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Welcome back to another episode of Candyland.
By the time you all hear this episode, our candle collection
is out baby, so tap in. There are a lot of beautiful
scents. We've got Gemini, we've got
Rampage, We got Cult Leader, We have an Evil Eye Candle,
Candyland, and Beyond beyond all of the things.
So tap in and let us know what you think.
Yeah, and every single candle in the collection comes with a
keepsake also. So they're like, super
personalized. And these aren't just like any
candles either. We helped build these candles.
Like we Our friend Brooke owns a candle company called Pitt and
Pendulum. She put together the candles.
This is all her idea. She gets 100% of the proceeds
and all the money from these candles.
But it was super personal. We both smelled all the candles
along the way, figured out what we wanted to change.
It was a really in depth process and everything has like a
meaning behind why we chose what we chose.
Yeah, and it was really fun to do.
I'm really excited because they're all Woodwick and they're
in black blast jars, so you could definitely burn it down
and keep your jar, but they'll come with stickers and goodies.
And I know that Brooke has other things available on her website,
so we will link that in the description.
You're gonna buy those directly from her website.
But tonight we really wanna talk about 'cause we see it a lot.
Like I started something and no one supports me or you're
supporting someone else who does the same thing as me and 1st off
everybody can do the same thing, that you're not going to do it
the same energetically. So quit looking around at other
people and being like well everyone does lashes or everyone
does nails because it does not matter how many people cut hair,
there is another head being born right now that's going to need a
haircut in the future. So don't let that hinder you.
And I think that a lot of people are shocked when they see that
Gemini and myself don't compete. Like if someone wants a book, a
reading with Gemini, and then later books the reading with me
instead. Like we've never had an issue
where it's like, oh, that was my client or whatever.
If you're not energetically blocking your own blessings, the
universe will send you people that want your services.
And we've talked about it before too, where instead of competing
with somebody because you think that they do something better
than you, talk to that person about getting tips and ideas and
what did they do in order to get to where they are and how
they're doing things. A perfect example, our girl
Peach, that that bitch is modeling all the time.
She's doing crazy ass poses. She's always got something
different going, she's always got a different photographer.
And so instead of being like, she's so good at that, fuck her.
I reached out and was like, hey, I'm trying to like network with
local photographers here. I don't know how to do that.
I would like to start setting up my own shoots.
I have ideas, but I don't know how to communicate those.
Can you help me? I traded her taking my
Witchcraft classes for getting tips on modeling for her.
She set up a whole like Pinterest board and like
visualization and stuff you guys are losing out on.
I say you guys, but I just mean people who are in like a
competition mode. You're really losing out on
being able to learn and elevate your own experience and to do
things that you're jealous of somebody else doing or that you
notice somebody else doing because you're more focused on,
I don't know, thinking that you could never be that or that you
already are the shit instead of like having that personal
evolution moment and seeing where you can grow.
Honestly, I feel inspired by people doing the same thing as
me rather than feeling like we're competing, you know?
I think it's really amazing that so many people have started
podcast and I love that for you all.
The one thing I don't love is the people in my inbox.
Like, hey, how do you start a podcast?
Hey, what platform do you use? Because if you've even listened
to 1 fucking Episode of Hours, you would know what platform we
use. And I feel like some people see
what other people are doing and they want to cut in line instead
of doing the work and building, building it from the ground up.
So that's something that I really don't like is the people
who are like, hey, I want to do that.
Now tell me how. No, that's not what Jim And I
was saying, like, you can collaborate with someone and be
like, hey, how can I compensate you as you're compensating me?
How can this be beneficial for both of us rather than, hey, I
want to do what you're doing, tell me how you know.
That's why we both teach classes.
I know Jim and I teaches people how to start a podcast, but it's
like if you're not willing to put that energetic investment
into your dreams, who will? Steve, that's the thing too, is
there are a lot of people who will be like in the inbox well,
I just, I want to do this or I want to do that or, I don't
know. I'm sure you get this too.
I get people who send me these fucking novels about where they
are inside of their spiritual journey and the things that
they're doing and the practice that they're doing.
And then at the end it's like it asks me a question and I'm like,
so you're going to you sat there and you typed out for an hour or
however long it took you to come up with this long ass message
without asking. Like do you have the space and
time for this Are you open to giving me advice?
Hey I'm on this journey right now.
I just need somebody to talk to. Can I reach out?
