Warning, the following program is not for the weak hearted,
those who are close minded or in general you're scared to learn
what's behind closed doors. Here at Sapphires Airplay.
I want you to pour the wine, grab somebody that you want to
hold on to, or better yet, get the vibration stimulated through
your body. Get ready for one hell of an
orgasm in 54321. What is up on my sexy
motherfuckers out there in radioland it's your girl
sapphire back at it with another episode of sapphire 0 play now
you know how this goes down we got a beautiful lady got a
beautiful entity You know they got the entity on their their
you know their breasts yes I'm talking about Jason wiggle
wiggle wiggle. Now, if you don't know who this
delectable creature is, let me just say urban X nominee, Urban
X awards are taking place August 17th.
That's for all your urban. I hate the word urban, but you
know what I mean. Like it's all your your
melanated, yes, the melanated populated, you know, the melanin
popular starlets and stars of the adult industry gathering in
one place. And hopefully, hopefully they
don't pull another BET where they're just pulling left and
right. All these great, you know,
awards for black excellence. So celebrating black excellence,
None other than Miss Lady Cinder bringing out the frat boys.
And let me just tell you, we love it.
We love it. They love it, yes.
Now let me just tell you guys, there's been some behind it.
I never talk about behind the scenes snafus.
Lady Cinder and I have been recording or trying to record
for the past 45 minutes. I don't know about y'all, but
August has shown its asshole. Complete asshole.
No ma'am, That part, that part. So, you know, and if you don't
know what we're talking about, CP time, well, you're listening
to a black podcast. That means color people's time.
We don't show up on time. You say a party starts at 12,
they're going to show up at 6:00, OK, You don't show up at
6:00 and. Call that early and call that.
Early. You'll be late for your own damn
funeral. OK, if you're showing up at my
wedding at the time, I if I'm not ready to come out at my own
wedding, y'all just going to have to sit there, Sit there and
marinate until I'm ready. That's what it is.
But lady center was not sitting in juice is marinating.
No, she was ready, I was ready. Coffee ready, ready.
Didn't have a hit of weed and then what happens the Internet
how to show its asshole but we here now we here.
It showed this whole sphincter, not even the asshole it showed
the muscles up in. Asshole, it's like you want some
problems. Bitch I got your problems a
prolapse Internet man lady center.
I feel like you and I just already know each other and yet
we have not met in. Person we really are, please.
Oh, I won't sue you, girl. I will.
I'm going to welcome it all, OK? Listen, I'm gay as hell.
You might see me fiance to a man.
Listen. Polyamorous.
Bisexual. I got it all and I love the
ladies. Omnisexual.
Yes. You know, it's kind of like you
just sniff your own kind. You're like smells like
polyamory. Or the hard.
Way you know what? That's, I don't know, it sounds
like Urban XI might be tackled by many women.
I mean, go go fuck me. I mean, go, go Zombie.
Watch. Go go Zombie is going to get my
ass for saying that. Yeah, she changed it.
We just had her on Airplay. She said she wants to tackle me.
I said I welcome it full heartedly.
I'm scared to see her in person. I'm excited.
But now I got you, so I got 2.
Sweetest, kindest person ever. See, I can't, I can't take it
with. There's something about, and
let's talk about this because you know, we're just going to
get into it all. So lady sender, you're a femdom.
You are a sideshow performer. You've only been in this side of
the adult entertainment pool for three years.
But you, you breathe and live, live all of this.
BDSM is your lifestyle. And now, you know, I love to
call out people. It's like people hate call out
culture. But I'm like, no, no, no, no,
no, it's not calling out. It needs to happen.
The rise of, yeah, like the rise of black fandom has been rising.
And if you're like, what does this mean?
Just go on your Twitter. If you still have Twitter and X,
whatever the fuck you want to call it, There's a lot of women
out there. They didn't pay their bills.
It's Twitter. There's a lot of women out there
that are claiming femdom and I do see it amongst my sisters.
And I'm like, OK, what sets you apart?
What sets y'all apart as a true femdom?
And I got to ask as an OG, somebody who's been living and
breathing this lifestyle and, and femdom is not like a new
term, but we are now seeing it more than ever, more than ever.
What you got to say about it? Well, I'm I'm corrected because
there's Finn Dom FINDOM and then there's Fem Dom FEMCOM.
Put some respect on it. So we're seeing a rise of Finn
Dom, and that's a whole bunch of cute little bitches with middle
fingers being like, yeah, fuck you and no one cares.
Like a fandom more often than not is going to have some
practical skills they might be interested in.
Fandom I'm into it. Like goes into it.
Like there's a bunch of us that are into it and everything.
But fandom is financial domination.
Fandom is female domination. I'm glad that you said that
because I myself, I do find myself getting very confused
online because I do see, you know, parts of thin Dom with
femdom and then they don't want to collaborate.
They're like no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, just because I'm
demanding a pay pig. No, I'm a femdom.
It's like no, but you're demanding money to be drained
from some pathetic soul on the Internet and you're demanding
money that's thin Dom. That's just like the only fan
creators that are showing pussy to say I'm not a sex worker, you
are flashing pussy. I got thoughts.
OK, so here we go. I started out as this dungeon
that's a legendary dungeon in LA called Sanctuary.
There's this one girl. Not going to name her name
because fuck the hell, sorry. I had issues with her.
It's fine, but she was really reluctant to call herself a
fucking sex worker and kind of look down on any other sex
worker. And I'm like, bitch, you're a
dumb nature. You're facilitating a
motherfucker's nut, OK? You're still a sex worker.
There's no answer butts about. It you know, OK, actually I got
questions because I've actually and I've been to the sanctuary
at least once before it closed down.
Now I know that it's resurfacing.
It's still wait wait, which one was someone that just like
closed in the reopen? So yes, sanctuary LAX folds.
They had their one location right LAX and then they closed
for a few months because they were dealing with like, you
know, landlord shit, right? And then they moved to El
Segundo and I was there right at the end where they're closing.
And then while they were closed, which is when I got in the
content because I was like, what the fuck am I supposed to do?
