1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:03,720 Welcome everybody, Super glad to have you guys with us in 2 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:06,200 worship. If you would grab a Bible and 3 00:00:06,200 --> 00:00:08,760 turn with me to first Peter chapter 3. 4 00:00:09,400 --> 00:00:13,080 Let me pray for us and then I'll explain myself. 5 00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:16,560 All right, as you're turning there, let's pray. 6 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:21,360 Father God, we love you and we love you because you first loved 7 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:26,920 us and you sent your Son Jesus Christ to save and to rescue and 8 00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:31,960 to be not only Lord and not only Savior, but also chief treasure, 9 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:37,680 chief author of our joy. And so, Lord, as we come on this 10 00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:43,960 Father's Day, we, we thank you for whoever it was in our nation 11 00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:47,720 that decided our nation needed to stop and to remember and to 12 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:50,560 honor our fathers. And so we want to do just that, 13 00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:54,040 Say thank you for our fathers. And we want to turn our 14 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:55,800 attention. Lord, as we're gathered, we want 15 00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:58,240 to turn our attention to your word and ask you to come and 16 00:00:58,240 --> 00:01:02,800 teach us and ask you to equip us, Lord, to be faithful in this 17 00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:06,120 world for your glory and for our joy. 18 00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:09,600 And so would you teach us in these next few moments, We ask 19 00:01:09,600 --> 00:01:11,480 it in the name of Jesus and for his sake. 20 00:01:12,160 --> 00:01:14,920 Amen. So you are in First Peter 21 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:17,200 chapter 3. Let me explain what we're doing. 22 00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:20,840 Several years ago, it was a Mother's Day. 23 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:23,120 I wanted to give our mothers a great gift. 24 00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:25,000 And so I was trying to think of what to do. 25 00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:29,680 And what I, what I settled on was that I would preach to the 26 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:33,120 men of our church about biblical masculinity, thinking that that 27 00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:36,280 would be a great gift for our mothers, for our men to be more 28 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:40,960 like Christ. And in exchange on Father's Day, 29 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:44,760 I teach on biblical femininity, some message on biblical 30 00:01:45,080 --> 00:01:47,760 femininity. And so if you're a visitor with 31 00:01:47,760 --> 00:01:51,360 us, you might think that kind of strange, but think about this 32 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:54,400 for a moment of why this is such an important thing on the 33 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:58,200 regular to be talking about. If you, if you remember the book 34 00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:01,280 of Romans chapter 1, Paul talks about the wrath of God being 35 00:02:01,280 --> 00:02:05,200 revealed from heaven against all unrighteousness of men who by 36 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:07,280 their unrighteousness suppress the truth. 37 00:02:08,039 --> 00:02:10,600 They they push the truth down by their own sin. 38 00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:14,800 And Paul explains what happens in a culture where what they do 39 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:19,160 is they exchange the glory of God for the image of something 40 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,760 created and they worship some creature. 41 00:02:22,520 --> 00:02:25,720 And when, when they do that, when we exchange the glory and 42 00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:30,280 the greatness of God for the image of a creation, God gives 43 00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:33,400 us over to that decision. And then we make another 44 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:36,320 exchange. We exchange the truth of God for 45 00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:41,080 a lie and God in Romans one gives us over to that. 46 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:46,120 And then as the last step, we exchange the natural relations 47 00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:52,520 of men and women for unnatural relations between men and men 48 00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:56,000 and women and women. And God gives a nation over a 49 00:02:56,000 --> 00:03:01,360 culture over to that debauchery. So, so it's, it's exchanging the 50 00:03:01,360 --> 00:03:04,440 glory of God, the truth of God and the natural functions and 51 00:03:04,440 --> 00:03:08,680 God, that the mark of God's wrath, the mark of his judgment 52 00:03:08,680 --> 00:03:13,120 on a people is not fire falling from heaven, although that's 53 00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:17,680 still in the cards. The mark of his wrath is that he 54 00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:20,880 gives us over to those things. And so if you dwell in a land 55 00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:23,240 where we don't know the difference between a man and a 56 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:26,960 woman, we dwell in a land that's under the wrath of God, We've 57 00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:32,080 been given over to these things. And So what we want to do is, is 58 00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:35,160 lead our nation in repentance. But if you think about this 59 00:03:35,200 --> 00:03:38,480 carefully for a moment before we dig into this text, you'll 60 00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:42,800 realize that unfortunately, many churches in our land have sought 61 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:47,280 to buddy up to the world, to teach relevant truth to the 62 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:49,560 world. And so they'll say things like, 63 00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:53,480 you know, we, we don't really want to dwell on things like 64 00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:58,280 biblical masculinity or biblical femininity, which are God's not 65 00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:02,040 only his desire and his design, they're also his requirement. 66 00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:05,880 We don't want to talk about those things because the world 67 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:09,160 won't won't love us. They won't draw near to us, 68 00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:13,600 which means that many churches in our land, in a land that has 69 00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:19,160 been given over to these monstrous ideas, many in the 70 00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:22,079 church never hear sermons on gender, on marriage, on 71 00:04:22,079 --> 00:04:25,920 sexuality, because that's too much flying in the face of the 72 00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:28,280 world. And so if you've never been here 73 00:04:28,280 --> 00:04:30,480 before, let me introduce myself in our church. 74 00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:33,600 My name is Pastor Will Martin. I'm the pastor of Trinity 75 00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:38,400 Reformed Church and we want to desperately buddy up, not to the 76 00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:42,920 world, but to the Lord. Not the rebellious world, not 77 00:04:42,920 --> 00:04:49,120 the devil who has deceived it. We court and we try and maintain 78 00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:52,200 a fear of the Lord and take our marching orders and our 79 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:56,920 standards of beauty from God, not from this world that has 80 00:04:56,920 --> 00:05:00,200 lost its mind. We couldn't care less if the 81 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:03,360 world loves or hates this about us. 82 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:06,760 We just don't care. We care for their sake. 83 00:05:06,760 --> 00:05:08,720 We want all men to come to repentance. 84 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:10,840 We want them to know truth and goodness and beauty. 85 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:16,320 But we will not even remotely consider softening biblical 86 00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:21,600 language to to suit a culture that uses things like the 87 00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:25,400 accusation of offense to get people away from the truth. 88 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,200 You think about that. Like you in our culture, if you 89 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:31,560 say something true and somebody goes that hurts my feelings, a 90 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,960 lot of times you'll hear good Christians, well meaning 91 00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:36,160 Christians say, oh, I'm, I'm so sorry. 