Hello folks. This is Princess.
You are listening to the Millennial Mustard Seed Podcast.
Thanks for listening. Don't forget to share with your
friends. That's tough.
We're in a very tough spot. I think that what we're doing
right now is a great benefit in virtue because it's an end
around between this whole corrupt informational system,
media system. We claim to believe in a God who
spoke the universe into existence.
And literally raised himself from the dead.
And yet we're not going to believe that anything else
exists in the spirit realm, even though his word tells us that
they do. Their bodies weren't permitted
to go to sleep like humans do, and they weren't permitted to go
to heaven. So they wander the earth.
You know, I've seen the eyes turn black to the numb tongues
being spoken. These giants were way up in the
island. The young Braves, the young men
would hide them in the trees. They wait for one of these 12
footers to come walking down the bath, and they would jump on
them and kill them and drag them back to the village.
And the village would feast on the body.
Then people start to get weapons.
They start to get armor. They start to build cities.
They start to fortify their cities.
Now God lets. Down and there's violence
everywhere. The battle, this war that we are
at is not against each other. It's against these
principalities and these rulers and these archons In the high
places, it's. Really worthwhile to read the
Bible yourself. Fear is one of the primary
drivers of mind control because we have to take every thought
captive and resist fear. You're going to have a
testimony. That is a justice case against
the Kingdom of darkness. Welcome back to the Millennial
Mustard Seed Podcast. I'm your host, Rod and thank you
for being here with me. I have a great episode in store
for you guys. I am joined by Carly.
She is a disciple of Dan de Balls.
She reached out to me. She wanted to share her
testimony. This is powerful.
It's an emotional roller coaster.
We barely get into Carly's full story, but we just this is an
introduction and we jump around some amazing topics about how
God has been healing her, some of the traumas that she has been
through. Her life.
And then there's some surprise cliffhangers for towards the end
of this episode about her Bigfoot encounter that she had.
Yeah, you heard me right, Sasquatch.
And it's just an edifying and encouraging story.
Overall, it's it needs to be talked about.
And I know other people out there.
You guys have a story. You got something you need to
get off your chest. This is the place to do it.
Reach out to me. Read the show notes you guys.
You're able to get my e-mail address there and find all kinds
of recommendations that I have there, like Dan de Balls, Bride
ministry. Website which you can go to to
get prayer or counseling if you need counseling in this space
for any of the traumas that you've been through in this life
or just to help you along your journey.
You can also find my website for the podcast in the show notes.
You guys leave me that five star rating and review.
That's how you help the show grow.
You help me reach more people just like me and you.
And you guys, please consider donating.
Shout out to Isaiah who came back and donated again.
My brother. We cover your prayers.
We thank you guys for the encouragement and for helping
this podcast to grow. We could not do it without you.
But with all that being said, I am ready to jump into this
episode. You guys ready?
Let's go. Let's go.
My name is Carly. I'm from Minnesota.
We're going to be talking about my life story and the
faithfulness of God today. Welcome to the Millennial Must
Receive podcast. Carly, that was an awesome
introduction and I'm happy to be with you.
This is going to be a really awesome conversation, so I just
want to start off with asking you how did you find the
podcast? My pastor is Dan Duvall, who you
have interviewed, so that's why I found it.
That's so awesome. Yeah, Dan is a really awesome
guy. I.
I think very highly of him and the work that he's done,
especially with the prayers. I always tell people my personal
life, his prayers are powerful. I believe in strategic prayer,
and God also talks about precatory prayer in the word.
I mean, that's, you know, the prayer that David was using
against hordes of enemies that were after him.
And I think it's something that's that the church doesn't
really put a lot of focus on. So that's so cool that Dan
Duvall is your pastor. He's he's an awesome guy.
Yeah, he's been on the show twice.
We've talked a couple times off air and there's nobody quite
like him. Indeed, it's really true.
I've also to piggyback on what you said about the strategic
prayers. I've definitely believe that in
this season, in this generation, it's becoming more and more
about praying with wisdom. I think generations before got
by for a long time with Lord. Please help such and such.
Lord, fix our government. You know, very vanilla prayers.
But the way that the enemy is operating, when you compare that
to the revelation of our identity in Christ and how
intentionally and intensely the Lord is unpacking who and what
we really are, it's like you can see that these things are rising
in intensity together. So the more the enemy is
utilizing wicked constructs in the Asheville realm or utilizing
inequities and bloodlines to get whatever he wants get to get
going On the contrary, the revelation of who and what we
really are is becoming more solid and people, I tell you,
there's, I don't know anybody in my circle who isn't asking that
question. Who am I?
What is my identity in Christ? What did he mean when he said
greater things? Will you do?
What did he say in John 17 when he asked us to be one with him
as he is one with the Father? And I think that these the
importance of our identity is playing a lot into how effective
our strategic warfare is, because it's no longer that
vague vanilla prayer. We're going for the constructs
of the enemy now with the weapons of of not seeking
victory as if it's something that's beyond us, but fighting
from the place of victory. Because the essence that has
made me is victory. I don't strive to be something.
The essence of Yahweh is in my DNA, you understand.
So it's like no longer fighting for victory, but from victory.
Because I am victory. You are victory.
It's not something you seek to aspire to achieve someday down
the road. It's an expression of your
identity. And so when we talk about dance
prayers, what he's expressing is the truth of who he is and the.
Reason why I think it rings so strong with you and with other
people is because it's like we've been like the Bible talks
about the deer panting for the water of life and now in that
water of life is our identity because he is in us.
What else is there like? The revelation of Christ is the
revelation of us as He made us to be.
It is him who works in us and through us to cause his will to
come about. And you're hitting on so many
important points and this podcast, this is the space for
that. This is the Millennium Mustard
Seed. Literally.
It's just funny that. There's so many churches out
there on every corner in every neighborhood in America.
And a lot of people have these questions.
They've been systematically desensitized.
They've been dealing with SRA. They've been dealing with all
types of different damaging effects from the enemy.
Some willing participants, some unwilling participants are maybe
they some people are being used by the enemy.
They don't even know it. And we have a generation of
people. That are looking for better
answers. Where can I go?
What does God really say about me, man?
I feel it right now. Wow.
