1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:02,960 I'm Michael. Che and I'm Colin Jose, and 2 00:00:02,960 --> 00:00:05,280 we've got a little secret. Actually, it's a pretty big 3 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:06,480 secret. Well, now you got to give the 4 00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:08,360 people something. I'm not saying a word. 5 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:09,920 Oh, then people will know to tune in. 6 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:12,080 Come on, tell them a little. Like how we're hosting of comedy 7 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:14,640 events streaming only on Peacock, exactly how it's called 8 00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,200 New York After Dark and it's a comedy show that only features 9 00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:18,960 drop in comic. Boom, you nail. 10 00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:20,360 Into Michael Chase phone numbers. 11 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:21,960 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, hey. 12 00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:25,720 New York After Dark. It's some kind of comedy thing, 13 00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:28,000 and it's streaming now only on Peacock. 14 00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:41,080 You love it. Zippers, welcome to this episode 15 00:00:41,080 --> 00:00:44,520 of the Tea With Me podcast. It's your boy, she and Todd. 16 00:00:45,160 --> 00:00:48,840 Guys, couple things I hate right off the bat #1 global poverty #2 17 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:51,760 when the top of my hair goes over my ears. 18 00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:53,760 And if you're watching the video version, you can see that that's 19 00:00:53,760 --> 00:00:55,120 happening. And I hate that. 20 00:00:55,120 --> 00:00:58,560 And also, but I'm thinking about bringing curtains back as a look 21 00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:00,680 what's going to happen over the next couple of weeks. 22 00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:04,400 Hair wise for me, nobody knows. But one thing is for sure, the 23 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:06,880 sun is out today. It's a good day outside. 24 00:01:06,880 --> 00:01:09,040 Even though I'm wearing a very heavy fleece inside. 25 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:11,760 That's just because I went outside to do a bit of editing 26 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:13,800 and I didn't know what the temperature was. 27 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:16,040 And I put the fleece on thinking I'll warm up and then I'll take 28 00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:17,480 it off. But it wasn't actually outside 29 00:01:17,480 --> 00:01:18,840 for that long because then it came in. 30 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:21,280 You didn't need to know that. But what you do need to know is 31 00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:26,120 today my guest is none other than Mr Colin Geddis, stand up 32 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:33,280 video maker man, you know, he he really, really is Colin, I had a 33 00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:38,080 great chat, talked about tea, we talked about spice, talked about 34 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:41,920 comedy, everything in between. I think you're really going to 35 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:46,880 enjoy that. Colin's kind of like the OG of 36 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:51,400 Northern Irish podcasts. You know, OGOJ is kind of like 37 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:56,880 the OJ, like the OJ Simpson in a way of, of local podcasts, you 38 00:01:56,880 --> 00:02:00,280 know, and then, and he sat down, had a, had a great chat with me, 39 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:02,720 which I, I really enjoyed because like catching up with 40 00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:05,600 mates, you know, normally we'd be doing gigs together. 41 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:09,199 We, we maybe have something to eat or, or whatever. 42 00:02:09,199 --> 00:02:11,920 And it's difficult, you know, and, and it was halfway through 43 00:02:11,920 --> 00:02:14,560 this podcast, I was like, this is, it's like hanging out with 44 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:17,920 your mates again, you know, but then I really enjoyed the chat. 45 00:02:17,920 --> 00:02:20,760 I think you guys are too. I'm not going to do a long intro 46 00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:23,040 for this because I think we talked for a good amount of time 47 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:25,600 and look, we probably could have done a 10 hour podcast because 48 00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:29,240 it's just great to catch up. This is the Tea with me podcast 49 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:30,360 with Colin. Get us. 50 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:42,560 Do you remember we ran a comedy club in the Odyssey for one week 51 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:45,840 because and we thought it was going to be class and I started 52 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:48,520 freaking out walking around and like touching an earpiece and 53 00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:51,280 going, guys, we need to be live here in 40 seconds. 54 00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:55,200 I think we thought we were running it and there was like a 55 00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:58,800 network of like some of Ireland's biggest moguls running 56 00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:01,400 it and we were running around getting paid about 8 LB. 57 00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:03,920 Going I'm a businessman. Now what? 58 00:03:03,920 --> 00:03:06,280 About the guy who just kept going, oh man, I just did a 59 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:08,320 waterfall there. Why? 60 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:15,200 Why about the kit you'd have to carry about to do a waterfall 61 00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:17,360 and like the Odyssey? Toilets. 62 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:20,000 He's a proper businessman. He's like guys, go to look at 63 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,240 the overheads and projections here. 64 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:24,920 But hold on, let me do a long. Just the scummiest drugs. 65 00:03:25,240 --> 00:03:27,960 Anyway, we'll talk about next year's projection, but here, 66 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:33,440 listen, I just smoked hash from a phantom Cam, so bear with me 67 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:35,040 to get the vision back on my left eye here. 68 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,120 I'm just nipping the fresh garbage here. 69 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:41,440 I just smoked spice. Who wants a burger? 70 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaking of spice, who's hungry? Oh. 71 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:51,520 Fuck, I'm sweating. Oh, there were good times. 72 00:03:51,520 --> 00:03:55,200 I remember when do you remember when I when you just started 73 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:58,560 doing stand up and I said listeners just barn Hollywood. 74 00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:00,960 Why don't we do like an I'm fighter comedy night and you 75 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:03,080 said yes, let's do it. It was me you. 76 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:06,200 In fact, that wasn't even on it was you Mickey Sean and somebody 77 00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:09,240 Paddy Mcgackie maybe yeah, and just how much you don't know 78 00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:11,000 about business back then probably still don't. 79 00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:14,600 I charged in the guy go. It was that same guy goes how 80 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:17,680 much do you want to charge here And I was just grateful they 81 00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:21,320 were letting us do it. So and what if it was £2 and 82 00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:24,960 I'll take a quid from every two and he goes yeah 100%. 83 00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:30,960 It was £12 out of the door. Do you remember? 84 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:33,960 That was a total shit show. Like he goes there's there's so 85 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,360 many people in, but we'll get screens up in the smoking area 86 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:38,760 so they can watch the comedy. No, it's just a meet and greet. 87 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:40,320 Well, it's not like nobody give a fuck. 88 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:44,640 Yeah, I think especially with me, there was no point in me 89 00:04:44,640 --> 00:04:48,920 even trying to do stand up for like another six years probably. 90 00:04:49,280 --> 00:04:50,960 What did you do? Just just sort of start? 91 00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:52,880 I mean, nobody was. Nobody really listened. 92 00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:56,280 The only time anyone listened anyone was when Sean went on and 93 00:04:56,280 --> 00:04:58,640 just sang The Fresh Prince of theme tune and then left. 94 00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:02,120 And like, I remember the time I'd done so little comedy that I 95 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:04,760 was like, man, he's got some tricks. 96 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:09,120 Yeah, my dad still, my dad goes. So yeah, he should have tapped 97 00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:10,240 into that. There was like, what? 98 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:13,920 I'm coming MC. He could have took, if that's an 99 00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:15,720 original song, he could have taken that. 100 00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:18,600 I don't even know where, where Beller is. 101 00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:19,720 Like what? You know, he could have been 102 00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:21,520 everywhere. Where is that Logan? 103 00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:22,800 He's from Logan. Is he? 104 00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:27,440 Up. There we did some, we did some 105 00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:29,440 shit. When people say what's the worst 106 00:05:29,440 --> 00:05:33,560 gig you ever done is yours Also the gig we did together in Derry 107 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:37,960 Mccash. Yeah, that was up there like and 108 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:42,800 I remember it, you know, it sounds like it sounds like diva 109 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:45,640 behaviour, but I literally in the middle of a sentence went 110 00:05:45,920 --> 00:05:47,880 can any is anyone listening at all? 111 00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:51,320 And if there was, nobody even turned like to look at me to be 112 00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:52,160 like. What's he said? 113 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:55,360 They just kept talking and it was like such a wall of noise 114 00:05:55,960 --> 00:06:00,280 and then I just was like, I just sat the mic down and just I was 115 00:06:00,280 --> 00:06:03,720 tested it, but I just slowly walked off the stage and then we 116 00:06:03,720 --> 00:06:06,800 were off and then I don't know who was driving, but there was 117 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:08,280 like. A thing was me. 118 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:11,400 There was a full. Blown riot in the in the car 119 00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:13,840 park and the cars are just slowly moving through crowds of 120 00:06:13,840 --> 00:06:15,640 people fucking digging ahead of each other. 121 00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:19,440 Yeah, but with a bonnet. What's mad is we all get about 122 00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:23,360 3-4 minutes each. They they all paid in. 123 00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:26,320 It was like packed out and the people that were there had like 124 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:27,400 the best night they already made. 125 00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:31,720 That was unreal. It's like fine, but yeah, I 126 00:06:31,720 --> 00:06:34,000 think I was driving and we were parked outside waiting on Sean 127 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:37,400 to go and get us the money from the go and get us our six quids. 128 00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:40,760 And and then there was a full riot in the car park. 129 00:06:40,920 --> 00:06:43,000 And I just had to like, as I was waiting for him, just really 130 00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:46,720 politely, like manoeuvre around the fight because it was moving 131 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:49,680 slowly and we had to just keep, excuse me, excuse me, maybe 132 00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:51,600 Corsa. You're literally like nudging 133 00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:54,280 people on the arse to get them out of the way while they were 134 00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:55,680 like throwing digs all over the place. 135 00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:58,520 Yeah, fuck, that was that was rough. 136 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,720 What else stands out as a real bad one? 137 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:07,480 We did. Together, yeah, there was a lot 138 00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:12,600 of fucking Portrush Playhouse ones where like, like if we'd 139 00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:16,400 have turned up the night before, the crowd numbers and reaction 140 00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:18,560 would have been the same. Yeah, you know what I mean. 141 00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:21,040 Like. You, it looked like a like a 142 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:23,800 cinema and I've had as many seats as a fucking cinema. 143 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:28,520 But then they would let in like 6 people because nobody, nobody 144 00:07:28,520 --> 00:07:31,320 went out in that venue, which we didn't know you're, you know, 145 00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:33,400 we're not from Port Rush Play but or not. 146 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:37,160 But yeah, they would just, no, nobody went to that venue. 147 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:41,800 Because I remember doing gigs after that down the street in 148 00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:44,200 that Atlantic Lounge or whatever, the retro or whatever. 149 00:07:44,200 --> 00:07:46,800 It's called. And I was packed twice, so I 150 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:48,520 think it was just like we picked the wrong. 151 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:51,560 The wrong place you like because I did. 152 00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:53,920 I did the bar in there about two months ago. 153 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:55,680 It was class. Yeah, Kiwi. 154 00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:59,760 It's got Kiwis now. The Playhouse yeah yeah, yeah 155 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:02,640 but it was I think it wasn't like there was 1 standout bad 156 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:06,520 gig it was just like the stupidity of turning up month 157 00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:09,760 after month yeah getting the whole way there and being like 158 00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:12,400 anyone in this week and. Why is this not different? 159 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:15,840 Yeah, trust me guys, this is going to be the week. 160 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:17,000 It's. Kind of the week. 161 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:19,840 I would do it up the back guys. I think. 162 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:22,280 I think there's one picture of me doing stand about it with 163 00:08:22,280 --> 00:08:25,400 like, are we such alone? Because I must have thought it 164 00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:27,680 wasn't going ahead and at the last minute as we were leaving 165 00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:29,640 someone like no, we're we have enough to do it. 166 00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:33,600 I think I just have a backpack on the one just doing doing a 167 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,120 set. Yeah, there's some there was 168 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:36,200 some bad ones. Let me ask you this. 169 00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,000 I normally ask this is my first question, but let. 170 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,480 Me ask you this. Let me ask you this very 171 00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:41,600 quickly. Have you finally run out of 172 00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:48,800 celebrities to talk to? Nah, now I'm waiting for Jamie 173 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:54,480 Thixon. Oh. 174 00:08:54,760 --> 00:08:57,200 Fuck, I've got a big. Case from the office. 