92 00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:39,840 Well, we're not sorry. Maybe if you're offended by the 93 00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:44,040 truth, maybe in God's grace, you ought to be offended because you 94 00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:47,200 need to change. OK, so we are eager to have the 95 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:50,200 word of God examine us, not the other way around, where we 96 00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:54,720 examine and become judges of God and of his word. 97 00:05:54,720 --> 00:05:59,640 How ludicrous could you? Could you be the word of God is 98 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:03,200 our standard because Christ is our Lord and and and one other 99 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:04,840 thing that's really important before we dig in. 100 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:11,520 We will never sort of quietly acknowledge God on paper right. 101 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:15,840 We believe God is the essence of truth and goodness and beauty. 102 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:20,360 His word and his ways and life under his blessing is sweeter 103 00:06:20,360 --> 00:06:22,680 than honey. In his presence there is 104 00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:26,960 fullness of joy at his right hand are pleasures forevermore. 105 00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:30,880 Listen to me, brothers and sisters, our God is the author 106 00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:34,360 of human laughter. He is the author of human 107 00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:37,440 satisfaction. He is the author, the creator of 108 00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:43,080 human happiness, of sex, of appetite, of food, of drink, of 109 00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:47,440 thirst, of all of it. Anything good comes from this 110 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:50,560 God. And so when he says, hey, you 111 00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:55,160 should do it this way, we don't want to tell that God whose idea 112 00:06:55,640 --> 00:06:58,560 it's those things are his idea. We don't want to tell him now 113 00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:00,640 we're going to try it our own way. 114 00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:04,560 No, all of it is his stuff. So why in the name of heaven 115 00:07:04,560 --> 00:07:07,800 would we shy away from delighting ourselves in all that 116 00:07:07,800 --> 00:07:10,680 God is and in all that God has commanded? 117 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:16,040 So Please remember, never forget that it was the devil that first 118 00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:19,800 insinuated that the Word of God was spoken to rob you of your 119 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:22,400 joy. God knows that in the day you 120 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:26,880 eat of it, you'll be like God. He's trying to keep you down and 121 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:29,320 keep you back. We know better. 122 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:33,920 That's demonic doctrine. We know that God's Word is 123 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:37,320 always spoken so that our joy may be established. 124 00:07:37,920 --> 00:07:41,640 So no, we do not apologize for believing the Bible as written 125 00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:44,960 in all of its parts. Once it's properly understood, 126 00:07:45,640 --> 00:07:48,600 we will not merely sign a doctrinal statement and then 127 00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:52,360 hide those doctrines in the bowels of our existence. 128 00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:54,880 No, we're going to put them on display and say this is who we 129 00:07:54,880 --> 00:07:56,960 are. This is what we love. 130 00:07:57,400 --> 00:07:59,320 We're not going to conceal biblical standards. 131 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:01,480 We will boast in the Lord and in the Word. 132 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:04,640 He is spoken in the midst of a culture who has lost their 133 00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:08,800 minds, and we will seek His power to render glad obedience 134 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:11,480 to the things that God has decreed. 135 00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:16,480 And so in that light, what I want to do is I want to read 136 00:08:16,680 --> 00:08:21,440 briefly a text from first Peter 3 and I want to give my sisters 137 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:25,360 and the Lord an exhortation towards faithfulness and 138 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:28,760 biblical femininity. So if you're in first Peter 139 00:08:28,760 --> 00:08:31,800 chapter 3, that's just an explanation of why we're why 140 00:08:31,800 --> 00:08:33,799 we're here in this text on this day. 141 00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:39,039 So look with me in First Peter chapter 3 and we'll lean into 142 00:08:39,039 --> 00:08:44,080 these things Peter says likewise, wives, be subject to 143 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:48,360 your own husband's, so that even if some do not obey the word, 144 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:54,200 they may be 1 without a word by the conduct of their wives when 145 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:56,800 they see your respectful and pure conduct. 146 00:08:57,600 --> 00:09:00,280 Do not let your adorning be external. 147 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:03,360 I think the idea merely is merely external. 148 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:07,120 It's not as though God, the author of beauty, does not like 149 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:11,160 beauty. He does like beauty, but that 150 00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:16,640 the the thrust of a woman would not be external beauty, the 151 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:19,800 braiding of hair, the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing 152 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:22,120 that you wear. But let your adorning be the 153 00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:26,400 hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable beauty of a 154 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:30,560 gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is not just 155 00:09:30,560 --> 00:09:33,880 precious, but what very precious. 156 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:38,680 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn 157 00:09:38,680 --> 00:09:43,240 themselves by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah 158 00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:45,880 obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord. 159 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:50,520 And you are her children if you do good and do not fear anything 160 00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:53,360 that is frightening. So let me exhort you to a couple 161 00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:56,160 of things from this text. First of all, and I'll explain 162 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:59,560 the text as I go along. First of all, if you have a 163 00:09:59,560 --> 00:10:04,440 husband, you have a scriptural obligation to submit yourself to 164 00:10:04,440 --> 00:10:07,280 him, to honor him and to enjoy him. 165 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:12,600 Three things to submit yourself to him, to honor him and to 166 00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:18,120 enjoy him if you have a husband. So First off, submission, it 167 00:10:18,120 --> 00:10:21,160 would be easy, as a lot of people like to say is there's 168 00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:23,640 like maybe one or two texts that that kind of talk about that. 169 00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:25,760 But if you look at them in their context, they don't really mean 170 00:10:25,760 --> 00:10:28,200 that. If you just read a cursory 171 00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:30,240 reading of the New Testament, you're going to come across 172 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:35,040 First Corinthians 1434, Ephesians 522, Colossians 318, 173 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:40,240 Titus 2/5, First Peter 3, verse one, all of which command a wife 174 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:44,240 to be in, to submit herself to her covenant head, her husband. 175 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:47,440 This is not a small doctrine in our faith. 176 00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:50,400 This is just plain text of Holy Scripture. 177 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:55,200 And so it would be, it would be unfaithful of me to just pretend 178 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:58,080 like, well, it's not really that big of a deal when God repeats 179 00:10:58,080 --> 00:11:00,000 himself three times. It's a huge deal. 180 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:03,080 What about 5:00? Well, it's an even bigger deal. 181 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:07,560 So submission means simply to put yourself voluntarily 182 00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:10,760 underneath the authority of someone else. 183 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:13,680 So brothers, my brothers, as we're talking, as I'm talking to 184 00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:16,000 the sisters, let me just parentheses here. 185 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:20,800 This cannot be forced. This is a word to wives. 