Greeting scum, and welcome to Flail of Face.
I am your Holmeister, Kevin, and I'm here with these now various
degrees of undead. Brains.
Hi I'm Thomas and I am playing Dalton Walls who is currently in
the body of a ghoul. I am Tom Gambino, currently
playing Colette Stellarno who is in the body of a zombie.
I'm Mr. Paschke. I'm playing Donnie, who is
currently a ghost that might, you know, think he's pretty.
Flail baby. Flail baby.
So last we left you guys off, you were transported from hole
to somewhere and you wake up and realize you're inhabiting the
body of various undead. As you guys are getting your
bearings, if you guys hear a voice echoing in your head.
Few things I forgot to mention while we were in the meeting
room. You guys are probably wondering
how you're going to get out of there and how you're going to be
bringing back the health spot the health.
Who the hell is that? It's it's me Bristol throat more
the Doctor the. Doctor.
Oh, Doc. Hi how you doing?
Hey, how you doing? Hi Donnie.
Hi.
OK, so so so keep going. You'll notice in your pockets
you'll find a small squishy putting filled being.
You'll know them as waisted here.
You're going to take these and and.
Before we get too far into it all, you guys roll me AD 6 and
let me know who's got who gets the highest.
I got a four. OK, five.
OK. Well, we both have fives, OK.
All right, so gambino Colette you'll notice in your pocket you
have two. What you're going to do once you
get to the health spot that you're bringing back to me,
you're going to actually eat these and you're going to put
the extra 1 you have in their mouth and close it.
That's how you guys come back to.
Us. So basically I just eat this wad
of gum. It's kind of a wad of gum.
It's also a lot. And you'll see that as you're
looking at it, it's eyes are kind of blinking and it cracks a
little bit of a smile and you hear like a little squishy
squeak out of it. Oh my God, I don't know how to
think of this. I mommy logistical question
here. Yes.
What if I don't quite have a mouth?
Just do. The best you can, we'll get you
back. Does that mean he's going to
have to bullfit? Yeah, I think that means it's a
Suppository. Then I.
Mean being the mostly in corporeal here, this might be a
touch of a issue. I'm sure you'll find a way to
get back. We'll burn that bridge when we
get there. There we go.
All right. So once you guys get to the hell
spot and bring it down, don't kill it because we need to
question it and figure out exactly what their plan is.
Stick this in through their mouth, hold it shut.
All of you guys take the waste it and chomp it down or Donnie
do whatever you have to do to get there and you will be
brought back into your body back here on hold back here on hold.
Aside from that, don't die. This is going to be taken away
at your prison sentence. So it only benefits you guys to
get this done and and as quick and timely as possible as.
Possible. A thought occurs doc.
Yes. How do we know the what this
hell spawn is if we don't know what exactly we're looking for?
Well the health spawn in this area is taking the form of a
necromancer, or if they think they're a necromancer hunched
over body wearing a skull of mask over their face cloak
really taking it to the extreme on this whole taking over the
persona of a necromancer. Now don't let that fool you,
they are no joke. So you have to be on your toes
and be vigilant. Vigilant.
Colette sticks the waist gets going to go well I guess.
Call on US doc. All right, well, we'll be
monitoring you and like I said, if you get this done in a timely
fashion, we can move on and find the other ones.
Good luck. This is your present sentence.
Present sentence. Well beat shuffling shit.
I guess, I don't know, like Dalton's going to look at the
waist in his pan, like flick it once in the face.
Oh, this is just going to be horrific.
And pockets it. Can can is mine visible as I'm
slightly transparent? Like is there like a floating
little oka? No, no, that you've got like a
little pouch that it will be hidden in and no one's going to
see it. I mean, we can see through you,
but that you can't see the waist.
So as you guys are sitting there talking amongst yourselves, out
from the shadows comes an old hunched over figure walking
slowly towards you guys. Well hello there.
Where did you guys come from? You guys don't look like you
belong here. Colette looks around at my
friends and I look back at this person and I just go up.
As opposed to where? Well, right now you are nowhere.
Yeah, kind of sums it up out. That that's starting to piss me
off, but I start like I, I noticed my hands have these like
abnormally long like claws and I start like squinting at this
guy. No, no, no, no, don't, don't get
me wrong here. Don't get me wrong.
I'm I'm here just to monitor this area.
My I apologize. My name is Zalia and I'm here
here against my will, unfortunately, to guard these
doors and make sure that whatever is on the other side of
those doors don't come back out into here.
I'm just wondering how you guys got here.
Yeah, what does Zalia look like? Zalia, an older female, kind of
hunched over, frail, looks like she's been here for God knows
how long. Just plain bland clothing.
Nothing shoots out as striking about this woman.
Long hair, kind of stringy, kind of greasy but not dirty, if that
makes any sense. And she just walks slowly
towards you guys. I am.
I'm just ironer. I don't know what to expect so.
Guys, I got to be really honest with you, I got a really strong
urge to just kind of dismember this person.
So like, you might want to negotiate whether she's friend
or foe real quick. OK, at this moment, Colette is
going to stand up and be like, OK, OK, Miss Zalia, that you'll
have to forgive us. We are.
Let's just say we're new to town.
And yeah, So what do you mean what's like what is behind that
door or any of these doors that is worth protecting?
Is it worth protecting you or everybody else in wherever we
are? I'm here to make sure that
whatever's beyond those doors do not come out.
I've been cursed here by the necromancer Nabetha.
Bone call to make sure that nothing leaves.
Occasionally. Granted.
