Hello fair listener, welcome and thank you for following our
journey on Metagaming by Rum Propelled Gaming.
Fair warning, sometimes we are not safe for work and others not
safe for real life. Journey forth at your own risk.
Now let's dive right back into Tara through the campaign Mani
polos. Yes, my oh, praise Craig, my
Lord, I've converted them. We all.
Praise Craig. Now.
The hand the fate tosses, the dice rolls, spins, turns.
The campaign starts and ends, leaving memories that become
stories. Stories flow out into the
infinite sea, painting it with legends.
Legends wash up on the shores throughout the infinite sea,
fading to myth until myths are forgotten.
And again. The campaign that gave at birth
comes again and again, and a fate tosses the dice rolls,
spins, turns. Hitherto we left our adventurers
known as the Shadow Seekers on the 4th level of Hell.
Greed. After vanquishing the mere seal
on the 5th level of Hell of Manny Polis's prison in the
center of the phallic maze of the Acropolis, the Shadow
Seekers fell before the greedy Goblin Tavern swelter in
sweltering heat of the molten magma that filled the floor of
the enormous goblin settlement that they found themselves in.
Reluctantly, they pay the entrance fee to quench their
thirst on Green Goblin slushies. At the Green Greedy Goblin, Ash
bargains with Bildreth Bill. She later gets to know the
proprietor of the Greedy Goblin for a 50% share of the profits.
He also explains the Church of Kaishen is the only other free
time activity of worshipping for wealth.
More drinking ensues with the successful deal, whereupon
Steven the bartender explained they had been victims of greed
already. From the door goblins, Franklin
and Phelan drunkenly threatened the guards for Ash's gem back.
Gem and Bill let's Ash know they are welcome to stay in one of
their rooms and she's she's able to drink for free now that she's
50% owner. The Shadow Seekers wake with a
pounding in their heads and and a resin and resonating
throughout to the pocket rocket sitting at the table with
breakfast ready. Franklin has two young dire
crickets in new Goblin gulls driving their skeletons and
nobody bats an eye while they finish their breakfast and the
tink tink tink that was pounding slowly fades away in their heads
and in the pocket rocket as as the as they're prepared with
some CAF to to help with the headache.
Refreshed from breakfast, they head out on the ramshackled
goblin town straddling the magma pit.
Realizing Ash is rich, they decide to go on a shopping
spree, stopping at several shops, St. vendors and an Armory
shop with a large list where the Shadow Seekers used Sugar Mama
Ash's wealth of precious stones for some fancy new items.
During the haggling, the Shadow Seekers learned of the Wealth
Festival coming up soon. That would be next session, just
FYI, or is what I kind of penciled in here not not this
one, that's. Right where everybody gets
together in one place perfectly, as if asking to be blown up by,
I don't know, a massive order of dynamite.
As well as Ezra adopted Regina in the middle of the store with
Franklin officiating and plans were made to plant a healing
mango of youth inside the Pocket Rocket and explode the Goblin
town with the town's own stockpile of dynamite.
Nonetheless, the river of the Ring of mine shield the and the
rhinos hide are on were noted to be on back order, however, so
they decided not to blow up the town today.
Ash received the stone receipt for their dealings for them to
come back, and the goblin salesman explains how to get to
Kaishen's temple through a finely crafted large metal door
in the Cliff face. They check the time from the
glowing stalactites stalactite clock hanging over the town.
Realizing it is late in the afternoon, they proceed through
the door and out to the other side of a metal tunnel into a
new chamber where the temples stood directly in front of them.
That was in this room being much cooler than it was in the
previous or in the in this chamber.
And the Shadow Seekers walk up its staircase, into it, into it,
into the church with and are greeted by a flamboyantly pimp
preacher who walks directly up to them and asks them to swear
fealty to caution, which is simply the chant that they hear
all around them. Of more, always more wealth
flows to the worthy, and I am worthy.
Ash then contacted Manny Polis, who explained that he would take
just about any swearing Kaishen that is, and he then seizes the
opportunity to explain to the Shadow Seekers.
Michael Polis was not lying about the world of Tarth
exploding on his release and imploding on his death.
And if he is left in his prison, the world would stay in peace,
but the Shadow Seekers would be trapped in hell still.
And many pulses rambles on more in his drunken slur that it's
fine, he can fix the world after it explodes upon his release and
create it in their image as they are welcome gods at his table at
that point. But they should steal the world
seed from Michael Polis to help rebuild, rebuild Tara.
At which point blood was pouring from Ash and Franklin's noses
with the connection to the God and these plans that kind of
went above everyone's head and Regina's eyes went a little
bloodshot. While KIRO.
No, Ezra, we're in Ezra. Ezra kind of just looked at
everybody confused and then Ash pets Bob the crocodile
soothingly, after which they all begin to swear fealty to Kai
Shen, only half hearted, but still seems to take all except
Franklin goes smoothly to repeat the chanting around them.
Franklin learns too late that the stitch and and this that his
connection to his Lord and Saviour was withholding him from
being able to promise himself truly to the Lord of Kaishen.
And the statue out front squishes one of Franklin's
companions as it tries to escape from the temple.
And the door swing shut. And a voice from below rumbles
out that they shall die for Franklin not relinquishing
releasing his vow to another. And yeah, you guys can all roll
initiative. We're in danger plus zero, but I
have advantage. I have 10. 19. 17.
Then again, Ezra was wolfing out kind of protecting dad mode, so.
Yeah, don't forget you guys are under the effect of ceremony for
the next week 5E. I'm looking it up for you.
So that was a 10 for yourself, Ezra.
Yes, just. Making sure before I press the
button. Oh boy.
You both have a +2 to AC with that while you're within 30 feet
of each other for the next week. Oh, they all go first.
Yeah, I oughta rolled that. Oh no.
There's so many of them too. We're in danger.
This is going to be Ako turn one.
We don't even get to go. All right, that's fine, no
problem. The large most of the goblins at
this point are eyes bulging out of their head, kind of frozen in
a panic, don't seem to unable to move.
It seems like as one of the guard guardians, you, you're
interpreting the sense of them of the church comes stalking
forward at 10:20. All right, 30.
Just make sure right up to Franklin, who seems to be the
offending person in the first place.
OK. Hi, I'm Franklin.
And it opens its ma. Let me see here.
That's an interesting conventional official
immediately after. Oh, OK.
Die. Just oh, I'm not going to really
die. We're all already dead.
Being that this creature is on fire, it does not seem to care
about fire and it brings up its hand with a ball forming in it
after it's already moved forward towards you of.
Course. And yeah.
You can see as it's gotten closer though, bits and pieces
of gears and such that are all over it that are some mostly
formed. Some of the joints aren't quite
formed and it casts. Airball.
With yeah, it opens its mouth basically and you just hear
this. Airball excellent fuck.
Creek 20 foot. So yeah, it's it's definitely
centered on you guys. You guys are all going to have
to make a dexterity savings throw for me.
I believe it is Yep, Yep, Yep, Yep.
All right, here we go. Go.
Seat belt that was perfect. Was.
I don't know what that was, but. Fasten your seat belt.
This is gonna suck. Oh I just rolled a natural 20.
Plus 320. Three reroll.
Oh God. Inspiration.
Oh wait, everybody's near me, right?
You get a + 3 to your saving throws.
Not helpful. May I use an inspiration point
to reroll? I don't know.
Let me say see a second. Well, there's only you know.
If I blame the book. Of 22 and it is in a.
Level 2. Level 2.
This is just one of the the three guys here.
Yeah, I think we're done, Z. My drawing there it is rectangle
arch. Yeah, I want.
Oh, that's what that's. Boy, they're their role on
initiative was very high. Yeah.
Through the plan, the plan just got.
Grilled look to you. The other is.
A 10 foot bye. Gosh wait, does it hit the other
goblins that are within 20 feet though?
Yeah, that's what I was trying to figure out here.
Fuck yeah, at least kill yourself and it hits the guy.
Yeah, I think so 'cause it's centered, right, Right in the
center of you guys. So 5/10/15 20 Yeah, well.
Don't do it guys. Everyone online don't commit
suicide like this guy committing suicide with a fireball on.
Himself don't do it for him that doesn't.
You can see the flames start to erupt as it starts to explode.
The ball of fire that seems to have compressed and gone into
the center of you guys does not seem to affect it at all.
It is pretty much already it's it's already molten almost.
So this this amount of fire is just kind of like a warm breath
of air. Yeah, yeah.
But the the people out outside of that.
Was this thing a like a a creature too way up north?
Yeah, yeah. We'll see.
Unfortunately, rage will not do anything for this unfortunate.
Oh no. I'm not a particular subclass of
Barbarian yet. You're not a particular subclass
of anything, you're a level 2. I know.
Oh, I need, I need one more. There we go.
Yeah, the the pin just saves so it only takes half damage at 11,
but all the other goblins are just incinerated.
Hooray. As you look around and where did
it go? Now anyone that beats a 6A16, if
you beat it then you you you take half of the 22.
Otherwise you take the full 22. Yep.
Yep, Yep, Yep. Yep, Yep.
Yep, Yep, Yep. Also, the other guy's turn.
No, as the dust settles from the spell almost as if like you hear
a rumbling inside the creature and you see a kind of a charge
wreck all over its unfinished joints and and a clap like
Thunder as a wave rolls out from under under it.
It looks like you're not quite sure where for another 11 damage
it looks like is what I rolled. 2D10.
Yep, with ADC constitution saving throw Constitution.
Yeah, if you could make that. 17.
Just made it buddy. 16. Yeah, made by the Xian and a six
from Regina. That would be 11.
Oh wait, I did a. Check not saving.
Oops. Oh.
No worries. Sorry.
OK. Oh, I did worse.
I got a 2. Yeah, as you, yeah, as you're
sitting on Ezra's shoulder, I think was said before.
You're you're you're probably knocked back like your legs are
still on his shoulder probably, but you just feel like your ears
kind of are wet now and you're you're losing your balance.
But I'm assuming he's holding on to you still.
