Yeah, we can put that in there too.
Yeah. I messed up the last attempt at
the intro. Hi, I'm Courtney.
Welcome to Something Positive for Positive People, the podcast
where I speak with individuals living with or who have
experiences with STD's about their personal experience.
Today I am here with Teresa, who is, did you say, 61?
I am. 60. One, you are 61 years old fine
wine girl, fine wine. So you have HSV type one and
type 2 and you were diagnosed at age 52.
You are a Caucasian female who lives in Charlotte, Salisbury.
Oh, so close. Salisbury.
That's North Carolina, right? Right.
OK, got it. What am I missing?
Caucasian 61. What is your career field?
I'm a. Registered nurse now.
Retired. Oh, you're retired nurse?
I thought retirement age was 65 to let you off early.
I gotta go. On disability.
Oh, I'm sorry, it's OK. Is it, is it kind of like a
vacation for you or do you miss work?
I. I it's like working with.
No coffee breaks? Yikes.
Wait, now you're working Still I.
I have 4 generations living in my.
House. Oh, OK.
And that's what parents, children, grandchildren.
Yep. Oldest to say one and the
youngest is five. Oh man, you got the whole
spectrum there. So you got like like smoothies
and and and fruit snacks involves at.
All. That's awesome.
So you're staying active, safe to assume?
All right, now we talked about earlier, we talked a lot and I'm
very, very thankful that you were able to hop on here and
just get to recording because I would like to carry the momentum
from that conversation into this podcast episode.
So first, let's start with your own personal story about how you
were diagnosed, when you were diagnosed, and just everything
that was going on around that time.
OK, my ex and I were not having a great marriage and I found out
on my 52nd birthday as a matter of fact, that he had been
cheating on me. He left his e-mail open to an
alternate lifestyle website and it said safe sex and he said
sometimes and my eyes shot through the top of my head and
Long story short I decided to kick him out.
But unfortunately by that point he had given me herpes.
I had all the blood tests done and they said, Yep, you're
negative for everything but herpes.
And of course, then I decided I was gonna fall apart briefly.
Geez, now I'm 52 and I'm single. Who's gonna want me now?
Mm Hmm. And I envisioned many years
alone, and I said, you know, let's see what we can do.
So I immediately jumped on my laptop and googled herpes dating
sites. Don't ask me why I grab dating
instead of supporting. Well, and the thing about that
though is a lot of people who are diagnosed with something
immediately go to who's going to want me or because that that's
mostly what's impacted. What's mostly impacted when you
contract an STD is sex. I mean, I mean, you can have sex
with yourself, but it's not near as fun as with other people.
So at that point is who's going to want to have sex with me?
And if no one's going to want to have sex with me, I'm going to
be alone because obviously that's all the opposite sex or
whatever interests you have is going to want from you.
Now, we skipped a few details about what was going on in terms
of your divorce and kicking your husband out.
Do you want to touch on that or should we leave that alone?
OK, no. This is called the download.
OK, I'm bringing the download to the upfront.
Oh. There is.
My ex-husband was unhappy, but I had no idea how unhappy or why.
And it turned out that when he left his website, the
alternative lifestyle website open, he also left his e-mail
open. And I got quite an education.
And basically there's a whole organization of married men who
live a homosexual lifestyle. And they don't, they go home to
their wives and their kids, and then they do whatever on Yeah.
And they go into, you know, different towns.
And he was only working part time.
And I said, why don't you get another job?
Well, I found out why he was busy playing in his free time
while I was working full time. Yeah, so that was that was a
deal breaker for me. As it probably would be for most
people and. I waited three months and I
finally kicked him out. But yeah, I had to.
It was really hard because I had been faithful all the all 32
years we've been together. You two were together for 32
years with WE. Were married 25 and together 32
years. Wow, OK.
And I had to have a whole lifestyle change.
I mean, everything I saw in my future went out the window.
And I was pretty. I was pretty devastated because
I don't even think about getting tested right away.
I was so shocked that I was cheated on.
And then friends of mine said, wait a minute, he's been having
sex, not with you. And without necessarily safe,
safe sex, girl, you need to get tested.
