I'm really sorry I roosted. You know, Oh, no.
You want a hug? You're a lovely guy.
Oh. So nice So.
Nice. Now create a folder called The
Creepiest Things that Have Ever Happened on the TV podcast.
Do you want the hug? Yes.
And you just surrendered your head in the Tim's bosom. 20
years, that's going to be in the documentary.
Like like a heavy guitar rim. Surviving.
Sippers, welcome to this episode of the Tea with Me podcast with
me, Shane Todd. What an episode this was.
Before we get into it, let me tell you that we are coming live
to the Waterfront Hall Tea with Me podcast right in the heart of
Belfast in the amazing waterfront. 29th and 30th of
November. The 30th is sold out.
No. The 29th, 29th.
Is almost. There's a couple of single seats
available. OK.
And the 30th has some tickets left, eh, We are filming a promo
next week for that where we will announce the lineup.
Before we announce those lineups, it would be a good idea
to get the remaining tickets because once they're gone,
they're gone. Plus there's stand up at the
start and I was chatting to one of our guests and he's like, I'm
doing stand up on the other show that I'm not on.
And I didn't even know that. And I was like, that's amazing.
That's brilliant. So this is there's a hot ticket
is what it is. Tickets are in the description
for that team with me live at the Waterfront Hall.
And we're going to do a quick giveaway because we said we
would do that for a manscaped lawnmower 3.
We're going to a 3.2. 3.0 plus, yeah.
A 3.0 plus, not a 3.03 point 2 plus.
Yeah. And what do people have to do?
They had to comment. That the comment Hollywood Shave
under the Edinburgh app. Hollywood Shave under the
Edinburgh app with the Torio, Ryan and Andrew.
So, well, we just do this where you scroll up and down, I'll
stop, I'll start shout, No, I'll show stop.
That'll work too, yeah. OK, so just start going up and
down. Yeah, stop.
Eamon Brady. Eamon Bree.
If ever a man needed a shave down there, it's Eamon Brady.
I wonder, is that even Brady? Who is involved with the
football club I play for? If it is, I apologise even.
Don't know well enough to make that joke, but if you're not
that even, you need to sort that.
But there we go. So we'll get in touch with you
and we'll send that over. Friend, when he didn't win you
can go to. You go to manscape.com and use
the cool T with me for 20% off and free shipping.
Manscape, the number one in man's below the belt groom and
they've been sponsoring this podcast since pretty much the
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now, I saw one advertised on Facebook and it looked shit and
they're trying to copy manscaped, but the brand and on
it's awful. And you would I imagine you'd
get caught up with this thing. You know, you'd end up, you'd
end up looking like the top of an old grander's head because
they, they be cutting themselves a lot like anything like my
grand. He would close the garage door
in his head quite a lot. So his head was always cut and
he was quite tall. Kind of like the BFG.
But lovely man. Manscript have every product you
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Patreon. Pedro on the Comcast TV podcast.
If you've seen clips from the Lazy Boys podcast, the only
place you can get that is Patreon.
Here's what you're missing if you're not already on it.
You know when, Like, the piss should have been over ages ago,
but it just keeps going. Yeah.
And she just went. You're taking a pass.
Seriously. Seriously.
You. Were like, yeah man, you're
taking a piss again me a while. What you doing that for?
Blood clot man, all the way up here in Aberdeen.
You'll be taking a pissing in the house, you know.
I got Geordie so far and it's hard to it's hard to me taking a
piss against me while man. You may take my lives, you never
take my freedom. Is Geordie the most uninspiring
battle cry voice of all time? This is Sparta mate.
No man can kill me. I'm not a man.
You can't handle the truth best. I know what you're thinking.
Patreon.com/team Podcast bonus episode on Monday, Lazy Boys
live stream episodes on Friday, and all of our specials are on
there and only go on there and we might be announcing something
just on there pretty soon. Yeah, could be.
It might be on there already. Is it?
By the time this goes out, woo. I'm excited about that.
I'm excited about. The roast will be going
exclusively there and will never be made public because it can't.
And the roast of the pug nose little boy William Thompson, who
looks cool is malt that'll be on there.
Willy T OK who are so funny cutting edge guy got a face
philtre on me. Hilarious.
Yeah. Probably one of those googly
eyes we small features one and a short round ago there's no
philtre. OK yeah, that's very funny.
He's a philtre guy. See, Yeah, that's on the page on
the com section Me podcast, this episode that we just recorded,
I'll be honest, me and Willy T were not in the not in the good
headspace this morning. Early flight over from
Liverpool, late night, a bit of disruption with our
accommodation last night. It's all in the episode and we
had the legend that is Tim McGarry on and I went, let's not
do timid a service and come on with low energy.
After the pod recording, we were talking this is this is a Hall
of Fame episode of the TV with Me podcast.
It's one. Of my favourite times ever.
It's one of the best ever. Tim is a hero Willie tease a
hero for even being here this morning.
Fair play D thank you because I know you're a tired little boy
with your ailments. But we had a great episode to
please enjoy this episode of the team with me podcast with my
guests Tim McGarry and William Thompson don't fit in the
studio. It was I mean it's a 35 minute
flight from Liverpool. So me and well he just got back
from tour this morning and and it was it was great.
We should. We shared a bed last night.
We did that's. The first time, I mean, you were
shared a room. That's the first time we shared
a bed. Sorry, just to be clear, we've
started, have we? Yeah, it's OK.
I thought you're advertising things to shave your bollocks
and stuff like that. Actually it.
Is, can I say from sharing a bit, I know well it is a
manscape user, smooth, smooth as you like.
But William, I was nice sharing a bit with you.
I you know what, I thought you'd be more of a mover.
I normally AM. How big was the bed, by the way?
Was it? A small 00.
Right, OK. Small double.
Yeah. Was there accidental spooning
going on? There's.
A few times I went to turn around and you were facing my
way so. I was awakening.
Oh, you like to be on the other side?
No, I, I am a mover, right? But I did go to turn sometimes
and if I'd have turned like we would have been face to face.
There's no takes off of bed. So we said hold on, hold on,
hold on. It's.
Like short of short of bed with Pinocchio so.
This started at the roast, right?
So we'll talk about the roast of Only take Tim.
No one's ever mentioned my nose before.
This right yeah, your nose got a bit of AI know a roasted.
Like, and of all people, the pug himself, it's.
Because you've taken most of the nose I need.
You're, you're stealing those from people who need it.
You know what I mean? You're perfectly formed Roman
nose you have there. That's a Roman nose.
I don't know if I don't know if that's a compliment or not.
It's a fact the Roman nose is a long straight nose.
You never heard what? The Roman nose is historically a
massive, overly long, kind of pointy nose.
But it doesn't mean you're a lying bastard like Pinocchio.
It doesn't, clearly doesn't, because you're a lovely, honest
man and we know that. See the road you mentioned?
It started when we walked in here.
