1 00:00:01,320 --> 00:00:06,760 In 1839, George Washington Bethune, he was a Dutch Reformed 2 00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:08,240 pastor. He made this statement. 3 00:00:09,040 --> 00:00:14,520 He said perhaps no grace is less prayed for or less cultivated 4 00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:19,200 than gentleness. I think I would agree with him. 5 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:23,560 You might hear someone say I need to be more loving or, or, 6 00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:28,600 oh, I need to be patient or I need more peace in my life. 7 00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:34,600 But you're very unlikely to hear someone say I need to be more 8 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:38,600 gentle, right? Have you ever heard somebody say 9 00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:40,120 that? Probably not. 10 00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:43,720 Perhaps you have. But many Christians lack the 11 00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:45,680 gentleness that we desperately need. 12 00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:50,920 And in our Christian witness, often a curt or sharp response 13 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:54,960 is simply talked up to. Oh, that's just personality. 14 00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:57,680 That's just how he is. It's no big deal. 15 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:04,239 Sharp response may just seem normal, but it's not God's 16 00:01:04,239 --> 00:01:08,840 desire. When we look at God's character, 17 00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:13,960 generally speaking we can place his attributes into one of two 18 00:01:13,960 --> 00:01:18,640 categories. That is the masculine or the 19 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:23,760 feminine, the fatherly aspects as well as the motherly aspects. 20 00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:28,320 Scripture offers us a multi faceted view of Yahweh's 21 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:32,440 character. At times His masculine 22 00:01:32,440 --> 00:01:37,280 characteristics of strength and power are on display and at 23 00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:41,000 other times God's more feminine characteristics, His motherly 24 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:45,720 traits like love, patience, mercy, and gentleness are in 25 00:01:45,720 --> 00:01:49,440 view. Now please hear what I am not 26 00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:53,560 saying. I am not saying that God is a 27 00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:59,760 woman or that God is our mother. How did our Lord teach us to 28 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:04,320 pray? Jesus taught us to pray our 29 00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:08,440 Father. I think if Jesus addressed God 30 00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:13,400 as Father, I believe that's how we should address God as well. 31 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:17,920 God is perfect and he embodies all that is necessary to being 32 00:02:17,920 --> 00:02:20,760 God. And I think that is also model 33 00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:28,680 for for why we need husbands and wives because because we 34 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:33,560 complement each other, we both bring different things to the 35 00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:40,880 table, fathers and mothers. So we see this dual nature play 36 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:45,280 out in Isaiah 40 verse 10. Behold, the Lord God comes with 37 00:02:45,280 --> 00:02:49,960 might and his arm rules for him. Behold, his reward is with him 38 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:54,760 and his recompense before him, his might, his his arm ruling, 39 00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:56,880 having the power to pay, pay back. 40 00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:02,400 All this speaks to God's strength, his his masculine 41 00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:08,120 fatherly character traits. But then Isaiah quickly shifts 42 00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:12,120 gears in verse 11. He will tend his flock like a 43 00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:15,200 shepherd. He will gather the lambs in his 44 00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:18,520 arms. He will carry them in his bosom 45 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:21,440 and gently lead those that are with you. 46 00:03:24,160 --> 00:03:27,800 A shepherd has high concern for every last one of his sheep, and 47 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:30,280 especially the most vulnerable among them. 48 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:36,120 The lambs who are particularly needy, he carries them close to 49 00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:41,640 his chest and gently leads them. And to think of our great and 50 00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:45,640 mighty God working in such a gentle way is a wonderful and 51 00:03:45,640 --> 00:03:51,800 compelling picture. Almighty God stooping down into 52 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:56,880 our little lives and gently tending to our needs. 53 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:03,720 Both the Old and New Testament sometimes picture God as a as a 54 00:04:03,720 --> 00:04:07,200 mother hen. Mother hen gathers her chicks 55 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:10,360 and takes care of them. She shelters them under her 56 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:14,920 wing. Psalm 91 four reads. 57 00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:17,720 He will cover you with His opinions. 58 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:22,240 That is the outer parts of the wings, and under His wings you 59 00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:26,200 will find refuge. His faithfulness is a shield and 60 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:31,280 buckler. God is His people's protection 61 00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:34,800 and He shelters them. He parries the blows of the 62 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,160 enemy. When the enemy comes in to 63 00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:43,280 attack us next, we can look at God's gentleness as it is 64 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:50,240 displayed in Jesus. Matthew 1129 I predict I'm 65 00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:52,280 probably going to go through another whole water bottle this 66 00:04:52,280 --> 00:04:54,320 morning. I don't normally go through a 67 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:58,640 whole bottle, but last couple weeks I have and this morning I 68 00:04:58,640 --> 00:05:03,760 had throat coats. I do not do hot drinks. 