And immediately I went and I said run everything, don't leave
anything out. And that's the thing people
don't realize too. When you go to your doctor and
you say I want an SI want to be checked for STD's, unless you
specify a herpes panel. They do syphilis, they do
gonorrhea, they do chlamydia, they do, they don't, they do
HIV. They don't do herpes unless you
specifically say I want you to also test me for herpes, right?
It's an expensive test and not every, but that's where a lot of
people think, oh, I'm clean. I don't have anything because
they erroneously think because they weren't tested for herpes,
which they didn't know that they're, you know, they've got
nothing. In the meantime, herpes rolls on
and on. And so it's it's something that
needs to be known. When you go for a test, ask
specifically for it. Yeah.
Now as a registered nurse or I'm sorry, retired registered nurse,
you've you, you have a little bit of insight there.
So we've, I'm finding in my experience and talking to so
many different people that it's a little bit challenging to get
the test done that you want. There are cases where the doctor
says come back when you have an outbreak.
There are instances where it said they say something along
the lines of, well, the test won't be accurate unless you are
having an outbreak. If you experience any symptoms,
come back to us. There's all kinds of things
across the entire spectrum of excuses.
So why exactly is it challenging for some people to get tested
unless they're just bullshitting me?
And here I am, like now, in front of a medical professional
asking this question. Well, if they're going to do a
swab and test that way, then it's very hard to test if you
don't have something open to actually get cells from.
But I didn't have anything going on, and my doctor just did a
part of blood work, and that's how I found out I never got
swapped for anything. So there's no reason.
Oh, well, you haven't had an outbreak or you haven't done
this. Just give them an arm and they
can take a tourniquet and get the blood, do the test, and
you're on your way. Yeah.
So it it doesn't matter. You know, that's a cop out.
I think sometimes too, you know. Oh, we're not gonna do it.
No, no, no, no. Yeah.
This is where people really have to be their own advocate.
They have to be assertive. And education is not a bad
thing. This is what you know, look and
see what can be done. Look what kind of tests are
done, herpes support sites, CDC, you've got Central disease
center, you've got local health department.
If you have questions, call these resources because these
are the ones who can tell you what you need to find out and
where to go for health questions.
If you're, if you're really devastated by it, call your
local health department. Mm hmm, to get mental mental
health department to get some, maybe some support on the phone.
Got it. No.
One's never feel alone because of this.
Yeah. And that's, that's a tough thing
to say to someone who is in that state of loneliness and sadness
and anger, frustration, confusion, all of the negative
emotions that come with a diagnosis.
So knowing that those resources are available and out there for
people, I think is tremendously helpful.
Just just it, it just takes the courage and effort to be able to
just reach out to any of those. So I've noticed that there are
people who live in denial about it or who would just prefer to,
you know, be ignorant to it and be like, oh, no, I, I can't have
that. That can't be what it is.
It's just an ingrown hair or who have, you know, some sort of an
outbreak or have come into contact with it and just chosen
not to be tested. And you know what, I understand
it. It's scary, you know, and you
don't want to have to adjust to the lifestyle changes that come
with that diagnosis, but just just know that the resources are
out there. So back to you, Teresa.
So you kick your then husband out.
You go get tested. You find out that you have did
you find out you had HSV one and two with this one test?
OK, so now when you confronted. Him and I still kept the copy of
the blood test from all those years ago.
When you confronted your husband, how did he take it?
Shocked I when I was busy telling him, when I was busy
handing him the separation agreement to sign and tell him
he had to leave. I said, oh by the way, you gave
me herpes, go get yourself tested.
And he and he looked at me like his mouth hung open and his he
was just in total shock. And that wasn't something he
could have faked. I knew that was a genuine, he
had no concept that that, you know, had happened.
But I never, but I never got an apology.
As a matter of fact, what he said to me was you got what you
deserved. Oh shit, yeah, that's
unexpected. But I mean, if you, if you got
it from him, like who really deserved it, you know, like
you're, you're cheating, you know?
Yeah, it was my, it was everything was always my fault
so but. Good Ridge is.
