Greeting Scum, and Welcome to Foil to the Face, a compatible
with Merck Board Actual Play podcast.
My name is Christopher, but you may know me as Cannibal Chris.
I am the primary GM for the World Standard, and I'm a GM
this crap. Hello, I'm Levi.
This is how you're gonna do this.
Every. Every podcast.
Of course. Got no other way.
Hi, I'm Thomas and I am generally Monkey Moto on all the
social platforms. I'm Kevin, and on all the
socials, I am Iron Tusk. Mia Mohokovo, Spanish you.
Was it I didn't catch? Any of that, No oblast thing.
My God. Different what?
He mentioned doing something different.
Oh, do whatever you want. I didn't seriously think the
language. You know.
Yeah, that was wonderful. Anyways, yeah, what do you want?
Socials Vaughn House. Yeah, I can't do that one in
Spanish. There you go.
Levi is Levi boozy, but don't talk to him.
It doesn't matter. Yeah, you can mention him all
you want, he won't respond. Nope.
Nope, I'm not. By the way, my voice is that of
mate. The role of mate on Twitter as
well are most things. And a young boy.
Youngest Oh shit, I am. Oh no.
Are you boys ready for a flail of the face?
So we are going to jump into for our very first episode, we're
going to jump into Trapped Within, which is obviously a
third party adventure written by our good friend Phillip Jensen,
a fellow brother, husband. So we figured who better to kick
off our our show dedicated to 3rd party content than one from
one of our boys? Absolutely.
So without further ado, this is trapped within.
So the five of you have been seized 1 evening as King Fatmu
of Schleswig attempts to rid the city of those he deems
troublemakers. What?
Who are the five of you and what have you done to get locked up?
But what did you What would Fatmu have thought you 2 have
done? That makes sense.
That was tricky. Hello, it's me, Jake.
And I am the desperate farmhand named Paul.
Oh man. I went.
I went fast so many times to it would never have occurred to me.
The yields ever lower, the work ever harder.
The pay what? Get back to work before I thrash
you. Your bed was in the village.
Hope you can afford rent. Meaning opportunistic, prone to
fits, ever reliant on others. So what did you do?
Well, what are you accused of? Why were you thrown into prison?
I have a cynical hatred of land owners.
So I'm a blue collar worker, you know, and I just really hate the
guy that I was working for and I happen to be just smoking a
spliff and that's like that motherfucker right into the
field. It was a dry season.
Ah. All right, so you're justifiably
in prison. May or may not be.
Arson. With a horse involved and never
mind. You stop it.
Just one. OK, well, good.
That's good to know. So Paul the the desperate
farmhand is in prison for farm arson.
Arson. Farcson for that terrible joke.
Nick, you're next. OK.
I am General Cedric Balthazar. Give you some voices later.
I'm not going to. I'm not going to spoil you in
this. But I I'm a I'm a betrayed
phantom. I I died falling on the
battlefield and and my soul began to rot.
Between Earth and the beyond. Something reached out.
You took its bargain and it took your body.
Now you're a shade alive again, half existent.
Your second chance at life has denied you.
And a Wraith. Now where's your skin?
That's the reason I'm here. The.
Murders. I'm looking, yes.
I used to be a. Murderer.
You're looking for your skin suit.
Yes, you're super lucky too that, like as a murderer, they
didn't just kill you, they threw you in prison.
No, no, no. That's uncharacteristically
lenient. This is no this is the
difference. Yeah is that I'm looking for my
body. I think it might be here but I
needed to find a way in. But because I'm a phantom and
semi incorporeal I. Hid inside of an ox that was
getting impounded here with somebody else's cart.
Wait, so. He's not actually imprisoned,
no. Well, I'm sneaking into prison
to find my body. That's cool.
That's. Whoever's wearing your flesh is
imprisoned. Maybe, but that's what I heard.
They might not be. That's but I.
Heard they were here. OK, so.
How are you in the same cell with these guys?
I mean, I could have. Literally just put it along the
ox up. No.
No, no, no. We got pushed to the impound
lot. No.
What? I'm saying is you could impound
that shit. I can travel through wood,
natural stone, or flesh. So if I just like traveled
through here from the impound lot.
I mean, that's like, well, well, that's a good idea on paper,
like in theory, when you see like, what it is, it almost
doesn't really. It will work, sure, but we gotta
like. Twisted and stuff to make it
work. No, I that's that's fine.
But realistically, like I I I feel like I have a purpose to.
I could easily have just transferred myself into a
human's body. Oh, that's what we'll do then.
You can be inside me. It's OK oh all at this.
Oh. Yeah, that's right.
You. Guys.
That's good, that's actually. That's.
Actually, good. OK.
OK.
That's a perfect seg then into who was Levi, Yes.
That's I was thinking, OK, cool, cool, cool.
So on my. On my quest to find my body I I
hear that there there there's a potential that they're inside
this prison and I because I I like I said I am semi
incorporeal and I can choose choose to pass through one of
the following wood, natural stone or flesh.
Which is are you picking flesh? And that's like it's a locked in
choice, isn't it? It's not like you can just kind
of. Talk.
It doesn't. It doesn't say.
If I have to choose one permanently, it's always gonna
be Flesh Band Okay. We'll go with that then because
it does say choose one, It doesn't give you, that's what
the words I was kind of like reading out of.
Yeah, yeah, So. I'm down to this role for it
every day. I mean, I kinda.
I don't hate that D. 3. I don't hate that.
I mean, well today it's. Flesh.
Fair enough. Honestly, Yeah.
If you want to roll that during the, like, the stuff that
happened at the beginning of the day, cool.
I like. I don't really hate that at all.
Yeah. I like.
I like having extra little mechanics sometimes, Yeah, yeah.
Anyway, I chose to smuggle myself.
In through a very strange person, I'm sure.
Salutations board. Oh, here he goes.
I am a cannibal cook named. Fisk Baskins Wait, wait, you say
fist Fisk Fisk Okay Fisk name fish.
That's no. That's much better than fist
fish name Fisk. Sure, Fisk started a successful
food cart in the valley of the unfortunate undead.
He is unreliable, belligerent, has a wooden peg leg.
He likes to bite his fingernails.
Who doesn't? And everyone else's.
No. And he has very, you could say
very predatory gaze towards people.
Like what? He's a creeper.
People don't like the way I stare at them.
Yeah. Like a creeper.
Yeah, would you describe it potentially as staring in manic?
You could say that. Yeah, because the staring, manic
gaze. That's it.
What did you do to end up here? What did he do?
Yeah. What are you at least accused of
doing? I mean, what?
Is your class. I am a cannibal cook.
We. Understand that we understand.
What would they have done? I was.
Collecting food for my cart. Okay.
Yep. That explains it.
I suppose there's some kid, whether it be.
Stale bread, fish or flesh? Yeah, limbs.
Limbs my favorite. Brian's.
And James here. Have some of these chicken
fingers? All right.
I will be playing. We met.
We met.
We met I'm a. Anacone St.
Late in life I saw the truth of the church and my story is still
told as proof of the faith. I literally am a skeleton.
I'm undead. I am charged with the care of a
sacred relic, the Saint Karl's Chaplet of Everlasting Life
beads nihilistic, and I have a staring manic gaze.
So while I'm a skeleton, I'd like to imagine that I still
have eyeballs in my sockets. Oh my Lord.
Never blinking. Never blinking.
I feel like that's kind of the default in that world.
And last but not least, of course, Kevin.
Oh yeah, before you do. We met.
What were you he's done to get thrown into prison?
Basically the fact that other people like to use me as an
example of why faith is so important and the king didn't
like the attention being taken away from him.
Oh. Unjust look, it didn't crucify
you. Complex back story.
He tried. It just didn't take.
Oh. Failed Crucifixion.
That's a great band name. I'm I know how that goes.
That was my one, OK. OK.
And of course, Kevin. I am playing Scoots.
He's the scorched Bedlamite. Kids scream when they see me,
and I tend to scream back at them.
I have one true passion in life, the flickering flame.
Nothing relaxes all the voices in my head like watching people
squirm as they feel my heated love.
Why? That was weird.
It what? Does that mean so?
I feel like it's pretty obvious why you're in prison, but but
very. Predatory.
Animal wrestling? No, I'm actually in prison just
for the fact that for many years I was an executioner's pet.
Like just basically when he wasn't killing anything, he was
taking his anger and. Eventfulness out on me so I'm
covered in like scorched scars. Like you would just just burn me
with scars until eventually I finally escaped, and after being
on the run for who knows how long, I finally got picked up
and was thrown in here to go back to the Executioner's grasp.
