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I'm Michael Che and I'm Colin 
Jose, and we've got a little 

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secret. 
Actually, it's a pretty big 

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secret. 
Well, now you got to give the 

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people something. 
I'm not saying a word. 

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Oh, then people will know to 
tune in. 

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Come on, tell them a little. 
Like our hosting of comedy 

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events streaming only on 
Peacock. 

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Exactly how it's called New York
After Dark. 

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And it's a comedy show that only
features drop in comic. 

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Boom. 
You nail into Michael Che's 

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phone. 
Nervous. 

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Whoa, whoa, whoa. 
Hey, hey, hey. 

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New York After Dark. 
It's some kind of comedy thing. 

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And it's streaming now only on 
Peacock. 

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You love it. 
Zippers, welcome to this episode

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00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:42,960
of the Tea with Me podcast. 
With me, she and Todd, the crack

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was good. 
We're feeling good here. 

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We've got some made some tea. 
We're having a good time. 

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We're sponsored before we get in
there. 

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Anything we're sponsored by 
Thompson's Tea. 

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Look, these guys have been knock
on about the local tea game for 

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a long time. 
They've seen all these companies

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come and go and they've they've 
continued to be Northern 

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Ireland's number one selling 
tea. 

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Yes. 
And it's very lucrative, 

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violent, it's complex. 
It's it can get, you know, you 

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can get in the Muddy Waters with
it. 

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But but of course there's local 
tea game. 

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But just like Nambari. 
They're like the big Nambari 

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family. 
Yeah, this is the Punjana. 

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Family. 
It's like The Sopranos, Yeah, 

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but not really in any way. 
They're just fucking tea bags at

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each other from across the road.
But well, the number now, Barry 

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wouldn't you wouldn't go very 
far because the the the leaves 

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aren't good, but you could fuck 
you could honestly. 

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And Thompson family won't mind 
me saying this. 

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You could fuck a bag of Punjana 
a mile and a half, I would say, 

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because it's just the best tea, 
you guys you could. 

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These guys were making tea since
the 1800s, all right? 

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They know tea like the back of 
their hand. 

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Me and Don have visited their 
facility in East Belfast, which 

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was great. 
We've seen. 

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Sucker on the bottom of your 
shoe? 

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Sorry, but you do. 
I know it's it's the price of 

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the shoes I'm not taking off. 
It just says the size does it. 

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Yeah, yeah, it's a barcode. 
Yeah, I could get that app right

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and scan it. 
You can, yeah. 

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But continue with your tea. 
Let me see the bottom of your 

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shoes then. 
Oh, you've been mugged. 

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What do you? 
Mean it's just a post it. 

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We also like last night we did 
the live podcast and I had a bit

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of confetti at the bottom of my 
shoe and it was on just to walk 

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on stage and then a guy pointed 
it like to me that was doing 

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sound and then I held my shoe up
to look at it, but he thought I 

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was holding it up to me. 
Take it off now. 

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And he did it and I was like, 
oh, I'm so sorry. 

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Were we that you had confetti on
your shake? 

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At the Limelight didn't live. 
No, but was there confetti at 

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the gig? 
There was confetti at the gig 

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before team. 
I have to do these reads, sorry.

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I. 
Have to do these reads. 

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I have to, otherwise we're out 
in the streets #1 Northern 

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Ireland's number one selling tea
pajana. 

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Best in the game Belfast made. 
Keep drinking it, we appreciate 

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them. 
Is that what I'm sponsor? 

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That's what you're drinking. 
Now we can talk about the 

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debacle we have making this tea 
in a second. 

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We are also sponsored by 
manscaped Manscaped. 

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Look, I don't know what way 
you're taking care of your 

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pubes. 
I don't know if you're, you 

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know, still using outdated 
methods. 

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I don't know if you're running 
about, you know, tighten on your

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pubes, the paramilitaries to try
and get them to kick them out. 

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Don't do you don't need to 
intimidate your pubes out. 

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What you need to do is go to 
manscape.com. 

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They have the best immense below
the belt groom and they've got 

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the lawnmower 4 point O they've 
got an yeah, We talked about it 

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last week in the podcast and I 
said I need to I need to start 

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getting higher my own supply and
I still haven't yet. 

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I still. 
Haven't manscaped. 

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Not in like I need to not it's 
not here's here's how I describe

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it. 
It's a little bit like like as a

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guy when you get a haircut and 
then it grows out a bit. 

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It's not that bad, but like it's
over your ears just a wee bit. 

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You still need. 
You still need to take care of. 

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It there. 
Was a girl, you know, I know 

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we've just had International 
Women's Day, but shut up. 

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Use the code tea with me, 20% 
off and free shipping. 

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They've got it all. 
They've got it all. 

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So they've been sponsoring us 
for a long time. 

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We appreciate it. 
The code is in the bio, the 

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description. 
Last thing, go to 

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00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:39,000
plugpatreon.com where we do the 
live stream episodes, We do 

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00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,600
bonus episodes and all that good
stuff. 

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And then also, I'm going to be 
in America. 

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Don, is that this week? 
Oh. 

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My fucking God. 
Is that this week you need it 

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might be triple. 
Adapter for all these plugs. 

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What? 
Fuck me. 

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Chicago, no. 
Boston, 22nd of March, 

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Washington 23rd, and then New 
York, 24th and two shows in the 

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26th. 
Yeah, the 23rd is today. 

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Yesterday I was in Boston. 
Come to that. 

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Today I'm in Washington, DC 
Tomorrow I'm in New York and 

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then two shows in Woodlawn, 
which is in the Bronx. 

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We'll put the description in 
there. 

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My guest today is Deona 
Haggerty. 

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No, this is a weird subject 
because you were dealing with 

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Doherty, and at a gig we did 
recently you got introduced as 

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dealing with Doherty. 
Yeah. 

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Are you happy with either? 
If I'm earning money, it's Dory.

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If I'm ringing a Chinese, it's 
Haggerty, right? 

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Or the doctors or something. 
Yeah. 

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I never, I never do. 
It was whenever I got married, I

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asked my agent at the time 
should I change my work name as 

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well to Haggerty. 
And then she was old. 

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Nah. 
Sound shake. 

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Yeah, she was all just 
alliteration with the D and the 

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D and also just IMDb had Doherty
and she's a lot of shit. 

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I can be arsed. 
You've got the D and the D and 

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IMDb. 
On the IMDb, my whole family's 

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DD right? 
What are the Kardashians? 

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A dairy. 
Yes, so like all the Kardashians

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are like Chloe, Kourtney, 
Kendall. 

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I knew more than I thought 
there, Kim, what are what are 

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who is in your family? 
D Donna Darn Diona Doherty from 

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Derry. 
So by the way, is your dad? 

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Well, no, that's an help. 
But is your dad just D? 

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Everybody in dairy is called D 
What? 

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Everyone in dairy is called D 
Doherty. 

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Literally everybody in dairy is 
called. 

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D if you're not called D EE, D 
EE. 

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Yeah, so like genuinely, if you,
if you speak to smells from 

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dairy and they're all watching 
Daddy Dory and everyone's I fuck

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which one? 
There's a thousand of them, 

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right? 
D Doherty's in dairy. 

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There was about 6 and my 
brother's year in school. 

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Right now, were you tempted when
your agent we talked about 

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changing your name, were you 
tempted that as a stage name 

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change your first name you're 
happy with that I. 

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Like my first. 
Name you like Diona? 

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Because my mom and dad made it 
up. 

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Because my dad's called Dave, my
mom was called Dawn, and they 

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put them together and got Diona.
Oh, no. 

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My dad's called Dennis. 
Mom's called Susan. 

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It would have been Dusan. 
Yeah. 

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Or Senis Senis. 
Susan's better. 

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Will. 
I look like I look like I could 

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be from Poland and called Susan.
That's perfect, yeah. 

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And it's also because you have 
quite an A draw, an andragonist 

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lockaboochi. 
Pardon. 

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Is that all right for me to say?
I mean, I'm offended by that, 

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but also I don't know what the 
word means and. 

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Dragonist, you know you're not 
sure if you're a boy. 

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No, I don't mean for that to be 
offensive. 00 and in in a fun 

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way. 
Do you know like? 

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You're saying if you saw me on 
the broil of the hill from a 

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distance, you'd have to. 
You'd have to really think about

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it. 
Who's on the broil of the whole 

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year, eh? 
What? 

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Did you say if I saw you from a 
hill? 

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Yeah, on the brow of a hill. 
You're on the hill or am I on 

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the hill? 
Because that affects my vision. 

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Right, I'm on the brow of the 
hill. 

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I no, so I know you're a boy. 
There was a there was a wee. 

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There was a wee boy in my school
and my private. 

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Don't change the subject. 
Why did you describe me as 

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androgynous and said it's hard 
to tell if I'm a boy or a girl? 

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No, no. 
I don't think it's hard to tell 

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if do you know what androgynous 
means? 

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No, no, it's like you're not 
particularly really masculine, 

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nor are you very feminine. 
You're just in the middle. 

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What are you trying to say right
now? 

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Because what about me isn't 
masculine? 

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I'm wearing a pink T-shirt. 
I got my legs crossed. 

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We gigged recently at an 
International Women's Day event,

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and everybody on the lineup, 
everybody in the lineup, like 

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all of the events throughout the
day, was a woman. 

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Everybody in the audience was a 
woman. 

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The fucking host was a woman and
you were the entertainment. 

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Yeah, I, I still, that was a 
weird one. 

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I like because I was booked to 
do stand up at it. 

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I knew it was for International 
Women's Day, but I thought it 

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was like there was loads of 
comedians on and I was just 

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wondering, I thought maybe I'm 
the token guy. 

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00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:00,840
Yeah, but it turns out no. 
I you were just the. 

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Guy, they think women's comedy 
in Northern Ireland, they go 

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00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:08,680
get, get, get, get decent, yeah.
Get decent and she's great. 

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00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:10,840
Here I've let's talk about that 
game. 

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00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:13,720
I've never felt more comfortable
on stage. 

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00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:15,800
There were 300 middle-aged 
women. 

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00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:18,800
It was just fat. 
I loved everything. 

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00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:21,240
And also, you told them it was 
fab, quite a lot. 

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00:09:21,240 --> 00:09:25,120
You were like girls, we're just 
having a great day, aren't we? 

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00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:27,560
Yeah, I really had to check the 
vibe on it because I was like, 

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00:09:27,560 --> 00:09:29,800
do they like like the cheek 
because I was leaning into so 

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00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:32,400
much like OK, I'm a guy here, 
it's all women. 

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00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:33,760
This is lovely. 
This is beautiful. 

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00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:37,600
I've very nearly started the set
by saying girls don't worry. 

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00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:39,920
I've talked it all in between my
legs for this. 

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00:09:40,560 --> 00:09:42,840
But then I kind I kind of felt 
like a new little animals, but I

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00:09:42,840 --> 00:09:44,320
think as. 
Soon as you got on stage, they 

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00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:46,160
went. 
There's quite an andragonist 

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00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:52,520
looking being we're cool with 
this guy, gal, whatever's 

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00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:54,080
happening. 
Androgynous be. 

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00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:56,400
I don't even think you're saying
it right and that's annoying me 

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00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:57,600
more. 
I'm not sure if it's an 

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00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:01,520
androgynous or androgynous. 
Depends where you're from. 

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00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:04,040
I I think it's my accent. 
Yeah. 

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00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:08,000
It's making me say the hard GII.
Mean I don't know. 

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00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:10,800
I don't know if I because I 
think I I do. 

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00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:14,840
I am quite masculine I think 
because I'm so camp that means 

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00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:18,760
that comes from circle and I'm 
asking like I could honestly I 

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00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:22,520
could. 
I think I could wank a guy off 

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00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:26,000
and not feel anything. 
Multiple guys. 

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00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:29,960
Well, wanking a guy off is the 
most masculine thing you could 

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00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:31,200
do. 
Like, yeah, do you know what I 

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00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:33,600
mean? 
Because yeah, like everything 

219
00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:35,440
involved there is is to do with 
a man. 

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00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,920
And it's, it's put, you know, 
pulling, pushing. 

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00:10:37,920 --> 00:10:39,480
It's at manual labour as well, 
so. 

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00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:42,120
There was a wee boy in my 
primary class and I know I know 

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00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:49,360
he was a wee boy and he went to 
I used to ask him and this 

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00:10:49,360 --> 00:10:51,640
sounds horrible. 
I used to always go to him and 

225
00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:55,240
go what are you because he'd 
curly hair and he'd use me 

226
00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:58,320
glasses and I did not. 
I even know I'm confused. 

227
00:10:58,320 --> 00:10:59,600
I didn't know if he was a girl 
or a boy. 

228
00:10:59,640 --> 00:11:01,320
You should be posthumously 
cancelled. 

229
00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:04,320
Like if I knew what posthumously
meant. 

230
00:11:04,680 --> 00:11:06,440
So you used a big word, and I am
what? 

231
00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:07,040
Mike? 
What? 

232
00:11:09,240 --> 00:11:11,000
Oh, yeah. 
Oh, yeah. 

233
00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:12,680
Possibly. 
Have you died? 

234
00:11:12,680 --> 00:11:14,640
I thought it meant, like, back 
and belatedly. 

235
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,200
You should be, Belatedly. 
To be dead, To be posthumously. 

236
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:20,960
Posthumously, that's what that's
the, that's what that he said, 

237
00:11:21,040 --> 00:11:24,160
He's Ledger got a an Oscar 
posthumously. 

238
00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:27,800
But he didn't get cancelled. 
But well, in a way, he did 

239
00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:31,400
Cancel from life, Delete. 
He's cancelled from the movies. 

240
00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:35,080
See ya and I still always go for
this be like what are you 

241
00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,920
actually? 
And he thought I was joking so 

242
00:11:37,920 --> 00:11:41,520
he would be all leave me alone 
and I'm like just tell me what 

243
00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,120
you are. 
This is a horrific tale of 

244
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,880
bullying, he said. 
Just leave me alone. 

245
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:49,600
But I didn't know what he no 
thinking back waynes or decks. 

246
00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:52,480
Aren't they like kids are real 
awful bastards, me included, 

247
00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,800
probably because I used because 
I just just did. 

248
00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,120
I just wanted to know what he 
was, because if you just fucking

249
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,000
answer the question. 
But why does he have to be? 

250
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:00,880
It's like me, why do I have to 
be in a box? 

251
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:04,200
There's a box and it says 
androgynous on it and I'm in 

252
00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:06,800
there with that kid. 
Just crying. 

253
00:12:07,680 --> 00:12:11,000
I don't know I am. 
He probably told me every day 

254
00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:13,640
I'm a boy and I was like. 
See, I used to look more like a 

255
00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:16,320
boy because I used to. 
I used to have a shaved head up 

256
00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:20,120
until I was like 1516 or just 
the 2 all over. 

257
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:21,480
And I used to just wear 
football. 

258
00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:23,160
Why? 
Is that was that for sure 

259
00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:26,400
whenever we were that age was 
not all like blonde tips and all

260
00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:27,760
run like. 
No, that's. 

261
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:29,560
And like, do you remember like 
the what? 

262
00:12:29,640 --> 00:12:30,760
The Fleck, the front of your 
hair. 

263
00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:33,960
Yeah, I have that. 
Well, I used that George words. 

264
00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:36,800
I used to have the Fleck but 
also the shaved head. 

265
00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:41,080
Yeah, a Lone Ranger flick, Rogue
flick, and then the rest. 

266
00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:45,400
He was bought. 
Yeah, at one point I I was like 

267
00:12:45,680 --> 00:12:48,600
got when I was like probably 
about 12:13. 

268
00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:52,640
I thought why, why do more girls
not like fancy me or anything? 

269
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:55,720
So I thought I know let me dye 
this just just the fringe bit 

270
00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:58,720
peroxide blonde and just have my
weird chipped. 

271
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:02,160
Also have a weird chipped head 
and that combo did not work. 

272
00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:05,840
I mean, how did that you were 
saying trying to win gold, 

273
00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:09,920
fellows the. 
Frosted No, I'm saying I would 

274
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:13,440
posthumously do that. 
The the weird, that weird 

275
00:13:13,440 --> 00:13:18,360
frosted tip look, that was in 
hindsight one of the looks that 

276
00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:22,720
at the time guys thought was 
myself included, thought was the

277
00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:24,880
best. 
But that was looking back on it,

278
00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:29,480
the shittest look and what it 
was is you would have like a lot

279
00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:34,600
of a fringe combed over spike 
the middle and back of your 

280
00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,280
hair. 
Yes, and then you had a bits 

281
00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:39,680
coming down like the back. 
That was the shittest 

282
00:13:39,680 --> 00:13:41,200
disgusting. 
It was so bad. 

283
00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,480
And I used to have like a gel 
that was coloured. 

284
00:13:43,480 --> 00:13:46,160
It was like a red, So you'd put 
a bit of red or you might do 

285
00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:48,400
like a Mohawk bit in the middle.
That was fucking. 

286
00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:49,480
That was such a bad. 
I got a. 

287
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:54,760
Perm when I was 12 right? 
Like a full, full fucking Irish 

288
00:13:54,760 --> 00:13:57,640
dancing head locking perm right 
and. 

289
00:13:57,840 --> 00:14:02,120
I-16. 12/12 it was 12 like who's
letting their kids get a permit?

290
00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:05,600
12 and I and it was the most 
potent shit as well. 

291
00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:08,040
Like it's not now. 
Like it was like my head was 

292
00:14:08,040 --> 00:14:10,760
stinging like fuck. 
And it was like as never 

293
00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:14,760
inherited for about 3 days 
trying to get it done and I went

294
00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:17,600
under school all best. 
I lived out in the country. 

295
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:19,440
So over the summer I didn't see 
anybody. 

296
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,320
So I was like, I'm going to go 
back to school with my parent, 

297
00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:23,560
be like, so cool. 
Yeah, right. 

298
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:26,640
And I went under my school. 
My mom dropped me off, drove the

299
00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:29,960
40 minutes back to where we 
lived and I came under school 

300
00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:33,680
with my parent and I. 
We hair band on and went up to 

301
00:14:33,680 --> 00:14:35,440
the like reception. 
I was like, can you let me know 

302
00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:37,960
which class to go to? 
Because you get like a new form 

303
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,560
class when you go on. 
And she was like, what are you 

304
00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:41,040
talking about? 
You don't start till next week. 

305
00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:43,160
They were in doing admin. 
Shit eyes. 

306
00:14:43,160 --> 00:14:45,920
I'm there in my uniform and my 
pair just crying in the foyer. 

307
00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:48,120
The kid with the perm would want
to come in a week early. 

308
00:14:48,640 --> 00:14:50,680
Actually, I think the early bird
catches the worm. 

