1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:02,960 I'm Michael. Che and I'm Colin Jose, and 2 00:00:02,960 --> 00:00:05,280 we've got a little secret. Actually, it's a pretty big 3 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:06,480 secret. Well, now you got to give the 4 00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:08,360 people something. I'm not saying a word. 5 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:09,920 Oh, then people will know to tune in. 6 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:12,080 Come on, tell them a little. Like our hosting of comedy 7 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:14,640 events streaming only on Peacock, exactly how it's called 8 00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,200 New York After Dark and it's a comedy show that only features 9 00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:18,960 drop in comic. Boom, you nail. 10 00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:20,360 Into Michael Che's phone. Nervous. 11 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:21,960 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, hey. 12 00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:25,720 New York After Dark. It's some kind of comedy thing, 13 00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:28,000 and it's streaming now only on Peacock. 14 00:00:29,720 --> 00:00:37,440 You love it. Zippers welcome to this episode 15 00:00:37,440 --> 00:00:41,560 of the teams me podcast with me, she and Todd episode number down 16 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:48,600 145 just like that 145 episodes hundreds upon hundreds of hours 17 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:52,440 of talking shit and here we are with my guest Mickey Bartlett. 18 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:56,600 But before we get to the what was the? 19 00:00:56,840 --> 00:01:00,040 Point. We're sponsored by Thompson's 20 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:01,600 Tea. These guys never. 21 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:03,680 Mind them. What about fucking Punjana? 22 00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:05,880 What's the point? Why do you? 23 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:07,840 These are the guys that knock out Punjana. 24 00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:10,440 And why do I hear I'm a Thompson myself? 25 00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:14,880 Oh yeah, Thompson's tea quality. Quality Fuck. 26 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:17,760 Say I come up by edit, that's why I said that and then send 27 00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:21,200 them in. These guys have been, you know, 28 00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:23,360 you know, Punjana, you love it. Snowing Island's number one 29 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:24,880 selling tea. They've been making it sense. 30 00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:27,800 You'll know this. The late when did they start? 31 00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:32,320 They adopt. I believe that one one be. 32 00:01:32,320 --> 00:01:35,000 Invented the bag. Before that it was just hey 33 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:36,600 everywhere and they were like, now I put a wee bag. 34 00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:39,880 Yeah, he started off as a rucksack, actually. 35 00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:41,600 Should just. Change his name to the OG team. 36 00:01:44,760 --> 00:01:48,880 Again, say I said that. So yeah, these guys, but. 37 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:50,800 John, unless I have a podcast as well, call me. 38 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:57,120 Don't edit that out, pyjama. We don't have a desk phone call 39 00:01:57,120 --> 00:02:00,440 for this one of a promo code. Just just keep, just keep doing 40 00:02:00,440 --> 00:02:03,000 what you're doing. Keep drinking it, keep enjoying 41 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:05,280 it. Saw a guy at a shop, yes like 42 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:08,360 literally last night in a spar who let me off the IP bag with a 43 00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:10,919 charging me. So bad news for the environment, 44 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:14,560 good news for the podcast. But just keep drinking Punjana. 45 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:18,080 Since the late 1800s, these guys been run on a boat, you know, 46 00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:20,080 getting up to all sorts, mainly making tea. 47 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:22,000 But the Thompson's family do it all themselves. 48 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:23,920 They taste it by mouth. They taste it on the tea by 49 00:02:23,920 --> 00:02:24,760 mouth. That's handy. 50 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:26,640 Oh, not a lot. A lot of the others died. 51 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:27,760 Yeah. Yeah, right here. 52 00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:29,320 Don't even them lions. Set. 53 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:33,480 Oh, listen. To it sounds fine. 54 00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:38,600 Oh, Tetley snorted. Things I know about them, I 55 00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:40,320 could bring them that whole fucking operation. 56 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:42,200 Do Pyjama love it? Yeah. 57 00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:44,920 We're also sponsored by Manscape. 58 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:49,280 New Year, new year and all that. Me and Mickey were just saying 59 00:02:50,080 --> 00:02:52,440 we need to sort. I need to sort things out and 60 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:54,720 not something like that's conversation. 61 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:58,160 You couldn't have five, 5-10 years with two guys, 2 fellas. 