I'm excited for this interview. This is the first time we
talked, Carly and I can tell you're a disciple of Dan Duvall.
Yeah, here's that. I can tell.
Yeah, it's so cool. Well, listen, let's start
jumping into your story a little bit.
You know, just give us, like. A 30,000 foot overview, if you
will, about who you are. You know how you grew up, and
let's just start diving in your story.
I'm just going to ask you questions as we go along.
There's a bunch of topics I really like to cover with you,
so let's go. Yeah.
The 30,000 foot view of my story is a story of coming into
wholeness, and there's something about trauma at a young age that
causes you to become many different people.
It's like, I will be different depending on the situation so
that I feel safe. And sometimes the identities
that I have found in my trauma have been not quite me.
And so it's been a it's been a healing journey, it's been a
broken journey. And I can't say like my parents
were maliciously trying to hurt me.
I wouldn't go that far. And I know for a lot of people,
that's their story. But that wasn't the case for me.
I I found myself victim as a young child to sexual
perversion, and I can go more into that.
And then again as a teenager. And I lost my dad at the age of
10. My parents were divorced.
My mom was remarried to a man that was just not cool, not
safe. And when my dad died, I knew he
wasn't gone, and I sought him, but I saw him in the wrong ways.
And as I grew up, my mom then had separated from my stepdad,
and I was doing a lot of drugs, like it was my escape.
It made me feel like I might have joy or companionship, just
freedom from the darkness that was in my heart.
And I moved to Chicago and got brutally sexually assaulted,
Came back to Minnesota. I wanted to get my life right,
but I just couldn't do it. And I ended up getting married.
I met and married a man in three months.
I met him at the bar, married him, married him three months
later. He gave me two beautiful sons.
The marriage wasn't safe and it dissolved.
And I went back into the witchcraft stuff, and I came to
a point in my life that it was I needed something else, and there
was someone else. I want to ask you, were your
parents involved in witchcraft, or was it a satanic occult or
anything that you're aware of? I mean, how did you really kind
of find yourself in these situations at a young age?
Not overtly, but as I've grown up, I've learned that there's
not a lot of room between Catholicism and witchcraft.
There's no conflict in the spirit there.
And that's not to say that our Catholic brothers and sisters
who go to Mass and do these things are practicing
witchcraft. But it's to say that you can go
to Catholic Church on one day and go practice witchcraft on
another day and not feel that condemnation, that that what's
the word, conviction. Thank you, Holy Spirit, that
that a person who was really walking with the Lord would feel
there's not a lot of conflict there.
So no, they weren't, you know? And I don't know because the
weirdness started when I was really young.
My first memory of life, I was 18 months old, and I've
confirmed this with my mom. I was like, mom, do you remember
that time I was sitting on your bed and you gave me like a pile
of raisins to eat? But you also had emptied your
purse. So there was like change and
stuff on the bed. And I was, I was eating the
raisins and then I stuck a Raisin up my nose and I got
really scared because I couldn't get it out.
And then you came in the room and started panicky.
She was like, Carly, you were like 18 months old when that
happened. You remember that?
I was like, yeah, I can remember dreams from being a year old,
just strange. And you know, I, as I got older,
my mom and my dad, they didn't, they really struggled.
They were young parents. They married right out of high
school. They had my brother and they
were really struggling financially when I was growing
up. They had an airplane because my
dad was a pilot and two bikes, no car.
So they were biking places and then flying places and then
Superior, WI. That's a different kind of cold
people. If you're from anywhere other
than northern Minnesota, Wisconsin, you just don't know
cold, like we know cold. It's a different, it's
offensive, it is a disrespectful kind of cold.
So they would live, they would live their lives like this,
right? And and my dad chose to be be
really mean to my mom. I don't.
I don't have memories of some of the things that she has said to
me. And not to downplay my dad but
just as I've asked questions as I've gotten older.
But I can remember them arguing. And I remember one particular
argument. I was maybe two and they were
going back and forth and I remember standing in the kitchen
crying for peanut butter. But I can remember thinking in
my little tiny brain, if I can just get them to focus on me,
they'll stop hurting each other. And this is this is how trauma
starts. When a child has to be the one
to save their parents from destruction, whether that's
perceived or actual, it does something to a child that it it
breaks their heart. And and as I got older, you
know, my parents divorced and my mom remarried.
But in that time, like I remember I was about four years
old and I remembered being able to put my fingertips together
and pull them apart and see lightning in between my fingers.
But I could never do it when other people are around.
Or like I remember being able to.
I used to call it in my mind, making space under my feet, but
I was levitating. But I could never do it when
other people were around. So it begs the question, how?
What's where? Where did I learn that?
I I don't have a real answer for that.
I mean, through prayer and the revelations that the Holy
Spirit's given me, I've I've just come to accept that these
are bloodline things, like druidism in my bloodline and for
some reason it just manifested in me.
Maybe because I was more curious.
I I really don't know. But it made me aware.
And the other thing I could see energies like around flowers and
around people colors. It looked like almost like a
colorful smoke coming off of people.
Yeah, like being able to see the OR aura.
Yeah, yeah, Yeah. So my mom married my stepdad.
It was terrible, folks. Lord Jesus, it was really.
He was very mean to my mom. I remember one night in
particular, I thought he was going to kill her.
He came in looking for. He came in.
My mom said I'm going to hide. I was probably 15 or so don't
tell him where I am. And and I knew where the shotgun
was. And he when he came in he looked
evil like his eyes were bloodshot and red and he was
storming around the house and some of this isn't that unusual.
But this night it was a particularly dangerous thing was
going on and my mom was hiding and I was hearing him run
imaging through the closet but I had moved it.
I had an instinct about it and I had moved it and he stormed
around and swore and was swearing and he ended up leaving
the house. But it wasn't that much longer
after that. My mom was like, I'm my mom, A
good Catholic girl said I'm leaving my husband, and that was
her end of her second marriage. But it was a very volatile
situation, and of course it wasn't all bad.
The Lord is. This is the thing about telling
hard stories that I never want to gloss over.
God had ways of showing me his love, even though things were
not safe at home. He gave me a friend named Keisha
when I was 8 years old. She lived across the street and
her family was very functional and healthy.
I loved being over there. Mom loved her dad or dad loved
her mom. There were no step people and
and I got to see what that looks like and I got to have a a
sister who loved me into this day.
