolutely be that you're the
type of girl who has people have their name tattooed on them and
has never tattooed anybody else's name on yourself.
I mean, one time I saw this thing on the internet and it
said, I don't know what kind of sex people be having that makes
them want to tattoo each other's names.
James, but I haven't had it yet. And I've really been looking for
it because like if it's out there, I'm not opposed to a name
like I'm not opposed, I'm just saying like it's got to be real.
It's got to be like bunny has jellies like thing.
Yeah. But you you I feel like you and
you and Q would have to come up with a design for the name where
he could easily cover it up and turn it into like some beautiful
piece of art. He would BB.
And you know what's crazy about that is if I ever did That sadly
I probably wouldn't have him do it because it would be like a
spur-of-the-moment thing. Probably, it wouldn't be like, I
planned to get someone's name. It would be like, we're in Vegas
and we just got married. And now we're going to get each
other's names, right? Like you're going to go back to.
You're going to go back to Kentucky, but the fucking tramp
stamp of ha ha. I don't know, but I don't know.
I'm just saying, like, I've never had anyone in this world,
who rocked my world like that. It.
So, if you're out there and you're listening call me, I
would, I just don't, I don't really yeah.
No I don't want anybody's name tattooed on my body.
I have mac my kid's name. That's it.
But I would do like like symbolic tattoos.
That's me. Yes, I loved it when he said
that's me. He wanted everyone to know.
Um, the cool thing about life in everything that's happening, is
nothing I've ever done, was permanent.
I didn't make any like decisions that led to like a permanent
lifelong consequence. I got never had a crazy love
child or any of those things. So when I look back at my life
and like living in those lower vibrational moments, I was
having fun. I was careless as fuck and could
have literally died. Probably at any minute with some
of the scenarios and car rides that I put myself in like, oh my
God, the car rides. It makes zero sense of why 14 15
16 year old girls were riding around with 20 year old boys and
their car. I mean yes we walk down to the
church parking lot and got in the car.
So we knew it wasn't right but you also were the adult in this
situation. So it's like weird energy and
then Just the top off, all the things I lied about.
Like, I'm staying here and staying there.
I will tell a really funny story so I'll never forget this.
I was a sophomore in high school.
It was Presidents Day. So we had Monday off of school
and it was a Sunday night. My dad obviously had to work
President's Day. Like the world doesn't stop
working for that. So he couldn't take me to school
that next morning or I'm sorry. He wasn't going to have to take
me to school that next morning so he was going to try to pick
up some overtime. So I decided that I was going to
lie and say that I was staying with my friend.
Mackenzie And Mackenzie wasn't even in the equation, she wasn't
even in the equation. I don't even know where she was
like, she probably was at home. Doing the right thing.
I said I'm going to be with Mackenzie and ended up going to
hang out with three of my friends, guys and girls just no
one that my dad like new. So I couldn't say I was with
that girl because he would have been like hell no at this point.
Like he trusts him again. Z's, mom knew I stayed over
there, whatever. So my dad being a single father,
got a phone call about 4:00 or 5:00 in the morning.
Being from lmpd that, they had his daughter and that she had
been gang raped. That's that's what they had
said. They told my dad that I had been
gang-raped. I had not even been raped.
There was no sex involved. There was no sex involved.
It was crazy because we were at this house that my friend,
Josh's sister and she was kind of like the cool sister that at
the time was like 26, 27. Let her brother and his friends
stay at her house and basically Would babysit her kids.
So we would sometimes have like her 7 year old and her
nine-year-old whole other story, I'm sorry.
Yeah, this girl this lady when I look back on her, was the
craziest person I've ever came into contact with in real life
and I don't even know if she's alive still.
But her name was Farrah and you will never forget Fair, like she
always a Farrah, she had sugar daddies.
She did this, she did that, but she always had the party spot,
like, no matter if she moved every six months, we always were
able to To take full reign of her house.
So it was me three people at her house.
She was not home, someone knocked on the door and they
said we're here to see Pharaoh. There was six guys.
I don't know who they were. This ain't my house.