We started to roast each other. Yeah, I've still been in that
mode ever since the roast. So if anyone doesn't know the
roaster Willy T for William's birthday, the three of us were
on the panel. And I, when you started Tim, I
was like you'd mentioned during the week that you hadn't really
seen many of these, didn't really know the crack.
So I was like, Oh no, I don't think Tim gets a concept for the
rules. And I don't want people to be
roasting Tim. And then Tim has nothing to say
back playing Possum. Oh, Tim had planting to say to
us. Oh yeah, no, it was very nice.
It was very gentle. You called the lifes work shite.
Oh yeah? Well, yeah, your life we already
fucking What do you enjoy you by the way?
I'm. 20. 28 You have a bucket roast for your birthday.
You're 28 it. Was it was outstanding Like I
was, I was like, I don't know how if Temel will be his main or
like, oh, you fucking went for him.
Yes, that's what I worried. I worried like, look, we're all
going to RIP it back out of each other.
And I was like, you know, you, there's a lot of guys on the
panel. You wouldn't have known that.
Well, no, you know, I mean, I've been getting for a year and I
didn't know half them. But you went for and it was, it
was brilliant. I think people loved it because
people are probably used to the people that were in the
audience. They've seen, they've seen you
on TV where you're swearing sometimes, but it's not.
Yeah, it's cleaner. Whereas the the leash was off.
But I do like to say the odd bad word.
Not again. But I hadn't hadn't done that
before and I knew most of the people that some of them in
Thompson and people, but there were a couple of people going.
Did you did you enjoy it? I.
Did I really enjoyed it? I was very nervous beforehand.
He did it. Everybody were to Don here, you
know that he did it a favour because he said because we've a
new podcast at the minute. Yes.
And Don said, oh, you do Willie teacher.
Yeah, yeah. Do Willie.
Tim thought it was a dinner. Is there a carvery?
But basically you get up and slag each other off and say
horrible things. But yes, and.
You do that for some hours. Some of them was quite rude and
some of them. A lot of it was very rude.
It was bummed. It was really the audience
really went for. It it was packed out and
everybody was into it the whole time.
I love you, enjoy it, I enjoyed sitting watching it, and then I
gave the worst comedic performance I've ever given it
anything. I know Mickey Bartlett.
But I think me and Mickey had high expectations and we didn't
even come close to me. We fucking.
We both ate shit. What I'll say is you, you didn't
bring all your notes. You got confused.
It was so Willie T you got confused within your notes on
the lecterns. You didn't read out half of your
jokes. I look like just like a uni
lecturer who knows he's getting sacked at the end of the day.
Yeah, they're like, oh, I have 1.1.
I've lost. I seem to have lost my way.
You did. I know it was going by when I
was doing roasting, the one was laughing and I was going.
So it was. And I hate that because I love
roasts and I was the one who really pushed for it.
And then I'm the one who me and Mickey eat shit at it, but me
and Mickey both like we didn't come off and be like, no, that
was fine. We were both like, that was
fucking terrible. Mickey went.
Missing Mickey. Mickey disappeared.
Mickey. Ran.
Away. He just left.
Which man, when I was roasted everybody, Mickey was the one I
had the harshest ones for it kept.
Running to the loo or bar, I can't remember which bar, then
Lou at the same time it was two banks which.
Is meant when I was being mean to Mickey, it was an empty
chair. So I'm just being like, you're
going to die soon. Always away.
You're an alcoholic. Oh, he's on here.
OK. So it was just very awkward.
But you it was everyone was brilliant.
Yeah. It was good fun, yeah.
Is it online or something? It will.
But it'll be on Patreon. I dare say an edited version.
A little bit, a little bit. I think there's there's one
Fausties, right? One thing's getting taken out
and that's it. The whole thing stays.
Your nose? Come on, don't be so sensitive.
Top sense of the poem. You know why I hate it?
Because it's never been mentioned before.
Honestly find that hard to believe.
No one's ever like you have never turned around and they're
like. You take a lot of coke, but then
it. Wouldn't get in the system the
next week I can smell my Sunday dinners on a web the.
Dacian, the Dacian of Poke taken.
I mean, join us, get them tempted, get them.
Done. If me and you, I think if my
nose was valued like take off some of the length of my nose
and give it to you. We both have perfect noses.
You could take off length of your nose and I'd be two foot
taller mate. Like I could be 6/4 with some of
your nose. Well.
I do apologise, I was cruel about your looks, which was oh.
Sorry. You weren't even.
Top ten necessary and there's only 8 on.
It was very funny. What did you say about my looks?
Again, I was cruel about your look.
I said that you were the model for that statue of the Queen in
Antrim, one of the corgis that. Was very good.
That was that was very. Fun.
Did you drop any jokes on the night I did?
Yes, I would. I had it written down and I kind
of hadn't rehearsed it, so I think I missed a couple.
So I I literally. Dropped jokes.
I'll get you again the tour. Just ring me two in the morning.
Fucking forgot to say. Zippers, let me very quickly
interrupt this episode that gives me a podcast to tell you
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Nor VPN. Let's get back into this
episode. We just came back from Liverpool
with a bit of a nightmare last night after the gig.
The show started an hour later. He lives for this we've become
an old married couple under and he's the.
Shit I get right because I I'm forgetful to him because head
injuries tend to make you do that and everyone gives me,
gives me a lot of grief because I'm not organised and I forget
things. Yes.
What's this story, Shane? So.
Taking a big long sip from this cup of justice.
Thank God I'm getting a break from them this week.
Right. So the the show was supposed to
start a half year. That's the latest.
I like a show to start latest, but then the venue chopped and
changed things a bit. That's that's beyond my control.
Is that right? That's not your fault at all.
That's fair. You were meant to be in one
room, show over on, you have to be in a different room and went
on at a later time. OK.
So I say to Willy, look, we have an early flight in the morning.
Let's be ret. We need to get out of here
because a lot of time what I'll do is we'll go backstage, we'll
have a quick chat and then we'll go out and if there's anyone
still hanging around, get a photo, we'll say hello.
But I went. We can't do that tonight because
there's far too many people. It's Liverpool, people will be
wanting to have pain. You are saying you quite and
there's groupies and all waiting for you, yes.
Well, how many people were in Manchester?
One single person who went to school well.
Yeah, 1. Person.
Well, he's made. He went to school.
I literally went right. We'll go out and see who's still
hanging around here. We'll say hello.
One person. In Glasgow there was Clive
Anderson who actively walked away from us.
Yeah, that's right, Clive Anderson.
Yeah, Clive Anderson came to see my Glasgow show.
Yeah. Really.
Yeah. And by the way, Tim.
Didn't like it, Tim. Didn't like it?
Never mentioned. His opinion on the train to say,
by the way, this work, we didn't.
Here's the thing. How you doing here?
That was two stars, so I. Just doing, I just doing his
show the next day in Glasgow. So it's really for sure loose
ends. All right, all right.
So he's like, I'll come to the show then.
I prefer. I love the way you said that.
You're like, yeah, because there's no way Clive Anderson
was. Coming.