She's still my best friend and 43 now almost.
But there were. It was like God gave me the
ability to find fun. It was almost like that was his
his relief Ave. for me. I could find fun anywhere.
And I did do some not so great things as a child.
We were pretty naughty, right? And I'm not going to give glory
to God for that. But I will say that there's
always relief. The Lord said to me one time,
Carly, there's always more. It's like sometimes we get to
places in our lives where we just feel as though what we're
experiencing now is, is what we'll always experience.
It can be very hopeless, right? But even in the worst times of
life, he's like, But there's always more, there's more joy.
It might not be here now, but that's not to say it's not
coming in the morning. You don't have money, but
there's more money. You don't have a friendship, but
there are friends. And he's providing always for
us. And what we're experiencing now
is not going to be our eternal experience.
It's not we're not damned to what we're having going on in
our life right now. There's always more.
The Lord is abundant. So Carly, let me ask you, let me
ask you this. I want to backtrack just a
little bit. Now when you said you could see
the electricity between your fingers and you could levitate
off the ground, do you remember ever having like any sleep
paralysis during this period in time?
Was there anything activating that or do you think that was
literally like you were saying a bloodline thing?
Or do you think that this was some type of disturbance from
the dark side? How do you help me understand
maybe why that was happening? To tell you the truth, I I don't
I don't know exactly why that was happening.
I do know that I've just always been very sensitive and I think
it's a gift. But you know the Lord, the the
Lord gives us gifts and it's a beautiful gift and I I
appreciate it and but the but the enemy can has an inkling
about these things too. And every time God does the
thing there, the enemy is right on his heels trying to
counterfeit that thing and try to pervert that thing and twist
that thing and make it a problem.
And I mean literally everything he counterfeits.
Well, and that's what I was thinking like that's why I kind
of asked like, is there, was there sleep paralysis at the
time or? But I would have weird dreams.
I can remember having weird dreams.
Like I can remember having dreams of being hung by my neck
and swung down a staircase. Or like, I remember as a
teenager, I had this dream. This was a terrifying dream.
I was changed to a bed, and there was a demon that was like,
intimidating and antagonizing and threatening me.
And then Satan shows up, but he doesn't look pretty.
He's in his form. That's not attractive.
And he was. He was threatening to, he was
threatening to rape me. And he said in my dream, how
does it feel to be raped by a demon?
And I could remember waking up from that dream and having
physical like I felt it on my body.
Like if you've, if of course you're married and you have
children, so you know you can feel the effects of physical
intimacy even after it's passed. And it was like that.
Wow. Yeah, Wow.
Yeah. So I don't know that.
It's like they were accessing me from the astral round.
Why I was targeted, I don't know.
Maybe it was. I think you're spot on with that
because, all right, so I said it this way to people.
I think the enemy sees our light that's in us sometimes long
before we see the darkness, right?
So I think the enemy can see that God has put his mark on us.
He has a calling on our life that literally there's an
anointing for what is written in the book of life for you to
complete. Like you said that in the
beginning here, that state of victory, that is where we are.
The enemy is defeated. We do have the high priest who's
interceding for us but the enemy sometimes, especially through
people, especially through circumstances when we have our
innocence when we're growing young and and some people turn
to be calloused over. But some people, they just, they
never quite let themselves get so cold that that they can't be
jump started by what God has planned for.
Actually, I've heard a little bit of both, but that's why I
was asking like was there something that you can remember
during that time that was significant where the enemy was
trying to pervert possibly a gift that you were given or
maybe it was a bloodline thing, but I mean we can kind of move
on from that. So I want to ask you, have you
had prophetic dreams at all? Yeah, I have.
I have my whole life. So one significant one was about
9/11. It was 1996, maybe 95, right in
there. And I had a dream that I was in
New York City in the dream, and all of a sudden there was this
loud bang and this, this like, grayish brown, thick.
Ash or smoke? I couldn't tell in the dream,
but it was like coming at us through the city streets.
I had been to New York before at that point, so I was.
I had physically been to New York.
You know, what? Was that what I'm saying?
But I I could see it in the dream coming.
And then everything just went. You couldn't see your hand in
front of your face. It was so thick and terrible.
And I woke up from that dream shook.
I've had dreams about. And then prayed.
Now, after I got saved, I would have dreams.
Like there was this one time I had this dream that someone was
trying to plant a bomb in Millennial Park in Chicago.
And I woke up from that dream and I pray, pray, prayed, and
like a week or two later they had caught some guy who was
planning to do a bomb attack. I have had other dreams where
things get exposed to me. One, recently things get exposed
to me about people around me that I that I love and I care
about. In inbound attacks and I'll tell
them and then we thwart them or hey, the Lord is giving you a
word for this thing. I've had dreams about famous
people. Madonna, Eminem, Fauci, Joe
Manchin, Trump Scavino, whatever his first name is.
Weird stuff. And so the prophetic dreams have
always been a thing and. I would have prophetic insights
as well. One time we were driving up to
Duluth. My dad lived up in Superior till
he died in 91. And my my inlaws, Not my inlaws.
My mom's husband's family also lived up there, so we were up
and down 35 W at least 3-4 times a month.
Like all the time going up there.
And one time I was like, mommy, watch out for deer.
We're driving up at night and within 30 minutes or so spap, we
hit a deer. And my mom was like, how would
you know? I'm like, I don't know.
I just know some stuff. Sometimes I would just know.
I don't know. It's man, the old, I don't know
about you, Carly, but the older I get, the more I remember stuff
from when I was younger, right? And I'll venture out and ask
questions and in a lot of ways, I've said it on the show many
times but I'm still peace and a lot of my my journey together,
right. That's the purpose of the the
podcast here is I get to talk with other people.
I get to sharpen. I get to be sharpened and really
bear each other's burdens in a way and fulfill the law of just
like, hey, like I'm here like I'm listening like I'll pray for
you like we're we're not alone. That's that's super important
for me. But just certain things that
you're saying, you know, I've had the conversation with my
mother where she was like when you were younger, you would say
things. I mean, I had trouble talking
for years and you know, kindergarten didn't didn't go so
well for me because I wouldn't talk.
