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Tara through the campaign, many polos.
Once been in for like 50 years that I could fall through the
fucking floor. Fuck?
Yeah. I'm ready in down to go.
See I think I think you just need that that level of
Adventure, right? Like so a good vacation should
be that engaging. If for the, I wanted people, if
you need them but like, I want to go home.
That's my vacation. Is just supposed to be a break
from your everyday life. It's supposed to be a completely
different than what you do on a daily basis.
What I like my daily basis We're alone.
That's fine. You don't have to, you don't
have to hate it. Just got to switch it up.
And so that's where I'd say that you.
It sounds like you like your work.
Not really the rephrase that I don't hate my work, nor do I
like it. It's a means to an end plus I
think that the other adverse reaction you probably have from
it just personally knowing you in such a you pride yourself in
doing a good job. So a vacation, most of the time
kind of messes up the flow at work.
If you will most jobs I am I like to do a good job but I also
So realize that jobs used to be symbiotic and other parasitic.
So, I'm not such a great worker. Especially when I've saved my
company millions and millions of dogs.
No acknowledgement, my boss. Did you put on in the
spreadsheet that I put it? No, we were, we were paying
people, we shouldn't have been doing.
We're paying them twice. You need to put it in a
PowerPoint slide or spreadsheet and you just send it to
corporate and be like this much money I saved you.
I am corporate. Here's this is what this is the
value. I added last year about how
about a bonus. Well that's why I need to talk
to the big dog, this cf0. Cuz the CFO probably wouldn't
want me to leave, but I need an opportunity to talk to him.
Just walk into his office. I work from home.
Just go to perfect. Find his home.
Zoom problem I like light his home Donna.
I've been in politics, you better be in person you call
them on their best person. Show the confidence in person.
It seems a close second. Not a phone call but seems okay.
You can see their faith. Still feel like there's a level
of what I want to say there. Jen.
It's not as I don't know how to put it when it comes to like
psychology and shit. I think being behind a camera
even though you can see someone, it's far easier to behave in
whatever manner you want, instead of being true in the
moment, Tell that to my only fans.
I'm just, I'm just kidding. I'm sorry.
Okay, trying to connect that your car broke down?
Oh, if I was a chick, I'd have it, only fans.
Come in to be a whore, the here. From what I see of the Simpson
on Reddit apparently really good fucking money.
Yeah. Fallback plan for sure.
Why not side hustle? You could you could use your
Alter Ego of Me. Mama I need a manager.
I got you good to know, let you know.
If I ever reach that point, I almost quit when I was a
waitress and went and stripped instead but It didn't quite
happen. Fun fact.
Restaurant life is ass, it's crispy.
Sounds like a lot of hard work though like physical labor.
Here's a fun fact though. On average, the normal stripper
in Atlanta Georgia makes over 100k a year.
Yeah, but not start with, you're going to go strip.
I'd move on down to Atlanta. There's so many terrible things
about that statement. I mean I personally don't get
like guys that aren't going to get laid or played with.
When I go stare at titties they can't touch and throw money at
the titties. They can't touch.
You know, I don't get it either but I have titties and if they
want to give me money, you know, I think it gives them the sudden
open, is that an open offer it's easier than waiting tables,
that's for sure. A point given point and gives
people also the some people, the adrenaline rush you were talking
about earlier of walking through that abandoned house.
Yeah, that's true. Because you might not, you might
not be able to touch it but you might you might be able to touch
it you know you don't you don't you're not sure.
It's like where do shopping only it's Interactive?
Hey, if you do window shopping, it's also interactive.
This is true. This is true.
I mean I could just do that at Walmart.
Walk by like I like that one. I like that one.
Not that one. That one's okay.
How much are you going to? Yes.
There's late. I usually try to avoid the first
and last of the month, so I miss a lot of the Riff Raff.
But then again, I've seen lots of chicks with really nice hair
than like, I want to see the face and then it's a guy, and
I'm not sure if I'm gay or not. I didn't find him attractive but
his hair was nice. That's what guys.
Yeah no I'm glad guys with long hair started to take care of it.
Yeah I definitely didn't think it was the guy like it's so nice
it's so key conditioner. Conditioner is the secret guys.
It's not even that hard if the washout kind or the leave in
kind of wash out, okay. See it got complicated from oh
but you clarified. Thank you.
I mean either honestly, yeah. Also, I find it funny that too
short hair girls are talking about this.
Now Whoa. Whoa whoa.
I just cut the majority of mine off.
I had a ponytail for like had a haircut like a year.
The other day. I just went and chopped it all
off. How do you feel so much better?
It's nice. You feel liberated?
Yeah, yeah. How short, cut your hair off?
It was shorter length. It's now like you can see my
neck, the back of my neck for the first time in a year.
So it's really short. I'm glad it was a positive
experience for you. Yeah.
Good stuff. I feel bad for the lady that had
to clean up the hair because it looked like you just fucking
shaved a wookie. So much here on the ground.
Uh-huh. I was remembering.
It was Zola's that wasn't in this room, but it's actually
Mario. I was here last time.
Yeah, everyone, well you weren't here the time the for the good
campaign. So I think my brain interpreted
that as you're the one on the beach and not metal, someone
asked me today. What was going on in the D&D
campaign? And I was like, oh fuck.
I don't know. Let us recap because none of us
ever. Remember pretty sure he only
remembers because he listens to the Yeah, that's part of it for
sure. Then you write the summary is I
forgot that you wrote summaries until.
So my I fucked up about a week ago and deleted half of my hard
drive. Yeah.
And lost a bunch of stuff and, including all my bookmarks.
I had to read bookmark, astral. And I used to bookmark, it
straight to the campaign. And now, I bookmarked it to like
that home screen that shows all the like the chat, the
summaries, and I was like, cool shit.
There's a whole like written summary here.
I forgot about these. Yep.
Yeah, I've been slacking and I haven't done them the last like
four or five times because of holidays and grab but that's a
lot. Yeah it is.
And I mean I have it's super useful though when I come went
like what you're talking about, because what I do is I listened
to the recording and then I write that as I'm listening to
it, basically. And so that's what's been able
to remind me to create and do shit, like, the items that I
still haven't done for the first campaign or the good campaign.
Well, I I skimmed over a couple of their written beautifully.
They're not just like, and then this happened and then that
happened and they're like I mean you could probably put them all
together and maybe we should do that for you next year.
Put them all together and get them home makeup.
Look yeah I would Josh forget the last five minutes of
conversation. None of this happened.
I think I would still cry. That is they are there?
Written really well. They're fun to read.
Yep, we appreciate you DM. Thank you.
I appreciate you in that. I hope you appreciate this too
because what you guys were doing last time you were fulfilling a
contract with Tanaka who is Nobunaga as consort.
Inhale, apparently you find out who had been very friendly with
Ash and you guys had fallen into his confidence because of this a
little bit and he sent you on a mission to throw a wrench into
the works of Laos, who is a individual that spread cheer
during Yuletide and they wanted you to mess that up basically.
and, Considering the time frame of what had happened last time.
Which is you guys when he'd also, let you know, there was a
bar around and there was a beach rounding, guys, decided to go
down to the beach to wash off, some of your poop chute, which
you hadn't been able to 40, I don't even eat.
It's hard for you to even tell the time that's passed down in
The Labyrinth and all that such, but definitely been multiple
days. Maybe months and go ahead.
Did you just Say down in The Labyrinth.
Like as in we're not in The Labyrinth anymore you weren't
you are not currently but remember recall to that.
He said, as a little caveat to the mission that it would be
ended at a certain time, all right.
Because that's why I said I wanted to go on the mission
because it got us out of the labyrinth.
I was like, Hey guys let's get the fuck out of the labyrinth.
I regret that Parker are temporarily freed, you know, he
said that, who knows? It looks guy could be lying.
You could be probably an array, man, Manny, but could be, could
be an angel discuss in Why don't why don't we all roll a D20 for
those story times, to see who it is this week.
As I'm so excited. But you get dice for.
That is all. I'm getting down there.
I mean who do I have to beat? Well I'll swap you your for for
my to don't worry Ines I rolled a one roll it privately on
accidents Josh if you oh yeah seat up there whatever gonna
make them on private. Nope, I can only delete.
Like same thing for me. Yeah.
But it was probably, that's probably roll it, right?
They should be. I'll see what number is right?
I don't even know what I'm trying to avoid.
Exactly. I think I felt something
personal about my character. Yes, exactly.
Based upon a prompt. So, it's basically like your
characters in this instance, having a flashback to yourself.
PTSD but it's but it's supposed to help you with building your
back story. Gotcha.
So Do I have griselda's in there?
I haven't seen nor heard oh I see it.
Now 14 remind me Josh. Is that like if for example of
zeff character goes then does the griselda's character?
Sorry, I wasn't backwards. No, you did that.
You know, you did that exactly, right.
You. Because I was contemplating
that, that thing there, which is if zeff goes would when and how
would Griselda go? But if griselda's gone because
they'll do won't go again if that's what you're asking. so,
as a blush, Yeah, I thought we established once like the person
and I could be completely wrong, just pulling us out of thin air,
but I vaguely remember saying that.
Like once the person is gone, they're taken out of the thing
just so that everybody can get a chance.
And then, after that, everybody gets like after everybody's
gone, the pull starts again. I remember that as well.
Yeah, I think we're work. Best problem.
Also, maybe it's for the opposite character.
Like if you want the first time as like, if I want the first
time as Muriel, then our next like set of rules.
I would have to be as shh, right?
Yeah. So it takes you completely out
as me May for instance, but I was putting down a cool down
time, for opposing characters to so like if since, since you've
gone as mimei and that's just the last one I have in my notes
that swims. Referencing that you'd probably
wait like three times before you go as like three play sessions.
Yeah. Yeah.
Before you go as monix. That's just just so there's like
a little leaven because I'm not gonna like them.
I went last time so this is not I can't sit with you, not
wearing pink, I'm glad you. Give us the prompts and I
learned story because the I can't like the only story.
I can keep coming up with is both characters is like standing
in front of a reflecting pool with my wiener in between my
legs say, would you fuck me? I fuck that's that's the
problem. yeah, the prompts though are to
help you kind of break out of your thought, patterns a little
bit and create some sort of different Thought past basically
that's the only thought path. Oh shoot, well, I got my reason
now, I guess I'm going to change that.
Don't forget, I got chased by Bob.
Yeah, I do remember. I think it would do this
anymore. Well, on that note, I guess it's
perfect for this one that I have written down, what was the fake
answer? Your parents gave you?
When you ask them, where do babies come from?
So, like we have the babies come from the stork?
Yeah. Babies come from the orphanage
and that lie, it looks like falls upon.
You do ship their paranoia Chauvin are adopted.
Do I have time to come up all the water so improv right now?
Preferably we I'm preferable to the right now, but you have the
opportunity. I've left it opened that you can
wait. But recall, this does give you
an advantage for roles later. So the sooner you do it always
the better because now you have something called inspiration
which you can you can add to any role.
And it's just one D20 and whatever you roll.
You add it to that wherever you want it.
Super useful. I healed the fuck out of
somebody last session with my. Yeah, you did for that.
Can I can I can I say? It's not mine and I'm gonna give
you some time, if that. Can I give you some time?
Oh Sherman. Yeah, you're good.
Okay. One of my favorite things, like,
where babies come from like that?
My campaign came up with, is that Dragonborns come from
abandoned dragon eggs. So the dragon abandons it, no
dragonborns, take it in and then the raise it and because it's
like abandoned, then it turns into a dragon born because they
like takes on like the care that it has like around it.
It's just like one of my favorite things.
That's cute. I'd like to let it roll for a
little bit so I can come up with something good now recording
knocking Craig fuck you Craig but yeah that works perfectly
fine. I'll whenever you're ready then
you can you can tell your story and Get that inspiration die.
But as of right now, what is happening to everyone including
Mady and Warren, who Mario you? You're seeing something
completely different than your friends currently.
