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Welcome back to Couple Goals. 
Here we are. 

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We're at it again and very 
exciting news. 

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What's the exciting news? 
We're going to Mexico tomorrow. 

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We are. 
That is the exciting news. 

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I know I'm all packed pretty 
much. 

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Of course, I'm a little bit 
worried. 

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I think you need to weigh my 
suitcase as usual. 

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I'm worried because I feel like 
I don't have enough stuff. 

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I'm taking 2 bags because I'm 
going on the road for three 

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months afterwards. 
And they're both empty. 

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So, and they're both empty. 
Yeah, this is amazing. 

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It's. 
Great news for me because I can 

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fill it with stuff, but then 
it's a bit of a worry for the 

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way back. 
Yeah well I was just like I'll 

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need 2 bags for sure and then I 
literally went to pack all my 

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stuff yesterday and I had half 
of 1 bag full you so I'm clearly

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missing some of. 
Your T-shirts. 

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I think you need new T-shirts. 
The problem is I only have man 

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that can shirts, shepherd shirts
and that's it. 

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Yeah, and then you get a couple 
of dress shirts for dinners. 

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Yeah, but I don't have any, just
like plain white ones, which 

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isn't that bad. 
No, I'm a walking even these. 

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Ones are like starting to really
wear. 

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Yeah, but I like what I wear and
I wear it. 

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You know, if I paid 25 bucks for
a shirt, I'm going to get 25 

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years out of it. 
Right, right. 

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So you did something this 
morning. 

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I was at coffee with the boys. 
Who did you have? 

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Coffee with I had coffee with 
James, Liam and Jezza. 

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Right. 
And my phone started blowing up.

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I had no idea what was going on.
And you posted something on 

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social media. 
I. 

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Did and. 
I think it's probably a good 

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place to start. 
It's probably a good place for 

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this whole episode. 
So we're not going to do our get

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to know us because this one is 
really getting to know us. 

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I think what Amy posted, it's 
cool because now we can sort of 

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don't have to be careful what we
talk about. 

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I feel like the last couple of 
weeks of the last bit, as we've 

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been going through what Amy's 
going to talk about, we've had 

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to like sort of sidestep or 
tread carefully around this 

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conversation, but Amy's done it.
Yeah, I think we've been wanting

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to share the news that we are 
have been diagnosed with 

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unexplained infertility. 
Love that for us and I didn't. 

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Realize we were diagnosed. 
Yeah, it's a diagnosis. 

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It's a real I think it's it's a 
big disease, I. 

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Think that's No, I'm not buying 
that. 

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Some people call it a disease. 
Some. 

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People not buying that. 
What do you think it is? 

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It's not a disease or it's not a
label. 

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It's like you just got to get on
with it. 

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Yeah, I mean we. 
Are I hate it when they say you 

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are diagnosed? 
I'm like, right? 

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Well, the reason they diagnose 
you is so you can get Medicare 

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benefits. 
Because if you're not, if you 

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don't have the diagnosis, you. 
Don't get. 

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So if you don't get the label, 
you don't get the. 

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Now that that can be good in 
this case, but in some instances

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it's probably not good. 
But we're not going to go down 

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that rabbit hole. 
Let's talk about this. 

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Yeah. 
So I don't know. 

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I've just, we've been dealing 
with it for years. 

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I guess All in all, probably 2 
years we've been trying for a 

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Stuart Little. 
I've never heard you say that, 

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Stuart Little. 
I like that. 

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But it hasn't been easy for us. 
It's. 

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Been fun. 
For the most part, I don't know,

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I don't think it's been fun. 
Lucky it was fun for a while. 

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I'm like, oh, this is exciting 
and new and we're going to have 

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a baby soon and month after 
month goes on and no baby. 

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It's crazy to me that you spend 
so much time in your young years

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doing whatever you can from a 
contraceptive standpoint so you 

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don't get pregnant. 
Meaning condoms, the pill, the 

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pull out method. 
Everyone knows what I know, but 

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I just wanted to take them down.
My, my, my idea of it anyway. 

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And then you just go for it and 
you've just realized that it's 

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not as easy as first thought for
us anyway. 

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So I'm like, I've wasted a lot 
of money on condoms, 

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contraceptive. 
We're trying to make light heart

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of a frustrating situation. 
Yeah, that's right. 

