1 00:00:01,360 --> 00:00:04,240 We make sure to stay recording. All right, Green light, blue 2 00:00:04,240 --> 00:00:05,760 light. Welcome to Something Positive 3 00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:07,720 for Positive People. I'm Courtney Brain. 4 00:00:08,080 --> 00:00:11,400 Something Positive for Positive People is a 501-C3 nonprofit 5 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:14,360 organization supporting people navigating herpes stigma in a 6 00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:18,040 variety of ways. One of those is primarily 7 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:20,880 support calls. There have been a lot of support 8 00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:24,040 calls coming in, so I've been very, very busy with those. 9 00:00:24,640 --> 00:00:27,800 I'm grateful to the healthcare professionals and mental health 10 00:00:27,800 --> 00:00:31,160 professionals, educators and people who have been referring 11 00:00:31,160 --> 00:00:34,120 people to something positive for positive people. 12 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:39,320 Shout out to the AI platforms for being very forthcoming and 13 00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:42,000 having people reach out to something positive or positive 14 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:46,200 people because I've been busy. Like for perspective, in 15 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:49,360 January, I think there were 70 calls that were signed up for 16 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:51,680 February, around around 70 as well. 17 00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:54,520 So yeah, urban days, I've had like 8 in a day. 18 00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:59,880 So I'm busy and I'm managing the support groups which meet on 19 00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:03,400 Mondays at 7:30 PM Eastern Time. The women's group is the 1st and 20 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:06,640 3rd Monday, the men's group is the 2nd and 4th, and if there is 21 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:11,280 a fifth Monday, then we will have something that is blended 22 00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:14,360 so both groups will meet. You still register for those the 23 00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:18,360 same way you make a donation to that support group that you are 24 00:01:18,360 --> 00:01:21,480 affiliated with and then you'll get the calendar invite for it. 25 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:24,680 If you were somebody who has not attended a support group before 26 00:01:24,680 --> 00:01:27,520 and you want to be a part of it, we have to just have a 27 00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:32,040 one-on-one support call first so that I'm able to make sure that 28 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,640 you're getting what it is that you need from the support group. 29 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:37,840 You know what it is that you're signing up for and all the stuff 30 00:01:37,840 --> 00:01:40,400 that people wouldn't read if I were to put it on the website. 31 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:42,720 And I'll be able to answer some questions for you, right? 32 00:01:43,360 --> 00:01:48,680 I got called out for I called out by a credible source, one of 33 00:01:48,680 --> 00:01:53,560 my board members for my last few podcast episodes seeming like 34 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:57,560 Diaries or or journal entries, which I was like, damn, you're 35 00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:01,440 right. I can't even see that And I, I 36 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:03,000 don't want to say I'm running out of shit to talk about. 37 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:06,680 I think that I've been really playing it safe in terms of what 38 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,840 I share. I'm much more comfortable with a 39 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:12,960 guest and getting them to talk about their experiences and 40 00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:16,200 pulling that out of people. And then moving forward, just 41 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:19,760 sharing bits and pieces of my own personal experiences within 42 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:21,840 that. So if you listen to this and you 43 00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:26,440 feel compelled to share your experience, your story, living 44 00:02:26,440 --> 00:02:29,760 with herpes and how navigating that has been for you, please 45 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:33,680 don't hesitate to reach out. Let me know if we can get you 46 00:02:33,920 --> 00:02:35,560 the same way. We're doing this right here that 47 00:02:35,560 --> 00:02:38,440 I'm recording. We can have you as a guest on 48 00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:41,720 the podcast because people want to hear from others. 49 00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:46,480 People want to hear others lived experiences and not everybody 50 00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:50,280 really wants to share. So I would say for every 98 51 00:02:50,360 --> 00:02:54,200 people who say that they want to hear other people's experiences, 52 00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:59,640 there might be two that are for every 100 people, 98 want to 53 00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:02,240 hear people's experiences and only two are willing to share 54 00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:05,960 their experiences. So I'm, I'm going to be real, 55 00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:11,760 like I am impacted by herpes in such a way that is completely 56 00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:14,480 and significantly different than a lot of other people. 57 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:19,480 If you're watching this or listening to this, you'll see 58 00:03:19,480 --> 00:03:22,680 that I'm not, you know, in my normal background, right? 59 00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:31,280 I have taken the opportunity to view herpes in a completely 60 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:34,160 different way than what we're told to. 61 00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:37,160 Look at it. As I talk about identity 62 00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:42,000 fragmentation and how if we just take a circle and how a circle 63 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:46,160 has 360°, think about those as different aspects of our 64 00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:49,360 personality, who we are ourselves, our roles that we 65 00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:54,000 play in the lives of others. And imagine that having herpes 66 00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:58,160 is just one of those degrees and the way that we dictate our life 67 00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:03,320 around that 1° and making that affect the other 359 aspects of 68 00:04:03,320 --> 00:04:07,080 our circle. That's what we can do. 69 00:04:07,320 --> 00:04:09,720 And I think a lot of people do that unconsciously. 70 00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:16,000 I have done it much more consciously and that, yeah, when 71 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:18,839 it comes to dating and navigating the conversation, 72 00:04:18,839 --> 00:04:21,519 Like, I don't have a problem telling people I have herpes. 