I wouldn't talk to anybody. But she would say that I had
insight. I would tell her about things
that would then it would happen like a week later or hours
later. And it's just, it's interesting
to hear you say that there there's something about that
these, this generation, this generation of people, I think
God really has something up his sleeve for the enemy.
And I think the enemy thought it was going to be a weapon for him
to use for defeat. But but God's going to turn the
table. I'm sorry, I don't mean to
digress here, but no, let me ask you some more questions.
You just like triggered some stuff or I'm?
Like nostalgia. I just went back in my own story
by hearing a piece of yours. I'm like, this is good.
So talk to me a little bit about like seeing energy.
So you talked about being able to see like the aura of things
right now. Was that limited to just people?
Did you see that in animals? Is that in objects?
Just dive into that. Help me help me out here.
All of that. It was actually most poignant in
things in nature. Trees, flowers, rocks, places,
you know, I grew up a lot of the time in Superior, WI, which is
very beautiful. With Duluth is very beautiful
place, There's lots of rivers and wonderful nature places to
check out and my dad was big on outdoor sports, so he was a
pilot. So we had his own aircraft and
we skied and we went to the beach and he worked for KQDS
which is up there at the radio station.
We were always out and about. He's a very popular guy.
But my point in saying that is we spent a lot of time in nature
and I would see it there, but as I grew older, well into my 20s
really until I got saved. And then I had to shut down my
third eye because that's what was being utilized.
I could see energy in people. So I remember one time I was
walking down the path behind our apartment at the time, and
there's this woman, she was walking towards me and I just, I
had to tell her because I could see her aura.
But then there was this like dark mass that emanated from
somewhere around her abdomen. And I I knew that something was
wrong with her, like she was sick or.
She either knew it or she didn't know it, but it was looking
dark, right? And so I told her and I didn't
pray for her. I wasn't saved at the time.
I just dropped this thing on her, just crazy 20 year old
coming out of the woods talking about black auras.
Like I'm sure she was a little whoops, you know, but your aura
is super purple, you know? It was just, it was.
I'm sure it was weird for her, but I told her what I was seeing
and she. And she put her hand on her
stomach. She's like, yeah, I was just
diagnosed with, I don't even remember to be honest with you,
but she had admitted that there was something wrong in her
abdomen. So I was just always very
sensitive and and really that lended itself well to being
curious about the supernatural, right.
And when you combine a natural inclination to be curious about
what's beyond the veil. With with experiences of trauma,
it ends up being that there's an Ave. in for the enemy to kind of
twist these things and make it something else.
And so like it's it's just it's so slick, you know, it's like
when you're dealing with the enemy is so slick and then when
you take a step back like you had just said about.
He he, he thinks he's going to use this generation for some
things, but he's got another thing coming.
Yes, that's always true too, right?
So when I was 6, around the age of 6, I was molested by my
friend's grandfather who lived down the street from my dad's
house. He was he, he would like, sit me
on his lap and bounce me on his lap.
And I always made me feel very uncomfortable because he would
he his body would react. Let's just put it like that.
And then one day he asked me to, to come upstairs to show me
whatever I was six. I just agreed.
He was like, let me show you something cool.
I was like, alright, great. I'm not thinking about it,
right? All I knew was that he made me
uncomfortable, but I didn't put all the pieces together.
And then he he came out of the bathroom.
He was naked. This man tried to get me to
touch him. I ran away, but it was it was
jarring to my person. It was so jarring and it just it
triggered this hypersexuality in me and it from a young age.
And I I want to be candid with that because there's so much
shame that comes with that experience of sexuality at a
young age. You, you, you know it's not
right. It's almost like your body
betrays you because your mind, your heart, your soul, your
spirit, even it knows. This is not good.
But your body's like this is so good.
And it starts to sow this division of self very at a very
early age. And so on the heels of that
comes a lot of condemnation. Gosh, I should have known
better. I knew better.
I just didn't. I wish I would have La La La La
la and you start to blame yourself.
But the truth is, is that your body is built to respond to
these things. When it gets triggered early,
it's a problem. But it doesn't make you dirty.
It doesn't make you beyond redemption.
It doesn't make sexuality beyond redemption, but it but it does
require a real close walk with the Lord when it comes to
intimacy. They're on forward because
there's so much that has to be restored.
Wow. And it just makes me think, you
know, as I'm taking this journey with you, I'm sitting back
listening to your story. I can't help but now think about
the over sexualization of every generation, but especially the
youth who don't really have the parameters set in place because
not many parents are raising children in the way of the Lord
that when they grow, they won't depart from it.
That that's just not happening. But for example, even you put on
YouTube, you know, I put on like super book, which is like a
Christian cartoon for my 6 year old and a couple times and this
is through YouTube. I don't do cable.
I don't, I don't watch TV like that.
I have the TV for pretty much walking watching documentaries
on YouTube of different people but commercials that pop up.
I mean over sexualization of commercials.
I I literally walked in it was probably a couple weeks back and
there was like a demonic advertisement for some creepy
movie coming out. And my son physically he's
scared. I like had to run grab the
remote dive and and be like Oh my gosh Skip.
Like I turned it off. After that I'm like Nope, we're
going back to the books because I try to balance, you know he's
got he's got a a good collection of books that you know we try to
get him interested in. But it but it's it's everywhere.
It's everywhere. And so just the way you
described what happened to you at six years old about how, like
your body almost felt like it was betraying itself, Because I
believe, you know, kids especially pure of heart, yet I
mean just the corruption's not there.
What does the word say? The word has the final
authority. It says if you were to make one
of these little ones go astray, it is better you tie a meal
stone around your neck, which is a really big stone.
It's not something small and be cast to the bottom of the ocean.
And it's like that is happening on numbers that we can't even
imagine today all around the world.
But that that's what. Sorry, I didn't mean to go on
another rent, but you got me so emotionally involved just from
listening to you. Oh my goodness.
And it goes so much farther than that nowadays.
Because, you know, it used to be that in order to traumatize a
child you would have to physically interact with them.
But now, the way they do it in the spirit, they can access our
children astrally and affect their souls.
In ways that have a very similar bent as physical sexual assault
and it and it can come through the IT can come through the
wavelengths that come out of the TV, the tablet they access
children in their dreams like it's So it's so important that
we recognize that the way that the enemy operated 100 years
ago, even 50 years ago, they advance in technology too.