Wow. What?
Get serious, why don't you? Well, that's what it says in the
paper. Did you write it?
No, it came up randomly. Random.
OK, those are all pretty randomly terrible people.
Yeah, absolutely. Pretty good.
Yeah, Quite a ragtag group now. Sorry, just before we go any
further, just to let you know, I do have like, my eyes are cinder
filled, so they're like they're just flamed.
Not like allergies, but it's like on fire in my hands.
Are constantly on fire as well so.
Wow. Yeah, that's interesting.
Don't touch me. Yeah, so I can't pick up
anything that's flammable, and I can't read scrolls, but these
hands are on fire. Warm rain wakes you up and your
eyes struggle to focus. The only light is coming from a
guard's head, which seems to flicker as he shakes his body,
effectively stopping the foul smelling shower.
A poster, a bed, rusty iron bars each other and darkness is all
that surrounds you. The deafening silence is sliced
apart by a frail voice coming from the cell next to you.
Hey you guys, you see a hand out in front the cell that you guys
are in. And you guys are all crammed
into this cell with with one bunk, a skeleton.
But I ran a dude and a guy on fire.
I'm here. I'm a ghost.
You had a ghost. Yeah.
You were in a tiny rock cave, a smell of sulfur.
The rusted bars in front of you, obviously.
You you picturing, you're accurately picturing what this
room is. Yeah.
Yeah, the poster on the wall from a play of some sorts is Fat
Moves. Redemption.
What the fuck, Joe's? Two guys sitting on top of the
prison. The bed looks like if two of you
were to get in it together it would shatter and chamber pot in
the corner, reeking almost as much as this.
The hand that you see out in front of the bars, which is
clearly well, you can barely see if you can probably see it in
the flickering of of scoots like that's what you see or hear.
So there's a poster of Fat Move on one of the walls.
Yep, Yep, on the back wall. Of the cell I'm gonna walk up
and I'm just gonna. Touch the poster and burn it.
Okay. Not a fan.
And as it burns up, you see that
there is a hole behind it, A narrow hole looks like.
Obviously it disappears in the darkness, but it looks big
enough to crawl. Through I fucking knew.
But barely bigger. Okay, Surprised at what I see.
I'm just gonna kind of look around.
Don't necessarily know any of these guys.
And just kind of stand in front of it and try to kind of hide
it, but not necessarily cross my arms because I don't want to
scar myself up anymore, but just kind of like Ricky.
Bobby, Yeah. I don't know what to do with my
hands. I think that's the voice, damn
it, all right? And just kind of stand there
kind of in front of it and just kind of see what's going on with
the with the hand coming through the bars as well and see what
everyone else is doing. Judging by what you're seeing
with the hand, it looks like it's somebody in the next cell
over trying to wave at you guys. I'm going to stand up from the
shitting pod. You're on it.
And. Is that why it's also there?
Yeah. This currently.
I'm going to walk up to fucking scooter here.
Oh no. What?
What you found there buddy? Oh no.
Well, don't necessarily rightfully know what I found by
back behind me that. There's poster there and the
touched it and then now it's gone.
Nothing. Let's see here.
What are you doing? I'm.
Gonna, I'm gonna peer over, scoot shoulder and looking at
the hole. What'd you find there?
Flashlight. Oh, Oh yeah, that, that that was
behind the poster hole in the wall.
Why do we all sound like we're cousins?
I have found myself in the wrong place.
Who the fuck? Was saying and then I.
Slowly, like like like Dracula fucking come out like phase out
of like the under my spot. Oh, wow.
I slowly phase out of. My laying body.
Yes, you're laying. Body bed.
But you're the one, yeah, So Fisk is on the bunk, and then
you undertake your rolls out of them.
That's pretty. Dumb Scoots is gullible.
That's one of the bad traits that he pulled up.
So this is just going to be like his soul is just reason out of
this bot. What?
And I'm going to start making for the hole you're?
Going to crawl into the. Hole I'm going to crawl into the
hole I I. Give me an agility test, oh
DR14, first roll of the game. Oh, that's a 17 on the die.
Damn. Very nice.
Very. Good right away?
Sure. So you crawl through this, this
little earthen tunnel, and it takes a a gentle curve to the
left, and you see on the other end of this a room.
And when you smell this room before you see it, you barely
lit by two torches in this foul rotting stench of dead bodies.
You see in one corner a hulking, orkish executioner who seems to
be working on something. I don't know.
You see he's got giant ears, and you see the hair sticking out of
them as you look around the room and you're like, what's he
working on? Where is this place?
You see a torture rack on one of the walls, and you see that the
arms and legs are still chained in there, but there's no torso
left. Does this executioner look
familiar like the one I may have escaped from?
Boy, complex backs of it. No, that's a good question.
Give me a D2. On A2, he's you, recognize him.
On A1 you've never seen him before.
Ah, my. Favorite.
Yeah, right. Let it leave a chance.
I know him. You know, recognize him.
You know this executioner as gizmo.
Gizmo. Yeah.
And you know, this guy is sadistic as fun.
I mean, he delights and others pains.
He wants to be left alone. And you know this.
He works solitarily. And you know that he's better
left avoided, but you also. Seeing Gizmo, I'm going to
Scoots. Back.
Into the room. All right, sounds good.
That was a weird thing I just witnessed.
Yeah, you eventually saw him go into there and then come back.
He got real dark and then bright again.
Is there no other light source in this cell?
No, no, it's pretty. I mean, there is a red glow kind
of coming out from like the outside of your bars.
There's obviously like a common area between other cells and you
can see vaguely across. If you were to look out
yourself, you would see that there are three cells across
this large elevator platform in the center of this room and
there's like this red glow kind of coming from below it and this
smell of sulfur and a lot of shit too.
Cuz chamber thoughts Well. I eat a lot of grain.
High Court diet. High fiber diet.
So bad girl for your Human Torch that.
Wasn't so good back there. I I no, I'd take my chances in
here with you. Spooky fucking chamber pot boy
and bone fella. What about me?
You weren't even awake when I left.
You're inconsequential. I look over to the other side,
where the hands waving. Yeah, What's your story?
Who me? You're talking to me now?
Ask you guys a question and you guys just gonna did your own
thing. Yeah, we did.
Now you could just answer our question.
Yeah, I know that's fair. My name is Anuk Schlager.
I you know, I'm trying to get the fuck out of here.
I think if we work together, that might be a possibility.
You know, a thing or two that might help us.
Maybe. You got one of these mysterious
holes too in your sale. Like the one that's like, it's
about big enough for your. Yeah, no, I don't have one of
those. Oversized Glory Hole 4
Undersized. I'm sure you don't want to rind
out. It's on the other.
Shark I. Kind of do.
Well, Nuke, what's your idea? Well, give me a D8.
I. Guess Throw three times.
That's unfair. That's.
Four on the die. That's the right question.
You know an entrance. It might not be an exit.
I don't really know if that helps you at all, but.
Not a little beast. Oh well, you figured out.
I'd like I know your name. How is it that you could have
been down here for so long and not have any way out?
Oh, you know. I forget for the most part.
I mean, it's all hazy. Yes, you do seem quite useful.
Principal Chris. Principal.
Chris. Are there bed sheets?
No, there is underneath Fisk here.
He's kind of there is a jumble of bed sheets on this bed.
I did not pee while pooping, so I'm going to pee on some bed
sheets and try to do the fucking.
Yeah, I love it. But the thing that was that it
was supposed to be soap. Wasn't it?
I think that was the thing in the movie.
Was it? That it was silk.
Why would they put silk? Why are you pissing on my
bedsheet? I gotta well, for one, gotta
pee. For two, I gotta get out of
here. I'm claustrophobic and I got
some fields to burn. As you pull this bed sheet off,
like pulling it off them right? Oh yeah, well, he's still kind
of laying there. I'm just pulling it out from
under while pissing on it. Give me a D4.
OK. Oh no. 3/3 As you do that, as
you pull this bed sheet, a knife clangs to the floor.
A dull, rusty knife. I'm gonna pick that some bitch
up. Oh, and let it be known, you
guys obviously aren't carrying any of the equipment on your
equipment sheets, yeah. Damn it.
I will say though, in retrospect.
If you wanted to smuggle something in her head.
Keister. You want a keister something?
Yeah. You can give me retroactively,
Dr. 12 presence test to have snuck something in when you were
getting locked up. I would have had to make the
Cannibal cook keister. You were the one on that, didn't
you? Yeah.
All right, we. Do that.
Does my butt explode? No, I want.