69 00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:07,920 I did not like it. It just made me really hot. 70 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:15,480 So now I'm like trying to cool down, but I don't feel as bad as 71 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:17,120 I sound. Just so you know. 72 00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:22,320 I know I sound horrible. I was talking to someone the 73 00:05:22,360 --> 00:05:24,600 other day. They said, oh, I had this cough 74 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:28,200 that lingered for three weeks. I'm just like, oh, I don't want 75 00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:33,040 another week of this, but perhaps next week I'll have my 76 00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:34,120 voice back. We'll see. 77 00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:42,480 Matthew 1129 Jesus says take my yoke upon you and learn from me, 78 00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:47,000 for I am gentle and lowly in hearts and you will find rest 79 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:51,080 for your souls. Jesus told his followers that he 80 00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:55,640 was gentle and lowly. The word used here is is prowess 81 00:05:55,640 --> 00:06:00,560 and it and it's basic meaning is meek or or humble. 82 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:05,120 And we can contrast this with what the writer Hebrews 1/3 the 83 00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:10,280 writer there says Jesus upholds the universe by the word of his 84 00:06:10,280 --> 00:06:16,280 power. So Jesus as God embodies both 85 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:20,160 the masculine and the feminine, the fatherly and the motherly 86 00:06:20,160 --> 00:06:27,600 traits of God. He says come to me, learn from 87 00:06:27,600 --> 00:06:31,320 me. I am gentle and I am humble. 88 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:39,760 Matthew also quotes Zechariah 9. Matthew 21 says, say to the 89 00:06:39,760 --> 00:06:43,120 daughter of Zion, behold, your king is coming to you humble and 90 00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:47,240 mounted on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a beast of burden. 91 00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:51,720 Matthew and Zechariah are describing the coming king. 92 00:06:52,920 --> 00:06:57,840 The coming king is humble. I don't know if you realize this 93 00:06:57,840 --> 00:07:03,240 is or not, but this is nonsense. Kings don't describe themselves 94 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:07,440 as humble. You may recall that when I 95 00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:10,400 candidated back in February, I mentioned that the Romans 96 00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:15,880 considered humility a vice and not a virtue. 97 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:19,240 Humility carried a negative connotation, and it was 98 00:07:19,240 --> 00:07:24,440 associated with low social standing, even shame. 99 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:28,240 This was the culture of Jesus day. 100 00:07:28,520 --> 00:07:31,440 No king worth his salt would have called himself humble. 101 00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:36,480 But that's how the Hebrew Scriptures describe Jesus, and 102 00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:40,560 that's how Matthew describes him here in Matthew 21. 103 00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:47,360 So looking at these verses moves us closer to a definition of 104 00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:51,160 gentleness. But we're not quite there yet. 105 00:07:52,720 --> 00:07:57,560 Before we define gentleness, I first need to dispel some myths 106 00:07:57,600 --> 00:08:05,120 about gentleness. First of all, gentleness is not 107 00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:10,720 weakness. There's there's a natural 108 00:08:10,720 --> 00:08:15,480 tendency for people to believe that gentleness and and meekness 109 00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:22,320 are weak, but that is simply not the case, as you'll see when we 110 00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:26,040 get to the actual definition. So gentleness is not weakness. 111 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:34,880 Also, gentleness is not passive aggression. 112 00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:38,720 Gentleness is not passive aggression. 113 00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:42,440 Being passively aggressive is a way to get back at someone for 114 00:08:42,440 --> 00:08:45,120 something without actually being aggressive. 115 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:51,240 It's manipulative, and when we engage these negative behavior 116 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:55,680 patterns, we do so in order to get our way and avoid 117 00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:59,280 communication with the person that we're at odds with. 118 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:04,520 There's nothing gentle about passive aggression. 119 00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:09,000 It's just another way to exacerbate conflict and act in a 120 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:16,760 petty, childish manner. And it occurs to me that even 121 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:25,600 the the vague Facebook complaint or post can be passive 122 00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:28,160 aggressive. So I would caution us to be 123 00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:36,440 careful in that manner also. Also, gentleness is not, this is 124 00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:45,160 a strong word, codependency. Codependency is an over 125 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:47,800 dependence on others. But in a sense where the 126 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:52,640 codependent focuses on helping other people, navigates the 127 00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:57,600 problems of life or they think they're helping the codependent 128 00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:01,520 loves even needs to be needed and they're quick to rush in and 129 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:06,640 to save the day. And it's difficult for the 130 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,320 codependent to give up this role. 131 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:13,320 It's it is after all what they live for being needed and and 132 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:17,520 they are as resistant to giving up this role as the addict is to 133 00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:21,600 staying clean. These are people pleasers who 134 00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:26,000 struggle to say no and often play the role of a martyr. 