1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,160 Right now, Kirsten, Kirsten, it will help. 2 00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:05,120 Sometimes I don't understand some of we women, people that 3 00:00:05,120 --> 00:00:08,039 actually want us, we, we behave like we don't want them. 4 00:00:08,280 --> 00:00:10,200 Either we actually don't want them or we use them. 5 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:12,920 I, I love you. That is why I'm doing this with 6 00:00:12,920 --> 00:00:16,000 you. But I that person, there is just 7 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:19,520 no no, if they love you, they will respect you enough not to 8 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:30,560 do certain things. If they posted it on social 9 00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:35,440 media, if they posted it on social media, if they posted it 10 00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:38,960 on social media, then they made it our business. 11 00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:41,800 And since they made it our business, we go make it our 12 00:00:41,800 --> 00:00:43,720 business. Let's read some stories. 13 00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:47,120 My name is Annie Katapandes is the Pew Report cast. 14 00:00:47,120 --> 00:00:49,240 Please subscribe, like and share. 15 00:00:49,240 --> 00:00:51,240 Now let's get into the very first story. 16 00:00:51,240 --> 00:00:53,760 Let's. Love it, let's love. 17 00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:58,520 It I got into a relationship with my friends ex after they 18 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:00,760 broke up. We've been dating for a while 19 00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:03,240 now. I've been feeling guilty 20 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:06,480 especially since my friend is in the service and we haven't 21 00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:10,200 talked since it happened. I'm a data analyst and the 22 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:12,680 weight of it has been getting to me. 23 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,360 Now I'm thinking about ending the relationship but I'm scared 24 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:18,440 and unsure what to do. I don't want to hurt him but I 25 00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:21,520 also don't feel at peace with how things are. 26 00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:25,480 Please kindly help me out and prompt me when you post it. 27 00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:31,960 I need people's ideas. You know what this is what I 28 00:01:31,960 --> 00:01:33,280 think. You feel guilty. 29 00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:34,840 Call your friend and talk to him. 30 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:39,080 I, I I really don't. You've already started a 31 00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:42,920 relationship, you already like the girl, and I don't know if 32 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:46,160 there's anything wrong with the relationship yet, but if there's 33 00:01:46,160 --> 00:01:48,280 nothing wrong with the relationship, I really do not 34 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:52,000 think that you should just end it because of the guilt. 35 00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,960 But speak to your friend and know where the thoughts are. 36 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:57,560 I don't know whether people cannot use phones when they're 37 00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:00,960 in the service or anything, but don't end it yet. 38 00:02:00,960 --> 00:02:04,480 Maybe tell her that you're feeling some form of guilt. 39 00:02:04,720 --> 00:02:07,240 Don't keep it to yourself. Don't keep the guilt to yourself 40 00:02:07,240 --> 00:02:08,840 alone. Talk to your partner because 41 00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:11,000 both of you made the decision knowing very well that she was 42 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,160 the ex of your friend. You understand. 43 00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:16,280 So talk to her and then know what she also thinks about it. 44 00:02:16,280 --> 00:02:19,400 Don't keep it to yourself. I feel like people keep so much 45 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:22,800 to themselves in relationships that it worries more than any 46 00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:25,480 other thing, and that is what keeps a lot of people you know 47 00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:29,480 messing up in relationships. Do not keep things from your 48 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:31,080 partner. If you feel a certain way, tell 49 00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:32,960 the person. If something is going wrong, 50 00:02:32,960 --> 00:02:34,800 tell the person. Let the person know what you 51 00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:35,800 think. All right? 52 00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:37,960 Especially when it's about the relationship. 53 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:44,040 Dear Ekia, you can call me Kweku. 54 00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:47,680 On January, things were not really going through for me, so 55 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:49,840 I came to Tema to work as a cleaner. 56 00:02:50,080 --> 00:02:53,800 But on April my sister's friend came to visit here with someone 57 00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:58,720 not knowing that Lady she brought to my sister's place was 58 00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,760 Muslim. So that girl's family wanted to 59 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:05,760 arrest my sister's friend. They even wanted to kill her but 60 00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:10,040 my mom wants to talk to them. So the girl went and he left 61 00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:13,760 with only my sister's friend. She was very beautiful. 62 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:17,760 So I proposed to hear that I love and that that evening we 63 00:03:17,760 --> 00:03:20,280 ended up having sex. Not knowing the girl did not 64 00:03:20,280 --> 00:03:23,840 love me, I asked her if she's dating, she said no. 65 00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:27,680 Every day this girl use my phone to message someone I asked about 66 00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:29,840 that she told me it is her brother. 