But over the torques, including not, not even you can hear it
Chauvin. Even though you're not wearing
one of these necklaces called a torque there, you can Here it
as, if it were like a speaker coming from the around your
friends, next in this room and basically, you're just hearing.
Many poulos is voice. You're recognizing and he's just
saying, haha. Whoa, looks like you're ready to
play ball. I'll get you back down to the
the rest of your friends now and you guys are going out of
existence from this false. We're done.
The floor was so cool there. Wait we didn't even get any
food. Yeah. oh, Manny Zapped us back,
you're still where you are Maddie, but you're noticing.
When that sound woke you up, because you fell asleep and out
in the colder Chambers and you're waking up on a beach or
like the fuck as well as you're hearing.
Manny's voice and you're like, hell you talking about and all
of your friends, start appearing around other than you'd seen
Warren, who was there, who wakes up at that time, too.
But immediately starts going over to the Cornered wall of
rock that looks like. The room is circled in and it
starts vomiting. What if I try to count nurse
pelvis, I'm not gonna do that. But what if I did, You cheer for
you? Yeah, you can send it to chat
but no. Okay.
But I could, yeah. That's that's my character.
If you if you depending upon the wording of it, it might work is
where I was going with what you could send it to chat but I'm
guessing not. I don't have it, okay?
Try to get everybody over to the map, is what I'm trying to think
about. Did we?
We were promised money, right? Oh yeah.
So, we should track down that payment but that we complete our
job. Sure, we just had to stop him
from spreading joy. We didn't have to do anything
else. What happened to the kid?
Re-injured know, he's dead. Everyone's dead.
That will never percussions. Now because we can't ever go
back, so we're stuck in this fucking Labyrinth.
No, Santa's Little Gnome bastard.
You guys stop Santa Claus. When I was gone, maybe we come.
There's a bunch of havoc in his Workshop.
I don't know if he stopped him. We murdered everyone.
I don't think we murdered everyone up him.
We're supposed to delay him right now.
I feel like holding his illegitimate, gnome son, and
Hostage, and killing a bun. How do we know he was?
I mean he was just making that up.
I don't think. Mrs. Claus is a gnome.
I'm just mad. I didn't get to lay eyes on the
big guy. I know.
Yeah. So his name was, Kay Laos.
Just so your friends are filling in what who they were trying to.
Foil plans, they're trying to foil.
Breaks into people's homes in the middle of the night.
Mhm. Yeah.
He's really. What's the, the one that starts
at the K in Germany, it's supposed to scare everybody.
Krampus Krampus. Krampus
Krampus Yeah, that sounds like more fun.
It's like screaming and crying, just whack him.
Upside the to shut up. Mmm-hmm hey just because that's
how we were treated. As children doesn't mean we need
to teach children. How many times my brothers told
me that both of my brothers have kids and like Olivia just
because your childhood was shit doesn't mean there's has to be
Remember that Ike? Honestly, most provocative
parents are usually, I mean I we're all speaking towards it,
although funny enough the topics to your mom's a special case
there. Josh well I was going to say, oh
yeah Joven is the only one that actually has kids in the bunch
of us here and yeah. Mom.
That's it. C.
As in yes. Oh it was so quick attack
tourist. You're not going to count our
pets. You don't think I count Zelda's
a child. Hmm.
I mean like I don't pass you don't want a better life than I
did. I don't think you don't but it's
a lot different because the the the ability for them to tell you
you're a shitty parent is not there other than with their with
their actions but it is I can show you the bite marks.
But yeah, you guys are it felt very similar to the times when
you would teleported before back to the room.
In The Labyrinth that many had been able to do, you'd be able
to do before with the flicking of your charm on your torques.
but you are at the beach again, where you were Sitting the new
spawn. Well, so what I mean?
If it's a sponge room, it's a shitty one.
Unless you think still. This was that a rock?
No, we're at the pool. We're in a tropical Paradise.
Yeah. I say Neal and we just hang out
in here stir and drink pina? Coladas for the rest of
Eternity. Roll an investigation.
If I can find it, it's not going to be very good one, I got 12.
L've. What are you?
What are you investigating? The pole, I want to know if
there's anything on the bottom. Oh, so you swim out to that
point and kind of feel the warm slightly lapping water, you're
not sure where the waves are coming from.
But the you're looking down through the crystal, clear
waters down to the bottom where your feet are and they're just
sunk probably up to your ankles in sand.
Of a very brilliant White. Alright, bet you.
This is a pull of manages it. I don't know.
You should try it. Is Mario logos and dips her
Pinky and taste it. And it tastes like a Briny
saltwater. Yeah Mama Mama just gonna look
at her and just like with disgust because you know Mommy
remembers everyone's covered in shit and got to the pool to
rinse off and Mario does not recall.
That is this pool? Yeah I did not know that special
case had his way with them but yeah, I saved them.
I never laughed so hard and as for an exit of the of the area,
it looks like through a Vine covered entry.
Just behind Griselda. There seems to be an exit.
Oh, there's a door. I'm not bitter.
Oh, this is behind me. I'm definitely.
Okay, staying in here. Wait.
So how did you guys get in here? We walked.
You walked in. I thought yes, I thought Manny
just zap you in Well, this time we got brought back but we don't
think it was Manny that brought us back.
I think it was that know someone the man was Manny, someone
discovered this room because like, I remember walking in, I
mean, again, my memory could be very faulty.
I remember walking in down here somewhere.
This was how we got in and out. This thing guy told us to go
through the cabinet together. The manager people asked I'll
shit because this is connected to where the Old.
The freezing cold room is where there's there.
Still some stairs over here guys.
On the other side of the room, we could try going down or up
also because those awkward more importantly I could die.
Okay. So Josh hats off is I could have
sworn, you said Manny but you might have said manager.
When where? about whose voice was coming
through the head, coming through the Pork that was his voice back
here. That's whose voice you recognize
coming through the door closed. Many polis.
Okay, so was Manny Za manager? Sent us away?
Yeah, correct and then man, he's like you're leaving and that's
not. Okay and so we brought you back
sorry said that in my voice. So yeah he said that and that's
a big fucking problem. Because that means we have to
solve. The maze.
We will never get out. Also too just in add into this
little thing Chauvin. Your you feel fully refreshed
after landing in the pool and as if you just taken a nice long
rest so you if if you have a button to click that if we done,
that should we longer rest guys, and I will go and just pull The
water skin fills up, no problem from it.
I maybe I mean it's up to you guys.
I'm missing one Health Point in one spell slot but we can just
jump in this pool. Yeah.
Hey guys, I'm pretty good in this pool.
Just be nice. Very relaxing.
Watch out. I'm gonna go back to the same
spot I was in last time and just kind of sit under the tree in
the corner here. Health.
Oh my God, nice. Mario's going to kind of sit in
the I guess in any type of like shallow and with her feet in the
pool, And she's kind of like clicker torque and go so many.
Can you please describe us. Why you brought this here?
Again. Well, hello them.
That is it seems we are on talking terms again, since
you've enough embraced, my manipulate manipulative ways.
I forgot haven't talked to him since we told him to go.
Fuck himself. Fuck you.
We're going to hell and then just March through, right?
Because he was like, you guys don't want to do that.
You don't want to do that. Don't go there.
I feel glad how did kid you not until anymore?
No, we definitely are. That's present over them.
I don't know like because we went through.
We were in the shadow realm where wherever and then now
we're here we weren't able to talk to Manny in hell.
I don't think. Manny, where are we?
You aren't in Hell. Indeed your dumb asses.
But you're still in hell. What do you mean got out?
Damn it. and I was pretty peeved by that notion, but I see that
you're moving along in your studies of We'll say nothing.
Why did you bring them back? Oh it was a Request from Tanaka.
You take requests from Tanaka. I took all sorts of requests
whether or not I actually do anything is completely
different. But I sort of liked you guys,
you're growing on me. So hats off is whose Tanaka,
it's the name of the guy that sent us a picture in the first
place. Yeah.
So why did the manager want you guys sent back?
Yes, but I was always up there that was always a part of the
plan. I thought, yeah, he was a way to
get out of the Maze and now send you.
We just had a temporary assignment to kill those.
Yeah, well, I won't agree to go. We wanted, we wanted at least I
wanted a chance to at least get out of the labyrinth, but we
always knew it was going to be temporary.
Yeah, I didn't think it was going to be that temporary
though. I figured we'd at least have
like, I don't know, 24 hours or something.
Oh yeah, we should go get our money.
Also should go to the manager and demand our money back but we
didn't pay anything, but he owes us money.
Yeah, we should go cause a scene we should.
I wish I had a due to waking my bag.
Here. Manny say that he takes
requests. Yep.
Anyone have a request. To go home.
Yeah. To get the hell out of here but
I took it out of my life. Could we get a jar of mayonnaise
for better sandwiches? He might grant that one.
He seems like the kind of guy that would have jars of
mayonnaise lying around and respect the sandwich for you.
Is this the one where I have a tiny Chef?
I think so. Yeah. the Chinese Chef might
have mayonnaise tiny man is Does the tiny Chef report prepared
regular sized food? I don't know, I haven't had got
to use them yet. It's the manager sister.
Somebody looks like the manager the tiny.
That's a slider versions of everything, isn't it?
I don't know. It doesn't have a name.
They just kind of not it. You you're not real sure.
What gender they are, but there's stand in the just next
to or in front of a bush. Have we seen them before they
look very similar to the secretary.
There's Tanaka dirty, mr. Tim Elsa, mr.
Tibbles tail. Shadow Seekers.
Feel like we need theme music early.
I was a cool white Under the pressure but you fucked shit up
good there. Yeah, but you will delay.
Laos and we didn't even get to Laos weirdly.
I've been informed by some very dead adversaries that they you'd
been able to murder a portion of his staff.
Did they tell you that? We murdered his wife?
What? No, no, no.
It's just gonna like smile and feel like yeah, yeah.
I think we I think we are and extra and is that was not on the
report that I received. Who wrote your report?
Well, it was some of my sources and I won't give them away.
He's petting mr. Tibbles, by the way, and I've
been playing with Hrithik tables before you walked in just with a
piece of yarn or something. Okay?
Well, I don't know who's doing it, but rolling it, well not
that. The manipulation.
It's not that persuasion or deception, deception.
Oh, I could do deception. Allow me to be both rolling or
just one. What would someone like
guidance? Who's rolling?
I was going to give you a plus to, to your role.
Okay, just one of us. Josh her we are we in this
together. It seems like it was your idea
there, but I'm not sure if you I got a 19.
That's two. 3021. Wait, perception.
What was I really deception? Sorry.
With a d. And he looks you guys up and
down and he's like Well, I'm not here too.
Assess sort such things. I mean, if you if you wish a
bonus you throw a big enough wrench in the works for us.
So how does 100 100 extra gold sound?
You guys think? You think that's enough for all
of the misfortunate? We carried out.
It doesn't mean, I don't know, we're going to spend it at down
here. Yeah, I don't know what that
gets me in. Hell he hears that and he says,
oh you must go to the bar. It is is lovely.
How much is a drink at the bar? I like you.
Want to go? No, not even.
It's probably about it. Well, it's hard to say, with
that bartender. But usually, I'm just so that,
you know, have and have good bargaining ground to work on.
I'll give you my price that he gives me.
And it's it's it's about one silver per high, top shelf.
Spaghetti sauce. Even heard of that drink before.
It's a specialty. All right, I'm okay with 100
gold on top of our original payment, correct.
Yes honest. Of course, big one.
I just imagined mommy standing there and just going hey he
stops petting. Mr. Tibbles and walks back this
way. Towards his desk.
See him walk back around. Pull out a small chest walk back
out. And we'll I think you're going
to be the one to have to hold this one and let go big one.
Also, you're the closest. Yeah, it looks like right now.
It's about the size of about a foot.
By two feet. It is like a really strong
biceps ripping through his shirt.