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Yeah. 
And I guess we didn't say 

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anything earlier or make it 
public because it is a really 

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personal issue, obviously. 
And also, you hope to have that 

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surprise moment for everyone, 
for yourself, that surprise 

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moment that you always dreamed 
of being like, oh, we're 

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pregnant. 
But that's something that we're 

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never going to have, which is, I
mean, it will be. 

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Don't say never. 
Yeah, like. 

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When we but not the traditional 
way that you always hope for. 

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Potentially. 
I still don't give up hope. 

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For what a surprise. 
Just for fucking surprise. 

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That's right, that's true. 
It could. 

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It could happen any day. 
Because we both know some of 

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your friends have been told they
would never get pregnant and 

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then they ended up pregnant. 
So for me, I'm like, OK, there's

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still things. 
And I've heard so much around 

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stress and so many things, yeah.
So I guess in my head, I never 

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wanted to even tell people we 
were trying. 

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I just wanted it to be not a 
thing. 

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So I think I was sort of 
probably in a denial for a 

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really long time, Like, oh, 
it'll happen. 

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It takes longer for some people.
Rah, rah sort of spoke to my 

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doctor about it. 
And they're like, OK, well, you 

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know, give it another six 
months. 

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And if not, we'll, we'll circle 
back. 

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And so, yeah, six months later, 
after already a year of trying, 

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I think that's when we got the 
diagnosis. 

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And then since then it's been 
another. 

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But maybe we should talk about 
what that whole process has been

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like because I think it's like, 
once again, it's shit. 

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And I think it's always worse 
for the women. 

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Like men definitely don't talk 
about it either. 

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And it's not always like men. 
Everyone needs to get tested 

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because quite often I think the 
blame potentially falls on the 

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women, I would say. 
But we've both done heaps of 

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tests. 
We did genetic testing 

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originally, like to make sure. 
Anyway, I think everyone should 

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do yeah, everyone should do 
genetic testing. 

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Just. 
We did that before we even knew 

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that we were having any issues, 
and turns out I'm a carrier for 

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cystic fibrosis. 
Yeah. 

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And the reason why you do that 
is if you both have sort of 

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matching genes that are for 
various things like you can 

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obviously they obviously 
recommend or give you the option

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for IVS. 
Yeah, so luckily Lucky wasn't a 

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so Lucky had to get genetic 
tested as well and he wasn't a 

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carrier for cystic fibrosis. 
I said I was a freak. 

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That means that's good. 
That means we can't pass it on. 

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We can pass on the recessive 
gene, but we can't pass on 

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cystic fibrosis. 
So anyway, I think I really 

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strongly recommend everybody 
goes before trying. 

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If they can go and get tested, 
genetically tested, it's 

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something you'll never regret 
doing. 

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But anyway, from then we were 
like OK, let's start trying and.

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It's like Christmas comes early,
you know what I mean? 

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Like for a bloke, you just like 
sweet, I can saddle up every day

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or whatever it is, but then it 
starts getting more. 

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I feel like over time you get 
more pressure on it and the 

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pressure sort of takes the fun 
out of it. 

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And you feel like every month 
when you're doing your you, you 

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check and it's like a no, you're
like fuck. 

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And then like for me as a bloke,
I'm so when we did our testing. 

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So as I'll explain how it goes 
for blokes because people don't 

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talk about it. 
I think it's a funny story. 

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OK, I don't really care. 
So I'm going to talk about it. 

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So when you're going to go get 
tested, the women obviously 

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have, well, you can Share your 
story, I'll share mine, get that

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test. 
But then as a bloke, you got to 

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go, you know, have this weird, 
really weird experience and I 

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went around the corner. 
So I'm going to tell this full 

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story. 
I've gone around the corner 

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because there's a fertility 
clinic just around the corner 

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from where we live. 
I've rolled in. 

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When you book in, you've 
obviously got to produce a 

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sample, like come in a come in a
cup essentially. 

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And so produce. 
Yeah, produce a sample. 

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I'm like, OK, yeah, yeah. 
So I, I've gone around and like 

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when you book in, they're like, 
do you want to produce at home? 

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If you live within X amount, you
can do that because you need to 

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get it to us within an hour. 
Or if you don't, you're going to

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produce in house. 
And I was like, that's an easy 

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one. 
I'm around the corner. 