67 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:32,840 So this girl won't went back to SHS. 68 00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:37,760 She was in a final year so when the girl left I promise her that 69 00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:39,440 I'm working so that I can get money. 70 00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:42,280 So after she completes school she will we will rent a house to 71 00:03:42,280 --> 00:03:45,600 get up so that we will start life here in Tema. 72 00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:49,120 So one day I was using my Snapchat and I found my 73 00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:53,000 girlfriend's Snapchat account. I was shocked not knowing that 74 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:57,760 guy she was messaging and said it was her brother was her 75 00:03:57,760 --> 00:03:59,680 boyfriend. This girl don't even go to 76 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:02,240 school but always wants to visit the guy. 77 00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:05,280 She even sent her nudes to the so-called Clinton. 78 00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:08,360 What really pains me is that the guy is a scammer. 79 00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:12,640 So I asked her about it and this girl said we should break up and 80 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:14,240 ending up blocking me everywhere. 81 00:04:14,520 --> 00:04:18,040 I cried for three weeks. The hard truth is I have cursed 82 00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:20,200 the girl and I will never change it. 83 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:23,560 This is her account. And then he tags the girl. 84 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:28,320 Funny enough, I have a Clint thing in my my, my, my life. 85 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:30,920 I know someone called Clint thing and then I knew a quick, 86 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:32,120 quick. He's my brother-in-law. 87 00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:43,840 So it's it's just funny how quirks Clinton, you guys, your 88 00:04:43,840 --> 00:04:49,640 namesakes. OK, I don't know what you want 89 00:04:49,640 --> 00:04:52,200 me to make out of this, but I just feel like you should move 90 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:55,920 on right now. Casting casting Lydia, I told 91 00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:57,800 you. But I also think that you guys 92 00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:00,560 moved too fast. You proposed to her and in that 93 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:02,760 same day or in just a couple of days, you guys end up having 94 00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:05,160 sex. It's it's too it was too fast 95 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:08,280 for my liking. But anyways, sometimes you can't 96 00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:14,360 just tell. So, huh. 97 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:16,320 Sorry about that. Hopefully you've been able to 98 00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:19,000 move on. That's love it. 99 00:05:19,120 --> 00:05:21,960 That's love it. Dear Ekia, I've been in a 100 00:05:21,960 --> 00:05:26,280 relationship with a girl for six years, and it's interesting that 101 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:30,680 she had a child with other men who haven't taken responsibility 102 00:05:30,680 --> 00:05:32,880 for the child. I thought she needed physical 103 00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:36,520 affection because I had been awake at boarding school for two 104 00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:38,600 years. But in the last eight months, 105 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:43,560 she started to misbehave. Oddly, I learned from her 106 00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:47,480 siblings and her child that she was seeing a guy she often hangs 107 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:50,480 out with, whom she refers to as her best friend. 108 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:54,080 However, this guy is actually her ex, and during our 109 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:56,840 disagreement she has been praising him and making 110 00:05:56,840 --> 00:06:00,560 comparisons, eventually introducing him as her boyfriend 111 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:04,880 and the father of her child. But when I try asking her about 112 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:09,960 this that her siblings and child told me, she got angry saying 113 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:13,040 all sorts of head for words. So I want to know what to do 114 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:17,240 because there's a girl my family and her family are aware of. 115 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:20,360 We want to get engaged by this case. 116 00:06:20,360 --> 00:06:22,560 She rather loves her ex-boyfriend and prefers being 117 00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:27,080 with him but tells me always that she only does nasty things 118 00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:29,120 with me because I'm the one she loves. 119 00:06:29,520 --> 00:06:33,120 That is just as bad. No, no, no, no, don't allow 120 00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:36,280 that. I think last week we tackled 121 00:06:36,280 --> 00:06:40,240 comparisons and then I said, one of the things that I said, man, 122 00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:43,640 you do not need to tolerate is comparisons because at the end 123 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:44,920 of the day, it'll break your soul. 124 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:47,960 If she wants a baby daddy, give her a baby. 125 00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:49,720 Let's let's her go and be with the baby daddy. 126 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:52,720 And tomorrow, if the person really loved you and wanted to 127 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:54,880 be with you, the person wouldn't have made you a baby baby Mama. 128 00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:58,560 The person ended up making you a baby Mama and you're, you're, 129 00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:01,800 you're fondling yourself around the person, somebody that wants 130 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:02,920 you. Sometimes I don't understand 131 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:05,320 some of we women, people that actually want us. 132 00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:07,240 We, we behave like we don't want them. 133 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:09,600 Either we actually don't want them or we use them. 134 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:11,960 And it's unfortunate that some of these things happen. 