1 00:00:35,960 --> 00:00:38,160 Welcome back to the Millennium Mustard Seed. 2 00:00:38,440 --> 00:00:43,000 I'm your host Rod and I have a micro message for you from Carly 3 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:48,320 Tebbs acceptance as an idol. This one hits close to the heart 4 00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:51,280 and I know it's going to be helpful to hear Carly's 5 00:00:51,280 --> 00:00:55,240 reflection. Recently, Prince and Carly have 6 00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:57,680 both been helping with the podcast. 7 00:00:57,680 --> 00:01:00,800 They've joined the MMS team, if I can say it that way. 8 00:01:01,440 --> 00:01:06,560 God has called them to lift our arms up in time of need and to 9 00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:10,160 help with some audio stuff. And this is not a one man show 10 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:13,440 any longer. It's an honor to have like Minds 11 00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:18,680 coming together and joining just to be an end time remnant voice. 12 00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:23,000 There's so much that they have to offer and it is honestly 13 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:27,840 genuinely an honor to have them stepping up and contributing to 14 00:01:27,840 --> 00:01:31,080 the MMSI. Hope you enjoyed this micro 15 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:33,600 message from Carly. We'll be doing this 16 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:37,640 intermittently and also Prince will be reading some scripture 17 00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:40,320 and giving reflections as time goes on as well. 18 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:46,520 Let's get into this acceptance as an IDOL audio message from 19 00:01:46,520 --> 00:02:10,360 Carly. So my circle of trusted friends 20 00:02:10,360 --> 00:02:15,520 and family, the people that are most dear to my heart, that I 21 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:19,080 walk with day after day after day, who I'm vulnerable with and 22 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:23,640 whom we share, you know, forthright, candid, intimate 23 00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:27,400 conversations. We all go to the same church, 24 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:31,160 and my brother-in-law is the pastor of that church and his 25 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:36,480 wife, my sister-in-law is a pastress if if that's even a 26 00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:38,080 word. But she's a minister in her own 27 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:41,240 right and and we're we're all there. 28 00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:45,320 We are all in the house together learning to do ministry 29 00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:48,160 together. Now we all used to go to the 30 00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:50,600 church. The church I talk about in part 31 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:53,760 four with Rod. We all went there together and 32 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:56,920 and when that whole thing imploded we all kind of went our 33 00:02:56,920 --> 00:02:59,280 separate ways. Of course in some ways we're 34 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:01,960 we're family a lot of us are are related by marriage. 35 00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:06,040 But we we weren't going to church together anymore and we 36 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:09,520 all it it did scatter the sheep. It really did. 37 00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:14,800 And so you know Fast forward and and 12 years later we're all in 38 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:17,600 this church together and we're all learning to be doing 39 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:21,800 ministry together and there's a growing curve there. 40 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:27,200 It's it is a opportunity to really have the Lord search our 41 00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:30,840 hearts inside ministry, doing ministry together. 42 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:33,600 And it's been a beautiful and challenging experience. 43 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:37,800 And recently it came to my attention that there were two 44 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:41,600 families that were negatively impacted by something I had 45 00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:46,440 said, and they left the church because of me. 46 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:52,640 And I felt so embarrassed by what I had said. 47 00:03:52,840 --> 00:03:56,640 And I started questioning God, did you not want me to share 48 00:03:56,640 --> 00:03:57,520 that? Did? 49 00:03:58,240 --> 00:04:00,680 Am I supposed to be something other than I am? 50 00:04:01,560 --> 00:04:04,880 And if you guys have listened to any of my interviews here, you 51 00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:08,600 know that what you see is what you get. 52 00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:13,240 I'm really just coming with the this is what behind the mask 53 00:04:13,280 --> 00:04:16,399 looks like. I'm I'm not about the Christian 54 00:04:16,399 --> 00:04:18,120 mask. I'm pretty forthright. 55 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:25,000 So in one instance I had asked this person in in the church we 56 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:30,200 are trying to to work out the next stage in a project and I'd 57 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:35,880 ask him where does your business acumen meet your spiritual gifts 58 00:04:35,880 --> 00:04:37,120 Like? What does that look like for 59 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:37,840 you? How? 60 00:04:38,160 --> 00:04:42,760 Where's the overlap? You know, what is the sweet spot 61 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:45,200 right in there, you know? And he answered the question 62 00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,800 really well. And and since I asked a 63 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:52,920 vulnerable question, I offered to be vulnerable because to me 64 00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:55,240 that seems fair. You know, if somebody does self 65 00:04:55,240 --> 00:05:00,120 disclosure, I then offer self disclosure because it keeps the 66 00:05:00,160 --> 00:05:04,280 the playing field level. And so I just, I know I didn't 67 00:05:04,280 --> 00:05:07,000 do a good job. In the moment I could feel 68 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:11,240 myself rambling a bit and not being completely concise. 