I just started working at the Dom and now my gun to disclose
and I don't know how to do this shit because I just started
working it. And so then I got the content
and then section were reopened and everything and like the
location is different and I want to go into another junction that
I wanted working at in between the the opening and closing of
it. But yeah, so you know, yeah,
it's, it's just. Yeah, it's, I've heard many
different things and this is not to shine on the community.
ABDSMI, do I do openly talk about this as someone who is
polyamorous, does dabble in the lifestyle like I do have.
As I told you before, I have a Dom, that's my fiance.
I have a girlfriend who's also a bit.
Maybe we could cope, yeah. I would love that, absolutely
would love that. And I know he will be listening
to this and he will also be saying I kind of like that he,
you know, it's. Oh my God, we will negotiate it
and we will work it. Out I love it because I would
love to be double teamed. I think the last and only time I
went to LAALAXI think I was suspended.
Now I might hear it in church like a no that wasn't that
place. But I remember vividly going to
a dungeon, only one, because I'm very like, selective of where I
play. But I just remember, you know,
dungeons are not scary. And I want people to understand,
like, dungeons are not a scary thing.
It can be a scary thing. Yeah, it can be a scary thing
depending upon what you're looking for.
But also, I talk about this a lot and I'm so glad that you
joined the show and especially you are based in LA.
There's not a lot of us when it comes to fem doming.
Again, fem doming, there's not a lot of like places for black
folks to feel secure to play in areas.
And that's for me, like why Sanctuary LAX and all those
like, And it kind of scared me because the most of the time I
only know and my my Dom is white.
You know, my fiance is white. I'm in an interracial
relationship and I still get these looks from time to time,
like, oh, you won't let this white man beat you.
It's like, Nah, Nah, Nah, Nah, Nah, Nah, Nah, Nah, Nah.
Oh, let's talk about these thoughts because the black BDS
scene, BDSM scene in LA, Would you say it's kind of like, OK.
So I'm gonna just say it and I'm gonna say my whole ass chest
BDSM is white and Loki high key kind of racist because there is
this whole overarching look of BDSM and society and how it has
been purported throughout society and the fact of how the
culture got started. It's subversive underground.
It was white people being able to not be able to do this and
they completely forgot that underground subversive nature is
black. It's minority because we were
the original underground, unwanted this that other didn't
fit in like we the original soul.
You could call yourself running away because Oh my God, I like
this and I'm so bad because I like it.
I'm like my mommy and daddy don't love me anymore.
Fuck you. We're the original.
We couldn't exist on this earth because nobody wants like fuck
you. No.
But when you go to a dungeon, there is a particular look.
It's black leather, it's latex. It's pale skin.
It's all this. It's blonde hair.
It's dark, dark hair. It's red hair.
Why exactly? It's like it's the cheerleader
who turned you down. It's the principal who was a
little too rough on you. It's like the dude of the
fedora. It's none of these things are
harkening to blackness. And like I said, minorities,
Black people in particular are the original subversive culture,
subversive nature. We don't fit in.
We are the underground original so to and they won't costly make
us feel like we don't fit in. We don't play the part, we don't
look the part, we don't know what they know.
Or they have this weird way of thinking that just because a
piece of chocolate goes into a room full of a sea of white
dough that that chocolate chip is theirs.
Because there have been times where I feel like I'm on the
menu and my ass was not on the menu and that's why I rarely
play in public spaces. So I have to say shout out to
you and you know, other black thumb Doms out there who feel
comfortable in playing in public amongst white people because.
Nobody going to tell me about me but me.
Oh oh. Not ever.
Oh my goodness. I'm sorry I was not raised to
give a fuck about somebody elses opinion on me.
Like it's nice if you have an opinion on me, good, bad and
different, whatever cool you have that opinion.
What's that got to do with me? It's of me.
What the fuck does that to do with me?
Like, and I tried very hard to remember that when I get down
and shit like that, like oh, so so doesn't like me.
It's like, OK, and they didn't like me yesterday, they didn't
like me now, but I'm still doing shit.
I'm still being neat. So like, the fuck does that have
to do with anything? Like I don't care.
So I got to remember that from time to time because you know, I
mean, you mean shit like shit gets to me.
Like no one wants to be just like like you rather go through
like being like, but I can't do that.
Like I sound like this. I sound mad aggressive.
I sound intense. I am intense to like say or do
and people are going to jive with it or not.
OK, two things that you said earlier.
You said, you know, the people who walk into these dungeons are
your typical cheerleader, the cheerleader that didn't want to
fuck you, the nerd that didn't want to fuck you, or we should
say the incel like nerd because now that's a thing.
That is a look. The Incel.
The incel, you know, and the incels that are very like
borderline into the race play borderline into racism.
That's that's the branding that comes involved.
But then also, you just said something now.
And yeah, you do come off as intense, but I like it.
You don't come off as intense to a way you're not approachable.
I have people tell me I'm not approachable all the time.
Like especially when I'm just sitting someplace and I'm just
like people tell me I'm a bitch, I'm intimidating.
I'm just that other. I'm like, what do you mean I, I.
Can't wait to be like tackled by you.
As I said, I think that you it is it is that black alternative
look, but it's like, would you say that to a white counterpart?
Would you just go up to your white counterpart and be like
you look so intense. Let's fuck.
No, but they do it to me all the time.
For real. For real.
Like. I can't tell you how many calls
I get where they're just like so like OK, one or two.
Would you ever let me be dominant?
No, go ask him nothing. Fucking dumb ass bitch.
That stupid ass shit fuck fucking cut your fucking finger
off for you to write that shit to me, you fucking dumb ass
fucking. And then the other thing is that
so like, how much is it the fuck OK?
How many other dominatrixes are you asking if you can fuck me?
Can, can we please? Can we please talk about that?
Like BDSM, yes there's a sexual component in it, but a lot of
the times you don't ask a Dom to fuck, you don't ask a Dom that.
Fucks up the power dynamic of the whole thing.
Like like close female naked male.
Are you going to ask her to fuck the woman?
What? No, that's a whole fetish.