I was on the region, yeah. So, so big.
Clive came along, right? And we were told like, Clive's
going to be here. A friend who does know Clive
Anderson, 90s. Yeah, Tokyo host.
Yeah. Whose line is it anyway?
Mike Clive Anderson have. To be with that, they're all
yours. Sorry.
Clive Anderson was at the show. So I'm just smelling the future.
You die. So yeah, Clive and Clive came
alone. And then after the show, we
went, I'd see if anybody wants it because they say people
normally come round to the back if you want to get a photo,
whatever. And the only person nervous,
Clive and the producer of a show, Clive was waiting for his
Uber, but we thought he's waiting for us, like to say like
Weld on the show. And I was like, oh, Clive, I was
like, nice to meet you. Thanks so much for coming to the
show. And Clive went yeah, yeah, he's
like saving for the show tomorrow, though.
Don't, don't give me all the gold.
And I was like, no, no, just mean.
I'm just saying like, thanks for thanks for coming and I'll see
you. And he's like, get your
breakfast tomorrow and then come on over to the show.
And then Willie went to like introduce himself and Clive's
like, ah, same for the show guys.
I'm. Not on the show.
Left. And then the next day at the
show, he was like, I was at your show last night.
I went, yeah, yeah, yeah. So what?
He never. He never.
Gave an awful big nose. Remember the one point I made it
really awkward just before he left because he's like, oh you
2, you two travel. To he doesn't speak any.
He's not a whole life. I.
See a mediaeval king. You two travel together.
You and the you and the invalid boy.
You and the boy. Yeah, you and the weed off you
and Tiny Tim, fluent officer Scott.
Does Clive speak? You and the boy, you travelled
together and I looked Clive Anderson dead in the eye.
Went yeah, he's my Dolly. Yeah, no, yeah, you made it
worse because I put my foot and I went yeah, I went me and well
he travelled 5 given us no chop and wait.
He's waiting for a zero because we thought he's witness.
He's waiting for a zero. And I said yeah, when he goes
does he do all the shows with you And I went yeah, I said I'm
his down to he's my wee son because I talk about my kids
during the shows. I mean, he's my son when a
monitor and William look Clive Anderson in the eye and when
he's my daddy. And then sort of did we face the
Clive and Clyde didn't like. It.
I'll walk, yeah. I didn't even like, give a wee
smile and the kid of his job was filled up on.
He's my darling, yeah. Well, you're a Radio 4.
You've made it then. Have you really for loose ends?
No one's mentioned that it did it.
Do you know what I mean? Like there's no right, OK.
But but it was. Good.
It was right. Do you know he was on Ian
Rankin? Ian Rankin all.
Right. Well, he's.
A nice guy. But it was it was fun.
It was sort of like they do it in the foyer.
BBC Scotland. Right.
And you just chat, you don't do a stand up routine or.
No, there was music and stuff on the show, but he he's great.
You can you can tell Clive just taking it easy now.
Yeah, he's just taking. It easy of an age.
But he's he was great. But we did Liverpool last night,
do the game. It's going to be late and I said
William. What would you do?
You support him? What's going on?
What do you? Do so I do open in 20.
Right. Yeah, at the shows and.
What do you do? 70 and.
Then after I tell him go no, no, it sounded great from where I
was. They were laughing at me.
Honestly, there were smilers. They weren't laughing.
You're a good one in Manchester. Oh my death.
Sorry. Crazy that Williams.
That applause break was great, but.
Then we must be medium. Finished.
Yeah, we. Must be mediums because William
died in Manchester. We're still communicating with
the. Blood and the shirt.
I'm not so large, boy. So we did the.
Game not bad gigs. Yeah.
Yes, really. Yeah, not all of them, but of
course. Often enough for myself, yeah.
He's lying, but. I ate shed quite a lot like.
Right. But we know.
Shut up. That was another topic of the
roast. Yeah, so we did Liverpool
because I want this story to be out there.
So yeah, what happened? So I said that.
I said that. Willie, listen, I booked an Uber
for 5 minutes before I get off stage.
You'd be waiting in it and I'm gonna, I left a cap and a
tracksuit top right by the back of the stage.
I went, I'm going to run off stage, grab my hat, put my
jacket on and run out undetected under the radar.
I get into the Uber with you said 10 seconds left before he
was going to be like, I need to cancel the fair.
So it's like an action movie. I bundle in, let's go work for
the crowd, get out because we had a real early start.
We'll get to our apartment to check in.
This is like half 11:00 tonight to check in.
We've got to get up really early and I realised that you needed
to do something, you needed to pre register your details to get
an access code. By the way, this is like we're
an old married couple and you found a new husband because the
way you both look at each other, they're.
Typical. Yeah, Well, what do I expect?
So you were standing outside at half 1111?
Yeah, and it was fresher. So all the UNI students are
walking past and there's a bit of mayhem on the street.
And Clive Anderson. Walker, Fred.
So I, I don't know, I don't know what to do.
I was like, Jesus, I, I go up to the code to try and see if I've
got the e-mail. It's not let me do it.
But then on booking.com I realise what it will let me do
is cancel this accommodation from no charge, even though it's
the night of. So I was like, right, we'll wait
for it. We went to McDonald's.
Tim, I'm having a McDonald's 1145.
Like that's not dosage. Really skimming over the part
where he forgot to enter his details.
Now we don't have a place to stay.
Yeah, and I'm being so nice about it.
You were nice about it, but then I said you weren't going to
McDonald's, so you were happy because I knew what would make
you happy. I was going to wait till you
went to bed and go anyway, but like this.
Yeah, is your daddy come on to McDonald's like a happy main
son? You get what?
What type of milkshake you want, Willy?
And I'm only 20. It's I'm.
Like, I take William the McDonald's.
I look like a social worker. So there was the guy who'd been
stabbed in the face beside us in the queue.
Holy yeah, picking up his Nuggets so casually.
Genuinely, he had slices down his face on neck, pouring blood
out of his face. Just wait.
Like just being like, oh, is that there's my Nuggets are
there and you're doing go, go Liverpool.
So nobody's looking twice like there's no, yeah, there's no
scene. But then he's like, oh, sorry, I
think I ordered a Diet Coke. I'm like you are open.
Yeah, skin is open. Yeah.
So there was just a bit of mom. Homeless guy kept trans fight me
as well. That's right, I was 2.
Times Tim this guy I forgot this bit of the story.
I loved it. There was a homeless guy like
kept coming up to us. It followed us down the street
and he went, could you guys spare change for a hostel and
I'll give you a bag of coke. And in my head I was sort of
thinking, say we give you a Tanner.
How much is it? Like it felt like a bad
business, like whole back on the offer of the Coke.
But he goes, yeah, I need A room.
For the nose from about half a night, that guy, that guy is.
Who's to blame for bullying? The Genies out of the ball, he's
not going back in. Evil Mcgara.
So it used to be a brilliant businessman.
