A woman that actually loves you and cares about you will not
behave like she's behaving A married man committing suicide
because of side chick. What are you talking about?
You are also the one taking care of this married man that
promised to even like help you and take care of it.
Now giving my money to white has become a that he's the one
giving you what's meet him that meet him twice a week.
That's why it's a week is for what's having sex with you.
That's why it's a week is for what's you giving your body to
him for your money back? What is it for?
I have plans for her. I have plans for her.
Guys, let me tell you, and this man can lie.
God, you have plans for who? By the end of this episode, you
will learn a few things about mental health.
You know, we're in the Mental Health Awareness Month and in
collaboration with Vena Water, we're going to talk a few things
about mental health. I asked you guys to send me some
questions and I'm going to get an expect to answer.
Well, I technically did not get an expect, but I got a nurse.
I have a friend that's the nurse and I will call her on phone and
then she will be part of the conversation answering your
questions for you. And so let's get into that
before we get into the stories we have for this episode.
But whilst you're listening, know that Vena Drinking Water
said let's do this for you. We'll be right back.
Welcome back, guys. I have my friend Andy 1st and
mom is a makeup artist and Ness. And because she's a Ness, my
assumption is that she has a little bit of an idea on what
mental health is about. She's needing it as she didn't
like to turn you. Yeah.
So let's have a conversation with her and then let's move
through this to get that baby girl.
How are you doing, baby? I'm good, I'm good.
OK, so we're going to get through some questions that some
followers sent about mental health.
What do you want to know about mental health?
And since we're in the Mental Health Awareness Month, let's
get through this together. The very first question I have
for you is this. What are some of the mental
health red flags we should never ignore?
Oh, some of the mental health reflects you shouldn't ignore.
Yes, one when you always feel burnt out and you're always like
you don't want to get in touch with family friend, you know,
you just want to be in your corner.
It's not healthy. OK, Well, sometimes you have to
also like take your time away from people.
But when it stops becoming consistent, you need to talk to
someone. Another thing, another thing is
when you feel like always being on social media, like stay in
bed, scroll through your phone for hours.
It's not healthy if especially when you're when you personally
have some sort of some sort of anxiety problem or panic attack.
Most of the time when you stay on social media for a long time,
sometimes it triggers some past event, it triggers something.
So it's better to stay off social media when that happens.
So staying on social media for a long time, it's another red
flag. Like there is actually one of
the red flags. OK, another red flag is you
crying for no reason. I know it sounds normal.
It sounds like, oh, it's normal. No, it's not OK.
It's not. You sit in there and you you be
sitting there and something comes in mind and you start
crying, waiting for no God damn reason.
It's no problem. Oh, there are a lot of red flags
you shouldn't, you shouldn't ignore.
Or. So for now, that's what that's.
For the red flags, OK, now let's move on to the next question.
Someone said it's on Friday. It's like a scenario, the person
said. I've been feeling really
overwhelmed lately, but I'm not sure if it's just stress or
something deeper. How do I know when it's time to
seek professional help? OK, how would you know when it
gets your points where you want to get?
OK relies on everything you want to give up.
You've tried everything. It's not working, you think it's
not working and you feel like that's when you have to seek
professional help to give me. OK, when you at rock bottom,
right? Yes.
OK, how do you know when you're in rock bottom?
When you feel like a rock bottom?
Apart from suicidal thoughts, what's what's the rock bottom
red flag? What's what?
What's the fish? Can you find yourself in?
I feel like this is me in rock bottom.
Oh, you stopped taking care of yourself?
You really don't care? What like.
What happens? You like what happened because
you know you are like, excuse me to say fuck it like.
OK. Yeah, that's also another formal
form of rock bottom. OK, but that time you don't have
to necessarily speak to no attracted.
No, sometimes you have to take a breath and just go out.
What are, you know, speak to friends.
If you don't have friends, family, you know, sometimes a
stranger, a random, they can't even help.
So yeah. So now let's talk about the
family part, because for the stranger thing, I get it,
because sometimes you go somewhere, you meet somebody and
you're talking to the person easily.
But for the family part, you know when you encounter a family
member and the moment you start talking to them about how you're
tired, you're exhausted, things are not working out, you know
you want to end it and they start telling you to trade.
What's David that's discouraging?
You exactly. That you're lazy.
You are just your dad. That's why I gave a lot of
examples, like family, some families, some family members
really help with, like talking to you about your crisis.