186 00:11:21,160 --> 00:11:23,360 Submit yourselves to your husbands. 187 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:26,960 You will search the scriptures in vain to find the text that 188 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:30,760 says husbands, ensure that your wife is submitting to you. 189 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:35,520 It's not there because if it's a forced thing, it is not 190 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,440 submission. It's just tyranny. 191 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:42,120 I can get Gracie to do loads of things by twisting her arm. 192 00:11:42,240 --> 00:11:45,760 That's not submission, nor is it beautiful, nor is it what God 193 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:48,360 required, nor is it safe for me because. 194 00:11:48,560 --> 00:11:49,800 Because God would strike me down. 195 00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:56,080 I believe so husbands, you sort of pray this over your wife. 196 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:58,800 You, you talk about these things, but this is not your 197 00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:01,400 mandate. This is holy scriptures mandate 198 00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:05,280 on your wife, ladies, to submit yourself to your husband 199 00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:09,240 voluntarily to your own husband. By the way, there's no text in 200 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:12,960 Scripture that says women submit yourself to men. 201 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:15,920 Women generally submit yourself to all men. 202 00:12:15,920 --> 00:12:18,800 Generally it's not there. It's husbands or wives. 203 00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:21,200 Submit yourself to your own husbands. 204 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:24,600 OK, so submission second is to honor. 205 00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:30,600 If you look in first Peter 3 verse 5 and 6, this is how holy 206 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:34,360 women who hoped and God used to adorn themselves by submitting 207 00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:39,600 to their own husband as Sarah obeyed Abraham calling him Lord. 208 00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:43,200 And you are her children. If you do good and do not fear 209 00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:45,800 anything that is frightening. It's an amazing thing. 210 00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:49,640 You ever pondered that when in Holy Scripture did Sarah call 211 00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:52,080 Abraham Lord? Well, I'm glad you asked. 212 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:55,880 As I'm about to tell you, there's a text where Abraham 213 00:12:56,480 --> 00:13:01,960 looks up and sees three men coming his way and we're told 214 00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:06,040 that one of those men is Yahweh. It's it's pre Incarnate Jesus. 215 00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:09,440 The other two are angels that make their way to Sodom to pass 216 00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:14,160 judgement on Sodom. But when these three men sit 217 00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:18,160 down with Abraham, Abraham feasts them and and the text 218 00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:22,840 says, and I quote then Yahweh said to Abraham, So this is very 219 00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:26,160 God, a very God talking in human form to Abraham. 220 00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:29,280 And he says these words. I will surely return to you 221 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:33,000 about this time next year. And Sarah, your wife shall have 222 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:36,160 a son. And Sarah, put this in your 223 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:39,920 mind. Sarah was listening at the tent 224 00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:41,920 door behind. She's dropping them, ES she's 225 00:13:42,160 --> 00:13:43,720 just listening. I hear my name. 226 00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:48,440 What is this? And the text says she was 227 00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:51,320 listening behind the tent door. Now Abraham and Sarah were old, 228 00:13:51,680 --> 00:13:54,360 advanced in years, and the way of women had ceased to be with 229 00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:58,600 Sarah. And so Sarah laughed and she 230 00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:01,320 said, listen to these words carefully, she said, not out 231 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:06,200 loud, she said to herself, so this is holy scripture laying 232 00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:10,400 bare the internal dialogue of our matriarch, the matriarch of 233 00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,080 faith. And this is what she says. 234 00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:19,560 After I am worn out and my Lord is old, shall I have pleasure? 235 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:26,560 I just marvel at that, that Sarah so honored her husband 236 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:31,280 that even in her internal dialogue she is holding him as 237 00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:33,160 Lord. She called him Abraham. 238 00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:36,800 She called him my Lord in her heart when no one was around to 239 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:39,600 hear it. And so, sisters, let me ask you, 240 00:14:40,120 --> 00:14:43,480 if the Lord laid there in Holy Scripture your internal thoughts 241 00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:46,000 towards your husband, what would we read? 242 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:53,680 What would we read? My idiot husband is too old to 243 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:55,040 have a baby with me. What? 244 00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:57,560 What kind of stuff would be there in your heart? 245 00:14:58,040 --> 00:15:01,680 This is a standard that is beyond high, but you were to 246 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:04,960 court a heart that truly honors your husband in Word and in 247 00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:07,440 deed. And that heart always becomes 248 00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:10,480 visible in the way that you treat him in public. 249 00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:13,680 So you the, the, the requirement is submission, the requirement 250 00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:16,800 is honor. And then also the requirement is 251 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:20,440 to enjoy your husband. And some men make this very 252 00:15:20,440 --> 00:15:22,680 difficult and shame upon us when we do. 253 00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:25,240 But I want you to, I want you to listen to this. 254 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:32,280 This is Titus, Titus chapter 2. This is what Paul commands. 255 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:37,960 He says, I want older women likewise to be reverent in 256 00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:40,000 behavior, not slanderers or slaves. 257 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:43,040 Too much wine. They are to teach what is good 258 00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:49,160 and so train the young women. OK, so older women are to not do 259 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:51,120 these things. They're to teach and train. 260 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,320 And we would ask, what are you to teach and what are you to 261 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:54,960 train? What are they to do? 262 00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:58,720 What, what service are they to render to the young women as 263 00:15:58,720 --> 00:16:00,440 they teach them and as they train them? 264 00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:04,640 Paul says that they are to teach and to train the young women to 265 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:08,480 first and foremost love their husbands. 266 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:13,920 Philandross it's it's Phileo is is not agape. 267 00:16:13,920 --> 00:16:16,760 Agape is the self sacrificing love of Christ. 268 00:16:16,760 --> 00:16:18,960 Me for them. I'll die in your place. 269 00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:22,160 Phileo is like a brotherly friendliness. 270 00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:24,920 It's two guys smoking a cigar and drinking a whiskey and 271 00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:27,880 enjoying conversation. It's enjoyment, it's laughter, 272 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:30,960 it's lighthearted. Man, I just love this person. 273 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:35,920 And Paul puts them together and says, teach them to filet O 274 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:39,560 their husbands, to enjoy their husbands, to delight in them, to 275 00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:42,480 like their company. And then the second is to do the 276 00:16:42,480 --> 00:16:46,880 same thing, filet O Technon, to love their children, to be one 277 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:51,400 who delights in their children. And so toleration of your 278 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:54,760 husband, toleration of your children is not the standard. 