And it's it's like we've talked about that fine line that you
walk, right? Because like, yes, I want you to
feel comfortable coming to me asking questions and like being
a friend. Absolutely.
But also, you're coming to me asking me questions for free
when I have a advice option and then telling me, well, I can't
compensate you energetically or financially because I'm broker,
I don't have the time. And that's where it's like,
well, now I'm just not going to respond to you, and I'm possibly
going to block you if you keep repeatingly doing it, because
now I'm uncomfortable. I'm a big fan of the Google.
Y'all. Like just go to the Google and
ask it whatever you need to ask it.
Like, I literally Google everything before ever asking
anyone. And I understand that, like
we've talked about this before that like people in other
countries don't have access to certain things or and different
energies may not have access to the resources.
But I personally feel like the Internet is an open book, and
there are so many people talking about the things that you want
to learn about whether you're just on YouTube and you search
cord cutting ritual. There are 100 motherfuckers who
have done a cord cutting ritual from step one to step 100 for
you to enjoy and learn and watch.
My favorite thing is I needed to replace something in my security
system. I Google it, someone done made a
whole video and then in their description they linked all the
parts I needed, They linked the batteries that I needed, the
everything. And I'm just like yes.
So I got all of that fixed and squared away from a 3 minute
YouTube video when I could have like aggressively been upset,
called the helpline of the security system, and instead I
just did it on my own and bought the $15 sensor rather than
fighting with them to get it replaced.
I just think, is my time worth more than $15?
Yes. So I'm just going to buy it,
save myself an hour on the phone, and go make money
instead. But a lot of people don't look
at their time as valuable, so they don't look at other
people's time as valuable. And I always tell myself and I
tell other people this, if you have a skill and you can utilize
that skill to generate more abundance in your life, then you
should delegate the skills that are not your strong suit.
Like we've talked about it before with house cleaning and
you know, things like that. You have so much power in your
hands to create your own reality.
But instead people will whine and complain when if laundry
takes you 8 hours a day and you could drop that off somewhere
and pick it up and it's done, how much could you generate in
that 8 hours if you didn't have to worry about that, if you
didn't have to do whatever it is?
And you could delegate that, like in a perfect world.
And a lot of people look at it energetically as like, oh, I'm
broke, I can't afford that. I can't do that.
And that is your mindset and that's what you're attracting.
And there's so many ways doing things where you're not actually
like having to even financially compensate things.
I've been talking about bartering for the past like, two
weeks on my Facebook. You probably have local trade
groups on your Facebook where you can be like, I make
sourdough bread. Is anybody willing to clean my
house for two loaves of sourdough bread every two weeks?
Like there are so many different ways that you can barter in
order to get abundance and people are so stuck inside the
abundance has to come one way and I don't have money for this.
So, and then what ends up happening is you end up blocking
all of these different ways that abundance is coming to you.
I made a video about this the other day about breaking down
like what you're wanting when you're discussing abundance.
Like what is it that you're actually wanting that money for
that you're sitting here like lighting candles for?
And when you figure out what those individual things are that
you are wanting to manifest that money for, you can actually just
manifest those things instead of the financial part to it because
you're creating additional steps for yourself that aren't
necessary. If you want to make an extra $40
a week because you want to have somebody come and clean your
house, OK, what do you have? Instead of the money that can
get somebody coming in to clean your house, what is it that you
can offer? What can you do outside of
finance? And a lot of it is your
intention. Like this would make my life
easier is what the universe responds to rather than I don't
like this, I don't want to do this.
I'm not good at this. I hate this.
I can't do this. Whatever it is, like those are
the things that keep blocking you because you're putting that
out there and you're attracting it back to you.
And recently, I feel like in the last, like, couple years, a lot
of people have started businesses and a lot of people
have this mindset on the Internet that no one supports
them or that no one invest into their business.
And there's something else that circulates a lot, that a
stranger will become a customer before a friend will.
And that's somewhat true because a lot of your friends don't see
value in you because they see the old version of you.
They see the version of you that they've always known.
You know, the poor, helpless version of you that's in their
head is only a reflection of how they feel about themselves.
So you starting a business and you starting to level up has
them in their feelings and has them triggered by your growth.
And they it is true that I think that you shake loose the like
the rats, you know what I mean? Because over time you and that
person were just making poor choices together.
But then now in your free time, you're building a brand or
building a business or making tik toks.
Like I know so many people who are so funny and have so much
they could say on TikTok and they refuse.