73 00:04:21,839 --> 00:04:25,560 I have a problem with what comes after that because then I become 74 00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:31,240 a motherfucking therapist rather than somebody that you know is 75 00:04:31,320 --> 00:04:35,760 on the prospect list of dating or hooking up with. 76 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:41,680 So I have the problem of people more so gravitating towards me 77 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:46,040 when I tell them I have herpes and I end up somehow telling 78 00:04:46,040 --> 00:04:48,520 them what I do. And then like that's it's kind 79 00:04:48,520 --> 00:04:53,920 of like shut off at that point. So that is my experience and 80 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:58,920 literally nobody that comes in for a support call is ready to 81 00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:03,480 hear that or can relate to that. And it's so far away. 82 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:08,600 It's so far removed that if I were to, you know, tell these 83 00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:11,360 people that like it's, it's unbelievable. 84 00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:13,360 And I got to be real mindful of that. 85 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:19,800 I try to not, you know, talk too much about my own experiences on 86 00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:22,320 support calls because I want for people to make that about 87 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:26,680 themselves. I had one that was with a young 88 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:29,960 man who straight up told me he was like, I don't want to do 89 00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:33,560 this. And you take that the way that 90 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:36,680 you would take it. But he, he seemed like he really 91 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:39,040 didn't want to do this. And for those who don't know, 92 00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:41,440 when I started something positive for positive people 93 00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:45,200 nine years ago, there was a woman who was in a relationship 94 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:47,320 with someone. She had just tested positive for 95 00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:50,080 herpes, no symptoms. And she and I had become 96 00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:51,760 friends. We've met on the dating app for 97 00:05:51,760 --> 00:05:55,280 people with herpes. And she just wanted to be ready 98 00:05:55,280 --> 00:05:59,640 for when or if he, her boyfriend had any symptoms at all. 99 00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:03,320 And this is someone who, you know, was in a relationship, was 100 00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:06,040 attractive, had a good job, and over time, we had become 101 00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:07,680 friends. And I remember her telling me 102 00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:09,640 that she, too, wanted to end her life. 103 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:12,760 And when she said that, I was just, I was shocked. 104 00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:16,440 I didn't understand, like, why you you got the relationship, 105 00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:18,520 you don't have symptoms. You just found out about this 106 00:06:18,520 --> 00:06:20,440 information and now you don't want to be here. 107 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:25,720 And for this person, it felt like kind of a flashback, like a 108 00:06:25,720 --> 00:06:31,160 reminder of why I show up to this, like why I continue to do 109 00:06:31,160 --> 00:06:34,200 the work that I do. Because in this young man's 110 00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:36,800 case, it was very similar. He didn't have the relationship 111 00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:40,160 necessarily, but he has a support system. 112 00:06:40,160 --> 00:06:43,280 He has family, he has friends, he has people around him that he 113 00:06:43,280 --> 00:06:46,560 feels very supported by. But there's something still 114 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:49,200 there that, you know, he, he doesn't want to do this. 115 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:52,800 And when we were having a conversation and he shared with 116 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:57,640 me that he had called the suicide lifeline and that they 117 00:06:57,640 --> 00:07:03,280 said, you know, it's not the end of the world, that gave me a 118 00:07:03,280 --> 00:07:06,560 feeling of anger. Because that's literally the 119 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:10,520 equivalent of saying something to a person that is so far 120 00:07:10,520 --> 00:07:13,080 removed. Like you're, you're, they're so 121 00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:16,120 far removed from everything's going to be OK. 122 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:19,120 Eventually you'll be over this. You're going to find someone to 123 00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:21,200 love. You don't nobody, ain't nobody 124 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:25,800 even receive that at this point. No one can receive it at that 125 00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:29,800 stage of where they are in their diagnosis, right? 126 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:32,400 Like if somebody's talking about they want to end their lives 127 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:34,920 because of their herpes diagnosis, the last thing that 128 00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:39,320 they want to hear is, you know, something that's so far removed 129 00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:43,080 from their imagination. And I'm not a mental health 130 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:47,920 professional, I'm not a doctor. I'm just somebody who actually 131 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:51,000 engages with and talks to people one-on-one to understand what it 132 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,680 is that they're feeling, how they're thinking, and what their 133 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:57,760 behaviors are. And I, I believe that that's not 134 00:07:57,760 --> 00:08:00,400 helpful. It's not helpful to hear. 135 00:08:00,920 --> 00:08:02,560 It'll be all right. It's not the end of the world 136 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:05,520 because it is the end of the world. 137 00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:08,200 It's the end of your world as you know it. 138 00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:12,080 Yes, things are going to change, and the reason that they're 139 00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:15,440 going to change is most likely because things needed to change 140 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:20,160 and they haven't changed. And that's really what this 141 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:23,560 comes down to. The nervous system is going to 142 00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:27,560 gently whisper to you when things are out of alignment. 143 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:30,520 Maybe you can't hear it because your awareness isn't in your 144 00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:33,799 nervous system, because your awareness is out there. 