It made it easier to get over, even though it was hard to get
over losing my partner for so many years because I didn't have
the parts he wanted. So it wasn't a competition.
So that itself made it easier. I mean, you could go get him I
guess at the store. That was the same thing.
He was looking for. Oh man, So I he ends up leaving
and do you think that him being the way that he was towards you,
that that's what made it easy for you to just kind of move on
right it? Wasn't easy.
I went from 2, you know, been married for 25 years, having
two, I had two children that were 18 and 20 and and 20.
And it was hard because what I had envisioned was a future.
You know, when you're in your 50s especially, you start
looking ahead to those senior years.
Right and. They were stretched out ahead of
me and I had no body. And if I followed along with the
general thinking about herpes, I wasn't gonna get anybody either.
Mm hmm. And being an older woman, the
chances of getting someone are a little lessened.
You know, you, they don't want to come with baggage or anything
else. Well, you've got some baggage.
If you've got herpes, it's a little bit more you've got to
bring to the table. Yeah, 'cause you're past a point
where it's like, oh, you have kids.
Like someone in my well, I don't want to say my age, but like
early 20s, if you have kids, that's kind of a that's baggage
when you're in your upper 40s, fifties and all your kids are
out of the house. I mean, that's irrelevant.
But would you excuse me? Would you say that the reason
your marriage ended was for because of the herpes or because
of the cheating? Like let's say you hadn't gotten
herpes from now, so it was a cheat.
'Cause I had already decided to kick him out before I found out.
Oh. I only.
Found out about two weeks after I told him.
After I found out I I went for testing 2 weeks later OK but
then I kept it quiet for three months before I actually
confronted him and said I'm done.
Yeah, So wait, you were already on the verge of being about to
kick him out? Like what?
What was that? Oh, we were.
Just we just had a miserable marriage.
And now? I know why he was so unhappy
and, and I, he was always critical and I could never do
anything right. He was a narcissistic, you know,
verbally abusive, not physically abusive.
Yeah. And you, you know it probably if
if I had continued down the road, I probably would have come
to some point where said, you know what I'm through.
But this was a catalyst. It was like, OK, deal breaker.
I did not sign up for that. You've got to.
Go Are you happier now? I am deliriously.
Happy. It is funny how, and I, I say
this with people I speak with about herpes who have gone
through and made it to the other side, just about how much
happier they are now. Like at that point in time,
herpes was the worst possible thing that could have happened
to you. But would you say now that you
know, well, I know that you said this because we talked about it.
You said that herpes was literally the best thing that
ever happened to you. So can you talk to us about
that? Like why is herpes the best
thing that ever happened to you? Well.
As soon as I found out that I was, I was diagnosed with it,
and that was November 2008. I immediately started looking
for things, you know, what do I deal with?
And dating was the first thing. And I came upon this site and it
said, oh, OK. And it was support.
And they had, you know, the bulletin boards where you could
write like, you know, like, write something.
Yeah, like forms and blogs. Right, that's so I got in there
and I said, how do I tell my cheating, my cheating husband to
get out? And I got all these answers and
it was like, OK, there's support here.
So And I told them the story. I just, and I gave them the
story I just gave you. And they were like, oh, they had
very uncomplimentary things to say about him.
And they were supportive. And they confirmed that it
wasn't my fault and that I was worthy of being free of
something like that. And oppressed is what some of my
friends who knew him said. But I went out and I started
going places. I went places with friends.
I do community theater and I do costuming and acting when I get
a chance to act. And so I, I had that to go with
and, and work on and just get it.
I didn't stay in the house and and whine.
I got up and out and I immediately started looking for
dating. I said, I've got 25, I'm 25
years behind. I gotta get heroin.
Yeah. And one thing that a lot of
people do is they look at they, they invest a lot of energy.
I don't want to really say time, but a lot of energy is invested
in the wrong areas of time. So in your case, you could have
invested that energy into moping, complaining, sitting
around and just being miserable. Or you could have directed it
into going and doing things for yourself.
Like you said, you wanted to get into the theater stuff.
You wanted to go out and be with friends and start dating again.
