I'm Michael Che and I'm Colin Jose, and we've got a little
secret. Actually, it's a pretty big
secret. Well, now you got to give the
people something. I'm not saying a word.
Oh, then people will know to tune in.
Come on, tell them a little like how we're hosting of comedy
events streaming only on Peacock.
Exactly how it's called New York After dark.
And it's a comedy show that only features drop in comic boom, you
nail into Michael Chase phone numbers.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, hey, hey, New York After Dark.
It's some kind of comedy thing, and it's streaming now only on
Peacock. You love it.
Zippers, don't get angry, don't crack up.
A very, very quick note for me, the chief zipper, just to say
that we were supposed to do the live podcast this Sunday, but
we're going to put it back for one week purely because Mummy
was supposed to go on a trip. It looks like it's going to be
delayed or cancelled, so I have hired out the entire merchant
hotel just to have a little nap in.
So I'm going away this weekend. I don't want to rush doing the
live episode. We're going to move it back a
week. I hope that's OK.
Please, please don't be my friend.
Please don't be my friend. I love you.
Thank you zippers. Welcome to the tea with me
podcast me, she and Todd. We may well include that at the
start of the podcast where I don't know if my takeaway tea
has almond milk and it could be regular milk.
And for the purpose of the podcast, if and I'd set it out,
I'm going to set it out. I don't know how we smell it and
see if you think it's if it's almond because I only have
almond milk. I don't have a hey, why is COVID
such a big thing here? Sniff the lid of my coffee.
Sniff my lid. What are you thinking?
It's yeah. And I've already taken a sip all
the two sippers. If this is a 3 minute podcast,
we all know why. We all know why.
But listen, I'm just going to set it out.
And this one of the first times I've done the podcast with like
T. But we're adopting at the
minute. That's what it's all about.
That's what life's all about at the minute.
Everybody's adopting, everybody's learning new skills.
And that's one of the things I want to talk about because my
man Rishi Sunak, no Rishi Sunak 100% sounds like somewhere in
Turkey where people from Belfast go to get really cheap, like
veneers put in and stuff. Like 100%.
It sounds like somewhere your uncle will go for a hair
transplant. You know, he comes, he's been
bald for years. He comes back with a, with a
quiff and you're like, what are you doing?
And he goes, mate, I'm just back from Rishi Sunak, Rishi Sunak.
So in somewhere that I would, I would definitely like to be in
Rishi Sunak with a couple of cocktails just enjoying myself,
Rishi Sunak. But unfortunately Rishi Sunak is
just a terrible guy. He is the Chancellor of the
Exchequer, he's a politician and he's basically said, which is
very adequate. He's busy said something like
pretty offensive to a lot of people, which is mild because I
think the government's handling of COVID up until this point,
both locally and over in London has been exemplary.
If I'm honest. I think, I think I want to say
right now that I think Boris Johnson and his cabinet have
done a brilliant job. I think they've really, they've
handled it well. I think I think I speak for
everyone want to say it's a good time at the minute, especially
freelance people like myself. Mike, you loving it too?
He's loving it. We just want to give.
Hey, we just want to say to the Tory government, nice work.
Thank. Yeah, we'll say thanks.
Because what we lack in money, we make up for in goodwill
towards your handling of this whole thing.
But a bit out of character. They have done something a
little bit sly and that is Rishi Sunak.
And I think that undermines me being angry at this because his
name is Rishi Sunak. Like you can't be angry at Rishi
Sunak. Rishi Sun Rishi Sunak is fun.
And also try centre five times really fast.
Rishi Sunak, Rishi Sunak. Rishi Sunak.
Rishi Sunak, Rishi Sunak. But Rishi Sunak essentially came
out not as gay. He came out and he said
musicians, people in that kind of industry, probably comedians
too, should just retrain. Just retrain and go and do and
another job stopping short of sent a real job.
And then what's kind of funny is and what 2020 is, is like he
said that in an interview with ITV.
And then ITV had to be like, oh, yeah, he didn't actually say
that. But the headlines were already
out there. The tweets were already out
there. And Rishi Sunak was just getting
hammered for it. And then Rishi Sunak's like,
hey, I didn't say that. And then everybody's like, yeah,
but you have also, you and your mates have done so much else
that is bad, you know, So he's getting attacked for it.
My mom, Rishi, soon. I didn't even really say that.
But there is that attitude of, you know, go and do a real job,
you know, to musicians, to comedians.
And I really resent that because as a comedian, I work very, very
hard. On average, for about 20 minutes
a week, you know, on a Wednesday night or whatever.
If I'm doing 3 gigs in a week, I could be working for three hours
and I and I'm going out there breaking my back, working hard
and Rishi Sunak sending me back down the mine.
I don't want to go back down the mine.
OK, because I've been down there, I've done manual labour
before. My hands are scarred.
I'm only joking. I've just worked in a call
centre before. But I I just want to just keep
doing stand up Rishi Sunak and Rishi Sunak.
I don't know why you're not letting me do stand up.
And people are like retrain, do a real job.
Do you know how much of a nightmare I would be in a real
job? If you like.
I'm a stand up comedian, so it's my job to try and be funny.
That's the job is take the funny out of everything.
Something horrific happens, try and find the funny out of it.
That's why comedians get criticised a lot, because people
all you can't say that sometimes you'll get it wrong, but often
you're just trying to find a little bit of lightness in the
dark or something really silly could happen and you make a joke
out of it. Like on my way to the studio, I
saw two. Here's the thing, there's two, I
don't know them as such, but there are two gentlemen lovers
that live, I think around here. 2 gentlemen lovers.
OK. And I saw these two gentlemen
lovers just for came down the studio on a tandem bicycle.
And you might not think that that is true.
And you might be like, oh, that's just something he's he's
made-up. But Big Mike's in the studio and
Big Mike, I'm not going to show this on camera in case someone's
like, oh, that's actually my 2 uncles and I actually didn't
know they were in a relationship.
But like Big Mike's uncle on his friend.
Look, comedians, we, we sometimes work hard for last,
but then sometimes we see two gentlemen lovers on a tandem
bicycle. And the key thing is in matching
luminous jackets, matching. Here's the thing.
If you are on a tandem bicycle, wear different clothes.
Because if you're just two men on a tandem bicycle in the same
outfit, I can't go on with my day.
I can't do anything. I can't go home and look after
my son because the whole time he'll be, you know, cooing away
and he'll he'll be like giggling and stuff because he's just a
wee baby. But, and I'll be smiling back,
but my head's not there. My head will be thinking about
the two gentlemen lovers. I think they could just be very,
very good friends. But I'll be thinking about them
in a tandem bicycle because that is the point their relationship
is at where they're like, I can't cycle without you.