To see that it just. Failed.
No, it's. Already you couldn't break the
roof potentially days ago. There's no like way that the
effect would probably still have.
Unfortunately I wasn't able to keys to my Wellington's.
Why it failed so hard? That's very hard to do.
I'm going to. I'm going to have tried to make
the cannibal cook for me. Ohh keister of ball team hammer.
Then are you trying to keister something as well?
OKI mean, I got. You don't have to put it in your
ass. I mean, I got a 10 foot wooden
pole. OK, so there are certain things
where it's like, I'm gonna sneak this in, I'm gonna say, well,
that's gonna raise the Dr. a lot higher, and you have to justify
how you're possibly doing that. I mean, I could have his his
hammer in my waistband. You monster.
I want. I want my broad axe.
God. Yeah, your.
Broad axe in your waistband, I mean.
Chris, I'm gonna say you did say you were very specific about
smuggling, not Keister in this world.
And I think I thought right away he's like Broad Axe.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know we did. You're right.
OK. Well, OK.
So I want to say it's. Under my apron.
DR12 Presence for for hiding the ball peen hammer, but for hiding
a broad axe under your apron. That's like, I'm just gonna call
that like a six. Eighteen's pretty high, but.
How wait, how big is a broad axe?
Yeah, how big is this broad axe? Look, give me.
Like my check broad? No.
Covered by my apron. You know what?
That makes a lot of sense, I guess.
How much it'd be harder. All the 14 not only make it too
much harder. How much damage?
Does it do? D6.
Okay. So it is like a bigger, a little
bit bigger weapon, so. 16 feels right.
What do you think? Can you do it?
Do you think you can do it? Let's find out.
That's a 17 I got. It.
Geez. I get the.
Feeling they didn't frisk you very well.
Yeah, they did not give a fuck. They just grabbed you by their
shoulders and tossed you in a wagon probably.
Let me see if I could smuggle in his hammer for him.
Yeah, I'll also 17 in one. Yeah, nice rated.
Die. What's my one?
Your presence plus one. So it's actually higher than
that. Yeah.
Nice. All right, well, never mind.
All right. What about you two guys?
We smuggled in the sacred relic that he's been charged with
taking care of, which was the string of beads.
So yeah, they're basically anal beads now.
So okay. So since that's such a sound
explanation, no way they're gonna find.
Yeah, no tests. Not only that.
Like what it is is your holy relic.
Your character's built around this.
There's no way you're not gonna smuggle that and be successful,
right? And the best part about it is
I'm still a skeleton, so it's just like a.
Rattling around in your waist. Yeah, so they're just like
rattling around as I walk. All this has a rosary in it.
Belly chain. I didn't seem so innocuous.
I imagine they just didn't take it.
That's wonderful. About you, Scoots.
So what's that? How?
Do you smuggle anything with these hands?
Hold on to hide this. OK, so Scoots has a necrotic
hole in his leg that whistles when he walks.
So if I could I would like to hide this crowbar that I have in
my leg through this necrotic. Hole dude.
It's like RoboCop with his thighs.
I. Was the other day.
And then possibly, like like seal it with my my burning hand,
just you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just that's a. Good.
Explanation. I don't want to make you roll
for that either. Okay.
Well I rolled a natural 20 anyways either way.
So don't worry. About it.
All right, so excellent. So 4th forwarding back into the
back to the present. I rolled A3 on that D4.
Oh, yes, that was the rusty knife.
Yep. Oh.
Yeah, OK. I just needed to remember what
the hell the weapon was. Oh, did you sluggle something
and I can't? Remember.
No, I got a natural one. That's right.
Oh. Yeah.
That's right, the Wellingtons. OK, so while you made-up for it
by finding a knife, Yeah, I guess nobody's claimed.
It's just on the floor. It clanged.
What? Is it for D?
4D four Yeah, the dull rusty knife.
All right, finished pissing on that sheet there, and we'll
twist it around with this. And I pulled my broad axe.
The leverage? That's wrong.
With you people. That's actually.
Clever. All right, I'm gonna take this
piss sheet and fucking wrap them around the bars and I'm.
I have my. Way out of here.
Yeah, I'm gonna twist it around. Okay.
That's such a good idea. I just wanna say that you guys
do that and you start twisting and you hear the bars groaning
and they're rusty and. You could probably have given
them a swift kick even, but this definitely works.
And then they bring them right out of like the where they're
set into the stone. It just crumbles out of there.
And those two bars that you were pinning together, they just
crumble and fall. Beautiful.
That went better than expected. Smooth black butter.
You ever think of that, you weird old bastard?
Pissing on shit? No, no, that never really
occurred to me. Now do me.
He's standing. He's in the cell next to you.
I give it a kick. And then, yeah, the crumble and
fall. And no, yeah, that definitely
worked. How long?
Is this? Guy retract.
You see him too. You see that This guy is is so
frail and disgusting. It looks like his skin is
constantly moving as you guys get closer.
The the ambient lighting of the the Red and and of Scoots.
Yeah, the Human Torch. You look like a bag of bird
bones filled with maggots. Covered in maggots.
Look and you as he gets closer. You see, yeah, this guy is like
crawling with maggots endlessly. Damn.
You are absolutely disgusting. Damn, I fucking called you out,
boy. You did, Yeah.
You nailed him on the head or hit the nail on the head.
Made it nail. Just nailed in my head.
Well, mites. I do have a hamper.
So as they're doing the whole ripping the bars off and talking
to this guy, I'm gonna actually pick the necrotic scab that I
cauterized with my hand. Off.
So I can pull the crowbar out of my leg and then cauterize it
again. Just unzip it and zip it back up
again. Why did that sound like Velcro?
It's a gift kind of case. I can tell.
Can you add that sound? Just no.
Or even better, it's like just pull it back just enough to pull
it out and then just seal it back over instead of pulling the
whole scab off, yeah? Just the flap.
He's the. Ghost dude, All right.
Old. Timer.
Yo-yo, what's the way? Shit, come on, you've got to be.
Where's the supplies at? Supplies.
I need my pole I. Don't know what you're talking
about. Supplies.
Kitchen. You mean you haven't thought
this far ahead? What?
You mean you haven't thought this far?
You didn't think you're gonna get out of here?
No, no, no. You're like the 15th person I've
asked, but I remember, so there's probably a lot more.
I'm not looking to get out of here anyway.
You're not, no. What are you?
Like you work here. I haven't seen you around.
As you can probably tell from the fact that you can see, what
is your name, boy? Oh, what?
What's your name, boy? I'm Paul.
As you can tell, and I kind of just scoot over, you can see him
through me. Didn't notice.
Yeah, well, now you can. How's all that gloss in your
eye? Or yeah, the shards of glass
that are in your eyes. Let's cataracts.
Regardless. You're very foggy.
I'm here to find my body. Well, you can follow us while
this maggot covered Cake over here shows us the way out.
I might as well. Yeah, yeah.
No, that's a good idea. You know, we might want to get a
little move on, though. The guards come around here, oh,
like twice an hour clockwork, but it seems like happens twice
an hour. What?
No. Yeah, well, it happens so
frequently it's hard to forget it.
That's a lot of things. Suspect that.
Makes so much sense, though, Doug.
Like if he's an Alzheimer's patient, like constantly
reminding him of this thing will keep him keep it fresh.
So yeah, this again. So we Met's gonna walk.
Out through the hole that we created, Stepping over the
puddle that was probably like ripped out from all the clothing
being run out. Yeah, yeah, puddle and looking
at the anak and just add. Which way do these guards come
from? Over there and he points to the
north. And to give you a little bit of
a SIT Rep now that you guys are in this prison ward proper, this
is a large rock opening. It reeks again of sulfur and
it's clearly coming from below and in the center of that room,
in this room, you see that there is like an elevator or a lift
rather in the floor and it's connected to a chain which is up
to a pulley, goes to the ceiling and then the chain disappears
down that corridor or that tunnel to the north.
Above that tunnel opening is a large statue of fat move looking
down at you. You guys came from, I guess what
would be the east? There's three cells there.
The one that you guys were collectively huddled in with
northeast corner of that of this ward.
A nuke was in the central eastern one, and then there was
one beyond him as well on the other side of his cell from
yours. That makes sense.
Yeah. Yeah, Okay.
And then along the South cell, you see that there are three
more, or the South wall of this ward, there are three more
cells. And along the W wall there are
three more as well. You do see in the West cells,
each one of them contains A prisoner and all three of them
are kind of just sitting on their bunks.
They're not really giving you guys a whole lot of attention.
