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you. Fucking Craig.
Baby.
I still need the link. I forgot I have to pull up.
I I forgot I had to pull up 3D and D beyond tabs for my 3
fucking characters. Oh my God, I forgot.
Oh yeah. I forgot about that too
actually. I got.
Close one of mine. Buckle this.
Man, this man said. Buckle up.
Oh, I could have said. Be ready 'cause my my D&D Beyond
bookmark just like pulls me into Valmyra.
And I was like, hold up a second.
I, like, forgot I actually had to pull up and like, go back
into my characters and pull up the other the other two
characters as well. All of the names of my
characters are so vastly different, they're all over the
place, and I'm just like, why did I not name everyone the
same? This is rude, yeah, But if you
named them all the same, then you would be like, why did I
name my characters all the same fucking thing?
Well, at least like start them all with the same letter.
No, no, no, no, no rhyme. You can talk to me, me mommy,
about that. Yeah, me, me, Mommy is hard
enough. Let's let's not play the name
game. I keep mine down to one or two
syllables at top at most. Oh man.
Or if you do, don't in the case of Ash.
And then you got a who has got the longest name out of everyone
I've seen so far but still has a single syllable for the
reference. Yeah, Ashlyn, Mavilyn, Colt.
Something with Ack or something I can't remember now.
Yeah, I've. Lost it.
Oh oh oh I forgot I forgot. Ash has like 4 names.
Yeah, Maviola Ashland Desdemona Croy Jesus.
The longest killed my father name to die to.
Die. It's.
Like, it's like Percival von Musel.
Koloski Girolo. Frederickstein Girolo.
The Third. Yep.
Am I supposed to know what's
wrong? It's a Vox.
Mock it up from critical role. Critical.
Oh yeah, Critical. Critical role.
Campaign one, The best campaign. I'm almost done with Campaign
two. It's just not as good.
No spoilers. No spoilers.
Have you not done Campaign 2?
Oh, I'm currently listening to campaign one, so.
Oh, campaign one is so good. It's top tier.
Yeah, and I am. I am re listening to Campaign
one with Justin. I want to re listen to it.
And I'm not even done with Campaign Two.
I'm already like, give me back in.
I want to go back. Yeah, I I listened.
I listened to the first few episodes of Campaign 2.
I forgot how far I got with campaign two.
And then campaign three got released.
And I was like, oh, like I would like, I want to start with like
the new campaign, like be able to like watch their stuff live
as they're releasing it. But then they were like making
callbacks to stuff. And I was like, no, I should
like just like, I should just like, yeah, it's all, yeah, I
was like, I should just like go back.
I should just go back and like start from the very beginning
and and then I was like and then I told Justin about Critical
Role while I was listening to campaign too.
And he's like, all right, I'm going to get into it.
And then he like started talking about some stuff about that I'd
forgotten about. And I was like, all right, well
I should go back and re listen to campaign one with him.
But then I was like getting confused and I was like, I
should just listen to like one campaign at a time and not try
to like, no, listen to like 2. Campaigns I would not be able.
To listen to multiple I'm currently I literally just
paused episode 109 of Campaign Two that I I started this at
like the beginning of the year. Like it takes a long fucking
time, 'cause this one's even longer than Vox Machina.
Oh damn. Yeah.
And then it's like, and then I have to get into Campaign 3,
which they're already like 80 plus episodes into.
And I'm just like, I'm, I know it's like crushing.
It's like crushing my soul because like, I wanted to try to
like, I like wanted to like watch Campaign three as they
were releasing it. But like, I was like felt like I
was behind on like the lore because I hadn't listened to
Campaign 2. Yeah.
I was like, Oh no. And I was like, well, there's no
way I'm catching up now because they're already at like episode
90 of campaign three. No, I've like, I've kind of
realized that I'm probably going to catch up to being live with
them when they end campaign 3. And I'm going to be so sad.
I know, I know. But like it's been, it's been
good to like re listen to campaign one like alongside
Justin because like I because when I first listened to
campaign one, like I was the only one I knew listening to it.
So like I didn't have anyone to like talk to about it or like
bounce ideas off or like anything like that.
So it's been nice to like listen to it with Justin and then have
him like listening to it for the first time and be able to like
spitball ideas of like where he thinks it's going.
And like me, having already listened to it, just kind of be
able to like just kind of like just kind of like sit there and
smile and nod and let's just, like, not say anything.
Yeah, it it kills me. So yeah, I think, I think I'm, I
think I'm on episode like 4142 Dragons, the Chroma conclaves
taking over Iman and they're like deal.
They're like through the city dealing with the clasp and
everything like that. And I have having watched like
the Amazon show, I know they they go to Vaseline high and
some. Yeah, yeah, The Amazon show.
Gets you up to oh. I want to say like, I don't even
know what episode it is. Like, it gets you decently far.
Yeah, it's like 60 or 70 or something like somewhere around
there. But they skip over the beginning
parts of so like episodes like 1.
Through episodes. Yeah, like episodes like one
through 20 are not animated, but then like 20 through like 60 or
70, like are animated. And it's kind of like the show,
like, gets you like pretty far into it, but then it's like, Oh
my God, everything. Oh, you're going to love it.
That's all I have to say. I'm super excited.
But you know what? I'm also excited for killing
Franklin. So.
What do we have? Game Master.
That's murder, Franklin. Murder.
Murder.
All right.
Welcome everyone, to Secret Invasion.
Part three-part four, I think. Finale 75.
Earth 69. Yeah, like we're gonna end on
69. Come on, it's a self fulfilling
cross here. It's a snake that eats its own
tail. Yeah.
Yeah, Josh is right. If we don't end on 69, then
we're doing it wrong. Exactly.
So the story as it stands now, Josh in the game gave Franklin
an evil item, The Book of Vile Darkness, which contains secret
knowledge and rituals. This book turned him undead and
truly evil. In this set of realities,
Franklin has used his secret knowledge as well as the iPhone
that Regina got in our last eurythmic veracity to build a
teleporter to our world with the intention of starting a zombie
apocalypse. Killing me and maybe something
else. I was given a torque last
eurythmic and have been working actively since then to escape to
Tarth. There's a government agency that
has been led by Samuel L Jackson that exists to close rifts in
time and space. However, many of their members
have been dying off as they have been actively hunting me as I
try to gather resources to escape.
The group then got drafted by this organization and was sent
to the last location of one of their members at a portal, a
rift in space and time. Upon arrival, the group found
the portal and which led into a room in Tara that looked like a
staging point. Clues were found linking it to
Tara. Jess blew herself up by grabbing
a bomb. Josh shit himself and Olivia
took a pocket rocket that was hooked up to the.
Teleporter. Across across the street of the
port from the location of the portal at the Ross Correctional
Facility, they then fought with one of the undead root monsters
that Regina had been using to try to create a familiar in the
D&D world of Taurus, which was making which was able to take
bodies and turn them into undead.
There they learned that Franklin and and his cohorts had been
taking prisoners, turning them into zombies, and shipping them
off N to the Columbus airport. The group geared up after
meeting me with me once again at the prison, kidnapped one of the
guards and headed to the airport.
There they fought a zombie horde and blew up the plane that was
being loaded to then rain zombies down on the countryside
to start the apocalypse. They then headed downtown to the
center of a storm, where Franklin and Coe are sacrificing
player characters to feed a ritual spell that feeds into an
item that looks very similar to the bomb Jess blew up herself
with. However, because the group had
intended to trick Franklin by kidnapping the guard and making
them look like me to trap him in the pocket pocket, this failed,
however, when Josh tripped down the embankment face planted, and
was shot in the head by none other than Flint.
Let's see. Currently the fighting has
ensued and someone has. And Vimyra, I believe has snuck
up behind the group and is secretly untying some of the
player characters that Franklin and his crew are using to feed
the ritual. And now the tear or the sky
shakes and bends and tears, and Johnny returns home from work to
find an empty apartment but for one new but for a business card
that sits on a counter in your kitchen.
So no. No note was left by Jess, but
she should be here. What do you do?
If I walk in the house I like, I always do, I call for her, let
her know I'm home, get no response.
Look at the cats. Cats are looking a little little
nervous, a little hungry. Spend a few days and I just
start wandering around the house calling Jess's name, find her
anywhere. Then I go back into the kitchen
where I'm like, OK, well, when was the last time she cooked
something? Because she always leaves a mess
in the ketchup. So you're welcome.
And that's when I see the cart. Writing on the card is a set of
initials, and it reads in silvery letters the wizard
formerly known as Matt Place here or Push here for contact.
The hell is this? It's a card, not a link.
OK, I amuse the idea by pushing on it.
You hear and feel in your head a haptic buzz is.
This. Hello, This is Matt.
Well, the wizard formerly known as Matt.
What's up? Who is this what you called?
Hi, you called me. Matt.
Like, like D&D, Matt. Yeah, that's me.
What the hell? What's happening?
Well, that's a long. Fucking story here.
Why don't I just? You hear and then next to you,
you hear. And then reality tears open in a
bluish kind of magical like rift as stepping out of a portal.
You see me dressed as a wizard with a utility belt and covered
in guns, hey? What the fucking shit is this?
Hear it. Take these mushrooms and I hand
you a mushroom. You have some drugs.
Drugs. Yeah, 'cause that's that's the
greatest way to walk into a scenario here, have these
mushrooms. So.
I wish I did. That.
For me. I mean if I took these before
all this happened then it would all make sense.
Yeah, it would. You remember, I kind of snapped
my fingers. You remember in D&D, like the
arrhythmic veracity in the thing we like drank the reality, which
is made out of mushrooms. It's like a mushroom tea.
This is one of those mushrooms, and if you eat one, you're going
to get magic powers, too. That's really oversimplification
of it. I You see me snap my fingers and
a ball of flame appears in my hand.
I begin juggling it. Hot potato.
Let's see if I drop it.
Well, don't drop it in my house. Shit.
But OK, you convinced me. I don't.
All right, so we don't have a whole lot of time.
I'm sorry, this should come as a whole.
Like sit down explanation, but I can't really do that right now.
So Long story short Franklin, OK, we'll back up a sack.
D&D, the whole thing, the whole world.
That's real. Everything is real.
Magic is real. That's magic exists in this
world, but not very much of it. But because we took this stuff
in your rhythmic veracity and last time I came back with this
here torque and I point at my neck, lets me talk to my like
the D&D God. Really interesting person in it
by the way. Anyway, so I found out magic is
real. Became a wizard.
I started this whole, you know, first I was a crusader trying to
make things better. I killed a bunch of people.
They're bad people. Don't worry about that though.
But then I realized, like, this place sucks, 'cause you can't
really re get spells by just resting.
So I figured I'd contact the rest of you guys and try to
escape Tara to Tara. To that end, I've got this whole
other plan, but we can go over that later.
But right now Franklin also knows this and hates me because
I gave him pretty much the bad worst back story and the like
possible. And so he came to Earth
teleporting here, which is what I want to do, but there with the
intention of finding and killing me.