Yeah. And if you don't want to speak
to a family can fit a neutral person like a stranger or a
selfish if you want to. But it all depends on you and
personally you're comfortable and sharing your your emotions
and you're comfortable, OK. All right, so let's move on to
maybe two more questions and we're going to end this
particular part. This was this.
What are some small daily habits that actually help improve
mental health over time? Oh, OK, learn it, learn the
skill, OK, you know, learn the skill.
Incorporating new hobbies like swimming or people like those
tennis, you know, try to incorporate a lot of activities,
yes, activity, incorporating new activities into your your daily
routine. You have to go for long walk,
probably on the beach and the road guides, you know.
And another thing, listening to Southern mode uplifting music,
you know it, it helped a lot. The music part, it helped a lot.
You can't go sit at the beach or in a garden or in the proper
just outside your house. I mean, for the music, your news
flash, I, I don't want somebody being a heartbroken situation.
And because we are saying, well, listen to music, you will listen
to heartbreak music, and then you come and see that few of you
said listen to music when you're getting depressed.
And. As you are talking to maybe the
music has take you to somewhere you don't want to be.
So please don't. Well, listen to Laura.
Spend somewhere you are in a bad or depressive state.
Nobody, nobody listen to sad, sad songs.
They say that because we said it's better, healthy, and you
need to listen to music. A list.
No, please don't listen to me. Yeah, I learn my lesson.
That would be more helpful. That's always specific with the
mood that let's say kind of music, yeah, music that can be
accept your mood like with absolute most also beat song
actually let that mood and yeah, so another thing lower your the
time you spend on social. This.
Yes, no other time she spent on social.
When you add that to your daily routine, it will really help you
a lot because people easily get triggered when they see random
stuff on TV, on social media. And another thing, read child's
speed. It broadens up your mind.
It makes you it helps you learn a lot about your condition, not
just your condition like and it helps you be self aware.
OK, at their point, like you read about whatever you feel
like you're strong especially and sometimes nobles fun books.
Yeah, it helps you relax too. OK, so finally this question is
basically, I think a lot of people also ask this is burnout
the same as depression? And then quote UN quote, I'm
exhausted all the time, but I don't know if I'm just tired or
if it's something more. So people just want to probably
or this person wants to know the difference between depression
and tiredness. Tiredness is a symptom OK
Tiredness is a a symptom and depression is as whole topic on
its own is that. So tiredness is a symptom of
depression or is like there's? One symptom of depression like
when you are depressed, it's like you are you want to how do
I ask you to detach every like. Detach yourself from people.
Be on your own. Yeah, be on your own, be on.
And the worst part of because when you can't walk back in this
way, you want to like give up on life, commit, fight.
You have this decide out or you feel you feel like everything is
not working out for you. Yeah, but there's this thing
that I've heard that sometimes the most depressed people are
the most happiest. Is it that they are happy in
public or their happiness in public should be as a a a
trigger or a way for somebody to know that oldest person is
depressed? Oh, it's a cover.
OK. It's a cover like they they,
they find it difficult to let people know what they are going.
Through OK. I don't know how, but they find
it difficult to let people know what they are going through and
this person when the when this person get someone who he can he
or she can actually talk to the let on the let it out out.
And when that person disappoints or ends up not being dead for
getting more hair, that's when it comes right back, when they,
they'll be OK, but they find it difficult to let it out.
Yeah. Yeah.
And they, they do, you know, the people who are depressed, they
help like others who are also depressed because.
Yes. Do you understand where?
That was that was I was saying that, that was I was saying that
they said the most depressed people are the most happiest
people. Yeah, they are the most happiest
people. They they, they can be good for
you because they are trying to tell you that this is what I
also want. OK, I'm not definite.
I'm not definite. OK.
That's another perspective. Interesting.
Yeah. And honestly they they ensure
you find fine that they are not OK.
But we are too blind to their happiness to see what is
actually going on. Yeah.
OK, they'll show you a lot of time.
They'll show you a lot of time. Yeah, they sometimes they are
absence minded. They are, you know, too happy
for your life here. Like yes, yes.
And especially they are when you guys meet and you're drinking on
a normal day, this person won't drink a lot.
But at that particular moment, the person is, you know,
drinking a lot, laughing, trying to get into those people.
They need your help. They need 3.
Everyone else is fine. That's really, that's sweet.
That's sweet. OK.
Thank you very much, every girl for doing this with me.
Verna says thank you whenever you pass by the house.