The woman stays completely clothed, is teasing the man, and
he's naked and being completely abdominant.
Like you're really going to ask this woman who's completely
buttoned the fuck down to fucking where we're going to RIP
a hole in the fucking pants too? Like what the fuck stupid head
ass game somewhere else. Leave me the fuck?
Alone. And again, as I said this in my
conversation with Gogo and with all the sex workers, to be
honest, I have yet to have a content creator come on here and
argue the fact that if they were showing their genitalia
somewhere on a public platform that thrives on sex and they are
receiving monetary value for sex, that makes you a sex worker
again if you are doing BDSM. Not even that.
If you are facilitating someone else's orgasm, you're a sex
worker. If you're arousing someone with
the intent of them getting off or having knowing that they're
going to have sexual thoughts about what is the fuck you're
doing and you're making money off of that, that's sex work.
Like, I'm sorry. Would you say?
Those shut up and take it. Would you say even like, and
here's the biggest argument I guess you could say is would you
say even if you are, you know, in your thumb Dom you're
receiving money, Thumb Domness, receiving money, carrying out a
non sexual act of BDSM, would you still call yourself a sex
worker? Yeah, because they're aroused.
Like I'm facilitating your arousal.
That's sex work. Like what?
I'm getting paid to turn you on. Just because it's non sexual to
someone else, like it's feet or something, that doesn't mean
it's not sex. That is sex to that person
because that's their thing. And if you have someone who's
obsessed with peanut butter and shit and they they get off it
and you give them peanut butter, I'm sorry you just became
obsessed with them. You saw that person peanut
butter and you knew what the fuck it was going to do to them.
It's not like you had no clue what the fuck peanut butter was
going to do. They told you, hey, I'll get off
the peanut butter and I'm going to think about you sending this
to me. So, you know, like, could you
hand me this peanut butter? And you're like, yeah, thanks
for the money. You're a sex worker.
I'm you, you don't have to be a lifelong sex work, but for that
moment you fucking sold to sex. If you guys are not watching my
reaction, first of all, you must got to watch it on YouTube and
Spotify in order to do this. Anybody that's like I only am
able to listen Everybody's like I'm always I'm only allowed to
listen. You just got to switch your
providers. That's really what it is.
And I feel like now I have to put up these captions because
every time someone calls me out when you know what you just did
with laying the line out and I'm shaking my head in agreeance.
I want people to understand. Like, I'm not saying this
because I have no business, OK? You have the business.
You have the right to say this. And it's 1000% true.
And I really want people to stop shunning sex work.
And not just shunning, but like having such a down thought on
it, like just like looking down on it so wholeheartedly that it
endangers people in various deeper sectors of it.
Because when you make someone who does something minute look
like the same as someone who does something intense, then the
person who does the more intense aspect doesn't feel safe enough
to report anything that happens to them because like, well, I'm
dirty because I do this. And like if something happened
to them, then they wouldn't even feel conflict.
You don't make someone feel sick.
You don't give them any chance to be respected as a human being
that happens to have a job that. Is this name?
It's not. Your job to judge anybody's job
because there is someone that's occupying that job.
There's someone that made that job a necessity.
So if you're going to look down on anybody, maybe that person.
But I don't think that's the case because like sex work is a
means to an end. It cuts out the mess.
Like anyone who goes to like an escort, prostitute, whatever you
want to call it, they want that human interaction without the
mess of having like, you know, going on a date and doing all
this stuff and dealing with the nagging or whatever the fuck
they want to call it. They want to cut clean, dry
interaction, know what the fuck they're going to go in getting,
get that, have a good time, spend their money and then go
back to their fucking life and then do it again watching for
Pete as he fit. Same with our if you have this
wife that will look at you all crazy because you want to smell
her socks, OK, you get to safely go to someone who's not going to
judge you for that. But rub those stinky socks all
in your face like you sniffle, bury them in their tits like you
sniff them way out like, and you're not going to be judged.
And you can have that safety and catharsis of indulging in
yourself safely with someone who understands you.
Emphasis on that safety, please. Emphasis on the safety, because
that's the problem too. We should be safe for both
sides, the person going and the person for Friday.
Like that's the whole point of this.
Everybody gets to indulge in their shit safely.
I, I, God, I, I'm just like, I want to hug you so much because
you are making so many good points.
Like seriously, you are making such good points.
And again, the word safety always come to mind for me.
Communication and safety. Anybody who listens to any
episode of Sapphire's Ear Play, those are the two biggest things
I try to advocate. For and that's how you know
you're in the world of BDSM because anybody who's really
truly and not a predator in this shit, because there are those
raining as fucking decent people that know what the fuck they
doing and have big followings and shit even in the loan
anyway. But yeah, so like, there are
people perpetrating all sorts of fallacies in this shit and
anyone who actually knows what this is about knows
communication, consent, safety gives you the freedom to do this
shit full body. Like that's why Subs should be
held with sub reverence and honor because they're giving
themselves over to you mind, body and soul.
You guys letting you do what you want to them.
They are letting you do that. You can control whatever the
fuck you want. They are letting you do that to
them. People think that who the fuck
would be doing this? Exactly, and people think that
emissives are such a weak thing. It's like, no, as a sub, I'm a
sub and I come off as a very big dumb person.
I'm like, no, no. I don't I got a topic for you
after you did. I will I will tell it to you
right now so we don't forget it because please.
But the fact that black women aren't allowed to be submissive?
Oh my God. Yes, I have a whole bunch of
black female submissive friends and they always get asked if
they're a dominant. Would they Dom somebody just
because they look that way? One's a trans woman. 1 is just a
tall statue as black woman. Like they they're both just tall
statue as women. Actually, because of their
height and their demeanor and their skin tone, that they're
supposed to be dominant. I want to get into this because
it's very rare. It's a very weird thing that I
could talk about that. So I want to get into that
because it's a very weird thing that I can come onto the
platform, say that I'm a sub and people will understand, you know
how degrading it is as a black woman that we cannot be seen
other than aggressive, strong, dominant, not, and like you
said, not every black woman. It's the magical Negro trope
that's been reported throughout filming history.