Nice homeless guy to. Get into a hostel was bothering
us in the McDonald. He was, you know what you sort
of guy like just trying to make small talk but you're like, are
you like go away? And Willie went so Belfast with
his accent when he was talking to him, like he came up to us
and he was like any change for a hostel.
And I was like literally of 0 change like no cash on me.
And well he's like yeah, I made no money.
The guy went, what do you have tonight lads?
And Willie went or just doing a show, mate?
No, no, just doing a week. No, no, no, you're skipping
about 5 minutes of dialogue here.
Yeah, it's he gone. What you doing over in fucking
Liverpool? And I'm like, we're working.
It's like you're from Belfast or you mate.
I'm like, yeah. Yeah, around the docks.
Born and bred. Like what part I was at?
Shipyard. You said you're from a shipyard.
He's like I was in the Army and he was, he was clearly trying to
get a rise out of me, yes or us by being like I was in the Army,
you know, I served in Belfast and all and I'm like, I don't
fucking care like. I don't get a fuck.
I'm trying to get my fault on knowledge here.
No, no, you're saying I put on a more No, no, the accent I put on
the I'm fucking really tired and have cerebral palsy.
I can't move my jaw. Maybe if we had checked in and
got a bed I wouldn't have this voice.
OK. Because I was doing that.
I'm really, you know that. That's just me not moving my
jaw. So in McDonald's we still
haven't been sent the code to get in now that I have
registered for the condition. So I went boom.
I'm just cancelling that. It's not going to cost us
anything. So I just booked us an airport
hotel. So we had to get the bus to the
airport hotel. So that was kind of like the
upside of it. Yeah, that was a nice.
We had a nice. When we woke up, we were right
by the airport, but spirits were good.
Yeah, we would do. Like, here's the thing, Willy T
will get on with it and just say fantastic to anything, no matter
how bad things are going. I'm like, oh, this isn't we'll
have to go stay. We have to get a boss.
Well, he's like, fantastic. Which which I because I'm not
met with that same energy by. Anything else things?
When I boss things up, worst guy in the world stupid we attention
fat bastard all the names you. He hits me with belts and all
which I asked him to do but I everyone everyone's all mean to
me and then when they balls things up I'm like it's fine
don't worry about it. So, Willie.
You're a lovely person, I'm really sorry I roosted you.
Know. You want a hug?
You're a lovely guy. Oh.
So nice, so nice. Just create a folder called The
creepiest things that have ever Happened on the TV podcast.
Do you want the hug? Yes.
And you just surrender your head in the Tim's bosom. 20 years,
that's going to be able to talk about like a heavy guitar rim.
Surviving the. Only BBC presenter who?
Hasn't done that in a long time. I was 29, I was 20, 9 when it
happened. You're just happy to have a daft
figure. Offer you a hug.
Yeah, I got a McDonald's on a hug from now, so that's one of.
The. Best moments of my life, you
know. You know what, to change it, you
know the way. So we did Manchester on Tuesday,
Liverpool Thursday on wet. I just went home in between for
a day. Just kind of hang out with the
kids. Willie.
Willie stayed in Liverpool. Matching the your kids.
And I did. Willie was staying in Liverpool,
so we did a gig and he got a soul for the crash on another
comedian choice. That apartment was booked for
two days. I didn't realise what's.
Up. You could have been.
You could have been there. It was all right.
How do you had? It was lovely.
Let me stay so it was no difference.
Are you like back in the day, Tim?
Would you, could you have been a sofa surfer?
Could you have done that? Oh, my, yeah, That kind of guy.
Like you could. Just yeah, 100% yeah.
We went to Edinburgh way, way back in the early 80s, mid 80s
and Edinburgh no stage was a lot smaller.
He's. Not funny, father.
Big nose bastard, that's a comeback, get him to him.
And the first time we went there were about 30 of us in the cast.
You know, there were mates and all of that and there were, you
know, we had, we booked a house for about 8 people and there
were about 30 people stayed there.
It was just madness. But it's bright.
Like yeah, you couldn't do it now, but.
No, I couldn't do it now, but it was the one stage.
We were in the house for about a fortnight and people kept coming
and going and coming and going. One day there were three guys
sitting on the sofa and they looked down and they noticed
something in the what is that? There's some movement in the
sofa and they pulled up the cushions and they'd been a box
of KFC or something and had gone maggoty and they were maggots
all over the sofa and three guys and rushed up and threw the sofa
literally out onto the outside the front door of this of this
place we were staying just as the landlord walked past.
Well, how you going lads? If we.
Make sure this wasn't an episode to give my head.
We were through all the sofa, yeah.
That was because that was exactly the same for us.
Like me and Sean Haggerty went to the Fringe years ago, maybe
2012 or something, and the sketch group that the owner and
Aaron Butler and David all were in, they had a apartment booked
and there was way too many of them for it.
But then everyone ended up just going to stay with them.
We were like, fuck our accommodation, we're just going
to stay with them. So it was like overcrowded, but
it was brilliant and like everyone's stuff was all over
the place. But it was great.
But the idea of doing that now, you could still probably do that
now I. I don't know, maybe.
You could think you could do. That I'm yeah, yeah.
And I'm also, you know what I'm like?
I'm very fret like I can live with anyone.
Yeah, I'm a very easy house guest.
Like I'm I keep myself to myself, but every time.
That's what they say about serial killers on school
shooters. No, they say, he keeps.
Himself to himself now, they say.
He keeps himself to himself. He was a he was a nice guy, but
he kept himself to himself. You can't say I'm a great house
guest. That's for other people to say
I. Mean I get.
You don't know. Maybe you say you get told that.
Oh no, no, if I was going to make up a rumour about myself,
it wouldn't be I'm a lovely house guest.
It would be like, I'm beautiful, big, big penis on me.
No, but those are true. So that's not a lie.
But no, people always doubt. People are saying all the time,
Williams, just come stay with us.
All the time. We just go to health.
We just go to David Lloyd James on tour.
Do you? Because, well, he's a member, so
we get to a guest pass. Of do you get the DLA thing?
Do you think the DLA stands for David Lloyd?
All the reducing your DLA? You're not like the sauna
anymore Then where? Where's the furthest your tour
takes you? You're doing like any skill.
Oh, I'm doing any skill in. The dairy would Will you stay or
will you just drive? I'll stay a couple of places,
might stay in Derry. Love stay in the Derry love
Derry playing the Playhouse Korean and a skill in love and a
skill in as well so. Is your tour pretty much
back-to-back like consecutive nights where you get a week?
No. We are the first ones.
I don't know when this is going to the first one is tonight in
Antrim and then it's. Not today.
It's going today. Not going today.
Thanks very much. So there's still tickets
available unfortunately. But no, it's 16 / a month and a
bit. So yeah, all over the place and.
Do you have a routine like? Do you have a?
Yeah, talk for an R. That's the that's the only the
laugh a wife does for her husband.
He's. Like a toy, he's a bold one.
Sorry, Tim, let me rephrase it. Yeah, please.
How many superstitions when you do your shows?