I'm 15 six guys, came and knocked on the door, knocked on
the door. And they said we are here to see
Pharaoh when, when my friend Josh opened the door they
stormed in they stormed it. So there's all these people, I'm
talking all these people and they're all wearing black and
they all look like drug dealers. And we then later, found out.
She met them at the gas station and didn't even know them.
But gave them her address and said, stop by and So when
regular Sunday night, they're on the run from the cops and they
decide to run up on their new friend Pharaoh's house who
they've never met besides that one time at the gas station,
which was earlier in the week, decide to come into her house.
When when we open the door and they came in the cops took that
as a signal that we knew J-Kwon and all these people who I
didn't know their names, I didn't know anyone's name and
I'm being dead ass serious. I will never forget J-Kwon
because his grandma and his mom and his dad.
Dad all came inside the house when they started calling
people's parents, some of these boys were underage they took
that over age once like one jumped out the window.
Stuck 4 ounces of weed in her dryer which she never cleaned
her did laundry. So she didn't find that for like
a month. So he had jumped out the back
window was so when he evaded on foot, they took that upon
themselves that we were in on it, because they were in our
house, the back windows open, dude.
Done jumped out the window. Like, their whole plan was to
come into this. House and distract the cops
while that dude jumped out the back window regardless with you
know what I mean. Like he was going to jump out
the window for my understanding regardless it was more of like a
sting operation like let's throw off the cops maybe those girls
got drugs. She told us she did so maybe
that'll help this bitch ain't even home.
I'm 15 years old. My friend Josh I think is like
17. It was a whole mess.
I won't even name drop anybody else because I don't know whose
parents even came and got them that like it was some Go
activity. So we're setting there and Jake
wands, grandmother dad and I guess mom came inside and his
dad starts preaching at this point at this point where he's
like, you got your grandmother out here on her deathbed, on her
deathbed and she's in a wheelchair and this woman
shriveled like 97 years old and they're like J-Kwon.
I just, I can't believe you do this to your Grandmama to your
Grandmama. And it just went on for like,
Hours to the point where everyone else's parents had came
and got them and I was like the last person there because I like
refused to give them my dad's number.
Like I was giving them, my mom, my grandma.
I was giving every number, I could think of, besides my dad,
because I knew if my dad answered that call like it was
going to be bad, he came and got me and I will never forget at
4:30 a.m. this man had to be at work in like two hours showed up
in his Oldsmobile. He has He had never been so mad
at me because he was fucking silent.
This man to not say a fucking word and my dad's very vocal me
and my dad are both Torah says like he's a very vocal person so
that was probably like the Tipping Moment For the First
Time Of Me ever, like really getting into trouble and
realizing that I was from that point forward I have to lie
about everything because everything I had been doing that
was not even a bad part of it. Like that was just me want to
hang out with my friends. Not have to go in it. 10:00, you
know what I mean? That was more.
Just, my curfew was always early while everyone else is was
midnight and that was me just wanting to hang out with my
friends and we were not drinking.
There was no drugs there. The only drugs that were there
were the people who brought drugs.
So, basically, all this transpired into the point, where
Pharaoh came home at like, 8:00 in the morning and her house is
empty. When she knew that Josh and all
of us were there, where were her kids, they were with of their
dad that time like they broke. But sometimes like that was the
motive of her wanting Josh's little early friends to be over
there. So we would take care of the
kids and she just buys like a fifth of us.
How did, how did, how did the cops turn it into?
You got gang raped but there was a female cop in two guys and I
don't know if anyone here listening is ever had a dealing
with a female cop as a female, but she basically was going off
on me and like, freaking out on me and I don't know, she just, I
guess because I got It give them my dad's number and they kept
calling these numbers. I think they just thought there
was more to it and they were going to like fear Monger me,
but that story like lives on rent-free in my psyche because I
have never been in more trouble. My dad took my phone away.
I think, for a literally three months, like I had a phone at 11
years old. So like getting my phone taken
away for three months was like, I didn't even know that could
even be possible. Like I would literally be at the
house. No house phone, no nothing.
I could get my phone. Out of my dad's safe for like
until he got home basically. Just so he could contact me.