And while you were behind 25 years, like I've, I've learned
to view time as more of a communication tool, whereas a
lot of people use time as a means of it.
It's it's interchangeable with the word experience.
So you've had all of this experience, all of these
experiences with your husband and you never really got to know
who he really was or what he really liked or anything like
that. So you didn't really miss out,
you know, on too much in terms of time, but more so just
different experiences. And I'm sure in that short
amount of time that you've been with your now husband, it's been
exponentially greater because of the experiences you've had more
so than how much time you've spent with each other.
I can certainly approve and it was just it's, it's my second
husband's, my husband now it's his second marriage as well.
So we've both brought do's and don'ts.
I hear that the second marriage is always better than the 1st.
Well, I can't say for everybody else, but I know the two of us
are very happy. We we have said it.
We're sorry it took us so long to find our soul mate.
In the love. Of our life.
So he proposed six weeks after we met.
Oh, wow, so when you know, you know, and like I said, that goes
back to the time thing, like the experiences that you two had
have must have been just phenomenal together.
And then for him to be like, alright, I I know I want to
spend the rest of my life with you.
So let's get to it. And here's what we're going to
do. Here's what we're not going to
do. Where's your list?
Well. The funny thing was is when we
met, we met online. And that's what I'm going to
touch on too, is do not limit yourself if you're diagnosed
with herpes. It is not a hair shirt.
You do not. It's not a scarlet letter.
Don't limit yourself. If you're more comfortable,
especially the beginning with the positive sites, that's fine.
Wet your feet, get out there. But if you're not.
But if you once you settle down, you think you know what?
Don't label yourself. Yeah, get out there on Main
Street. Inside.
There are a lot who automatically announce on their
profile that they've got herpes, and there are a lot who don't
say anything. But that doesn't mean don't go
out there and see who's there. And there's really no reason,
unless you think that they're going to be an intimate
situation with them, there's no reason to disclose.
Yeah. And, and we did a previous
episode and the title of it was Dating with herpes is just like
dating, you know, with or without herpes.
You deal with the same kind of shit.
So why limit yourself to the drama where herpes is removed
from it when you can deal with the drama, you know, and, and
herpes is either going to make it in faster or it's going to
get to where it's supposed to be sooner.
You know, as a result of that, like, you know, if someone's
with you regardless and you're not, you know, really wasting
any time. But I, I, and I used to be like
that too, Like I was, I thought that dating other people who
only had herpes was it was safe. It was emotionally safe.
And of course it's physically responsible because now you're
not spreading the virus. And I use air quotes when I say
that. But in it would have limited me
because my current girlfriend had I not, you know, been brave
enough to disclose to her. Like we met in real life and
talked for a while, went on a date.
I decided, all right, you know, I think I should tell her, yeah,
I plan on being intimate with her.
So I told her I was like, hey, you know, here's the situation.
I have herpes. I have genital HSV 2.
This is what it means for me. Here's how I manage it.
This is what it means to you, should we decide to be intimate.
And left it at that. And then all out of nowhere, you
know, several minutes later, I get a response back from her.
It's like, there's never really right time to say this. dot,
dot, dot me, too. And I was like, oh shit, you
know, now had I stayed on? The dating sites, I may have
never met her and it's, you know, it's not been long.
I think we've been together, yeah, it's been about four
months now, but things are going really, really well.
And I, I wouldn't have met this phenomenal person that I'm with
had I not had I limited myself, let's say that.
Well, I asked for Joe, my my husband now and you'll I may
refer to my to Joe and more than one both of my husband's names
Joe. You have a type.
No, not necessarily. It's just happened that way.
Makes conversation confusing sometimes, but.
We can call him Joe too. I'm sorry, we can call him Joe
too. But when I'm when I met him and
it looked like it was going to go more than just friends, we I
made him go ticket tested. I said, and I told him I sat him
down and I said this is what it is.
I sat next to him in the sofa and I said I have something to
tell you before we go any further.
And I said through no fault of my own, I contracted herpes.
It is an inconvenient skin disease and it is non curable.
It is a virus but it does not affect me except every once in a
while I'll maybe have an outbreak.