OK, so. Yeshua overcame all of it at the
cross. Everything that enemy was going
to advance and learn how to do, you know, crazy new stuff, La La
la. He already defeated it.
It's not a thing. It's not a thing of fear, but it
is a it is a thing of understanding, because the
weapons of our warfare advance too.
And they're but they're always the blood, the word, the
testimony, the Holy Spirit. And one thing I remember is you
have to keep your mind sober. We can't allow our children to
become afraid. The first thing in my life that
caught me was that fear. It was that fear, that moment I
thought I had to protect my parents from each other.
I had repressed memories come back to me from even before then
of things that would happen in the daycares that we're also
very traumatizing it and it it all led to just a very.
Broken understanding of people and self.
But the thing about it is that the Lord is present in all of
it. And I have heard people say,
well, God, if you were real, where were you?
And I'll tell you where he was. He was right there holding you
and crying. I had a vision one time of
something that happened to me. It's a new memory and I just, I
hesitate to tell this story but I think the important part is
this. I had a memory of of a trauma
that occurred in in the daycare when I was like 2 and the Lord
opened my eyes and it he was had me on his lap with his arms
wrapped around me and his chin rested on my shoulder and I
could feel his tears running down the front of my shirt.
And he was weeping. And he was saying, not this one
too. And this is the risk of free
will. This is the greatest risk the
Lord ever took, was giving people free will.
But he never wanted robots. But in giving people free will,
people can choose to abuse other people.
That doesn't make God not real. The purpose that you must find
in those traumas is where was he?
Because I promise you he was there.
I promise you he was weeping. I promise you he he guarded your
heart. That doesn't mean it didn't have
an effect, but it means that he is never absent.
And he weeps over our pain. Wow.
Yeah, that's that's amazingly deep.
I've heard it, said Carly, that some people have considered the
the loss of memory of certain things that have taken place,
especially in the younger portion of life.
It almost is a gift at times from God because like he, I
think also, well, he of all would know that there's these
breaking points and that there's trauma that that layers and it
compounds and you know, it builds up.
And I think in some ways, like I I feel that way.
The reason I say it is because I even feel that way about my
past. I think there's certain things
where God was like, we're not going to go there and deal with
that yet until you're looking at me and when you're focused on me
and you know who I am and you know the victory, but you know
that we and we all suffer. Read the psalms.
Read the psalms alone. For anybody out there who's
like, what are the, what is Rodney and Carly talking about?
Listen. There's the good, the bad, the
ugly, the beautiful and everything in between.
When you read the songs and see what David went through,
literally one point in time he is he's crying out and saying,
God, my enemies encompass me, Lord, they're they're here to
literally take me down into the pit, hear my cries, don't turn
your face from me and you go a couple verses later and he is
literally bold statements. My God is just and his fury has
consumed the enemy who has set their foot against me.
They have fallen by the way of the sword they drew to my neck,
right. I mean, we see, I'm, I'm
paraphrasing here, but but we see that with God's people.
So anybody out there listening right now, if if you're getting
triggered, if you're having memories, if you're dealing with
something, it's okay to go there.
But I want to tell you, go there with a godly person, pray and
and and and find somebody. Go reach out to Dan Duvall.
Every episode since I had him on, I put his website there.
So you guys have access to the prayers and you guys have access
to to go find a coach and get some help because that's
important to me. That's important.
It is important. It is important.
And the number one thing you can ask is is literally Jesus.
Where were you? Not Jesus, where were you?
No, he was there. Where was he?
Let him show you where he was because he was there.
He would Where would else would he be?
If your child was hurting where Where would you be?
You would be there. And how much better of a father
is he? And to go back to what you were
saying about memories does you know it's a whole journey like
what you said about No Rod. You're not ready to go there
until you're looking at me. Yes.
Because there's a testimony in
our memories and. When I got some of these
memories back, I saw them again. But I wasn't retraumatized by
them because I was looking at them through Jesus.
It was like he shielded me from being retraumatized by
remembering things. But you know what I got out of
it. For one, I saw him there, and
for two my testimony is written. In Heaven.
And it is a testimony to the condemnation of our enemy.
And it affects more than me. My testimony affects more than
me. It's not just about how good God
has been to Carly. This is about every piece of my
soul that the enemy has trafficked and tortured and
utilized for evil agendas being taken back from His Kingdom
cleanse and given back to me. You know why?
You know why that affects everybody else, too?
Because we are one body. Go in a room with some crabby,
energetic vampire you. You will feel drained.
So how much more? When I am whole, does that not
affect the people around me? Does that not affect the body of
Christ? Not only that, but he's sewing
into his own condemnation. Every memory I get back, it's
it's a nail in his coffin. Yes, and Amen.
Because I'll tell you what, if I got one skin cell in the camp of
the enemy, I'm coming for it. You don't get anything of mine
because you know what they do, they utilize we.
There is nothing more powerful in this world than Yahweh
himself and he lives in us. So any fragment of us that is
utilized by the camp, it's coveted.
And there's, you know, people would love to find oil on their
property, right? Because bam, now they're rich
because it's utilized to to energize the world.
It runs economies, right? And if that's true for something
as simple as oil, imagine what you are energetically.
You are the image and likeness of Yahweh, and the energy that
he is, is you. He he took his essence and made
you that energy can power a lot more than cities, folks.
And if even the little bit it's of it, it's in the camp of the
enemy. It's a problem not only because
it's it's inevitably tethered to your life experiences, but it's
giving. Energy to an evil agenda.
And so my point in saying all that is to say yes, getting the
memory back is scary. Yes, there's times and seasons.
We have to be looking at the Lord.
We have to be looking at it with the Lord.
It's not all at once. That wouldn't be merciful.
But it's important to remember because you can't convict
somebody of a crime if there's no witnesses.
And I stole that from Dan because it was really hard to
understand. Like, how do we do?
Why do I have to remember this? And then he said that in one
sermon somewhere. Y'all better just check it out
because you'll find you'll find the gems for yourself in season.
It's like you can't convict someone of a crime without a
testimony without a witness. You're the witness and every
part of ourselves that we get back.
We that's our inheritance. It's it's not just about being
able to, you know, live your life a little better.