135 00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,120 As it relates to gentleness, there are a couple to 136 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:32,280 codependent traits for us to consider. 137 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,640 The codependence can be a pushover. 138 00:10:38,920 --> 00:10:42,760 The codependent is a pushover, always rescuing others, even 139 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:47,920 when it involves bailing in them out of the consequences for 140 00:10:47,920 --> 00:10:54,120 their poor choices. The codependence heart is huge, 141 00:10:56,600 --> 00:11:02,040 so they'll always rush in to rescue, but as they do, they 142 00:11:02,040 --> 00:11:05,680 minimize the problem and the consequences. 143 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:11,280 Gentleness is not being a pushover. 144 00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:19,120 The codependence is also a dishonest peacekeeper. 145 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:22,000 I know this is strong, but let me explain. 146 00:11:23,080 --> 00:11:28,960 The codependent avoids honesty and truth telling for the sake 147 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:34,160 of keeping the peace. We have to avoid conflict at all 148 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:38,640 costs, so the codependent does whatever they think that you 149 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:43,680 want them to do so that they can maintain the status quo and and 150 00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:48,400 not rock the boats. The top priority in life is all 151 00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:54,320 about pleading, pleasing others. So they seek to avoid conflict 152 00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:59,720 and in that they often are dishonest and are not honest 153 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:04,160 about the truth. Honesty in our conversations is 154 00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:12,960 an important part of gentleness. So Aristotle defined the word 155 00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:16,040 proud taste. The word translated gentleness. 156 00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:21,000 As he said, it's the mean between excessive proneness to 157 00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:26,280 anger and incapacity for anger. Thanks, Aristotle. 158 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:29,640 I'm not sure that you've really defined anything. 159 00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:33,800 Excessive proneness to anger, somewhere between excessive 160 00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:38,360 proneness and incapacity. There's a lot of ground between 161 00:12:38,360 --> 00:12:42,600 these two opposite poles and and it's not good to be at either 162 00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:45,720 end. Obviously, we don't want to be 163 00:12:45,720 --> 00:12:52,400 excessively prone to anger, but neither do we want to have an 164 00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:56,560 inability to become angry, as this can cause us to not see 165 00:12:56,560 --> 00:13:02,040 right from wrong or to or it can cause us to just sit idly by 166 00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:05,560 when injustice has been committed. 167 00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:11,520 Now, it's regrettable that the word gentleness today has come 168 00:13:11,520 --> 00:13:15,200 to have a connotation of weakness, A wimpy lack of 169 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:19,440 strength. However, as an expression of the 170 00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:25,400 fruit of the spirit, first of all, gentleness is strength 171 00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:31,320 under control. If you go to figure out online, 172 00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:35,520 you Google what is gentleness, you will come back with strength 173 00:13:35,800 --> 00:13:39,480 under control. This is how every pastor defines 174 00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:44,080 gentleness. So this serves as our basic 175 00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:47,960 definition. Sure, gentleness can can heal, 176 00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:52,560 uplift, inspire, and it involves choosing compassion, patience 177 00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:56,680 and love over anger, judgement and coercion. 178 00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:02,280 But gentleness is not, in a strict sense, soft. 179 00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:07,440 It is having the strength to control your emotions and 180 00:14:07,440 --> 00:14:13,360 actions, especially when when you find yourself in challenging 181 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:20,080 circumstances. Someone who's gentle won't 182 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:24,720 attempt to push others around or arrogantly impose his will on 183 00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:33,160 subordinates or peers. However, it's also important to 184 00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:37,840 realize gentleness isn't compat. It isn't incompatible with 185 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,320 decisive action and firm convictions. 186 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:45,480 Consider the fact that that Jesus, who is our premier 187 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:49,480 example of gentleness. Jesus could be gentle and 188 00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:55,800 forgiving with repentant sinners, yet he also cleanse the 189 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:59,120 temple because of the abuses of God's house. 