175 00:08:57,240 --> 00:08:58,160 Remember. Him. 176 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:01,080 Who's that guy from Blue Peter Liso? 177 00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:08,120 The black, the news reader, He was the fucking shit mom. 178 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:12,480 He was the yeah, here's a beast. I've got Lisa, Lorraine, Kelly 179 00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:15,320 and Dane bars coming. On next week. 180 00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:18,480 Ding, Ding, Ding. I mean, I'll be a decent pod. 181 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,280 I would definitely. Be I'm nearly sure I because I 182 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:23,240 never went to a hairdressers when I was younger because my 183 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,720 mom cut her. And I said. 184 00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:32,160 You're always bald. Pretty much, but I could 185 00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:35,360 remember having a picture of the bars in a magazine because I 186 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:40,800 want my hair cut like that. Do you know when? 187 00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:43,920 People take in photos of fucking Rachel from friends. 188 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:49,640 Yeah, yeah, yeah, females. Your hair looks like Claire 189 00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:58,560 Balding's at the minute. I, I, I look at it and think 190 00:09:58,560 --> 00:10:04,880 it's like DiCaprio and Titanic. And it is, but only if that if 191 00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:11,400 they pull them out after a time. Oh fuck sake, that's. 192 00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:15,800 What I took in a picture of the Cambrian when he's just lying on 193 00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:21,080 that thing in the water, just. Fucking kid when's it loud with 194 00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:23,920 her tits out like and you're like. 195 00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:26,640 Can you do that? My Neo just stuck. 196 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:30,080 Yeah. I don't know what to do. 197 00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:32,320 I think I'm just going to keep keep growing it. 198 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:34,760 I like it. But I just. 199 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,160 Shaved it, you know, that's, that's the move now, people just 200 00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:40,840 shaving their head. Yeah, yeah, I normally ask 201 00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:43,160 people do the drink, do the drink tea. 202 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:47,160 I here's the thing, you I don't think you can be tied down to 1 203 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:49,520 drink. Like anytime we've gone to have 204 00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:52,520 tea or coffee, you're very like, I'll just get one drink. 205 00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:56,080 I'll just get a tea or a coffee. And you'll, I feel like you go 206 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:57,720 up to the counter quite a lot of times. 207 00:10:57,720 --> 00:11:00,480 Like you'll maybe start with AT and then go hold on, let me have 208 00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:03,640 latte here as well. And then you get a latte and a 209 00:11:03,640 --> 00:11:07,120 sparkling water and then just other drink like you'll, you'll, 210 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:08,800 you'll accrue a lot of drinks. What are you? 211 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:13,000 What are you drinking right now? Yeah, big beverage guy at the 212 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,600 minute. I know it's fucking tea with me 213 00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:17,000 and all that shit, but I have a full pot of coffee there which 214 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:20,840 I'll probably RIP RIP through. But that also big beverage guy, 215 00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:27,440 worst Marvel superhero them all. Fucking cars flying through 216 00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:29,240 there and all these like is anyone thirsty? 217 00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:37,160 Opens his coat big flask cans of Sprite yeah Andre I had AI had a 218 00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:40,640 podcast of my own a couple of weeks ago and the title of the 219 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:43,040 podcast was Coffee slut because. People. 220 00:11:43,040 --> 00:11:45,920 Get real fucking, you know, picky about like exactly what 221 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:48,480 coffee they have. Like I only drink black coffee, 222 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:51,520 but I'll I'll drink mine changes daily. 223 00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:56,480 I'll be like I fucking Americano espresso, like it changes all 224 00:11:56,480 --> 00:12:00,280 the time and like tea. I'll I don't really drink tea 225 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:05,520 that much, but I I always think of it as like a like in a 226 00:12:05,520 --> 00:12:07,680 compliment to food. Tea. 227 00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:10,120 Yeah, I. Like I would have, I would have 228 00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:14,360 tea with like a breakfast. There's like I would never just 229 00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:16,920 be like IA cup of cup. I could have a cup of coffee and 230 00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:19,840 just have a cup of coffee. I do it 16 times a day. 231 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:24,120 But tea would never be like, oh, just made myself a wee tea and 232 00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:25,800 just sip away. I feel like there has to be 233 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:26,840 something else with it. Hold on. 234 00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:29,000 I'm in something that's up all the time. 235 00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:32,880 But I never say like, I never get like excited about it, you 236 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:34,800 know? It's just, it's just a thing. 237 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:38,120 But I definitely like they see me coming with coffee. 238 00:12:38,120 --> 00:12:40,400 You know, I'm I'm quite new to drinking coffee. 239 00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:43,400 You'd see the pods, you know, you can get like ween espresso 240 00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:48,040 pods, say it's like £2 for a wee box, but for £3 they put like a 241 00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:52,080 an exotic country on it, like Columbus popping. 242 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:54,240 You get that gets me because I I don't know the difference 243 00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:56,360 between ATS, but I will pay an extra quid and go. 244 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:59,680 But these these are from Congo. You know, I I don't understand 245 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:03,000 the difference yet, but. I mean, it's a, you could be 246 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:06,440 like, it's like craft beer or something, you know, people get 247 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:08,200 really fucking up their hole about it. 248 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:12,760 And do you remember that old Dilla Morton bit where he's like 249 00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:14,440 about wine? He goes, you either sip it and 250 00:13:14,840 --> 00:13:16,880 go, or you sip it and you go, oh, that's actually all right. 251 00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:19,040 Yeah, yeah. That's, that's coffee. 252 00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:23,320 It can be like, I've had coffee like, oh, this is a fucking, you 253 00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:26,520 know, blonde roast such and such, and the caffeine's higher 254 00:13:26,520 --> 00:13:28,240 and you and you drink it and you're like, that's fucking 255 00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:29,520 disgusting. Yeah. 256 00:13:29,760 --> 00:13:33,160 And then you'll just get like some shitty instant coffee and 257 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:35,520 you're like, that's actually not bad. 258 00:13:36,080 --> 00:13:39,040 Big batsman here guitars on the wall. 259 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:41,000 Are you are you playing more? Are you playing more guitar? 260 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:47,600 Because I think whenever I was when I was at your when I when I 261 00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:50,960 was at your parents house used to have in the original Island 262 00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:54,240 fighter garage used to have a guitar and sort of is that the 263 00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:57,320 white one? Yeah and just and just play the 264 00:13:57,320 --> 00:13:59,520 odd like you know you're sort of like you'd be into it sometimes 265 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:03,640 and then not but have you got like way more into it or you 266 00:14:03,640 --> 00:14:05,960 just like coming the guitars up? No, I've. 267 00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,840 Done playing them like. I just like. 268 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:12,720 I'm the same old guitars the way I'm like with anything else. 269 00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:16,520 If I actually fucking put my mind to it, I'll probably be all 270 00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:18,680 right. So I mean, yeah, yeah. 271 00:14:18,680 --> 00:14:19,120 Yeah. No, no. 272 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:20,880 You mean no? Like at the minute I'm like, 273 00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:23,440 like, say if you were a footballer, you're like a guy 274 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:26,480 who's just really good at like keeping up some tricks, but you 275 00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:29,640 haven't played a game in years. Yeah. 276 00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:33,680 But that's what. It's like packed in the. 277 00:14:33,680 --> 00:14:37,000 Maradona 7 Yeah, I should. Actually, you know, like the the 278 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:40,640 dexterity and the fucking all that's decent, but I just don't 279 00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:43,240 know any theory which I should I should learn like probably. 280 00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,480 I went to guitar. You probably knew me at this 281 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:47,240 time. I went to guitar lessons twice 282 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:49,680 in Hollywood. And the guy who was a Scottish 283 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:50,960 fellow teaching me, Ronan Keaton. 284 00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:55,440 When you say nothing at all. And I lost the head left and I'm 285 00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:57,520 never going to be able to play this Kevin just. 286 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:00,480 'Cause I could, I could do the singing. 287 00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:02,760 But I just couldn't play. See Making. 288 00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:06,920 You sing at the same time, yeah. This guy just. 289 00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:08,080 Trying to fuck you like you know. 290 00:15:08,760 --> 00:15:12,680 Can you sing this to me? Because I couldn't, I, I could 291 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:16,320 do, I could do a chord spot on, but it took me about 10 minutes 292 00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:19,360 to get my fingers round and I, which is weird considering the 293 00:15:19,360 --> 00:15:22,360 length of my fingers, but I couldn't get round to the next 294 00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:24,880 chord in time, You know, I mean, like they'll be still like 295 00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:27,160 they'll be too long in between. Like sometimes it's fine play a 296 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:29,040 chord and then leave a wee bit of atmosphere. 297 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,400 But it was just, it was just too long. 298 00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:35,320 It looks amazing. But it's like, yeah, like. 299 00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:39,360 How you you need to literally just go between them? 300 00:15:40,720 --> 00:15:42,680 You know, till to the point where you don't look or think 301 00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:44,480 about it. It's just like you can just move 302 00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:48,160 your hands. When when do you think we'll be 303 00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:50,960 doing stand up? Because I've. 304 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:56,000 I've There's so many different theories, opinions out there I 305 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:59,480 think. You will be able to do some sort 306 00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:04,720 of, well, I mean, literally, I was, I was talking to our shared 307 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:07,800 promoters about fucking outdoor gigs. 308 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:10,240 Yeah. Same which might. 309 00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:12,880 Be I would do it. I would do it in this time just 310 00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:14,600 for like the vlog, you know what I mean? 311 00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:18,000 Just as a moment to be like, do you remember how crazy that was? 312 00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:25,000 But I'd say there'd be like fees and gigs, probably in the 313 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,640 summer. Yes, they'll be. 314 00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:29,720 It might be. Weird like but. 315 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:32,880 Yeah, reduced capacity kind of thing and I don't. 316 00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:37,840 Think Turin and big, big gigs will be, you know, probably 317 00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:41,240 fucking early middle next year probably I'd say. 318 00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:44,960 Yeah. Like it was so like, did you 319 00:16:44,960 --> 00:16:46,200 have to? Do you have to cancel any? 320 00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:48,880 Live stand up or you just kind of finished doing shows. 321 00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:51,040 It might have been the right time, yeah. 322 00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:53,400 It was, it was actually perfect for me because I got all the 323 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:59,440 shit done, the two big shows and then wasn't really doing 324 00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:01,440 anything anyway, just doing the odd libraries. 325 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,560 And then the lockdown came and I only had to cancel 1 live 326 00:17:04,560 --> 00:17:07,280 podcast which was supposed to go ahead but. 327 00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:12,079 Yeah, like. Obviously we're talking about 328 00:17:12,079 --> 00:17:15,119 like booking more SSE shows, but it's going to be October next 329 00:17:15,119 --> 00:17:17,800 year. Like, yeah, because, you know, 330 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:20,400 say everything just fucking. You got the green light in like 331 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:24,160 a month. None of us have done stand up. 332 00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:25,960 Oh. Yeah, do you know what I mean? 333 00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:29,400 So it's like, you can't be like, come see me at the SSE. 334 00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:33,280 It's the same. Set as last time and then I'll 335 00:17:33,280 --> 00:17:35,600 just throw in a bit of Corona jokes. 