Why? Why do you think that they're
what? Why do I think the gentleman
lovers? Because I think it had.
It has been. Yeah, I'm in a way I'm making an
assumption because someone has point.
It has been pointed out to me before.
And that is a sign that, you know, a lot of places in this
part of the world are still catching up.
You know, in this, in this, if you want to say country, if you
want to say island, if you want whatever you want to say.
There's definitely been an ideated attitude towards the
notion of two gentlemen and being lovers.
And it has been pointed out to me before that they are two
gentlemen lovers. Someone has said to me before
they are the two gentlemen lovers.
Now this was a long time ago, so it wouldn't even be pointed out.
No, but this was back in the day when people would pointed out.
And the reason I know they're gentlemen lovers now is because
they've done bicycle and there. And there is something about
that that was so, so beautiful to me.
I only took a picture of it to show you.
I'm not gonna obviously want to post that or anything like that,
but it's just to show you that while there is madness in the
world, there is also beautiful things happening to like.
Seeing that gave me so much joy in my heart that it made me for
a minute and I'll think about Rishi Sunak.
I don't want to hear about Rishi Sunak telling singers, you know,
go work in a totally different job.
I want to see gentlemen, lovers or not, getting on tandem
bicycles because you can't be really annoyed at anything if
two guys go past you on a tandem bicycle.
It's just a, it's just a, it's a nice moment as two people
literally working In Sync. But Rishi Sunak, what he
actually had said was people in all walks of life might have to
retrain and go and do a different job.
And part of me, like part of me understands that.
But then he can't say that because his government has
handled this really badly. So it's because of his friends,
his mates that he works with, that we would have to go and get
different jobs. And I've never thought about
really, I've never really thought about what would I do if
I had to get a job because I've worked jobs before, since I was
like 1516. I, I've been on the dole before
for a couple of weeks. We used to take in a wee book
and they go, what have you been doing?
And you're like, oh, just this here.
And they're like me and I really don't care.
Here's your £50 or whatever. And so I thought what I would do
is in case I do need to get what the Tory government would
probably call a real job. And I thought I would look at
some weird jobs around the world that I could potentially get.
So number one on this list of weird jobs I found that I could
potentially do is a professional pusher.
Japan is indeed a hardworking nation.
It makes sure that all its people reach work on time.
And that's why Japan has employed people to push others
on the trains so that nobody is late for work.
Now, this is imagery that we've seen before.
How many times you've seen videos online where there is
people in Japan literally being forced on the trains and the
door can barely close, but they get them on them?
Like I've never seen just one guy being left on the platform.
They're like, no, everybody's getting in.
And I remember reading something that said some people in Japan,
if they're going on a really long train journey and they're
going to be like boxed in like that, they were adult nappies.
I'm not, I'm not making that up. That is actually a real thing.
And that's terrifying because on a Translink train here, you
know, if someone's within, even before COVID, if someone's
within 2 feet of you there, you're going to talk.
You know, we don't like people being packed into trains, but in
Japan, they love it. Could I see myself as a
professional pusher? Yeah, I like pushing someone in
the right. Pushing someone is enjoyable if
it's a friend, you know, like we playful, playful, you know, just
a playful push. When you like, you know, you're
like shut up and all you just gives, like when one of your
mates is like here, what are you doing?
We should go down to Halfords and look at town, the bicycles
and you're like shut, you know, you just give them a little a
little shoulder push. I like that.
I like you know, whenever, whenever you're playing football
maybe and you get into a little bit RG bargie with someone in
you, you know, the two hands shelf.
That's enjoyable. Haven't done one of those in a
while or been given one of those in a while.
But pushing it, pushing is enjoyable.
Like punching, I wouldn't enjoy that.
Wouldn't ever like to hurt someone.
But pushing someone on their train, yeah, 100%.
Like, yeah, I could do that. And the guy in the little, the
little Japanese and I'm not. And by the way, when I said the
little Japanese man, I'm not, I can't see that compared to other
people. He is not that tall.
And that's not me saying Asian people are small, but that's me
saying that this guy I'm looking in particular is a small man.
And but he's got like a wee pilot's hat on and white gloves
and a full suit. And I like that he's a
professional pusher. You were thinking that job,
you'd wear your own clothes, but he's got all that gear on.
So I would, I would like that number 2 rental boyfriend in
Tokyo. So hey, we're still in Japan.
If you have the money, finding a boyfriend as easy as it gets.
I don't really know what all the boys, what professional
boyfriends do, but it sounds like fun.
A rental boyfriend. I don't like the idea of being a
rental boyfriend mainly because I am an actual husband, so I
don't think my wife would be delighted if I was like on the
way to work here. Where are you going?
Oh, just over to be a rental boyfriend.
I don't think that will go down well.
Rental boyfriend though. Dolls sound like an indie band
that would play Queen student junior whenever you were
younger. I'll not read all these open
number for professional sleeper. I could be a professional
sleeper, and professional sleepers doze off while
scientists conduct research on sleep disorders.
This has to be undoubtedly the most comfortable job on the
planet. And no, that's not for me as a
job. If I had to get a real job
because I don't like the idea of people watching me sleep, is
this the thing? The other people not like this
as well. The idea that somebody, because
you're so you're vulnerable when you sleep, especially the way I
sleep vulnerable, you know, I sleep in a very vulnerable way,
like very much fatal position on my side.
But I wouldn't like that because I even remember whenever I was
staying in an airport hotel in London, it was like he threw a
gap work and it was it's a wee, it's a wee job.
But this all comes back to Japan.
It was a wee Japanese hotel in the airport and it's called like
I nearly said, it's like this, but I know it's not this, but
it's like right, it's the hotel is called something like you
sushi, but I know that it's not you sushi because I know London
airport. I just need to cover myself here
for legal reasons. I really hope it is something
like you sushi. It's called the you tell it's
it's a Japanese owned from and it's called you tell as in like
hotel. But yo, this is a hotel in the
airport. So it's actually in the airport.
I've stayed in. I like staying in the airport
because you literally roll out of bed and you go through your
security gate. You don't have to, you know,
when someone's like, we'll stay in the hotel airport, but it's 4
miles away and you've got to get a shuttle bus and the shuttle
bus isn't there. And then you've got to get a
taxi in and it's stressful and you may as well stayed in the
city. I stayed in the you Hotel and
lovely Asian gentleman checked me in and then brought me to my
pod. So it's like you stay in like a
pod, like a very small room and true story, if anyone has stayed
here before you'll know this. There is a hatch at the front of
the room. So on the door there is like a 1
foot by 1 foot glass screen and it has like a adjustable thing
where you can like look in from inside or you know from inside
you can look out and people can look in or you can obviously
close it. And I went into my room and it
was really late at night. I just back from a gig in London
and the guy working there said open or closed.