Also starting a zombie apocalypse and I think
destroying the world. That's the short of it right
now. The others are currently, I
think, fighting him right now, but I can't go there because
he's got a basically a nuclear bomb and he's just going to flip
the switch, I would assume, if I could show up.
So I and you, if you're all right with it, are going to go
to a secret government organization that had God that
had gotten the others to work for them.
And then I got a little thing that lets me track them so I can
go there and steal their shit because we need more of these
reality mushrooms, which they have, but we only have a very
small supply. Plus I want to steal their other
stuff and you know, maybe shut down the any Intel they have on
me. So God, I kind of sit down and
start breathing between my legs. Sorry.
So that's where we are right now.
And if you're interested in leaving this reality, leaving
Earth and go Adventure and Tara and BD and D characters, but not
really D&D characters, but our own characters, I think.
Unless we're being controlled by somebody else.
Have you ever heard of Simulation Theory?
I like really wigged out right now.
The whole time I'm just staring at you as these mushrooms are
hitting just wide eyed mouth again.
I'm like, listening to this. I'm like, have you, are you on
toke right now? Yeah.
Is he with us? In front of us?
Like like like meta, meta, metagaming wise.
I'm like what's happening here? Take some amphetamines, I call
it. Go Juice.
Go Juice, Definitely made. You go.
Called it hand stability. No.
So yeah, that's where we are right now.
And since you just took the mushrooms, you would experience
yourself becoming more yourself. You gain all of the levels of
your player character class. You yourself physically become
not sharper, but more distinguished.
Very as you as you level up, your appearance begins, becomes
more like chiseled and like accentuates your features more
than anyone or more than like other stuff.
So you would probably also feel that change as well.
He just sat up in his chair and like, stuck his boobies out and
was just like. My back hurts the hell.
I thought you were trying. To like show off.
No, stretching my back. That lower back pain you
normally have gone. Fuck.
Give me more. So that's where we are right
now. Let me know how you want to
walk, move forward. You either stay here, come with
me, or whatever. But I got to go.
Yeah, like pretty quick. Really like start stepping my
fingers like so. How do I make fire happen all?
Right. Well, I don't know what class
are you. I like guns.
I hand you one of the guns that I'm holding.
I'm playing as like I'm high out of my mind.
Oh. Got it.
Nice. I hand you a gun, OK?
Just don't point it at me. OK, I think I told you earlier,
I'm a Ranger. Yeah, Oh my God, twinsies.
I have a long neck rifle and several pistols that you could
take, and the way they work it's a crossbow and a heavy crossbow
respectively, with one additional hit die.
Shit goes hard. You don't even understand
Damaged die. Damaged, Die said.
Hit the sword. I knew what you meant.
I like the big one. I hand it to you.
OK, so if you're interested, I'm gonna go to the secret
organization and try to steal everything they have.
It's probably gonna involve fighting these dudes.
I wave my hands in front of your face.
You OK with that? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
If there's more mushrooms that I could see Jess and make sure
she's OK, yeah. Jess won't be there, but we'll
see her eventually. OK, 'cause like, if someone's
going to hurt her, I'm going to shoot him.
Yeah, we'll try to avoid that. And as you say that the the
camera pans out through the glass of the apartment and out
to the city, or zooming farther and further out and then zooming
down in to the city of Columbus from above, where a giant storm
is currently taking place. Helicopters, Police helicopters
fly through the air towards the epicenter of the storm, battered
and thrown about by the wild winds as the wind itself begins
looking less like wind and more like disembodied souls being
pulled to the center of the storm.
Back at the center of the storm, I believe we are at the start of
combat or at the the next. Let's see the start of the turn
order where at this location you can see a number of individuals
tied up along the banks. Franklin the Turtle walking up
and down their lines, pulling life force out of them and
feeding it into the ritual fear that sits that is about the size
of a bowling bowl that he carries Next to him.
Flint stands guard with his weapons and arrayed across the
yard in the courtyard in the Plaza.
The rest of the characters now stand actively in combat.
We will start at the top of the round with Justin.
Gotta move the bookmark. There, yeah, Can you?
Bring it so I do have to move the bookmark.
So. Yeah.
Are our player locations saved from last time?
Yeah. Yeah, they stay in the same
place where we were. I forgot I was down to like half
of my hand points. Goddamn.
Yeah, I'm not doing that right either.
I'm toggling. I'll toggle around right now,
and if I remember correctly, Franklin moved on from the first
person. I don't know who that is with
like the wood underneath of them, right?
Oh, that's my that's my monk. Sonora.
So.
So he didn't, didn't he? Didn't he?
Stop fucking with Sonora and move.
On Yeah, he hit her. He hit her once for so for a bit
of damage, and now she's just kind of stuck there.
Can't. Do.
Anything he's moving down the line, All of them appear
incapacitated as they have their hands bound behind their backs.
A gag and yeah. And.
I am kinky. Sorry, I'm just I'm.
Just trying. I'm trying to get this.
Thing Yeah, Franklin's moved on to Mime.
Mime is very much like. That's the great that's the
green shirt icon there. Yep.
And just make sure I have the the setting right.
Voy Myra has essentially like turned tails trying to help
people. Like untie people.
Yes, she's stealth hard. She's stealth hard.
That's what she's doing, though you probably don't know that as
a person. Well, no, I understand.
I understand that. But I don't.
I don't see any of that. I'm just trying to get an idea.
So I don't see anything else beyond that.
I don't know what's happening. I think when I remember what I
wanted to do before the scene ended last time, I'd like to
move to what is that right there?
Is that like a a little like cart type thing in the middle of
the stairwell? Like bottom of the stairwell to
my right. This thing.
Yeah. So that's a bouncy house.
As I described it, there was a birthday party, like a
children's birthday party going on here.
This is the children's birthday party.
What the fucker? Thing looks like they're having
a good time. It's fine because Franklin's
also a child, so so. I'm going to.
I'm going to use my movement to move move.
No, it's not OK. Oh yeah, All the bodies for the
children. I for the children and the
parents. I forgot about that.
Yeah. And and also one more question
and then I'll, I'll, I'll take my turn.
Franklin has one hand towards Mei Mei and one hand towards the
the cylindrical volleyball sized thing.
Like he's kind of like transferring energy through
himself towards it, yes. That's correct.
He's basically acting as a conduit, pulling health from one
and feeding it to the other. OK, I'm going to move towards
the the bouncy house, give myself a little bit of cover.
I'm going to pull out my the, the long sniper and kind of like
steady myself on the bouncy house best I can because it's a
bouncy house and I want to take a shot.
I want to take a shot at Franklin's hand.
Not the one that's directed towards May May, but the one
that's right towards the bomb. Yeah, I will allow cold shots,
though a cold shot will impose disadvantage if you're OK with
that. What do you mean, Cold shot not
setting up? No, a cold shot being.
I want to target one specific thing.
Like I want to shoot him in the legs so he can't run.
I want to shoot him in the hand so he drops the thing.
I want to shoot him in the OK eye so he gets blinded, that
kind of thing. All right.
I just do have a scope, right? Yeah, but I I would assume
you're. Also like 20 feet away is.
That 20 feet, it's. Not that 30 feet.
It's not that far. Feet.
But how far does the scope zoom in?
It's 30 feet. You're you're you're not wrong.
So I'm I'm also like running over to a position and trying to
steady myself immediately. I couldn't.
I could see a disadvantage for sure.
Especially if I'm trying to shoot for a particular spot.
All right, I'll still take it. I'm aiming for his hand.
That's the one that's towards the bomb.
So the the out conduit. That is a small target I
understand now. That's what she said, That's
what she said. Hey.
Six, unfortunately. With a six, you you run up to
the bouncy house, lean up against it and kind of first
peer down the scope, realizing it's kind of zoomed in too far.
And then you kind of have to eyeball it a little bit.
And as you pull the trigger, your balance against the bouncy
house falters as it kind of like is a bouncy house and kind of
folds with your pressure, like the pressure of your weight
causing the bullet to kind of just zip by and Franklin kind of
turns to look at you and then like narrows his eyes stop it.
With, with, with the Super zoomed in scope, do I see
Franklin's small penis? If you zoom in really, really
far, yeah, it's really shriveled.
It looks like it's never been used.
And actually, give me give me a investigation or perception
check. As you zoom in on his skin 16
with a 16, you notice that there seems to be a lot of little like
line work kind of crisscrossing his skin now.
And as you're still zoomed in, you see one part of his like
waist move and you come to the sudden realization that all of
his flesh has been converted into bugs that have just that
are just all crammed in and like representing like Flash.
I I think to myself doesn't even have a spell that you forget
that. All right, so with the with the
rest of my movement, because I I can move 15 feet probably I'm
going to move around the backside of the bouncy house to
just have full cover. Perfect.
And then Barrett's going to be on deck.
And then at the start of the next round, I'll have me and
Johnny roll for initiative as well.
Sounds good. I have a question.
So, so I see there are turn order includes our like player
characters, right. Like I'm on here, Josh is on
here. What about our like are we not
playing, am I not playing? We had the, we had them going on
our turn, I'm pretty sure. Yeah, I was saying, yeah.
If you get a second character. That's.
Right. Yeah.
I forgot. OK, my bad.
Those that are incapacitated still are still incapacitated,
so you can't really do much. Yeah.
No released. Sad my monk.
If she was released, would be so awesome and I just have to wait.
Make some moves. Well, there's someone over there
to try to free them, so I just have to wait for her to free
her. True.
All right, Barrett. And then Jesse up next, yeah.
OK, I have marked off that I've used to spell slots.
I don't remember the. Use.
I don't remember if a Hunter's marked someone or not.
I if I remember correctly, you did Hunter's Mark.
I think you. I think it was either Flint.
I can't remember. I think it might have been
Flint. Yeah 'cause I believe Flint also
shot you. Yeah, he did.
He took out. Half of my health.
Bang Bang. Oh yeah, Flint's a fucking boss.
My turn and go. Oh yeah, he.
Was. Going on your turn because you
were playing him. Yeah.
Do you want do you want Jonny to roll for Flint now?
Yeah, Why don't you go ahead and roll for Flint and then that'll
be the same turn order for you as a person in a bit.
OK, in the beyond I'm just looking at a a blank white grid.
Or, oh, no, you're talking about roll, roll 20, roll 20.
Oh 'cause I have to make his character, right?
Yep. I need a token.
You have to Yeah. Flint.
Flint is right here on top of
the Mound of Bodies. Oh my.
God, it's so hard to see. He's just like hiding in there.
Yeah, he's disguised within there.
OK, yeah, so I Hunter's marked him.
I assumed he would go for the high ground and have the
Hamilton's gun and just be popping people off.
So I don't see you in the drop down list, Johnny do.
What? I don't see you in the drop down
list. Maybe I need to refresh?
Are you in the right roll 20? I sent a link to the Secret
Invasion one. Yeah, but I also.
What's it? I also what?
What sparked at it like seeing infinite sees?
No, it's supposed to be Secret Invasion.
Hold on, let me see if I can. I thought I had done it
correctly. But one minute.
Yeah, Secret Invasion. OK, sorry.