279 00:16:55,680 --> 00:17:00,080 God wants there to be a deep seated enjoyment of him and 280 00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:02,760 them. Like that's the standard. 281 00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:06,680 And so by by the way, I would just say you, you older women, 282 00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:09,280 you would say, if you would say like, I don't know if I have 283 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:10,640 anything to teach the younger women. 284 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:12,520 I'll bet you I could tell you one thing. 285 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:15,880 As you watch some of the mothers in this church run around and 286 00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:20,560 chase wild animals right in here and change diapers and get poo 287 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:24,200 on their hands and all of these things and want to, you know, 288 00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:28,040 pull their hair out that you might be able to tell them, Hey, 289 00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:31,440 treasure these years because they're not going to be here for 290 00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:33,080 long. Drink these in. 291 00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:35,960 Drink these in. Learn to enjoy these moments 292 00:17:36,360 --> 00:17:38,920 because you're going to look back on them with a deep longing 293 00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:40,360 that God would give them back to you. 294 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:46,000 So a couple of things here. All of this and especially in in 295 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:48,600 in Titus, but in first Peter as well. 296 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:51,880 All of this has as its goal that the word of God may not be 297 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:55,400 reviled that the way that we conduct ourselves as God's 298 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:59,400 people who have been marked by his name, that our conduct would 299 00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:03,240 bring glory and honor to our God and not the other way around. 300 00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:06,040 Not that people would look at us and say man you you you are a 301 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:08,960 Christian like that. That's a it's a terrible 302 00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:11,200 testimony. These things are so that the 303 00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:14,760 word of God may not be reviled and and I quote that in 304 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:20,400 everything they may adorn the doctrine of God our savior. 305 00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:26,040 So, so picture ladies, when you and, and, and, and Titus, it's 306 00:18:26,120 --> 00:18:29,040 all of those commands to, to older men, to younger men, to 307 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:32,720 older women, younger women, to, to masters, to slaves, all of 308 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:35,200 that. Conduct yourself this way so 309 00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:38,520 that in these things we may adorn the doctrine of God our 310 00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:41,040 Savior. We can beautify and display. 311 00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:45,560 We can't make it more beautiful, but we can display the doctrines 312 00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:48,320 of God our Savior as we do these things. 313 00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:52,520 Now, second thing that you need to know about these standards is 314 00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:56,120 that they are all impossible if what you're trying to do is 315 00:18:56,120 --> 00:18:58,640 muster. So ladies, if you go home and 316 00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:02,240 say, OK, so I haven't been submitting, I haven't been 317 00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:04,680 honoring and I haven't been enjoying my husband. 318 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:07,120 So I'm going to go home and I'm going to make a check box list 319 00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:08,440 of like, these are the things I'm going to do. 320 00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:10,120 You're off on the wrong foot already. 321 00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:14,880 One of the most helpful texts is in Ephesians where right before 322 00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:18,040 Paul tells wives to submit to their own husbands and husbands 323 00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:20,640 to love their wives as Christ loved the church, right before 324 00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:26,080 that he says be being filled with the Holy Spirit, that these 325 00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:30,400 are things only that that we can only do when the Holy Spirit has 326 00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:33,840 filled us and is guiding and directing and empowering us. 327 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,640 And so if you need help here, you need to be praying and learn 328 00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:42,520 dependence upon the Holy Spirit. OK, so if you have a husband 329 00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:45,040 first, first point, if you have a husband, those are your 330 00:19:45,080 --> 00:19:49,840 biblical requirements. You, you owe the Lord submission 331 00:19:50,280 --> 00:19:53,280 and honor and and enjoyment of your husband. 332 00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:57,840 Second thing, if you do not yet have a husband but want one, if 333 00:19:57,840 --> 00:19:59,840 you're a young gal in this church thinking like man, I 334 00:19:59,840 --> 00:20:01,600 would love one day to be married. 335 00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:05,160 Well, this is your exhortation. You have an obligation to be 336 00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:09,440 wise and considering what type of man you would gladly bestow 337 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:11,840 the honor of your submission upon. 338 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:16,200 You have to be as as man comes to your dad and says, I'd like 339 00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,560 to pursue. And you start to pray and you 340 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:21,440 start to think about this guy. You need to be asking this 341 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:24,920 question. Is, is this guy a worthy man for 342 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:28,240 me to bestow the honor of my submission to him? 343 00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:32,080 So I told those of you who were there yesterday at Kendall's 344 00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:35,600 wedding and at every wedding that a wedding is a coronation. 345 00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:38,760 Husband is the head of the wife. Wife, an excellent wife is the 346 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:44,400 crown of her husband. And so it is, ladies, an 347 00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:48,280 excellent wife is a crown. You are, you are the glory of 348 00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:51,000 your husband, the glory of the glory of God. 349 00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:54,040 And so single sisters, when you enter into a covenant of 350 00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:57,520 marriage, you're choosing to bestow a breathtaking honor on 351 00:20:57,520 --> 00:20:59,320 one man. And so before you do that, 352 00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:02,680 afterward you're it's all said and done, that's who you are to 353 00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:05,080 honor. But before you do that, you need 354 00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:09,120 to ask yourself a few questions. Is this man that's pursuing me 355 00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:14,480 with submission to him and with honoring him and enjoying this 356 00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:18,240 man, would it be abnormally difficult? 357 00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:22,280 Is this guy that much of A bore and a tool shed that it's going 358 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:26,200 to be impossible for me to enjoy him or submit to him? 359 00:21:27,040 --> 00:21:30,480 You might ask, is this man unwise? 360 00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:33,680 Meaning, is he wise in his own eyes to the extent that he won't 361 00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:37,200 listen to counsel from outside? Is he, has he reached the 362 00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:40,680 pinnacle of divine thoughts, so that no man in his life can 363 00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:42,200 speak in? Or is he humble? 