Theme in life, inevitably there will come times where you lose
momentum, where the optimism fades, where the confidence that
you once had in something, in your pursuit of something has it
has diminished. There'll be times when when you
in maybe it's like startup mode of a business, right?
Startup mode of a business fucking is so exciting.
There's so much opportunity. Or when you first start at the
gym, go on the health journey, it's exciting.
There's so much opportunity, there's so much fucking
possibility. It's like the first time you
make a sale. I remember the first time I made
a sale in my architectural business.
It was like I was just so exciting and the next to the
next to the next. The first time I made a sale in
The Awakened Man, like the first time you do these things, it's
so fucking exciting the first time.
Like you lose that first bit of weight or like something amazing
happens in your career when you've set yourself an objective
and then you're in momentum and you start building things.
It's just fucking powerful. It's like this, this, it's an
energy that we cultivate within ourselves, particularly in
business. It's like this, this, we call it
the the startup energy. Startup energy is exciting,
right? It's new.
We build that in ourselves. It's like, in fact, I think for
me personally, whenever this has happened in my life, I've been
very delusional like that. I haven't like had any like
these preconceived ideas about what I'm going to achieve or
when I'm going to achieve it or how I'm going to achieve it.
I've just been fucking in the zone and on it been very just
delusional and and that delusion that then led to forms of
success. Think about that for you guys,
like when you've had that in your life, when you, when you've
had that like that inner belief of possibility, that enthusiasm,
that intrinsic motivation that just makes you spring out of
bed, right? But then life happens.
Shit happens. That client that the that
amazing fucking client that loved you and you love them,
they then decide to leave you. That amazing client that you
loved and they loved you decides to fucking sue you because of a
project going wrong. The amazing fucking team member
that like the second person that came into your team that you
loved and you never thought would leave you, then leaves you
rejection online. When you get your first bit of
hatred or your first fucking troll, all the people or even
your family and your friends around you that you start to
question what you're doing. Maybe, maybe, maybe you get
disowned. Maybe there's like, what the
fuck? What's what's Luke?
I don't understand what Luke's doing.
I don't understand what Mike's doing.
Like what's going on here. Get pushed out of friends
circles, get pushed out of social circles.
People don't understand what's going on.
There's these like inevitable highs and lows.
We have all this start up high, this optimism, this possibility,
and then you get a punch in the gut and it is inevitable like
that. That wave of that high fucking
wave. You can't ride that for life.
I remember all these times when I've had these punches in the
gut when my amazing team members left me, or when a client wanted
to sue me, or when a client asked for a refund.
Oh fucking hell. It's all like it just doesn't go
your way. Think about that for your life.
Like when have you had that amazing optimism?
And then something is coming the way there's been this challenge,
this chaotic challenge that that you weren't expecting that's
come and punched you in the fucking gap and it hurts.
And then this fear comes in. Fuck, like what what if, like
what if I wasn't destined for all the success?
What if I like was a one trip pony?
What if like actually I don't really know what I'm fucking
talking about and I haven't got it all together And this like
those, all those clients that I was getting all that success I
was having in the gym or whatever that looks like
actually was just short term. Like this fear can kick in and
if you're not careful, that fear can fucking drive you.
That fear of judgement, the fear of failure or sometimes even the
the fear of actually being successful can, if you're not
careful, really keep you small and really keep you playing in
the lower fields, the lower leagues.
And it's a big thing. I've seen it in myself.
I see it in loads of guys seeing you guys listening in that we
ride this, we, we have these seasons of momentum and power,
fucking magic, the seasons of that.
And then there's the inevitable punch, There's the inevitable
blow. Something goes wrong doesn't
always go our way. And if we're not careful, it can
affect our belief system and install those fears in us that
then can keep us low because it's in those moments where it
truly, truly matters. Because in those moments, here's
the thing, it's like all of the pain and the low periods that I
have been through in growing my businesses, growing my life,
growing my career, they have absolutely shaped my character.
They have. They've given me the stories.
They've given me the stories I can look back on now and go
fuck. I learned so many lessons there
because I persevered. Without those growing pains, you
don't become the man you need to be.
Without the growing pains, you don't become the man you need to
be. It's hard when it fucking
happens the first time. Hard when it happens the 2nd,
3rd, 4th, and 5th. It doesn't get any fucking
easier, to be honest. Every level there is a new
devil. But here's the thing, the fear
of disappointment, it's like, fucking hell, I I was on this
great growth journey. Now I've had some punches in the
gut. Now I haven't got that intrinsic
motivation that I had once before, and I've probably got to
make some gutsy, ballsy move really to take it up to the next
level, to get it back or to go to the next stage.
I have to make gutsy moves, risky moves, bolder moves.
And there's this fear of disappointment, internal
disappointment that if you don't, if it doesn't fucking
work out, if you don't win, the only if you're a disappointment
to yourself, maybe other people around you.
But this fear of disappointment, this internal fear of
disappointment will absolutely cap your growth.