135 00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:16,720 It's sad, but my guys, please, when a woman shows you that she 136 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:19,200 doesn't like you, she doesn't like you, don't allow her to use 137 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:23,160 gimmicks to lie to you. I, I love you. 138 00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:24,720 That is why I'm doing this with you. 139 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:29,120 But I that person, there is just no no. 140 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,200 If they love you, they will respect you enough not to do 141 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,880 certain things. Why do you keep a best friend? 142 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:36,760 Why would anybody keep a different gender as their best 143 00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:38,960 friend? I know it works for some people, 144 00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:41,480 but for the majority of people it doesn't work. 145 00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:43,720 So I don't know why people keep doing it. 146 00:07:45,560 --> 00:07:46,360 Let's love it. Let's love. 147 00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:50,240 It I'm a young girl of 22. I'm very hard working but not 148 00:07:50,240 --> 00:07:54,320 always lucky in relationships. I want to join the military but 149 00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:56,720 currently manage my mom's pharmacy. 150 00:07:56,880 --> 00:08:00,120 And about the military they are promising us probably next 151 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,640 month. OK I texted you to help me get a 152 00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:07,640 good and a responsible guy. I have my own money and I just 153 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:11,040 need love but anyone I find ends up ghosting me. 154 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:15,280 I'm a very nice person but not just like in relationships. 155 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,120 I'd be grateful if you could help me. 156 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:21,680 And I told her that I don't do much making and she said she 157 00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:24,960 knows but she doesn't know why she still feels that I could 158 00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:29,320 help. And so if you're interested, 159 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:35,360 please send me Adm baby girl. If you're also still here, be in 160 00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:37,880 the comments section. I probably try to interact with 161 00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,760 those that would say they're interested. 162 00:08:39,919 --> 00:08:42,600 And dear me again, like we send me a message, let me open it and 163 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:44,600 know that it's you because after screenshots and I really don't 164 00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:48,320 know if whether I like Jana stands. 165 00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:50,280 So we send me a message. Let me see. 166 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,440 Because of the anonymous thing I want to keep going on. 167 00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:56,120 So we send me a message and let's take it from there, OK? 168 00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:58,680 She has her own money. She would meet somebody that is 169 00:08:58,680 --> 00:09:00,680 also responsible. If you're not a responsible man, 170 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:02,760 it's not even about the money. If you're not a responsible guy, 171 00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:04,520 do not come here. Don't go and fold my hand. 172 00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:07,360 I need somebody that is responsible, that is ready to be 173 00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:09,920 in an actual relationship. I don't need any Brooking person 174 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:12,400 here coming to go and use the girl because I know how it feels 175 00:09:12,520 --> 00:09:14,600 when a girl gets ghosted on Du Yemen. 176 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:21,200 No, don't come here if you're not serious, OK? 177 00:09:21,240 --> 00:09:23,160 Please keep me anonymous. There's this girl I've been 178 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:25,880 seeing some time now. I'm truly in love with this 179 00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:29,560 girl, ideally love her and have decided instead of going around 180 00:09:29,560 --> 00:09:32,960 chasing different girls, why don't I stick to her so we can 181 00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:37,000 build something great together. She has shown me that she's also 182 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,760 ready to build something with me. 183 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:41,480 We spent time together, talk about life here and there. 184 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:45,480 In fact, I don't have a friend so I took her as my everything. 185 00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:49,080 I talked to her about things I'm not supposed to, she does same 186 00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:53,600 and there's not suspicious about her first word. 187 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:58,080 Before I start, I asked her why she broke up with her ex and she 188 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,760 said the guy brought in another woman to spend the night with 189 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:03,920 because she doesn't spend the night with him. 190 00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:05,880 So she caught him and they broke up. 191 00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:10,200 However, to my surprise I found out she and her ex. 192 00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:13,960 Oh where's the rest? Ah, where's the rest? 193 00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:18,800 If she's in in doing anything with her ex, leave her. 194 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:20,400 Forget it. She's not as serious. 