364 00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:45,240 Is he, is he teachable? Is he pursuing the men in his 365 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,920 life for wisdom and for training? 366 00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:51,600 Is he disobedient to his own authorities? 367 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:54,920 Right. There's nothing as ugly as a man 368 00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:58,640 who will not obey the command to love his wife as Christ loved 369 00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,200 the church. But oh buddy, he's got the open 370 00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:04,880 Scripture saying submit to your husband in everything as to the 371 00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:07,800 Lord, that's ugly and it's sinful. 372 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:10,680 No, we're all to submit. We're all to obey. 373 00:22:11,160 --> 00:22:16,080 I talked to a young man. This is a couple years ago, who 374 00:22:16,080 --> 00:22:19,880 was wanting to pursue somebody and I asked him just trying to 375 00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:22,880 get to know him, Hey, who are the great men in your life? 376 00:22:22,880 --> 00:22:24,400 The great influences that you would say? 377 00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:26,040 Man, this guy is, is really sharp. 378 00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:29,000 And I was like, you know what? And so he, he started with his 379 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:32,960 dad and he goes, man, I really love my dad, but I just don't 380 00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:34,200 want to pattern my life after him. 381 00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:37,600 He's got this and that problem. And so he, he dismisses his dad 382 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,760 as a, as a resource. And then he says, and I've got a 383 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,440 great pastor. He's a great preacher, He's a 384 00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:45,040 really good guy, but I just don't, there's something off 385 00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:47,160 about my pastor. And so I don't really look up to 386 00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:49,440 him so much. And, and I told him that and he 387 00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:51,600 said, well, maybe you should pursue this elder who's a really 388 00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:53,280 godly man. And I kind of got to know him 389 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:55,200 and I didn't really like this about him. 390 00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:58,760 And so dad is out, pastor is out, elder is out. 391 00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:00,560 But I'll tell you who I really want to be like. 392 00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:03,280 I've got this guy. He's one year younger than me in 393 00:23:03,280 --> 00:23:05,880 college. He's my roommate, he's my peer 394 00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:09,480 because he's just like me and doesn't challenge me at all and 395 00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:13,600 doesn't say stop being an idiot like the older men in my life 396 00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:16,080 will do. So that's going to be difficult. 397 00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:19,200 Ladies, as you, as you're looking at a guy, is he unwise? 398 00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:21,720 Is he disobedient to his own authorities? 399 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:24,600 But he's going to come in and require submission, your 400 00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:28,240 submission to him. Is he dis curious? 401 00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:31,440 Has he has he already arrived at all wisdom? 402 00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:36,400 Is he discourteous in the pursuit of a bride? 403 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:41,040 Is he looking for a crown? And is he treating you that way, 404 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,920 opening doors, saying kind things to you? 405 00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:47,000 Is he treating you in a way that's honoring to you? 406 00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:51,040 Or is it clear that he just wants a new mom to wash his 407 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:52,920 dirty underwear? Like what? 408 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:56,320 What is he after? And and just try and try and see 409 00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:58,920 that on him. So this is the question of 410 00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:01,720 courtship. Would submission to this man be 411 00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:04,920 wearisome or would it be wonderful? 412 00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:10,520 So this year, think about this. Forrest was given Haley, Sean 413 00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:14,880 was given Hannah, Eli was given Grace, Aaron was given Kendall. 414 00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:21,600 And what those four young men received was royal dignity and 415 00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:25,880 future generations. So make sure, Single Ladies, 416 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:28,960 that you're not given to a man that make sure that you are 417 00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:31,360 being given to a man who's worthy of that glory. 418 00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:34,160 He does not have to be perfect, right? 419 00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:38,520 Marriage presumes the guy is imperfect and he needs a helper. 420 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,080 So he doesn't have to be perfect, but he better be 421 00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:43,440 perfectible. He better be perfectible. 422 00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:45,680 OK. Thirdly, my sisters in the Lord, 423 00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:49,880 be more concerned from first Peter 3, be more concerned with 424 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:53,040 developing the beauty of feminine virtues of your soul 425 00:24:53,360 --> 00:24:56,280 than in nearly looking beautiful. 426 00:24:57,240 --> 00:24:59,160 So I read this to you in verse 3. 427 00:24:59,360 --> 00:25:02,280 Do not let your adorning be external, the braiding of hair, 428 00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:05,320 the putting on of gold or jewelry, the clothing you wear, 429 00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:08,160 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with 430 00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:11,800 imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's 431 00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:16,920 sight is very precious. So you'll notice that the hidden 432 00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:20,200 person of the heart with imperishable beauty of a gentle 433 00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:23,680 and quiet spirit is what God finds precious. 434 00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:28,840 God does not find precious the right number on a scale. 435 00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:33,600 He does not find as precious the right bra size, the right 436 00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:37,200 hairstyle, the right tint of your makeup color. 437 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:39,920 That's not what he's concerned with. 438 00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:44,320 He looks at your heart. And when he finds in a woman's 439 00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:48,640 heart a woman who is gentle, she's humble, she's quiet, she 440 00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:53,520 has a quiet reserved spirit. God looks at that and says that 441 00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:59,000 is precious in my sight. By the way, gentle in that text 442 00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:03,320 is, is the same word when Jesus said blessed are the meek, for 443 00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:07,000 they will inherit the earth. Meekness is strength reigned in. 444 00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:10,800 It's the racehorse giving Kitty rides to little kids. 445 00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,560 That's meekness. And that's what women are to be. 446 00:26:13,760 --> 00:26:16,160 It's not weakness. You just need to be a weak, 447 00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:19,440 tender little thing. You need to be stronger than 448 00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:21,160 steel, but you need to have that. 449 00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:24,920 You need to have that power of influence and, and, and all of 450 00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:28,160 the gifts that God has given you reined in. 451 00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:29,760 There needs to be a meekness there. 452 00:26:30,120 --> 00:26:33,360 Quietness means well ordered or not frantic. 453 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:36,440 So there's no panic. There's no loud attention 454 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,160 seeking, no high drama so that I can be the center. 