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Hi everyone, welcome to this 
week's episode of Inside 

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Thoughts Out Loud. 
I am very excited to speak to 

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someone very special daughter of
Bollywood royalty Sunday Dutt. 

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But even cooler is that she is a
practicing therapist who 

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specializes in anxiety and 
depression. 

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And we are going to have such an
interesting conversation with 

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Trisha La Dutt about how she 
grew up, her childhood, her life

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experiences, and how all of this
has shaped view of the world, 

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how she's handled the criticism,
the bullies, what she's learned 

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in her profession as a 
therapist. 

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And really just have a 
conversation that I think we can

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all take bits and pieces from in
dealing with the world at large.

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So thank you all for listening 
in. 

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And I'm excited to get started 
with Trishella Dutt on Inside. 

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That's out loud. 
Trishella, thank you so much for

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joining us today on Inside. 
Thought thank you so much for 

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having me. 
So I have to admit, I when I 

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started following you on 
Instagram, I actually had no 

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idea who your dad was until I 
like went back and looked and I 

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was like, wait, that's Sanjay 
Dutt. 

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That's crazy. 
And I loved following you 

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because it's just like positive 
vibes. 

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And like, you'll put these 
quotes on there and I'll read 

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them and all of a sudden I'll 
like find my piece of Zen in the

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day. 
So how did you become this like 

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beacon of Zen for the world? 
You know, I think being born and

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raised in New York had a lot to 
do with it. 

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Coming from a Bollywood family 
and then being raised as a 

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normal girl in New York had a 
lot to do with me becoming a 

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therapist just because of 
battling two different worlds at

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the same time. 
Coming from such a prominent 

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family and then being raised as 
a normal girl had its battles in

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a way. 
When I was younger and being 

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raised in New York, I had faced 
a lot of hardship and a lot of 

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taunting from just people around
me, a lot of children around me,

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because I was a child at the 
time and I didn't have a safe 

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space. 
What did they? 

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Taunt you for was it being 
Indian? 

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Was it what you looked like? 
Was it? 

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What was it? 
The bullying started when I was 

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about 5 or 6, and it was me 
being Indian, me having my 

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eyebrows connected, me having 
frizzy hair, hair on my face. 

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I was bullied for that a lot 
growing up. 

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When I went to middle school, 
the bullying kept going because 

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I had gained a lot of weight 
during the time. 

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And when I went to high school, 
everything just kind of blew up 

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for me because a lot of people 
found out who I was. 

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And of course, one person tells 
one thing. 

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They project expectations of 
what they think that should 

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mean. 
And what I should look like, 

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yeah. 
Yeah, I hate hearing that. 

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You know, I, I was bullied 
mostly for for not being white, 

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for being a dark, for being dark
skinned, for being Indian. 

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Also had a mustache and a 
unibrow. 

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You know which I always, it's 
funny because my daughter is, is

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fairer skin than I am. 
Jet black hair. 

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And she was she was teased for 
it too. 

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And it's just like, man, 
nothing's changed in all these 

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decades. 
But I was like, you know what, 

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Ria, they're going to make fun 
of you now and then they're 

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going to wish they had the hair 
on your head when they're older.

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They really beautiful, gorgeous 
Indian hair. 

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And it's the best that I can do 
is, you know, find the the 

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strength and the pride and in 
what you look like and not worry

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about what others say. 
But it's like easy to say and 

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it's so different to live when 
you're a child. 

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Like what defense mechanisms do 
you have? 

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You have none when you're a 
child. 

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You just have yourself to rely 
on. 

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If you have supportive parents, 
I think that's a great thing. 

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Or if you have siblings that can
be your support to kind of lean 

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on and talk to each other about 
what you're going through is 

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great. 
However, for me, I was an only 

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child at the time and I had 
nobody to lean on except for 

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myself and a journal. 
And a journal. 

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And a journal and. 
When did you start? 

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What age did you start 
journaling? 

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I started journaling when I was 
about 13 years old, so freshman 

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year of high school is when I 
started journaling. 

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OK. 
Do you have any of those 

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journals still? 
I still do, and I still write in

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it today. 
Yeah, yeah. 

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And, you know, you said you 
really very much felt alone. 

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Was there anyone in your life 
that you could talk to, lean on 

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or were you was there a concern?
You know, I, and I bring this up

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because I think Indian culture 
and the sort of relationship 

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that a lot of children have with
their parents, you don't want to

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show them anything as a sign of 
weakness. 

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So was there anyone that you 
could talk to? 

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No, no. 
No, it was just me. 

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I leaned on myself for a lot of 
things. 

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Actually. 
I wish I had somebody to talk to

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when I was younger. 
I see that a lot, whether it's, 

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you know, over plucking the 
eyebrows and then they will grow

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back or doing certain skin 
procedures to lighten the skin 

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and then all of a sudden you 
have hyper hypo pigmentation 

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trying to bleach your hair 
blonde. 

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Sometimes the hair can't really 
recover from that and it's it's 

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hard and it's tragic. 
I think, you know, then I, I do 

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feel in general, the universe is
bending towards more acceptance,

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although right now in this 
moment, sometimes it doesn't 

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feel like it with what's going 
on in the world. 

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But I think it's one of the 
things as a mom, I always think 

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about is I have to really lead 
by example and I have to show 

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that I'm really comfortable with
who I am so that my daughter 

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sees it and feels it and she 
experiences it in practice. 

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And then? 
And then she can do that. 

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You lost your mother. 
Tell me what? 

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How old were you when you lost 
your mother? 

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My mom passed away in 1996 and I
was 8 years old and she passed 

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away from a brain tumor 
glioblastoma and she was 

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diagnosed in 1989 and when they 
found out it was already grade 

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4. 
So that type of brain cancer is 

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one of the most deadliest and 
most aggressive in human cancer.

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I have heard recently that 
someone recovered from it. 

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I believe there was like some 
viral Instagram article of like 

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one person who who. 
Recovered from that and I 

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remember reading that and I'm 
like wow, we've come a long way.

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If only. 
Yeah, so you're an 8 year old 

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girl, You're in the US, Your mom
gets this really like earth 

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shattering diagnosis. 
Your dad is in India and the US 

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splitting his time. 
Splitting his time back and 

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forth, which was very difficult.
My dad was very back and forth 

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because he was working and it 
was hard to stay here for her 

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entire treatment while also 
being an actor back home of. 

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Course, Yeah, yeah. 
So for for any listener who 

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doesn't know, Trishella's father
is like Bollywood royalty. 

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I mean very very well known with
an illustrious Bollywood career.

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Many many many roles. 
Most recently major Congrats on 

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Durander and Durander too. 
Blockbuster global hit. 

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I can't even wrap my hat around 
how a child would be able to 

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bridge their identity when their
father is like a global 

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superstar. 
How do you did you like? 

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Is there any part of it? 
I don't want to say that it 

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like, did it get to your head? 
Did it like? 

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Would you say it was more 
helpful or a detriment growing 

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up? 
I would say it was a detriment 

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for me growing up, Yeah. 
Because, you know, when I was 

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younger and my mom was going 
through cancer, I developed a 

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weight problem. 
I was very overweight because I 

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turned to food for comfort and 
it was a detriment growing up 

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because I guess everybody thinks
that, you know, if you are a 

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celebrity's daughter or son, you
have to look a certain way 

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because they are who they are. 
And I just didn't fit and I just

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didn't look the part of Sanjay, 
that's daughter. 

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Sanjay, that's daughter as a 
child was very overweight with 

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she just did not look glamorous.
She just, she wasn't. 

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What the what the people decided
that you needed to be? 

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Yeah, yeah. 
I wasn't what society expected. 

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Did that make you avoid India? 
I wouldn't say it made me avoid 

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India, but it made me kind of 
curl up in a shell almost, 

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because when you go to India, 
you're very exposed, right? 

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I mean, there's paps everywhere.
There's people writing things in

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the media. 
I just, I was already so Raleigh

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exposed in New York that I just 
wanted to keep to myself. 

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Any time I went to India. 
I really didn't want it to be 

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known when I was there because I
wanted to hide in the moment. 

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Anonymity. 
Yeah. 

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OK. 
When you were child, how often 

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were you going to India? 
Not that often because I was 

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going to school here, so I 
couldn't visit that often. 

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So my dad would come here to 
visit. 

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Yeah. 
And as an adult now, do you, do 

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you feel differently when you 
visit India? 

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I feel completely differently 
now. 

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It's it's I guess because I've 
grown up and I really don't care

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what people, what people think 
or what people, right? 

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I can go wherever I want. 
I can dress however I want and 

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nothing really affects me. 
And I think a lot to do with 

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that was because when I was a 
child, so many things would be 

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written about me. 
So many people would leave all 

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these mean comments. 
So, you know, I like to say if 

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to be in this business you need 
thick skin, I really don't think

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anybody has thicker skin than me
because I've been reading it and

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I've seen it all at a very 
tender age. 