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I'm going to produce at home. 
I'm going to lay on the comfort 

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of my own bed and do the thing. 
How nice for you. 

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How? 
Yeah, exactly. 

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Like, awesome. 
But I've walked in there. 

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Next minute, old Love's talking 
about how her son went to school

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with Amy and yadda, yadda, 
yadda. 

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And I was like, well this is 
weird. 

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How did she? 
Know checks the record because 

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you have a step to say who your 
partner is because they but 

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anyway, so then she's also like,
OK, here's your cup. 

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Just go in the room. 
I was like, I thought I was 

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taking that cup and I was going 
back home. 

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She's like, no, no, no, no, 
we've got you for in house. 

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So I'm rolling in. 
I'm like sweating balls because 

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there's all these people and 
they know exactly what you're 

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there to do. 
They they see it multiple times.

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I know, but it's not every day 
that I just go RIP it in a 

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private room. 
So it's very, and so the whole 

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time that experience is 
happening, I'm just thinking, 

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they know what I'm in here 
doing. 

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I can't even think about doing 
the thing. 

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I'm thinking about trying to 
burp a worm and fucking get out 

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there and get it done. 
And then I'm going to walk back 

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out with a cup and be like, here
you go. 

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And then you're like, is it 
enough? 

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You had to do it multiple times 
because we had to had multiple 

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tests plus the IVF. 
I've got some stories for you 

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guys if you want to hear more of
my stories of my testing. 

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I think that's quite a comment. 
Comment below because I've got 

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cheese. 
Like I've got some stories. 

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I yeah, if you're a veteran, I'm
a veteran. 

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And I do love when, you know, 
when I go for a run with the 

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boys or, you know, whatever. 
I give them the come and the cup

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stories and they've got their 
own stories, you know, for their

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own reasons. 
So can definitely pass some of 

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those on. 
But enough about me. 

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Let's go back to Amy. 
I think it's funny. 

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I just want to talk about like 
being recognized through this 

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process because it's been one of
my biggest fears. 

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I just like it's so 
embarrassing, like infertility 

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is embarrassing or just. 
Why do you find it embarrassing?

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Well, not just that, but even 
just going to chemist for 

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something personal and getting 
recognized is just the worst. 

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I'm not at a level like Ariana 
Grande or Taylor Swift. 

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Word doctor comes to you and you
can just like, have that luxury 

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of privacy. 
But yeah, being in the public 

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eye can be very hard for that 
reason. 

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Yeah. 
And we were recognized multiple 

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times throughout this 
experience, which is part of the

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reason why I'm sharing it, 
because eventually I feel like 

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it's going to come out. 
But, yeah, I mean, that's been 

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quite hard, especially in times 
where, like, I hadn't yet told 

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my family or friends yet. 
And I just was like, so worried 

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about somebody telling somebody 
who told my mom or something 

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like that because it was just. 
Yeah. 

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I mean, and it's embarrassing. 
You don't want everyone to know 

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your business or you know 
somebody else sees you in the 

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clinic like a fan, not 
necessarily a doctor or a nurse 

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or whatever, a fan, you know, 
someone else going through the 

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same experience. 
So yeah, that's been fun. 

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It is bad. 
And for anyone listening, like 

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for the doctor, any doctors that
listen, don't ever blurt it. 

225
00:11:12,560 --> 00:11:14,720
I reckon it happened like two or
three times where people are 

226
00:11:14,720 --> 00:11:17,520
like, Oh my God, Amy Shepherd. 
And then they're talking about 

227
00:11:17,520 --> 00:11:19,400
how they've told the other 
nurses that you're in and you're

228
00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:22,840
like, hold up, Isn't the whole 
point of coming here like 

229
00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:25,640
confidentiality and everything 
like that? 

230
00:11:25,640 --> 00:11:27,440
But then you chin wagging about 
it. 

231
00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:30,360
So then we're like, fuck, who 
else knows? 

232
00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:34,960
And so then you, yeah, that's 
probably why, what led us to 

233
00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:39,080
wanting to do this publicly? 
Because I feel like eventually 

234
00:11:39,080 --> 00:11:41,160
it's it's going to get out 
because people are. 

235
00:11:41,560 --> 00:11:46,200
And nothing against the doctors 
or nurses, they're just excited.

236
00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:49,880
Like it's not malicious, no, but
I just feel like it just takes 

237
00:11:49,880 --> 00:11:52,640
one person to tell another 
person. 