336 00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:40,680 Do something real like at the start, just something really 337 00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:43,880 like some sort of lockdown joke or whatever and then just 338 00:17:43,880 --> 00:17:46,440 straight into the said, I think the. 339 00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:49,000 Big. Thing is, he's going to be not 340 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:53,280 doing any coronavirus material when this is because whatever 341 00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:56,520 joke I think you can think of, unless it's like a a personal 342 00:17:56,520 --> 00:18:00,480 experience story, whatever joke or material you can think of, I 343 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,800 just have a feeling that I'll be just about to go on stage and 344 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,720 whoever's on before will do the joke and I'll go. 345 00:18:05,760 --> 00:18:09,160 Yeah. Oh. 346 00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:11,360 Shit. It's gonna be. 347 00:18:12,120 --> 00:18:13,120 Hold on there, change it. There we go. 348 00:18:13,120 --> 00:18:16,200 It's gonna be. Yeah. 349 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:18,240 You're gonna really have to bring the fucking fire. 350 00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:20,360 Like if you've got Corona stuff, Yeah. 351 00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:24,000 Or. You know, it might be like this 352 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:27,600 is your experience during lockdown type thing. 353 00:18:27,600 --> 00:18:30,560 If I was going to do it, I would definitely go down the racist 354 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:33,240 route of of picking on the Chinese. 355 00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:38,160 But yeah. Or or your normal set as it's 356 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:40,400 known. I actually. 357 00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:42,480 I had. A. 358 00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:45,760 Fucking joke there before the lockdown, just when coronavirus 359 00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:50,640 was starting to kick about and I, it was like so rough, but it 360 00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:52,800 was like it was all true. But it was like that. 361 00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:54,680 If I could have done that a couple more times, I feel like 362 00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:57,920 it could have been a really fucking good bit about like 363 00:18:59,120 --> 00:19:02,400 about what, why, why, why do like a lot of Asian countries 364 00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:06,840 eat the weirdest ship just because they think it's going to 365 00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:08,840 give them a fucking boner. You know what I mean? 366 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,680 Everything they, you know, you ever watch those travel shows? 367 00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:15,880 The guy's eating like a shark bollock and he's like, oh, it 368 00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:17,720 points at his Dick and he's like. 369 00:19:19,120 --> 00:19:20,840 And. You know, fucking Andy 370 00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:22,520 Bourdain's like, oh, I think he's trying to say it makes you 371 00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:24,920 fucking fertile, gives you a route that there's a lot of 372 00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:27,560 stuff they eat. And then my joke was there's 373 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:31,720 about fucking 3 billion of them. Like I think they're, I think 374 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:35,040 they're fertile enough. And then the joke was they were 375 00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:38,000 so fertile, you know, a couple of decades ago that they 376 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:39,560 literally were drowning their own daughters. 377 00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:43,320 Now that's absolutely, that's absolutely true. 378 00:19:44,360 --> 00:19:50,000 But everyone goes oh. How much do you miss that noise 379 00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:53,360 of crowds? Oh, and just someone going Oh my 380 00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:56,040 fuck. I don't like it because I know 381 00:19:56,360 --> 00:19:59,200 that they don't care. It's like a a panto. 382 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:00,120 Type. It's like a. 383 00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:04,000 Virtue signal, as they as they say now, like that's them going. 384 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:05,920 I can't not make that this noise. 385 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:10,840 I have to if I've got a laugh, I have to, you know, make that 386 00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:12,400 noise first. There's actually. 387 00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:17,720 Around the corner from me in Balnahinch, there's a Chinese 388 00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:21,560 medicine like practitioner guy, you know, does like alternative 389 00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:24,600 type type things. And I don't know, I think it's 390 00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:26,160 kind of all right. Like I went to him for Crohn's 391 00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:31,560 disease and he just gave me spice is. 392 00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:33,720 He is he Chinese? Well. 393 00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:40,360 No, not really. Is it like you go in with a 394 00:20:40,360 --> 00:20:42,120 store back and you leave with a Curry half and half? 395 00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:45,560 Everything. They recommend. 396 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:54,880 Listen man, it looks like arthritis, but if he takes some 397 00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:57,640 satay King prawns might be it might heal up. 398 00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:05,840 Coleman chow Mein AIDS is. It of an ice. 399 00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:10,280 Cream roll. Here for AIDS starts going. 400 00:21:10,280 --> 00:21:11,400 Through the fridge. Where is it? 401 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:14,200 While we're on. Racist rants. 402 00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:16,240 Why didn't why do more Chinese restaurants here not take 403 00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:20,000 contact list? But anyway, yeah, none of them 404 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,040 do. None of them take it. 405 00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:25,040 I yeah, I don't know. I think if I was doing a gig 406 00:21:25,040 --> 00:21:28,040 tonight, you would you would be rusty. 407 00:21:28,200 --> 00:21:31,440 But because it'd be such a novelty to do it again, I think 408 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:34,320 you'd be on form, you know, like, I think the, the nerves 409 00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:36,240 would be there. But then the second or third 410 00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:38,400 time you did it, I'd say that's when you'd start to notice. 411 00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:40,720 Like, no I'm not. It's a. 412 00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:42,280 Material too, like I want to be doing. 413 00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:48,640 I've written 15 minutes and new stuff since all this so I feel 414 00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:50,400 like I've always doing stand up tonight. 415 00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:53,160 Because. It because it would be so new I 416 00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:55,760 could get away with it, but you still need to like try that 417 00:21:55,760 --> 00:21:58,960 material obviously. And I know I wasn't I don't know 418 00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:01,360 about you, but I wasn't doing any writing at the start of this 419 00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:04,600 for about a month and a half. Just couldn't, couldn't write 420 00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:06,920 stand up just because I couldn't pitch like. 421 00:22:07,320 --> 00:22:08,680 The. Excitement of writing Stand up 422 00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:12,080 for me is say I'm writing it on a Tuesday afternoon. 423 00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:14,480 I can then message you and be like here, can I do libraries 424 00:22:14,480 --> 00:22:16,800 tomorrow and try this or pops on Thursday. 425 00:22:17,200 --> 00:22:19,800 But when you've nowhere to do it, the incentive sort of goes 426 00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:21,400 away a bit. It's just. 427 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,600 It's just like having a purpose. It's like. 428 00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:27,400 Yeah, you got. To be you got to be fucking 429 00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:30,280 doing it with with a bit of light at the end of the tunnel. 430 00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:32,280 Like this is what what I'm doing for type thing. 431 00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:37,000 Luckily. For me, you know, I very rarely 432 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:40,160 sit down and just like I'm going to write now unless, unless it's 433 00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:45,560 for a video, but you know, I've just been throwing some things 434 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:47,280 in my phone, like different stuff. 435 00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:51,480 And there, there are things that I know when I, when I go to 436 00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:53,840 write about them, there'll be like a lot of stuff in there. 437 00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:57,240 Yeah, because I was going. To call next year's big shows 438 00:22:57,440 --> 00:23:04,000 unbelievable, which was kind of because I said a lot on podcasts 439 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:06,360 when I fucking listen back, I'm like, that's, that's like a like 440 00:23:06,360 --> 00:23:10,560 a tech. But then just if you were to 441 00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:14,400 fucking tell people this the story of what I've been through 442 00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:19,160 in the last year and then throw in like this fucking pandemic in 443 00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:22,080 the mix of it, it is kind of fucking, I just thought it would 444 00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:23,360 be a good name, like unbelievable. 445 00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:28,400 So there's stuff there's like a lot of sort of like weird shit 446 00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:29,440 in there that I could write about. 447 00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:32,200 Yeah, that's good. That's good as well because it's 448 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:35,720 not really tying you to a specific thing. 449 00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:38,680 You're just talking about the fact that so much has gone on 450 00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:43,800 your life in the last year. It's not like it has a it's not 451 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:46,880 like it has a theme that boxes in too much because I think I've 452 00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:49,280 done that before where I've like come up with a title for a show 453 00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:52,400 or a theme of a show and then two months out gone. 454 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:56,360 I this show in no way like it's going to be shit that I just 455 00:23:56,360 --> 00:23:58,200 make it about this. So I just started making them 456 00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:01,280 way more loose. Yeah, like like I wrote that the 457 00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:04,640 two shows ago. It was the Todd father about it 458 00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:06,160 was a whole show about the tattoo. 459 00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,520 I didn't. I didn't talk about that at any 460 00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:10,240 point of the show. I know. 461 00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:13,240 It's like, I know Dave had the dad show, Yeah. 462 00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:19,800 And it's fucking. It's so hard not to like as soon 463 00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:22,000 as you have a kid talk about it loads. 464 00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:24,560 Well, I'm thinking that at the minute, I'm like, it's all my 465 00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:27,560 material going to be that. Is it going to be similar to any 466 00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:31,640 material that any of you, Dave, any of my mates have just come 467 00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:32,880 to us? Like are we going to have kind 468 00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:36,520 of the same material or I, I don't know. 469 00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:40,080 I guess it depends if, if, if something I think if something 470 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:44,160 happens to me in the process of having the baby that I go, oh, 471 00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:48,240 this is beyond mental or this is very me, then I'll do it. 472 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:50,880 But like, yeah. I think I feel like a whole 473 00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:53,000 show. Around, I don't know, yeah. 474 00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:55,280 If it's very you, that's. That's the. 475 00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:58,440 Like whenever. I was talking about when Eddie 476 00:24:58,440 --> 00:25:00,200 was born. Like this ball bag being fucking 477 00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:02,240 enormous. That's very. 478 00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:09,440 Me, yeah. I mean, I don't know, it's weird 479 00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:15,160 because I think because because we're in like in the middle of 480 00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:18,920 pregnancy, in lockdown, there's not the sort of stories you 481 00:25:18,920 --> 00:25:22,160 maybe normally have like life's different. 482 00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:25,280 Like we're not out and about or getting people's reaction. 483 00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:28,880 You know, just like just like being out, say out for a 484 00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:32,480 restaurant and, and she's got the bump or whatever and people 485 00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:34,520 maybe someone's saying something to you or whatever. 486 00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,520 We're not getting any of that. So it's hard to like actually 487 00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:40,080 come up with material for it, but I just. 488 00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:41,240 Chilling. Is she working? 489 00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:42,760 No. Well, from home. 490 00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:45,400 Yeah, from home. It's probably, you know what? 491 00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:48,240 It's probably not the fucking the worst thing. 492 00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:50,160 Yeah, do. You know what I mean? 493 00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:53,440 Like just, you know, I'm like, I know when Maureen was pregnant, 494 00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:55,440 there was a few times like I went to this coffee shop and 495 00:25:55,440 --> 00:25:59,480 this guard was like fucking ready to pop, like still 496 00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:01,560 working. And I was like, you know, you're 497 00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:04,360 looking at you're like, I feel like you shouldn't be working 498 00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:05,640 right now. You think that? 499 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:08,080 That, obviously people have. To like but that pit and. 500 00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:11,000 Curb Your Enthusiasm when the the one really with the big 501 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:13,560 bumps on the treadmill and he's just he's just given her the 502 00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:17,360 look. I don't know, it's it's 503 00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:20,440 obviously weird that we're about to have a baby in lockdown, but 504 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,800 what's it like having a baby in lockdown? 505 00:26:24,640 --> 00:26:28,920 It's fine. I mean, I'm jealous. 