No, it does not appear so it's always handing it towards you
Mommy. Okay, then take it with both
hands. So at this has my payment or
everybody's payment. That is everyone's payment as he
says as he lets go in the Box resizes to about four times its
size. In your hands and you feel the
heft Ring of resizing feel the heft in your hands of your
pretty sure. And if not, then that's got to
be some massive amounts of lead or something in here because
it's It's pretty heavy. So I don't trust this shaft e
bastard. I'm gonna set it down on the
floor and open it and look inside.
As soon as you start to crack the lid, you see The Gleam of
gold underneath? And if Warren were here, you are
sure. He would be.
Yeah. Hey, Jackie leading currently
just gonna say, it's probably good thing when it's not here.
All right, cool beans. How do you do that thing with
the chest? Oh, you may have heard something
of some of a ring. Called that of ring, a
reasonable size. You okay?
How much for that ring? This ring.
Well, I might have another, I had gone in requested some for
some dryads and they're probably in another shipment.
Well, I have one other, I know for sure just as you know, the
backup got to keep that replacement just in case just to
get shit on my desk in case but I'd be willing to let it go for
a cool 1500. 1500 copper cool. Madam.
How much was the original payment, not that much?
I don't think it was exactly that much, he knows it.
You see the 12 1500. So we each got 1,600 gold from
this. Trip North wait.
Wait, how much do we each get? 1600.
I don't hear anyone shooting that down for Drew, and I'm
getting rich. You are, I'm not sure who's
passing it out. But Mom, a does have the box.
Yeah, we're said I don't know if we want to do this in front of
Tanaka or if you guys want to go like discreetly somewhere else
or if you guys want to come up and collect your gold.
It's I mean it's here I'm looking to get my hold out your
hand now he knows how much we So am I grabbing this man?
Were you going to give it to me? You take it.
I'm not responsible for how much you get or don't get.
I'm sorry. What was that?
I'm not responsible for anybody else.
I have taken my portion and you are responsible for yours.
Just because he gave it to me, doesn't mean I'm a money like
the money person, So visibly, it looks like everyone's just
crowding around this open chest that you've set down in front of
him who Tanaka's seems that your content currently in his
petting. His Manticore yet again, I'm
grabbing my 1600. And then running backs like a
little Gollum from The Ring. O Lord of the Rings my corner
again. You here, snickering and
happiness. Hot sauce is that's not for
Muriel and Warren, right? Oh yeah, there it is.
There, you know? But as for the shadow Seekers,
there is enough for each one of you.
As to what you're working as your canting mommy.
So there is enough here, I'm taking I'm taking 2012.
No. Why they're not here.
It's is why I'm not in charge. You don't just get a backup
after I show, you don't even want to acknowledge.
That you're part of our group and now you're trying to take
stuff from other members of our group that were specifically
gifted to our group. So it's fine.
I'm like the strongest person here.
It's fine. Charles strongest person here
I'm going to look up at mommy. Yep.
Me like like you heard what he just said, right?
Yeah. That's be like well you know
technically I should get an extra bonus because the only
reason we fuck shit up was because I started killing
people. Yeah.
But I didn't start killing people.
Y'all wouldn't have done shit. Yeah, but the fight with the
secretary and you're like, oh yeah, like this guy that was me.
They were saying that to me. Doesn't mean you can have extra
money if anybody's getting extra money.
It's me who's two people here. So I get a little bit.
You a little bit. I'm not asking, I'm not trying
to take someone else's whole share.
I'm just taking a little bit more. you can have their
bonuses, you can have 200 extra, not 400 extra here, over the
deal with that over the torque arm, wrestle arm wrestle arm
wrestle, Yeah, they're not here. I can let their bonuses past,
you know, because they're not here, but you can't take their
share. Love to see a mom.
A I'm armed. I know I'm ready.
I'm getting ready to place a bed.
So - all right, Maybe at the at the pub you here tonight you
hear Tanaka in the back to say they would love that at the pub.
You might be able to get an admirable share from some bets
up there. Also, she let me take the 200.
I'll be more than happy to do a show of sportsmanship with you.
All right, first rounds on how tall is on?
He's definitely taller than me. I don't think so.
It's Mommy, seven feet. I think either we're going to be
either. You're going to be a little bit
taller than me or we're good. I am I'm seven.
Yeah, I'm setting a half feet tall.
Yeah, I'm seven feet 300 pounds. I am seven and a half feet tall
and I weigh 406 pounds. Yeah.
But there's are bigger. Just a wee bit.
It really threw me for a loop. So I didn't realize it was a
class. And we kept saying bugbear kept
thinking of like the insect, the like indestructible insect that
can like live in space. Originally, they were monsters
and then in one of the books, they We're just like oh you know
we're going to make this a playable class or playable race.
Yeah, that's cool. And if there is God, everything,
I think there's a new book with the dragons.
There are chromatic. Dragon board now and they are
badasses. Yeah, there's crystal dragons
right up badass and the crystal dragons like the new dragonborns
they added are fuckin sweet. So are you guys like what are
you doing with this chest? I took my I took my gold.
Yeah, I do pleasure. I'm out.
What is the chest look? Like it is a wood and iron bound
chest. Looks of a standard.
Make Once the gold is gone, there's nothing in it there.
As far as I understood, the they're still the shares of the
rest of the party in it. But There.
It does not look like there's anything else in it besides
gold. We made me go instead of trying
to Lug this thing around. Would you be able to carry it
back to the pool and leave it with them?
Yeah, sure. Just that way.
We're not trying to drag it to the bag of gold around.
Yeah, so I'm assuming it's much lighter now.
That one, too. Sorry.
Does Sasha get a share of gold. One, two, three, four, five
people, six people have taken gold.
I think that was asked, I mean, These.
Technically a member. Yeah, I think that was asked
before and I think the the assertion was yes, but pocket
for sure then to yes. Yeah.
I I will hold on, Bob's gonna spend it all on strippers.
Okay, so the trust is much lighter, so I'm assuming you
have even though it's big, it's much easier to carry, hmm.
Okay, so yeah, I'm going to carry it back to the place.
Intentions of returning because I don't know if we're still
talking to Tanaka right now. It's figure out where the hell
the bar is. We've been to this bar before,
right? But I don't think so.
Well, the different one. I mean, are you talking about
the bar in Hell? Or are you talking about the bar
in the sewers? I don't think we went to a bar
and he'll we definitely want to the one in the sewers.
The only one we've got into, so Manny Manny I add.
Are you taking requests? What is it?
We want to go to the bar. Oh you can just go up the stairs
behind the bush. They aren't we going to the bar
right here? Tanaka was talking about.
These these this bush stairs there, there, stairs over here.
I still want to go up these stairs.
Real bad, guys, these ones. Those are the stairs.
You'd gone up to get to the surface.
Yep. And as you look up them, it
looks as if there is a solid ceiling above them, mommy on
that. Okay.
Yeah, there's no stairs. Oh look.
Look lo and behold. What are these things?
Wait, was that guy still there? So he looks like he's going to
the same place you are and he just kind of walks up the steps
following you. But as you, I want to
investigate little statues. Wait does he look like he's
threatening or no? He just looks like he I mean he
looks threatening just because he he's a ice demon devil of
sorts and he's very, very pointy.
Yeah. But as But does he look like
he's like following us or like keeping an eye on us?
No actually you guys look like you're following him up the
stairs. and, Has an explanation for your investigation.
Mom, a what? Did you roll?
A 10. You are looking at these.
They don't look like metal. They are of a stone work but
they are oddly golden in their appearance as well as the walls
themselves have a golden Stone appearances.
It's if this chamber had been Carved by somebody out of a
really nice Stone of sorts. Even the statues themselves, but
they are both of horned devil looking creatures with axes.
They're holding axes. They are holding X's are these
carved. Stone axes, or these like axes
axes appear to be carved Stone. Axes.
Are they detachable like those the spider legs were on that
other Statue thing. I'm assuming are putting
detachable in quotes because if I recall correctly, you ripped
that statue leg off tomorrow. They came off that's detachable
Mom, I made a detachable. Are these access attachable
looks like that was not what they intended them for but Can I
try? No one ever said that you
couldn't roll to recap saving strength, just regular strength,
strength modifier, looking at the wrong thing, 15 plus, Fort
19. So, you know, I don't know why
it's not pulling up in a stroll, but it's in D&D Beyond grab-ass
in the Rope. I believe you at the wrist of
the statue, you intending to kind of keep for the most part
intact, and you just crush the wrist and it basically falls to
the floor with a solid Stone, Axe, and the wrist and hand
attached to it. Shit.
Um, well. I'm going to pick the acts up
and stick it in my belt loop and Carry On It drag and pull on the
floor because it is like a poll tax mind you.
The thing is it hmm about six foot long shaft.
I'm gonna try something break, so easily.
I'm going to try to break off like the last foot.
Okay of it. Roll a dexterity check.
So so cool. Oh, damn it to you.
Grab for the end or what are you doing?
What are you? What are you doing?
I'm assuming, like holding it, have you ever tried to like step
on a stick? To break it in half.
Okay. I'm trying.
I'm holding it like I did that once and it went into my leg.
So be careful. Mommy.
Don't get the DM ideas holding it.
I'm just gonna Kick it and try to like you know, I'm just
trying to knock off like a foot or two from the bottom so I can
carry it around easier. So you Kick towards the bottom
of it. Try to kick off a foot or two
and you when you step on it it actually breaks in a place that
you weren't expecting slightly farther down than what you were
expecting and the stone stone below.
That doesn't Crush like the other one and the As opposed to
snapping almost like, rigid granite. but what is the and
effect you end up with a instead of a six-foot long shaft, you
end up with a Four foot long shaft okay that works not the
worst, not what I was hoping for but not the worst.
Did it look like bats could have lived in that chamber?
- okay. Moving on.
Chamber. Yeah, it was pretty right.
What If I got everybody, trying to look through a cat except for
me, I think I tried to just place you at least that's all
Darkness over here. We tried to me.
Or did we just walk into a bar full of cultist?
I can tell just by looking at them.
They got 205 it up. Especially the glasses were in
the blue sweater. He's evil shit.
Yeah, yeah. Dude, in Breaking Bad.
That owns the chicken restaurant.
Mmm, Yeah. The name of the day.
Knitting of, yeah. All right guys, let's do this
again. Count on 3 1 2 3. 1, 2 n.
What does it look like? Oh, I'm still in the darkness.
Does it look like they're doing some kind of ritual you making
it? Are?
They having a normal meal? They're eating apples.
That's why they have denies. You just can't see the efforts.
They sure they are eating a normal meal.
It looks like for the most part but silently with their heads
down and their their their hoods are up except for one of them,
totally normal. Let's shit looks like a
blond-haired blue-eyed. I'd female White Dragon. they're
like eating off of their knives, like And then call 26 didn't
wear pink, but day so it was not invited.
That one does appear to be reading quietly in front of the
fire. They're just anti-social. what's
ice devil up to the one at the bar seems to be leaning against
it heavily and drinking. The one that we followed.
Yes, he went straight up to the bar and started ordering and got
a drink pretty quickly and trouble real trouble in Paradise
straight up to the bar and orders.
What or what do you say? I would like, You have like a
twelve percent beer or a good vintage spoiled grape.
You don't that, that you hear a, not very much Tracy, a little
skittering on the other side and you see two pointy ears Over the
Bar and then hear them walking up a set of little stairs.
It looks like, it sounds like and standing at the top as it
just a shoulder and heads above the bar of a goblin.
And it goes, Fermented grapes. You think we have that in?
Hell, we do. What do you want?
I would like your second shelf. Fermented Greek.
Oh, okay. Well, that's going to be at
least two silver. It's important, you know?
I gave him three silver and I wink say last one's for you.
And the Mario voice because I keep forgetting to do the Mario
voice. Sorry.
Oh, we got a nice one in her. What is this?
And you swipe the gold or the silver and starts walking off.