But you guys? Oh yeah.
Avoided the the blow.
Looks like you turned your yourselves just slightly sideway
in that blast from the creature. Kind of the resulting blast
after its attack. So did we take damage then?
Yeah, an additional 11 for yourself.
Gotcha. The others did not.
Just trying to figure out how to flavor all that.
Oh yeah, Look at that, Regina. All right, OK, so then it's the
next one's turn and from it's spot steps down from the
actually it walks straight through the molten metal that
it's standing in already down the through, down into even
hotter metal dripping with it and makes.
Metal foot or melt molten footprints in the stone walking
towards you and just steps on each one of these goblins,
killing it in turn with their screams echoing through the
chamber. Wow, these guys do not care.
And raises his hand and you hear it making the same like weird
vibrating noise from its throat again and you see another
fireball for me in its hand. Jesus.
Jesus takes the wheel. If you can make another
Dexterity saving throw, I'd appreciate it.
Take it from my hat, dog. Jesus taking the wheel.
Could you ask him to roll your Dexterity saving throw for me?
17 I almost got a natty 2022. Well.
I'm still going down boys, but I'm I'm using my body as a
shield for Regina. I think I'm fucked.
Oh yeah, that was 37 this time, so half of that would be math or
F33. So 30, 18 was the half damage on
that. Ezra, just not Ezra's just not
gonna let Regina see it coming. Nope, I just did.
Just cover her eyes. Yeah.
You could give her full cover currently actually.
I am. I am giving her full cover.
Yeah, I would say that only because of the fact that she
already was kind of blown over a little bit and her legs were the
only thing showing. So you probably like would drop
her, yeah. Man, man, you just got a dad and
he's gonna die. Yeah.
So you took half of that, which was 18.
I don't know if that still puts you down, but.
Me. No, Dad's down.
Dad is down. Ezra OK, So yeah, your, your
your dad is is is currently unconscious on top of you.
He took no damage because he took all of it for you.
Hey. Well, thanks Dad.
And 18 for yourself there, Franklin.
Yeah. With another Constitution saving
throw to follow, I think it is. No, no, no, no.
He's not within range. You guys aren't within range of
it now. You guys are.
Outside, who is? These little bastards, I think,
yeah, just this one guy here, so I'll roll his page and roll his
Constitution save on. The throw.
Roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll.
In Oh, he just makes it and sidesteps the blast just in
time. No, he doesn't just make it, but
he does make it 19. Fuck you.
You see some of the the edge of the molten metal that was using
to form him the through of it bust and yeah it starts
spreading everywhere all over the floor over here.
Gotta start drawing. But then we've got we're just
going to go quickly through these guys that are over here
that we're working on these larger creatures.
They they, they swiftly gather and huddle near the back
entrance that you can see that there is some sort of exit over
here that they're like pulling at hastily trying to get out.
And they're hoping that the more of them like pull at it, the
more that you can get out. I might actually drink check.
Oh man, these guys are not strong.
And multiply that by yeah, no they do not get out.
Then it would be Regina's turn and.
All right, so. 'Cause the the the other
people's turns are after years the Yeah, good.
So for my mom's skull, how does that work again in battle I know
they get a turn. Is that just completely separate
for me or does that count as part of my action or I forget
what we decided on that? Your your mom has a completely
different action economy than yours.
Yes, that's what we decided last time.
I went back and listened today. Gotcha.
OK, so Mom's skull is going to shoot the sorry, I'm gonna shoot
the necro rifle right at this guy right here that's right in
front of us. Oh.
How do I roll for that? Is that just my roll or like if
I click on Regina's page? Or do I need a separate sheet
for? You should have that one for the
the Ryzone or the Ryzone B that I sent you.
Yes. That would be their stat sheet.
It'll probably just keep that up for reference for yourself so
that you know as well that the rifle that's in your inventory
as Regina would be what you're firing.
So I do not think that the Ryzomi has a proficiency with
firearms yet. So you would probably just roll
to hit without any like bonuses really with that.
It it, it would be dice roll plus whatever firearms.
So plus Dexterity, whatever the creation Dexterity is, yeah.
OK, so. Credit, credit, credit.
OK so I got sorry so I rolled a 22 and you said plus dexterity
or sorry I'm still learning. No worries.
Yeah. How'd you roll the 22 though?
I was on just my rolling the hit DC for the necro rifle.
You probably used your own Dexterity then, unless it was
natural 20 and well, still, even then because you're rolling, you
should be rolling. AD 20 is what it is.
Oh, just your writing. Yep.
And then adding the sure. All right.
I only got analog base so I roll 10 and then plus my dexterity or
the rise. Preacher's dexterity.
Yeah. And if you just went back to
that first roll and you could figure out what your decks like,
what was added to that roll, it should say it's not, it didn't
come through. It doesn't come through on Rule
20 or it would show me. Oh so I had rolled 19.
I'm still trying to pull up the sheet for the Rise zombie.
Yeah. So I would accept that 19 and
then add the right Ryzombie's Dexterity modifier.
I'd accept that. Sorry, let me just pull that up.
Sorry guys. No worry.
How? About say new new mechanical
always takes time. All right, so I have 0 Dexterity
for the Ryzombie. So it'd be a flat. 19 Flat 19.
Makes sense considering it doesn't have hands.
That's valid, yeah. Mom have no hands.
That would definitely it. OK then for damage I just roll
the one on page then. Yeah, whatever the damage of the
weapon is, any bonuses to the to the weapon that's given and the
dexterity of the monster, which would be 0.
So yeah. 14. You aiming anywhere specific?
Right in the head. All right.
Use see mom come out just from out just from behind the
unconscious form of Ezra and line up a shot Franklin and you
see as it's kind of putting its cheek down to the edge of this
rifle as if it's knowing what it's doing.
It start to glow with a green energy as it pulls the trigger
and splats across the face of the creature.
The this molten creature and it starts to oxidize in front of
your eyes almost and its face starts to sink in.
But otherwise it still see doesn't seem to care, wondering
if it even has has the sense to feel that.
Gotcha. Does the the zombie have multi
attack? Because if it does, it counts on
the same action. I don't think so.
I don't think so as well, not until it gets bigger.
It says a rise zombie. Makes 2 rude attacks once.
Yeah, it would make 2 attacks it it would basically think of it
like a a barbarian or a fighter's extra attack.
This is basically how you play it.
OK, so I could just do the same thing over again.
It depends on the weapon. If the weapon requires reload,
it has the reload property. Then it would have to spin an
action to reload. Well, actually, or bonus, it'd
be a bonus action, reload, then fire on the extra attack.
OK, so I get a bonus action. OK, All right then I'll we'll
just reload and then fire again. Fire again.
Do it again. Make it critical.
The reload looks more like it's after it's discharged.
It takes a second for it to back up and after that you fire again
and it's go ahead and move. 13. That does not hit.
I'm sorry. Wait, Nope, I lied.
OK, it does hit. There's it keeps tricking me
with this one number. It does hit.
All right, cool. Let me do Daniel 26.
Damn, that time you strike just below, I'm gonna fill in the
blank for you where you shot before, right around in the
neck. As the necrotic damage seems to
start corroding into its chest, you strike right there, and it
spreads rapidly across its chest.
This time just and then and it starts crumbling at and around
the shoulders in its chest cavity going spreading down to
its waist. It doesn't doesn't quite fall
apart or anything like that, but it does look like that it is
starting to pretty bad. All right, six.
So that is Mom's turn. Can I give Ezra a mango?
It's a little bit different than a health potion in that he has
to eat and swallow it and it's a solid and it makes sense.
We've been we've been been playing it that you kind of
would have to like spend an action usually to give somebody
even a potion usually is the case, but especially in this
case, because I would usually, I usually roll it as a bonus
action for just a potion. But if it's if it's it's since
it's so intensive like. So according to the rules, if
you if you haven't moved, if you haven't moved, if you have not
moved, you can use an interact, you can use an A movement, you
can use your movement for interaction, which allows you to
hand off something, toss something.
Can't you can't, you know, put, you know, drop, you know, a
potion that actually would require an action or bonus
action to do, but you can give something to somebody as
interaction. Yeah, you can no jam it into his
mouth. Yeah, can I like, chew it up
Lady Bird style and like stuff it in since it's unconscious?
That would take a little bit longer.
That's so perfect. Because because so just keep in
mind that your your whole turn in real time and putting in air
quotes there is like 6 seconds per the per the rules as well.
But I I'm pretty lenient. So I mean for.
Me. Daddy, last one.
OK. So that would be my action then,
right? Yes, if you want to chew it up
and put it into his mouth. OK, yeah, I will do that.
So I chew it up baby bird style, spit it in my hand, quickly
stuff it into his mouth. All right.
And that's what, 5 D 4 + 10? Or can I do I have to do the
whole thing? Can I do half or 'cause I
remember whenever I 'cause I didn't?
I don't think he has that many. Did you put one in your
inventory? I just need to look it up
probably. Oh, I have a full mango in my
inventory. Did.
Oh. Boy, oh boy.
Go back. Weird, weird.
That's weird. I need to go to go to your
inventory. I think my inventory, yeah,
'cause you got the, you got it there.
And I was just trying to like search it real quick in, in my
home brew stuff. I wasn't having trouble finding
it, but I know that I made it. Yeah, I have, it says.
I have one singular mango. Oh, here we go, huh?
Oh, here it is at. Two.
Backpack there we go healing mango of youth.
So I I know I made it. You've got the number is wrong.
That's what I thought that's why I wanted to look it up for you
for sure It's 10 D 4 + 20 is what it is.
So half of 1 would be 5 D 4 + 10.
OK so I'm confusing because it says I have one mango, so do I
Does that mean I have half or is the number just wrong?
I think you may have just mis typed it because you you must
have because that looks like a custom item that you put in.
So that was me. So you said it was the full
mango IS10B4 post one and you're looking?
To to do the whole thing with your, with your action.
I mean, I can imagine you just like what's the like the, the
silly animation of a cartoon, just like taking the pit around
your finger and just spinning it real fast and and then shoving
it into his mouth. That's what you're trying to do.