Like do you like to get to the venue certain amount of time
before the show starts? Yeah, I'm a bit of a warrior.
I'm a piercer up and down beforehand.
They need a sort of half hour me own and kind of go, you know,
where I'm and what's the stuff and go over go over the set and
stuff like that. Do you think that comes from
your like being a solicitor background?
Being a solicitor or your lawyers was a solicitor, yeah.
Yeah. But do you think that because
you would have to well. You bring that?
Are you in trouble or something? You need help?
Did any legal advice? I started the guy McDonald's
Liverpool last night but do what I mean is.
Is it possession of? You would put, yeah, massive
nose. Do you think?
With big lanky fingers, though, what?
Clive Anderson was a lawyer. A lot of ex lawyers became
comedians. But Mortimer, Yeah.
But that's so such a meticulous job, right?
To like. Not the way I did it, but yeah.
But if you have a case, you have to obviously plan, you have to
do research, you have to and you're training for the.
So like methodical. Do you think that you are a
piercer and put so much planning into your gigs and all that kind
of thing? Because like you brought that
across from that background, as in you put you're thinking so
much before the thing. Well, I just, I'm a bit of a
warrior. I'm always was a warrior.
You know, I hit the certain comedians.
Delamere is one of them comedians.
You know, when you're backstage with Delamere and you're
chatting the way about this out the other and let it go.
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Neil Delamerey.
He goes right away. I'm away on.
Oh, yeah, yeah, just down his own stage and does it.
And I'm going no, no, if I'm more than 10 minutes and leave
me alone to make the back maybe, you know, piercing up and down
and worrying and stuff and. If it's new stuff, I'll like a
bit of time to myself, but I, I, if I Pierce and go away by
myself, that's when I'll get nervous.
So I like to just be chatting like this and then bring me on
because then we're backstage, we're laughing, we're laid back.
Then I'll take that on the stage.
The quietness makes me nervous. I like talking to people too
because it's like you're almost just like sharpening your
conversational skills. I'm the same as you.
If I'm sitting by myself, I worry about the joke and I
rewrite it and I rewrite it and then it.
I kind of ruin it because I've just sat and written it and
written it over again. So I'm the same as you.
I need to sit and talk to someone.
I lose my mind. What's the show called?
Ridiculous because it's based on my late father who always said
you should said we take ourselves too seriously in this
country and we should always have a sense of rude and
ridiculousness. He did a nice dry sense of
humour. So I'm talking about him.
He used to be a surgeon in the matter of hospital back in the
dark days of the Troubles and stuff.
And so a bit about, you know, the history of him and stuff,
and just a few stories about him and the ridiculous nature of
Northern Ireland and stuff like. That what did he would he was he
around to see your work like. No, that's one of the sad
things. He died in 1991 just as we had
started and we we had our first radio series, Perforated Ulster
in 1991, which went on to win the Sony Award.
And he heard most of it and really liked it and stuff and in
fact really quite poignant. Genuinely, this is quite moving.
I only found this out about a month ago.
My sister found a thing, a letter that my dad had sent her
a week before, a month before he died.
And he said this thing, he sent this, my sister a letter said,
but you know, she was living in London at the time.
And she said, oh, just to let you know, Timothy and his mates
are now very much flavour of the month on stage, radio and TV.
And he said, I'll get you his autograph dot dot dot if we ever
catch up with him. Oh.
Genuine she just literally focus.
You know what I'm doing the show I'm talking about my dad just
find this so he hadn't really seen much of it.
Mother God lover. She didn't like it.
Really. She didn't like the swearing,
she didn't like the anti Catholic stuff, and she said we
we kept shouting all the time, right.
She wasn't a huge fab and the what though it did hear one.
But I have a brother who's who's was a was as a cat was still as
a cat was. Intelligent family.
Yeah, I'm a stupid woman. He's the he's as a cat was used
to be in the Alliance party and he was on the radio quite a bit,
you know, for various things. And I was on the radio quite a
bit at the same time. And my mother always didn't
said, I don't really like that. Would you go back to the law?
There's always a job from the law.
And but she was stopped at the shops.
One time my sister told me this story.
She was stopped at the shops. But this woman said, oh, Mrs
McGarry, I heard your son on the radio yesterday.
And my mother went, oh, really? Which one?
Yeah, I had that thought. Like part of the show I'm doing
at the minute, it's very much about family and I talk in it
about I wish my granny had seen me do stand up.
So my mom and dad come to shows and see shows and that kind of
thing. But like I love my because my
granny is huge part of my inspiration for comedy, like
real working class sense of humour and and worked in
Gallagher's tobacco factory and it just was like the the queen
and I felt like just the centre of the family.
And I would I was doing stand up when she was still around.
But the early years of me doing something you never would have
brought your grounding to come and see that.
But I wonder what what she would think.
You know what you think. But she would.
She would tell you. Like what?
One of the other things I discovered this year's were part
of the reason for doing the show is this guy on of contacted me
on Facebook and sent me a DVD of doctors and consultants in the
matter hospital doing a show. Like they were doing songs and
bits and pieces. And my dad literally got up and
did stand up. He told stories and I do not
Well, I knew you'd eat a very dry sarcasi to read a nice sense
of you told a story very well. But I'd never seen this before
and he's literally standing in front of 100 people telling a
couple of stories. Me, the delivery was superb and
all that. I can't tell you the jokes.
They weren't very woke. I'm going to be honest with you.
It was it was, it was the 1980s, right?
I'll tell you how on book it was.
This is the Ferrari show Doctors.
And they literally did. They literally did.
A tribute to the black and white men shows the literally Oh no.
And some of his jokes, Oh, don't go there, don't know.
Who was working the wards? At the time you're clean from
the. Chest is there, doctor Nearly up
there going to Chinese fellas. Roy Walker, Frank Oxon, Jimmy.
We've lost. Them Mammy.
Shot and wheeled into the matter and again, a black face.
I'm research. But his, his timing and his
poise and his diary and he was trying to tell a story.
Bloody hell, he was really very good.
I love like you could get too into, but my dad has millions of
old family photos, millions and like the old time when you see
if it's addictive, looking through them when you see
something you haven't seen before from going back.
It's it's it's amazing. Yes.
We've seen so much old camcorder footage and I've never properly
gone through it all, but I will at some point.
But God, yeah, it's it's, it's my.
Look at old family footage of like you and be like, see what
you're like as a kid and be like, oh, I was a bastard.
I wasn't a bastard. I was in what way?
Every, every recording of me ends with me punching the
camera, right? Or like that's hacking the
cameraman or trying to head. But someone I was, I don't know
why, just the angriest kid, right?
And so every recording, everyone's having a nice time.
And then I come into the room, start screaming and then like
trying to kick the camera out of the hands.
Every single one. I was a lovely kid.
You have issues. Were you adopted?
Yeah. By me at the start of this.
I know you meant that as a roast, and it got really
awkward. I was like, yeah, yeah, turn my
life around times, actually. Well done.