Recording history throughout time like I, we are not allowed
to have any weakness, any chink in our armor.
If we do, it's supposed to be a building stone to lead to some
greater strength. That will happen.
Later and it doesn't need to have that to.
Be have frailty. I just want to get off like the
next person, OK? I'm not trying to cure World
Peace with my pussy, though I would love to.
I would love my pussy to be able to.
It's not my job, you know? I'm just trying to get off and
have a good time. The labor of society is not on
your shoulders just inherently because you're black.
Thank. You and I hope you know what,
Please emphasize on that. It is not our job, Black people.
It is not our job to cure any disparity.
Anyone else's trauma? I'm sorry.
Your trauma is not my fucking business unless I choose to make
it my business. You don't get to throw your
fucking trauma at me because you think I'm strong enough to take
it. You ask my permission before you
do. That shit is a thing in every
aspect of life. And it should.
Be time people just start venting to you and shit and it's
like, whoa, whoa, you don't know where I'm at in my life, where
I'm at in my day. Like you don't know what I've
gone through. Like can you check and be like,
hey, like I got a whole bunch of shit on my head.
Can can I like talk to you for a second?
I'll be like, you know what, what is it?
Maybe I don't know, but I'll try, you know, but like give
somebody the opportunity to be like, yo, I'm strong enough for
this. No, I'm not.
Like let's like see what they got in them before you just go
shit at them. Exactly, and that's why I'm
like, we have to learn consent early on and if we learned it
more early on in life I think people would be a lot better
off. Even if you're not, you know,
into sex. Asexuals know what consent is.
Children with the right proper parenting and rearing know what
consent means. It starts at the early age where
the kid is forced to kiss grandma or hug, you know, Uncle
Joe, and they say no, don't push the child to go hug the family
member. I have for the longest time have
always asked a child, hey can I give you a hug?
If they hesitate, hey can I get a thumbs up?
Can I get a high pot? Because that hesitation is a no.
They don't have the words to do it comfortably, but that is a
no. Exactly.
If it's not an enthusiastic fuck yes it's a no thank you.
I was always taught and that's the same.
I was taught, you know, listen, you don't have to hug everybody.
You could say hi and that's it. And if they persist, stranger
danger, that's it, stranger danger.
And I think we tend to forget that as we become older and we
get involved in, you know, actions like BDSM.
And we tend to forget the Dom sub role.
Like I said earlier, Subs are always seen as these weak
entities in life when exactly we're not that.
Again, I'm proud to say that I'm a sub or a switch depending upon
who I'm sexually aroused with. But I will say 9 times out of
10, I am very submissive, very submissive in my private life,
in my public life. I always say it like like when
it comes to professional shit, the most people who have the
money to see us professionally cannot be submissive.
In their day-to-day life. They are submissive.
They are allowing themselves to be submissive to you because of
trust and because they want to relax.
They want to get out of themselves for a minute and just
have the thoughts taken out of their head.
They want to have someone think for them.
They want to have someone be for it, and they're trusting you and
entrusting you with that and like giving you a chance to
honor them. And you're fucking demeaning it
by being like, Oh yeah, you're a bitch.
You're it's like, yeah, call them a bitch, but know why the
fuck you're doing it. That brings me up into my next.
I always say it's like, I want to hurt you.
I don't want to hurt, you know, like I don't want to cause you
lifelong trauma. Like this is supposed to be fun.
This is cathartic. This is you indulging in your
shit. You just feel like a piece of
shit just because you jerk off. This is the same shit.
It's it's. It's the same shit A.
Different. Method.
But that's why we had to call out the the little, you know,
the people of social media, when you see the fendoms on social
media or fendoms, right? They think all it takes is a
little shit talking, a little push of the breath.
Just being cute and having a middle finger.
It's not that. It's not that.
Like you just said, it's supposed to be a healing
experience. Healing experience.
Yes, some people like a little. I've had people cry after a
session and like dude, the first time I had that happen where
someone just like and they hugged me and they just like
thank you and I, I felt tears. I'm like, it's like, like you
don't want to put yourself in the in the head space.
Like I'm a therapist. I'm helping you.
I'm sure like no, but like if you're open to the fact that you
can help people work through shit, because I don't think BDSM
should be used to work through shit.
If it happens to happen, cool. Because I think it's unhealthy
to be like, I have trauma. I've been abused, I've been
this, that and other. I'm going to work through it by
being abused. Like that's not healthy.
You need to talk to somebody else and work through some shit.
But if you happen to find healing through it, that's
powerful. It is you unleashing who you
truly are and accepting yourself and realizing your power and
your strength and what you can do and what you're capable of
and just who the fuck you are and finding your people that
understand you. Took the words out of my mouth
because literally it is so alarming.
It is alarming that the rhetoric that is used constantly in BDSM
is that people are fucked up. Black women don't love them
themselves. You know, the submissives, they
don't love themselves. If there's all this negative
connotation, it's like, no, no, no, no.
Have you talked to anybody? And ask them why they
participate in such extremities. And even if it's not an
extremity to you, it might not be to them.
This is the only way that they can heal.
And again, emphasis on the fact that yes, your mistress, your
goddess, you know your queen, your God, whoever you are
submitting yourselves to, they aren't your therapist.
Unless if they have licensed therapist on their business
card, they are not your therapist.
It is not a therapy. Session listening ear if they
allow it. But that's about it, and if they
are trying to do that, maybe you need to reconsider your services
with. Somebody.
Yes, because even like, how do you feel about the hypnotizing
of submissives? OK, I, I, I do hypno, I'm real
good at it, but like I only do it to people who want it.
Like I'm not trying to hypnotize anyone.
Everyone into every little thing.
And I very particular about the things that I do the hypnosis on
and like how I do it and it's more manifestation than anything
else and me playing into what you already want to happen.
Can you give us an example? OK, I'm going to want you to
look very deeply into my eyes. Listen to my voice and the words
that I'm telling you. Put your hand down and pay close
attention. What is it you want out of your
day? Tell me the first thing that
comes to your mind. What's the first thing you want
out of your day? Don't pleasure.