And I said what do you mean? And he said screen on door open
or closed. And I was like, I might be weird
here and go for closed because if I said had his head open,
anybody walking down the corridor could have just picked
in and just seen me in my wee Japanese pod all curled up like
why? Why is it an option?
Like what is what is the benefit
of being able to look in? Why was he give?
And then when I say closed, he looked at me like, oh, very
well. I was like, presume the people
want to close and then if they open it, that sort of thing.
But yeah, I couldn't be a professional sleeper.
Umm, OK, let me see. No, I don't like that water
slide tester. Yeah, water slide testers have
to check all aspects of safety and make sure these rides are
absolutely safe. There's always medical insurance
for those who bring a boner to water slide tester is definitely
something I can get on board with.
But I did nearly die on a water slide in in Turkey once in in in
Rishi Sunak in Turkey. I, I was at AI was at a water
park in Rishi Sunak and it was the Rishi Sunak water park.
And it was like 4 slides that are very fast and you've got to
go uploads of steps, really high slide.
And I went up to the top and everyone I was with were like,
let's do a race. And so you can get to the
bottom. First.
The slide I was on, I'll try and describe this.
Well, it was like a tube. The slide was like a tube for
about 20 feet and then it opened up into a half tube.
So just your back was on the slide and it was open air, but
the start of it, it was like a tube that then opens out.
Thought in any way makes sense. I wanted to win the race so
badly that I pushed myself off from the wee top that you hold
on to. But I pushed myself off that
fast that my back left the slide because also gravity keeps your
back down and but I does it. I'm not sure, but I left it off
to the point where where the tube opens like, you know what I
mean? Like this, I hit my head, my
forehead on the bottom bed of the tube that was open.
And I came to when I was in the weed pool at the bottom and all
the lifeguards were blowing the whistle like, you need to get
out. You need to get out.
And I was like, I, I die. I thought I died, you know, and
they were like, you need to get out, get out.
And so I don't think I'll be a good water slide tester.
And then also, once I was in Florida, I went down a slide.
My mom insisted that I wore arm bands and I was actually a
champion child swimmer, which is true.
And the one not a lot. Like I did a couple of gallows
and when I was younger and for some reason I had to wear arm
bands even though I could swim. So embarrassing.
And I hit the pool at the bottom and one of the arm bods came off
and I was very calmly swimming to the side to grab the arm and
then get out. But I was obviously swimming to
do this. And a guy who's clearly a
lifeguard but has never had to go in before was like, this is
my moment. And he just dived in to drag.
Like they put me in the safety position and Get Me Out.
But it was a small pool. And when he dived, he just busy
landed on me and obviously wrecked me.
So when I came out, I was crying.
And he said to my like my mom, he was like, there's your boy,
you know, And he's like, he's upset.
He can't swim. He lost his arm.
And I was like really crying. You fell on me for a piece of
shit. So I wouldn't like to do that
chicken sexer. I could be a chicken sexer.
A chicken sexual job is to identify the gender of a baby
chicken. That's about it.
It feels like an easy job. I wouldn't mind it.
But then I don't like the idea of, you know, just assign an
agenda to the chicken without first speaking to the chicken
about it. You know, don't like the idea of
me saying you're a boy to the the check.
And it's like, you know, with his eyes, it's like, no, you're
wrong. So I don't like the idea of
assigning genders to cheques. Basically, umm, pet food taster.
No professional mourner like a funerals.
Yeah. Yeah, it's bit of me.
We'll do one or two more. What the fuck is that last one?
Wrinkle chaser? A wrinkle chaser says that all
wrinkle chasers make sure there are no creases on shoes when
they're W out of the factory. How else would those high heels
look so classy? I mean, that is potentially the
sassiest job of all time. I'm a wrinkle chaser, darling.
I'm chasing the wrinkles. What does that mean?
I'm looking at heels, darling. If there's a crease, it won't
leave the factory. I would like to be a wrinkle
chaser, 100% wrinkle chaser is going to be the name of my next
stand up show just chasing those wrinkles.
And so yeah, fair play, Rishi Sunak.
I've taken your advice on board and then I'm looking at other
other potential careers. But it is quite funny that Rishi
Sunak didn't might have not actually said however, so you
did say at least like I didn't ITV have deleted their tweet and
everyone's like, I know, but you still sell it.
He said, Oh yeah. And like, yeah, I want to look
on NME for the actual article there and it says this page
doesn't exist. So they all had to take it down.
But that in a way that is, I don't really have sympathy for
government at the minute, but but that kind of is the way it
is at the minute where someone will misquote a person slightly
and then there's going to be a headline tomorrow.
She and Todd says all tandem bicyclists are gaylords.
I'm no, I'm not. No, let's be clear.
I'm not saying tan anyone on a tandem bicycle is gay.
I'm saying that I'm saying that tandem bicycling is maybe not
the straightest sport in the in the world, but then again, is
any form of cycle and very heterosexual is it?
As a guy who who rode a bicycle every day up until he was 21 and
passed his driving test, I didn't think I looked
particularly cool doing it. You know, I didn't think I
looked masculine doing or anything like that.
So at the end of the day, I think if we all cycled about a
little bit more and had a bit of fun on a bike, I think to be
less prejudice in the world. So yeah, I don't mean I'm happy
to go with one of those jobs. Or if there's if, if there's
just jobs, I don't know about the people because sometimes you
see the worst jobs of all time. Like I've seen that documentary
in Channel 4. Think what do you call Timmy
Mallet? Know who's got those Time Team?
Not Timmy Mallet. Tony Malt.
Tony. Tony Soprano.
Yeah, he did a documentary like the worst jobs of all time.
It was like Victorian jobs when I went, you know, they went down
wells and all that kind of thing.
Fuck off. If I if I didn't do stand up,
What about if if the government were like can't do stand up
anymore? Stand up band got to get like a
real job and I was like, all right, no worries.
And then just relaunch myself as a musician because, you know,
even though music gigs aren't happening, it would be nice to
say that I've done it. I always dream of it, like
obviously do MCPS or sometimes. So that might be fun, but I
don't know. I'm just going to keep, I'm just
going to keep doing stand up and I'm just going to keep doing it.