That was it? I too was the party child and I
had early curfew and like you can't go hang out with older
people, whatever. And my thing with my parents was
they knew where I was? They just didn't like it.
Like, I had a couple times that like I snuck out or I didn't
come home or whatever which like Apparent.
Now I'm like that's the scariest thing.
All of a sudden your kid just doesn't come home and you
haven't heard anything but it eventually got to the point that
I was so tired of like not saying where I was or whatever
that I would be like and I'm gonna go stay at so-and-so's
house but you're not allowed to but I'm not asking a question.
I'm just letting you know that I'll be staying at so-and-so's
house and so up until sophomore year.
It was pretty sneaky, and then Junior and Senior year.
It was I'm going to go do whatever the fuck I want.
This is where I'll be and I'm really surprised that my mom
didn't kill me and I'm still here to tell the tale.
Honestly, what was crazy as my mom was the party mom.
So moving in with my father during high school was like a
hot mess but I truly believe that if I would have stayed
under my mom's watch all of high school but I would have been on
16 & Pregnant. Like I would have been on the
show. Like I would have been That
would have been my lap. So I look back on that.
I'm like, you know, there was so much being put in our face about
teen pregnancy, right? At the time, that I was those
ages and there were girls that went on to those shows, like,
not teen 16 and Pregnant or Teen Mom per se, but I had a girl in
my sophomore class that went on the show, that was basically
about out of control teenagers and basically like, you know
what I mean. So, I was hanging out with some
bad kids and the weird thing about it though is those are
always the kids that Lived with their grandparents, the bad kids
were always the people that lived at their grandparents.
Like that's just the facts. So getting out of my mom's
watching on to my dad's, like military style, watch
definitely, save me. Definitely is the reason that my
credit score is what it is because my dad is like work hard
pay for your shit, do not go get a car payment just because you
can buy it in cash pay for it own it like my dad is very
methodical so you know that moment when I knew my dad was so
mad at me and Going to be like it did really hurt but I was
also going through puberty. And my dad was like he was not
equipped to understand his teenage daughter who he barely
knew going through puberty like he wasn't with it.
Like he wasn't, he wasn't emotionally receptive which
created a lot of resentment and anger and Rebellion for me,
like, it was more of a rebellious thing.
I never snuck out because I knew if he woke up, he would fucking
kill me when I got back. Like there wouldn't be no coming
back. There would be like the craziest
on Taraj. But my dad is much as he's not
emotionally driven, he does not play games.
Like he used to date like really psycho biker girls because my
dad's a biker. So he'd he dates like girls who
have Harley-Davidson tramp stamps.
Like that's my dad's Jam. Like, oh my God - I'm bad at the
same time. So like, he's with the fit.
Like he's like, do you have the Pamela Anderson barbed wire
around your arm if you do? Here's my number.
So, during High School, my dad had like this.
And who was this biker chick, who everybody in the biker
Community called her a black widow because her husband had
died and she inherited all this money.
Yada yada. Never liked this girl.
My dad kicked this bitch on the street on Christmas because she
was talking mad. Shit, she started, she started
on me. He said if you say one more
thing to my daughter I'm kicking you.
And your daughter out right now and this bitch got my face like
she was going to hit me. I've never seen my dad, like,
like this. Like he didn't put his hands on
her, but he came between us and started getting these big boy.
White trash bags and putting brand-new Christmas stuff.
He took the Christmas tree and threw it out in the front yard.
Like, I've never seen my dad act like this, so my dad is one of
those people that like, he's a loose fucking Cannon when he's
upset. So when he was silent, I was
like, oh shit. I'm in fucking, I'm myself.
And that's where like he didn't give me a car.
Like I didn't get a card 16 period.
I could use a car and I could call it mine and put something
like, around the rearview mirror, like ale, or an air
freshener or something. But that motherfucker was You
can put seat covers on it, but that shouldn't years parole.
And then the first moment that I objected, but seat covers on it,
but that's sitting here. It's the first time I met that,
man, that as, like an adult 16 17 year-old, they were like, he
was like, stir Orchid Park it? That was that like, he, he does
not fly. And so, I don't know, like, a
lot of the things that I went through as a child, I think for
a rebellious like towards him and resentment towards my mom,
but then as like an adult, I was still making those crazy s
decision. Asians and weighs just like,
hanging out, people like that. Like, what 28 roads going to
leave a bunch of 15. 16 17 year-olds drinking with her
children. I'm talking young children.