Look around, stare into my eyes and tell me what it is you want
out of your day. Peace.
And pleasure. Then I want you the second we
are done, the second you finish every last thing you need to do,
I want you to focus entirely on yourself.
I want you to do the thing that brings you the most pleasure.
And I want you to take an extra 5 minutes, an extra 10 minutes.
And I want you to give in to yourself.
And you're going to think of my voice and you're going to think
of my eyes haunting you, following you, and you close
yours because I am all-encompassing.
That's a little bit. I don't know about y'all, but
Splooch, OK, No, actually, not going to lie, that was that's
never been done to me before. I'm a. 10th person I don't know.
I like it like when. I was a kid.
Other kids would be like, I'm like, I'm just, I just make eye
contact a lot because I was never taught to be like afraid
of eye contact. So I just look at people when
I'm talking to them and I'm just like, yo.
And I don't break eye contact because I'm not uncomfortable
with it. So and other people are.
So they think I'm being like intimidating or trying to stare
them down. I'm like, no, I'm paying
attention to you because you're talking to me.
I love that because I do the same thing.
It's like if I'm having a conversation with you, I'd
rather be looking directly at the source, you know?
That's why I think some people it, it's funny for me now going
from radio and going into visuals because I'm such a
verbal person. So when I'm looking at you, some
people get a little bit uncomfortable because they're
like, whoa, what's all this icon?
I'm like, would you want me to be watching television and not
paying attention? To you Like you.
Uh huh. Yeah.
No, that was good, right? You can't have a conversation.
I'm doing a hypnosis thing and people do get uncomfortable.
I'm like no, no, no, I didn't say take your eyes away from
mine. Don't look anywhere else.
Don't focus on anything but my voice.
Look at my lips, watch me as I feel like everything can still
sit in it. Don't let anything that's that's
the hypnosis. Act like it's just letting
someone not be uncomfortable. Like sit in it.
Whatever you're feeling, I'm causing it and you know I'm
causing it and you're going to rest in it.
I don't know about y'all again, it's intense.
It's an intense interview and I'm loving I'm a.
Really intense person. I just have to come to grips
with it because I'm loving it in a few months and I used to.
Think the double is a lie? I'm really.
Go with the flu and I'm like, like, I'm just chill as no chill
having ass motherfucker you're ever going to meet.
I love. It I'm sorry, I'm chill as like
I will go with the flow, but I'm going to ask questions.
I'm going to do like I need to know why I'm going with it and
then I'll go with it. Yes, this is going to
arbitrarily do some shit like I got questions.
I'm going if your questions, if your answers are stupid, I'm
going to tell you like, you know, that's really dumb.
I don't think I'm going to do that.
I'll rock with you, but I ain't doing that like you know so.
Boom. So as someone who's carrying
out, you know, the orders, how do you take care of yourself?
Like there's always this question of like, how do you
take care of the sub aftercare? But what do we do about Dom?
How do you self-care after carrying out your intense
training? Like honestly, because we were
talking about this before, I'm a sadomascus.
Like I'm not really a switch because like I used to think
that maybe I was a switch and then I used to think I was maybe
a service top and stuff because I like, I enjoyed topping, but
like it wasn't really my thing and stuff.
And then I met like someone who was like a true masochist and I
got to go ham. And I was like, Oh no, I'm just
sadistic and I'm really sick and fucked up.
And then I learned how to modulate it.
And then I started having fun with like, catering to other
people's like, you know, wants and like making their fantasies
a reality. Because then it's like games I
can play, like, OK, how can I do this?
And then still let you be out of yourself and me give you the
thoughts, but like, get you what you want.
And you know, I just came like a game to me, but like, I forgot
where I was going with that. Oh it was talking about the
aftercare as a Dom for you. Yeah, Aftercare.
Yeah. So being a Sadomascus and
everything like when I used to like pick up play like Threshold
which is like down street from my house.
Probably shouldn't send it anyway.
Everybody's like, I thought. That was like the hardest
dungeon I used to play it like I would go do some pickup play.
I would top a whole bunch of people and stuff and be like,
OK, let's go. Like because I don't submit, but
I love pain. Like it's funny to me, like
dolls are taught me and be like, yeah, you can't eat them.
I'm like, OK, bitch, just do it. Like I've been beating with meat
tenderizers. I've been round housekeeping the
ass where I've gotten air. Like I've been beating with
needle paddles. Like I got video of it like my
butt bloody spirit everywhere. Oh my God.
The whole time because it's just cathartic and funny to me and it
just feels good. So like if OK, I thought the
shit was fucking up again. OK, like like I really do think
like what it takes to be a good Dominic to know what a
submissive is going through. And so you should at least test
out your toys and shit. And like I'm an extreme case
because I'm down to be have shit beating out of me because I
think it's funny and it feels good.
But like that's what I used to do to combat Dom drop and now I
don't really have that and I I don't really get Dom drop as a I
recognize right now I probably do, but like I'm still working
out how to combat it while doing this because.
For people who don't know what I'm.
Kind of going to be kind of known.
So I can't really do pick a play at the dungeon anymore because
there's just a bunch of people trying to get free sessions out
of me. And the first time I I realized
that happened to me, like I went to the dungeon with some friends
that I used to go with and stuff and I just did to pick a play
and I was negotiating with the person and like we stayed in
contact and everything because I was doing, you know, routine
check insurance on them stuff, you know, just like a few weeks
down the line, something like, hey, yo, you're so good with
everything because we were saying some crazy shit and
whatever, you know, and they're like, yeah.
And like they slipped up and said something and I was just
like, wait, you, you know about that?
Like the clips and you know who I am like.
So they did their research. They're like, yeah, no, I didn't
know. I was like, oh, I was like, did
I just get taken on there? I'm like, I kind of, I'm not
kind of used like yo, like so rather than just like, you know,
I'm good at what I do. And rather than just book me,
you saw me there and decided to act like you didn't know who I
was and like it was just an organic meeting.