309
00:14:50,920 --> 00:14:53,160
You know the perm? 
You live 40 minutes away from 

310
00:14:53,160 --> 00:14:53,920
school? 
Yeah. 

311
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,560
Was there no schools closer? 
You just what there was. 

312
00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:59,080
It was the best goal. 
It was a grammar school. 

313
00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:00,680
Right. 
It's the school. 

314
00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:03,320
There he goes a set about. 
Oh, OK. 

315
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:09,480
It's the grammar school, so. 
I lived potentially a nought .4 

316
00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:13,280
mile drive from my school and 
every single day got a lift. 

317
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:17,360
Isn't that shit like? 
That's, that's that is absolute 

318
00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:19,760
privilege. 
Yeah, like, disgusting. 

319
00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:20,520
Yeah. 
Why didn't you? 

320
00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:22,800
Why wouldn't you walked? 
Kids love walking to school 

321
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,880
because you can go out and have 
a cubby sneaky fag or something.

322
00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:27,480
Yeah, well, I wasn't going to. 
I wasn't going to do that. 

323
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:29,520
No, no, I don't. 
I don't know. 

324
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:31,960
I I I would have hated a long 
journey to school. 

325
00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:35,200
I It was brutal, but then I 
could do my homework in the car 

326
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,000
and also that's how I got 
smarter because my dad would ask

327
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:40,440
me questions the whole way. 
He'd make me like, do maths and 

328
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,280
some. 
Sounds like the shittest drive. 

329
00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:45,880
40 minutes of your dad like. 
Making me spell words. 

330
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:48,840
Your dad like like like an 
episode of Countdown. 

331
00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:51,960
And also my brother was still is
2 years older than me. 

332
00:15:51,960 --> 00:15:57,040
He's always going to be until 
he's posthumously fucking dead. 

333
00:15:57,520 --> 00:16:00,040
He's two years old. 
He'll still be two years older 

334
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:03,120
than you when he's. 
Dead and he we both used to sit 

335
00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:04,800
in the back a seat of the 
killer. 

336
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:09,600
Obviously be weird you. 
Both sat with your dad on his 

337
00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:13,560
knee. 
And my dad used to ask us sums 

338
00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:15,680
and ask us like is to spell 
shit. 

339
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:17,640
What does your dad have no chill
like? 

340
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:20,200
No, he's. 
Just been in school all day. 

341
00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:23,560
Yeah, there and back, but my I 
was smarter than my brother, who

342
00:16:23,560 --> 00:16:25,080
was two years older than me at 
this. 

343
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:27,360
We've established, Yeah, he's 
two years older. 

344
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:30,000
Yeah, so my dad would ask me and
he'd be all doing my shut up 

345
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:31,440
like don't want like. 
He'd be asking my brother. 

346
00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:36,040
He'd be like what, 7 * 5 plus 
whatever he would do like 3 

347
00:16:36,240 --> 00:16:38,200
threesomes. 
I said, plus whatever. 

348
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,120
You can't add that option. 
You're trying to do the sum. 

349
00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:43,960
There was no yeah. 
And I would like 35. 

350
00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:46,240
I would jump on and answer it. 
And he'd have to let her tell me

351
00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:48,280
to shut up and give my brother a
chance because he'd get really 

352
00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:50,080
upset because she's answering 
all of mine. 

353
00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:52,200
And then he'd be like, she 
always gets the easy ones. 

354
00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:54,160
And I'm like, no, you're just 
fucking fuck his champ. 

355
00:16:54,160 --> 00:17:04,119
Give me any sum. 6 * 4 + 5 * 2. 
34. 

356
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:05,280
Yeah, well done. 
That was quick. 

357
00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:10,440
No worries. 
Give me some. 46 * 98. 625. 

358
00:17:10,839 --> 00:17:12,960
No, you just made-up a number. 
Google it. 

359
00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:16,000
What do you want? 
You mean to glue? 

360
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,200
Giggle it. 
Do you know why I got really 

361
00:17:19,200 --> 00:17:21,160
good at maths? 
By the way, are you right? 

362
00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:26,000
No, all right. 
Imagine I was. 

363
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:29,640
That would be so freaky. 
The I failed my mass GCSE three 

364
00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:33,360
times which is 2 + 1 and. 
How did they let you do it three

365
00:17:33,360 --> 00:17:35,880
times? 
Because I failed it in school 

366
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:39,120
and then went to tech and then 
in tech after I'd already 

367
00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:42,080
enrolled and started the course.
They were like, shit, you needed

368
00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:43,560
a mass GC, We shouldn't have let
you in. 

369
00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:45,280
You needed a mass GCSE to do 
this. 

370
00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:47,520
And I went, well, I don't have 
it like I'm an idiot. 

371
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:52,560
And they went, will you reset it
this year through the tech? 

372
00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:55,640
And I went, yeah. 
And then I failed it because I 

373
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:59,600
had done no work since school, 
like I had not developed. 

374
00:17:59,680 --> 00:18:02,440
Added anything up since then. 
And then the next year they were

375
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:05,960
like right, will you at least 
say you'll try the exam again? 

376
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:08,720
I said yeah, when I did it in 
school, remember there was where

377
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:13,600
you do 2 maths exams for the 
GCSE in school to 1 + 1 and the 

378
00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:16,000
one you bring the calculator and
one you don't. 

379
00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:20,720
Yes, to bring the calculator. 
I brought a Smarties calculator 

380
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:23,360
that we had got. 
Which bring like a scientific 

381
00:18:23,360 --> 00:18:26,160
calculator. 
You know, it was an orange smart

382
00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:30,040
like the the calculator was like
a giant smarty with just one to 

383
00:18:30,080 --> 00:18:32,120
9 on it, nothing else. 
So I'm like. 

384
00:18:32,120 --> 00:18:34,440
Didn't even have all had one to 
9 on it it. 

385
00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:37,040
Had 1:00 to 9:00, but it didn't 
have like π you know, so I was 

386
00:18:37,040 --> 00:18:41,200
just doing 3.16. 
No 3.14. 

387
00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:43,400
Fuck, that's why I didn't get 
the exam. 

388
00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,200
What are your mom and dad think 
of? 

389
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:49,160
Like, you know, you've been on 
TV and like success and stand up

390
00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:51,000
and all that kind of thing. 
They love it. 

391
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:53,800
My ma is a pure things like she 
loves being outgoing. 

392
00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:56,200
Have you seen she just tells 
everyone like have you seen 

393
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:57,520
something? 
And they're like, no, just like,

394
00:18:57,520 --> 00:18:58,960
well, my daughter's on it. 
Like well, we haven't seen it. 

395
00:19:00,280 --> 00:19:04,000
My daughter's on it. 
My mom, like, was an actor. 

396
00:19:04,360 --> 00:19:06,800
Oh, right, question for moment 
that amateur. 

397
00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:07,920
I'm drum. 
I'm Drum. 

398
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:11,880
Mine did, I'm drum, mine did. 
She used to come down to Belfast

399
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:15,400
and do plays as like in her late
teens and she used to snog 

400
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:20,800
Germany as but exclusive. 
So did my mom. 

401
00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:23,720
We have our mums had a full 
fight. 

402
00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:29,240
I shouldn't make the same math. 
Well, I am what like where would

403
00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:32,280
you have done plays like? 
And now Bryce OK, and it's funny

404
00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:35,080
because she did she used to go 
and do Martin lunch plays for 

405
00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:37,760
black GBL was going to be GBL at
the time, but she's don't play 

406
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:40,680
for Martin lunch and she did a 
play 1 summer and the part that 

407
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,360
she played. 
What is she D? 

408
00:19:42,360 --> 00:19:44,960
Which is my dad's name. 
What does she say about Nesbitt 

409
00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:46,400
snogging? 
Like was he? 

410
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:55,800
Very wet. 
Wet and taste like champagne 

411
00:19:58,200 --> 00:19:59,800
always on it. 
I can bet you that. 

412
00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:02,200
They were, I think they must 
have been doing shows together, 

413
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:04,120
right? 
But I remember growing up and 

414
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,240
telling people in school that my
ma had a full relationship, 

415
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:11,320
which I was an awful liar. 
I was like, my ma was like, he 

416
00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:14,040
was nearly my dad. 
Like I think I expanded on it 

417
00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:16,000
massively throughout the span of
being in school. 

418
00:20:16,080 --> 00:20:17,840
My dad used to snog my my 
federage. 

419
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:20,600
Really. 
No. 

420
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:22,600
Hi. 
Oh, yes, he did as hi. 

421
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:26,720
Like yes, he like, yes, he no, 
yeah, yeah. 

422
00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:30,600
So I when I used to be like, see
him on TV and be like, he could 

423
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:31,960
have been my dad, yeah. 
That's not how it works. 

424
00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:33,040
That's not how it works. 
I know. 

425
00:20:33,040 --> 00:20:35,480
And I think that too. 
I think that doesn't work again.

426
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:37,640
No. 
Yeah. 

427
00:20:38,040 --> 00:20:39,600
Why did mom not? 
Why did mom not? 

428
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:41,920
Why did Mom stop? 
Knocked up? 

429
00:20:43,320 --> 00:20:45,880
No, I don't know. 
She was probably shit. 

430
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:52,080
I just, she shows you footage 
back and she's so bad, you know,

431
00:20:52,080 --> 00:20:54,280
like school around the corner, 
acting like when kids would come

432
00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:55,480
on and do like a monologue. 
Yeah. 

433
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:58,320
And Mommy did take us for 
chance. 

434
00:20:58,320 --> 00:20:59,920
Yeah. 
That would get me rolling so 

435
00:20:59,920 --> 00:21:01,520
many things. 
And why would it? 

436
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:03,200
What does your folks think about
you? 

437
00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:06,560
Do what you do. 
They love it. 

438
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,560
They like it. 
Very like, very supportive, but 

439
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:13,240
like we'll get annoyed if I 
don't remind them of things that

440
00:21:13,240 --> 00:21:18,000
I'm on, even if it's like, you 
know, if I'm on cue radio to 

441
00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:19,760
promote a gig they want. 
To hear. 

442
00:21:19,760 --> 00:21:22,560
It 5:00 to 7:00 in the morning. 
Why didn't you tell us? 

443
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:25,480
I was like, I didn't even know 
until like 10 minutes, you know?

444
00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,240
Do they could you talk about 
your dad quite a lot and do they

445
00:21:28,360 --> 00:21:30,480
does your dad like that? 
Does he buzz off that loves it? 

446
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:32,800
Does he love? 
It he'll be like here, don't be 

447
00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:35,800
flipping. 
He'd be like, don't be telling 

448
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:40,160
that story from 1992 where I've 
dropped the watermelon and 

449
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:41,720
Tenerife. 
You're like, well, I'd forgotten

450
00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:43,000
that story. 
He's like, well, I've got notes,

451
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:46,160
I've got notes. 
Nah, yeah, they love it. 

452
00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:48,520
Like. 
My my dad came to watch my 

453
00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:51,240
second ever stand up gig. 
That's brief. 

454
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:56,000
They loved it and I remember 
afterwards my dad going, you can

455
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:58,320
afford to be dirtier, you know 
that. 

456
00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,560
Give them the shock factor, lean
under that. 

457
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:04,120
And I was all like my dad gave 
me like I wanted to be a lawyer 

458
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:07,440
at one point whenever I was a 
teenager only because I'd watch 

459
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:11,200
Legally Blonde and I'd all A's 
and my A levels and all A stars 

460
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:13,440
and my GCS ES and like everyone 
was like, you need to do 

461
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:16,440
medicine or law. 
And I was like, but like, I'll 

462
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:18,760
not do medicine, but in law. 
Can I wear pencil skirt every 

463
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:19,880
day? 
And like, I want, I just wanted 

464
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:21,280
to be in a courtroom with like a
wee dog. 

465
00:22:21,680 --> 00:22:27,480
I lag inside courts putting on a
joyrider, you Rottweiler. 

466
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:29,680
I demand a recount. 
I'm not. 

467
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:30,960
What the fuck are we talking 
about? 

468
00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:35,240
But the mayor, you're confused. 
You wanted to be the mayor. 

469
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:36,440
That's why I don't become a 
lawyer. 

470
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:39,520
I didn't know like a stars and 
all that. 

471
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:42,680
Like I didn't know you. 
I would put you on like my level

472
00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:45,920
of smart, like I am relatively 
smart, but I thought you were 

473
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,840
also like kind of a wee, just a 
wee bit smart but not like very 

474
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:49,960
smart. 
No, I'm very smart. 

475
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:52,160
Not knowing what at the 
potential. 

476
00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:53,840
You lose it when you stop 
learning. 

477
00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:58,840
Yeah, but I was, I had, yeah. 
You sorry, can I say, are you 

478
00:22:58,840 --> 00:23:01,520
saying you've made a conscious 
decision to just stop learning? 

479
00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:03,120
Stop. 
Learning getting the car with 

480
00:23:03,120 --> 00:23:06,720
your dies like if if I had sex 
apples you're like shut the fuck

481
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:08,480
up. 
Yeah, also why if you're driving

482
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:11,520
while you in the back? 
But so he talked me. 

483
00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:14,760
Ought to be a lawyer and talked 
me into being an actor, which is

484
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:17,800
a brave move for a parent. 
Why would you talk someone into 

485
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:20,040
under the arts because it's so 
fucking up in a search. 

486
00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:22,720
But he was like, no, you don't 
want to you don't want to be a 

487
00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:24,120
lawyer. 
You want to be an actor. 

488
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:26,360
You want to be a lawyer because 
you think it'll be like acting 

489
00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:27,960
right. 
You know what I mean, because I 

490
00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:31,360
thought I'd be like lately 
blonde and it was talked me into

491
00:23:31,360 --> 00:23:32,640
being actors like that's what 
you should be doing. 

492
00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:35,440
That's what you want to do. 
So then he went and a degree in 

493
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:37,640
drama, which was absolutely 
fucking pointless. 

494
00:23:37,760 --> 00:23:39,600
You did a degree. 
See, that's one thing where I'm 

495
00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:41,480
like, can you actually like 
teach that? 

496
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:43,320
Like I'd say you do learn some 
valuable stuff, but. 

497
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:45,840
They say you can teach people 
how to be an actor in a drama 

498
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,600
school in a proper set and Joey 
like break them down, make them 

499
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:50,720
cry, make them fucking hate 
their that's what they do in 

500
00:23:50,720 --> 00:23:51,480
drama schools. 
They're I. 

501
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:53,480
Would never have gone back after
I cried. 

502
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:56,800
People like Breakdown fucking 
piss themselves. 

503
00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:58,160
I don't they're pissing 
themselves, but they're like 

504
00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:00,840
having an awful time. 
Like they do make you watch Big 

505
00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:02,520
Brother. 
People go in and they go through

506
00:24:02,520 --> 00:24:05,160
this like journey and they come 
out the other end like that 

507
00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:07,680
seems like a real experience, 
like they've come out there in a

508
00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:09,760
different person. 
I think that's what happened in 

509
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:11,920
drama school. 
What happened when I did a drama

510
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:13,280
degree, which is completely 
different. 

511
00:24:13,280 --> 00:24:14,680
What did you do? 
Queens Shite. 

512
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,200
It was shite. 
It was shite. 

513
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:21,200
I remember on the first day we 
had a tutor called Alison 

514
00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:23,640
Campbell, not the Madeline agent
Alison Campbell but a different 

515
00:24:23,640 --> 00:24:26,600
girl and she literally was like 
this is not RADA which is like a

516
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:29,200
well known drama school. 
By the way, not what you want to

517
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,480
hear on the 1st. 
Day, first day in a lecture. 

518
00:24:31,840 --> 00:24:33,960
And I was like, she was like, 
most of these aren't going to be

519
00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:35,960
actors or anything, anything. 
So you can get that out of your 

520
00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:37,720
head now. 
And as well, what the fuck am I 

521
00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:39,480
doing here? 
You're like, I'm going to be the

522
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:40,840
fucking mayor of Derry. 
I don't care. 

523
00:24:42,080 --> 00:24:45,320
And then Day 2, we had to be 
sandbags. 

524
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,640
Be sandbags. 
So we had to stand like this in 

525
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:52,520
that fucking theatre, right? 
Pretending to be a bag of sand 

526
00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:56,480
and a wee green of sand was 
leaving, escaping out of the bag

527
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:59,480
every second, and you had to 
become smaller and smaller and 

528
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:04,360
smaller, as slow as possible. 
I could not take that serious. 

529
00:25:04,360 --> 00:25:05,880
I I get kicked out of the 
course. 

530
00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:08,960
It was shite. 
It was absolute shite. 

531
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:11,840
I remember going how will this 
make me cry on demand? 

532
00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:14,600
Imagine though, if like you 
didn't take that seriously and 

533
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:18,360
then Netflix were doing like a 
600 million Belfast filmed 

534
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:21,840
production called The Sandbag 
and you didn't get it. 

535
00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:23,840
I could have done it. 
But I did. 

536
00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:26,840
But you know, I'd be a great 
song. 

537
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:29,840
When I was in first year Queens 
I was in Sketchy. 

538
00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:32,640
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 
But like a non speaking part and

539
00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:34,960
like I was with Kieran Bartlett.
I had a speaker part and I wish 

540
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:38,840
I didn't. 
Reggie and my my acting in it 

541
00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:40,760
was particularly bad. 
What were you doing on it? 

542
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:47,400
I don't remember units. 
I played someone was trying to 

543
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:52,440
proposition my granny in it or 
something and it was filmed down

544
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:55,280
Sea Park down here near like 
literally half a mile away from 

545
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:56,680
here and I remember there. 
Do you? 

546
00:25:56,840 --> 00:25:59,160
Only do things that's on a half 
a mile radius from where you 

547
00:25:59,160 --> 00:26:00,480
live. 
A1 mile radius. 

548
00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:03,440
Every mile you go outside of 
that radius, we add 20K to this 

549
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:05,120
day. 
But I just remember there being 

550
00:26:05,120 --> 00:26:08,120
people I vaguely knew being on 
the beach at during the summer 

551
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:11,080
and feeling so self-conscious. 
Like if you do that stuff at 

552
00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:13,600
drama school, like be a sandbag 
and all that. 

553
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:15,720
You, I I get that you break 
down. 

554
00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:18,080
Yeah, shame. 
Or like a feeling of 

555
00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:20,000
embarrassment. 
You're happy to be vulnerable in

556
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:20,880
front of people then? 
Right. 

557
00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:22,400
I'm not. 
Yeah, I'm not. 

558
00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:27,880
So I just felt really weird but.
With the sketchy though I was 

559
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:31,960
like a non speaking part and it 
was part of dear mid core was I 

560
00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:34,960
didn't me and here were on top 
of a bus at one point and I 

561
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:38,080
think one of us got thrown off 
the bus but it was like a shit 

562
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:39,760
dummy. 
Just won the Champions League. 