I guess I can transmit it. It is not my fluids, it is by
skin to skin contact. I you know, and I was, I was not
ashamed. I came, I did not come across
ashamed. Are we still?
We're we're here, yeah. OK, I did not come across
apologetic. I just said facts to facts.
I said here's a couple of websites if you want to go take
a look at it before you give me an answer, if you want to
continue. But I wanted to let you know at
this point so you we don't go any further 'cause I really like
you and I think we could really make this work.
And he looked and he got the blood test and he was free of
anything and he looked, he said I don't need to go on and look
at it up. Anything.
He goes, I'm not going anywhere. This doesn't make you who you
are. I don't care.
Yeah. And that was three weeks, 4
weeks before he proposed. Yeah, so.
So he was certain, he was sure of himself and absolute certain
in in dating. And I only can speak from my own
personal experience and the experiences of other people who
shared their experience with me. But like when I was out dating
after my diagnosis, like I was very indecisive.
I thought I wanted one thing. I thought I wanted something
else. I tried something new and I
realize a lot of those relationships or a lot of those
encounters, let's call them that didn't last or work out because
I was indecisive about what it was that I wanted.
And I never really cat tail. There's a cat walking by the
screen. That was just funny.
That was like 1. Of my cats, yeah.
So I, I had just never taken the time to really sit down and go
over what it was that I wanted. And I tell a lot of people now,
you know, you really want to look for decisiveness in a
partner because that indecisiveness is like that,
that, that hesitance is really it's, it's a lot of people still
wonder what's on the other side. Like does the grass look greener
on the other side? And like, would you say that
him, Joe, too, being as decisive as he was about you was one of
the things that more so made you feel like I made the right
decision in opening up, disclosing to this person?
Yes. The funny thing is when we both
met, we said, well, we neither one of us had any intention of
ever getting married again. So and he kept saying, well, I
want to move to the next level. We'll want to move to the next
level. And I'm thinking there's no more
levels after this, you know, You know what, what more can we do?
And I'm thinking, we've already said we don't want to get
married again. But he was, he was very
decisive. He was very sure of who he
wanted, what he wanted. And The funny thing is he had
talked to his, he stayed friends with his ex-wife.
And he said, oh, by the way, he says, my ex-wife wants to meet
you. I've talked about you.
And she says, well, bring her over.
Let's meet her already. That is fucking weird, I'm not
gonna lie. That is weird it.
Was and it was supposed to be like the day we went on an
actual first date but we spent the weeks that took the second
was the 2nd date and she was engaged and he brought me in and
we got introduced and we became fast friends.
She passed away a couple years after we got together and I was
very sorry to see her, but she got cancer and she passed away
and we were good friends. She was a lovely lady and so
accepting and just it also the fact that he brought me into his
family. He has two grown children and
one in heaven and I have two grown children.
So the fact that he brought me into his family so quickly made
me real, you know, made me understand that he accepted me
as I was. He wanted to share me that I
wasn't something to keep behind closed doors.
Yeah. And that's to me, that's very
sexy that somebody want is so happy with you and so proud of
you. And they want you to say, hey,
she's mine. Mm, hmm.
And especially I think it's hard cause a lot of us when we first
find out about herpes, we feel like we're damaged goods.
And when somebody doesn't treat you that way, that is like, wow,
this is great. Yeah, it it can give you a false
perception of what being treated amazing is because like when you
feel like you're damaged goods, anything that comes along and
treats you otherwise, it just feels so much better.
And it's like when you do finally get to a point where
you're accept, you've accepted yourself and then someone comes
along with that average shit, like you don't want any parts of
it. You're more dismissive towards
them. You'll start to tell people I
have herpes in hopes that they just go away.
And then at that point you're it's been very.
Handy a couple of times for me, yeah, but.
But it's just you. You have higher standards when
you get to that place. Herpes is, you know.
You can go out and do a lot of dating and seeing a lot of
people. Let's see how this turns out and
you make stay in the relationship longer just because
you've got nothing else to do. You know, you get to look with
herpes since it's such an well, if I'm going to become intimate
with this person, is there a chance is there that attraction
and do I see the potential for long term?