190 00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:07,160 The word gentleness denotes a submissive and teachable spirit 191 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:12,760 toward God that manifests itself in genuine humility and 192 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:20,040 consideration of others. Now, this strength under control 193 00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:25,000 isn't something we we simply manifest on our own. 194 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,560 It's not forced. You can't force. 195 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:32,000 Its gentleness and meekness only come about by the power of the 196 00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:37,200 Spirit working in US. And gentleness is a sign of the 197 00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:42,400 Spirit's transformative power. It's a sign of the Spirit's 198 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:50,840 transformative power. Let's talk about the Apostle 199 00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:58,920 Paul for a moment. Before Christ, he was a horrible 200 00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:03,960 man. He hated Christians, and he 201 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:08,280 devoted his life to persecuting followers of the way. 202 00:16:10,280 --> 00:16:15,920 In Acts 7, Stephen gives a powerful gospel message, and he 203 00:16:15,920 --> 00:16:21,280 highlights some of Israel's past from from Abraham all the way up 204 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:26,560 through Solomon. And the Jews who heard Stephen's 205 00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:33,080 message were enraged at him. Then Acts 758 says they cast him 206 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:34,720 out of the city and they stoned him. 207 00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:37,720 And the witnesses laid down their garments at the feet of a 208 00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:44,480 young man named Saul. This young man, Saul, he seemed 209 00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:48,720 to kind of be overseeing the operation, if you will, giving, 210 00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:52,960 giving his approval of the stoning by by guarding the 211 00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:56,600 clothes of those who were engaged in stoning. 212 00:16:56,600 --> 00:17:05,079 This follower of Jesus, Stephen. Now, most of you know that Saul 213 00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:10,440 is Paul, but I want to correct something here. 214 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:15,520 If you've been around church long, you've likely heard that 215 00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:20,520 Saul's name was changed to Paul when he met Christ, right? 216 00:17:20,839 --> 00:17:27,599 We've heard this. However, we don't ever see 217 00:17:27,599 --> 00:17:33,280 Saul's name changed in Scripture and there are several instances 218 00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:36,680 where after his conversion experience on the road to 219 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:39,760 Damascus, he was referred to as Saul. 220 00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:44,280 First of all, Jesus referred to to him as Saul at the moment of 221 00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:49,920 his conversion, Later a disciple named Ananias. 222 00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:53,640 This is not the Ananias of Ananias and Sapphira fame. 223 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:58,400 This is a different Ananias. A good 1A disciple named Ananias 224 00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:04,080 was told to find Saul and Damascus and and to restore 225 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:09,400 Saul's sights. Acts 922 reads. 226 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:13,480 But Saul increased all the more in strength and confounded the 227 00:18:13,480 --> 00:18:17,480 Jews who lived in Damascus by proving that Jesus was the 228 00:18:17,480 --> 00:18:19,000 Christ. Who did this? 229 00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:22,280 It says it was Saul who was proving that Jesus was the 230 00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:27,440 Christ for some time after his conversion. 231 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:34,760 Saul used his Hebrew name, however when he became the 232 00:18:34,760 --> 00:18:40,960 apostle to the Gentiles as it says in Romans 11, he started 233 00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:46,120 going by his his Roman name which was Paul. 234 00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:52,800 Remember his goal was to be all things to all people. 235 00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:58,240 So using his Roman name instead of his Hebrew name only made 236 00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:02,800 sense when he was trying to reach Gentiles. 237 00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:11,160 So the apostle Paul was was no weakling. 238 00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:16,640 He had convictions and he very well could have hounded 239 00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:20,200 believers into obedience as he had in his former life. 240 00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:28,840 But now, after Christ, gentleness flowed from his 241 00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:33,040 experience of God's grace. He exercised his strength in 242 00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:37,960 order to serve others and draw them to God through obedience. 243 00:19:40,840 --> 00:19:45,560 In spite of his his strength and strong personality, he was a 244 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:48,840 very strong, driven, driven person. 245 00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:55,360 He was able to say in First Thessalonians 27 as he writes to 246 00:19:55,360 --> 00:20:02,200 them, but we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother 247 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:07,880 taking care of her own children. So. 248 00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:12,800 Before his conversion, Paul goes from breathing threats and 249 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:19,000 murders against followers of the way to comparing himself to a 250 00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:24,080 mother who shows gentle, tender care to her baby. 251 00:20:25,440 --> 00:20:31,280 This was truly a sign of the spirits transformative working 252 00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:38,360 in Paul. Then in Ephesians 4, he writes, 253 00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:45,000 I therefore a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a 254 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:49,680 manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called with 255 00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:55,440 all humility and gentleness, patience, bearing with one 256 00:20:55,440 --> 00:21:00,520 another in love. Walking in a manner worthy of 257 00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:04,880 Our Calling means that as Christians our lives will 258 00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:09,000 demonstrate humility and gentleness. 