506 00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:31,120 You see, when everyone puts things up and they're like, oh 507 00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:33,280 man, I'm so bored and I wish I had something to do. 508 00:26:33,280 --> 00:26:36,640 And I'm like, I used to make, you know, fucking pottery when I 509 00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:38,960 was in school. And I've taken that back up or 510 00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:41,440 they put up a photo and they're like, I cleaned the whole back 511 00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:44,400 patio with a toothbrush. Before and after I. 512 00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:48,720 I, I, I haven't, I haven't experienced that. 513 00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:51,920 I've had more to do, you know, because like, obviously like 514 00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:55,160 yourself, you start doing more Patreon stuff and you end up 515 00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:59,320 doing 3 podcasts a week and that fucking turns over so quickly 516 00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:04,400 and then the baby is like, you know, before you know it, it's 517 00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:09,080 10:00 at night every day. You're just like, what the fuck? 518 00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:12,440 At night now he's like waiting. So not only do you feed him 519 00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:14,800 bottles, but you have to set him down for these like fucking 520 00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:18,000 meals where he just fucking takes food and just mashes it 521 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:22,200 all over his face like father. Like son, yeah, you do that. 522 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:24,720 Like, fuck you. You do that three times a day 523 00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:27,880 plus all the bottles and you're like, all I've done is sit here 524 00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:30,040 like at one point. Sometimes I'll be. 525 00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:34,360 Like I need to see a like a physio from just holding this 526 00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:37,360 fucking baby like this and now he weighs like 8 stone. 527 00:27:37,360 --> 00:27:42,440 You're like fucking dying trying to feel so like yeah, the I mean 528 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:47,880 I have to make appointments to do work, if you know what I 529 00:27:47,880 --> 00:27:49,160 mean. I have to, I have to say to 530 00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:54,400 Maureen like I will not be here in these in these hours or else 531 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:55,760 I'll just fucking not get anything done. 532 00:27:56,120 --> 00:27:58,600 So. Sometimes I wish like already 533 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:00,520 thinking about that kind of thing and having to do that a 534 00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:02,360 bit. I wish we did something like a 535 00:28:02,360 --> 00:28:06,040 bit more like noble because when you're like, listen, I have to 536 00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:07,280 get off here. Why? 537 00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:10,520 I'm I'm doing a podcast with the NC Harriet. 538 00:28:10,520 --> 00:28:15,560 I have to, I have to. It'd be way better if you're, 539 00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:17,520 you know, if you're a doctor or whatever, but. 540 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,440 Listen, Van Morrison. Dropped out from the podcast so 541 00:28:20,440 --> 00:28:27,480 I'm talking to Woodsy. And asking him the same 542 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:29,440 questions. So this. 543 00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:33,080 Second album, Is that what it really picked off you? 544 00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:37,920 What's funny is like at this time of morning, like we're the 545 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,120 only two people who could have done this podcast because no, 546 00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:45,960 let's get up before 4 for sure. I did a podcast where I'm the 547 00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:48,840 other day and I was like, it's like, it's like I had a friend 548 00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:51,360 who died because like I can't contact him. 549 00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:54,680 Like you know what I mean? You'll text them and be like, oh 550 00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:56,040 man, what do you, what do you think of this? 551 00:28:56,080 --> 00:28:58,320 And then attended to fucking 11 at night. 552 00:28:58,320 --> 00:28:59,880 He'd be like, sorry man, just woke up. 553 00:29:02,920 --> 00:29:05,880 I mean, I, I said to you about about going up, sleep down or 554 00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:07,960 the other day I was like, here we should, we should all go up, 555 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:10,400 you know, all the boys. And very quickly you're like, 556 00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:12,160 hey, who? Who would also go? 557 00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,360 Yeah. I know I remember and you know, 558 00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:19,640 in that, in that little comedians group and the I can't 559 00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:24,000 remember what order it was, but like, was it who the fuck was 560 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:25,000 it? Dave? 561 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,920 Maybe put something in and you know the way like you see a 562 00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:32,480 message with no replies for like 10 or 15 minutes and I was like, 563 00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:36,520 it was either Dave or Patty or Casey and I was like, I Dave, 564 00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:39,160 don't worry, I've seen it. I have a child too or something, 565 00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:42,440 you know, like and it was basic. It was basically everyone that 566 00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:45,440 has a kid was already up being like, yeah, yeah, we're all, 567 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:47,400 we've all been up for fucking hours here, yeah. 568 00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:51,760 Yeah, I mean, I, I think that is a silver lining for me in a way 569 00:29:51,760 --> 00:29:54,160 like with all, all the early mornings that are coming because 570 00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:57,240 I get up really early for no real reason. 571 00:29:57,720 --> 00:30:01,240 So I think I think that is going to be easier, but I don't like 572 00:30:01,240 --> 00:30:03,080 people are freaking me out with this six weeks thing. 573 00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:05,000 This seems to be a big thing, the first six weeks. 574 00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:07,440 Let's see, the first six weeks. You've got to get through the 575 00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:09,360 first six weeks. Did you notice that? 576 00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:14,760 Yeah. You see the thing? 577 00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:17,680 Is like you know I would have. I would get. 578 00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:21,320 Up early enough, you know, I, you know, I'd have to be 579 00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:23,640 drinking the fucking five in the morning before I would sleep in 580 00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:29,400 the like 11 or 12 or something. Yeah, but like, which is real 581 00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:35,600 hard to do with a child. But you, you just you think that 582 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:37,720 like I would, I would think like, oh, I stay up late and I 583 00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:41,160 get up early and you know, I'm not that big a fan of sleeping. 584 00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:46,160 But what happens is it's not like you're well rested and well 585 00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:48,480 slept and well fed. And then the beat someone 586 00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:53,080 delivers you the baby. You go from like, oh, this looks 587 00:30:53,080 --> 00:30:54,520 like she's going to have this baby here. 588 00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,120 And then you're awake for fucking 48 hours. 589 00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:59,560 Then you get a baby. And you take. 590 00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:02,080 It home and you're trying to figure this shit out and you're 591 00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:05,640 like absolutely fucking knackered and depend on whether 592 00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:07,680 or not these are breastfeeding or not. 593 00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:15,760 Like if you decide to breastfeed the IT seems sort of harsh, but 594 00:31:15,760 --> 00:31:21,080 the best thing to do is you just don't wake up at night and she 595 00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:23,200 feeds the baby all night and then you take the baby in the 596 00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:27,000 morning and she sleeps because we made the mistake of like I 597 00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:29,160 would get up and be like standing there like do you need 598 00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:32,480 any assistance? There's there's no point in like 599 00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:35,400 both of us being awake at all because then you wake up in the 600 00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:38,800 morning and it's honestly like you ever see the, you know, like 601 00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:42,360 2 heroin addicts at a bus stop and people are like as Pines 602 00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:45,480 fall apart. That's that's what user like 603 00:31:45,480 --> 00:31:47,040 just you'd be like. Is it? 604 00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:48,800 Is it? Do you want a piece of toast and 605 00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:51,560 you're fucking like. Like flopping off. 606 00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:55,920 The sofa people. Gone to the dogs. 607 00:31:56,560 --> 00:32:00,000 But like, it's, it's honestly like someone said like, oh, the 608 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:06,120 first three months or whatever. And honestly, like, I think when 609 00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:08,200 they say three months, they mean like the sleeping pattern and 610 00:32:08,200 --> 00:32:11,680 everything. But like, let honestly, it must 611 00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:14,000 have been like 3 months up to the fucking day. 612 00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:17,280 And Eddie just slept through the night and we were like, you 613 00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:21,880 know, Oh my God. So and then they get the hang of 614 00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:24,440 that for a few months and then they start getting teeth and 615 00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:29,680 then it's fucking up all night. I have to tell you this the 616 00:32:29,680 --> 00:32:33,880 other night, like Eddie's been sleeping well and then he got a 617 00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:38,800 few teeth in and and then they they came through a bit and then 618 00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:41,360 he set all the way bit and then he started eating food. 619 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:45,960 And obviously like the whole, the whole nappy situation is a 620 00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:48,400 fucking journey. The whole time you're like, oh, 621 00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:53,000 regular shit, absolute disaster. What's this tsunami of shit? 622 00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:57,560 Is he OK? But we were feeding him like, 623 00:32:57,840 --> 00:33:00,240 you know, pure in like cauliflower and wheat broccoli 624 00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:01,520 and stuff. And now that I think about it, 625 00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:03,760 I'm like, this would be a grown adult shit as pants. 626 00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:05,840 Oh, but also, that's my writer for Stand Up Show. 627 00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:11,240 Can I get pure age fuck but that So we we went to bed the other 628 00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:13,160 night, right? He fell asleep downstairs. 629 00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:16,840 We carried him up, put him in the wee bedside cop thing, both 630 00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:18,920 of us asleep. He's asleep and then just wakes 631 00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:23,160 up screaming like full blown, like not even crying, just like 632 00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:29,560 with his eyes closed and just screaming and screaming. 633 00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:31,800 And he was like sweating. He was like clammy. 634 00:33:31,800 --> 00:33:34,560 And I was like, Oh my God, fucking whipped all the they 635 00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:36,320 sleep in this week, like sleeping bag thing. 636 00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:39,240 Took all that shit off, took all the clothes off just as nappy. 637 00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:42,200 And he's like sticky like sweating, screaming and 638 00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:45,880 screaming and screaming. And I automatically was like 639 00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:48,640 when I jumped out of bed, I was like pulled a pair of shorts on 640 00:33:48,640 --> 00:33:51,480 and put a hoodie on. And when we went downstairs, I 641 00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:53,560 had car keys in my pocket and I was like, we're going to have to 642 00:33:53,560 --> 00:33:58,160 fucking go here somewhere. And I was like, it's, it's 643 00:33:58,160 --> 00:34:01,720 obviously like his, his belly or something. 644 00:34:01,720 --> 00:34:03,760 You know what I mean? The way he was like struggling 645 00:34:03,760 --> 00:34:05,840 like this. I'm more even sitting on the 646 00:34:05,840 --> 00:34:11,560 sofa hold and he just fuck it. I swear to God, the the longest 647 00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:14,000 fart you've ever heard in your life. 648 00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:19,040 And like a fucking like a truck driver with diarrhoea. 649 00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:20,880 It was like. And it wasn't. 650 00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:22,320 Even a ship. But he was, it was obviously 651 00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:24,480 like just gas. You know. 652 00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:26,440 Like when you fart yourself, there's, there's a bit of, 653 00:34:27,199 --> 00:34:29,600 there's a bit of like cooperation with the fart. 654 00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:30,400 You know what I mean? You're like. 655 00:34:31,159 --> 00:34:34,480 You push. It out of it, he just like it 656 00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:35,920 was. Just it was, it was like 657 00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:37,520 someone. Fucking knife the tyre. 658 00:34:37,520 --> 00:34:42,520 It was just like and he he did a couple of these honestly like 659 00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:45,400 fucking 10 second farts and then just straight to sleep, no 660 00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:52,120 clothes on, sweating. And the funniest bit of it was. 661 00:34:53,639 --> 00:34:56,280 I had to. I had to turn out in the 662 00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:58,400 morning. When he fucking dropped 1 and I 663 00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:00,600 was like, because we're part you're panicking. 664 00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:04,880 It's stressful when a baby's just like screaming and I and I 665 00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:07,520 was like, I legit was like, was that you or him? 666 00:35:07,520 --> 00:35:09,560 And she was like, it was him. And I was like, thank God. 667 00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:14,320 It would it would have been way, way more funny in all the heat 668 00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:16,080 of that. You know. 669 00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:18,400 If you had about like. Like was. 670 00:35:18,400 --> 00:35:21,240 That your image. That was me, but phone an 671 00:35:21,240 --> 00:35:30,000 ambulance. That's like, I've never changed 672 00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:32,840 to not be on a baby before or an adult. 673 00:35:34,760 --> 00:35:38,480 I just, I just like, I know it'll be, I know it'll be grand. 674 00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:40,680 Like I'm, I'm sort of calm, but it all. 675 00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:43,760 But I've never had like, sleep disruption ever. 676 00:35:43,760 --> 00:35:45,520 Like, you know, I can get 16 hours a night. 677 00:35:45,520 --> 00:35:48,440 Like I don't, I don't like to be woken up. 678 00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:50,600 Like I'm hoping whenever we actually go to hospital to have 679 00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:52,960 there'll be another card just for the wee man to get in. 680 00:35:53,240 --> 00:35:54,760 Well, yeah. That's that's the issue. 681 00:35:54,760 --> 00:35:57,840 Like, you know, I got sent home by a midwife. 682 00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:00,440 She was like can you go home please and go to sleep? 683 00:36:01,160 --> 00:36:02,680 Because you'll be. No use to anybody. 