1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,800 Hello and welcome back Debt Rebels. 2 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:07,040 This is the Debt Rebel show, and I am Jules the budget nerd. 3 00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:10,000 I'm so glad that you're here. We're in the middle of a little 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:14,120 series about just the most commonly asked ADHD and money 5 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:16,520 questions. And so the last few episodes 6 00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:20,040 we've talked about why our brains want to avoid our bank 7 00:00:20,040 --> 00:00:22,600 accounts. We talked about figuring out 8 00:00:22,600 --> 00:00:24,360 where our money is actually going. 9 00:00:24,360 --> 00:00:27,040 So maybe impulse spending some of those things. 10 00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:29,200 So if you haven't had a chance to listen, go back and check out 11 00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:33,200 those last few episodes. They're super helpful because if 12 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:37,040 you're like me and you're managing ADA symptoms as well as 13 00:00:37,040 --> 00:00:41,120 your personal finances, it can be a perfect storm and not in 14 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:44,360 the best way possible, right? This is the kind of stuff where 15 00:00:44,360 --> 00:00:47,960 our brains can be our own worst enemies, but we can help set 16 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:50,160 them up for success. And so today, we're going to be 17 00:00:50,160 --> 00:00:53,120 talking about staying consistent with our money even if we have 18 00:00:53,120 --> 00:00:56,960 to manage those ADHD symptoms. But before we jump in, I want to 19 00:00:56,960 --> 00:01:00,280 say a special thank you and hello to Carrie and Amanda. 20 00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:03,920 Thank you so much for joining my newsletter recently and just 21 00:01:03,920 --> 00:01:05,480 want to say thanks for listening. 22 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:08,160 And I am so part I'm so glad that you're a part of our 23 00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:11,200 community here staying consistent with our money 24 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:14,160 habits, right? This is the spot where we're 25 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:16,480 like, how do we do it? Because the only thing we can 26 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:19,480 stay consistent with is our inconsistency, right? 27 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:23,360 So we don't need to try and get more discipline. 28 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:26,720 What we need is a rhythm that works for our brain that we can 29 00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:29,520 rely on. So this is for that person. 30 00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:34,000 If this is you, you set up a budget and then and you're like, 31 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:36,920 I'm going to do this and then it falls apart. 32 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:40,120 Sometimes it's that same week, maybe you make it a couple of 33 00:01:40,120 --> 00:01:43,480 weeks, maybe you've made it a couple months before and then it 34 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:46,400 just doesn't work out. This episode is absolutely for 35 00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:50,360 you because I'm going to show you why consistency feels so 36 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:54,920 hard and what actually works instead of trying to push a rock 37 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:57,600 uphill like it feels like consistency can be sometimes. 38 00:01:57,600 --> 00:02:01,440 So let's think about this. So maybe you start out strong, 39 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:04,080 you've got that brand new budget and you've got some fresh 40 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:07,040 energy. Maybe you have a new app or 41 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:10,000 you've got a notebook, a planner that you're using to manage your 42 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,920 money. And it feels really good, right? 43 00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:14,520 This is the part where our brains get that dopamine and 44 00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:17,440 we're like, yes, we're doing this, we're tracking things, 45 00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:19,520 we're checking it. We're feeling like this is the 46 00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:22,240 moment, this is the time things are going to work out. 47 00:02:22,320 --> 00:02:25,840 And then life happens, which this is, this is a guarantee 48 00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:27,600 right now. And for anybody that's listening 49 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:29,000 to this, life is going to happen. 50 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:32,400 And so then maybe you missed a day, then a few days, and then 51 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:35,120 it feels like your system is completely falling apart and 52 00:02:35,120 --> 00:02:37,920 you're suddenly avoiding your bank account like you hadn't 53 00:02:37,920 --> 00:02:41,160 been in the past. And so we're going to change 54 00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:43,240 that today because you didn't forget. 55 00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:47,000 You just emotionally unsubscribe from that system. 56 00:02:47,120 --> 00:02:50,960 OK, so one of the things that I found myself getting into is 57 00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:54,640 that all or nothing cycle. And this is really, I see this a 58 00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:56,840 lot, especially in the ADHD world. 59 00:02:56,840 --> 00:02:59,200 I saw this a lot in myself before I was diagnosed. 