1 00:00:00,920 --> 00:00:04,720 In America, and in the modern West more broadly, marriage 2 00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:10,040 isn't what it used to be. In 2024, adults in the US were 3 00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:14,480 less likely to be married than at almost any point since the 4 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:17,840 Census Bureau began tracking marital status in 1940. 5 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:23,040 In 1960, the average age of first marriage was 22 for men 6 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:27,360 and 20 for women. In 2024, it was 30 for men and 7 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,880 28 for women. So on average, people are 8 00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:32,439 spending less of their life married. 9 00:00:34,480 --> 00:00:37,680 In 1950, seventy 8% of households were headed by a 10 00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:43,280 married couple. In 2024, only 47% of households 11 00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:45,720 were headed by a married couple, which is near an all time low. 12 00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:57,760 In 1970, among Americans ages 25 to 50, only 9% had never 13 00:00:57,760 --> 00:01:02,440 married. In 2018, that figure was 35 14 00:01:02,440 --> 00:01:07,000 percent. 35% of 25 to 50 year olds have never married. 15 00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:13,720 So people are marrying later, fewer people are marrying. 16 00:01:15,080 --> 00:01:20,200 And then there's divorce. Today in America, 43% of first 17 00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:25,040 marriages end in divorce. Marriage has always been hard, 18 00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:28,400 but life in modern America is making it harder. 19 00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:32,640 Fewer people want to marry, fewer people are marrying, and a 20 00:01:32,640 --> 00:01:37,080 whole lot of people who do marry fail to stay married. 21 00:01:38,560 --> 00:01:41,800 What is marriage for? What makes it work? 22 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:47,640 What causes it to fail? This morning we continue our 23 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:50,800 series in Mark's Gospel with chapter 10, verses 1 to 12. 24 00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:52,960 If you don't have a Bible, you can raise your hand and somebody 25 00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:54,640 will bring you one. And if you don't have a Bible 26 00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:56,800 because you'd like literally don't have a Bible, keep it. 27 00:01:57,040 --> 00:01:59,320 Take it home, read it. It's our gift to you. 28 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:01,480 But seriously, if you don't have one, OK, it looks like 29 00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:06,880 everybody's got one. In our passage, Jesus fields a 30 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:12,800 controversial question from religious leaders about divorce. 31 00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:17,640 To answer that question, he appeals to the reality of what 32 00:02:17,640 --> 00:02:23,640 marriage is, who created it, and what it requires of those who 33 00:02:23,640 --> 00:02:27,160 are married. Whether you're single, married, 34 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:31,880 divorced, or widowed, Jesus teaching on marriage and divorce 35 00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:36,760 is crucial for all of us. He shows us God's good design, 36 00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:42,760 and by implication He shows us what it takes to fulfill God's 37 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:45,760 design and to help others do the same. 38 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:50,960 Please follow along as I read Mark 10 verses 1 to 12. 39 00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:59,720 And he left there and went to the region of Judea and beyond 40 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:04,920 the Jordan, and crowds gathered to him again and again, as was 41 00:03:04,920 --> 00:03:10,040 his custom, He taught them. And Pharisees came up and in 42 00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:15,640 order to test him asked, is it lawful for a man to divorce his 43 00:03:15,640 --> 00:03:19,880 wife? He answered them, What did Moses 44 00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:23,680 command you? They said Moses allowed a man to 45 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:26,400 write a certificate of divorce and to send her away. 46 00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:32,120 And Jesus said to them, because of your hardness of heart, he 47 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:36,600 wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of 48 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:42,080 creation God made them male and female. 49 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:46,800 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast 50 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:49,280 to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. 51 00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:52,400 So they're no longer 2, but one flesh. 52 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:55,240 What? Therefore God has joined 53 00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:59,720 together, Let not man separate. And in the house. 54 00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:02,960 The disciples asked him again about this matter. 55 00:04:03,520 --> 00:04:07,560 And he said to them, Whoever divorces his wife and marries 56 00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:09,360 another commits adultery against her. 57 00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:14,640 And if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits 58 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:20,079 adultery. This whole passage is Jesus's 59 00:04:20,079 --> 00:04:24,720 answer to a contemporary controversy about divorce. 60 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:28,440 Because of the nature of the passage, this sermon might seem 61 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:31,240 a little more dense and teachy than normal. 62 00:04:31,240 --> 00:04:33,800 Wait a minute, you say, I thought the sermons already were 63 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:36,320 dense and teachy. Indeed they are. 64 00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:39,680 But this one all the more so. It just comes with the 65 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:41,880 territory. We're going to have to do a bit 66 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:46,240 more work to both understand the historical background and to 67 00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:49,000 connect Jesus teaching here with what the rest of Scripture 68 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:52,040 teaches about divorce, marriage, and remarriage. 69 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:56,920 Still, my basic task will be to explain and apply this passage. 70 00:04:57,320 --> 00:05:00,800 Here's Jesus's main point. I couldn't fit it into one 71 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:09,320 sentence, so here's two Marriage is a lifelong, exclusive 72 00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:14,720 covenant woven into the fabric of creation. 73 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:22,160 Divorce is only permitted when the marriage covenant has been 74 00:05:22,160 --> 00:05:24,200 broken. I'll say that again. 75 00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:31,800 Marriage is a lifelong, exclusive covenant woven into 76 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:37,000 the fabric of creation. Divorce is only permitted when 77 00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:40,440 the marriage covenant has been broken. 78 00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:46,240 We'll unfold Jesus reasoning here in three parts, which walk 79 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:48,600 through the passage pretty much in order with a little bit of 80 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:53,680 overlap between each point. Point #1 the authority of 81 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:56,560 creation. We see this in verses one to 82 00:05:56,560 --> 00:06:04,080 six, the authority of creation. Verse one sets the scene. 83 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:09,280 And he left there and went to the region of Judea and beyond 84 00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:12,400 the Jordan. And crowds gathered to him again 85 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:14,520 and again, as was his custom, He taught them. 86 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:17,800 As we've seen throughout this part of Mark's Gospel, Jesus is 87 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:19,720 continuing his journey toward Jerusalem. 88 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:22,880 And as he makes that journey and he gets down to the region of 89 00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:25,800 Judea and around the Transjordan, he continues to 90 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:29,080 teach large crowds. Out of this crowd, some 91 00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:32,480 religious leaders come to him with a controversial question, 92 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:36,120 verse 2. And Pharisees came up and in 93 00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:41,760 order to test him asked is it lawful for a man to divorce his 94 00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:45,400 wife? Now why this question is a test 95 00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:47,760 is not 100% clear from the context. 96 00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:50,960 It's possible that the Pharisees are trying to get Jesus in 97 00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:53,560 trouble with the authorities by getting him to weigh in on 98 00:06:53,560 --> 00:06:57,640 Herodias's unlawful divorce. Speaking out against that was 99 00:06:57,640 --> 00:07:00,920 part of what got John the Baptist imprisoned and beheaded. 100 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:03,480 But I think it's more likely that they're simply trying to 101 00:07:03,480 --> 00:07:05,600 throw him a curveball. Here's a tough question. 