69 00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:17,360 But I had I had shared with him that I'm I'm an intercessor, but 70 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:22,360 my my my calling is more over land and gates in the land. 71 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:25,000 It's more for the redemption of territories. 72 00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:28,360 And while I do intercede for people, it seems as though for 73 00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:32,200 me, the Lord often takes me up above areas over territories and 74 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:34,920 and to set things right. So I shared this with him and to 75 00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:40,200 me that seems not outrageous. You know, that's pretty 76 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:45,280 Biblically sound to me, to me. And then another family had been 77 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:47,600 offended by the language I use when I pray. 78 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:51,560 And I can't tell you exactly what that language is, but they 79 00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:55,120 ended up being very offended that the pastor would have gone 80 00:05:55,120 --> 00:06:01,320 to a Bride ministries advance, you know, conference and 81 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:05,360 confronted the pastor. And we was aggressive and weird, 82 00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:09,080 and they left the church as well. 83 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:14,360 And from the time I came into the body of Christ in the 84 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:17,040 church, in the four walls of the church, I was warned that I 85 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:20,040 would not be understood, that I should keep to myself, that I 86 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:25,080 should not tell my story because people wouldn't understand. 87 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:29,080 And let me tell you, when people did start to hear about my 88 00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:35,600 story, I was met with prayer meetings against me. 89 00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:41,800 Like the witch hunt for the witch I was desperately asking 90 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:47,440 the Lord to deliver me from. Being became a regular 91 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:49,800 occurrence in the church and I I really was. 92 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:54,200 I really felt relegated. I really felt rejected. 93 00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:59,000 But but as the Lord would have it I I wanted Jesus more than 94 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:03,520 anything else and and and it hurt but I was like if this is 95 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:06,600 what it is you know OK whatever we're rolling. 96 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:10,520 So anyway I found this out in our in our leadership meeting 97 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:16,160 and it hurt my heart Like it really hurt my heart that I 98 00:07:16,160 --> 00:07:22,560 would have just by virtue of being myself offended somebody 99 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,760 to the point that they would walk away from the church. 100 00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:28,920 And and my my wonderful husband pointed out to me that you know 101 00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:32,320 that really they might be blaming you but it has more to 102 00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:34,720 do with something that's unresolved inside of them. 103 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:38,000 And and while that that felt right and that sounded right. 104 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,520 I couldn't deny the fact that I was a deeply embarrassed. 105 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:49,320 I felt like I don't I don't need to be in the church like I'm 106 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:53,200 cool to be with Jesus in the closet with my close little 107 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:55,720 circle of friends and family for the rest of my life. 108 00:07:55,880 --> 00:08:00,760 I don't in fact need any of and I got really mad that night. 109 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:03,520 I came home and I was hot. Mad. 110 00:08:03,520 --> 00:08:07,840 I was heated and I was telling Prince and all the things and I 111 00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:10,960 was, you know, I was being rather vulgar. 112 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:14,320 OK, Mask off. I did drop some Effenheimer's 113 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:17,200 here and there and I I needed to get it out. 114 00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:20,720 It was like I just needed to have emotional diarrhea. 