145 00:08:33,799 --> 00:08:36,640 It's at work, it's with your friends, it's your social life, 146 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:38,840 your family, whatever else you got going on. 147 00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:40,600 Or maybe it's your relationships. 148 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:43,000 Your awareness is in your relationships and your 149 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:47,440 relationships are generally impacted by your sexuality. 150 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:52,240 Your sexualities tends to be something that revolves around 151 00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,680 your genitals. And so when the nervous system 152 00:08:54,680 --> 00:08:58,360 can't get your attention in the sense of, hey, we're just 153 00:08:58,360 --> 00:09:00,040 regulated, hey, this isn't normal. 154 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,600 Hey, we need to get away from over here. 155 00:09:01,600 --> 00:09:02,960 Hey, can you pay attention to me? 156 00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:05,920 All right, What are you paying attention to? 157 00:09:06,920 --> 00:09:09,080 Oh, you're paying attention to your genitals. 158 00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:11,120 Let me see if I can get your attention there. 159 00:09:11,680 --> 00:09:16,200 Boom, herpes. I I know how ridiculous that can 160 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:18,440 sound to somebody who's not really ready to hear that. 161 00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:21,520 But it's relatable. I know that it's relatable 162 00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:24,720 because, you know, I'll ask people, hey, were there any red 163 00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:27,480 flags around the person that you think might have given it to you 164 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:29,640 or what was going on in your life around that time? 165 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:34,040 And I give this exercise to people called Nurture Your 166 00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:36,960 Nature. And the idea is for you to 167 00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:41,280 identify what your nature is, who you are, and then begin to 168 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:44,320 look at ways that you nurture that aspect of yourself. 169 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:49,840 So rather than asking people who are you, right, it's more of 170 00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:51,320 like, well, what are you made of? 171 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:53,720 And I'll mean like skin, bones, teeth, whatever. 172 00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:58,600 What I mean is I want you to see the parts of yourself that are 173 00:09:58,600 --> 00:10:02,680 not seen, that you cannot visibly see or physically touch, 174 00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:07,200 hear, taste, smell, right, but are to be perceived and 175 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:11,240 experienced not just by others, but by you. 176 00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:13,600 How do you experience yourself? What is yourself? 177 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:17,680 What are you made of? And I, I try not to lead people 178 00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:21,360 with my own examples, but I have these eight CS curiosity, 179 00:10:21,560 --> 00:10:25,800 choice, challenge, connection, creativity, community, 180 00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:29,240 completion, consistency. Oh, what's that Them all. 181 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:30,800 I usually have to stop and think about it. 182 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:37,880 But those are like my 8 CS of self that I believe are my 183 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:40,160 nature. And there's three places that 184 00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:43,320 these tend to come out, and that's work, rest and play. 185 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,480 So how am I expressing my curiosity in work? 186 00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:48,560 I ask questions, I interview people, literally. 187 00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:50,800 I ask people about their experiences with their 188 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:55,280 diagnosis. How am I experiencing connection 189 00:10:55,280 --> 00:11:01,520 and play, sex, relationships, intimacy and a shared activity 190 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,960 where there's like a game being played, right? 191 00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:07,120 Or there's some type of a goal, right? 192 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:11,600 How am I experiencing? What's another one completion 193 00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:15,440 through rest, right? I do a lot of things yoga, 194 00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:20,000 certified in yoga, but I'm more so practicing for myself. 195 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:23,720 I'm in yoga therapy training. I teach medical students to give 196 00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:26,760 genital exams in order to play the in order to pay the bills. 197 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:28,520 I've been running something positive. 198 00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:33,360 I do the support calls, support groups, I'm also doing events. 199 00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:39,000 I'm also building community, right? 200 00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:42,160 So throughout the day, throughout the week, throughout 201 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,760 the month, throughout the year, all of this is going on. 202 00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:50,160 And for me to really complete the cycles of everything that I 203 00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:51,840 do, I have to make space to rest. 204 00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:58,480 And so completion to me looks like being able to rest, right? 205 00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:02,240 Like if you are biblically inclined, on the 7th day of 206 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:11,200 creation, source rested. And that to me is how I nurture 207 00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:14,280 my nature. I nurture my nature by through 208 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:17,120 those vehicles of engagement with the world. 209 00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:20,800 Like that's how I see myself, that's how I experience myself 210 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:23,880 and express myself, and that's how others experience me as 211 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:27,800 well. And so that exercise helps 212 00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:31,760 people to begin to validate their own identity outside of 213 00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:34,080 how they see themselves in that sexual aspect. 214 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:37,200 Because again, going back to the circle, there's 360°. 215 00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:39,560 Imagine a low notch at every degree. 