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Hey everybody, so I got this 
message from my friend in 

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response to an audio message I 
sent her explaining how hard it 

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is in the season. 
And to be honest with you, I 

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would have to admit that one of 
my biggest fears, as Job said, 

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the thing I feared most has come
upon me is when I don't feel 

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like there's a way out. 
When I don't know what to do. 

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When something has been so wrong
for so long and I have tried 

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everything I know, tapped into 
every resource I have and 

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nothing is changing. 
Something that is so painful and

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I just have to accept that maybe
I don't know. 

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Maybe I can't calculator, 
strategize, or obtain enough 

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information or tools or 
resources to extricate myself 

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from a painful life dynamic. 
And this experience being 

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ongoing has caused me to have to
trust the Lord in a new way. 

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Because the truth is that I, I 
can't solve all of my problems. 

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And sometimes Jesus doesn't give
us the fix it answer. 

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Sometimes he's like, I need you 
to trust me in this hard, hard, 

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hard place. 
And in response to that 

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conversation with my friend, I 
received this message. 

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And I thought, you know, I'm 
probably not the only person who

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has a persistent problem. 
And maybe you need to hear this.

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Maybe you're going through 
grief, maybe you're experiencing

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loss in some way or other. 
And I just think that this 

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message, it's gold and it's 
truly from the lips of Yeshua 

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himself. 
Sorry that you are going through

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the grief. 
I know you'll continue to walk 

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through it. 
And I know that the Lord is so 

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faithful to to hold your hand 
and witness it and catch every 

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tear and, and that none of it's 
for waste. 

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There's information in your 
tears. 

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I can feel his honor, the Lord's
honor for you as you're trusting

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him with your tears and that 
you're willing to go to that 

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place where you can grieve with 
him. 

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And that might just be the place
you're in for a minute there. 

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There's going to be cycles of 
grief. 

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He's teaching you to share all 
of that with him and that he's 

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not going to throw it in your 
face. 

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And quite honestly, I don't 
believe he's going to leave you 

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in that place. 
I think there's going to be 

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something that he he gives you, 
but there has to be room for it 

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to land. 
And if you have to walk through 

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your grief, that's what that is 
right now. 

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And that's OK. 
There might not be a solution, 

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which maybe is something you 
need to learn is that sometimes 

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things are just hard there. 
There isn't always a fix it. 

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There isn't always an equation. 
There isn't always something to 

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put a bow on it, make it pretty 
again. 

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Sometimes it just is. 
I have to let myself feel this 

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and and to be witnessed by 
Yeshua in the rawness of my 

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emotion. 
So it's almost like, again, 

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you're turning yourself to the 
Lord and you're literally 

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pulling back all of the veils 
and the costumes and the 

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protections and you're saying, 
look at my bleeding heart. 

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I'm not withholding it from you.
Because what does that do when 

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we expose our wound to Yeshua's 
light? 

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There's life that can pour back 
into that place. 

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And that's the only way that we 
can get life back into that 

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place is to literally show him 
everything. 

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And in even in, in that, it 
feels like that is an act of 

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honour to the Lord of saying, I 
trust you with this intimate 

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thing that I don't even know 
what to do with. 

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Come look at it, dissect it with
me. 

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Pour your light over this. 
Let me weep into your shoulder. 

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Let me tell you exactly how I'm 
feeling. 

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It's that's intimacy. 
There's intimacy there. 

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Maybe attempt to stop squirming.
Someone should just like honor 

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that there's grief there. 
There's not a good way through 

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grief other than just letting 
yourself feel it and and move 

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it. 
Give it to the Lord. 

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Have the Lord witness you in 
your grief. 

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It's OK to not know. 
Maybe that's your answer from 

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the Lord right now. 
It's like not yet love. 

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It's OK to be in the I don't 
know again, instead of flailing 

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around and trying to come up 
with a solution, I have to fix 

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this there. 
I'm, you know, I just found the 

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I just have to find the right 
equation. 

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I just have to read the right 
book. 

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I just have to find the thing. 
Da, da, da. 

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There's got to be an there's got
to be an answer. 

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There's got to be an answer. 
It's eluding you from actually 

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being in a place of stillness 
with the Lord. 

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Again, sometimes the I don't 
know is the answer until he 

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tells you there's a different 
answer. 

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And what a practice to stop 
flailing. 

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It reminds me of trying to hug a
kid that's throwing a temper 

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tantrum when they finally give 
in. 

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Let the Lord wrap himself around
you. 

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Even in the I don't know. 
That might be his actual answer 

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for you is not yet like stay in 
the I don't know because He 

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does. 
He knows. 

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Like set aside what your brain 
thinks it knows and trust that 

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He does and that is trustworthy.
You can stake your life on what 

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he knows. 
And he also, I think, honors 

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that you're going to him with 
all of this, that you are being 

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obedient. 
It's not about you performing 

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correctly in this. 
It is about you turning to Lord 

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as you're doing and, and you've 
listened to him. 

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He's asked you to let him be 
your everything and that's what 

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you're doing. 
Is it messy and sad and 

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frustrating and all the things? 
Absolutely. 

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But again, this is what intimacy
looks like. 

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It's not always pretty. 
It's not always peaceful. 

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It's OK to be in the I don't 
know and, and to let the Lord 

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show you as he's been doing and 
revealing to you where you need 

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to take accountability or where 
you need to get healing or you 

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know that you're taking 
accountability for your part and

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he's showing you those things as
he sees they're beneficial for 

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you. 
Trust his timing. 

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It's not about your timing, It's
about his always like lay down 

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your timeline at his feet. 
Say yes to his, even if that 

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means that your nervous system 
and your brain flail around 

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because you don't know what the 
answers are. 

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Who cares if you don't know what
the answers are? 

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The Lord does. 
Who cares if you don't know what

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the path ahead looks like? 
The Lord does. 

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And that is absolutely enough. 
And it always will be. 

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Trust in the Lord with all thine
heart, and lean not unto thine 

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own understanding. 
In all thy ways acknowledge him,

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and he shall drive thy paths.