Yeah. I mean, you look like something
that Nabetha would have brought up at for whatever nefarious.
Dealing matter of fact, yes, Nabetha did call us here.
He resurrected me from the dead. Oh God, I must be now what, 6-7
months now? Just just, you know, occasional
grunt work. Go to the graveyards and
cemeteries, pick other cadavers and corpses for basic
reanimation. You know they said good stuffy.
Now you know how he gets right, Sal.
Yes, I do know how the Nabetha gets.
I'm just wondering why you're here and not in one of the
rooms. Did you do something to be in
here or how did you guys? How did you all get here?
Well, you know what? That's a funny thing.
We were on our way back here and then one of the skeletons, what
was his name? Griever Grover, something like
that. He said.
Hey, we're just cleaning up in here.
We just mopped the floors. You stay here, like give us like
20-30 minutes, you can come back in.
No, OK, this odd. Where's the Betha?
That I don't know. I mean, the Betha traverses
between these doors at any given time.
I'm not sure which room she's in now.
OK. Then you're no used to be and
I'm going to lunch at her with my claws.
OK, go ahead, make an attack. That's a 10.
OK, you lunge at her and you attack.
She doesn't move. You catch her clothing and you
tear it right in the front and she doesn't seem fazed.
What was the point of that? At this point, Colette goes in
front of Thomas. Hey, buddy, buddy, buddy, buddy,
buddy. You just just a little hangry.
Hang on. I got your Snickers in here.
I'm so sorry. Hang on.
Yeah, it's just like real back, like a hand with claws, No.
Hang on, hang on. I got you, I got you, hang on.
And I'm just frantically looking for pretending to look for a
candy bar. And I look at, I look at Donnie
and I go just one second tell you, help me with him.
I possess her. I'm a ghost.
I'm allowed. To do that, yes.
OK, how are you going to do this?
While she's distracted, I come up from behind and I kind of
phase into her and take control of her body.
As you phase into her, you feel like you have not made that bond
into her body and she sidesteps out.
OK, what are the three of you actually doing here?
4 door sales people. We're selling Jelly beans.
You want one? I know you do.
Do you have the licorice ones? Oh, of course it's Licorice.
Look at him. OK.
That just makes me even more angry.
At this point, Colette just steps to the side and goes to
just then go at it big. OK.
Are you guys here for Nabetha? You could say that in a sense.
OK, I'm going to lay it out for you.
I don't know where Nabetha is. Trying to kill me is not going
to help you in getting to Nabetha.
Trust me. I've had people show up before
and do the same thing and I'm still here.
I am cursed here until Nabetha is gone.
I can never leave as well so taking out everything that you
have against me is not going to help.
I don't know their location because like I said, they just
traverse between the doors whenever they feel like it.
Your best bet, truth be told. Find a door, go through, see
what happens. You may find them.
I will warn you though, through whatever door you're going
through, there is going to be a different situation every time.
I've had wayward adventurers show up here for some reason in
search of fame and glory, going in into these rooms to never
come out again. This is Nabetha's domain.
She is here somewhere. That's.
Ominous. Were you Nabetha?
No, I'm Zalia. I just said that.
Examines face to see if there's like tan lines from a skull
mask. OK, no, there's no sunshine
here. There's no reason to have tan
lines. I can.
I can assure you I am not in the Betha.
Dalton scratches his head. And there's like, some like,
flower petals and leaves that fall out.
It was just like, looks at it. What the.
This body's dumb. You guys are aren't you guys are
confusing me. Yeah, yeah, sure, sure, lady.
I'm going to go find a door now and I'm just going to like walk
right past her. OK, by all means.
Before we go, is there anything in particular?
I'm already gone. Is that one second?
Is there anything in particular that we need to look for behind
one of these doors? Is there like, is there one
thing particularly bad that we should not do?
Behind these doors are different realm, that different world, a
different place in time. Oh oh cripe.
Oh shit. I'm not waiting for you anymore,
all. Right.
OK, OK. Azalea, thank you for all your
help. I got to go fucking stop down
Wolf's Mackenzie over here. OK.
Are you going towards one of the doors there, Thomas?
Sure AM. All right, roll AD 4. 2.
Okay, as you walk up to one of the doors, there's a sign above
the door, simple wooden sign. All it says is Fishing Hamlet.
And on the side of the door you'll see just a blank
parchment that as you walk up towards it, it starts to
illuminate with writing. The writing says there's a
village by the sea. Every full moon it appears on
the shore asking for a gift. In exchange, it brings peace and
seafood. There are no children in the
village and everything smells like rotten fish, brackish water
and smoke. Sounds lovely.
Well. We got to start somewhere and I
just kick the door open. I look back at Zalia and I just
go. Don't worry, we'll get you out
of here. As you look back, she's gone.
Oh fuck me then I guess. And as you kick open the door,
this huge vacuum pulls the three of you in and the door shuts
behind you. As you guys emerge into the
room, you find yourselves in a a pile of rotting flesh, partially
eaten with bones laying everywhere.
Lovely. As you're looking into the room
it's just covered in bones, like half eaten rotten flesh and
there is a small corridor going to the left and a longer
corridor going to the right. You do notice that there are
random items amongst the bodies, but it doesn't seem like there's
anything of value. Are there any bones that I can
like make into like a Shiv? Absolutely cool.
I'm going to find like a piece of rib or like a femur that I'm
just going to take from one of these piles of bones and meat
and just try to make a weapon out of it.
OK, yeah, I mean, it's not that hard.