It will cap your income. It will cap your level of growth
in your relationships. It will cap the level of growth
that you have in your business and your careers and your lives.
This fear of disappointment, the disappointment in yourself will
fucking keep you so small. It's like, I know I know I
should release the new offer, or I know I should get on that big
podcast, or I know I should make the big the next career jump.
I know I should set up that business and I know I should
start the fucking side hobby, the side hustle.
I know I should start my business.
But what if it flops? Or if I start?
What if I start my business, my next new business, and then no
client buys? What if I really put myself out
there and I'm ridiculed? What if I get hate?
What if people make fun of me? The what if there will fuck you.
This is like so fucking important for your growth as men
that the resilience that you have in these moments when
you're down is what moulds you, is what sees you through.
Because in those lows that are inevitable, can you access the
delusion that you once had? Can you access the optimism and
the the possibility, the energy, the fucking magic that you once
had? Because that is the key.
Being able to hold that level of anticipation that something can
go wrong. Being able to hold the the
possibility of disappointment, being able to hold the chaos
internally. You being able to hold that
absolutely dictates your success.
With all the chaos that's around you, all the challenge that's
around you, you being able to hold that firmly as a man will
absolutely dictate how successful you are.
This is you building resilience as you go through the storm, the
seasons, the waves, the UPS and the downs because the successful
people, they can hold that they can handle the feeling of
disappointment. They can handle all the fears.
Can you handle the fear? Are you willing to be the man
that's going to put it all on the line?
Are you willing to be the man that's willing to put it on the
fucking line? Yesterday on the Awakened Man
call had a great conversation with Yazeen and this came up.
I've just got up on my phone here, this quote by Carl Young.
The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of its
parents. The greatest burden a child must
bear is the unlived life of its parents.
That fucking punched me straight in the gut.
And for me, it was like, dude, how much more am I willing to
put on the line here? To fucking go bigger to read, to
truly create that illogical, to go bigger and bigger and bigger.
How much am I willing to put on the line, especially as I have a
son? I don't want him to carry that
burden of, of me having a life where I've unlived it to my
potential. And here's and here's the thing.
And this, this is like a take away that I want you all to
consider is that your number one priority in life is to hold,
keep, accelerate your internal belief and your internal energy
that you have what it fucking takes.
And you are the one. The biggest thing for you to do
in life is to maintain and hold your belief that you are the one
fucking guard that shit. Guard that powerfully anyone
that tries to get in your way to, to limit the way you think,
to poison your environment with negativity.
Fucking call that. Get rid of that.
You have to guard your belief because it's very when you are,
when you go through the inevitable low times, it's easy
to be open to other people's fucking poison and other
people's way of pessimistic thinking.
You have to guard it. You have to put the boundaries
up. Fucking right back yourself.
Truly, truly back yourself. Be the man that that does make
the courageous moves, the brave moves even when the chips are
down because this is what it takes.
This is what it takes. This is not easy.
This is not all flow, sunshine, rainbows and unicorns.
And you guys would have seen this like the, the, the more
that you grow as men, the more that you cultivate bigger things
in your life, bigger businesses, more money, better things
happening. Actually, the more vulnerable
you are, the more vulnerable you you can feel.
I know for me, I fucking absolutely felt that the bigger
my businesses got, actually the more vulnerable I felt I had
big, I had more people to feed, there was more pressure on my
shoulders. Fuck it if I fell now, fuck it
now. Pizza flop.
He built that business and but another we couldn't be the next
failed in the end that you actually you become way more
vulnerable the bigger life that you lead.
But you have to hold that. You have to have the capability
and the resilience to hold that the openness to hold that
vulnerability. You got to be able to take
courageous moves even when you don't feel like it.
You have to be able to take courageous, bold fucking moves
even when you don't feel like it.
This is what it takes. When the chips are down, you
still got to move bolder, bolder, bolder, bigger, bigger,
bigger, more courageous. Every time you want to win at
life, you want to lead that illogical life, the bigger life.
This is exactly what it takes. It's who you are when it's hard,
when it's not easy to access. Access the confidence, the
certainty, the possibility, the optimism when it's not easy to
do that this is what this is, how it's fucking.
This defines you by being able to move even when it's not easy.
You need to make a conscious choice that even when it's hard,
you keep moving. This isn't The thing is, this
isn't a mindset trick. This has nothing to do with
mindset. This is a level of
consciousness. This is a belief.
A belief that you have what it takes and a belief that you are
the One. Like I said, your belief on
being the One is your number one priority to protect and to
maintain at all costs. This my friends, is how you keep
the magic going, the momentum going, the possibility going
even when the chip's down. Team, good to see you.
Talk to you again soon before you go.
We are a believer in the ripple effect.
So who do you think would benefit from this episode?
That you could send it to a mate or a group of mates, a family
member, a team colleague, the intern.
They would listen to it and then they would become better and
then the ripple effect would continue.
Who could you send it to?