455 00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:45,600 I'm just content to be a part of things and to be quiet, a quiet 456 00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:50,040 part of the crown. So some of you old timers might 457 00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:55,200 remember a clip of Shirley MacLaine running down the beach 458 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:58,680 screaming I am gone. Maybe none of you guys remember 459 00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:02,000 that, but I remember people showing me that and talking 460 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:03,600 about it. She's running down. 461 00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:06,640 This famous, wealthy, beautiful woman is running down the beach 462 00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:10,600 and she's saying I am God. And he even sits in the heavens, 463 00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:15,720 laughs and turns away in disgust at a woman who is loud and who 464 00:27:15,720 --> 00:27:19,640 is aggressive, saying I am gone. But when a woman is gentle and 465 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,160 quiet in soul, our God leans into whisper. 466 00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:27,840 This is what I call precious fourth sisters. 467 00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:32,640 Bring your questions to your husband's. 468 00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:35,680 I'm going to jump to a different text, but it's important that we 469 00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:39,040 read this First Corinthians 14. You can turn here with me if you 470 00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:40,280 want to see it. You don't have to. 471 00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:44,120 You can just listen. But first Corinthians 14, this 472 00:27:44,120 --> 00:27:47,320 is what Paul exhorts the women in in Corinth. 473 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:50,760 And by the way, this may be a space maker text, but that's OK. 474 00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:53,960 If you got a problem, you've got a problem with Paul, not with 475 00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:55,440 Pastor will. But you can have a problem with 476 00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:56,120 me too. That's fine. 477 00:27:56,760 --> 00:28:01,200 But here's what he says. As in all the churches of the 478 00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:03,840 Saints. So this is not unique to 479 00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:06,240 Corinth. This is in all the churches. 480 00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:11,480 He says the women should keep silent in the churches, for they 481 00:28:11,480 --> 00:28:14,960 are not permitted to speak, but should be in submission as the 482 00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:18,640 law also says. If there is anything they desire 483 00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:23,160 to learn, let them ask their husbands at home, for it is 484 00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:26,640 shameful for a woman to speak in church. 485 00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:29,320 So let me explain a couple of things here. 486 00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:33,280 First off, the context. If you look back at verse 26, 487 00:28:33,600 --> 00:28:38,120 the context is orderly worship. This is not that when women come 488 00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:40,040 into the church, they're to be seen and not heard. 489 00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:42,120 They can never open their mouth, not that at all. 490 00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:45,080 This is in the context of orderly worship, that all 491 00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:47,360 things, when the church is gathered, they're to be done in 492 00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:49,680 order. And I believe what was going on 493 00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:51,760 in Corinth, I won't fight you for this, but I believe this to 494 00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:56,040 be the case, is that when Christ came into the world, he bestowed 495 00:28:56,880 --> 00:29:01,000 joint airship on women. And so they enjoyed for the 496 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:05,720 first time in history, the the dignity of being treated as an 497 00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:09,000 equal, as a real person, not as chattel, not as a thing to be 498 00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:13,440 traded or bartered for, but as real eternal souls that under 499 00:29:13,440 --> 00:29:16,320 the inspiration of Christ, that Christ honored all of the women 500 00:29:16,640 --> 00:29:18,760 in his life. And so as these women were 501 00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:21,800 coming into the church and experiencing equality, you can 502 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:23,400 just sort of imagine this, right? 503 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:27,200 They're coming to church and they hear somebody preaching and 504 00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:29,680 they say, wait, wait, wait, wait, go back. 505 00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:31,280 I, I, I didn't catch the reference. 506 00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:33,600 Would you please explain that? I don't understand that. 507 00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,400 I think you're wrong. And they're, they're 508 00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:37,280 interrupting the ordered worship. 509 00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:41,200 And So what Paul says is if they, if they have a question, 510 00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:44,160 if there's anything they desire to learn, let them ask their 511 00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:48,720 husbands at home. And so let me try and apply this 512 00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:52,280 to our context. Any woman in our congregation 513 00:29:52,280 --> 00:29:56,000 can get pastoral counseling. And so brothers, it's not, it's 514 00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:58,920 not inappropriate if your wife says, I would like to talk to 515 00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:01,680 the elders, I would like to get pastoral counseling here. 516 00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:04,880 That's not an offense against the headship, your headship in 517 00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:07,680 your home. But having said that, it should 518 00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:12,280 be normal practice for our wives and daughters to be asking their 519 00:30:12,280 --> 00:30:16,680 covenant heads, their husbands or their fathers, not their 520 00:30:16,680 --> 00:30:19,920 elders first. OK, so let me let me run a 521 00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:24,200 couple of scenarios with you. Scenario 1A wife has a question 522 00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:28,640 she asks pastor and pastor answers. 523 00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:31,680 Now in this first scenario, wife has her answer. 524 00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:35,120 Pastor feels useful and honored to be asked. 525 00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:37,680 This is one of the this is like crack cocaine to me. 526 00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:40,800 When somebody says I need help understanding this text or I 527 00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:42,920 need to think through this, it's my favorite thing. 528 00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:46,640 I love to do that because it makes me feel one honored, but 529 00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:50,360 also useful because I'm not the guy you ask about plumbing, 530 00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:52,040 right? I'm not the guy you asked about 531 00:30:52,040 --> 00:30:53,480 electric. Or can I pull this? 532 00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:54,760 Can you help me build this house? 533 00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:56,400 Can you pull this carburetor and fix it? 534 00:30:56,520 --> 00:31:01,040 No, I'm sorry, I can't do that. So I'm utterly useless in those 535 00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:03,640 contexts. But in this one context, I can 536 00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:04,920 be useful. And so I love that. 537 00:31:04,920 --> 00:31:07,600 So in scenario 1, nothing sinful, nothing wrong. 538 00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:10,240 Wife has a question. She asked faster, she gets 539 00:31:10,600 --> 00:31:13,400 question answered, he feels useful and honored. 540 00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:18,600 But what if we did it this way? Scenario two, wife has a 541 00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:23,120 question and she goes to her husband who she knows probably 542 00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:28,880 does not know this answer. So husband, now his wife is 543 00:31:28,880 --> 00:31:30,560 leaning on him. Hey, I need you to speak into 544 00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:31,840 this. I need counsel here. 545 00:31:31,840 --> 00:31:35,240 And so he starts to read the word more carefully, praying, 546 00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:39,040 asking God for clarity. He calls pastor or elders and in 547 00:31:39,040 --> 00:31:41,600 long form conversation speak into this. 548 00:31:41,600 --> 00:31:45,160 What does this mean? Until he has a handle on all of 549 00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:49,480 the issues at hand that answers his wife's question, and then 550 00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:52,960 the husband gets to do something that pastors and elders can't 551 00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:55,240 really do. And that's to distill all of 552 00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:59,160 that as it concerns our unique family and our unique situation. 