And I know it's deep down because in the beginning of any
journey online, the only people paying attention are people that
know you and they're judging you and they're projecting onto you
their own insecurities, their own fears, their own
self-conscious beliefs. And so many people I know would
be able to break that mold and really branch away and create
their own following, but they won't give it a try.
Like they just refuse to get out of that comfort zone.
And it's because the people around you are much more
comfortable if you're playing small.
That is true, and also just something that you were talking
about with like friends supporting your business.
Somebody made a post on Facebook the other day and it was like, I
hate that I shout out my friends businesses and they don't shout
out my business. And when I read that, I was
like, maybe they're just not interested in the kind of
business that you do. And there's a difference.
The you can't be super selective at the way that you're wanting
people to support you. Somebody can support you as a
person and they can be proud of you.
They can like your posts, whatever, and they can boost you
up that way. Maybe you are super interested
in what they do and you're sharing their stuff on your page
because you have a real appreciation for the business
that they have and what they do. They may not have an interest in
the thing that you do. If you love that they, you know,
do spiritual readings or whatever, and you share that,
awesome. If they are not wanting to share
the mugs that you make and post that on their page, it doesn't
mean they don't support you. There's just not, that's not
what their interest is or what their page is.
And I find that to be so annoying because there's plenty
of times when I'm supporting somebody, but I don't
necessarily like their craft. Like, I love that you're a
singer. I support you being a singer.
Maybe I don't like your music, you know what I mean?
The thing for me is, like a lot of people don't realize that
maybe the service you're offering, they're already loyal
to someone else who has that service.
You know, like I have a lot of friends going through
cosmetology school right now. Just because they're graduating
and getting out of school doesn't mean I'm going to start
getting my hair dyed again or that I'm going to go sit in
their chair. I don't really get my hair done
anymore. So it's like I can still support
you and like your post. But no, I'm not really going to
share it. And I'm not going to be able to
hype it up because I've never embraced or had that service
from you. And I am like a strong and firm
believer. And you should not be leaving
for reviews, for services you have not received because you're
putting your name on the line saying I support this service.
This service worked for me, but if you actually didn't receive
that service, you're endorsing something just 'cause it's your
friend, and we all know that we love our friends.
But watching and cheering someone on from afar and not
actually putting physical abundance into their business is
still supporting like the people who like and share my post or
just comment or even just put an emoji on a freaking picture that
is helping me in any way, shape and form.
It doesn't mean that they went to my website and booked a
service. I have a lot of people that go
to my website and they're like, I wish I could book a service.
I'm going to save my money for it.
And then there's the other end of the spectrum of the people
that are like, hey, do you ever run cells?
And I don't take that as like they're discrediting what my
service is. I mean, even Ulta and Sephora
have sales. And I tell them yes, sometimes I
do. I don't do Black Friday or Cyber
Monday because there's other avenues that are trying to get
your money. I do a sale on a regular Tuesday
in the middle of April because I want to, not because there's
some underlying energetic force that's making me want to.
You know, I don't do things for money.
I do things that I feel called to do.
And so, you know, there's a big difference between supporting
someone and trying to hold them back.
And someone liking or sharing your post is not that fine line
in my opinion. I feel like you have to be aware
that you have to attract your ideal client and not project
fear onto them. Yeah, but I I think that so many
people operate from a fear based stance.
Like they don't necessarily make changes in life unless they are
scared. And so now they need to do it.
Or they feel a lack like they're, you know, you don't
work on, you know, elevating your relationship all the time
until all of a sudden shit's bad.
And then you have to work on it instead of like putting in
energy so that you're able to get back on track.
It's the same thing to me with, like friendships.
People won't be your fucking friend.
And then all of us, you know, they won't reach out whatever
until all of a sudden you're like, listen, I don't fuck with
this. Like I don't feel like I'm a
priority or you even want to like keep this friendship going.
And so, like, I'm going to take a step back and then it's, oh,
well, let me throw myself into that.
And a lot of people are like in or out.
I type of people, I think. I feel like I have grown so much
that like my friendship does not come with like a certain
standard except that you have to respect me.
I need to be able to trust you and I need to know that your
intentions are pure. But that doesn't mean that,
like, I have some role on communication or I texted you on
Tuesday and you didn't reply till Friday.
Like a lot of people are like, they're not answering, but
they're on your phone and or they're on their phone.
OK, cool. Like, just 'cause I'm on my
phone doesn't mean you're entitled to a response at this
moment. I'm not energetically in the
space where I want to reply at this moment.
