I'm Michael. Che and I'm Colin Jose, and
we've got a little secret. Actually, it's a pretty big
secret. Well, now you got to give the
people something. I'm not saying a word.
Oh, then people will know to tune in.
Come on, tell them a little. Like how we're hosting of comedy
events streaming only on Peacock?
Exactly. How it's called New York After
Dark and it's a comedy show that only features drop in comic.
Boom, you nail. Into Michael Chase phone
numbers. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Hey, hey, hey. New York After Dark.
It's some kind of comedy thing, and it's streaming now only on
Peacock. You love it.
Good evening stalkers and welcome.
It's Seppers. Seppers.
Slippers welcome. Yeah, welcome to the Tea with me
podcast. You guys are probably looking in
or listening in depending on where you get in this podcast
and going. Where is the young big eared,
long fingered freak guy shit And why are we replacing him with
such a hunky cute guy like myself?
And the truth of the matter is, is because it's Shane's birthday
podcast. Now normally you would think for
us a special birthday surprise and it would be completely off
the cuff and a surprise. Well, Shane wanted to host his
own surprise podcast. But you know what, myself and
producer Dan decided, no, we're not having it.
So we're basically hijacking his podcast.
I'm actually here not drinking tea.
I'm drinking coffee because I'm a maverick.
So what's going to happen? Shane is sitting waiting.
He thinks he's coming in to introduce the podcast, but he's
going to be in for a surprise when he sees we've already
started. So Dan, do you want to just
bring him on in here? Here he comes.
Hey, oh. No.
It is. Oh shit, oh, is this?
Are we in it or are we? We haven't.
Started yet? Yeah, no, man, we we've started,
we've been introduced. I wanted.
To try and do a background. We have been on for about 10
minutes and and welcome to your own podcast.
Welcome to This is Your Life. Well, your your podcast welcome,
no. I'm trying to do a virtual
background. I've literally brought my own
green screen. Why is this not working?
Why do you look like something? Oh no, well, I'm not spoiled
what the background was going to be for you guys.
The only guy, anyway. Well, well, welcome to your
podcast. How you feel.
Leave it warm there. Why am I?
Why am I nervous? I mean, look, this is this is
new to me. Again, I just want to say off
the bat, it's kind of, it's the only way I could have got onto
your podcast because you've been running now for about 5 months
or whatever and haven't asked me to be on your best friend, your
sidekick of the boy town podcast.
And for some reason never invited me.
So I just thought, you know, because your birthday, I
hijacked the podcast. Well.
I've got, I've got a little bit of beef to serve up to you.
I don't know how you like it, but here it is.
It's, I feel like it might be Wellington and I don't know why,
but you said to me, Dave, that I was going to have something to
open for today. And as always, my gift has not
arrived. Dave's catch phrase, by the way,
is it's on its way. Listen, I'm going to say
something here. You've made this up.
I didn't. They told me there was a gift.
Yeah, but I wasn't gone. Did you tell me there?
Was going to be a gift. Someone promised me a gift.
OK, OK. Where is it?
It was from one of our guests, but actually our next guest, our
first guest for the show that he's going to send you something
so you can take it up with him when he arrives.
Couple. Of things I want to say off the
bat, number one, I don't, I thought I would have gifts to
open and secondly, I'm expecting top quality guests here.
Like, I don't want to predict anything, but I'm thinking like
Dornan, Bill Burr, Mick Jagger, Adele.
That's the sort of level I'm at. Like genuinely, I don't know
anything about this. I don't like that you 2 are
hosting this podcast. I really dislike that a lot.
And I dislike both your hairs because you both look like
you've come out of the Amazon rainforest having fled cocaine
barons in Columbia. I mean, I think we look like
like the back, like I look like the bassist and he looks like
the drummer out of an Offspring tribute band.
That's how I feel like we look at the minute.
You've got to blow my hair and I've just got a fathead and.
I was going to say I was going to say the Rayleigh offspring
but that's potentially shit as banter of.
Yeah, yeah. I mean, apart of the best down
so far has been when you put a green screen behind you and then
upload an image to your actual face.
That's been the best, but they're locked down so.
I mean, the difficult thing about that is you've got to
think of the admin of me bringing the green screen down
the stairs. Like it's massive and it's
really hard to card about. Yeah, I.
Love it. Yeah.
I mean, this is what I was trying to.
You can sort of sense my vibe, I think.
Yeah, I can. I can definitely get a feel for
it for sure. But it's not a great look there
for me. Oh shit, wait a stop.
OK, I'm back in. Oh.
This guy is ruining us. OK, so how many guests?
You know that that does. That's totally irrelevant.
You don't need. If you're poor mad, I swear to
God you're poor mad. You're like that guy in Captain
Phillips. It wasn't Tom Hanks, the
captain. Yeah, yeah.
And that's how I feel because I'm, I'm on your ship and hey,
I'm the captain, so. I have to ask you this, Dave,
because you're on the podcast before we get into whatever you
guys are going to do. And hey, I'm happy.
Just it wouldn't be the first time I've taken a backseat.
A big number of guys just do their thing on me.
But Dave, I got to ask you because you're my guest in the
podcast. Do you drink tea?
I do drink tea, yes. But as I was saying earlier in
my introduction, I'm a maverick. So hey, I'm drinking black
coffee. No milk, no spicy strong black
coffee on the TV podcast. Because this is what anarchy is
all about. All right.
Well, I'm very keen to see these guys.
I'm expecting big hitters based. So here's the thing.
Right, here's the thing. OK, I just want to want to sort
of tamper expectations. But here, let's just put it like
this. Say there's a lot of big fish.
Hope you've caught me a lot of
big fish. In the pond, I'm a fisherman.
I put she and Todd's birthday on on on a rowie end of my hook.
Yeah, I cast it to a lot of of a listers.
Yeah. And I mean, a lot of those fish
just kind of went, I've eaten, you're all right.
So I did, I had to take my wand. And is that what they call it?
The fish have? You ever put your deck in the
river lagging? Again, yes, unless you say the
lagging is not that fruitful. So I mean, you know, I call 1
fish basically, right? One fish and I'll give you one
guess as to who that fish is and if you guess.
I'm going to be extremely pissed off if it's Aaron Butler.
If it's Aaron Butler, I'm going to be.
Pissed off I. Mean, I mean that guy.
First of all, what were you guys talking about for the last 10
minutes from my intro? Because I'm keen to know what
that's about. Dan, you want a bad word about
me since we. Should turn your game down a
little bit. You're popping a lot.
Yeah, I am popping fucking. Just be, you know, the way you
always tell me to be a wee bit quieter.
Just be. This is great.
Normally when we do the radio, you can tell them back.
Dave, lower your voice, Dave, talk a bit quieter.
And now I'm on your own podcast telling you, and it's pretty.
It's a feeling I have never felt more powerful as to this is just
what I wanted. So just hush hush, little boy.
And they'll call me little boy and.
This is a joy experience. So you had that, Dan had a
pretty big question there that I think you were deflected from.
So, Dan, do you want to? Do that again really about how
this podcast came about the way that a surprise birthday podcast
for yourself that I mean, neither me or Dave came up with
the idea for whose idea was it? Look, I was thinking of the
people because whenever it's, you know, a major star's
birthday, a lot of fans like to celebrate.
In some cases, they even have a national day for that person.
So I don't know if that's something Storm wanted to do.
I'm kind of just starting the ball because everyone probably
thinks I'd be too embarrassed to have this sort of birthday
podcast. So this is my way of letting you
guys know. Like lesson, it's grand.
Dave, what is that? Your phone ring?
I don't know what it is is I have like a lot of people in in
a brass band coming in to play some tunes later and I just
accidentally dropped my phone onto the kettlebell.
So ignore that. Oh, you got sorry Bell.
Sorry, fucking. Weird flex.
Look, this came about because everybody wanted to put on a
birthday podcast for me, so I'm excited.
OK, well I guess with that being said, I mean, we should probably
bring on the 1st guest, you know, the the first and only
guest to the podcast, the one person who replied positively
and said listen, I want to jump in guys, welcome.
Oh no. No, I.
I. Specified I didn't want Aaron
Butler. To be some of the surprise, all
I'm going to say is he definitely looks like Joe
Exotic's husband with with his teeth fixed like that's not.
There we go. I we're good.
Well.
Oh, we've got a lot to, we've got a lot to digest here.
I mean, one of them is yes, he looks like the only guy who
break in the Joe Exotic zoo and try it on with Joe.
You know what I mean? Like and say.
Like and Joe does use. This guy be outside gaol being
like he didn't do it. So I'll say that first of all.
Secondly, I'm going to say he hate the way he's drinking that
I I there's a lot of despise about his current look.
Thirdly, what I hate is, you know, OK, that picture of me
isn't the best one. That's when I lost so much
weight with Crohn's disease. I nearly died and my lips
swelled up. But by the way, I was in
Tenerife when I took that and I thought that looked really sweet
at the time and I was in a muscle fit ulcer rugby shirt.
So imagine that and fuck you guys.
I mean, what are you doing in that picture?
Like what? What?
What are you doing with your lips?
I think I'm. Just getting Botox.
I think I'm just trying not to die.
What had happened is my face had swollen but my lips stayed.
No, my face had like sunken but my lips stayed the same size.
So. My lips actually aren't bigger
than my face face. And head just got small.
Ignore the size of everything in that photo.
Obviously the ears are still cretinously large, but what is
the expression you're doing? And I think I was trying to show
like, hey, it's all good. I think I just come out of
hospital and it was like a relaunch of the of the money
toad and. Yeah.
Looking back on it, do I think I look sweet?
Then no, I don't. But at the time I think I look
pretty good and we've all made mistakes.