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It's, it's heartbreaking to hear
because I, I like, we really 

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need to do better, right? 
We really need to do better. 

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And I think what sucks about it 
is you're talking about an 

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experience from a while ago, 
from decades ago. 

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Yet I don't know that we've 
gotten that much better in in 

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how we treat people, how we 
treat women, how we treat 

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children. 
But what I think is a real 

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superpower is there a lot of 
people who could go through even

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a fraction of what you went 
through, and they don't make it 

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out to the other side with 
confidence, with the 

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nonchalance, with the ability to
have thick skin. 

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Talk to me about how you got 
through all of that. 

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Like, what did you rely on? 
Did any of it happen to 

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influence what you chose as your
career path? 

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What I relied on was just food, 
actually, because food filled 

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the void and food filled the 
comfort, and I did that for 

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years. 
Back in the day, we had Xanga. 

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I don't know if anybody 
remembers Xanga, but we had 

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Xanga. 
We had, it wasn't Facebook, it 

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was Friendster. 
I think something like that. 

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During the high school days, I 
would write in my journal at 

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home and I would write on Xanga 
as well, just kind of expressing

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my thoughts and I would make 
friends through social media. 

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That's how I got a lot of my 
friends actually, because when I

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was growing up I didn't have 
many friends. 

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So relying on others from the 
Internet really helped. 

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Although. 
I I would not recommend that 

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right now because of the world 
that we live in, but at that 

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time it felt safe enough to do 
so because I had nobody else. 

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Yeah. 
Your last, your last question. 

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So I was saying, so I mean, it's
really remarkable that you've 

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made it to this point of 
confidence and living like true 

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to yourself and independently 
and freely and and so 

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successfully. 
It's not everybody gets to that 

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point. 
So you relied on food, you made 

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friends through the Internet, 
but at some point there had to 

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be sort of like a frameshift 
change in how you handled things

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to be able to successfully like 
grow past it. 

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How? 
How did you do that? 

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You know, my Mossy actually told
me back in the day that because 

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she would see me so sad and just
very, I guess in a way broken at

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the time. 
And she said, Trishella, 

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nobody's going to come and save 
you. 

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You're going to have to save 
yourself. 

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You're going to have to do 
something for yourself to pull 

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yourself out of it because I 
can't save you. 

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Your father can't save you. 
This is an internal thing. 

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So she actually, when she said 
that, it was kind of like a 

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light switch that happened in my
mind where I was like, if it's 

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just going to be me, then I'm 
going to have to do something. 

226
00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:36,680
And I did, I made the change. 
I went back to school, I studied

227
00:12:36,680 --> 00:12:42,400
on why people pick on others 
versus other people that don't 

228
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:44,520
get picked on. 
Why do they choose certain 

229
00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:45,880
people? 
And I just became very 

230
00:12:45,880 --> 00:12:48,840
fascinated with the way human 
mind works and how psychology 

231
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:53,240
works, how confidence works. 
And I just got very enamored by 

232
00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:55,800
the whole. 
I mean, I think that's, that's 

233
00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:58,160
such an interesting story to 
tell, right? 

234
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:01,240
That you're, I don't want to 
call it a defense mechanism 

235
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:04,200
because I would almost say it's 
an offense mechanism, right? 

236
00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:08,720
Like you're on the offensive now
because you understand why 

237
00:13:08,720 --> 00:13:12,880
certain people behave this way. 
And you can then almost predict 

238
00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:15,680
the behavior, analyze the 
behavior And what you and we 

239
00:13:15,680 --> 00:13:18,200
were talking offline about this 
before we started recording how 

240
00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:22,000
once you, once you've learned 
this about certain people, you 

241
00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:24,800
can't Unsee it. 
They pick on other people 

242
00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:27,800
because they themselves have 
crippling insecurity. 

243
00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:30,800
Something's going on here and 
that's why they're projecting 

244
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:33,360
onto somebody else. 
And I think once you see that, 

245
00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:38,280
it helps tremendously in dealing
with any bullying that you may 

246
00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:41,240
you may be going through because
you quickly realize it's not a 

247
00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:42,720
you problem, it's a them 
problem. 

248
00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:48,960
Yeah, I have recently understood
that when people pick on you, 

249
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:52,360
especially on social media, it's
because they are lacking 

250
00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:55,320
something from within and it 
makes them feel better. 

251
00:13:55,320 --> 00:13:59,880
If I pick on you, you become 
smaller and I become bigger and 

252
00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:04,320
it gives them this confidence 
boost from God knows where, but 

253
00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:06,600
it makes them feel good about 
themselves to bring you down 

254
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:09,040
because you're already 
successful, you're already 

255
00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:11,560
confident, you already have 
something going for you. 

256
00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:16,120
It makes sense to tear you down 
versus staying quiet to make 

257
00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:18,480
themselves feel better about 
them. 

258
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:21,520
Yeah. 
So if you had to, if you were 

259
00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:26,040
invited to an elementary school 
today and you could tell our 

260
00:14:26,040 --> 00:14:30,440
kids here in the US three things
that would help them with 

261
00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:31,480
bullying, what would you tell 
them? 

262
00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:37,040
I would tell them to stick up 
for themselves in a respectful 

263
00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:42,080
way. 
I would tell them to accept some

264
00:14:42,160 --> 00:14:46,040
accept themselves for who they 
are without trying to change 

265
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:49,080
anything about themselves. 
And the third thing that I would

266
00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:53,360
tell them and tell their parents
to is to limit social media as 

267
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:55,680
much as possible, especially 
when you are young. 

268
00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:59,240
Because. 
When you are young, your brain, 

269
00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:03,000
as we all know, is like a sponge
and anything you read, and 

270
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:06,160
especially if it's about you, 
you're going to internalize that

271
00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:08,760
and it's going to stick with you
forever. 

272
00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:11,000
Yeah, I mean, I would even put 
YouTube in that. 

273
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,640
I don't know if people consider 
YouTube as part of social media 

274
00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:15,560
or just like the Internet at 
large. 

275
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:19,280
But, you know, I watch what my 
daughter, you know, she has an 

276
00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:22,120
iPad and I give her some iPad 
time and it's YouTube Kids. 

277
00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:25,760
But if you look at the girls 
like the channels that she's 

278
00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:30,240
following, these girls, there's 
nothing childlike about them. 

279
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:33,760
They may be young, but the way 
they're dressing, the makeup 

280
00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:37,000
they have on their face, the 
aesthetics of, of what they look

281
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,280
like and what they're pushing is
actually very adult. 

282
00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:42,680
And I was like, turn that off. 
No more of that block, that 

283
00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:43,800
Channel. 
And I was surprised because it 

284
00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:48,320
was YouTube Kids and I thought, 
man, the, the messaging is so 

285
00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:50,080
pervasive. 
It's tiered. 

286
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:53,560
It's like there's a lot of depth
to it and it's insidious. 

287
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,040
Is that the word I'm looking for
insidious? 

288
00:15:56,400 --> 00:16:02,040
I think so. 
And it, it scared me because I'm

289
00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:03,840
like, man, I maybe you just 
don't need to be on this thing 

290
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:07,480
at all because I don't know how 
to control down to that degree, 

291
00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:08,960
the messaging that you're 
getting. 

292
00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:12,160
And you're a kinder woman than I
am because you know, my, my 

293
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,920
daughter will come home and 
she'll tell me these things. 

294
00:16:13,920 --> 00:16:16,440
And I'm always, you should have 
said this and you should have. 

295
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,800
And I don't want to teach her to
be like that either. 

296
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:21,840
But I think part of it goes back
to, I do think you should stick 

297
00:16:21,840 --> 00:16:24,960
up for yourself. 
But lesson #1 I always say is it

298
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:26,960
doesn't just mean that you stick
up for yourself. 

299
00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:29,840
Stick up for anybody. 
Of course, being targeted, 

300
00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:32,480
right? 
So you see somebody else getting

301
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:35,240
bullied. 
I hope that you are #1 right 

302
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,160
there telling the bully to back 
down. 

303
00:16:37,160 --> 00:16:39,120
It can't just be you. 
So like, you got to teach. 

304
00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:42,080
We got to teach all our kids to 
speak out when somebody's doing 

305
00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:44,360
something wrong. 
So I couldn't agree more. 