And Into the other room sounds like something Shufflin.
Mama's gonna walk up to the bar. Waiting for somebody to come
back, okay? And he comes skittering out and
hardly up the the little stepladder and sets, like a nice
glass down on the table. Looks like a ice almost, not
even actual glass and pours a red.
Almost Rose a looking color into a glass from a green bottle.
Grab it yours him. And Take a nice, big old gulp.
when I start pouring Merit or mom is going to scream over
shots, I, what shots? How many?
Yes. 1 2 3, 4 5. Six.
None 6. How many are here?
Bumble close. Yeah, seven around for the Run
for the whole bar shots are friends.
We got some Big Spenders, your guys What do you like?
This is the best voice yet. What if we got?
What are my choices? I can suggest a Real nice,
though. Mammoths milk frozen and
fermented over decades Millennia actually.
No, thank you. I'll get you fucked up, though.
What else you got? Not that much.
This is probably the team of shit, you get.
I mean, do you have any like, you know, clear Liquors, dark
Liquors and I pull out of the second deed, it comes out clear.
Favorite auntie, I'm lactose intolerant.
I can't do the mammoths milk. Oh out of that 40 that ones that
lack T 3. I don't understand why you just
don't do. You just do second teeth, just a
second feet. What is it?
What what kind of beer ill or regular?
You're gonna do a shot of beer? I'm gonna do a glass of beer
will do a round of beers. Oh, shots obviously are not a
good idea. I would have mammoths milk heads
down. Nothing for me, please.
Would you have any meat? Actually, a Meade will shoot
fresh. In the next movie from, I
believe it was one of our cohorts.
That's was up in the else's territory.
All right, I'll take some need and you can give me the whoever
here once Meade. I'll think of me.
Were these people that the bartender hates?
Would you like to open up to him then?
Sure. Alright, that you said for
everyone from here, let's do what to do with 10 for now.
Den gold. That'll cover everyone here.
Okay, mommy gives them tentacle. Muriel Downs, the rest of her
drink and I'll get them. Mammoths milk shop police
Constitution by the way. Oh yeah, I need the Constitution
right up and he runs across it. And you see what looks like
frozen icicles out of coming out of the wall.
And he just grabs one. It starts massaging it until it
starts to move in less than a nice fashion and liquid starts
coming out. I don't cancel my mammoth.
And are you saying that as loud as you can and assessing?
Yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't want it.
No good. But if I already got a second,
one port, here was drinking the second one, okay?
You feel a perfectly fine after your wine, their mom?
Marion and Mama, your beer was also treating you good. he comes
out, he just Sets down the two glass shot glasses.
One in front of Matt. I don't want and are both in
front of medical now. What comes out of the 3rd teeth?
Oh, that's a we generally her just refer to it as a tequila.
Okay. That's what we should be
drinking Heat at each Q. Yeah.
Well why didn't you say that?
You didn't ask you. That's what everyone in this bar
wants. Yes.
Shots of tequila. Tequila shots of tequila for
everyone. I Zola's made like a wide Arc to
get to the bar. Looking at all these people, and
does she notice anything weird about cultist 7?
I want an inside, check on that guy.
He's got yeah, that's what I'm gonna like this lying around but
like I want to know what that guys doing.
Wait. Joven, you're not up, here are,
you know, you're over here, you're all the way over here.
Okay, just check it. I was like, I was like real
concern for a thing. You've haven't been able to see
any of this, and I was like, oh man, anyways.
You can roll your Insight check, but if you're taking those
shots, Mario you'll have to roll again for me of the mammoths
milk. I don't know this shit.
He just looks like a dude. So and so.
Yep, very well-groomed, dude. Might even be more weird that
he's well groomed and hell. So I'm going to take my shot of
tequila and I'm going to ask for another one.
I got a 13 Constitution this time and I'm going to carry it
over to culture seven. The extra shot actually extra
to. I'm going to take one with him.
I currently have my made. You do.
Okay. Well drink it.
That's a constitution that 20th. My insight check of called the
seven. All right, for your reference
Chauvin I know. Everyone else is probably not
quite referencing this either, but this is what I reference in
the pins on Discord. There is a how to get drunk.
Trying to find it again myself. It's just down from the text
voice. I need to take some of those out
because we don't have those anymore.
Yeah, the bot stopped working remember.
I would love to hear some of those sounds again, tell me how
to get drunk. Okay, good, taco bell bell.
Mmm. Taco Bell.
I do too. I want to talk about a hot
second. Heaven either.
Guys were all just going to go to Taco Bell.
Why didn't I bring talk about a Halloween fucked up?
Did their breakfast is amazing if anybody had Taco Bell's
breakfast. The, the Crunchwrap breakfast
version. Oh my God.
It wins like fuck every other breakfast ever.
What? Wait, what's in it?
There's a, there's a hash brown and if you add a hash brown to
any breakfast sandwich, instantly becomes fucking
better. Like you're not as fine sir.
Taco Bell. so cheese Chauvin, the probably
some refried beans flavors, you're feeling dance across your
tongue or that of a Christmassy Honey flavor, basically mentor
and you do feel it, going straight to your head and
getting a little tipsy. Yeah, I'm a cheap drunk. so you,
you tip another gold to the bartender, that's up to your 11
but you're giving you got your two shots to kill two shots of
to two extra shots. I did want, it's what I've
brought the Constitution for again and then I wanted to
extracts and taken 12 koltes number seven.
Okay. So you'd gotten a three?
Yeah that'll do. Yeah.
But somebody rolled a natural 20 on their Insight check and cop
Cultus number seven. They did is all this sitting
there. Side-eyeing the hell out of
colchis number 7 as Mom is walking up to him.
Is looking at Koltes number 7 in realizing something, besides
their off-putting nature in the context of the situation you're
realizing. There's some maybe some magical
aspects to what they actually are that.
Don't look like what they do or what they actually are.
He's what he's a fairy. He's The fed, he's the deceptor.
I had to describe your teeth and you decide i t Kela.
You it had surprisingly aspects of a creamy soda. but with the
punch of a Hardy tequila, It's okay.
What, what color is it? What consistency it is, clear,
but it is got some bubbles to it.
The thick it is not. Okay.
Fix most people would describe it, but it might be viscous and
you're not surprised. This is not Kurt old.
I mean a milk and this high of alcohol content should kurtal,
but it doesn't, it is so cool. Josh do either Roll Another
Constitution before slamming back.
Two more shots. Yes.
Yeah, because you got nay and 12 for the wine, right?
And I didn't see any other past that.
There's another 12 loaded. I just kidding.
I don't know how many men, there's a.
Remember the wine one of the twelve?
The original 12 was for the wind?
Is it? That s 12 is should do shots a
minute? Yeah.
Oh, I guess one is. You know, I can give me another.
Well, did you get a shot of tequila?
Oh, I did. Okay.
So then that's my shot of tequila or meat, or whatever you
want. Yeah, I'll get a team Kayla to
yeah. So, so, Mom is gonna take this
shot over to colchis. Number seven, set it down on the
table and be like, good evening, sir.
Would you and the spirit of camaraderie, like a shot of
tequila? Would you take a shot with me?
Why hello there. Um, I don't think I'm to be be
partaking in that. I'm just here for the food and
ambience. and Ariel kind of comes and sees that you know,
her friends are around this table and she stumbles over and
kind of bumped into the table and slams down her teeth Kela
and is like come on, you want to and I believe If I am, you never
told me what state I'm in, you are Tipsy at the very least
currently, okay? Um, and do I get?
Cuz I know if you're drunk, you get an addition to Charisma.
Am I crazy? No I was just looking at it it's
the yeah. You know you do have an
advantage on Charisma based checks currently at Tipsy it's
buzzed that has strength is what I was thinking about string
Soul. That's weird.
So I guess that's a persuasion holy.
Fuck balls. I have a plus. 82 translation.
Good. What's good called is number
seven fucked up. I just got a natural 20 plus 8.
So that's a 20 and he just stares at you down
at the drink and sets down his knitting needles and goes, well,
I guess it wouldn't hurt to have a good time.
And he reaches over and takes the shot like, like, like he
does it every day. What can you describe?
What cultists seven looks like besides, is he no little chair.
No, he's like leg cross, like, yeah, it's legs are crossed in
the chair. He's got a blue vest on.
It's got a low rimmed glasses and Cute little button nose.
Yep. And a but yes evil radiating off
of him. I got bad vibes are good sir.
What brings you here today? Oh, like I'd said, it was the
ambience but to my name, it's it's Tim Tim.
Tim, I could fuck with that name and then Mario kind of like
gives her gifts the go. Goblin bartender like that 3,
more kind of Off to the side. Yeah.
Hey, I guess I do have a Tab Key.
I'd be careful Mister with Tim because if he's giving off.
Mr. Roger Vibes, mr. Rogers was a sniper in the
military. Is he?
Yeah, he wore long fucking love because he used to tattoo like
the confirmed kills he got. No, no way.
I know Miss the Colts. Let's see mr.
Rogers from Pittsburgh? Yes.
Yeah. That's Mister, Rogers
Neighborhood. We talked about the peasant
tunic was. Mcfeely Fred.
Mcfeely Rogers. His first name was okay.
It must have been a rumor that. Yeah, I was in the Marines and
he was in Vietnam. He was a pilot.
Yeah. Yeah, I don't think.
Mr. Rogers was ever in the military?
No, he wants them. All right that must have just
been a rumor. I heard that but I know that
Rogers was Bob Ross. Yeah, yeah.
Bob Ross is here. You can see it if you if you
watch the painting you can like because it's the hand he uses to
hold the easel. He's missing a thumb.
Okay. And in that time to the goblin,
ran around the bar and Brandon sitting down the three requested
shots. Is that Tim's Constitution
saved? Yeah, that was in that 20.
Oh my God, he is the devil. I think he is the devil.
That's the vibe. I'm getting.
No, it's a, it's a plus 0. Well, I mean, I don't know if
there's worse things you can do, besides buying the devil shots,
right now, we're just having fun.
I mean, there's nothing else to do in this.
Cloyce. I'm gonna I'm gonna ask Altis
number Tim, I guess. Now if he comes here often, Oh,
um, well, pretty much every Tuesday.
They should be having a trivia night here soon.
No, we should occupation.
Well, I am in the flay and play Department.
You just kind of It's a play and play.
Yeah, he go fucking torture. Oh God try is knitting needle.
I put that as a I took it as a Sex Dungeon.
But okay torture, yes. Okay, go ahead and hand I guess
that's how Don't think I'm not going to get any closer than
where I'm at. I'm not feeling the situation
assuming said. I'm like I don't know.
Most of that was out loud. He just says huh well yeah most
do take not so kindly to the Department.
Mickey Mouse laugh. He's a torturer, it's even
worse. Does he smell of blood?
He does not. Okay, he showers and he's all
clean. You have to be cleaned.
Every endless 6 margin business. God well, so be it, but being a
bug in a do I get like a neat? Like, can I get like, any weird
animal Instinct off him like being a fucking, a bear?
You can speak the bees beasts. Oh
She really there just to have, you know, taking the Ambiance.
Is he gonna you a problem? In your sort of animalistic
assessment. I would say that you were just
two from the situation, our little put off, more than put
off from this gentleman, but I wouldn't say Alpha level
Predator like he's not putting off of those vibes, definitely,
some sort of Hunter of sorts though.
I'm just gonna stay where I'm at and just kind of keep a close
eye on them. And just listen, Tim what else
is there to do around here? We seemed kind of stuck here and
we're getting We could use some new scenery.
Stuck, you say. Well, it does kind of tend to
feel like that down in Hell. Well, new scenery, hmm.
Have you gone to the? Both of you up presuming, you've
gone from the first level to where we are now, which is
approximately somewhere in between the 6th, and 5th,
somewhere, in that range. It's kind of Odd.
This place in particular because it's where everyone comes to
gather in the Realms of hell here. but, There's some there's
some darker deeper things. If you enter that in the lower
circle is how many rooms are there.