563
00:26:42,080 --> 00:26:44,200
Yes, we were parading around. 
Oh. 

564
00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:46,760
So yeah, so very well done, 
those sketches. 

565
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:50,200
BBC Northern Ireland schedule. 
This was what about 11:12? 

566
00:26:50,760 --> 00:26:55,120
Years ago. 11-12 years ago and 
Kieran in that top of the bus 

567
00:26:55,120 --> 00:26:56,880
thing. 
Kieran, he's told the story in 

568
00:26:56,880 --> 00:27:00,120
the podcast before, but if 
anyone missed it, he went in the

569
00:27:00,120 --> 00:27:02,480
audition for it and there was 
like the list of all the 

570
00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:04,760
characters and it was Gentleman 
Jack. 

571
00:27:04,760 --> 00:27:07,240
There was like a female role 
maybe you played and then it was

572
00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:10,640
Fat Alan and Kieran looked at 
the producers and said, what 

573
00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:13,720
role do you want me to? 
He was so fucked off. 

574
00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:16,800
But yeah, I think he falls off 
the top of the. 

575
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:20,080
Bus and I think he gets it's 
either me or him, gets thrown 

576
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:22,480
down the escalator. 
Then in another sketch, I can't 

577
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:24,440
remember what the idea behind it
was, but people were just 

578
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,800
getting chucked about the place.
But it was a real there was one 

579
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:30,480
dummy for for everybody to dress
it up in your clothes. 

580
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:33,640
So the same dummy was me and the
same dummy was Kieran. 

581
00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:38,560
What's the issue? 
Like I'm quite, I'm neither of 

582
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:46,880
us are in dragness. 
So I but yeah, so that was my 

583
00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:49,040
first like professional job, 
right? 

584
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:52,760
And I remember purposely, right,
I was filming on a day that I 

585
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:54,720
wasn't even in uni. 
Like I was like, I was, I was 

586
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,160
off that day. 
So the next day when I went down

587
00:27:57,160 --> 00:28:01,400
to uni, I purposely went in late
so that I could be all sorry. 

588
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:03,280
I was just off filming, I think 
for the BBC. 

589
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:04,240
I'm really sorry about being 
late. 

590
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:07,080
So I'm gonna so I'm just on a 
sketch of the BBC. 

591
00:28:07,360 --> 00:28:09,800
So I was like, I was like 19 
been all sorry. 

592
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:11,840
I know what I said. 
Big North face coat. 

593
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:15,040
Yeah, my BBC lanyard don't even 
need fun. 

594
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:18,200
I made it myself. 
I just made sure to tell 

595
00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:20,520
everybody I was on this all so I
oh, I know reasons are like 

596
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:21,920
learning how to act. 
I was just offered 

597
00:28:22,360 --> 00:28:25,160
professionally there so. 
Send the lecture you're like if 

598
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:26,600
you need to take a break or any 
you want me to. 

599
00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:28,480
Jump in, Stephen. 
I am. 

600
00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:33,200
How much at the time do you did 
you feel like I definitely did 

601
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:38,200
that doing like low budget BBC 
Northern Ireland sketch show 

602
00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:40,440
going out fucking 1035 at a 
Wednesday night. 

603
00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:44,280
That was the pinnacle. 
You were like, it doesn't get 

604
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:46,240
better than this. 
No, this is people are going to 

605
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:49,120
see this. 
It's going to lead to all this 

606
00:28:49,120 --> 00:28:51,640
stuff. 
Like you, that you have such 

607
00:28:51,640 --> 00:28:54,120
idea as a grandeur when you're 
so young and you get your first 

608
00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:56,040
job. 
I remember when I was like 

609
00:28:56,120 --> 00:28:59,320
living a dairy before I moved to
Belfast as a teenager, thinking 

610
00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:02,720
that I you always think you're 
going to get spotted, don't you?

611
00:29:02,920 --> 00:29:04,840
Like you're going to be like 
drinking coffee somewhere and 

612
00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:08,160
someone's going to go. 
We need you in Hollyoaks. 

613
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:10,880
Yeah, because like that sort of 
stuff does happen probably in 

614
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:13,040
like LA and stuff because 
everyone's an actor, some coffee

615
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:16,320
shops, you know, the waiter, A 
producer will speak to the 

616
00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:18,040
waiter and be like, do you act 
like you have a fucking great 

617
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:20,200
way about you? 
But like, sitting in fucking 

618
00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:22,720
narrow and Botanic, no one's 
coming up to you being like, 

619
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:25,680
listen, Game of Thrones reboot, 
your new series of Game of 

620
00:29:25,680 --> 00:29:26,600
Thrones. 
You want to be in it. 

621
00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:29,920
Someone's got to go and go. 
There's a sketch you being made 

622
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:31,720
for BBC and I. 
We need someone to be chocked 

623
00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:33,880
off an escalator. 
You won't have any lines. 

624
00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:35,640
Yeah. 
Are you in uni? 

625
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:39,240
That's as far as it goes. 
But I remember thinking, oh, I'm

626
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,640
going to move to Battlefast and 
like, I'll just get spotted 

627
00:29:41,640 --> 00:29:44,960
because Belfast was like big 
bright, like this big thing. 

628
00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:46,320
I was like, it was like 
Hollywood. 

629
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:47,800
I was like, this is like such a 
big deal. 

630
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:49,760
And then don't. 
Ever compare Belfast to 

631
00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:51,120
Hollywood? 
Well, not this Hollywood. 

632
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:55,680
The proper one, the one, the 
other one on the bright of the 

633
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,680
hill. 
The one in LA, Isn't it in LA? 

634
00:29:58,800 --> 00:29:59,800
Yeah, yeah. 
Fuck me. 

635
00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:02,160
Yeah. 
And I was convinced. 

636
00:30:02,160 --> 00:30:03,720
What did you in your geography? 
GCC. 

637
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:07,520
That's the one I got an A star, 
but only because I can recount 

638
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,600
information. 
I have no idea. 

639
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:11,400
I have no idea where any 
countries are. 

640
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:14,560
I got a map put on my wall. 
I got one made out of wood, 

641
00:30:14,880 --> 00:30:15,760
right? 
It's nice. 

642
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:18,480
It's a feature in our living 
room and it's on the wall of the

643
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:21,960
world so that I can learn. 
So, so far I've learned 

644
00:30:22,080 --> 00:30:25,920
Australia, Madagascar. 
What do you mean you've learned 

645
00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:29,400
Australia? 
Where it is on the map, I 

646
00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:30,760
literally don't know where 
anywhere is. 

647
00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:34,680
Malaysia is down near there, and
the Philippines, they're all 

648
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:35,920
down this corner. 
Yeah. 

649
00:30:36,400 --> 00:30:39,920
And then we're up and I'm and 
I'm going to work my every week 

650
00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:41,040
or so. 
I'm not going to overwhelm 

651
00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:43,720
myself with the countries. 
But why do you need to learn? 

652
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:46,080
Why do you think you're going to
be a situation where just you'll

653
00:30:46,080 --> 00:30:48,880
be walking at home after a gig 
one night to your car and a guy 

654
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:52,640
will step out of an alleyway and
go point to point to the Cayman 

655
00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:55,840
Islands right now? 
Yeah, well, you just don't know 

656
00:30:55,840 --> 00:30:57,200
when you might need that 
information. 

657
00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:00,360
Can I ask you your country and 
you tell me what continent it's 

658
00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:02,440
in maybe? 
Absolutely not. 

659
00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:04,440
I'll have I can tell you no, 
you'll get it wrong. 

660
00:31:04,440 --> 00:31:05,840
You can try. 
Bolivia. 

661
00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:07,640
Don't even know where that is. 
Don't know. 

662
00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:14,160
I mean, I don't know what's what
the which, what's name some 

663
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:16,960
continents, Asia, Bolivia would 
be in Europe. 

664
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:21,640
Is that no See, this is this is 
the thing that fails me. 

665
00:31:21,640 --> 00:31:23,520
Is the geography. 
Yeah. 

666
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:26,040
Do you know what I mean? 
I don't know where anywhere is. 

667
00:31:26,160 --> 00:31:27,320
I don't mind. 
I can get there. 

668
00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:29,480
I stood. 
You can get there. 

669
00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:31,560
I can get to places, but I don't
know. 

670
00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:34,440
How you could where they are. 
You know what Bolivia is, but 

671
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:37,680
today you could get there. 
If we needed to do the podcast 

672
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:40,400
there, you'd be there. 
I could pick a flight and go 

673
00:31:40,440 --> 00:31:42,600
there, but I wouldn't know what 
fucking continent them in. 

674
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:45,280
Do you know what I mean? 
Like I. 

675
00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:49,280
Yeah. 
No, I used to get the 212, the 

676
00:31:49,280 --> 00:31:51,320
bus from Belfast to Derry all 
the time because it was a 

677
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:53,440
student living in Belfast. 
When you got to Belfast, were 

678
00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:55,760
you like what content? 
Where is this? 

679
00:31:56,800 --> 00:31:59,000
But then whenever I got a car I 
saw I don't know how to fucking 

680
00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:00,600
drive to Derry. 
I've travelled that journey 

681
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:03,600
thousands of times and I don't 
know how to drive to Derry. 

682
00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:08,480
But you understand the signs. 
I'll, I'll read them wrong, 

683
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:10,240
right. 
Some of them say Londonderry, 

684
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:12,080
some of them say Derry. 
I don't know where the fuck I'm 

685
00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:13,440
going. 
Yeah, yeah. 

686
00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:15,840
So anyway, geography is not my 
strong point. 

687
00:32:15,920 --> 00:32:17,440
So I'm, I'm going to teach 
myself. 

688
00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:19,000
Some countries. 
You just don't know when you're 

689
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:20,520
going to need. 
It Yeah. 

690
00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:22,600
Like right now, yeah. 
You need it. 

691
00:32:22,600 --> 00:32:24,040
I need it to know where Bolivia 
was. 

692
00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:24,880
Yeah. 
Yeah. 

693
00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:27,040
Do you know where all the 
countries are, Sean? 

694
00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:28,640
Like my husband, Like he knows 
where they all are. 

695
00:32:29,760 --> 00:32:32,440
I think most people they. 
Do but then kind of like it's 

696
00:32:32,440 --> 00:32:36,280
weird to me that user like like 
memorising this and learning 

697
00:32:36,280 --> 00:32:40,440
this, you know? 
See I as I was, I said it on 

698
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:42,160
like I don't learn things 
anymore, but it's. 

699
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:44,640
Such a 1700s. 
Thing to learn. 

700
00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:48,040
Thing to be like my husband 
could put anywhere in the map 

701
00:32:48,960 --> 00:32:54,320
just blind. 
Yeah, it's like a party trick. 

702
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:55,720
You can. 
Turkmenistan. 

703
00:32:56,760 --> 00:33:01,760
Yeah, he does it again. 
Because like every now and then 

704
00:33:01,760 --> 00:33:03,720
I like, I'd be like, I should 
learn a new skill and every now 

705
00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:05,560
and then I'd like get like a 
keyboard out and like I'm going 

706
00:33:05,560 --> 00:33:07,720
to learn a song. 
Like I teach myself a song on 

707
00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:10,880
the keyboard and then I forget 
it like a week later and I'll 

708
00:33:10,880 --> 00:33:12,840
never go back to it. 
And then a couple months that 

709
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:16,720
are back all there and where 
some countries are like to 

710
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:20,320
learn. 
Do you not have any like have 

711
00:33:20,320 --> 00:33:21,880
you learned any new skills as an
adult? 

712
00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:22,880
No. 
Why I? 

713
00:33:24,360 --> 00:33:27,600
Mean why? 
You know, it's so. 

714
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:29,880
It's definitely like, I don't 
know, it's harder to learn 

715
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:31,880
things when you're an adult. 
Oh, it's so much harder. 

716
00:33:31,880 --> 00:33:34,280
Like I tried to teach myself the
alphabet back to front. 

717
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:38,400
I'll learn a new what? 
I can't do it but I. 

718
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:40,640
John, do you want to both try 
and do it really quick? 

719
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:42,920
Just have one bash? 
I don't even think, don't think.

720
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:43,760
Right. 
Ready. 

721
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:48,160
Yeah, ZX. 
WMTS are. 

722
00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:51,120
You done? 
No, I only knew Z. 

723
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:56,840
Yeah, it's really difficult, but
I always thought, do you know 

724
00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:58,680
what it must be? 
I mustn't, I mustn't be that 

725
00:33:58,680 --> 00:34:00,720
interesting of a person. 
And I'd be like, if I could do 

726
00:34:00,720 --> 00:34:02,520
that, that'd be impressive. 
Yeah. 

727
00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:04,760
People would like that, Yeah. 
Do you know what I mean? 

728
00:34:04,920 --> 00:34:06,440
I can't say the longest word in 
the dictionary. 

729
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:09,320
I did establishmentarianism. 
No much of microscopics look of 

730
00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:11,440
mechanical noses. 
So you're from Derry? 

731
00:34:11,440 --> 00:34:13,520
I don't know whether you're just
asking me how I am or. 

732
00:34:13,719 --> 00:34:17,679
It's a long condition if I'm 
inhaling too much ash from the 

733
00:34:17,679 --> 00:34:20,679
coal mines, yeah. 
It'd be so inconvenient to have 

734
00:34:20,679 --> 00:34:21,719
that they'll always have to say 
it. 

735
00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:23,639
Yeah, you just feel like my 
lungs are fucked. 

736
00:34:23,639 --> 00:34:30,040
Well, you're also going to I've 
got no more sorry. 

737
00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:31,360
You wouldn't fucking get it out.
You're. 

738
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:33,199
Dead, you're posthumously 
telling people. 

739
00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:38,400
It's like a, I'm assuming it's 
like some sort of fucking 

740
00:34:38,400 --> 00:34:40,639
prehistoric illness that people 
wouldn't have that now, Yeah. 

741
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:44,760
Do you what like since you 
joined the panel of the blame 

742
00:34:44,760 --> 00:34:46,080
game? 
Because we're telling me BC 

743
00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:48,679
Northern Ireland shows it's one 
that's been around like. 

744
00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:51,840
It's like 19 seasons. 
It's done by 15 years. 

745
00:34:53,199 --> 00:34:57,320
When you joined that, is that 
something like people were 

746
00:34:57,320 --> 00:34:59,440
saying to your mum and dad? 
I feel like that's when people 

747
00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:01,320
be going up to your mum and dad 
and be like, oh, why? 

748
00:35:01,320 --> 00:35:04,360
Like friends of theirs. 
I it was actually more get my 

749
00:35:04,360 --> 00:35:07,560
hairpiece and the blame game to 
thank just any yeah, anything 

750
00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:10,520
with Tim Guerry attached. 
Tim, Tim we have an unwritten 

751
00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:12,000
rule now. 
He's not really he's just not 

752
00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:15,560
letting work unless I'm there. 
Yeah, he does a radio show that 

753
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:17,040
I'm not in and I'm not happy 
about it. 

754
00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:18,440
Right. 
Called the long and the short of

755
00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:21,680
it. 
I'd be like why I'm in all your 

756
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:24,440
other things like why what's 
what's your problem? 

757
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:28,360
But with the blame game, like, I
think it's great because it's 

758
00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:32,000
been good on for so long. 
And this, the same panel has 

759
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:33,120
been on it for years and years 
and years. 

760
00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:34,920
So I'm like, I feel so fucking 
privileged. 

761
00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:35,200
Yeah. 
Yeah. 

762
00:35:35,200 --> 00:35:37,040
Joined it like it's the only 
time they've ever changed the 

763
00:35:37,040 --> 00:35:39,160
panel, like on a permanent 
basis. 

764
00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:40,040
I hope so. 
Fuck. 

765
00:35:40,040 --> 00:35:40,880
You never know what could 
happen. 

766
00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:42,040
I might not be back again. 
Who knows? 

767
00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:44,480
Yeah. 
And but I thank my mind because 

768
00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:46,800
they've watched that as well. 
And with Get My Hairpiece, they 

769
00:35:46,800 --> 00:35:49,640
watched her grown up there, all 
biz that I'm Uncle Andy's 

770
00:35:49,640 --> 00:35:50,640
daughter. 
Yeah. 

771
00:35:50,880 --> 00:35:54,840
Like that's like, it's funny how
you could be cast and loads of 

772
00:35:54,840 --> 00:35:57,240
different stuff, but actually 
something you've watched since 

773
00:35:57,240 --> 00:36:00,640
you've grown up a character like
like everyone knows your Uncle 

774
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:02,640
Andy is. 
Yeah, but like I like, so like 

775
00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:05,200
to get that is like such a big 
deal because you're like, I 

776
00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:07,480
fucking love that show. 
Like I used to watch get my 

777
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:11,480
headpiece every Friday at my 
granny and grandmas house and I,

778
00:36:12,720 --> 00:36:15,600
it was like our thing. 
So you watch it at the same time

779
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:19,000
and I'm like crack it up because
I it's something on TV and I 

780
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:20,840
know where they're talking about
in the jokes. 

781
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:23,200
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 
Bel there's some places in 

782
00:36:23,200 --> 00:36:25,800
Belfast and. 
I would go there but it's more 

783
00:36:25,800 --> 00:36:27,440
than nought .5 miles from my 
house. 

784
00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:28,360
Yeah. 
Exactly. 

785
00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:29,960
No. 
But from Hollywood you can see 

786
00:36:29,960 --> 00:36:32,240
over the lock. 
So we would look with telescopes

787
00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:34,280
at the troubles and that kind of
thing, you know. 

788
00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:36,800
They're having an awful time 
over there. 

789
00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:45,360
And and then like years later, I
was sending my granny like years

790
00:36:45,360 --> 00:36:47,760
after I wasn't there every 
Friday night, obviously. 

791
00:36:47,760 --> 00:36:50,440
And I was like, remember, we 
used to every Friday. 

792
00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:52,880
We didn't. 
We love giving my hair was not 

793
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:56,040
the best granny and my granny 
was like, it's how much my 

794
00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:58,960
granny loved me. 
She was like, I and never, it 

795
00:36:58,960 --> 00:37:02,480
was never really my cup of tea. 
And I was like, you betrayed me.

796
00:37:02,680 --> 00:37:05,400
I was like, Peggy, you watch 
that every Friday with me. 

797
00:37:05,520 --> 00:37:08,560
And she laughed a lot. 
I'd be like, I'm such a bad guy 

798
00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:10,080
for like it's something funny on
TV. 

799
00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:12,680
I'm like, yeah, what about laugh
at all? 

800
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:14,280
Laugh at all? 
Do you love that? 