306
00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:52,440
I think, you know, I really 
believe in you got to like model

307
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:54,840
what these behaviors look like. 
And I think a lot of it starts 

308
00:16:54,840 --> 00:17:01,600
at home And when I, you know, 
when I put on makeup, when I 

309
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:03,440
especially because, you know, 
now that I've been on social 

310
00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:08,319
media, my daughter sees what I 
do, what I, she sees how I, what

311
00:17:08,319 --> 00:17:10,040
I say online. 
And maybe she doesn't watch my 

312
00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:12,640
videos, but she'll see me 
recording or putting on makeup. 

313
00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:16,920
And I, I don't want her to think
that like you have to put on 

314
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,599
makeup to feel beautiful or 
that, you know, so I really 

315
00:17:19,599 --> 00:17:22,160
started recording a lot more 
without any makeup on. 

316
00:17:22,319 --> 00:17:25,440
Or I've seen, yeah. 
And just being really 

317
00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:29,320
transparent about like what I 
look like and, and why I do 

318
00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:32,520
certain things or silly. 
But I like stopped dying my 

319
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:35,520
graves recently. 
And I was like, you know what if

320
00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:37,920
it's like my little way of 
showing her that like it's OK to

321
00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:39,960
just be who you are. 
And that doesn't mean you don't 

322
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,440
have to change anything about 
yourself. 

323
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:43,680
I think I'm a plastic surgeon 
for Christ, right? 

324
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:47,080
Like you have the right to want 
to change something about 

325
00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:49,080
yourself, but just make sure 
whatever you're doing is like 

326
00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:51,720
truly for you and not for 
anybody else. 

327
00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:54,920
Man, that is a hard lesson to 
teach in 2026 because we're 

328
00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:57,800
fighting the elements out here. 
I mean, there's a lot of people,

329
00:17:57,800 --> 00:18:02,400
there's so much information out 
there that can really absorb in 

330
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:05,520
a child's mind. 
So it's, I think it's great that

331
00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:08,680
you're modeling it at home 
because it does start at home. 

332
00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:11,920
The words that you say at home, 
even when you're talking to your

333
00:18:11,920 --> 00:18:14,360
husband or your friends, they're
hearing everything that you're 

334
00:18:14,360 --> 00:18:18,200
saying. 
So it is very important to model

335
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:20,600
that at home, even if it makes 
you uncomfortable. 

336
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,880
Like I've, I've seen you make 
your videos and there's no 

337
00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:26,720
makeup on and it's so inspiring 
and refreshing to see because 

338
00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:29,480
that's real and it's, it's 
natural. 

339
00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:31,240
It's who you are. 
There's nothing to be ashamed 

340
00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:32,040
about. 
That, yeah. 

341
00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:35,120
And, and that's, and I mean, 
you're as both of us have social

342
00:18:35,120 --> 00:18:38,440
media presence, there are plenty
of people with plenty of things 

343
00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:42,800
to say, right? 
And they are so emboldened to 

344
00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:46,280
say it. 
And so I do my best to, you 

345
00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:50,040
know, to combat that and say, 
you know, I'm I'm proud of who I

346
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:51,920
am. 
And I if I change something 

347
00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:53,280
about myself, know that it was 
for me. 

348
00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:57,240
And if I don't, that's fine too.
But I get worried when I think 

349
00:18:57,240 --> 00:19:01,360
about, you know, I'm going to be
40 this year and I feel very 

350
00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:04,080
capable of making those 
statements and having that 

351
00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:05,920
stance. 
But I worry about the teenage 

352
00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:08,360
girls because teenage me would 
have had a hard time with that. 

353
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:11,040
Teenage me already had a hard 
time with that. 

354
00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:13,320
I couldn't talk, I couldn't 
speak. 

355
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:15,440
I felt afraid to speak during 
that time. 

356
00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:18,800
But now I think that we're in 
such a different world that it's

357
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:22,280
almost kind of expected that if 
somebody's coming for you, stick

358
00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:23,480
up for yourself. 
Yeah. 

359
00:19:23,680 --> 00:19:26,680
What would you say is more toxic
Bollywood or growing up in New 

360
00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:29,640
York City American culture? 
That's a great question. 

361
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:35,200
What is more toxic? 
You know, it's, it's a hard 

362
00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:37,760
question to answer because I 
haven't really been in the 

363
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:41,000
Bollywood industry like that to 
know what it's like. 

364
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:47,160
I can only imagine of what 
issues come with that. 

365
00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:50,760
But I can say that it's not 
easy. 

366
00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:58,480
It's competitive, but when it 
comes down to what's more toxic,

367
00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:02,880
I think, I think each culture 
has its own pros and pros and 

368
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:03,760
cons. 
Yeah. 

369
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:07,720
Was there ever a time point in 
your life where you like, where 

370
00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:09,560
you wanted to be a part of 
Bollywood, Where you're like, 

371
00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:12,160
maybe I'll leave New York, maybe
I'll be an actress, maybe I'll 

372
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:15,120
follow on my father's footsteps?
You know, I did think about that

373
00:20:15,120 --> 00:20:18,840
when I was younger. 
I think I was about 16 or 17 and

374
00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:21,880
I have no idea what I was 
thinking because I wasn't 

375
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:25,200
thinking that I want to be an 
actor because acting is my 

376
00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:27,400
passion. 
I just wanted to be closer to my

377
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,200
dad. 
It had nothing to do with 

378
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:30,920
acting. 
I just wanted to be closer to 

379
00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:33,720
him. 
And then my dad had a talk with 

380
00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:37,440
me and he's like, if this is 
what you really want, we can 

381
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:41,280
talk about it. 
But is this what you want? 

382
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:43,040
Do you feel like this is your 
calling? 

383
00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:45,200
I mean, I feel like obviously 
he's seasoned. 

384
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:48,160
And if there's anyone who can 
really speak to the high highs 

385
00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:50,520
and the low lows of the 
industry, your dad's been 

386
00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:52,880
through it all. 
He's been through hell and back.

387
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:57,240
He's been through hell and back 
and he said, if is this your 

388
00:20:57,240 --> 00:21:00,040
calling? 
Like do you feel a pull to it or

389
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:03,120
is it just, you just want to 
spend more time with me? 

390
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:06,320
And I said, I, I think I, I just
want to spend more time with 

391
00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:09,040
you. 
Then he's like, then let's talk 

392
00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:12,720
about what you're passionate 
about and let's get you on that 

393
00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:19,240
track versus coming into an 
industry where you may make it, 

394
00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:22,880
you may not make it. 
Just because you are so and so's

395
00:21:22,880 --> 00:21:25,000
daughter doesn't mean that 
you're going to be an A list 

396
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:27,400
actress and all these offers are
going to be coming to you. 

397
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:30,360
Absolutely not. 
My daughter is enamored with 

398
00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:31,480
Bollywood. 
Oh yeah. 

399
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:33,840
And she says all the time that 
she wants to be a Bollywood 

400
00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:35,960
actress. 
And of course, I chose like a 

401
00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:39,000
very like prototypic field of 
science. 

402
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:41,880
I'm a doctor. 
And so I've no idea what that 

403
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:45,360
world is like, but I, I worry 
for her for the same reason that

404
00:21:45,360 --> 00:21:48,760
I, I worry about what YouTube 
videos she watches. 

405
00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:52,680
I just want her to be happy. 
And I think when you expose 

406
00:21:52,680 --> 00:21:56,680
yourself to your happiness 
potentially being metered by 

407
00:21:56,680 --> 00:22:01,000
others, I worry about what that 
what that is like and what 

408
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:02,600
success looks like in that 
paradigm. 

409
00:22:03,360 --> 00:22:05,680
I think when she's older, I 
think it would be a great 

410
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:09,160
question to ask her what does, 
what does happiness look like 

411
00:22:09,280 --> 00:22:11,240
for you? 
When you When I ask you 

412
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:15,200
happiness, what do you see? 
And if she says, oh, I see you 

413
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:18,600
and daddy and you know, my 
family, what else? 

414
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:21,440
What else do you see? 
Yeah, would be a great question 

415
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:25,040
for her when she's older so she 
can actually see what really 

416
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:26,960
makes her happy. 
Well, what I told her is it's 

417
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:29,360
not all fun and games. 
If you think that you just get 

418
00:22:29,360 --> 00:22:32,440
to go to glamorous parties and 
do some dances, that's I mean, 

419
00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:35,440
call time can be early in the 
morning, middle of the night, 

420
00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:39,560
days, days, hours through 
shooting with no days off. 

421
00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:41,400
You could be in inclement 
weather. 

422
00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:43,600
You could be in parts of the 
country that you're or parts of 

423
00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:45,480
the world you're not familiar 
with away from mom and dad. 

424
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:48,360
And I was like, so if you really
want to hone in on the skill 

425
00:22:48,360 --> 00:22:53,640
set, then you you know, she's in
bar than Optium and she wants to

426
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,200
learn music. 
And I'm like, do all of those 

427
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,200
things, learn to dance, learn 
about your culture. 