60 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:02,280 I just didn't know that that's what was getting in my way. 61 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:06,440 And so we think that consistency has to be, we think consistency 62 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:09,120 means doing it perfectly. And you know, like I just said a 63 00:03:09,120 --> 00:03:11,360 little bit ago, the one thing that we're consistent with it, 64 00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:14,720 we're consistent with. And So what if we just change 65 00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:16,920 what consistency looked like in our minds? 66 00:03:17,760 --> 00:03:20,480 We don't have to do everything perfectly. 67 00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:22,600 Actually, I'd say we don't have to do anything perfectly. 68 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:25,840 That's not our job. But when we feel like we have to 69 00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:29,600 do things perfectly, that's when we complete we, that's when we 70 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:32,040 check out and that's when we quit the whole system. 71 00:03:32,040 --> 00:03:37,120 So that's not discipline, but that is turn out dressed up in a 72 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:42,320 cute planner or a cute a cute thing that is not going to allow 73 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:44,960 us to have the success that our brains crave. 74 00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:49,000 So one of the things too is that that motivation that we have is 75 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:52,280 based on feelings and emotions. And those things are very 76 00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:56,040 unreliable for us. So our brains love the novelty, 77 00:03:56,040 --> 00:03:58,840 they love the newness and not repetition. 78 00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:02,800 So when we use an old system like that, it sets us up for 79 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:05,760 failure and not because we're lazy, but because it requires us 80 00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:08,320 to feel motivated every day. So that's why inside our 81 00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:11,720 membership, we set up a system that manages itself in the 82 00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:14,000 background. So when we don't feel that 83 00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:17,320 motivation that it's still not going to allow us to go back 84 00:04:17,320 --> 00:04:19,920 into debt. It's going to help us keep 85 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:23,040 aligned with our goals. So if you're planned event, if 86 00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:26,120 you're depends on that motivation, it's already broken. 87 00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:30,800 OK, so how do we get consistent from our systems and not for 88 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:33,920 motivation? So consistent people are not 89 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:37,000 more disciplined. They just have more automation 90 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:40,320 set up and especially with our ADHD brains, having that 91 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,960 automation outside of our brains and having those things work in 92 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:48,200 the background is going to be much easier for us to handle. 93 00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:51,320 It's going to be much easiest for us to maintain and allow us 94 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:54,280 to be more consistent. So we don't have to decide every 95 00:04:54,280 --> 00:04:56,600 single day. We just follow a rhythm. 96 00:04:56,640 --> 00:05:00,640 So here's here's some things that can help us wrap our brains 97 00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:03,640 around this and that is to make it simple. 98 00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:07,000 So if we have to decide something every single day, 99 00:05:07,280 --> 00:05:10,560 that's relying on us having that same motivation, that same level 100 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:13,640 of energy every single day. And that's too much if we don't 101 00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:17,720 have a consistent plan. So if we just pick random days 102 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:20,760 or times to manage our money, then it's not going to happen, 103 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,640 right? Because our brains are craving 104 00:05:22,640 --> 00:05:26,080 that dopamine, that fun thing. So if we create a weekly rhythm, 105 00:05:26,160 --> 00:05:27,800 that's going to be more sustainable. 106 00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:29,600 And so it's not an everyday thing. 107 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:32,360 It's a once a week thing. And it doesn't have to be for a 108 00:05:32,360 --> 00:05:35,240 lot of time. So maybe it's Friday morning 109 00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:38,000 because that's payday is Friday. You check, make sure 110 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:41,880 everything's in there, or maybe you have another day or time 111 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:43,840 that works better for you, but make sure you're picking the 112 00:05:43,840 --> 00:05:47,760 same time, the same trigger so that that reduces the amount of 113 00:05:47,760 --> 00:05:50,800 decisions that you have to make. Now, we are not going to rise to 114 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:52,960 our goals, but we're going to fall to our systems. 115 00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:56,440 And that's why having a system set up for you and your brain 116 00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:59,280 and your family that works for you is going to make this 117 00:05:59,280 --> 00:06:01,320 process so much easier for yourself. 