There's shattered, half broken bones all around.
I'm sure you could find one that you can use as a as a Shiv.
I find like a nice thick femur that's kind of like broken off
and like kind of jagged at the end.
So it's like nice and pointy. OK, perfect.
And I just go dibs and then like my half a zombie Nate, since I
am half a zombie, I'm just like looking at it to just look for
me and I slowly just put it to my mouth and start gnawing on
it. Perfect.
Dalton starts like kind of digging around and like his
hands art very dexterous. He's like kind of just like
fumbling. It's like he's basically
forgotten how to like actually use his fingers as he's like
looking to search. It's just basically like he's
continuously punching stuff and clawing.
At it he's. Just punching.
And he's just like, this is they didn't warn us, some conflicting
memories. And he's starting to have
flashes of working in a field and digging in the field.
And he just all of a sudden is now just like, using his hands
and like disemboweled one of the corpses.
Perfect. Oh wow.
I'm. Floating.
You are floating. See, I can't interact with
anything in a physical sense, so you guys are doing a great job
and donnies there for moral support guys.
What? I I snap out of my chomping and
I just look up at Donnie goes, yeah, yeah, Donnie, like how are
you doing? And and all of this weirdness.
We we are corporeal. You're not.
Yeah, it's kind of hard to get my mind around.
See, there was nothing in the big book about this.
The, the, the Mecca Lama did not prepare me for that.
Now I've got the idea of something more evil that that
killed. Not me me.
Is anyone else wrestling with the fact that you have memories
of before you were here? Come to think of it, I do have.
Yeah, yeah. Get that right now?
Just start. Diving.
Back in. That's what I'm talking about
right there. See that?
Well, I remember some things like I would they see like a
town people walking by and I will be sticking my hands in
their pockets and just taking stuff.
I think I was a thief, a pickpocket maybe.
Weird. I wonder who this guy was.
I'm just like looking at my fingers and I I'm just feeling
around and I feel like the the stitches on my neck because my
head was like lopped off. And I remember the last thought
I had my head placed against the stump and the last thing I saw
was a guy in the black hood a slamming an axe down.
Then they go, oh fuck I how about we not dwell on this and
let's get the fuck out of here. So long hallway.
Yeah. All right, so as you guys are
going down the long hallway, it does take a nice turn as you
round the corner. You see in the middle of this
room appears to be a huge black puddle.
It's burbling. It smells like putrid fish but
for some reason it it's almost like the room or the if it's the
puddle or something it's whispering to you to.
All of us. To all of you, in fact,
everybody, go ahead and make a presence test.
Oh God. DR16.
Oh shit, hang on, I get my DR16. Yes.
I'm getting my big guy that. Is a -1.
Cool, my presence is A-016 on the fucking dot.
Nice. I got a mad 20.
Oh, beautiful. All right, so as Dalton is
hearing random noises echoing through his head, kind of
enraging him more Colette and Donnie, you hear the puddle
calling to you, saying seem to me, seem to me tell me stories
of the dying, the dying. I, I shout back at the puddle.
I ain't dead yet, you burbling little bitch.
How about you, Donnie? You going to listen to this
fucking puddle? Well, I could sing to you about
playing a game. Crocodile for a golden crocodile
board and losing. And Mama.
You know what? Tell them that.
Tell the puddle that. I'm sure the puddle would love
to hear that. Yeah, there it was, down in
Georgia when Deckerbell came with promises of a golden
crocodile board. But if I lost then, well, here I
am now. Anyways, that was a song.
I'm not a good singer. As you're telling the story of
how you lost your board game with Neckerbel, you notice that
the puddle starts changing. It goes from black to like a
reddish hue and it calls you drink, drink, drink.
I try to stop. I try to put my hand in front of
Donnie, then he just faces through it.
I'm like Donnie, why do I even fucking try?
See, here's the. Here's the problem.
I can't really tries to come and just the hands move through the
liquid I I physically. What's Dalton doing?
Does he hear what we're hearing? Am I?
Am I seeing it turn to red or? You are seeing it turn to a red
yes. That makes me angry and I'm
going to go start splashing into it.
OK, instantly the the puddle goes from that almost enchanting
vibrant red back to black, and then it starts getting thick and
thicker, almost like you're punching tar.
Keep swinging. Howling did rage.
Go ahead and make a strength check to see if you don't get
caught. That's a 7.
All right, so as you're punching, it's getting harder
and harder and harder for you to pull your arms out until
eventually both of your fists are stuck in this tar pit.
And he's the only one trapped. Yeah, everyone else, I, I'm
assuming we're on the edges of it.
So and you start to feel that the gravity in in this pit is
starting to get more dense and more dense as it's going from
your knuckles down to your wrists and up your forearms.
Is is Dalton, are you still, like, angry?
Trying to get out of there? What do you think?
I yes, I'm angry. OK, yes.
OK. OK.
Just checking. OK, Donnie, do you think can you
possess him and calm him down? For one D4 rounds, baby.
I'm thinking this works like quicksand, the more he struggles
the faster he sinks, so maybe just try to calm him down and
then I'll see what I can find and scrounge up to pull him out
of here. OK, Yeah, that sounds like a
plan. Can I possess him?
Yeah. All right, so we're all do you.
I think so. Let's see, it's a one on AD 4,
so. Yeah, you possess him for one
round, right? So are you trying to pull him
out as well? Yes, I'm going to try to pull
him out. I have a strength of +2.
OK. So I see Donnie enter Dalton and
Dalton like calms down and calms down.