And also, Aaron, stop drinking like that please.
Who's drinking? Like what was you talking about?
It's so annoying. It's it's it's so annoying.
I mean, literally, I couldn't wish to spend my birthday with
three other guys that aren't Jews.
You know, I pardon. I despise this.
This is like, this is like whenever you you throw like, you
know, some sort of party and you're waiting for like the cool
guys in the office to arrive and these three guys have shown up
early. You know, you guys were there,
hang on 7:00 and I've organised the party.
He also has that chain because he was doing a sketch and what
happened is he ordered the chain, it quickly wrote a sketch
and now he just continues to wear.
Stop slurping Mr. Is it me? Is it me slurping?
You're slurping and sorry. Guys.
When when we're on the tea podcast, the tea podcast, it's
a. Tea with me podcast.
You fucking know what it's? Called the tea guy.
Is that some kind of, some kind of of like, I don't know,
foreign tea that you've distilled?
Is that like, is that what you call it here, that you call it
like a like a fresh tea, like a mint tea or like a chamomile or
something? What is?
No, he's drink. Tell us about tea.
He's drinking cordial. He's at 100% drinking cordial.
No, no, no, guys. Is this not?
Is this not Cranberry with me? With Shane Todd?
Is this not Cranberry with me? Sorry, Wayne Todd.
Sorry. My bad.
Wayne Tude looks like you. You can't spell man.
Oh, you guys are clearly 2 up and coming top writers.
Yeah, yeah, really. You guys really, really good.
Also, I'm pissed off because I didn't know it said Tude.
I thought it was just Wayne thought.
And I'm doubly annoyed that it says Wayne Tude.
And if anybody thinks it's funny, if any fucking zippers
think it's really funny to write on their videos, big fan of
Wayne to it or whatever. Like if anyone starts calling me
that, you 2 are to blame. In fact, you're you're more to
blame than do you know what this is?
Than you're like my mum who's left bad boys from school come
round for a sleepover and I'm not friends with them.
You know what you know what I mean?
Like these are the. They already want to accept the
invitation. It's.
Surprising. And bring on the next guest.
It wouldn't it would have been worse if you had of, you know,
come on. And being like like that, who do
we have? And just you and him, You know,
Kitty would have been an advert contractually obliged to be
there. And obviously us too.
I just ask you and obviously you have your your audience here,
your fans, the suckers. What is it about them?
They're not called the suckers. That no, they are what?
What do you engage with them with in this podcast?
Because I've said it down like I hate you, so don't really
anything more than over and above what I have to do with
you. I don't listen to the podcast,
so why? What is it that you think I
should become a sucker on the tea podcast?
And the first of all, they're not called suckers.
I think it's pretty disrespectful that you would
call them not they're called sippers.
I know just call them that because they they actually
listen to you. So I mean, I assumed there's
something not quite right with them and.
This must be weird for you because being in this room like
your solo podcast kind of does get this amount.
This is like you could do this room and your whole
listenership. Would get that was that was very
good, very, very. Fast there.
Nobody saw that one comment. Did you see a comment?
Did you get? No, It was very quick.
Yeah. Well done.
Great. Great question there.
Guys, where is he? Is he, is he in the room?
Is he waiting? I think, I think that, you know,
I mean, if we only had to save that for like another 5 minutes,
you know, but they're for that, you know, we'll come back that
when we're announcing the next the next guest.
I wonder who that is? Ray Mears.
Well. Yeah, well, listen, the TV's me
podcast is definitely taken off. Dave, thanks a lot for I know
you are a skipper and I know that you're not one of these
guys who wants to be like a note stepper, but it's time to come
out of that T chest baby and just be a sipper because you
know, we are. I'm not, but I mean, I respect
those guys, you know, no way. Sometimes people are ours.
They, they identify certain things and you're like, you
know. You you do.
You and I'll do me, baby, you know I don't disrespect it, but
you do your own thing. That's how I feel with zippers.
They're kind of not my cup of tea, but respect to them and.
When are you releasing? When are you releasing your?
Flag Podcast, my Slag podcast, It's it's already released.
It's always. It's gone already, Yeah.
Right, right. Just doing, just doing like a
soft release. I mean, I don't know what that's
that even again, listen, you, I know this is.
Not is it weird you could is it weird you could do a listening
party for yours in NSL micro? Yeah, I mean, because this is
the thing it plays over radio, you know?
I mean, you can technically do that.
You're a banter today. I know you've been called Guard.
Let me just say. Let me just say, cut this stuff
out because he's he's bars himself here.
And let me just say. OK, go, let's go.
Let him just say go ahead. This one actually wasn't based
toward you. I was going to say, I don't know
why Aaron Butler's laughing because the guy spending a grand
building the podcast studio and did three of them.
So I don't know what his involvement is in this.
Guys, you know, I'm more of a, more of a, I'm trying to think
of the term here. Yeah, I'd be more of a podcast
pervert. Like I don't like to have my
own. I'm like the Epstein of
podcasts. I like to just be in the
background, you know, sort of rubbing shoulders, a few guys,
but not quite in the forefront of, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah, I mean, I, I do get that. And and how do you feel coming
on as a guest on this podcast? Do you feel like?
No, Aaron, it's my birthday. So what's what's your favourite
thing about me? I.
Don't know, there's probably a few things.
Maybe it was when we first met that.
No second thing. Second thing I would say I I my
favourite thing about you. Second thing about you is that
you have, you have, you've Crohn's disease and I think
you're a great, you're a great ambassador for Crohn's disease.
Like they couldn't better than Someone Like You.
Why do we look like 2 guys in that picture that go to adopt A
kid like in the same sex couple and they don't even let us
through the door and we're pissed off?
Yeah, or just two young offenders, really.
Yeah. I mean you definitely.
Young offenders are fashion. This guy knows.
Right. Genuinely, if he was coming on,
he'd be the biggest name on this on this podcast.
He would be the. Biggest name guest.
If he came on and said you fucking love your teases anyway,
don't you? You.
Love your birthdays. Happy birthday mate, Evan said.
Evan said. Happy birthday.
Nobody has. So appreciate.
It There you go. There you.
Go I hate, I hate, I hate to break the 4th wall but it's not
actually your birthday until tomorrow.
So I I am very strict. I don't wish people birthday.
You nearly said good birthday. And you know, you know, you said
good birthday. You can ask.
You can actually ask Aaron himself.
I didn't even wish him happy birthday on his birthday.
I waited until the disaster his birthday, albeit I did think his
birthday was on that date but that's near.
Here nor there. Hey, good birthday.
Yeah, 31st of December. Good New Year.
Yeah. That's it's fair if that's what
you want to do, you know, you by all means do that man.
And I mean you. You've already organised your
good fries. Well, that doesn't work.
That that does work. So it does work.
That's. Just the way it is so.
I thought you would be nice to me on my birthday.
You're coming on. Clearly you want to roast me or
whatever. I get it.
Like, I get it, you've got sexual frustration or whatever,
but do you not want to be like nice to me?
Like I think it'd be really nice if you just told the listeners
and told us in this room. Like also that's so funny
because it looks like that guy's behind iron and he hasn't
really. Liked yet but Dave.
Maybe you could maybe you could talk about some of the things
you really like about me. I'll just, I'll have to go into
my emails here and check the e-mail you sent me to the list
of the things. All you got nice is like working
together for a couple of months. Surely it's exceeded your
expectations and maybe you want to just talk about him, how
professional I am. Why is Dan in the shadows?
Well. Always in the shadows aren't.
That's where he is. If you want to find him, that's
where you get him. He's just a silhouette.
He looks like he's proper crime. Watching it tonight, if there's
anyone here that should be, it's the guy's the cranberry juice
somewhere I guess. Dan, what's your favourite thing
about Shane? Yeah, his technical knowledge
always a *. Aaron, I brought the green
screen down from upstairs and then I tried to turn it turn it
on and I saved the picture and I was like, oh, the guys are going
to love this now tell me where I'm going wrong because it's.
Working. No man, that's it.
Hey nailed it. Here's what you need to do.
You need to use the we colour dropper on virtual background
and select the green behind you see the we colour dropper?
It should be like a wee thing in the right corner the.
Oh yeah. That's where you're going wrong.
You click out that that says. Choose virtual background.
Go up there should be, so hold on when you do.
I'm sure all the listeners are loving this, so I go.
Into settings and virtual background.
No, this is important. Yeah, virtual background and.
Then doesn't, I mean doesn't require.
Is this the sort of content you wanted for this special edition?
This was this. OK, no.
Forget. It.
Forget it, Butler. Could you go back a couple of
background images here? Oh, do you want me to?
Do you want me to get that? Let me.
See where this is going? Yeah.
Let me let me guess here. Hold on, is that the one?
Yeah, stop there, right. We have another guest and he's
in the waiting room and I just think he's bringing in.
We think that we invite him on in.
Welcome, Chris. How are you?
Well what's awkward about this is you brought in my real best
friend Dave. Go fuck yourself.
This man right here. I refer to him as my Scottish
best friend for a long time, but that was a fucking lie.
He's my international best friend #1.
Guy International. Chris MacArthur Boyd, phenomenal
comedian, great guy, has only good things to say about me.
Absolutely brilliant lad. So I'm delighted you have them
on. Honestly, if I could do Boy Town
with one person, the Boy Town podcast, it'd be this guy right
here. But international restrictions
prevented. Great to see you man Love you.
How's it going, man? Christopher MacArthur Boyd today
we should call it that. Yeah, I tried to do a virtual
background Chris and this haven't, so no.
Why is that? You actually look less like an
alien. Well, I mean, I think the
question should be less why is that happened?