801
00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:17,480
But yeah, just. 
She just particularly didn't 

802
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:18,680
enjoy it. 
But. 

803
00:37:18,680 --> 00:37:20,840
But it meant enough to me that 
she was like. 

804
00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:24,240
She watched it for you. 
But Uncle, like Uncle Andy, is 

805
00:37:24,240 --> 00:37:27,440
such a phenomenal character. 
And then sometimes you see the 

806
00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:30,520
guy, I don't even know his name.
The guy plays him, You see him 

807
00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:33,240
walking about Belfast and you're
like, oh, there he is. 

808
00:37:33,280 --> 00:37:34,880
He's just like going about his 
daily business. 

809
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:36,800
And he's like, he works full 
time with Queen. 

810
00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:39,680
He's a lecturer, right? 
He just computer stuff, okay, 

811
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:44,200
right, right. 
I just can't like an IT problem 

812
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:49,040
and you like had to go to him. 
God, my keypad stuck on my mouse

813
00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:53,400
doesn't work and I just imagine 
being like, you know, some sort 

814
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:54,800
of joke. 
And like, his voice isn't that 

815
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:56,880
isn't his voice either. 
Like obviously pits that folks 

816
00:37:56,880 --> 00:37:59,480
breaks my heart. 
But when I know whenever and 

817
00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:01,200
he's got full grey hair, he 
wears a wig now. 

818
00:38:01,240 --> 00:38:04,320
So they've had to make a wig now
to match what his hair was like 

819
00:38:04,320 --> 00:38:07,320
when it started 25 years ago. 
Like he's not aged. 

820
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:10,600
But whenever I joined as Uncle 
Andy's daughter, I really wanted

821
00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:13,000
to have the Tash and the hair. 
I was like, can we dress me? 

822
00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:16,600
I was like, I'm like an Uncle 
Andy, like an andragonist Uncle 

823
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:18,080
Andy. 
Dan, write it down. 

824
00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:20,040
Name of the episode of Dragon is
Uncle Andy. 

825
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:23,600
And that's what I wanted. 
And they were like, no, she's a 

826
00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:25,720
goth. 
And I was like, oh, I would love

827
00:38:25,920 --> 00:38:28,160
to, you know, because my 
character doesn't know that 

828
00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:29,520
she's Uncle Andy's daughter, 
right? 

829
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:31,080
And I forget sometimes I'd be 
all day. 

830
00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:32,440
I know yet or not. 
And they're like, no, no, she 

831
00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:34,160
doesn't know. 
I can't remember what happens in

832
00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:36,960
the in the show half the time so
I was like oh but I would love 

833
00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:39,360
it if she just looked exactly 
like him but wasn't aware, do 

834
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:41,080
you know what I mean? 
And was walking around just with

835
00:38:41,080 --> 00:38:42,880
a wee hairdo in the leather 
jacket and all that. 

836
00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:45,200
They didn't. 
Go for it. 

837
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:48,320
The blame game. 
I get my hairpiece. 

838
00:38:48,360 --> 00:38:51,800
Obviously like the two probably 
2 of the biggest BBC Northern 

839
00:38:51,800 --> 00:38:54,880
Ireland shows. 
Do you notice that the more 

840
00:38:54,880 --> 00:38:58,400
stuff you're on and the more 
you're on screen, do you get 

841
00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:01,800
more like, Because like, I've 
definitely had it with doing TV 

842
00:39:01,800 --> 00:39:04,640
shows, you get like obviously a 
bit of stick for being in 

843
00:39:04,640 --> 00:39:06,440
anything. 
Doesn't matter how good or bad 

844
00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:08,840
it is. 
There are people who just don't 

845
00:39:08,840 --> 00:39:13,000
like you being on screen who 
like get personally offended 

846
00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:15,960
when you're on a programme. 
They're like, oh for fuck's 

847
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:18,320
sake. 
Like, it definitely comes with a

848
00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:22,360
bit of criticism, but did you 
notice it like more with a 

849
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,800
particular show or do you notice
a particular thing, people? 

850
00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:28,840
We did dry your eyes recently, 
so it was like a re bit of the 

851
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:31,160
old sketch show Dry your eyes. 
And we just done one episode of 

852
00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:33,640
pilot and it got wrapped to shit
online. 

853
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:36,360
Like there was so much hate, 
like I don't like it, literally 

854
00:39:36,360 --> 00:39:37,760
doesn't see anything good about 
it online. 

855
00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:43,760
It was lots of shit and somebody
there was just people, like many

856
00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:45,800
people going. 
I'm fucking sick of her now. 

857
00:39:46,240 --> 00:39:48,640
Like, why should I share this as
well? 

858
00:39:48,840 --> 00:39:51,120
She was a flick. 
Yeah, I'm too overexposed. 

859
00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:54,360
They're like, she needs to fuck 
off, like and people just 

860
00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:55,880
feeling really strongly about 
that. 

861
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:59,360
I should have less of a career. 
Yeah, she shouldn't be on. 

862
00:39:59,480 --> 00:39:59,920
Me. 
Yeah. 

863
00:39:59,960 --> 00:40:03,400
Go home. 
Yeah, and even you just get like

864
00:40:03,680 --> 00:40:06,680
people who are just she's, she's
not funny. 

865
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:08,320
And you're like, but that's I 
didn't like that. 

866
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:13,320
Is there like sexist stuff, if 
you know what I mean? 

867
00:40:13,320 --> 00:40:15,600
Is there like? 
On the blame game, there was a 

868
00:40:15,600 --> 00:40:18,120
whole thing on not a whole thing
two people were tweeting about. 

869
00:40:19,720 --> 00:40:25,760
There was a saga about. 
A man had tweeted me go and I'm 

870
00:40:25,760 --> 00:40:30,920
really disappointed in you. 
Curse using the F word and like 

871
00:40:30,920 --> 00:40:35,000
gratuitously on the blame game. 
Massive. 

872
00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:44,200
No, I mean, was that the word? 
I think I finally lost it. 

873
00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:46,520
I'm like what a Fenian to say 
that. 

874
00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:59,080
What a Fenian thing to say. 
Yeah he was fucking raging but I

875
00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:00,920
had said fuck about 6 times in a
row. 

876
00:41:01,040 --> 00:41:04,160
But you know what happened. 
So I just for balance in a 

877
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:06,280
couple of seconds, say something
and I'll just and I'll say the 

878
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:08,440
opposite, right. 
Oh. 

879
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:12,360
So there's two people tweeting 
I, this other guy hung I. 

880
00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:14,680
Fucking didn't know where to go 
for. 

881
00:41:14,680 --> 00:41:15,960
That, thank God, we have to 
check that off. 

882
00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:18,920
Yes, for balance. 
So you say you literally said 

883
00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:20,600
fuck. 
What happened is I was trying to

884
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:23,760
read a quote that I had written 
down of somebody I saw and your 

885
00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:25,520
mom was saying this and I 
couldn't find the fucking page. 

886
00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:27,000
It was the first episode and 
it's really nervous. 

887
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:28,640
And I was all fuck, what the 
fuck? 

888
00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:31,200
What the fuck did he say? 
And it comes up on the do you if

889
00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:33,200
you put the subtitles on, it's 
all fuck, what the fuck on the 

890
00:41:33,320 --> 00:41:35,080
on the bottom of the screen and 
all that's it's all fuck, fuck, 

891
00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:37,040
what the fuck? 
And you know, and this guy was 

892
00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:39,600
all I'm really disappointed in 
you for using like gratuitously 

893
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:42,520
using the F word and stuff that 
was so unnecessary and very own 

894
00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:45,480
ladylike. 
And then Neil tweeted him going 

895
00:41:45,480 --> 00:41:48,080
see, to be honest, we all said 
fuck and every single panellist 

896
00:41:48,080 --> 00:41:49,760
has said fuck on that show. 
It's not that big a deal. 

897
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:51,960
It's just another word. 
And he was like, no, it's really

898
00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:54,200
unnecessary. 
And it really it made me turn 

899
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:56,360
the show off and I no longer 
find it funny because she used 

900
00:41:56,360 --> 00:41:59,160
the word fuck too many times. 
And then Colin and Tim and 

901
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:01,520
everyone was tweeting them going
you're you're literally just 

902
00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:03,000
giving her shit because she's a 
girl. 

903
00:42:03,200 --> 00:42:06,400
All of us said fuck within the 
same 1015 seconds. 

904
00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:08,360
Everyone cursed, but he aimed at
me. 

905
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:10,080
So there's definitely better 
sexism. 

906
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:11,960
Do you know what I mean? 
I've had people come over to 

907
00:42:11,960 --> 00:42:14,200
make eggs going. 
I normally don't find girls 

908
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:15,800
funny, but that was that was all
right. 

909
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:18,640
And you're like, that's so 
fucking ridiculous that you've 

910
00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:21,640
decided all girls aren't funny. 
Yeah, that's mental. 

911
00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:23,040
Yeah. 
That's like, only nobody don't 

912
00:42:23,040 --> 00:42:24,240
like food. 
But that Chinese. 

913
00:42:24,240 --> 00:42:26,880
And they think that that's a 
compliment, you know what I 

914
00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:29,880
mean? 
Or like you're 1. 

915
00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:31,920
You've chosen me to laugh at. 
Thank you. 

916
00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:35,320
Literally like I remember being 
it when I was first starting 

917
00:42:35,800 --> 00:42:38,400
being at a gig and an MC who I 
swear to God I can't remember 

918
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:41,680
who will said I don't think this
person do stand up anymore. 

919
00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:45,160
Said wasn't she brilliant were 
so funny for a girl. 

920
00:42:45,640 --> 00:42:48,960
I was like, Oh no, I know it was
me who had been on, so that's 

921
00:42:48,960 --> 00:42:53,080
why I was personally offended. 
That's just as bad as someone 

922
00:42:53,080 --> 00:42:55,560
bringing on say it's going 
there's a wee boy here, he's 

923
00:42:55,560 --> 00:42:57,920
going to come on and do a wee 
for a couple of wee yarns, a wee

924
00:42:57,920 --> 00:43:00,400
joke, which are you have a fun 
wee time He's. 

925
00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:04,720
Going to do his best and I did 
the Blame Game radio show once 

926
00:43:04,720 --> 00:43:09,160
and you know before unlike think
that everyone know like 

927
00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:11,920
beforehand. 
Obviously it's not scripted, but

928
00:43:11,920 --> 00:43:15,320
you go here's a few topical 
things we might talk about and 

929
00:43:15,320 --> 00:43:17,840
you obviously go away. 
Everyone who watches will 

930
00:43:17,840 --> 00:43:22,720
understand that same any topical
panel show and I was to do a bit

931
00:43:22,720 --> 00:43:25,760
about Conor McGregor right. 
So this is years ago and we did 

932
00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:30,720
it in one of the QFT spaces and 
it's my first. 

933
00:43:30,720 --> 00:43:33,280
I've never done a panel show. 
I'm like a bit nervous and but 

934
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:35,640
like, I know everyone on it 
because it doesn't stand up with

935
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:39,760
them and it's a particularly 
like tough crowd. 

936
00:43:40,040 --> 00:43:42,480
They're just not into it for 
whatever reason. 

937
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:47,840
It was like a third fool. 
So it was just a, it was a bad 

938
00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:49,680
night. 
And I'm like getting ready with 

939
00:43:49,680 --> 00:43:52,760
my, I'm like, this is my like 
bit towards the start of the 

940
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:54,800
show. 
So Tim's there. 

941
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:56,960
And like, they couldn't create a
bet. 

942
00:43:56,960 --> 00:43:59,520
Like I've done a couple of panel
shows and they couldn't create a

943
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:01,320
better atmosphere. 
It's always been like a great 

944
00:44:01,320 --> 00:44:04,040
atmosphere of like, we're going 
to tee you up for this thing. 

945
00:44:04,040 --> 00:44:06,280
Yeah, they're brilliant. 
Right and and they don't talk 

946
00:44:06,280 --> 00:44:09,360
over you and that kind of thing.
So I'm like getting ready for my

947
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:11,040
thing. 
Like bang, I've got like 5 jokes

948
00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:12,560
about Conor McGregor. 
Here we go. 

949
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:17,560
And Tim is doing a bit and he's 
like blah blah blah MMA 

950
00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:19,920
fighters, you know, Irish 
fighters and blah blah blah. 

951
00:44:20,600 --> 00:44:23,720
And I'm like listening to Tim's 
bit like this. 

952
00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:26,560
And then there's I'm aware. 
Then there's a silence and Tim's

953
00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:29,320
like, yeah, you know, Conor 
McGregor's been in the news. 

954
00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:30,680
And I'm like, I don't want to 
talk over Tim. 

955
00:44:31,160 --> 00:44:34,840
And another, another 3 seconds 
goes past and Tim goes, she had 

956
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:38,840
got anything on Conor McGregor? 
And I'm like, yes, Tim, I do. 

957
00:44:40,360 --> 00:44:42,360
Here is my joke. 
But we made it your goal. 

958
00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:44,520
And then and then after that I 
was like, oh, I'm not nervous 

959
00:44:44,520 --> 00:44:47,400
anymore. 
But like, I, I, well, panel 

960
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:49,600
shows and things like that. 
Like I found it hard to not like

961
00:44:49,680 --> 00:44:52,600
interrupt because there is a 
structure of in some way, yeah. 

962
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:55,920
Yeah, so, so basically with the 
blame game too is like you, you,

963
00:44:56,000 --> 00:44:59,440
you have a you're leading one of
the questions who's to blame for

964
00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:02,000
and you do like a four or five 
minute bit and then people jump 

965
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:04,320
in. 
But the it's really hard to know

966
00:45:04,320 --> 00:45:06,320
when to jump in because you 
like, are they done there? 

967
00:45:06,320 --> 00:45:09,400
But also you always have to go 
over to Tim as well and like, 

968
00:45:10,080 --> 00:45:11,240
what the fuck are you saying in 
your entre? 

969
00:45:11,240 --> 00:45:13,360
Because I don't want that to be 
similar to what my bet is. 

970
00:45:13,360 --> 00:45:15,200
And then you've done it. 
And then I start to do my bet 

971
00:45:15,200 --> 00:45:17,040
and then it's like, well, you've
already done it because that 

972
00:45:17,040 --> 00:45:19,320
happens a lot. 
And also, is it hard like if 

973
00:45:19,320 --> 00:45:22,040
you've got a because when you're
doing stand up, if you think of 

974
00:45:22,040 --> 00:45:25,480
a punch line or a bit, you can 
just stop what you're saying and

975
00:45:25,480 --> 00:45:29,080
fire that bit, interchange it. 
But on a show like that, I 

976
00:45:29,080 --> 00:45:31,920
imagine if a subject brought up 
and say, Neil Dellamyers in the 

977
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:35,000
middle of like a great monologue
about something and you have a 

978
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:38,360
zinger of a line, do you sit 
there and be like, right, I've 

979
00:45:38,360 --> 00:45:40,080
got this. 
But then the moment passes, 

980
00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:41,840
you're the fuck. 
That would have been so good. 

981
00:45:41,840 --> 00:45:44,280
I'd hate that. 
All the time and you're all. 

982
00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:49,000
Do you remember earlier on when 
you said about that was not 

983
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:50,640
funny what I've got to say about
it. 

984
00:45:50,640 --> 00:45:52,120
And you're like and then you're 
hoping to edit. 

985
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:55,320
It'll be edited together. 
Four weeks ago, you said. 

986
00:45:56,000 --> 00:46:00,360
Whenever we were in learn. 
But what I find interesting is 

987
00:46:00,360 --> 00:46:04,200
that Colin and I always seem to 
write very similar stuff, right?

988
00:46:04,320 --> 00:46:06,240
Like we come in and he'll be 
doing a bit and I'll be like, 

989
00:46:06,240 --> 00:46:08,960
fuck sake, let's strike it off 
my page and. 

990
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:13,240
Is there like a higher like 
hierarchy experience type thing 

991
00:46:13,240 --> 00:46:16,920
where it's like is there an 
element of like like last in the

992
00:46:16,920 --> 00:46:19,600
doors or like? 
You know, I know what you mean. 

993
00:46:19,920 --> 00:46:23,080
It's just it's, it's they're 
very good for like there's 

994
00:46:23,080 --> 00:46:25,520
always a shit question because 
they do 4 questions. 

995
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:27,960
There's always one that nobody 
wants to do because it's like 

996
00:46:28,200 --> 00:46:30,680
whatever drags are left of the 
news stories of the week. 

997
00:46:31,040 --> 00:46:34,880
And they've been very kind to 
not let make me do it more than,

998
00:46:34,960 --> 00:46:36,040
you know, I've done like once or
twice. 

999
00:46:36,040 --> 00:46:40,040
But Neil and Colin could fucking
make anything funny. 

1000
00:46:40,160 --> 00:46:41,560
Do you know what I mean? 
They really could. 

1001
00:46:41,840 --> 00:46:44,480
Neil can. 
Neil knows more about northern 

1002
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:47,560
politics than most people in the
North, you know what I mean? 

1003
00:46:47,600 --> 00:46:50,600
So he can, he can, he can fire 
away and talk about anything. 

1004
00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:54,040
They've been very good to let me
do my but first. 

1005
00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:57,480
I think at times because of 
being I'm new and I'm usually 

1006
00:46:57,480 --> 00:46:58,640
sitting there shitting myself. 
Yeah. 

1007
00:46:58,880 --> 00:47:03,080
Do you prefer, I probably like 
you did the podcast when when it

1008
00:47:03,080 --> 00:47:07,080
was like in Zoom times, remember
the Zoom era of humanity. 

1009
00:47:07,440 --> 00:47:10,360
And then I don't know if I asked
you them, but like what do you 

1010
00:47:10,360 --> 00:47:12,280
prefer? 
Do you prefer live performing or

1011
00:47:12,280 --> 00:47:19,480
you prefer acting? 
I think probably live 

1012
00:47:19,480 --> 00:47:22,040
performing. 
No, it's changed. 

1013
00:47:22,080 --> 00:47:26,040
I think the direction I'm going 
and has changed over the past 

1014
00:47:26,040 --> 00:47:27,480
year. 
I was always adamant that I 

1015
00:47:27,480 --> 00:47:30,160
wanted to be like AI wanted to 
do like dramas. 

1016
00:47:30,160 --> 00:47:33,080
I was like, I wanna be in 
fucking like, you know, big 

1017
00:47:33,080 --> 00:47:39,320
dramas. 
And now I'm like, I'm happy to 

1018
00:47:39,320 --> 00:47:41,520
just do comedy night. 
Like not just you come, I'm 

1019
00:47:41,520 --> 00:47:44,440
happy to move in that direction.
You can't beat live performing. 