That could be touched or whatever late.
I'm not saying that's what happened but I'm just saying
like he's fucking kids are watching teenagers, get fucked
up and we're painting their nails afterwards.
We're hanging out. There are so many things that I
look back on from one. Like I was a teenager and so
many situations and like, people that I thought were like cool to
hang out with Or whatever. And or oh my gosh, your parents
are so cool because you don't have to, like your parents don't
have to meet them first, like I wasn't allowed to go and do
anything of my parents didn't know their parents and then
other people being like, well, my mom thinks that it's super
weird that your mom wants to meet her.
And so then I was just like uncomfortable when in reality, I
look back and I'm like that Mom didn't want to meet my mom
because she was high on meth. Like there's a reason that she
didn't want to, it's because she didn't want to be judged.
It's not, you know, whatever. And a lot of there was so much
predatory, like, behavior and allowances that I didn't realize
as a kid, like so many grown men hanging out with teenage girls
and stuff like that that I didn't think was weird because
they you know, the conversations around aren't weird.
It's like a normalized thing and I always thought that it was
like small Mountain Behavior, whatever small town but no it's
All over the place. It's not just small, Township.
It happens all the time. And like, I love the memes that
are like 15 year old me, wasn't scared to walk in the ghetto
with a dead phone at 2 a.m., but I get anxiety going, grocery
shopping alone now and really, that's the really good.
So deep in my eye, I also have bike been in situations where
like, bad things did happen to me because I put myself inside
of Haitians and I didn't know how to read people's, I think.
I'm so hyper. Vigilant on, like, reading
people and understanding their motives now and like trying to
understand because I went for so long in my life.
Having no understanding of, but you said this.
So, how come you're doing something different?
You're being dishonest because I always just figured you would
say what you mean and mean what you say?
And if you say you're this kind of person, that's the kind of
person that you should be. And there's not enough, I think
discussion with parents and their kids about having Street
smarts and learning how to read people and learning how to
understand that. Just because somebody looks like
they're I'm having this conversation with my son right
now and he's 7, just because somebody looks like they're a
nice person doesn't mean that they're a nice person.
Somebody can look and say nice things and they can still have
all kinds of Secrets. And as like, they could be a
serial Oh killer, they could not put their milk back in the
fridge. Like there could be different
extremes of how weird these people are.
The thing is that I don't get is.
Why was it so normalized? And is that still happening with
12, 13, 14, 15, year-olds today, because they look like 30, some
of these girls, like, the way that they have grown up in the
Kardashian generation, as I'll call it.
They're hyper fixated on, their looks their Some of these 13 14
year old girls literally contoured their face and they
don't have anything to Contour Contours to make your face look,
thinner and more chiseled, like your child, you're a fucking
child. Your face is even done,
developing, how are you going to Contour something that's like
not even done settling you know the mean like I'm growing baby
girl. I don't know how you're gonna do
that but that has been a huge controversy with Alabama Barker
Travis Barker's daughter and I'm not even like a huge, I hate the
Kardashians. I know you said, you watch their
show. I've never watched one episode.
The only thing I know about them is through the means through the
media through what is viral, that I can't not see, right?
Like the ugly crying Kim and, you know, things like that, like
I can't not see it because Snapchat, or whoever is just
constantly putting it into my life.
But this Alabama Barker thing that I've noticed is like she's
drunk as fuck and her dad is like really sexualizing her and
capping on it. And I think that is from that
pedophilia thing where people do fantasize over these sixteen
Seventeen eighteen nineteen. Your old girl, same thing with
like that bad baby, girl, who I could give a fuck less about.
But, you know, these girls turning 18 and going on to only
fans. It's a proof that like people
were waiting for that or like how Leonardo DiCaprio only dates
girls that are like, in their 20s.