428
00:22:57,200 --> 00:23:01,560
You're an American kid, born and
raised, you know, in, in. 

429
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:03,840
Well, she was born in Michigan, 
but raised in California. 

430
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,040
She's an American kid. 
I was like, you wanna be in 

431
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:07,160
Bollywood? 
Learn Hindi. 

432
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,560
You can't even speak Tamil. 
That's what I speak, kiddo. 

433
00:23:10,920 --> 00:23:13,800
So it's like she you have to 
learn the language, you have to 

434
00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:16,520
learn the culture. 
You have to, you should learn to

435
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:18,880
dance. 
You should, if this is what you 

436
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:20,920
want to do, it doesn't mean it's
easy. 

437
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:23,480
You have to study and practice 
just like anything, you know, 

438
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:25,280
just like what I had to do for 
surgery. 

439
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:28,200
It's a, it's a craft and you 
have to hone in on your craft. 

440
00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:31,560
So we're working on it. 
She's only 9, but she does love 

441
00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:33,840
her Bardhanatyam class. 
And so we'll see. 

442
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:36,240
I told her if she keeps her 
grades up and continues to do 

443
00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:38,960
well in school, we'll talk about
theater and, and acting and 

444
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,360
things like that. 
But it's a, it's a scary thing 

445
00:23:41,360 --> 00:23:44,480
because no one in my family has 
been in, in that industry. 

446
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:47,360
And I can imagine that it's 
incredibly rewarding when you 

447
00:23:47,360 --> 00:23:51,560
make like, culture changing 
pieces like the one your father 

448
00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:54,640
was just in, like dude under. 
But I think it can also be 

449
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:56,080
crushing if you don't do it the 
right way. 

450
00:23:57,160 --> 00:24:00,160
If you don't do it the right way
and also if they're comparing 

451
00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:02,280
you against somebody, like if 
there's somebody. 

452
00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:05,240
Else always do, though that's 
the hard part to speak to what 

453
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:07,680
you said, building the defense 
mechanisms, understanding the 

454
00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:10,920
psychology of why people behave 
a certain way, what the industry

455
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:13,120
is going to put you through, 
right. 

456
00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:15,360
Drama sells. 
Controversy sells. 

457
00:24:15,360 --> 00:24:18,200
Come pitting women against each 
other, it sells. 

458
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,520
That's the biggest one, Yeah, 
that's the biggest one, pitting 

459
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:24,800
women against each other, which 
is the most toxic thing anybody 

460
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:28,200
can can do. 
Yeah, but they they continue to 

461
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:30,560
do it. 
I mean, even what I Love 

462
00:24:30,560 --> 00:24:33,600
Actually, it's like my guilty 
pleasure is, you know, all these

463
00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:35,960
old Bollywood interview clips 
will resurface. 

464
00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:38,040
And they were totally kosher 
back in the day. 

465
00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:40,320
But you listen to them now and 
they're super cringe. 

466
00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:42,880
Like you could never get away 
with asking questions like that,

467
00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:47,400
like asking actresses to like 
talk shit on each other and 

468
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:50,680
directly compare themselves. 
And like, you know, they would 

469
00:24:50,680 --> 00:24:52,680
say these things. 
And it's cool because now I see 

470
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:55,920
clips of like Priyanka Chopra, 
like sticking it to the reporter

471
00:24:55,920 --> 00:24:58,080
and being like, why are you 
asking me such a dumb question? 

472
00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:01,520
Or, you know, women being able 
to say, I do think that I'm the 

473
00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:04,040
best in the industry or 
complimenting each other saying,

474
00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:06,400
hey, I really like that film 
that this other person made. 

475
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:08,520
It was really great. 
She did a great job. 

476
00:25:08,520 --> 00:25:10,680
So that's really different than 
the Bollywood that I grew up 

477
00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:13,040
with, which those were not the 
kind of interviews when I was a 

478
00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:14,880
little girl. 
I mean, the cinema was fabulous,

479
00:25:14,920 --> 00:25:18,200
but that's not, that's not how 
the interviews went and that's 

480
00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:20,760
not how I think the 
interpersonal relationships that

481
00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:23,000
were pushed were very different 
than what we're seeing from 

482
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:26,640
actresses today. 
I think in a large part that I 

483
00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:29,480
think in a large part why that 
is, is because we're tired. 

484
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:32,320
Yeah. 
We're very, very tired of going 

485
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:35,560
against each other. 
And again, it goes back to 

486
00:25:35,560 --> 00:25:37,760
sticking up for yourself, right?
If somebody's asking you an 

487
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:40,600
inappropriate question, ask them
why are you asking me this 

488
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:42,320
question? 
What does this have to do with 

489
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:46,800
anything else? 
Yeah, what I have come to see is

490
00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:48,760
that people will always try you 
once. 

491
00:25:49,120 --> 00:25:51,960
People will always try you to 
see what you can, what they can 

492
00:25:51,960 --> 00:25:55,040
get away with. 
So if you're not liking what 

493
00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:57,840
somebody is saying, politely 
correct them. 

494
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:03,280
Or you can be blunt, or you can 
be very direct, whichever works 

495
00:26:03,280 --> 00:26:07,760
for you, but kind of let them 
know that I see you, that's not 

496
00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:09,640
going to slide, so let's try 
this again. 

497
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:13,400
Yeah, I love that. 
I love that people will try you 

498
00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:16,280
once. 
What do you think is the biggest

499
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:20,200
misconception about you? 
That I was born with a silver 

500
00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:23,320
spoon in my mouth. 
Yeah, you've been through a lot.

501
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:27,640
Yeah, I've been through many, 
many storms, a lot of dark 

502
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:31,280
clouds. 
Am I? 

503
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,080
Was I born with a silver spoon 
in my mouth? 

504
00:26:34,720 --> 00:26:37,640
Yes and no. 
I just, I did not have 

505
00:26:37,640 --> 00:26:39,960
everything handed to me like 
everybody thinks. 

506
00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:43,480
I had to work a lot to get to 
where I was today. 

507
00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:47,280
I have internal struggles just 
like everybody else. 

508
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:53,000
I'm not perfect and I became a 
therapist to let people know 

509
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:57,960
that it's OK to struggle. 
You don't always have to have it

510
00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,800
together and you're not alone in
this journey. 

511
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:06,040
And I think that also coming 
from a Bollywood family, I 

512
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,560
haven't seen anybody in the 
industry really speak on mental 

513
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:12,120
health too much. 
If if people are speaking about 

514
00:27:12,120 --> 00:27:14,520
it, I just, I haven't seen it 
maybe because I'm so engrossed 

515
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:18,000
in my own work. 
But I just wanted to be 

516
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:21,760
relatable to people to let them 
know that whether you're in the 

517
00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:26,560
industry or you're not, it's not
all roses and sunshine. 

518
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:30,280
We're humans just like you that 
go through a lot of hardship, 

519
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:33,440
and I'm here to tell you that 
first hand. 

520
00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:38,000
Yeah, yeah, I think being 
transparent about the industry 

521
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:40,320
is interesting. 
You know, Deepika Padukone has 

522
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:43,080
spoken out about mental health 
and she's very much platformed 

523
00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:47,640
it. 
But I think it's it is so hard 

524
00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:53,160
when people don't know who you 
are, but everybody assumes they 

525
00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:56,720
know who you are, right. 
So when you take a superstar 

526
00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:59,680
celebrity like her and she's 
speaking about this thing and we

527
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:03,200
know what we know from tabloids 
and random articles that have 

528
00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:07,680
been written, but like, she has 
no obligation that to let all of

529
00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:09,000
us know who she is. 
Exactly. 

530
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:10,360
She's an actress. 
It's a job. 

531
00:28:10,360 --> 00:28:12,480
You know, it would be like my 
patients demanding to know 

532
00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:14,400
everything about me personally 
because I'm their surgeon. 

533
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:20,840
That's not how this works. 
And so I think it makes it so 

534
00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:24,760
challenging and layered when 
people do speak out about mental

535
00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:28,840
health because everyone then 
contextualizes it with what 

536
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:31,080
little they know about that 
person and what they read in 

537
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:34,000
tabloids. 
And I just don't, I don't think 

538
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,280
they need to be related, but I 
find that everybody relates 

539
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:38,400
them. 
I agree on that. 

540
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:41,720
I feel like everybody does 
relate them in some way, shape 

541
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:45,280
or form. 
When Deepika did speak out about

542
00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:48,080
that, she, I believe she had 
talked about depression. 

543
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:52,440
I found that to be so brave of 
her to do. 