115 00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:23,160 If you ever get a stomach ache and you feel like I just need to 116 00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:25,040 puke to get this out. It was that. 117 00:08:25,960 --> 00:08:34,880 So I did that and and it was rough and the Lord pointed a few 118 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:38,039 things out to me that I think might benefit others to 119 00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:44,240 contemplate. One of those things is that when 120 00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:48,520 you're working in the Church, when when you are in a position 121 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:52,840 of leadership, you you have to learn to be able to discern the 122 00:08:52,840 --> 00:08:58,840 difference between the enemy attacking and God coming for 123 00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:03,040 your idols. And it can feel very similar in 124 00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:06,280 the moment. Because at first when this came 125 00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:11,480 about, I was like, Satan is roar walking around like a roaring 126 00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:15,160 lion looking for whom he can devour and he has spotted me. 127 00:09:18,560 --> 00:09:20,320 But that wasn't actually what was happening. 128 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,200 But it felt very much like that. Because I'm like, man, I'm just 129 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:28,360 being under attack and stuff. But later that night, the Lord 130 00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:35,560 pointed out to me, He asked me a question, Carly, why are you at 131 00:09:35,560 --> 00:09:37,640 this church? And I was like, well, 'cause you 132 00:09:38,280 --> 00:09:42,080 you told me to to come here. You you, you said to be here. 133 00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:47,240 And so I'm here. And and he said, well, and what 134 00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:50,800 are you supposed to do there? And I said, I don't really know. 135 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:55,280 Apparently I'm not supposed to pray or talk to anybody or share 136 00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:58,440 anything about myself. So I, you know, I was being 137 00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:01,200 snarky with Jesus, but he's got big, strong shoulders so he 138 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:04,120 could take it. And he said, you know what? 139 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:12,240 You have an idol. You actually idolize being 140 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:18,040 understood and accepted by people in the church. 141 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:22,880 You value that more than you value my word to you. 142 00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:31,080 You value that over obeying me. And he was right. 143 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,520 Because this isn't the first time in my life that when I have 144 00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:42,040 felt misunderstood or not accepted, I got really ugly. 145 00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:46,080 I I felt really emotionally destabilized. 146 00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:50,800 And that is the marker of of protecting a false identity. 147 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:53,000 That's a marker of protecting an idol. 148 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:55,960 And the idol is that of being accepted and understood by other 149 00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:59,040 people. And if I can't get that, then 150 00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:01,520 God, I might not obey you, you see. 151 00:11:03,680 --> 00:11:07,080 And I had to agree with him that he was right because he's he, he 152 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:10,160 was right. And the process that unfolded 153 00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:15,000 after that was it wasn't it wasn't a quick easy like, Yep, 154 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,840 God, you're right. Here's my idol. 155 00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:19,160 All right, I'm going to go make some soup now. 156 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:25,360 It was like my heart was so affected by the truth of this 157 00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:29,840 it. And he what he showed me in the 158 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:33,320 best way I can really describe it to you is like if you have a 159 00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:36,560 dead tree in your yard, that dead tree representing at the 160 00:11:36,560 --> 00:11:40,800 idol and you were to cut it down, you could just throw the 161 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:44,640 top, you know, the tree in the in the chopper and just chop it 162 00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:46,560 up, ship it away. But you still have the stomp 163 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:51,800 right and all the roots and God is coming for the roots. 164 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:54,880 Now when he shows you an idol in your heart, when he asks you to 165 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:57,680 repent about something, you are valuing over him. 166 00:11:58,360 --> 00:12:00,800 He wants the roots. Now you have a choice. 167 00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:04,000 You can ask him to just cut the tree down and keep it pushing. 168 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:09,160 But when you, when you are able to sit with him or contemplate 169 00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:12,520 just how deep the truth he's telling you is, he'll go for the 170 00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:17,440 roots. And it can be a mourn, really 171 00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:22,200 mournful process. But the thing about God is that 172 00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:28,240 his love is so. I mean, it guts me because while 173 00:12:28,240 --> 00:12:34,760 I have idolized basically myself, right, my desires over 174 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:39,560 him, when he comes to minister to me about that abhorrent 175 00:12:39,560 --> 00:12:42,280 thing, he's so loving and tender. 176 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:44,320 He never comes with condemnation. 177 00:12:44,760 --> 00:12:48,360 He's never standing there, arms folded, scowling at me, nose in 178 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:49,720 the air. He's always like, I love you so 179 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:51,680 much. Let me take this root. 180 00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:55,120 Let me get this other root. Let me set your soil back right. 