And every year that they get older, he just goes to someone
younger, right? And I just think that there's
something weird as fuck about sexualizing your child for gain
on the internet as well as icon. Tik-Tok that people do that with
children and children exploited. Ting their children, child
stars. If you will, Aaron Carter, if we
really want to go there, people exploit people and the one thing
that I just don't get is like what the interest as a grown
individual is and a child or a teenager.
And when I was a teenager, it makes you feel cool.
It gives you this validation this sense of recognition like,
oh, this 17 18 year. Old boy likes me.
No, no, no, they don't, and I just think it's crazy to me
because how much older all these kids look Now and then just
like, you know, we went through like the blue eye shadow and
like glitter or lip gloss face and like we went through like
crazy outfit. Like, you know, a lot of people
at 13 and 14, like we look like a Halo mess.
I'm so glad there was no documentation of the things
we're doing behind the scenes recording and playing with
Barbies and doing weird-ass shit.
Like, I'm so fucking glad that I don't have a video of me.
Piercing someones belly button with a safety pin because I did
that more than once. In my childhood, I have my belly
button fear for the safety fence.
Don't need that energy. You know like I don't need that
in my life. I don't need I don't need to be
around people who bring the shadow aspect out of me.
Like I can go to a bar in some Drunk Bitch, you know pops off
and it brings you right back down to that.
Shadow Self, that you're working, so hard to heal, or
you're in traffic, or someone says something to you.
And that's why I think the biggest reaction is like, no
reaction or Detachment. And I love that when people try
to come for me, I'm just so detached.
Because I'm just so seeing it through a higher perspective,
like, wow, like you are fighting with your lower self and blaming
me like that's crazy, but instead of like needing to rub
that in or come head from like an egotistical egotistical
standpoint, I'm just so detached.
I'm just like, of course, your course, you're upset with me.
I'm happy. Like, and you're not.
And that's what we're competing for.
It's not Material, it's not the nicest relationship or the
cutest pictures on Instagram. You're competing to be happy
with your Shadow Self. That's who you're competing with
because your Shadow Self tells you, you ain't shit.
You're always going to get the same results because look at
your dad. Look at your mom.
Look at your siblings. Look at your reality.
That part of you is the person that you're competing with the
people that are happy and living their own best.
Life are not thinking about ways to tear you down, because if we
were, we would not be defined in the happy category because happy
people are not worried about hurting other people, that's how
good things come to you is when you match with them
energetically. So, You're always being negative
or finding things to be negative about your attracting that I've
really found humor in bullshit lately and like in just like the
the shock of how people can perceive you like, you know,
regardless of how much you put out there, how much you show
yourself, people really can derive like whole, narratives
about who you are as as people and your motive, and your
energy, whatever. And And it really has made me
give less of a fuck. Because I've realized it doesn't
matter what version we put out. People are going to see and feel
what they want to see and feel about us and there is no.
Other option, but just like authentically being yourself and
they're going to be people who align with it and don't and
putting that on yourself just fucking sucks.
And I think that a lot of stuff in the last couple of months,
like everything that we went through with Utah, and our
communities or whatever, because really been for like a
recognition of how far we have come like on a healing Journey
inside of friendship, and things like that.
And I think that us meeting and you Chaw and dealing with
everything that we dealt with really helped us for shit.
That was going to pop off when we were in person together,
because we've seen how we navigate inside of difficult
situations and that for me, like, I don't care what somebody
random says. I care about the people who
like, I respect and value, I do care about what they think and
so it means a lot to me knowing that, you know, somebody I can
trust that somebody Can say something about me or about you
and immediately. It's, I know their character.
That's not true. I know who they are.
I don't, you know, whatever and not give it any more energy.
And then going back to what you had said about like the
Kardashian thing. I don't I don't fuck with them
now. But in the beginning, the way
that they started off was very much like almost like how jelly
and Bunny did where it's worth showing you like, what we're
doing at the bottom and like all of the things that are
difficult, they started their ship before there was Fame, it
was really an example of seeing, you know, a family who was like
had toxic bonds but was trying Like healing, go through it and
then like make something of their lives and that ended up
like spiraling and it has morphed into something just
completely unrelatable and completely materialistic driven.
But at the beginning it wasn't that way.