Please, you know you have a bunch of Verna good is here for
you. Oh, I'm.
Tommy. OK, alright, have a good time.
I'm thinking of the call. Alright, sure.
Bye. Bye.
OK guys, so I hope you enjoyed this particular segment of the
POVI. Enjoyed it too.
I think I've learnt a lot when it comes to mental health and I
hope you have learnt something too.
So let's look at 10. When we come back, we will go
through some of the stories we have in our archives.
We'll be right back. OK, so now we're going to go
through the stories that we have for this episode.
If they posted it on social media, if they posted it on
social media, if they posted it on social media, then they made
it our business. And since they made it our
business, we're gonna make it our business.
Yeah, I know they look at stage a little, yeah, that's because I
have glasses on. I'm trying to block some of the
lights out, yes. And so let's go straight into
the stories and that we have the very first one, so.
That's that's love it. That's love it.
Good evening woman of cold. I met this lady on TikTok.
I followed her for over a year but I wasn't desperate in terms
of appearing on her live broadcast and also I don't
always like her post. But one day I decided to ask for
her contacts and she gave me a Facebook name and we had a chat.
She was bossy and rude from beginning but before our
conversation ended she said the reason she can't fall in love is
because she doesn't want to be a bedding on a man.
She has to pay her rent and when she's stable she can now date.
So I left our conversations pending without talking to her
for over a week because I had to travel to Lagos, Nigeria for
some business meetings. I got back and reached out to
her. She was like if I don't want
help her then fine. I was like I deeply love you so
I will support you. Kindly give me some time to
raise the cash. She came telling me she has paid
half of the rent so I should support her.
I did send her the cash to settle the landlord because the
pressure on her was too much. Purely with all this, I haven't
met her before. It was chatting and phone calls.
She was eager to meet me, but I was very busy.
I finally got a time and we met at the new rented apartment.
We have a very short and beautiful conversation.
From there I started visiting her during weekends.
Something happened whichever I don't understand and it keeps me
thinking and worried. She decided to start a business
which is she told Black Pepper business so she gave it a name
like sexy Ubola Shiton. So I decided to surprise her.
So I spoke to my designer to design some beautiful flyer for
her which I gave her a name according to her English name
she's beveling. So in short I customized the
designed as the gold African shiton thinking she will love
and appreciate the surprise. She never spoke a word about my
surprise which I got for him. As this goes by we had a video
call and I raised the topic of the design which I did for her.
She was like her friends are choppy lady so she prefers to
maintain the sexual blue. I was like listen to me for
once. She got upset and said to me we
will talk later and maybe goodnight and then she dropped
the call. It was very disrespectful to me
for hanging up the call on me. Then few after she hung up the
video call on me. She called me twice but I didn't
answer her call because I was really upset with her
disrespectfulness. 3 days later I tried to reach out to her but
she didn't answer my call and text.
So I decided to give a surprise visit at her residence.
I got some wine, chocolate and some cake and took it along with
me. When I got to her doorstep, I
met her kid brother and explained everything to her.
Lo and beholder brother said she's not even talking to him.
Then I knocked on her door and entered into her room.
She was on a call talking to another guy.
She was surprised to see me. She started acting bossing.
She then told the guy on the phone that she will call back
and the guy was like Are you sure you're going to call back?
She said yes. She sat down and gave me her
listening. Yeah she was like if I'm here to
talk about her or blue. She told them I can leave her
house. Why would I come to her house
without informing her? I was like what was my mistake?
The mistake was that she called me and I didn't answer her call.
That was all. She hasn't blocked but I decided
to unfollow her on Tiktok only and let her and left her
messenger and WhatsApp. My question is, is it wrong to
surprise a woman or give her an advice on an idea that about her
future? I actually bought the wine,
chocolate and cake as a gift to her in all that to see sorry and
probably talk things over but she wasn't ready for us to talk
things over calmly. She was being rude to me
thinking when I get there things would be smooth.
I left her with anger. I dropped a gift I bought for
her on her bed and left just after I left within 10 minutes
and she started streaming on live on TikTok.
Thank you man of gold POV for your time and attention.
I appreciate you. OK so this is what I basically
think of it. I basically think that somebody
that appreciate you and appreciate the things that
you've done for her will basically let me take off the
glasses. It's weird, yes.
I, I basically feel like somebody that appreciates you
and appreciates the things that you do for her will not think
about you coming there on knowingly first, but also think
about what you call it, why you want to come there to sort out
what had happened, to have a proper conversation about what
had gone on. I think I was talking to a
friend about something and then she was like.