They're kind of just hard to tell if they're even awake or
alive or what. But and then in the South, you
see that that's pretty much the case for one of them.
The other two are completely empty from what it looks like.
Right when it's then gonna grab one of the bars that we've
broken free and it's makeshift club for now.
There you go, that's. Very smart, yeah.
I'll call that a D4 damage for like an improvised weapon.
Nice. All right.
Very good. Right.
So I guess we just choose a way and start going.
I mean, there's really only one way out of this room that's not
into another cell. So I.
Guess. Lead the way, old man.
All right. Well, let's go.
And as he starts leading the way, you see a light coming down
from that corridor to the north, and somebody gives me a D4.
Anybody. Prepare yourselves, gentlemen.
Do it to Tom. Go for it, Tom.
We got a one. A1 You see a single guard.
Good. Good.
Yeah, right. And you see he's familiarly a
Wick head, but he seems different.
Does he look wealthy? Is that what's different?
No. OK, why do you care?
You'll find out tearing a knife, but you see that his other arm
is 3 times longer than it should be and it's just kind of
tentacle. Nearly what the yeah.
There's poor unfortunate soul. Why don't you go over there and
spook him, get him out of here? At this point, he's right on you
guys. He sees you and you just hear
this voice, this the voice you've never really heard one of
these guys talk necessarily or maybe you have yells out to you
guys. No.
And I stab him in the neck, OK. Let's roll initiative, yeah?
OK. I just want to do the whole like
just a D6, you know? Is that what you guys want to do
or you guys want to do? OK.
It's just it's so much quicker, yeah.
Absolutely. Who wants to roll?
Anybody. I'll roll, I'll do it.
Oh, I got a four. A four.
That's wonderful. I do, you guys.
So you said you're stabbing him in the.
Neck. Stab him in the neck.
We'll let it open with that, then go for that role.
Give me a Dr. 12 strength. It's a 5.
It's a five. Yeah.
How many women you have One.
You have one. You wanna use it?
Nah. Okay, moving on to the next guy
who wants to do something else. This.
Yeah, So Paul goes this as he lunges at him with this knife.
He just really misjudges his distance and lunges short.
Like way too short. Like 2 feet too short.
It just looks awkward. Yeah, however.
You can end up here like that. All right.
And you're gonna wind up this, this rusty bar and taking a
swing, gonna knock the piss out of him, all right?
You get our 12 strength. Nope.
No, it's. Okay, yeah.
Yeah, just. He sees you coming, and as you
make this wide archy swing, he ducks underneath it.
Three of you left. Seeing both Paul and I didn't
get Tom's fricking. Mom.
Bat. Weemit.
Weemit.
Yeah. Weemit.
I'm seeing Paul and Weemit. Miss.
I'm gonna go ahead and just grab him and just punch him right in
his Lantern head. Being as my character Scott
Finger licking fire, it says your gnarled hands are
constantly wreathed and fire deal D 4 + 2 unarmed damage, one
in six chance of enemy Catching Fire dealing D4 damage the next
round as well. And then I can't hold anything
Flamboy no scroll, so I'm just going to grab him by whatever
color he's got and I'm just going to try to bash in the
Lantern head he's got, OK. Sounds good.
So give me that deer 12 strength.
That's nineteen of the die and the plus one.
That's 20 dirty. Okay.
Give me a D6 as well in the rest of all that.
Okay, so D6 first. Yep, Yep.
This is. HP.
That's a 5A. Five Okay.
And so it's a D 4 + 2. So that's three okay.
And then I got a one in six chance that he's on fire.
All right, so he. Is not.
Okay. Very good.
So, yeah. He punch his glass face because
these guys are essentially a Lantern for a head and you
shatter the glass, but it's you spider web the glass and he
doesn't go down, but you see in the knees buckle from the pane.
That hurts. Pane.
I'll give you the window pane. All.
Right, that's Cedric and Fisk because still get to act.
General about facility, whatever.
Here you go, ghost. A boy and I just drop his hammer
on the ground. I'm.
I'm just going to stay propped up over here.
You could have had this with me. I guess that's not exactly
obvious, but. You literally came out of my
body. You released body released.
Body relaxed, body oh. My God said when he was going
into him, yeah. Hell with it.
I guess we're going to leave this place more piss filled than
we started. And I grabbed the I grabbed the
hammer and I just fucking swinging at this dude's bladder.
No. Wow.
Geez. We.
Are 12 strength and. Then right.
What a Dick. Move almost literally.
Oh yeah, baby, that's a 19. Oh, very good.
OK, give me damage. Yeah, it's only a D4, so we'll
see. Right there, that is a four
baby. 4. Nice, this is.
These things are so hard to read.
Why did I paint them this way? I don't know.
God. So dumb, but yeah, you get them
square in the bladder and right. Like what?
Exactly where you're aiming and you just see his robes.
I guess he's wearing and just darkened.
That was over in pain. And this weird whale.
That's nasty. He's not dead, but I will say
he's on death's door. It is just oh, you guess what?
You dropped the hammer for him. That was his turn.
Now somebody give me a D6. Let me know what it is.
I'm playing to my strengths here.
I'll roll it a six. Okay, he runs.
He just. Tale and just books it down the
way he came, which as you guys, you guys are kind of in the
opening of this cavern out of this ward, right?
And you can see that it does go left and right.
And the weird thing is though you guys are still in the ward,
right? You guys have this little.
May lay in the war because he kind of breached out into this
room and breached and he just counted wrong.
And yeah, he ran back into the tunnel and he saw that he took a
quick left. Looks like I scared the piss out
of him. You know, just for that.
I'd say so. Odd.
Well, which way there, Anik? Well, I heard once I'm kind of
law. Don't even say it.
We know the law. I know the kitchen is that way.
That's probably where he went. Probably hungry.
I'd like some cabbage. Follow me into the bride.
I had a ride. You pass.
OK, so as actually as you guys get into this little this
pathway here, you notice it's tall, it's breezy, and there's
like this subtle scratching sound coming from the walls as
you guys are in this, there's a strange darkness in here.
Now here's something I'm very confused about.
OK, so you have the ever burning hands and stuff right there.
Yes, I do. This darkness in here, it's very
weird. The ceilings are lined with
geodes and you can see these geodes that as you guys are
talking, as you guys are walking in there, you see that it's as
if like when the sound waves hit these geodes, they emit a flash
of light. But it also says flames entering
this space are instantly extinguished into a puff of red
smoke. Now does that apply to your
room? Not.
You're. Probably burning for the time
that he's in there, that's. What there's time in.
Forever right, I would assume. Wild.
No. The only reason that makes me
like, oh, what is it this or this is because that class that
he's playing is in this book, right?
Guys go together as like, hey, this is the thing that like
makes it through these things that turns flame off or it is it
or is it also one that gets turned off as well?
I. Also idea.
What's the description ever burning?
It is my gnarled hands are consistently wreathed in flames.
So. Consistently reads in flame.
OK, here's a question then. Consistently.
In other words, they they don't turn off.
Right, I was just actually. Here's the question then.
Is there a mechanic inside of this area for any reason that
would be advantageous for him to have flaming hands?
Because I feel like then it would make sense, especially I
mean it keeps you losing visibility.
Well that's. Kind of.
The only thing I'm seeing is like, what are you losing by
losing? That.
Pretty. Much I thought it could be
either. Way.
Yeah, I'll actually let you decide then considering it's
your character and the flaming hands is kind of your situation.
Is that something that? As you enter this room, do your
hands go out as well? Well, if it says that any flames
are extinguished, yeah, I would say they would.
But would they reignite after leaving this area?
I would assume the. Same, I would assume.
So yeah, it's like almost like a like a like a damper.
Yeah, like, OK, does it eat? In here.
OK, so my my eyes glow as well. So then my eyes would would
extinguish, my hands would extinguish, and then I just
have. Your Dick while peeing now?
Yeah. Masturbated so many years.
Please give me a minute. Now my Dick is the only thing
burning so. I need to go back to the cell
and then immediately look nice again.
We all know he's a fire crotch. It's.
All the same, brother. Anyways, so yes, getting back to
it, I would say probably they would extinguish as we're
getting into this area, but probably reignite when leaving.
That's perfect. I like that.
OK, so also you moving on then the walls in these in this
pathway are pocketed with these fist sized holes.
You also see that that chain that was coming from the
elevator comes down against the, the northern wall of this
pathway. This pathway runs essentially
east to West, but you came out into the from the South into the
center of it. You know what I mean?
OK, OK. I think that's clear.
So like AT. Section to it then.