And like we just got along really well.
We just happened to have overlying kinks and shit like
that. Because I found out later, like
all the stuff that we did wasn't even always their thing.
Like they just knew I liked it because I post a lot what I'm
into on. My Oh no, no, no.
Everything like that and I was just like, I feel preyed on,
like oh like this doesn't feel good.
I don't. So I don't really do pick up
play anymore. I was going to say that at
least. Two years since I've done some
pick up play. That sounds very, very risque.
You know, for someone of, you know, your notoriety, and this
is something that we don't talk about often is, you know,
assuming if you are in sex work and you see somebody at a party
or you see somebody at dungeons, because that's that happens.
I it's happened to me. I've seen, you know, some people
that I worked with and I'm not going to, you know, say anything
until after the fact because I have good rapport.
But also, it's like if you knew that's causing that predatory
behaviour that we were talking about earlier, it's that they
sought you out, they knew who you were, then they're going to
play dumb. And then again, they're causing
more harm to themselves because they're doing what you like, but
they're not performing what they like.
So now you don't know what kind of mental stability that might
have fucked up in their head. And that's why.
People you exactly and I'm like, yeah, and I'm glad I'm someone
who like does check insurance for like a while based off like
how intense the session is and everything because, you know,
feeling can arise whenever they arise.
You you could be cool with something one day and then like
2 months from now not be cool with it.
Absolutely. I'm being more quiet now because
my boyfriend just told me he could hear me down the hall so
I'm like OK. You're fine.
Like but like feelings going to rise like whenever.
So you know, that's okay if anything is wrong or bad or
whatever, but like you have to give space for that to happen.
And really do I check it on people?
But like, you find out weird shit like that.
It, it brings it back to again, the communication because again,
if you're not communicating any type of issues, that's why
negotiations happen. You know, again, people don't
just go to a dungeon, say I want my ass beat and then grab the
first person they see and say beat my ass.
Yeah, there's, there's got to be some type of conversation.
And if you are going to play parties where they're just
beating ass and not talking about it, maybe.
That's not OK. No, no, that's not a true.
I'm sorry, that's some 50 Shades of Grey type shit and that's
bullshit and it's not it. Yeah, and I'm sorry.
And not talking about like it's. Strictly predatory it is.
Anybody who lives by the 50 Shades of Grey, even if you say
it like to the most vanilla person and you're trying to
explain to them your lifestyle, I'll be like, yeah, it's kind of
50 Shades of Grey, but without the predatory behavior.
I'm just, I'm just lying. So you remember when you saw
those handcuffs under your parents bed?
It's like that. Right.
Yeah, don't, don't be quoting. Yeah, don't be quoting Miss EL
James for any to any sex work. Under the sun?
No, don't even pull the cookbook from her.
No, if you're going to a munch, the first thing you would need
to not say is 50 Shades of Grey Brought me here, no.
Done Anybody who mentions 50 days a great munches like I
remember that like years ago when that first came out and
they mentioned like every 50 just a day and I think I was
like. Oh yeah, I know.
Oh, I got to talk to somebody over there.
Right. Even when I was, like, stepping
on to the scene and realizing, like, BDSM and that realm of
kink was something I wanted to carry through everybody, Like
once that book came out, even my mom would come to me.
And she's like, do you know about this?
You know about that? And I'm like, yeah, but this is,
this is just mommy porn written like a kindergartner.
Like, no, no, I wanted to praise that.
Even well written like and like I he touched my hand and like I
got wet because like he had handcuffs and like Oh my God the
room was red. I've never seen the color red
before. Like bitch, you're stupid.
You and sad to say not every Dom is a multi millionaire
billionaire. OK, some of them, they can
barely hold 2, two quarters in between their knees, but we
should go to them because they're safety.
Know what the fuck they're talking about?
Oh my God, Oh my God, just get it out the door.
Y'all get it out the door now people are probably come in and
say well we we wanted to talk about urban X so we might as
well talk about some urban X stuff.
You're nominated. What are the categories that you
are nominated? I'm nominated for hottest fetish
star. Hottest OK to to you.
I like to ask this question now and again.
Fetish. When you think of the word
fetish, what does that come to mind for you?
For me, fetish is it's what you need sexually that you can't do
without. That gets you there.
So for you. Like that's the strictest
different dictionary definition of fetish.
And that's what it means because I literally have a tattoo that
says words have meaning. So I'm like one of those
people's like, hey, I know like the gist of it.
I know how to paraphrase it. But let me give you the exact
definition because I want you to know exactly what it means, not
what it means to me. Because you need to know exactly
what the fuck you're talking about right now when you're
saying this shit to me. So I'm going to Google this
definition for you because I know what it means, but I can't
explain to you the exact dictionary definition.
Oh no, do. That right now, because you got
fucked up. So I'm that person that would be
Googling words during a whole disagreement and I you know
what? But I like that I rather have
somebody. If I'm giving up my control to
somebody, I rather them just openly say, I don't know, let me
research. Then just assuming automatically
and being so enthused. That's the word that we like to
use around the the community. It's being you're so enthused
but you are not educated. You just lost through the sauce.
Yeah, you can't do that and. It's like that's not helpful to
anyone because someone has to be in control and be sane and
rational. 1000 per say. You can't both be lost in the
sauce. Like that's how people get hurt.
Everything that we do in BDSM is dangerous.
People can actually die and get seriously psychologically fucked
up from literally every single thing that we do.
And we've heard it in the media. For sexual gratification.
And you've heard it in media, like there are cases of erotic
officiation asphyxiation. David Carradine from the Kill
Bill movies. He was infamously, you know,
unfortunately, he he was unalived due to the erotic
officiation fetish that he had. So again, it's like that's why I
asked like to you or just even somebody that's listening, you
should rethink and and think about talking about your
fetishes and talking about your kinks, because your kinks can be
your fetishes. Your fetishes can be your kinks
or they don't have to be. They don't have to be, but you
have to be. Exactly because they're they
don't have to overlap because a kink is just something you like.
A fetish is something you can't do without.
Like you need that to have a good time sexually.
