Right now, Kirsten, Kirsten, it will help.
Sometimes I don't understand some of we women, people that
actually want us, we, we behave like we don't want them.
Either we actually don't want them or we use them.
I, I love you. That is why I'm doing this with
you. But I that person, there is just
no no, if they love you, they will respect you enough not to
do certain things. If they posted it on social
media, if they posted it on social media, if they posted it
on social media, then they made it our business.
And since they made it our business, we go make it our
business. Let's read some stories.
My name is Annie Katapandes is the Pew Report cast.
Please subscribe, like and share.
Now let's get into the very first story.
Let's. Love it, let's love.
It I got into a relationship with my friends ex after they
broke up. We've been dating for a while
now. I've been feeling guilty
especially since my friend is in the service and we haven't
talked since it happened. I'm a data analyst and the
weight of it has been getting to me.
Now I'm thinking about ending the relationship but I'm scared
and unsure what to do. I don't want to hurt him but I
also don't feel at peace with how things are.
Please kindly help me out and prompt me when you post it.
I need people's ideas. You know what this is what I
think. You feel guilty.
Call your friend and talk to him.
I, I I really don't. You've already started a
relationship, you already like the girl, and I don't know if
there's anything wrong with the relationship yet, but if there's
nothing wrong with the relationship, I really do not
think that you should just end it because of the guilt.
But speak to your friend and know where the thoughts are.
I don't know whether people cannot use phones when they're
in the service or anything, but don't end it yet.
Maybe tell her that you're feeling some form of guilt.
Don't keep it to yourself. Don't keep the guilt to yourself
alone. Talk to your partner because
both of you made the decision knowing very well that she was
the ex of your friend. You understand.
So talk to her and then know what she also thinks about it.
Don't keep it to yourself. I feel like people keep so much
to themselves in relationships that it worries more than any
other thing, and that is what keeps a lot of people you know
messing up in relationships. Do not keep things from your
partner. If you feel a certain way, tell
the person. If something is going wrong,
tell the person. Let the person know what you
think. All right?
Especially when it's about the relationship.
Dear Ekia, you can call me Kweku.
On January, things were not really going through for me, so
I came to Tema to work as a cleaner.
But on April my sister's friend came to visit here with someone
not knowing that Lady she brought to my sister's place was
Muslim. So that girl's family wanted to
arrest my sister's friend. They even wanted to kill her but
my mom wants to talk to them. So the girl went and he left
with only my sister's friend. She was very beautiful.
So I proposed to hear that I love and that that evening we
ended up having sex. Not knowing the girl did not
love me, I asked her if she's dating, she said no.
Every day this girl use my phone to message someone I asked about
that she told me it is her brother.
So this girl won't went back to SHS.
She was in a final year so when the girl left I promise her that
I'm working so that I can get money.
So after she completes school she will we will rent a house to
get up so that we will start life here in Tema.
So one day I was using my Snapchat and I found my
girlfriend's Snapchat account. I was shocked not knowing that
guy she was messaging and said it was her brother was her
boyfriend. This girl don't even go to
school but always wants to visit the guy.
She even sent her nudes to the so-called Clinton.
What really pains me is that the guy is a scammer.
So I asked her about it and this girl said we should break up and
ending up blocking me everywhere.
I cried for three weeks. The hard truth is I have cursed
the girl and I will never change it.
This is her account. And then he tags the girl.
Funny enough, I have a Clint thing in my my, my, my life.
I know someone called Clint thing and then I knew a quick,
quick. He's my brother-in-law.
So it's it's just funny how quirks Clinton, you guys, your
namesakes. OK, I don't know what you want
me to make out of this, but I just feel like you should move
on right now. Casting casting Lydia, I told
you. But I also think that you guys
moved too fast. You proposed to her and in that
same day or in just a couple of days, you guys end up having
sex. It's it's too it was too fast
for my liking. But anyways, sometimes you can't
just tell. So, huh.
Sorry about that. Hopefully you've been able to
move on. That's love it.
Dear Ekia, I've been in a
relationship with a girl for six years, and it's interesting that
she had a child with other men who haven't taken responsibility
for the child. I thought she needed physical
affection because I had been awake at boarding school for two
years. But in the last eight months,
she started to misbehave. Oddly, I learned from her
siblings and her child that she was seeing a guy she often hangs
out with, whom she refers to as her best friend.