238
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:56,680
Next minute, the career miles 
on, they're like, hey. 

239
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,440
Yeah. 
So that wasn't a really fun 

240
00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:05,440
experience, but I think it's 
important that we've taken 

241
00:12:05,440 --> 00:12:08,080
control of our story now and we 
can share. 

242
00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,920
I think we just wanted to share 
it on our own terms. 

243
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:14,440
You know it's hard to share when
you're not ready. 

244
00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:18,600
Well, it, yeah, it's over the 
last couple of months, I feel 

245
00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:22,080
like we've wanted to talk about 
it, but it's probably getting 

246
00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:26,760
more to a point of acceptance 
watching you over, especially 

247
00:12:26,760 --> 00:12:29,280
over the last two weeks. 
You've maybe 3 weeks since we 

248
00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:34,240
went to Montville because Amy 
has been talking a lot more 

249
00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:36,360
about it to people. 
But then being like, oh, maybe 

250
00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:41,400
we should tell people or maybe 
you know your Instagram posts 

251
00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:44,120
and I was like, yeah, whatever. 
Like I'm easy. 

252
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:48,320
I thought I was and then when I 
posted I was like, holy shit, 

253
00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:51,400
now everyone knows and you're 
like walking down and you're 

254
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:54,760
like, does that person know and 
are they thinking I'm weird? 

255
00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:58,920
But it also comes back to like 
we've had, I literally went for 

256
00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:01,600
a run with a guy this morning 
and they're pregnant, which was 

257
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:02,960
awesome. 
And then we caught up with your 

258
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:04,760
friend yesterday. 
They're pregnant. 

259
00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:05,920
It's awesome. 
And then we caught up with my 

260
00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:07,840
friend last week and they're 
pregnant, which is awesome. 

261
00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:08,840
And in the. 
Space of a week. 

262
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:12,400
We've had three of our friends 
share their pregnancy news, 

263
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:15,120
which is like, you're happy for 
them, but it's also like a bit 

264
00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:17,440
of a punch in the guts at the 
same time. 

265
00:13:17,640 --> 00:13:20,280
It's such a weird experience. 
Yeah, and you don't want to. 

266
00:13:20,280 --> 00:13:22,600
Yeah, you definitely don't want 
to sound bad, and we obviously 

267
00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:24,440
don't. 
Then don't talk about it at all 

268
00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:25,640
because I don't think any of 
them knew. 

269
00:13:25,640 --> 00:13:29,040
Because after you celebrate the 
exciting news, you don't want to

270
00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:32,280
bring it down. 
Yeah, like, so what's happening 

271
00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:33,840
with you? 
When are you going to have kids?

272
00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:36,760
And you're like. 
You know, we're going on tour. 

273
00:13:36,760 --> 00:13:38,280
We're. 
Busy. 

274
00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:43,080
SO yeah, that's been hard to 
navigate as well. 

275
00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:46,880
But yeah, again, taking control 
of our own story now ripping the

276
00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:49,360
Band-Aid off because I think 
there was it sort of got to a 

277
00:13:49,360 --> 00:13:52,560
point where we had told some of 
our close friends if the time is

278
00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:56,120
right, if we it's always hard to
bring up, especially in a group 

279
00:13:56,120 --> 00:13:58,360
situation. 
So we kind of told the friends 

280
00:13:58,840 --> 00:14:02,840
who we had had a one-on-one 
lunch where we had the 

281
00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:05,680
opportunity to tell. 
So some of our friends and 

282
00:14:05,680 --> 00:14:09,400
family even didn't know until 
the post, which I feel very 

283
00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:11,760
guilty about. 
But it's just never that good 

284
00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:14,000
time to bring up infertility. 
It's embarrassing. 

285
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,240
It's. 
And you also, I, I feel like you

286
00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:18,760
don't want to talk about it 
straight after, after that 

287
00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:22,400
because we've already, I think 
when you're talking about great 

288
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:24,920
things, you're always like, if 
you are having a kid, you're 

289
00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:27,080
always happy to talk about it 
because it's new and exciting. 

290
00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:30,840
But if you're constantly talking
about the bad things, it's not 

291
00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:32,800
fun. 
No, it's not fun. 