And I think that a lot of people's friendships, they're
kind of treated like a consolation prize.
Like, oh, whenever you're having fun, you have a certain amount
of friends. When you're sad, you got a
certain amount of friends. When you're in between.
I know a lot of people battle depression and when they are
sad, they push everyone away. And then you taking that
personal only makes it worse for them because now not only did
they already feel like shit about unrelated things, you're
taking it personal, you're taking their distance personal.
And I'm talking in like platonic friendships.
Obviously in a romantic relationship, the boundaries and
the rules are different. There are more needs for
consistent communication for me. Friendship.
You want to be platonic and we're cool.
Homies, whatever. We're good.
But if you even think you're pursuing me romantically, I want
to talk to you every day. Or why are we pursuing each
other romantically? Doesn't make sense.
But another thing I want to say about the small business thing
is everyone is trying to turn their personal hobby into a
small business, and that's where y'all are fucking up.
A hobby is something you do for fun, and you may make money on
it in the future. A business is something that
you're willing to do for absolute free.
You would put your last dollar on the line, your blood, sweat
and tears on the line for this business.
If you're not at that level, you're not necessarily a small
business in my opinion. It's a small hobby that could
grow and you may be making money or generating income from that
hobby. But not everyone who got like a
cricket should be starting a business, stealing designs and
putting them on Etsy cause y'all are stealing those designs.
Like, I am always baffled by the amount of stolen designs from
the Disney series that you all use and put on Etsy.
You could literally be sued at any given point by Disney and I
just feel like people need to keep hobbies, hobbies, things
you're making for friends and family.
Maybe selling at a local farmers market or flea market.
But not everything needs to be an online entourage unless you
are truly ready for the consequences of taking other
people's designs. That's my biggest pet peeve with
the small business like Rush is the people who are very
unoriginal in their doings and kind of like trying to
manipulate the system and then complaining on the Internet that
no one supports them. It makes it frustrating for the
people who are like putting a lot of like time and energy into
things and having things be authentic is like you're just
going to like take the shortcut route around and you're going to
do it that way. I totally agree with that.
I I support everybody having their hustle when you're going
to have your hustle. But I think that legitimately
those who have small, those who have businesses in general,
there's so much that's done behind the scenes that we don't
make any profit on like we've taught you and I have talked
before about the hours that it takes for us to set things up.
You know that if you even just going into a reading, the years
that it takes for studying and doing things and learning things
and working on yourself and growth and whatever.
And so it does make it like not a comparison to people around
you, but it does make it frustrating if somebody's like,
oh, I just started reading Tarot last month and I'm charging, you
know, $300.00 a reading or whatever.
It's almost like a can you pay your dues kind of moment and and
that's in every career field. You have that with people who
are like doing roofing and construction and they're like
you're just going to watch a YouTube video and then walk out
here and like you're going to give clients bad experiences.
So then we have to go back and like redo the work.
And there have been plenty of times when somebody comes to me
and they're scared when we step into a session because they met
Joe Schmo who gave them a reading and said, you know,
you're cursed and the devil is coming and and knocking at your
door and you know all this shit. And it's because somebody's not
educated on something and then they're going out and doing
things and it's like the same thing if you are, you know,
custom making something for somebody and they get it and
it's just like a regurgitated, like, wish version of something.
And it's, yeah, I find it annoying.
And then we have to like, have that balance of, well, I want to
support you because you're doing a small business, but I also
think that you're ethically and morally doing something I don't
agree with. And so like what's the line that
I tote? Yeah, and this is kind of like
my public service announcement and on my feelings about that,
like if you're making designs and you're drawing those up on
procreate and you're popping your shit, do your thing.
I've seen a lot of tattoo artists post their work and then
people steal it and don't give them credit.
And then I've been told by other artists, like, they're cool with
you tattooing their design, but they want you to give credit
where credit's due. They don't care that you use
their design, but don't post that to your gram, get 5000
likes and act like you drew it. You know, like that's where I
think a lot of people lack originality and they lack the
unique ideas that it takes to thrive in the business world.
Even the people coming straight out of college and doing
marketing for a big firm, like, they're like standing on
business. They're bringing their ideas and
someone else is putting the muscle and the money behind it.
But that's their idea. And it's like, one of my things
I've heard that the Spotify wrapped was created by an intern
that was working for Spotify, and they didn't pay her for it.
She was an intern. She gave them the idea, they
pitched it, it went next level, and now Spotify wrapped is
something that that's the only reason I switched to Spotify.