Should you show me that? I'm doing my 3rd about it.
Makes a change in fucking cerebral palsy.
Are you doing one about high Catholics and problems?
Yeah, it's very new. I love you so much.
I have to be careful and put my head back that over the start of
the tour is always fun. Start of the tour is always fun.
You're just excited to just do the material and and do it
because then by the end you. You I did a couple of warm ups
in Laveries and I was really pleased very well.
Yeah, he said. He actually said that.
I was the oldest person in the room by about 30 years, wasn't
it? Yeah, yeah.
You did do one, but I'm not going to give it away.
But you did one bit and we were all at the back, like, yeah, I'm
not. Just a black and white minstrel
but he does 3 minutes of makeup and.
I think I need a hog now. That's what the documentary is
going to be. Enough.
I'm the one. Yeah, you find out he's an
orphan and then demand the hug. What?
You adopted were you get you cancelled very easily.
Tim, has there ever been has there ever been like a joke say
on the blame game that you made that you were gutted they
wouldn't leave in like does any stack out or even from get my
headpiece a line where you went you were just gutted that it
didn't either make the call? Give me a headpiece.
Well, I I'm quite lucky and give me a headpiece.
I technically am the first person ever in Northern Ireland
television history to say fuck sorry it's different gig.
Oh I've saved that for the show. It's a big closure after the
black and white. Mcgarry's give me.
Please, I'm trying to sell tickets here.
Reason a Buccaneer. By the way, why did you fool me
at 6:00? Who pulled out?
Who was unavailable? The roast?
No today for this. Oh, no, no, no.
We're just just being on terror. We'll just leave it late.
Oh, right you were. He was annoyed to be asked
yesterday too. I got asked yesterday as well
by. The way looking like this.
Can you also come in early tomorrow?
I'm like fuck off. I haven't slept since July.
But are you not here all the time?
I'm a lot of I'm here. I they keep me in a week
covered. He lives in the studio.
Yeah. Water them at night.
But I'm also like, I've been flat out since July very.
I'm Finland. You're like Jim Allister or
Nolan, aren't you? You're never you.
Know. Oh oh right, I thought you call
me a fat cunt. You're the 1st for.
The first person to say in a locally produced say fuck in a
locally produced TV show and two ceasefires in a wedding.
What was the 95? But the BBC had a big was the
two ceasefires in a wedding was the pilot show and there was a
lane in it. The Billy the Peeler had was
marrying my daughter and was watching a Rangers match and I
rang up Gerry Adams to try and get the ceasefire broken so we
could do and I saved the chair, said no, we can't break the
ceasefire. And I said it's all right for
you, you don't have a fucking peeler in your front room.
Supporting Glasgow Rangers and the BBC that we had meetings
about whether or not I should say fucking or bucking.
They recorded two different versions and they only
eventually allowed the naughty version to go out.
But before the programme without, they said there'll be
an item of strong language 26 minutes into the programme,
which was great because people went this will probably be
shaped, but I'll wait 26 minutes.
Yeah, people ask, I see on the we'll talk about the podcast you
started, but people go do another two ceasefires like
people want like the the like a new version of it or like a
current type thing. So bizarre to the the subject
matter you're talking about there is shooting someone dead.
Yeah, and BBC's concern is? Yeah, for.
Yeah, yeah, shoot them in the flipping face.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, because. You missed the troubles of great
days. I caught, I caught the end of
them, you know what I mean? I was like, why is everyone so
excited about this agreement? What's going on?
If you look at the historic pictures of the Good Friday
Agreement, you just see Tim raging in the background.
Genuinely happened with the IRA on a ceasefire 1984.
People would ask you to work now.
No more jokes now, but. I think so. 2 ceasefires and
when was out the year before I was born. 1985.
Yeah, so I've always grown. Up 86.
Yeah, 96. Good master.
SO I can't talk. I'm so shit I had to think
about, right? You sniff that?
But so I've always grown up with it on the TV and I was a huge
fan of it growing up to the point when I remember going in
the first year I was 12 years old, my mom and dad told me if I
got a good report, my first from my first report in first year,
they get me tickets to go see give my headpiece live in the.
Operation See alive. No, I had a terrible report that
didn't get me the and I cried because they didn't.
They weren't Will get you a surprise.
But what my parents would do is if I wasn't, they wouldn't get
me in any way. They would go, you were bad.
They literally do. Here's what you could have won.
Oh. Seriously.
Yeah, and they showed me the tickets.
And when you're not? Going to have jumbled.
Yeah, my mom was too was that he was bully woman so they would
show me the tickets ago. You're not going Seriously.
I balled my dad because I. Didn't check cruelty, that's
awful. It'd have been check cruelty to
take him. Oh, but was there no age that's
was the with the live shows? Like was it just a recommended
age? There was.
A recommended age because there was a few bad words.
Yeah. Yeah, it was.
Kind of. I remember I told, I told you I
had a VHS. I remember a VHS that he loved
it. I get my hairpiece that he loved
it. It just felt like the best thing
about it was it was like a boat here.
It was as it was happening and it was like swear and it was.
It was very edgy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, there was a lot of politics and a lot of people
were very unhappy at the time. You know, yeah, yeah.
You know, you can't make fun, you know, when the troubles
you're on and all of that. And it was the kind of reliefs
for people go and, you know, finally we can talk about what's
happening, say, you know, but I mean, not a bit blue smoke up
yours as well. But it is nice that you know
younger people, I think saw for the first time people in
Northern Ireland come by funny and make a living out of.
This Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know we can, and we ever.
Were you ever asked to do like a movie or anything?
No being serious. No, no, unfortunately we made
the big mistake. BBC Northern Ireland said would
give me a headpiece, said look, this is genuine, this is for BBC
Northern Ireland. It's going to be about Northern
Ireland and it's very interesting.
We've done, there were some of them went on network and did all
right, did OK on some of them are on, some of them are on the
iPlayer somewhere. On iPlayer they do OK, but it
was very English. People kind of look at it and
go, you can't say that. Yeah.
What do you think about who the fuck is Master Enemy and what's
what is in the Yomi long, you know, that sort of thing?
Yeah. So they, they and it was very
insular about Northern Ireland power, but it was deliberately
so, you know, we made the mistake of not, you know,
writing dairy girls and being multimillionaires.
Yeah. I tried writing Dairy Girls too,
and they didn't like it. So it's not easy.
Yeah. And then like when I did it, but
here, here's one question I've always had.
Forgive my headpiece. And this is like a real nerd
question about it. In the early episodes, Carl has
a different voice. In the first episode he sort of
two ceasefires in a wedding, Yes, because two ceasefires in a
wedding was initially A1 off was supposed to be and it was a piss
take of all the bad Northern Ireland dramas, the serious
Northern Ireland dramas like the Billy plays and the Crying Game
and stuff. So it was and every single one
of those was written by an English guy.
Always had a a guy doing a really bad Northern Ireland
accent, right? And it always.