It is not about even just having a conversation, cause to her she
feels like having a conversation.
It's just telling the person and moving on, but rather talking.
It's out to the person one-on-one, letting each other
know what you guys are thinking about the whole situation and
then come up with a, you know, solution together.
Right? And that would be more helpful
than anything. But then I also think that a
woman that actually loves you and cares about you will not
behave like she's behaving. She doesn't.
OK, She's probably just there for the things that she's going
to get from you. And from the look of things, it
feels like she was moving on. Like, yeah, Anyway, that's what
I think. Let's let the comment section
also see what they think about it.
So we move on to the next story. Don't I look like the lady from
scooby-doo? I keep forgetting her name.
My sister keeps telling me, but I keep forgetting her name.
That's. Why I love you.
POV Sorry I had to come into your DM this late.
I sent you a message two months ago telling you about my
confusion status on my decision to choose a well to do married
man and a single man. I decided to let's go the
married man to build a new relationship with a single man.
The married man has been begging me since to take him back, but I
was busy trying to make mine work.
For about two weeks now, close friends have been calling me.
He looked worried and troubled. I received a call last Sunday
that he has committed suicide. I feel guilty.
I think when you came to me about this issue, I told you
explicitly to let go of the married man, forget about him
and focus on building something for yourself and for your
future. I still stand by that.
I don't think you did anything wrong by leaving the married
man. A married man committing suicide
because of side chick are you talking about?
What are you talking about? You didn't think your wife was
the right person for you to marry and are you married here?
What? Girl, don't feel guilty and I
understand that you're a human being so your emotions are going
to take over and start feeling bad and think that you caused
him to kill himself. But baby girl, he is a married
man. You have no responsibility over
his head. His decision was his decision.
I understand that you're a human being and you're going to feel a
little bit of guilt, but I don't expect you to beat yourself,
right? I'm just even worried about
their wife and if they have kids their kids because a kind of a
is this. I'm a girl of 20 years old.
So there's this guy I'm dating. We started dating last year and
then later this year I found out that he is cheating on me with
different girls. But I really love this guy do I
caught him cheating. He asked me to forgive him which
I did but during that time back at my work please I met one guy
who said he likes me but wanted to help me.
At first I rejected his offer but with continuous request I
accepted. And this guy I'm talking about
here is Mario. So we started dating.
When Fast forward he will ask me to give him money for something
claiming he will give it back. Which I used to give him the
help. Which I used to give him the
help that he said he wanted to help me.
He didn't even say anything about it again.
But still I was still with him because I have grown to love him
and not because of what he will give.
One afternoon he called me telling me he's in need of an
amount of money like 3000 ganassitis which he promised to
give back to me having sex. During that time I decided to
help him. After giving him the money we
still cool with each other but it got to a point which I
realized he just wanted to be using and dumping me.
So I decided to take back my money.
I I borrowed him and after I will leave him for good because
I saw that I was just fooling myself.
I asked him to give me the money back which he refused telling me
if he gives me the money I'm going to leave him so he won't
give it to me but I also need the money for some business.
The next thing he said was if I agreed to meet him twice a week
then he can decide to give me the money.
On top of your own money? The hell is all this on top of
your own money? Kay?
Now you're being give, he's giving you what ultimatum on top
of your own money? AI also don't know how to get my
money back but I was thinking of dealing with him spiritually for
all that he did to me. On the other hand, I want to
forgive and forget but whenever I think of it, it's always
painful. I don't really know what to do
please help. Share your idea with no insults,
please. A With no insults like I've been
insulting you. A OK now let me tell you
something baby girl, I think you added with no insult because you
know what is going on is not rational.
It doesn't make sense that you allow somebody to take your
money. First of all, you were dating a
single guy. The guy was cheating on you.
You decided to live in good for you.
I lied that for you. But to go date a married man
that was stupid that I'm going to insult you over that was that
was crazy to move from a single cheating man to a man cheating
on his wife. What's so different about that
now that's entertaino you are also the one taking care of this
married man that promised to even like help you and take care
of it. What what was going on in your
mind now giving my money to what has become a that he's the one
giving you what to meet him that meet him twice a week.
That's why he's a week is for what's having sex with you.
That's why he's a week is for what you giving your body to him
for your money back. What is it for now?
You want to deal with him spiritually?
That one day is to your discretion.