It's because I wanted to this past year.
So you know, you got to think like are you pouring into the
right places or are you giving really great ideas away for
other people to take? And I think that's where like
the creative artistry aspect of things are starting to be lost,
especially with AI and just copy and paste, copy and paste, even
Sheen, you know, stealing designers ideas.
I know there was an uproar. A local girl in Kentucky makes
these wood burned ornaments and some someone took her Taylor
Swift 1, replicated it and started selling it through
Walmart's website because Walmart has like a third party
system for their website. Like it's not Walmart but
Walmart's making money and it's opening you up like Amazon to a
mass audience. They literally stole a local
girl's design because it was on the Internet.
And that's where I think so many people are in a creative rut,
because they're on the fine line of oversharing and not wanting
to share it all. See.
And you have to be careful, like the rooms that you're putting
yourself in and the environments that you're putting yourself in.
If you have all of these amazing ideas and you're working for
Spotify and you're pitching things, and then Spotify is
taking that, but you didn't get financially compensated.
Spotify has people like you who joined Spotify because they want
the wrapped and they see other people doing it and think it's
fucking cool. That girl should have made
fucking bank for her idea. And there are people all the
time who are contributing more to their day-to-day jobs than
they're getting out of it. And other people are profiting,
profiting off of their shit. And those are the people, the
people who are constantly giving creative ideas and influence and
stuff. Those are the people that I
wanna see doing like consulting, doing their own business where
they're using their creative vision for things.
And it's like you have people who have no originality and
creativity but all the audacity. And then you have people who
have all the creativity and and all this and all these gifts,
but they don't have the self-confidence or
self-awareness to realize how fucking magical they are and how
much they could do. And when you're, especially if
you're somebody who is a very creative person, but you put
yourself inside of groups of people who don't believe in like
you manifesting things and and you creating your own reality
and don't appreciate the creativity that you have, you
always feel like you're ordinary and that's because you're having
people around you who don't recognize how to be more than
that. Yeah.
And that's why it's so important that as you're growing that you
allow yourself to outgrow people.
I do not care how long you have known someone.
They could be part of your problem.
They could be part of your lack of confidence.
Because there's a lot of women that I used to hang out with
that would never tell me how great or how amazing I was.
And then I meet friends that I have now and they're always
hyping me up, telling me like, you deserve better than that, or
you don't deserve someone who's bringing you down or holding you
back or whatever. But you know, I think some
people feel better about themselves if you're not living
up to your potential. And that's why I know a lot of
like artists and musicians always talk about like the
moving away from your hometown is the most important part.
And I know VI Peach has moved several times and now that she's
in Florida, her career is popping, She's getting paid
gigs, She's working with really amazing engineers and and beat
makers. And it's like a lot of people
are so ruffled by your success or the perception that they have
of your success that they would never reach a hand down and try
to help you. And that's why, like, we love to
see other women growing and elevating and supporting that
from a distance, because competitions at the bottom and
collaborations at the top. And that's the facts.
I think a lot of people don't know how to collaborate.
I'll say a lot of women, a lot of women don't know how to
collaborate because a lot of women are girls.
Girls, Until it comes down to somebody doing the same thing as
you do or you feeling inferior in any way and people will not
realize that they're having a projection and will just, well,
she thinks she's all that and move away.
No, you think she's all that and you're upset because she's
glowing and you don't know how yet.
And instead of you sitting there and again learning a thing or
two and working on your own self and letting your light shine,
you're uncomfortable and so you're going to try and tear her
down and then blame it on her own self-confidence.
Yeah, there's a lot of that conversation on the Internet
about, like, I'm not watering myself down anymore to fit your
narrative. And I think that over the years,
I look back and I can see areas that I had watered myself down
to try to make other people more comfortable.
And there's still times that I won't talk about certain success
and certain things that are happening behind the scenes,
because I don't really know who I can trust with that
information a lot of the time. And I don't know if they're just
learning things about me to use them against me later or if
they're genuinely interested. So I love the conversation of,
like, I'm trying to get to know you.
But then again, I'm like, I ain't telling you shit.
Like you're going to have to observe, you're going to have to
put in energy and you're going to have to take your time.
Because I have totally been in relationships where I have told
them what I wanted and then they tried to become that.