All those probably about 13 13. What's up, higher?
Oh, that's Right now, I think it's ruled pretty much by the
bye. The demon far as But for short,
most people call them that behind his back.
Anyways. He doesn't like that.
No, he's a bit more. Hmm.
Traditional. Yeah, we'll see.
Wait, what was his name of food? Just grass like Franz Ferdinand.
I guess, that's France. Whatever.
So, how do you get from one room to the other?
Oh me in particular or um huh and he pulls out a cube that of
A multi-faceted Sort and not so not exactly the shape of a cube,
more of a, like a 13 sided shape, with multi colors on it.
And Hold it up to the light and it kind of reflects as if it
were a metallic sort and he says, well you just need one of
these Keys here to Traverse The Plains of hell.
It's kind of a, any just spins his hand around real quick.
Like he's solving a Rubik's Cube for The Meta purposes there.
But, and I'm Unsolved it. So, now there's colors
everywhere on it, each side of it.
And once you've done that, now you just need to solve it again
and press the side you want. Oh my God, I try and steal it
from his hand with yes. If I was going to try to steal
it, would it be sleight-of-hand, stealth Athletics. it would be a
You guys are so nice textures about to just chop his head off.
Okay, I'll stay. Cuz if I fail, I feel like we
should always dog pile on top of him and take it after he
suffered. I didn't welcome glad to meet
its its dexterity related. I was just trying to go to it to
remember, it's like it'd be a slight of hand.
That's what it what they call it.
I mean, I'm willing to let see a try with the Mage hand.
Do we want to roll to see? Who would react first?
Because I feel like we both heard that we're just like,
okay, that's it. Alice.
Yeah, we just want to if we see it and he told us how to use it,
we just both want to take it now.
Yeah, I'm okay with rolling for that.
You'd both roll a sleight of hand.
Well, not good. Seven.
Mom is faster than me. Very surprising.
Which no, I don't exercise much. Yep, it's bitchin.
What if I rolled? Afford a hit.
What? Hmm, a 24, to hit Isis.
What are you hitting? Hm, with my mom, before we start
this. I just want to clarify.
Did he say? Did he say that?
Braz is on 13. Hmm.
Yes, okay. But where are you, aiming?
Just for my Um I'm aiming for his head is the cube 13 sided.
Roll your damage. It is 13 sided.
Oh I want to know what that's called.
It's not a cube. Right.
I said Cube and then felt them
it's like yeah. I bet the internet.
Tell me immediately Pride decagon.
That's what I was just about to say hello.
Try decagon. Really.
Hello? Eight points of damage.
Well, you're right. Your robot in hard just FYI.
Your phone. She's on the phone.
Yeah. That's what I was getting to is
that. It's she's gotten off but try
Decker gone. So yeah, it's a try decagon.
Mommy has it and Tim's heads explodes?
And I grabbed the cube. What do the mommy?
Mommy has grabbed it? It seems like because at the
time that you were bursting, Tim's, head, Mame and Solace
were rolling, mom and got a 12, Tim got a six and Zola's got a
seven. That's a shame.
Probably, didn't you kill him? Nope.
Oh well, no one else in the bar seems perturbed other than the
goblin who hops up on the counter and goes, who's gonna
clean this mess up. I take his second shot.
Roll constitution. Does anybody have that
precipitation first oh, Prestidigitation.
Yes. Yes.
Was that just me or did everybody's Discord just died?
That's just you just me. Okay.
My disc or died for like a minute.
Anyway, we heard you saying hello.
We thought you just got a phone call or something.
No! - Court was blank!
It showed nothing! Well you have to try decagon as
a clarification. Tim's head a decagon.
Fuck yeah. Tim's, head exploded dead. and I
know one Solace and I go this woman can can clean it up for
you and I always always and I snap my fingers and Point to
the. Well, I feel demeaned.
Is that the right word? Welcome to hell.
And I slap her back. Not her ass.
I, Might attack you even Muriel's height.
It definitely would be Herrera. Yeah, back I think I'm gonna try
to go for her back but then got her ass and wasn't disappointed.
Great I have the urge to hellish rebuke you but I mean You were
in hell when in hell, what's what's up?
When and he'll attack your friends?
Let me know what time he'll start.
Yeah, I'm doing it. I'm starting a bar fight.
I can do that one all the time now. anytime somebody attacks,
you Oh shit. I don't know how many attacker
it's all in the perception. This is big damage.
She's just angry at me. For demeaning her.
I definitely did not attack her. Damaged you and momentary
momentarily surrounded by hellish Flames doesn't say
attack. Wait.
It doesn't have any type of like Armor class hit.
It's a reaction. No, I don't know.
I guess whatever Josh says goes because it's a reaction to
being. Yeah, this is Squall has this
one, too. And it does not have an armor
class rating. It, it's basically, if I
remember correctly. It's yeah, it says, whichever
what you take in response to being damaged by creature within
60 feet of you that you can see Okay, so I probably wasn't
damaged. Anyway.
I was going to say, rule like a D4 Mattia because it is a slap.
Is this a? Is this a ranged weapon attack
by chance? No, it is not a weapon.
It's a spell. Hey, guys, anybody want to take
a crack at solving this. What you call it?
Josh, try decagon. Try decagon.
I'm gonna walk around the table and sit at this chair and just
like look over at the tension between Mario and Solace and
then look at Mom and be like, yeah, I'll try and I get wait, I
won't bump move I watch. Watched him do it.
Also put it down slowly. Roll your diamond.
Oh oh okay. So you do see Flames come up
around you while you're speaking Mario and just across to your
Hand outstretched hand. Totally her.
Did I say he's are eyebrows. Yeah, basically that's where I
was saying to really your damage medal for that.
Slab of a D4, you only get three from 2D 10.
Know I got 16. She got three know.
Wait, so then that's a hmm. So, it doesn't three.
Where do I get the three from you?
Rolled a 3 out of 4, right? Yeah.
Okay. I missed that.
I take three. Okay.
Hmm. So you're saying though, as the
Flames kind of recede down below, are you around the floor?
Leaving our nice ring around you?
Maddie. Okay.
I know distracted. You All right, and I mean I
already have my battle hammer in my hand.
I'm gonna go. I'm going to swing at her and my
picks up the try decagon and hands it to Griselda.
Did a bar fight. I'm gonna look go over this.
Can I do an Arcane check on it? Yep.
Check on it. What is ice devil doing?
So he's not doing anything. Don't worry about that, I'm
making an ash making a national goal in mind.
Because it looks cool. 20 hits, because why wouldn't it?
25. So you're not using like a
detect magic or anything like that, right?
No, I just was doing in our comment.
Check to see if there was any like, look over it.
See if there's any like runes or anything specific on it?
That says like as you're using this.
You have to say this or like any sort of magical properties to
get it to work. There does not seem to be any
explicit explanation on any part of it.
It is Merely just multi-faceted colors strewn about these 13
faces. But for the Arcana that you
rolled, you sense an immense amount of power residing in it,
somehow it does seem to be of like a very well worked metal.
And you're guessing The colors actually come from, it seems
like a melted Gem of some sort because they are perfectly
formed okay? But I don't get any sense of how
it works from that, okay? Can I do an investigation?
Yes on it, see how it works. That's a 23.
Nice roll. Are you doing anything to
Mariel? Zealous after we trust.
I don't know what you're where. You're striking metal butt.
With a hammer shoulder. Okay.
Yeah, that that definitely hits and I cook the nine points.
Mmm. Yes, I I'm gonna cast command.
I'm going to point at the table, I'm going to say clean that.
Clean. I guess what you're doing?
Yeah. You have to make a wisdom save
15. You've also drawn the attention
of everyone else at the bar at this point, good seeming to pay
be as well as not at the bar. Other than the person reading.
A book at the fire. Everyone seems to have turned
off seeming. Exploding head.
Didn't catch their attention, but the command did not never
fight. I guess it's a bar fight.
Say really the command, but the back and forth is what other
figure. I got a 16.
Then you don't have to clean it. Maybe you all should claim and
Merry Old grabs her. Mom is gonna stand up and walk
over and gonna pick each one of these people up by the Scruff of
their necks for the clothing behind their neck and hold them
both up. Check.
I will start just like flapping wildly at the air, with my
knees. Hey, I'm going to be like going
at her. It's a it depends on what you're
trying to do, the acrobatics would be to get away if that's
what you're trying to do. Know if she's able to pick us up
in our later. Older Picks Them Up.
Roll brawling. Yeah, because you guys are done
fighting going back and forth and that's a problem.
That's a hammer is the ball. Yeah, yeah, definitely.
So you you, you are walking up to them Mommy and trying to get
in between them. Presumably.
So that would be a bath low. Not in between them, I want it.
I'm just like, reaching down into I'm on the outside.
And I'm picking them both up and pulling them apart.
More or less. I was saying it's still be an
Athletics of sorts because you're trying to Boca pick both
of them up, in a show of stop being so Beauty.
It's a 15. You guys would roll off
depending upon what you're trying to do in response to
Mommy. A Is it what is it like 10 times
Muriel's? Height and weight?
Maybe not 10 times but at least a that was an exaggerated.
Yeah, at least three. Yeah.
But I mean I could I could kind of like roll out.
Yeah. You could run away real fast,
which was like, what? I was, yeah, which it was going
to say is more of the acrobatics instead of the Athletics in the
dexterity its element. All right, that's a 21.
Wow, I just let it happen, but I flip off Mario with my Mage and
so you feel like Grumpy's olace, like, crossing your fingers,
like giving the middle finger. Yep.
You duck under monell, mommy's outstretched hands to the one
that was proffered towards you pretty easily.
Mario, so you are free to move, but Zola's if you're currently
grappled by Mommy and held in there, Oh, as I see Mama,
struggling to like, grab these two and stop.
This, I'm gonna slam this thing that I have in my hand down at
the table, on the table. I'm going to look at Mario and
Solace. And I'm gonna cast blindness and
deafness on both of them drunk, a deaf and blind.
And for my verbal thing, I'm just gonna be like, would you
two just stop? Yeah, I failed five, Muriel and
Villas, are both deaf and blind. You cannot see.
No reason why. We can't have nice things.
Hear anything? You're just standing Mario
freely moving but it's always, you are grappled as well.
And therefore I'm to death. They're well, they're blinded.
It's one or the other only choose blind.
Oh, okay. I just seen a slash and zoomed
it was both Yeah, because there was no description added on to
it. Yeah.
Yeah, my mom is just going to say, this is why we can't have
nice things. We are in fucking hell.
What do you equate to the traveling tried to Kahan?
Why don't we try to figure out how to use it?
Why didn't someone get me a drink?
What now that they're both blind.
I'm gonna walk up and kind of like grab look at Mommy and be
like set her down on the stool and I'm going to grab this like
chair in front of Muriel and like ticket so that Mario like
Falls like into the chair and be like can you to sit down shut up
and let us Figure out how the fuck this thing works?
Yeah but good. One number three artists one
here. Be the deck.
Save for yourself, Mario with with a disadvantage, since
you're blind. If you wanted to save yourself,
No, fuck ride. A roller one, beautiful.
And then roll under the table, and stand up, and hit your head
on it under the table. Oh, I laugh.
You don't see any of it. Yeah, but I heard it.
Son of a bitch. Ariel feels her way up and oh
shit, that was before another for damage for you, they're
sorry. Are you down?
Not close. Nothing we arrested.
I'm going to feel around in the bar for a drink.
They are going to say Merrill's going to do the same thing.
You guys both feel like I'll chance cold clammy kind of pruny
and scaly and you feel toes and you just hear it.
Hey, what are you guys doing? What?
You feel toes. If you too With each other.
I will give you. I don't need my site.
But I'll take a drink. I'm just gonna leave them blind
and sit back down. How long does that last one
minute looks like. Yep, good.
What are you doing? Do I hear that?
Yeah, beside me to my left. Yeah, you could.