102 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,680 Here's a matter of dispute. They're trying to catch him out. 103 00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:09,280 They're trying to somehow trip him up. 104 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:13,320 But what exactly are they asking here? 105 00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:16,720 It's crucial to recognize that our gospel account is highly 106 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:19,680 compressed. It's highly abbreviated. 107 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:24,360 It's not a verbatim transcript of an entire exchange, like 108 00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:28,040 minutes in a court case. Instead, it takes certain 109 00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:30,160 historical background knowledge for granted. 110 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:32,920 And that makes sense. The first readers of this gospel 111 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:36,080 would have had a whole lot more knowledge of what Jewish life 112 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:39,600 around the time of Jesus was like, and so we have to work a 113 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:42,880 little bit to understand exactly what question they were asking. 114 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:48,440 All Jews of Jesus's day acknowledged some grounds for 115 00:07:48,440 --> 00:07:52,040 divorce. No Jewish thinker known to 116 00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:56,400 history categorically prohibited divorce. 117 00:07:56,520 --> 00:08:00,680 Instead, the Pharisees are asking Jesus about what are 118 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:03,960 valid grounds for divorce. It's like if someone asked you 119 00:08:03,960 --> 00:08:06,600 today, is it legal for a 16 year old to drink? 120 00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:12,760 Well, I hope so because they need water to live, but of 121 00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:15,800 course that's not the question. Oh, legal for a 16 year old to 122 00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:18,320 drink alcohol? You just say drink because 123 00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:20,000 that's shorthand. We understand what you mean. 124 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,160 There's shared cultural knowledge. 125 00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:23,240 It would be a question. Well, no, the drinking age in 126 00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:26,280 America is 21, and even in some other places it might be 18. 127 00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:29,040 But that's irrelevant, right? A 16 year old can't drink. 128 00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:32,559 If you just say a 16 year old can't drink, you know someone 129 00:08:32,559 --> 00:08:34,320 from 300 years in the future might go. 130 00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:39,120 A 1616 year old can't drink. What sort of bizarre torture are 131 00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:41,960 they practicing on 16 year olds? No, there's an understood 132 00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:45,040 qualification. Can't drink alcohol? 133 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:47,400 Everyone listening in would supply that. 134 00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:51,200 And so here in the Pharisees question there's an assumed 135 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:55,040 qualification. In the Judaism of Jesus day, 136 00:08:55,560 --> 00:08:59,280 there were two main schools of thought regarding divorce, and 137 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:02,320 they differed over how to interpret a crucial phrase in 138 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:07,680 Deuteronomy 24 verse 1. As a whole, Deuteronomy 24, 139 00:09:07,680 --> 00:09:12,520 verses 1 to 4 regulates what happens after a divorce. 140 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:18,640 But we need to focus on verse one, when a man takes a wife and 141 00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:21,560 marries her. If then she finds no favor in 142 00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:27,280 his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he 143 00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:30,280 writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand 144 00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:33,240 and sends her out of his house, dot, dot, dot, then the passage 145 00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:34,680 goes on. That's all set up. 146 00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:38,320 That's all the circumstances that this legal ruling is 147 00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:40,760 addressing. Now that phrase in verse one is 148 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:48,640 literally a matter of indecency or indecency of a matter, and 149 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:51,560 there were two schools of thought in Jesus day about how 150 00:09:51,560 --> 00:09:55,400 to interpret that phrase. Followers of the Rabbi Sham I 151 00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:59,800 held that Deuteronomy 24 one was speaking about divorce only for 152 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:03,720 a matter of indecency, which they took to mean sexual 153 00:10:03,720 --> 00:10:07,720 unfaithfulness. But followers of Rabbi Hillel 154 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:12,640 had a new position that had recently come onto the scene and 155 00:10:12,640 --> 00:10:15,520 became popular very quickly. It even became the majority view 156 00:10:15,520 --> 00:10:20,320 very quickly. They understood indecency and a 157 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:23,280 matter to be two different things. 158 00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:27,160 It's very much a looking for a loophole kind of reading. 159 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,520 A matter of indecency is one thing. 160 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:31,880 Ah, but it's 2 words. It's a matter and it's 161 00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:35,440 indecency. So if indecency is one thing and 162 00:10:35,600 --> 00:10:39,640 a matter is another, then Moses must be talking about a husband 163 00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:42,320 divorcing his wife for any matter. 164 00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:47,600 There's indecency and then there's a matter that is for any 165 00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:52,120 'cause that position, which had become the majority position by 166 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:56,800 Jesus day, essentially gave a husband access to no fault 167 00:10:56,800 --> 00:11:00,280 divorce. Some Jews in Jesus day said a 168 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:03,400 man could divorce his wife if she burned his dinner. 169 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:05,800 Not making that up. There's a historical record of 170 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:07,840 that. Some said a man could divorce 171 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:12,800 his wife quote if he found another fairer than she. 172 00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:18,960 The historian Josephus casually reports about himself at this 173 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:22,240 time. I divorced my wife not liking 174 00:11:22,240 --> 00:11:27,240 her behavior. So that type of callous, casual, 175 00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:31,640 no fault divorce was taking place in Jesus day and on the 176 00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:35,800 basis of a new view that was now the majority view of how to 177 00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:38,480 interpret Deuteronomy 24. One, it really opened the 178 00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:41,280 floodgates for divorce. It allowed divorce for any 179 00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:44,880 cause. And that's exactly what the 180 00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:49,080 Pharisees question assumes. They're asking is it lawful for 181 00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:53,760 a man to divorce his wife for any 'cause when we hear their 182 00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:55,640 question, we should supply those words. 183 00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:58,040 Now if you're a little bit skeptical of this kind of 184 00:11:58,040 --> 00:11:59,960 historical background reconstruction, if you're 185 00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:02,360 thinking, oh, but I haven't read the Jewish literature, I don't 186 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:03,760 really know, maybe you're making this up. 187 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:05,360 Maybe the scholars you've studied are wrong. 188 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:12,280 Well, Matthew 19 verse 3, the parallel to our passage supplies 189 00:12:12,280 --> 00:12:15,200 that exact phrase. Mark understands it. 190 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:19,280 Matthew says it. So it's it's the same question. 191 00:12:19,520 --> 00:12:21,960 It's just if you're listening in, in Jesus day, you know, oh, 192 00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:24,320 they're asking about any matter divorce. 193 00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:25,760 You just know that's what they're asking. 194 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:29,000 Matthew says it explicitly and Mark it's understood. 195 00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:32,040 So they're asking Jesus to weigh in on this debate. 196 00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:35,800 Is is he a matter of indecency guy like the minority or is he 197 00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:38,000 in any cause guy like the majority? 198 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:41,960 And this brings us to Jesus initial reply. 199 00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:44,520 He flips the question back on them. 200 00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:48,400 Verses 3 and four. He answered them. 201 00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:55,960 What did Moses command you? They said Moses allowed a man to 202 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,600 write a certificate of divorce and to send her away. 203 00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:02,280 So Jesus asks the Pharisees what do the scriptures teach? 