1020
00:47:44,440 --> 00:47:46,360
You really can't. 
Like unless it goes shit then 

1021
00:47:46,360 --> 00:47:48,760
you really can. 
What like have you been heckled 

1022
00:47:48,760 --> 00:47:52,840
much? 
I feel like heckling was way 

1023
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:55,120
more of a thing before you 
started stand up. 

1024
00:47:55,120 --> 00:47:58,840
I think heckling becoming like 
let rowdiness in general is 

1025
00:47:58,840 --> 00:48:00,920
becoming like a bit like. 
People have a bit more 

1026
00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:03,360
respectful, yeah. 
I don't think I would do well 

1027
00:48:03,360 --> 00:48:04,920
with people heckling me. 
You don't. 

1028
00:48:05,160 --> 00:48:08,120
I think I'd be shit. 
But I, we, me and Kieran 

1029
00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:11,880
Bartlett did a gig for Dave and 
pugs like IS pre pandemic as 

1030
00:48:11,880 --> 00:48:13,960
well. 
And Dave wasn't there. 

1031
00:48:13,960 --> 00:48:16,880
Kieran was and was was it me and
Tom Mahoney? 

1032
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:18,840
Yeah. 
And Dave was like, I'm all sold 

1033
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:19,760
out. 
I'm not there the night, but 

1034
00:48:19,760 --> 00:48:21,560
it's it's sold out. 
And I was like, oh, happy days. 

1035
00:48:21,840 --> 00:48:23,760
And we went done and it wasn't 
sold out. 

1036
00:48:23,760 --> 00:48:27,640
There was about 15 to 20 people 
there. 6000. 

1037
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:30,280
It holds 6000 but they had hired
it out. 

1038
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:34,840
They were the fucking PSNI and 
that's why it was sold out and 

1039
00:48:34,920 --> 00:48:37,200
that's why Dave pied him fucking
turn up and. 

1040
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:39,400
They, like Dave, cannot be 
around cops. 

1041
00:48:39,400 --> 00:48:42,200
I don't want to go into too much
detail but they would have seen 

1042
00:48:42,200 --> 00:48:43,360
it in his eyes, you know what I 
mean? 

1043
00:48:43,360 --> 00:48:46,160
He was probably taking his hard 
drive to NIT store. 

1044
00:48:48,000 --> 00:48:50,560
But they ignored us the whole 
time they sat and had done her 

1045
00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:53,600
and turned her back away and 
Kieran Bartlett was such an 

1046
00:48:53,600 --> 00:48:55,440
angry man on stage. 
It's not like Kieran. 

1047
00:48:55,440 --> 00:48:59,680
Kieran's normally a jolly Funga.
He threatened to meet. 

1048
00:49:02,040 --> 00:49:07,000
Kieran Mcgavry that night, man. 
He was like I will RIP open your

1049
00:49:07,000 --> 00:49:10,400
souls like he was so annoyed at 
all them. 

1050
00:49:10,800 --> 00:49:12,720
He was like but uses would try 
and cover up and away your 

1051
00:49:12,720 --> 00:49:17,320
fucking pegs like the. 
Other night he told someone he 

1052
00:49:17,320 --> 00:49:19,120
was going to tarmac their mass 
back. 

1053
00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:27,080
What a threat. 
Oh well. 

1054
00:49:28,160 --> 00:49:29,800
Angry man. 
Yeah, there's definitely a big 

1055
00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:31,200
difference between corporate 
type stuff. 

1056
00:49:31,240 --> 00:49:32,560
Although some corpse can be 
really good. 

1057
00:49:32,560 --> 00:49:34,320
Like honestly, at International 
Women's Day gigs. 

1058
00:49:34,520 --> 00:49:36,840
That was good fun, my first gig 
in London next week. 

1059
00:49:37,200 --> 00:49:38,640
Oh yeah. 
For I've never gigged in 

1060
00:49:38,640 --> 00:49:40,400
England, you're. 
Going to play it different. 

1061
00:49:41,040 --> 00:49:43,360
I don't think, no, I don't think
so. 

1062
00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:46,640
I think I maybe have to just 
change some words. 

1063
00:49:46,720 --> 00:49:48,320
Yeah. 
I don't know what a dude does. 

1064
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:53,560
I don't think dude travels. 
I think I'll have to just find a

1065
00:49:53,560 --> 00:49:56,080
new word for dude because I do 
tend to say dude quite a bit. 

1066
00:49:56,200 --> 00:49:59,400
Dude, sounds like I guarantee 
you there's a tech startup 

1067
00:49:59,400 --> 00:50:02,760
company in London called. 
Dude, yeah. dude.com. 

1068
00:50:04,960 --> 00:50:06,640
Yeah. 
So I I'm in. 

1069
00:50:07,720 --> 00:50:10,360
Like definitely when you watch a
YouTube video, there's like an 

1070
00:50:10,360 --> 00:50:12,560
ad that comes up at the start. 
Weird dude. 

1071
00:50:12,840 --> 00:50:15,520
You know for sure they're dude. 
What do they do Dot? 

1072
00:50:15,520 --> 00:50:19,720
Co.uk what did what did do do 
sell remotes? 

1073
00:50:21,880 --> 00:50:27,280
Like all in one. 
Because oh, do do do universal 

1074
00:50:27,280 --> 00:50:29,080
remotes. 
That turns into a vibrator. 

1075
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:34,440
Is that not genius? 
I think they do. 

1076
00:50:34,920 --> 00:50:39,360
Hygienic like. 
I think do sell remotes for your

1077
00:50:39,360 --> 00:50:42,080
vape. 
Yeah, you don't even have to 

1078
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:43,840
press. 
That's so stupid. 

1079
00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:45,480
Yeah. 
So you're going to hold. 

1080
00:50:45,480 --> 00:50:46,360
Her. 
I don't think they're going to 

1081
00:50:46,360 --> 00:50:48,240
last as a company, but that's 
what they do. 

1082
00:50:48,240 --> 00:50:51,160
They'll fold and they'll reopen 
as did it. 

1083
00:50:51,160 --> 00:50:54,160
Who's their celebrity 
ambassador, Kerry Katona. 

1084
00:50:54,320 --> 00:50:55,560
No, Peter. 
Andre. 

1085
00:50:55,680 --> 00:50:59,440
What do you call her Kenga from 
Big Brother? 

1086
00:50:59,640 --> 00:51:02,400
It's of the wine bottle, Bridit.
Yeah, remember Kenga? 

1087
00:51:02,400 --> 00:51:03,120
Do you know? 
What? 

1088
00:51:03,120 --> 00:51:04,440
I was going to say hello 
whenever you're doing the 

1089
00:51:04,440 --> 00:51:06,360
manscaping thing. 
There was a girl on Big Brother 

1090
00:51:06,360 --> 00:51:08,000
1 time who used to tweeze her 
armpits. 

1091
00:51:08,680 --> 00:51:12,280
That's how she shouldn't shave. 
She she tweeze every individual 

1092
00:51:12,280 --> 00:51:14,840
hair out of her armpit. 
That must be someone who like is

1093
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:16,360
in the like pain. 
That's weird. 

1094
00:51:17,080 --> 00:51:18,600
Or just doesn't want to mess a 
hair. 

1095
00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:20,720
Yeah. 
Also, I'm sure your growth would

1096
00:51:20,720 --> 00:51:24,280
be you know it would last longer
if he tweezed it I but imagine. 

1097
00:51:24,920 --> 00:51:28,360
But if you do that stuff more 
growth back more and it comes 

1098
00:51:28,360 --> 00:51:33,160
back double. 
I heard people say that don't be

1099
00:51:33,280 --> 00:51:36,040
shaving in between your eyebrows
because it grows back way more. 

1100
00:51:36,040 --> 00:51:37,880
I I get a monobrow. 
Do you know that a lot of people

1101
00:51:37,880 --> 00:51:39,640
won't know a lot about me? 
It's bad at the minute. 

1102
00:51:39,640 --> 00:51:41,000
This the worst it's ever been in
a long time. 

1103
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:42,760
Don't look too closely at it. 
I pluck. 

1104
00:51:42,760 --> 00:51:46,440
It you should wax it. 
Here's why I wouldn't. 

1105
00:51:46,440 --> 00:51:49,360
I wouldn't like to be Midwax 
with the strip over it and then 

1106
00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:51,160
like a fire alarm goes off or 
something. 

1107
00:51:51,160 --> 00:51:53,240
I've got to be outside. 
Yeah, but then you could do 

1108
00:51:53,240 --> 00:51:54,080
that. 
It's like a plaster. 

1109
00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:56,440
But what if I forget? 
Then I'm like running about 

1110
00:51:56,440 --> 00:51:58,240
being like, where's the fire? 
And they're like, why do you 

1111
00:51:58,240 --> 00:51:59,960
have a strip like the whole way 
up and. 

1112
00:52:00,040 --> 00:52:01,680
You just live the rest of your 
life with. 

1113
00:52:01,720 --> 00:52:04,680
Just what if I wax it and then I
do one over too much side and 

1114
00:52:04,680 --> 00:52:06,800
then I'm like oh let me even 
write the others and then all of

1115
00:52:06,800 --> 00:52:10,040
a sudden I have no eyebrows. 
You'll you'll, I think you know 

1116
00:52:10,200 --> 00:52:14,040
right where your face is. 
And I think you're aware that 

1117
00:52:14,040 --> 00:52:16,000
here are the eyebrows and this 
is the part that should go. 

1118
00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:17,360
You'll be fine. 
Yeah. 

1119
00:52:18,200 --> 00:52:19,400
Practise. 
When I get my own kit, the. 

1120
00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,200
Plaster. 
Should I get my own waxing kit? 

1121
00:52:21,320 --> 00:52:23,440
I mean it's are you hire you 
with pain. 

1122
00:52:24,240 --> 00:52:26,640
Oh, not good. 
And will I maybe don't wax 

1123
00:52:26,640 --> 00:52:29,440
because it is sore? 
Although what have I had? 

1124
00:52:29,520 --> 00:52:32,480
Have I had some waxed? 
You're bound to have had us. 

1125
00:52:32,480 --> 00:52:34,840
Are we waxing well? 
You know, did not manscape and 

1126
00:52:34,840 --> 00:52:35,920
stuff. 
Yeah, that's. 

1127
00:52:36,280 --> 00:52:38,680
All. 
People go to Turkish barbers, 

1128
00:52:38,680 --> 00:52:40,920
get like they they'll wax you 
like without. 

1129
00:52:40,960 --> 00:52:42,760
Your permission. 
What? 

1130
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:46,680
Do men wax their dudes? 
I think you might there might be

1131
00:52:46,680 --> 00:52:48,040
a problem with the question 
there. 

1132
00:52:48,040 --> 00:52:52,240
Do men wax their dudes? 
Well, they're they're like the 

1133
00:52:52,240 --> 00:52:57,160
area in front of their deck. 
The area in front of the deck. 

1134
00:52:57,160 --> 00:53:02,320
Where their pubes live. 
Do they wax it? 

1135
00:53:02,720 --> 00:53:06,000
Some guys will, absolutely. 
Some guys will, yeah. 

1136
00:53:06,520 --> 00:53:10,000
But I think. 
It's not common practise. 

1137
00:53:10,280 --> 00:53:14,800
No, no. 
To have a shaved mandate or a 

1138
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:15,880
wax. 
Mandate. 

1139
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:19,360
Is he not one of the adventures?
He sounds like the man has 

1140
00:53:19,360 --> 00:53:21,680
started up the company. 
Some of the Indian man called 

1141
00:53:21,680 --> 00:53:29,680
Mandate. 
Uncle Andy does his IT support. 

1142
00:53:30,280 --> 00:53:32,280
I'm leaving Queens. 
Where are you away to? 

1143
00:53:35,680 --> 00:53:37,040
Mandate. 
It's a fucking great name. 

1144
00:53:37,720 --> 00:53:41,440
Man, dude is a great name. 
Yeah, you, you were out last 

1145
00:53:41,440 --> 00:53:42,480
night. 
I was. 

1146
00:53:42,480 --> 00:53:45,240
And I don't mean to sound like 
accusing, but I know you're 

1147
00:53:45,240 --> 00:53:49,840
right because someone you, you 
put up an Instagram story. 

1148
00:53:49,840 --> 00:53:52,520
But in the podcast today, I 
could, I could tell. 

1149
00:53:52,760 --> 00:53:54,160
I could. 
I was like, she's out. 

1150
00:53:54,760 --> 00:53:56,320
I could just tell. 
Because the tweeted said I. 

1151
00:53:56,400 --> 00:53:58,680
Was out, Yeah. 
Tweeted saying you were what? 

1152
00:53:58,800 --> 00:54:01,280
Gave it away. 
Was it the glass of wine in the 

1153
00:54:01,280 --> 00:54:01,880
bar? 
I was in the. 

1154
00:54:01,920 --> 00:54:05,960
Ice, right? 
And then someone, some random 

1155
00:54:05,960 --> 00:54:08,880
person Instagram me and went I 
think the owner is in the 

1156
00:54:08,880 --> 00:54:11,120
courthouse bar in Lurgan. 
Is that where you are? 

1157
00:54:11,120 --> 00:54:14,000
Yeah, there we go. 
I've got a little bar that's. 

1158
00:54:14,240 --> 00:54:15,760
Fucking weird about that. 
What? 

1159
00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:19,680
Nobody else was on that bar 
except for the staff and. 

1160
00:54:19,880 --> 00:54:21,520
You were out. 
Do you have a problem? 

1161
00:54:22,320 --> 00:54:23,880
There was no one else drinking 
in the Barber. 

1162
00:54:23,880 --> 00:54:26,640
The person I was with, me and my
friend Susanna, who, you know, 

1163
00:54:26,640 --> 00:54:28,000
we went without drinking in that
bar. 

1164
00:54:28,240 --> 00:54:30,880
But here, it was so weird 
because anytime she would leave 

1165
00:54:30,880 --> 00:54:33,240
to go to the toilet, there was 
no staff on. 

1166
00:54:33,240 --> 00:54:35,520
Like, there was a guy working 
there, but he would, like, head 

1167
00:54:35,520 --> 00:54:38,040
on in between rounds. 
We were the only people drinking

1168
00:54:38,040 --> 00:54:39,960
in that bar, Right. 
So when she left to go to the 

1169
00:54:39,960 --> 00:54:43,200
toilet, it would be just me in 
the building. 

1170
00:54:43,400 --> 00:54:45,280
Get you. 
There's nobody behind the bar, 

1171
00:54:45,360 --> 00:54:47,320
nobody else drinking. 
And I would just be sat there 

1172
00:54:47,320 --> 00:54:49,240
going. 
I'm probably about to get 

1173
00:54:49,240 --> 00:54:50,160
murdered. 
Yeah. 

1174
00:54:50,280 --> 00:54:53,160
This is the start of something. 
Yeah, but it was great. 

1175
00:54:53,280 --> 00:54:55,040
What's the nightlife like in 
Logan be? 

1176
00:54:55,320 --> 00:54:58,760
Quiet Thursday night does not 
happen on a Thursday night, 

1177
00:54:58,760 --> 00:55:00,240
don't I? 
I, I came out and there was 

1178
00:55:00,240 --> 00:55:02,080
nobody and that's also a live 
music on the night and they 

1179
00:55:02,080 --> 00:55:03,840
would like to take a look around
mate, no one's here do. 

1180
00:55:03,840 --> 00:55:05,480
You know what I would have done 
in that situation? 

1181
00:55:05,520 --> 00:55:07,840
Or can I connect my phone up to 
something we plug in? 

1182
00:55:07,840 --> 00:55:10,080
And then you could have been in 
a bar with your own music plan. 

1183
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:12,360
I had to put my own podcast. 
That's just like, that's like 

1184
00:55:12,360 --> 00:55:14,120
your house you may just be in. 
Your house. 

1185
00:55:14,120 --> 00:55:15,760
You can do that You. 
Can do that in your house too, 

1186
00:55:15,800 --> 00:55:16,480
can't you? 
Forgot? 

1187
00:55:16,560 --> 00:55:18,400
Yeah, just Alexa play whatever 
it is. 

1188
00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:21,800
The courthouse bar in Logan, 
Your husband put me for a gig 

1189
00:55:21,800 --> 00:55:27,160
there year, like we're talking 
12 years ago, and it was good. 

1190
00:55:27,280 --> 00:55:30,440
Like then it was not going well.
Like nobody was having a good 

1191
00:55:30,440 --> 00:55:33,680
set. 
I went up and I was like, I'm 

1192
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:35,920
going to try and like get them 
and nobody was listened. 

1193
00:55:35,920 --> 00:55:37,520
That's a problem. 
It wasn't that they weren't 

1194
00:55:37,520 --> 00:55:40,440
enjoying it. 
They just worked a bit like 

1195
00:55:40,440 --> 00:55:42,200
you're saying about that private
gig and pokes. 

1196
00:55:42,880 --> 00:55:44,160
They're just talking amongst 
themselves. 

1197
00:55:44,160 --> 00:55:47,040
No one's listening. 
Plus, it's not a function room, 

1198
00:55:47,720 --> 00:55:50,480
it's the main bar. 
So people are like, why came out

1199
00:55:50,480 --> 00:55:51,280
for a pint? 
Roommate? 

1200
00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:54,640
I'm not fucking listen to you. 
So I go up, I'm like probably 

1201
00:55:54,640 --> 00:55:57,440
like 19 or 20. 
I'm like, I'm gonna get them. 

1202
00:55:57,640 --> 00:56:01,400
And I go up on stage. 
I go up and someone's like, is 

1203
00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:03,600
there a Zumba class starting? 
What's his home do? 

1204
00:56:04,000 --> 00:56:07,120
But I go up, get the microphone 
and I'm like, I'm doing the 

1205
00:56:07,120 --> 00:56:09,400
jokes. 
And after about one or two 

1206
00:56:09,400 --> 00:56:12,480
minutes, I notice everyone's a 
bit quieter and they're looking 

1207
00:56:12,480 --> 00:56:14,280
at me. 
And I was like, well, fucking. 

1208
00:56:14,280 --> 00:56:17,120
They're not laughing, but I've 
got their attention. 

1209
00:56:17,640 --> 00:56:20,840
Everyone's all these men, like, 
literally set their pints down. 

1210
00:56:20,840 --> 00:56:22,680
They're, like nudging each 
other, like, pointing at me. 

1211
00:56:22,680 --> 00:56:25,280
And I was like, fuck, I'm like, 
I'm getting through to them. 

1212
00:56:25,280 --> 00:56:27,040
They're listening. 
I've turned the crowd around. 

1213
00:56:27,040 --> 00:56:31,320
Yeah, what happened was the bar 
man had put on Match of the Day 

1214
00:56:31,320 --> 00:56:33,520
on the big screen behind me, but
muted it. 