And then once the veil was lifted, I'm like trauma bonded
with a person that really isn't the person they led me to
believe they were. And that's why I think being
tapped in and having my intuition so strong has really
limited me in the dating scene. Cause a lot of y'all are being
lied to, and a lot of Y'all's partners and even yourself,
you're trying to show them this elevated version of you that
that isn't you really like, that's not who you really are or
that's not who they really are. And then you're intertwined and
you're trying to make it fit. But it'll be the last time that
I look at potential and try to put someone in that place.
Because potential is for everyone.
Everyone has potential, but are you going to be consistent and
put in the work to get there? Whether it's in a business or
relationship, a career does not matter.
Even if it's just a personal growth in the gym or taking care
of your body and your home. Are you going to put in the
word? Because it sounds good, sounds
pretty, sounds fancy. Like, you can make the words
sound however you want them to sound, but if you're not putting
in that word when no one's looking, you're not going to get
anywhere at all. Yeah, and and putting that in
when nobody's looking. Doing things behind the scenes.
And I think that this is what you were talking about too, when
you were shit. You were talking earlier about
your, your small business being something that you would be
doing for absolutely free regardless.
And that's the putting the energy in behind the scenes that
maybe nobody's going to see. But you feel such a passion
about doing something or such a calling about doing it, that
even if this never sees the light of day, I'm going to be
doing this because this is what my soul feels drawn to.
I think that so many people and don't realize that the call that
they feel towards doing something different and being
something bigger isn't just a depression.
And I think that that, like, drive to be doing something
different, feeling like you're unhappy with where your life is
right now. When you want to be growing and
you want to be evolving, that is an overwhelming feeling.
If you feel like I'm not doing enough, there's something else
that I need to be doing. And you have to actually put an
effort to try and fail and try and fail and figure out what
that thing is that's going to make that calling or what not to
you die down. As opposed to being like, well,
this is just depression and I need to go on medication because
I can't make this inner voice stop telling me that I'm not
doing enough. And that's not to discredit and
say that like mental health isn't a real fucking thing and
that there's not depressive episodes.
But there also is situational depression I don't think people
talk about. And that very much can tie into
you not living up to your full potential and you dragging your
feet through things and accepting the bare minimum and
then wondering why things aren't better.
If you're in situations where it you're accepting the bare
minimum of things and you think that you can't do something to
change it, you're wrong. And something that I have found,
and I even texted you about this recently, something that I find
a lot of comfort in lately, is that it's literally within my
hands to make any choice and change my entire reality.
I could get up any moment from the life that I'm living right
now and I could decide, you know what, I'm going to move to
Texas. Maybe I'm not going to have
money in Texas. Maybe I don't know anybody in
Texas that I'll have shit going on.
But, but I do have it within my means to just pick up and go and
do whatever it is that I want to do.
And once you realize that you're not actually trapped inside of
your reality, you're just making the choice to not evolve and do
anything and grow from that. That's when I think doors open
up for you to start really shifting things and doing what
you want to do without fear. Exactly.
And I feel like one of the most important ways to really put
that strength and determination into your reality is to take
better care of your mind, body, and spirit.
Like your career, your job, whatever these things out of
your control, they're a reflection of your own energy.
And if you're only getting the bare minimum from your job or
you're struggling, it does not matter.
Every time something goes up, I just make more money.
It's like, OK, it went up, but I made more, so it's like you
could do that too. I just believe that's my
reality. I believe that every time I have
to have something expensive or something happens, like I'm just
going to make more to replace it.
Or every time I do this, I'm just going to level up.
I think that most important thing is dedicating your time to
yourself. Like whether that's working out,
meditating, yoga, stretching, even just very small steps of,
like, watching what you eat, cutting out alcohol, cutting out
extracurricular activities and drugs that you don't really
need. You know, that's the
conversation people don't want to have.
They're they're depressed on the Internet, but as soon as Friday
hits, they're getting drunk, they're at the bar.
Then on Sunday night, they're mad at the world.
They're mad at everybody. They're on Facebook saying all
this shit because you need to do laundry.
You needed to wash your sheets, you needed to wash your ass.
But he was at the bar every day. He was at the bar every day.
And that's where I look back at the old version of myself, and I
can rightfully say that was my problem.
My problem was I utilize my free time to hang out with people who
really didn't give a fuck about me or themselves.
And they were not trying to help me elevate.
They were not trying to encourage me to get sober, to do
better for myself. They wanted me right there
outside, smoking cigs and doing dumb shit with them.
You know what I mean? Like when people say, oh, I'm a
social smoker. No, you just hang out with
people and they influence you to do bad things.