259 00:21:09,800 --> 00:21:12,080 It's only fitting for us to walk in this manner and show 260 00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:15,280 deference and patience and love to others. 261 00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:21,480 So another way that's the strength under control is 262 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:29,320 demonstrated is in kindness. We show this in kindness. 263 00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:41,200 Proverbs 1821 tells us death and life are in the power of the 264 00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:46,800 tongue. We can tear people down, or we 265 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:50,440 can build them up with our mouths. 266 00:21:52,760 --> 00:22:00,400 First Peter 315 reads In your hearts, honor Christ the Lord as 267 00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:05,240 holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who 268 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:11,600 asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you, yet do it 269 00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:19,240 with gentleness and respect. Have you ever had a conversation 270 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:22,360 with someone who's contrary to the Christian faith? 271 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:27,280 When we get in discussions about the veracity of the Christian 272 00:22:27,280 --> 00:22:32,360 faith, things can get heated. We're strongly convicted of the 273 00:22:32,360 --> 00:22:36,600 truth of the gospel, and the other light other side is likely 274 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,360 convicted. That's the Bible and Christian 275 00:22:39,360 --> 00:22:44,560 faith, or false, or that Jesus wasn't really as exclusive as we 276 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:51,560 claim he is. It can be easy for us if we're 277 00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:57,360 not careful to become unglued and completely lose it and 278 00:22:57,360 --> 00:23:05,320 things get a little heated, but that's not what God wants. 279 00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:11,800 Peter told these Christians who were experiencing much 280 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:15,520 persecution for their faith. He said be ready to defend the 281 00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:20,040 gospel, to offer an apologetic for the gospel and the hope that 282 00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:28,360 is inside of us, but do it with gentleness and respect. 283 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:34,040 Don't lose your mind trying to defend the gospel. 284 00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:37,640 Don't let the other person get better of you and cause you to 285 00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:46,640 become angry, but utilize that strength under control and offer 286 00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:53,520 your firm and convicted response and humility and gentleness. 287 00:23:57,840 --> 00:24:06,200 The gospel is offensive, but we ourselves should not be 288 00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:09,840 offensive when we offer a gospel apologetic with kindness. 289 00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:14,920 We serve the gospel and our own personal witness well. 290 00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:21,360 Let people be offended by the message of the truth and not by 291 00:24:21,360 --> 00:24:29,040 your actions and demeanor. Our gentleness should also be 292 00:24:29,040 --> 00:24:33,880 displayed as we are gracious in correction. 293 00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:38,920 We want to be gracious in correction. 294 00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:48,640 Have you ever been confronted by someone in a gracious manner? 295 00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:55,880 I hope so. It's profound and can actually 296 00:24:55,880 --> 00:25:00,960 lead to life change. The tone of the correction isn't 297 00:25:01,280 --> 00:25:05,320 accusatory, but rather it's gracious, calling you to live 298 00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:09,880 life in the right way in spite of your past failures. 299 00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:15,440 When we confront with gentleness, there's a higher 300 00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:21,760 likelihood of being heard and not being immediately dismissed 301 00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:27,200 and talking about the character of the leaders of the church, 302 00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:31,680 Paul told Timothy in Second Timothy 224 through 25. 303 00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:37,160 And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome, that is the 304 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:41,640 leaders of the church pastors not to be quarrelsome, but kind 305 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:46,160 to everyone, able to teach patiently enduring evil, 306 00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:50,200 correcting his opponents with gentleness. 307 00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:53,840 God may perhaps grant them repentance, leading to a 308 00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:58,280 knowledge of the truth. Gentle correction helps people 309 00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:02,800 better see their ways and understand God's desires for 310 00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:06,640 their life. Paul also gives us warning about 311 00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:08,600 confronting others in Galatians 6. 312 00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:13,360 He says brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression. 