And the question should be more how is it possible?
Also the fact that I have a proper green screen behind me.
But but you know, it's all good. Chris, are you looking at us or
are you also playing FIFA? Yeah, I'm playing.
We better. We found a bike.
I'll move my. I'll move my.
I really want to look into your eyes.
Sorry if that's but I. Said.
Yeah, Chris, Chris, Dave got extremely jealous whenever you
and I met because I was like, I've met this great guy.
Galway Comedy Festival. You and I went Scott shopping
for scarf. Sorry, I'm just nervous.
If I could say them again. I'm.
Shopping man. We went scarf shopping.
Yeah, honestly, like you gave me more in that day than Dave has
in about four years of friendship.
It was moved. We'd definitely be friends for
longer than that. I wouldn't really count that
kind of time, but but but Chris, it's so great to see a great
comedian in this room as well, because I was thinking like,
when is a proper stand up going to arrive for me to chat to?
And oh, it's so good to have you here, man.
So good to have you. Thanks very much, Dave and
Aaron, 2 gigs as well. So how you doing?
Yeah, I'm all right, man. I'm fucking losing my mind over
lockdown and shit. All right, Kate, Dan, take.
Take him out. Take him.
I don't want to start. Chris and Dave, do you know each
other? Yes.
We had the Nandos. We went to Nandos together and
then we've kind of just been texting since.
So Nah, yeah, this is, this is what we actually were doing a
bit of FaceTime and stuff earlier ourselves, just getting
prepped for it. So.
Dave got Dave got really carried away and the Nando's really
trying to make me laugh because Chris was there and he was
making me laugh. Dave got it.
Dave ordered a full chicken just to put on his deck.
And I was like, man, that's not funny.
Like it's not funny at all. But yeah.
Vagina didn't. You.
I took the chicken and the doggy back.
Down windows for myself esteem though, man, you know when when
when you have two men fighting over your affection.
It's just. Yeah.
Chris, what you say like? Faction.
It sounds quite like that. Maybe it's just a Scottish
accent. The word kind of he is slightly.
Right Chris, what do you like about me the most man?
Let's just talk about some of your favourite moments from are
probably like 6 times that we've met.
You know, I like that time you picked me up at the airport.
He's ever done that for me before.
Carriage you from Belfast City Airport into the city centre in
my arms. Yeah, usually I just get that we
shape butts, but. Not this time my friend.
I think I had you in the Passat and I told I told you to sit in
the back in the back corner just so I could show for you and in
the Belfast. But yeah, honestly I've never
had this is this is the best birthday present just having you
on here man, just realising like the fucking good times that we
had. I know that year Aaron and Dave
weren't at the Galway Comedy Festival, but it was great that
you were there and smashed all the gigs you did that remember I
did really badly the last night and then drove home.
But apart from that, it was a good that when the hen do were
in. It was the hen do and the
biggest comedy of year and in the in the UK, in Ireland.
Is there any rational? Really, is there any way I can
get that review? Chris.
Yeah, yeah. And John?
No, no, I think it's done. Let's read it.
I'd like.
Yeah, we can read that life, couldn't we?
Done. I'll look it up.
Is it? Yeah, Mr. Brown, I don't.
Think to take choral spell. E-mail.
OK, I'll find that. Spell with Yeah, Chris, Chris,
if you can. Just think you should know, you
should find this. So who else have we got coming
on here? The thing about this is we're,
we're on a, we're on a schedule, but we don't were this, these
were the ones we had to squeeze in.
So everyone else would just. Kind of.
They come and go. They're bohemian, just in and
out. You know, and beautiful man.
That's what it is so. Yeah, well, the thing about
reviews is, you know. I.
Actually, I actually had spent I had such a great day with Chris
that day that I forgot I forgot that I was a stand up and also
he was going on after me. So what I did was decided I
wouldn't have a great set and then just let my man just have a
just have a good run at it basically.
And you ended up having a good show.
So just remember also this review, the way he writes it, he
always means the opposite of what he wrote.
It was opposite day. And yeah, yeah.
That day. Yeah.
So by the way, it takes Dave a long time to type because.
He is. No, I've I've actually got.
Her fingers so we. Oh, do you have pleasers Go.
Ahead, Shane Todd's quiet style was a little adrift of the
situation when he remonstrated with the hen party.
When he remonstrated with the hen party, he felt a little bit
like a supply teacher ticking them off, having a despite an
attempt to be made and what she was material as drawn from his
life in Northern Ireland is kind of like him himself, lightweight
and even forgettable. That's pretty sly and based on
such major events as trying to order a cup of tea, which is
good for the sake of this podcast.
And let's have a look at this Chris Glasgow's Chris MacArthur.
No man, wrap it up. And a modest conversational
style. But he was the stat deceptive,
more innate. He controlled the room, he was
relaxed and he smashed the dead punch lines.
Wow. I mean, OK, I got to jump in,
right? Now.
On a couple of these points, the supply teacher line, I had done
material about being a supply teacher and secondly, I did try
and be made with the hen do because I went can you guys stop
talking, we can be mates. They said no, it was a disaster
but I was they caught. They were actually calling me
the martyr after that one because I just laid my life down
for my friend and the best comedian in this room, Chris
MacArthur boys. But Chris, I had other good gigs
at that festival, which you can you.
Can you can. You can jump in here anytime on
a. Pacquiao.
What about the other gig? The The Pub Crow.
Wasn't the bed, but there was other there's other gigs at the
festival. Where not me.
Searching. Keep searching.
That one in the Pope and the Pope was no, you went there.
That was me. What?
Did you say like I've heard the the the festival one because of
the review, but what was? The pub crawl.
He hasn't told us that one. Was it?
No, he didn't he. Didn't tell you about that.
It's kind of like you go pub to pub with a big group of audience
members, but they're really just there to get drunk.
They're not really interested in comedy, but they kind of bring
out kind of struggling comedian and they put him in front of.
Yes, yes they do these. Drunk people.
And it's kind of like bear beating.
Yeah, like make a wish I guess. Make a wish type bear beating
yeah. I wish you.
I wish you guys. Would shut the fuck up but at
the same time there was a review from that and if if you guys
don't mind I've I've actually got it up as you can see on
screen there no. Here, but don't need to rain
reviews anymore. Don't worry about move on.
Chris, tell me about this. Sex, it said.
Sexy Nordic looking bastard. She and Todd took to the stage,
absolutely killed a great guy. Said oh, it's this Chris
MacArthur board backstabbing bastard.
Yeah, no, but it was good festival.
Apart from that, it was a good festival and let me down here.
This scarf shopping was brilliant.
Scarf shopping was the best performance I had at that
festival. Because I did get a scarf
philtre out of us. He bought.
He bought one for me. I bought one for him.
Oh. No.
Shane insisted on doing take 5 minutes in a Primark at the toe
for the women made the toe. It's not called what you call.
It's not pretty much called pennies does something.
Yeah, yeah. But you acted like we were all
going to be the shit out of you if you got that wrong.
We'd be prepared. We'd fully be prepared.
On that side. There's three guys that aren't
going to beat you up. It's.
Yeah, US three puts. On his paintings.
Corner, Chris is you don't call for anymore.
Chris is producer Dan in the corner, sort of unnerving you a
bit. Well, it's kind of scary, like
someone sitting in the darkness like.
Yeah. It's kind of like I've been
interrogated by three Irishman. It's just like someone with a
light behind them so you can see their face.
It's kind of like come in and touch it.
Well, I mean, often that's what guests that come on this podcast
say the experience of it is like, again, do you, Chris, do
you listen to this podcast? Yeah, he does.
He fucking does. Yeah.
Chris, tell me your favourite episode should.
Don't worry, it's going to be the Christmas special.
A Christmas special? Yeah.
We know the gifts. That's right, the gifts.
I like that one too. I like that one too.
It's good. The Halloween.
Episode. Yeah, it was good for that was
good on the podcast launch in February.
Oh, the Valentine's episode was, oh, classic.
That was the one for me where I was just like, this is my new
favourite podcast. Actually, the Jimmy Dolan
episode was pretty good, if you guys, Yeah.
I. Was going to see.
I was good that one. I was good that one.
Yeah, it was good. I was going to see, I watched
that Belfast thing that he's in, what's it called the?
Fall. Yeah.
Genuinely thought you were going to say Belfast Blues Me and
Orange web series and we both were like somebody from outside
of our friendship circle watched it and we got excited but that's
fine. That's all good.
Yeah, No. Cheers, Chris.
No, the claim thing. The Fall.
Yeah, and I was going to phone you up and go hear that.
That hurt them. The fact that the fictional
series The Fall. Happened.
Was it based on actually a story?
I was. Yes, we've got the guy it was
based on right there. He's got big silver headphones.
No, but Chris, what we should do is we should you should come
over to Belfast and when it's safe to do so, we'll do like a
tour of Belfast, the fall inspired and I'll just all
locations. And then if it's cold enough and
your neck is a certain temperature, we'll get you a
scarf. We'll get you a scarf.
Yes, I think that. 'D be beautiful, man.
That's so good to see your face. But even even if it's not safe,
still come. Yeah, no.
Well. It could be a renegade.
Just come over and do what you got to do.
Yeah, fuck the government, man. Yeah.
And I mean, let's just say again, I don't know what the
messages are in this podcast. Am I allowed to?
Is this your view? Is this the view of the podcast?
No, it's not the View. No, because we're sponsored by
Stormont and the. DUP but right OK at.
The same time, Chris, what about that time where I said we
should, we should write a sitcom about the ferry, the stand line
on one guy who's always going over.
This is so me, right? It's based on one guy who's
always travelling over to Belfast for work, who was Chris,
and then another guy who's travelling over to Scotland for
work. Me.