But it has Dalton calmed down? Or is he more enraged that he's
been possessed now? I think at this point, like,
it's causing him like the possession kind of like puts him
back inside himself. So he starts reliving more of
the memories of this body that he is in now.
And he starts to get the images of what led to his death was
being like in a bin. And people like throwing flower
petals on them. And like there's this moment of
happiness as it's like a celebration, but then it doesn't
stop. And it starts like getting
heavier on him. And as these cheering people are
throwing more stuff onto him, he begins to feel the crushing
weight of everything above it. Crap.
All right, So what I will do then is I will have opposing
strength checks and I will give Colette advantage on that.
So Thomas and Tom Gambino go and roll opposing strength.
On advantage I got 16 + 2, so that's 18.
I got an 8. OK, so even though you're
reliving this beautiful yet horrific memory and it's still
sparking your rage, you find that you're being pulled and
yanked out of this now dense tar pit.
God, you're. Fucking happy.
Oh shit, OK, as soon as we get back to our fucking bodies, you
owe me a beer. All right, so as you guys are
getting your bearings straight, you see that the puddle starts
to loosen up and starts burbling again.
You'll also notice that there's a hallway beyond where you were
looking and a hallway to the South.
So it's like cut across from the puddle and then to the South?
Yes. OK.
Say, Professor, you mind if I call Sean on this point now?
What? Would you do you want, do you
want to go South or forward? Whatever lets me start swinging
at people. Then I guess.
Boy, that just sounds really not great.
Yogi OK there. We need to get out of these
bodies sooner rather than later. I agree with you.
I'm starting to get a hankering for brains and dits.
They're really bugging me. It's almost like I feel nothing,
like it's the emptiness of cold, but just hardly there.
Slowly start waving my hand through your body.
Yeah, I know. It's weird.
Right, so we're. Going to remember that you were
inside me once. I'm going to remember that too.
Let shutters and walks faster. Which way were you guys going?
I'm going forward opposite, like like beyond the puddle, not not
not to the South. OK, so as you go across the area
where the puddle is, you'll see another corridor that has a 90°
turn to the South, and as you ground that corner you see a
door. Hey, Don, you think you could
face through the door and just give us a little heads up?
Oh, absolutely I can. I just poke my head through the
door and kind of look around. OK as you phase through the door
you see inside is a warm and cozy room and it smells like
fish. But you do notice in the room
there is a small child sitting on one of the beds.
Hey kid, what are? You doing who?
Who are you? Oh, I'm just, well, Johnny,
Donnie. Anyhow, I'm here.
And is it safe? I mean, I, I suppose so it's
just just me in here, all right? Cool face, back out.
Go on. Yeah, everyone.
I think, I think we're good to go in there.
It's just this creepy kid. Collette.
Creepy kid. You know, sitting there by
himself on a bed smells like. Fish.
Well, why don't we? Do that.
Of course that's fucking dangerous.
Like $10 to Donuts. That kid is going to turn into
some weird fish person and try to eat us.
So I'm just going to get my bone shift ready and I put my hand on
the doorknob and I look at Don and go and you show.
You said nothing else. I mean, there's cozy.
Cozy. Comfortable feeling.
Cozy, comfy creepy kid I. Mean you might not be creepy, or
it could be the creepiest thing you have seen.
Guys, let's try to get through here because I can feel this
body's rage building again already.
If. You want to pop back in there?
Call me, yeah. OK, count the 10, count the 10.
I got this and I open the door and I see the kid on the bed and
I just point to him and I go. Are you a fish person?
No, no, I'm I'm a small girl. How did you?
Who are you? How did you guys get here?
Well, we're by means of feet and walking forward, which I am
doing right now to you. Hello, my name is Colette.
How are you, little girl? I am very confused of what's
going on. So wicked.
Yeah, my name is Elizabeth. Are you with the the monster
hunters that have been coming through here?
Monster hunters, No. Well, obviously not because you
guys and don't take offense please, but you guys look like
some monsters. None taken.
Are are you? Are you with the Necromancer?
Have you seen the Necromancer? Are you the Necromancer?
I am again, I am a little girl. I am by far not a necromancer.
I'm actually one of the children that the villagers from the
surface is tried to sacrifice. The necromancer came to town and
took over the minds of all the parents and they started killing
all the children and anybody visiting town just to appease
the whoever this necromancer is. And I was one of them.
They threw me down the well, I don't know how I survived, but
I, I hide here because I mean I I don't want to die.
Collette is trying really hard not to drool.
That that sounds like a really complicated back story and
everything, but can you give us a direction on where the
necromancer usually hangs out? Please be quickly because I'm
getting more angry. And and I'm pretty hungry.
You got any bacon or? What?
Do you eat? I, I, I go back up to the
surface every once in a while and steal food so that I can
live. But I, I'd live down here now
because I, I mean the, the, I don't know what happened with
all the villagers and the, my parents.
They just started killing everyone.
OK, what you say the name was Little girl?
My name is Elizabeth. OK, Elizabeth, who was the last?
What was the last thing you saw and how long ago was it?
The last thing I I've been, I, I couldn't even tell you how long
I've been down here. Oh.
Crap, alright. I mean, I roam the halls down
here every so often just so that I can get up and down to to the
surface to get food and and and books and stuff to so I'm not
alone. But I'm I am I?
The only thing I've actually ever seen down here recently was
a was a band of that They called themselves monster hunters, but
I I couldn't see how they would be.
They figured they'd be taking all the villagers out on the
surface, but as far as the necromancer I I don't remember
the last time I've seen them all.