I had made two of them on accident and one of them I
worked on and I was like, oh shit.
As this is happening, everyone looks in front of them and they
see a wheel, a little buffering wheel almost happening and the
whole world stops for one moment and that wheel finishes.
You you, you wave your hand through the wheel and it seems
to be a mirage and you wonder once again, is this all just a
simulation? I've had some.
Drunken nights like that babe, Are we in the simulation?
Waking her up at like 3 or 4 in the morning.
He has done that. He has done that.
He is woke me up in the middle of the night and gone babe, do
you think we're in the simulation And I'm like, yeah,
probably. Chances are pretty high.
Enjoy. Your simulated rest?
Come on. Then why would some bastard
simulate me with a 2 inch penis? You ever played femmes?
That's why. Hell yeah.
Why have I not drowned yet? All right, I'm going.
To shoot. Hamilton twice because this
motherfucker took out. So much of my.
Health. But whoa, wait, what?
Hamilton's dead. Oh, yeah, I have Flint.
Sorry. Sorry.
I'll say that would just enrage. Flint is a bad guy right here,
all right. Lint's in rage mode already.
Lint isn't. Rage showed because Hamilton's
dead. And how'd he die?
We don't know. Circumstances.
He just was dead. It's too bad he didn't identify
so much. Of my health.
So I'm shooting him back. This is retribution, OK?
What was saying, Matt? It's too bad you didn't get that
headdress identified in time. That's a 23 to hit Flint.
Yeah, that hit. OK, cool.
And now let me do all my damage. Oh, 13 plus 09 plus Hunter's
Mark. Damage math. 26 damage on the
first shot. So my well no.
My Flint still has his HP from Maniopolis.
Let me check. Oh, like your last session you
mean? Are you sure?
Because I did reset that and start taking damage for you.
I was like, didn't he take damage last session?
Yeah, yeah. Josh was in there.
Yeah, Josh was in there doing all his stuff.
Yeah, it's been. What, two or three months since
I played? Yeah.
You're at the correct amount of damage.
OK. Because you were even lower than
that when the last time you played Minneapolis.
I have no idea how we're going to remember that, but.
Presumably too. That it's been well, I don't
think we. Were in the middle of combat in.
No, you guys keep going back into the pocket pocket rocket
after combat. Paki.
Rocky. Paki.
Rocky. OK, yeah, that was the that was
the first shot. I get a second shot.
So. OK.
Oh. I don't think a 13.
Hit. I don't think a 13 hits though.
No, but I'll use my reaction of. Oh no.
Tectonic energy what? Yeah, get ready to have somebody
that actually knows their character play it.
Scary. Does it display in here?
Yes. And this is as a reaction.
Well, actually, you know what? Where are we?
You're out. You're standing on a hole of
dead bodies. Yeah, you're standing on the
birthday party. Yeah, you're up here, all right.
Yeah, Does your thing have a? Range to where it can act so I.
10 feet that would also help better if I.
Knew I'm I am 50 feet from you. OK, well, I'm still getting the
balance of where everything's at.
I'm over. I'm over here.
This is where I'm shooting you from.
You are right here. Also that isn't that isn't a
reaction I don't think. It is so.
You can. Use this reaction a number of
times equal to your proficiency bonus.
It does say reaction. When you take damage from a
creature that is within 10 feet of you, you can use your
reaction to emanate telekinetic energy.
Oh, telekinetic. Not OK.
That's what I was getting. Yeah, I I always say tectonic.
There we. Go.
Yeah. I'm not within 10 feet of you,
so that wouldn't take effect. OK, so we're going to rewind
because I didn't know where we was all standing at.
Yeah. And I will use my hellish
rebuke. Oh no.
How much? Do you have?
To you have to make a deck deck saving throw.
Oh, OK. I mean, I'm pretty good at
those. Not when I roll A4, I'm not.
It's an 11. Says a deck.
Say what you Oh. Deck save versus you were spell
save DC. Yeah, so you had to be thirteen
or? Higher.
Yeah, it's gotten 11. Oh, oh, that hurts.
Damn. Oh, I'm really not looking good,
guys. I'm really not doing good.
And then I'm going to use my movement.
To run further away. Sorry, Josh.
I'm behind a tree. Yeah, I'm trying to like, get
like, behind these trees over here.
I'm just trying to get the fuck away.
But as you're running. Josh is holding his face
together. Yeah.
I'm mushed most of it back into place.
So so as you turn tail and run, use your movement speed to run
away from that reaction. I can then take an opportunity
attack. No.
No, no, 'cause they're she's not with you.
I'm not within opportunity attack range.
Oh, OK. Yeah.
OK. So that's that's.
Barrett's turn. Barrett's hurting, so Nora's
incapacitated. She can't escape yet.
Let her out. Did you try to roll?
Did did you try to roll? Is there anything for me to
roll? Is there a way for?
DM, is there a way? For me to use Zanora's action to
try and escape her bindings. She So everybody is
incapacitated which that's what it was condition I believe says
that there's no. Yeah, you can't like do
anything, I'm pretty sure, yeah. But you probably, I mean you can
make it. Roll Take actions or reactions.
You literally just can't do anything.
So. Well, you can make a role to
notice that your allies are currently being united by
someone. Yeah, What would that be?
Perception. No, I can't.
I if I remember correctly, it was a very high stealth role, if
it might be sneaky like that. I mean, she got a 19, but I
don't think her stealth role was a 19.
I think it was higher than that. Should still be back here.
DEXA Potion of Healing. My You're talking about my role?
Yeah. Her Stealth was a 22.
Yeah. No.
Oh. Yeah.
Yeah, Zanora has no would. My would my like myself would
only be like for other people noticing me not necessarily.
Like she rolled a she rolled a 19 to try to perceive that you
were help like there and helping which yeah, because I feel like
the person that I'm helping like they would so if you.
Got it. I mean, so you haven't actively
helped her yet, but if you're not actively hiding from, you
know. Oh, right 'cause I helped.
You're helping. I helped.
I helped Mimi first. Yeah, but you could have.
Totally. Like I helped Mimi.
Whispered to everyone. And be like hey, I'm untying
you. Yeah, I wouldn't do that though.
I would just like non verbally help me may.
That's fair. Then you would not know that
she's currently helping you. As you are in Capacitated, you
can't turn your head backwards to look behind you.
Yeah 'cause can't do shit 'cause I was only able to help one
person at the time, so I just non verbally helped me May and
united her so me May would know I'm there, but I would have no
inclination to like let, although I yeah, I would have no
inclination to let other people know I'm there.
OK, we can play it that way then.
Yeah, that character unfortunately can't do much
right now. How fun.
OK, until freely. God damn Franklin.
OK, wait, so Justin is over here, right?
That's. Just yes.
K you've been you've been attacking or trying to.
What are you talking about? You just tried to shoot
Franklin? And I'll shoot the sky behind
him. I was trying to help him.
It's fine. Yeah, no, Palin doesn't believe
that. So she's gonna move over there
and she will. She's going to try to cast hold
person on you, so. Wisdom save, I think.
Yeah, Wisdom save the D CS at 16, so.
Jess is getting flashbacks to the eurythmic.
That he's never been to. The 13 rib.
Oh, you are officially paralyzed and at the end of each of your
future turns you can try to save against it, but you are
paralyzed. And now my DC don't sound so
don't sound so happy about it. Who whose side do you want here?
Both. Obviously.
Now my DC for Wild Magic is a four.
So let's see, that's a three Wild Magic baby.
Pew. Pew.
Roll your D. 100 I believe it is, right.
Yeah, I gotta roll my D100, so let's roll a percentage.
Just the standard table that you have, she does.
Yeah, just the standard wild magic table.
Let's see D100. That's a 34.
What do we have, Vanna? Every time you speak a pink pink
bubble. Who's pulling up?
Who's pulling up the wild magic table?
Or should I just pull it up? I'll just pull it up.
Oh, I thought you had it already up my bed.
Oh, so hang on here, 34. It's this one.
It's pretty. Good.
Yeah. Phelan's a wild magic match.
Customize the damage of the next damaging spell you cast within
the next minute. Oh, sweet.
Oh shit. What does it?
Do. Damage.
And Justin's Justin.
You could crit on Justin if you ran up and hit him.
I could, I couldn't. I have no strength though, so I
can't really melee him. But magic missile?
Oh y'all are fucked. That's a good one.
Evil laugh. Cute evil laugh.
Yeah, I. Wonder why you're on Franklin's
team? OK, that's all of my.
That's all my characters so. All right then.
Jess, you're you are up with Olivia on deck.
Did we get Flint in here, by the way?
Yeah, I'm waiting for his roll. Oh.
Yeah, you need to roll on. It make sure he clicks his
character before he rolls, so it's.
Yeah. On your token, click your
character icon. Yes, for you it's.
You as Flint. Yeah.
'Cause I'm just having everyone roll play their characters on
their turns so that we don't have 40 turn orders.
Damn. And.
Eight. You get to go before me, buddy.
Oh yeah, I forgot you were A5. One of the reasons I rolled down
the hill. That's right.
All right, Jess, go ahead as both you and Kat.
I I wanna. I have a gun in my hand.
Hold on. I'm trying to find my notes.
I have a gun. I have a gun.
Guys I have. A gun in my hand.
Sniper rifle. OK, just it's right in the
middle of the page. Sniper rifle.
I'm the one with the concussion here.
So I want to take aim with the sniper rifle at CAT and it is
supposed to be the equivalent of what was it, a heavy crossbow.
Heavy Crossbow with one additional damage dice.
Oh awesome. Yes, fight yourself, Jess.
I totally fucking miss, yeah. The shot definitely goes wide
because the four does not hit. You hear the.
Crack. Crack of your rifle when I look
over at you and I just say chicken wacker.
Just like I don't want to get close to it, but I guess so.
I do have two weapon fighting. Could I possibly like drop the
sniper rifle right next to Josh and grab the chicken wacker and
just like run up on cat like Happy Gilmore and take a swing
at him? So with the chicken wacker
against cat, you will roll with advantage.
I would say it's God, what would that be?
A club? Yeah, I was going.
To say I have club in my inventory because I didn't know
what else to put. Yeah, let's do.
It'll be a club. Considered magical damage and a
hit always does Max damage against this creature.
Oh awesome. The chicken wagger is very nice,
specifically against cat. Yeah, so I'm definitely going to
do that miss with the sniper rifle.
Just fuck. Throw it down next to Josh, pull
out the chicken wagger and just start running up.
Wait, yeah, right up on cat and just take a swing with this.
Do I add anything with? This rule.
It's at an advantage. Oh, OK 22.
Oh yeah. That definitely hits.
Your form perfect, your swing sublime.
And I just made contact with this poor little chicken.
Is it damage the same as a club A1D4?
Oh yeah, but it's Max damage plus your strength or decks or
whatever you're using. I have a + 0 in both of those,
so nothing. Oh yeah.
So poor damage, but also I need cat to make a a strength saving
throw DC-10 and ADC 12 or what's your spellsafe DC say that
instead. My spellsafe DC is 17.