I think. I mean, maybe I won't be able
to. And then I will have to get some
sort of other job. But if there's creases to be
fined, I'll chase them. And I mentioned Victorian jobs
there. And then there's a link at the
bottom of this to 56 delightful Victorian slang terms you should
be using. See, this is what I'm all about,
bringing old phrases back, bringing words back like
Christian Naire news on the podcast earlier in the week, by
the way, what a great episode. Umm, Christian was talking about
the phrase Buck Alec, calling somebody Buck Alec, which is
great. And then today he said, I said
using any more new phrases and he said start calling people a
goat again. Goat is brilliant because it
could be an insult or a compliment because now people
say go greatest of all time. So if you're like what you're
doing, you fucking goat, some people might be like, oh, thank
you, but you actually mean you're an idiot.
So these are phrases British writer Andrew Forrester
published of Passing English of the Victorian Era, a Dictionary
of heterodox English slang and phrase.
Thousands of words in it 1870 have drifted away.
But this was a way to like preserve them and bring them
back. So I'll not look at the meaning
of it. I'll tell you what I think it
is. The first one is afternoonified,
like personified, but afternoonified.
Does afternoonified mean? No, I don't know what I mean.
A society word mean and smart. For example, the goods are not
afternoonified enough for me. I mean, I enjoy saying it, but I
don't get it, you know? I don't get it.
Like if I go to a bar and then I leave and then people text me
like where'd you go there? I say sorry mate, place wasn't
afternoonified enough for my liking.
Afternoonified is fun to say. I like it.
Orphan. Orphan for norf.
Orphan Orph, a figure of speech used to describe drunken men,
for example. He's very orphan for norf,
meaning he has had many arfs or half pints of booze.
So an arf was 1/2 pint of booze? Yeah.
Oh orphan. Oh, like an arf of lager.
Ah man, I got scooped last night.
What's wrong? I slip an orphan orphan off.
I was orphan off because the place was an afternoon fight.
Backslang it. Thieves used this term to
indicate they wanted to go out the back way.
Dirty bastards back slang it. Don't get it.
In 1850 there was a term called bags of mystery.
Bags of mystery that was a term for sausages because no mom but
the maker knows what is in them. The bag refers to the gut which
contained the chopped meat. I mean that doesn't sound very
health and safety. They did call something a bag of
mystery and I don't like the idea that only the butcher knows
what I surely he can just tell you.
I love that the butcher's like, listen, man, I love that I love
to tell you what's in these, but it's fuck it.
I haven't a baldy, mate. I haven't a baldy.
I mean, all I can tell you is there's a bag of gut and the
shop made inside it. But it could be peg, it could be
squirrel meat. Bang up to the elephant.
Bang up to the I haven't heard anyone ever say to me bang up to
the elephant. The phrase originated in London
in 1882 and means perfect, complete, unapproachable by as
bang up to the elephant. That's a brilliant phrase.
What's his podcast like? Bang up to the elephant myth
Bang up to the elephant. Enjoy that.
And there's 1A phrase here called a body Fang, Batty Fang
spelled Batty Fang, Batty Fang low London phrase meaning to
trash thoroughly, possibly from the French butter a phone.
So if I was going to trash, if I if you piss me off, I would come
to your house and I would just do a Batty Fang.
I'd get off my I'd park my tandem bicycle and I'd Batty
Fang your house so bad Banjo, a 19th century sailor slang for a
riotous holiday or a noisy day in the streets.
I'm away. I'm away to Rishi SUNY for a
banjo here. By why mutton?
A naval term referring to meat so bad it might be dog flesh.
Oh, that's by why mutton It How's your burger?
By why mutton? By why mutton Sounds like a
complete character in a Sunday World.
You'd a Brigadier By why mutton? Bricky, brave or fearless?
Umm, meaning someone meaning. Yeah, meaning someone's brave.
Uh, butter up bacon extravagance.
Too much extravagance. Are you going to put lace over
the feather? Isn't that rather butter up
bacon? Butter up.
That's a fucking belter of a phrase.
Because you obviously don't need butter in the bacon because it's
like it's rich enough. You know, it's fatty enough.
Butter a bacon is butter a palm bacon, right?
Butter a palm bacon, right? That's a brilliant phrase.
The next time I'm doing like a big show, like a big stand up
show and I say, listen, have we got the gold curtains?
And they say, yes, we've got your requested gold curtains.
And I say I want my microphone to match.
I want the microphone lead to be gold.
Also I want someone to turn around to me and say but is is
that not butter upon bacon? And I will really enjoy it and
then I will slap them. Eh.
Church bell, a talkative woman. You can definitely hear people
saying that she's a full of church bell myth.
Chuckaboo, a name given to a close friend.
Oh my God, that is cute. Hey Chuckaboo that I'm bringing
that back 100%. I'm calling every, I'm calling
everybody I see today for the next 4 hours.
Chuckaboo. I go to the garage.
He's like yes mate, I go yeah, diesel and pump 9 there
Chuckaboo, what do you say? Diesel pump 9 Chuckaboo, thank
you. Can I have diesel, full tank of
diesel? And then could you just give me
like 6 litres of diesel on the side?
And then he's going to go. But is that not butter upon
bacon? I go.
Let me see. The Desi age, A phrase mean an
elderly because it makes the spectator giddy to think of the
victim's years. The term refers to a maiden or
other woman. Canvas by other maiden.
Oh, meaning like they're so old if you actually got to their
age, it'll leave you. Does it?
Yeah. It's kind of funny.
He's a desi age doing the bear, a courtship that involves Hogan.
I think doing the bear in 2020 means something entirely
different. And I mean, Hogan definitely is
part of it. Doing the bear.
I mean, I think if I hit it off with someone like, you know,
male friend and I was like, listen, do you fancy doing the
bear? I think they might think that
was an invite for Dave Elliott to get involved.
Another phrase is don't sell me a dog.
Popular until 1870, this phrase meant don't lie to me.
Apparently people who sold dogs back in the day were prone to
trying to pass off much as purebreds here.
Don't you sell me a dog. Sold the pup.
You've been sold the pup.
But that sounds cute. Pups are cute and sold the pup.
I've never heard that don't sell me a dog lesson.
Don't sell me a dog here. A door knocker is a type of
beard formed by the cheeks and chin being shaved, leaving a
chain of hair under the chin and upon each side of the mouth,
forming A moustache. Something like a door knocker.
Craig David had a door knocker back in the day.
Fly rink an 1850. An 1875 term for a polished bald
head. Some fly rink on your mouth.
Do you want to hug a bear? A gal sneaker is a man devoted
to seduction. I'm a gal sneaker dog.
Umm. Giggle mug.
A habitually smiling face. All right.