118 00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:06,040 So how do you build a simple rhythm that isn't overwhelming 119 00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:09,160 and that's doable, right? Because we've got a lot of other 120 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,240 things going on. We've got a lot of other systems 121 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:13,200 in our worlds that we need to maintain. 122 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:16,040 So how do we set up a money one that works for us? 123 00:06:16,360 --> 00:06:20,400 So one thing that was really helpful for me is realizing that 124 00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:26,080 it took, I didn't go from 0 to $107,000 in debt overnight. 125 00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:30,320 And so getting away from that, getting out from underneath that 126 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:33,080 and reducing that is not going to happen overnight either. 127 00:06:33,080 --> 00:06:37,200 So we're not trying to rebuild your entire financial life today 128 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,480 in this one episode. It's a whole system. 129 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:42,320 And so we're going to pick 1 anchor habit. 130 00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:46,920 So pick one thing, one habit to help get you closer to that 131 00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:50,440 financial life that you crave. So an example is having that 132 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:53,720 weekly check in, maybe meal planning in the grocery budget 133 00:06:53,720 --> 00:06:56,920 is way out of control. So I know that's a lot for a lot 134 00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:59,680 of my families that I work with. That's one area because if you 135 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:03,520 think about it, after your mortgage and after, you know, 136 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:06,960 paying for housing and things like that, your meals, those are 137 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:09,800 the food for your family that's going to, that's going to be one 138 00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:11,800 of your biggest reoccurring expenses. 139 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:15,080 So I've created the grocery reset playbook to help you with 140 00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:17,120 that. But one thing that you can do 141 00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:20,560 right now to create that habit is the meal planning before 142 00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:22,880 grocery shopping. So if meal planning is a 143 00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:25,120 challenge for you, there's an added bonus in that grocery 144 00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:27,640 reset playbook as well. That's going to help you. 145 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:30,080 Some amazing feedback about that is like having. 146 00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:33,280 So a friend of mine that grabbed it, she said this is stuff my 147 00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:36,160 son will actually eat and this makes grocery shopping so much 148 00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:38,880 easier. So helping you reduce the 149 00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:43,480 decision fatigue and allowing your family to continue to eat 150 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,760 healthy foods that they'll actually eat. 151 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,840 That's available too. So maybe it is reviewing your 152 00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:50,880 upcoming bills. That's the one habit that you're 153 00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:53,600 going to start today and see, hey, I have the money in my 154 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:56,320 account to do that or my upcoming paycheck is going to 155 00:07:56,320 --> 00:07:58,120 cover that. Maybe you're trying to grow your 156 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:00,000 savings. So transferring some money to 157 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:03,880 savings on that, that date and time that you have set up, 158 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:06,280 that's another place so you can put some automation in. 159 00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:08,840 And that's also helped us grow our savings and our emergency 160 00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:10,720 fund. So the thing that makes this 161 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:14,200 successful is it's predictable. So our brains know it's coming. 162 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:17,360 We know when it's coming and we can, we can file that away. 163 00:08:17,440 --> 00:08:19,640 It's also small. So that means that there's going 164 00:08:19,640 --> 00:08:22,920 to be less resistance and less hesitation to follow through 165 00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:25,800 with these tasks because, or follow through with this habit 166 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:30,240 because it's small, right? We can do small things, but when 167 00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:33,320 we start to think about overhauling our entire financial 168 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:36,320 life, we're like, that's way, way too much. 169 00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:39,200 And so we don't do it. But if we pick One Financial 170 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:42,520 habit that we can start today, that is going to help create 171 00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:45,720 that consistency for yourself. And then we want this to be 172 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:47,920 repeatable. And so that's where that trust 173 00:08:47,920 --> 00:08:50,480 gets built with yourself is because our brains want to lie 174 00:08:50,480 --> 00:08:52,960 to us and tell us that we're not good at this. 175 00:08:53,360 --> 00:08:55,280 And that that's part of the ADHD talking. 