All right, so if checking your bank account feels stressful,
your brain is trying to protect you.
So today, some of the things that we do when we avoid our
bank account, there is an absolute valid reason that our
brains don't want us to go there.
So we're going to talk about that in a second, but I wanted
to welcome Nikki and Teresa. Thank you so much for listening
to the show and downloading the free resources available on my
website, debtrebelpodcast.com. Thanks for joining us.
All right, if you so avoiding our bank accounts, right, So
that notification will pop up on our phone and we just quickly
swipe it away instead of opening it because we're like doom and
dread could be on the other side, but we don't know until we
open it, right? So let me tell you why our brain
specifically want to avoid this. And it's not because we're lazy.
It's because our brains are trying to protect us.
It is like our brain self protection mode.
So it's because at least in my experience, it might be in the
same experience for you. But let's let's talk through
this because some of the things that I experienced when I was
trying, when I kept avoiding looking at that information,
whether it was the amount of debt we had or bank account
balance, or maybe it was some of my expenses.
Those types of things brought up a lot of shame and guilt for me
and for myself because I had all of this head knowledge.
I had a degree, I had all of this head knowledge on what to
do with my money, but I couldn't get my brain to do the thing and
just quote UN quote, try harder, which I think is some of the
most, really, it's the most discouraging when it comes to
managing your money. And if you have ADHD, it is it
is just like the thing that shut me down.
And so one of the things is that that shame and guilt, it is tied
to our relationship with money. We can feel overwhelmed by not
knowing what our numbers are or what they mean.
And so that's what the show is about, is to help you move
through some of that stuff. I'm not going to be able to take
it all away. I absolutely wish that that was
something that I could do for you.
But I'm going to come alongside you and walk with you through
this process because the things that I have learned have been
really helpful. And if you're brand new to the
show, a little bit about me. I got a degree in economics.
My husband and I got into $107,000 in consumer debt, paid
it off, and then started teaching others how to do this
as well. And then within the last year
was diagnosed with ADHD and realized so many of the things
that I struggled with were because of my ADHD and my
undiagnosed ADHD. And I wanted to create something
and share what I have learned with more people.
Because those two and money management seem like oil and
water sometimes. And it is not all about just
knowing everything and being able to apply it, setting up a
system that works for you. So that's what I love teaching
on this podcast, but I also love teaching that inside my
membership. So one of the things about the
overwhelm is just thinking about how how big some of those
numbers could be and how we don't know what they look like.
And that was something for me when we were going through our
debt elimination process was what are our numbers even look
like? Because they felt really, really
big and I didn't know until I actually looked at them.
So the next piece is just checking it is not the most
helpful advice, right? And so we can, we can say that
we can tell other people that it's really easy for me to just
say, hey, just check your numbers, right?
And I know I've said that in the past and as I have learned
personal finances that it is so personal.
And so we are a different person every single time we hear
something and we're in a different spot than we were the
last time. So if something you've tried
something in the past and it hasn't worked and it's been some
time, maybe you're in a different spot and you can and
you can try something. And so just checking it, you
could do that. That is an option, but one of
the things that I have found is I just set aside some time once
a week to look at my stuff. Right before I got on this
episode, I looked over our family budget and made sure our
spending was on track for this month.
And you can see things as they come.
And so for me, that was really helpful.
And it's not a just check it kind of thing.
It's I had my system set up so that that didn't take a lot of
time. So if the executive function
part of you was saying, hey, I don't, I don't want to do this
because it can feel like an overwhelming task sometimes just
breaking it down and just doing 1 little bit at a time is really
helpful. So you might also be listening
to this and you have no idea, maybe you don't have access to
your bank account on your phone, or maybe you don't want access
to it on your phone. Maybe you need to jump on your
computer and do it that way. What works for you is what is
most important. So this is not a
one-size-fits-all kind of recommendation or ideas.
That's what that's what I say. You know, personal finance is so
very personal and so figuring out what works best for you.
But one thing that I have noticed for myself is I would
avoid it because I didn't want to face it.
And that is that's our brains in that self protection mode.
And so one thing that we do inside the membership is you
don't have to face those things alone.
So it is a judgement free space where you can actually look at
your money. And we don't necessarily have to
like share screenshots or anything like that, but it is a
place where you can ask questions.
You can say, hey, does this sound right?
Does this look right? I'm struggling with this area.
And we can talk through those things because one thing that
I'm passionate about is creating something that I didn't have
when I was going through my personal finance journey to
become debt free, to get things organized and figure out a
system that worked for my family and I.
So I highly recommend too, if you want to this system that I,
that I put into place and that has worked for our family has
been really great because there was a whole month I didn't make
a budget and we didn't go back into debt.
And the ironic part about that is this is what I was teaching
at the time. So this has happened within the
last couple of years since I started this podcast.
I believe it's episode 38 and you can go back and you can
listen to that. You know, the time I forgot to
make a budget. I'm a money coach.
This is what I teach and I forgot to make a budget.
And so The thing is, is creating a system for yourself that is
going to work for you and your family so that you don't have to
continue to go to the credit cards to pay for day-to-day
life. So today's action is to pick a
10 minute money date with yourself sometime this week.
I always like to put it with something else that I enjoy so
that it's something I can look forward to.
And then you know what, set a timer for 10 minutes.
When that timer goes off, you're done if you want to continue on
and after that timer goes all right, so after that 10 minute
timer goes off, you're done. You can stick around and work on
it somewhere if you want to, but otherwise, once that timer goes
off, you're done. And so, so if you're looking for
some additional support, so set that 10 minute timer, when that
timer goes off, you're done with your money date for that week.
So I'd love to hear when you set your date and what you
accomplished in that 10 minutes. So you can go to my website,
debtrebelpodcast.com and there's a spot there that you can leave
me a voice note. I would just love it if you
would share some of that info with me that we could share with
other listeners to this podcast and just encourage each other in
that way that it just doesn't have to be a huge, a huge task.
We can eat an elephant one bite at a time.
And this is how we do it is we just pick 10 minutes and we work
on our money. Sometimes that is opening up
that app or jumping on our computer and seeing what our
balances are. Maybe it is like we talked about
in the previous episode, setting up one bill on auto pay so that
you don't have to worry about late fees in the future.
So I hope that this was an encouraging episode for you.
And again, if you have other questions, I love answering
listener requested questions. So you can go to
debtrebelpodcast.com and submit your question there.
Send me a voice note. I love to hear your voice and
what is on your mind. So we'll see you in the next
episode. Thanks for joining me.