And they would chat every day on the way there, on the way back.
And then my man Chris pointed out then they wouldn't be on the
same ferry. And I went, yeah, it's fair.
So, so nothing. But then he's probably thought
that's going to be the plot twist, you know?
I mean, that could be the twist at the end of it.
It could be like an M Night Shyman or they're not even
mates. It's like shutters island, they
both only exist in each others minds.
Exactly. I then tried to adapt and I was
like no but what if the fairies pass each other and they're
able? They just shout like alright
mate, yes mate, back and forth but the pitch got turned.
BBC were, in their own words, were not interested.
I felt, I felt so bad breaking the news to you that it didn't
make any fucking sense because he was, he was so excited.
Yeah, yeah, I know. I just have to say, Shane, have
you felt so far on this episode that maybe you've been like
hounded a bit and maybe bullied and.
I don't think 1 positive things been said about me.
Do you feel as though you need you need like some sort of
fatherly support? Oh Christ.
Do you feel like you maybe need your dad on the podcast?
Let's. Go.
There he is. Do you have your audio on?
I don't know if if Jerry can hear us.
Jerry. I hear my pictures to fuse.
Them there we. Go oh wait, connected audio.
Hello, Jerry. Hello, Jerry.
Welcome. Hello, happy birthday son
birthday. My broadcasting father, great to
see. I mean, Jerry, so far no one
said a nice word about me. So really it is great to see you
because I know you only have high praise for me.
I think you've said all the people you've worked with in
your lengthy career, in your distinguished career, I've been
the highlight. I think you said that before if
I'm not misquoting, or maybe it was me that said it.
No, I don't think it was me actually said those particular
words. One of the I think you.
Said one of the. Best.
But Jerry, the guys were just talking about some of some of
their favourite memories of me and maybe some of some of their
favourite qualities. So if you want to jump in,
that'll be great. Jerry, if you want to jump in.
So Jerry, any of them, I know there's quite a lot.
You'll probably be processing them and going through the best
ones like soft Border Patrol. That was great.
I mean, you did that. Oh, that was good.
Yes. I thought I started that.
Actually, I thought I took the shine off your performance.
Yeah, you do. Some people have said that.
Yeah, everybody's look all everybody agrees with me.
No, I think it was like belt. I think we're shining equally
me, you and the camera. I think it was just it was just
television gold and Jerry, you know, you, you, you have been
like, yes, you're my broadcasting father and stuff,
but do you want to say something nice about your son?
Like let's not be afraid to be personal.
Like what are some personality traits You you like?
I think you've, you said like my charisma, very charming and
modest. Yeah, it was one as well.
Shane, have you got the right Jerry Kelly?
Well. We.
Listen, listen, I can only hope the other Jerry Kelly is going
to bounce in here at some point as well.
And Chris won't get who that is. But Chris, the other Jerry,
Kerry Kelly is a little bit bolder.
Let me just say that. Jerry, can you maybe tell
everybody about your first impressions and me whenever,
whenever we met, met whenever I came on your show and really
Ulster? Is this for live broadcast?
Seriously. Dave, Dave, can you sort of
describe to Jerry the platform in which this this is kind of
happening? Yeah, what what it is, is this
is this is Shane's podcast that we've kind of just hijacked as
it's his birthday. So I mean, normally it's it's AI
want to say it's a propaganda tool that he uses to to put his
thoughts out there. But basically now this is we're
putting an end to fake news, and we're just letting his listeners
hear a wee bit about the real Shane so you can say whatever
you like and just, you know, be open and honest.
Jerry, Just do your thing. So are we the total number of
his listeners? The six of us.
A little disrespectful, Jerry, I think the three of us.
Are going to be on it, so we're not even proper listeners.
I first met Shane what, 3-4 years ago?
Yeah. You're short trousers, you come
into the BBC. Nothing else.
That's about right. The BBC looking to get on the
Kelly's show. You thought I want to get off
and you come in saying, oh, Jerry, it's been my ambition to
see you and I always wanted to play the mugs game this.
Was a OK yes, I said that. I said that yes, I want short
trousers. You were.
Well, you were, in my eyes,
Really, you're only a child and you committed.
You wanted to play. You wanted to play the mugs
game, and that's you ingratiated yourself upon me at that
particular time. And I, and my good nature as I
am, let you play the mugs game and let you win, although that's
you. Didn't let me win.
I don't have any more memories of you to tell you the truth.
Oh, Jay, that's weird because I've been on your show about
five times since and we did ATV show together, but.
Hold a minute. Did you say wasn't I good on the
TV show? Yeah.
I think we were both equally good, Jerry.
I think we were both. Jerry was better.
Who was her?
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Jerry, Jerry, see these, these
guys here, they're like, unlike you and I have a little bit of
class as broadcasters, as performers.
They're part of this new school of like, you know, comedian type
guys where they're, it's, it's more rude than anything, Jerry.
It's a little bit, it's a little bit tacky the way they get on.
They like to criticise their friends and say nasty things.
And I think you and I have a mutual respect and we only have
good things to say about each other.
Are any of these other ones funny?
No. They, they do stand up.
Yeah, they do stand up. And Jerry, just while I have you
here, I've maybe said to you 10 or 11 times, in fact, anytime
I've been on your show or seen. Yeah, I go, Jerry must get
around to golf sometime. And you always do this thing
where you go, uh huh. And then we haven't played golf.
So is there. Have you heard about, have you
heard something about me that means you wouldn't bring me to
the golf course? I don't know what the problem
is, Jerry. Oh, you live locally to me,
don't you? Really.
Yes, I can be. I could be at your house in.
Your garden? Yeah.
Well, unfortunately it's only members only at the moment
because of the this. Was way before was Jerry.
A lot of people actually do refer to she and as a member, so
maybe that would would equate them getting access to.
Yeah, he's a bit of a tool right now, yeah.
I'll be honest, that's kind of just direct, you know what I
mean? Like.
It's supposed to be more subtle than that, is it?
Yeah, well, we're saying positive things with jumping in
and saying about maybe, you know, like bright young comedic
talent OR whatever. Because, Jerry, you've
interviewed absolutely everybody, like anyone who's
anyone. And then surely when you
interviewed me, you just saw a little something.
You went that's that's the guy. That's the guy.
So what is that star quality do you think that people like
myself have? And like, you know, you've
interviewed like Desmond Tutu. Did you interview Nelson
Mandela, Jerry? No, I never got to Mandela.
I got to to. We were waiting on him, but we
didn't get him from over there. Desmond Tutu, George Best, I
mean, all these, all these prominent figures, What is it
you saw on me, Jerry? Where you went?
That's a *, Jerry. It's just I don't know if
there's a communication issue here, but I don't.
Know nothing to tell you the truth, Shane, right?
To be perfectly honest, I, I didn't see much in you, the
producer, the producer of your show at the time forced me to
take you on, right? I and I took you on and I can't
remember laughing at anything you said.
I can remember thinking this is a long 8 minutes on the radio
here. Yeah.
Other than that, Shane, I I wish you well though.
Look, I don't get me wrong. It's not like I would like to
see you succeed. Yeah, but it's, it's going to
take a while, as you well know. Well, no, I'm sort of open.
It would be. It would be sooner rather than
rather than later, but. Shane, Shane, do you wanna?
Do you wanna show Jerry you've been working on on your
technology side of things? Do you wanna show my major green
screen work for the sake of this podcast?
So Jerry happens. I tried to have like a
futuristic green screen behind me for this podcast.
And again, This is why I need you to mentor me more because
this wouldn't happen like the Kelly show.
I imagine there was no continuity errors.
I imagine it was just smooth sailing on the technical side of
things. But I tried to have a virtual
background. So, you know, I could make
myself be in the San Francisco Bridge or anything like that.
And then it didn't like Go as well as I had hoped.
It. Would.
But that's you guys here, Terry. Like as you can see Jerry, I
have a working green screen behind me and I tried, I tried
to put like a fun image. But.
Don't don't bend over anymore. Oh, very good.
You've never been on the golf course of Jerry.
I'm doing it right now. We're.
Live you like that, Jerry? Jerry, he's not a member.
No, Jerry.
I'm coming down, He's coming down.
He's not. He's not on the list, Jerry.
I mean, he is on other lists, but he is not on that one.
How do you do that? That's really good look.
You're the Yep that they do. You're killing a Jack.
Do. You know what's worse?
He's he's on the actually, actually stop Megan.
I can't get off that. Hold on.
There you go. Jerry, do you know what?
I would really like to get a little bit more serious for a
second. There's a guitar behind you.
I didn't know you actually play guitar.
Is there anything you would like to play me for my bird?
No, I was restringing. There's only 5 strings on it at
the moment. That's fine.
I'm I'm OK with that, Jerry. So whatever you want to play me,
I'm good with. It's totally up to up to you.
You can't. You can't play guitar in five
strings. Jimi Hendrix.
Jimi Hendrix once said that whenever he would play and his
string would break, it would just improvise with other
strings. So you could probably come up
with something, Jerry. Jimi Hendrix said.
That Jerry Hendrix. And you're talking to me
straight afterwards, that's going.
For it anyway, Jerry, just anything you want to sing about,
like maybe like. Like all well.
You're the best thing or. Listen to that I was re
stringing up today. Look at that look.
Jerry, that's beautiful. No one else has serenaded me for
my birthday this year. So honestly, whatever you want
to play me like. Well, I'll tell you, I do have a
party piece. I do have a party piece.
And I can if you give me the name, any name at all.
Yeah. Fella or a girl?
I will make a song up about it in at least 5 seconds.
Well, just me, probably Shane Todd.