1215
00:56:33,720 --> 00:56:36,040
So everyone's just watching the 
highlights like, you know, Man 

1216
00:56:36,040 --> 00:56:38,320
United, Aston Villa, like 
looking up with that being like,

1217
00:56:38,320 --> 00:56:39,120
I was some shot. 
No. 

1218
00:56:39,320 --> 00:56:41,360
And I think they're like, fuck, 
they love this. 

1219
00:56:41,360 --> 00:56:42,360
They love what I'm doing, 
everything. 

1220
00:56:42,440 --> 00:56:43,960
And then I just turned around 
and sort of watching. 

1221
00:56:44,200 --> 00:56:47,240
Come here, that would be a great
quote for like your poster for a

1222
00:56:47,240 --> 00:56:48,880
gig. 
Be like, they weren't laughing, 

1223
00:56:48,920 --> 00:56:51,760
but I got their attention. 
They were looking, they were 

1224
00:56:51,760 --> 00:56:53,880
watching. 
Yeah, when I took out my mom. 

1225
00:56:54,280 --> 00:56:57,280
They were looking in my 
direction for the for the 

1226
00:56:57,280 --> 00:56:58,720
duration. 
What else do you think you're 

1227
00:56:58,720 --> 00:57:00,040
not going to be able to say in 
London? 

1228
00:57:01,360 --> 00:57:05,440
And Brett's out. 
Yeah, yeah. 

1229
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:07,720
Unless they think it's part of 
the Free Britney movement. 

1230
00:57:07,720 --> 00:57:09,000
Which case? 
Yeah, sister. 

1231
00:57:09,000 --> 00:57:12,440
Get Brett out. 
Yeah, I think I'll have to hold 

1232
00:57:12,440 --> 00:57:15,640
back on that. 
People always like other stand 

1233
00:57:15,640 --> 00:57:17,600
up crowd your head with stuff. 
If you're like I'm going to 

1234
00:57:17,600 --> 00:57:21,160
London any types to be like 
don't speak in your own accent. 

1235
00:57:21,280 --> 00:57:26,080
Slow down and do like wear red 
jumper. 

1236
00:57:26,160 --> 00:57:27,960
They'll be like, there's too 
much information. 

1237
00:57:28,240 --> 00:57:30,160
Yeah, just too specific 
information. 

1238
00:57:30,160 --> 00:57:31,640
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 
But you definitely like. 

1239
00:57:32,120 --> 00:57:33,960
I don't do what I'm going to 
have to go through my set and 

1240
00:57:33,960 --> 00:57:37,760
just because and and go what? 
And that is too localised 

1241
00:57:37,760 --> 00:57:39,040
Germany. 
I probably can't talk about 

1242
00:57:39,040 --> 00:57:41,120
Frank Mitchell. 
Not that I do. 

1243
00:57:41,240 --> 00:57:42,920
I don't talk. 
About him, Well, they know Frank

1244
00:57:42,920 --> 00:57:44,360
don't know Frank. 
How else do they get their 

1245
00:57:44,360 --> 00:57:50,400
weather information? 
Exactly, I am did a gig away and

1246
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:53,120
I was like gigs in America. 
I was like, I'm not going to 

1247
00:57:53,120 --> 00:57:55,200
change, like my voice, like I'm 
not going to slow down. 

1248
00:57:55,200 --> 00:57:57,760
I'm just going to do because 
I've I've been doing it like 

1249
00:57:57,760 --> 00:58:01,120
this for so long. 
I don't want to do different and

1250
00:58:01,240 --> 00:58:03,520
did this gig in New York and it 
was lovely. 

1251
00:58:03,520 --> 00:58:06,480
It was really good. 
And after this woman came up, 

1252
00:58:06,480 --> 00:58:09,120
like older sort of woman came up
and she went she was like, she's

1253
00:58:09,120 --> 00:58:11,320
American. 
She was like, I just want to say

1254
00:58:11,320 --> 00:58:12,880
I love that. 
That was so good. 

1255
00:58:12,880 --> 00:58:14,120
And I said, Oh, thanks very 
much. 

1256
00:58:14,120 --> 00:58:15,880
And she went a bit like the 
call, you know, getting a 

1257
00:58:15,880 --> 00:58:17,320
compliment. 
Like I didn't think herds could 

1258
00:58:17,320 --> 00:58:19,440
be funny. 
She came up to me and said she 

1259
00:58:19,440 --> 00:58:20,920
goes him. 
I was very good. 

1260
00:58:20,920 --> 00:58:21,520
I loved that. 
She goes. 

1261
00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:23,240
I didn't. 
I'll be honest, me and my 

1262
00:58:23,240 --> 00:58:26,920
friend, we didn't understand 
really anything that you were 

1263
00:58:26,920 --> 00:58:29,080
saying. 
But she said, but I understood 

1264
00:58:29,080 --> 00:58:30,000
it. 
It would be funny. 

1265
00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:33,360
I was like, well. 
That's lovely. 

1266
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:34,880
Fuck you. 
And she was like, and you too. 

1267
00:58:35,080 --> 00:58:37,320
She's like, yeah, you have a 
good night too. 

1268
00:58:37,400 --> 00:58:41,080
I didn't say that. 
I don't think you can like slow 

1269
00:58:41,080 --> 00:58:42,320
down. 
I couldn't slow down when I'm 

1270
00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:43,440
talking. 
I'm probably going to have to 

1271
00:58:43,440 --> 00:58:45,600
slow down a wee bit in London 
because they definitely. 

1272
00:58:45,600 --> 00:58:47,680
Won't you? 
You do speak very. 

1273
00:58:47,680 --> 00:58:50,240
Fast. 
Do you know what Jamie Lee 

1274
00:58:50,240 --> 00:58:52,920
O'Donnell and I recently were 
shooting the thing for Channel 4

1275
00:58:53,120 --> 00:58:59,000
and Derry and we just had a sit 
and chat and holy shit, when 2 

1276
00:58:59,000 --> 00:59:01,840
Derry people are in the same 
room together you go 90 fucking 

1277
00:59:01,840 --> 00:59:04,560
miles an hour. 
And the director was from Dublin

1278
00:59:04,560 --> 00:59:05,600
and I was having a step and go 
here. 

1279
00:59:05,600 --> 00:59:08,200
There's fucking nobody knows 
what usings are saying. 

1280
00:59:08,200 --> 00:59:11,200
Yeah, I mean her both were like 
we have intentionally slowed 

1281
00:59:11,200 --> 00:59:15,320
down and they were like no user 
like and even like if I come off

1282
00:59:15,320 --> 00:59:17,240
the phone, I called one day 
Sean, and if I'm talking really 

1283
00:59:17,240 --> 00:59:19,880
fast, I'd like to be on the 
phone, dear man, because you 

1284
00:59:19,880 --> 00:59:21,960
just start getting far faster. 
But you can get way more 

1285
00:59:21,960 --> 00:59:24,400
information and it's like I 
listen to voice notes now on 2 

1286
00:59:24,400 --> 00:59:25,960
speed. 
Do you Can you take? 

1287
00:59:26,000 --> 00:59:28,120
This one from Derry. 
Oh yeah, it will change your 

1288
00:59:28,120 --> 00:59:30,960
life, you get. 
Here's the thing, I hate voice 

1289
00:59:30,960 --> 00:59:32,200
notes. 
See, I love for them. 

1290
00:59:32,560 --> 00:59:34,800
Really. 
For my podcasts. 

1291
00:59:34,960 --> 00:59:38,040
Right, I hate it, but now you 
double speed right all the 

1292
00:59:38,040 --> 00:59:40,200
information and save twice a 
time. 

1293
00:59:40,440 --> 00:59:41,760
I sent you a voice note the 
other day. 

1294
00:59:42,160 --> 00:59:44,200
And I tried to listen to it in 2
speed and it was just. 

1295
00:59:47,600 --> 00:59:49,480
She did. 
I don't know about a voice note 

1296
00:59:49,480 --> 00:59:50,400
now. 
See. 

1297
00:59:50,720 --> 00:59:52,720
I hate a phone call. 
Well, that's that's why it's a 

1298
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:56,200
compromise from a phone call, 
because I like my brother's one 

1299
00:59:56,200 --> 00:59:59,040
of people that you text and he 
phoned you and you're like, how 

1300
00:59:59,440 --> 01:00:01,520
dare. 
You you've established you only 

1301
01:00:01,520 --> 01:00:02,840
want to text. 
This is the form of 

1302
01:00:02,840 --> 01:00:05,480
communication. 
Don't fucking ring me you creep.

1303
01:00:05,480 --> 01:00:08,880
Was your brother 73? 
No, I'll just give you a ring. 

1304
01:00:09,080 --> 01:00:10,600
No, we've established he's only 
two years older. 

1305
01:00:12,120 --> 01:00:14,920
Yeah, he'll phone. 
He'll phone and also what he 

1306
01:00:14,920 --> 01:00:19,440
does is he phones sometimes just
to say hi and you're like what 

1307
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:21,480
the fuck is this? 
So weird. 

1308
01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:24,360
He likes people that much that 
you want to just. 

1309
01:00:24,360 --> 01:00:27,240
Say checking in. 
Just checking in is the man with

1310
01:00:27,240 --> 01:00:30,680
a very busy job and three 
children and a dog and he'll 

1311
01:00:30,680 --> 01:00:33,480
ring me and be all hi are you? 
And I'll be like, how do you 

1312
01:00:33,480 --> 01:00:36,520
have time to give a shit? 
Yeah, like I hate that. 

1313
01:00:36,520 --> 01:00:39,040
Just don't ring me just to see 
how I like. 

1314
01:00:39,040 --> 01:00:42,080
I like the sentiment but like 
make something up. 

1315
01:00:42,360 --> 01:00:43,840
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 
You know, accuse me of 

1316
01:00:43,840 --> 01:00:45,480
something. 
Yeah. 

1317
01:00:48,480 --> 01:00:52,880
Did you knock down my dog? 
Like just start I I but. 

1318
01:00:52,880 --> 01:00:54,000
What was that you were filming? 
A dairy? 

1319
01:00:54,080 --> 01:00:56,920
Are you allowed to say? 
It's a documentary about dairy. 

1320
01:00:57,040 --> 01:00:58,880
Oh nice. 
To coincide with the release of 

1321
01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:02,240
the next series of Dairy Girls 
class, but I'm not on anything 

1322
01:01:02,240 --> 01:01:04,240
but. 
Another my audition thing. 

1323
01:01:05,120 --> 01:01:06,880
Did you? 
Because I heard you saying you 

1324
01:01:06,880 --> 01:01:08,480
auditioned before, but did you 
actually audition? 

1325
01:01:08,600 --> 01:01:09,920
Do you do many auditions? 
Yes. 

1326
01:01:10,200 --> 01:01:11,840
Do you and? 
I don't get any of them. 

1327
01:01:12,320 --> 01:01:14,320
What's the? 
Addition for a sci-fi thing 

1328
01:01:14,320 --> 01:01:17,800
called Krypton 98 times. 
Do you mean like, is that not I?

1329
01:01:17,960 --> 01:01:19,600
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 
The Superman thing, yeah. 

1330
01:01:19,640 --> 01:01:22,280
Yeah, why would they not have 
just said you're not for us? 

1331
01:01:22,280 --> 01:01:24,880
I kept going in and bringing. 
In for male parts or female 

1332
01:01:24,920 --> 01:01:27,920
parts both. 
I would learn, I would learn 10 

1333
01:01:27,920 --> 01:01:30,200
pages of line. 
So I'm like in my head all day. 

1334
01:01:30,200 --> 01:01:31,640
I'm like, someone's like, how 
are you? 

1335
01:01:31,640 --> 01:01:34,160
I'm like, I can't speak. 
I was like, I have to go to the 

1336
01:01:34,680 --> 01:01:38,440
faraway planet of Chiba Chaba, 
you know, all that shit. 

1337
01:01:38,440 --> 01:01:41,600
That's probably why I didn't get
it was in the voice, but I kept 

1338
01:01:41,600 --> 01:01:42,640
going in. 
They were like, they love you. 

1339
01:01:42,920 --> 01:01:45,400
They just, it's going to be the 
right part, Don't worry, we're 

1340
01:01:45,400 --> 01:01:47,160
going to find it. 
It was never found. 

1341
01:01:47,160 --> 01:01:48,440
And then they cancelled the 
series. 

1342
01:01:48,440 --> 01:01:51,520
I was like, I'd fund the new 
series of this to be made just 

1343
01:01:51,560 --> 01:01:53,320
to, yeah, spite them, to get me 
into the. 

1344
01:01:53,320 --> 01:01:54,480
Exact same. 
I got maybe Krypton. 

1345
01:01:54,480 --> 01:01:56,280
I kept going to stone casting 
that kept going back out and 

1346
01:01:56,280 --> 01:01:58,000
kept going back in. 
And they were actually bringing 

1347
01:01:58,000 --> 01:02:00,520
me in for men parts too, right, 
Soldiers that were meant to be 

1348
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:01,960
men. 
And then they were like you 

1349
01:02:02,040 --> 01:02:05,200
tall, like come on in. 
And I was like, this is meant to

1350
01:02:05,200 --> 01:02:06,320
be a guy. 
And they were like, we're going 

1351
01:02:06,320 --> 01:02:08,040
to just chance their arms. 
I was like, no wonder not 

1352
01:02:08,040 --> 01:02:09,760
getting these fucking parts. 
Yeah, Mandate. 

1353
01:02:09,840 --> 01:02:12,560
Yeah. 
That's one of the planets in 

1354
01:02:12,560 --> 01:02:15,160
crypto. 
But I remember auditioning for 

1355
01:02:15,160 --> 01:02:18,720
Doctors to the TV show Doctors, 
but I had to learn the whole 

1356
01:02:18,720 --> 01:02:20,840
episode. 
No it. 

1357
01:02:20,840 --> 01:02:23,320
Was like 28 pages of script and 
I was like this I'm so. 

1358
01:02:23,320 --> 01:02:24,560
Bad at learning? 
Ridiculous. 

1359
01:02:24,560 --> 01:02:26,040
Like yeah. 
And I was like, surely you can 

1360
01:02:26,040 --> 01:02:29,240
tell 3 or 4 pages then if you're
going to have me, like if you 

1361
01:02:29,240 --> 01:02:31,760
want me or not. 
How do you fly over and do the 

1362
01:02:31,800 --> 01:02:35,000
whole episode? 
Now I hear that where off book. 

1363
01:02:35,560 --> 01:02:37,760
Off book. 
Well, that's the thing. 

1364
01:02:37,960 --> 01:02:40,480
The first time I auditioned for 
Derry girls, I've told this 

1365
01:02:40,480 --> 01:02:43,680
story. 
They said we want you off book 

1366
01:02:43,680 --> 01:02:45,960
and I'd never auditioned for 
anything in my life. 

1367
01:02:46,200 --> 01:02:48,960
And I went, oh, happy days off 
book. 

1368
01:02:49,360 --> 01:02:52,160
I can read off the book. 
So I show up and they're like, 

1369
01:02:52,400 --> 01:02:55,160
OK, here we go. 
And I'm like, Yep, they'll omit 

1370
01:02:55,240 --> 01:02:58,680
and and then do it like this and
they correspond. 

1371
01:02:58,680 --> 01:03:00,760
They were like the fucking 
soundest people in the world. 

1372
01:03:00,760 --> 01:03:04,760
They were like we have a busy 
day, but go away and learn this 

1373
01:03:04,760 --> 01:03:07,560
and we can fit in somewhere 
later on and come back, which 

1374
01:03:07,560 --> 01:03:10,360
they absolutely didn't have to 
do went away like learned it, 

1375
01:03:10,360 --> 01:03:12,800
but like I don't have the tech. 
I'm sure there's a technique for

1376
01:03:12,800 --> 01:03:13,960
learning. 
Everyone has a different 

1377
01:03:13,960 --> 01:03:14,960
technique. 
I figure mind. 

1378
01:03:14,960 --> 01:03:18,680
So I struggled to learn lines 
and so I but I additionally for 

1379
01:03:18,680 --> 01:03:22,080
the recent series of Derry girls
and like I I don't know, I don't

1380
01:03:22,080 --> 01:03:25,440
know whether it's I don't know 
if I can get comfortable just 

1381
01:03:25,440 --> 01:03:27,560
doing a bit 2 camera with no 
audience there. 

1382
01:03:27,720 --> 01:03:30,320
I think I'm still working that 
out, but I thought the addition 

1383
01:03:30,320 --> 01:03:32,720
was I thought it was OK. 
I thought Derry accent which I 

1384
01:03:32,720 --> 01:03:34,840
thought was decent. 
What is your dairy accent like? 

1385
01:03:35,000 --> 01:03:38,040
I was like, it's. 
Hard to do. 

1386
01:03:38,120 --> 01:03:40,520
I was like, oh, what's the crack
with you? 

1387
01:03:41,640 --> 01:03:43,920
I'm from Darii. 
Via Monaghan. 

1388
01:03:44,880 --> 01:03:47,120
No, I I'm not going to do it. 
Obviously that's that's an 

1389
01:03:47,120 --> 01:03:48,320
embarrassment that I couldn't do
it. 

1390
01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:51,960
In front of you, some auditions 
are so wanky, and they're 

1391
01:03:51,960 --> 01:03:54,040
usually for theatre ones that 
are so wanky. 

1392
01:03:54,320 --> 01:03:56,440
Like I remember doing an 
audition on time, right? 

1393
01:03:56,440 --> 01:03:58,600
And the director, so dad, the 
audition and then the director 

1394
01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:01,000
was like just, she was like, so 
let's do it again. 

1395
01:04:01,840 --> 01:04:05,960
At this time, after every 
sentence, you're going to have a

1396
01:04:05,960 --> 01:04:09,920
new, a different childhood 
memory pop into your head and 

1397
01:04:09,920 --> 01:04:11,640
you're going to be able to smell
it. 

1398
01:04:12,880 --> 01:04:16,760
And that was the direction. 
And I let you, it was all, hello

1399
01:04:16,760 --> 01:04:23,160
mum. 
I'm walking down the the road 

1400
01:04:23,160 --> 01:04:27,480
and I can't wait. 
I just go through all that and I

1401
01:04:27,480 --> 01:04:30,680
said what is this achievement? 
And I was like, I'd rather be a 

1402
01:04:30,680 --> 01:04:32,880
bag of sand. 
Today than do this. 

1403
01:04:33,080 --> 01:04:35,600
Like it was fucking wanky. 
And I auditioned the same 

1404
01:04:35,600 --> 01:04:38,840
director another time and she 
made me redo it. 

1405
01:04:39,040 --> 01:04:42,120
And this time you really fancy 
him. 