So with an 18 strength save, Cat manages to stay in place and is
not smacked 20 feet backwards into the air.
But does he take any damage? A whole 4 damage.
Still takes the four damage. Oh, I did something.
A light golf clap behind you from the trees.
And I'm just standing there. I'm like, oh fuck, this probably
isn't great and I think that is all I can do.
Cat. Yep, me standing.
This cat Are you your worst nightmare?
Your enemy. I hate this bitch.
Why did you do this to me? He is going to cast Flaming
Sphere, a 5 foot diameter sphere.
Fire on myself. I'll just Yeah.
Why didn't this go through? Did it go and I must make a
Dexterity saving throw? Yay.
Oh. 18 Spell Save DC, right? Yeah, it is 17.
Oh. Nice.
So I make the save. Fuck yeah.
You guys are basically dancing around each other.
You know each other so well that you swing with the club and she.
You still take damage. It takes half damage.
Got it. Yeah, so I still take 2D6 of
damage. So I should just roll damage.
Yeah, roll damage and then have it because you keep looking at
the wrong thing. Hold on, I keep opening up the
wrong character sheet. Like what you've done to us.
There's so many character. Sheets I don't know how to do.
This guys. OK, so five.
So what would that be, 3, round up or round down?
I usually round down. South two, round down.
So two. OK, I'm actually not doing that
bad. I have more health than cat.
It's. A wizard?
Isn't she cat? Is.
Definitely. The cat is looking very pissed
off now. It's just gonna kind of like
squawk and anger and flap their wings and then Ash, I'm gonna
guess gets to go right after that, right?
Ash is still in combat. Oh yeah.
OK, yeah, didn't get taken out yet, only 13 HP, but she's still
there. And since she's standing, since
I like ran up on both of them, I'm within arm's reach and she's
going to attack with the vicious dagger of sacrifice.
Oh God. 11:00 Well Nope 15 which hits Oh no guys.
Are slabbing myself. Hey.
Do me. Wait.
So on my screen it rolled AD four and three D6.
Correct. I believe that is correct.
Let me let me go back to the tiger, though, because I
remember it being pretty. Those D sixes would be a damage.
The damage for this dagger is a 1D four.
Yeah, because on the screen here you got your Pierce damage as a
three and then next to it you got an 8 as a attack.
Damage to those D sixes was probably your sneak attack.
Oh. Yeah, Sneak attack.
Well, she's definitely not sneaking.
We are eye to eye right now. Well, kind of.
She's a lot shorter than I am. Who are you fighting again?
Ash, she's standing right here. Got it.
But you so you would also you'd get or sneak attack 'cause
you're within 5, even an ally, right?
Cat and Ash ganging up on Jesse. Hold on it.
I think so. Depends on what side they're on.
Yeah, on the. Side of the.
Chicken. So yeah.
OK, so I would take an additional aid damage from that.
Great. I love it. 11 damage.
Ash All right, Jess, what do you what is your character going
through right now, watching your own creations stab you to death
for attempting to? So in my mind, I would be
incredibly frustrated. Like I fucking made these
bitches. How dare they stab me?
I thought you guys were cool. And probably because I'm getting
hurt and I just keep getting angrier because that's my
natural reaction. It's like, oh, you hurt me and I
just kind of get like pissed off bang, that didn't come true.
Good. Anything.
Else, Sir Ash. Yeah, she's actually going to
look at Kat and give him bardic inspiration and been like, you
take this dumb bitch down, you fiery cock inspiration.
All right, that is it for her turn.
All right. Olivia and Franklin on deck.
Yeah, yeah. OK.
So, so Mommy's been over here just sort of like watching,
right? Like not really invested in
what's happening. Mommy's not from this world.
Oh, things are alive. I don't know.
I haven't gotten really to use my axes yet.
So this is kind of, unless watching Franklin cause chaos,
just kind of like watching out for Franklin.
But when mommy sees Franklin, you know, hurting me May, right?
Because Franklin's like, damaging me May in this process,
that changes, right? Because, like, me, May and mom
May are or they're not. Like, they're not on bad terms.
They're in pretty good terms, right.
And so me May's going to walk over here.
So this is kind of like, OK, Franklin, Like, I've been
watching, You know, it's kind of like when you're babysitting a
younger person and they start to fuck up and, you know, like,
gosh, like, seriously, right, Like everything was fine.
You had to go do that, ruin our good time.
Forever. So mom, my internet's being
weird tonight is going to use intimidating presence and scare
Franklin depending on their wisdom saving throw.
I just imagine you got one hand on your hip, you're tapping a
foot, you're just waving a finger at him.
Yeah, just like giving him a stare.
Yeah. Not happy.
All right, so you're trying to frighten me.
Yeah. All right, I don't even have to
roll. I have immunity to being
frightened. Damn.
As you do this, Franklin just kind of looks over at you, his
eyes completely black, one of his bugs still kind of
whispering directly into one of his ears.
And he turns to you. And then you see, just for a
flash, his own skeleton outlined against what appears to be a
mass of swarming insects that kind of, like, move out of the
way, he says. You don't scare me anymore,
Bobby, but I get your point. OK, so then I have a question.
For you DM. So mommy's big and strong and
mommy can grapple. But what I would actually like
to do is like pick Franklin up and try to Chuck him to get him
away just over that. Broke him, bro.
Throw your. Problem up.
And down. Yeah, I would like pick him up
with both hands over my head and like Chuck.
Him as fuck. Because I just want to like get
him away from me May right? Yeah.
Is tell me though is what is intimidating presence.
Like was that an action? No.
That's oh. This is action type 1 action.
Yeah, so it would be an action to attempt to grapple and throw.
Yeah, OK. I do have two weapon fighting.
That only counts if when you make an attack action, you can
use a bonus action to attack again, but you used your action
to use an ability. Gotcha.
He would have been. Frightened.
Yeah, fair enough, if intimidating.
Presence would have worked. Franklin would have had to move
right they? Can't wear.
Yeah, that was my again. OK, so I'm going to rage as my
bonus action, then. I'd like to rage.
I'd like to rage, please. At first you were disappointed.
No, you're mad, Angie. You won't like me when I'm
angry. All right, so since that didn't
work and I can't do. It you are also united your
other. Character is.
United does. That mean because Vamira just
united you? That's correct.
You have your full range of motion and action.
I like. I'm also going to move closer.
Cool. So do we know if there are
things that do not damage Franklin?
Oh, I forget mean looks? Undead.
He is, yeah, and I would assume me may would know this by this
point considering his decrepit looking state.
Yep. We also did have the CR
discussion last week because you were looking at Destroy Undead.
Yeah. Oh, I forgot that's I
characterize that. But so does it benefit us at all
to make Franklin alive again? Oh no, it still has to been its
turn trying to get as far. OK, So then this might be a bad
idea. Has Franklin taken any damage so
far? No, he's been shot at, but
everybody is missed so far. Additionally metally wise weed
determined, and you can take this as far as you want for your
actual role-playing, but that healing does hurt undead and
that would be kind of common knowledge.
I would, I would guess at this point.
What does hurt on death? Healing.
Healing magic. Oh, what about, like, genuine
compliments? Would that also hurt them?
I mean. So if I attack or try to heal
Franklin, those both do damage. Yeah, I would probably add some
sort of save for him if he if you're attempting to heal him
like a regular spell. Yeah, but you wouldn't just be.
Able to walk up in fair wounds and then auto hat, yeah, yeah.
Gotcha. Because last time when we talked
about the CRI think Franklin's CR is like at five or something
because it's based on his his experience points or something.
And if he's level 8 like the rest of us, he's.
Too. Strong for me to use destroy on
dead on. Yes.
OK, so I'm going to use Turn Undead on Franklin.
Turn undead and then action. You present your holy symbol.
Speak to prayer. Each creature makes a Wisdom
save and through if the scripture fails, is turned
eternity feature Spends as far away as you can.
OK, Wisdom save. What's your DC now?
I get that spell. I thought it was always trying
to. Huh.
Where do I find my DC? Your spells should be at.
The. Top Yeah, your spell save DC.
It would just be at the. Top oh fifteen?
Yeah, he has a + 8 to his wisdom saves.
Oh man. Oh, my little like DCC thing.
Button doesn't pop up. What is mommy's holy symbol?
I don't think we've ever determined something like that
+8. So 7 plus 7/14/15 people roll
A-15 beats it. Beats it.
Meats. It beats it.
That smells like that. Sounds like a commercial slogan.
Well, actually hold on. I need to make one more save.
Let me see. I'm going to do this one at a +
4 natural 20, OK? You see the small creature.
You see the small creature sitting on his shoulder,
whispering into his ear. Look over at you as well.
Shake his head, turn back and continue whispering.
Oh. Shit.
No bugs. Well.
Anything else? I think Olivia's still got to
go. Yeah.
And I'm also going to move so. I do want.
To. OK, so this is the bomb, right?
Yeah. So theoretically, we don't want
the bomb going off. No.
Ideally, yeah. Based on the information you've
gathered before were it to go off, it sets off a very large
area of effect explosion that when killing everyone, then
draws their souls back into it. For some reason, like as as I
look up, you know, at the storm, it appears that I can see souls.
Souls are are swirling around me because because remember, I'm
all the way back here. I have not approached the
clusterfuck. Yeah, I mean the center, the
center of the storm is like this whole screen.
Yeah. It's like.
The. Picture might be bright and
sunny, but it's not bright and sunny.
It's. Uneasily brightness down here.
I'm going to cast Magic Missile at 4th level so I get one more
dart for each slot above first, so it gives ME3 +3.
I get 6. Is that right?
Yes. Oh, that's annoying.
So that's so it does it always hit?
Yes. Is that a hit?
OK so so I have 6. Targeting who?
I'm definitely. So that's the range of 120.
So two of them I'm going to have target this bomb.
Two of them I'm going to have target Franklin.
What? Actually, I'm just going to have
to retarget the bomb and retarget Franklin.
This is. The.
Near all over. Again, we're going to die, guys.
Good, like a. Concession.
You're all beautiful and I love you.
Goodbye. We're on reality number 69,
right? It's fine.
Hey, where? Where's the pocket rocket,
somebody? 'S pocket.
He has got it, picked it up. Who?
Oh. Yeah, because we've never used.
It, huh? I just like them carrying it.
Yeah, you guys picked it up and then somebody went into it.
And then I assume the person who picked it up still had it.
Someone went into it, got swarmed with bugs, and does not
want to go back in. Oh, that's right.
Magic carp. Magic carp.
What Magic carp carp. Carp.
Full of them.
Car, Car, Car, Car, Car. So let's see.
You're gonna roll the rest of your damage.
Three at me and three at the bomb.
Oh, I. Roll there's.
There's six individual. There's six individual D fours
plus like whatever you add on to it.
So I already. Rolled one, so I need to roll
five more. Yeah, each dart is 1 D 4 + 1.
So yeah, just add 6 at the end of your total. 64 plus so 16 +
521 + 223 / 2 I guess. No, Why would you divide by two?