And that's why it's like such a cool category.
Like I had to admit to myself that like, because I was doing
like all the promo and shit for it because it's a fans voted
award and everything. And I kept saying hottest fetish
creator and I was like no, it says * like.
And I was like, damn, I can't call myself a star, damn my
imposters and drove a show and fuck.
You know, that is funny that you said that because the star talk
is one of the things that we were talking about.
I want to say I talked about this with Gogo Zombie and Lasha
Lane most recently. But you know, the star versus
the creator, you know, title. So you would say that you are
fetish creator not star because you haven't made movies,
correct? Because I've done some program
stuff, but like, it's just like the vanilla porn category.
I mean, no, because the one I did with Daisy and Cotty, we
were both switching and stuff for each other in it.
I know. Oh yeah.
OK, so real quick. I'll tell full circle story real
quick and then remind me what we were talking about before
because I have a terrible. Memory.
I love it. So literally when I was working
at Sanctuary, I, we had a booth at AVN and that was, I started
in June and that, and that was around December and stuff or
January. No, January.
Yeah, because that's whenever he ends.
And so that's like 6-8 months later.
I met Daisy at that. I was passing around business
cards and everything and I saw her and I was like, hey, so
we're doing demos over there. It'd be really great if you play
because I'm a really big fan and like give you like a demo and,
and she was like, yeah, I'll come back for sure.
I sat at the booth and I was just like Daisy said she was
going to come. She said she was going and she
didn't come that day, but the next day she came with her now
husband and everything and she brought cameras and everything
and I got to give her demo and everything.
My boss was super happy and I was like, Oh my God.
Then cut to like a few months later, I'm nominated in a
category with her for Avian Awards for Fave da May, just
having started in June, nominated.
And then a few months after that, I shot the scene with her
for Crash Pad where we're topping each other.
And we literally at the end of that scene, we're sitting on the
couch and I'm just like, you fuck the shit out of me.
She's like, I had to go have lunch with my parents after
this. My legs are shaking.
You fuck the shit out of me, right?
We're just sitting down. I'm just like.
I love that now that is a full circle moment because again
Daisy Ducati, y'all don't know who that is.
Please go do your research. Shout out to Daisy legend
sweetheart. My God, sweet.
One of the sweetest. Beautiful.
She's so amazing and she's just so light up a room and like
just. And I love just I again, I love
how you have this black alternative look.
She has this alternative look. And that's what I love about the
whole kink Dom, you know, scene, the BDSM scene, especially for,
you know, black performers. We are really showing like,
listen, we can listen, we showing out like we can listen
to the heavy metal, we can listen to the drum and bass and
we might watch some fucked up serial killer thing, but we all
have something in common. Our pussies get wet for
something. OK yes Costa Mayhem.
Black people are involved too. So again, bringing it to the
Urban X Awards, again, Fetish, you have this fans, you know
award which is very big. Sometimes I feel like the fan
awards don't get enough love, but it is up to the fans.
It comes down to the fans. I feel like that makes you
better. It does.
It's. Great, like your peers and
everything like that, obviously, but like people are going out
there like there's this one dude.
I met him in a space with Wreck It Ralph and Freya von Dune when
they used to do their spaces and everything.
And they were like some of the first people that ever gave me a
mic and everything and listened and got to see the knowledge I
have and everything like that. And I had like 400 followers
when I first went their space. And then by the time of January,
I had like 4000 when I went to the ABN thing and like I met
this dude Isaac there and he has supported me the entire time
over the past three years, everything.
He votes me this every fucking day, every other day, whatever
it was he was posting, he voted for me.
Like I voted for you and everybody else.
I voted for you and this person. I voted for you and this and I
was retweeting. I was like, thank you.
I like coming up with something to say some other way to say
thank you because I was just so flabbergasted.
He's the sweetest person and like you don't have to like
support monetarily. Like he just he shows out every
time for every fucking award. He boasts every time and you
make sure and he will write the best comments under everything.
He's like, Oh my God, you're just living And he's the
sweetest like and I'm like, I've never met this man a day in my
life. But he is such a supporter
through and through. And it's like it's that makes
fan awards so fucking. Cool, you know, you have to like
you have to give it to your fans and and you know, being in the
sex industry, your fans are what makes or breaks you.
It really does. It's it's a lot of difference
going into the mainstream and then going and stepping into the
porn world and what like witnessing how fans are treated
compared to mainstream celebrities.
You go to like I went to the AB Ms. the first this first year
because I was nominated and again fan award.
It was great for best sex podcast.
We lost, but you know what? It was the notoriety.
I lost it. You know, but it's still like an
honor. It's still an honor, right?
To be nominated, to put your name out there, just people to
get to know you. There you go.
It's like you put AVN nominated Urban X, nominate anything that
is of that statue. Boom.
Yeah. My rates went up.
Boom, you have to, you have to, but I want people to understand
especially in your line of work femdoms, even though you are
known for having this like hard personality, y'all go harder for
the fans that put you on that platform.
And like you said, it could be the Joe Schmo that might not be
able to buy all the clips, but he's retweeting your posts.
He's sending people in every other way imaginable.
And so I just want people to understand, be kind to your
friend, be kind to the fans, but also fans, you guys have to take
this into consideration, and I'm sure you get this a lot too.
The boundaries, the boundaries need to be laid out and people
will come in my DMS after they see a certain person on the show
and they'll be like, oh, can I have their number?
Like the hell no. You can get the information that
you have. If they want to talk to you,
they will talk to you. OK, You can DM them, write them
a nice e-mail, you know, gift them something on their whip.
Ask nicely, please and thank you and pay for the content.
Stop asking for freebies. Exactly because like I'm, I'm
really fortunate that my like fans, I'm always reluctant to
say that because like I said, imposter syndrome out the ass.
But. Like my fans, they know I will
check them. I'm like, who the fuck did you
just say that shit to? Who you trying to fuck?
You lost your stupid head ass. No, no, no, no, fix that and
I'll fucking be like hey, you, you forgot to add Goddess, you
forgot to say this. What was that again?