292
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:37,400
And it's like, I don't know if I
told you I like, burst into 

293
00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:40,360
tears one day talking about it 
at lunch in public. 

294
00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:42,000
And I was just like, oh, I 
can't. 

295
00:14:42,120 --> 00:14:43,320
I was not at at lunch. 
When? 

296
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:45,560
When did that happen? 
It was like when I was still on 

297
00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:49,120
hormones, so, you know, I was 
very emotional. 

298
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:53,360
But that's when I realized I 
couldn't really talk about it to

299
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:56,880
everyone at once because it's 
just like opening wounds over 

300
00:14:56,880 --> 00:14:59,520
and over again. 
And I don't want to be the 

301
00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:03,000
person who cries at lunch. 
What a doubt. 

302
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:05,960
Enough, kid. 
But what it what has it been 

303
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,960
like for you personally? 
Like what thoughts have gone 

304
00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:10,360
through your head? 
Because I know I don't know 

305
00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,680
whether you're going to talk 
about the song, but I'm going to

306
00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:15,560
talk about it because people who
listen to the podcast deserve to

307
00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:18,560
know before everyone else. 
But you wrote a song, you broke 

308
00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:20,400
me with it when we're at 
Montville. 

309
00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:22,640
You broke yourself with it too, 
probably. 

310
00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:28,880
But for me, it's like normally 
when there's a problem in my 

311
00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:33,720
life, you can just outwork a 
problem and find a solution and 

312
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:36,240
solve it. 
But this is one of those things 

313
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:39,760
where we're very lucky. 
There's potential salute or 

314
00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:42,360
there's options, but nothing's 
guaranteed. 

315
00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:45,280
So for me, I find that really 
hard. 

316
00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:48,640
Yeah, it just takes, you just 
don't have any control over it 

317
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:53,400
really. 
I feel like we, we are problem 

318
00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:56,200
solvers and we've always managed
to get through things by just 

319
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:58,280
like working through it or like 
finding a solution. 

320
00:15:58,280 --> 00:16:00,920
But with this, it's literally 
just, you just have to go 

321
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:03,240
through the motions and like try
different things. 

322
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,800
We've tried everything. 
We're also, we also have a 

323
00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:07,720
natural path. 
So if anyone's out there 

324
00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:10,520
thinking we've just jumped to 
IVF because we haven't, we've 

325
00:16:10,520 --> 00:16:13,080
gone through everything, 
everything. 

326
00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:21,040
So yeah, it's been a journey, as
they say, and not a fun one. 

327
00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:24,200
But anyway, I'm glad. 
I'm glad that we can talk about 

328
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,760
it now. 
And I have written a song which 

329
00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:29,640
I'll release in a couple of 
days, maybe once we get, we're 

330
00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:31,000
going to Mexico tomorrow. 
So I don't want to. 

331
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:33,160
Dampen, I can release it to 
Patreon first. 

332
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:35,360
Oh yeah. 
Because they're loyal. 

333
00:16:35,440 --> 00:16:38,920
They're the people who I don't 
want to say care. 

334
00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:42,840
I don't want to say care most 
about us, but they're yeah all. 

335
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:44,600
Right. 
I'm going to share the song to 

336
00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,960
Patreon first, but please don't 
share it until I share it on 

337
00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:51,240
Instagram. 
I haven't recorded it. 

338
00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:53,440
It's literally just me singing 
to camera. 

339
00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:57,160
So if it people love it that 
much, I will eventually record 

340
00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:59,600
it and release it. 
But I think there's so many 

341
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:04,160
people who are going throughout 
saying journey, like just 

342
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:09,400
reading all the comments today 
has made me realize that I think

343
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:12,000
you hear the stats like one in 
six couples go through 

344
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,160
infertility. 
But until you actually like get 

345
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:16,319
messages from people, you know, 
even who are like, hey, we're 

346
00:17:16,319 --> 00:17:19,040
actually going through it, but 
we haven't told anyone or people

347
00:17:19,040 --> 00:17:22,839
who have come out the other side
whether they ended up with a 

348
00:17:22,839 --> 00:17:24,560
baby or not. 
Like I've heard all the stories 

349
00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:28,000
today. 
So it's been really cathartic 

350
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:31,800
hearing the support. 
And so this is it's going to be 

351
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:34,360
my gift back to anyone 
struggling with infertility. 

352
00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:38,200
It's definitely another reason 
why we wanted to share as well. 