Oh my God, damn it feel as well. Who put them together?
Who did this? Could you get me to of mammoths?
Milk police shots. Okay, I need to long as you
touch my feet anymore any sits down to drinks, right?
In your hands. Just don't put your feet.
That my hands is one in my head. Yes, what?
In each of your hands? I'm gonna say, two years in
completely. Miss your glass.
Wait, wait, wait. Can I take one?
Was it put in each of your hands, misinterpreted the
situation? I'm going to keep feeling are
called, where's my second drink? I've already drank it.
I'm really not over the ions and say, how the hell do we get
stuck with these guys? well, you know Well, you just
say we, you spent two hours fucking a spider and you didn't
hear me complain about anything. But then though, I go ahead and
go through my own thing for once the fucking time.
And then why not big old Troublemaker guys are fucking
ridiculous and she shots the drink, got the and she like
double taps Chauvin leans over to Ines again.
She fucked a spider. No.
Oh wait, was it? Figure out how this thing works.
I know it was a while ago but yeah, I was I was looking into
some other things here because I remembered something else.
So it's real fast. DM work, your kind of Shifting
around on some of the faces in your realizing that you could
probably align them given enough time with your first
investigation though, you were able to get half of one whole
face put together? And it's right.
It's right order. It seems like But it's not fully
that one color at any one side yet.
Am I allowed to a sister, since I already watched your with
Advantage kind of blind. yes, if I were the the it's a
theoretical, question of like, if I were not blind, do I even
know that she's trying? You would have went and even
noticed her handling the cube yet or the try decagon yet.
But you do hear Griselda, did mention?
You're trying to figure something out.
So after that, drink with your Constitution that I did not see
yet. Yeah, no worries.
I will also be getting off soon. I'm not feeling great, but I
wanted to attend. So thanks for being.
I love it. The Tipsy though has gone to
buzzed. And I Stumble over, I might have
pushed Zola's on my way, like, you like feel the shoulder and
she like pushes it slightly and whoop.
Sorry. But I get there though, the
table You like do you have to kill?
Yes. Let me help you.
I don't like being this know, I suck with sitting, right?
Why do you think I should smash his head in?
Because I watched the whole process people have some brain.
I'll drop this Bell. And hand her the cube.
Okay. And I don't Josh you need it,
help me here and I my assumption is irie.
I copy what he does or did. thinking about that one myself,
so, Like tossed in the air and liked it.
Some history would be kind of The memory roll, you know?
Because basically you're trying to recreate exactly what he did.
In that case, which is trying to remember exactly what he did and
do it exactly like him. Yeah. 10:00.
One half of the face that Griselda had already solved is
almost solved is now less so solved. and you hear the goblin
who's stood up on the counter with the, which now you can see
with your sight back to he goes yeah, that's a tricky their
device you got I'd like to investigate it further.
With the bandage. I know that was a question but
I'm not sure why it was a question.
Goodbye, the statement exclamation a previous knowledge
of my history rule, I guess. I mean you could roll it but I'm
going to tell you that even with the role that you're going to
know that it what he did was more than a sleight-of-hand.
Basically. He just kind of he was very
Adept at what he was doing. Even with that history roll.
You're kind of you're realizing man.
That's a is a tricky Cube. As you may know, because he
moved his hands probably it wasn't just like one fail swoop.
It was like Okay, so I rolled an 18 for investigation is just
investigation. To like see.
Okay, I fucked that up. So I'm going to kind of like
Gracie if I could read put it back together and you did
exactly that. You got it exactly where
Griselda had in your life. But if I move this face moves
these ones, it doesn't really quite get these other ones over
to work. Why, there's so many faces on
this goddamn thing. She slams it down and then falls
asleep on the chair. With that, I have to go perfect
sad. I didn't get to see your full on
bar fight. That was waiting for other
people to chip in. They would Hazard, you guys are
a bunch of pussies. Except you.
Night Sir, thanks for joining us tonight.
Good night. Bye.
Am I still sorry? My still blind?
No, no. I do want to pick that thing
back up and see if I can. Do another like investigation on
it to see if I can get the other half of it, figured out.
Go ahead and roll any time, 17. you move a couple sides and
you're seeing that your progression is not going as far
as you'd like It's going in the opposite direction, actually.
I'm going to undo what I just did.
Okay, I'm going kind of set it down and just kind of stare and
I'm gonna kind of like sausage. It's kind of been hanging out at
like the corner of the bar. I'm going to motion for her to
come over. I'm going to ask her if she's
seen one of these before. as she yes, these are Only given the
higher ranking officials in hell.
Or trusted sorts. You have any idea how it might
work. Mmm.
Try not to do goblin voice again.
Mr. Snow. I was never given such a
privilege knowledge. Insider insights, if you will.
you haven't even heard any like, Rumors are going on about like
how they function. Oh rumors.
Yes, but most of which just mentioned its ability to
transport you from any level of Hell to another.
I'm going to kind of go ahead. I was just going to say Zola's
you find besides what's left of his head.
I want to specifically make sure look to see if he has like a key
or anything like some I don't know where he lives but you know
you do find kind of a journal on him besides the exploded head
and the remnants of what he was knitting that to the gore is all
over. Now you find a Journal in his
pocket. and, Small. Bag at his waist small little
drawstring bag with about 10 gold in it.
I guess. Go ahead.
That's I'm assuming you're kind of going all over him this point
to. And you, you do find a Kind of
what it looks like. A a small little Like doll
almost like a very, very tiny like also fit in as one of his
pockets. Nondescript, it doesn't doesn't
seem to have any particular uses at this moment.
It does. It just seems to be Literal.
Tiny little tiny doll. A couple things, I guess I'll
just take the pouch, put it in my pouch or whatever, but does
the doll look like someone? I know, It has no features.
Yes, very nondescript. I'm going to take that and if I
flip through just on first glance at the journal.
So I see anything about the cube or the try.
Decagon - you see a lot of writings and some vivid gory
details of by sections. And Vivisections of people.
Okay, are they gross? They are in gory detail.
But I don't know if you find that cursor.
Not so they show everything from as if done in a very analytical
way. I'm just going to open it up to
a glorious picture and lay it face up on the table.
I'm gonna grab the. Try decagon and stand up on the
table, and hold it up into the air and just say, 100 gold to
anybody who can help us work this thing.
First person, 100 gold. Both of the devil's turn to you
and laugh, huh. You killed him.
That's a good be frowned upon in some of the lower levels. but,
well, actually the higher levels, but no, I don't feel
like helping, you know, hundred gold I'm gonna kind of look
down. At the closest cultist and be
like a hundred gold, you know how to work this thing.
The they turn back to their table at that point after the
vote had seemed to grasp digress.
But the one that you would said closest to you, Doesn't even
turn around. Actually at the one closest to
them on her left. That turns to you and says we
are not from around here. I don't even know what the fuck
you're talking about. We just watched you murder
somebody. I don't think I really really
want you on our side. Or to be associated with you.
You're in hell and you don't want to be associated with
somebody who just murdered somebody have higher morals than
that. We believe people in hell should
be in. Hell, we're here on a conjugal
visit. Conjugal perfect.
The hell you're fucking somebody and you say you have higher.
Hi there. Here only for a short time using
even to be bound here. Are you here to see?
And this is all business. We're not real.
It really interested in yours. I don't see why you're
interested. Nas. well, what if we're looking
to see the same person, well, maybe if you tell us who you're
looking for, we asked first. and then the the one that does have
their Hood down turns around and says, Look.
Y'all being calls in a rockets in here and we really about
that. So if you're one in any
information from us, you're going to have to give a little,
give a lot to get a little I know what you're looking to get,
but we're trying to get to the 13th stage.
Oh, that's a hottie. Ask them is we have not been
down that far? We only visit some of the higher
uppermost regions of Hell itself.
Why are you scared? Well, that's where the conjugal
visits are. Hmm.
Prostitutes. It's a pretty look on her face
and says that is a derogatory turn.
We are escorts. They're fucking hell
prostitutes. Oh, I'm trying to be a hell
prostitute on the 13th stage of Health.
Hell yes. Okay, so I don't know your name
but my name is dead. Mariel.
How did you come to join your profession?
Oh, we work for the Neophytes above, in the upper regions,
Towers on the actual mortal plane.
But to answer your to answer your last question, but as to
your name of Maddie and mine is Fred.
Do I know anything about the neophytes other than Zoe's, I
don't think 0 about the neophytes because Zola's refused
to drink the reality. Yeah, Chauvin steps forward and
said you can leave hell. Asks, I should say.
By this we may add to will leave hell, don't believe you're of
the same ilk low. and how do you leave hell then that is for us
to know and you to find out I guess.
I'd like to find out. Well, it appears you all have
been branded for hell. I'm not quite sure how you might
be able to leave, but as we are not branded for hell, we do not
require any extra means other than walking out the same door.
You came in. I saw him walk away.
What door did you guys come in? And Friday, I just turns and
points to the exact door that you guys walked in.
That's how you got into hell. I you just walked in and
appeared in this bar. Am I speaking another language
to you? I'm doing Insight.
Check on this bitch. I'll wait for this Insight.
Check. The 16.
You're pretty sure she's telling the truth, except for when she
had turned around to point at the door.
What George did you really come into?
She just rolls her eyes and goes back to her meal with her
compatriots. I'm going to turn back to this
ice devil at the bar like, 150, gold. that's not enough even
Tequila to get me drunk. Bumbaclot, how much would it
take to get you to help us? Turns back interested.
Whoa. Hmm.
Perhaps not perhaps, not how much but what could you do for
me? What do you want done for you?
Hmm. Well, you see.
I believe I've been informed of your entrance into this level.
And I think you all are the shadow.
Seekers. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I
famous thing. That you'd be able to.
Kill that gentleman over there in points to the ice devil that
had stopped paying attention to the conversation.
Because I want the table. Yeah, on the other side of the
room. Because he's been sleeping with
my wife and he at that he just turns around and slams kick
basically Stomps on the floor and says possible.
I have not been sleeping with your wife except for on weekends
that dirty slut. Before we do anything, I feel
like we should get this guy to prove that he can do what he's
saying. He can do, everyone else says
this cube is like sorry Tribeca Han is Just impossible.
I don't know if I'm sure this guy knows what he's doing.
I agree. How do we know you know how to
solve this? It's open.
You didn't ask that question. Just figured you didn't kill
Percival. I guess I would have to go talk
to Tanaka. He's the only one on this level
that else had access to such a thing.
No dice. We can we can just go straight.
I'm just gonna hop down off the table and look at it and be
like, sorry, but you're going to have to deal with your own
marital disputes and just start walking out.
And I'm gonna like say over the torque that I'm going to go find
Tanaka and see if he can help us with this.
It's the first time to everybody.
Did it, kill someone. And in the meantime, I'm just
gonna walk over here and lean. in on the bar, you know, prop
prop, their head, you know, put their elbow on the bar, pop
their head up with their fists and look at cockatrice and be
like, What brings you to these parts?
Says a heavily beaked individual that's leaning over a mug.
That is a chicken standing on the bar with their face in the
mug. That's all they say, is Seems
like they're trying to play this game.
Yeah. Anybody that can talk to animals
want to come over and translate? Yeah I can do that.
I go over and try and figure out what the cockatrice to say.
You catch the tail ends of Ven. I fucked a good, he just said,
fuck her. Good is what I caught.
Sounds like she had a good time. Wait, what did you fuck good?
The Devil by stubbles wife. Seems to perk up at your
macaques and goes. You can understand me.
Yeah, yeah, kid. Oh shit I was actually that was
so shocking about the past and how it appears chicken What
about your past to be ended up as a chicken happened in your
past, you ended up as a chicken. Well, there was this lady and
she was looking mighty fine, an offer to buy a drink she
refused. But I wouldn't take no for an
answer ended up in hell as a chicken.
That's doppelganger chicken here was not a chicken in as fast.