Oh yeah, For each one, Yeah. Yes.
So 11 and 12 damage as as you release your six Magic missiles,
they spread out from you like like homing pigeons.
Homing pigeons like homing devices and streak streak in two
paths 3 hitting the bomb that's sucking in souls and three
hitting Franklin. The three that hit Franklin,
each of them hit him in the side of the head, and as he's hit, a
number of bugs that create that or his flesh are shot off and
half of his skull is now exposed with a deep fiery glow inside.
So he's going to take the 12 damage and then 11 damage to the
bomb. What?
There's no motorcycle nearby yet.
The the bomb though, when it takes the damage it actually it
doesn't seem to actually damage the bomb itself.
It seems to be soaking up into it as if it's energy, just like
the life force that feeds it, and it begins now pulsing red.
Oh. Shit.
OK, that's it for me. My turn.
All right, so then we have Franklin and then Brianna coming
up. So Franklin, at the beginning of
his turn you see the flesh that is gone from the side of his
skull begins reforming as the swarm kind of runs or like fills
in the space as he automatically gains 1D6 of healing.
However, because of one of his features, he gets Max healing
while his chain familiar is around him, so he gets six
points of healing as he slowly begins healing in front of your
eyes. He then turns to Mame, right?
It's Mame, not Mame. Yeah.
And he will.
He will, as a bonus action, transform and manifest into a
form of dread as the form in front of you bloats and
grotesques ways. A chain appears, wrapped around
his throat with a collar. His skin appears decrepit and
decayed, bones poking out of as though he were starved.
He appears to be now a demonic corpse, chains whipping about
him wildly, so he will now reach out to make an attack on Mame.
Oh, also he gains say that once more like the the.
Person I'm paying the person I'm paying that.
Like, that's where that's happening.
One second. I accidentally unloaded my
screen. All right, Ping one more time.
Yeah. So where did where did Mimi go?
Mimi ran away. OK, Can't.
See me God? Damn it.
Oh, all right. Well, in that case he will, I
guess, start his turn. By God, you're still hidden, but
you're no longer hiding behind someone, so I don't know how to
run that. All right, well, I guess he'll
he'll then just move on to to Calhoun as he turns to Mame and
he says there she read away. Are you happy now?
And then he turns to Calhoun and makes the same attack.
Or makes the same thing he makes a he.
Becomes a form of dread. Calamum.
Yeah, Calamum. Yeah, he will still take his
Form of Dread, so he'll gain 1D10 temporary HP or Cal +3.
So I will gain 7/8 a temporary XP.
Then when I I will make a attack on Cal using the Vampiric touch
that I've already got running. So 12 plus 12 + 820 to hit Cal.
That hits. OK.
So with that you will take 46 of necrotic damage, which I think
it's turned up by 1 to 5D6 because I'm an undead warlock.
You take 14 points of necrotic damage as the life force is
drained from Calhoun and pulled through Franklin and into the
device. So, big question.
This I I apologize, real real question right here.
Cal is only level 4. Should he be leveling up for
this whole thing or is it like, 'cause I know we we did level 8
before for for our characters or for ourselves, I guess is a
better word. I had everyone come in at their
original level but I will take what are you What would you guys
like? I think I mean for the for the
whole thing. Yeah.
What would you guys like realistically I think for the
whole thing it it would make it would make sense considering the
circumstances that Cal you're you're kind of just starting
off. You were only ever in the
Infinite Tower for the most part, other than being in the
Pocket Rocket and now here, which I don't know exactly how
you got from A to B in this particular instance now.
So. But we'll we'll say it's no
longer than it took the the time from the same time that you
would have gone you know this last couple months, last couple
sessions which probably just for rough figures we're looking at
about four to 5000 XP from after the tower or or so.
I say I'm, I'm, I'm totally OK. I thought, I thought the Tower
got him up to level 4 because he came in, it was going on, and
then tower got him up to level 4.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. After the tower though, is that.
I've spent since then. Yeah, estimated experience.
So to say. No, I'm, I'm, I'm totally OK
with Cal staying at level four with his 36 hit points.
That's totally fine with me. Like, I'm I'm OK with that.
I just want to make sure it wasn't something that was like
fell through the cracks, you know what I mean?
Right. No, I gotcha.
No. So originally when I did this, I
was having everyone, their characters come in at their
current level. So I guess we'll keep it at
level 4 for now. Let's, let's do it.
That's fine. You, you.
It's not going to go. You said you said 4D6 and I
thought you said 46 and I was like, oh, he's dead.
No. So you took 14 points of
necrotic damage here. That's that.
That's totally fine. And I'm still restrained and
capacitated, yes. Correct got.
It. So that how will have been
Franklin's turn. And then Brianna is up and Flint
on deck. Oh, oh.
Oh, no. All right.
All right, all right.
What? She said.
All. All all.
Right. So where is it?
What the what? Johnny.
Johnny, I swear to God, if you start with the fucking quacks
and the fucking noises, I will. Lose my shit.
I forgot about the fucking sound board.
You know you missed it. OK, maybe slightly.
Maybe slightly. I I I did miss having you a part
of the a part of the crew. I'm not gonna lie, all right,
But I do think I have lost Idrell.
I know where Vilmyra and myself are.
Idrell. Idrell.
I don't know where he is. Is the SIM right here?
That's Ash. That's Ash.
Oh, where's Idrill? Yeah, there's all this combat
happening and we're just having like a three-way shootout right
here for the Golf Club. I don't know is.
Idrill Ever. Oh, there.
There he is. Yeah.
Right in, Right there. Yeah, he's over here.
Yeah, I found him. He's next to the bouncy house.
So Kaliman and whoever this is are still tied up, correct?
Yep. Yeah.
Zanora and Kaladrin are still. Oh, Zanora.
OK. I wasn't.
I wasn't sure who this was. I knew I knew the other one.
Was my little my little. Baby Monk free her.
Oh shit, she's OK. So we got a monk and a fighter
that are tied up. And you're still sneaking.
Somehow, Franklin hasn't noticed you right in front of his nose.
He pants him. Franklin Franklin did fuck up
some shit and he's like right in front of me right now.
Well, not me, but he's in front of Elmira, so.
Hey, wait a second. Where's?
I think from Maya is just going to go into.
I think she's going to go into attack action against Franklin.
Yeah, I think she has. So she has hex, so she's going
to cast hex on Franklin. And then?
Which attacker or which ability are you targeting?
So I pretty much only operate with daggers for Valmira.
So it. I.
Think she's essentially in melee.
She's she's going to have to do Melee.
No, hex is, I believe imposes disadvantage.
Let me check. No.
Hex is hex, one ability hex does.
Sorry, Hex does an extra D6 damage when I when I when I hit.
Yeah, and then the next part of the text is also choose one
ability. When you cast the spell, the
target has disadvantage on ability checks made with that
chosen ability. Oh, I've been slacking with hex
then. I mean, never mind.
Gosh. How did you how did you not read
the rest of my spell that I should know?
How could you not keep me accountable?
Is the drugs. Slacking as Adm?
Just kidding. OK, so wait, so I do an extra D6
and then they have disadvantaging on ability
checks. So Franklin ability checks.
So would Balmyra have any insight on the ability checks?
You're in the evil Balmyra's in the evil campaign, right?
Yeah, Yeah. Then you would.
Absolutely have a general idea. That that's why I'm asking the
question, because Wilmar is in the Evil campaign, so she should
know Franklin. But.
I. Personally, don't remember.
So let's see. He's got an excellent Wisdom,
OK, Charisma and Constitution. Meh.
Dexon Intelligence and no Strength.
Just keep in mind it is ability checks, not saves, so it won't
have anything to do with saving throws.
Good point, good point. Thank you, Barrett.
So ability checks? Oh, that makes it hard 'cause it
would like. I mean, I guess I'll just do.
Charisma was his highest, so I'll just do that.
Wisdom is. To like, try to give him some
sort of. Wisdom is the highest.
Wisdom. Wisdom.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll do what I'll do wisdom just
to attempt to try to, like, hold him back from easy scores or
something. Shoot him in the foot so.
To speak. Yeah, kind of attempt that and
then I will just since I'm in melee range, I'll just go in
with the daggers on Franklin. Dab me.
So I will go in with the first dagger 22 to hit.
Absolutely going to hit. OK, so quick question, does
mommy count as as someone that would give me sneak attack
damage? Because sneak attack I think is
if I if I have it. If I have an ally within 5 feet
of an enemy that I attack, I get sneak attack damage.
I don't know. I think that's a question for
Mommy. Mommy, you see this?
Happen. Yeah.
Do you consider yourself an ally of this person now, Shanking
Franklin? I mean, I would like to see
Franklin get some damage. So you kind of like thumbs up
over Franklin's shoulder? He's.
Emotionally damaged enough. All right, so in that case it
would be 17 damage with the daggers.
But then he's hexed, so I do an extra D6 damage naturally.
Naturally. Oh.
Son of a bitch at. Least it makes it even 18.
That's OK. That's OK.
I have.
I have another attack. Oh my God.
Johnny. Coming in.
Coming in with the sound effects.
He did it again. I missed.
I missed you, man.
Right work's killing me, yo. It sucks.
I hate it. That is unfortunate.
So I believe I have an ability that gives me a second action.
Yeah, I. Actually 02 weapon fighting.
Attack, attack, attack. Yeah, 'cause I I have two
weapon. I have two weapon fighting.
I don't know. I know from like a distance and
like Melee's like throwing me off right now.
I'm not used to being in melee so 2 weapon attack so I'll go in
with the second dagger. Oh sorry, I did the damage 1st
and not the so 14 to hit if I hit potentially 19 damage for
sneak attack. 14 will not hit. Well, not.
OK, so then. 19. OK, so then no, no damage and
then after my two attacks? So you that was your action and
bonus action, correct? Yeah.
So. Yeah, that's what I'm debating.
I'm debating if I want to move away and take a potential
opportunity attack. Oh yeah, no, I think.
I think Ron Mayer's just going to stand there and just like
glare daggers into Franklin. So then I'm going to move to
Idrell. He is bouncy house.
He wants civilization, civilization to die.
So this is Justin, correct? Who?
Is being currently held. Yeah, he's paralyzed right now.
So all Malay attacks have advantage.
And Justin has only been making attacks against Franklin,
Correct. He just tried to shoot him in
the hand. Oh, no.
All right. Well, in that case, Israel is
going to take two a few steps out and just get like a direct
shot on him and is going to release some arrows.
Oh my dear. Because the Echo.
Anyone. Fuck anyone who wants to
preserve. No advantage.
Society no only melee attacks or no melee attacks are autocrits.
What do you? Guys, do wait, hang on.
So what about paralyze? Is it?
Capacitated. Can't move or speak the decks.
The fails Strength and dexterity saving throws automatically.
Attack rolls against the attack rolls against the creature have
advantage. Any attack that hits the
creature is a critical hit if the attacker is within 5 feet so
you have advantage, but if it was a melee it would be an auto
crit if you hit OK. So since I'm ranged I just get
an advantage to hit. Yes you do get advantage.