204 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,840 And now that we know the context, they appeal to the 205 00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:08,400 passage. We would expect Deuteronomy 24 206 00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:10,760 verse 1. And so they summarize it. 207 00:13:11,440 --> 00:13:14,760 But at least as recorded here, the information we have, it 208 00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:16,760 doesn't look like they give away their position. 209 00:13:17,520 --> 00:13:20,560 I think it's safe to assume they probably held the majority view, 210 00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:24,760 but they don't seem to take a stand on the disputed phrase. 211 00:13:24,920 --> 00:13:27,040 Instead they just kind of summarize the passage and kick 212 00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:30,760 the ball back to Jesus. Well, Jesus Moses says a man can 213 00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:32,840 write a certificate of divorce and send her away. 214 00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:39,480 So what do you do with that one clue to how the debate is going 215 00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:44,320 to play out? Jesus asks them what did Moses 216 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:50,400 command you? And they reply with Moses aloud. 217 00:13:51,240 --> 00:13:54,040 Jesus is asking what's commanded. 218 00:13:54,680 --> 00:13:57,360 They reply with what's permitted. 219 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:02,000 They're being evasive. Jesus is asking for something 220 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:05,640 slightly different than what they're willing to answer. 221 00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:10,720 I should say just a little bit more on Deuteronomy 24 versus 1 222 00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:12,320 to 4. For background. 223 00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:16,280 The passage is complicated. It is about what to do if a 224 00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:20,240 woman who has been divorced, then remarries and then is 225 00:14:20,240 --> 00:14:22,520 divorced again. We won't get into all those 226 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:26,080 details, but it's crucial to know that in that passage and 227 00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:28,840 throughout Jewish history afterward, a certificate of 228 00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:32,200 divorce was itself permission to remarry. 229 00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:36,080 The very wording of a divorce certificate in Jesus day was she 230 00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:39,280 is free to marry whomever she wishes. 231 00:14:39,680 --> 00:14:42,720 In the ancient Jewish world and the Greco Roman world more 232 00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:46,280 broadly, it was universally agreed that permission to 233 00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:48,720 divorce was permission to remarry. 234 00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:52,040 If you were legitimately divorced, then you had freedom 235 00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:55,240 to remarry. So in this passage in 236 00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:59,800 Deuteronomy, it's not, strictly speaking, permitting divorce. 237 00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:03,400 Instead, it's regulating it and limiting its impacts. 238 00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:05,960 It's certainly not commanding divorce. 239 00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:08,600 There is no command here to divorce. 240 00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:11,560 And before we move on, I think it's worth clarifying that the 241 00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:15,040 phrase matter of indecency, like really does refer to sexual 242 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:17,200 immorality. Jesus teaching elsewhere makes 243 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:21,560 that plain when he's engaging the same debut and other dispute 244 00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:23,160 or debate in other parts of the Gospels. 245 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:27,400 He clarifies a matter of sexual immorality is what Deuteronomy 246 00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:31,440 24 one is referring to. So how does Jesus reply? 247 00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:34,880 Here? We see the beginnings of his 248 00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:40,520 reply in verses 5 and 6. And Jesus said to them, because 249 00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:44,560 of your hardness of heart, He wrote you this commandment. 250 00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:49,440 But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and 251 00:15:49,440 --> 00:15:52,360 female. Notice that Jesus does not 252 00:15:52,360 --> 00:15:56,280 disagree with Moses's teaching. He doesn't dismiss Moses's 253 00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:59,760 teaching. Instead, he sets it in the 254 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:04,960 context of creation. However we understand its exact 255 00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:09,200 parameters. Divorce is a concession to sin. 256 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:11,840 It's meant to limit the damage of sin. 257 00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:14,360 It's only legitimate when something has gone terribly 258 00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:16,360 wrong. More on that and .3. 259 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:20,760 Jesus's point is that you cannot learn God's instructions for 260 00:16:20,760 --> 00:16:23,720 marriage by looking at the instructions for what to do when 261 00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:25,720 something has gone terribly wrong. 262 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:30,160 You don't learn to fly an airplane by following the 263 00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:32,080 instructions for how to make a crash landing. 264 00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:38,320 You don't learn how to win a battle in war by training for 265 00:16:38,320 --> 00:16:40,520 how to make a successful retreat. 266 00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:45,760 Jesus is saying the same is true for marriage and divorce. 267 00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:49,840 You have to look to the purpose. You have to look to the pattern. 268 00:16:49,840 --> 00:16:54,240 You have to look to what the institution requires and demands 269 00:16:54,520 --> 00:17:00,080 and compels. And so he says, this concession 270 00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:03,480 was given as a result of hardness of heart. 271 00:17:04,079 --> 00:17:08,240 It was given to limit the impact of how people's hardness of 272 00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:13,000 heart would damage each other. It's worth meditating on this 273 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,240 week. In what ways is your heart 274 00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:19,400 hardened toward God, hardened toward his commandments, 275 00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:23,240 hardened toward other people? What damage might that hardness 276 00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:28,280 of heart do if you don't labor to soften your heart by God's 277 00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:30,200 Word and by meditating on his grace? 278 00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:35,680 So Jesus appeals to creation. In order to begin to uncover 279 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:39,040 God's design for marriage and the limits that God sets to 280 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:41,800 divorce. Jesus appeals to the authority 281 00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:46,280 of creation. He first quotes Genesis 127, the 282 00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:49,920 scriptural passage that teaches us about God's direct, special 283 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:52,440 act of creating the first human beings. 284 00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:55,720 We'll consider more details in the next point, but for now I 285 00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:58,280 just want to notice the move Jesus makes. 286 00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:03,960 Notice the basis he appeals to. Jesus is teaching that God's 287 00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:08,040 creative act has an abiding validity. 288 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:13,280 God's created order has an abiding authority. 289 00:18:13,600 --> 00:18:15,840 God created humanity, male and female. 290 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:20,400 That teaches us that marriage is a natural human institution 291 00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:25,560 created by divine design. It fits our very nature as male 292 00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:28,840 and female. To use some technical language, 293 00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:32,120 we can say that in the original act of creation, God created a 294 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:38,480 single sexually dimorphic pair, one man, one woman. 295 00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:41,200 If you want to learn what marriage is, you can discern it 296 00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:44,160 from the complementary bodies that God gave to the first two 297 00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:47,080 human beings. The nature of marriage is built 298 00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:50,080 into how God created us and what he created us. 299 00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:54,880 As we are male and female, capable of becoming 1 flesh and 300 00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:59,160 bringing a new life into the world, so marriage is not a a 301 00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:03,000 human invention but a divine institution. 