This, our personhood, is his inheritance, he said.
We are his inheritance. What?
The one who was uncreated, who made all things, who was
complete and holy and perfect in all his ways.
I'm his inheritance. Oh, that makes me really
important. And that makes you.
Really important and all those things about you that the enemy
has tried to harness for his fuen fuen stuff he does.
It's not okay. We got to go for it.
And this is where strategic prayer comes in because we have
to go get what is his, what is ours.
And we already have the victory. So pony up.
I don't know what else to say. You just got a ride out.
Get your music that you love, get your scriptures that you
love. Find a group of people.
Who you can trust and pray with and pray and pray smart and wise
prayers, Strategic prayers. Because you will avail so much.
You will. I tell you, when I started this
journey, when I got saved in 2009, was it nine or seven?
I can't remember. My life has been radically
changed, but it wasn't me. I'm just walking with the Lord
like he's a faithful one. Wow.
Yeah. OKOK, so you're speaking my
language now that this is where I live, in this, this place.
I love hearing the testimony because we know it is only by
the blood of the lamb and through our testimonies that we
overcome. And here's another another line
from Dan. You're going to have a testimony
that is a justice case against the Kingdom of Darkness.
That's actually in the intro of the podcast.
Now, I I know that just speaking with with Dan personally because
this, this is the thing Carly God has people in the Kingdom,
in the body that he wants us to connect with for one reason or
another. It doesn't always need to make
sense in the moment. There's things that I've heard.
I've listened to people talk for hours years ago when it first
started to show and they'll be like one or two things that just
stick with me, right? It's like that never left me and
then I'll find, oh, that was a tool that that God was using to
give me from somebody else that I was to pull out and use for
this job, right. It was like that.
It's just right there on the back burner.
At any point in time, turn around and grab it and use it.
And I and I think that's interesting and we need more
people to speak up, to talk about their testimonies, to not
be afraid to go there. But we got to be strong in the
Lord. So like, there's this balance of
like we need to disciple people and and love people.
Like literally love them. Like just be there with them.
Like it. I was reading the scripture the
other day and it was like cry with who's crying and laugh with
who's laughing. Like anybody joyful, sing a song
to the Lord. Is anybody sick?
You need prayer, prayer and intercede, right?
And it's like we need to see more of that as well, because
there's there's plenty of like YouTube cool Christian.
I feel like Christianity is like kind of cool right now in the
public's eye in a way, because it's kind of the rebel, like the
whole world is like opposed to it.
So people think it's cool to be a Christian rapper, a Christian
musician. And I believe there's some real
ones out there. I believe there's some real ones
out there, but not all of them, you guys, not all of them.
The battles that take place behind closed doors, most people
never see that stuff. So you got to have people you
can pray with that you trust. And we need more Dan the balls
out there. We need more Carly's out there
at this point in time. Oh man, so.
Yeah, we need to wake up to who we are and, and and I think
that's where the rubber meets the road is when you're moving
in your identity and you're not living a life of watered down
identity. It's not, it's not a theological
exercise of personality, right? It's if you punch me in the face
and wake me up and ask me who I am, I'm going to know my name.
It doesn't matter what's going on.
Like I'm going to know my own name, right?
Because it has been with me. It is who I am, frankly.
Right? This name.
And the Lord has a different name for me.
But my point is, is that it's got to be so in us.
And how does this come? This comes by fellowship, time
and the Word. Realizing that God is with you
all the time and he will speak to you through little things.
Just like you said. That moment you, you cross paths
to somebody. They said a thing.
It's stuck with you. That's the Lord.
That's the Lord right there, and it's learning to recognize those
little moments. I tell you, I've had the Lord
show up and talk to me through the silliest things.
It's so simple. Because he it's not always this
deep esoteric searching. There's that too, right?
There's that, too. But there's also that time you
see a flower budding. And he talks to you about the
cycles of life and how you'll always be born again and again.
And there's always hope and there's always newness of life
in him. It's it's just that simple.
But we have to choose to, to look for it.
Expect the Lord to show up in the every day Ness of your life.
He will talk to you when you're folding your laundry.
He will show you how to be grateful in the mundane things
of life, because he's there too. God isn't just there to be met
when you're in your prayer closet.
He's there to be met when you're tying your shoes and you're
running your kids to this place and that place and you're
vacuuming your carpet. It's all the Bible says.
Do all things unto the Lord, Yeah, and and that's a
relationship. But we're talking about, we're
literally talking about a relationship, how we are
relating to God, because clearly he is there.
Whether somebody out there is listening to this or like, I
don't see him, though I don't feel him.
We can't always base it on on feelings.
Faith is is not by sight. It's not by sight, you guys.
Your faith can increase, grow if you whether you have a blindfold
on or not. You know faith is the substance
of things hoped for, the evidence of the unseen.
And I love what you said, Carly. I love what you said about
looking at the everyday things because I get distracted on.
I work in a factory 4050 hours a week, right?
You know, I have a young kid, right?
I got land, I got chickens here. And I'm like, I'm trying to get
all this stuff done. And a lot of times I'll be like,
I'll just have to laugh at myself and be like, man, I
cannot take myself too serious. God, I am like, go, go, go,
right. I got veins popping out.
I'm sweating out here and I haven't talked to you all day.
Lord, like, what am I doing? Like, what is going on around
here? Right?
And then I'll just start to soak it up with him for a minute.
But I wish that literally I had more of the training to see that
just by models, by examples, Carly.
Lord knows this is the thing. Next time you're shoveling
chicken poop, ask the Lord to be there with you.
When you're shoveling the chicken poop.
When you're when you're sweating and you're running around and
you're, you know, your frazzle. Lord, just be here with me
because it's learning to walk in the mundane things, right?
And and like if my husband were to leave my house and go be in a
different country for a month, if I didn't see him, let's say
our phones are broken and we couldn't talk, would he be any
less my husband because he's over there?
He wouldn't. It isn't the IT isn't.
If we've base our faith purely on our experiential, sensual
aspects of of our relationship with God, we're going to be
disappointed in seasons because. Sometimes you just have to trust
Lords. I'm struggling the chicken poop
and you're here with me because I got to shovel it.
You've you've made me Stewart, right?
You you you told me to tend and keep the garden.