181 00:12:55,480 --> 00:12:57,360 Let me plant some flowers. Oh, I love you. 182 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,320 I love you. I love you. 183 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:08,920 What kind of God is this? So for a couple days, I was, I 184 00:13:08,920 --> 00:13:16,120 was feeling that uprooting out of my heart. the IT, it affected 185 00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:19,520 my soul. Like all these thoughts around 186 00:13:20,280 --> 00:13:23,600 all the ways that this idol has negatively impacted my life. 187 00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:26,080 They were coming up. There's one piece of the root, 188 00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:29,280 another area. This had impacted my 189 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:32,320 relationships. That's another root. 190 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:35,720 And he's pulling it out and he's so tender and he's so loving. 191 00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:39,120 But I can't pretend like it isn't a grievous process, 192 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:43,640 because it is. But this is the depth to which 193 00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:51,200 his faithfulness goes. He doesn't leave anything. 194 00:13:51,680 --> 00:13:56,520 He's so thorough. He's so thorough, and it's his. 195 00:13:56,680 --> 00:13:59,880 It's his responsibility to clean up our heart, and it is our 196 00:13:59,920 --> 00:14:05,840 responsibility to give him our willingness, our yes, our 197 00:14:05,880 --> 00:14:12,080 agreement to open the door. And so as I went through that 198 00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:18,960 process, I realized, thanks to the Holy Spirit, that we often 199 00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:23,040 separate the ideas of of doing and being. 200 00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:25,360 Like I said to him, I don't know what I'm doing here. 201 00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:29,120 Like, what do you want me to do? And he said to me, Carly, you 202 00:14:29,120 --> 00:14:32,200 have to stop thinking of doing and being as two separate 203 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:37,560 things, because you are there. By virtue of who I am in you, 204 00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:41,200 you are doing enough. You are obeying me. 205 00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:48,880 My presence is finding an outlet through your being there. 206 00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:53,480 Because we carry him, we affect the atmosphere. 207 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:58,240 It's been said so many times that we we should avoid having a 208 00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:00,920 religious mindset. It's not a Martha mindset. 209 00:15:00,920 --> 00:15:04,720 It's a merry mindset. When you go somewhere, you have 210 00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:09,200 an effect on that territory, on people, on the atmosphere, both 211 00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:14,080 physical and spiritual, that you just don't understand. 212 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:19,560 I don't understand, but he pointed out to me that because 213 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:24,480 he is in US, greater is he that is in US than he that is in the 214 00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:27,440 world. And we're either going to trust 215 00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:33,920 him to be who and what is needed in the moments of life, or, you 216 00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:40,800 know, we're going to have to repent and and let him speak to 217 00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:45,320 our hearts. Ellie, I've been feeling like 218 00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:46,880 I'm Luke 1. Gotta make a move. 219 00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,160 Go in a world. Out of the world that I'm still 220 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:51,120 trying to do. Don't care if they judge me. 221 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:52,720 Father God. Just being vulnerable. 222 00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:54,760 I can gain a word to lose my souls. 223 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:57,160 If I would, I lose. You said the path was narrow. 224 00:15:57,320 --> 00:15:59,880 You say this was no tightrope. I need time to repeat. 225 00:15:59,920 --> 00:16:01,840 So if I die, please let me die slow. 226 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:03,360 Just thankful it ain't done no more. 227 00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:06,160 You came and cut the light on. You just want us to step in 228 00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:07,880 there so we can get our shine on. 229 00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:09,840 I've seen them demons casting out their body. 230 00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:12,080 Have my mind, bro. They're trying to kill my flesh. 231 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:15,360 I want to show you what side on because you can't be in love in 232 00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:19,960 the world if you want to love Christ said you. 233 00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:22,520 Got to keep it on you got that shot shot. 234 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:27,440 Would you rather? Be loved by. 235 00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:32,800 Man or loved by Christ said. You got to keep it on. 236 00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:37,920 You got the shot. The shot, the Hey, would you 237 00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:41,440 rather be in love with the world or in love with Christ? 238 00:16:44,520 --> 00:16:46,680 This is Boy Head Brad and thank you for tuning into The 239 00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:49,200 Millennial Muscle Seat, my favorite podcast.