302 00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:07,080 Marriage is not a human creation, but a divine 303 00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:11,240 provision. Marriage is not an arbitrary, 304 00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:14,600 culturally relative convention that we could sort of adopt or 305 00:19:14,600 --> 00:19:19,440 tweak or dismiss as we will. Instead, it's something defined 306 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:22,360 for us by our very created natures. 307 00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:27,480 Scripture and nature speak with one voice about what marriage 308 00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:31,920 is. So to understand how marriage 309 00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:38,120 and divorce fit together, you have to constrain divorce with 310 00:19:38,120 --> 00:19:42,240 the created nature of marriage. Let the definition of marriage 311 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:47,800 limit divorce. Don't let permission to divorce 312 00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:52,080 redefine marriage. Look to God's original design, 313 00:19:52,080 --> 00:19:55,240 His blueprint, His purpose. Look to the authority of 314 00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:58,000 creation itself. Jesus said from the beginning of 315 00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:01,200 creation God made them male and female. 316 00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:04,400 Now his Jesus quotation of Genesis 127 has all kinds of 317 00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:07,040 implications for how we should think about our lives as male 318 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,840 and female, as men and women. I can only touch on a couple 319 00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:16,280 briefly here. 1 crucial point is that sexual difference is a gift 320 00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:18,600 from God to be received with Thanksgiving. 321 00:20:19,120 --> 00:20:23,080 That God has created human beings in two sexual kinds is 322 00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:26,080 not a burden to be refused. It's not a hurdle to be 323 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:28,400 overcome. To be a man is a gift. 324 00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,920 To be a woman is a gift. Whether you ever marry or not, 325 00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:35,240 whether you ever bear children or not, being a man and being a 326 00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:38,240 woman is a gift. When we talk about what makes 327 00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:41,920 human life unique and valuable and enjoyable, we should include 328 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:45,000 and highlight men and women's sexual difference rather than 329 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,840 trying to erase it. To give just one important 330 00:20:47,840 --> 00:20:53,400 example, a woman's capacity to bear new life within herself is 331 00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:57,360 not an obstacle standing in the way of some other greater good. 332 00:20:58,400 --> 00:21:01,360 Instead, it's a miracle, and it's a marvel. 333 00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:05,040 It is an astonishing power that should be celebrated and 334 00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:09,480 cherished. Further, sexual difference is 335 00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:14,640 something we must submit to and align our wills and desires 336 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:16,960 with. Sexual difference is not a 337 00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:22,560 boundary we can or should seek to erase or even crossover. 338 00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:28,560 We did not make ourselves and we cannot remake ourselves. 339 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:32,680 We can't trade ourselves in for a different model. 340 00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:37,800 Sexual difference is given by God and it is a good gift. 341 00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:42,000 If you're not a believer in Jesus, I want to challenge you 342 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,800 here and kind of point to some of some of the deep divides in 343 00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:48,640 our cultural narratives. Our culture is filled with myths 344 00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:52,600 of self creation, and I mean myths in a sense of stories we 345 00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:55,480 live by and myths also in the sense that they're not true. 346 00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:59,840 In a Supreme Court decision in 1992, Justice Anthony Kennedy 347 00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:04,720 wrote at the heart of liberty is the right to define one's own 348 00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:07,520 concept of existence, of meaning, of the universe, and of 349 00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:11,600 the mystery of human life. That doesn't hold water. 350 00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:18,040 We didn't create ourselves, and only the one who creates has the 351 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:21,080 right to define. And so the meaning and mystery 352 00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:24,520 of human life isn't something we define for ourselves, but 353 00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:28,640 something we discover that's built in by God. 354 00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:32,720 Freedom comes not from remaking ourselves according to our inner 355 00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:35,360 whims. Instead, freedom comes from 356 00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:38,760 submitting to who God has made us to be, and from receiving 357 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:41,520 with gratitude what he has freely given us. 358 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:48,320 Freedom comes from submitting to the authority of creation, and 359 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:52,200 creation authoritatively. Reveals point to the reality of 360 00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:56,200 marriage. The reality of marriage. 361 00:22:57,040 --> 00:23:00,280 That's what Jesus holds up for our view in verses 6 through 9. 362 00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:07,840 The reality of marriage verses 6 through 9, The basis of Jesus 363 00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:13,520 teaching on when divorce is permitted is what marriage is. 364 00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:18,320 Specifically, marriage is an exclusive, lifelong covenant 365 00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:20,520 woven into the fabric of creation. 366 00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:24,240 Look again at verse 6. But from the beginning of 367 00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:27,760 creation God made them male and female. 368 00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:30,840 This teaches us that marriage is part of God's created order. 369 00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:35,240 It's part of his original pre fall design and God still has 370 00:23:35,240 --> 00:23:39,160 good purposes for marriage in this created though fallen order 371 00:23:39,160 --> 00:23:42,000 that we live in. The fact that God created us 372 00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,440 male and female points to the nature of marriage. 373 00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:48,280 A male body and a female body are capable of joining in a 374 00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:52,080 unique kind of intimate union, and that physical union doesn't 375 00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:56,120 exist in a vacuum. Marriage is a total union, not 376 00:23:56,120 --> 00:23:58,600 only of two bodies, but of two lives. 377 00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:01,760 Marriage is an exclusive partnership. 378 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:07,640 Marriage is a total commitment. Marriage is a comprehensive gift 379 00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:13,520 of oneself to another self. Marriage is therefore a 380 00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:18,040 permanent commitment. It's not a contract you can 381 00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:22,080 nullify at will. Jesus goes on to cite another 382 00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:25,680 passage from Genesis, this time chapter 2, verse 24. 383 00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:29,600 That's in verses 7 and 8. Therefore a man shall leave his 384 00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:32,680 father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall 385 00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:36,280 become one flesh. So they are no longer 2, but one 386 00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:40,040 flesh. According to Genesis 224, 387 00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:42,560 marriage establishes a new loyalty. 388 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:46,720 Every marriage founds a new family. 389 00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:50,840 While our family circumstances before marriage can be very 390 00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:55,320 different and diverse, marriage is always an act of both 391 00:24:55,560 --> 00:25:01,920 separating and uniting, both leaving and joining. 392 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,520 When a couple pronounces the vows of marriage, they found a 393 00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:10,080 political body. They bind themselves to a common 394 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:13,240 destiny by their sovereign declaration. 395 00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:17,960 I do. To leave father and mother is to 396 00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:22,320 found a new family. What does that require of a man 397 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:27,720 who is marrying? It requires him to hold fast to 398 00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:32,000 his wife, you might say, to hang on to her for dear life. 399 00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:35,600 Because she now is his dear life. 400 00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:38,440 Her life is his. His life is hers. 401 00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,800 Her body is his. His body is hers. 402 00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:44,560 His body now includes her body. Whatever benefits her benefits 403 00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:48,720 him. Whatever harms her harms him. 404 00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:55,640 As marvellous and mysterious as marriage is, it is itself a 405 00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:58,560 pointer to something even more marvellous and mysterious. 