Right. Well, this is a fine howdy do.
So how do you get onto the surface to the village?
There's a there's a well back in one of the other rooms that I
climb up and down the the rope for the bucket.
Which way is that? Show me the room before I decide
to do bad things, Colette. I'm just going to rub the back
of a Dalton's shoulders like OK, come on, deep breaths, deep.
There's a there's a like very visual flinch at that, that
initial touch. Sorry, my hands are very clammy.
I know this. I'm sorry about that.
Little girl. So if you can get out of here,
why not just leave town? There's no leaving town.
I go just as far as where I know the food is, where I won't get
caught if I stand stay any longer On the surface I I'm just
as doomed as all the other piles of bones in the other room.
Oh, oh shit. OK, so which way do you go to
get to the surface? Well, like I said, I I climb up
and down the rope that's connected to the bucket in the
well, I mean, I can, I can show you.
If you could, that would be. Lovely.
Yeah. I mean, you guys aren't going to
eat me or kill me or anything, are you?
Are you going to double cross us?
I am a little girl. What do I have to gain from
double? Crossing that like we trust you,
like you're a little girl. And quite frankly, I don't
fucking buy it. Language.
I am a child. The more you've just bought
that, the less. I agree with Michael and.
The longer you take to get us to the surface, the less likely you
are to survive this encounter, OK?
OK, you guys are gosh, you guys are worse than the monster
hunters coming down here. OK, come along.
Follow me. And as she walks past the three
of you down the hall back towards the black puddle, she
goes South. And as she's going South, you'll
see in that room there appears to be a bucket with a long rope
going up what appears to be a well.
And you can smell it. There's like traces of salty
water and dried blood, that irony smell in this area,
especially coming from the hallway down to the South as
well. And.
This is this is how I get get up, get up and down here.
So I mean, I don't know. I don't know what else do you
guys could want from me. That seems to be about it,
Thanks, and I'm going to start trying to climb.
OK, part of my zombie nature is kicking in and wants to just
take a bite out of her head, but something like grabs back to me
and I'll be like, thank you very much for all your help,
Elizabeth. I suggest you run along now and
we'll report back if we find anything, OK?
Yeah, I, I suppose, I mean, I mean, I guess this would be a
good time as they need to take a break.
Nice. Bad news, scum.
News scum. You died.
Sorry, sorry.
Even worse news, you've been resurrected by a mad
necromancer. Necromancer.
Why? Why does it matter?
Does it matter What's dead should stay dead, stay dead.
Especially considering the fact that your grave was warm, calm
and bleak more than anybody could ever wish for these days.
These days. And kill your necromancer.
Play as one of four undead to regain your peace.
Take it back and the only way to do it is to find her and kill
her. Break the spell with 32 pages of
rotten vowel content, 6 dark locations to roam.
You can fight other undead, thieves who seek to rob the
graves, scholars and seek of forbidden knowledge, or
adventurers trying to cleanse the dungeon for glory and gold.
Follow the link below to get your copy.
Fight, die, repeat. Hell is real is real.
Hell is not fire and flame. Flame is forms, forms, an
architecture of obligation. Hellspawn is a standalone
tabletop role-playing game of multiversal hunts, dance souls,
and the tools forged to bring them back.
You are that tool. You walk the dying worlds with
the chain in one hand and torments in the other.
Based on the Mert Borg Engine, compatible with Cyborg, Pirate
board, Frontier Scum and more. But it stands on its own.
Over 100 pages, full colored hardcover hardcover built to
burn to burn. Hell is coming, is coming.
The Kickstarter pre launch is live now.
Live now. Follow the link below and below
the wheel. Turns, turns.
You are sent sent. Come one, come all, join us as
we dive into the dying world of Mork Board and the Board
universe. Whispers of the Dying Lands is a
podcast with 1 mission to spread the word of Necrobel as third
party content creators share the prophecies of Viru I.
Your host Olasco's teams up with everyone's favorite they would
scum, Iron Tusk, Kevin from Flail to the Face.
You sit down with content creators to help promote and try
to give maximum exposure and efforts to support their
crowdfunding campaigns. Welcome back, Flail the face.
You guys found yourselves in what appears to be some sort of
fishing hamlet and found a little girl that you threatened
intimidated. Intimidated she was Well, she
insisted she was a little girl, she.
Politely received guidance. Right, so she showed you to the
area that she uses to go from where she's at underneath the
city to the surface so she can get food.
As you tell her to scurry off, you hear some noises coming from
the South, hear a couple of voices talking to each other in
hushed tones. OK, I, I bring in the guys close
and be like, So what do you think?
I we go towards the voices or try the oh, I say we, we bring
as little attention to ourselves as possible.
Find this mechomancer and get the fuck out of these bodies.
That may be a plan, but I can tell you right now, the first
person I see brandishing a weapon, I will dismember.
You know what? Fair enough, and I will not stop
you. Real quick, just follow me on
this. I turn invisible and then I turn
revisible and I'm like. Donnie, I kiss you, the true
corporeal. So Donnie turns invisible and
then goes closer to see. What's the noise?
Who are the things? As you head South Down the
hallway you'll come to a four way intersection, one that leads
to the South more and then hallways to the left and right.
You'll see that the hallway to the right has got like a closed
gated area and to the left you see that there is 3 individuals
fully clad with weaponry and Shields talking amongst
themselves. We we haven't found any sort of
anything to take back to get any sort of reward.
We're supposed to be monster hunters.