Yeah, absolutely. Yep.
OK. Has this fire come back already
at this point? Well, you guys are currently in
this thing, I would say that. Still.
Geodes and stuff. Yep, Yep, this entire pathway.
OK And actually at the West End of this, you see a wooden door.
And on the East End of this, a heavy iron door.
Also you notice there's this strange flickering purple, hazy
white emitting from this super quick and rabbit of some sort.
It keeps seems to be jumping from hole to hole in those weird
fist sized holes. What the hell?
A rabbit? It's a cabbage rabbit.
Seems like. I hate Cabots.
Look that right. Boy that turned off, he's got a
crowbar. He could open that big old iron
door. Speaking of, that does seem
quite familiar. Why is it that you are on fire?
I don't know. It's been such a long time since
I've been on fire. I don't remember a time when I
haven't been. This is the first time I've
actually seen my gnarled ass. These are terrible.
My God, these are God awful. You.
Could really use a manicure. Maybe some lotion?
I have something I don't know. Anyways, there's a cabbage
rabbit. Someone says I'm not sorry, I'm
just focused on the fact that I'm not on fire at the moment.
I'm just curious, you're not touched by the sudden child, are
you? Not that I'm aware of, but I
mean. The executioner just kept, He
just kept me. I don't know, I just kept.
He just had me on lighting stuff on fire.
Oh, start the stove and, you know, go and start the the
fireplace and burn that guy to the ground.
Yeah, I just, I just constantly been on fire.
I haven't. I don't remember a time when I
wasn't. But he actually asked you to
burn a guy to the ground? I turned backs.
It's pretty dope. Why are you speaking?
What? That's what I thought.
I wasn't hearing anything either.
I checked out after Knocked Sun things.
What? I need to know now where are we
going. I can, generally speaking, I can
use you people let. Me give you a D6.
I'll roll one. Do it, Paul.
There. You go.
Refuses to use it. Two.
Okay. Carry on.
Fuck. Well, we maybe we should chase
that white rabbit over there, you know?
And I kinda. You know what I'm saying?
What the fuck was that? I know what she's talking about.
I'm in brother. I reach up for a high 5.
Okay then, and I start nibbling on his fingernails.
He just he high fives, grabs the hand and folds it in.
Yeah, I appreciate the sustenance.
Let go, please, before I stab you in the neck.
It's like baby fish, you obviously.
Oh my God. To.
My character, I fucking bite fingernails.
I'm. Gonna tell you right now, dog,
you are just. You are the best of us.
Holy shit. Oh, sorry, I usually ask
permission first, but this didn't seem like the case.
Yeah, you know what? I'm gonna.
I'm just gonna boot him right in the gut and kick him off me the.
Fuck are you guys doing? He's fucking knock.
He. Won't stop touching my hands and
sucking on my fingers. I think they're flirting.
It's weird. You gotta don't put hand.
And. Don't put your hands in places
that you don't know. And as he does that he puts his
hand into one of these holes. Something Give me a D4 and a D8.
Oh my God, fuck that. I'm hanging out with the
skeleton. I got a 2.
You got two? Okay.
I got a three. All right, so three.
That is how much hit points a nuke has.
No. And two, that is how much damage
he pulls his hands back with a fucking stump.
But when those goddamn rabbits spit my hand off, fuck.
Well, yeah, looks you got a bunch of little damage hands
going on. What does that mean?
You're bleeding. Fucking wrinkled.
Can I even do? I could still bleed.
You flaming. What's your name?
What's? What the fuck are your name?
Scoots. His name was He said it.
Yeah, what he said. Turn your turn your fire back
on. I would.
Come on, flame on now. I'd say I wish I could, but
frankly, it's the first time I've seen my hands and they they
they look God awful. I mean, not nearly.
There, Robin. Don't you know his bleeding
stuff of an arm? Literally rub it in.
But you literally rub it in. That's what I mean.
I didn't mean like you're adding insult to.
So we've we've it's gonna walk over to Scoots and just like
slap him in the face a little bit, just.
Turn it back on. OK.
He's. Swing from his non man, yeah.
He's. He kind of forgets it's not
there and he would have got your right in the cheekbone.
No, it's just. Fandom wrist syndrome.
Yeah, he got the bad Flint totally done immediately, too.
I I wish I could. There's nothing I didn't do
that. I didn't choose this.
I mean, I did. I'd say it's nice to see my
hands, but I'd rather see the flames.
These are fucking terrible. Can we get the fuck out of here?
This is. I don't want to be in this place
no more. There's rabbits eating fucking
hands and you guys are baking about like.
People who bicker about or what can we go?
Yeah, I'm pretty much already over this incident.
Let's go. Yeah.
And as he's walking to, you see that Megan's are constantly
falling off of him, but as they do, they're just like racing to
catch up with him again. Oh, weird, that's.
Awesome as we walks by the the hole that took his hand.
Like I'm gonna jam my bar in there to see if I could, like
either hit the rabbit or maybe recover his hand.
I like that. Okay.
Give me a D62A2 perfect, and then give me an HM.
You're trying to catch the rabbit, essentially, with the
stick, right? I'm trying to hit the rabbit or
hit. The rabbit.
Or at least knock it so I can get the hand back and throw it
at Anna. Okay, give me I guess agility.
You're trying to get the hand out of there, Okay.
So yeah, the hand, it's confusing because there is
something in there. But is that hand still in there?
That's the question. So I got yeah, no, you know
what? I mean, like, it's rare.
Oh boy. Okay, Give me, I guess, an
agility test. We'll call it Dr. 16.
Yeah, that's no, I got a three. Okay you.
You did find some mass of some sort as you poked it in there
and you pull it out and you skewered his hand, just because
it's probably so soft and squishy, yeah.
So it's like I'm gonna just hold it out like a carrot on a stick
towards him. Here you go.
He winds his wrist back up with the where it should go.
He's like, preach. That looks awfully delectable
when I swipe the hand. Yeah, I wouldn't.
You swiped the hand. Yeah.
I swiped his hand. God, he gotta be.
It's probably way easier to be quicker than Nuke.
So yeah, as he does that, he's got this hand connected to it
and you see that it's starting to like the Megans are crawling
the gap. I was that's what I saw.
Too in my mind. Right, Yeah.
You grab it quick and snatch it and that whole connection starts
to come up on the part. Like nanobots or something.
Yeah, yeah, he's bloodshot. A decrepit Tony Stark.
I'm just gonna turn with my eyeballs still and just slowly
look at. Fisk like.
I do the same. Mouth open.
Yeah, I know, right? What a Dick.
There's back, but it's so creepy.
Are you a human? He's a skeleton.
Technically, yes, yeah. I just have eyeballs in my
sockets, so. So my predatory gaze unsettles
all creatures. So humans role reaction at minus
two. Your morale process too.
You don't like it? My eyes are kind of staring at
your neck cuz I just linger at all the wrong places.
Wow, what about a skeleton's neck is like?
Right, Yeah. It is unnerving.
Eyes are here, buddy. Yeah, your neck's right.
There. I hope they're not looking at
me. Am I staring through?
You you might be. You guys are really weird.
Don't lump me in with these weirdos.
I'm gonna be at the wooden door trying to pry it open with my
knife. Oh.
The wonderful. Yeah.
I was gonna say, as this whole interaction is going, I see Paul
by the door, jamming the door open with the knife and I was
like, I got the scroll bar, Let's see what we can do.
Thanks brother. You guys well OK.
You guys, you're. Pry barring the door open.
Yeah, I mean, I suppose we could check to see if the door is
unlocked, but what's? The fun thing to say?
Planting the crowbar and you're like, well, let me check. 1st.
Always there, sweating. So the door opens and the room
in the other side is spacious. It's dim and it's.
Filled with humid air and the stench of cooking.
Awful like it's it smells like someone is just like ground up
some bodies and then just threw to the frying pan.
I. Smells like my kind of place I
was. Like saying.
Something this would have a heart boner or as soon as he
walked in here. Oh, I'm hard as a Rock You.
Probably recognize that smell too.
Actually, why don't I need 3D fours?
So anybody feel free as you guys are looking around this room
too, rolling dice? You see that there's a human
corpse skewered in the middle of the room like a kebab, I'll.
Do one. A chef is behind a cooking
island minding. His own business looks terrible,
and a statue of Fat Moo is draped in drying meat.
Like he's like she's just hanging her laundry on.
Your statue, but drying meat Not long I was wearing.
I rolled the Ohh. Go ahead, I said.
I rolled the two. Okay, so I got a 2.