406 00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:02,280 And it's in this picture of two becoming one, this deeper 407 00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:06,240 transcendent unity, We see how marriage points beyond itself. 408 00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:08,880 Paul instructs husbands and wives about how to live together 409 00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:12,440 at the end of Ephesians 5. And at the end of that passage, 410 00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:17,160 Paul quotes Genesis 224 just like Jesus, and he says this 411 00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:22,040 mystery is profound. And I am saying that it refers 412 00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:25,760 to Christ and the church to becoming one. 413 00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:28,800 Flesh refers to Christ and the church. 414 00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:31,640 It's about Christ and the church. 415 00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:35,040 Marriage points beyond itself to Christ and the church. 416 00:26:35,120 --> 00:26:38,400 How? We need to start by recognizing 417 00:26:38,400 --> 00:26:41,360 that creation is ordered to communion. 418 00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:44,840 God created us to have communion with Him. 419 00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:48,160 God created us to share in an intimate union and fellowship 420 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:50,440 with him. And our sin ruptured that 421 00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:53,280 fellowship. Our sin separated us from God. 422 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:57,240 Our sin is the original divorce. God was the perfect husband. 423 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:00,560 We had no cause to leave him. And yet our sin has divorced us 424 00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:03,000 from him. We're separated. 425 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,760 We're cut off or alienated. We don't live in the kind of 426 00:27:05,760 --> 00:27:08,520 intimate fellowship with God we were created for. 427 00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:13,000 And that's one angle that runs through all of Scripture on His 428 00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,600 plan of redemption. God sent his Son into the world 429 00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:18,600 to redeem his bride. God sent his Son into the world 430 00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:21,920 to pay the debt of our sins so that we could be reconciled to 431 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,240 Him, so that we could be reunited to him. 432 00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:28,800 God raised Jesus from the dead to prove that his sacrifice was 433 00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:33,200 sufficient and to bring Jesus himself as our guarantee into 434 00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:35,440 the new kind of life that won't end. 435 00:27:35,720 --> 00:27:39,680 A new life capable of having unending fellowship with God. 436 00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:43,920 And when we look forward to being with him forever, the 437 00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:49,600 consummation of our salvation is a greater intimacy that marriage 438 00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:53,080 is only a pointer to. It's an even deeper intimacy. 439 00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:56,680 It's an even fuller, closer union. 440 00:27:57,040 --> 00:27:59,840 That's what God has created us for. 441 00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:02,080 Marriage is a good gift. It's bound up in the created 442 00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:05,000 order, but it has an end date. It doesn't continue into the new 443 00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:06,040 creation. Why? 444 00:28:06,440 --> 00:28:10,000 Because marriage is a pointer. It's a signpost, to use kind of 445 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:13,280 technical language. It's a type like David points 446 00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:16,200 forward to King Jesus, like the sacrifices point forward to the 447 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:20,080 cross. Marriage itself points forward 448 00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:23,200 to the greater union we'll all have with God in the new 449 00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:25,480 creation. If you're hearing you're not a 450 00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:30,320 believer in Jesus, being reconciled to God and newly 451 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:35,760 united to him through Christ is a far more urgent priority than 452 00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:39,160 getting married or restoring a marriage or fixing a marriage. 453 00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:42,560 You need to repent and believe in Jesus in order to enter into 454 00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:45,520 that union. And when you do, if you do, you 455 00:28:45,520 --> 00:28:49,960 have a whole new motivation and means and basis for transforming 456 00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:52,880 all the human relationships that you are in. 457 00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:56,560 Marriage is good because it's a good gift woven into creation 458 00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:59,520 itself. Marriage is also good because 459 00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:03,360 it's a billboard for the gospel, which means we as Christians 460 00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:06,280 have all the more reason to preserve and protect and promote 461 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:10,280 thriving marriages. So how do we do that? 462 00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:13,520 How do we preserve the goods of marriage? 463 00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:17,160 Jesus tells us, at least implicitly, in verses 8 and 9. 464 00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:20,800 Verse 8. So there are no longer 2, but 465 00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:27,160 one flesh in marriage. 2 lives are joined into one. 466 00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:30,400 That is not something you can sever at will. 467 00:29:30,840 --> 00:29:33,960 That's not a decision you can reverse or undo whenever it 468 00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:36,720 seems like the more convenient option. 469 00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:40,800 And so in verse 9, Jesus arrives at his ethical bottom line. 470 00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:44,000 Here's kind of his main point in the whole conversation, verse 9. 471 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:48,680 What God has joined together let not man separate. 472 00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:51,680 How has God joined together a married couple? 473 00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:56,880 Well, it's by the design of His creation, it's by His 474 00:29:56,880 --> 00:30:00,400 providential gift of each husband and each wife to each 475 00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:06,080 other, and it's by His witness to each couple's wedding vows. 476 00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:15,280 Marriage is a human bond built by divine design and backed by 477 00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:19,120 divine sanction. Marriage is not a contract, but 478 00:30:19,120 --> 00:30:22,240 a covenant. It's a covenant designed by God, 479 00:30:22,240 --> 00:30:26,440 ordained by God, and witnessed and overseen by God. 480 00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:31,560 Whenever you enter a contract, say you're going to lease a car 481 00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:36,120 to own it, you pledge to give only what the contract 482 00:30:36,120 --> 00:30:40,600 explicitly requires, this many payments over this amount of 483 00:30:40,600 --> 00:30:43,880 time, and the car belongs to you and the contract goes bye bye 484 00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:46,360 right? The car dealer and the bank 485 00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:50,160 making the loan do not care what you do at 8:00 PM on a Tuesday, 486 00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:51,840 as long as they get that monthly payment. 487 00:30:52,200 --> 00:30:55,040 That is their sole concern in this contract. 488 00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:58,920 But in the marriage covenant, you pledge your whole self. 489 00:30:59,680 --> 00:31:02,080 It very much does matter to your spouse what you do at 8:00 PM on 490 00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:03,800 a Tuesday. It matters in a whole way. 491 00:31:03,800 --> 00:31:06,000 It never mattered to anybody else before what you do at 8:00 492 00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:09,760 PM on a Tuesday. You pledge all that you own and 493 00:31:09,760 --> 00:31:11,520 all that you have. You pledge your life. 494 00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:15,080 You pledge yourself. So marriage is not a contract 495 00:31:15,080 --> 00:31:18,240 that could be dissolved at will, but a covenant that may only be 496 00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:20,440 dissolved when the covenant itself is broken. 497 00:31:20,440 --> 00:31:25,480 Again more on that in .3 but for now Jesus main point is clear. 498 00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:30,360 Let not man separate marriages should stay together. 499 00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:33,000 Jesus is against any matter divorce. 500 00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:35,560 Jesus is against no fault divorce. 