684 00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:07,480 And I was like, OK, yeah, Just like I don't know how many 685 00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,720 fucking times I've been up and down to Craigavon Hospital at 686 00:36:09,720 --> 00:36:11,000 this point. I could drive there with my 687 00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:14,600 fucking eyes closed but don't. But don't. 688 00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:18,920 Don't. But yeah, it's fucking. 689 00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:21,640 It's just it mightn't be a bad thing. 690 00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:27,040 That there's. Like a lockdown because at least 691 00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:29,520 you'll you'll be there a lot you. 692 00:36:29,600 --> 00:36:31,400 Know. Have you had like contact with 693 00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:33,640 anyone else? Like even like we sort of 694 00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:35,440 social. Sitting in the. 695 00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:38,880 Garden jobs now not. Not really, no, no. 696 00:36:39,760 --> 00:36:41,680 That. I mean, we were lucky that like 697 00:36:42,840 --> 00:36:47,640 Maureen's family were quite close and they obviously more 698 00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:48,880 after that. Maureen was in hospital and 699 00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:50,440 stuff. So like her sisters were so 700 00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:51,720 helpful and her mum and everything. 701 00:36:53,120 --> 00:36:55,840 That I don't know whether. Yeah, I don't know, It might be 702 00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:58,240 OK because they're in lockdown. You don't have much else to do. 703 00:36:58,360 --> 00:37:03,040 Yeah, Yeah. But because I was, I was on 704 00:37:03,040 --> 00:37:06,040 fucking terror and going in the hospital boring and everything, 705 00:37:06,040 --> 00:37:07,800 you know what I mean? It was like fucking chaos. 706 00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:09,880 But yeah, you should be all right. 707 00:37:09,880 --> 00:37:12,920 Like you just, you'll just be tired and like, yeah, things go 708 00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:16,160 out the window where like, you know, the house is a fucking 709 00:37:16,160 --> 00:37:19,600 mess and all that. Shit but like. 710 00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,480 Who gives a fuck girl baby, why? Are you not helping me tidy? 711 00:37:23,040 --> 00:37:24,720 I know. That would be my concern with 712 00:37:24,720 --> 00:37:28,280 you is like and I, I envy this. And you, sometimes you, you can 713 00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:30,840 be like, this is the way I like it and that's it. 714 00:37:32,080 --> 00:37:35,640 And I, I, I get like 100 I, I wish I was a wee bit more like 715 00:37:35,640 --> 00:37:39,040 that. But yeah, there, there'll be a 716 00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:41,840 few times where like you're, you'll feel invisible. 717 00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:44,920 Do you know what I mean? Oh, I'll say something about it. 718 00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:46,800 Oh no. It doesn't matter because like. 719 00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:50,280 See. Was it? 720 00:37:50,280 --> 00:37:52,800 Last was last year with the big Odyssey shows. 721 00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:56,920 Was that was that this year? 1010 year anniversary of Iron 722 00:37:56,920 --> 00:37:58,800 Fighter Was that last year? This year, Yeah, it was like. 723 00:37:58,800 --> 00:38:00,600 Last July so. You. 724 00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:04,120 You were gonna. Like do like the shows were kind 725 00:38:04,120 --> 00:38:08,080 of like a big marker of of that, like a big celebration of of 726 00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:10,400 that. And you were you were like 727 00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:12,440 shooting some stuff. Like we shot a couple of things. 728 00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:14,800 Yeah, you were gonna do like a big like 10 year and fighter 729 00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:16,360 thing. But obviously, like with 730 00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:20,080 everything that went on, you you you probably just didn't get the 731 00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:21,960 vote as much time that maybe as you thought you were going to. 732 00:38:21,960 --> 00:38:26,520 Are you still planning to do something like like a big video 733 00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:29,480 type thing? I think I saw you then again 734 00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:35,800 maybe mention it like a couple of weeks ago I think. 735 00:38:36,720 --> 00:38:42,280 It's just. I think, I think now I like, I 736 00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:44,080 need to like delegate a lot of stuff. 737 00:38:44,160 --> 00:38:49,480 You know, if I was looking at all the stuff I was doing, you 738 00:38:49,480 --> 00:38:55,160 know, filming a full length documentary for fun on the side 739 00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:59,600 doesn't really fit into the schedule too well. 740 00:38:59,600 --> 00:39:03,840 So what I would rather do is hang back and. 741 00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:09,520 Just figure A. Figure, you know, I would nearly 742 00:39:09,520 --> 00:39:14,800 like set build it around a gig. So like have a premier gig and 743 00:39:14,800 --> 00:39:18,280 if people bought tickets have like a package where you get a 744 00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:19,880 ticket, you get to come to see the thing. 745 00:39:19,880 --> 00:39:23,800 There'd be a bit of stand up and maybe like get a merch or 746 00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:29,080 something thrown in and try and actually pay some people to 747 00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:32,560 fucking help me out and like make it like properly make it 748 00:39:32,560 --> 00:39:35,240 instead of me set, you know, set my camera up and trying to piece 749 00:39:35,240 --> 00:39:37,840 it together. So I'd rather do it properly and 750 00:39:37,840 --> 00:39:39,640 try and make a bit of an event of it. 751 00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:44,760 Just like I guess a bigger version of the things we started 752 00:39:44,760 --> 00:39:47,320 doing like when you when you, me and Mickey first met doing well 753 00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:50,200 maybe childhood this in the second the famous BBC sketch you 754 00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:51,960 lol. Oh yeah. 755 00:39:52,160 --> 00:39:54,240 You, you had an iron fighter premier. 756 00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:56,600 You weren't even you. I don't think you were in stand 757 00:39:56,600 --> 00:39:58,200 up yet. No. 758 00:39:58,360 --> 00:40:01,640 In Steph Kitten. And it was me, Mickey and 759 00:40:01,640 --> 00:40:02,840 General Fiasco. Me, Mickey. 760 00:40:02,840 --> 00:40:04,240 General Fiasco. More than conquerors. 761 00:40:04,240 --> 00:40:07,200 Is that right? Well, generally that's all the 762 00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:10,200 lads. Maybe not. 763 00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:12,640 He was more than conquerors. Yeah. 764 00:40:13,760 --> 00:40:15,840 But Oh yeah, we did a formal with general fiasco. 765 00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:17,720 That's what. Remember, there was just a 766 00:40:17,720 --> 00:40:18,760 she's. Fucking. 767 00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:22,280 Terrible one me you, Mickey and general fiasco didn't school 768 00:40:22,280 --> 00:40:24,040 formal. I mean now that would be great, 769 00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:26,800 but back in the day it wasn't so great. 770 00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:30,000 I just. Got fucking like PTSD there when 771 00:40:30,000 --> 00:40:31,840 you said that, yeah. How many? 772 00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:36,600 Gigs like I that, that's one thing you develop over the 773 00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:38,320 years. It's just the confidence that 774 00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:39,720 they say no. Oh. 775 00:40:39,720 --> 00:40:41,080 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or like. 776 00:40:41,320 --> 00:40:43,880 You know, maybe you sort yourself out and you you're in 777 00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:46,640 some way financially stable and you can just be like, I'm not 778 00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:48,160 doing that for. I. 779 00:40:48,160 --> 00:40:52,000 Think, I think what what you do get over time is the ability to 780 00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:55,080 sniff out when someone's I mean, you can get we'll you definitely 781 00:40:55,080 --> 00:40:56,920 get it wrong from time to time and you go, this'll be all right 782 00:40:56,920 --> 00:40:58,880 now it's not. But I think, you know, off the 783 00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:01,000 face of it, when you've done enough bad ones, you go. 784 00:41:01,720 --> 00:41:04,120 I know from everything this person saying they mean the 785 00:41:04,120 --> 00:41:06,200 best, but this is not going to be good. 786 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:08,840 Like this isn't going to work. So you probably like figure that 787 00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:11,320 out quicker. But it is mad the first couple 788 00:41:11,320 --> 00:41:15,600 of times that you turned because back in those days we've done 789 00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:20,080 anything for £50 on a stage. Yeah, but but now you kind of 790 00:41:20,080 --> 00:41:22,080 have to balance it out against but. 791 00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:25,240 Like. Do I want to go and do this? 792 00:41:25,240 --> 00:41:27,800 And it's terrible. And there's 300 people there who 793 00:41:28,160 --> 00:41:30,440 even though it's not like a proper stand up gig, they might 794 00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:33,480 judge on it or, or something, You know, I think it's better 795 00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:37,120 just to eat, just to be able to go, like you say now, like, no, 796 00:41:37,120 --> 00:41:39,960 that's not I I. I think if if you're a comedian, 797 00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:42,880 you get the certain level of people are coming pen to just 798 00:41:42,880 --> 00:41:44,840 see you, yeah. Yeah, you're done. 799 00:41:45,240 --> 00:41:46,920 You know what I mean? It's like that's how you do 800 00:41:46,920 --> 00:41:50,560 stand up now. It's like, it's almost like, you 801 00:41:50,560 --> 00:41:54,680 know, if you were like a professional sports person, you 802 00:41:54,680 --> 00:41:59,840 would be like, I play at the top level on the best pitches with 803 00:41:59,840 --> 00:42:02,080 the best gear and the best people around me. 804 00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:04,600 That's how that's how you're going to get the best enemy. 805 00:42:05,200 --> 00:42:08,960 I don't need to turn up on a Sunday and some like Ploughed 806 00:42:08,960 --> 00:42:11,200 Field to play fucking rugby or so you know what I mean? 807 00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:13,440 It's like, give me the best shit at the Valley. 808 00:42:13,720 --> 00:42:15,920 Exactly. Give me the best shit. 809 00:42:17,400 --> 00:42:19,160 Yeah, I know. But yeah, I mean, having said 810 00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:21,040 that, if someone was like, do you want to do a formal with 811 00:42:21,040 --> 00:42:23,440 general fiasco now I'll be like, fucking right. 812 00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:26,120 It would actually be like good crack man. 813 00:42:26,720 --> 00:42:28,280 Because you wouldn't. Give a fuck at all but I 814 00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:31,120 remember like you know, join them for. 815 00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:37,360 The last song. That the Rebel get by, general. 816 00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:40,800 Fasco or like, oh, do you remember they had AI now? 817 00:42:40,800 --> 00:42:44,000 I was trying to, I seen the scenario that was about to 818 00:42:44,000 --> 00:42:47,040 happen and I started drinking like a fucking maniac. 819 00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:50,560 It was terrible. And The thing is, back then, you 820 00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:54,200 have no ability to adopt. You basically go this are the, 821 00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:56,320 these are the set of tools I have and I'm going to go up and 822 00:42:56,320 --> 00:42:59,920 do this bullshit material about Loose Women here and there. 823 00:42:59,920 --> 00:43:01,680 Everyone's just eating a fucking Pavlova. 824 00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:04,240 Like no, give us a 17 year. Old do you remember? 825 00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:06,760 Was there a hotel room if I remember correctly? 826 00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:10,760 Basically. Straight outside the back door 827 00:43:10,760 --> 00:43:12,440 of the room, the. Band. 828 00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:15,080 Yeah, I wasn't. Oh yeah. 829 00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:16,840 Usually smoking with them. I think I can. 830 00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:20,440 Remember literally going out like 2 fire doors like this in 831 00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:23,160 the hall, in the hall and through a door and that was like 832 00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:25,920 their room. Yeah, vaguely, vaguely rings a 833 00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:29,040 bell. But I, I, I feel like I missed 834 00:43:29,040 --> 00:43:30,840 so much back in those days because I didn't smoke. 835 00:43:31,040 --> 00:43:34,360 Everybody smoked and I just, it was just always me and like the 836 00:43:34,360 --> 00:43:36,960 sound guy just standing there. I like the background. 837 00:43:37,600 --> 00:43:41,720 Oh my God, we've got listeners questions, we'll get to them. 838 00:43:41,720 --> 00:43:45,960 But first of all, lol, we did a me me. 839 00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:52,000 We met because me, you, Mickey, Ashlyn, B, Yasmin, Akram, couple 840 00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:54,280 more people did a sketch show. We've all done well. 841 00:43:54,840 --> 00:43:59,440 Look at us now it. Lets you goes like Ashley B 842 00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:03,720 Hollywood superstar. Yes, yes, man, Akram Sherlock, 843 00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:06,080 you know she's done like a load of BBC drums. 844 00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:08,320 And then the boys still kicking about where you left. 845 00:44:10,720 --> 00:44:12,840 Where? Where is she making calling now? 846 00:44:13,280 --> 00:44:14,800 She is talking. She is. 847 00:44:14,800 --> 00:44:16,600 Talking. Into ATV remote and I'm drinking 848 00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:21,320 out of a fucking flask. Killing. 849 00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:23,840 It that that. That, that is the, that was the 850 00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:27,680 epitome of being asked to do something, not asking any 851 00:44:27,680 --> 00:44:30,920 questions, just going like, oh, it's a, it's ABBC. 852 00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:36,000 It's the British Broadcasting Corporation coming to us, 853 00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:39,920 looking us to be in a show. Yeah, you, you. 854 00:44:39,920 --> 00:44:43,880 Came to the pavilion to watch a bit of stand up just when that 855 00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:46,560 show like almost got announced. We were. 856 00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:48,120 Just there to watch a bit of stand up. 857 00:44:48,120 --> 00:44:51,920 We got chatting then and then we did this sketch show, which 858 00:44:52,520 --> 00:44:55,480 there were definitely like decent sketches in it, but then 859 00:44:55,480 --> 00:44:58,360 there was a lot of sketches that were that were not decent. 860 00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:03,520 And the good thing about it was it got like, it got a lot of 861 00:45:03,520 --> 00:45:07,080 shit, like a lot of people hated it, but not enough people 862 00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:09,760 watched it where it was bad. And back in the day, that's a, 863 00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,520 that's a win. Oh yeah, you know what I mean. 864 00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:15,720 When, when people hate it, but not enough people saw, you know, 865 00:45:15,720 --> 00:45:17,560 that, that that's sort of a success. 866 00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:21,800 Like I remember doing a sketch. Of course, I was doing like a 867 00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:24,800 Danny Dyer impression sketch. And by the way, I could not do 868 00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:26,960 an impression with Danny Dyer. Why did they let me do it? 869 00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:29,560 And it was Danny Dyer's deadliest man. 870 00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:33,280 And I had written one to do to shoot it a caricory road bridge. 