313 00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:18,760 If if someone, one of one of your your peers is caught in a 314 00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:25,280 sin, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit 315 00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:31,600 of gentleness, keeping watch on yourself lest you also be 316 00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:41,560 tempted. Gentleness and in correction 317 00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:45,880 doesn't only help the other person to be able to hear what 318 00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:51,440 we're saying, but gentleness in in correction also helps us as 319 00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:58,200 we are maintaining humility. It helps us to keep watch over 320 00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:03,600 our own selves so that we aren't tempted to fall into sin. 321 00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:08,840 Also, as we confront someone else, so our actions in 322 00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:12,720 restoring someone should be in humility and grace. 323 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:18,160 The last point I want to make about gentleness being strength 324 00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:23,960 under control is that gentleness is a sign of wisdom. 325 00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:33,040 It's a sign of wisdom. You know when you've met the 326 00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:38,680 gentle person, their strength is under control and they tend to 327 00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:47,080 have measured, wisdom filled responses, James 313 reads. 328 00:27:47,720 --> 00:27:52,120 Who is wise in understanding among you by his good conduct. 329 00:27:52,520 --> 00:27:56,200 Let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. 330 00:27:57,560 --> 00:28:01,280 The person who has wisdom and understanding isn't just smart 331 00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:05,600 and filled with information. This person doesn't simply 332 00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:12,520 acquire truth. They apply truth and wisdom is 333 00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:14,720 demonstrated in their gentle, humble spirits. 334 00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,120 You won't see this person fly off the handle. 335 00:28:19,120 --> 00:28:23,640 Wisdom has has shaped them and taught them that true wisdom 336 00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:34,720 acts in humility and gentleness. So gentleness is strength under 337 00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:36,440 control. It's a sign of the Spirit's 338 00:28:36,440 --> 00:28:39,400 transformative power. It's kind, it's gracious and 339 00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:41,320 correction. It's a sign of wisdom. 340 00:28:42,520 --> 00:28:48,800 So how do we come by gentleness in our own lives? 341 00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:55,520 The first thing we do is we seek God. 342 00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:59,000 We seek God. And I know this sounds trite and 343 00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:03,160 I say this every week, but it has to be said. 344 00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:08,520 We're not going to manufacture gentleness on our own. 345 00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:12,320 We're not going to coerce ourselves into gentleness. 346 00:29:12,960 --> 00:29:16,640 It must be something that the Holy Spirit works in US. 347 00:29:16,640 --> 00:29:21,160 And in order for that to happen, we need to spend time with God. 348 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:30,920 Zephaniah 2/3 Seek the Lord, all you humble of the land, who do 349 00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:35,400 His just commands. Seek righteousness, Seek 350 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:39,000 humility. Perhaps you may be hidden on the 351 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:43,560 day of the anger of the Lord. Seek Him. 352 00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:50,320 I would also encourage you to pray for gentleness. 353 00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:55,840 Pray that the Holy Spirit would grow this fruit inside of you. 354 00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:00,000 When you know you're going to encounter a situation that'll 355 00:30:00,280 --> 00:30:03,880 press the limits of your capacity to model gentleness, 356 00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:10,680 then pray for the Holy Spirit to fill you up and empower you to 357 00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:16,400 respond in the spirits and not in the flesh. 358 00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:24,520 Another key to gentleness is mindfulness in our thoughts and 359 00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:28,160 actions. This is mindfulness in our 360 00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:34,760 thoughts and actions. I found that having a heightened 361 00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:38,520 awareness of this need in my life and interactions has helped 362 00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:42,440 me immensely. If you're blind to something, 363 00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:47,960 then it increases the likelihood of you acting out that sin. 364 00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:55,760 However, when I am mindful of this need, I approach 365 00:30:55,760 --> 00:31:03,400 circumstances differently. A couple years ago I went 366 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:07,200 through a particularly difficult season of ministry. 367 00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:12,160 Some of it self-inflicted, some of it not. 368 00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:17,240 God had revealed some blind spots to me. 369 00:31:17,720 --> 00:31:21,560 Generally speaking, you see, I am very in tune to what is 370 00:31:21,560 --> 00:31:25,120 happening in the room when relationships aren't right or 371 00:31:25,120 --> 00:31:28,920 someone is upset. I can tell, I can feel it. 372 00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:35,280 I just know. However, I had been blind to 373 00:31:35,280 --> 00:31:39,560 something I had done, and God wanted to round off this this 374 00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:47,040 rough edge of my character. I'd hurt some people with whom 375 00:31:47,040 --> 00:31:50,200 I'd I'd had the privilege of ministering for a number of 376 00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:56,000 years. They were friends, even family 377 00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:57,120 to us. Really. 