501 00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:39,720 Jesus permits divorce only under very specific circumstances. 502 00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:44,280 In the context of this debate over Deuteronomy 24 verse 1, he 503 00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:48,320 sides with those who see it as permitting divorce only for 504 00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:50,880 sexual unfaithfulness. Why? 505 00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:55,920 Because sexual unfaithfulness breaks the covenant. 506 00:31:57,240 --> 00:32:00,560 Now we know explicitly that Jesus permitted divorce for 507 00:32:00,560 --> 00:32:03,160 sexual unfaithfulness because parallel statements in the 508 00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:07,160 Gospels say so explicitly, like Matthew's version of our passage 509 00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:09,520 in Matthew 19 nine or his teaching in the Sermon on the 510 00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:13,160 Mountain, Matthew 532. So here's Jesus main teaching 511 00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:16,000 for us. What God has joined together, 512 00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:21,480 let not man separate. Note that he doesn't say what 513 00:32:21,480 --> 00:32:24,760 God has joined together. No man can separate. 514 00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:27,720 Instead, he warns us not to separate it. 515 00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:32,080 Jesus's point is not that marriage is ontologically 516 00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:36,760 incapable of being dissolved. Instead, he's warning against 517 00:32:36,760 --> 00:32:42,680 dissolving it wrongly. If we want to avoid divorces 518 00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:47,680 that Jesus would not approve, we have to work to build marriages 519 00:32:48,080 --> 00:32:50,840 whose character would please him. 520 00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:56,320 Everything that unites a husband and wife strengthens their 521 00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:59,760 marriage. Everything that divides a 522 00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:03,080 husband and wife threatens their marriage. 523 00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:08,160 Marriage is a tremendous gift. In marriage, each spouse makes a 524 00:33:08,240 --> 00:33:11,080 total gift of themselves to the other. 525 00:33:11,680 --> 00:33:16,040 That's a high privilege and it's a sobering responsibility. 526 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:19,360 The traditional wedding vows in the Anglican Book of Common 527 00:33:19,360 --> 00:33:22,600 Prayer beautifully capture this. If I happen to tear up while 528 00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:25,360 saying them in a moment, sorry. Just know that I do that every 529 00:33:25,360 --> 00:33:27,440 time I lead a wedding and I leave the couple and saying 530 00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:29,240 their vows. So you just get to see what 531 00:33:29,240 --> 00:33:34,440 happens at every wedding I do. I husband take you wife to be my 532 00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:41,120 wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for 533 00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:49,440 better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in 534 00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:59,560 health, to lead love, and to cherish till death us do part 535 00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:02,960 according to God's holy ordinance. 536 00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:09,960 And thereto I pledge you myself. Those wedding vows are a mirror. 537 00:34:11,199 --> 00:34:14,480 If you're married, when you hear those vows, you should see 538 00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:18,800 yourself in a comprehensive and unflattering light. 539 00:34:20,639 --> 00:34:27,480 Every wedding vow summons death as its standard and limit. 540 00:34:27,760 --> 00:34:31,520 This is a permanent promise. I don't know how many years I 541 00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:36,080 have left, but all the years I have left I give you. 542 00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:40,000 That's the wedding vow. The wedding vow is not only a 543 00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:44,760 gift of self, it's also a death to self. 544 00:34:45,920 --> 00:34:49,840 The wedding vow pledges that you will put to death every 545 00:34:49,840 --> 00:34:53,760 interest, every desire, every attraction, every dream, every 546 00:34:53,760 --> 00:34:57,480 ambition that would threaten or harm your spouse. 547 00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:04,280 Every wedding vow pledges absolute loyalty, total 548 00:35:04,280 --> 00:35:09,360 commitment, unending fidelity until you have no more of any of 549 00:35:09,360 --> 00:35:12,240 that left to give because you are dead. 550 00:35:14,720 --> 00:35:17,760 The wedding vow is a blank check. 551 00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:24,440 When a groom vows himself to his bride, he promises to provide 552 00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:28,120 for her in every way she needs provision to care for her in 553 00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:33,400 every way she needs care. He promises to die to himself 554 00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:41,280 whenever her good demands it. When you make that vow, you have 555 00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:43,080 no idea how much it will cost you. 556 00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:49,080 When you make that vow, you have no idea when God will call those 557 00:35:49,080 --> 00:35:53,920 costs due. There you are, all dressed up, 558 00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:57,480 looking the best you ever have in your life, with all your 559 00:35:57,480 --> 00:36:05,200 friends and family beaming at you, and you have no clue what 560 00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:08,440 sacrifices you are signing up to make. 561 00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:14,640 Not the faintest idea. That's the promise, that's the 562 00:36:14,640 --> 00:36:19,560 vow, and God's grace is sufficient to sustain you in 563 00:36:19,560 --> 00:36:22,920 whatever ways He demands. That you die to yourself for 564 00:36:22,920 --> 00:36:26,280 your spouse is good. So what? 565 00:36:26,280 --> 00:36:28,560 God has joined together, let not man separate. 566 00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:34,520 What is it that divides and therefore threatens a marriage? 567 00:36:34,720 --> 00:36:37,680 Here is a non exhaustive list. You could add plenty of items to 568 00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:44,160 it. Resentment, bitterness, refusal 569 00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:49,560 to forgive, avoiding conflict to preserve a superficial peace 570 00:36:49,560 --> 00:36:55,240 while the issues get worse. Slowly starting to despise your 571 00:36:55,240 --> 00:36:59,840 spouse for their faults rather than graciously, patiently 572 00:36:59,840 --> 00:37:02,520 working for their growth and conformity to Christ. 573 00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:06,720 Becoming so busy that you're functionally sealed off from 574 00:37:06,720 --> 00:37:09,160 each other, living separate lives. 575 00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:13,360 We're casually pursuing individual interests in a way 576 00:37:13,360 --> 00:37:16,840 that eats away at your ability to spend time together and 577 00:37:17,120 --> 00:37:23,480 communicate and work together. If you're married, what is 578 00:37:23,480 --> 00:37:28,680 dividing you from your spouse right now, and what can you do 579 00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:33,720 to close that gap? On the flip side, the positive 580 00:37:33,720 --> 00:37:38,080 side, what unifies and therefore strengthens a marriage? 581 00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:44,120 Here's a non exhaustive list. Kindness, forbearance, 582 00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:50,200 forgiveness, self sacrifice, Regular cheerful acts of 583 00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:53,240 service. Joyfully putting your spouse's 584 00:37:53,240 --> 00:37:55,520 interests before your own, offering them regular 585 00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:59,000 encouragement, asking your spouse how they're doing and 586 00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:02,560 giving them time and space to speak freely. 587 00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:09,200 Nurturing and cherishing. Here's a good word on that from 588 00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:12,080 Calvin. John Calvin wrote, Let the 589 00:38:12,080 --> 00:38:16,120 husband and wife therefore live together in such a manner that 590 00:38:16,120 --> 00:38:21,160 each shall cherish the other in the same manner as if they were 591 00:38:21,160 --> 00:38:25,840 the half of themselves. In general, what unites and 592 00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:27,600 strengthens a marriage? Communication. 593 00:38:28,360 --> 00:38:31,920 Communicating honestly. Communicating gently. 594 00:38:32,720 --> 00:38:35,840 Communicating beyond the transactional details of life. 595 00:38:37,360 --> 00:38:39,120 Communicating in a way that helps you understand each 596 00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:45,000 other's hearts and minds and to be more unified in heart and 597 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:48,000 mind. If your marriage is hard, don't 598 00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:50,680 hide. Bring it out into the light. 599 00:38:51,040 --> 00:38:54,640 Don't settle for a stagnant status quo. 600 00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:58,080 Don't settle for retreating into your own corners. 601 00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:01,360 Don't settle for distance creeping in between you as the 602 00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:06,440 years and decades tick by. Instead, seek help, see counsel 603 00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:10,640 from an elder, open up to a trusted friend, and brothers and 604 00:39:10,640 --> 00:39:12,280 sisters, members of Trinity Baptist Church. 605 00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:16,640 Consider the role we all get to play, the role we all should 606 00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:18,720 play in strengthening and sustaining each other's 607 00:39:18,720 --> 00:39:21,000 marriages. That holds whether you're 608 00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:23,960 single, widowed, divorced, married. 