Yeah, if you. Know it's a lot easier to cut it
off a lot sooner because when you decide what you want, you
say, Gee, you know, I don't see this going anywhere.
Let's just end it rather than you know, so that saves you also
having that very, very nerve wracking talk the talk with
someone about it. And like I said, once you feel
like you're gonna be intimate, there's no reason for them to
know. That's none of you know that's a
nunya. Nunya, I haven't heard that in
such a long time. Oh, so you're you're happy now?
You've gone through the you've gone through the divorce that's
taken care of. You're in your second marriage.
You 2 been together for did you say 7 years, almost seven years.
Congratulations again. Like that's that's phenomenal
for you to have found love, you know, at at an age where a lot
of people just say, oh, I'm damaged goods, I'm old.
No one's gonna want me. Like you've you've pushed
through. Get out there.
I think it takes more for women. To be honest.
To get out there not, you know, not that we're so much more
special than men, but I think something like this makes just
that more, much more vulnerable. Yes.
Especially if we've been hurt by someone, we'll kind of go.
Maybe I don't want to take a chance.
Mm. Hmm.
It. It does take us a certain amount
of bravery to get out there at night.
And the age. Plus a diagnosis of herpes.
Yeah. So, and like, I think that it
just takes the experiences to the, the, the negative
experiences more so equip you with what you need so that
you're ready for the positive experiences so that you can
recognize and move forward accordingly.
Because a friend of mine always say, you know, if you get
something too soon before you're ready for it, all you do is fuck
it up. So yeah, you got to just learn
to appreciate the bad experiences.
Like I've learned to appreciate my herpes and appreciate all of
the missed opportunities and things that I've had because I
wouldn't have been ready to be where I am now.
I wouldn't have been ready to launch this podcast or be the
way that I am with it, or for it to be as successful as it is at
this point, or even be where I am in my relationship with my
friendships and my career. All of these things.
And it just it it you, you have to really appreciate those bad
experiences because they are the what you need in order to move
on and experience the positive ones.
They're your reference points what you will accept what you
won't accept, what your ideal is.
And just before you said ask me, but, you know, I told you that
herpes is probably one of the best things that ever happened
to me. And people are gonna go, Oh, no,
she doesn't mean that. Yes, I do.
Because having this to share, to find out information to, you
know, contact other people to exchange stories, it brought me
into a whole different world. Yeah.
And. A and a.
You know, it's all walks of life.
It's all financial resources. It's all religions.
Let me tell you, herpes gets rid of a lot of divisiveness.
Yeah, because you've got this common goal.
You know, it's like, how do I deal with this?
And I have so many friends now online in real life, and I have
met them because of herpes. I would never have met them
otherwise. I have traveled to other states.
I have gone and met people, shared a house in the mountains
for a weekend. I would never have done any of
this. You shared you shared toilet
seats and drinks. Drinks, you know, bottle of
wine, swinging it around the room, you know, it's and it's
been so much fun. It's been so much more positive
part of the expression, the negatives.
So it was, it really was a life changer for the good.
Yeah. And but you gotta reach a
certain mindset, acceptance, you've gotta say basically is
this is not what defines me. This is not a big portion of who
I am. It's just something I got.
Yeah. And it's controllable for the
most part. You won't die from it.
You may get a little uncomfortable at times, but that
could be taken care of and treated too.
The most uncomfortable part of it, I think is, is, is how you
think about it. Yeah, yeah.
It's just a constant battle that can go on inside your mind
unless you decide to just end the war.
Like the the best way to do that is just come to terms with it,
be accepting of it. And the only power that it has
over you is really what you think other people are gonna
think about you because you have it.
And once you're able to let go of that, like there's there's
nothing there. There's the freedom to recognize
what you need to do, the self reflection and being able to
just go on and live your life. So and.
There's no and there shouldn't be any shame or guilt behind it,
aside from those people who haven't know it and then go out
and act irresponsibly, which is a shameful thing if you have no
integrity like that. None of us got it by choice.
All trust of the person we were with.