What are you talking a big town? Exactly Oh, wait, conflicts and
Protestants get on together and then they do and then there's a
bomb and somebody gets blew up. So it was a it was meant to be a
piss take on a one off and it was so various people went you
know what gauge if I keep produced something here that is
has got legs. So it started out as a.
Party yes, started as a started off as a sketch and.
What was the difference in in demons, the voice that they
moved? In he would talk like he was
kind of daddy. Yeah, an evil eye or a guy
daddy. We would destroy them, Daddy, It
was really different. Yeah, it was completely
different. Yeah, we decided to drop that
after that. After that I've.
Always wondered why that was. And the forgive me, the guy
plays Uncle Andy. I don't know what he read, does
he? I am.
Is he one of the most stopped people?
No, because he doesn't look like Uncle Andy and he doesn't have a
moustache or, say, Burns. Or he he could have, I feel like
he could have played into that. So like with so much like TV
ads? Marty is a brilliant actor and
it's been in other bits and pieces, but not many.
And because he made the decision very early on that he he was
made a demon Quinn and where they acted together and he's and
give me hit peace. But he made the decision very
early. He didn't want to be an actor
and has a full time job in Queens University as a systems
analyst, a very high up systems analyst in Queens and just said
I'll do the TV show and stuff and but he never wanted to if.
Something was wrong. Exactly, exactly.
A really good character actor. Really good.
Something was Derek as well. We.
Were talking about that yesterday, literally by chance
we were talking. About.
But I've been starting to say Marty Reid, you know, people go,
I want to pick you. Where's Uncle?
Uncle, there are just. I imagine if something goes
wrong with the system, it goes. Like this.
That is what you do, do you? Don't go around this.
Moving. Have you had people?
Did you have people like back in the day, like ask to be in it,
you know, call me, you know, were were local celebrities.
But yeah, get me into that. Yeah, yeah, We had.
We had Julian Simmons. We had Patty, Katie.
Were they all in it or people? Yeah.
People who were in it, some of them had asked to be in it as
well. Paul Rankin and people like
that. We had Geordie Best was in it.
Geordie Best? No.
Yeah. George Best did a wee cameo for
us. What?
Was the same. Well, we did.
This. We had this.
Did you say bar box? Bar.
Thought you were being offensive.
Do we have this stupid plot based on a true story of a guy
we knew who was a brilliant footballer and got an offer from
a certain football club. Don't do this Daisy.
And would like would like the certain person to sign for a
certain club. And his dad didn't tell him and
RIP up the letter. And he only found like 10 years
later that his dad stopped him being seriously.
So we had this one. Can you say what the club is
we're like? No.
So we did this, we did this, we did this parody of that where
Carl was a superb footballer and Celtic wanted him.
I've seen really sure I remember.
Him and that basically ripped up the letter because he wanted to
go to an anti H block March. He ruined his career forever.
And we interviewed Jodie Best and you know, we had Jackie
Fuller interviewing Jordie best going.
Who's the best footballer you've ever seen?
Was it Pelley? Was it Maradona?
He said no, no, it was just kid Kal.
You know, he was wonderful to me.
Now this range of Bell, another genius, you know, Jackie Fuller
and said, well, why do you think he didn't go on?
And Jody Wilfeld maybe didn't want the booze and the birds and
all the money. And then the two of them just
burst out loud. Because I also remember 1 scene
I always remember from give my head face I hate and I don't
know how I have this knowledge off the top of my head.
It was in the initial final episode of it and definitely
found out that Liam Neeson, she had a fling with Liam Neeson but
dad didn't like him so he tells him to fuck off basically and
she shoots dad dead. Yeah but there's this big scene
where like lame. It's meant to be lamely since
the back of him and he's just being like anyone from Ballymena
is a prod in my book. Slams door and goes here I'll
take him for the wife and takes the flowers and chocolates off
then shots in the game. I fucking love that scene.
Did you, Did you film that? Were you there when, George?
Cres shot his thing. Sadly I wasn't there.
It was. We did it in Windsor Park.
I didn't get to meet him but the rest of the crew got to meet
him. Said he was lovely, he was
great. You know you ever meet him?
No, fortunately, no. No, that's mad that he was.
And he was great, too. He was a very good performer,
right? Jackie Fullerton, you're right.
There's no good arm. There's one that's bottom, one
that's better. Not bad.
I can't wait to be regular on the blame game.
You did do the blame. Game, he was great.
Twice. Yeah, he was great.
Waste twice fucking let you. Back you let me back.
He was really good. I thought first time I was.
First time I was too nervous. Second time I enjoyed it far
more. Yeah.
And I I'm like you. I don't react well like under.
Simmons. Someone's like this is it.
This is your shot. I crumble like fuck I, I don't
react well under. Because you love like, that's
like almost like your dream thing.
Because you love politics, like, yeah, hugely into it.
And obviously comedy. So I remember you being like so
buzzing to do it. Because I grew up like love and
blame game. Have I got news for you and mock
the week. So I almost like like aimed my
life at being a political comedian and then got older and
I was like, I just, I don't like annoying, like I'd like
irritating people, but I don't like making people jam widely
upset and I don't like them hitting me, which when you do
politics. Would be doing great.
They don't hate you. Tim, you're, you're making a
pioneer in step of going into the podcast world now.
Yeah, and it's a common thing, yeah.
There's something in, it's going somewhere.
I'd use. Movies are going to have sound
soon. I just talked about that for a
long time. Or was it just?
After out for ages and then we saw many tickets you sold and
went what? Yeah.
So yeah, we finally and a lot of people had said you should do a
podcast. You should do a podcast.
Yeah. So we are.
It's called Give Me a Podcast, basically about comedy and
politics and life and culture. And I very kindly were our first
guest. Well, I love it when you just
talk about here and you just talk about the show about get my
hairpiece and and maybe like specific scenes you had the
shoot or even the idea of George Best being you know, I love, I
think the the such fandom around the show.
Some people love hearing those stories like I listened to my 1
and I had such a good tendon, but I was like talk about me,
let you know. I want to hear about used more
than I. People will want to hear more
from used than me, I think. Well, we're mixing it up.
We have we have alley Ford is we're going to get some of the
some of the other Mario Patty Jenkins is on Patty's brilliant
Patty told a great story about Patty Patty Jenkins, who won an
Oscar for a short film what an after and couldn't go to the
Oscars because he was on stage and don't public arts centre
given they said beast like. What was?
Because Supreme Leader Tim wouldn't let him.
Attend the Oscar David Hull. Was that for ups and downs?
He won the four? What did?
He no, no, that was for the an Irish goodbye.
Yes, yeah, he's some actor. Party.
Well, he's in blue lights and he's, yeah, he's up for a local
RTS award for Best Actor for Happy the Party Please.
Yeah, yeah, he's so good in that.
But but I I love it and I think it's the different ways we're
doing as well. And it's a great list of the
episode with Marty McCallum. Brilliant.
Well, yeah, we're enjoying it. We've done 567.
How many we've done done? We've done six, yeah.