Can I do half of it though 'cause that's a lot of points.
I think he has that many right now.
OK, so I'll do half a mango then.
So I gnaw at it and then just stuff half a wet mango back in
my bag. So I'll deal with that later.
All right, so that's yeah, what I choose to do.
So then that would be for him. That would be then the five D 4
+ 10, right? Yeah.
OK. Yep, I'll remove that.
Oh, looks like you. No, Yeah, I'll remove that half
of 1 because and then I put what I did is I put the healing mango
of youth is what it's called just for your reference there.
And then I put in notes half of the whole one left.
OK. And if you read it, it's.
It's as you're 6 month younger. It's important that you have
like the original one that I created.
So if I have an item or something like that too that I
want to create for you only because I'll just add wording,
but then that becomes law because that is my job.
Right, I'm just not. Which?
Being where you added that I guess.
Healing, maybe refresh your page because I it may, it may take
that, but one important aspect of it is that it it, it never
spoils. OK.
Oh yeah, I do see that now. OK.
Cool gooey gooey. You still have a bonus action
and movement if you don't want to hide under his unconscious
body currently. I feel like.
So fucking brutal. All right, stay hiding.
You're going to stay hiding another.
Correct. All right, like.
A Taunton are. You going to roll that healing
for yourself then, Ezra? Or do you want?
To Oh no, I was, I was going to let Regina do it.
All right, go ahead and roll the 10D4 or the five D 4 + 10.
I'll grab my analog dice. Oh, OK.
OK so I put this math in so I have 33
so 27. Oh, I'm back to full.
All right, Sick. OK.
Very nice. So yeah, you were burnt and
singed and you get the bits of mango in your mouth.
Then you kind of cough as it's going down, but otherwise your
eyes flutter open. Probably going to pretend to
still be dying on the ground, but your wounds under the burns
start to heal. Start to feel an itching
sensation across your whole skin.
And Regina's hiding under him. Yep, correct.
Also if you haven't had one of them this year, I don't think
you yourself have. You've currently lost the year
of your life, so you are now one year younger.
OK, so I went from salt and pepper to salt and Gray.
Well, black and Gray, yeah. All right, I'm going to use and
and you said you're done at that, Regina.
Yeah. All right, Franklin.
All right, so at the start of Franklin's turn, while his form
is nearby, you guys see that after the fireball he's at about
half health. I don't know how Regina's still
standing, but a large amount of the burns that have like
occurred across his head and like shoulders since he took a
direct hit. As he turns to look at you, you
see close up as he gained 6 health at the start of his turn.
Josh, if you want an explanation, I remember.
Yeah, I have the I have a the evocation that maxes out my
health gains so long as my familiar is nearby.
Oh. I always thought it might have
been because of the book It's Will.
And so that's so I gained the one D6 because of the book, but
I have an warlock invocation that says anytime you gain
health and your familiar is near you, you gain Max health.
Beautiful. Just six health every turn.
It's sexy. That is sexy.
He then pulls out a black book. It defies reality and Franklin's
eyes go black, his skin becomes necrotic, and his familiar,
which is his skin now takes flight.
So all you see now of Franklin is a skeleton, bones gnawed
clean with dark purple glowing black eyes as he enchants or
recites a chant. I'm targeting this guy, assuming
it's a creature that I can target, right Josh?
I didn't see the ping. The guy in the far north, is
that like an active? Thing they have not taken a turn
yet. I will cast Dominate Monster on
it as unholy words echo from my skeletal form.
OK. And a dark purple energy or
purplish green energy shoots towards this thing.
I guess green because Franklin's a green turtle.
It needs to make it Wisdom save DC18.
Please God fail. Please.
Please please please please. Please fucking fail.
Just. Otherwise we need to run what?
Is it considered is it considered a a charm ability?
You attempt to beguile a creature that you can see within
range. It must succeed on a Wisdom
saving throw or be charmed for the duration.
So it is a charm. Yeah, it's probably, I mean to
charm, isn't it? You feel it wash over it to no
effect, feel a soul that you can grab on to.
Oh, that's so terrible for us. Oh, no.
Did you? Did you try to chant the Pimp
the? Pimp.
Oh, that? I have one of those.
Yeah, well, I turned to the others.
All right, guys, we're fucked. I might have to sacrifice myself
for you guys. I look at the book.
That means you would be destroyed.
Look at the others. You're young.
You're basically children. Both of you.
Get into the pocket rocket and tell my story.
Actually, later come back out and see if there's a ring on the
ground, but then tell my story. Take the ring.
I've got a, I've got a full proof.
I've got a, a proof against death currently.
All right. Well.
And as I say that, I will transform into my form of dread
as Franklin then grows a size and a half, chains sprout from
his neck and wrists and ankles and he gets a really cool like
flame or like Afro and that will gain 1D10 temporary HP, which is
maxed out at 10 because I'm next to my thing.
Franklin's going to die. So one D 10 + 3 SL gained 13 HP
of temporary hit points. Nice, so that was my action and
my bonus action. My familiar now wields the Staff
of Swarming insects and will cast from it.
Giant insect choosing from among itself to create.
And I'm using the giant wasp stat block to create 5 flying
dire crickets that will each lay into this creature in front of
me. Oh, the one that this one.
Yeah. OK.
So there are five of them. They have a + 4 to hit pretty
good. 518 is the lowest it. Was all hit.
OK, it will take one D 6 + 2 piercing plus 3D6 poison for
each and needs to make ADC 11 con save 5.
Times you do, you want to do them individually because I'll
tell you right now, it's not surviving all of those.
Oh, I'll do them individually then.
Yeah. OK SO1D6 +2 so 8 on the 1st then
it rolls the con save. Then it rolls the con save OK.
And if it fails it will take. Yeah, it failed at 11 I think,
right? Yeah, it'll take 10 points of
poison damage. Oh, that's dead 8.
Woo Hoo. Wait, yeah, I was just making
sure I'm bouncing back between. So yeah.
Right, if the poison reduces the target to 0, the target is
stable but poisoned for one hour it is paralyzed.
OK, so didn't the didn't take the 10 or no it does like if it
becomes unconscious due to the 10 poison damage that you just
did, it went unconscious to it's not dead.
It is paralyzed and unconscious for in the next hour.
Which means we. Get a new a new.
Pet that's nice. It's at 0 and has and so it's
currently not. Basically I'm just I just I'll
read. The thing because if the poison
damage reduces the target at 0H hit points, the target is stable
but poisoned for one hour even after regaining hit points, and
it is paralyzed while poisoned in this way, so it's stable,
just unconscious, not dead. Stable usually means it has like
one hit point. I thought that's why I was like
trying to clarify it. Well, like you could stabilize
an unconscious person and they're still unconscious.
Which usually puts them back up to.
No. Then they had.
Then they're conscious again. So stable means you're at zero
hit points. You're just.
You're not making, you're just. Not making rules, Yeah, got it.
Yeah. All righty.
So it is at you will. Currently it is.
I'll put AX on it. No, let's put a sleepy thing on
it. I turn to the others and I say
Oh my God baby, the other four are going to go for this guy.
I guess I'll just use the same roles to attack if that's OK.
Well. That's not big enough.
I want the X2O. I can put both.
So they're going after that guy? Yep.
I assume can I use the same D 20s that I rolled for the attack
on the sky? Yeah, and you said nothing below
an 18, those all would hit then? Yeah.
OK. So the first one, one D 60 God.
So 1 + 2 three points of piercing and it makes its 11 DC
con. Six.
So no. And it takes 10 points of poison
damage and then the next one is going to be five points of
piercing and it makes the save again. 12 just makes that.
That will succeed. It does not take any damage.
That's that's three of them right?
Two have two more and two more. 2 so #3 is 3 points of piercing
with the save paddoop paddoop. 7.
Fail 13 points of poison damage. Who are you looking pretty bad?
#4 which is the last one, five points of piercing damage and
then it makes it save 14 and it will succeed.
So it will not take that damage. It's.
Worse for the wear though, the the the first one the first
cricket crawls into the inside of it, realizing that it is
mostly hollowed out from the corrosion and kind of pulls out
a gear and goes look Ed in in dire cricket that you understand
obviously and it. So proud of you.
The next one start swarming the the secondary one, which hasn't
taken any damage to this point and starts ripping pieces of it
off in in attempts with its poison going in between and kind
of gumming up its work through the hill, but it's still
standing and potentially moving. I'm gonna move forward.
So I was here in an attempt to shield these two from further
damage. I'm gonna move right up on this
guy. And that was my attack, my
bonus, my movement, my swarms attack.
It doesn't have a bonus action, no.
And that's my turn. And I turn to the others and I'm
like, please don't die. I feel really bad and that big
thing is fucking scary. The thing I don't.
Know what to do about that? At the end of the hall for
chunks and starts to move off of the platform, but as it's doing
so pretty much to no real. Here we go.
Yeah, to to no real other effect other than its movement
currently starts to. 5-10. Dooney right to the massive
anvil that is directly in front of it and just kind of taps it
just the smallest bit and the the ringing sensation that goes
throughout the chamber resonates with your soul souls.
I don't have a soul. I sold it.
The thread that ties into the to your being, I guess and a
disembodied head forms over top of the reflecting pool in the
center of the the the temple by these gold patterns that are in
inlaid in the floor just turned to liquid as he chimed the the
anvil and they and formed this very obvious dwarven looking
head above the reflecting pool with its full braided beard and
braided hair and it just harks to you all.
Of who defies my rule. Here and it yes, start searching
the chamber and turns to you. Oh.
It appears it is the nameless 1. The.
Franklin I understand, little one.
And I. Don't think you heard me,
Franklin. Yes, yes, and I am Kai Shen at
the moment. But Oh yeah, you're not as
little right now, that's right. But to him, you're still kind of
little 'cause his head's about the size of you, even at the
larger form that you're in. And he goes.
You are unable to swear fealty to me, I understand, but I'd
literally die give you all a second chance at this.