Shane. You want to use the word Shane.
Yeah. Give me 5 I'll.
Give you 5, I'll give you 6. There you go.
OK. OK.
Very excited for this. This is what I wanted my whole
birthday. At least someone's making a
little bit of an effort. Jerry Kelly with an original
song about the birthday boy. Take it away, Jerry.
Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday. Join me in Join in.
Happy happy birthday. Happy.
Birthday. What is your?
Oh sorry, she can stop. We had shamed.
There. You go.
Yeah, I think, well, thanks a lot Jerry, but I think
disrespectful across the board from from everybody in here.
You know it's done with love. Shame.
Yeah, I know, I know, I know, I know that.
I mean, it's not received with love, you know, received a
little bit of hate, I'll be honest.
But but yeah, no, honestly, if there was, if there was five
guys I could spend my birthday with, it would not be you love.
Like definitely, definitely, definitely not.
Who would it be? They would be well my favourite
actually my favourite Scottish comedian Ray Bradshaw.
Ray Bradshaw, my 2 favourite local comedians, Colin Gettis
and and Mickey Bartlett on a serious one like I think the the
premier broadcaster in these parts Hugo you know.
So if if we can't get them, you guys will do as as replacements.
It's fair. But.
Yeah. I mean, I think you get the
also, Jerry, a lot of people very surprised that I am this
age. You know, you probably think I'm
still a young, young whippersnapper going about the
place, but 30? 23232, yeah.
Yeah. What were you doing for the 1st
31 years of your life? Because it's only recently.
He's the young offenders. Sherry's in the young offenders.
No, no, I was in a young offender centre.
But. But yeah, I mean, this is there
is an element that nastiness here which I didn't want.
What, Dave, were you about to? Dave's gone.
Dave got fed up. Sorry I.
Was realising I was sort of fading in the darkness like that
and it looks. Creepy.
It's very creepy. To just be staring at a lot of
guys through a computer screen in darkness.
So I thought it would had a wee bit of lighting and you can you
can see me for the beauty that I am Jerry.
So I thought I would. Absolutely.
You were the 1 I always wanted to meet actually, because I do
recognise the power behind the throne.
Jerry, Jerry, maybe you do. Please do not refer to him as
the power behind the throne. He will run with that for miles,
please. This is, this is what it is.
Because you know he's made you. Whatever you are, he's made.
You. Very true.
My next poster, The Power behind the Throne, and I think I'm
actually a T-shirt made. Let's have that on.
He's not that's behind the he's not the part behind the throne.
He's the piss behind the wall. That's what he.
Is. I'm Cummings and you're Boris.
That's what we are together. You can't.
What are you going to do for your birthday?
Like what have you done or what are you going to do week of it
or what? Yeah, I mean, I think we'll turn
it into like a week long thing. But I know Jerry, I'm just
keeping it low key, just keeping it low key with very, very close
friends. So Rory McIlroy, Jimmy Dornan,
couple of Jimmy Nez, but a couple of like just very close
pals are, are coming round for a bit of a social distance
gathering in the in the garden, which should be should be a bit
of fun. But but no, I mean, be honest,
Jerry. I expect a presence.
Dave is someone who we all have that, that friend Jerry who goes
all your presents on its way, you know, And he's done that
like every year for the past 5-6 years, which is a bit rude.
But no, I'm just, unfortunately, I'm just hanging out with you
guys. Yeah, well, Dave did say no to
the presence. Yeah.
Jerry, you're not supposed to tell him that.
That was only just private. Oh.
Sorry, I thought, I thought this was a request from Shane himself
that he didn't want president, he didn't want to fuss me and.
Jerry, you have been involved in TV for how many?
You said we talked about in self boredom.
So 40 more than 40 years. Yeah, since 1979.
How many years is that? Quite a lot and.
You were born. No, I was born in.
Yep, Yep, it is No 79. Yep, I've been feeling the head.
But Jerry, me, me, Chris, Dave and Iron like 4 young
performers. Yeah, if, if, if, if you were,
if you were a commissioner and, and you were going to give us a
show and you were like, because we are the new you.
We're the new wave of, of comedy talent.
What would you, what sort of show could you see us being in?
Like using your experience, what would you like to see the four
of us getting up to well. It wouldn't be a comedy show
question. I have to.
I have to think about that. Have a look at the four of you.
Let me see the four of you. Just, you know, well, you know,
you would have Mick Jagger up front, but you could, you could,
you could make something I'm I'm sure.
You see, sadly, you know, to put a bit of sincerity end of this.
No, no. As you were.
The same. Hi, Jack.
Good to see. You.
Hello. You see, unfortunately for you
guys, and I do feel a little bit sorry for you guys, there's no
vehicle on television or radio for you guys nowadays, which I
think is an absolute disgrace in Northern Ireland.
Do you? Think that's always been the way
of it or do you think? Immoral.
It wasn't, if you think, if you The Kelly Show.
The Kelly Show went on for 18 years.
John Daly did a show. Patty Keatley did a show on the
BBC. There's nothing like that now,
and there's no there's no stage for you guys anymore, except the
comedy circuit. I just.
Risk. You go to the Ulster Hall or
whatever at your own expense, virtually.
Or not. I just want to say, oh, Jerry
Chen has been in quite a lot of television shows but just hasn't
seemed to connect to the audience for some reason.
It's just something missing 1. Well, I dislike.
There's a dislike. I saw him up close on Border
Patrol and I can understand why. I think he had to be hand fed
every word he heard. He knew a word, never learned
the script. Yeah, that's that's a shame.
We had to do it about 10 times to get it right because of shame
and there was me walked in, had it like that.
Jerry, did we have to do it 10 times for that or because you
were aggressively smashing cups? Even though that was part of the
scene, Jerry massively lost a run of himself and nearly
blinded me at one point. And maybe professional I am.
So don't worry about it, Jerry, it's all right as blood oozed
from the corner of my eye. Anyway, you guys should you guys
should have a little petition up to get something back on
television. We'll give you a vehicle to see
your talents. I would love that.
The other three, should you just you just continue with what
you're doing? Come and play golf with me,
shit. I don't think I'm ready to just,
you know, take it easy and play golf, Jerry.
I'm in my I'm in my peak. I'm in my prime.
I'm ready to get out there and keep making quality programming
like I have been doing up until now.
OK, good for you. Jerry.
Tell me this, Chair, do you know the way you're saying?
Like they don't have those programmes anymore, Why do they
stop doing them? A very good question.
I don't know why. Is it like a budget thing?
It's not because like chat shows and so on aren't the most
expensive form of light entertainment.
I still think, you know, it's tough on.
It's not just comedians, young singers, groups, all the rest.
There's no vehicle left for them on local television.
And as much as I love radio, and as much as radio was excellent,
one performance on television will do outweigh 10 performances
on radio, you know? Would your advice to ask Jerry B
to just continue making our own stuff like we do, you know, for
our own channels and, and that kind of thing?
Yeah, I know there's a whole new world out there of of all the
social media, but it doesn't bring you to the masses the way
television can still can. My advice would be emigrate.
And, and where, where would you recommend some of us, where
would you say Shane should go, where he immigrates?
Isle of Man, for shame. Why, You'd be a bit homesick,
wouldn't you? You could nip across quite
quickly, you know. You're married now, aren't you?
Yeah, yeah. You'd have to come back and see
the wife every now and then, so like.
It's a husband. It's a husband.
I think she, I think she'd be happy enough if I lived in the
Isle. Of man, I think.
I think that would suit her. I think it would absolutely suit
her him. Suit him.
Yep, are. You sure it's a him?
Yeah. Yeah.
It's me did. I did I also hear that there is
there Is there a baby on the way?
Yep. Yep.
Yep, there is. Jerry, are you going to?
Be a little Todd. Very, very soon.
I'm, I'm trying to, I'm trying to think, I'm taking your advice
and I'm trying to think in TV ways.
And I'm going to say it's going to be released very, very soon,
coming to a prom near you very, very soon.
Well, maybe it would not be something you could.
You could pitch like a reality show, just you may be taking on
the role of the midwife and delivering your own child.
I think that'll be something people may pay to see Chris.
Do you want to jump in the toddler?
Toddler. That's good.
Toddler, I can see you go far, Chris.
Yeah. Don't need to start.
You don't need to start begging up Chris.
You don't know Chris. Jerry, come on.
Chris. Thanks, Jerry.
Go back. The wolf's better up here,
whatever that is. He does game and Jerry's in the
like this computer game thing. Chris is 12.
Jerry is what you need. Another Chris.
I'm a 27 year old man. Really.
I.
Jerry Chris is Dave's son, Chris.
Chris is what? Chris is Daves eldest son.
Really. Dad said they had a showbiz
opportunity for me. Come in, don't show me up in
front the day we'll put you at opposite ends of the stream and
just you behave. The powers above you.
The power behind the throne.
No, Jerry, don't call him that, but Jerry, we you talked about
letting me play the mugs game back in the day and whenever I
and you got to hand it to the kid, whenever I won the mugs,
whenever I won the mug fair and square, which you know what
happened. I gave you a mug.
You presented me with a mug and that is honestly like I'm not,
I'm not into like possessions, which I mean I am, I don't know.
I said that I don't have much like I don't.
If I was, say, I had to flee the country, Jerry, I wouldn't bring
much stuff with me. I mean, probably my family, to
be fair. But what I'm saying is I'm not
sentimental. But my Kelly Show mug is a very
treasured possession and I've never drank out of it because I
don't want to ruin it. So it sets up on a little thing.