216 00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:43,040 And if you pick one of those and that's your herpes diagnosis, 217 00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:45,600 imagine if you just like put it to the side and you just looked 218 00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:49,280 at the circle, you would see 359 things about yourself that have 219 00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:52,760 nothing to do with herpes. And we limit ourselves so much 220 00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:56,720 into identifying with that piece that it makes it difficult for 221 00:12:56,720 --> 00:13:03,600 us to see beyond what the, the physical limitations of dating, 222 00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:07,640 relating and connecting with people in ways that have nothing 223 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:09,600 to do with sex at all or intimacy. 224 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:13,560 So I, I, I challenge people. And if this is something that, 225 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:17,240 you know, you feel compelled to do, like take that, you know, 226 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:21,080 nurture your nature because you should be able to do that for 227 00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:23,320 yourself. You should recognize, like what 228 00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:27,160 of those invisible aspects of yourself that need to be 229 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:32,560 nurtured, that are your nature? What are they and how do you go 230 00:13:32,560 --> 00:13:34,120 about it? Because you know, we do talk 231 00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:36,680 about self-care and it's not take a bubble bath. 232 00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:40,360 It's not go have a drink. It's not, you know, eat food, 233 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:42,120 right? Like that's, that's survival 234 00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:44,160 stuff like you should be cleaning yourself. 235 00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:46,720 You should be eating right. If you're able to listen to this 236 00:13:46,720 --> 00:13:48,880 podcast, you should be able to do the bare minimum for 237 00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:52,400 survival. So I, I'm not going to give you 238 00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:56,280 no kudos and a pat on the back because you take care of 239 00:13:56,280 --> 00:14:01,680 yourself at minimum of what you need to be doing for yourself to 240 00:14:01,680 --> 00:14:04,720 nurture your nature. Unfortunately, is something that 241 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:09,040 really we're away from. We're very far disconnected from 242 00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:11,240 being able to. We don't even recognize who we 243 00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:13,600 are because there are so many things that pull our awareness 244 00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:17,520 away from the nervous system of being able to pick up on those 245 00:14:17,560 --> 00:14:20,720 early signals that something in our lives needs to change. 246 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,400 Whether that be the environments that we're in, whether it be the 247 00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:26,600 people we're around, whether it be the career field that we're 248 00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:28,760 in. So all of these different 249 00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:33,880 aspects of engagement can really influence and encourage, 250 00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:36,560 discourage what it is, is happening with our nervous 251 00:14:36,560 --> 00:14:39,600 system, which is constantly telling us, hey, this is the 252 00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:43,680 direction that we want to go. So when our nervous system is 253 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:46,680 not in alignment or if something's not in alignment 254 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:49,360 with our behaviours, then the nervous system's going to speak. 255 00:14:49,360 --> 00:14:51,200 And a lot of times we'll, we'll shove that down. 256 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:53,120 But like, I don't have time to deal with that right now. 257 00:14:54,120 --> 00:14:56,720 And we got to not do that. We got to bring that awareness 258 00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:59,080 into the body. I have an exercise I'm not 259 00:14:59,080 --> 00:15:02,760 thinking giving away these exercises, but when we get so in 260 00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:06,200 our heads and in our minds about our herpes diagnosis, something 261 00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:09,720 as simple as observing your hand and looking at your hand and 262 00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:12,080 noticing how many fingers you have. 263 00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:15,440 Notice the movement, notice the coloration, notice the length of 264 00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:19,120 your nails, the coloration of your nails, those little lines 265 00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:21,240 that that spiral your fingerprints, right? 266 00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:23,680 Notice how many lines you have in your hand. 267 00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:26,640 Can you count them? What do your knuckles feel like? 268 00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:30,120 What does your hand feel like? And in that time, you've been 269 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:34,840 able to disidentify away from what is happening in your 270 00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:38,200 thoughts between past and future and you're able to ground in 271 00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:40,440 your your body and look at what's happening in the present 272 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,760 moment. So I'm giving away all this free 273 00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:44,080 game. So nothing else. 274 00:15:44,080 --> 00:15:47,880 It should encourage you to A, attend an event. 275 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:51,920 B attend the support group. C Sign up for one of the support 276 00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:56,160 calls to be able to take this where it can go for you if you 277 00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:59,120 are somebody who is in fact looking for and seeking support. 278 00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:03,240 So the exercise of nurturing my nature means looking at those 279 00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:07,080 intangible aspects of yourself and recognizing those as your 280 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:11,400 nature outside of your body, outside of the things that you 281 00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:15,000 do, looking at what it means to be who you are, right. 282 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:20,200 So take that and do what you will with it and just remember 283 00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:23,880 that at any given moment you can check in with yourself and be 284 00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:27,400 where you are and in this moment and away from the thoughts that 285 00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:31,160 send you in every kind of chaotic, different direction. 286 00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:34,320 That's where anxiety is. That's where jealousy is. 287 00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:37,360 That's where the lack of self worth. 