176 00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:58,680 And so I want to encourage you today that when you create this 177 00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:02,960 is, is keep it, keep it going. And that's going to build that 178 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,440 trust with yourself. Again, that says, hey, I can do 179 00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:09,240 this, I can do things, I can do this, I can do this often, I can 180 00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:11,240 do this when I've scheduled that time with myself. 181 00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:15,360 So consistency isn't about doing more, it's about doing less more 182 00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:17,560 often. So it's just, you know, have you 183 00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:20,080 heard that saying, how do you eat an elephant one bite at a 184 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:21,920 time? That's what this is, is we're 185 00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:24,880 just going to eat that elephant, that financial, creating that 186 00:09:24,880 --> 00:09:27,640 financial system, but we're going to do 1 habit right now. 187 00:09:28,680 --> 00:09:31,160 We're going to make that goal. The action step for this week's 188 00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:34,840 episode is just to choose that one weekly money habit. 189 00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:37,440 Pick a day, pick the time, and that's it. 190 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:39,200 We're not going to add five other things. 191 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:41,440 We're not going to overthink it. We're going to pick one thing. 192 00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:44,080 So as you're listening to my voice right now, I want you to 193 00:09:44,080 --> 00:09:48,000 grab your phone, set a timer right now before you forget, put 194 00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:50,760 it on your calendar. For us, we schedule this on our 195 00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:53,360 calendars because for me, if it's not on my calendar, it 196 00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:55,320 doesn't get done. That's part about creating an 197 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:59,120 outside my external brain because I can't rely my memory 198 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:02,120 to keep those things. So I have that written down or 199 00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:03,520 scheduled in my calendar, I should say. 200 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:07,720 So here's the truth though. Consistency is a lot easier when 201 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:10,960 we're not doing it alone. So that's why I've created the 202 00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:14,000 alliance coaching membership just the way that I have because 203 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:17,680 it allows us to focus in on these simple real life systems 204 00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:20,960 that fit our real life rhythms and actually have some 205 00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:24,440 accountability because knowing what to do isn't necessarily the 206 00:10:24,440 --> 00:10:26,080 problem. It's sticking with it. 207 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:28,440 So if consistency is one of those areas that you're like, 208 00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:31,760 hey, I need some extra help in, I would love to help you with 209 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:33,800 that. So if you're tired of starting 210 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:37,520 over every single month, the alliance is always, always open 211 00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:39,160 for you. I'll have the information in the 212 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:41,440 show notes for you and we'll walk through this together. 213 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:43,840 Thank you so much for joining me today. 214 00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:47,600 I hope that this episode was helpful and you can find more 215 00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:51,480 information on my website as well, debt rebelpodcast.com. 216 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:54,280 You can find out more about the alliance there and any other 217 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:57,040 resources that you would like. All right, we'll see you in the 218 00:10:57,040 --> 00:10:58,560 next episode. Thank you for. 219 00:10:58,560 --> 00:11:00,640 Tuning into the debt. Rebel show today. 220 00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:03,880 Ready to take your family budgeting to the next level? 221 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:08,080 Stop that paycheck to paycheck grind and start living debt. 222 00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:11,840 Free head over. To my website Debt Rebel podcast 223 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:16,720 dot com that's DEBTRE. DEL. 224 00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:20,480 Podcast.com. To grab resources, tools. 225 00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:23,160 And tips to make it happen. And don't forget. 226 00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:26,280 Subscribe. Leave a review and if you know 227 00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:29,160 another family that will love hearing today's episode. 228 00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,960 It would be such. A gift for both of us, your 229 00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:36,240 friend and me if you share this episode and remember your debt 230 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:39,520 free life starts with one brave step and I'm cheering you on 231 00:11:39,560 --> 00:11:41,480 every step of the way. We'll talk soon. 232 00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:41,960 Debt Rebel.