Bad decisions are made when you're in groups of people who
are limited, and that's why the company you keep, the people you
have sex with, the people that you let in your home, the people
that you're around matter. So you know, now on Monday
you're in a bad mood because you really needed to wash your
sheets and do your laundry, but now you had to get clothes out
of the hamper and wear them to work because you didn't have
anything clean. And that's on you because you
were out all night, every night, doing whatever or even just at
the bar or wherever spending money you don't have.
So now on Monday, you're in the negatives, or now rents to and
you're on Facebook asking for money.
It's like, grow up, look at yourself in the mirror and be
like, wow, I'm the fucking problem.
I need to check this. I need to check myself.
And a lot of it is that little demon on your shoulder, because
when you drink and you do drugs, you open yourself up to lower
vibrational energies. Instead, when you're clear
minded and in harmony and peace, you're connecting to higher
energies who are going to help you elevate because you're
willing to make a sacrifice and put in that work.
But that's a whole other conversation.
Sometimes I think that people don't recognize when they're
needing to put in the work, like like they are doing something
and so well, I'm putting some type of energy into it.
So shouldn't this be enough? And the difference is putting
effort and energy into something because you are trying to
acquire a specific outcome as opposed to you just putting that
energy and work into it because that's what needs to be done.
It's like doing things that you're supposed to do because
you want to treat at the end as opposed to you doing the things
that you're supposed to do just so that you can get them done.
And society is such like an instant gratification type of
thing. Like I put in, you know, this
hour. And so I'm wanting this, if you
want an instant gratification for something, keep working for
somebody else. That way you you know exactly
what to expect and you're going to be able to get that thing.
Surround yourself with yes people, because they will always
tell you you're doing a wonderful job.
You will get instant gratification from them anytime
that you are doing something, they will just tell you that,
that nobody could have done it better than you did it.
You can. Continue to put yourself inside
of situations and not elevate and then listen and be like, oh,
that what they're saying makes total sense, but then you forget
all about what we said. And then next week it's the same
cycle. And then you love it.
And there are people who listen to you and I who check in with
both of us and are like, I took this out of this episode, this
time applying it to my life. And we, like, see them actually
doing those things. And then there are people who
listen to the episode and they message us and they tell us all
the reasons why they can't take any of the advice that's been
given in the episode and why it just wouldn't work for them.
And, you know, change the way that you say that or what not,
because that's not going to work for everybody.
We'll never change what we're saying because it doesn't work
for you. I just feel like from personal
experience this is how I've gotten from low bottom,
depression, sickness, all these things to an elevated version
where I can help people. And and I'm not saying it as
like a mean way, but it is some tough love in there.
Like check your shit. Like the only real growth that
will ever happen is when you are tired of making excuses.
When you are finally done wasting your breath with these
people in these places and you are ready to bloom and outgrow
them. You were like, well how can I
bloom? Everything's a mess because you
need to root yourself and you need a bloom wherever you are
planted right now. Because although you may want
that five bedroom house with A4 car, garage and all these
things, you need to focus on what you have.
And if you have a roof over your head right now, then you have a
lot more than most people. So instead of thinking about all
the shit you don't have and all the ways it's going to take you
10/15/20 years to get there, why don't we look at every single
day as the blessing that it is and just try with what we have.
And that is what everyone that I work with personally, that I
mentor, that I'm around, like that's what we're doing.
It's not that I have it all figured out, it's that when
something arrives, I see it as a challenge rather than an
obstacle. Like, you can look at it both
ways, The roads closed, but are you going to keep going or are
you just going to sit there and be like, no, the roads closed.
That's where. If everyone was on this path, it
would be easy. It's the road less travelled for
a reason. You can't be looking around
asking all these people in your life for directions because
they're benefiting from your lack of awareness, they're
benefiting from your lack of confidence.
I can literally at least think of five different clients that I
have mentored over the years that have straight left their
partner at the end of it, because they realize that their
partner is keeping them down, Their partner is manipulating
them. The person they're with is
gaslighting them, making them feel, not confident, not heard,
and not seen. So the moment they start
listening to themselves and start seeing themselves, they
see the veil's been lifted. This is an illusion.
This person is manipulating me. This person is keeping me under
their spell for their benefit. Not because they love me, not
because they care about me. Because they're comfortable in
abusing me. They're comfortable to
manipulate me. Their comfort zone is that I'm
OK with all of this. So therefore I've been choosing
this. So instead of being mad at their
partner and projecting that onto their partner, they're like, you
know what, we're good here. I've learned my lesson.