353
00:17:38,200 --> 00:17:40,720
Like aside from the constant 
questions and laying around, 

354
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:43,600
like when are you guys having 
kids or are you guys trying yet?

355
00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:48,960
Or all of that stuff where you 
just say all the time, like once

356
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,080
again, it's coming from a good 
place, but you just get sick of 

357
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:56,720
it is I personally, when I 
started my business and was 

358
00:17:57,040 --> 00:18:00,880
dealing with my shit, I wanted 
to document going through it 

359
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:04,560
because I think it's as someone 
who admires seeing what you 

360
00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:07,200
know, we all get to see like 
people on the other side of 

361
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:10,720
triumph or, or whatever it is. 
And we mightn't have a good end,

362
00:18:10,720 --> 00:18:12,720
who knows, or the end that we 
want. 

363
00:18:12,720 --> 00:18:16,720
So, but to be along with the 
journey, like there's so many 

364
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:18,600
other people, as you said, who 
are going through the same 

365
00:18:18,600 --> 00:18:21,080
thing. 
So to it's, it's more relatable.

366
00:18:21,080 --> 00:18:26,920
We'll probably find and meet new
people who can give us stories, 

367
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:30,160
perspectives and insights that 
is comforting or helpful. 

368
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:33,280
Where if we tried to keep you 
keep it in and you go through it

369
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:36,040
alone, it's very isolating. 
And then it leads to more issues

370
00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:39,480
where you know, whatever those 
could be. 

371
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:43,640
So I think it's find a document.
And when I say find, it's like 

372
00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,840
for me personally, I love 
talking about things. 

373
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:48,800
I don't want to not be able to 
talk about things if I'm 

374
00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:52,240
stressed or if I'm frustrated or
whatever it is. 

375
00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:55,400
It's like it's easy to just tell
the truth for me, but I also 

376
00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:59,200
respected when you wanted to 
keep it quiet. 

377
00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:02,120
I'm more of a private person. 
I'm a shy person. 

378
00:19:02,120 --> 00:19:05,080
I don't like bringing it up. 
I think that's the hardest bit. 

379
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:08,000
It's like trying to find when to
bring it up. 

380
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:12,720
I'd rather just not talk about 
it, honestly. 

381
00:19:12,800 --> 00:19:15,520
I'm opposite to you. 
And plus, I find it just hard 

382
00:19:15,520 --> 00:19:16,240
to. 
Opposites attract. 

383
00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:18,560
Yeah. 
Which is probably why I'm a 

384
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:21,800
songwriter, because I find it 
easier to write a song than to, 

385
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:25,960
like, talk. 
But your song really conveys how

386
00:19:25,960 --> 00:19:28,560
you feel. 
How do you feel about it all? 

387
00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:33,840
Because we, we've spoken a lot 
about it, but I I haven't don't 

388
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,160
think we've ever. 
Aside from hearing the song, 

389
00:19:36,720 --> 00:19:38,720
you've never really shared with 
me how you feel. 

390
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:40,720
Yeah. 
And now that I've got you, 

391
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:42,560
you've heard the song in front 
of the camera. 

392
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:44,520
You have to tell me how you 
feel. 

393
00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:47,800
A. 
Mixed bag I think. 

394
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:51,600
Obviously very emotional and 
have good days and bad days, I 

395
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:55,000
think. 
And it's like, it's almost like 

396
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:58,000
consecutive, it's like good day 
followed by a bad day followed 

397
00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,400
by a good day followed by a bad 
day. 

398
00:20:02,520 --> 00:20:05,680
I feel grateful that we have 
access to healthcare now. 

399
00:20:05,680 --> 00:20:08,480
I think in America it was hard 
because, you know, it's 

400
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:11,000
expensive to even get a blood 
test over there. 

401
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,600
But also you have days where you
feel really sad and sorry for 

402
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:23,440
yourself and it feels really 
unfair and yeah, just like. 

403
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:27,720
Angry, but we have to even go 
through this when literal 

404
00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:32,160
crackheads can get pregnant. 
I keep saying that, but yeah. 

405
00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:35,280
And it's not not a good mindset 
to have, but it's the truth. 

406
00:20:35,520 --> 00:20:38,600
You just think, why not us, you 
know? 