And I'm like, oh, sorry, you know, you, you look really
pretty. I'm like, yeah, thank you.
That's that's better. I was.
That come correctly, come correctly.
You don't come to somebody'd house and you bring an empty
plate. You don't do that.
You don't go to people's houses empty handed.
You come with something, even if it's a goddamn napkin, okay?
Because if you one thing, if I recorded like super sexual ass
comments and stuff, because like, if that's your niche,
that's your niche, but that ain't what I'm playing to.
I'm not going to be like, Oh yeah, Daddy's sitting here.
No. Are you stupid?
You're going to call. You're going to call her daddy
first? OK, The hell I.
Love being called daddy, that should make me wet as fuck.
When eyes can get a straight man to call me daddy, I am God.
Well damn, I said. Daddy send her.
I whispered it though. You'll hear it later in the.
Eyes and call me daddy. Daddy, I don't even call anybody
daddy besides my daddy. So my fiance is going to laugh
at this because I don't call anybody daddy.
She broke me all. We, we have a date now because
boss lady, I took her to the dungeon that I used to like hang
out all the time. And she's like, you're one of
those few women that can make people you like me.
I would squirt it everywhere. Oh my God, Like it was a whole
thing. So all of us have to go to the
dungeon and I wasn't feeding everybody's ass.
Y'all, y'all you know what listen, I'm gonna need my
guests. I'm gonna need to stop my guests
to soliciting like themselves to me because like I I did not do
anything to cinder before. I didn't tell Cinder, you know,
you can freely just flirt with me on this show.
I didn't do this. I didn't do it y'all.
I'm. Just like this.
OK, go go, go go. Zombie did not bring.
It out to. Me.
I guess I do. All I did was sit here and be
pretty. That's it.
And ask questions. You.
Know you know what you did wrong.
Right. What did I do wrong?
Go Go and I are both Scorpios. Our birthdays are four days
apart. And I'm an Aries, I just have
ways. My mama's an Aries, Yeah.
You in trouble? No, I should be telling you.
You in trouble because Arie Aries?
Everybody likes to shit on the Aries OK but one thing you will
never shit on an Aries. We are the warriors or goddesses
of the bedroom like my. Mother is an Aries.
She's April 12th. Trust me, I am well aware.
I like being compared to your Mama.
Like. This So now you got to call me
Mama, Big Mama. I will beat you over and call
you Mama. Get the dance in the air, Mama.
I did, I love this. I hope y'all are enjoying this
conversation. I have to call you Mama.
Y'all, I don't. Know I wear lots of makeup
because I want to see that shit too.
Oh, this may, oh, these lips. It's hard to come off like it's
hard. Don't worry, it's not
impossible. I'll get.
You everything else will, you know, come off easily.
Everything else comes off easily.
I like to cry. I'll.
Get it off. I cry.
I cry prettyly. I'll get it off.
You'll get it off. It's a challenge.
I know which color I'm wearing
on Sunday. Face in the mattress, Don't make
me strap you too. Yes please.
I'm a slept first. I'm a slut for it.
I was. My log in the crash pad so you
can see that scene with Daisy if you don't have.
A yes please. I I need the cheat codes, the
links. I need to see this because I if
I'm getting. Myself in to see the scene I did
with Valentine about Betty on there too.
Y'all again, another guest is taking me.
Just I have no more words. I think this interview is over.
I think I need to go and practice what I've been
hypnotized to do probably 20 more times.
And you'll do it to your videos too.
Think of me. Oh, I will think of you.
Oh my God, y'all Lady Cinder, Lady Cinder.
I don't even know. Oh my goodness.
Like thank you. Thank you for your presence.
I I want to bring you back. I say this to every guest, but
it's the it's the female guest for me that just keep coming
back for more This I just can't get enough.
That's what it is. And I wear my blue lipstick next
time too. I'm AI used to use the hashtag
every single time. Blue is my red lip because I
wore it religiously. Cobalt blue.
See. Yes, please.
I need to see. It's a date.
Like, hey, I don't know who's
going to bum rush you on Urban X, but you just get ready.
You see this purple hair? Wait, wait, wait.
We got I'm over here, like covering the screen as if we
ain't trying to get taken down. Now she's the homo's idiot.
I'm over here like, like, how do I block?
I'm over here trying to block, block a screen.
I can't even block. Lady Cinder, I have to say thank
you for being such an amazing, amazing being on this show
today. Where can people get in touch
with you? Where can they find you?
Where can they just like to you? If you want and give me money
you can check out my loyal fans and my only fans.
My loyal fans is Lady Cinder. My only fans is Cinder 11/10 and
then you can go to crashpadtheseries.com and see
those scenes I was talking about with Valentine's on Betty and
Daisy, Ducati and myself. And then you want to catch me on
the free cheap shit because you're broke.
You can find me on Twitter, you fucking degenerate.
Lady Cinder 1110 whatever. And Instagram is Lady under
score Cinder 1110 and TikTok is Lady Cinder 11/10 as well.
Boom, 1110 is my birthday. 1110 is the birthday, so don't you
forget those you nasty pieces of.
See, I can't do it. See, I can't.
I can't do it. Every time somebody's like being
mean. Sapphire is like no.
Don't make me put a lace on you and make you do it.
I mean, if you strapped me it'd be different, but you know,
you're not that far. I know that don't.
Threaten me with a good time. Don't threaten me with a nice
time. I'm just saying, well, you know,
you would get that. See again twice in a row.
This is 2 episodes in a row that the earplugs are getting where
I'm flabbergasted to sign off. OK, so again, I'm going to keep
this. I'm keeping this in because
again, you know it's real when Sapphire can't even like sign
off on her own things. Of course I'm Megan Sapphire.
You can find me at MSRADIOSAPPH ire.com.
That's also Miz Radio Sapphire on the Instagrams.
No I don't have Twitter stop ask me TikTok fuck you and of course
subscribe to sapphires your play on YouTube.
With that said, y'all remember that safe sex is the best hot
sex. Till next time, good night.
That was the show all you sexy motherfuckers out there.
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