Do what I'd love you. Can I pitch an idea?
Yeah, I would love used to get like this is just coming to me.
You're like all the scripts that you have or like if you have
something really all from when you started and like read some
of it out, I'd love to hear that do.
You know what? We were genuinely.
Here we go. Bill McGarry 1.
Here we go. We did this in Stormont Ones for
charity. We who was.
You don't do a lot for charity. What you.
Don't do a lot for charity. Major.
Do a lot for charity. I don't.
Talk about his neck protracted a big hearted.
Guy, you know, I don't want anything for OBE and the No, we
did it. We we read a couple of episodes
of Give me Headpiece and went real fact.
That's a good idea for the podcast live.
We could do it live, get some of the actors and read some of the
yeah. So I just.
Said what I just. Said that's what I just said.
That would be yeah, we could do an.
We have the idea first. He's going to pitch himself to
be, he's going to pitch. No, he's going to be an episode
that never aired. You could exclusively do it all
you. There were bits that didn't
nerve that we. Yeah, there you go.
Yeah. Get them out.
Willie T, your turn next year aren't.
You I'm turn this year and like two months.
Yeah, really. Yeah, your best mate doesn't.
Know that he doesn't know that God.
Doesn't even know he's. Just being a wee bastard.
He doesn't know that. He doesn't know that during the
waterfront on the 13th of. December.
Well, I know that I know. That.
But I thought the tour the more the UK dates and top 4 next.
Year, there's UK dates next year, but the Northern Ireland
this year, yeah. Yeah, but some of your tours
next year. Three dates.
Not her, three dates. Man, Man.
No. Glasgow, Liverpool, Edinburgh.
21st, 22nd, 23rd of March. Nice.
Come see me. Did you get Tim?
Were you, did you, did you ever do much in like Dublin or
anything like that? Because surely the show was big.
It was big in Dublin, it was massive in Dublin at one stage
and they still get recognised down South quite a bit.
But no, we didn't really with the latest give me a piece to
it. We were in Monaghan and letter
Kenny and stuff. So we do cross the border a bit.
But again, down South, you know, they're they're a bit
partitionist. You know, they kind of there is
a different culture down there and they kind of go.
Don't get started on it, I don't.
Like them either time, don't worry.
I'm staying neutral, bitch. Back outside.
I'm staying neutral. Publicly, I am.
She and TUV talk. Yeah, she and TUV have no stall.
There we go. And stop funding casement, Todd.
I know, I know, obviously with the long short of it, like you
know, you're so into Irish history, but I had a debate on a
podcast I didn't Liverpool yesterday who would have won a
fight, Genghis Khan or Alexander the Grid.
That's that's a serious debate. You Hun, are.
You sure saying the people he's having it with?
The word. The word.
On hot water. Screen like different times of
battle and stuff like that, yeah.
Where is it a casement? It's.
A casement, I'm saying who was the Who's the more impressive?
Figure early, yeah. Alexander the Great, He was only
30 something when he died, and he conquered, Yeah.
How did I will? Shot in the head and I can't.
Genghis can't live way longer and built such a massive empire.
Wait, don't no get no, I can't remember how Alexander the Great
day. I don't actually know, Don how
did Alexander the Great day? I think.
Tim thinks Dan's Alexa. Have you heard of a thing called
Google? Some sort of illness, maybe
poisoning or assassination? Yeah, he didn't battle, that's
what I'm saying. He never lost the battle as far
as I'm aware. I don't know a lot about him, I
read Genghis. Khan is your favourite just
historical figure to talk about Genghis Khan?
Is it Genghis Khan? Or who was into for a while.
Manson, Musha, The. Guy who gave away the gold.
Give away all gold. He reads one book on someone in
that. And by the way, if you catch me
on that week, I can talk at length about the person and then
it's gone. It's like learning GCSE French.
It's. Gone.
No Irish history? You don't know any Irish
history. You did?
Yeah, You did. A history.
Irish history, yeah. I know I would.
I know more about like, legends and myths, right than actual
history, right? Like as in like from Mccool and
Kukulin, all that kind of stuff. Do you know when the Brits
invaded Ireland? I like that.
Yeah, 1940. Yeah, I've seen the one the
shakes of barley. Oh, what a great by the way.
All all you need to know. Phenomenal film, yeah.
It's great. I bought, I was talking to my
wife's Granda, but that a good few years ago and I talked about
that film. Have you ever seen that?
Yeah, yeah. He's like, I've never seen it.
And I went, you should, yeah. Kelly Murphy's in it was like an
unbelievable film. And he's like, I'd love to see
that. And I ordered them.
I went on Amazon that Prime next day, ordered them the DVD to get
delivered to their house. And by chance it was Saint
Patrick's Day the next day, just by chance.
And when they got it, they phoned my father-in-law and they
were like, it's amazing. We were talking about that
yesterday, that film, and it's arrived at our house and they
came to the conclusion that the Irish government, to Marks and
Patrick's Day, had sent everyone who lives in Ireland a DVD copy
of The Win the Shakes of Barley. And I was like, I sent it.
And everyone was like, OK, I was like, it's more believable than
I sent it. Yeah, no.
That the other day. Yeah, we love that film.
You'd phenomenal that film. I love them chicks.
That's great. Right.
Really, really. More film.
Wow, she and Todd and Willie Thompson, Yeah, support the
wrath. We support good film making.
Yeah, because there's no product.
We don't have a good film. But don't, I'm not in your club.
Have a good. I didn't know.
I didn't say you're. Not in your product club.
Have a good film, Titanic. We we did.
We did. Built the Titanic.
Yes, yeah. No, you just took over a post
office. Well, someone didn't get their
ladders till Thursday. I'm never playing the West.
Again, oh, the welfare. But be careful.
We don't get on with people. Let's draw a line.
Can will you join? Will you come for lunch with us
or are you going to? Pace around, I have stuff to do
if I have a first gig. Thank you very much.
Yeah, but not till like it. I mean, he's the pace around the
room getting. Ready.
We're probably taking him for a happy new year.
It's weirder if that makes you want to go.
We coming? Nice schedule, no?
Well, I'll let me go for 5-10. Well, I have to pace up and
down, but now I need to go away and think of some news jokes for
the next time. I think they've been done.
No, no, no, they've been more. There's a there's a field to be
played there. Oh, I guess I'm doing it.
I'll lean forward. No, Don edit all that out my
nose. My nose used to be OK, but it
got broke. So I think that's what draws
your eyes, not the. You never told me, but I know.
How did you break your nose? I was playing football and a guy
went to head the ball and I also went to head the ball and he
didn't look and I had a backwards as I was coming in
broken nose and then the reset it. 5 yards away from him.
He wasn't. He was a subway to come up.
Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us on this week's
team with me. Go see the wonderful Tim McGarry
on tour tickets for Shane's SSE show, out tickets for my tour as
well, or out go see us All tickets links at the bottom.
Yep, subscribe to the team with me Patreon as well, thank you
very much. And goodbye, yes or no.