544
00:28:55,160 --> 00:29:00,120
I feel like if she talked about 
that 20 years ago, I don't know 

545
00:29:00,120 --> 00:29:03,040
how that would have been. 
I don't think, I don't think it 

546
00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:06,480
could have happened. 
I think that she was she was the

547
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:09,080
example for our generation 
because it was the right time, 

548
00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:11,480
it was right for the taking. 
It needed to be talked about and

549
00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:14,280
it was still brave, right? 
Like she still really took a 

550
00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:16,600
risk. 
But it was the right time to do 

551
00:29:16,600 --> 00:29:18,000
that. 
And I even look at like a lot of

552
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:20,560
Priyanka Chopras very feminist 
interviews. 

553
00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:22,640
I love them. 
I love her witty retorts. 

554
00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:27,120
But I think had a female actress
responded in that way back in 

555
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:30,560
the day, I think they would have
been called all sorts of names. 

556
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:33,520
And and I don't know that it 
would have landed in the way 

557
00:29:33,800 --> 00:29:36,920
that it has landed now. 
And that's also to say that both

558
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:39,120
of these women still get a ton 
of criticism no matter what they

559
00:29:39,160 --> 00:29:41,840
do, right. 
And I think that's that's the 

560
00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:45,200
hard part. 
And I, I feel very lucky because

561
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:48,400
I, social media is still 
relatively new for me. 

562
00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:50,920
I've only been doing it for a 
couple of years, but I have, I'm

563
00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:53,120
like a fully formed person. 
You know, I'm like, I always 

564
00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:56,400
say, like I love to, I've lived 
through surgical training like 

565
00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:58,280
nothing you say is going to hurt
my feelings. 

566
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:01,960
I had to deal with surgeons for,
you know, a decade of training, 

567
00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:04,000
you know, and I have kids and 
I'm married. 

568
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:07,120
And so it's, it's, I feel very 
fully formed in that way. 

569
00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:09,680
And so the criticism doesn't 
really affect me. 

570
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:13,640
But if my career depended on it,
if public perception was an 

571
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:19,320
integral part of of my career or
my or, you know, my ability to 

572
00:30:19,320 --> 00:30:21,920
survive in an industry, I think 
that would be really hard. 

573
00:30:22,760 --> 00:30:24,880
I think that would be hard for 
anybody because you're 

574
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:28,160
constantly in the public eye and
anything that you do, anything 

575
00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:32,800
that you say will always be 
taken out of context, right? 

576
00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:35,520
It could be anything that you're
doing will always be taken out 

577
00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:38,360
of context. 
So when it is being taken out of

578
00:30:38,360 --> 00:30:43,520
context, I think that the most, 
the safest thing to do is just 

579
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:45,880
take it with a grain of salt and
you can't make everybody happy, 

580
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:49,000
right? 
So that I think the most, the 

581
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:52,960
safest thing to do is just to be
authentic to who you are and to 

582
00:30:52,960 --> 00:30:56,760
live your life on your terms and
not what society or what anybody

583
00:30:56,760 --> 00:30:59,240
else thinks how you should live.
Yeah. 

584
00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:02,240
And it's one of those things 
that's easy to say, but it's 

585
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:07,040
hard to to live. 
And I think when people ask me 

586
00:31:07,040 --> 00:31:09,240
for advice or they'll say you're
so confident, how did you get 

587
00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:10,280
this way? 
And I wanted to ask you that 

588
00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:11,560
question. 
You're so confident. 

589
00:31:11,560 --> 00:31:13,120
You know, how did, how did you 
get here? 

590
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:16,240
I think we have very similar 
philosophies. 

591
00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:18,400
You know, I, it's not that I'm 
not open to criticism. 

592
00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:22,560
I take feedback all the time, 
but I only accept that feedback 

593
00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:26,760
from certain people, right? 
Close friends, family, certain 

594
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:31,840
colleagues at work, when they 
say, hey, you know, X and XY and

595
00:31:31,840 --> 00:31:33,200
Z, you know, I'm like, OK, let 
me stop. 

596
00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:34,280
See if there's a way to improve 
that. 

597
00:31:34,280 --> 00:31:36,440
If there was something I said or
did or what not. 

598
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:39,080
But that doesn't mean that it's,
I open the floodgates for 

599
00:31:39,080 --> 00:31:42,280
criticism from everybody. 
I I don't, and I say this often,

600
00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:44,480
if I wouldn't trade lives with 
you, I don't know that I really 

601
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:47,240
care what you think. 
You know, I just don't. 

602
00:31:48,280 --> 00:31:51,640
And I think it's because I do 
understand or I've come to 

603
00:31:51,640 --> 00:31:54,000
understand in life that it's 
exactly what you said. 

604
00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:56,480
If you have that much of a 
problem with me and you don't 

605
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:58,760
even know me, the problem is not
me. 

606
00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:04,040
How can you attack me or how can
somebody attack you if they 

607
00:32:04,560 --> 00:32:06,680
they've never interacted with 
you in real life, they've never 

608
00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:10,360
had a conversation, They're 
judging you based on one video 

609
00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:14,600
that they see or a question, and
all of a sudden they are forming

610
00:32:14,920 --> 00:32:16,600
thousands and thousands of 
opinion. 

611
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:20,440
This has absolutely. 
Not as what I think the pandemic

612
00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:25,320
actually is in the moment is 
just these, the unreasonable 

613
00:32:25,320 --> 00:32:27,920
number of people that are so 
comfortable making sweeping 

614
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:28,880
statements. 
Yeah. 

615
00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:31,440
And judgments about people with 
very little data. 

616
00:32:32,160 --> 00:32:34,240
Have you noticed that any time 
when somebody will make a 

617
00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:36,640
comment, it is always about what
you look like? 

618
00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:38,400
Yeah, always. 
Always about what you well. 

619
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:39,960
I always say I'm like, it's 
because you can't call me 

620
00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:43,000
stupid. 
You can't actually criticize 

621
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:44,560
something. 
So it's like your teeth are 

622
00:32:44,560 --> 00:32:48,600
crooked, your nose is too big, 
dire grace this set and the next

623
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:50,080
thing. 
And it's like, if that's all you

624
00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:52,400
have to say, I'm good. 
Yeah, I'm. 

625
00:32:52,760 --> 00:32:55,280
Good with that I have. 
I have plenty more to sit on 

626
00:32:55,280 --> 00:33:00,040
that I'm not worried about. 
It it amazes me how people 

627
00:33:00,040 --> 00:33:02,840
attack what you look like first 
because it's the only thing that

628
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:03,920
they can see. 
Yeah. 

629
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:06,560
So it's like, OK, you. 
Haven't allowed them to see 

630
00:33:06,560 --> 00:33:08,120
anything else. 
And I and I do that very 

631
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:10,040
intentionally. 
Everybody doesn't need to know 

632
00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:13,040
everything about me. 
That's reserved for my family 

633
00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:14,000
and close friends. 
Yeah. 

634
00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:16,600
And my kids. 
Do you feel free? 

635
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:21,320
Right now, yeah, I feel very 
free, Yeah, I feel free to be 

636
00:33:21,320 --> 00:33:23,680
who I am. 
I feel free to say whatever I 

637
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:27,320
want. 
I feel free to live my life. 

638
00:33:27,320 --> 00:33:28,720
How long have you felt this 
freedom? 

639
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:35,600
I would say for about 10 years 
now, yeah, I felt good where I 

640
00:33:35,600 --> 00:33:38,320
can just be who I am and I don't
have to worry about anything. 

641
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,920
Do you feel like your dad 
noticed the difference on the, 

642
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:44,560
on this side of things? 
Did he, does he ever sit with 

643
00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:47,000
you and look back and go, wow, 
you really are a different 

644
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:50,120
person now? 
Or, you know, was it rough? 

645
00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:52,040
And I, I didn't, I didn't see 
it. 

646
00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:54,520
Did did he perceive the 
difference in who you are? 

647
00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:59,680
I definitely can say that my dad
sees a difference in me. 

648
00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:06,000
He he's not as commutative like 
where he's like, you know, I can

649
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:08,120
see the difference. 
But he does say I'm really proud

650
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:10,120
of you. 
I'm really proud of how far 

651
00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:12,760
you've come. 
Just make sure that you're 

652
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:15,400
concentrating on your work and 
don't lose your focus. 

653
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:17,719
And I'm here if you need me for 
anything. 

654
00:34:17,719 --> 00:34:19,600
What's what? 
What has your dad shared with 

655
00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:21,639
you as like one of his greatest 
lessons in life? 

656
00:34:21,639 --> 00:34:23,239
That's a good question. 
I'm trying to put that I'll. 

657
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:27,239
Tell you, what I learned from my
dad is actually humility. 

658
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:30,239
And my dad is, he'll sit all the
time. 

659
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:31,600
And he's like, it was a simple 
boy. 

660
00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:34,199
I grew up in a village in India,
no shoes. 