How is this supposed to happen? And then straight on, you notice
that the corridor kind of opens up to what appears to be like a
beach that has some very unnatural looking footprints
going from the water up the beach and then slowly fading
away. OK, so I go back, report what I
found to the group. OK.
I think they'll probably try to kill you too if we just
approached them. They're looking for monster, it
sounds. Like they're falling for a
fight. I I'm willing to get that to
them. You said there was three of
them. Three.
Yeah, Yeah, that sounds like an accurate number.
Well, if you could possess one of them, that'd be that would be
two against three. And I think that would be a
better fight for us if if it should come to that.
I'd start cracking my knuckles. Which it might be Donnie.
One more thing. What do these footprints look
like? Do do I recognize the
footprints? It's really hard to tell as the
water is washing them away, but they are large and kind of
clawed. OK, now we got a Loch Ness
Monster's cousin, I guess. Maybe a mermaid?
And as you guys are having this conversation, the voices that
you were hearing down the hallways are getting louder and
they start to round the corner. They're at the T section right
now, whereas you guys are in the area where the well is.
OK idea, I just fall to the ground like a corpse and just
play dead. I go invisible.
OK. I stand looking at them
questioningly. I just look at Dalton, I go
hide, you fucking dumbass. I try to go around the edge of
the well and just kind of like hunker down.
OK, as you guys are doing these various actions, these three
fellows walk in. One's got a shield and a sword.
The main guy in front has two swords strapped to his back and
he has a miserable look on his face.
The second guy that's right behind him, this guy looks like
he got hit with every ugly stick you could possibly find.
He is just. Ugly.
He's just, he, he is not a pretty man.
The one in the very back, you notice that he's like kind of
just nodding out like, like he's like he hasn't slept in a while
or he's like narcoleptic or something.
He just kind of is fading in and out.
As they're walking into the room proper, the main guy, the
miserable one, looks at the other two.
Von Klortz, this is ridiculous. We've been down here in these
chambers day in and day out. We haven't seen anything except
for corpses and more corpses. And like that ugly desiccated
corpse right there pointing it to you, Colette.
In my mind they go fucking rude and I still just like look like
a cadaver. OK, the second one, the ugly 1
is looking at the main guy Wriston.
Look, I've I've had enough hearing how we've been down
here. We got we have to do something.
We have to get some money, otherwise I can't pay off the
debt. I have to my father.
Trust me, the last thing I need to do is just hear about you
know how I've been worthless pile of shit though my whole
life. I I just can't, I can't do it.
The third guy, the one that looks like he's falling asleep,
like, can we just go? I can't, I can't do this
anymore. This is this is pointless.
This is fruitless. I like I need money too.
I And you'll notice that on the third guy, there's a very ornate
medallion hanging from his neck. Cool.
Are they? Are they, are these guys like
still walking? They're walking slowly.
They, they don't seem to have any sort of destination in mind.
They're trying to just like meandering through the halls of
the of this place. And they're in the well room
proper now, making their way towards the Black puddle.
Then you know what? I think Colette is just going to
snap up and bite the sleeve baby guy in the fucking neck.
The moment Colette moves, Dalton's going to lunge at the
ugly guy. OK.
And I possess the third one. Fantastic.
This sounds like a surprise round, so do the things you're
going to do, everybody. All right.
And then we'll roll initiative after.
That is a dirty 20. Love it. 2 rounds.
Damn it, that is a fucking 7. OK, so as Colette springs up and
goes to bite at the sleepy one at the end, he kind of just dips
his head like he's like nodding out and Colette snaps and misses
upon that movement. Dalton jumps up.
You are attacking the the. Ugly one.
The ugly one. Go ahead and make your attack
roll. I did.
I got The Dirty. 20 The Dirty 20 OK damage.
The seven damage. Seven damage.
They do have leather armor, so it's D2 for that.
Minus 1. 6. So who?
I'm just trying to think like the one I'm possessing.
Who is he closer to The ugly one?
Or is he closer to the tired? One, I think he's closer to the
ugly one. He's closer to the ugly one.
Yeah, he was the one in front. So tell me how you do this.
Attack Dalton. So it's just like lunging, like
jumping up and like scrambling. And I flung myself over the well
and then with my claw like fingernails, just like finding
purchase between his armor and just like digging my fingers
into the flesh underneath the armor.
Beautiful. Donnie, you said you were
possessing the one in the lead for two rounds.
Yes. OK, perfect.
Somebody roll initiative then. All right, I'll do it.
I got a three. All right, it is them.
So we'll start with you, Colette, the one that you went
to snap at wakes up very alert now and pulls out a dagger and
goes to swing at you. Go ahead and make a defense
role. Okay, so that would be hang on
one second. Agility.
Great, I have a -2 to agility.
Awesome, that's a 2. Okay, we got a. 4.
Okay. Colette, like come on, come on
you meat sack. You think I'm afraid of each?
Ow fuck. So that's going to be D4 damage.
Shit. Well, since I am a zombie, hang
on one second. I have 7 HP.
I have a rotten flesh, so I have armor that's minus D23.
That's three damage, but with my armor D2.
So hang on, I'm just going to do this.
That's a. Two.
OK, so you take one damage. So I take one damage.
OK, so as he goes to swing at you it just barely glances off
of your midsection it. Says every time I attack I lose
1 HP. Every time you attack.
Yeah but don't worry, I don't die if I go below 0.
OK but if I do all my stats go down -2 eating a fistful of
brain restores 1HP and resets the stats.