1406
01:04:42,160 --> 01:04:45,000
And it was like the guy that's 
like we camp man who was like 

1407
01:04:45,160 --> 01:04:46,520
the theatre. 
My audition. 

1408
01:04:49,680 --> 01:04:52,120
Yeah, this weekend, man who 
like, he's like the theatre 

1409
01:04:52,120 --> 01:04:53,800
programmer and she's like, you 
really fancy him. 

1410
01:04:53,800 --> 01:04:55,720
I like. 
But the monologue that the bit 

1411
01:04:55,720 --> 01:04:58,320
that I'm doing is about she 
wants to go on a date, she can't

1412
01:04:58,320 --> 01:05:00,560
stop eating burgers, whatever. 
And she's like, yeah, yeah, but 

1413
01:05:00,560 --> 01:05:02,920
dude, sexy. 
And I was like, I have not got 

1414
01:05:02,920 --> 01:05:05,520
the capacity to do that. 
And I was like on the table 

1415
01:05:05,520 --> 01:05:08,680
claim all of this. 
We gay man all was want to stop 

1416
01:05:08,680 --> 01:05:12,120
eating burgers and I was like it
was the worst and I was like 

1417
01:05:12,120 --> 01:05:14,400
what the fuck is this and I 
genuinely after I'm going I 

1418
01:05:14,440 --> 01:05:16,720
think they were just bored that.
Day, yeah. 

1419
01:05:16,720 --> 01:05:18,720
And we're like, yeah. 
Let's just make her like, dance,

1420
01:05:18,720 --> 01:05:21,760
monkey fucking dance, yeah. 
And some of them are so wanky. 

1421
01:05:21,800 --> 01:05:25,680
Yeah, I enjoy I I enjoyed that 
the Derricker's edition would 

1422
01:05:25,680 --> 01:05:28,320
want to actually enjoy doing. 
And I was like, I think even 

1423
01:05:28,320 --> 01:05:30,240
though I didn't get it, I was 
like, I think this is a good 

1424
01:05:30,240 --> 01:05:33,440
audition to. 
But I I also asked Jimmy Lee, 

1425
01:05:33,440 --> 01:05:37,480
which was here in the podcast. 
I was like, listen, I was like, 

1426
01:05:37,480 --> 01:05:40,920
I, I, I did this audition and I 
think it went quite well, but it

1427
01:05:40,920 --> 01:05:43,240
was a couple of weeks ago and I 
haven't heard anything. 

1428
01:05:43,240 --> 01:05:44,960
But like, have you heard 
anything? 

1429
01:05:44,960 --> 01:05:47,280
Like, could you find out? 
And she's like, I don't think 

1430
01:05:47,280 --> 01:05:48,680
you've got it. 
And I was like, oh shit, what 

1431
01:05:48,680 --> 01:05:50,200
makes you think that? 
Just the vibe you're getting. 

1432
01:05:50,200 --> 01:05:51,600
She's like, we filmed that 
scene. 

1433
01:05:51,600 --> 01:05:55,120
A different actor has done that 
scene. 

1434
01:05:55,120 --> 01:05:57,320
Yeah, I used to find out I 
didn't get parts as well when 

1435
01:05:57,320 --> 01:05:58,200
things were on TV. 
Yeah. 

1436
01:05:59,040 --> 01:06:00,120
But there they are. 
There you are. 

1437
01:06:00,400 --> 01:06:02,760
And like, I have a sick 
fascination with finding out who

1438
01:06:02,760 --> 01:06:04,840
got the parts I didn't get. 
I need to get on. 

1439
01:06:04,840 --> 01:06:07,440
I'm on Google like I'll for 
something like 2 years ago in a 

1440
01:06:07,440 --> 01:06:09,360
pop in my head and I'll be over 
that fucking audition. 

1441
01:06:09,520 --> 01:06:10,840
Then I go lock it up and find if
you got it. 

1442
01:06:10,840 --> 01:06:12,200
And then I'd be like, that's all
right. 

1443
01:06:12,200 --> 01:06:14,400
They're very different to me. 
That's why I didn't get it, 

1444
01:06:14,440 --> 01:06:17,920
because I don't look. 
The parts I don't get Tilda 

1445
01:06:17,920 --> 01:06:21,920
Swinton mainly get some. 
Yes, that's perfect, but then 

1446
01:06:21,920 --> 01:06:24,600
that means because she's very 
likely that you just weren't 

1447
01:06:24,600 --> 01:06:26,720
good enough. 
Yeah, well, not as good as Tilda

1448
01:06:26,720 --> 01:06:28,800
Swinton. 
Do you have any ambition to do 

1449
01:06:28,800 --> 01:06:33,280
dramatic acting? 
Yeah, but then I'm like, yes, I 

1450
01:06:33,280 --> 01:06:36,480
would like to, I think I could 
be good at it, but I would need 

1451
01:06:36,480 --> 01:06:39,560
to like kind of be taught or get
experience in it. 

1452
01:06:39,920 --> 01:06:44,040
But not that long ago I I got 
the chance to addition or 

1453
01:06:44,040 --> 01:06:46,680
something like massive like it 
would have been unreal. 

1454
01:06:46,680 --> 01:06:49,480
Can't say what it is. 
Mike, do you remember what it? 

1455
01:06:50,280 --> 01:06:52,760
Was Tom and Jerry. 
Dungeons and Dragons. 

1456
01:06:52,840 --> 01:06:58,720
Oh, Dungeons and Dragons. 
Right, so the the part is I'm 

1457
01:06:58,720 --> 01:07:01,880
talking myself out of anything 
else in the future, right. 

1458
01:07:02,640 --> 01:07:05,880
The part is, you know, I'm 
playing like a soldier type 

1459
01:07:05,880 --> 01:07:07,120
fantasy. 
I don't know what dungeon 

1460
01:07:07,120 --> 01:07:09,560
Dragons is. 
I'm playing like a fantasy 

1461
01:07:09,560 --> 01:07:14,600
fucking sci-fi boy guy. 
And all I had to do is like say 

1462
01:07:14,600 --> 01:07:18,080
a line like something like 
getaway from the bridge for 

1463
01:07:18,080 --> 01:07:22,880
toxic and then I have to swing a
hammer and break a rock, right. 

1464
01:07:23,240 --> 01:07:27,240
But I think like my acting and 
stuff we do like sketches or 

1465
01:07:27,240 --> 01:07:29,640
anything, I can keep it like 
quite natural, like quite low 

1466
01:07:29,640 --> 01:07:31,560
key. 
But when it comes to like a 

1467
01:07:31,560 --> 01:07:35,120
grand thing, like a big 
production, I take my like 

1468
01:07:35,120 --> 01:07:38,520
because I think I'm like, I try 
and take my intensity up, but I 

1469
01:07:38,520 --> 01:07:40,520
should just do what I normally 
do. 

1470
01:07:40,760 --> 01:07:44,880
So the line is something like 
get off the bridge and then 

1471
01:07:44,880 --> 01:07:47,640
there's a I'm supposed to swing 
an axe and break a rock. 

1472
01:07:48,040 --> 01:07:51,480
But I try and be like, I don't 
know. 

1473
01:07:51,480 --> 01:07:53,000
That's why I like I look at the 
camera. 

1474
01:07:53,000 --> 01:07:57,160
He's felt we did it in here and 
I'm like, get off the bridge. 

1475
01:07:58,800 --> 01:08:01,280
I'm like, leave it up here and 
really try and flex my triceps. 

1476
01:08:02,200 --> 01:08:04,720
Like I'm always like, I always 
look like it's raining. 

1477
01:08:04,840 --> 01:08:06,320
And I was I've just done my 
hair. 

1478
01:08:06,400 --> 01:08:12,120
I'm like, and then I swing the 
axe and I'm like, I'm always out

1479
01:08:12,120 --> 01:08:14,400
of breath too when I do it. 
Like even in the Derrick Gardens

1480
01:08:14,400 --> 01:08:16,319
edition, I was probably like, 
ah, what's a crack? 

1481
01:08:16,319 --> 01:08:19,240
Hey. 
But then that's interesting 

1482
01:08:19,240 --> 01:08:21,560
because it's like he's just been
on a run or he's just been 

1483
01:08:21,560 --> 01:08:23,960
cycling like you've you've, 
you've created a back story. 

1484
01:08:23,960 --> 01:08:25,720
With Yeah. 
And I so he didn't get that 

1485
01:08:25,720 --> 01:08:26,920
part, no. 
No. 

1486
01:08:26,920 --> 01:08:29,319
Well, I don't know. 
Fingers crossed the film's 

1487
01:08:29,319 --> 01:08:31,279
finished, but you never know. 
Well. 

1488
01:08:31,640 --> 01:08:32,479
No, I don't. 
Think you do know? 

1489
01:08:32,720 --> 01:08:34,520
Was it just for one line? 
Yeah. 

1490
01:08:35,560 --> 01:08:37,920
Fair play to you for doing. 
That but then I here's how I've 

1491
01:08:37,920 --> 01:08:39,800
right here's how I've 
rationalised all this stuff, 

1492
01:08:39,800 --> 01:08:41,600
right? 
Just to make myself feel good 

1493
01:08:41,600 --> 01:08:43,439
about not getting anything I 
auditioned for. 

1494
01:08:43,800 --> 01:08:45,399
I've got two things I've ever 
auditioned for it. 

1495
01:08:46,080 --> 01:08:48,080
I want him Dave made. 
So that's probably because he's 

1496
01:08:48,080 --> 01:08:52,120
my best mate to give me. 
But I think part of it is here. 

1497
01:08:52,160 --> 01:08:55,439
This isn't what it is. 
But I tell myself this, they 

1498
01:08:55,439 --> 01:08:59,319
this is so embarrassing. 
I think the casting agents look 

1499
01:08:59,319 --> 01:09:03,840
at me in the thing and go, 
people just know him like his 

1500
01:09:03,840 --> 01:09:06,399
Mike McGoldrick and all. 
You know, they can't. 

1501
01:09:06,399 --> 01:09:10,120
We can't put him in Dungeons and
Dragons, the major worldwide 

1502
01:09:10,120 --> 01:09:12,120
motion picture. 
Because in Bolivia, they'll 

1503
01:09:12,120 --> 01:09:14,319
know. 
In the cinemas in Pakistan, 

1504
01:09:14,319 --> 01:09:16,279
they're going to look at him and
go flip Sagars. 

1505
01:09:16,279 --> 01:09:19,439
Keith Cruz. 
Also, the fact that you called 

1506
01:09:19,439 --> 01:09:21,319
him a casting agent is probably 
why they're not booking you. 

1507
01:09:21,319 --> 01:09:23,080
Casting director. 
Yeah, they hate being called 

1508
01:09:23,080 --> 01:09:25,399
casting agents shit. 
Because I always show up and say

1509
01:09:25,399 --> 01:09:27,760
hello casting agent, hello, 
hello casting agent, hello 

1510
01:09:27,760 --> 01:09:29,479
casting. 
Agent Well, I went to a casting 

1511
01:09:29,479 --> 01:09:32,439
director before did the audition
and was leaving the room. 

1512
01:09:33,080 --> 01:09:35,080
So sometimes you go on and the 
casting director isn't there and

1513
01:09:35,080 --> 01:09:37,080
it's their assistant and all 
this is pretty fucking self 

1514
01:09:37,080 --> 01:09:38,479
tabier. 
And they would like the 

1515
01:09:38,520 --> 01:09:41,040
assistant would film it for you 
and the cast would be in the 

1516
01:09:41,040 --> 01:09:42,600
room, but they'd watch the video
afterwards. 

1517
01:09:42,760 --> 01:09:44,920
So I assume this was the casting
directors assistant. 

1518
01:09:45,080 --> 01:09:46,840
And as I was leaving as well. 
Thanks very much for that there.

1519
01:09:46,840 --> 01:09:48,720
What's your name again? 
And then she said her name and 

1520
01:09:48,720 --> 01:09:51,520
as well, yeah, you're the 
fucking you're you're the big 

1521
01:09:51,560 --> 01:09:53,760
dog. 
You own this shit. 

1522
01:09:53,760 --> 01:09:55,960
And as I leave going well, I'm 
not going to fucking get that 

1523
01:09:55,960 --> 01:09:57,560
part, am I? 
And it doesn't, yeah. 

1524
01:09:59,040 --> 01:10:02,720
Yeah, I just have an intensity 
for additions that I don't need.

1525
01:10:03,200 --> 01:10:06,080
And also at this, if anyone does
know like at the start of 

1526
01:10:06,080 --> 01:10:08,800
edition you give your name, who 
you're represented by and a lot 

1527
01:10:08,800 --> 01:10:12,640
of times you're height. 
But I always in not try and like

1528
01:10:12,680 --> 01:10:15,520
almost like perform a bit 
instead of just saying it. 

1529
01:10:15,760 --> 01:10:19,480
I'm like making a oh, can I just
say I did one recently and I 

1530
01:10:20,680 --> 01:10:23,360
probably didn't get it for my 
acting, but also I didn't get it

1531
01:10:23,560 --> 01:10:26,760
because I did this shittest like
unnecessary Dodd banter of all 

1532
01:10:26,760 --> 01:10:28,440
time. 
It was a comedy role. 

1533
01:10:28,600 --> 01:10:32,280
I get ready for this right? 
I gave I was like she and Todd 

1534
01:10:32,280 --> 01:10:35,680
WME and again, like I'm doing it
enough. 

1535
01:10:35,680 --> 01:10:38,080
I should just be like she and 
Todd representative of WME. 

1536
01:10:38,280 --> 01:10:45,920
I'm like she and Todd WME and I 
gave my height and I said 511, 

1537
01:10:45,920 --> 01:10:49,720
but 6 foot with a quiff. 
Oh, that's so bad. 

1538
01:10:49,720 --> 01:10:51,840
Did you? 
Yeah, because I was like, 

1539
01:10:51,840 --> 01:10:54,680
they'll find that fucking 
hilarious. 511 Six foot with a 

1540
01:10:54,680 --> 01:10:57,240
quiff. 
No, I think that's good. 

1541
01:10:57,240 --> 01:11:01,680
So it's just to show you a bit 
of personality, but I am I would

1542
01:11:02,120 --> 01:11:06,080
can you, can you cry on demand? 
Let's try give me a scenario. 

1543
01:11:06,840 --> 01:11:13,680
And you're fucking shit comedy. 
Give me. 

1544
01:11:13,720 --> 01:11:15,520
Yeah, but yeah, no. 
Give me a scenario. 

1545
01:11:15,520 --> 01:11:18,120
Oh. 
You're at a gig and you're shit 

1546
01:11:18,120 --> 01:11:23,240
a company and so base. 
Oh, think about your child. 

1547
01:11:23,240 --> 01:11:27,760
Something awful has happened. 
He becomes a stand up comedian. 

1548
01:11:28,680 --> 01:11:30,640
And then I'm worried he's going 
to start getting, taking, 

1549
01:11:30,840 --> 01:11:33,200
taking. 
Your games for me and you've 

1550
01:11:33,200 --> 01:11:35,760
established that he's massive 
already, so he's probably near 

1551
01:11:36,040 --> 01:11:38,080
Gagan age. 
OK, I've got it. 

1552
01:11:41,560 --> 01:11:44,800
No, you can't cry on demand with
you. 

1553
01:11:45,040 --> 01:11:47,880
Your face looks upset though, 
but you more not going to keep 

1554
01:11:47,880 --> 01:11:50,480
just on a massive shit and 
you're exhausted from it. 

1555
01:11:53,440 --> 01:11:56,320
That's more that you could play 
someone who has bad eyesight. 

1556
01:11:58,400 --> 01:12:00,000
You know, you're just like, do 
you know what? 

1557
01:12:00,000 --> 01:12:01,560
I've always wanted to play a 
character. 

1558
01:12:01,880 --> 01:12:04,600
With somebody who talks like 
they're always about to yawn. 

1559
01:12:05,560 --> 01:12:07,280
Right, and I've and I've tried 
to do. 

1560
01:12:07,280 --> 01:12:10,240
That's a fucking great skill. 
Yeah, I don't even think. 

1561
01:12:10,640 --> 01:12:12,960
No, I can't do that. 
She's always, it's like she's 

1562
01:12:13,000 --> 01:12:18,040
always gonna just on the break 
of yawning, you talk for an hour

1563
01:12:18,040 --> 01:12:20,040
and a half, movie, you talk. 
I got the whole way through. 

1564
01:12:20,040 --> 01:12:21,880
I've tried to do it and some 
auditions like for coming. 

1565
01:12:21,880 --> 01:12:26,720
Thanks, mobile here. 
What do you guys she would she 

1566
01:12:26,720 --> 01:12:30,600
have a voice like this? 
What fuck I'm waiting for them 

1567
01:12:30,640 --> 01:12:32,440
to go. 
We need a guy who can do a voice

1568
01:12:32,440 --> 01:12:34,040
inside his mouth and I'll be 
like. 

1569
01:12:40,440 --> 01:12:43,560
Oh my. 
God, yeah, Maybe I should have 

1570
01:12:43,920 --> 01:12:45,960
done that. 
Like pretend I'm a wee alien guy

1571
01:12:45,960 --> 01:12:47,400
who has another wee alien guy in
his mouth. 

1572
01:12:47,400 --> 01:12:49,640
Yes. 
That would be amazing. 

1573
01:12:50,080 --> 01:12:51,560
I don't know. 
What have you got there? 

1574
01:12:51,800 --> 01:12:53,520
What have you got coming up? 
What's? 

1575
01:12:53,520 --> 01:12:55,880
Happening. 
I'm filming for a thing called 

1576
01:12:55,880 --> 01:12:57,720
Nova Jones that Dave's actually 
in as well. 

1577
01:12:57,800 --> 01:13:00,080
Yeah. 
And for BBC exclusive. 

1578
01:13:00,600 --> 01:13:03,360
I don't even know if I'm not to 
say that, but it doesn't matter.

1579
01:13:04,160 --> 01:13:09,320
I'm playing a horse. 
I have a full horse. 

1580
01:13:09,560 --> 01:13:10,800
Theatre Edition Did you have to 
go? 

1581
01:13:11,840 --> 01:13:15,960
Yep, Yep, I did, actually. 
Actually, I'm a human horse, 

1582
01:13:16,160 --> 01:13:18,960
right? 
So I'm a stylist called Clothes 

1583
01:13:18,960 --> 01:13:19,760
Horse. 
Fuck. 

1584
01:13:19,760 --> 01:13:23,840
I don't think I'm supposed to 
say any of this anyway, and. 

1585
01:13:24,160 --> 01:13:26,120
Whistle whistle deadline Get a 
hold of this. 