553 00:31:59,160 --> 00:32:02,400 So I'm taking all of the theological answers, all the big 554 00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,000 picture stuff. I'm distilling it for my 555 00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:08,120 household, and now I'm coming and bringing an answer for my 556 00:32:08,120 --> 00:32:09,920 wife. Now, in the result of this 557 00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:13,920 scenario is the wife has her answer, just like in the first 558 00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:17,720 scenario in the but but added to that, you have a husband who 559 00:32:17,720 --> 00:32:21,320 feels respected and honored, who is more equipped than he was 560 00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:24,360 before his wife asked him. And you have a husband who's 561 00:32:24,360 --> 00:32:26,200 closer to church leadership than before. 562 00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:30,480 And you have a pastor who still feels honored and respected. 563 00:32:30,480 --> 00:32:31,960 And that's what really matters most. 564 00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:33,160 Is your pastor. OK? 565 00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:38,200 So I haven't lost anything. Bride hasn't lost anything, but 566 00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:40,080 husbands have gained much indeed. 567 00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:41,840 The church has gained much indeed. 568 00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:46,880 And so this is common practice. Most, most normal practice. 569 00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:50,680 Ladies, sisters, would you take your questions first and 570 00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:53,120 foremost to your husband's? If you have a question, take it 571 00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:57,000 to your husband before you search AI, before you Google, 572 00:32:57,120 --> 00:33:00,880 before you ask your pastor, go to your covenant head and give 573 00:33:00,880 --> 00:33:05,200 him listen to me. Give him the honor of being your 574 00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:08,760 first ask, and you see, if that doesn't impact him in a drastic 575 00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:12,640 way, that I believe my husband to be wise and capable on my 576 00:33:12,640 --> 00:33:14,240 behalf. And so I'm going to take my 577 00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:17,040 questions to him. OK. 578 00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:19,720 Fifthly, and I believe this is last, I'm almost done. 579 00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:26,440 Back to first Peter. My exhortation to my sisters is 580 00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:31,880 to embrace what the scriptures call your weaker vessel status. 581 00:33:32,360 --> 00:33:34,640 Man, this is a spacemaker sermon indeed. 582 00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:39,480 Listen to these words first. Peter 3 verse 7 command to 583 00:33:39,480 --> 00:33:41,880 husbands. Likewise, husbands, live with 584 00:33:41,880 --> 00:33:46,880 your wives in an understanding way, showing honor, showing 585 00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:53,880 honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are joint 586 00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:58,440 heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may 587 00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:01,960 not be hindered. So show honor to your wife, live 588 00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:04,360 with her in an understanding way, showing honor to her as the 589 00:34:04,360 --> 00:34:09,120 weaker vessel, so that your prayers may not be hindered 590 00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:11,600 because she is a joint heir with you. 591 00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:14,920 So think about this with me if you're to, if you're to thump a 592 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:20,920 man, what you ought to hear is a funk, like an oak task full of 593 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:24,120 wine. You ought to hear a funk, a 594 00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:28,679 sturdy, unyielding, unbending boom when you thump a man. 595 00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:31,679 When you thump a woman, which you should never do, it's a 596 00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:33,080 illustration. Guys, come on. 597 00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:36,960 When you thump a woman, what you should hear is the soft and 598 00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:41,400 ringing tin of a crystal glass full of wine. 599 00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:47,760 Do you see the difference? One side you hear the thunk of a 600 00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:51,679 cask of oak. 1 you hear the tin. Now ask yourself, which is 601 00:34:51,679 --> 00:34:55,440 stronger? Well, the the oak is not going 602 00:34:55,440 --> 00:34:57,120 to. I mean, it can break, but it's 603 00:34:57,120 --> 00:34:59,680 not going to break as easily as the wine glass. 604 00:35:00,120 --> 00:35:01,720 Which is stronger? It's the oak. 605 00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:05,840 Now, brothers and sisters, which is better? 606 00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:10,720 Which is better? Well, stronger, right? 607 00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:13,840 No, of course not. They're just different. 608 00:35:14,040 --> 00:35:16,920 They're not better. Not one is not better with the 609 00:35:16,920 --> 00:35:18,280 oak cast. What you can do is take 610 00:35:18,280 --> 00:35:21,320 something precious and you can put it in there to be guarded 611 00:35:21,480 --> 00:35:25,840 and then you can bury it for a decade and it'll get better. 612 00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:28,000 It'll get richer, it'll get more mature. 613 00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:31,320 And then when you take it, but, but, but the problem is it'll 614 00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:33,000 get better and it'll get more mature. 615 00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:36,000 And it's all great and good down in the in the bowels of your 616 00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:42,400 castle, but what's the problem? Nobody can smell it, nobody can 617 00:35:42,400 --> 00:35:45,520 see it, and nobody can sip it. So what do you need? 618 00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:50,360 You need a lovely glass in which you can take that wine that's 619 00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:53,720 been protected. You can put it in the glass so 620 00:35:53,720 --> 00:35:56,760 that people like myself can swirl it around and look at the 621 00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:59,520 light coming through. We can smell it, we can see all 622 00:35:59,520 --> 00:36:02,880 the complexity of it. And it exists that the glass is 623 00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:09,520 designed to display, not to protect, to display again, which 624 00:36:09,520 --> 00:36:13,000 is better? Neither, They're just different. 625 00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:16,240 They're just different. So husbands, we're to show honor 626 00:36:16,240 --> 00:36:20,760 to our wife as a weaker vessel. Wives, don't try to avoid being 627 00:36:20,760 --> 00:36:24,240 what God has made you. Don't try and be an oak barrel 628 00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:26,480 when He has made you a crystal glass. 629 00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:31,160 Don't try to run the show because you will ruin it if you 630 00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:34,640 try and run the show. Seek to beautify the show 631 00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:38,840 because you are a woman, and as a woman you are the glory of the 632 00:36:38,840 --> 00:36:41,920 glory of God. So let me prove this by asking 633 00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:45,800 you what would have happened years ago if Eve would have laid 634 00:36:45,800 --> 00:36:50,200 aside her opportunity to trust her own judgement when she saw 635 00:36:50,280 --> 00:36:53,960 that the tree was a delight to the eyes and desirable to make 636 00:36:53,960 --> 00:36:57,400 one wise? She took, she ate, she gave to 637 00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:00,200 her husband with her. What would have happened if she 638 00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:03,720 would have? Just for a moment said Adam. 639 00:37:04,920 --> 00:37:08,400 What do you think remind me what God said. 640 00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:12,080 What should we do here? Lead me, protect me. 641 00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:14,560 I'm I'm being told something that's different. 642 00:37:14,720 --> 00:37:18,320 Sort this out for me Speak in way in here. 643 00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:20,280 What do you think would have happened? 