661
00:34:34,199 --> 00:34:37,840
Sometimes we didn't have food, 
you know, And he's done very 

662
00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:40,360
well for himself and raised a 
beautiful family. 

663
00:34:40,800 --> 00:34:45,280
And to this day, I am telling 
you that man will not drive a 

664
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:48,239
new car. 
He will only drive like our old,

665
00:34:48,239 --> 00:34:51,159
old secondhand cars or the car 
my mom doesn't want, you know, 

666
00:34:51,199 --> 00:34:54,000
anymore. 
He's such a simple guy. 

667
00:34:56,159 --> 00:34:59,240
He hates it if we ever buy him 
new clothes or new shoes. 

668
00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:02,840
And it's, you know, he lives in 
this beautiful home and his 

669
00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:05,280
daughters are all surgeons. 
His son is a doctor. 

670
00:35:05,280 --> 00:35:10,040
You know, he has no reason to be
this humble, but he is. 

671
00:35:10,720 --> 00:35:13,640
And he's so grounded. 
And I think that is his one 

672
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:15,800
criticism of me or something. 
He's always reminding me is he's

673
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:19,280
like, don't get too carried 
away, bring it back, bring it 

674
00:35:19,280 --> 00:35:21,160
back. 
Remember your roots, remember 

675
00:35:21,160 --> 00:35:23,360
where you came from, remember 
what's actually important. 

676
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:27,160
And I do think I, I do a pretty 
good job of that, but probably 

677
00:35:27,160 --> 00:35:28,880
something I could use a reminder
in. 

678
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:31,240
And it's one of those things 
like some lessons you learn best

679
00:35:31,240 --> 00:35:32,440
from your parents. 
You know what I mean? 

680
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:35,880
And and that is what I I think 
is my greatest lesson from him. 

681
00:35:36,360 --> 00:35:40,320
I think for him, for even him to
say don't get too carried away. 

682
00:35:43,080 --> 00:35:46,440
I think that's such a great 
statement to make to your kids 

683
00:35:46,440 --> 00:35:48,560
by saying don't get too carried 
away because you could be here 

684
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:52,600
one day and in a matter of hours
you can be here. 

685
00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:55,400
So it's so important to have 
humility. 

686
00:35:55,880 --> 00:35:58,880
I think while you were talking 
about your dad, I was thinking 

687
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:00,600
about mine. 
I think one of the greatest 

688
00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:05,080
lessons I've learned from him is
to probably this also shaped me 

689
00:36:05,080 --> 00:36:08,880
too, is to help people, is to 
help people in need. 

690
00:36:11,080 --> 00:36:16,440
If somebody's having an issue 
with it, could be anything, 

691
00:36:16,440 --> 00:36:20,480
always offer to help them and 
never look down on anybody. 

692
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:23,840
Never think that you're above 
anybody else. 

693
00:36:24,680 --> 00:36:26,760
I guess that ties into humility 
as well. 

694
00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:29,240
Because I imagine your dad is 
someone who's also had high 

695
00:36:29,240 --> 00:36:33,040
highs and low lows, right? 
I mean, Bollywood is a crazy 

696
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,640
crazy. 
World struggling through 

697
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:39,840
addiction at such a young age, 
going through that, coming out 

698
00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:43,280
of it, then going to jail, 
coming out of jail, then going 

699
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:45,840
back to jail and staying three 
years over there and then coming

700
00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:50,040
back out I mean, it's I can't 
imagine what that must have felt

701
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:51,880
how? 
Was that for you as a child? 

702
00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:55,720
Because watching the world make 
assumptions about your parent, 

703
00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:58,320
Yeah. 
Well, you know more than anybody

704
00:36:58,320 --> 00:37:01,040
else who this person is. 
I imagine that was hard. 

705
00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:06,080
It was hard because I had, I 
couldn't talk to him in a moment

706
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:07,520
because he's going through 
something. 

707
00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:09,920
And even if I was calling him, 
you know, there's, there's 

708
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:12,920
people all around him. 
It's hard to kind of talk to him

709
00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:16,880
about at that point. 
But when the world is watching 

710
00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:20,200
your family fall apart, 
basically. 

711
00:37:20,200 --> 00:37:22,680
Some people are celebrating it. 
Oh, yeah. 

712
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:26,080
And I've, I've seen, I've, I've,
I've seen it all. 

713
00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:28,480
I've read it all. 
There was a lot of celebration 

714
00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:33,080
that he was going back there. 
Because people, you know, I 

715
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:34,600
mean, they have their opinions, 
right? 

716
00:37:34,760 --> 00:37:37,000
So some people. 
People, people think they know 

717
00:37:37,000 --> 00:37:39,800
everything about you, right? 
And yeah, and they're always the

718
00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:41,160
loudest, the ones who know the 
least. 

719
00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:45,920
So they say, you know, there's 
some people that are happy, some

720
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,440
people that are sad. 
And when your whole family is 

721
00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:52,720
falling apart in front of the 
world, it's not easy. 

722
00:37:52,720 --> 00:37:56,520
But I think a lot of people 
actually looked at me also 

723
00:37:56,520 --> 00:37:59,400
during that moment to see what 
would my reaction be. 

724
00:37:59,920 --> 00:38:03,800
And my reaction was that I have 
to be strong for him. 

725
00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:06,160
Were you, were you ever mad at 
him? 

726
00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:07,760
Like on the inside. 
No. 

727
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:10,320
Yeah. 
I was I was never mad at my 

728
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:13,640
father for for anything. 
He did the best that he could 

729
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:16,360
given who he is and the 
circumstances. 

730
00:38:16,760 --> 00:38:20,080
I I was, yeah, I was never mad 
at him for anything. 

731
00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:21,720
There was nothing and. 
Do you credit yourself for the 

732
00:38:21,720 --> 00:38:25,240
degree of maturity that takes? 
Because it's easy for kids to 

733
00:38:25,240 --> 00:38:27,120
blame their parents. 
A lot of kids blame their 

734
00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:27,720
parents. 
Yeah. 

735
00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:30,160
For everything. 
For things that they don't need 

736
00:38:30,160 --> 00:38:33,560
to be blaming their parents for.
I think I give the credit to 

737
00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:39,600
myself for that because, you 
know, for how long, even if I 

738
00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:42,640
were to blame anybody, for how 
long am I going to blame 

739
00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:45,920
somebody for? 
I need to take accountability 

740
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:47,280
for the things that I have 
caused you're. 

741
00:38:47,280 --> 00:38:49,480
Just such a wise soul. 
That's why I keep asking like 

742
00:38:49,480 --> 00:38:52,360
how is she this wise? 
I don't even have these defense 

743
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:57,400
mechanisms as a grown adult. 
I mean, was my dad the one that 

744
00:38:57,400 --> 00:39:00,440
told me to shove cheesecake in 
your mouth and to eat this and 

745
00:39:00,440 --> 00:39:01,360
to eat that? 
No, right. 

746
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:04,720
I did those things to myself. 
So how much can I keep blaming 

747
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:07,800
other people for things that 
have nothing to do with them? 

748
00:39:08,080 --> 00:39:09,760
I have to take accountability 
for myself. 

749
00:39:09,760 --> 00:39:12,480
And that's what I did. 
And I think that's why today I 

750
00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:17,640
feel confident enough to be who 
I am because I I accepted my 

751
00:39:17,640 --> 00:39:19,520
flaws. 
I accepted my mistakes and I 

752
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:22,680
worked on them to be a better 
person for myself. 

753
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:28,200
Yeah, switching gears a little 
bit, because you are a 

754
00:39:28,280 --> 00:39:33,360
practicing therapist in New York
City, Yeah, and you specialize 

755
00:39:33,360 --> 00:39:37,440
in anxiety and depression and 
you yourself have gone through 

756
00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:41,040
sort of a weight journey. 
What do you think about GLP One 

757
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,200
culture? 
You know what? 

758
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:47,600
That's the GLP one culture. 
If it works for you, amazing. 

759
00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:50,440
I'm not saying that you 
shouldn't be doing it. 

760
00:39:55,120 --> 00:39:58,360
Look, I'm for whatever makes you
happy and whatever works for 

761
00:39:58,360 --> 00:40:00,560
you. 
I'm a no judgement zone. 

762
00:40:01,720 --> 00:40:04,320
As long as you're happy and 
healthy and you're going to your

763
00:40:04,320 --> 00:40:06,600
doctor. 
Again, I'm I'm I'm not a doctor,

764
00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:08,760
but if you're going to your 
doctor and you're discussing it 

765
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:11,880
with him, you could do GLP. 
Do you think, and I'm not saying

766
00:40:11,880 --> 00:40:14,600
that I feel this way, I'm not 
lending my own opinion to it. 