However, this guy is actually her ex, and during our
disagreement she has been praising him and making
comparisons, eventually introducing him as her boyfriend
and the father of her child. But when I try asking her about
this that her siblings and child told me, she got angry saying
all sorts of head for words. So I want to know what to do
because there's a girl my family and her family are aware of.
We want to get engaged by this case.
She rather loves her ex-boyfriend and prefers being
with him but tells me always that she only does nasty things
with me because I'm the one she loves.
That is just as bad. No, no, no, no, don't allow
that. I think last week we tackled
comparisons and then I said, one of the things that I said, man,
you do not need to tolerate is comparisons because at the end
of the day, it'll break your soul.
If she wants a baby daddy, give her a baby.
Let's let's her go and be with the baby daddy.
And tomorrow, if the person really loved you and wanted to
be with you, the person wouldn't have made you a baby baby Mama.
The person ended up making you a baby Mama and you're, you're,
you're fondling yourself around the person, somebody that wants
you. Sometimes I don't understand
some of we women, people that actually want us.
We, we behave like we don't want them.
Either we actually don't want them or we use them.
And it's unfortunate that some of these things happen.
It's sad, but my guys, please, when a woman shows you that she
doesn't like you, she doesn't like you, don't allow her to use
gimmicks to lie to you. I, I love you.
That is why I'm doing this with you.
But I that person, there is just no no.
If they love you, they will respect you enough not to do
certain things. Why do you keep a best friend?
Why would anybody keep a different gender as their best
friend? I know it works for some people,
but for the majority of people it doesn't work.
So I don't know why people keep doing it.
Let's love it. Let's love.
It I'm a young girl of 22. I'm very hard working but not
always lucky in relationships. I want to join the military but
currently manage my mom's pharmacy.
And about the military they are promising us probably next
month. OK I texted you to help me get a
good and a responsible guy. I have my own money and I just
need love but anyone I find ends up ghosting me.
I'm a very nice person but not just like in relationships.
I'd be grateful if you could help me.
And I told her that I don't do much making and she said she
knows but she doesn't know why she still feels that I could
help. And so if you're interested,
please send me Adm baby girl. If you're also still here, be in
the comments section. I probably try to interact with
those that would say they're interested.
And dear me again, like we send me a message, let me open it and
know that it's you because after screenshots and I really don't
know if whether I like Jana stands.
So we send me a message. Let me see.
Because of the anonymous thing I want to keep going on.
So we send me a message and let's take it from there, OK?
She has her own money. She would meet somebody that is
also responsible. If you're not a responsible man,
it's not even about the money. If you're not a responsible guy,
do not come here. Don't go and fold my hand.
I need somebody that is responsible, that is ready to be
in an actual relationship. I don't need any Brooking person
here coming to go and use the girl because I know how it feels
when a girl gets ghosted on Du Yemen.
No, don't come here if you're not serious, OK?
Please keep me anonymous. There's this girl I've been
seeing some time now. I'm truly in love with this
girl, ideally love her and have decided instead of going around
chasing different girls, why don't I stick to her so we can
build something great together. She has shown me that she's also
ready to build something with me.
We spent time together, talk about life here and there.
In fact, I don't have a friend so I took her as my everything.
I talked to her about things I'm not supposed to, she does same
and there's not suspicious about her first word.
Before I start, I asked her why she broke up with her ex and she
said the guy brought in another woman to spend the night with
because she doesn't spend the night with him.
So she caught him and they broke up.
However, to my surprise I found out she and her ex.
Oh where's the rest? Ah, where's the rest?
If she's in in doing anything with her ex, leave her.
Forget it. She's not as serious.
She's not serious. If you say you want to be in a
relationship and you are consistently having
conversations with your ex, you're not ready to move on.
You're really not ready to move on.
I'm not saying that you can't be friends with your ex.
I'm saying that there's always supposed to be boundaries.
Somebody that cheated on you, according to you, how are you
still friends? Were you not hits?
It didn't hits. You are friends with that person
hey? Or you're texting that person.
That's crazy dear. Please keep me anonymous.
I have been dating this girl for about 7 months now.
When we started dating fresh she had a friend let's call her ex.
This friend of her didn't like me for no reason.
She advises my girl to leave because she says she feels like
I don't have any money because I'm a student.
Fast forward me and this my girlfriend started dating in
November that I wasn't really into her and she wasn't really
into me too but we were cool. In December when her school went
on Christmas break she stayed in school.