Well, there you go. All right.
Now I'm at what is that? So I'm at 5HP.
Well, boy. All right, so that's courts
turn. The ugly 1 is going to the ugly
one. You've basically tackled them.
You're on top of them, right? Yeah, okay, so he's going to
make a strength check to get out of it, and he does not have the
best strength and that's an 8. So he is still pinned, he can't
do anything. He's wiggling and writhing
around and just can't seem to get out.
And the other one, the third one wrist in the the leader, the
miserable one is possessed and he can't do anything.
So is your guys's turn. So now that I'm possessing him,
can I use him to attack the ugly one?
Absolutely. All right, cool.
I would like to stab the ugly one.
Now you have you have an iron sword and a silver sword.
What is he, a Witcher? I guess the the iron one.
OK. That's a 15.
That is a solid hit, all right, D6 damage, all right.
That's a sex. Tell me how you kill you, the
ugly one. Well, it's basically just like a
nice thrust to the throat, like a cut of a cut across and then
pull through and just blood just shooting out and you hear like a
gurgling noise. This ugly one's like lungs
filled with his own blood. Beautiful.
And then he just lays there dying.
Don't met this time like standing over seeing this guy
get killed. Now my kill and like goes and
throws the body at the sleepy guy.
OK, go ahead and make strength. How does the 12?
That will do it. You take the corpse of the ugly
guy and you throw it at the the narcoleptic guy and I will make
an agility test. I would assume his agility is
not that great. It is not that great and he
rolled A1, so he gets clobbered with the corpse of his
compatriot and he is knocked down under the body of the ugly.
One and the narcoleptic guy has the the medallion.
Improvised weapon? Is that like AD 4 then?
It is AD 4. Three damage his armor AD 2.
Yes, Sir. -1 so 2 damage. All right, Colette is going to
go over to the narcoleptic guy and I'm just going to look in
his eyes and I'm just going to be creepy as fuck.
And I'm going to say either you start talking or I start
jumping. What do you want me to say?
Where is Nebetha? Who the fuck is Nebetha?
We're here. Are you talking about the the
creepy person that convinced all the people in town to kill the
kids? I go exactly.
Wait, what? Well, yeah, what do you think
the pile of bodies were in the other room?
Oh fuck me. Have you seen this?
Fuck no. That's part of the reason why
we're down here and to kill you guys.
Well, that's very rude of you. Well, you're the undead.
Do you need to die? Well, contradiction speaking.
Of and then I'm going to try and climb Adam.
OK, make an attack. That'll be a 19.
That is a solid attack. Do those damages.
A very palpable hit. Seven points -1.
You can't not. Kill another 6.
Yeah, tell me about it. So yeah, the moment he says
that, he's here to kill you because your monsters.
And it's like, yeah, about that. Just like I go over and dig my
fingernails into the side of his skull and press into it and it
just kind of pops and then I like basically RIP off the top
of his scalp. And at this point, Colette
proceeds to just dig her hand in and just scoop out a nice
handful of brains, which restores my HP because I need to
eat brains. Yes, you do.
All right, Donnie, what are you doing?
As you're still possessing the body of their leader.
As you're possessing it, you you feel like it's fighting against
you. Like it?
It doesn't want to kill their partner there.
Well, first of all, I'm watching Colette eat brains and I'm just
like Oh my, I remember right when I had a mouth and I could
eat living flesh. That was good feeling back when.
Then I start to unbutton my shirt.
Not neurotic way this time. Hey y'all, I don't know how much
longer I'm going to be able to hold this guy.
If one of y'all just want to want to be on the ready and I'm
just like there. Colette looks at Donnie with a
mouthful of brains. I got.
This and I just started lying. You're supposed to be the smart
guy here. We need to interrogate him.
I got the blood lusted me God damn it.
Alright, don't go ahead, make your attack.
That is A4 all. Right, so as you were scampering
towards him and swiping at him, you could see that as he's got
his his shirt open, he he's fighting against whatever
Donnie's got going on. And he stumbles back and you
just barely swipe and miss. Now it's initiative.
And I think this is the turn that Donnie is done possessing
the body. So I think that that one's out.
Yeah. So go ahead and roll initiative.
You better eject it boy. Does you want me to roll it?
Yeah, go ahead. We're ready.
That's a six that is you guys. And I think at this point, I
think Colette is just going to, before Dalton can go, I think
Colette is just going to run up and tackle him and be like, it's
either it's either you either talk to me or you talk to my
blood hungry friend. So which fucking is it?
Go ahead and make a straight check for tackling him.
Well, that's a 17. OK, so you pounce on this guy as
Donnie leaves the body. He's trying to get his bearings
straight. You pounce on the body and
tackle him down. And what are you saying to him?
Where? Is the necromancer.
I yeah, I, I haven't seen the necromancer.
That's why I'm down here. That's why I was with my these
fucking corpses now. What?
How do we get out of here? How did you get in here?
I'm asking the questions here. Chuckle Fuck you.
Tell us how you got down here and then we'll get out of here.
Down the hallway, there's a stairway to the surface.
I don't that's how we got down here.
That's how we get down here every time.
Every time and it's just you 3. Yeah, we're the only ones stupid
enough and money hungry enough to come down here and look for
the undead. Well, that's.
Great. And then I just love gentlemen.
OK. Pull out murder hobo bro.
All right, that is a 17. That is OK, you hit him.
For another 7 damage. All right, kill.
Him. And he does have the D2 armor as
well so. OK, that's -2 so 5.
All right, he is looking pretty fucking beat up.