407
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:44,360
Yeah, you spend, yeah, you spend
so long getting yourself into a 

408
00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:47,360
position for it. 
But I think, yeah, it all 

409
00:20:47,360 --> 00:20:50,560
happens for a reason, as much as
it's very fucking frustrating, 

410
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:55,760
but it'll work out however it. 
Yeah, and I think stress plays a

411
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:59,280
big part in this, especially 
with unexplained infertility, 

412
00:20:59,280 --> 00:21:03,280
Like when nothing's wrong, it's 
obviously like we've been on the

413
00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:09,040
go for years, 10 years. 
But that being said, it's not 

414
00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:12,000
like I can just stop and not 
work anymore. 

415
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:17,200
Like got bills to pay as well. 
So trying to find a balance in 

416
00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:18,840
between that. 
I've been getting acupuncture, 

417
00:21:18,840 --> 00:21:21,520
which has been helping. 
I just get like, you know, a 

418
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:26,400
small amount of time a week just
to completely switch off and 

419
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:31,600
that's been helpful doing all we
can really. 

420
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:35,760
Like what else can we do? 
I could probably not run 58 

421
00:21:35,760 --> 00:21:38,000
marathons because I know there's
going to be people saying that 

422
00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:43,480
eventually, but we've been, as 
we've said, tried for two years 

423
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:46,840
and that is the thing. 
So when we did all of our tests 

424
00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:50,960
on both sides, it's not like the
sperm count was there or any of 

425
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:54,080
that sort of stuff was cooked 
all the same on Amy's side. 

426
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:58,760
So normally if one of the two 
sides there's like something 

427
00:21:58,760 --> 00:22:01,640
wrong, you're like, oh cool, OK,
well now let's address that and 

428
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,080
see what we can do for that. 
But when they're both healthy 

429
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:07,400
and everything's good, you're 
like one-on-one make 2. 

430
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:12,800
Like that's math makes sense, 
but it's just not not working. 

431
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:16,960
So for me personally, like I 
feel that it is because we are 

432
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:20,760
on the go so much and I would 
love to slow down for a bit. 

433
00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:25,640
However, yeah, we've just moved 
overseas. 

434
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:30,200
So it comes. 
There's so many questions that 

435
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:33,680
could go on the back of that. 
But yeah, it depends on what you

436
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:36,640
want more. 
Yeah, I think it's going to be 

437
00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:40,880
our priority in 2025 to try and 
make a baby one way or another. 

438
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:46,600
So yes, we're still going to be 
going back to Nashville, but 

439
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:48,480
we've got different measures in 
place. 

440
00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:52,880
You know, I've also given up 
drinking a ton of coffee. 

441
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:54,200
I don't drink any coffee 
anymore. 

442
00:22:54,560 --> 00:22:57,320
So boring. 
Not and it's obviously you can't

443
00:22:57,320 --> 00:22:59,680
just blame one thing for 
infertility like it's not the 

444
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:03,920
coffee and it's not because it's
a full moon or like there's so 

445
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:05,760
many reasons I mean you're. 
Just trying to get as healthy as

446
00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:07,400
possible. 
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 

447
00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:09,280
And I've also stopped. 
I was running a lot. 

448
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:14,320
I was doing a lot of like high 
stress exercise and that just on

449
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:18,080
top of touring and all of the 
things I think doesn't help. 

450
00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:23,440
So yeah, if there's no reason 
that like all those measures put

451
00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:26,600
into place can't help. 
But we'll see what happens with 

452
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:31,400
this IBF cycle. 
That was a traumatic experience 

453
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:33,520
in itself, but. 
Do we want to talk about that 

454
00:23:33,520 --> 00:23:35,360
now or later? 
Should we just keep it all in 

455
00:23:35,360 --> 00:23:37,000
one episode? 
Yeah, later. 

456
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:40,400
What do you reckon? 
Oh, we can save that for later. 

457
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:41,520
I feel like it's a whole 
episode. 

458
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:43,760
So yeah, we'll we'll come back 
to that because we do like 

459
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:45,600
keeping these episodes around 
this time frame. 

460
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:49,160
So, and there's so much. 
To talk about with this, so much

461
00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:52,280
to unpack. 
This is just the initial, I 

462
00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:55,320
guess, discussion about it all, 
and there's so much to get 

463
00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:57,800
moving forward that we're going 
to share with you all. 