I'm going to move on. And then that's normally when
the partner wants to change or wants to do these things, but
it's like you have to be ready for what you're asking for.
I always tell people, if literally the most perfect
opportunity knocked on your door tomorrow and they're like, OK,
you've got to move to Nebraska, you would have 10,000 excuses of
why you can't move to Nebraska for this $200,000 a year job.
You would be, oh, my family's here, my kid goes to school
here. I'm under a lease.
Instead, the person who's the go getter is going to be on there,
finding the schools in the area, asking someone to take over
their lease, cutting their lease, selling everything they
own so they can pack lightly and fucking moving.
But that goes into the You're asking for abundance.
And what is it that you're actually asking for?
And what are you willing to do for that?
Because you could have lit yourself a little money candle
yesterday, and now you have this opportunity reaching out to you.
But I don't want to move to Nebraska, so I'm not going well.
It's not that the magic is not working and that the
opportunities aren't there. It's that you're the you're the
catalyst who's going to be able to drive that thing into
fruition. Or block it completely or.
Block it. And like my other favorite thing
is like, people are like, I wish I could model like you, but my
boyfriend won't let me or I don't have the money or, you
know, like they have excuses. And it's like literally that
energy is the reason that you're not doing those things.
Because there's someone out there with a camera that would
be willing to take pictures of you if you were confident in
yourself. If you put yourself out there in
a way that was exuding confidence and acceptance and
elevation, people would be attracted to you.
So if something is feeling blocked in your life, really
look at how you're proceeding that because it definitely
starts within. If you don't believe you deserve
it, the universe will not serve it.
You will get looked over every time.
And then you can claim and really reaffirm that belief
system that you're not good enough, that no one sees you,
that you're not, you're not pretty enough, you're not skinny
enough, Whatever it is, people tell themselves, it's like
you're now creating those systems, you're creating those
energetic contracts. So now that's what you're
getting, that is what you are attracting.
Facts. We just want to see all of you
all be the best version of yourself.
We want you all to know that you are capable of breaking these
cycles, capable of letting shit go and being the best version of
yourself. But it literally starts with
self accountable accountability and realization.
Just realize where things are blocked and learn to take
accountability for how you play a role in your own suffering.
Do you want to pull a human design card?
Yeah. Where's my human design deck?
Oh, yes, hang on. We were doing a raffle on
Facebook and it has went all the way out and it's crazy.
I forgot that I had packed up my cards because I went and I did a
reading for a local girl in exchange for getting my nails
done. So I was looking around and I
was like, where the fuck are my cards?
She already sold all 20 spots. Yep, some people.
Want them? I'm going to be doing a I'm
going to do a witchcraft box raffle, I think, and put one of
those candles in it, too. All right.
Oh, we have the curator card number 12.
Like a chandelier, the sign is Gemini.
Your gift is discrimination, and your shadow is vanity moving
through vanity. A mild obsession for self above
all allows you to apply that love to the world around you.
Here, you are a great discriminator.
You are able to be the best judge of who and what makes you
feel good and then you curate appropriately.
This visceral love extends to life itself and you're able to
cherish the beautiful gift of each passing day.
There is an artistic element often centered on all things
music, language, dance and expression.
You are moved by feelings and emotions.
Let them carry you. You value authenticity and ride.
The higher frequency raves waves when you take hold of this
precious gift and use it wisely. This may be somewhat surprising
to you, as vanity is seen as a dirty word, but you may not
associate with it at all. The trick with this shadow is
how elusive and sneaky it is. If you try to rid of it, you're
sure to develop even more. Vanity comes from the love of
the self, your individuality, your uniqueness, yourself,
growth and spiritual nature. To focus on yourself, especially
against the backdrop of other people, may keep you isolated
and vision and ego trip for your higher self.
With that being said, don't get too lost in the shadowy vortex.
Your gift awaits you always. Your themes are love, emotion,
art and expression. I love it, and I just think
everyone has so many creative abilities that we keep tucked
away out of fear of judgement and we want you all to shine
your light for other people to follow.
You may not think people are listening, you may not think
they care, but you are inspiring people who will never tell you
that you're inspiring them. Trust me.
Happens every day, baby. Happens every day.
So hopefully you all got a lot out of this episode.
Tap in. Our candle collection is out
now, so go to the description box, go order some candles from
our girl Brooke and support a small business and we will see
you all next time in Candyland. Bye, bye.