871 00:45:33,280 --> 00:45:34,880 That's what it was. It was Danny Dyer's deadliest 872 00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:39,560 bridges. And, and I remember on the day 873 00:45:40,440 --> 00:45:43,200 turning to Ray the producer and being like here, what time are 874 00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:45,280 we going to caricory that to do this? 875 00:45:45,280 --> 00:45:47,800 And he goes, ah, fuck it, we'll go to the Ormoor Road and shoot 876 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:50,360 at the bridge there. That, that summed it up. 877 00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:52,920 That was, that was the, that was the show. 878 00:45:53,240 --> 00:45:56,240 Well, it's I don't. Know how many times I fucking 879 00:45:56,240 --> 00:46:01,480 shit on the BBC at this point, like, but this is what they do 880 00:46:01,520 --> 00:46:08,040 they they fucking have no calm. Like by the way, any any day of 881 00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:14,720 the week they could ring me. You fucking make any anybody 882 00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:20,160 McCann even like Dave, certainly I'd be like, can you make us a 883 00:46:20,160 --> 00:46:22,440 cheaply made, very funny sketch show? 884 00:46:22,880 --> 00:46:25,760 And it would be fucking finished by the end of the week and it 885 00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:28,160 would do well. But they they they never commit 886 00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:29,040 to anything. They're like, this is 887 00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:31,600 experimental, which means if you think it's shape, sure, we 888 00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:33,440 weren't really trying, you know what I mean? 889 00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:37,240 We, we sort of did that in a way with and I'll show you how good 890 00:46:37,240 --> 00:46:39,960 something like that could be with a thing called hack job, 891 00:46:39,960 --> 00:46:43,720 which was what it sounded like. We just went out and fill them 892 00:46:43,720 --> 00:46:47,880 like a load of sketches in at the dub, at the playing fields, 893 00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:51,200 at the dub and got got mates to send stuff in. 894 00:46:51,200 --> 00:46:55,280 You cut it together with a bit of a sting at the start and it 895 00:46:55,280 --> 00:46:58,240 was, it was better than a thing. It was better than any of those 896 00:46:58,240 --> 00:46:59,640 schedules. If I have. 897 00:46:59,640 --> 00:47:03,680 One talent. It's making up like a formula 898 00:47:04,240 --> 00:47:07,440 and giving it a name. I'll tell you. 899 00:47:07,440 --> 00:47:09,120 What? It would fucking thrive right 900 00:47:09,120 --> 00:47:10,520 now 100%. Because. 901 00:47:10,760 --> 00:47:15,840 It was basically like a collaboration show, but you, you 902 00:47:15,840 --> 00:47:19,280 sort of didn't have any responsibility for anyone else's 903 00:47:19,280 --> 00:47:22,120 shit. Everybody, everybody did their 904 00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:25,280 own stuff. And then I cut it together and 905 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:28,080 it was like the fast show, like dead quick cuts and everything. 906 00:47:28,080 --> 00:47:29,880 And it was fucking brilliant. And it cost nothing. 907 00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:33,320 But I, I can remember doing that at the time like as a bit of a 908 00:47:33,320 --> 00:47:36,640 fuck you to, they were making another show. 909 00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:38,560 Was it late Licence 2 or something? 910 00:47:39,720 --> 00:47:43,640 Is that about the same time? I want to say yeah, yeah, yeah, 911 00:47:43,640 --> 00:47:45,320 it was. We were supposed to do that and 912 00:47:45,320 --> 00:47:46,760 then we didn't. Yeah, I. 913 00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:51,040 Mean it's it's hilarious that like how shit it is when like a 914 00:47:51,040 --> 00:47:55,600 bunch of fucking broke comedians are saying no to TV work that's 915 00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:58,960 how shy it was you're like Nah, it's actually doesn't pay me and 916 00:47:59,680 --> 00:48:01,600 I'm going to look like a cunt and no one's going to see it 917 00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:04,320 anyway so well we. We just said like, because we 918 00:48:04,320 --> 00:48:06,400 were going to we did the first year he's a late licence and 919 00:48:06,400 --> 00:48:10,120 then we didn't do the second one and we were like, look, let's 920 00:48:10,120 --> 00:48:13,520 just do something else and do our own like what we think 921 00:48:13,960 --> 00:48:15,760 something would and should look like. 922 00:48:16,440 --> 00:48:20,040 But hack job was great. I think we did maybe six of them 923 00:48:20,040 --> 00:48:22,520 or something. They were just short episodes, 924 00:48:22,720 --> 00:48:25,520 like the boys were doing positive spied as well, which 925 00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:27,480 was like you could definitely still do that now. 926 00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:29,120 Like that was brilliant. You could do a. 927 00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:32,920 Million of them. I yeah, like I was, I was trying 928 00:48:32,920 --> 00:48:36,040 to think of a way to like get 6 of them easily. 929 00:48:36,040 --> 00:48:39,880 And it was like, you know, say you had a SketchUp be like film 930 00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:42,240 six of those. Yeah, me and Begley went and 931 00:48:42,240 --> 00:48:46,640 filmed that actor acting coach guy and shot like six of those 932 00:48:48,240 --> 00:48:51,520 and did a bunch of shit. But that's all it takes. 933 00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:55,200 Like you just come up with like a wee formula film, film like 6 934 00:48:55,200 --> 00:48:58,320 or 8 of them and have six or eight people do that and then 935 00:48:58,320 --> 00:49:03,040 all of a sudden you've got like, you know, a fucking miniseries 936 00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:03,720 like. Yeah, because. 937 00:49:03,720 --> 00:49:05,480 There's no like, There's no like. 938 00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:08,760 Not just locally, but like, I don't think there's any sketch 939 00:49:08,760 --> 00:49:12,560 real sketches anymore. And it's a shame because people 940 00:49:12,560 --> 00:49:14,760 are like, oh, sketches dead. It's not. 941 00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:19,160 It's just about doing it right. Nobody like that's one of the 942 00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:22,960 things I maybe look into when this whole thing is over is like 943 00:49:24,040 --> 00:49:27,480 instead of giving off about the BBC and how shit everything is 944 00:49:27,480 --> 00:49:30,720 and nobody backs any local like actual talent. 945 00:49:30,720 --> 00:49:33,760 You know what I mean? Like some people get, you know, 946 00:49:33,760 --> 00:49:37,640 we better work here and there, but it's like, you know, I'd 947 00:49:37,640 --> 00:49:40,640 love to try and somehow crowdfunder, fund something 948 00:49:40,640 --> 00:49:44,880 differently to actually make like the TV show that you want 949 00:49:44,880 --> 00:49:46,480 to see. Well. 950 00:49:46,480 --> 00:49:51,880 You could do that like like I guess Patreon is is taking off 951 00:49:51,880 --> 00:49:55,240 so much for everyone and that's what people are essentially 952 00:49:55,240 --> 00:49:59,080 letting you do is just here creatively, I'm going to back 953 00:49:59,080 --> 00:50:01,600 you here like financially as well. 954 00:50:01,880 --> 00:50:05,320 And then you just get there. Like it? 955 00:50:05,320 --> 00:50:08,280 It just brings a wee bit of that freedom to to go and do the sort 956 00:50:08,280 --> 00:50:11,520 of project you want to do. Like I haven't been doing it for 957 00:50:11,520 --> 00:50:13,320 very long, but even now I'm like flip. 958 00:50:14,000 --> 00:50:16,720 That's that's people who trust you almost. 959 00:50:16,720 --> 00:50:19,560 And they're like here, keep making the things you're making, 960 00:50:19,560 --> 00:50:22,360 you know, because they understand that it's not like 961 00:50:22,360 --> 00:50:26,160 maybe it was back in the day where a broadcaster would go 962 00:50:26,760 --> 00:50:28,200 here. We're just going to like employ 963 00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:30,320 you for a year, right? Stuff, you know, we'll, we'll 964 00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:34,680 put out the old thing. So think like Patreon is that, 965 00:50:34,680 --> 00:50:37,000 is that news? I mean, I'm aware I sound very 966 00:50:37,000 --> 00:50:39,120 old when I say Patreon's that new thing, people. 967 00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:40,560 It's been the new thing for a decade. 968 00:50:40,560 --> 00:50:45,240 But then yeah, I think we I think there's always been like 969 00:50:45,240 --> 00:50:47,640 here, should we do this and do that? 970 00:50:47,640 --> 00:50:52,120 Then with the whole lockdown thing, like not just stand up, 971 00:50:52,120 --> 00:50:53,800 but with so many things, I'm like, why? 972 00:50:54,120 --> 00:50:56,840 Why do I always say like, oh, this would be a good idea and 973 00:50:56,840 --> 00:50:59,840 then not do it like the other day when we were talking about 974 00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:01,600 that sleeve Donner thing. Look, I haven't seen that for 975 00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:03,680 years. I'd love to see a sunrise up 976 00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:05,840 sleeve Donnerd. And then just went this. 977 00:51:06,120 --> 00:51:08,840 There's no excuse not to do it now, you know. 978 00:51:08,840 --> 00:51:13,160 So I'd say if if, if you or collectively we were all doing 979 00:51:13,160 --> 00:51:16,240 something like that, now would be the time to start planning 980 00:51:16,240 --> 00:51:19,560 it, you know, because everybody should now be going right. 981 00:51:19,680 --> 00:51:21,280 What what are we doing after this? 982 00:51:21,400 --> 00:51:22,800 Like I don't know what I'm doing after this. 983 00:51:23,280 --> 00:51:25,200 Well, the. Patreon thing was is weird too, 984 00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:29,000 because like it's such a weird like people who people who are 985 00:51:29,320 --> 00:51:32,320 on my Patreon, like I'll put something up and people are 986 00:51:32,320 --> 00:51:35,160 like, man, thank you so much for uploading this. 987 00:51:35,160 --> 00:51:36,040 And you're like, what do you mean? 988 00:51:36,040 --> 00:51:38,000 Thank you? You're paying the fucking see it 989 00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:41,840 back, but you can't, you can't make enough stuff. 990 00:51:41,840 --> 00:51:46,440 And like, even, you know, I get fucking hounded for stuff. 991 00:51:46,440 --> 00:51:49,240 I'll be like, oh, I've got a live podcast that I found here 992 00:51:49,240 --> 00:51:50,920 and I'd upload it. They were like, where's this 993 00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:52,240 live podcast? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 994 00:51:52,240 --> 00:51:54,560 I. Noticed that or when you're like 995 00:51:54,560 --> 00:51:56,040 a day. Late with a podcast? 996 00:51:56,040 --> 00:51:57,600 Yeah. Or like calling me. 997 00:51:57,840 --> 00:51:59,600 I've had a. Lot of I've merch from the 998 00:51:59,600 --> 00:52:02,640 Odyssey that. I've changed them. 999 00:52:02,640 --> 00:52:03,960 I was. Going to make a new shop and all 1000 00:52:03,960 --> 00:52:08,280 this bullshit and people are like, can I just fucking send 1001 00:52:08,280 --> 00:52:11,800 you money and you send me even if it's not on the website? 1002 00:52:11,800 --> 00:52:13,920 Where's these fucking like people looking to like orange 1003 00:52:13,920 --> 00:52:18,160 beanies in the middle of summer? You know, so it's class that 1004 00:52:18,160 --> 00:52:21,880 they're, they're so hungry for stuff like, but, and then I sort 1005 00:52:21,880 --> 00:52:25,320 of like, I put the, I put like last year's stand up show and 1006 00:52:25,400 --> 00:52:30,240 the SSE show online and people are like, it's fucking mental to 1007 00:52:30,240 --> 00:52:35,680 see like people tagging you on, you know, Instagram stories and 1008 00:52:35,680 --> 00:52:37,480 stuff. And they're like sitting down 1009 00:52:37,640 --> 00:52:39,280 their Saturday. Night Doritos. 1010 00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:41,720 Out bears at all watching the fucking show and you're like, 1011 00:52:41,720 --> 00:52:43,040 that's wild. Well. 1012 00:52:43,040 --> 00:52:48,040 That fucking wild that is, I think whenever you see the 1013 00:52:48,440 --> 00:52:51,360 something you're you're doing and then you see like directly 1014 00:52:51,360 --> 00:52:53,440 see the feedback it's getting like that's why maybe it's 1015 00:52:53,440 --> 00:52:56,680 difficult with TV because it's harder to get a gauge on how 1016 00:52:56,680 --> 00:52:58,920 people are interpreting it or whatever. 1017 00:52:59,240 --> 00:53:01,480 But whenever me and Dave were doing the radio show and you'd 1018 00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:06,480 see people being like, you see people with a carrier and their 1019 00:53:06,480 --> 00:53:09,160 families sitting and you're like, what's mental is this is 1020 00:53:09,320 --> 00:53:10,760 just audio. You know what I mean? 1021 00:53:10,760 --> 00:53:13,400 Like this is just it's on old school. 1022 00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:15,120 Radio days where people are like. 1023 00:53:15,520 --> 00:53:17,560 Spotify exists. You could just go and listen to 1024 00:53:17,560 --> 00:53:19,800 the tracks, but they're actually being like, no, this is like our 1025 00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:22,600 we weekend, by the way. I bet you're fucking, you know, 1026 00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:25,680 I bet you there's established. You know. 1027 00:53:25,680 --> 00:53:29,280 Radio and actual dance DJ's going like who the fuck? 1028 00:53:29,800 --> 00:53:32,920 Is this fucking asshole Pete Tong slamming down his 1029 00:53:32,920 --> 00:53:35,480 newspaper? Fuck. 1030 00:53:35,480 --> 00:53:37,160 Is Sean? Yeah, but. 1031 00:53:37,160 --> 00:53:39,560 Just just like. You. 1032 00:53:39,560 --> 00:53:42,120 Know all these fucking you know, guys like, well, it's Saturday 1033 00:53:42,120 --> 00:53:44,400 night with such and such and here's all the tunes and you 1034 00:53:44,400 --> 00:53:48,240 swat in and be like I you know, I bet you're probably at the 1035 00:53:48,240 --> 00:53:51,120 desk on I don't even know what buttons to touch play fucking 1036 00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:53,640 Gina G and I think I touched the button. 1037 00:53:55,320 --> 00:53:55,800 Oh. No. 1038 00:53:57,960 --> 00:53:59,800 Just you. One of those like, hey, it 1039 00:53:59,800 --> 00:54:01,240 brushes in your mouth like you're fucking. 1040 00:54:03,120 --> 00:54:06,160 I was doing a show in a hazmat suit way before Corona. 1041 00:54:10,840 --> 00:54:13,560 We've got listeners questions. We'll rifle through some of 1042 00:54:13,560 --> 00:54:17,280 these. Oh, Jesus, you saying that 1043 00:54:17,280 --> 00:54:19,560 reminds me of remember that interview we love? 1044 00:54:19,920 --> 00:54:23,040 And it's, I think it's a woman, Doctor Dodd, who interviewed the 1045 00:54:23,200 --> 00:54:25,560 guys in the graveyard, your McDonald's. 1046 00:54:25,880 --> 00:54:28,880 And it's the two guys in West Belfast standing with her arms 1047 00:54:28,880 --> 00:54:30,360 around each other outside of bookies. 1048 00:54:30,360 --> 00:54:31,760 You're the one I'm talking about. 1049 00:54:31,760 --> 00:54:34,440 And she's like, what if I told you I'm Jewish? 1050 00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:36,720 And he's like, what? The fuck You're the. 1051 00:54:36,760 --> 00:54:39,360 One I'm talking about. Vaguely. 1052 00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:41,720 Is that a different video? Yeah, yeah. 1053 00:54:41,720 --> 00:54:44,320 It's earlier in that. One video it's from. 1054 00:54:44,320 --> 00:54:47,640 The same time she was here, but it's it's a different video and 1055 00:54:47,640 --> 00:54:49,840 I don't know why I haven't been able to find it since. 1056 00:54:49,840 --> 00:54:51,360 But guys, never. Even heard that. 1057 00:54:52,200 --> 00:54:58,240 Jewish fuck sake. Have you I I've been talking 1058 00:54:58,240 --> 00:55:00,920 about it flat out in the podcast of tagging or I'll send you the 1059 00:55:00,920 --> 00:55:04,200 clip, but there's a clip. It's my, it's my it might be my 1060 00:55:04,200 --> 00:55:06,000 favourite video ever. Where like. 1061 00:55:06,640 --> 00:55:08,320 It must be. From the 90s maybe. 1062 00:55:08,520 --> 00:55:11,440 And they were, they'd shut off. I don't even know what Rd it is 1063 00:55:11,440 --> 00:55:13,480 or where the fuck it is, but there's like a March going on or 1064 00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:16,760 something and they've shut the road and this guy who couldn't 1065 00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:19,880 look more, you know, like moustache, big square glasses. 1066 00:55:20,440 --> 00:55:24,160 And he goes, he comes out, he goes, there's a line of cops and 1067 00:55:24,160 --> 00:55:25,800 he goes. Can't even get that chippy. 1068 00:55:26,160 --> 00:55:28,200 I can't even get that Chinese. And he goes. 1069 00:55:28,320 --> 00:55:30,640 I can't even get a pet. And then and then he's so 1070 00:55:30,680 --> 00:55:32,880 intense and he just goes, I guess what's all this? 1071 00:55:33,480 --> 00:55:35,680 And it is. It's the fucking. 1072 00:55:36,320 --> 00:55:39,040 It's. So he's so intense and it's it's 1073 00:55:39,040 --> 00:55:41,840 my favourite clip ever. Like just to be like, he's like, 1074 00:55:41,840 --> 00:55:44,920 this is it's Friday night. I need a Chinese and he can't 1075 00:55:44,920 --> 00:55:47,240 get past this line of pingers and he's like, what the fuck? 1076 00:55:51,360 --> 00:55:53,080 Tremendous. Like, and the amount of people 1077 00:55:53,080 --> 00:55:54,480 hit me up like, where's that clip? 1078 00:55:54,480 --> 00:55:57,200 Where's that clip? And it's just six seconds of 1079 00:55:57,200 --> 00:55:58,800 fucking gold. Oh my God. 1080 00:55:59,400 --> 00:56:00,280 Very. Enjoyable. 