644 00:37:21,080 --> 00:37:24,080 Well, we live in a culture that for decades has been preaching 645 00:37:24,080 --> 00:37:28,680 the I am woman and hear me roar sermons every TV show, every 646 00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:31,000 movie, every book. This is the sermon. 647 00:37:31,720 --> 00:37:36,320 And we wonder why women in our day, statistically, are more 648 00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:38,320 miserable than they've ever been. 649 00:37:38,720 --> 00:37:43,720 And we also wonder why there's an absolute absence of good, 650 00:37:43,720 --> 00:37:49,680 strong, wise men in our land. Perhaps, sisters, the men would 651 00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:54,000 rise up to glory if in the church, women showed them how 652 00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:57,640 much they are needed by leaning on them and trusting them. 653 00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:02,240 So sisters, does your husband know that you want him to lead, 654 00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:06,200 that you need him to lead? Or is he having to fight you 655 00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:09,960 tooth and nail every step of the way for headship of the home? 656 00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:15,840 Do you? Do you let your husband pray at 657 00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:19,560 meal time? Do you let him do that? 658 00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:22,960 Do you allow your husband time with his friends? 659 00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:27,960 Do you tell your husband this or that, or do you trust your 660 00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:31,080 husband to lead? Do you defer to your husband in 661 00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:34,320 things concerning the household? Do you thank him for leading and 662 00:38:34,320 --> 00:38:36,720 providing and protecting your family? 663 00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:39,080 Those things are are vastly different. 664 00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:41,600 Now. You might wonder why these 665 00:38:41,600 --> 00:38:44,240 things are important and why we should think so carefully about 666 00:38:44,240 --> 00:38:47,160 them. You might ask, how important are 667 00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:48,680 these things? Are they really important, just 668 00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:51,000 kind of important? Well, the answer is that they 669 00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:54,840 are essential, for these things display the gospel of Jesus 670 00:38:54,840 --> 00:38:58,200 Christ to a world that needs to see it fleshed out, not just 671 00:38:58,200 --> 00:38:59,040 here. It preached. 672 00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:02,560 The end of the text in Titus 2 where Paul requires women to 673 00:39:02,600 --> 00:39:05,640 enjoy their husbands and children, is so that the Word of 674 00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:08,680 God may not be reviled, and so that in everything they may 675 00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:10,640 adorn the doctrine of God our Savior. 676 00:39:11,360 --> 00:39:15,680 The world hears headship and submission and thinks abuse and 677 00:39:15,680 --> 00:39:19,640 tyranny, But when Christ is the example of headship and the 678 00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:22,200 church is the example of submission, then we should be 679 00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:25,240 able to see beauty beyond measure in these things. 680 00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:29,680 For what did Christ do with total sovereign authority? 681 00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:34,440 Answer that question, Christian. What did Christ do with 682 00:39:34,480 --> 00:39:37,160 uncompromised authority and lordship? 683 00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:41,520 Well, I'll tell you what he did. He laid aside His glory and 684 00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:44,080 became a man. He laid aside his royal 685 00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:47,160 privilege and embraced the role of a servant Lord. 686 00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:49,480 He did not lay aside His lordship. 687 00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:54,200 He used His lordship to serve His people, because that is what 688 00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:57,800 Lordship does. He took our sin, our guilt, our 689 00:39:57,800 --> 00:40:01,760 shame upon himself and took those things to a Roman cross so 690 00:40:01,760 --> 00:40:05,560 that they could all die there. He saw to it that all of our sin 691 00:40:06,280 --> 00:40:09,720 was laid in the grave with Him. And he saw to it that when he 692 00:40:09,720 --> 00:40:13,200 rose from the dead, your sins and mine did not. 693 00:40:13,720 --> 00:40:17,960 That's what he saw to. They remain buried to this day. 694 00:40:18,120 --> 00:40:21,960 His perfect righteousness becomes ours as a gift to be 695 00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:26,240 received by faith alone. That's what Lordship does. 696 00:40:26,840 --> 00:40:30,200 Therefore, this table is the table of headship and 697 00:40:30,200 --> 00:40:32,000 submission. If you don't like these things, 698 00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:35,400 you don't like this table. This table is the table of 699 00:40:35,400 --> 00:40:38,720 headship and submission, because it is the table where we are 700 00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:43,840 reenact weekly the breaking of our covenant head so that his 701 00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:47,000 broken wife might be made whole in him. 702 00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:50,480 If you can't see beauty there, you got all my pity in the 703 00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:52,560 world. It's the most beautiful idea 704 00:40:52,560 --> 00:40:55,560 ever. If you're living an unrepentant 705 00:40:55,560 --> 00:41:00,240 sin, greed, idolatry, fornication, homosexuality, this 706 00:41:00,240 --> 00:41:03,120 is not your table because it would be deadly for you. 707 00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:06,440 God's holiness would not be defiled by your presence here. 708 00:41:06,720 --> 00:41:09,040 OK, God's holiness is not in danger. 709 00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:14,480 An unrepentant Sinner would be in danger of being destroyed by 710 00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:16,840 the presence of God's holiness at the table. 711 00:41:16,880 --> 00:41:20,160 So for your own good, if you have not repented of your sin 712 00:41:20,160 --> 00:41:22,000 and trusted in Christ, this is not your table. 713 00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:25,600 It's dangerous for you. For your sake, do not come 714 00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:28,520 unless and until you renounce lifestyles that Christ 715 00:41:28,720 --> 00:41:31,440 abominates. But if you have repented of your 716 00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:35,400 sin and have been baptized into union with Christ, then this is 717 00:41:35,400 --> 00:41:38,480 your table, especially because you do not deserve it. 718 00:41:38,720 --> 00:41:41,920 You've repented, you've trusted in Christ, and yet you're still 719 00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:44,720 in process. Your this is your table. 720 00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:48,240 It's, it's for you. Christ is our Savior as well as 721 00:41:48,240 --> 00:41:50,600 our Lord. He delights, like all good 722 00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:54,840 husbands, for his bride to bring her problems to him that he 723 00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,960 might solve them. And so, brother, sister in 724 00:41:57,960 --> 00:42:02,400 Christ, bring your imperfections to him right here and right now. 725 00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:04,680 Bring your lingering sense of shame. 726 00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:09,160 Bring them to Christ because it is his desire to take them from 727 00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:13,280 you so that he can leave in its place the fullness of joy. 728 00:42:13,520 --> 00:42:17,320 Listen to me, Don't dare not to dare. 729 00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:20,080 You come and welcome to Jesus Christ. 730 00:42:20,240 --> 00:42:25,840 Let me pray for us. Father, we ask in the name of 731 00:42:25,920 --> 00:42:30,280 Jesus as your covenant bride, the covenant bride of Christ 732 00:42:31,040 --> 00:42:35,880 that was fashioned from his wounded side, presented back to 733 00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:37,720 Him as a bride in glory and splendor. 734 00:42:37,720 --> 00:42:40,920 We ask that you would grant this table to be for us what it needs 735 00:42:40,920 --> 00:42:45,640 to be, a real participation in the body of Christ together. 736 00:42:46,040 --> 00:42:49,600 Holy Spirit, would you draw near to us taking the wine, taking 737 00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:52,920 the bread, and make them efficacious to us? 738 00:42:52,960 --> 00:42:57,640 I pray, Lord, for for those struggling with a lingering 739 00:42:57,640 --> 00:43:00,800 sense of sin, guilt and shame, that at this table they would 740 00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:06,320 find real freedom as they chew and meditate upon the gospel of 741 00:43:06,320 --> 00:43:08,680 the Lord Jesus Christ. We ask it in his name. 742 00:43:09,320 --> 00:43:10,560 Amen. Amen.