I got these chickens now I got to bless them in Jesus name.
Maybe they'll poop a little less.
I don't know. But you know what I mean?
Give me more eggs, less poop in Jesus name.
Amen. You know But you got to in All
in all things pray without ceasing.
Do all things unto the Lord that mean what that is, is just an
invitation Lord invites. There's seasons in my life where
I like I'm a spiritual warrior, but there are seasons in my life
when I'm like I cannot. I'm just in my turtle shell,
like peeking out going Lord, I ain't going, no, Sir, I'm not
going out there. You're going to have to come in
here with me. And he does.
And it doesn't change the things that's happening in my life
necessarily in the moment. But I know I've invited into
him, into a place, and that's meaningful because every time we
give the Lord our yes. Every time we open a door for
him to come in, he's faithful to Sup with us.
And you know what? His presence gives us strength.
His presence gives us peace. And next thing we know, we look
back and we go. I don't know how I got over, but
I know one day I said Jesus yes. And that's all it takes, is it's
not always complicated. It's not always taking time
aside and stopping what you're doing, and that's great too.
But if you're in a seasonal life that you can't do that, there's
grace for that. Invite him when you're cleaning
the toilet. Like, just do it.
He's not afraid. He's not a he's not so uppity
that he can't be in the shower talking to you while you're
crying like he's got big shoulders and he's not easily
offended. So.
You know, talk to Jesus when you're on the toilet.
He don't mind. I promise he doesn't.
He just wants to be invited in. Yeah.
You know, I'm really happy that I love when the episode just
goes organic organically, just flows.
And this is, this is a reminder for me and for everybody
listening, just to include the Lord and more of what we're
doing. Cuz he's there anyway.
He's already there and so including him in that is really
you saying yes to God. I know that you're there and it
reminds me of what repentance is.
Repentance is a change of mind. It's changing our mind.
We we can change our mind about how we are dealing with things
about what's going on on our day-to-day.
It's just it's such a great a great place to come to.
Now we have, we have a close here in about 10 minutes.
So I'm going to say this right now, you're you got to come back
for Part 2 because we we have so much more to get through.
Yes, but I want it. I just wanted to say something.
I don't mean to butt in, but I want to say one more thing.
After I got saved, it wasn't all roses.
I ended up in a a church where the pastor was predatory,
sexually predatory towards me and.
In the light of a lifetime of brokenness and self betrayal and
condemnation, I was so vulnerable, even though I was an
adult and a mother of two sons like I should have, quote UN
quote, known better. And I think that's the thing
that Enemy often says to people who are agewise adults, but
they're not. We're not there yet because of
unresolved trauma and hurts and I really want to speak to.
I want to share my testimony in this place, and it's it's very
vulnerable and raw. It's not pretty to listen to.
Some people might not even like me when we're done, like, right?
But the truth of the matter is these things happen.
Church hurts. Go beyond being disappointed
that you didn't get crowned to Deacon, OK?
They they can become a rending of the soul.
That makes you question if he's even real.
And there's people out there who have lived that, like I have
lived that. And there was a point in my life
after I, after I finally admitted to my husband what had
happened to me, that I said to the Lord, Look, I don't know
anything. Nothing.
The sky might not even be blue. I might not even be me.
The seasons might not be real. Yo, I know two things.
That's it. Two things.
God is good. Jesus is Lord, and so help me
God, you're going to have to build everything else back.
Because it broke me so deeply, was like the culmination of all
my worst traumas took place in the church.
And it shouldn't be like that, but it was.
And there's a way through and there's an overcoming that's
available and it's not time to give up and it's not time to
pack up and go to the new age, no.
Because sometimes the people who are call themselves Christians,
they may be well meaning, but they got their own unresolved
stuff. This is facts.
This. Facts.
Wow. And it and it took a toll.
It took, it affected my marriage.
It it, and we've had to be building back ever since.
It affected my new family when I got married again and I had that
courage to get married again. But the Lord was in it.
Every step of the way. Not every day and not every
moment could I see it. But he has been faithfully
putting me back together since the moment I confessed to my
husband what had happened to me. He's been building us back, but
it's been a very difficult Rd. But this is where the Lord calls
people overcomers. Overcomers have overcome some
stuff. They didn't just arrive on a a
valet of roses. You have to fight for stuff.
If it matters to you, you have to buckle down and do it.
And if you can't do it, you invite Jesus into your I can't
do this right now. And I I would just love to come
back and talk about the truth of what happened to me and just
pray that it allows other people who've been through similar
situations to say to Jesus, yes, again, because he's faithful.
Absolutely. And you're definitely going to
come back. I know you just for a sneak peek
for the listeners you have some information or possibly is an
experience with Sasquatch and different hauntings of sort.
Quick left, yeah. Yeah, we're.
Want me to touch on that a little bit?
Little Sasquatch sprinkles. Just a little glimmer of
Sasquatch. Because I love Bigfoot and
crickets in general, yeah, yeah, I just, I have to go there and
we're going to do this as as literally because the audience
is going to expect us to talk about this when you come back.
And and I think that that's going to be a lot of fun.
But give us a couple little glimmers here of Sasquatch.
What's going on there? What's going on?
With Sasquatch soup? Okay so.
My grandparents of my mom's mom's house was haunted and
crazy and weird and at night my this was out by the Shaquanmaga
National Forest out in Wisconsin, North Central,
Wisconsin, little town, middle of nowhere.
You can see the whole Milky Way in the sky at night, legit
nowhere'sville. And so there was always my
grandma would call them poltergeist and they'd move
things around the house and and there'd be there's this one room
that there were shadow people and dark.
Cold. It was always cold.
It was. It was strange.
But the Sasquatch thing was my grandma would always shut the
curtains at night. Because that's funny, because
not everybody in my family is sensitive to it, but there was a
handful of us that were and it just felt like someone was
watching us through the window. So nobody would want to look out
the window at night. My grandma actually went so far
as to have a history of the land, to see, like where they're
at Native American burial grounds or something, because
the place was just weird. But one night, this is the
Sasquatch encounter. You won't find me on Sasquatch
Chronicles because it's too short of a story, but it's
perfect for this timing. So my grandma had just passed
away and my whole family was at the house.
And it was old farmhouse. You walk out the door and you
got to walk a little ways to the car.