609 00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:29,480 Consider Hebrews 13, four. Let marriage be held in honor 610 00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:33,720 among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will 611 00:39:33,720 --> 00:39:35,760 judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. 612 00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:39,360 One way we hold marriage and honor is by praying for and 613 00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:42,200 pursuing the good of all the marriages in our church. 614 00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:47,560 What's the reality of marriage? It's an exclusive lifelong 615 00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:52,000 covenant woven into the fabric of creation, which means we 616 00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:55,880 should do all we can to strengthen all the marriages 617 00:39:56,240 --> 00:40:00,080 that are in our body. It also means that in one way or 618 00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:02,880 another, every divorce is a tragedy. 619 00:40:03,720 --> 00:40:06,560 Brings us to .3 the tragedy of divorce. 620 00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:10,880 The tragedy of divorce. We learned of this tragedy in 621 00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:13,760 Jesus teaching in verses 9 to 12. 622 00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:22,360 Again to reiterate from verse 9 what therefore God has joined 623 00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:25,000 together. Let not man separate. 624 00:40:25,280 --> 00:40:29,320 This is Jesus main point. You may not divorce for 625 00:40:29,320 --> 00:40:33,520 irreconcilable differences. You may not divorce because you 626 00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:36,360 think the kids would be better off without them having to hear 627 00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:40,000 you fighting all the time. You may not divorce because over 628 00:40:40,000 --> 00:40:41,960 time you've just become two different people and you don't 629 00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:46,360 really know what you ever saw in that person in the 1st place. 630 00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:50,320 Jesus is teaching that divorce is only permitted when the 631 00:40:50,320 --> 00:40:54,160 marriage covenant is broken. But before we explore some of 632 00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:56,440 the wider implications of that, we need to look at the last bit 633 00:40:56,440 --> 00:41:01,440 of the passage, verses 11:50. And in the house the disciples 634 00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:04,480 asked him again about this matter, and he said to them, 635 00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:08,560 Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery 636 00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:11,960 against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, 637 00:41:11,960 --> 00:41:17,040 she commits adultery. Presumably the disciples were 638 00:41:17,040 --> 00:41:20,280 taken aback by Jesus strict stance and so they asked him for 639 00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:23,600 private clarification. What exactly was he clarifying 640 00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:25,800 here? He says essentially the same 641 00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:29,080 thing twice, once from the perspective of the husband and 642 00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:32,160 once for the wife. Now, just as there was an 643 00:41:32,160 --> 00:41:36,320 understood qualification in the Pharisees question in verse 2, 644 00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:38,760 so there's an understood qualification here. 645 00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:42,240 Jesus has denied divorce for any cause. 646 00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:46,480 He hasn't denied that there are any grounds for divorce. 647 00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:49,760 Again, elsewhere in the Gospels, when Jesus gives us the exact 648 00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:54,120 same teaching it specifies, except for sexual immorality. 649 00:41:54,480 --> 00:41:57,000 So. So again, here we're still on 650 00:41:57,000 --> 00:42:01,920 the territory of debating Deuteronomy 24 verse one, and 651 00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:04,560 Jesus is clearly against divorce for any cause. 652 00:42:04,800 --> 00:42:08,640 Deuteronomy 24 verse one only permits divorce for adultery. 653 00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:13,360 So why does an unwarranted divorce lead to adultery? 654 00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:18,640 I think it's common but inaccurate to say because 655 00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:21,240 they're still married in God's eyes. 656 00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:23,680 I don't think that's actually what Jesus is teaching. 657 00:42:24,200 --> 00:42:27,400 Instead, divorce leads to adultery not because the first 658 00:42:27,400 --> 00:42:30,960 marriage still exists, but because the divorce wasn't 659 00:42:30,960 --> 00:42:33,200 permitted by God, and so neither is the remarriage. 660 00:42:33,720 --> 00:42:35,920 The remarriage is considered adultery not because you're 661 00:42:35,920 --> 00:42:38,960 still married in some sense to the first spouse, but because 662 00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:42,920 you you had no permission to divide yourself from that spouse 663 00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:47,880 and unite yourself to another. In brief, I think we can 664 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,240 faithfully summarize Jesus's teaching like this. 665 00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:53,160 Divorce is only permitted when the marriage covenant has been 666 00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:55,880 broken. But to see how Jesus teaching 667 00:42:55,880 --> 00:42:58,880 here fits with the rest of Scriptures teaching takes a 668 00:42:58,880 --> 00:43:01,320 little bit of work. I think we can do that by 669 00:43:01,320 --> 00:43:04,000 looking at just a few passages and seeing how they fit 670 00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,480 together. So first one, we've already 671 00:43:06,480 --> 00:43:12,200 glanced at Matthew 532 paralleled in Matthew 19-9. 672 00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:15,680 But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife except on 673 00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:18,680 the ground of sexual immorality makes her commit adultery. 674 00:43:19,360 --> 00:43:22,360 And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. 675 00:43:22,720 --> 00:43:26,320 Here again, the context is debating Deuteronomy 24. 676 00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:31,360 One, and Jesus both denies and any matter divorce and permits 677 00:43:31,360 --> 00:43:33,120 divorce in the case of sexual immorality. 678 00:43:33,120 --> 00:43:37,000 That's one concrete exception, one specific ground for divorce. 679 00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:42,960 But then in First Corinthians 715, the apostle Paul gives 680 00:43:42,960 --> 00:43:47,040 another exception. Paul writes, but if the 681 00:43:47,040 --> 00:43:49,800 unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. 682 00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:54,000 In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. 683 00:43:54,440 --> 00:44:01,400 God has called you to peace. The situation in view here is a 684 00:44:01,400 --> 00:44:07,480 unilateral divorce in which a non Christian spouse leaves a 685 00:44:07,480 --> 00:44:10,520 Christian spouse. In the ancient Mediterranean 686 00:44:10,520 --> 00:44:14,040 world, a divorce could be accomplished by the simple act 687 00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:16,720 of separation. You didn't have to go to court, 688 00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:18,760 you didn't have to have a judge affirm it. 689 00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:23,520 You just did it by leaving. And so this verse tells a 690 00:44:23,520 --> 00:44:26,400 believer in those circumstances, if your non believing spouse 691 00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:29,400 just walks out and effectively divorces you, there's nothing 692 00:44:29,400 --> 00:44:31,840 further you can do. You have no more obligation. 693 00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:34,200 That's what Paul means by saying they're not enslaved. 694 00:44:34,480 --> 00:44:37,480 They're not bound by the former marriage that their unbelieving 695 00:44:37,480 --> 00:44:40,160 partner has unilaterally dissolved. 696 00:44:41,040 --> 00:44:45,320 So Jesus permits divorce for adultery, divorce and remarriage 697 00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:48,080 for adultery. Paul permits divorce and 698 00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:52,000 implicitly remarriage when an unbelieving spouse unilaterally 699 00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:55,560 ends that marriage. Traditionally, the most common 700 00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:58,360 Protestant understanding of when divorce and remarriage are 701 00:44:58,360 --> 00:45:00,800 permitted basically just takes those two verses and puts them 702 00:45:00,800 --> 00:45:04,640 together, kind of a shorthand. On the most common view, divorce 703 00:45:04,640 --> 00:45:06,960 and remarriage are permitted either in the case of adultery 704 00:45:07,360 --> 00:45:09,560 or in the case of quote UN quote, abandonment by an 705 00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:12,000 unbeliever. And I think that's essentially 706 00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:15,000 accurate. I just hold to a slight tweak of 707 00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:17,080 that view because I think it takes some work to actually put 708 00:45:17,080 --> 00:45:19,680 those two together. It leaves us a logical 709 00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:23,480 difficulty. If Jesus forbids divorce in all 710 00:45:23,480 --> 00:45:27,840 cases except adultery, only one exception, where does Paul get 711 00:45:27,840 --> 00:45:29,720 the authority to just add another exception? 