288 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:40,600 That's where this sense of incompleteness is. 289 00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:44,400 Because realistically, a lot of us when we get our diagnosis, we 290 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:47,960 haven't really had experiences to measure up against the 291 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:52,160 beliefs that we've adopted about ourselves now that we have this 292 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:54,320 diagnosis. We haven't, we haven't. 293 00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:56,640 There are people I talked to were diagnosed a week ago. 294 00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:59,120 I'm like, well, what, what's how's herpes impacted you? 295 00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:03,040 And then it's like, well, now that I have this, it's like, 296 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:08,040 well, you probably had it longer than since you found out, 297 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,800 realistically. So what's the difference between 298 00:17:11,079 --> 00:17:14,040 when you might have been exposed up to the point where you 299 00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:17,359 thought that you had herpes? Like what's changed about you 300 00:17:17,359 --> 00:17:21,240 since then? And that's what I mean with the 301 00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:23,599 curiosity. I just, I just ask people, I ask 302 00:17:23,599 --> 00:17:26,079 people questions, I challenge their belief systems because 303 00:17:26,079 --> 00:17:28,960 that's all we have. You'll sit here and, and have 304 00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:34,680 10s of thousands of thoughts that if you just take an action 305 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:40,960 can nullify those, you know, and, and my hands right here. 306 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:43,440 If I sit here and I tell myself I can never close my fist, I 307 00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:44,800 will never be able to close my fist. 308 00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:46,400 My hands just open. It's always open. 309 00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,840 The more I'm saying that, the less any action is being taken. 310 00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:52,400 Nothing's happening. My hands just here open because 311 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:54,320 that's what I'm thinking. That's what I'm saying and 312 00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:56,960 that's what I'm doing. But at any given, oh, look what 313 00:17:56,960 --> 00:18:00,240 just happened, Any given moment you can just close your fist, 314 00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:05,280 right? Take the action. 315 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:08,960 That action is going to deter the beliefs. 316 00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:11,360 It's going to disrupt the thoughts. 317 00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:13,520 Now, I can open my hand when I want to. 318 00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:15,720 I can close it. But if I sit here and I just 319 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,360 tell myself I'll never be able to do this, I'll never be able 320 00:18:18,360 --> 00:18:21,920 to take that action. The thoughts have to stop 321 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:27,440 because this disrupts them. The same thing goes for living 322 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:31,440 with a herpes diagnosis, right? To say I can't do this, it's 323 00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:33,480 like, no, you're, you're actually doing it. 324 00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:35,240 Like, I don't want to be here anymore. 325 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,760 Well, you're, you're here. Like, let's, let's talk about 326 00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:38,440 that. Like why? 327 00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:42,840 What's so out of alignment for you that you don't want to 328 00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:50,800 experience the the full spectrum of this body of your ability to 329 00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:57,440 engage with the world, the other 359 aspects of engagement, 330 00:18:57,560 --> 00:18:59,840 right. Sex is one way of engaging with 331 00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:02,800 this big beautiful life. If sex is all you got going for 332 00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:06,000 you, I'm sorry. I'm, I'm so sorry to hear that. 333 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:17,800 If sex is the only thing that you have going for you, I, I am 334 00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:23,120 sorry and I also need to challenge that. 335 00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:29,880 I also need to challenge that because that's not the case, 336 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:34,200 right? If we look at our roles in life, 337 00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:36,800 like there's identities that we have, maybe some of us are 338 00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:39,920 parents or siblings. We're children of someone, 339 00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:42,880 grandchildren of someone. We got ancestors, right? 340 00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:47,000 We're descendants of someone. There's the work, rest and play. 341 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:49,960 So we rest who we are and play who we are. 342 00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:54,640 Maybe you identify as a dancer or a singer or performer artist. 343 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:58,640 Maybe you are someone who's a worker, an entrepreneur, you're 344 00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:02,120 an employee, you're a Co worker, right That that's. 345 00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:06,240 Probably a dozen things right there that I just spit out 346 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:10,480 randomly. So for you to no longer want to 347 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:14,800 be here because of this one degree of your life not even 348 00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:18,600 being taken away from you, it just has to look different. 349 00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:23,240 It just looks like now. OK, now that we know about our 350 00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:28,480 herpes status, let's look at the things that are coming up 351 00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:31,160 alongside this. Because for many of us, it's not 352 00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:33,640 just the physical symptoms. It's not just the physical pain. 353 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:36,160 Take the medication and you know, we move on. 354 00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:38,600 Because realistically, we only need to think about this on 2 355 00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:43,760 occasions. 1 if we have physical symptoms, 2 if we need to tell 356 00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:46,920 someone new. So why is this dictating our 357 00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:49,120 behaviors? Why is this making us decide 358 00:20:49,120 --> 00:20:51,440 that we don't want to be here anymore? 