Giggle mug. Umm.
My dad's called. Someone give him more.
Definitely. Yeah.
In fact, that's his name for me and my fucking an excellent word
that means getting ready in the streets, mafucking.
You're going my fucking mental in the streets.
If something's absolutely preposterous, you say, make a
stuffed bird laugh, right? Oh my.
Oh no. This 1883 term for a policeman
is so much better than peg mutton shunter.
Mutton shunter. Mutton shunter does sound very
dirty. Someone who takes the day trip
to the beach. He brings his own provisions and
doesn't contribute at all to the resort.
He says as a nose bagger, if someone's not well, they're not
up the deck. Well, yeah, it depends how sick
you are. But I know whenever I'm on the
weather or in bed with the flu, I'm definitely not up the deck.
Although to be fair, that is one of the things that will get me
up. Let me see if someone has a
prominent nose that can be said to have a parish pickaxe.
I don't know what that means. I don't know what that means,
but someone's getting called in the next door.
Oh no, no, there is a phrase here that's described as to
feel. This phrase means takes its rise
from rifle practise where the bad shot misses the black and
white target altogether and shoots into the earthbot, and
it's known as shoot into the brown.
So if I was to say to someone, do you want to hug the bear and
then shoot into the brown? Actually that would mean do you
want to have a hug? And then we could go to shooting
range to win. Something back in the day was
called take the egg to take the egg because that was the price.
Oh, if something was thoroughly understood, it could be known as
an humble constable, an humble comes double stumble, a term in
an inferior noisy singers that could be liberally today talked
about his karaoke sessions were whipper UPS.
They're whipper UPS because they're saying karaoke.
I mean, that's very, very, very enjoyable.
And I'll try and use these all in a sentence now.
Oh man, went out last night then.
Yeah, the place wasn't like the bar was good, but it wasn't
afternoon if I'd enough for me. But to be honest, I was orphan,
orphan orph. And yeah, listen, well, I would
have been more drunk, but I lined my stomach because I had a
few bags of mystery beforehand and well, they were nice.
They were they were buying up for the elephant.
But like, I to be honest, I lost a run of myself and sort of
throwing things around the bar and I actually went into the
toilets and body found. Yeah, because I was on, I was on
my banjo. So, yeah, when I went nuts and I
had some food there then, but it was by Roy Mutton.
And, you know, I was like, should I keep drinking?
But I thought that would be butter up bacon.
And I was just, I was pissed off because I had a church.
Bellamy here. I shouldn't say that she's a
chuckaboo, but it's a bit older than me.
She's a dizzy age. But then I left.
I went to, let's just say, a different barn, another side of
town. And I was doing the bear before
I knew it. And I swear to God, it was.
Do you believe me? Listen, I'm not selling you a
dog here. No, it was the fella I was, I
was with the, he had a door knocker and a fly rink.
And he was, I was, he was enjoying himself because he had
a giggle mug the whole time. And Oh, yeah, I mean, listen, me
and him went out after closing time and did a bit of my
fucking. And then we actually got scooped
by a mutton shelter. And then and then we were in the
sales all night. And in the morning he, he asked
me if there's anything else I wanted.
And I just had to be straight with him and say, listen, I'm
not up to deck here. And he said that was a real
shame. He said that was a real shame
because, you know, he wanted to take the egg.
And then I went out and just, you know, did a bit of singing
and we were just two whipper UPS.
There you go, guys. I think that was pretty
enjoyable that that Victorian slime.
So maybe that's what I could do. Maybe I could translate modern
day English into Victorian slime.
Very enjoyable. We have a load of questions here
from zippers. And OK, so Lacy yet says This is
why the ray of lockdown is ending.
Well, that's actually not a podcast question.
Yeah. Radio One have a new dance show
starting Friday nights at 6:00. Not good.
Absolutely not good. We're going to find out who is
behind that and we're, we're going to bring them down.
Don't you worry about that. Umm, Lawlesson says.
Who would win in a fight, a bear or a gorilla?
If you if you if you mean in this sort of coded sense, I
would say, well, hold on. What is a gorilla in the gay
community? Gorilla gay slime a silverback,
right. A silverback is an older, well
established gay man the praise and younger gay men.
It's also a sexual manoeuvre in which a man haven't already
fuck. Maybe I should have started this
urban dictionary won't let me open it.
That's how that's how rude that is.
And if we're talking like a straight up fight between a bear
or a gorilla, probably a bear because I think gorillas are
meant to be dead on because Attenborough was falling about
with a few once and having a good time and they didn't try
and attack them. But bears are.
I'd say a bear would be more of a dickhead than a gorilla,
definitely. So I'll go bear, but it depends
what sort of bear it is as well. I don't know, Reba says.
How much more insufferable do you think Connor keys will be?
Know that Facebook and Instagram have banned Q and on accounts
and no, I think Connor so Connor and Mickey do the I'm not.
Maybe we're talking about that chair and Young's podcast in
which they do talk a lot about it comes a lot of conspiracy
theories, but they don't like what would you say?
They don't like totally push the conspiracy And by the way,
there's loads conspiracy theories that they don't believe
as well, and but they don't like push their conspiracy theories
on people. So I don't think easy is anyway
is in any way an insufferable conspiracy theorist.
And also there's people who are just as insufferable that are
against conspiracy. They talk about how much they're
against conspiracy theories to the point where you're like, OK,
but Connor is very much someone who will chat about it with you
if you want to chat about it, but he's not like here.
You need to hear this and also shout out the KZ, Mickey and
James McKechnie because we got through limelight again last
week, General Panther Comedy Club and it was 10 out of 10.
Great. But I didn't know Facebook and
it's going with banking on accounts.
I don't know. I don't have time to look into
all that or really understand it.
I just know that the Internet seems like and get ready for the
broader statement you've ever heard.
Pretty mild place at the minute. Rory Arkin says if you were
stuck in an island and can only have one person with you, why
would it be Harry Styles? And it would be Harry Styles
because he's a chuckaboo. Simple as that.
Number one chuckaboo. Yeah, it would be enjoyable
being a desert island with with Styles because he's fun.
He's cute, he can sing watermelon sugar high, which I
really like. And I think we, I think we would
have a good time. I think we would have a good
time and let's leave it at that. And if if after he wanted to go
cycling with me, I would propose that we did it on the one bike.
Jared says not a question, but an apology.
I sent you a frankly deranged direct message on Saturday while
under the influence of pretty hardcore painkillers after a
procedure. I'm flogging myself daily as a
punishment. It didn't even make any sense.
Sorry, Mommy. And let's see What?