You may either relinquish your bonds, which apparently you
cannot, or relinquish relinquish your treasures.
It's option C. Option C says C, Option A.
Follow it again, get to see you. What's option D?
Adoption D is they summon the rest of my body and you get my
D. So you're saying I could sell my
body for our safety? I've done that before.
Back when I was a kid. My my parents did that to the
all time and the priests. Just start shaking his
disembodied head. You've you.
You can feel the hand raised to the eyebrow.
You don't see anything. Like to the others, this seems
like a good deal to me. What do you think?
As we're on the ground front. It's a skeleton now, so like my
bugs will have to form the rest of me to like, give you some
sort of sensation. Are you cool with that?
What's your safe word? He just kind of looks around and
juggles gold, gold. Isn't gold what you want?
Always and forever. So you're turned out by gold,
but it's all seriously OK, that's fine with me.
Shit. Well, Option D sounds like the,
well, straightforward solution to our problem.
You're all 14, right? Well technically I'm like 4000
but like trapped to the body of a skeleton 14 year old.
Well, age is just a construct, right?
Look at the others. Woof.
Yeah, yeah, technically I'm really old, but this seems
wrong. Yeah, little one, you're making
me even feel dirty, I think. I think I'd rather just kill you
all. Oh.
No, I was gonna say we could just go be Bygas.
Be bygas. We'll take off.
If you could just do your thing. How about that?
No. I think at the very least you're
going to have to give me something to release.
You I got something to tables. I didn't catch either of those,
they've said at the same time. Ezra Mumbles.
I got something you can release. I have a small bag of sand.
Throw it at a. Thing.
Oh, sorry, a little bag of sand, as it says.
I have something quite valuable. I have one sheet of.
What was that, Regina? Oh, nothing, go ahead.
I was just being stupid, I said. I have one sheet of parchment
and a little bag of sand that's. Hard to get down here.
Yeah, say, is that enough? Your your monster.
Monster illness. You shall call me your Lordship.
And no, I have plenty of that. That would be but a poultry
item. You're greedy, right?
You want something nobody else has.
No, yes, that would be great. What do you have?
Well, I may have some stuff, but like I did some surefire
guarantees that if we were to trade with you, you wouldn't
just like kill us on the spot and take the items 'cause you
are the God of greed, right? And you hear as if a clapping 22
solid claps and the half alive, mostly burned pimp individual of
the priest glows heels up. And he just goes.
So thank you, my Lord. And he goes over to the scroll
that's sitting on a kind of a what do you call that?
Basically a desk of some sort. Table.
Yeah, sure. What have you.
Pulls out some quill and and and.
Waves it in the air and he says, you have my word spoken and
written and I cannot break either as a as a ruler here.
Ash OK so I take out mobile of liquid and I place it on the
table. Do you know what this is?
That seems to be a bit of the reality.
It is. Do you have this yet?
I have means to get it. Yes, I have.
You don't have it. It's not hard for one like
myself to get though. Turn to the others.
It's really easy for us to get this.
We got a pretty steady supply, got steady supply, somebody
steady supply. But you know, like and I pick it
up and I try to make a big show of like it being mine and being
out of his like reach. But it is Vine and well, only
one person in the room has it right now.
That's me. Well, its effects aren't that
fully necessary for one like myself either.
It is useful for subjects of mine, but.
You don't like I'm going to, I'm going to add it to your
inventory because I did create it.
It was one of it was on my list and I did it.
I did the thing. And the only other thing I have
that's worth anything? Wait, I'll pull out a buck.
I got another option for either big guy.
I know where this is going. This is an object dot from here.
You literally can't get this anywhere else.
I have two. Backpack, by the way.
I'll take a look. And you?
Could choose which one you want because I've kind of read
through them. This one, the United States Army
Special Forces Guide to unconventional warfare.
It was written on the planet Earth in China.
China. I don't know how to pronounce it
correctly. Very useful.
This other one printed the you did states.
You did. You did.
States of America. He's a skeptic's guide to the
universe. How to know was really real.
Or when I pull out the third of the butt crystal, I have this
giant crystal. He goes, oh, I've got, I've got
plenty of those. However, that first book you
mentioned is of some interest to me.
I could. Put it.
A fair amount of use I think. Could I perhaps peruse it first
to see it and appraise its value as it is unvaluable currently?
Look at the others. Sure, but only if you'll open
that door. We won't leave.
We just want to know the door's open.
That seems amenable. And you guys hear him clap again
and the the statue does the back here doesn't move, but you see
as the doors swing open and you must have missed it in the sound
of the other one moving at almost the exact same time.
But there is one directly in front of the door now, current
doors. Currently he's that big.
It's just one statue in front of both doors at the on the steps,
with the two guards that were standing outside under its
heels. Oh boy.
Nice splashes of blood trickling down the steps.
Splashes of blood. They just ran up and just
smashed people. You've seen how much they care
about their worshippers with the other guys.
Wrong. Yeah, I need to figure out how
to kill these things. But I will walk forward so that
the head can see as I, while still holding the book, open it
up and start flipping through it and kind of detailing some of
the things that I have previously read.
This here is called Vapal. Let me tell you, it has a longer
storied history of their world. I can imagine he he's just kind
of letting his eye skim across it while you're flipping through
the pages real quickly and he goes, I think this would suffice
for one life and the others. Have pledged themselves to me.
He looks over your shoulder. Which is all I really desire
when you come into my temples. Because.
See how it could be a problem if someone's already like pledged
to someone else that their life literally depends on them not?
Yes, breaking that. Pledge, absolutely.
That's that's why we why why I've come up with this secondary
option for my clock works to Alert me of a system error if
you will, instead of burning down the whole building.
I think I could accept this for your raise to me in exchange for
not being one with myself. On being one with you.
Yes, you know, pledging your fealty.
What was told to you by this one over here?
He nods to the pimp priest and he goes.
Hey right, you should tell people that before they walk in
the door. They should have.
He looks over to him. Did you not tell them?
And he goes. Well, the gods should have been
the ones to do that. That is their jobs.
He gestures out to the. Blood stains on the on the steps
just to be clear too. I think they did say it at the
door. I didn't go back.
Well, there's no proof of that anymore.
No, no, they're dead. Maybe we should sue these guys.
You would like to sew me a sweater?
I don't understand. There is, there's, there's no
lawyers here. But this is hell.
I figured it'd be full of lawyers.
Wrong world. Joy.
Yeah. I mean, I'll trade you this book
to dot die. The question is, what else will
you give me for this book? And here's the next thing.
What about? It's pretty priceless, right?
My life, yes. No, I sold it.
There was a definitive price on it.
I mean to you I without it, you can't do anything right?
True. All right, well, here's the
thing. Do we give you this book thou
and trust that you don't like kill us?
Or do we make some sort of like transfer arrangement system so
that when we leave that that you can have it?
I will allow you to exit the building and get so far as the
bottom of the steps. You must walk through the legs
of the statue though, and at the bottom of the steps you can
place the book and the statue will take care of the rest.
Try insight check. You can.
Is he secretly just going to squish me and the others?
You can see that not only is he saying all of this, but the the
pimp priest has been writing it all down.
OK. And you can take this as your
your. Proof.
And he let's the preacher walk up to him, and he kisses the
bottom of the of the scroll that he's been writing the words on,
and it glows gold like a golden lipstick almost at the bottom of
the page for his signature. I examine it.
I agree, smiling to myself. I got your DNA now, bitch.
I don't say that out loud. Oh, OK, I was going to say.
All right, well, look at the others.
What do you guys think? Do you want to give up this book
to not die right now? I like living.
I didn't catch that for Ezra. I'd prefer to eat them.
I mean sure, but like, do you think we can?
We can wait for the party, as you said.
All right, well, this is a separate temporary stopgap
measure. Then Franklin checks his
notebook, the black book, which he'd probably transcribed a lot
of this, into one last time before handing over or standing
up, nodding and turning to the others.
Be like, all right, well, we're gonna go.
This place is oh, hey, that's the thing, right?
We're Taurus looking to check out the seal on this level.
Just wondering what that is. You mean like sealed?
I didn't catch that you. Mean like that, that animal that
slaps its pins together and barks.
No, like you know, like the the 9 seals that whole Baliopolis
down beneath the earth. Or Terrace?
Yeah, that's just a just a fable.
He looks around. They're not.
Don't be spreading any of that in my caverns now.
Oh well, I am the one in Almighty here.
And the the creator in this the the pimp loot.
Preacher is kind of like making like a like a putting his finger
over his lips like pushing motion towards you while the
head's turned and then and then he kinda you gotta make an
insight check on the preacher real quick for me. 20.
You can tell from his my names he's telling you to meet him at
the Greedy Goblin after this for a less formal meeting.
Got it. I nod.
All right, we're gonna take off now.
You're a lordship. Great, great, now there is only
the the thing to be held true to you others that have prove your
fealty to me. And he looks towards Ezra and
Regina. Once per day you shall hold a
gold coin up in the air and it will disappear, and once per
year you'll get a 10% return on that.
Fucking bank. As long as I rule this portion
of hell, that is. He throws in with like a mumbled
quickly, like almost like you're telling he's reading like a the
small print on a contract. Yeah, exactly.
Side effects might include. Good thing ours doesn't have any
fight in front between the door and the bottom of the stairs.
Franklin's gonna stop, take out like some black ink and just
black out the entire book. Walk through the guy's legs and
put it on the ground like there's your book.
Oh shit. Fuck you, I'm gonna walk away.
The statue does not react. It can does not seem to be
paying. Enjoy reading that.
Yeah, that's a bit of attention. And as you, Ezra and Regina get
close to the door, he calls that gold coin before you leave to.
As proof of your fealty. He says while you're looking up
at the statue. Oh, you sold for a?
Gold coin, I did it for last so don't worry about it.
No judgement here. I did it for a can trap.
You're ready. Ezra takes out two gold pieces
and holds them up. One over Regina's head, I'm
guessing Yes. And as you do and you you walk
through the door, you feel your hand, lighter on the other side
of the arch archway, look up and see that they're gone.