359 00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:55,080 Why is it making us, you know, take these steps, take these 360 00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:59,040 actions? And I'll be the first to tell 361 00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:05,200 you that herpes does serve as a catalyst for ending a world. 362 00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:12,280 So yes, your world is over. This is the end of your world as 363 00:21:12,280 --> 00:21:17,680 it is. And, you know, if you decide 364 00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:20,240 that you don't want to change anything, then more power to 365 00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:21,680 you. You got you got good things 366 00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:23,360 going for you. But that kind of person will 367 00:21:23,360 --> 00:21:27,600 never hear this podcast. If you genuinely, you know, 368 00:21:28,160 --> 00:21:33,640 don't desire to take anything from your herpes diagnosis, 369 00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:36,880 learn from it, integrate it into how you move moving forward, 370 00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:39,560 that person will never hear this. 371 00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:42,240 But if you are sitting here, you listening to it, you're looking 372 00:21:42,240 --> 00:21:47,400 for something. And I ain't going to say I'm 373 00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:52,160 going to be the one to help you find it, but I can perhaps point 374 00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:57,120 you in the direction that will support you in that I can't do 375 00:21:57,120 --> 00:22:01,320 it for you. And I, I've, I've really fucked 376 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:04,480 up in life a lot of times thinking that I can do things 377 00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:11,520 for people and you can, I can be the signpost like I will do 378 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:16,240 every fucking thing in my power to help you help you. 379 00:22:18,120 --> 00:22:22,320 If you're somebody who doesn't want to help themselves, there 380 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:31,080 is nothing I can do for you. If you come to me and you just 381 00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:32,360 say, hey, I don't want to be here. 382 00:22:32,360 --> 00:22:34,920 I just want to vent. I want to get this off my chest. 383 00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:37,560 There's nothing I can do for you. 384 00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:48,040 If you are looking for hope, if you are looking for actionable 385 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:54,880 steps, if you are looking to get into a relationship or date, if 386 00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:57,760 you are looking to learn from your experience, if you are 387 00:22:57,760 --> 00:23:02,720 looking for community and you want to work through what it 388 00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:06,600 means for you now to have herpes, I'm here. 389 00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:16,560 I'm here for that because my world ended couple times. 390 00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:21,080 Like I ain't gonna lie to you. My world ended several times 391 00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:25,000 throughout my life. My world ended, you know, I can 392 00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:29,240 think back to my first breakup in 7th grade. 393 00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:32,560 Like I, I, I'm not gonna say we're still in touch, but I've, 394 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:37,040 you know, connected with her recently and that was heart 395 00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:39,560 shattering. My world changed. 396 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:51,040 Going to high school, losing all my middle school friends that I 397 00:23:51,040 --> 00:24:00,040 had grown so attached to, world ending, getting to that point in 398 00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:03,000 college where I thought that I knew what the rest of my life 399 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:06,040 was going to look like. I finished high school, I 400 00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:09,440 applied for schools, and I thought I was going to get a 401 00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:12,760 scholarship to this place. It was Northern Iowa, University 402 00:24:12,760 --> 00:24:16,080 of Northern Iowa. I was too short. 403 00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:19,000 They stopped calling. World ended. 404 00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:27,800 And in each of these experiences, these were at the 405 00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:30,560 time the worst thing that could ever happen to me. 406 00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:40,400 Graduate college, get my first job. 407 00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:47,000 A year into my first job, finding out that I got herpes. 408 00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:51,720 Worst thing that ever happened to me again. 409 00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:59,440 World ending. Getting into a relationship with 410 00:24:59,440 --> 00:25:02,240 somebody I had no business being in a relationship with. 411 00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:07,480 That relationship ending. World ending. 412 00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:19,440 Getting my dream job at the time was my dream job, and then 413 00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:25,080 knowing that I needed to leave before I got fired, leaving to 414 00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:31,320 what became my ideal job, everything I wanted to do, I get 415 00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:37,680 fired. World ending, that's eight. 416 00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:43,440 That's like 8 endings right there that I just named moving 417 00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:51,120 back home to Saint Louis starting this podcast 2017. 418 00:26:03,430 --> 00:26:07,790 That's why I would say a new world for me was built. 419 00:26:10,590 --> 00:26:16,510 All of the things that I made previously that my world ended 420 00:26:16,510 --> 00:26:23,600 around those world ending life events that occurred, I'm still 421 00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:27,640 here. I've taken something from each 422 00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:34,360 of those endings like, and I've taken the raw material, the 423 00:26:34,360 --> 00:26:38,880 essence of the lessons that I've gotten from those failed 424 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:44,200 experiences. And I took them and and turned 425 00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:46,640 them into something and they made me who the fuck I am. 426 00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:52,640 Every one of the world ending events that has happened 427 00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:57,800 throughout your life has given you the raw material that makes 428 00:26:57,800 --> 00:27:00,600 up the essence of who you are, that makes up your nature. 