1586
01:13:27,480 --> 01:13:30,440
I'm fucked. 
And then I've also got my show 

1587
01:13:30,440 --> 01:13:33,000
Bridesmaids that's on sale at 
the minute and the Opera House 

1588
01:13:33,440 --> 01:13:37,280
that's later in the year though.
But if anyone's listening and 

1589
01:13:38,600 --> 01:13:41,160
it's on regional tour at your 
local theatre. 

1590
01:13:41,560 --> 01:13:43,040
So Bridesmaids. 
And then that's Nova Jones 

1591
01:13:43,040 --> 01:13:44,560
thing. 
But I have never had to put 

1592
01:13:44,560 --> 01:13:47,400
prosthetics on before, so I'm 
going to have a full You'll not 

1593
01:13:47,400 --> 01:13:50,760
know it's me, which is sort of 
shit for my ego. 

1594
01:13:51,240 --> 01:13:52,280
Right. 
Oh, yeah. 

1595
01:13:52,280 --> 01:13:53,320
Yeah. 
Well, I did. 

1596
01:13:53,320 --> 01:13:56,000
Isn't that that CBBC? 
Yeah, I did it. 

1597
01:13:56,000 --> 01:13:58,040
You know, you know, about my CBI
did a thing called Danny's 

1598
01:13:58,040 --> 01:14:02,640
Castle years ago and I had to 
wear white makeup. 

1599
01:14:02,680 --> 01:14:05,840
I was a goth essentially in it, 
but it was just when I was like 

1600
01:14:06,640 --> 01:14:08,640
figuring out out a Crohn's 
disease, so I didn't know. 

1601
01:14:08,760 --> 01:14:12,320
So I was like I lost like 3 
stone and I did this role and it

1602
01:14:12,320 --> 01:14:15,760
was like like a grand for four 
days filament. 

1603
01:14:16,000 --> 01:14:19,760
So I genuinely my rationale was 
like, I'll go to A&E on the last

1604
01:14:19,760 --> 01:14:23,080
day, the last day of filming. 
I literally like I knew there 

1605
01:14:23,120 --> 01:14:24,120
was. 
Some real time. 

1606
01:14:24,400 --> 01:14:26,960
Yeah, but it suited the cat. 
People were looking at me being 

1607
01:14:26,960 --> 01:14:29,800
like, how the fuck is he sunk 
his cheekbones on demand? 

1608
01:14:29,800 --> 01:14:32,920
I was like, no, I'm actually 
dying, but the last day of film.

1609
01:14:32,960 --> 01:14:35,040
Was a switch this week. 
The last day of film was the 

1610
01:14:35,040 --> 01:14:37,040
Thursday and I went straight 
from set. 

1611
01:14:37,160 --> 01:14:39,840
Like there was an after party. 
I was like, where are you going?

1612
01:14:39,840 --> 01:14:43,000
I was like, I'm going to the 
A&E, the Ulster instead and I 

1613
01:14:43,000 --> 01:14:46,640
just want to. 
Shit in hell I broke my toe on 

1614
01:14:46,640 --> 01:14:49,760
stage in the 1st 10 minutes of a
play and did did the two hour 

1615
01:14:49,760 --> 01:14:54,440
play and then had to do it for 
like 6 more weeks every night 

1616
01:14:54,600 --> 01:14:56,560
with a broken toe. 
Can't you can do fuck off for 

1617
01:14:56,560 --> 01:14:59,520
broken toe like so? 
I was inside a sleeping bag 

1618
01:14:59,520 --> 01:15:02,120
standing up and shuffling 
comedically across the stage 

1619
01:15:02,120 --> 01:15:05,040
inside this and then I fell over
and had to make it part of the 

1620
01:15:05,040 --> 01:15:06,760
thing. 
I was all I was meant to fall 

1621
01:15:06,760 --> 01:15:09,760
there, drag myself under. 
The way it probably didn't sound

1622
01:15:09,760 --> 01:15:12,240
like you were meant to fall when
you said I was meant to fall. 

1623
01:15:12,240 --> 01:15:16,880
There, but I so it's the worst. 
Final question, what would your 

1624
01:15:16,880 --> 01:15:20,440
dream thing to be in? 
Either something that exists or 

1625
01:15:20,440 --> 01:15:22,480
like a thing you would like to 
create. 

1626
01:15:22,760 --> 01:15:25,400
Well, my favourite show was The 
American Office. 

1627
01:15:26,680 --> 01:15:28,280
Fucking absolutely. 
Do you like it? 

1628
01:15:28,520 --> 01:15:31,560
No, Why? 
It's my favourite show. 

1629
01:15:31,560 --> 01:15:34,200
I've watched the whole series. 
I've watched all nine seasons 11

1630
01:15:34,200 --> 01:15:36,000
times. 
I don't think they're looking 

1631
01:15:36,000 --> 01:15:39,480
for my opinion on it, but too 
many characters. 

1632
01:15:39,520 --> 01:15:42,400
Too many characters. 
And also, I couldn't get over 

1633
01:15:42,400 --> 01:15:45,120
the fact the first episode is a 
exact remake because it was a 

1634
01:15:45,120 --> 01:15:46,800
pilot. 
It's exact remake of the first 

1635
01:15:46,800 --> 01:15:49,000
episode of the UK office, which 
is one of my favourites of all 

1636
01:15:49,000 --> 01:15:51,760
time. 
And I couldn't then I couldn't 

1637
01:15:51,760 --> 01:15:55,160
judge the American office. 
Yeah, without bias of seeing 

1638
01:15:55,160 --> 01:15:57,840
that because I just, I was like,
oh fuck is I don't like this. 

1639
01:15:58,080 --> 01:16:02,000
And I was then watching a couple
episodes of it, but in the back 

1640
01:16:02,000 --> 01:16:06,480
of my brain, the back lobe was 
like, you've you don't like 

1641
01:16:06,480 --> 01:16:08,240
this? 
And then my front lobe was like,

1642
01:16:08,240 --> 01:16:10,440
give it a chance. 
And my back lobe goes, no, he 

1643
01:16:10,440 --> 01:16:12,000
doesn't. 
The master doesn't like this. 

1644
01:16:12,240 --> 01:16:13,800
And my front lobe's like please.
And my back. 

1645
01:16:13,800 --> 01:16:16,040
Lobe's like, yeah, he. 
Doesn't like. 

1646
01:16:17,360 --> 01:16:21,120
It that's so weird, weird and I 
love it. 

1647
01:16:21,120 --> 01:16:22,800
I think it's amazing, but you 
have to give it a go because it 

1648
01:16:22,800 --> 01:16:24,680
comes under its own after like 
tooth and I hate that because. 

1649
01:16:24,680 --> 01:16:27,000
After two seasons, well, how 
much time do you think I have in

1650
01:16:27,000 --> 01:16:28,880
my hands? 
Well, shit's Creek. 

1651
01:16:28,880 --> 01:16:30,520
I don't. 
I hated shit's Creek. 

1652
01:16:30,600 --> 01:16:31,600
I liked it. 
I didn't. 

1653
01:16:31,600 --> 01:16:32,680
Not enough to watch more than 
six. 

1654
01:16:32,680 --> 01:16:34,880
Epis, I watched all fucking six 
seasons of it going. 

1655
01:16:34,880 --> 01:16:36,440
It's going to come through. 
That's weird to me. 

1656
01:16:37,120 --> 01:16:38,360
I know. 
Here's the thing. 

1657
01:16:38,520 --> 01:16:41,520
I love Ricky Jubais. 
I love Afterlife. 

1658
01:16:41,520 --> 01:16:43,920
I haven't finished the last 
episode. 

1659
01:16:44,040 --> 01:16:47,640
I'm halfway through it. 
Why something else like came up 

1660
01:16:47,640 --> 01:16:50,240
and I just. 
What's happening there is you're

1661
01:16:50,240 --> 01:16:52,280
afraid to say goodbye because 
you know it's the last 10. 

1662
01:16:52,800 --> 01:16:54,200
My God, maybe it is. 
Do you want to see me crying, 

1663
01:16:54,240 --> 01:16:58,760
man? 
You're afraid to say goodbye to 

1664
01:16:58,760 --> 01:17:00,240
that show. 
That's a show you cannot watch 

1665
01:17:00,240 --> 01:17:02,280
with the dry eye. 
I know you will cry. 

1666
01:17:02,280 --> 01:17:03,120
Watch that show. 
I can. 

1667
01:17:03,200 --> 01:17:04,880
I would love you can. 
Yeah, because you're dead. 

1668
01:17:04,880 --> 01:17:08,640
And I would love to be in the 
American office. 

1669
01:17:08,640 --> 01:17:12,760
And if I was to, I'd love to 
write and star me own fucking 

1670
01:17:12,760 --> 01:17:13,840
Netflix show. 
Of course you would. 

1671
01:17:13,840 --> 01:17:14,840
Or, you know, I mean, everybody 
would. 

1672
01:17:14,840 --> 01:17:19,560
What about you? 
I also wanted to be the first 

1673
01:17:19,560 --> 01:17:21,880
female here to do the SSE in 
five years. 

1674
01:17:21,880 --> 01:17:23,240
Whatever it wasn't. 
Sure, fucking there's John 

1675
01:17:23,280 --> 01:17:24,320
McNally now doing it. 
Fair. 

1676
01:17:24,320 --> 01:17:26,880
Yeah, she's from down South. 
Let's bring politics into it. 

1677
01:17:27,080 --> 01:17:30,640
But then it's getting the it's 
getting narrower then and back 

1678
01:17:30,640 --> 01:17:34,640
over the first female from the 
north over 30 like it's going to

1679
01:17:34,640 --> 01:17:36,280
get well you. 
Could be you'd be the first 

1680
01:17:36,360 --> 01:17:38,240
Northern Irish female. 
Could you be the first? 

1681
01:17:38,560 --> 01:17:41,000
You could be the first British 
comedian to Yeah, you could say 

1682
01:17:41,000 --> 01:17:42,240
that and that you sell it like 
that. 

1683
01:17:42,720 --> 01:17:45,400
You go back to Derry and go, I'm
going to be the first. 

1684
01:17:45,520 --> 01:17:48,600
British. 
Woman to do this. 

1685
01:17:48,600 --> 01:17:49,480
I love it. 
Let's go. 

1686
01:17:50,000 --> 01:17:52,440
No, no, you. 
If you did it, you would. 

1687
01:17:52,560 --> 01:17:53,560
You would. 
That would be your. 

1688
01:17:53,560 --> 01:17:55,160
You would. 
That's a valid claim. 

1689
01:17:55,560 --> 01:17:58,160
But it's just more specific than
the first girl that would have 

1690
01:17:58,160 --> 01:18:01,520
been better. 
I'm the first young male 

1691
01:18:01,520 --> 01:18:03,240
comedian from here with great 
hair to do it. 

1692
01:18:04,040 --> 01:18:07,600
Right, I suppose the other ones 
are bald are. 

1693
01:18:07,600 --> 01:18:11,240
Yeah, I'm the first follically 
blessed guy to do it. 

1694
01:18:12,520 --> 01:18:13,920
Yeah, they're all bald. 
That's mad. 

1695
01:18:14,080 --> 01:18:16,080
Yeah, everyone is. 
It's like maybe you'll get. 

1696
01:18:16,080 --> 01:18:17,440
Well, they told me I had to do 
it. 

1697
01:18:17,560 --> 01:18:19,760
To do the SSE, you had to SSE, 
he said. 

1698
01:18:19,760 --> 01:18:21,280
You got to, you got to beck the 
head. 

1699
01:18:21,720 --> 01:18:23,600
Manscape your man did and shave 
your head. 

1700
01:18:23,880 --> 01:18:25,400
Exactly. 
Yeah, I want to be in curb 

1701
01:18:25,400 --> 01:18:27,960
enthusiasm. 
Pardon curb enthusiasm. 

1702
01:18:27,960 --> 01:18:29,080
Oh, you want to be? 
You want. 

1703
01:18:29,160 --> 01:18:31,040
To be in that. 
Yeah, yeah, Good show I. 

1704
01:18:31,160 --> 01:18:33,800
Think I would be good in. 
That would you ever want to do a

1705
01:18:33,800 --> 01:18:37,520
show like, like, do you like 
pranks? 

1706
01:18:37,960 --> 01:18:39,800
Because I always think that's 
every time there's a fucking 

1707
01:18:39,800 --> 01:18:40,520
round to BBC. 
Thank you. 

1708
01:18:40,520 --> 01:18:42,400
Like, oh, like we should Patrick
a prank. 

1709
01:18:42,400 --> 01:18:44,320
Look at the street being funny. 
Yeah. 

1710
01:18:44,440 --> 01:18:45,880
Here's the thing about hidden 
camera shows. 

1711
01:18:45,880 --> 01:18:48,480
I love them and I love watching 
Practical Jokers and things like

1712
01:18:48,480 --> 01:18:50,040
that. 
You couldn't do it locally 

1713
01:18:50,040 --> 01:18:51,800
because you would get your fuck 
knocked in. 

1714
01:18:52,480 --> 01:18:54,240
You go up to some guy. 
All right, mate, there's a snake

1715
01:18:54,240 --> 01:18:55,600
in your back. 
I'm putting a snake in your 

1716
01:18:55,600 --> 01:18:57,120
back. 
I was like, are you dickhead? 

1717
01:18:57,360 --> 01:18:58,960
Yeah. 
Kills you in the first episode. 

1718
01:18:58,960 --> 01:19:01,280
And it plus everyone, but like 
you're sure you're you're Keith 

1719
01:19:01,280 --> 01:19:03,760
Chris. 
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 

1720
01:19:03,880 --> 01:19:05,240
What are you doing? 
Yeah, exactly. 

1721
01:19:05,400 --> 01:19:06,880
Oh no, I just work in this 
bakery. 

1722
01:19:06,920 --> 01:19:09,480
And Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. 
It's like with Impractical 

1723
01:19:09,480 --> 01:19:11,360
Jokers knowing you're like, no, 
everyone knows. 

1724
01:19:11,360 --> 01:19:14,400
Like they they're like, he's not
pretending to be a fucking a 

1725
01:19:14,400 --> 01:19:16,920
waiter serving you do what? 
I mean, like, we know who he is 

1726
01:19:16,920 --> 01:19:18,080
now, why he's up. 
Yeah. 

1727
01:19:18,080 --> 01:19:21,080
But yeah, I like stuff like 
that, but I don't know if it 

1728
01:19:21,720 --> 01:19:24,280
don't want to do I find prank? 
I don't know what it is with the

1729
01:19:24,280 --> 01:19:27,600
age I find prank shows harder to
what I don't like seeing people 

1730
01:19:27,960 --> 01:19:30,280
not cringy but like oh. 
You feel bad on the victim. 

1731
01:19:30,280 --> 01:19:34,400
Yeah, like you've been framed 
with some mad shit but made 

1732
01:19:34,400 --> 01:19:37,960
people think aliens had landed 
in their garden or a guy's van 

1733
01:19:37,960 --> 01:19:39,880
had gone off a Cliff. 
And at the time I was hilarious.

1734
01:19:39,880 --> 01:19:42,440
I was like, yes, Beetle, you 
fucking one handed bandit. 

1735
01:19:42,480 --> 01:19:43,840
But now I'm Do you know? 
What's happened to you? 

1736
01:19:43,880 --> 01:19:45,360
You've become a parent. 
Yeah. 

1737
01:19:45,520 --> 01:19:47,200
And it's made you soft. 
That's what happens. 

1738
01:19:47,280 --> 01:19:48,600
Yeah. 
Because now you even like. 

1739
01:19:48,600 --> 01:19:51,400
I'm soft until I have a hammer 
and people need to get across 

1740
01:19:51,400 --> 01:19:55,080
the bridge. 
I couldn't even lift the 

1741
01:19:55,080 --> 01:20:00,240
invisible hammer. 
Yeah, bridesmaid, we'll put you 

1742
01:20:00,240 --> 01:20:01,880
said you send me a link for 
that. 

1743
01:20:02,120 --> 01:20:04,800
I'll send it to Dan. 
We'll put it in the description 

1744
01:20:04,800 --> 01:20:06,200
on YouTube. 
Brilliant. 

1745
01:20:06,600 --> 01:20:09,040
That's great. 
It shows the Opera House and 

1746
01:20:09,400 --> 01:20:13,320
about 15 other shows around and 
then a well counted. 

1747
01:20:14,280 --> 01:20:15,800
No, I can't. 
Just say it this one come out 

1748
01:20:15,800 --> 01:20:16,840
for a couple of weeks you 
probably. 

1749
01:20:16,960 --> 01:20:17,440
Can. 
No, I can't. 

1750
01:20:17,440 --> 01:20:20,560
That's for next year. 
Is it a show without you? 

1751
01:20:20,600 --> 01:20:25,760
A different show. 
And Bridesmaids is being 

1752
01:20:25,760 --> 01:20:28,240
rewritten for an English 
audience and Turn England next 

1753
01:20:28,240 --> 01:20:29,520
year. 
Is that what it is? 

1754
01:20:29,520 --> 01:20:31,200
Is that what you couldn't? 
Say, but it's not. 

1755
01:20:31,360 --> 01:20:33,960
I shouldn't say that. 
I've said it, said it well 

1756
01:20:34,440 --> 01:20:36,480
anyway. 
Over in England. 

1757
01:20:36,680 --> 01:20:38,600
Yeah, but is there English 
people watching us? 

1758
01:20:38,840 --> 01:20:41,080
Oh why we get them from all over
from all. 

1759
01:20:41,080 --> 01:20:43,200
They'll be a fella literally 
watching this in Timbuktu. 

1760
01:20:43,200 --> 01:20:45,760
I'm not joking. 
I'll find out what that is on my

1761
01:20:45,760 --> 01:20:48,480
math when I go home. 
Yeah, You, you think that's down

1762
01:20:48,480 --> 01:20:49,560
South? 
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 

1763
01:20:49,560 --> 01:20:52,560
That's an awfully, isn't it? 
Thank you very much for coming 

1764
01:20:52,560 --> 01:20:53,440
on. 
Thanks for having me. 

1765
01:20:53,440 --> 01:20:55,000
Appreciate it. 
The way you put your shoe for it

1766
01:20:55,000 --> 01:20:57,840
as have you had a brand collab 
with some shoe manufacturers? 

1767
01:20:58,080 --> 01:21:00,400
Also, just let me point out. 
Whilst I'm here. 

1768
01:21:00,480 --> 01:21:01,800
Adidas. 
Yeah. 

1769
01:21:01,800 --> 01:21:03,040
Thank you very much, Jonah, for 
coming on. 

1770
01:21:03,320 --> 01:21:04,240
Appreciate it. 
Thanks. 

1771
01:21:04,440 --> 01:21:05,800
For me. 
Thanks for the tea. 

1772
01:21:06,400 --> 01:21:06,760
You're welcome.