He Got a little too horny and wouldn't take no for an answer
and ended up in. Hell is a chicken You want to
ask him, how long, he's been here, mr.
Chicken, how long have you been here?
Our crack? God damn it.
My apologies. What?
Uh, What, uh, how long have you been down here?
Oh, it's hard to say after all of this tequila, it's pretty
strong. It's been a coon's age.
You know, anything about tried ductal Deca Homes at Rod.
Decker? Fucker Walker?
Did she say the fancy 13 sided Cube over there?
He doesn't, he doesn't know. He just said, try Deco.
He's a chicken. You might not know what the name
of it is. It doesn't mean he doesn't know
how to use it if he's been here for a hot second.
I'm sure he's seen people, use it during your discussions with
the chicken Griselda. You've made it down to the
Tanaka. Yeah, I'm just going to look in
and be like, hey, we did you a favor and I'll can you do us a
favor. Oh, what would that be?
How do I use? if, if we were to have procured
a Try decagon. How might we go about using?
It is eyes. enlarge twice their size and he says, if one might
divert acquired such a things they would need to know of the
learnings and of the infield word that I forget the what's
that called when you when you're solving a Rubik's Cube there,
there are these It's a term used in computer language to but it
you algorithm algorithm. Thank you.
Damn it. Oh, it's so cool.
We're yeah, you got it. Yeah.
Okay. So it would be that of the
algorithms Right. So what's the algorithm
hypothetically? Hypothetically I might be in
possession of one of those and it might take a day to learn Oh,
an evening at most? Can you show me?
You may have been able to do something for me, but this is a
particular value. He cracks his knuckles and he
looks at you after petting a sleeping and now sleeping. 30
mr. Tibbles yeah, gets me and he's
goes. I'd be willing, though, to part
for it for us. Let's simple thing.
Which would be what a back door into Hooch and Pooch.
Because that God damn titty, milk ain't doing it for me. and
we used to have one at the back of Abba, which aptly named is a
sphincter? They backdoor should be yes in
the storage rooms of the bar Bill.
I'm just going to keep referring to that because finked is just
anyhow, there seems to have been an infestation around the
entrance into the who the old the old ways into huijin pooch.
and if you can clear that and I'll for our direct passage, we
could We could part with it with these instructions.
You want us to go to the back of the sphincter and clear out the
infestation. Yes.
That would be a condition of what I'm at you're not there.
I know that I can't say. No, that would have been my next
line, of course. What is infecting the sphincter?
Well, it seems to have been a small horde of scorpion.
Let me get this straight. You have devils.
And mr. Tibbles here.
And you need us to clear out a small horde of scorpions.
They are known as the devil's crabs.
Inside. Check this guy cuz I feel like
there's more to this than just a small horde of scorpions.
But I don't know because it's a natural fucking one.
We're going to find out soon enough kind of shrugs and goes.
Well, he doesn't show anything so because you're looking at
what he said so far. And at the words of devil
scorpion, you're getting a picture or a doubles Krabs,
you're getting a picture of literal crabs with, like horns
on their heads, while he's talking, In your head.
How many scorpions are we talking An Inconvenient amount
for any one individual but should be easy enough.
If you have your friends along, I'll park number.
Yeah, shoot well. Last, I'd heard from.
Pork, the resident Goblin. He'd said something like two to
three adult scorpions. Which would Slaughter him in any
case. Koreans.
Probably about as big as a goblin.
I'm just gonna kind of like, Get over the torque and be like,
hey, you guys want to kill 223? Maybe more Goblin size,
scorpions in the back of that bar.
I'm already halfway there. Welcome be like so we have your
word that if we do this you'll show us how to use one of those
things hi-yah. Yes I'll be back.
I'm just gonna walk back to the bar.
Wait till this where are you? Oh, you just move to the other
side of the table I was like yeah I was like what halfway
there anyways. Are we going to get to see
what's on the other side of the other wall?
Because that's what I really want to see.
I'm just gonna, like, walk up to the goblin be like, hey, Tanaka
told us to Hope you with your scorpion problem.
Crabs vent would be wonderful, those deviled crabs.
If you just go straight through here and he points.
To this door and it runs off down.
It after jumping off the bar, and he's standing here.
Just inside the door. I'm gonna, I'm gonna look at
this ice devil and just see. See if I can do this.
I'm going to look at ice. That would be like, hey, if you
and your friend come and help us maybe, There might be and I'm
just going to kind of like look over at this other ice devil
behind me and then lean into this one in front of me.
Be like maybe there might be a casualty in the battle.
It's the if he's going for it, I didn't I didn't catch the very
last part of what you said. I'm sorry.
I'm gonna like lean into this ice devil.
Like in front of me, be like, hey, if you and you can convince
your friend to come along with us.
If you to help us maybe there might be an unfortunate casualty
in that battle and then your marriage problems maybe would be
solved. I hear a lot of maybes wank,
wank. I mean if we're we're fighting
scorpions and you guys have scorpion-like tails.
If he happens to get stabbed by a scorpion.
Oh, you're fighting the scorpions in the back.
Yeah. Oh yeah, he won't die from that.
I'm trying to give you, I'm trying to give you a Excuse to
get him into the back and kill him.
I don't want to kill him. I want somebody else to kill
him, Jesus. Okay.
You can take that symbol off to Zola's.
Muriel's, olitz. Yeah.
Oh, that changed that. That changed it up there.
Did you change that? No, I didn't.
I didn't press it. I don't think I changed it.
Maybe I changed it in the wrong place.
I tried to change it in. Your nickname is where I tried
to change it. But I must have changed
elsewhere. And if I click on it, just sends
it to know how to change it. If you right click on it and
then edit, okay, there's a literal fucking mammoth back
here. Frozen drink, large Frozen
gutters. It's a door.
I love It just want to hang out back here.
What's on the table? What is this?
And he's just cups where over there.
Are you like going up to it? Yeah, I want to know what's and
there's like a barrel. What is what is this washing
station? Everyone roll initiative.
Oh, Maybe that's the point, maybe they see you before you
see them. Wait, five.
Why did it show five? I didn't roll a five or rolled
an 18. Whatever.
How about know? There's there's 12 Nine of them,
I wrote an 18. Fuck that.
Whatever this is nothing like going first but whatever.
Thanksgivings gonna 22. Yeah I rolled 22.
So. I still got a long list of,
right. Oh Jesus, there's a lot more
than two or three. Yeah there is Why am I not
surprised? It is handled again.
Is hell. Is this where they just sent two
or three large squirt like adult scorpions?
I didn't ask how many small scorpions there were juveniles.
Okay, so you got to Chauvin at 22.
Mame 18. Zola's need to make sure I go
back through this. I got a nine.
So well. Ines a 6-pound.
There's a giant scorpion behind us.
Don't forget that guy and Griselda.
Zelda, what was that? All those the Insight before?
Okay, I think I got everyone. That's here.
Now, Sasha is a five. Yeah, yep.
Okay, so that did work. Alright Chauvin, you're up to
bat first but I don't know if we want to figure out if you think
you're going to be able to. Yeah, I'm going to turn on the
health bars but you're up first. Okey-dokey.
I'm going to use my bonus action to turn into my peppers, and my
health is Health. 45 should have roll, what a show of as hell
points. Click here to roll, lame 5100
you get to roll for it each time.
It died. Just I assume I roll them up
that I changed into. It's normally let me see here.
Kind of if you've noticed the they do come with like their
standard ones at least. Yeah I see the fixed Health the
Molly average Health 37 yeah that's their average but I know
you were rolling in your campaign was cool.
I mean, I rolled from some of the men, I like fuck that.
But since it was just one unlike I mean, I figure I won't, but
I'll go 37 if you want. Either way, you can go 51 for
now and then 37, I just get a lot bigger.
No I dragged and dropped. Okay, just to see the creature
off to the side that. Yeah, well I want to come down
here since I have friends near me.
I get pack advantage. And then I'm going to roll to
attack. Hopefully, all that makes it
over. Oh, shit out.
No I didn't quit, that's a lie. It is that it's a dirty 20.
I do see a 15 whenever I have a rubber it.
Yeah. So I assume Only Hits.
Yep. All right.
And I hit six and I mean I guess I can knock it on its back so
you pull its back leg out and then it falls flat to the
ground. That works is that where there's
a 13 safe and yeah, I'm gonna go for slate.
Thirteen d.c. Dive.
Okay. It is it falls straight down it?
Helped by fallen and I can't get up.
Oh, And all you melee, people get Advantage, hitting it now.
Oh yeah. Needs to be better symbols for
these sorts of things. But 6.
It just a measly six. And that ends my turn.
Okay. Then Mommy.
But do you grab it by the back of the leg?
So if you wanted to describe beyond that you could, but I was
basically assuming to from that you can see from the top of the
health bar, how much damage you did total.
So that kind of gives you an idea of how much physical damage
you would have done. If you want to describe it.
Beyond. Actually just knocking it down
but I grab its leg get and I've jerked back like a dog.
Doesn't are our and it's stumbles back and falls off its
feet and onto Billy. And the cups under it, kind of
scatter onto the floor. There are plates and cups under
it as where it happened, when you went to go reach for it at.
Jumped. On top of it, Mommy.
So it is your turn though after you've, right and your companion
shift into a dog and bite its leg, huh?
okay, so I'm going to go after I'm gonna go after this big boy
back here. I'm gonna walk over to him, I
can move 40 and I'm going to attack him with my grade EX
Fuck, yeah. 23 to hit do that hits.
I don't know why none of this is coming through.
And the damage is One D, 12 plus 4 and I'm 7 plus 11.
It damaged Are you swimming with the regular grid X or the stone
one? The regular grid X.
Okay. I know you had a bunch of better
axes to. I just didn't remember all the
ones that you'd gotten, which I know we talked about updating
them, that's why I'm just checking.
Yeah, just the regular great acts.
I'm also going to as a bonus go into a frenzy, I won't let me
send it to the chat, doesn't matter because the chat support,
but it says well in a frenzy, you can make a single melee
weapon attack as a bonus action on each of your turns.
After this one, So next time I'll be able to do another melee
attack. Okay.
And I think that's all I got. What was the result of that date
of that damage roll. 11. Thank you so 23 to hit 11
damage. Oops.
So you slyke into its claw with that, exposing the, some juicy
flesh underneath of the giant claw, that was just behind the
chest. You'd only noticed it just
because it was poking over to come towards you guys.
And I'm guessing you would have ran in between the chest to come
back and /. It Hurriedly.
Oops, and then then it's that one's turned.
It looks like so it steps over the chest a little bit and
Tries to glad to pinch you with its two, large closets coming
over the top. With a 21 and a 14.
Who is you? Mommy it's the same one
attacking. Oh, cuz the one that's
highlighted is down here. Isn't it is?
I was on top of this one. That's why it looked like it was
highlighted to me. Sorry.
So that's cool. No it's it's good.
So was it one of the top or the one down here?
It is. The one that's on the bottom
down here, and it's going towards That the donkey that?
Wait. No.
It can't move it. In this one's case.
Never mind. It's standing.
Well, it can stand up but then it's attacking.
That's what we discovered, that's right.
Yeah, it can stand up because that it's Batman and then take a
thick. Yep.
So it's standing up and turning around to will fuck.
Sorry. re try and pinch and Pinch you for 21 and a 14-0
should I think. What's my D Stacy.
Yay, 14. Only one of this.
Both of them. Remember we established as well
as 14 would hit a 14-0? Yep.
So what's the damage of that? You also have to roll a DC for
me, 12 with a I guess it gets, it doesn't say it says, but it
would be a dexterity saving throw.
Basically, it won't be Athletics.
Go against it. It would be strength to
overthrow it in my high. My higher stat, sorry.
No, Yeah, fuck the one claw. Your grapple by one claw and
Take. 17:08 oh, that's big 17 in total.
Okay. I was negating the sting.
In this particular instance, what kind of damage are these
scorpions giving it is bludgeoning for the clause.