OK, so I'm going to roll with my Longbow.
So 1/2. So does a 27 hit.
I think so. No, I don't think that.
Hits. No, I mean.
Definitely not. Absolutely not.
How much would you be pooping yourself if he said Nah.
Oh, so does that mean that he has 11 piercings plus four?
No. Colossal.
What is what is colossal? Slayer.
He likes to kill big things. I think it's like if you hit
something that's large once per turn, so hold on.
So what it is, is once per turn when you hit a creature with 11
attack, the creature takes a 1D8 damage.
If it's below HP maximum, oh then yeah, he probably would
take more damage. I would assume he's been hit
before. Whomp.
Whomp.
Where's the sound? So basically he gets hit for 11
+ 4, so he gets hit for 15 damage.
Come, Angel. How are you looking?
43 out of 59. Oh, OK, you're fine.
For now, still held. For now.
Well, when you take damage. You.
I forgot Angel Hunter's Mark. No, not against hold person.
Not when you take damage, damn it.
So I won't be able to do damage now, but I will cast honored
Mark who's done. Who's done the most damage
against Franklin recently? Has it been?
Has it been Justin or has it been?
I. Think it's a mix of Omire and
Justin? I have 0.
Points Oh no. Who did the magic missile?
Oh, maybe it was Mama. You can get Mama.
Oh, no. Sorry, Sorry.
That was. I guess the question is, is my
bad. Well, can Can Idrel see Mamae
through the trees? It's not Mamae.
So it was Olivia. I was wrong.
Oh, Olivia. So can Idrel see Olivia through
the trees? Where is Idrel?
Like opposite of the bouncy house.
And you're right there, right? Yeah, 'cause I I've been doing,
since I haven't done Franklin as well.
Yeah, I'm like trying. So.
Honestly, I don't know 'cause Romyra also just recently
attacked Franklin. Fuck.
Omira's definitely the most threatening here, being directly
next to him. Yeah, I think Idrel like, I
don't know, I I forgot. I forgot he had.
I forgot he had Hunter's marks. So since he's doing it after the
fact, he probably would Hunter's mark for Myra.
Honestly. Because he wants to protect
Franklin. Yeah, I'm gonna Hunter's mark
myself, all right. And then so I moved 10 feet and
then so I have Angel's gonna move another like 20 over here.
That's gonna be his turn. So myself, I am concerned that
Justin is held. So did so I I did I see who who
cast hold? Who casted help hold person on
Justin. Was I able to do that?
If you have general line of sight, I would say it's not a
secret. Someone's holding out their
hands, shouting magic words and. OK, so then I'm going to move
here and then I'm going to what do I have, what do I have in my
arsenal for spells? Because I know, I know.
I'm close to being like spent. Well, I think everybody re re
upped. 2-3 bubbles? No, but I I only re up on a long
rest, not a short no. We we absorb the magic,
remember? Yeah, in this reality you have
to destroy magical items to absorb spell spots.
I'll I'll be. Yep, you put some.
But I only get but doesn't that? But doesn't that only give you
like two or something? No, I think, I think I already
did that 'cause it only gave you like one or two spells or
something. It was.
It was 8 spell level. Slots.
Things. Yes. 8 spell levels for one
item, or if you destroyed one item and did an AOE.
Everyone in the AOE got two spell levels.
OK, 'cause I I I definitely shoved one of those things on my
butt. You got 8 spell levels.
But I thought, I thought I already.
Thought spells, then? I thought I had already
accounted for it. You may have because the spells
you may have restored may have been higher levels.
So you only restored a few of them.
Yeah. That's what that's what I I feel
like I was on top of my my stuff earlier and like I don't yeah, I
don't wanna. I mean I I have spells I have
spells to. So what I'm gonna do is just
that since Phelan was the one and I want to make her suffer.
Oh, can I retract my eye? And I want to.
I want to break her concentration.
Good luck. I'm going to cast magic Missile
at 4th level on Phelan to ensure that she has to make a
concentration save on the whole person.
I mean, you do damage one time and you have to do it, but.
Yeah. So you would end up making.
It, yeah. Well, I was I was getting
chromatic orb. But if I have to like roll to
hit and I miss like that's not going to be her AC is not very
high. She's a sorcerer, that is, It
doesn't like, it doesn't matter. It's like just like.
How? Like how?
How my how my brain works, like I am gonna absolutely make sure
that this concentration spell is broken.
Hey but question does magic missile it's different darts
each instance. Yeah, you have to make it
multiple times. OK.
So OK. OK, so magic.
Mystical Miss. Goal.
Miss Goal. Miss Goal Shut.
The fuck up. I like my Miss Goals too.
You know what? Meniscuses are beautiful, Choo.
Choo. So I know I had issues with
magic missile with D&D. So you said fourth level, right?
So that yeah, fourth level, which means so I get 3 initially
and then I get an additional 3. No, just roll 6 and then add six
at the end of it. I'm gonna roll it within roll
20. Don't do it with the trap.
Do you want me to roll it? Do you want me to roll it
within? If you do it in DDBN, it'll
still show up. Just do it on like the side of
the custom roller and do 6D four and then we'll just add 6 onto
where where's the custom roll in Dean DBN, bottom left there's a
dice. If you click on that, it shows
you all the bottom right. And for me it was on oh oh oh I
see it, sorry. It's like, yeah, if you click on
it, you can click on the D4 multiple times.
I was like, where is it? And I'm like it's obnoxiously
apparent. Click on it, hold on, how do I
click on the D4 and it'll be like one and if you click on it
again it'll be 2/3. Give it the numbers. 50 and then
you see roll to everyone, 64 roll to everyone.
Yeah, just click that and then we will add 6 on the end of
that. So 15 + 6, No, it didn't come
through. That's interesting. 21 You might
not be. You might not have been going
back into features and traits whenever you're flipping.
Between your. Character sheets.
Yeah, I'm I've got so many character sheets, so on my end
it was 15, so 15 + 621, so 2121. So does that mean does that mean
that Fay one has to make? 6 contracts, yeah.
No. Is it?
Is it 6 or is it 6 or is it 4? Six because six starts.
Six starts. OK, all right, so make 6
concentration checks. Phalen, let's see what you're
mainly. Or do you do Constitution saving
throws? No, it should be so it should be
based on my my spells, right? So no, it's based on the damage.
On what? We take, yeah.
So it's ADC 10. Yeah, because.
Each dart didn't do like a. Bunch of.
Damage. It's Yeah, it's.
And it's Con saves. OK, six concentration checks.
Here we go. So she takes the damage no
matter what, but isn't her concentration save based on my
spell save DC? No.
So concentration saves are for when you take damage.
The concentration check is either A10 or half the damage
that you take, whichever one is higher because it's based off of
like the. Amount of damage?
I think so. If you took like 30 damage in a
hit and you have a concentration spell, your DC is a 15 to like
keep your concentration up. Oh interesting.
And so since these were individual little darts that
each do 1D4 plus one, my DC is a 10 to make.
OK, I always. I always thought concentration
checks were based on, like, the pastor and like, their spell DC
No, that's normally only if you're doing, like, saving
throws against a spell. Oh, OK, OK, I gotcha.
I gotcha. OK, so I've made two so far.
Here's 3. Here's 4 Oh man, I am hanging on
by a thread for some of these five.
Oh dear Lord sticks. Wow.
Are you fucking serious? Can you?
Can you at least miss one of them?
I'm not even. Joking.
I rolled A5 two different times and met the DCI.
Had to. I have a + 5 to Constitution
saving throws like I have to roll below.
You are a piece of shit failing if you want to feel better.
She's really hurting because she's a tiny little squishy
sorcerer. I I in in my whole person I just
grunt like. I'm honestly amazed.
I didn't think I was going to get that six.
That was really scary. Six in a row?
Jeez, the chances are, yeah. The chances?
Honestly. I am so fucking salty right now.
Phelan, I am so pissed at you, right?
Though. Why won't you let me hurt you?
I. Don't even next.
Next Christmas. Oh my God dude.
The rage I have inside of me is unreal.
My turn isn't over yet, so just chill for a second.
It's probably over. But let me just double check.
I don't have any bonus actions 'cause if I have bonus actions,
they are absolutely being used against you.
God damn it, I don't think I have anything that's absolutely
so fucking frustrating. I.
Can. I am.
Literally, I am. Literally, I'm I'm literally
raging without being a barbarian who can rage.
I am a wizard who is raging right now.
Fireball, motherfucker. I don't have.
Fireball Right now I am. No one has that.
I am so furious right now, but I am.
I am raging while Ioffer concerns for my well-being so
fair. Fair warning, I move 15 feet
out. I'm gonna move 15 feet back into
the trees for some cover. Oh God damn.
I'm so fucking frustrated. I'm so fucking frustrated right
now, Palin. You are the gate, Palin.
You are the bane of my existence right now.
All right, she's honored. But my turn, my turn is over.
It's all you guys. Sounds good.
I believe. That's you.
Oh, that's Flint. I believe that will be Flint and
then Josh on deck. Oh no.
OK, so everyone's got new token I've been trying to keep track
but I have. A You can also ask.
We'll point ourselves out, yeah, yeah, you can also like ping
anyone and be like, who's this? And we'll tell you.
You just have to trust that we're telling you the truth.
And to fill you in from the last situation, other than blowing my
face off, which I'd come into combat in the beginning there
because I fell down the hill and you just kind of reacted having
kept watch for Franklin is what I assumed, being that you were
standing on top of the bodies. You'd also taken a shot at
Justin and missed and taken a shot at at Barrett and hit so.
It hit a lot and it hurt. Justin here, Barrett here, and I
I moved back. Barrett's hidden right now,
right? So basically everyone on the
steps is trying to stop him. And in the trees, but you can't
really see the people. No, you know, Kat and Ash are
there to help. Yeah.
Phelan, who's directly in front of the bodies, is there on your
side. So they're coding people right
now too. Yeah, they're with you and
Franklin. Flint and Franklin.
Yeah. We had to like say, like whether
or not our people would be on Franklin's side for this.
Who's who's these guys? That's me, Jess.
Your wife. OK, Connie's wife.
Not Flint's wife. Flint doesn't have a wife.
Nope. Flint's wife is dead.
Not. Anymore, what are?
These little things are these here are.
These dead. Those are.
I would ignore them. I'm not.
Actually using them. They were going to be bugs, but.
We're already doing a lot of damage to ourselves.
We don't need any more I. Didn't say that.
Went with the with his blood rage going on right now.
Knows the story and the pain that me, John has put through.
Put him through and he wants to feel revenge.
Oh yeah, John and Matt. Have they arrived yet?
Not yet. That'll be at the start of the
next thing. Why did I?
Light up, I'm color coding people for based on their team
AKA. I squeak in distress.
Lynn is going to cast Eldrick Blast at Jess 16.
It hits. 5/8 I do 3 bolt. By a certain level, yeah, you
would. Yeah, I do 3B.
So you can hit them multiple times. 18. 18 hits. 7 and 22.