I'll not read the whole message in case it genuinely was
deranged, but I don't remember it being that bad.
Sure. I mean, definitely it won't be
the weirdest message I've received.
Oh, yeah, it's long before we get to that.
And George sent me a question last week that I could, I didn't
want to read out and I did talk about it was like, I'll need to
speak to him first. But he said that he had some
issues with the stomach and that I'm not general area for a
couple of years. And it came to the head when he
was in a lot of pain. He killed over and he thought it
was down to stress, but he lost a lot of blood, couldn't figure
out what it was, but basically on his way to hospital for an
endoscopy, which is where they put a camera down your throat.
He was on his way to Ultimate Galvin to get that done.
He listened to my podcast, would Call and Get Us and the Bill
where I describe what my chromes is like, and it sounded like I
was describing how he was feeling in every way for three
months. So he became like an old man and
had the layabout for a week. He went to the doctor with this,
played him the actual clip. So make no mistake, Gerard
Brawley was in Ultimate Galvin. Send a doctor listen to this and
then just play on the tea with me podcast.
And he said that that described his condition.
The doctor checked the small boy.
Hey presto, he has chromes. She used my discount code to
your chromes. Separate one will will get you
chromes. After years not having a
diagnosis, not being able to get treatment apart from blood
transfusions and iron infusions usually until help me get a
diagnosis and possibly save me from further years of being
sick. I owe you one.
You're not officially my hero. No, I didn't know whether George
just meant that because I'd written up under a shadow for
podcast questions. So I'd ask first, but he's OK
with me reading that out. But then yes, you did send me a
long message on Saturday. And I'm going to be honest with
you, it was while I was playing football.
You sent it at 1:40. But I enjoyed it.
I enjoyed it. And then essentially for, and
let's not overstate it for saving your life.
You have you said that your girlfriend or your partner made
made you buy me a Nando's gift card, which is a beautiful
gesture. But at the same time, if you
really thought it saved your life or you valuing your life
for like £30 because it should be at least a 50,000 LB Nando's
gift card, which I would make good use of over 3 days.
No, that's, that's very nice. I mean, you could've lied and
said it was your idea, but that is, that is very nice.
And anyone who has croons, can you send me another gift card
please, whether you've known about it for years or not,
because I would enjoy that. But Jared, don't worry about
sending me rambling messages. That's what that's what the
internet's for. Matthew Collins says why did why
did you spoil and why did you and the international superstar
and E Belfast hurler spoil the fall for me?
What else can you spoil? And I can spoil a lot of things,
honey. But yeah, I apologise.
We're talking about the fall. We might have given away a
little bit of a spoiler, but then again, we might have just
been doing like a little bit of a tease.
That actually isn't the thing because I used to know people.
I said, you've seen this film. They say I go, Can you believe
the guy dies? And then people will be like,
oh, and then they go to film the guy doesn't die and be like, I
love that you said that because I was expecting them to die.
But yeah, sorry. But that what else could I
spoil? I could spoil EastEnders depend
on where you're at in in where you're watching it from, because
if you're watching it from the start, like over lockdown, if
you started EastEnders at the start, let's just say dirty Dan
dies. But uh, does he?
I don't know. Leave it at that.
Leave it that have said too much.
Matthew Merlin. Glad I got to learn about buck
Alec. But what exotic animal would you
like as a pet? So let's see, Buck Alec had his
declawed D toothed lion. And what exotic animal would I
like as a pet? It depends.
Because I would want it for probably for practical reasons,
because I'm not really an animal guy.
So maybe I could see myself riding on an animal's back to
get the places. I think that would make a real
statement. But not like a horse, like a
Panther, Panther or something like a Wildcat.
Like I could see me on a wildcat's back and like just
showing up the business meetings and stuff like that.
I think that would be enjoyable if if it promised never to turn
on me because I would hate that, you know, if it eventually I
threw me off its back and at me. So yeah, probably like a Panther
or or a Wildcat, but not like the usual ones like a tiger or
the, you know, regular people have as pets.
Something majestic. Something majestic, definitely.
Or like a really, really sarcastic fat cat, you know, fat
cat who just has very sarcastic guys.
You know, you're like you OK and all.
And it's like, I'd like that like a big fat cat.
William Palmer says, Hey, Mr Beggles, would you rather not
wipe your wee bum for a week or would you rather not brush your
teeth for a week? Cheers, bro.
I think I could go awake without brushing my teeth because in the
morning it's not going to be good.
I'm probably last thing at night, it's not going to be
good. But during the day when you're
eating meals, when you're drinking tea, your your breath
is probably going to smell like whatever you drank or at.
So you know, if you have chewing gum and stuff, Jeez, it's a
horrible thought, but I would probably do that because if you
if you didn't wipe your bum for a week, it would be like that.
Would that wouldn't be ideal at all.
So I'll go with not brushing my teeth for a week.
And also my teeth are very white so I wouldn't I wouldn't worry
about discoloration or anything like that.
But it's a great question. As per do we have more questions
on Instagram? It's taking too long to load?
No, but we do on Twitter. Peter Lockhart, who would win in
a Royal Rumble of Northern Ireland politicians?
Honestly, I think like in the Royal Rumbles that I used to
watch in wrestling, it was a lot of times.
So when you wouldn't expect the winner or someone that was
making a return, like they've been injured for a year and they
would come back and they're like, I can't even believe this.
So I think the Royal Rumble of politicians would follow its
usual course. I think Arlene Foster would do
well. Michelle O'Neill would do well.
All the big known politicians. Ian PC Junior would like, he'd
like hide under the ring and then he'd come out towards the
end and try and like try and win the wee sneaky way.
But I honestly think it would be someone like David Trimble who
you wouldn't even think about anymore as a politician, but he
would just make his return at the last minute.
He'd be like the last entrant and he'd come out to music and
then I think he would go in because someone would think
they'd won and they'd be celebrating like Jerry Kelly or
Alex Maskey. And then David Trimble would
just come out from behind and and he would win.
So, yeah, someone who someone who's been there and done it.
Or then again, the the big oil, Jerry Adams who know, you know,
with it, he looks like a big oil.
And I there is one particular poster they used to Jerry Adams
like a billboard. I mean, Dave Elliott just always
called the big oil. So I would say the big oil would
have a chance to I think he would win and then I think he'd
deny and he'd deny what he was ever in the Royal rifle.
The most played out you ever I've done in stand up.
But so yeah, I'd say I'd say one of the old one of the old school
people. Stephen McCall says we clearly
have a lot of talented comedians here in Northern Ireland.
Why aren't more invited? The TV panel shows?
Is there a lack of representation?