62 00:02:58,160 --> 00:02:59,360 Two comedians don't with their Dicks. 63 00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:05,880 Nah, not not back then. We didn't sort it out. 64 00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:09,320 We need to sort it out. Manscape that. 65 00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,480 You look at those spots on the podcast, since pussy was a 66 00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:13,560 kitten, they've got Paul Clanser. 67 00:03:16,920 --> 00:03:19,760 There was a there was a woman. Whose pussy was a kitten? 68 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:22,040 The Jimmy The Jimmy Savile biography. 69 00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:27,000 Fuck me pussy. Was a kitten now then manscaped. 70 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:30,840 Snoop Dogg was a pup. My. 71 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:34,440 My I used to fix this woman's car. 72 00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:37,240 She was like in her 80s and she would always work in this. 73 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:38,920 I think it was just a fuck would be she'd always work in the 74 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:43,000 sentence since I haven't seen you since pussy was a kid and it 75 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:44,800 was like, I can't say that to me. 76 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:48,320 I used to help me all that. He was in her 80s as well, but 77 00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:52,240 she just said horribly racist things and words left the words. 78 00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:54,480 Yeah, yeah. D. 79 00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:56,440 Yeah, what's bad? Rhymes with barky. 80 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:02,640 Manscape have ball cleanser, ball deodorant, ball wipes, ball 81 00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:05,960 deodorant, ball deodorant shit. Yeah, I'd be in that. 82 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:09,680 My I don't really, I don't think we're I don't think. 83 00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:12,800 But no, I've I've got a situation going on right now 84 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:15,400 like I didn't even ball shit properly. 85 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:17,760 I might go to Turkish guy. I'm. 86 00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:20,560 Actually more 4.2. Yeah, I think 4 is up to four 87 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,800 point. 2 It's a four point after the 3.2, a lot of chat in the 88 00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:25,320 industry was where do you go? Next. 89 00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:27,400 Yeah. Do you order a 3.5 by the way? 90 00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:30,680 Jackass did, Yeah. Or you just go right at the four 91 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:33,200 I heard. That Speaking of us so you're 92 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,200 bottom like. Two does your bottom 2. 93 00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:36,960 Does everything, Mitt. Is there a stickle? 94 00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:41,080 Does your taxes what you know? Like the bomb, the bomb disposal 95 00:04:41,080 --> 00:04:47,160 things. When you're doing your ass is a 96 00:04:47,160 --> 00:04:51,920 beep like a lawyer reversing. What you're asking the masking? 97 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:57,160 Wouldn't that be a print? Sorry, I've done my own for like 98 00:04:57,160 --> 00:05:01,320 2 weeks, but I'm just about you in your bathroom, right? 99 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:06,160 All good, whatever, right? Then you just, I don't know. 100 00:05:06,280 --> 00:05:08,760 It's a good idea. 5 point, have a beep. 101 00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:11,160 Did you just know? Yeah, put one of your arms up, 102 00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:14,600 all right. Killer hooker. 103 00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:21,400 Manscape user called tea with me for 20% off and free shipping. 104 00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:24,520 The links in the bio move into the new year right? 105 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,320 That's not the right way to move into the new year. 106 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:34,440 Manscape sort your whole lot. Exactly. 107 00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:42,920 My guest is probably oh, last. In fact, I said this to you last 108 00:05:42,920 --> 00:05:45,240 time when I was like, who else is like big from Logan? 109 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:47,560 But we worked out at you, Neil Lennon. 110 00:05:47,560 --> 00:05:50,800 Called it off and you know. Political prisoner or? 111 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:56,240 Whatever I think I'm the best at stand up out of those 3, right? 112 00:05:57,320 --> 00:05:59,280 What? What's the What's have you ever 113 00:05:59,280 --> 00:05:59,680 got? We all. 114 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,160 Killed our own fields. Have you ever got anything in 115 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:03,720 Logan? As I can not sure anything on 116 00:06:03,720 --> 00:06:09,080 that field and there's no actual proof that the killing happened 117 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:11,320 there, which is that's what the bodies were right and then call 118 00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:18,400 it off He's the. Last time Patty McDonald was on 119 00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:21,160 the podcast told the story about Neil Lennon, he said Patty said. 120 00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:24,560 Patty said. Let me paraphrase this with 121 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:28,360 Patty, said they. Don't follow me and Patty's 122 00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:30,560 doing. I'm working on a scaffolding up 123 00:06:30,560 --> 00:06:33,280 and fought on twin twin Brooke and then follow me. 124 00:06:33,320 --> 00:06:37,520 That's all party. As he fought on me and him pain 125 00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:40,680 all. That's what Patty not very good. 126 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:43,000 That's more believable. It's actually, yeah, Patty said. 127 00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:45,240 He was at Roy Kane's first match for Celtic and he was giving 128 00:06:45,240 --> 00:06:47,840 Kane a bit of abuse. But two weeks later he met me. 129 00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:49,480 Then I. Don't know. 130 00:06:49,480 --> 00:06:50,600 I just want to say movie jealous. 