1081 00:56:00,440 --> 00:56:04,240 What's all this and I supplement says who'd win in the thumb war? 1082 00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:12,840 Me 40% from about four metres. Away I have like I I when I did 1083 00:56:12,840 --> 00:56:16,440 judo when I was younger, I fucking fully desiccated my 1084 00:56:16,440 --> 00:56:19,240 thumb and it but it came out and went back in in the same 1085 00:56:19,240 --> 00:56:21,880 movement and it was like enormous. 1086 00:56:21,880 --> 00:56:26,040 And I have like, you know, it's like a crocodile's jaw, like all 1087 00:56:26,040 --> 00:56:28,520 the pressure just goes down. I can't lift it. 1088 00:56:28,520 --> 00:56:30,960 Like if you if you put pressure on the top, I can't lift it up. 1089 00:56:30,960 --> 00:56:32,520 So you'd probably absolutely win. 1090 00:56:32,520 --> 00:56:33,760 Maureen beats me on the thumb more. 1091 00:56:35,360 --> 00:56:37,080 That's the culture, that's who you're doing. 1092 00:56:37,160 --> 00:56:39,480 Bats of diamond lockdown. Hey, what you would do at the 1093 00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:41,560 weekend? Thumb more competition? 1094 00:56:41,640 --> 00:56:43,680 Yeah, me. Practise all week. 1095 00:56:44,440 --> 00:56:47,360 Matthew Merlin says, has lockdown kick started a Patreon 1096 00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:49,000 revolution? Where do you see it heading? 1097 00:56:49,240 --> 00:56:52,720 We're talking about that a bit. But yeah, if if you could, I 1098 00:56:52,720 --> 00:56:55,440 guess to make a better question out of the one Matthew asked, 1099 00:56:55,440 --> 00:56:59,200 because frankly it wasn't a great question, would how much I 1100 00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:01,280 just have an ongoing feud with and I. 1101 00:57:01,280 --> 00:57:04,480 Fucking talk down to my listers. Well, Matthew Merlin who has a 1102 00:57:04,480 --> 00:57:09,800 terrible haircut, but if you could do 1 project with say 1103 00:57:09,800 --> 00:57:12,680 somebody was like here's X amount of money, enough for you 1104 00:57:12,680 --> 00:57:14,360 to get cameramen, all that kind of thing. 1105 00:57:14,520 --> 00:57:16,720 Maybe not the project you were talking about, just some 1106 00:57:16,720 --> 00:57:19,000 different like would you like to do like short film? 1107 00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:23,800 Would you do like a ridiculous music video, like a full DJ 1108 00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:28,120 Khaled type type music video? What's what's 1 project you'd 1109 00:57:28,120 --> 00:57:34,240 like to do? It's it's kind of like, I don't 1110 00:57:34,240 --> 00:57:36,000 know, do you know what I would probably do? 1111 00:57:36,000 --> 00:57:42,600 Like a travel show, but like, you know, something like trying 1112 00:57:42,600 --> 00:57:44,640 to make it funny. I don't know whether it would be 1113 00:57:44,640 --> 00:57:46,720 like comedians on tour or whatever, but like. 1114 00:57:48,360 --> 00:57:51,160 I would I probably. Wouldn't go down the sketch show 1115 00:57:51,160 --> 00:57:53,760 thing or like trying to make a movie or whatever. 1116 00:57:53,760 --> 00:57:55,200 I would. I would do like a travel show 1117 00:57:55,200 --> 00:57:57,440 and just go do a bunch of weird shit so. 1118 00:57:57,520 --> 00:57:59,960 I had but. But I would probably take take 1119 00:57:59,960 --> 00:58:03,520 like a bunch of people. Yeah, I had a an idea, man. 1120 00:58:03,520 --> 00:58:07,920 But we were talking about of it's probably been done in some 1121 00:58:07,920 --> 00:58:13,240 way, but you go on Skyscanner, you say you're going from 1122 00:58:13,240 --> 00:58:16,720 Belfast or Dublin and that morning that you're going to go 1123 00:58:16,720 --> 00:58:19,000 or the night before you go on Skyscanner. 1124 00:58:19,000 --> 00:58:21,960 You know the way you can philtre like Belfast anywhere and 1125 00:58:21,960 --> 00:58:24,800 anywhere in the world. You pack like the cheapest 1126 00:58:24,800 --> 00:58:28,560 flights that are outside say the UK and Ireland and go for the 1127 00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:30,280 day. Where's the cheapest day trip we 1128 00:58:30,280 --> 00:58:33,000 can go on tomorrow? And you get like already morning 1129 00:58:33,000 --> 00:58:37,120 flight, last flight home. And I think the challenge was. 1130 00:58:37,880 --> 00:58:39,480 How far? How far could you go look? 1131 00:58:40,560 --> 00:58:42,120 Oh. Like some of them were like 1132 00:58:42,120 --> 00:58:46,320 Eastern Europe, some were, you know, it's the usual sort of 1133 00:58:46,320 --> 00:58:50,400 ones like France being Portugal, but sometimes they were not the 1134 00:58:50,400 --> 00:58:53,480 touristy type places, you know, like an airport out in the 1135 00:58:53,480 --> 00:58:56,800 middle of nowhere. So that like was the sort of 1136 00:58:56,800 --> 00:59:00,640 loose theme was you have like £50 each and what are you going 1137 00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:02,520 to do for the day? So you could go do touristy 1138 00:59:02,520 --> 00:59:04,920 things. You could get something to eat, 1139 00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:07,760 I don't know, we just, we just thought it would be fun, quick 1140 00:59:07,760 --> 00:59:10,000 to shoot and also it's not going to cost you much because your 1141 00:59:10,000 --> 00:59:12,880 flights might be £15. Just you. 1142 00:59:12,880 --> 00:59:16,200 And him getting the fucking Nandos and every Easter black 1143 00:59:16,200 --> 00:59:22,360 shithole you can find here we are in fucking the Ukraine 1144 00:59:22,360 --> 00:59:25,320 getting the Nandos. Do you have any vegan parties 1145 00:59:25,400 --> 00:59:26,280 getting a? Chernobyl. 1146 00:59:26,280 --> 00:59:27,080 Perry. Perry. 1147 00:59:29,520 --> 00:59:31,760 It's Perry. Perry fucking 2 headed cap. 1148 00:59:34,360 --> 00:59:35,600 I've been unlocked up. Not much. 1149 00:59:35,600 --> 00:59:44,000 I would eat it, Donny says. Yeah, this is this is weird, he 1150 00:59:44,000 --> 00:59:45,360 says. Have you seen the weird itchy 1151 00:59:45,360 --> 00:59:47,440 feed account that's been around your tweets? 1152 00:59:48,120 --> 00:59:50,280 Have you seen this as well? Yeah, you've been following a 1153 00:59:50,280 --> 00:59:53,920 few scratches yourself. So. 1154 00:59:54,000 --> 00:59:58,320 I think accounts like that like it wouldn't even call it really 1155 00:59:58,320 --> 01:00:02,480 troll accounts, but. Think of the actual real life 1156 01:00:02,480 --> 01:00:05,720 admin that goes into that because that's a person like 1157 01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:09,840 setting up the like getting the e-mail, confirming their account 1158 01:00:09,880 --> 01:00:12,560 and then going, I'm just going to like really reply to all 1159 01:00:12,560 --> 01:00:14,200 these guys and sort of see what happens. 1160 01:00:14,400 --> 01:00:18,720 Like there, there's something like biz, something very bizarre 1161 01:00:18,720 --> 01:00:22,760 about it, you know, just always like wanting a response comment 1162 01:00:22,760 --> 01:00:24,120 and everything. And then obviously you're going 1163 01:00:24,120 --> 01:00:27,400 to block it because it's, it's like it's, it's weird. 1164 01:00:27,520 --> 01:00:30,440 You're not going to agree with it, but then what happens when 1165 01:00:30,440 --> 01:00:33,240 that when you block a person, do they just go, Oh well, it's 1166 01:00:33,240 --> 01:00:36,320 good, you know what a good run it's. 1167 01:00:36,600 --> 01:00:39,560 I have no idea what the fuck is wrong with people. 1168 01:00:39,560 --> 01:00:45,040 Like they're not Like obviously that probably is. 1169 01:00:45,400 --> 01:00:47,480 Some. Sort of sexual kink type thing. 1170 01:00:47,480 --> 01:00:50,200 I was talking about this recently on a podcast. 1171 01:00:50,200 --> 01:00:53,960 It's like there'll be people into that, like probably. 1172 01:00:54,680 --> 01:00:58,560 Oh yeah, tell me but. It's like fucking, I'm so sick 1173 01:00:58,560 --> 01:01:00,480 of the fucking Internet, like just shit like that. 1174 01:01:00,480 --> 01:01:03,600 Do you know what I mean? Getting fucking anonymous abuse 1175 01:01:03,600 --> 01:01:05,520 out of nowhere. It's got to start going to 1176 01:01:05,520 --> 01:01:07,040 people's houses and fucking kneecapping them. 1177 01:01:08,200 --> 01:01:12,880 But it is that it is that thing of like you have to think of the 1178 01:01:12,880 --> 01:01:16,320 people that like no one's first of all, no one's happy, No happy 1179 01:01:16,320 --> 01:01:20,120 person is logging on to do that. And 2nd, there's no, there's no 1180 01:01:20,120 --> 01:01:24,640 sexy people and you never turn onto a real sexy person and be 1181 01:01:24,640 --> 01:01:26,680 like, what are you doing? They're like, and just, I'm 1182 01:01:26,680 --> 01:01:30,400 saying Colin was late with the podcast, so I'm just, I'm just 1183 01:01:30,880 --> 01:01:33,240 commenting. Where's Thomas on his last name 1184 01:01:33,240 --> 01:01:36,560 on Instagram? You know, no knockouts are doing 1185 01:01:36,560 --> 01:01:37,440 that. No. 1186 01:01:37,520 --> 01:01:42,680 Totally no fucking right. It's it's just like, oh fuck. 1187 01:01:42,960 --> 01:01:45,360 Have a new bit of material on conspiracy theorists like that, 1188 01:01:46,600 --> 01:01:49,400 saying like I have a conspiracy that no conspiracy theorists are 1189 01:01:49,400 --> 01:01:50,760 good looking. Like show me a good looking 1190 01:01:50,760 --> 01:01:52,720 conspiracy theorists. It's very true. 1191 01:01:52,720 --> 01:01:57,080 Lucky Chris Henning says. I mean, this is one people would 1192 01:01:57,080 --> 01:01:58,360 probably want to know the answer to. 1193 01:01:58,360 --> 01:02:00,280 Who'd win in a fight between you 2? 1194 01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:05,040 I mean, let's be sensible here. Me. 1195 01:02:06,560 --> 01:02:08,480 What? What age is that guy, 12? 1196 01:02:10,360 --> 01:02:15,360 I mean, I think a fight, but the only thing I could really hope 1197 01:02:15,360 --> 01:02:18,400 for would be to spend enough time using an earthquake 1198 01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:20,240 techniques. Yeah, like, just enough. 1199 01:02:21,720 --> 01:02:25,200 Like just just moving around quickly enough to the point 1200 01:02:25,200 --> 01:02:27,720 where you might forget about the fight and then at that point I 1201 01:02:27,720 --> 01:02:30,760 could try something. But yeah, I just have to make it 1202 01:02:30,760 --> 01:02:32,560 last. Like if I if I could get. 1203 01:02:33,480 --> 01:02:35,680 If we were going to. Fight then like a fight and it 1204 01:02:35,680 --> 01:02:38,480 was 5 rounds. I think I could maybe move 1205 01:02:38,480 --> 01:02:42,440 around enough to get the 2nd and then it would be curtains it. 1206 01:02:42,440 --> 01:02:46,000 Depends what sort of fight like you know, if you if you trained 1207 01:02:46,000 --> 01:02:49,560 enough in boxing and we boxed and like you were real way 1208 01:02:49,560 --> 01:02:52,240 quicker and your movement was better. 1209 01:02:53,120 --> 01:02:58,240 Yeah, yeah, your brain neck. No, but I know. 1210 01:02:58,240 --> 01:03:02,280 But like if you got, if you got good at Axel boxing, not not 1211 01:03:02,280 --> 01:03:05,640 just punching and like moving and I couldn't get at you, I 1212 01:03:05,640 --> 01:03:07,640 might just get really tired and just pick me apart. 1213 01:03:07,640 --> 01:03:08,880 Do you know why that wouldn't happen? 1214 01:03:08,880 --> 01:03:10,680 Because. You ever see white collar boxing 1215 01:03:10,680 --> 01:03:13,520 like videos of it? There's fellas who like play a 1216 01:03:13,520 --> 01:03:17,560 lot of sport who are naturally fit then maybe in good shape and 1217 01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:20,720 they're obviously doing well in the training. 1218 01:03:20,720 --> 01:03:24,960 Like I'd say that they're working out with a boxing coach, 1219 01:03:25,320 --> 01:03:28,120 hitting the bag really well, Rd runs, all that kind of thing. 1220 01:03:28,280 --> 01:03:30,720 As soon as that bell goes and there's like 80 year mates going 1221 01:03:31,000 --> 01:03:36,320 Cactus fucking prime. They put up. 1222 01:03:36,320 --> 01:03:39,160 Like, you know, they look like fucking Mayweather on the speed 1223 01:03:39,160 --> 01:03:43,120 bag and then and then they just turn up and it's like Ding, 1224 01:03:43,120 --> 01:03:45,800 Ding. And there's fucking like head, 1225 01:03:45,880 --> 01:03:49,640 head back like that. Well, in those videos, is there 1226 01:03:49,640 --> 01:03:52,240 always a woman and you can't tell whether it's just 20 or 80 1227 01:03:52,440 --> 01:03:59,240 and she go fucking kill him, kill him, get a get a name for 1228 01:03:59,400 --> 01:04:00,520 it. I. 1229 01:04:01,160 --> 01:04:05,160 I remember years ago watching there was a, there was a 1230 01:04:05,160 --> 01:04:08,120 documentary about Wayne McCulloch on, I don't know what 1231 01:04:08,120 --> 01:04:10,000 it was following his journey in America or whatever. 1232 01:04:10,320 --> 01:04:13,120 And right away his wife or his girlfriend or something at the 1233 01:04:13,120 --> 01:04:15,080 time. And it showed you, you know, 1234 01:04:15,080 --> 01:04:17,320 it's just like a regular documentary, like highlights or 1235 01:04:17,320 --> 01:04:19,040 like behind the scenes of every fight. 1236 01:04:19,040 --> 01:04:21,520 And they were ringside and all you could hear was come on. 1237 01:04:21,600 --> 01:04:23,160 Wayne. Come. 1238 01:04:23,160 --> 01:04:25,520 On Wayne and my dad turned it off. 1239 01:04:26,240 --> 01:04:28,000 He's like. I can't fucking listen to her. 1240 01:04:28,480 --> 01:04:29,280 Every. Fight. 1241 01:04:29,280 --> 01:04:32,160 Come on, Wayne. I remember. 1242 01:04:32,160 --> 01:04:35,280 Going to watching Northern Ireland under 21 football match 1243 01:04:36,000 --> 01:04:39,880 and the one of the players got like injured or he was done and 1244 01:04:39,880 --> 01:04:43,120 he'd been wrecked by another player and his partner or wife 1245 01:04:43,120 --> 01:04:44,760 whatever was sitting in a big fur coat. 1246 01:04:44,800 --> 01:04:46,600 By the way, this was at the Oval, right? 1247 01:04:46,600 --> 01:04:49,520 But sitting there for. Fur coat, big, proper. 1248 01:04:49,520 --> 01:04:51,760 Earrings because he was he was playing over in England at times 1249 01:04:51,760 --> 01:04:54,960 so maybe making a few quid. But this is like early naughties 1250 01:04:55,520 --> 01:05:00,840 and he got wrecked by this guy. And the, the the wife or partner 1251 01:05:00,920 --> 01:05:06,120 just shouted to her partner, get up off your fat horse. 1252 01:05:06,120 --> 01:05:09,120 You a bastard. And I have never enjoyed 1253 01:05:09,120 --> 01:05:11,520 anything more in my life. He'd been wrecked. 1254 01:05:11,520 --> 01:05:12,960 Like he hadn't dived or anything. 1255 01:05:13,120 --> 01:05:15,400 Yeah, it's just very, very enjoyable. 1256 01:05:15,760 --> 01:05:17,480 I remember. I'd probably told this before 1257 01:05:17,480 --> 01:05:20,640 someone's made of mine. When I was younger, Dad took us 1258 01:05:20,640 --> 01:05:22,960 to see a preseason and it was Linfield, Liverpool. 1259 01:05:23,560 --> 01:05:25,320 And it was. This is how long ago this was. 1260 01:05:25,320 --> 01:05:28,720 It was Michael Owens first game for Liverpool and. 1261 01:05:28,760 --> 01:05:34,320 So like what, 961997 maybe? Yeah, night say 96 it was a. 1262 01:05:34,360 --> 01:05:36,360 Young, young lad. Look. 1263 01:05:36,440 --> 01:05:41,800 And I just remember the fucking racial abuse going on in the 1264 01:05:41,800 --> 01:05:43,960 stands. I was like, Oh my God. 1265 01:05:44,600 --> 01:05:45,120 Like. Literally. 1266 01:05:45,160 --> 01:05:47,760 I can't remember, it was obviously some black black dude 1267 01:05:47,760 --> 01:05:49,760 playing for Liverpool and they were like fuck. 1268 01:05:50,440 --> 01:05:52,080 Chuck. Him on the Bony and I was here. 1269 01:05:52,080 --> 01:05:57,440 That's a cut. Jesus Christ, Michael Owen just 1270 01:05:57,440 --> 01:05:59,480 running rings around everybody. See, I think. 1271 01:05:59,480 --> 01:06:03,600 You'd I think you'd like to go to Irish league games because an 1272 01:06:03,600 --> 01:06:07,080 amateur league games or, or whatever level I play at, I 1273 01:06:07,080 --> 01:06:10,000 think you would enjoy an hour and a half there every Saturday 1274 01:06:10,240 --> 01:06:11,880 because it's just some of the things you hear. 1275 01:06:12,000 --> 01:06:15,520 See whenever you have two, two benches going at each other, 1276 01:06:15,520 --> 01:06:18,120 like the level I play at, there's no spectators really. 1277 01:06:18,120 --> 01:06:21,920 Like so you can hear everything what you wouldn't normally hear 1278 01:06:21,920 --> 01:06:22,920 at a match. Yeah. 1279 01:06:22,920 --> 01:06:25,880 So like, there's always someone's dad, they said. 1280 01:06:26,680 --> 01:06:28,480 Like shooting. With the assistant coach on the 1281 01:06:28,520 --> 01:06:32,400 other side and the phrase you fucking clown gets used like I 1282 01:06:32,400 --> 01:06:37,000 love that phrase. It gets used so much like it's, 1283 01:06:37,000 --> 01:06:40,000 but you can just tell these boys are bottling it in all week and 1284 01:06:40,000 --> 01:06:43,200 then Saturday comes and it's a chance to just give it to 1285 01:06:43,200 --> 01:06:44,360 people. Well. 1286 01:06:44,440 --> 01:06:47,480 There's certain, there's certain like phrases that I think are 1287 01:06:47,520 --> 01:06:51,120 only used in like shit football matches and Northern Ireland. 1288 01:06:51,520 --> 01:06:54,320 Let them know you're there. He'll get well. 1289 01:06:54,320 --> 01:06:56,080 We. We, you and I joke about this 1290 01:06:56,080 --> 01:06:58,680 all the time, but when someone goes, when you have the ball and 1291 01:06:58,680 --> 01:07:02,400 you're having a bad game and an opposition member of the bench 1292 01:07:02,400 --> 01:07:04,800 goes, he'll give you. He doesn't want that. 1293 01:07:05,280 --> 01:07:07,040 Yeah. No matter what, it always gets 1294 01:07:07,040 --> 01:07:09,840 in your head and you go fucking don't want that. 1295 01:07:10,040 --> 01:07:12,400 Like boys, always bottle it whenever that happens. 1296 01:07:12,560 --> 01:07:14,440 I I. I sort of stopped playing 1297 01:07:14,440 --> 01:07:19,520 football when I was maybe like fucking 13 or something because 1298 01:07:19,520 --> 01:07:21,760 I was playing rugby pretty much. But like some. 1299 01:07:21,760 --> 01:07:24,120 Of the shit that would get said at these leagues on a Saturday. 