712 00:45:30,240 --> 00:45:33,840 If Jesus is really saying in all conceivable cases every marriage 713 00:45:33,840 --> 00:45:36,880 in the world, there is no divorce permitted except for 714 00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:41,640 adultery, if that's what we take him to mean, how does Paul add 715 00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:45,800 another? I would submit we need a couple 716 00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:47,680 of things to keep in mind to get the answer. 717 00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:52,200 One is that Jesus isn't forbidding all divorces except 718 00:45:52,200 --> 00:45:54,640 for adultery. He's weighing in on a narrower 719 00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:57,120 debate. And I would submit that the 720 00:45:57,120 --> 00:46:00,960 logic that holds both Jesus and Paul's positions together is 721 00:46:00,960 --> 00:46:03,600 that both are expressions of covenant breaking. 722 00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:07,520 To unpack that a bit more fully, there's one more biblical 723 00:46:07,520 --> 00:46:09,320 passage we need to bring in. Only one. 724 00:46:09,560 --> 00:46:12,200 I know it's late in the game. It's been a dense sermon, but 725 00:46:12,200 --> 00:46:17,520 there's no way around it. Exodus 2110 to 11, Like the 726 00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:21,000 Deuteronomy context here to the situation in view is a little 727 00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:24,320 complex. It's regulating a situation 728 00:46:24,320 --> 00:46:27,840 where a man who is already married takes a second wife who 729 00:46:27,840 --> 00:46:32,040 is also a servant, and it lists the rights of that second 730 00:46:32,240 --> 00:46:36,200 servant wife. Here's Exodus 2110 to 11. 731 00:46:37,760 --> 00:46:41,040 If he takes another wife to himself, he shall not diminish 732 00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:44,600 her food, her clothing, or her marital rights. 733 00:46:45,280 --> 00:46:48,080 And if he does not do these three things for her, she shall 734 00:46:48,080 --> 00:46:50,440 go out for nothing without payment of money. 735 00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:55,960 That phrase she shall go out for nothing is explicit permission 736 00:46:56,160 --> 00:46:58,640 to divorce. What are the grounds for the 737 00:46:58,640 --> 00:47:02,120 divorce here? It's neglecting to provide food, 738 00:47:02,880 --> 00:47:07,960 clothing, or conjugal rights. That is sexual, sexual intimacy. 739 00:47:08,680 --> 00:47:11,920 Now you might think, how could this passage from the Old 740 00:47:11,920 --> 00:47:14,480 Testaments, Old Covenant code possibly be relevant to us? 741 00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:16,880 Especially because hardly anybody in the West practices 742 00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:19,440 polygamy. One reason the passage is 743 00:47:19,440 --> 00:47:23,960 relevant is this. Everyone in Jesus day understood 744 00:47:24,080 --> 00:47:27,880 this passage to teach that divorce was permitted in cases 745 00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:31,840 of neglect of provision and refusal of conjugal rights. 746 00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:35,440 The more liberal Hillelites, the more conservative Shamaites 747 00:47:35,600 --> 00:47:38,320 agreed entirely on this point. And there's no evidence 748 00:47:38,320 --> 00:47:40,360 whatsoever that Jesus disagreed with them. 749 00:47:40,360 --> 00:47:43,080 If he did disagree with them, it's one of those things he 750 00:47:43,080 --> 00:47:45,440 would have had to make absolutely explicit as he's 751 00:47:45,440 --> 00:47:48,520 weighing in on their debate. He does make his point of 752 00:47:48,520 --> 00:47:52,440 disagreement explicit. He says nothing about Exodus 21. 753 00:47:53,280 --> 00:47:57,480 Not only that, but Paul echoes the language of these verses in 754 00:47:57,480 --> 00:48:01,240 Exodus in a few key places, kind of endorsing their logic about 755 00:48:01,240 --> 00:48:03,040 what's entailed in the marriage covenant. 756 00:48:03,440 --> 00:48:05,440 One of those is in First Corinthians 7. 757 00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:09,000 In verses 3 to 5 of that chapter, he appeals to each 758 00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:12,240 spouse's obligation to provide conjugal love. 759 00:48:12,880 --> 00:48:16,760 Later in that chapter, First Corinthians 732 to 35, he 760 00:48:16,760 --> 00:48:18,800 appeals to the need for a husband to provide for his 761 00:48:18,800 --> 00:48:22,920 wife's needs, and his language echoes that of Exodus 21. 762 00:48:23,760 --> 00:48:26,960 So on what grounds does Exodus 2110 to 11 permit divorce? 763 00:48:27,680 --> 00:48:33,840 Covenant breaking provision, and conjugal union are integral 764 00:48:33,840 --> 00:48:35,680 aspects of the marriage covenant. 765 00:48:35,680 --> 00:48:38,880 One flesh union demands sustaining the other person's 766 00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:43,000 life, and it requires spouses to give themselves physically to 767 00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:45,520 each other. So I think we should understand 768 00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:50,160 all of these passages. Exodus 21, Matthew 5, Mark 10, 769 00:48:50,160 --> 00:48:57,320 First Corinthians 7 to all either assert or imply a single 770 00:48:57,320 --> 00:49:00,440 rationale for when divorce is permitted, namely when the 771 00:49:00,440 --> 00:49:05,280 covenant has been broken. Now, of course, not every sin of 772 00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:08,600 one spouse against the other breaks the marriage covenant. 773 00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:12,080 There's a difference between scratching a stick and snapping 774 00:49:12,080 --> 00:49:14,720 it in half. There's a difference between 775 00:49:14,720 --> 00:49:20,200 making a mess in a house and lighting the house on fire. 776 00:49:21,240 --> 00:49:24,280 Now to summarize Jesus teaching and connect it with scripture. 777 00:49:25,120 --> 00:49:30,160 The rest of scripture we can say that divorce is permitted, 778 00:49:30,840 --> 00:49:35,240 though never mandated, when one party has broken the covenant. 779 00:49:35,600 --> 00:49:40,400 Examples of that covenant breaking include adultery, 780 00:49:41,240 --> 00:49:45,760 physical abuse, sustained and neglect to provide for physical 781 00:49:45,760 --> 00:49:52,960 needs, and I would also add sustained, unrepentant emotional 782 00:49:53,240 --> 00:49:56,520 abuse. Some of these grounds are 783 00:49:56,520 --> 00:49:59,480 obvious and objective, at least on the surface. 784 00:49:59,880 --> 00:50:02,200 Adultery has either happened or it hasn't, right? 785 00:50:03,160 --> 00:50:06,000 But there are situations that can make us ask, has adultery 786 00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:08,680 actually taken place? Where's the line? 787 00:50:08,840 --> 00:50:11,200 What counts as sexual immorality? 788 00:50:11,960 --> 00:50:15,240 Discerning whether grounds for divorce are present can be 789 00:50:15,240 --> 00:50:18,080 excruciatingly difficult, not to mention delicate and 790 00:50:18,080 --> 00:50:21,320 embarrassing. But Jesus's main point for us is 791 00:50:21,320 --> 00:50:25,480 clear. Divorce is always a tragedy. 792 00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:31,040 When divorce is permitted and legitimate, it's a tragedy 793 00:50:31,040 --> 00:50:34,720 because one party has already torn apart what God joined 794 00:50:34,720 --> 00:50:38,000 together. When divorce is illegitimate, 795 00:50:38,880 --> 00:50:43,520 it's a tragedy because that act wrongly tears apart what God has 796 00:50:43,520 --> 00:50:46,640 joined together. If you're in a difficult 797 00:50:46,640 --> 00:50:50,840 marriage, get help. Get counsel about how to heal 798 00:50:50,840 --> 00:50:53,360 your marriage. Get counsel about whether 799 00:50:53,360 --> 00:50:57,120 divorce should even be on the table long before you begin to 800 00:50:57,600 --> 00:51:03,280 go down that path in your mind. According to Scripture, divorce 801 00:51:03,280 --> 00:51:08,120 is never commanded, but it is sometimes permitted. 802 00:51:08,720 --> 00:51:11,200 We should be gracious and compassionate toward those who 803 00:51:11,200 --> 00:51:15,520 have been divorced, whether with biblical warrant or without. 804 00:51:17,160 --> 00:51:21,920 Divorce is a tragedy, but it is not an unforgivable sin. 805 00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:25,600 Divorce has lasting consequences, but it doesn't put 806 00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:28,080 someone beyond the reach of God's grace. 807 00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:32,880 As a congregation, we used to be prepared to lovingly, patiently 808 00:51:32,880 --> 00:51:36,800 minister to people whose lives have been scarred by divorce in 809 00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:40,320 all kinds of ways and for all kinds of reasons. 810 00:51:41,440 --> 00:51:44,600 Divorce is a tragedy. But if you're a believer in 811 00:51:44,680 --> 00:51:49,200 Jesus, tragedy never gets the last word. 812 00:51:50,120 --> 00:51:53,800 Sin has consequences, sometimes severe consequences, sometimes 813 00:51:53,800 --> 00:51:56,600 consequences that last for the whole rest of our earthly lives. 814 00:51:57,800 --> 00:52:01,200 But God's grace is not only greater than our sin, it's 815 00:52:01,200 --> 00:52:04,640 stronger than our sin. The God who made this world will 816 00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:07,920 one day remake it. If you're in Christ, the God who 817 00:52:07,920 --> 00:52:11,360 made you will one day remake you. 818 00:52:12,040 --> 00:52:13,760 And he begins that work of new creation. 819 00:52:13,760 --> 00:52:17,760 Now by his Holy Spirit, the God who made everything good in the 820 00:52:17,760 --> 00:52:23,200 beginning is also the God who declares, Behold, I'm making all 821 00:52:23,680 --> 00:52:27,000 things new. Let's pray. 822 00:52:33,700 --> 00:52:39,500 Heavenly Father, we thank you for giving ourselves to 823 00:52:39,500 --> 00:52:44,980 ourselves in creation and for the covenant of marriage in 824 00:52:44,980 --> 00:52:48,660 which many of us get to give ourselves wholly to another. 825 00:52:49,560 --> 00:52:52,520 Father, we pray that we would strengthen the marriages that 826 00:52:52,520 --> 00:52:55,960 are in our church. We pray that those marriages 827 00:52:55,960 --> 00:52:58,920 would testify to Your steadfast covenant love. 828 00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:05,200 Father, we pray for any ways we are convicted of sin by Jesus 829 00:53:05,200 --> 00:53:07,440 teaching that we'd cast ourselves upon you for Your 830 00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:11,440 mercy, for your forgiveness, and that Your Holy Spirit will work 831 00:53:11,440 --> 00:53:16,160 cleansing and renewal in us. We pray in Jesus name, Amen.