He's actually paid to have it boxed in a frame and it sits on
his mantelpiece, and he actually has, like, a magnifying glass to
make it even bigger. So yeah, I don't want to say
this on his birthday podcast, effectively as your stalker,
Jerry. And yeah, it's awkward.
Well. I had my suspicions, to be fair.
Yeah, I did have my suspicions. And what was it that made you
think this guy's a little bit weird in the 1st?
Place Probably the short trousers.
He keeps talking about that I was wearing.
Jerry, I don't own short trousers.
I went to Hollywood about 32 years ago.
And nine months, 32 years and nine months in the.
In that time, how do we drink in a bar there?
So maybe that's for this. And then deal.
With you and I come from have together.
Yeah, it would explain a lot. It would explain.
A lot. It would explain my feelings
towards you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hatred. I wonder, I wonder, I wonder.
Oh, this was a this was a nice birthday surprise, Joe, you were
the only nice birthday surprise here.
Honestly, the rest of the guys take or leave them, but it's
been it's. Been and Jerry, if you just
invoiced me for that cost, we agreed for you to come on and do
this. It'll be it'll be first post.
Yeah. You think you have to photograph
a Jackie Fuller? Now put me back up again.
Sure thing, boss. I see there, I'm on the golf
course. That's the that's the 11th of
the golf course. I'll never say it, probably, but
I keep asking. Yeah, as a birthday present to
you, you're invited to come to our glass.
Yes, Jerry. Anytime, anytime.
Next. Year the first mongers couple
of. Great, Jerry.
I will genuinely look forward to that.
That'll be my birthday present to.
You. It'll ruin that if you invite
anybody else in this room. But please let it just be me and
you, father and son. Well, I'll tell Rory not to
bother them. Well, no, no, tell us.
Still tell him to come. No, definitely.
Yeah, just like Jimmy. Can I just say about Rory?
I did send. You a message I.
Tell you what, I had a son, had some goatee.
Jerry. Jerry.
Where did you get it? Can I just say?
Something. Like Dave, you look a weeds.
I say you're talking about going to Hollywood.
Yes, pardon. Is that is that new?
Jerry. That's me right about.
I think it was about 32 there. Jerry, Jerry, you look like a
lion there. Yeah, I see.
I see people used to think that I look like Billy Connolly.
So we we'd touch of it. It's actually the corner like
you've got. Hair and a beer.
I. Think I was rather attractive as
a young man? You don't think so?
Definitely more attractive for you very much, but maybe not
Billy Connolly. Was anybody asking you?
Sorry, Dan. He's no longer the power behind
the throne, no. Dan, can you take Jerry out of
this, call you from the power? Dan of Stephon Dan the beaten
standards is nearly over. We finished here because these
standards is just foundation that at least something's worth
watching on television. Any chance of getting a spot
back on the border? Soft Border Patrol?
Shame. Right, Jerry, I'm asking them
the same question. And they are.
There they are. It's the boys.
There we are there. The dynamic duo themselves.
Jerry, do you know how you know that that was a good scene?
Because the crew were cracking up during it and they get so
they get so like numb to just sitting through 12 hour days of
all this kind of thing. But the crew really enjoyed that
one. That's what you told me, isn't?
That photo, it looks like you are like the trusty owner of
like some kind of like table warehouse and chains just your
employee of the month and you're like bringing them under your
wing to be you. My my friend would sell live
edge tables. Try it again.
I don't listen. See this Just pure whiskey.
I've been on it all night and I'm trying to hold myself
together, but I was just so nervous with Jerry coming on
that I had the self medicate. Are you boys all taking the
Mickey out of me? Am I just here?
It's not broadcast. I get the feeling that, you
know, you're sort of laughing and sniggering up your sleeves
at this side, fella. Can you see us, Jerry?
We're not. We're not.
Oh, I hold on, Jerry, are you in gallery mode?
Yeah, I can see a lot of you. Oh, you can see a lot of us.
Yes, yes, that's good. I'm sitting up there.
He looks like something out of the darkness.
The Band. Look.
At Justin. Fuck it.
Jerry, how are you? Dan's come a long way, too.
Hasn't. He, he is.
He is. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Monkey hands. Monkey.
I don't even know if I don't even know if monkeys have long
hands or fingers, but it felt that it felt, it felt kind of.
Apartment what was that we facial expression for their
Shane did you realise about your fingers in the middle of that or
what kind of went on. So disrespectful.
Jerry.
Is this a radio programme? Yeah.
It's podcast. Podcast.
Podcast with the finest podcast in the land, Jerry my tea with
me podcast, which I will separately ask you to be a guest
on. So just respect the broadcaster,
respect the broadcaster. We can chat because honestly.
Yeah, I know, Jerry. You're right.
But but Jerry, Jerry, I just did you.
Where did you get my number? He's just texted me there to say
that it's time for him to go because he hates us.
Is that what do you mean not to come to me, Jerry?
Or is that? Said that the wrong number I.
Always said you, I said to Dan, actually.
Well, he must have gone to Dave and Dan, but as the as the host
of what will be the most successful episode of this
podcast, I just want to say thank you very much for coming
on and giving us your time and sharing some some great gossip
on Shane, which I didn't know about them.
So we can now take that to Bullium for the rest of the
episode. So.
And they will. Yes.
So thank you very much, Jerry and.
It's been it's been your pleasure.
And before I go, Jen, Shane, I do think you've got something.
Yes. Goodnight.
God bless. God Bless America.
Goodnight everybody. Jerry, appreciate it.
Thank you. Very much, Jerry.
Good to see you, Jerry. Happy birthday, Shane.
Thank you very much, Jerry. I think I'll hike.
I think whoever took Jerry out of the room, like sentence, is
never going to work in the industry.
Again. Yeah.
That might be me, yeah. I think I'll hang up.
OK, OK. Couple couple of things like
that #1 Jerry is one of my genuinely like one of my
broadcasting heroes. Never missed a Kelly show when I
was younger. Love, Jerry.
Hold on, what was your favourite episode?
With Macro episode where he's chipping them in their washing
machine. I genuinely used to watch the
two shows I watched at the weekend with the Kelly Show and
get my headpiece right whenever I was a kid.
But Jerry, I think the first time I met Jerry and I was like,
Jerry, I'm such a big fan. I mean love to.
I think Jerry thought I was joking and it took me a long
time to convince him no, I genuinely just think you're
class Jerry. And it's funny that he thought
we were just like being silly and maybe like taking the piss.
But then he'll realise that this is just what silly boys do in
podcasts. It is just silly.
Boys, I mean, I wish, I wish I'd have thought of that before we
had got him on. I could have said to him when I
was trying to pitch what exactly this was.
Hey Jerry, It's just silly boys doing silly things with each
other. I don't know if you would have
been as keen to get on, but I told him it was the ray of
lockdown and we're going to be playing some gala for him.
But he was just like, yeah, all for it, but not just a regular
podcast. But that was to apologise to him
after this because he thinks we're.
That was fun, Chris. Jerry Kelly's like the Terry
Rogan of of Northern Ireland. Basically, I know Terry Rogan
is, you know. Terry Rogan's from down South.
I mean, I don't want to get political, but I just.
It's an island. He's from the island.
Chris, be careful, OK, Because. I don't know when, I don't know
when. I just know rages of Celtic that
set but who? Do you support?
Chris, do you support Aberdeen fan see in Belfast back in the
day that's still got your smack because the question.
You support. You support product vessel.
How funny was Jerry Jesus? He was killing it, man, do.
You know what the funniest thing is?
Like we have a tendency to like get hyper and get giddy and like
you're when you're at a gig, you're like change it up and you
try and do different things. Whereas Jerry, Jerry just sits
back and conserve, conserves his put downs and just plays them
perfect. Just a not like smooth tone.
He's he's he's a Don like, yeah, very.
Fun and how have you felt they're riding on this podcast
just how have you felt it's been coming in and experienced in
this ride with us I. Mean I wonder why it's taking so
long to be asked to be involved but quest?
I'll get Quest. I'll get you on.
I'll get you on, man. I'm on it.
Just now you can't say I'll get you on.
For a one-on-one. Promised me that you'll get me
on your podcast when I'm already on your podcast.
It doesn't make any sense. It's so Todd.
Man, we'll get, we'll get you on.
You're going to be on. You'll be involved in a
Zoomcast. Should we keep this gravy tree
and rolling? Yeah.
We have the final guest of the night.
Let's just say she and are you a big fan of, I don't know, music?
Yeah. Do you like, let's just say a
certain guy like Justin Bieber? Yeah, is it Bieber?
Hey, Dan, bring him in. I was like, baby.
This guy like him there? You go.
Yeah. Right.
We've had any guests we've had on so far has been.
Rude. Disrespectful and just and just
plain right cheeky to me, to me on my birthday.
If there, if there is what like because I've had, I've had Aaron
on my podcast. Dave and Dave and Chris will do
it at some point, even though they are on it now, but they're
not been like full guests. I'm.
Hosted by the way, just. I know that you will just give
me the respect. I know like you'll, you'll tell
me a couple nice things you like about maybe some of your
favourite things. I don't, I don't want to put
words. You know what?
But like, yeah, let's man, let's just what are you?
What are your favourite things about me?
Favourite things like I remember when I was about 9 and you were
Mike McGoldrick. That was a fun sign for
everybody and say, you know, that's I think that's, you know,
when you when you said you're going to flood Hollywood, I was
initially excited and then I realised it was for for the, for
the good of Hollywood. But I'm.
Criticising my hometown as well. I did.
I did a nice thing about 30 seconds ago.
I think I might have written you a birthday song.