464
00:23:57,800 --> 00:24:01,000
But thank you to everyone who 
sent lovely messages. 

465
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:03,520
I've cried many times today 
reading them. 

466
00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:05,360
Just little tears. 
Little. 

467
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:06,920
Tears. 
That's nice. 

468
00:24:06,920 --> 00:24:08,280
I haven't read any yet. 
I'm going to read. 

469
00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:09,640
You're going to cry once I get 
into bed. 

470
00:24:09,640 --> 00:24:12,680
You're going to cry that it's 
just been going nuts and I'm 

471
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:16,760
like, fuck, I don't know whether
I'll, I'll, I'll read it 

472
00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:19,600
tonight. 
Yeah, it's been a big day, but 

473
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:21,640
we're going to go and have a 
lovely dinner. 

474
00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:24,120
Pizza, hopefully early. 
I want pizza. 

475
00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:27,640
What's my last pizza last night 
in Australia till March? 

476
00:24:28,480 --> 00:24:29,720
OK you can. 
I need pizza. 

477
00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:32,640
I reckon I need pizza. 
If you guys do have questions 

478
00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:36,280
though, like send them on 
Instagram to the couple goals 

479
00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:38,680
one, don't send them to our 
personal ones for the podcast. 

480
00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:42,680
Obviously send them to couple 
goals Instagram or even on 

481
00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:46,680
Spotify. 
Now you can leave like comments 

482
00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:50,840
or YouTube even or Patreon, like
wherever you listen to this, you

483
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:54,680
should be able to get in contact
with us and share your stories, 

484
00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:57,600
ask us questions because there's
the more we get to talk about 

485
00:24:57,600 --> 00:25:01,800
it, the easier it is for us to 
understand it, I think. 

486
00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:06,360
Yeah, I think it's been really 
raw and private up until now. 

487
00:25:06,360 --> 00:25:08,960
So still never getting it. 
But the more you talk about it, 

488
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:10,320
you kind of become desensitized 
to. 

489
00:25:10,360 --> 00:25:13,320
And also I think we're at a 
point where we're happy to 

490
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:16,360
share. 
Yeah, Well guys, thank you for 

491
00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:18,480
tuning in. 
We will see you next week. 

492
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:24,040
We'll probably be recording from
a lovely location in Nico. 

493
00:25:25,120 --> 00:25:27,120
Can't wait. 
You'll be having a virgin pina 

494
00:25:27,120 --> 00:25:31,840
colada. 
Like that's like one of my 

495
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:33,520
biggest disappointments is not 
being able. 

496
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,040
To they still stay on the same 
and the only thing you miss out 

497
00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:38,320
on when you're drinking tequila 
is like that slap in the back of

498
00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:39,840
the throat. 
Yeah. 

499
00:25:40,160 --> 00:25:42,320
So it's all good. 
Yeah, look, on the wedding day, 

500
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:44,400
if you see me having a glass of 
champagne, please don't judge 

501
00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:46,800
me. 
I I'm probably going to do that.

502
00:25:47,600 --> 00:25:50,080
Slight times 10. 
Obviously I'm not going to get 

503
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:52,600
pissed, but I'm just going to 
next minute I'm going to have 

504
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:55,280
one or two champagnes on the 
wedding day so I stay sane, you 

505
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:55,520
know? 
Yeah. 

506
00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:58,000
Sounds good, I love. 
That doctor said it's fine I can

507
00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:01,680
have up to four a week but I 
choose not to. 

508
00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:04,400
But on the wedding day I am 
going to have a couple so. 

509
00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:06,880
Sounds good, love. 
Well, darling, I love you. 

510
00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:10,040
I'm glad you shared it because I
think it's good for you. 

511
00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:13,840
Because I see you stressing 
about stuff and I like it when 

512
00:26:13,840 --> 00:26:15,920
you talk about stuff. 
Because I talk about stuff you 

513
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:17,320
don't. 
I know you're a little. 

514
00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:21,160
Bottle it up. 
Yeah, you bottle it up, throw it

515
00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:23,120
in the ocean and I put hits 
another island. 

516
00:26:23,120 --> 00:26:24,400
Well. 
It's good for songwriting. 

517
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:28,240
It is, but yeah, fair enough. 
I'm not going to argue. 

518
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:31,800
Alright, alright, as always, No.
Who root? 

519
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:32,000
Who root?