Yeah, I'd agree with you. I think the quality of stand up
comedians here on the stand up scene by and large is very good,
really good actually, especially in like the last four years.
So why aren't more invited the TV panel shows?
I don't know. It's a very good question.
Like they, they, there is a lot more of a focus now on
representation in TV and film, but they, they would they
prioritise more, I guess gender to get, they prioritise more
ethnic backgrounds and stuff. So I don't know if there's a
push really for should you know, should they get someone from
Northern Ireland on or whatever. Personally, I don't think I
would like to be asked to do something if I thought I was
just being asked to do it because I'm from here.
But that doesn't mean I wouldn't do it.
I would 100% do it, but it would be nice to think I'm being asked
to do that because they think I'd be really good on it.
So I don't think there, there's comedians here that I know of
anyway, like calling for it or trying to start, you know, a
conversation about that. I, I don't know.
It's good quite I I think on the likes of say Mock the Week or
Would I Lie to You or Qi. I think there are comedians from
here that would do that would do really well on it.
But I don't know. We're we're kind of our own
little scene here, which is good and bad, even to the point where
comedy clubs here will get Dublin comedians on the scene.
They're doing the headline And but it doesn't really, I don't
really think it works that much the other way a little bit, like
a little bit. But you, you know, we have just
our own scene and I love it. But it would be good.
Of course, it'd be good to do more stuff.
Like I did a show this week stand up for live comedy, which
was BBC Three online. And then it was on BBC One on
Monday night there Monday night. And, and that was brilliant
because it was, it was the first like me and BBC thing that I've
done. You know, I've done a lot of
stuff for BBC Northern Ireland, which obviously get gets shown
here, but that was the first big thing I've done and the best
thing of all time was Nick Knowles, DIY TV presenter guy
was like, hey man, you stole the show, enjoyed it.
Keep up the good work. I was like, fuck, I like that's
so funny to me that Nick Knowles was like well done player.
I real now. I followed him on Twitter and I
was like, I'll send like a message here when he follows me
and I'll say like, Nick, thanks for me.
I appreciate it. And Nick just he didn't want he
didn't follow me or anything. He's just like, I'm going out of
my way to let you know I enjoyed it but don't and don't contact
me again. And there's something I really
liked about that. But that was that was on like
the the main BBC and yeah, you know, there was, there was 4
comedians on to from here to to not from here.
I originally thought the idea was because the the film in
Bristol, London, Glasgow and Belfast.
I think I might have got wrong, but I thought it would just be
people from the comedy scene there.
But I think they moved people around and had different people
in different places. But it was really nice to be
asked to, to do that. And yeah, I'd love to do more
stuff and I think we should. But.
But then there's also a thing here.
We don't push yourself a lot, myself included.
We're very like, I know I joke at times about, you know, being
a being cocky and stuff, but we are a humble comedy scene as
well for the most part. So people don't want to be like,
I should be doing this, you know, because I, they're
especially in like London or big cities, there are very driven,
ambitious comedians who are like, I'm just going to ask to
do everything. We're a little bit like
embarrassed about that usually, myself included, James Wilkinson
says. Who's your favourite footballer
that you filmed with? Loved the old videos with the
Northern Ireland players, like Patty with his coach and Connor
with the toy trains. Thanks very much.
They were always great crack to film fair football film with.
The most enjoyable one was probably Patty with his coach.
Patty McNair up in Ballyclare, obviously from the famous song.
Patty McNair from Ballyclare, Patty McNair from Ballyclare
going up. And then that was class because
we just had like a whole afternoon there messing about.
The best thing of the videos, honestly, I'm not, I swear to
God, I'm not just saying this. When you do videos with the
Northern Ireland players, they're all a joy to do because
you find that they're like, if you haven't filmed with them
before, they're a bit nervous and they're like, you know, the
IFA or like he says he's up for doing this, but maybe he
wouldn't be up for doing that. And you know, what do you want
to ask him? And then as soon as you start
filming and you make it clear that like, I'm not going to make
it that good, you like, we'll just have a laugh.
Then they're all like, let's let you know.
They're then suggesting stuff and they're like, we could get a
shot of this and on. Why don't we talk?
It's always a pleasure to do them because I love football.
It's brilliant. But Paddy McNair 1 was great.
Liam Boyce, Loch Ness Monster, cult classic, really enjoyable.
Luther Valentine Thoughts on scented bum roll?
A scam to get more coin out of us or a true luxury?
Both, unequivocally both. But what sort of scent do you
want? You know what I mean?
Like a vanilla or Raspberry? I don't know, I didn't know it
was a thing, but. But of course it is because
everything is the thing. LMJ says Eddie Hearn rings you,
says you're going to main event in the Odyssey sold out arena to
fight Arlene or Michelle. Who are you picking?
Eh, neither, neither. No way.
I don't think it would be enjoyable either way because it
it's, it would never be enjoyable to be violent towards
a woman and it wouldn't be enjoyable if Arlene and Michelle
kicked the shit out of me. So no one, no one wins.
Well, they, they, they would probably win, but no, I wouldn't
enjoy that. I'd prefer to just do stand up.
P says What time is it at the current time?
Recordings 4:15 Gary Crawford, Do you think Harambe was
justifiably killed? There was a baby in the pen and
then in the zoo thing. And they were like, I don't
think he's going to hurt her, but she'll be.
I mean, yeah, if it was my baby, yeah, I'd be thanking them for
doing it. But at the same time,
heartbreaking because Harambe was just seemed like a real,
real nice guy. So justifiable, yes.
Tragic, yes. Jamie Mckevitt.
Do you think you could do a better?
Job at centre back from Man United than Harry McGuire could
do. Sometimes I think it could, but
then other times I realise that I can't really play football and
they bought him for £80 million. So probably I couldn't do a
better job. But I would like, I think it
would be banter. Like if Man United name me in
the starting team for a Premier League game, I think I would
have a lot of fun. Not day like if they rang me up
and they're like fancy it, I'd go yeah, so it would be
something fun. Just Jade says if tea was wiped
off the planet, what would be your next beverage of choice and
would you rename the podcast with it?
Coffee with me probably exists. I would I would probably just go
for coffee next. But that.
But if tea was wiped out the planet, I think I'd be like the
cutting them on the Titanic and I go down with it.
I think I would just go down. In a delicious.
Sea of tea, and it'd be a nice way to go, Hazel says.
Will you be? Allowed to go out trick or
treating this year. And I don't think so.
All that sly kids probably aren't going to be able to trick
or treat. See one year whenever I went
trick or. Treating I remember making. £25
and I was about four and it was the best time ever.