Damn 22 definitely hits. 9755. Wait, that's the damage?
Yeah 'cause I hit you with three bolts.
I'll son of a bitch. 512. I look terrible, guys.
All of us are like losing our minds.
Bad. So that's 21 damage from my LG
blast. Oh, high level warlocks.
I'm not a warlock. Oh fuck.
Even better. He's a butthole.
That's what he is. So with that Mystic Frenzy, here
it is when I cast a can trip 'cause I mean, yeah, Eldric
Blast is a can trip for me. I can then immediately attack
with a weapon. I'm very far away.
Since my my Flint doesn't have the the augmented bad news, I
have Hamilton's thing up here. No, he does.
I did go back and forth between that, but I decided on the point
that he would have. He would have Hamilton's rifle.
I'm not sure how the death occurred, but I know he would
have like been bequeathed the rifle one way or another.
I'm saying for like for my rolls, because it pops up here,
says Hamilton Rolled it. Ah, I see what you're saying.
Yeah, so 25 to hit. Against 2O me.
Yes. Yeah, that hits.
Oh, we're going to, we're going to lose.
Yes. Yeah, that's a keyboard.
Don't. Wait, OK, ignore the sneak
attack. Oh, Lee.
Fuck. Oh my God.
Ignore the 13 from the sneak attack that didn't happen.
Oh, just the 13. Just the 49, Oh.
My God. Wait, which one am I looking at?
So yeah, hold on, 'cause when I just rolled this like a fucking
shower of dice went out. I'm saying.
Augmented Black Bed News. So you should have had two D
twelves plus three and eight D 10.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
So that's the 18 and 49, yeah. That's that's They should have
hit fucking Josh earlier. Hey.
Oh yeah, that did take out Josh in like 1 bit.
Yeah. What do you mean this?
I don't like it. The last item. 48.
Somebody get that off of him. So it's the 18 and the. 67.
Goodbye, casual chuckle. On top of the 21 that those
Alger blasts. So, so I am dead in a puddle of
goo on the ground. Red Gooey goo.
Like dead. Dead.
No, you didn't. He left.
But what's your total did? It go into your negative.
My total was. Hold on.
What's your What's your Max HP? He was like 40504343 and you
were at she's. Dead.
Oh.
OK, while you figure that out, I'm gonna.
She's dead. Dead.
She was at 9:00. He did 60.
You did how much damage? It would hit No, my Max HP is 53
not 43. That's what I thought.
Oh, OK. OK, but what?
It was the But wait 49 + 9? I had 9. 49 + 18.
Plus 49 + 18, so that's 60 but. What's?
What? Did you have 21?
I had nine left. The 21 doesn't matter right now.
You had nine left on a Max of what, 53?
You're dead. Dead.
It's five over. It's five over the negative.
Is it It's. Five over.
You had 62 total hit points to take and he did 67.
Flint, why do you want to do this?
Oh, my, absolutely. It was just like.
No, I have a couple things that's about to happen here.
So after the eltric blast, like we're going full on dramatic,
one hits her in the shoulder, right shoulder, back, left
shoulder, back, one in the stomach.
And as she's holding her stomach, getting ready to look
up, she just sees Flint ready with the broadsider aiming right
at her. And you just see him whisper
something, but only she hears it.
This is for him. I flip you off.
Is she ain't? Going down without balance,
without. Violence as you turn into a red
mist. My my Crimson Focus of the
Undying gives me one D6 health back. 06.
No. And oh.
Are we? Losing.
Someone who did we lose? She's downstairs probably having
issues with the the connection. Who is?
Who's this right here? That's me.
You're trying to stop Franklin, correct?
He's paralyzed right now. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm held.
And yes, Franklin's a fucking douche.
OK, so as Jess dies, my blood curse of the fallen puppet.
Oh. Do the the.
How do you measure the distance? Yeah.
Oh, oh. Just in range so I can make you
attack creature within rain. I don't know what attacks Jess
has. I was.
Going to say if you're looking for a range attack, I dropped
the sniper rifle. I thought it.
Was and I have a Golf Club in my hands.
I would say if you're this is like a she's come back, she
comes back as like a zombie for like a second, right?
Or. It's it's I'm still the creature
with the final act of aggression.
Yeah, but they only. Have blood ghost.
They only have so you can first 'cause the Chris curvature to
move up to half their half its speed.
So half her speed if she can get to me is 15, so she can't get
she can't get to me technically based on this.
So OK, so you can get to here. What do you have to attack with?
I have a Golf Club and a baseball bat, and I do have
spells. Druid craft, mending, poison
spray, produce, flame. Why is this not scrolling?
It already knows you're dead, she said.
No more scrolling. Oh, you got produce flame?
Produce flame, invisibility. Pass without a straight, pass
without a trace. Daylight.
Haste. Freedom of movement.
Dream. Insect.
Plague. Oh God.
So can everyone see my? My.
Measurement things here. Yes.
OK, so I'm going to make you move here.
That's half your movement speed. Insect Plague has a range of 300
feet. How thematic and it.
Is Yeah, Insect Plague is a Little spell Itch of a spell,
dude. You will cast Insect Plague.
Yeah, let me throw it up. Where will Where will you focus
it on? Johnny's got no chill.
No. See this?
I see this happening, I say. Well, fuck.
More like. Pinged rate.
Sure. Is that an?
Is that an AOE? It is an AOE.
That's an AOE. It is a 20 foot.
It is a 20 foot sphere. Sure, but does his text of his
of Johnny's ability specify that she can?
Like, is it one attack? I'm just wondering if if she can
catch. It's like an AOE thing is an.
Attack. One weapon attack?
Never mind. Yeah, that's what I thought it
was you. Could go against that.
The only way you could go against that is if the argument
of potentially if they were War Caster, but I don't think she is
so. So in that case, who's this?
Who's who? Barrett again?
Nope, that's that's. Oh, free.
Not bad. OK, you're.
I'm over here. Oh.
OK. So Jess will move that 10.
Feet easy. Get all the squares.
That's stumbling 10 feet as all of my blood is leaving my body,
yes. And you will take a swing with
the the chicken wacker. Let's make it.
Uh, oh, the chicken wacker. Am I am I in danger now?
Yeah. Oh, shit.
Yeah. Yikes.
Did you did you hear about how
he murdered Jesse? Yeah.
You've been cutting in and out. I was.
I yeah. Sorry, I was like I was like
switching and like messing around my Bluetooth and stuff so
I. Had.
Completely missed. She had nine hit points left
with a total Max of 53 hit points and and Flint did 67
damage to one shot, which is five over the total health she
had left. Dead.
Dead, was it? Failing that, also met that same
fate. Wait, are we playing where you
would like roll for? Like, are we are we playing
where if you go negative it like counts against you?
Or are we playing where you just you don't negative your Max
total like hit points? You're like dead, no death saves
or anything, right? But is that what we're playing?
Yeah. Oh.
OK, I've never played. I've never played with negative
hit points before. It's kind of like a general rule
of like if you take so much damage that you're going
negative the total amount of health that you even just kind
of have, like, it's just kind of like, dude, there's no way, OK,
I've always, I've always just played where like if you hit
zero, then you just like roll for like you roll for death
saves. I've never played like if you go
beyond like negative something. I think we generally do.
It's just we we start minusing death saves if it's not over the
total, because no one's been damaged to that point over the
total of their like we've come close a couple times.
I did it once when I first introduced.
Phelan, that happened to me. Yeah.
God damn, little girls. All right, so question.
So I know that Chick Wacker hit hit Bree.
Wait, so how much did it hit me for?
OK, so 21 definitely hits. Well, hold on, four damage.
Wait, does it mean it? You were too far away.
I'm sure 21 hits. OK Yeah, 21 definitely hits SO44
damage. All right?
I just wanna mark it to make sure.
Four damage. Nice you.
Rolled backs. I'm so cool.
I'm so hurt. It's painful.
We're all really hurting, dude. I'm going to guess that I just
flop over dead next. To you after I.
Smack. You.
God, that's traumatic. I'm not.
Hey. You're You're what?
You. Please do what you think.
Please. Do what I'm thinking?
Please do what? I'm wait, wait, so who?
Who Who hit me with the chicken wacker?
Was it Jessie Jessie's dead body?
Jessie. OK.
And when I kill her, I can use my cursor, the fallen puppet,
and make her attack. Yeah.
OK. OK.
Gotcha, gotcha.
Got it. So I guess the question is, is,
is I guess the question is would I know that she's a puppet?
I think you you watched this happen.
Well, I was going to say you watched me got hurt and then I
first do I should I roll? Yeah.
Should I roll a perception or? Well, if you did, kind of.
Can you? That perception's not going to
matter. Oh God.
I think you would. I think you would have watched
her get her face blown in with the gun correctly under you.
Oh, right, because Slim has a gun and I forgot about that.
There's just a squishy mass standing over you with a Golf
Club. Has gun, gun.
Franklin's got a gun. You can see Jess like, like
slumping over to you. Oh, OK.
Wanting to come apart, but you can see her blood just.
Slowly, She's she's clear. She's yeah, she's clearly fucked
up. Yeah, her.
You can noticeably see her blood holding her limbs intact.
And after she. Makes gotcha after she makes
the. Swing and hits you.
Just a whole mist of red comes over you.
You're now wet. I miss.
Oh, I'm wet. I don't like being wet.
That's unfortunate. I I thought you were going to go
for the you once you blew a fine wrist.
The hand that was flipping you off that was also holding the
chicken whacker went flying up into the air and you just took
the the minimal amount of effort to direct it towards her and it
comes spiraling back down and just conks her over the head
still holding the fuck you of the fingers.
You know what I like it as? As all that happens, the hand
just falls down and just spins in a circle rolling around on
the floor. Middle finger bingle still in
the air. No, you know, I don't appreciate
being soaked in blood. No, don't recommend.
I don't think anybody does. Do not do not recommend.
And then with my with my second action, I will use my healing
hand on myself to heal for 9:00. I'll be right back.
Then it's viral. Oh.
Shit. OK.
Josh, you're on deck or you're up with?
Oh, Josh, what are you gonna do? Hamilton.
So he had to kill you? I.
Forgot the least amount of hit points other than Jess now.
Aren't you guys glad I joined at the last minute?
100% Johnny, I've been missing your presence.
Seriously. Chaos in form right here.
I would, I would preference my turn with sticking my head and
breathe and dripping. Probably sounding very nasally,
actually, I'd say in in Celestial towards Franklin,
actually. Why are you doing this?
Franklin will turn to you, and he'll kind of like scrunch his
face a little bit. BRB.
OK, and he kind of like he you see him visibly shake his head
as the little creature on his shoulder clamps more firmly onto
his ear and whispers into it as he turns back, not responding.
Even in Celestial. Which I I did take the time to
glance at my phone and the D&D Beyond app to make sure that he
knew. I rolled a check here and I got
an 8. Oh, what was it?
So it was a it was a Wisdom save against basically himself or
something. OK, I see.
And I think he's got disadvantage, right?
Because of the hex he does unability. 2 eights, so that's
still, that's no he's he has a + 8.