378 00:31:57,680 --> 00:32:02,520 They were very dear to us. But I'd hurt them and hadn't 379 00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:07,760 realized it. In a meeting with them, they 380 00:32:07,760 --> 00:32:12,520 told me how I'd hurt them with my words and how I'd been 381 00:32:12,520 --> 00:32:18,800 dismissive of them. I had absolutely no idea that 382 00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:22,240 this was happening and it and it hurt to know that I hurt others 383 00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:28,840 and I wasn't aware of it. I apologized explicitly and I 384 00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:33,320 asked for forgiveness, and the relationship has been even 385 00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:40,560 better ever since then. But you see, there were other 386 00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:46,520 people who are not aware of this conversation, but who also 387 00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:51,480 wanted to talk with me because I'd hurt them as well. 388 00:32:53,520 --> 00:32:57,960 Again, I had no idea. But you know what? 389 00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:04,840 I was more prepared for these conversations because I was 390 00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:09,320 mindful of the hurt that I'd caused that other couple. 391 00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:16,360 So I approached these conversations, as difficult as 392 00:33:16,360 --> 00:33:20,520 they were. I approached them with a 393 00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:28,840 different posture to listen and to try to respond in humility 394 00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:33,080 and to confess my sins and to make things right. 395 00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:38,800 Being aware of a liability in our character is half the 396 00:33:38,800 --> 00:33:44,160 battle. The rest of the battle is taking 397 00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:49,400 action to overcome that deficiency of character. 398 00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:57,600 Some questions to ask yourself, how can I demonstrate gentleness 399 00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:04,040 in this situation? Is my response indicative of 400 00:34:04,840 --> 00:34:10,440 humility and pride? Humility and pride? 401 00:34:11,639 --> 00:34:14,320 Humility or pride? I should actually read what I 402 00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:16,199 wrote. I wrote it correctly. 403 00:34:17,159 --> 00:34:21,120 Am I showing humility or am I showing pride? 404 00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:30,080 What does my response say about me and my attitude towards this 405 00:34:30,080 --> 00:34:38,600 person when I'm mindful of my potential response and and I'm 406 00:34:38,639 --> 00:34:44,480 prayed up that I'm more likely to respond in the spirit rather 407 00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:51,600 than in the flesh? Something else that has that 408 00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:55,719 also helped that initial conversation was the manner in 409 00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:59,160 which that couple approached my offenses. 410 00:35:01,320 --> 00:35:05,320 They didn't come to me angry or yelling at me in judgments. 411 00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:11,640 Instead they came to me in kindness with a soft demeanor 412 00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:16,120 speaking the truth and love as Paul says in Ephesians. 413 00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:25,840 Proverbs 15 four says a gentle tongue is a tree of life, but 414 00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:29,160 perverseness in it breaks the spirits. 415 00:35:31,480 --> 00:35:35,320 A gentle tongue brings life while sharp words can completely 416 00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:39,200 tear someone down. That couples approach of 417 00:35:39,200 --> 00:35:42,880 gentleness allowed me to better hear what they had to say and 418 00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:45,920 take it to heart. It's much easier to take 419 00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:49,600 correction when you don't feel like you're being scolded. 420 00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:54,720 You're not immediately placed in a position of defensiveness. 421 00:35:56,200 --> 00:36:00,480 Another key to gentleness is practice humility. 422 00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:06,640 Practice humility. Look for opportunities to 423 00:36:06,640 --> 00:36:11,080 demonstrate humility, not in the sense of false virtue signaling, 424 00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:20,080 but actual humility. Remember what Paul told the 425 00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:24,320 Philippian church in Philippians 2 verses 3 and 4. 426 00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:28,760 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility 427 00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:32,520 count others more significance than yourselves. 428 00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:38,480 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to 429 00:36:38,480 --> 00:36:45,400 the interests of others. Don't be selfish or conceited, 430 00:36:45,400 --> 00:36:50,600 but consider others as actually more important than yourself. 431 00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:55,920 This is one of the hardest things to do because if I'm 432 00:36:55,920 --> 00:36:59,680 being honest, I think I'm pretty important. 433 00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:09,560 But when I when I think of others more highly than myself 434 00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:17,320 and I start to look out for their interests, starts to 435 00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:24,320 transform what's inside of me. I'm not deceiving myself into 436 00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:28,600 humility. No, I'm actually changing on the 437 00:37:28,600 --> 00:37:32,160 inside. Practice humility and value 438 00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:39,600 others above yourself. Even even when you don't agree 439 00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:50,040 with them, value them. The last key to gentleness is be 440 00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:57,040 patient and forgiving. Be patient and forgiving. 