767
00:40:14,600 --> 00:40:18,200
I'm asking because you are on 
the mental health side of 

768
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:20,000
things. 
Do you think that there are 

769
00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:21,960
people that are sort of putting 
a Band-Aid on the problem by 

770
00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:24,160
using AGLP? 
One where in fact the root 

771
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,520
problem might be mental health 
related, as it was for you. 

772
00:40:28,600 --> 00:40:31,200
It could be mental health 
related, but a lot of people 

773
00:40:31,200 --> 00:40:34,200
suffer from other issues that 
they're going through health 

774
00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:37,160
wise, which we don't know about,
right? 

775
00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:38,960
We don't know why they're on 
GLP. 

776
00:40:38,960 --> 00:40:40,560
One, no totally. 
And we know that the medical 

777
00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:42,440
benefits are are profound. 
Yeah. 

778
00:40:43,560 --> 00:40:47,320
I just wonder, you know, are we 
missing an opportunity to, to 

779
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:54,000
treat holistically 360° 
everything that contributes to, 

780
00:40:56,280 --> 00:40:59,920
to to a weight issue and 
definitely there are medical 

781
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:05,000
problems that are handled and 
managed by being on AGLP one, 

782
00:41:05,000 --> 00:41:07,800
but are we missing an 
opportunity to introduce mental 

783
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:11,920
health services as well? 
I believe there could be. 

784
00:41:12,360 --> 00:41:14,480
I believe there could be, 
because me going through a 

785
00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:20,120
weight problem, somebody else 
could be going through a similar

786
00:41:20,120 --> 00:41:24,000
problem and not really 
understanding where it's coming 

787
00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:25,240
from, right? 
Because for you to fix the 

788
00:41:25,240 --> 00:41:27,560
problem, you need to get to the 
root cause of the problem. 

789
00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:31,280
So where is this coming from? 
We don't really know. 

790
00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:34,600
So I think that there could be 
an opportunity to learn from 

791
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:38,240
there. 
But then again, a lot of times, 

792
00:41:38,240 --> 00:41:41,000
especially these days, people 
want a quick fix, right? 

793
00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:45,480
They want a quick fix for 
everything and anything, and 

794
00:41:45,480 --> 00:41:48,400
that's not always the best 
because if you're putting a 

795
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:51,280
Band-Aid on something and that 
quick fix, it's not there 

796
00:41:51,280 --> 00:41:55,240
anymore, you're just going to go
back to whatever was going on in

797
00:41:55,240 --> 00:41:57,600
the 1st place. 
So if it works for you and you 

798
00:41:57,600 --> 00:42:01,160
want to do it, I have no 
problem, but I would welcome the

799
00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:05,920
opportunity to try to really 
find the root cause of it first.

800
00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:08,360
Which is often multifactorial as
well, right? 

801
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:13,200
Yeah, absolutely. 
Durand there has been wildly 

802
00:42:13,200 --> 00:42:15,520
successful. 
Has that changed anything for 

803
00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:19,160
you guys, for the family or you 
guys have always been in the 

804
00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:20,640
public eye? 
So it's just sort of keep on 

805
00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:22,560
keeping on. 
It's keep on keeping on. 

806
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:23,160
Yeah. 
Yeah. 

807
00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:25,560
It's it's really just the movie 
did well. 

808
00:42:25,560 --> 00:42:26,720
That's amazing. 
All right. 

809
00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:28,480
What's next? 
What's next? 

810
00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:32,240
Yeah, I haven't seen the film 
yet. 

811
00:42:33,040 --> 00:42:35,480
Literally the film. 
Yet I was literally about to ask

812
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:36,520
it. 
You haven't seen either one? 

813
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:38,680
No. 
OK, that's so funny. 

814
00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:41,440
I'm really using this as a clip.
I haven't seen it. 

815
00:42:42,120 --> 00:42:44,880
I have not seen it. 
So I'll tell you, I watched the 

816
00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:48,280
first one, but I like watched it
like this because I am like 

817
00:42:48,280 --> 00:42:51,400
very, I can't watch violent 
things, but the storyline and 

818
00:42:51,400 --> 00:42:54,000
the storytelling was so 
incredible that I was like, OK, 

819
00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:57,040
I have to watch it. 
So I like kind of watched it, 

820
00:42:57,280 --> 00:42:59,680
but I haven't watched the second
one again because I just violent

821
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:00,960
things. 
I it sits with me. 

822
00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:02,880
I'll have nightmares. 
I don't want that. 

823
00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:05,440
But I've the storyline is 
incredible. 

824
00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:07,160
So that's hilarious that you 
haven't seen it. 

825
00:43:07,160 --> 00:43:11,840
Do you ever feel that roles 
affect your dad's, whether it's 

826
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:13,440
his mental health or 
personality? 

827
00:43:13,440 --> 00:43:15,480
Because a lot of actors have 
spoken about this. 

828
00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:17,440
And Ranveer Singh has even 
spoken about how, like, playing 

829
00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:20,320
Killji was like, they put him in
a dark place. 

830
00:43:20,400 --> 00:43:22,840
And you know, there's obviously 
method actors and whatnot. 

831
00:43:23,520 --> 00:43:25,200
Has your dad ever experienced 
that, where he played a 

832
00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:27,720
character and it like took him a
minute to kind of snap out of 

833
00:43:27,720 --> 00:43:29,280
it? 
I've never asked him that 

834
00:43:29,280 --> 00:43:30,760
question. 
I'm curious. 

835
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:34,000
I've never asked him that 
question, but now that you're 

836
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:36,280
asking me, that is a question 
that I am going to ask him 

837
00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:40,000
because I'm also curious now. 
Yeah, I've never asked him that 

838
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:41,920
question. 
I mean, it was an intense role 

839
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:44,800
that he played, that he played 
with excellence. 

840
00:43:44,800 --> 00:43:47,960
But it I wonder if, like, when 
you're immersed in that world 

841
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:51,040
and that's the character you're 
playing, how does one, like, 

842
00:43:51,040 --> 00:43:54,280
snap in and bounce back? 
Bounce back, yeah. 

843
00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:57,320
I will, I'll ask him and I'll 
keep you posted on that one. 

844
00:43:57,320 --> 00:44:01,240
Sometimes I like seeing him on 
screen because it just kind of, 

845
00:44:01,360 --> 00:44:06,520
it reminds me to reminds me. 
So I'll see some clips and then 

846
00:44:06,520 --> 00:44:07,960
I'll just be like, OK, you. 
Know I'm done. 

847
00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:10,400
He's a gangster in the movie. 
It's awesome. 

848
00:44:12,160 --> 00:44:15,120
You know, it's interesting. 
I recently came across a lot of 

849
00:44:16,240 --> 00:44:20,720
online chatter about how Deepika
has not like, been vocal enough 

850
00:44:20,720 --> 00:44:23,240
in support of her husband in 
this film. 

851
00:44:23,240 --> 00:44:25,880
And I think it's so stupid. 
So I'm like, why? 

852
00:44:26,440 --> 00:44:28,640
Of course she supports him. 
She's his wife. 

853
00:44:28,640 --> 00:44:31,200
Like, you don't have to put 
everything out there, you know? 

854
00:44:31,200 --> 00:44:34,400
It's like I don't have to sing 
my husband's praise every day 

855
00:44:34,400 --> 00:44:36,320
just because I'm a public 
figure. 

856
00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:39,080
He's my husband. 
Like, of course I support him 

857
00:44:39,080 --> 00:44:42,280
and he supports me. 
I don't see any requirement of 

858
00:44:42,280 --> 00:44:43,880
that. 
Do you think that's stupid? 

859
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:47,320
I mean I. 
I want to ask everybody why? 

860
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:48,880
Why do you care? 
Why? 

861
00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:53,320
Why does everybody care? 
If anybody is showing the 

862
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:55,840
support publicly, why does it 
have to be public, right? 

863
00:44:56,560 --> 00:44:58,680
Why can't we show support in 
private? 

864
00:44:58,680 --> 00:45:01,680
Why does everything have to be? 
For public consumption. 

865
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:06,040
Exactly, I'm I don't really 
understand the need for that. 

866
00:45:06,040 --> 00:45:07,600
So when I. 
Just reminded me when you were 

867
00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:09,120
like, I haven't even seen it. 
That doesn't mean you don't 

868
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:11,680
support your father and every 
real you know, like obviously 

869
00:45:11,680 --> 00:45:15,160
you do. 
But it it just doesn't matter. 

870
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:17,200
Like why? 
Why do not care? 

871
00:45:18,840 --> 00:45:23,520
It's interesting when people 
think that because I am his 

872
00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:26,720
daughter, that I have seen every
single movie of his and I follow

873
00:45:26,720 --> 00:45:28,160
up every single interview of 
his. 