195 00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:23,720 She's not serious. If you say you want to be in a 196 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:27,200 relationship and you are consistently having 197 00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:29,240 conversations with your ex, you're not ready to move on. 198 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:30,560 You're really not ready to move on. 199 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:34,160 I'm not saying that you can't be friends with your ex. 200 00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:36,400 I'm saying that there's always supposed to be boundaries. 201 00:10:36,600 --> 00:10:40,040 Somebody that cheated on you, according to you, how are you 202 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:41,440 still friends? Were you not hits? 203 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:43,400 It didn't hits. You are friends with that person 204 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,400 hey? Or you're texting that person. 205 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:51,240 That's crazy dear. Please keep me anonymous. 206 00:10:51,560 --> 00:10:54,520 I have been dating this girl for about 7 months now. 207 00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:59,680 When we started dating fresh she had a friend let's call her ex. 208 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:03,200 This friend of her didn't like me for no reason. 209 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:06,800 She advises my girl to leave because she says she feels like 210 00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:08,800 I don't have any money because I'm a student. 211 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:12,160 Fast forward me and this my girlfriend started dating in 212 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:16,160 November that I wasn't really into her and she wasn't really 213 00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:19,880 into me too but we were cool. In December when her school went 214 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,440 on Christmas break she stayed in school. 215 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:26,000 I asked her why she said when she goes home there's lots of 216 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:29,040 problems there and she's not ready for that and I said OK. 217 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:32,920 So during the break I used to go to the hostel when I'm less busy 218 00:11:32,920 --> 00:11:36,000 to spend time with her and I'm less busy during the weekend. 219 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:39,680 So every time I go and visit her during the weekend this friend 220 00:11:39,680 --> 00:11:43,640 called X would call her that they should go out and they are 221 00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:48,520 always going to house which I didn't believe was true. 222 00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:52,640 I couldn't complain because the relationship was new and this 223 00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:54,920 was something I wasn't happy about. 224 00:11:54,920 --> 00:11:56,920 So I decided to break up with her after Christmas. 225 00:11:56,920 --> 00:12:01,320 So Fast forward we entered into a new year January this my girl 226 00:12:01,320 --> 00:12:03,040 and her friend X stopped talking. 227 00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:04,920 I asked their wifey I'm not talking again. 228 00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:08,040 She told me the girl is not talking to her because she was 229 00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:09,920 with me. I was happy they were not 230 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:13,000 talking up because I didn't like the girl. 231 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:16,680 She looked too bad for me. Fast forward in March they gone 232 00:12:16,680 --> 00:12:19,160 vacated this. My girl didn't go home again 233 00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:21,680 because she said she wants to do internship. 234 00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:24,640 I said OK. So during the school vacation my 235 00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:28,280 girl and I lived together. Her birthday came we went out to 236 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:31,280 have fun I got her other gifts in addition. 237 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:34,760 So while we lived together she was showing me a snap from her 238 00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:37,120 memories. Then she forgot and left her 239 00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:39,160 phone with me. So I was watching her memories 240 00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:43,160 and I realized that most of her snaps she takes them in hotel 241 00:12:43,160 --> 00:12:46,040 washrooms. So I got confused and asked her 242 00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:48,400 that. So the house party she has been 243 00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:52,920 going to this is the place she couldn't she couldn't talk not 244 00:12:52,920 --> 00:12:56,400 knowing the girl was doing hookup with her ex friend and 245 00:12:56,400 --> 00:13:00,400 eggs X girl was the one who introduced her to the hookah 246 00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,360 thing. I told her to tell me the truth 247 00:13:02,360 --> 00:13:05,760 about the snaps I've seen on her phone and she was like before I 248 00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:09,880 started dating her she had some sugar that this she was with but 249 00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:13,600 then she wanted to stop and have a fuel of real love. 250 00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:16,480 Someone who will love her. That's why she came to date me. 251 00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:19,200 Fast forward, I agreed to forgive this girl and honestly 252 00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:21,920 I've forgiven her. I don't think about it but then 253 00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:24,520 she has this lifestyle I don't like. 254 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:27,840 She keeps a lot of male friends and entertain boys who like him. 255 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:31,400 I've complained about it severally but then I don't see 256 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:34,240 any change. A time came she needed money to 257 00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:36,480 do a business. I gave her the money to run the 258 00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:40,800 business and she ran at a loss and I became broke for some 259 