And so I think that it's an example, two of you can love and
support different versions of people and just because you have
rocked for somebody or like hat, you know, felt some kind of
connection if things are evolving.
Loving than it's not still going to be that way.
Like it's okay to be like, I like that version but now that
like you've evolved and done this.
I'm glad that works for you and like you seem happy with that
but that's not what I want. And they also exploit their kids
to get where they're at, and I don't like that.
Part is so gross to me like as a parent.
I don't even put my kid online and like, I just did a video
with them recently. And I put a sticker over his
face because I don't even post them privately on my Facebook
really because I just don't think that your kids need to be
on the internet. Somebody is looking at, you
know, people post, like, pictures of their little girls
dancing and dresses and stuff and like, as you should because
those are Babies. And, and There should be like
you should be able to do that but there are people that are
predators and that keep videos. And there was a this lady had
posted a video of Fourth of July.
It was like two years ago. I've heard her daughter eating
hot dogs at a race on Fourth of July and ended up going to like
some pedophilic website and whatever.
And the mom was crying on her Tick-Tock and was like,
devastated about it and That's the kind of shit.
It doesn't matter how innocent your stuff is.
So keep your kids off the internet and if you have
teenagers you exploiting your daughters and house.
You know hot they are or having them walk around in their bra
and underwear whatever. It's just super weird.
The thing I don't like about it for me is that your kids are
having no consent whether they want a digital footprint or not.
And that's really where I think that there's a lot of privacy
issues as we do publicly. It's so much out there to the
world but you're putting your child's like birthday and time
and full name as soon as they're born with a photo of them and
starting an energetic, you know, of digital footprint.
That's going to live on and I'll be honest like as an astrologer
getting. Someone's birth time is almost
kind of like their social security number.
Like, there's so many people that I would love to read their
chart, but asking them for their birth time is invasive.
If something is yet in invasive, you probably wouldn't want to
just nonchalantly, post that. And I think some people think,
oh my God, you know, I've only got friends on my Facebook or
whatever, you know, often a friend on your Facebook gets
hacked and the hacker does not post a bunch of dumb shit but
keeps control of their account. And those 3,000 friends, and
then we'll later remove everything that leaves traces of
the person they hacked and and add their profile to it.
And I'm seeing that with scammers because it'll tell you
how many times they Change their username, it's easy to acquire,
an account through, whatever means and then change its user
name many times. So to think that everyone on
your friends list, that any constant time is going to be who
they say, they are isn't accurate and you should just
reconsider. Like, if you're listening and
you're like, oh shit, like I've done that or whatever.
Try to Archive the post. So that way you like you do have
that memory or like hide who can see it and make it only you or
something like that. I would just recommend And like
being more methodical in the ways that you portray yourself
and your children on the internet, just because people
are fucking weird, and just not that I'm like, gonna hinder
living my life because of people because I just carry a gun
instead. But at the same time, like
children don't really have the luxury.
And when you're telling the internet where they go to
school, posting them and uniforms at filled days at
sporting events in outfits, that I don't approve of, and I've
spoke on this before. What the fuck is up with these
little girls from ages like 2217, wearing these leotards and
these tiny bloomers and skirts at these competitions,
especially the ones that people pay for like the pageant style
ones. Like we're people pay for the
traveling teams. Those are the worst.
I think pageants for kids are disgusting and the fact that you
want to put little kids and full on makeup and hair do's and
dressing scantily and wearing crop Up top, sand, whatever.
I mean, we have my stepdaughters 10 and when she comes over
during the summer, her mom lets her wear like short shorts and
crop tops and stuff. And I'm like you know what if
that's the rule that she wants to have at her house and
whatever like I'm not going to shit talk that that's on you
guys but when you're here your belly buttons, not hanging out.
You're not going out wearing makeup, you're not wearing tiny
little shorts. Nobody needs to see you dressed
like that. Like there's there's not a
reason that you need to dress like that because you wearing
shorts. That are an inch longer and
covering your belly button is not going to make you overheat
in the summer. I used to be that child that my
mom, let me wear whatever I want when I was younger like that.
And I would come to like my dad's house on the weekend and
would go somewhere with like people in his family and his
sister who used to get on my nerves.