I asked her why she said when she goes home there's lots of
problems there and she's not ready for that and I said OK.
So during the break I used to go to the hostel when I'm less busy
to spend time with her and I'm less busy during the weekend.
So every time I go and visit her during the weekend this friend
called X would call her that they should go out and they are
always going to house which I didn't believe was true.
I couldn't complain because the relationship was new and this
was something I wasn't happy about.
So I decided to break up with her after Christmas.
So Fast forward we entered into a new year January this my girl
and her friend X stopped talking.
I asked their wifey I'm not talking again.
She told me the girl is not talking to her because she was
with me. I was happy they were not
talking up because I didn't like the girl.
She looked too bad for me. Fast forward in March they gone
vacated this. My girl didn't go home again
because she said she wants to do internship.
I said OK. So during the school vacation my
girl and I lived together. Her birthday came we went out to
have fun I got her other gifts in addition.
So while we lived together she was showing me a snap from her
memories. Then she forgot and left her
phone with me. So I was watching her memories
and I realized that most of her snaps she takes them in hotel
washrooms. So I got confused and asked her
that. So the house party she has been
going to this is the place she couldn't she couldn't talk not
knowing the girl was doing hookup with her ex friend and
eggs X girl was the one who introduced her to the hookah
thing. I told her to tell me the truth
about the snaps I've seen on her phone and she was like before I
started dating her she had some sugar that this she was with but
then she wanted to stop and have a fuel of real love.
Someone who will love her. That's why she came to date me.
Fast forward, I agreed to forgive this girl and honestly
I've forgiven her. I don't think about it but then
she has this lifestyle I don't like.
She keeps a lot of male friends and entertain boys who like him.
I've complained about it severally but then I don't see
any change. A time came she needed money to
do a business. I gave her the money to run the
business and she ran at a loss and I became broke for some
time. This girl went to ask a guy she
claims she's friends with for money and the guy gave her 500
CDs which she she told me about. After she took the money I
realized they make video calls and I told her I don't like that
act she's entertaining this guy or man.
I've complained about it. So I'm tired and now I have met
this New Girl I'm talking to and this girl has been nice to me
and showed love to me ever since I met her.
She later found out her other girlfriend but then this girl is
calm about it. She's doing everything to win my
heart but I love my girlfriend but because these things she has
been doing I'm not happy with her.
So now I'm confused. I don't know if I should break
up with her and be with the other girl.
Please I need your opinion. This is what I can tell you for
free. This girl, this New Girl may be
good but maybe she's good for the meantime trying to win you
over. The other girl.
I don't like the fact that she's entertaining other people and I
I hate the fact that she's not, you know, listening to you.
I'm not saying that, you know, leave your girl and won't be
with the other girl. This is what I'm going to tell
you. Give your girlfriend this
information that if she's, she's ready to have a relationship
with you, she needs to let go of every other thing that is around
here. I, I don't think that it has to
do with the money. Even if the guy gave her the
money, that should have been, you know, someone needed a
favor. She had a favor and she got it
from someone else. I, I, I I don't think that if it
should be a problem in the sense that, OK, I need help, I'm
broke, I need help. My friend has helped me.
That's it. I feel like that's it.
That's the end of it. It mustn't be as in, because
you've helped me, you're going to be on phone with me all the
time. I'm entertain you.
When I have a man, then my man will be angry.
It's, it's just crazy. So let the girl know that what
she's doing is pushing you away and into the arms of another
person. And if she's OK with that, then
you want to break up with it. Me, I like it when you're
straightforward about setting things like, for example, if you
cheat right now and she sees it, she'll cry.
Not cheating on me, right? But if you tell her that,
listen, what you're doing is pushing me into the arms of
another person, I love you, but what you're doing is pushing me.
And if you push me and I go, do not cry.
Do not make me look like I'm bad.
And this is not gaslighting. It's not manipulation.
This is real. This is truth.
This is letting the person know what is on the ground.
Yeah. Because sometimes you just got
to let people know that what you're doing is is crazy.
What you're doing is madness. And they need to stop.
Thank you for watching the episode.
I'll see you in the next episode.
Don't forget to subscribe, like and then share.
This is the POV podcast. My name is Nanika Depend.
I'll see you in the next episode.
Please subscribe, like and then share.
Please share, share, share for others to have access to it.
And please be good in your relationships because in this
generation, it's difficult to get good people to be with.
Stop messing around. I'll see you in the next
episode. Bye.