Whoa. Can you, can you kick him out of
this call, Dave? If people want to be nice, they
can be nice. You won't understand this
because Colin basically like Dave is like he's in the comedy
world. You know, I cross platforms, you
know, you'll you'll know me. Like if you've seen any like the
MC BS or stuff I do whatever, which is just a joke because
because like I can't rap obviously, even though some of
it's good. But but like, yes, musician, the
musician if there if you want me to jump in on this as well, like
let me know where you want to. There's a sort of rap you can
throw away about halfway through I think that would be amazing.
In fact, you know what? I'm just going to sit back for
this one. Can I just?
Say this Sunday World are very keen for you to be the next
rapper rapper in the in the in Northern Ireland, so it's good.
On this just as soon as you came in there JC Shane just jumped on
you to try and get you to say something nice because everybody
has basically been being truthful.
This has been like the Ruth Porter and here was just all
getting things off her chest. It's been lovely.
It's been it's been really good and Shane didn't even have the
manners to introduce you. So I mean, would you like to
take away a moment and explain obviously singer-songwriter,
beautiful guy and what, how much did did she pay you to be his
friend and, and what, you know, I did just meet.
We met through just like incessant Instagram DMA.
I think I would come. Up did he start that was it
would it have been something he. Said no.
To be fair, when I was about 15 I started.
Remember being honest, he. Don't get replied to a 15 year
old boy like no, you know. He does that he.
Does. That first of all.
First of all, it's disrespectful to come on.
So you remember the Mike Mcgold of videos when you were nine?
Because I'm 32, I'm 32 and I'm starting to feel 52 just like
that. And let's also nip in the bud.
I don't know whether it's nip in the bud or nip in the bud, but
let's do both to the to the suggestion.
And that's weird because yeah, you said you're 15.
I'm talking about nipping your bed.
But that's kind of, let's kind of put that to bed.
I mean, shit, let's not. But no, let's not put any 15
year old the bed. Let's just, let's just kill the
rumour. Here she.
That I was messaging A50, I mean, I think.
He was taking a hole. I mean, what I would say she and
I as your friend, it's maybe 16 maybe.
Yeah, stop. Just.
Stop. Sometimes I get contacted by
kind of younger fans and I just don't reply to them.
No, I didn't. I basically I sent them a
message being like enjoyed the new single and I'm not don't
describe me as a younger fan because is I think you had a you
had you had you had one of your first singles out.
I think I was doing a radio with the radio show at the time,
getting a little bit Foster, and I was like, what?
Was the show you were doing. It was time.
I didn't know you were like, I didn't know you discovered
musicians. I just thought I this isn't
something I'm finding out about you.
It's great. So this what was this?
We did bomb into each other at the Snow Patrol gig that you and
I, Dave, were we did at Water Park.
And I was beyond blocked. Beyond, yeah.
But no, exactly, you had a full conversation with my dad and he
still talks about it. And I don't think you better
have my dad and. Did you have to have?
Do you have to have your dad there so you could speak with
Jane just. To make sure you.
Were saying it was a strap around situation.
Yeah, good. Nice, So.
And do you remember the contents of that conversation shade?
I've been advised not to speak about it.
Yeah. So you know.
It always does. I think we were talking about
just the music, the biz in general, Like probably chatting
about like record labels and fuck publishers and the usual
chords and fucking the chords, loop pedals and all and all that
kind of thing. But yeah, if you know, if you
have a song you want to you want to throw out, well.
See, I feel, I feel like it's the wrong tone now because
actually it was quite, I think it was quite a nice song.
I was just jamming. I only have the first line, so
everything else is going to be completely made-up on the spot.
Oh yeah? Well, I'm OK with that.
Like Shane said. Well.
No, no, play the song I mean. I'm going to have to change the
lyrics in my head now, I think, because I think the tone has
changed of what we're talking about.
He was, he was a nice man in my head.
And I'm sort of starting to question everything.
And those ice rooms from a young age, no.
Let's not make that part of the song.
Absolutely. Just you do what you feel, I
think. He goes, I guess.
It's Shane Todd's birthday, but a day to get involved.
It's Shane Todd's birthday. I'm just making all the stuff he
was like then over here to college and named Keith.
But Shane Todd's birthday, what a day for everyone.
I think it's a head. I think it might be a head.
Well. Is it to the studio right now?
I know, I think I'm going to send to the record.
They'll be like nobody worry. I know everything's everything's
messed up but I've sorted it. JC JC Stewart featuring MC
Brazer. I mean, I would like to hear
your your verse on that. You know where where you would
go with that one. Yeah.
Like it's quite contrasting styles from what MCBS are
usually takes on. No, my throat is like, like, you
know what it's like? Like I've been doing the ginger
and the fucking lemon and yeah, like I, you know, I'm a
freestyle rapper, but at the same time, sometimes you need
that ginger and lemon and the throat.
So the minute I don't. Have.
Anything to throw out there? But no, I definitely appreciate
that as a song. And if you do want to get in the
studio and lay it down and get it mastered and release it, I'm
how many? More words about music Do you
know Shane? All right, I said Master.
I also know remaster mono. Are you doing that mono or
stereo? Well, technically that that
would be a mono actually, yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, man, I appreciate the song.
I mean no one's, no one's come in with the.
What have people been saying? Mostly because obviously I was
assuming, you know, I'm coming on for a birthday.
I'll be nice. I'll put in 30 seconds of effort
before before I got on the call. I just really, really, really
try my best. So what?
What's everyone else been doing? Pardoner.
So no, no, you go ahead. And yeah, people just been like
picking apartment personality and trying to just be rude in
general. But maybe some of the acting
that I've done before talking about, talking about like, you
know, my age and said I'm older than I am, which is weird
because. Have you got a stage age?
Let's be honest here, Shane. He does.
No, no, you know, everyone knows I'm the 17 year old up and
coming up and coming act. Yeah, the guys who's been
disrespected, which is weird because you're a young guy and
you and I look roughly like I could definitely like.
You and. Your mates?
No, I couldn't be. That.
What would happen is you look older.
Yeah, no, like we could go out like absolutely like.
As son and dad? Yep.
No. In like in like music circles
and what? Was it, you said to me when I
was younger, stand, that you wanted me to call you Dad?
No. I didn't say I wanted you to
call me Dad. I.
Said he did. No, he did.
No, I didn't. I think.
Yeah, I wanted to check your birth certificate.
But apart from that, this guy that was kind of confiscated.
Us Are you over in London? Are you back?
I'm back in. If I was figuring if I took 1
1/2 steps that way, I would be at the end of my apartment.
So yeah, it's really glamorous idea.
Yeah, I mean, that's kind of my scene, you know, I mean, like
these guys would be very much in their own like neighbourhoods.
Like, you know, I could, I could see myself over in London being
a little bit more metropolitan. Oh yeah.
Yeah, they've just been, they've just been rude, you know, but.
You can do you want to show Speaking of metropolitan and
like London and like moving with the time still to show them how
you've set up your green screen. We've shown everybody on the on
the podcast so far how Shane has set up the tech of a screen
screen. So hopefully.
I would love to see this as. Well, I brought my actual green
screen down from I was going. To say, is that just the colour
of your wallpaper? Like it was a bold choice, I was
thinking. No, it's a genuine it's a
genuine green screen and I tried to put a sweet background on it
and and I tried, I tried, I tried to have like I tried to
have a really fun background as well.
I was like this will give the guys a laugh but it's a really
fun whenever I move my head. You know what I mean?
Like. It's happened.
That'll never not be funny. Yeah, I mean, it's what, what's
strange about it is #1 it's a green screen.
And secondly, I'm now sitting just with a green screen behind
me. I'm not, which is, which is
maybe the most basic thing ever, but I'll I'll I'll I'll figure
it out. But they are, they're selling
for a fortune, they're sold out everywhere.
So you can probably probably get £20 down to about.
Yeah, I mean, anything I can get for probably be good because I
have no use for it, because I think.
I'm going to use it. But.
Yeah, that's, that's enjoy. I very much enjoyed having her.
Yeah, Aaron's. There he is.
Hey, me and my boy JC. I'm around JC.
That's another. Thing she was talking about,
actually. Aaron, I think JC, I'm going to
have to just move on here because she and legally I can't
pay his bills anymore. So I'm going to say on behalf of
my podcast, T with D and thank you for that.
And thank you for the beautiful song.
And also thank you for feeling so willing to open up about the
truth about Shane. I think that's something a lot
of people didn't know, and I really, really appreciate it.
But you know, I said it's been, it's been an emotional evening
for me. But happy birthday, Shane.
Thank you very much. Definitely go and get that track
late there. Was no.
No grooming at all. It was all a little joke.
All a little joke. It was just a joke.
Just a little. Joke.
All a joke, yeah. Because I'm actually 37 so.
Yeah, yeah, you, you have a stage age.
I used to be younger, but yeah. So actually it was.
Me too, I don't. Think I was this was.
Just born in this age. This is the youngest I've ever
been. All right.
Well, thank you very much for coming on.
I appreciate. I'll probably see you at an
industry party in the next couple of months for.
Absolutely. For the new the new Blazing
Squad track. Or whatever see a cytostasia the
limelight just my eyes piercing into your yes.
Like your tour poster followed me around for for a lot of
months doing that, but it did. Yeah.
Cheers for coming on the pod. Appreciate it.
And happy birthday cheer you later.
Thanks very. Much.
Take it easy. No, Somebody wrote me a nice
song. Somebody wrote me a nice song.
That's the way to. Do it.
I mean, the guy is talented, A talented guy, but I kind of feel
like you put him under pressure and he just kind of winged it on
the spot. The lyrics were it's Shane
Todd's birthday. It's Shane Todd's birthday and
he's. Telling.
Me to do this. Chris, did you ask who that was?
Yeah, yeah. I this is like.