441 00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:01,120 Gentleness requires us to be patient with others in their sin 442 00:38:01,120 --> 00:38:05,600 and extend forgiveness when they've wronged us. 443 00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:09,000 We do this because God has already forgiven us. 444 00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:12,360 He has demonstrated His own mercy, kindness, and gentleness 445 00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:16,360 to us and forgiven us for violating His ways. 446 00:38:18,200 --> 00:38:24,720 So when we exercise patience and forgiveness, we are being like 447 00:38:24,720 --> 00:38:31,120 God. I love the account and John 448 00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:34,760 eight of the woman caught in adultery. 449 00:38:37,920 --> 00:38:41,960 Jesus was at the temple and all these people had gathered to to 450 00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:44,960 hear him teach. Suddenly he was interrupted by 451 00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:47,880 the scribes and Pharisees declaring that they'd caught 452 00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:50,320 this woman in the very act of adultery. 453 00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:58,400 Now their goal was to catch Jesus in opposition to the law, 454 00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:04,160 and they reminded him that the law says she needs to be stoned. 455 00:39:06,680 --> 00:39:11,760 They hoped that he would just write her sin off and therefore 456 00:39:11,760 --> 00:39:18,480 show himself to not care about the law so that they could have 457 00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:24,720 something to charge him with. Jesus bends down. 458 00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:29,640 He starts writing in the sand. I'd love to know what he was 459 00:39:29,640 --> 00:39:31,320 writing. He starts writing in the sand. 460 00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:34,400 They, they kept going on and on about the situation. 461 00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,840 At some point he's done listening to them. 462 00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:43,280 He he stops writing in the sand. He stands up to speak and he 463 00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:50,920 says, you know what he says? Let him who is without sin among 464 00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:55,160 you be the first to throw a stone at her. 465 00:39:58,160 --> 00:40:03,720 He says. That drop the mic goes back to 466 00:40:03,720 --> 00:40:08,880 writing in the sand. What do you do in this situation 467 00:40:09,080 --> 00:40:13,800 if you have a rock in your hand? Jesus had, with a single 468 00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:17,320 statement, put everyone in their place. 469 00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:23,440 The oldest among them, the wise ones, realized. 470 00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:28,280 Their own sinfulness and they walked away. 471 00:40:30,560 --> 00:40:37,560 This happens over and over till every last accuser is gone. 472 00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:48,120 Jesus turns to the woman and asks who was left to condemn 473 00:40:48,120 --> 00:40:54,040 you? And she rightly responds, No one 474 00:40:54,040 --> 00:41:02,970 Lord. Now the word forgiveness isn't 475 00:41:02,970 --> 00:41:08,770 explicitly used here, but it is assumed when Jesus says to her, 476 00:41:09,770 --> 00:41:17,810 neither do I condemn you go and from now on sin no more the 477 00:41:17,810 --> 00:41:23,530 condemnation she deserved. Jesus could have condemned her 478 00:41:23,530 --> 00:41:30,400 for her sin rights, but no, He forgives her, chooses to not 479 00:41:30,600 --> 00:41:33,600 condemn her. That condemnation was eliminated 480 00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:38,320 and she was called to repentance as Jesus offered her His grace 481 00:41:39,080 --> 00:41:44,560 and forgiveness. As we close this morning, 482 00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:50,200 consider this. When someone you know is 483 00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:57,920 struggling or when you face conflict, what is your first 484 00:41:57,920 --> 00:42:02,960 instinct? Is it to control or dominate, or 485 00:42:03,160 --> 00:42:12,160 to have an outburst of anger? Or is it to offer gentleness? 486 00:42:15,960 --> 00:42:22,480 Think of Jesus, who, when surrounded by chaos, offered a 487 00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:26,360 gentleness that completely diffused the situation. 488 00:42:30,000 --> 00:42:33,120 The same power is available to you and I. 489 00:42:34,800 --> 00:42:39,160 My hope and prayer is that we not be known for our outbursts, 490 00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:42,720 but rather for our understanding, our willingness 491 00:42:42,720 --> 00:42:47,960 to yield into the good fruits of gentleness and mercy that spring 492 00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:51,400 from hearts transformed by Christ. 493 00:42:55,000 --> 00:43:00,720 As it says in Philippians 4. May our gentleness be evidence 494 00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:04,880 to all. Let's bow our heads and close 495 00:43:04,880 --> 00:43:15,290 our eyes. God, in these closing moments 496 00:43:15,290 --> 00:43:23,130 this morning, I pray for your gentle spirit to fill this 497 00:43:23,130 --> 00:43:29,720 place. Bring loving conviction where 498 00:43:29,720 --> 00:43:37,360 that is needed, but also lift people to understand that they 499 00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:53,520 can walk as you desire. So we pray, God, give me 500 00:43:53,520 --> 00:43:58,400 gentleness, give me strength under control, give me humility 501 00:43:58,400 --> 00:44:06,120 and meekness, the ability to control by the power of the Holy 502 00:44:06,120 --> 00:44:10,800 Spirit working in me, the ability to control my emotions 503 00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:13,560 and responses, especially in light of difficult 504 00:44:13,560 --> 00:44:21,400 circumstances. Holy Spirit, would you form this 505 00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:29,520 fruits of gentleness in US as we seek you, as we attempt to be 506 00:44:29,560 --> 00:44:33,960 mindful of our thoughts and actions and and practice 507 00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:41,800 humility and forgiveness. Work your way in our hearts and 508 00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:44,600 lives. It's in Jesus name we pray these 509 00:44:44,600 --> 00:44:46,520 things. Amen.