I got a three. 3. I'll do one.
And a four. And a four A, 2A3 and A4.
Okay. So you do see in this room that
a prisoner is, and he's very clearly a prisoner, judging by
his lack of clothing and shackles around his feet.
You see that he's force feeding the guard.
What he's force feeding him with what he's force feeding him is
hard to say. It's everything is just this
bloody, slimy pile of food. You also you smell like this.
What's cooking? But.
What the rocket's cooking? Yes.
That's where I was. Going smells of people's elbow
in here. God.
Fuck. Pretty sure we've hit rock
bottom. Quick question, are there the
geodes that are in the hallway? Are they in this room as well?
Fantastic question cuz as you enter this room as well, you
immediately ignite again. There you go.
Yeah, great question. Missed details of seem very
important. Hey there, you.
Are you see that this due to this chef is tending to
something in like an oven of sort?
Does he take any notice of us walking in?
He doesn't seem to give a shit. No, like you guys with that,
with his lack of reaction, you could assume that he's used to
people kind of walking in and out of here.
This is clearly like the cafeteria.
Is he like, bent over looking into this oven?
Yes. I'm kicking him.
You're kicking him, you son of a.
You son of a bitch. I love it.
I'm gonna have you give me, I guess, a strength.
Just a plain old strength test. OK. 15 -, 1 so 14.
Oh, nice. You kick him and he, Louie
doesn't realize you're there, but he he goes kind of head
first into the oven and you see, what he's got there is this
strange kind of thick, red, stretchy casserole.
But as you do this, you see it opens up and these tentacles and
isn't. And you when you kick him, his
body just goes directly into it and it just devours him.
Shut the shut the oven just. OK yeah.
And then yeah, shut the oven and the rest of you guys all see
this happen. Oh, that was fucking.
Weird. That is quite quickly.
Oh again, I was gonna eat that. How much of that do you think is
human? None of it.
Unfortunate. Look at it.
Do humans act like that? That's like a lasagna at best, I
mean. Like, maybe No.
I mean, like, maybe this Stew or whatever's hanging up on that
statue. Oh, likely all of it, Yeah.
Oh wonderful. And I just go.
Especially that guy. I start.
I'll start pulling some of the stuff out the statue and start
eating a little bit. But you're into people, huh?
Oh. Yes, yes, absolutely.
I'm not so secret cannibal. I think This is why.
Me too. The weird one and I got along.
A ghost eating. Flesh.
Yeah. What does that do?
It's like the the it's like. Casper.
Yeah. Casper.
Yeah, just falling through under the ground.
Yeah, I'll chewed up. Sloppy.
Regardless of all the things that we've been doing here, I
could probably take a break. Yeah, me too.
The dog's barking. Welcome back to first of all
Faces Now last we left you guys we'll.
Figure that out. Too old habits?
We met. We let just kicked the chef into
the cook, into the oven. It was eaten by lasagna.
Hard to say what that is. Lasagna.
That's his name.
Lasagna. Yeah, that's gonna.
Work. And as we come back, you see
Schlager just lovingly spoon feeding his maggots to some this
plate of food he found. Just like he's like their pets.
Like there is. Like, that's this whole world.
And he's like in his own world, too.
As he's doing it, You're bliss on his face.
Hey partner, can you cup your detached hand here so I can
scoop up some of this soup? Soup.
There's an old guy named Soup. There's a hole through that
hand. Stop it.
Yeah, no, I know this doesn't really work.
I mean, you can try. Look, it's yours at this point.
I still have it actually. I do.
Yep. Yeah, I just throw the hand.
Back over my shoulder to him and I grabbed the ladle.
Well, do a soup. That was a weird interaction.
I feel like. I want two dudes with.
Crazy eyes staring at each other.
Both right I. Feel like it's fine for every
interaction, interpersonal, whatever interaction, just to be
nonsense, awkward, and weird. All these dudes are just
batshits. Yeah.
Fucking stain. Yeah, I feel like Paul, just by
default is just a normal guy with jeans and shit.
Overalls and a yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're getting it. He's your.
Boy. Yeah, your.
Boy Paul. Look at this move please, boy.
Well, you guys figure out what's in that oven there, I'm gonna go
nibble on those toe beans over there, number one.
Yuck. #2 It's a chef or cook. I'm a cook.
Now the current name right now would be He is cooked.
Yes. Bazinka.
And that strung up body, I'm just gonna start nibbling on the
toast. The skewered body.
Yeah, yeah, it's freshly cooked. I mean, it's not freshly cooked.
Does it make sense? It's freshly fresh?
It's well cooked, so. Not like well done.
It's like a medium rare. It's kind of how you want it.
Just the way I like it burned to a crisp.
Okay, that's not great. So as they're all doing this,
there's another exit out of this room, right?
Okay, I was trying to get. Yeah, you're.
Ready. Thank you.
Very much, yes. Two of the you guys came in from
the South, right? Okay, this is a rectangular room
on the West. There is a pretty frail door,
narrower than the doors you pass through.
And on the N wall there is a door that matches the one you
came through, a wooden door. Can I go to the frail door and
kind of kick it open and see what's going on in there?
Yeah, move the door open. It's cool in here.
It's dry. It's surprisingly well
ventilated. Lots of meats and questionable
liquids. Sitting jars, heavily mutilated.
Body, abdomen wide open with mushrooms growing from the
abdomen cavity. And you see that there's the one
and it it grabs your attention because of the noise it's
making. But there is a small goblin
trapped in a bottle, and it looks as though it's trying to
escape by banging on the glass. Is it like corked in there or
sealed in there? Yeah, yeah, he's corked in
there. Thinking in, I had seen that
it's a goblin in a bottle, baby. Rub it the right way, yeah.
Yeah, Bucket, I thought I buck. Into it.
Looking directly into your soul. I hope this problem.
Integral. That's a good, good title.
Hey, very well, Mike Goblin in a bottle.
Yeah, I'm a baby. So we have a goblin in a jar,
right? Yes.
He's he's very tiny. He's about the size of baby.
A shot glass. Oh damn, that's a small jar.
That's very small. That's so it's a shot glass
sized jar with the the the idious, bidious freaking goblin.
No, it's a it's a shot glass sized goblin.
That inside of a jar that could finish hot glasses.
Okay. The.
Goblin is the shot glass size. The jar is bigger than.
That okay and. Then with you I'll pick up the
jar you're. Gonna pick up the jar.
I'm gonna pick up the jar. Okay, I mean.
And then as you do, the goblin kind of loses his footing a
little bit, cuz obviously you're.
Goblin. How hot is that goblin getting
in there? You get How hot is he getting in
there? Yeah, no, my hands are on fire.
So I. Keep forgetting.
So realizing the fact that his hands are still on fire, but
just not comprehending the fact that, you know, he could be
cooking this goblin in the jar, he's just gonna look at it and
you're like, Oh well, you look, you're tiny.
You're you're not. As they're doing that through,
the goblin is just kind of sliding around in there.
I'm just, and I'm just moving around just like kind of like,
you know, like a kid that gets a freaking goldfish at the fair,
you know? Yeah.
So yeah. You can tell too, like he's
getting hot. In there you can see kind of
like trying to not touch the, which is impossible to not touch
the class. But trying.
I'm just gonna keep holding on to it until somebody tells me
different. I'm gonna actually look at Hey
guys, look, it's it's Goblin and Jar.
Yeah, let me take a look at that.
I'm gonna reach out for the hot jar and grab it.
Thank you, buddy. This he cute.
I like little pets. I love me little trim.
It doesn't react. In no, no, no did.
You grab it from Did you let it go for him?
Did you give it to him? Rather, if he wants it, I'm
gonna hand it over to him. Give me because it's hot.
Now it's pretty hot, Spice. I.
See me in a toughness. Toughness.
Test toughness. Sure, We'll call it up.
Yeah, yeah. Call it Dr. 14.
That's the 13. Seriously.
Do you have anything to add to it?
Well, it's no okay. I was really glad I decided to
make it a 14, not a 12. It's incredibly hot and you drop
it and the glass shatters. And the goblin grows to full
size immediately, and he attempts to stab fireboy whose
name is Scoot Scoots. Yep.
OK, give me an agility test. Dr. 12.
You take some fire damage.
Some hurt damage. Shut your hole.
Did you? That's 120.
Since that was a crit on a defense, so you get a free
attack I. Was just gonna say.
OK. Yeah.
Well, if he's gonna try to lunch at me, I'm just gonna try to
punch him right in the neck. Nice.