874
00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:31,520
That's not that's not the case. 
But also that's like not real 

875
00:45:31,520 --> 00:45:34,960
life most kids. 
Like if your parent is a PhD, 

876
00:45:34,960 --> 00:45:36,480
have you read all their 
manuscripts? 

877
00:45:36,920 --> 00:45:38,880
You know what I mean? 
Like if you're, I don't know 

878
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:42,440
every single engineering project
my dad did when he, you know, 

879
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:45,760
worked for some of the companies
he worked for, I, I don't know. 

880
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:47,960
And that's OK, Doesn't mean I 
don't support him. 

881
00:45:49,320 --> 00:45:51,080
No, but everybody has something 
to say, right? 

882
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:53,640
Everybody thinks that they know 
better, that you should do this.

883
00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:55,440
And you know, why haven't you 
done that? 

884
00:45:55,440 --> 00:45:58,480
I think it has a lot to do with 
culture too, you know, like you 

885
00:45:58,480 --> 00:46:01,160
should be doing something. 
You should be doing it like 

886
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:04,080
this. 
And I think going back to what I

887
00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:05,800
said, that people like we're 
tired. 

888
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:07,760
We're tired of listening to 
that. 

889
00:46:08,080 --> 00:46:10,520
We just want to be who we are 
and we just want to live our 

890
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:14,080
lives on our terms now. 
Yeah, well, I sometimes feel 

891
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:15,840
like you're damned if you do, 
You're damned if you don't. 

892
00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:17,920
Like, I can imagine a lot of 
people don't say things publicly

893
00:46:17,920 --> 00:46:19,560
just because they don't want 
every single word of theirs 

894
00:46:19,560 --> 00:46:22,600
dissected. 
I think I I think that you 

895
00:46:22,600 --> 00:46:24,080
should absolutely have the right
to be like that. 

896
00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:27,240
And who are we to judge? 
I don't think anybody has a 

897
00:46:27,240 --> 00:46:30,840
right to judge anybody. 
I mean, I judge a lot of maggot 

898
00:46:30,840 --> 00:46:34,960
Republicans have you on the 
judgement here sometimes that 

899
00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:38,720
OK, go ahead. 
Live and let live, live and let 

900
00:46:38,720 --> 00:46:39,600
live. 
Whatever. 

901
00:46:39,600 --> 00:46:41,920
If that that works for you, I'm 
so happy for you. 

902
00:46:41,960 --> 00:46:44,960
If it doesn't work for you, it 
has nothing to do with me and 

903
00:46:44,960 --> 00:46:47,880
I'm just gonna carry on. 
Yeah. 

904
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:49,920
So what do you feel like your 
legacy is gonna be? 

905
00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:55,280
Well, I would hope that people 
Remember Me as being a very kind

906
00:46:55,280 --> 00:47:00,760
human being who loves helping 
others and who doesn't mind 

907
00:47:00,760 --> 00:47:03,640
joining others in the trenches 
to help pull you out. 

908
00:47:03,880 --> 00:47:08,720
Yeah, it's really beautiful. 
I really one of the best parts 

909
00:47:08,720 --> 00:47:14,680
of my job is seeing my clients 
complete a goal and seeing them 

910
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:17,800
whether it's in person or on 
telehealth and they have 

911
00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:20,680
accomplished their goal. 
Seeing that light in their eyes.

912
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:24,600
There's a spark that comes when 
they say I completed my goal, I 

913
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:26,840
did this, I did that. 
It's the most gratifying 

914
00:47:26,840 --> 00:47:29,960
feeling. 
So for me, my legacy, I just 

915
00:47:29,960 --> 00:47:36,360
want people to remember that I, 
I loved helping you in your 

916
00:47:36,360 --> 00:47:40,760
journey and you have helped me 
so much more than you'll ever 

917
00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:42,680
know. 
Just you being my client, you 

918
00:47:42,680 --> 00:47:45,880
have helped me in my journey. 
Are you accepting new patients? 

919
00:47:45,880 --> 00:47:48,000
I currently work in a private 
practice. 

920
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:51,560
It's not mine yet, but one day, 
one day I will open up my own 

921
00:47:51,560 --> 00:47:56,120
private practice and I am 
accepting new patients and it's 

922
00:47:56,120 --> 00:47:59,760
a group private practice. 
So I work with a bunch of 

923
00:47:59,760 --> 00:48:02,760
amazing therapists and we all 
work together and we see 

924
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:04,760
different clients. 
If someone want to get a hold of

925
00:48:04,760 --> 00:48:06,320
your office to make an 
appointment, how would they do 

926
00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:09,480
that? 
Psychologytoday.com you can 

927
00:48:09,480 --> 00:48:12,800
search my name, my name up 
there, send me an e-mail and I 

928
00:48:12,800 --> 00:48:16,160
will reply back to you as soon 
as possible, as soon as I get it

929
00:48:16,480 --> 00:48:18,680
and then you can schedule an 
appointment with me. 

930
00:48:19,160 --> 00:48:23,920
We have about a 1520 minute 
consultation where you'll get to

931
00:48:24,560 --> 00:48:28,680
kind of feel me out and you'll 
tell me what's going on and then

932
00:48:28,840 --> 00:48:32,960
you will decide if you vibe with
me because it's very important 

933
00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:38,120
that you feel a connection with 
me because part of your success 

934
00:48:38,120 --> 00:48:40,160
in therapy is going to be your 
relationship with your 

935
00:48:40,160 --> 00:48:44,680
therapist. 
So you have a consultation with 

936
00:48:44,680 --> 00:48:47,720
me and then if you choose to 
move forward, we start our 

937
00:48:47,720 --> 00:48:49,800
journey. 
And if not, I refer you to 

938
00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:52,480
somebody else who may can 
possibly help you. 

939
00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:54,720
And talk me through a couple of 
scenarios where you feel like 

940
00:48:54,720 --> 00:48:57,840
someone could use your services.
How they can? 

941
00:48:57,920 --> 00:49:00,120
How do you know that you that 
you need a therapist? 

942
00:49:00,120 --> 00:49:02,280
How do you know that they need 
to come see if you if I'm 

943
00:49:02,320 --> 00:49:05,280
listening to this episode and 
I'm I've been contemplating it, 

944
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:08,120
Do I need to see a therapist? 
Do I not talk me through how 

945
00:49:08,120 --> 00:49:11,640
somebody knows or or should know
to then go seek help? 

946
00:49:11,640 --> 00:49:14,320
I think that. 
My answer is like, if you can, 

947
00:49:14,320 --> 00:49:16,080
you should. 
Like all of us, all of us, 

948
00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:18,280
everybody needs a therapist. 
That's my answer, But you go 

949
00:49:18,280 --> 00:49:20,920
ahead. 
I think that once you feel like 

950
00:49:20,920 --> 00:49:25,800
you are stuck in your life and 
you feel like you have utilized 

951
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:31,040
every single tool out there to 
kind of push you forward and 

952
00:49:31,040 --> 00:49:33,760
you're still feeling stuck and 
you don't know where it's coming

953
00:49:33,760 --> 00:49:36,120
from. 
And you kind of want to explore 

954
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:38,840
and you want to talk about what 
happened in your past or your 

955
00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:41,920
present and you kind of want to 
unravel it and make sense out of

956
00:49:41,920 --> 00:49:44,840
it. 
Then you would contact me or any

957
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:49,280
type of therapist and tell them 
what is going on and to see if 

958
00:49:49,280 --> 00:49:53,000
we can help you if you've 
utilized every single thing and 

959
00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:55,640
you're still feeling like you 
can't. 

960
00:49:56,080 --> 00:49:57,760
Move forward. 
You don't have the right defense

961
00:49:57,760 --> 00:50:00,960
mechanisms or coping mechanisms.
OK, I love that. 

962
00:50:01,960 --> 00:50:04,960
Well, I will tell you, I'm sure 
that your mother up in the 

963
00:50:04,960 --> 00:50:07,000
heavens is very, very, very 
proud of you. 

964
00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:10,720
I have no trouble seeing exactly
why your dad is so proud of you.

965
00:50:10,720 --> 00:50:12,800
I think you are a breath of 
fresh air. 

966
00:50:12,800 --> 00:50:17,880
I am I will continue to be very 
impressed and still puzzled how 

967
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:23,480
you became this like wise, 
peaceful Zen sage and with I 

968
00:50:23,480 --> 00:50:26,080
mean, just with how where life 
took you and the crazy world 

969
00:50:26,080 --> 00:50:28,680
that we live in. 
But my gosh, are we grateful for

970
00:50:28,680 --> 00:50:29,600
you. 
Thank you. 

971
00:50:29,600 --> 00:50:31,680
Thank you so much for joining me
on Inside Thoughts Out Loud.