Ever the people who are sensitive to these things, we we
did not go outside at night by ourselves because it just was
freaky. It was freaky.
But this time I'm like, you know what?
I'm saved. I got Jesus, me and Jesus, we're
going to the car. Hey.
So I it's night. I walk out and I go to my car to
get whatever I was going to get. And I looked down the driveway
between the garage and the barn, and there was like this.
It's hard to tell but I would say about 8 or 9 feet tall based
on a tree that it was standing next to hulking black figure.
And the reason why I say was Sasquatch is because the build
it was like the head of the thing was my God, it was like 2
huge watermelons and there was probably 4 1/2 feet wide and it
was because there was a light down that way down the hill it
was in relief. So.
I couldn't see features because the light was behind the thing
down the yard, probably 25 yards, based on me eyeballing a
football field in my brain, OK, And and I just looked at it and
I stopped and look and I'm like frozen.
And this thing's looking at me. And I just grabbed my stuff,
shut the door. I was like, Lord, this devil
Sasquatch thing is not going to see me running.
So I'm not running. Right.
So I start to, like, walk quickly controlled way back to
the house and went inside and I told my mom, she's like, you
shouldn't even be going outside at night by yourself.
Wow. But that was The thing is, is
between always feeling like someone's looking through the
window and then this one occurrence, you know, and I've
seen spirits before. I've that's a whole nother
thing. That's another podcast for
another day. But between the Ouija board and
my own seances and channeling and trying to resurrect the soul
of my dead father, I've seen a lot of spiritual stuff.
And this was not that. This was a very physical
something. So you see the silhouette of of
the Bigfoot, right? And and now let's end it with
this Okay, what do you think it was?
A physical creature? Completely physical?
Or do you think it was a spiritual being that manifested
into the physical? What do you think Sasquatch is?
Yeah, but that's that's a loaded question.
The reason why I think this was a the reason why I think it's
both. I think just like all creation,
it's sentient. It has self-awareness, it has
spiritual stuff about it. It's a it was a physical thing,
so it's physically there, but. You know you can't feel the
energy of something that isn't alive.
If you take a dead flower and put it on the table, you're not
really going to be able to feel the energy of it is not an
animate object, right? Only the things that are alive
and have an energetic feel. The soul, if you will.
I hesitate to use that term technically, but then you can
feel it, so I think. As far as the whole Sasquatch
conversation goes, I think they are, they're different.
There's there's different ones that can do different things.
Just like people, we have different gifts, we have
different abilities and and maybe some of us are lumped
into, you know, having a prophetic bent or some of us are
lumped into this. I think Sasquatch is the same
way. It's the it's a physical entity
that has supernatural expressions and abilities.
So people have talked about it cloaking.
Or disappearing or. Or its energy, like debilitating
you. The frequency of its voice.
I think all of these things lend to believing that it has a
spiritual ability that is different than our own.
So I would say it's both. And yeah, I really like, I
really like your answer. I I feel very, very similar.
I still haven't made my mind up 100%, but I know it's not just
an ape man running around out in the woods.
It's so much more than that. And I've never had an encounter
with one but but I've, you know dealt with some other cryptids
if you will. And from what I hear it sounds
very similar, the way that these things make you feel and the
presence that they carry. And it's a battle we we're in a
battlefield that all of this is it's a battlefield.
And Carly, it was it was a pleasure to have you on and we
didn't get into enough of your story.
So a Part 2 is guaranteed and I just want to I just want to give
you a real quick space. If if you have some kind of
winding down words for us here and if you have anything where
if a listener wants to reach out to you, if you have like a
social media site or just anything at all, feel free to
plug that and give us some closing thoughts and words just
on your experience here this far and.
I think you could put it in the show notes.
You could just share my Gmail account.
I'm not big on social media like.
You know, China's watching us, Facebook censoring us.
So what are we going to say? My face, my social media is not
very interesting, folks. So if you do want to reach out
to me for some other reason, just e-mail me.
I'll give Rod that information, as in, in closing thoughts.
You're not disqualified because of the things that you've been
through. God.
God can love you back into wholeness.
It's not a snap of a finger. It's not an easy Rd.
But you get closer every time you give him your yes.
And there's hope. There's hope for people who
maybe don't know him know Jesus, it's not another moral code to
live by. You could pick a moral code from
any religions of the world. Jesus is the embodiment of all
of creation, including you. It's it's not about learning to
not do this and to start doing that.
It's about learning truly who you are in Him because you're
not separate. And if you've spent your life
feeling separate from something that's bigger than you, I
promise you. If you genuinely seek truth in
your life, you will land at Jesus.
You will land at Jesus. I I took a long, windy crazy Rd.
but I got there too, and if he could bring me there, his hand
isn't far from you. And so I hope you come back for
Part 2, because we're going to talk about some of the harder
things, some of the testimonies, cosmic justice cases.
As Daniel says, and and we're going to stomp the devil in the
face, because you know what, that's what he's got coming.
So I'm going to tell my testimony and it's going to be
vulnerable and real, but I'm not ashamed and I don't think
anybody else should be either. Because the truth be told is
that vulnerability is a weapon of the Lord as well.
Because you know what? Nobody can hurt me.
They can't hurt me. I can tell you the dark and
crazy horrible things, the terrible decisions I've made, as
ugly as I've been, and who can take something, Who can take
something from me without the Lord say so?
I better. I'd be vulnerable and honest
with the things that I've been through and help somebody else
than to be afraid of what somebody else might think.
God forbid. Psalms 106.
Praise ye the Lord, Oh give thanks unto the Lord, for he is
good for his mercy. Endureth forever, who can utter
the mighty acts of the Lord? Who can show forth all of his
praise? Blessed are they that keep
judgment, and he that do with righteousness.
At all times. Remember Me, Lord, with thy
favor that thou bearest unto their people.
Oh, visit me with thy salvation, that I might see the good of
that chosen, that I may rejoice in the gladness of thy nation,
that I may glory with thine inheritance.
Carly, it was an honor to have you here and to hear your story.
I know that this one was an emotional roller coaster, and we
didn't even get into the meat of her story yet.
This is just an introduction, so share this one with your
friends, family members, with your coworker.
Thank you. That's all man.
God bless. And goodbye.