I like it. That's an 8 though, an 8 + 1, so
it's a nine. And it's actually a 14 too, but
it doesn't matter. Yeah, 20.
So yeah, he goes to stab his little knife at you, but not
little anymore. It's normal size this much as it
grew too, yeah. Yes, little life, you heard?
What? He said.
Yeah. Anyway, you find an opening in
his movements and you go to lunch as well, but he gets out
of the way. Initiative boys.
This guy's hostile. I'll roll.
Do it. 6. That's you guys.
That was. Well, I will.
I didn't say I had my curl bar back in my hand.
I must have just put it in my belt or wherever I can.
So I put it back in that necrotic hole in my leg.
So I'm just gonna punch at this goblin again.
OK, go for it. That's four.
That's. Dr. 14 by the way.
Yeah, Nope. That's that is going to be.
OK, keep in mind at this point. Fuck, it's a goblin, right?
Yeah. Technically.
Is it when he hits? Not always when he attacks.
Whenever he attacks. Yep, Yep, so currently.
Scoots, you all have goblin curse at the moment.
Yeah. How many days indeed?
D4D6 something like that. D6 I believe.
Should be D2. It is D6 hours, so give me D6.
3. Three.
You have three days to kill this boy.
He meant minutes. If I had, yeah, I was gonna say
if I had my choice, it would be 3 minutes.
Yeah, yeah. I mean, we could run away.
Anyway. What was the rest of you guys?
Oh yeah, You go to a stab at him and you.
You. No.
I went to, I went to punch at him, yeah.
That's right, Okay. So you go to punch at him?
Yeah. You miss.
He's he's so quick. He's hard to hit.
Yeah, and short. The fight doesn't make me easier
to hit who's up? I'm right next to.
Him you are. That makes sense.
I'll fucking. Stab with my rusty butter knife.
Okay go. For it.
It's a Shank, thought it in the prison mattress.
Ooh. That's true.
What do I need? You need 14.
OK, is this Goblin Rich? Probably not.
No. He's actually pretty.
He was in a he was a tiny little goblin in the jar.
I diet, all right. I hope you ask every single
time, man. I guess we don't know his home
life I saw. You baby.
I definitely miss my swing instead of stabbing him in the
top. The head I fucking whiff and
stab myself in the kneecap. No, I really thought you really
wanna say that. I glance myself in the kneecap.
Okay, who's up? I will scoot over there and.
Nice one. The no emotion made it all the
better and I'll come in and try to.
Hit this dude with my hammer, my ball, peen hammer.
I God damn it, I'm. Going with that.
I need some. Not much better than ball peen
hammer for hitting goblins in the head.
I mean, I suppose you know, ooh, that's 19 + 2.
That's a hit. Nice.
Oh my God, give me the goodness. Oh.
Yeah, that's the goodness, baby. One damage.
Give it to him.
You just like, tell me about it, right?
No, not at all. Actually, we have my another D2
for his ropey skin. Damn.
Actually, never mind, you did one.
Damage. You can't.
Yeah, Never. Mind.
That ropey skin. Which I don't understand how
that would stop a bro, a ball being leathery.
Yeah, yeah, I suppose like you hit him and it's just kind of
absorbs the blow his skin does. He just giggles like a moron.
All right, Tom, all. Right.
Yeah. Weamon is gonna take the bar and
he's gonna try to like, come up behind him to grab him and kind
of grapple him. Yeah, yeah.
The goal is to try and toss him in the oven with the lasagna
keep. In mind you guys are in like the
larder. The oven is a little bit of
weight. We'll drink that some bitch over
there. He's very loyal.
Yeah. Yeah.
Fair enough. I'll.
Murder a goblin. I wouldn't.
That's gonna be to grab and strength Year 14, yeah.
Yeah, yeah. I got a 12 -, 1 to 11.
I'm gonna go ahead and do an omen.
All right. How many got?
Minus four and that brings me I have one left after that.
Okay. Wonderful.
Yeah. And that's a success then?
I'm like, you're a bastard. Perfect.
It's so good to see it as a skeleton here, by the way.
Yeah, the. Skeleton.
Yeah, with human eyes just like darting around.
That's pretty good. God, who is left?
Leviticus. Leviticus, yeah.
Fisk is just mouth deep on these toes.
God. So in other.
Words. You're doing it, The goblin.
So you're doing this star? Yeah, yeah.
He's just like chewing on the toes of this guy on the spit
and. Imagine that's like the the
larger this like scuffle. It is the goblin they didn't
came out of I. Hate.
Everything, the reality, what he's seeing as he's doing this,
he's like they're fucking around there, can't really see what
they're doing and then all of a sudden.
Your glass break and then a goblin, and then you see them
the entire. Time Toes in mouth, Yeah.
He's not. Even breaking stride.
No, he's on. I got the like mental image of
like a toddler with a popsicle. Just.
Absolutely. The goblin is going to attempt
to get out of. Fuck.
That little thing that you got going on with him, His.
Grapple is a love hug you. Know that little relationship
that. That's going to be Tom for you
or for agility, strength or. Strength.
Yeah, dear 14. And he gets out.
No, I imagine he kicked me in the shin.
Perfect. Yeah, you in the shin.
You lose your grip on him or your focus and he slips out and.
There's no skin to protect that. That's true.
That really hurts. Me right on the phone.
Oh my God, you better say that every.
Time. Yeah, right, right.
No shit. That was the goblin's turn.
So that gives us, brings us back to initiative, anybody.
I'll roll. I'll do it.
I'll turn you, boy. I shouldn't have done that.
That is a tube. This little fucker, goddamn it,
he just books it. He takes off to the North End of
the room. He only makes it as far as the
door. He doesn't get a chance to leave
in this time. He actually runs over by where
you are, sitting there, toe sucking.
He is probably within arm's reach of you at this point, cuz
you're right there by the door. Kinda.
Don't be like Spiderman. Stop this man or he's gonna go
out and kill your uncle. What I.
Mean. It's really accurate, but what
the fuck I have so funny, no? Not a little man.
Oh God. Well, where did this little
feller come from? And I'm going to Waltoll and
mouth, by the way, so. Internal monologue.
Impale him on my broad X. With that toaster in your mouth,
yeah, I feel like keeping that posture is gonna hamper you a
little bit, So I'm gonna make that a little bit harder.
I'm gonna call it a Dr. 16 Strength to do that.
He's gonna get it. Maybe the toe popped off cuz it
was cooked meat. It was nice and tender.
That all depends. You said it was tender.
I did say it well, he said. But then he said it was charred,
so that's not tender at all. It flaked right off.
What am I going for? A 16 due to the fact that you
were insisting on staying in that position unless you're not.
I mean, that's, you know. Jaw deep on a foot, yeah.
It's just a 15. Do it.
I guess I'll omen. You're gonna omen, Yeah.
Just to keep that toe in your mouth, yeah.
I mean to you, man. Dedicate to the bit.
For sure. OK, so that's a success.
Give me the damage then. 4 This is a big.
Number give me a D2 as well for the armor for the ropey skin.
It's ropey, ropey. 1. Wait.
One, so 4 -, 1, yes, 3. I see.
You're nice. You hack his arm off, which is
fortunate. Unfortunately, it's not the one
holding the knife. But yeah, so yeah.
You slice his arm off with your axe.
He bleeds all over the floor, naturally still alive.
Cowering now. Why wouldn't you in that
scenario anyway? Do they have morale?
What's that? Do they have morale?
You do have morale, but it's not really his turn yet.
No, no, I was just curious. Yeah.
Yeah, they morale. So the rest of you, for you guys
see as you guys are still clustering in the larder fucking
around with this goblin that ran away, you see?
I was gonna say Soup Fist. Look at him, I see soup.
You see Fisk, still keeping the toe in his mouth, swing his
broadsword and just hack his arm off.
Damn. Holy.
Shit, I'm gonna run over, stare at fist.
That's disgusting, and then go and try to punch the goblin in
the head again. You just come running soup and.
Punch all Was it a 14? They need it.
Yeah. I got a 15 on device, so that's
a 16. Yeah, yeah, all.
Right. And so that's the with the
punch, it's D 4 + 2. +2 that's. So that's four points of damage,
and then it's got that ropey. Yep.
Ropey.
Skin, so it's two, so two damage.
Too damaged? Okay Wonderful.
He is on death's door. However, he's not dead.
I have to roll a D6. I got a one in six chance for
that. Okay, yeah.
Are you calling that A1 or A6? I'm calling it A1 and I did.
I didn't get it. So okay, he's not such fires.
Give him a big old punch in the face and his nose is just his
sharp nose is just bent back and clearly broken and you fell.