And you hear cackling fading away behind you as the head
melts back into the tile floor and the statue on the other side
of the temple walks back into place.
Ezra. Ezra leans over to Franklin.
We're making the boom really, really big, right?
Oh also, did you drag that one corpse out or?
Oh yeah, I mean, if I, if I can get away with it, feel like this
is mine, I kill them. No one would stop you at this
point, I think. Fuck yeah.
Except the one that you were fighting that was almost dead
would go back into the fires in the forge as if bathing.
Ground forage, guys. Now we gotta train him.
So what? What do you do with him though?
I mean, he's unconscious. I would probably, once we're
free pocket rocket him and. Ezra's help probably.
Right, 'cause hey Ezra, can you help me lift this giant thing?
I'm thinking we could use it like a Minecraft like store room
where you just lock up behind a row, but then you could just
like order stuff. Go see Skew.
I got a Nosebleed. Does the corpse have any weapons
or inventory on it? 3020.
Yeah, you pick up its leg at the eye and we're able to just get
under its hip and you can, you can feel that.
You can probably drag it across the floor like that.
As for your question, Regina, it has stuff on it.
Mainly though, it looks like a hammer that is molten as well as
it or no it's. Not.
Molten anymore it it still glows with some heat though below that
or above the handle and it seems to grow glow with an inner heat
and it kind of has heat waves coming off of it even but the
rest of its corpse has cooled since its unconscious nature.
You're that's why you're able to grasp it Ezra.
Although it is still hot to the touch, it is not unbearably at
this moment. I'll have to get some other
meds, turn to the others, I assume after we've kind of like
made our way a little while our little ways, are you?
Gonna move yourselves? Right.
I put this to the pocket rocket, I think.
And then I guess the best place to put it would be like, gosh, I
don't want to put it in water because it will kill it.
Can't put it into the skeleton cage.
Why not the? Skeleton Cage and the the
skeleton monster and this thing just becomes sort of like
conglomeration. The skeleton can be your Ditto.
Yeah, we just keep. It's like a stewpot.
You just keep shoving, like chucking stuff in there.
Eventually something cool will come out I guess.
For now, can we fashion some sort of like chain system to
like bind it hand and foot? Do you guys have something like
that? Or wait, no, there was the
shoot. We can't take it underwater.
I was going to say, we have that little like alcove that the guys
have been digging, but it's underwater.
Yep. Shoot, I guess we could lock it
in the front room until we decide what to do with it.
The face of the statue are you guys, you guys want to move down
to the bottom of the steps for me just so that we are all on
the same page. Yep.
See, you nerds hate this place. I pick up a stone on the way out
inside the door wing. Ezra, you bump the head of the
thing a couple times on the steps on the way down.
Oh, he does. His intention, he does.
And you're standing there mulling over what to do exactly,
and the face of the statue morphs into a similar looking
dwarven face that you recognize from the that which had floated
above the reflecting pool inside of the temple and goes, are you
looking to make another deal? Because I think I have something
that could help you contain beasts.
Yeah, what do you want for it? Oh, I would.
I would take a sizable fortune for it.
Lucky for you, I don't have one. Well, in my sugar, Baba doesn't
exist anymore. In that case, I would reasonably
take, I don't know, something of lesser value.
It's it's it's a minor trick. I could give you a few to start
off with. Hey, something of lesser value.
I hold up the rock that I just picked up.
Not quite that low of value, look.
At the others I have Oh, I'll pull out an astral diamond.
What about this OH. He squints at it and goes.
I could give that to some of my followers.
Again, useful item for me in that.
Regard I. Don't think I could personally.
Use it. But.
I know, I know how I can do so I think I could give you one of
these items that I'm thinking of for that.
Sure. We'll do one for one trade and
then if it works out, we could talk about more.
OK. Yeah.
What's your item? He pulls out from what looks
like the buttocks region of the statue, A small sphere of metal.
What looks like that has a lot of it kind of as you look a
little bit closer, it kind of looks like a rubber band ball of
iron. Cool.
And he called, he says this is my item that ioffer.
If you are interested in the general terms, I believe they're
called an iron bands of binding. That's sexy.
How many of these do you have? On me.
Well, on this individual, like I said, I think I have, I have 3
currently three. I'll give you 3 astral jabs for
three but I had bands of hiding seems.
Like a reasonable deal at this instant.
I would ask though, for those diamonds, they are for Ishmael's
tower, are they not? Yeah, I've got a few.
Well, he definitely was one of the instrumental beings in
creating these. So it's only fitting.
And he he reaches behind the statues posterior again and
pulls out two more balls to match the first one.
Fuck yeah, right hand. Once we get them, I'm going to
hand one to each of you guys. See that you have one.
And so we have a deal again. If so, then set the crystals on
the steps at the bottom and I will roll these ones down.
I'll step. I'll put them on the step at the
bottom. And comes tink, tink, tink, tink
down the steps. These iron bands of binding.
They're called in their little they they are a rare item,
wondrous item. You can find them in, usually in
your inventory, so. Mobile.
It's like pokeballs. I'm wondering when I was
wondering when somebody would figure that out.
Are they red and white with a big circle in the center?
Not quite. Oh well, is cool.
Yeah, so, so we have to well, he's unconscious, so it should
be like a pretty easy win. I round that my shot and I throw
my pokeball of bands of binding. I had bands of binding at it
and. It automatically sets Yep and.
It does Blue bloop bloop bloop bloop.
Yeah, twist my cap around like a real Pokémon bastard.
Before I was only insect type, but now I've got a Fire type.
Slash steel type, Slash fighter type.
Wow, that thing was nuts. That was a terrible place to be.
I want to you guys want to do. The statue nods to you and goes.
That's been fun having you in in the church, though it's been a
while since I've had something to keep me entertained.
You did ask what to do around here where the mines are to the
north. Oh thanks aha God.
Where you were coming from, the city is to the West.
You can get to the door at the northwest up there.
It's around the temple. Where you came from to the South
is you wouldn't really like that area.
It's it's infested with magma elementals and the like.
Look at the others. I mean you guys don't have
Pokémon yet? If you had trouble with my gods,
I can for assure you, you're going to have more trouble down
South. Oh, why are they stronger than
you? Not me, just my gods.
Oh, why? Look.
Literally made of magma. Why aren't yours?
Wonderful question, I'm working on it.
Oh good. Hey, before we go, what are your
main weaknesses? Good trying little one.
Damn it. Oh yeah, you're you're a
dictator. I'll be sure to tater your Dick
later. Again, I'm fourteen.
Age is the. Construct anyways, he's not a
very good guy. True.
Off we go. Whoa, this is a terrible temple.
We should never come here. Which way are you going though?
I turn to your age where you want the mines or the city that
we were in. That guy wanted to beat us.
I don't know if you noticed it, but there was a guy who wanted
to beat us later I'm pretty sure.
Edgar kind of scratches, scratches that around his ears.
Let's go meet him then. Yeah, the city, I guess.
What do you think there, Regina? Yeah, let's go find the guy.
Can always use more friends. Yeah, I guess so.
How are you guys feeling? I've got Leon hands.
I could heal you guys up a little bit.
I could benefit from that. I will.
What about you, Ezra? I've got 35 HP to spend.
Ezra's little girl healed him all the way back up.
Wow, here, level 2. That's right.
I just need 11. OK, I will pump her for 11 HP by
the power vested in me by the spirit of revenge and eating
people, I give you hell. Thanks for the hell.
You're welcome. And that was a hell of a gift.
I. Realized today guys, I need a
weapon of some kind. I don't have any.
History. Today, history.
He's the gym. So you guys go back towards the
town? Yup, to go lick our wounds.
I. Wanted to make sure before I
described you guys walking back up to if you were, if you were
doing that, I'm guessing walking a bit north and West towards
that door that you guys came through.
In this north and West, off you go.
Oh God. And you go to the past it.
There you go. Yep, that door.
It all turned around down here. The metal door that you guys
came through again, you open it. This one here.
I do. I did one.
That's right. You guys did walk through it
fully. So you guys open the door no
problem. It's not locked or anything like
that into the metal tube of a hallway that you found
yourselves in before. Look over the edge, freaks.
Down there. Hello.
Down there. You mean around there?
Because you're you're walking into a Cliff face.
Currently, But yeah, And before just now, I could see the rest
of the map and there was like a Cliff that was going like North
and South of us. Yeah, those weren't.
So I thought this was a bridge. Yeah, opposite.
This is a tunnel. Got it.
Into the Cliff face, apparently. Wow is this I'm going to put
down a few of my bugs. Be like, I need you to scout the
area for me. We need a determinity choke
points. I I Sir, you mean like what you
do at night kind of choking or? No, Well, no.
So you basically just I'd sit down and draw a map on the
floor. Here's an example.
A choke point would be like this small corridor here.
So if there's a crowd of creatures trying to get to you,
you can only get to you one by one.
So if you could find, say, for example, like choke points
around this temple, we could blow them.
And then he'd only have a certain way that he could leave.
And then we could, I mean, ideally we could pack the entire
temple full of explosives and then destroy the choke points
and then blow the temple so there's nowhere to leave run to.
But yeah, just live around, you know, see if you see anything
interesting. Israel likes that, yeah.
Anything for you, master. But where's the temple?
I point through the door back where we came through.
You might actually if you can. Get in there and eat the book
that I gave him. I inked it out so he couldn't
read it, but I don't know if he's got like a secret magic ink
remover to remove that ink. So if you could just like eat it
or set it on fire or something. Was it just one that you pulled
out then or you said I thought you said you pulled a couple
out, How many you think? Like 3.
I mean, I can pull like a hit, like a small handful out like a
squad. OK, All right, squad, this is
your post. Oh, OK, yes.
I have that dude. OK.
He's a Dick. OK, yeah, they salute you and
wander off in that general direction.
Great. I'm going to turn to the others.
All right. Now we go back to the city and
beat that guy all. Right, let's go.
Let's rock. And we're walking.