It's still pinned down. I.
Fuck it, at this point I'm hungry.
A girl needs to eat, so 16 + 2, that's 18 and I'm just going to
roll my eyes and just chomp down onto his fucking head.
OK, roll your damage. Damage is 3 damage.
All right. He is looking beat up.
He is looking bloodied. He is nearing death's door, but
he is still alive. Oh my.
God. Flailing around and he's
writing. He's fighting for life right
now. Donnie possess him and stab him.
I mean, can I just possess him again?
Kind of like cool down window on me Rebus dressing.
I think it's you can use one random spell per round, so I I
mean you could roll AD 6. Oh, do you have random spells?
Yeah, go ahead and roll AD 6 and see what you can do, OK?
Yeah, sure, sure. That's three.
Banshees cry deafening everyone around you.
Doesn't work on skeletons or ghosts, so yeah, do that as you
will. OK, yeah, just get all right up
in his ear and just yell as loud as I can.
All right, as you do that, Dalton, you see Donnie's ghastly
form just starts bellowing out a banshee scream, and it is
piercing to your ears as well as it's echoing off the the walls
of the room. And I assume for me as well.
And for you as well. Fuck.
Oh shit. What?
What?
Everyone says What?
You look around the corner. Elizabeth is poking her head out
and then walks away. You don't.
Need to see this as I look down at the liquefied pile of brains
and they go oh, I assume he's dead.
He is dead. Yeah, cool.
I'm just going to slurp up some rice, OK?
Like a jello pudding cup. So as you guys have dispatched
of these hunters, you hear footsteps coming up the walk
from the beach behind you. Oh well.
Well, well, well, well. I wasn't expecting well.
I don't even know who the three of you are, but I I've got to
thank you. These hunters have been on my on
my ass for who knows how long. Who are you?
You don't look like anything I've brought around.
And you'll see as as the voice gets louder and the footsteps
get louder, you can actually see a person in long cloaks with a a
skull face mask and a staff walking towards you but not
getting too close to you. Wear Jelly Bean Salesman.
Would you like a free sample? Do you have the black beans?
Of course this Does this look like the Necromancer?
This does look like the Necromancer.
Yeah, the free sample. Go ahead, eat it.
No. Who are you?
You don't. No.
You look like the bodies I've brought back, but you don't feel
like the personas that were with them.
Who are you? Are you?
Oh. Shit, Collette Look gets up,
wipes brain matter from her mouth and says Look.
Does that really matter, master? All right, Colette, roll a mouth
check. Oh, come on.
OK, Mouth, mouth, mouth. OK, sweet.
I got a one to mouth. That's a one.
No. Fuck, I'm.
Not I'm not buying it. Who are you?
Where Where are you from and why are you here?
Good questions, very logical questions that my friend Dalton
can answer. Get them.
Go ahead and roll initiative. I already didn't want one of you
guys do it. I'm scared too now.
On the plus side my my Google class thing here is I'm quick
and rabid so I always start 1st and must attack if I spot an
enemy. OK.
So my intent is to lunge at them and dig my claws in to hold them
in place. OK, go ahead and make an attack.
That's a 7. As you lunge at the body of the
necromancer, you do not make purchase.
You hit the ropes but there's nothing there behind it, and the
clothing dropped to the ground Jedi style, and you hear echoing
through the halls. This won't be the last you see,
and you should probably get that checked out because that looks
effective. This episode of Flail the Face
features the game's human occupied landfill by Todd
shaughnessy, Daniel thrawn and Chris Elliott.
Kill Your necromancer by Paul kikman and Hell Spawn by Richard
marker and Lee iovis With Thomas Gino Stumi playing Dalton walls,
Tom gambino playing Colette stellano, Charles patchkey
playing Donnie and Kevin Welch as the wholemeister.
Season 2 theme music is Void construct by out scroll editing
by Kevin Welch, episode art by Tom Gambino and video editing by
Dan Finey. And on behalf of the cast and
crew of flail the face, we want to thank all the listeners for
sticking with us. Without you, season 2 wouldn't
be a thing. So if you could do us a favor,
like subscribe, follow on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram,
blue sky and YouTube. Yeah, we're on there too and
share with all your friends so we can get out there to more
people. With that being said, thanks for
listening and we'll catch you guys next time.
Somewhere Levi her toes and shakes a little bit.
Little little. Shiver.
All right, so we've established this cannon.
If I put something in my pocket, it becomes invisible.
Noted. Nice.
Edited. Redacted in your head.
In your head. It's good because now I can bow
my nose again there. You go.
In my head, I was thinking of like a one liner where I'm just
a little kid, I'm just a little girl, but I was trying to put a
line where it's like a, well, you call a spoon a spade.
It's a fucking spoon. You stepped up from Come to Poo
in Season 2. There was enough poo in season
1. Yep, Churchill the worm again.
I'm sorry about that. I was the one that suggested
that one. That one was not a great choice.
Yeah, no, that's what I get. I'm asking the questions where
bless you, bless you, bless you. I'm asking the questions to you.
Chuckle fuck. God damn tricky necromantis.
I can't believe he didn't believe he were a Jelly Bean
salesman. Yeah.
Did you? Even have any Jelly beans so.
We have the the the winking ones.
The winking I. Imagine them as the wasted.
The waste. Yeah, trying to get them to eat
a wasted. I was thinking they're more
like. Peeps.
Oh, they're. Peeps Yeah, that's a different
marketing strategy altogether. They should have been more
specific. I apologize.