Those bones give way as it is. Push through.
And and as I punch him, the fire of my eyes is like light, ever
brighter so. And then he's on his knees.
One of our missing is. Am I?
Hey, partner, why don't you toast me up that arm of his when
you got a minute? Just kind of kick it off to the
side towards him. Nice, Tom and murder this
goblin. These things we met.
We Met murder this goblin. All right, yeah.
Cuz I was like, since he got the shin kick, I'm just pissed off
and he's just, yeah, I'm just running out far overhead.
Swinging the ball because I said he's on his knees.
We're gonna drop that Dr. Cuz he's no longer quick.
So Dr. 12. Just got it.
Then I got a 12. Lucky baby.
All right, so yeah, roll damage. And then of course D2 for the
armor. That is a four and then D2 for
armor. Is 2 on the armor so too
damaged? Tell me about it, yeah.
All right. Yes.
Yeah, so I'm just like screaming as I come in there and you know,
obviously wide eyed, just looking around everywhere, just
just craving in the skull. Just like I would imagine.
Just kind of like gore splattering out and hitting up
to Fisk. Yeah, yeah, still toes in mouth.
I was just thinking that like fisky and just sprayed in head
blood. No reaction to it.
Yeah, don't care. Like my lips.
You guys are adequately murderous, I would say.
Yeah, no, that was pretty dope. Yeah, great.
A Duke sitting at one of the tables.
Just soup. Mean it.
They're. Glad for you to help us.
You really, honestly believe that I'm useful in a fight?
You would have fallen apart. Exactly.
It's already falling. Apart what's it gonna hurt?
Right, let's get out of here. Anything.
I just like poked some stuff a bit.
Should we get out of here now or yeah?
I have another joy. Yeah, I've had three bowls.
I'm gonna scrounge this goblin skirt or whatever he's wearing.
How much did you eat though? Like 1.
How much made it into your old ass face?
No, it's the whole like that joke.
Like I had two bowls this morning, only one of which was
cereal. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Madam.
That was from Becker. That was fucking Ted Danson
show. Fucking ridiculous anyway.
Before we take off, I'm gonna scrounge this.
Body. You're gonna scrounge the
goblin. Why not, Goblin?
I'm gonna put hands on them. As you can see too, he's only
got like a loincloth. You might be key string.
Are you really gonna check? Yeah, all crazy.
I'm a desperate. Like everyone?
Else, like, he might have something in his ass.
Yeah, I've delivered animals and all sorts of.
Stuff. Goblin's asking nothing.
The. Very first word in his class
description is desperate. That's a fair point.
Of course, give me a D66 for
corpse plundering. Also, Scoots, you no longer have
goblin curse because that goblin's dead.
Hooray. Wraps that to you.
You can thank Weeman for that. Thanks Weeman.
We. Saved your life.
We are meant. We got. 53A 53.
Nice. I feel like I know what this is.
It's so weird. So you.
Yeah, you're like digging into this.
And you're just like, he might have something in his ass.
I don't know. I know.
And like, you're the fucking deep you found things in others.
You check because you found things before looking and no.
We have a lot of something in here.
Cuz you're like, elbow deep, right?
At this point, you're probably, like, pretty I.
Can't figure out you're the lungs and you feel.
Hair and you grab onto this and you pull out and you think maybe
some dead animals in there, but what you find is.
Paul's never pulled out. It's not just vocabulary.
You pull out a scalp with long black hair.
No. No.
Looks like you found his dinner. People aren't comfortable with
my games. One guys over sucking on toes of
the fucking wigs out of people's asses.
I think. I was gonna say he's pulled a
toupee out of the goblin's ass. And exactly what happened.
Yeah, so my. Question is does this?
Thing do anything. It's just a skill.
He puts.
It on his bald. Head.
I don't think I'm bald, actually.
Oh no, that's some other character that's got luscious
hair. Uh, yeah, I'm gonna just put.
Put that on top of my head. OK.
How do you? Feel like you like this?
Melts like. Shit, I was strong.
May I approach the bench? Yeah.
Oh no. Oh no.
Oh no, not this. Shit that smells so bad and I
pulled this from the depths of this goblins colon.
Yep. Would it not be similar to the
neck, intestines or it gives me a little bit of a threat
reduction? Like intestines of the baby
killer. Ah, what that was called.
It was. I feel like the test, if that
was if if you were gonna allow it in that same mechanic, the
test would be. Worse far.
Lower. Yes, they would make it easier.
The chance that somebody could be just at like, like a.
DS I have to get a six, six or lower and you're.
Trying to compare it to the bowels of a baby killer, right?
Trying to grab some of that. What that says is take the bowl
and drape the entrails over you gaining A monster's scent.
In this case, you're wearing a wig.
That was in goblin scent, sure, but mostly goblin shit.
Evil creatures must make a DR14 check when attempting to discern
your location. Should you fail?
Should they fail, you pass by a notice.
That's a lot. So what I'm gonna say is, any
creature really that you guys come across is gonna need to
make a pretty low test like a DR6, right?
That's right. If they fail it, they're just
like, repulsed by it. Okay.
But. I.
Mean like there's like it came from some.
It's not like, sure, it came from the corpse plundering table
and it's just some random nonsense.
But like the stuff we made it, the story around it, you could
possibly give it some kind of effect.
Regardless, yeah, just 30 miles. Regardless, I'm waiting to see
how this is going to play out in action like I.
Feel like that something is gonna wanna hit him because he
smells like shit and doesn't wanna get shit on him.
The other one I. Wouldn't punch a guy wearing a
shit wig. That's fair.
Not at all. Well, if this guy running up to
me with his shit wig, he's gonna fucking wanna fight me.
I'm gonna kinda run. I just don't wanna get shit on
me. I'm gonna be like, fighting.
I don't wanna get in my blood. I don't wanna get Doug.
Shit Wig. Shit Wig was my fucking band in
college. Now I'm.
Gonna adjust my fucking crap toupee.
Just like, slick it over. Yeah, I lick my palm and then
slick the. And.
Then lick it again. All right, Paul's ready.
He's he's good to go. My scalp would get a little.
Cold, actually, that was. That was a.
Fortunate fun I. Need to get rid of all this.
Walks. That was like the.
Farm. This walks up with a handful of
toes. That was the most gruesome thing
I've ever seen. You're right.
And the toes ain't weird either. Yeah, honestly, that was pretty
fucked up. Hey, I got a question for you
guys. Take a look at this.
He shows you the stump of his hand and it's looking terrible.
Does this look infected? Hey Kevin, at the end of the
episode. Just to let you know that this
episode featured the adventure trapped within by Phillip
Jensen. With Levi playing Fisk the
Cannibal Cook by Ian Gray, Tide Long Thomas playing We MIT the
Catacomb St. by Makuti, myself playing Scoots the Scorched
Bedlamite featured in. Trapped Within by Philip Jensen,
Jake playing Paul the Desperate Farmhand by Raptor Shadow, and
Nate playing General Cedric Balthazar, the betrayed Phantom
by Sasha Death of the Eldridge Tomb.
There you go. Let it out.
Come on, couple more I. Think it's.
Only two this time. Oh wow.
Wow, that's rare. It's a weak demon.
Now, because I need to have my stupid joke in here, Farsen.
Farsen Yeah, that's. Oh, it's staying.
He's. Just bound he's.
Just bound. Stopping you guys give me a D4.
OK. Oh no, is this?
For the mosquitoes in my urethra.
I don't. Want to know what the right
podcast for that is 3? I'll do a D4.
If you wants to do a D8, I'll. Do the D8.
I didn't roll a thing yet. I didn't.
Roll a thing. If you were handing me like a
hot piece of glass that you were wrote, that sounds.
A hot. Piece.
Check out that hot piece of glass.
His wife don't justify it. Just roll boy.
It is a goblin penis everyone's talking about.
I never noticed it. It's.
A poop. That's what I just figured.
It was like a tail. That's what I thought.
Yeah, it's a dingleberry. Gobbo Dong.
Welcome to the Gobbo Dog. I don't think I'm bald,
actually. Oh no, that's some other
character that's got luscious hair.
No, you're bald. In real life, yeah, I shaved
again. Oh good.
It always looks nice when you do it.
Thanks. Thank you.
We care about you, but anyway, yeah.
Yeah, I'm gonna just put that on top of my head.
One of the things I was waiting though is that like Paul, like
pulling out that scalp and I've been like.
Ta da. That's amazing dude.
Magic trick pulling the tablecloth.
I'll just rip it out real. Quick.