Belfast fucking royalty man. Right.
What happened was I saw JC pop up, I realised none of the guys
knew him beforehand. I know he's a little bit younger
as well, so I thought I don't want like, I want him to like
know the situation so I can't like Also I when he saw he had a
guitar on his hand, I was like, he's probably got a song for me.
So I got a little bit getting carried away and I was like, I
almost didn't want you guys to know him.
I didn't want you guys to steal him and be friends like you did
with Jerry. So I think I jumped in.
I was disrespectful. I didn't give him an
introduction. But Jay-Z Stewart,
singer-songwriter, fantastic, did an episode of the podcast
and he's really good. Lovely.
Chris, can I, can I just ask again?
I hate the sound like I'm doing an investigative journalism
here. But see, whenever you and Shane
first met, did he reach out to you on social medias?
Haven't seen your pictures and it was just a coincidence that
you were older than you are And do stand up or what was the
situation there? You know.
He said Galway is a cover story. He said, well, we met in Galway,
but I actually heard from him a couple of years earlier.
Yeah, he said. What was it ASLASL?
Is that like that band that's I beat again?
Age, sex, location. That was what he wanted.
To know I didn't ask your age X location.
We booked for the Galway Comedy Festival together.
You, you, you basically you were sitting with I think a blanket
on your knees when I went backstage and you said to me in
in your, you said. What's under this?
If I can use your accent, you said, you said.
And I was barely a whisperer. But only I heard it.
You said you said I. Think you said?
I don't know anyone. And I said, yeah, you did.
You did, man. Why is he missed out fire?
I don't. Nobody had a blanket over his
knees and they said I don't know anyone and he was sort of like
crying a little bit. And I said.
I said it's OK and I think I put my jacket around you and I said
let's go get you a scarf and it went from there.
I think it went from there. It's been beautiful ever since.
Remember we went to get wings in Edinburgh, which was nice and
there was some problem with mine.
Now to send them back and the guy was pissed off.
Yeah, that was that was an idea. But.
Roscoe was a good guy. I asked him to come to the
podcast and he said Nah, fuck you so.
Yeah. Pretty hurtful.
Can you pass my regards on to him please, Chris?
Roscoe's like my Dave. Yeah, We, we, we would have some
sort of like tag team event if we were like wrestlers, like we
would be a feud and tag team, I think.
And Aaron would definitely be like our manager, yes.
Yes. Who like who pokes people in the
eye and stuff and then and then he and then he becomes like a
red after our tag team breaks up.
He becomes a wrestler who wrestles and matches by himself.
But he gets released by the company after like 6 months and
he still does wrestling students around Europe but like, you
know, conventions. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's exactly what I'm stressed.
Now with the headphones on. Yeah.
I do not have to listen to music.
They're to kill noises that make them angry.
It's called. It's called Rico Sunshine.
I Rico shite more like. That's that's my move.
That's my. That's cool.
Yeah, you like it? Yeah, I like that.
Yeah, it's good. That's how Rico Sunshine.
That's intimidation. That's what it does in the ring.
So have you enjoyed this? Absolutely.
I've really enjoyed it. I've really enjoyed it.
It's been a lot of fun, you know, and I think you kind of
have to, if you give it out, you have to be able to take it.
Isn't that it, guys? And listen, I give it out
plenty. So you guys have come along with
your insults and your jibes and I feel like I've been a good
sport. Take it in a mis drive.
I will never speak to any of you little rats again.
And if you were here, I'd Scrabble your faces.
No, it's been a lot of fun. Dan has been very unnerving the
whole way through. Like I would love it if Dan had
jumped in at several points. I would have enjoyed it because
Dan and I do a bonus podcast for the Patreon and we speak like
equally and Oh no. That's all you had to do.
Now that's all you had to do the whole.
Time this is. But I've never seen what Dan
looks like. This is the first time I've been
catfished. I thought Dan was a 45 year old
black lady. Oh, you definitely didn't.
You thought he was a 16 year old fella, but we'll not talk about
that. Who played music?
Although the podcast isn't a year old yet and you you've been
producing for a couple of months, you like this is where
someone could say something potentially nice.
Like you have to say, like we got into the iTunes Top 40 for a
couple of weeks. It's it's been growing.
Surely with all the talent you've worked with, like you do
the Russell Brand's podcast you produce currently, Sue Perkins
podcast, surely you I have to stand out head and shoulders as
the most professional competent. And there's a, there's a good
silence here because people want to hear the answer to this.
But yeah, do you want to sort of jump in and basically say what
it's been like to work on the podcast?
Well, actually we've been going for almost an hour and a half
now, so I think we just run out of time.
So maybe we just wrap it up. No, I think we're good because I
don't think we have a set time. No, no, no, there definitely is.
Yeah. That's good.
As the. Host of the podcast, I'm happy
to take your lead. You're the producer through the
boss and I'm just basically the the numbers really, I'm the one
that will bring the listeners to the the failing podcast.
But I think obviously we've done an hour and a half.
We just want to kind of say, Shane, I think you've been kind
of fishing for compliments in in an empty bucket.
Really. Do you want to just if you want
to come out and out the end and maybe sort of say thank you to
our our guests on the podcast here today, Aaron and Chris,
please, they can go back to their lives and then start
enjoying themselves again and not feel pressured to say
something nice about you. Well, first of all, to Aaron
Butler, I want to say you're a special guy.
Thanks. And never forget that.
No, you're you're beautiful in many ways.
And I just want you to just keep being yourself.
And you've, you've disrespected me, Chris.
Honestly, take Aaron out like we're knocking them off on by.
Get rid of finite Aaron. Happy birthday mate, it's good
to be here. Thank you though so Chris, you
still are my best friend in comedy, just slightly over Dave,
but there yes, there has been a lot of disrespect and what I
appreciate in a nice way is you being here for the whole pod
because a lot of that was was an eye banter.
You know what I mean? Like there was a lot of
references. I was like all the other Jerry
Kelly. I mean, I'll.
Giggled that it's a Provo guy. Well, it.
Was it may be best if we take Chris out.
I mean, we won't be the only ones taking Chris out that.
Was a very a very nice way to end it.
That was that was nice. No, it, it has been a lot of
fun. Like David, you know that I
enjoy a couple of things. Tea, fresh fruit and I enjoy
having a. Lot of.
Friends and tonight I have not seen any friends but we've had a
nice time and there's something weird isn't there whenever
you'll you sort of like enjoy being slagged off by your mates
it's like Denzel and training day whenever no one will back
him up down. We talked about this in a
Patreon episode when Denzel, like, no one backs him up in the
estate and he's looking around like, you motherfuckers.
All right, all right. You know, it's that kind of
thing. But.
But no, I I, I enjoyed it. It was a lot of fun.
I appreciate the effort you guys put in to this podcast that I
knew nothing about. I didn't even know you were
doing the birthday episode for me.
Yeah, No, you. Did pay us to do that, but
that's that to worry about it. But now that everyone's gone.
Yeah, now that everyone's gone. 5 things you like about me,
Dave. I mean, like, this is my
episode, this is about me, It's your birthday, but I'm the host
and since it's about me, that. No, don't get no.
I swear that if you kick me. Right, guys, that that wraps up
what was a pretty fun episode. How do you feel that?
And obviously you've been there the whole time trying to
coordinate who's coming in and out of the room.
How did you feel it was? I'm just happy we got people in
and out of the room, to be honest.
Yeah, no, I think it was. It was a fun episode.
Then there wasn't too much over the top of each other.
I think it worked out well. And, you know, would be remiss
for me to just end my guest hosting of this podcast without
saying something nice about Shane.
And obviously as a as his best friend, really, you know, he has
very thick hair for a man of his age.
And that's where I'm going to maybe end that.
And if you just want to leave me here, I think there's one more
guest I'm trying to get here. So, you know, we'll see if we
can do that and you can take yourself out.
And then by proxy, I'll be taken out, I guess.
But I'm just going to hang here and see what else can happen.
But thank you for listening, guys.
Subscribe to the Patreon and do everything Else Tea with Me
podcast out on a month. Is it open to Wednesday and
Friday down? Yeah.
Yes, Wednesday and Friday, subscribe and iTunes across
everywhere else. And thank you guys, you suckers,
you sippers, for letting me host a happy birthday, Shane.
Hey, what's up? Happy birthday, Shane.
Chris, it's just, it's just me left.
Everybody's gone already. So it's just he's missed it.
You told me to call. Yeah, yeah, no, I said the call,
but everybody's gone. Obviously the time difference
you've you've messed up a couple of hours here.
It's just me sitting on the Internet by myself, so.
Yeah, well, fucking Shane. I mean, you know, this is what
happens to him. What an.
Asshole. Yeah, I know, but I mean I told
him hang on at a surprise for him.
But he said last time he hung on the Internet on a soon call, not
a surprise. It was a wee bit gay so.
He kind of he went. So.
I was going to surprise him, I was going to pull out my mangina
and y'all happy birthday, but I guess he'll never see it.
Now, no, we could have done that together, but he's an idiot, so
I'll let him know. He won't believe it's happened,
but I'll let him know anyway. And.
Could have munched my man ass for dinner but he fucked up.
Yeah, I know. Well, I'll tell him next time to
come in on an empty stomach. All right, well, be ready to go.
I got I got to go now. I got to untape my my tape my
Dick back to my ass for a joke for shake, but I got to I got to
go untape my Dick now. Right, OK, well see what if you
want, if you want to post the tape across the ME and I'll make
sure it gets to him when he's finished, he can.
There you go, brother. Yeah, that on Chris.
All right man, take it easy. All right, buddy, See you later.
Yeah, take it easy. Appreciate it.
Bye.