Wow, that is better to get bit. Tiny one, wanders, up to you
Zola's. Your feet.
Tries to sting at your boots for 17.
Yeah. One piercing damage.
Target must make a DC Constitution.
Saving throw not your foots. So, one damage and DC cons to a
change. 21, you feel a sting on your
toe, your big toe, but it's like, is if you would stepped on
a splinter, Ow. Wait.
Wait, wait. I took damage, right?
Yeah, one damage. From that from that that was it.
The Constitution was to see you feel a Warmness around the, the
pain. But Okay, I'm Gonna Catch.
Hell was rebuked on it. Is that damage?
I have to find that many dice to d-10.
Or just rule one d-10 and then one Dita. 13.
It just in the flame. It died, nice and roasted.
Just curls up. and, To a nice Bruce.
I point my finger at it and when it roasts up afterwards, I blow
it out like like it's the gun, you know, like cool.
What do you say you for your hellish rebuke again?
I forget, I know you point your finger at it like you said, but
I have been just making all of my spells just infernal
incantation because I feel like that would be creepy and cool.
Okay, so like in the actual infernal language, okay?
Now you need to learn infernal like in real life.
But I would probably enjoy that. It's all this time.
They need to add it to do lingle.
Lingual link. Oh my God.
Also the list, you're on Deck. No, I am going to walk.
You know, walk around to here. and, I'm going to touch the end
of my like the stone, at the end of my Staff and I'm going to
whisper into it and infernal and it's gonna kind of start glowing
like sickly green, and like green energy is going to pull
this off of it. And I'm just going to Touch it
too. the Stinger, like the hooked part of the Stinger of
the Scorpion and cast inflicted wounds, 17 to hit that hits.
And it takes. 32, necrotic damage.
Hello, welcome back, Jesus. You said 32 damage.
Yep. So the top, you know what?
In this case just particularly because I like the sound of this
in my brain thought of it but it was cool.
So you aim for that spot you're talking about just before the
tip of the tail it the necrotic damage as you're striking it
with your staff. Just Eats through the last
little vestiges of tendons that are holding it together there
and it falls and Strikes. It on the top of its own head
and it falls dead apparently killing itself with the with its
stinger that you melt it all and then As my bonus action.
I'm going to help it. Stop.
Sorry. I'm going to 5 and 15.
Yeah, I'm going to like look across the room at like,
Chauvin. That is like, grappled in this
scorpion claw. and I'm just going to shout and be like,
Well, you're a dog. So I don't know if you
understand me, but I'm just gonna shout and be like You'll
be fine and cast healing word. As a bonus action so you can
five Health back. What's that distance?
60 feet. Oh nice.
Yeah. Yay.
Thank you. And I can still understand you.
I can't speak to you understand, you okay, not on my turn and
then So listen, as your turn with a bunch of tiny little
scorpions that seem to be skittering towards you.
I turn a little bit Ein zero on Deck.
And I spread out my hands with my thumbs touching.
I start monitoring and infernal and I cast burning hands, and
try and hit as many scorpions as I can.
In a 15-foot cone in front of me, so, like I'm in the perfect
position where I won't hit any of my friends, but hopefully I
can hit as many of these scorpions as possible.
Sweet. And they have to make dexterity
saving throws. You guys here.
Well, as having very intense, hell yes.
Is she running? No just barking running.
May come next. Anyway.
Being sick sucks. Sick.
I'm rolling all the dexterity saving throws.
So that was letting you guys. Okay.
So they have to make a 15:15 and you say if they teach Veil yeah
15. If they fail, they take 20 and
if they say they take 10, Oh, I wish I had to read that part
first. Other than this one to your to
your right? That's on top of the barrels
there. They all are hit by it.
It looks like from my vantage, I was going, I was going to debate
whether or not the one here just to your left would make it but I
would assume that at least sort of hits it.
But the one to your right is far enough off to that exact like
right angle that it wouldn't in my opinion.
That giant one. Well the definitely the giant
one that's to your left but the one to your right?
Just beside Ines on top of the banner quarter.
Yeah okay being for is what I was thinking as well that it
wouldn't really reach because it's in a cone and Cones are
always hotly debated but I'm thinking of it as like it's
coming from. So I don't know how you're
casting it but I was imagining for some reason that you're like
I know, what do you say burning hand?
But for some reason, my imagination runs wild and you
brought your own burning hand up to your up to your mouth and
kind of blue on it. And it just went and in that
cone. It's your call when it hits but
it also catches flammable things on fire which I didn't really
think about. Cuz I'm sure there's a lot in
this room. Durante Barrel toll of alcohol.
Whether or not? It's flammable, a koala is
another discussion. Who is but basically, from the
cone, you see, you see your objective just similar to the
first scorpion. Just they're all perfectly
cooked perfectly in that meet them.
Cone in front of you. And the barrels are all will sin
used on the outside currently, but otherwise nothing seems to
have a lit from that quick. As it wasn't.
You're guessing prolonged enough to catch the wood on fire.
Oops. And then The one that you did
Miss does get her up or down the barrels and tries to strike a
guess Ines before his turn. Gotcha. 19 to hit 19 does hit.
That's 11 damage and roll a D6 Constitution, saving throw for
me. Constitution. 18 and you feel
warmth spread from that but nothing else.
So you just take that one damage and it is your top.
Okay, well as before I take my turn, I want to use my
opportunity of attack because he moved within my Striking
Distance. Would it be wouldn't?
Oh, it's that one special that are you were talking about the
pole arm or Master? Yeah, poor Master opportunity to
attacks 22 to hit. Oh yeah.
Cool. 22 damage or no, that's another hit.
I do that. No T20.
Plus it note. That was another hit.
Ignore that one. 14 damage. So the polearm master remind me
is that the one where your, but using the butt of the pull are
more, is that using the know that the butt of it is my bonus
action. Okay.
So you just, you feel it kind of poke your foot basically and
just immediately swing down and, and it's into in the ground and
two halves with its greenish. Shhhh.
I Corps going down into the stones of the floor, but it's,
it's definitely dead. I just sent the opportunity of
Attack One. All right, to that it's called
officially my turn. Oh yeah cool.
I'm going to move over to the giant scorpion.
And then we're going to hit him with a surprise attack once per
combat, if you surprised a creature and hit it with your
attack, on your first turn, in your combat, the attack deals
and extra D6. So I'm going to hit him with my
hella bread. 11 to hit that does not hit.
I'm going to use my second attack. 15 to hit.
That hits cool. That's a 14.
And then, I mean, use my bonus action.
To hit him with the butt of it. 210.
The headset so I could hit them new, it does not.
All right, so he takes 14 image all day.
And that's will end my turn. Okay, so with the claw that it
just missed Chauvin and that he's not holding onto him with
you, chop that one off and it falls to the ground. but when
you go up to strike for it, just kind of skitters a little bit
back, still holding onto shoven grappled Then it would be
Sakura's turn. Okay, she's gonna fly up in
between Zola's and I'm and I am. I used her tail.
Only one hit. Yep. let's 6 damage and then, I
don't know if they're immune to poison or not, but if not, they
need to make a constitution saving throw.
So it's not oh taking poison damage on a failed saver half as
much on the successful one so it takes for poison damage on top
of a 6 piercing. And then she's going to kind of
fly by feedback that one per turn.
It's just strikes, the top of it and flies back out.
And you Sasha knows that I pierced the high or the carapace
knowing that I did it done what it's supposed to be and then
it's children's turn again. But then five feet of Iams like
it to attack an advantage. Was it was an advantage.
It still hits, right? But I could credit.
That's true. That is true.
It is not crit. I'll take the first damage
though because it showed and I hit it 45 and I want grappled
even though it has a chance of Naga prone, that's up to you.
Because I can't really charge or jerk.
I'm can't move. Trying to go back to yours and
how that prone works. But I'm, I know, I'd kind of
described it. I like to chat.
Well, the Burbage of the problem.
Yeah, exactly. Man.
Combat is a lot as chat, heavy. All right.
I'd say probably not, I can't knock it.
For instance, I'm held, I can't Jerk it around and knock it
down. I was thinking that you wouldn't
be able to jerk it around necessarily, but you'd be able
to still knock it prone with your own mass is what I was kind
of figuring to so like it's holding on to you.
And if you're able to flail around enough to knock it off
balance, basically. Works for me.
It just gets back up. Anyways, because this turns next
know, I think, I think the other way to protect first needs to
make Strength. I do some yeah.
Yeah, he's fine. Yep.
I see it now. And you done five.
I'm going to do that 2317. Okay.
Are you aiming for anything? Well it's claw.
That's why I kind of at the club told me all the cloud that's
holding you. Okay.
So you were able to grab like on to it as well while it's holding
you and you're trying to flail flail around and you get a
decent chunk of meat in your mouth, as well as the the claw
carapace that's holding you, but it doesn't seem to release you
quite yet. It is also mommy's turn.
It is also 10:17. It is and there is only the one
mostly dead scorpion that you can see.
I'll give me with meanness hugging you with meekness
correct. I mean, wolf walk over.
And I'm going to attack it. With the great Axe.
I'm not gonna be 14 to hit that does not hit well, that sucks.
But I do get another melee attack because your frenzy I'm
in a frenzy I'm Gonna Roll again.
I'm not is a 17 to hit and that hits and that is if you stay
super, so cool. That's a 12 damage.
What are you doing? Do it?
That's a death Guild. I am, I am sticking my axe.
I'm going to raise it above my head, and I'm going to bring it
down as hard as I can, and just try to, like, slice it in half
and you succeed in such burying your X in the top of the chest
that the cups were in plates, were on that are all scattered
across the floor. Now, and just with the of the,
Inner green ichor just oozing out of it.
The carapace. So there was no more combat.
All right, it let go me another up against her for saving me.
I definitely give lots of head paths and behind the ear
scratches nice. I'm a happy boy.
Yep. So killed all the small
infestation. Got drunk a little bit.
Off of a mammoth teat. Oh, thank the mammoth
okey-dokey. Oh good shit.
So I figure out how to work this.
Cube always go somewhere more, interesting, next time. not that
the bar is not interesting, but fan of the bar, I'm glad I think
Bart's good time. I'm very tired.
I'm gonna go to bed. It's lovely good.
Session night. Good night light, I appreciate
the 13 sided object good. Yeah, yeah.
Alright, until next week indeed, good night.
Are we just long resting in the back of this bar?
I don't know about that. I figured it was just a press
pause while you guys were Kind of like shaking yourselves off
after yeah, quickly stomping on all of these scorpions.
Venice. Yeah.
Woohoo, I should be sober. Yeah, the healing word doesn't
help if you receive any type of healing.
Wait, what's that? You're reading the drunkenness.
Oh yeah, we're under hangovers. Optional talked about healing,
any type of healing decrease your number of failures by one.
I assume that means more for the next day for The Hangover
portion. So like it wouldn't it's not
yeah healing healing doesn't, I wouldn't imagine.
Anyway, it wouldn't work on. On poisoning.
Which is basically what alcohol is?
Be like trying to heal a necrotic wound of sorts.
Whoa. That's why says my bad hey no
worries. If you receive any type of
healing decrease your number of failures by one.
Oh yeah. Yeah.
That moves from blackout and they move.
Okay. See ya this is this is all just
like a. That's now that's a that's legit
than because I was I was using this as a reference basically
because I hadn't come up with anything of my own but that's so
you could potentially do it, but I wasn't using normal healing It
only because it's specifies in that healing for your health. as
opposed to, like, For poison or something like that.
It's all good. Here's your people are stronger
than me that hangover Roll to be fine.
Alright peeps, I'm a hop off here.
You guys have a good one. Yeah.
Me too. You too good night night.
State your hand from The Mean, Kitty.
A grand and wonderful. Thank you for those who took the
time and made it here to the end of the episode where I know
sometimes we are long-winded and others.
We are just dead silent. Don't know what to tell you is
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