1300 01:07:24,960 --> 01:07:27,400 He's got a touch of a rapist like. 1301 01:07:27,880 --> 01:07:31,680 A 48 year old shouting at a 14 year old, you know what I mean? 1302 01:07:33,120 --> 01:07:36,440 He's fucking. He's keep back down that tackle 1303 01:07:36,440 --> 01:07:41,680 fucking queer I. Remember playing this match and 1304 01:07:41,680 --> 01:07:47,760 that the fucking what was it? The coach came on, someone had 1305 01:07:47,760 --> 01:07:49,320 fucked up. I don't want to get like give 1306 01:07:49,320 --> 01:07:51,760 away a pal there something stupid and they were going to 1307 01:07:51,760 --> 01:07:53,640 bring him off and he was like, I'm not. 1308 01:07:53,720 --> 01:07:55,560 Fucking going off of it and the other guy. 1309 01:07:55,720 --> 01:07:59,200 The other teammate pushed him and he the guy took his boot off 1310 01:07:59,240 --> 01:08:01,160 and hit him on the fucking head with a boot. 1311 01:08:01,840 --> 01:08:04,640 And the two coaches like literally like dragging him off 1312 01:08:04,640 --> 01:08:06,080 like he was getting kicked out of a nightclub. 1313 01:08:06,560 --> 01:08:10,080 And you're like, they just see it always seemed like when you 1314 01:08:10,080 --> 01:08:13,000 played those like Belfast teams, you're like, Jesus Christ. 1315 01:08:14,040 --> 01:08:16,880 Also like if someone took the boot off now and hit you with 1316 01:08:16,880 --> 01:08:19,640 it, it would be fine because it's like soft plastic studs now 1317 01:08:19,640 --> 01:08:24,359 but back in the day metal metal, metal mouldies made metal studs. 1318 01:08:25,000 --> 01:08:26,600 Split your head open like yeah or like. 1319 01:08:26,600 --> 01:08:28,920 Boys would like, This is why they're banned in rugby. 1320 01:08:28,920 --> 01:08:31,600 But you'd have like the blades, you know, the weak things. 1321 01:08:32,120 --> 01:08:33,880 Yeah. And on the, on the walk to the 1322 01:08:33,880 --> 01:08:36,800 pitch, they would fucking scuff on the tarmac or whatever. 1323 01:08:37,279 --> 01:08:38,520 Yeah. And they would, they would be so 1324 01:08:38,520 --> 01:08:41,399 sharp. That's why like they check them 1325 01:08:41,399 --> 01:08:43,479 in rugby because you have to have those big fucking, you 1326 01:08:43,479 --> 01:08:47,880 know, long metal round studs. Do you like, could you ever see 1327 01:08:47,880 --> 01:08:49,760 yourself playing? Do you think you'll ever play 5A 1328 01:08:49,760 --> 01:08:53,680 set again in your life? After my illustrious career, 1329 01:08:55,080 --> 01:08:56,760 yeah, why not? Why would I not play 5A set? 1330 01:08:57,240 --> 01:08:58,279 I don't know. Like I can't. 1331 01:08:58,439 --> 01:09:00,120 Once again, this goes. Back to the climbing the 1332 01:09:00,120 --> 01:09:02,120 mountain thing, who the fuck am I playing for? 1333 01:09:02,120 --> 01:09:04,520 I couldn't get 5 people together. 1334 01:09:04,800 --> 01:09:06,560 I just. Like, because you, you like, you 1335 01:09:06,560 --> 01:09:09,680 play football for like local clubs you're playing in like 1336 01:09:10,000 --> 01:09:13,000 junior tournaments and all that. And I can't work out in my head 1337 01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:16,319 how you can't not know, just still want to be playing 1338 01:09:16,319 --> 01:09:18,960 football. I just like, it's weird. 1339 01:09:18,960 --> 01:09:22,640 It's weird to me that I even though I say that, it's weird to 1340 01:09:22,640 --> 01:09:26,240 me that at this age I still play on a Saturday because yeah, when 1341 01:09:26,240 --> 01:09:29,840 you think about it, it's like we're we're all trying like 1342 01:09:30,080 --> 01:09:31,640 people to play football and stuff. 1343 01:09:32,520 --> 01:09:35,640 You you think it's like the Premier League getting stripped 1344 01:09:35,680 --> 01:09:37,800 out, team talk, let's go lads and all. 1345 01:09:38,319 --> 01:09:41,720 But really when you watch what we're doing, it's like it's like 1346 01:09:41,720 --> 01:09:43,399 playing dress up, you know what I mean? 1347 01:09:43,439 --> 01:09:45,479 Like it really is like. It's like theatre. 1348 01:09:45,560 --> 01:09:49,479 You're just like, yeah, boys like, you know, have a certain 1349 01:09:49,479 --> 01:09:52,000 way of taping their fucking socks and boots and shin pads 1350 01:09:52,000 --> 01:09:53,319 and all. You're like the what? 1351 01:09:53,960 --> 01:09:56,200 Barely run. For the next fucking 45 minutes. 1352 01:09:57,480 --> 01:10:00,840 But I don't know like I. I don't know. 1353 01:10:01,480 --> 01:10:02,080 I. Liked. 1354 01:10:03,920 --> 01:10:05,200 I don't know. I you see. 1355 01:10:06,160 --> 01:10:08,160 I like things. When they're actually really 1356 01:10:08,360 --> 01:10:11,080 competitive. Does that make? 1357 01:10:11,080 --> 01:10:15,080 Sense it's all it's almost like the competition or. 1358 01:10:17,920 --> 01:10:20,000 The the. Seriousness of like training, I 1359 01:10:20,000 --> 01:10:22,320 like more. I, I was never in the just 1360 01:10:22,400 --> 01:10:24,960 playing football for the crack. Same with rugby. 1361 01:10:24,960 --> 01:10:28,760 Like I loved when you were training five times a week, you 1362 01:10:28,760 --> 01:10:31,480 know, and going out there like you're trying to fucking smash 1363 01:10:31,480 --> 01:10:33,200 people. And it was deadly serious. 1364 01:10:33,720 --> 01:10:36,360 And then when I went to uni it was like, oh, can we, can we get 1365 01:10:36,360 --> 01:10:39,960 15 guys together to play some fucking shitty match? 1366 01:10:40,040 --> 01:10:42,400 I hated that. I hated the drop in like 1367 01:10:42,400 --> 01:10:44,600 seriousness. Yeah, but. 1368 01:10:45,320 --> 01:10:49,760 I think the there's still like a competitive thing across the 1369 01:10:49,760 --> 01:10:53,960 board with everything look. 5A side's great because it's that 1370 01:10:53,960 --> 01:10:56,640 sort of blend of like sometimes it does get competitive but 1371 01:10:56,640 --> 01:10:58,480 you're just playing with your mates and you can like mess 1372 01:10:58,480 --> 01:11:01,840 about. Can I, can I tell you something? 1373 01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:04,920 I, I, I on my last podcast, I don't know if you listened to 1374 01:11:04,920 --> 01:11:07,840 it, probably not, but not yet. I was talking about being. 1375 01:11:09,000 --> 01:11:10,920 At a. Tournament like a 7A side 1376 01:11:10,920 --> 01:11:13,640 tournament when I was younger and I've I was telling Maureen 1377 01:11:13,640 --> 01:11:15,800 this story the other day and I told her the story and then I 1378 01:11:15,800 --> 01:11:18,840 went night and she didn't react to it and I was like if I told 1379 01:11:18,840 --> 01:11:22,840 this to she and Tolly piss himself, it was like a it was 1380 01:11:22,840 --> 01:11:25,760 like by the way, I was probably built more or less like this 1381 01:11:25,760 --> 01:11:29,080 when I was playing football, but at the seven side tournament and 1382 01:11:29,560 --> 01:11:34,200 literally I think we might have played like six games and I got. 1383 01:11:36,120 --> 01:11:38,120 I'm a wee. Plaque for a top goal scorer 1384 01:11:38,120 --> 01:11:42,960 because it was like 28 goals in about 6 matches and Gabriel 1385 01:11:42,960 --> 01:11:46,200 Battistudit just fucking rattling them in from all over 1386 01:11:46,200 --> 01:11:50,840 the place and that I won player of the tournament and it was 1387 01:11:50,840 --> 01:11:54,800 legit like they say your name and I was like, I don't I never 1388 01:11:54,800 --> 01:12:00,000 win anything but I've got this fucking and some. 1389 01:12:00,760 --> 01:12:02,960 I said there was always like scouts there, right? 1390 01:12:02,960 --> 01:12:05,760 And but do you ever? Do you ever? 1391 01:12:05,760 --> 01:12:07,200 Experience that when you were younger people. 1392 01:12:07,200 --> 01:12:10,080 Like there's a scout there but if they didn't say Man United 1393 01:12:10,080 --> 01:12:12,080 you're like sure who the fuck would play for? 1394 01:12:13,080 --> 01:12:14,040 Who the fuck? 'S playing for. 1395 01:12:14,040 --> 01:12:19,600 QPR suck my Dick. But that word got. 1396 01:12:19,600 --> 01:12:22,520 Back to me, right? Someone goes. 1397 01:12:22,520 --> 01:12:24,840 Someone goes oh, partly. Your. 1398 01:12:25,240 --> 01:12:26,920 Guy's probably a paedophile. They're like. 1399 01:12:28,080 --> 01:12:28,960 Like. Guy. 1400 01:12:29,000 --> 01:12:31,960 Over there, you know. Said he had his eye on you, you 1401 01:12:31,960 --> 01:12:35,360 know, very powerful, you know, fucking forward. 1402 01:12:35,920 --> 01:12:37,480 Scored. Loads of goals and everything. 1403 01:12:37,560 --> 01:12:39,880 And I went, Oh yeah. And he goes, yeah, he said that 1404 01:12:39,880 --> 01:12:46,280 you reminded him of a young John Hartson, which I'm pretty sure 1405 01:12:46,280 --> 01:12:47,760 did he play for Celtic at the time. 1406 01:12:48,040 --> 01:12:50,320 Played for Celtic. West Ham Yeah, that was the. 1407 01:12:51,080 --> 01:12:54,120 You know when you're when you're in a fucking plan for a team 1408 01:12:54,200 --> 01:12:57,280 that's out of at a football pitch beside like Rathcool 1409 01:12:57,280 --> 01:13:00,160 Estate and someone goes, you play like a young John Hartson, 1410 01:13:00,160 --> 01:13:07,080 all your mates, they're like. Loser ginger fat. 1411 01:13:07,080 --> 01:13:09,080 Bastard. I got, I got done with that 1412 01:13:09,080 --> 01:13:10,600 once. I remember being in the game and 1413 01:13:11,000 --> 01:13:12,960 there's really important match and they said there were scouts 1414 01:13:12,960 --> 01:13:15,720 here and I was buzzing for it and at the end of game they said 1415 01:13:15,720 --> 01:13:17,000 you want to go mate. Then I went over. 1416 01:13:17,000 --> 01:13:21,480 It was just two kids, 10 knots. Like actual. 1417 01:13:21,480 --> 01:13:27,120 Scouts, What's happening, Shane? Yeah, I know. 1418 01:13:27,760 --> 01:13:31,480 The best goal I ever scored was for I was in the scouts up until 1419 01:13:31,640 --> 01:13:36,280 the last last year and no I whenever I was about 11. 1420 01:13:36,280 --> 01:13:39,640 I also played for the scouts team and I scored a goal, a semi 1421 01:13:39,640 --> 01:13:43,240 final of a tournament and we've gone into extra time down at the 1422 01:13:43,240 --> 01:13:47,800 Danny Blanche floor Stadium. And Paul bounced up and a half 1423 01:13:47,800 --> 01:13:50,360 volleyed law of the keeper from about 30 yards. 1424 01:13:50,440 --> 01:13:52,640 Although back in the day when you were so small, it felt like 1425 01:13:52,640 --> 01:13:57,200 30 yards was probably 8. And my, my dad have been in the 1426 01:13:57,200 --> 01:13:59,200 box, like, video recording some of the game. 1427 01:13:59,880 --> 01:14:02,400 And when I scored the goal, I turned around to make sure he 1428 01:14:02,400 --> 01:14:03,680 had it on camera. Bury me. 1429 01:14:03,960 --> 01:14:07,160 And he had been like, either changing the battery on the 1430 01:14:07,160 --> 01:14:09,640 camera or doing something. Not only had he not recorded, 1431 01:14:09,640 --> 01:14:11,640 but he'd also missed it, which was pretty sweet. 1432 01:14:13,080 --> 01:14:16,640 But yeah, like, football mean, like, great moments in football 1433 01:14:16,640 --> 01:14:18,440 mean probably more to me than stand up. 1434 01:14:18,440 --> 01:14:20,280 Like, whenever I scored that goal in that charity game at 1435 01:14:20,280 --> 01:14:24,880 Seaview and put it up 98 times, that moment is better than, 1436 01:14:24,880 --> 01:14:27,840 like, doing a good gig. Like for sure. 1437 01:14:28,200 --> 01:14:31,440 Oh yeah, it's you always want to be like, good at the thing that 1438 01:14:31,440 --> 01:14:33,080 you're like, you're not. Supposed to be good at. 1439 01:14:33,240 --> 01:14:35,240 It's not your. Main thing like, yeah, yeah, 1440 01:14:37,400 --> 01:14:39,400 yeah. I remember once the best goal 1441 01:14:39,400 --> 01:14:40,880 ever scored. So a keeper. 1442 01:14:41,000 --> 01:14:45,560 It was down like the pitches on the Shore Rd, like beside the 1443 01:14:45,560 --> 01:14:48,040 church, that big fucking giant church. 1444 01:14:48,040 --> 01:14:54,640 And the keeper, the keeper, the keeper just fucking got the 1445 01:14:54,640 --> 01:14:56,840 ball, kicked it out of his hands and it came the whole way up the 1446 01:14:56,840 --> 01:14:59,400 halfway line and I just caught it on the volley and sent it 1447 01:14:59,400 --> 01:15:01,000 right back over his head into the net. 1448 01:15:01,640 --> 01:15:04,720 But I think there was only matches where like, I think you 1449 01:15:04,720 --> 01:15:06,840 were winning like fucking 7 nil or something. 1450 01:15:06,920 --> 01:15:09,920 So yeah, it was, it wasn't even that. 1451 01:15:09,920 --> 01:15:12,320 Everyone was just like, Oh well, there's another fucking goal 1452 01:15:12,520 --> 01:15:14,240 when I was playing. For the scout team, we were 1453 01:15:14,240 --> 01:15:17,480 playing a team of other scouts, but they had a mixed team, 1454 01:15:17,800 --> 01:15:19,320 right? So they had boys and girls. 1455 01:15:19,960 --> 01:15:22,000 Already must have. Been like 6 nil up within a 1456 01:15:22,000 --> 01:15:25,240 couple of minutes and I was really like going for I was 1457 01:15:25,240 --> 01:15:29,160 wearing yellow Puma king boots. It was maybe like 10 and I'd 1458 01:15:29,160 --> 01:15:32,040 scored like a good few against the team already and I was 1459 01:15:32,040 --> 01:15:34,120 thinking I can maybe score 20 or 30 in this game. 1460 01:15:34,880 --> 01:15:37,640 He brought he brought me off after about 15 minutes because 1461 01:15:38,000 --> 01:15:40,040 he's like no, this other team, they haven't played many games 1462 01:15:40,040 --> 01:15:41,960 and it's a mixed team. I started crying. 1463 01:15:43,400 --> 01:15:45,000 Maybe. Were you like the rigger? 1464 01:15:45,000 --> 01:15:46,160 Where? They're like, yeah, it's mixed 1465 01:15:46,160 --> 01:15:53,000 teams as we go on the yellow boots as he's our, he's our wee 1466 01:15:53,000 --> 01:15:57,120 girls. Like a wee scrunchy in your hair 1467 01:15:57,160 --> 01:16:00,080 just for no reason. Kind of scrunchy in my hair now. 1468 01:16:00,480 --> 01:16:04,000 I ordered a hair band of Amazon, like, you know, one with the wee 1469 01:16:04,000 --> 01:16:06,160 teeth. And then when I put it on I went 1470 01:16:06,520 --> 01:16:08,400 back off back. Oh. 1471 01:16:08,440 --> 01:16:11,160 Really only once you had it on Do you think that was a bad cop? 1472 01:16:15,120 --> 01:16:18,960 Before, before I let you go, let me ask you this. 1473 01:16:21,040 --> 01:16:24,520 If you got to do stand up again, like say they said, like 1474 01:16:24,520 --> 01:16:29,200 lockdowns lifted, get to do stand up again anywhere you want 1475 01:16:29,560 --> 01:16:31,560 and you get to do one. Say this Saturday night you get 1476 01:16:31,560 --> 01:16:32,800 to do a gig, where would you do it? 1477 01:16:34,720 --> 01:16:39,840 I would do it laveries I would have I would have like just all 1478 01:16:39,840 --> 01:16:44,120 the boys on and I would just oversell it and ram it to the 1479 01:16:44,120 --> 01:16:47,120 deck and just fucking. Well, you say all the boys on, 1480 01:16:47,120 --> 01:16:48,880 but if people are listening being like why you're not having 1481 01:16:48,880 --> 01:16:50,560 women on? I could come in the yellow boots 1482 01:16:50,560 --> 01:16:53,280 and put put the hair band in and we could we could get around 1483 01:16:53,280 --> 01:16:54,200 that. Give it up for Shane. 1484 01:16:54,240 --> 01:16:57,040 And a scrunchie. There he is. 1485 01:16:58,720 --> 01:17:00,200 Yeah. I mean, yeah, I'd be. 1486 01:17:00,320 --> 01:17:03,200 That could be a character piece, but man, I gotta go because 1487 01:17:03,200 --> 01:17:07,840 listen, I've got a podcast coming up here with which I had 1488 01:17:07,840 --> 01:17:12,560 Michael Murray. Here how many times the Dornan 1489 01:17:12,560 --> 01:17:14,280 say grubber kick in that podcast? 1490 01:17:14,760 --> 01:17:17,280 What's great is I don't know what that is, but I was like, Oh 1491 01:17:17,280 --> 01:17:21,480 yeah, I was like. I was like, he's pushing for you 1492 01:17:21,480 --> 01:17:24,720 to go. Do you have a ball there, Jamie? 1493 01:17:24,720 --> 01:17:26,600 And you could fuck it. Show us one of these grubber 1494 01:17:26,600 --> 01:17:29,400 kicks. Everything. 1495 01:17:29,400 --> 01:17:32,200 Just came back that I just in the garden hitting grubber kicks 1496 01:17:32,200 --> 01:17:34,600 man. I mean, definitely a lot of a 1497 01:17:34,600 --> 01:17:36,400 lot of our comedy friends look like they could have the 1498 01:17:36,400 --> 01:17:38,480 nickname Grubber. Like Mickey could definitely be 1499 01:17:38,480 --> 01:17:41,520 Grubber for sure. Mickey on the first night back 1500 01:17:41,520 --> 01:17:45,680 at Laveries will be like, you know, you're over emotional Ma 1501 01:17:45,680 --> 01:17:48,640 at a fucking wedding you, but you'll have to like put his coat 1502 01:17:48,640 --> 01:17:50,440 on and put him in a taxi and be like, oh, you're going to be 1503 01:17:50,440 --> 01:17:54,360 like, I just cancel. It as soon as he arrives. 1504 01:17:54,360 --> 01:17:56,880 He'll go, boys, I'm not. Drinking tonight as soon as he 1505 01:17:56,880 --> 01:17:59,960 arrives. And he's got it. 1506 01:18:00,000 --> 01:18:01,200 You're like, it's not a bag of flour. 1507 01:18:01,200 --> 01:18:03,240 And he's like, that's cocaine. That's. 1508 01:18:04,720 --> 01:18:06,680 I'll be drink. I'll be doing all coke tonight 1509 01:18:06,880 --> 01:18:08,800 basically. Enjoyable. 1510 01:18:08,840 --> 01:18:13,600 Bring it back, Bring it back. Take me back to yeah, Even those 1511 01:18:13,600 --> 01:18:16,120 terrible gigs we talked about. Do any of them now? 1512 01:18:16,120 --> 01:18:19,320 Oh, fuck. Anyway, my man, I appreciate, 1513 01:18:19,320 --> 01:18:22,760 appreciate your time. Cheers for cheers for doing the 1514 01:18:22,760 --> 01:18:23,960 pod. No worries. 1515 01:18:23,960 --> 01:18:26,400 Going to go out the back and had a few grubber kicks against the 1516 01:18:26,400 --> 01:18:28,240 wall. I'm going to find those yellow 1517 01:18:28,240 --> 01:18:33,920 boots. Are you are you proper ending 1518 01:18:33,920 --> 01:18:35,920 this now you're doing the fake ending I'm. 1519 01:18:35,920 --> 01:18:37,760 Really going to end it because I need to piss so bad. 1520 01:18:37,760 --> 01:18:39,880 Do it, man. Do it see you in a? 1521 01:18:39,880 --> 01:18:41,960 Bit cheers in a bit. Take her easy. 1522 01:18:53,850 --> 01:18:55,130 Are you? Recording now, Shane. 1523 01:18:55,570 --> 01:18:57,930 That's us recording. Yes, we are live. 1524 01:18:58,050 --> 01:18:58,730 We're not live.