You keep going South, directly towards the sign that reads the
Greedy Goblin. Ezra will probably pick Regina
back up, put him on her shoulder just for safety, no?
We got it this way. There we.
Go and you guys find yourselves out Paste, paste, right click
there we go paste. Yeah, I am having issues with
row 20 right now. I just moved the map again so
you might have to fractional. Yeah, like I I go to click Ezra
and it does not want to let me move.
It's like highlight. No, I don't want to highlight
you. Get your vision on controlled by
just making sure. Yeah, you should be able to.
From my side of things, I sometimes I miscalculate things
on the token. Part My phone is also really,
really tiny, so you know, oh. You're using your phone.
I have used. I have used that in the past.
It is a big pain to move move your character around.
So if you need me to move you around, just let me know.
Yeah, I'll have you do it because yeah, I got big fat,
pudgy fingers and that's not helping.
No, and especially once you click on something, it it it
does not really. Yeah, the Roll 20 does not work
very good on the phone. I've tried it.
It it it loads better on my phone, it crashes less than my
computer crashes it. Interesting.
Yeah. But yeah, you guys find
yourselves there, there with two guards standing on either side
of the door. Hopefully you guys can see that
two new guards that look very similar to the ones that stood
there before. Stand aside.
They look at you, look at each other, then go, well, did you
pay the fee? I stepped forward and I'm gonna
attempt to kill one of them. Oh, Ezra, Ezra's going to walk
up and with an angry look, Move before I eat you.
On the other one. Yeah, like intimidation.
All right, intimidation, go ahead and roll and tell me how
you're trying to kill the one, I guess.
Let's see. My rolls not are are hot
garbage. Hot garbage.
My roll hot garbage are the five to intimidate.
I will be sure. That he's not doing worse than
that. I'm an Eldridge, blast this
dude. I mean, if my guy doesn't move,
I I am going to eat him. And then you get another one
too. A deck save is that with the
Eldridge blast requires. No, it's a, it's A to hit.
Sorry I did a 21 to hit. Oh, that'll hit.
The other one, the second one, is a 20 to hit and it.
Does. My my guy doesn't feel scared,
does he? I already forgot what I rolled.
I was looking at another thing. It is bigger than five.
Yeah, it was the. 13th I'm I'm I'm I'm going to eat him now.
OK. He just kind of let's you tower
over him and his breast seems hotter than it should be on your
chest. Let's.
See, let's see what the So that'll be 14 all to hit him. 14
all to hit him. 14 does not Does a dirty 20 hit you?
I hope so. Oh, yeah, I'm angry.
Grab on shoulder and there goes his his throat's mine.
I'm hungry. I'm having lunch now.
I'm numb. Numb.
Roll the damage. And for mine, six points of
damage for my two hits. Oh.
For both of them. Ten points of damage right to
the facepiece or throatpiece they.
Both. Are just hanging on by a thread
of life. You can see as you're ripping
his throat out, Ezra and your two bolts slammed directly into
the the first. The second guard there, Franklin
and go ahead and roll me deck saves at disadvantage both of
you since you guys are closer to them normal for yourself.
Sure they need to. Mine needs to make a wisdom save
too. Oh, what's that for?
If I attack, oh wait, no, I'm no longer in form of dread.
Oh, OK, it's gonna say 21. Yeah, what a bit of would have
worked video that's six because. Frank, I'm about to say yeah,
Franklin, we get the +3 for you, right?
Yeah. OK, Yeah, 21.
Seven for Mary. That that was not.
Right. Regina.
Take your anger out on these goblins, Regina.
Descend Into Darkness. It was I rolling dexterity
saving, sorry. I see that.
Does she have, does she have a vantage?
Because she has an advantage that she's on me and I.
Passed she she definitely beat beat it.
I was going to say. So she only takes wow such a
shitty role as well for myself. Two damage for yourself and and
Ezra, but four damage for you Franklin as these guards
literally puncture these tanks that you can see on their hips
and they in a bowl of flames and fall into a pile of ash on
either side of the stub. Ash can't even use them.
Perfectly good waste of a meal. Right.
Although the register. Is hungry.
There is still a a throat in your mouth, Ezra.
Regina's gonna stick her hand in the ash and then lick it off.
Good. Constitution save the throat.
Oh, that's 'cause she's like Ezra.
So you can try that. No, no, eat this.
It's like there's a little piece of throw over.
To you 14. You're able to just get it in
your mouth before Ezra's able to get to you and you pull it out
with a with a popping sound and say because it reminds you of a
good BBQ, you can tell me what you say.
Tastes like chicken, that's all I say.
Oh boy. Well, that blew up on our faces.
All right, what do you guys want to do?
We could go ahead and get a drink like our woods.
Do you guys need an egg from the store?
We still have time to wait, I think, for our things from the
store. We do, I just didn't know if you
needed anything else. I'm realizing I don't have any
sort of weapon, so I might spend some time tinkering with some of
the stuff I have to try to build 1.
Ezra hands you a hand. Axe Oh, hey, thanks.
This worked good. Those worked pretty good.
All right, what do you guys want to do then?
Get a drink. We go get a drink.
Yeah, Am I old enough conference.
We're all old enough to Drake. We're dead.
Valid. Pretty sure.
You guys walk in then then see everything is goblin sized,
which is adequate size for yourself, Regina, even while
you're kind of ducking through doorways and making sure your
head doesn't hit on light fixtures as a.
Why do I see the pimp preacher in here?
He's. Watching us walk in directly and
that is the first person that you lock eyes with who is kind
of nods in your direction with a drink in his hand.
Do I eat him? No, we're supposed to beat this
dude. I'm pretty sure I heard her
correctly. 20/22/22 I I hold myself back, I don't eat him.
I shift but I don't eat him. Part of you so, Mr. Guy.
Do you woke up? Do him.
Yeah, walk up. Order first.
I order a tall glass of milk. What?
What's wrong with milk? I sit down.
Just show the others to sit down.
Your boss is a Dick. Well, that's me damn sure he's a
greedy bastard. You worked for him.
I want to eat you. Give me reason not to eat you.
I kind of sold my soul long ago. I don't As for a reason not to
eat me, I guess. I don't eat.
I get a I'm working towards a pretty good pension for my
family. So you say there's hors
d'oeuvres What? Let's heal, right?
Food says what? This guy so you wanted to become
meet us what's what for well. You've seemed to have landed
yourselves in a precocious situation.
You you're one of the only adventurers in town for this
wealth festival. That's coming up tomorrow.
Yeah, acquired clarity nobodity. Yes and well, I just wanted to
give you the right out on the the rest of the town here.
I'm sure no one else has told you and has been in a as a
lucrative position as myself with Kaishen, most of these
other. Schmucks in here, he leans in
after he says that and goes They all think that the are owned by
him, which is more or less true, but and they all work in the
mines. You hear a grumbling respond as
he leans back and says says the mines for just a pittance and
the the Lord's favor. And you just hear a 1/2 hearted
cheer at that one go throughout the the bar.
And he he goes, leans in a closer this time too, and he
goes. But if you're really looking to
make your way here as adventurers, most others.
That have made it to this level of hell.
This is the last stop before before venturing Father but I.
Have a sneak exhibition You've been.
Farther than this level already. Yeah, we're going backwards.
It's God. Not really.
You serve a floating head. Who's Otter?
He's got a good boy. Well, he's more than just a
floating head. That's just the form he takes
when he visits the church, you know?
So he likes to give the head to the church exactly as well.
That you know, well, he, he's, he's a pretty busy person.
So that's his quick way of interacting with us while he's
doing his other many tasks. Yes, like showing up with head
and like squeakies, we understand.
Yes, and as you talk, as you could tell, he was very
unconcerned with what age that it comes from anyways.
Sure was. You should know you mean isn't
even closer kind of waves you guys in as close as you can get
to try and like make sure that no one else is overhearing.
Yeah, there's a conspiracy. A conspiracy?
Oh. Those have been that in my
position and or higher they we think anyways that Kaishen is
just an image portrayed in our church and nothing more.
There seems to be somebody behind the curtain, but it is
hard to say who or what they are.
You have to go South of the church, which he generally stops
those visiting to do and and it is usually admirable for him to
do so as most that do die on the elementals.
But Israel leads over to Israel leads over to Regina.
Did you see a cartoon? A curtain.
Oh. Man, we all forgot we had five
rings of fire resistance. Yeah.
Ah, South, you say? He told us they were a bag about
elementals that way that were far more powerful than him.
He said that. He said he's not that strong.
And there are, there are. And you shouldn't go South, he
says, very loud, because you seem to have gotten a little bit
louder. But he leans back in.
He goes. Oh yes, right.
But I've heard other adventurers make it past that point and they
see a door that leads deeper into the Cliff faces.
It's a metal door similar to that to the chore of the church
and that that resides behind the bar.
But no one's, no one sees anyone going in and out of these doors.
We, we don't. We don't understand.
We're simple goblin folk here. So you think they're that is
very, very quiet. What should be others if they
want to pipe in? So you think there's like a like
a hidden chamber where this guy is actually like, chilling?
Something it seems to have been going on for generations of our
lives, though, which? Is why does he have you guys
though? Do you think he's like dependent
on like the people in the city to not dive like?
It's, it seems so. It seems like he's, he's using
us for a resource, you know, to do all of the mining and any
other exportation of goods from this area.
Although, like I said, it's hard to say as as no one's no one's
been behind those doors. Sure.
Yeah, I look to the others, I kind of like gesture to them,
and I leaned to the side and whisper to them.
It has to be like, we got two options.
We can go straight for the door, or we could kill the entire POD,
Todd's population like we said, and starve the bastard out.
Ezra looks at you. I like that option, but can I
eat him first? This guy, Yeah.
I think we need there's a conspiracy.
We need more information about this guy.
Can we eat him after? Yes, I'll turn to the guy.
Hey, we think this is not a super safe location for us to
talk. We have a more secure location
that nobody could hear us in if you'd like to go there to speak
more freely. Oh that sounds wonderful.
Are there drinks there too? There are drinks there, yeah,
lots of them. Great, great.