So the maximum she would do that.
Like you can't wear that you're not wearing that do du du du du
and what's funny is I actually because I'm a grown adult, I am
more than willing to admit. Where as a child, I didn't agree
with something but as an adult, I see.
The validity in it. I may not exactly but I see a
lot of validity and what she was saying.
And I also not even having a child yet, have decided that my
kid is not doing certain things that are like allowed.
And I think every so many generations crop tops gets
filtered back in for children like they'll go away for a
little bit and then they come back in and my generation it was
in for children to wear crop tops and my mom would let me and
what's so weird about that. Is when I look back, On that,
it's like I'm a child and I want to do these things because you
want to be older, you want to be whatever.
But when you're seeing Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera
and all these people wear crop tops, you just think it's okay.
But it's just amazing to me when I look back at things that I
thought like, oh my God, no problem with that.
As a child, as an adult. I'm like Hill to the mall.
We are not doing that. I don't really even like water
parks for that instance, with children.
Because so many weirdos, I I agree.
And also, you know, there are a there, a lot of people who
Condone anarchism a, with pedophilic behavior.
And, you know, make terms like, like instead of calling them
pedophiles. Now, there are people advocating
for calling them Maps, minor attracted, people's and like
making it. It's like own category and then
having things like well it's okay if they like have the
thoughts or whatever as long as they don't act on it and all
that you're doing is making the Comfort level more and more and
more, where it's Optical and then pretty soon.
It's going to be well, it's not a big deal because she was 15
that's close to 80. Well, it's not a big deal
because she was 12, you know, started hip-hop Uberti.
So it's not like she was like super little, you know, and then
slowly it starts going and I say she but it also happens to boys.
It's not a gender specific thing.
People, you know, whatever and we really do live in a time
where I mean Epstein is a perfect example where like being
pedophilic is so integrated into things that doing pageants,
doing whatever being in Hollywood being an actress, all
of these things have always happened behind the scenes.
Those people don't just go away, they just find different ways to
do things. So if you are giving them easy
targets by having your kids online, having your kids walking
out in public again, taking them to water parks or whatever,
where Predators know that kids are half closed.
Like its I don't like going to water parks and things like that
and also on top of like, whatever the water is fucking
disgusting and everybody gets ringworm or coochie Vitus or
whatever and I don't want it. What's so wild that we're
talking about? This is, I've decided that I'm
going to start dumb blond over from the beginning.
So I'm in like quarantine episodes right now where
everyone wanted a pool. Like, if you didn't have a
fucking pool, everyone really wanted a pool during quarantine
because I was like, The only thing so as listener like to the
episode with her and Charlie classic, like one of the First
episodes that they'd ever done, where he actually does that
voiceover that she used for the theme song like fun.
So I'm listening this episode and they start talking about
water parks and how they both worked at water parks and we're
like lifeguards, periodically and Bunny was like a shit in the
lazy pool and he was like what? And she was like, I mean I asked
to go to the restroom and like no one would let me.
She was like, I mean it was a lazy pool, like, you could have
just went to the restroom. It was like it was like she was
like let's just say I shit in the bowl or whatever.
I don't know. It's just so funny because it is
wild what happens behind the scenes at a water park for
people that work there as well. But let's just say the sum up
this episode kids are doing crazy as shit on the internet
with far beyond our imagination because I didn't even have the
internet. It was doing crazy creative
things. I think that you're either on
the Spectrum where your kid is scared of everything and doesn't
want to leave the house or you got the rebellious child who's
doing crazy as things that you need to reconsider how much
access they have an ability to do.
Because I know for a fact, a lot of the things that I did will go
to the Grave because I didn't get caught.
But that story I told you earlier is an iconic that
everyone knows about, it's an iconic story.
That is public knowledge now. So enjoy that.
Okay, so many stories that could share with you just you just
piqued my interest. Well, I'm glad we got to report
today. I miss you.
I can't believe we're only going to have what two episodes left
after this one for season two, our last episode was Episode, 22
of season 2. The spot to be episode 23 of
season 2. I love it and we love you all
and we will see you next time in Candyland.
Bye.