And for what other reason? If they didn't know, well, they
can't help it. If they didn't know.
Mm, Hmm. Sometimes it just happens like
that. But if they know, that's on
them. But you have, you have to have
the integrity to tell them. It's only fair.
Yeah. You know.
Be straight up. Yeah, the talk is rough and
sometimes people leave skid marks going out the door.
But. A lot of them stay.
It's like any relationship. Relationships end all the time.
Even those who people of herpes and not because of herpes.
Yeah. Just normal relationship stuff.
Now we're. Not aliens.
We're, we're at a point now where we can start to wrap this
up. Teresa, last question I have is
one that I already know the answer to, but being that you're
61 and you've had HSV one and two for the last nine years, are
you open about your status? Yes, since day one.
Since day one, you've been open. I'll be honest, I was so
devastated that, you know, I said not only did my husband
cheat on me, he gave me herpes. And some people were stunned
that I would come out and say it.
And some were like, oh, you know what?
I have it too. And like I said, you know, I
tell people about it and if they have any questions, I use it as
a teachable moment. And hopefully they'll pass it on
to somebody else, the information on the herpes so
that somebody else will be educated and eventually it'll be
just like a cold. Oh, I have a cold.
Oh, I have herpes. It's a virus.
And there's no stigma attached. Yeah.
Well, I personally thank you so
much for taking the time to speak with me and Share your
story and really shed some light on anyone who just may been
maybe can relate to you. Whether it be age wise,
personality wise, career wise, or something in this story is
able to really help someone cope with their own diagnosis or even
help them with getting through the way that they feel about it
'cause I mean, I will say that coming out about my own
condition and talking about my experiences and talking to other
people who had similar experiences has really it's,
it's disintegrated the barriers between us that are created,
such as race, different cultures or income, career fields,
religious beliefs, just like you said.
So like coming together on this has really brought a lot of
people together. And I think that it's awesome
when we're able to talk to one another about our personal
experiences and connect and relate in being so vulnerable
because there's such strength in that vulnerability.
And if I, I just feel like more of us should be able to
experience it. So if nothing else, I mean, I
and I always, I say this pretty often for someone to just find
someone that they trust and that they really feel that they can
trust and just start telling that person.
And it gets easier and easier with experience really.
Gets a lot easier. Yeah, one step, first person you
tell the next person isn't as difficult.
Yeah, and so on. It it it gets addicting I.
Would put on a bulletin board, you know, 'cause there are
people who just don't need to know.
Yeah. But you're right now, and I'm
happy to help it anyway. I know how hard it is to go
through those early days and this help.
This helps anyone in any way that I'm so glad.
That's awesome. Alright, so we're gonna, I don't
think we need to edit anything so I can just post this up like
now. Honestly.
I appreciate you again taking the time to speak with me.
Is there anything else that you want to leave us with?
You've already left us with a lot of gems.
Yeah, I think I pretty much said plenty.
OK, awesome. Well, you can go on and say bye
to everyone. Goodbye.
Alright guys and. And be happy.
Be happy. Yeah, that's important.
Alright, guys, this concludes this episode of Something
Positive for Positive People with Teresa.
I can be found on Instagram, Twitter and Tumblr at H on my
chest or you can follow, you know, add me on Facebook.
I've found that a few people have been doing that lately.
I'm just Courtney brain. I'm wearing a given 100 T-shirt
in my profile picture and I it I think it's in black and white
and I'm looking off to the left or something.
It's real poetic. Like it's probably one of my
favorite pictures, so you can find me on any of those.
If you or someone wants to share their personal story about their
own experience with an SCD or dating someone with one, or if
you have any questions at all or want to be connected to any
local groups or communities in your area, please don't hesitate
to reach out. And just remember, you're not
alone in this. There are plenty of people out
there who feel the same way you do or going through what you're
going through, who have been through what you're going
through and have made it to the other side.
And it just takes, I don't want to say time, it takes
experiences before you get to a point where you're able to come
to terms with it. And we all have our different
paths of experiences and different collections of
experiences that get us to where where you've come to terms with
it and accept ourselves. So till next time, stay
positive. Peace.