00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:44,000 time. This girl went to ask a guy she 260 00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:47,080 claims she's friends with for money and the guy gave her 500 261 00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:51,560 CDs which she she told me about. After she took the money I 262 00:13:51,560 --> 00:13:54,800 realized they make video calls and I told her I don't like that 263 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:57,480 act she's entertaining this guy or man. 264 00:13:57,680 --> 00:14:00,800 I've complained about it. So I'm tired and now I have met 265 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:04,320 this New Girl I'm talking to and this girl has been nice to me 266 00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:07,160 and showed love to me ever since I met her. 267 00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:10,000 She later found out her other girlfriend but then this girl is 268 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,640 calm about it. She's doing everything to win my 269 00:14:12,640 --> 00:14:17,440 heart but I love my girlfriend but because these things she has 270 00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:19,280 been doing I'm not happy with her. 271 00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:21,640 So now I'm confused. I don't know if I should break 272 00:14:21,640 --> 00:14:23,920 up with her and be with the other girl. 273 00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:28,080 Please I need your opinion. This is what I can tell you for 274 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,880 free. This girl, this New Girl may be 275 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:35,040 good but maybe she's good for the meantime trying to win you 276 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:36,800 over. The other girl. 277 00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:39,960 I don't like the fact that she's entertaining other people and I 278 00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:45,400 I hate the fact that she's not, you know, listening to you. 279 00:14:49,880 --> 00:14:52,840 I'm not saying that, you know, leave your girl and won't be 280 00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:54,600 with the other girl. This is what I'm going to tell 281 00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:57,120 you. Give your girlfriend this 282 00:14:57,120 --> 00:15:01,320 information that if she's, she's ready to have a relationship 283 00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:04,520 with you, she needs to let go of every other thing that is around 284 00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,880 here. I, I don't think that it has to 285 00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:08,680 do with the money. Even if the guy gave her the 286 00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:11,440 money, that should have been, you know, someone needed a 287 00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:13,080 favor. She had a favor and she got it 288 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:17,920 from someone else. I, I, I I don't think that if it 289 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:21,720 should be a problem in the sense that, OK, I need help, I'm 290 00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:24,360 broke, I need help. My friend has helped me. 291 00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:26,760 That's it. I feel like that's it. 292 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:30,800 That's the end of it. It mustn't be as in, because 293 00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:34,400 you've helped me, you're going to be on phone with me all the 294 00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:35,320 time. I'm entertain you. 295 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,720 When I have a man, then my man will be angry. 296 00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:41,680 It's, it's just crazy. So let the girl know that what 297 00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:44,120 she's doing is pushing you away and into the arms of another 298 00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:46,200 person. And if she's OK with that, then 299 00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:50,520 you want to break up with it. Me, I like it when you're 300 00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:55,840 straightforward about setting things like, for example, if you 301 00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,160 cheat right now and she sees it, she'll cry. 302 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:03,520 Not cheating on me, right? But if you tell her that, 303 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:06,400 listen, what you're doing is pushing me into the arms of 304 00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:10,320 another person, I love you, but what you're doing is pushing me. 305 00:16:10,320 --> 00:16:13,280 And if you push me and I go, do not cry. 306 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,040 Do not make me look like I'm bad. 307 00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,320 And this is not gaslighting. It's not manipulation. 308 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:19,760 This is real. This is truth. 309 00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:22,440 This is letting the person know what is on the ground. 310 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:27,600 Yeah. Because sometimes you just got 311 00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:31,720 to let people know that what you're doing is is crazy. 312 00:16:31,720 --> 00:16:34,280 What you're doing is madness. And they need to stop. 313 00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:36,280 Thank you for watching the episode. 314 00:16:36,280 --> 00:16:37,520 I'll see you in the next episode. 315 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:40,200 Don't forget to subscribe, like and then share. 316 00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:43,200 This is the POV podcast. My name is Nanika Depend. 317 00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:44,360 I'll see you in the next episode. 318 00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:47,240 Please subscribe, like and then share. 319 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:50,800 Please share, share, share for others to have access to it. 320 00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:53,640 And please be good in your relationships because in this 321 00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:57,200 generation, it's difficult to get good people to be with. 322 00:16:57,480 --> 00:16:59,960 Stop messing around. I'll see you in the next 323 00:16:59,960 --> 00:17:01,080 episode. Bye.