Although there was times too when you were young and you had
like a big mind to shrapnel like 10P2P20P S and you had a food
thing of it and you thought it was about 6 grand and then your
dad counted up for you is like you made four points.
They were great times. But no, I still will go out.
But I'll just be using a card reader this time and I don't use
a mask or anything. I go out and I say justice for
Harambe. Can you donate?
And then people boot hit the pin and it's just straight into my
account. Mark Graham says when you.
Join in the waffle. Irish League Football podcast
and unfortunately I'm not, I might do an episode with them,
but we have talked on this podcast before or we've been
asked to do an Irish League spin off because we always get asked
with the Irish League. So we might do a small run of
episodes about the Irish League. But hopefully we can be a friend
of the Waffle podcast and not an enemy Andrew, if we were
enemies. We would have to settle up a
game of. Five set at midnight some night
in Tesco car park Andrew Mcquillan What's the meaning of
life and are we alone in the universe?
The meaning of life is to live, laugh, love, live, laugh, love
and are we alone in the universe we are not because the Lord
Jesus Christ is also with us, Daniel toll says.
Daniel Toll says Daniel tolls cheeky, he says.
Was Paddy Ralph upset? You were on the stand up for
live comedy gig after you copied this Nigel character.
Yeah, probably. Probably.
And I want to publicly apologise, so I don't know.
Yeah, I. Would I would say so.
I would say so, but then, but look, look, I've apologised.
The Mike Mcgulder character, he might not be coming back.
He might not be coming back. But yes.
Was he annoyed? I don't think so.
But to be honest, at that gig I
wouldn't have even noticed if he was because I was a cheeky I was
a boy at a birthday party who is allowed to drink a can of Coke
at the birthday party and then says he hasn't had one yet.
So he gets a second one and then a third.
So I was like a wee boy at a birthday party waiting to go on.
I was giddy. I was probably laughing at my
jokes more or if not as much as the audience.
And some people hit that right. Why you laughing at your own
jokes? And I'm like, hey, baby, because
good stuff. So I was having a good time.
So I don't, I don't know if he was annoyed about that, but but
it's certainly something, something you could ask him.
I'm not too sure. But yeah, I, I stole the
character, but I basically there was a legal action that I lost.
And so I know I have to pay maintenance for that.
I pay acre on the month basically to lease the Mike
McGoldrick character, which is fun because I, I, yeah, I rent
them and then after four years, I, I have to decide whether I
want to buy McGoldrick outright or trade them for a different
character. I'm not too sure.
But you're very cheeky, boy. And you know that Johnny
Dempster says if you could be a flying a wall, what wall would
you choose? Fantastic question.
And I would choose the. What people are like?
What about the Oval Office? I'd like to see how to make, I'd
like to be in a room where people make TV's or like talk
about TV's because I, I just realised the other day, I don't
know how TV's work. Like how does, how does a
picture be on on your TV in the house?
Like what's the technology to get ATV on, if you know what I
mean? Like Radio 2.
Like. I know it's waves or something
but. How does it be on the?
Needle grabs the sound from the grooves.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We watched a documentary on
that, didn't we? It was a standard Roy Scoville
standard. Special about how.
How microphones work needles and grooves or an OK and says what's
a verdict on the unreleased from Goldrick material?
Does it exist or can it be like into the detox album never
released by doctor Dre and D12 that in reality in reality
literally doesn't exist. Was there unreleased from
Goldrick material? Oh well, you can say Mike.
Says hi. Umm.
Was there unreleased from Gold I I that totally escapes me at the
minute. It could be Nigel probably did
something that was really terrible.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Has there been a sketch, a film that's been worked which is
never released? I mean, Honest McGoldrick did a
podcast episode. Podcast episode the day lockdown
happened. Really.
We did it, redid it and then decided never to.
Yeah. Because we were so scared about
what was going to happen or I don't actually know.
I don't know. It could have.
It could have been somebody. Else Patrick Quinn, final
question, what's been your most beautiful moment as a father so
far? Well done.
The recent stand ups smashed it. As always Patrick, thank you as
always, BJIC, Bijic, Belfast guy and China.
What's been the most beautiful moment as a father so far?
This sounds very. Cheesy, but every moment's good.
Every moment's good, even if it's like a trivial normal
thing. It's brilliant.
And actually the other day last week, I am.
I am wary about how much I talk about it because I do see it as
a very, very personal thing. But earlier in the week.
I put on a song. Sometimes I will put on songs
that I know make me feel emotional, but I almost like
want to feel that. And I was just like messing
about with them in the house. And there is a particular song
that is kind of like about fatherhood that is that is
really beautiful. And I put it on.
I was like, ah, this nice song and this a nice moment and then
I just burst into tears. But it was like, I was like
happy, you know what I mean? Like I was like overcome with
joyous emotion. And I like it was beyond
smiling. So that's why I cried.
And then the worst thing is the baby saw that I was crying and
can't really obviously tell the difference between happy tears
and solid tears. And then he started crying.
And at the start I was like, he's crying happy tears too.
And I was like, no, he's crying sad tears because he thinks
someone's upset me and I'm crying.
So at the end of the day, we were both crying.
But even that was a nice moment. And and yeah, there's just
sometimes where I'm just like totally in all.
And by the way, I'm being serious, I did just, I did just
burst into tears because there's moments you just don't know how
to describe. And it's it's beyond, it's
beyond anything you've experienced before.
So, yeah, just there are just silly, trivial moments like
going out for a walk in the prom and just looking at each other
and like smiling, like that kind of stuff is just the best.
SO it's all, it's all great. It's all great.
And I want to. Yeah.
I just want to finish by by saying that I hope this podcast
has been afternoonified by everybody.
I think we should call this episode We're called Butter Up
Bacon. It feels like it should be
called. Butter up bacon.
Butter upon bacon. I do apologise.
That was an afternoon fight. Afternoon fight enough for you.
And but yeah, there's been a lot of fun.
There's been a lot of fun. I appreciate you listening.
Watching. If you listen to the audio
version, you want to see the video version?
It's on YouTube. It's put up there by
michaelfoster.tv. And weirdly, that is his name.
His first name, his first name, all one word is Michael Foster.
And his second name is Dot. TV Middle name Dot.
Middle. Middle name Dot.
Like Dot Cotton. Oh, Jim, And that's just what it
is. So thanks so much for listening
patreon.com/tea with me podcast. You want to support the podcast?
Get the bonus episode on a Monday, check out the live
episode zippers. Thank you very much.
Goodbye God. Bless and.
Wait and wait and see us next week, Chuckaboos.