So yeah, he has a + 8, so it's still a 16.
So you do see him like shake his head and like his eyes kind of
like blink in and out of like darkness for a second as he
looks at you, he goes, what's going on?
And then, Oh no, his eyes go black again.
This is the thing which is kind of feeling sympathetic ear
again. I'm feeling sympathetic.
He's just a child. That was a free action on your
part. Yep.
Yeah. Yep.
That's what I was trying to get information wise out there,
considering my distance from everyone and everything and my
current amount of cover. And for some reason Olivia is
very far away still. So I'm actually going to, I
think we'd said the van was on this side if I recall correctly.
Let me draw the measuring tool over somewhere here like here.
That's where we parse open spaces, basically.
Yep. So I'm actually going to use all
of my movement to go back to the van and take the ring off of
Todd as my presumable action and staying as much to the trees,
you know and keeping the line of sight of that tree in between me
and people to get the ring that is to the pocket rocket off
Todd. But that's my action.
I would also like to do something else but I don't think
I have the range for it at this time.
So and I and I only have one more key point right now.
So I, I will I will pass the turn for now.
I got the the ring off Todd. OK.
You pull the ring off Todd successfully.
Now at the start of the turn, the camera kind of pans out and
we'll zoom over further and further and further, whipping
past directions and lands on Washington, DC.
Zooming in, zooming in on one of the FBI buildings there, you see
two individuals pop into existence next to a wall as the
former earth wizard formerly known as Matt and Johnny turn to
each other. I say, all right, so here's the
place. Pretty sure from what I saw,
there was like 3 guys inside. They're human.
So I don't expect too much. But if we can take these guys
out quickly, I think I've got a plan to help the others and I'll
pull out my phone and text you guys ETA 5 or ETA Like one
minute Josh point the pen at biggest target.
Point the pen at biggest target. OK, so Jonny had to go to the
restroom, so he's not at his ass right now.
Sorry. No, you're fine.
We'll finish. Once he gets back, we'll kind of
conclude this side thing here before switching back to you
guys. And our deaths?
All right. Yeah, it looks like we're not
doing so hot. Nope.
Yeah, I mean. Someone needs to take out.
Flint. He seems like the biggest
problem I've been trying to I've been so close.
I know I should have aimed for fucking Flint instead of the
chicken. I should have just ignored that
God damn chicken. I have a plan go.
Go. I like.
Plans. We need you back at your desk,
Sir. Stop flirting with your wife and
play this game. All right.
I'm back. Sorry.
So no worries. So what?
You for you, for you. What you have missed was that
the camera panned out and zoomed over to Washington DC onto a
nondescript FBI building where two individuals teleported into
existence right outside the door.
And me and you are there. And I whispered that just on the
other side of the door was what we were going for.
It should be relatively easy, there's only a couple people
there. And then I texted the group,
indicating that we may have something to help them in like a
minute or or a little while and two point, get the pen into the
position pointed at the biggest target.
So I turned to you, Johnny. And I say, all right, on the
count of three, we're going to bust in here and just take out
everyone you can. If you don't want to kill them,
that's fine too. But we you just can't let them
react. Ready.
Yeah, as as I'm holding the gun, shouldering it up, I'm like,
yeah, dude, I know this is real. Let's go.
Just fully embracing the mushroom.
Perfect. Oh, bro's like fully in the.
Delusion that he doesn't think any of this is real.
Oh. Yeah, I don't think any of this
is real. That's awesome.
So on the count of three, I will bust open the door using knock
and we rush in and we'll do this one kind of theatre them.
Well, there's a map here to the right hand side, but we'll just
do a real quick back and forth for this relatively small fight.
Right hand side like the lounge with the gong in it in the pool
table. Yes, OK.
That's the secret base of the organization that they got
drafted into. OK.
And so that would be you. And then this is me.
So as I burst in, I would immediately cast Hold person on
this person Indigo Shadow and use a divination portent to make
her fail. And then I'll point her out to.
You all right? That one's got to go 1st and
I'll take aim and take start taking shots.
Go ahead and make your attacks add advantage I poor portent.
What was it? Peating crossbow or just a
normal heavy crossbow? It's a heavy crossbow with 1D
with one dye extra damage. So just a normal heavy crossbow,
not heavy crossbow 1 not crossbow.
Nope, just a regular gun. OK, the fuck I put it in my
inventory. It looks like we're going to be
part 4, Part 5, so I take advantage because she is held.
Yep. Wow.
That's still fine. She's a wizard who hasn't cast
Mage Armor, so. So instead of the one D10, the
two D 10. I don't cry, falling asleep.
I'm sorry. 10 damage. 10 damage, OK, she gets shot looking at
almost completely down at this point.
And then do you have anything else that you need that you can
do, Johnny?
No, because I got the horde breaker, but no, it's only
within 5 feet. OK, then it'll be their turn.
Wait, attacks per turn? I got two attacks.
Sorry. Hey.
Hell yeah. So I'll take another shot at
that person. Yep, His advantage?
19 on. That one.
Tell me how you want to kill her.
There's random lady that just looks shocked by the door
bursting open, frozen in place. And then you take two shots that
are. Like, oh, I like this, oh this
is fun. And I just start popping around
better. I get one right in the chest.
I'm like, Nope, too low. Aim a little bit higher, just
get it right through the eyes. Next to you, I give you a side
eye. Like what did I start?
I'm I'm going to look over at you like the like the Pedro
meme. Just like yeah, yeah, Pedro.
Pascal, Pedro Pascal. Yes.
Yeah. Yeah.
Laughed nervously. So on their turn they will.
The artificer is going to cast a repeating acid Slinger so
something strapped to his arm. He pulls back and shoots it
forward with a + 5 to hit and I guess he will go probably for
the crazy guy with a gun. Understand that one.
That one's threatening. The 19 + 524 to hit.
Fuck yeah. Dealing 2D6 eight points damage
to you as you get a glob of acid hitting your arm, and it's
incredibly painful. Like, in your mind, all of this
is not real. But that pain that's that's real
pain. Or is it simulated pain?
But either way, it hurts a lot. Fuck.
Off. Ah, that's good.
Oh, that's good stuff. Oh, I'm gonna need some more of
the mushrooms after this. Oh, shit.
Gulp. Maybe Franklin wasn't the real
monster all along. Right, Samuel Jackson turns
around. He's like, what the hell?
And then he pulls out a rapier and lights it, and it turns into
a a shining blue or purple rapier.
As he runs forward, Wow. 40 stops, realizes he doesn't have
the range, and he pulls out a gun and he attempts to.
I guess he will also fire at you, 'cause you're.
Yeah, oops. That was AD 12, rolled A6.
So he pulls out a gun and just wildly shoots, missing you
entirely as he fumbles fumbles around.
He's like, what's going on? Too many Wizards in this fuck
plane. As he misses, I'm gonna look at
him like I don't remember asking you a God damn thing.
All right. And we'll swap that quickly to
my turn and I will cast a a fourth level magic missile.
No, a third level magic missile. So above second, second or
higher. So I get 5 total and I shoot all
of them at Sammy Ji, walk right up to him, and I fire him.
It takes the form of a gun as I just pull out a handgun and
shoot finger guns, finger guns. I like that.
So it'll be 64 to him, 14. He looks like he's literally on
death's door. As I as I fire, I walk slowly
forward and I say fuck the government, fuck the government,
fuck the government. And then it will be your turn.
Me. Yep.
So he's still alive. But barely.
And then the guy in the corner who shot you with acid.
So I'm going to move 10 feet right next to you.
I'm going to take aim on Sammy J, take a shot at him, 15 hit.
15 will hit, yeah. Let me make sure.
That, that's 17. That's 21, yeah. 21 Yeah, with a
21. How do you want to do this?
As we just burst in, start gunning people down.
Imagine after you hit him, he's like hunch over weeping like, oh
fuck, I got this, I got this. It has that look to him be like,
remember Deep Blue sea? Yeah, that motherfucker Shark
ate you, didn't it? Face He crumples, dead to the
ground. So confused, What shark?
Who's reaching out to the real Sammy Jay and trying to get him
on the show? Just kidding.
I mean, you're the ringleader, aren't you?
Yeah, come on. Yeah, we're, we're we're leaving
Sammy Jay in the desk. So you see the Artificer in the
corner, pulls out a small bomb, lights it and he says well I got
nothing left and he just tosses it or I got nothing left left to
lose and he just tosses it and a artificer launched small bomb
within 30 feet. Each creature within a 5 foot
radius of that point must make ADC 13 deck save or take 2D6
fire damage on a failed save, or half as much on its success, so
a deck save. 21. A7 for me.
So I'm going to fail. You're going to succeed.
As for damage, I take two points of damage and you take or I take
4 points of fire damage and you take two points of fire damage
as we as I get sand Gee my my robe shit.
That hurt like, ah shit. I've been on fire before.
That ain't too bad. I look to you what?
I've been through some shit, man.
OK. We need to hang out more.
Then on my turn I'm going to do another.
I'll do another hold person on this Jack or on this mechanic.
He will have a + 2 save against my DC of 14. 14 beats it, beats
it. And I say shit and I move and
hide by the table. I crouched down.
Shoot him. All right, your turn.
I take aim, Papa. 21 will hit, Yeah.
He has an AC of 16, Nine points of damage.
No, it's a Well, I've been rolling it that way because it's
because the crossbow is A1 D 10 + 4.
So I've been rolling the two D 10s manually, got it and adding
the four so it's 13. 13 points? Yeah, he he appears instantly
bloodied as you shoot him in the chest.
Fuck. On his turn, he lights another
bomb and tosses. Oh.
I have two attacks. No.
Oh, you have two attacks. Yeah, that's for.
That's right. Go for it.
As he's visually coughing up blood like, Oh yeah, you like
that one? I got another one for you.
Sorry. Hello 1515.
Yeah that that immediately kills him again.
How do you want to do that? I'm going to follow up the same
shot right through the chest and aim for the heart breakthrough
center rib cage. With one bullet shot, silence
falls in the room. There's fire kind of all around,
catching here and there. The corpses of three individuals
now litter the ground, and smoke fills the room.
I turn to you and I say that went wildly well.
Look at you. Look at you with that Pedro
face. That was fun, dude.
Now let's go catch my wife. Make sure she's OK.
Absolutely. I pull out a bag that see it
appears starry in nature and place it and kind of like open
the lid and I say let's dump everything we can in here and
then I turn to you. We've got a train to catch and I
think that is where we will end it here as Secret Invasion Part
2, Part 4, a 69 I guess runs until next week.
You know what? I'm on vacation next week, so
I'll be able to play. I will say, yeah, I will say
that Justin and I will not be able to play for the next three
weeks. It was a good time.
He's on everyone. I will see you in quite a few
weeks. All right, have one.
Good. Night.
Oh my God. A grand and wonderful thank you
for those who took the time and made it here to the end of the
episode where I know sometimes we are long winded and others we
are just dead silent. I don't know what to tell you,
this is raw here folks. Please remember to like and
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