How do we get there? We got to go up to our bedroom,
so we rented a room at the top of the thing and then we'll
we'll, we'll instruct you how to get in there.
I'd like to lead this conversation with I'm not that
kind of preacher. Dude I'm 14.
Oh that's fair, thank you for acknowledging my pain.
But I understand that we have think of it like a teleportal,
like a portal and do a somewhere else.
OK. And we hide it in the bedroom
because that's the only room you can rent here.
I guess as long as we're we're explicitly clear here.
This, this, this is. This is not me coming on to you.
Right. Yeah.
No, we are definitely not attempting to do that to you to.
Be. Explicitly clear.
All right, let's go. I hop on.
Yes, I will. I will join you in your room for
a nightcap. He's loudly.
Look at the others. God, we're gonna pop this dude
for information. Lead the way.
But the other's approval if they approve.
Oh yes, Edra's nodding big, vigorously nodding.
Yuna gives a thumb. The child.
Yep. Excellent.
Will you lead him up to the bedroom, bring him inside, close
and lock the door? I'm going to pull out the poop
symbol and the pocket rocket. It'll say I know what this looks
like. To start, we're going to have
Regina here where Ezra do a a go in first as an example to you
and I'll walk up to him like make an exaggerated show of
giving him a poop symbol and then like lean in and be like,
you're going to grab him right away, right?
Don't eat him. We need to ask him questions.
Yes. OK, and I turn to the guy hit by
a power of vested bee by the undying Lord of Death.
Go forth into the pocket rocket. I point at you.
Great. Rocket.
So you guys tap your symbols holding on to him basically.
Oh, I don't. Think he was going first as an
example. Yeah.
Oh, I just gave you one. Oh, OK, yeah.
When I like to when I asked you what your plan was, I was like
giving you one. And then he sees Ezra poof into
purplish smoke, with these white lines accentuating him and going
into what looks like a rock in your hand.
Turn to the guy. So this is basically an
apartment. He stands there astounded, and
he goes, Can he come back? Yeah, anytime he wants, he just
has to will himself back out. It's like in an apartment that
we carry around in our pocket. Can you make him come back so I
can see that before? I'll tap my torque.
Hey, then you want to come back out a second?
He doesn't believe that you could come back out.
Do you have a torque still? Franklin has one.
Oh, it's rural that doesn't. OK.
Rural gave his to me, yeah. I was just clarifying.
So yeah, you hear on the necklace that you have around
you Raul's voice request for you to come back out.
Ezra attached the necklace comes back out.
Oh, you form back. Out of purplish smoke into your
original form. That is a nice magic trick.
How come you couldn't? You could have used that in the
temple. I mean, that was part of the
plan, but honestly, there's some downsides to it that we don't
really want to tell you about right now.
That's why we have the locked room.
You got to have. You got to have your secrets.
Yeah, so Ezra, why don't you jump back in, get things ready
and then I'll once he's in and you got to wait like 30 seconds
and then I'll give you one and then you could pop yourself in.
OK then. Ezra pops back into the pocket
rocket, preparing for his soon to be guest.
Yep, OK I given or a poop symbol to the guy, I explain how it
works and I also am going to ready myself so that basically
immediately after he goes I'm going if Regina wants to go as
well. Yes, readying myself to assist
in any way possible to subdue this dude, including and not
limited to removing his poop. Simple.
Unless Regine is better at that. He poofs through coming through
the portal into the pocket rocket after just after Ezra
does, and you're standing in the hallway just outside of the
portal room. Ezra as he poofs in and you can
see two more forming directly behind him in the portal just
seconds later. I don't know how you're
reacting. Oh, Ezra, Ezra's getting the in
the in the in the time span difference between them and
coming in and me coming in. I'm getting my whip out and I'm
and I'm tying him up with my whip with the 17.
I'm gonna grab the poop. Symbol if I.
Can I am? So you're using the whip like a
rope just to click. OK, yes, I, I, I wanted to make
sure I understood properly. And he he tries to he looks at
you with a glint in your eye as you as he materializes on the
other side. What was it that you rolled
again though, for that 7 seven. Yeah, athletics perfect.
So he tries to duck out from under you and you grab a hold of
him firmly and cover his mouth as you start wrapping his hands
behind his back with the whip and then move on to pushing him
down on the ground to to wrap his wrap his feet.
And you guys see that and between you, you grab the charm
off of his necklace with no problem.
And then Ezra asked Franklin for a pole and for Regina to find
him an apple. Do you?
Do what? Ezra asked.
You daughter, go find an apple. An apple on my way.
An apple. And then he asked Franklin for a
long pole all. Right, we'll go find one.
Thank you. Welcome.
Don't kill him, he's a huge source of information.
We do keep the students alive as long as possible.
Don't worry, it takes long time to slow roast.
Fuck dude that's awesome. I'm really glad that you're also
into eating people. We sit there and bond over that
for like 30 seconds and then I'll go get a pole.
I'm guessing Regina would go through the bedroom and not into
the. Into the.
Yeah, not into the skeletons. All right.
OK, so I'm in the kitchen. I was about to say the room with
the giant skeleton. Yeah, avoid touching the
skeleton if you don't want to die immediately.
Will do. And Franklin, that was just
following her out in there and you guys both find what you're
looking for to bring back to Ezra.
Ezra, if you're trying to cook that dude, there's a kitchen
over here. Oh, Ezra Dragon.
At the entry hall. OK, Ezra, I mean you can drag
him if that is your intention, but you could you can find by
dragging him it would be easier even for yourself probably to
just pick him up and carry him. Oh yeah, I'm going to carry.
I'm I'm going to carry him like a rack of ribs under my arms.
Oh, OK. Didn't you just get a band like
a a a poking ball? Yep.
That's awesome. So we have a few options.
We get slow roast and ask for information.
So glad we're in the evil campaign and we can actually do
this to people. PSA to the people listening.
Don't do this in real life. This is not cool.
No, this is a fantasy land of evilness.
Don't. Don't do that.
No. Are you listening?
United States government? Of course you are.
Don't do that. Stop.
It's bad and good help anyway. Back, back to fantasy.
So yeah, Ezra takes, builds a small little fire up, slides the
pole right behind him and undertakes the gag out.
So this is how this works. You answer his questions.
If you don't answer questions, I eat you answer questions, I
might not eat you. Unless you start smelling good
and then shoves the apple in his mouth and starts rotating.
Do you want to roll a who did? Who set up the fire?
Or is when you say you start rolling him like.
Put like, you know, get him on like a little tea, little pot,
little pot bipods with a little fire right below him and start
spending them like he's a pig to a roast.
I guess I should do a a survival.
Sure. Come on, survival beat.
OK, I'm good about binding them up.
Not so much good at cooking. Good cooking.
Regina, will you set fire and and and get it ready to cook?
05/05. Yeah, you're, you're sitting
there with the. And.
The Flint and steel keep sparking, but you can't get the
Tinder in quite the right space for it to light up and and catch
the logs with A5. And then please let me know what
you get, Regina. What am I rolling?
Survival. OK, 16.
Nice. You stand back up and start to
rotate as the flames start to build from Regina's sparking on
the logs. And a crackling, satisfying
crackling starts to build as you finish your questions toward the
pimp preacher, Ezra. And he goes.
I would have answered your questions without all of this.
What are? They Yeah, this is all we know.
I'm famished. And he gives an approving nod
down to Regina. That she, you know, did a good
job making fire. Like a good fatherly, like head
pat and everything. Such a fucked up family.
Brinkley, you have any more questions he'll answer you.
Just take Apple out. Oh yeah, I've got tons of
questions for this dude. Don't worry, this takes a while.
Let's step forward, be like, listen man, let me preface this
by saying we don't want to hurt you, we're hurting you.
But understand it's only because we've been here for so long that
we know the only way to really trust anything anyone says is to
make sure, if you know what I mean.
So understand this is no Mal malcontent or anything towards
you. You seem like a nice guy.
We just got to be sure. So we're not going to try to
turn the heat up too bad on you unless you lie.
And if you lie, he's going to eat you.
So we're going to start by and then I'll slowly walk around
him, dropping like salt in a circle, and then dark or darkly
chant on the holy words and cast zone of truth.
Oh, OK. Around this dude and I will post
that here for you. And then Ezra, while he's doing
that, cop pops in Franklin don't.
But you hurt my pup. I want to eat you.
He's going to want to be able to save you sadistically looking at
him. Big cop All right, so.
The truth, anybody in it has to tell the truth, and Ezra did.
Truth. Yep.
Cast on VTT. Display on two.
Display greatest magical zone 15 foot radius Christmas saving
throw on a fail they can't speak a deliberate lie.
And then I'm also telling him, while transforming into my form
of dread, to give myself a advantage on intimidation.
That's not a once per day thing. Nope, it's a proficiency bonus
times per long rest just. Making sure.
It's like a rage. Yeah, that's what I thought.
So a charisma save for the zone of truth.
But I'm going to tell them to intentionally fail by
intimidating them with that speech.
Oh, so you're you're. Telling him I'm telling him that
he needs to like, choose to fail because we're not here to hurt
him. We just need to be sure.
Going to insight check that, I'll roll my.
Intimidations. Oh yeah, you get inside Franklin
all day. Yeah.
As he's on fire basically. Right 24 intimidation he.
He's looking at you, looking at the fire and just goes, OK,
perfect, accepted. Great.
The spell takes hold when I turn to him and I say, all right, you
said there's a conspiracy. You say it's entirely that this
guy is a facsimile projecting himself on to these golems.
We saw that we were in his castle.
Why is that a surprise? Like, I mean, very clearly he
was somewhere else and controlling these things from a
distance. So you telling us that is only
really confirming what we guessed.
Yes, yes, yes, yes. It's not as, but it's.
It may be a surprise to you, I figured, to know where he might
be residing. That's what I wanted to tell
you. I think he's behind those doors.
Ah, so you truthfully believe he's behind the doors.
Could you list for be Is it just you Who's so is it?