429 00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:07,600 And for many of us, we don't take a moment to look at what 430 00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:09,600 our nature is so that we can nurture that. 431 00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:13,680 And the longer we go without nurturing our nature, we find 432 00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:16,520 like an artificial substitute for that nurturing. 433 00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:21,000 And maybe that does come out in sexual relationships. 434 00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:24,600 Maybe it's drinking on weekends and kicking it with the with 435 00:27:24,640 --> 00:27:28,800 with your friends and being away from yourself, creating noise, 436 00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:34,320 scrolling social media, starting businesses and and activities 437 00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:37,680 that just keep you busy and keep you running around and all over 438 00:27:37,680 --> 00:27:45,360 the place. All of these world ending events 439 00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:48,960 would not have made me into a person capable of doing this. 440 00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:53,240 And I'll speak to, you know, there's been a couple other ones 441 00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:56,120 that I've had, you know, it's been a little bit over a year 442 00:27:56,120 --> 00:27:58,760 since the last relationship that I had ended. 443 00:27:59,200 --> 00:28:05,240 And I feel like it, it's taken me until, yeah, just now, maybe 444 00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:10,200 a few weeks ago, to actually comprehend the ending of the 445 00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:15,040 relationship and the lessons from that. 446 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:22,520 And I've taken that raw material and compress that into who I am 447 00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:32,040 so that now there can be even further of an expansion of who I 448 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:38,640 am and recognizing the importance of nurturing my own 449 00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:41,640 nature and identifying what my nature is. 450 00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:48,040 So each of these world ending events kind of ornato hit my 451 00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:50,520 crib. You know how unlikely that is. 452 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:58,040 And while I wasn't there, yeah, I'm I'm, I've been susceptible 453 00:28:58,040 --> 00:29:03,520 to stagnancy and I've been in this few situations where that 454 00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:06,880 was happening. And it's taken some world ending 455 00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:10,240 event to keep me from being stagnant. 456 00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:12,920 If I was stagnant, we wouldn't. We wouldn't have something 457 00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:17,240 positive for positive people. All of those world ending events 458 00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:22,800 made me into who I am today. I might not look like what I've 459 00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:29,520 been through, but I hold space like what I've been through. 460 00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:35,240 All of these micro explosions of my world's ending have given me 461 00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:39,120 this fucking capacity to be able to hold space. 462 00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:42,120 So when people tell me this is the end of the world for me, 463 00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:44,800 like I fucking empathize. I get it. 464 00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:47,440 I know what it's like because it's happened to me dozens of 465 00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:51,520 times in my life to where I can hold that space. 466 00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:56,480 I can't hold that container for the grief, the anger, the rage, 467 00:29:56,480 --> 00:30:01,200 the frustration, the not wanting to be here, the depression, the 468 00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:04,760 helplessness, the hopelessness, the negativity. 469 00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:08,560 Something positive for positive people wouldn't be what it is 470 00:30:08,560 --> 00:30:10,360 without those world ending events. 471 00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:15,480 It wouldn't be what it is without the people whose worlds 472 00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:20,640 ended deciding to come here and giving hope to those who are 473 00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:24,680 looking to transition into a newer world for themselves. 474 00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:36,960 So herpes is the end of the world, and I ain't going to sit 475 00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:39,600 up here and tell you it ain't. That's the reality. 476 00:30:41,120 --> 00:30:44,880 What I will tell you is that that doesn't mean it's the end. 477 00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:57,960 All of those failures, failed opportunities, all of those 478 00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:03,040 failed jobs, those failed relationships, none of that was 479 00:31:03,040 --> 00:31:04,680 failure. That was fuel. 480 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:13,920 All of those failures were fuel that further validated who I am 481 00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:16,640 outside of what my body is or what my body can do. 482 00:31:22,510 --> 00:31:30,070 It's my expression. It's how I'm experienced and I 483 00:31:30,070 --> 00:31:35,270 just so happened to have this outlet for that and it just so 484 00:31:35,270 --> 00:31:37,230 happens to be something that can help people. 485 00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:39,720 It just so happens to be something that people are 486 00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:46,320 looking for. And this way, this wasn't a, it 487 00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:48,640 wasn't something that I planned. It wasn't something that I 488 00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:50,160 thought out and was like, oh, you know what? 489 00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:51,240 Here's how my life is going to look. 490 00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:53,240 I'm going to get herpes. I'm going to talk about it and 491 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:55,760 I'm going to be successful and live happily ever after. 492 00:31:56,000 --> 00:32:03,760 I was fucking forced pressured like I had my ass handed to me, 493 00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:06,640 like my ass has been kicked over the years. 494 00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:12,000 At the time, herpes wasn't the worst thing that ever happened 495 00:32:12,000 --> 00:32:14,360 to me. But since getting herpes, it's 496 00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:22,560 been a few things that had I not been prepared based on what I've 497 00:32:22,560 --> 00:32:25,920 been through prior to my diagnosis and after, I wouldn't 498 00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:30,040 be where I'm at going to be able to hold this space. 