If you want to do that, I won't stop you.
I won't stop you. It's your discretion.
But what I'm going to tell you is that take your money back.
I don't know how you're going to take the money back.
I'm not going to sit here and approve.
Oh, yeah. Go and do spiritual things.
Oh, yeah. He deserves spiritual that one
day. I'm not going to approve it or
disapprove it. It's to your discretion.
Recently. Yeah.
I've got to tell myself this. Make decisions you can live
with. OK, Yeah, Make decisions you can
live with. I've come to the conclusion that
you can't always make the right decisions.
So make decisions that in the near future, when things starts
to boil down or when things starts to crack down, you can be
able to live with that decision. And so if it's spiritual where
you want to go, make sure you can live with it.
If it's prayer, you want to pray on his head, pray on his head.
But before you pray on his head, I need you to ask for
forgiveness because what you did in the first case is is crazy.
Yeah, so the spiritual part there is to your discretion, my
love. Do as you wish.
OK? Yes.
And also to the comment section. Please give her your thoughts on
what you think she can do to get her money back or to this
married man. But baby girl, that was a silly
thing that you did right there 'cause Jam.
That's what's love you. That's love you.
Hi, I've been viewing your post for a while now and I want you
to help me. I fucked up or I messed up big
time and she does not want me again.
I had this military protocol on my lap and that I needed money
to pay and get the job so I had to take money from people I knew
they can help us for it After paying the money to the
government had been posting the dates of recruiting and I took
the money for my pressuring me to pay back their money to them
because they have been seeing me home lately and I had no option
at the time. By then my lady's father had
bought her a new laptop and she gave it to me to use and I sold
it to pay back the money I owned without informing her.
So she asked and I told her and and that is all.
She got bored about it and told her family what I did to him and
now the family is asking me to bring back their laptop else
they are going to arrest me instead.
My intention was after I'm done with training I will buy her the
same as hers and I also had plans for her.
Indeed. I really love this lady.
So that's what you did OK, That's what you did.
See, her father is coming to arrest you.
Do you know why I'm. I'm arguing with the arrest.
But the fact that you say I have plans for her.
I have plans for her, guys, let me tell you.
And this man can lie. God, you have plans for who?
That the lady pussy clean your mouth.
Like wipe your mouth. Because that thing where you are
with somebody and then when breakup comes or when something
happens and then yeah, no, you know, I had plans for you.
You left her the wrong time. You know, I had plans for you.
This is just by the side. Because in this case, you fucked
up real time, right? In real life, you fucked up.
But all I know is that if the parents arrest you, they have
due course. If the parents say, yeah, we
want to get your ass in prison, if you don't get a laptop back,
they have due course. I don't know how to advise you.
I don't know how to share my opinion over this because I
agree with the family and I agree with the girl especially
after you said I had plans for you.
Don't you didn't have any plans for here my dear?
You did not have any plans for here.
You, you literally duped here on top of everything maybe both in
the family and you now and beg and explain situation to them.
Maybe they will agree. The hell is all this a now
you're this Imran. See what what's what's what's
wrong with you people? What's what's what goes on in
your head? You're this young man.
Cause a how? Anyway, That's what she's
saying, Shah. She wants to arrest you.
Good for her. I'm not even seeing anything
wrong with what she's saying. Cry.
I don't see anything wrong with what she's saying.
Frankly speaking, I don't see anything wrong with what she's
saying. OK guys, thank you for watching
this episode. I'm going to end it.
I know it's not too long when it comes to the stories, but
forgive me, I will be coming with another episode next week
with more GC stories, with longer stories.
The story will be longer. I know.
And I'll see you in the next episode.
My name is Nanika Adeba, and hopefully at the end of this
episode, you know something about mental health.
You've learned a little about mental health.
Don't forget that. This episode is proudly
sponsored by Verna Jacob Water. Yes, you're part of the people
that sponsored this episode. They said it's mental health
awareness month. And so let's talk about mental
health. And I did that for you.
And then also I got a lot of snacks.
Oh my God, these people said let me spoil you because you are
busy talk about mental health and because mental health is
also important to you. And so thank you guys so much
for also bringing these products to me.
I appreciate it so much guys. It'd be nice to be so be nice to
them and then purchase their products.
Please follow them everywhere. Thank you very much for watching
this episode. I will see you in the next
episode, but please take care of yourself and take a break when
you need to because your mental health is important.
My name is Nanika Adipai and I'll see you in the next
episode. Bye.