Is it just you who's thinks this or is there like a a group of
you who are kind of like coming together on this one?
Well, I mean, I'm not the only one with the conspiracy.
We've we've all heard it about the adventurers that are passing
through. It's been a while since we've
had such a capable party come into our midst though, so I'm
one of the few higher ups that have the gall to approach any of
you. Right.
So you're essentially saying you're using US being here as an
opportunity to attempt to overthrow your dictator?
I mean in. That's an expensive task.
Government toppling. I mean, I'm here for it, don't
get me wrong, but. Esther looks over to Franklin.
Is he resisting? No, he willingly failed the
truth spell. He just needs to I kick him a
little bit. Speak up.
I. What?
Regina, go get some butter. Listen again, I don't want to
hurt you, man. Like I've hurt a lot of people
for a long time. You seem like you're actually
trying to be a better upstanding citizen.
I'm all for that, you know? I support democracy.
Not for myself, but hey pokem, are you dying?
I land. I land hands to heal him.
Oh, that. Feels great.
Oh, it's still, it's still on, but I'm still on fire.
Yeah, I'll take off my Ring of Fire resistance and I'll put it
on his finger. Thank you.
All right, now talk. What am I supposed to say?
I got was distracted by burning to death.
I want a list of everybody who you think would be sympathetic
to your cause, who's in on it, as well as any node weaknesses
that this guy or his constructs may have.
It's really anything strategic that you could tell me and
you've got not a ton of time left.
Jeez, well, I can immediately tell you there that that list
would take me much longer than it would for me to just die on
the spit to to fill out of how many people there are.
But the most important one that you should know probably is the
weakness that you asked. Yeah, that's a great one.
I can tell you that quickly without dying, yeah.
I mean, tell me that and you're saved, buddy.
I'll put the fire out and you could write that list for me.
You might even be able to go home before bedtime.
Oh jeez, the they're pretty powerful.
They're they're they're immune to to to most damages.
Well, not damages, I guess that's correct, but poison for
sure. The the big clockwork, the big
clockwork golems. And they're immune to, to to
charming. I think you already experienced
exhaustion. Frightened or paralyzed and
petrified or poisoned dude. So what are they weak to?
Come on. Pretty pretty much.
Toasty. Pretty much any non magical
damage they they they aren't that I guess.
Especially bludgeoning would probably be their weak weak,
weak, real weak point. Perfect.
All right. I step forward and I kind of
kick out the the fire below him. I'll turn to Ezra.
It'll be like he's too valuable to eat, unfortunately.
But we can go hunting for somewhat later if you want.
Ezra really is scowling at you. I know, I'm sorry here.
I pull out the remaining goblin jerky that I have.
So this is made out of those goblins that that tried to
attempt to take our buddy when we first arrived.
As long as you over as long. As the other plan is in place.
The other plan will be in place. We'll go hunting right after
this if we secure this guy. OK.
And then he you know, pull, you know Ezra, you know, takes the
guy one puts him down, pulls the spit out from behind him and
then grabs his whip and then just whips him like to to unbind
him from the whip. He just.
Whips him out. Do you want to roll to a hit?
Yeah, I probably need a ruled hit.
Well. You know he probably doesn't
need a Lib, right? If you're hungry, I'm gonna
leave that to you and I walk out of the room.
Regina Hanzas are the stick of butter.
Let's see. We're dangerous, terrible
people. He so hits with the 17 with the
whip to main to maintain the control and he takes a hand for
my pup. Well, I guess Franklin walks
away. I don't know what Regina is
doing, but how do you take the hand?
It with my other hand. I pull out my little hand, my
little hatchet, and come down to leave it off.
OK, he does not he, he, he does not resist as you kind of take
your hand, his hand and yours, and then swing straight down
through the wrist. He looks back up at you, looks
down at his hand and just starts hyperventilating.
And then a high pitched screaming sound that almost is
on a A level that you can't hear.
Don't worry, Franklin fix. And then he looked over to
Regina. This is for him hurting.
See Yay Vengeance. And he grabs his stump that's
spurting blood and he just finishes out his whale with a a
bunch of stuttering noises. I.
Think that. Twice before you touch up, it's.
Going to get on my suit. I'll lay on hands a few minutes
later or before he dies, I will come back, lay on hands to like
cauterize the wound. You come back after you've
turned around to probably he's passed.
Out I went to go get paper and pencil for his list.
I'm just going to roll it to be sure, but I'm pretty sure he
would have passed out. Yep.
Oh damn, that was a Nat 20. So he he just is barely holding
on to consciousness and blinking off in the distance, but shaking
back and forth, holding the stump while you cast it and.
I didn't kill him. You did.
You did great. Thank you.
I put a piece of paper and a pencil in front of them and lay
on the hands his stump. Be like, listen, this is the
price of doing business at hell. We were forced to be here.
This is not our choice. Just the price of business.
Now I'm going to need you. I'm going to lay on hands and a
little bit more. So I'm down from 35 -, 11, and
then minus like 10. So probably like 9 left.
You're going to write down the rest of the names of everyone
here that you think we could convince to turn on the
government because you hit a spark there.
But I hate the government. I don't know why, but then what
we're going to do is we're going to go collect them.
So we need some sort of like phrase or code from you that
will get them to trust us. We promised not to eat any of
them if they willingly cooperate, but you did attack us
earlier. So the hand is recompense, fair
and equal, eyes and eye and all that stuff.
So why do you write down that list?
And we'll make up a bed for you. Because you're going to stay
here with us tonight and for a few more days until this
operation happens. And then we will leave you at
this level of hell to your own fate after that.
Looks up at you with his eyes starting to water.
Which hand did you take, by the way?
Oh. It took his left hand.
And a single tear escapes his eye.
And he goes. I was left-handed.
I guess you're going to have to learn to be ambidextrous.
Actually, wait, how about this instead?
I'll turn. Ah gosh, dig it.
I'll sit down with a pen and pencil and write the names down
myself. You just dictate to me.
I think it would be a a good point to end it on.
Wow guys, we got our asses kicked.
And I did, I did flip a coin for that.
I had heads as right-handed and tails as left-handed and it came
up tails. So that's why I had to ask.
Oh man, thank God. Was so much better.
Like more powerful than us. We had no choice.
Yeah, and sure, maybe we didn't have to torture this guy, but.
Plus you got to know mean it was only that.
Was always on the table for him. Three of you guys, so you can
see that the that the shock troop, so to say the the first
couple that were just gonna like explode the fuck out of you,
right? And then the rest of them that
we're gonna come bounding up. I mean, things might have been
different if the if the big guys were susceptible to charm and
failed. That's true.
But that is not how the dice rolled or their.
Stats. Were.
Oh, Matt, if. You.
They're. Constructs.
So Matt, if you wouldn't, if you wouldn't have got the ceasefire
when Ezra's turned come around, he was going to jump and
literally try to split the head of the temp goblin, which was
going to happen. Man, that would have been sweet,
but I think that probably would have been the last thing you
did. Yeah, I'm only sad that Regina
didn't get to bite anyone's toes off right.
Oh. The guy's still there, Regina.
You want to nibble on some toesies.
Yeah, maybe he's going to lose his other arm.
I mean, I gave, I gave her a hand.
I gave her a hand. So.
So here's my plan. I don't know if you guys have
any opinions, but I think we should get this list hopefully
in queue. Includes a number of the
crafters in town. We collect them, put them in the
pocket rocket, then we explode the town and the dude, and then
we have professional staff. Ezra loves this idea.
Right. We'll have to refit some of the
interior of this place to give them some living quarters, But
and then like, they'll be in here.
So we'll explode everything, right?
And then we'll come back and be like everything exploded.
Oh, no. Oh, no.
There's nothing to live here. You can't live here.
This is safe. You could live here safely and
then we'll learn the true meaning of the level of greed by
killing everyone and taking their most talented individuals.
And Ezra getting swollen. And Ezra getting swollen
hopefully and not dead and. Not dead.
I mean, you survived the the very first encounter that was
very much not meant for level 2. So that's already going to
boost, boost these muscles. And he saw vengeance and got
vengeance. If it wasn't for the big like
giant creatures that were still rolling up, I think we probably
could have stayed there and taken it.
Oh yeah, it would have sucked. But.
Especially after the mango, the the mango mush.
Oh yeah, Ezra was ready to roll. He was ready to go.
Right, another 1411 HP to get hit.
One more turn, back up to full baby, nothing's gonna whack.
Well, I thought, I thought we were all either going to die or
that Franklin was going to die and sacrifice himself to get
away. All he had to do was sacrifice
one of his books that he already read.
Yeah, and hopefully. He can deface it enough.
For that back door that I created into the encounter,
right, 'cause yeah, I. Otherwise that would have been
the end of my I would have died and been transferred into the
ring of mind shielding you didn't have.
And then I yeah, I do. That was what was traded for,
right? No, I traded the the book.
Oh, from the other campaign you have that one you were I thought
it was what was the one that you in?
This campaign I in this campaign I bought in the last game a ring
of mine shielding the staff of swarming insects and the tattoo.
And the ring of mine shielding was still one of the items that
is sitting at this like was on back not back order that was not
there. Oh, that was the one on back
order, OK. Yeah, that and the rhino.
Rhino's hide axe. So I I went back and listened to
make sure I wasn't misremembering stuff but.
But no, yeah, he would have sacrificed himself, died and
destroyed the book. That would have been a cute
ending, but I didn't do that. That's fine.
We're just going to torture someone instead?
Yeah, we did. We sure did for no reason too.
He was like 100% willing to tell us whatever we wanted.
Franklin didn't have a reason. Ezra totally had a reason.
That's fair. I mean, you got to know, you got
to make sure. Yep, everyone must know do not
touch Ezra's pup or you'll die or get eaten.
All right, Nance, I'm going to hop off.
Good night. Night, man.
All right. Bye everyone, good night.
A grand and wonderful thank you for those who took the time and
made it here to the end of the episode where I know sometimes
we are long winded and others we are just dead silent.
I don't know what to tell you. This is raw here folks.
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