499 00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:31,840 I'd have fucked this up a long time ago. 500 00:32:31,840 --> 00:32:36,560 And Carl Givens, I shout out to Carl Givens only given 100 Dear 501 00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:42,720 friend of mine, man, he always says like you ain't, you can't. 502 00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:45,840 If I got this earlier, I'd have fucked it up a long time ago. 503 00:32:46,640 --> 00:32:51,320 So right now, where I'm at, where you're at, think about it 504 00:32:51,320 --> 00:32:55,400 like this. If it hadn't happened to you 505 00:32:55,400 --> 00:33:00,560 now, maybe you'd have fucked up in a whole different way. 506 00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:05,000 And I don't even like to say fucked up in the sense of like a 507 00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,680 herpes diagnosis. But what I mean for myself is 508 00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:10,560 had I not been through what I experienced, I wouldn't be able 509 00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:15,560 to hold this, this, this massive thing that people gravitate 510 00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:22,200 towards with reverence, with grace, with empathy, with ethics 511 00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:25,080 and values. I would have fucked this up a 512 00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:29,560 long time ago because it took for my failures and what I've 513 00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:33,000 been through in order to nurture the nature that I had. 514 00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:37,040 If I was immature, I don't. I'd probably mess this up. 515 00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:47,920 So my final bit that I want to leave y'all with here is yes 516 00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:51,520 herpes is the end of the world, but what kind of world do you 517 00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:54,920 want to create from the raw material that the old one left 518 00:33:54,920 --> 00:34:04,560 behind? I'm going to wrap this up here, 519 00:34:06,360 --> 00:34:09,440 it's March 11th. On March 21st in New York City, 520 00:34:09,719 --> 00:34:13,320 oh actually Brooklyn, NY, we have an in person herpes support 521 00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:16,080 day. It's the Herpes Stigma Expo. 522 00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:19,600 It will start at 11 AM with a support group in person for 523 00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:22,560 about two hours and then we'll shift into the No Shameless game 524 00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:25,600 documentary showing. We'll have AQ and a afterwards 525 00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:28,480 with some of the participants that were in the documentary. 526 00:34:28,719 --> 00:34:32,040 This is about herpes stigma. We'll have about a 2 hour lunch 527 00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:33,600 break if people want to stay on site. 528 00:34:33,600 --> 00:34:37,000 We'll have a couple of like foods there if people want to 529 00:34:37,040 --> 00:34:40,120 participate in the communication simulation that we're going to 530 00:34:40,120 --> 00:34:42,840 be putting together for people to just watch and see if it's 531 00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:44,840 something that maybe they want to participate in. 532 00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:47,920 Getting the practice of telling someone that you have herpes. 533 00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:53,239 After that, Lauren Keene, who is a, it's a one woman show called 534 00:34:53,239 --> 00:34:56,120 Deal Breaker. She's going to be presenting 535 00:34:56,120 --> 00:34:57,920 that for us. It's about an hour and then 536 00:34:57,920 --> 00:35:00,920 we'll do AQ and a afterwards and then to close out, I'll be 537 00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:05,680 facilitating about a 2 hour long workshop giving people the 538 00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:08,720 practice, dating and disclosure and you'll have like your own 539 00:35:08,720 --> 00:35:11,240 little outline of what it looks like for you. 540 00:35:11,240 --> 00:35:14,440 So we're going to go over our own styles of doing it, how we 541 00:35:14,440 --> 00:35:16,920 would do it. We're going to put together 542 00:35:16,920 --> 00:35:20,600 scripts and you'll be able to take that home with you and 543 00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:23,360 it'll just be kind of like a skeleton for you to feel 544 00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:26,520 confident and practicing bringing your own personality to 545 00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:28,360 it. So that's March 21st. 546 00:35:28,720 --> 00:35:36,600 If you go to spfpp.org/expo Expo then you will be able to see the 547 00:35:36,600 --> 00:35:38,600 details of the event, sign up for it. 548 00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:41,520 And I want to be able to get more people to these things. 549 00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:44,960 So when y'all hear this podcast, I sign up for the newsletter. 550 00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:50,240 I send maybe 1 1/2 emails per month from the newsletter, which 551 00:35:50,240 --> 00:35:53,000 is typically just all of the updates for something positive. 552 00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:55,800 But people want to do it in person stuff. 553 00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:58,440 They ask about it and then the people who ask about it don't 554 00:35:58,440 --> 00:36:01,080 subscribe to the marketing so I never hear from them again. 555 00:36:01,240 --> 00:36:03,760 Whenever I'm like, hey, I'm going to be in this place and 556 00:36:03,760 --> 00:36:07,080 there's like all these people who were there that maybe we can 557 00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:12,640 get together and socialize. But yeah, I guess y'all think I 558 00:36:12,840 --> 00:36:15,640 send a lot of emails. I don't know, but I usually just 559 00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:18,720 send one a month and if there's an event you might get 2. 560 00:36:20,320 --> 00:36:24,120 So yeah, that's it y'all, thank you for listening. 561 00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:26,800 I hope this didn't sound like a diary entry and that it was 562 00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:29,360 something useful. I threw some yoga therapy 563 00:36:29,360 --> 00:36:33,880 exercises in there for y'all to hopefully be able to find 564 00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:37,320 valuable and implement. And hopefully this encourages 565 00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,840 you to sign up for a support call, try and join a support 566 00:36:40,840 --> 00:36:44,560 group or maybe even work with me for yoga therapy or just attend 567 00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:46,760 an event, whatever it is that you need for yourself. 568 00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:50,400 All right, until next time, stay present. 569 00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:53,520 Notice I've been saying that a lot more lately instead of sex 570 00:36:53,520 --> 00:36:56,960 positive or saying positive because I don't want y'all to. 571 00:36:57,120 --> 00:37:00,000 You know, when you're positive, you also draw in and attract the 572 00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:04,680 negative by default. But when you are neutral or if 573 00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:09,440 you're present, then you can hold space for both or neither 574 00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:11,400 for whatever it is that you subscribe to. 575 00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:14,560 All right, till next time.