131 00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:51,920 Sorry. I literally haven't talked 132 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:53,120 anybody into it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 133 00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:57,000 Go ahead. Neither by so he he basically 134 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,800 said that he was giving Kane abuse all much. 135 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,800 And then a couple of weeks later he went to meet Nate Lennon 136 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,440 outside Celtic Park to get a Brookside. 137 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:06,280 And then Neil Lennon was like, and if this happened, it should 138 00:07:06,280 --> 00:07:08,240 be a film. Neil Lennon's like, yeah, mate, 139 00:07:08,240 --> 00:07:09,600 the books in the back of the car. 140 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:12,160 Patty got in. Roy Keane was in the boot, just 141 00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:16,320 got Patty in a headlock from the back seat and said you bet Said 142 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:17,720 you bet. He did say right, right or 143 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:20,800 wrong, he said this. Something along these lines. 144 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:22,200 King got him in the head. I was like. 145 00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,600 Talk to me like that again. Again. 146 00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:28,320 What came from Trinidad and Tobago in there? 147 00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:32,080 You said you're just getting into football like it's a new 148 00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:33,880 thing. Yeah, I bought FIFA because I 149 00:07:33,880 --> 00:07:36,640 don't want to watch football, so I bought FIFA thinking I'm bound 150 00:07:36,640 --> 00:07:39,080 to learn a few players names. But who you trying to impress? 151 00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:43,640 My girlfriend, she's starting to realise I'm not a real man. 152 00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:48,040 I'd be like, I thought. Have you been? 153 00:07:48,080 --> 00:07:49,760 Why have you been on your own for two weeks? 154 00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:52,120 Just Christmas. Just. 155 00:07:52,120 --> 00:07:55,160 Well. Those, yeah, it was just like 156 00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:56,840 because all the was there. I don't know if there's more 157 00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:59,600 restrictions or not, but it just ended up setting them flat like 158 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:02,800 in the flat wasn't really hard. What's the coolest thing you've 159 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:06,200 ever got free in Logan? Because your fame, you ever been 160 00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:08,760 in the shop and got, you know, Mr Bartley, your money's no good 161 00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:11,120 here or. I think maybe the odd pint, 162 00:08:11,120 --> 00:08:14,280 maybe. For as in someone comes up, I 163 00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:15,680 got you this or the bar, the bar. 164 00:08:15,680 --> 00:08:20,480 Don't worry about that. I think that's about it. 165 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,200 There's not really much to get free in Logan. 166 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:25,040 Logan Yeah. Is your car dealership or? 167 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:27,280 No, no, that'll be right. Like I did. 168 00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:29,160 I did go to a car dealership. I don't know, if I was telling 169 00:08:29,160 --> 00:08:30,760 you this, I would say a car dealership. 170 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:33,200 The faggot. Fishing rod. 171 00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:34,919 What? We on the. 172 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:40,760 No, I don't know if I could yes. So basically I'd I've been sent 173 00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:43,600 it for you just on a podcast that after the Oster Hall shows, 174 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:45,360 I was like, I'm going to go straight in our dealership and 175 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:47,320 just buy an Rd. Yes, I was told I was. 176 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:50,760 Buying a fucking Rd and I had grossly misjudged how much I was 177 00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:55,320 getting paid by. Like a lot, I think. 178 00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:57,480 You you, you said it was already used to me. 179 00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:59,480 You were like multiple I think you said. 180 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:02,120 You're just Audi, the whole fucking thing. 181 00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:04,320 I was going to be all first thing. 182 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:06,400 Walksburg and Dirk technique. We're changing that. 183 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:13,040 See them four rings. We'll make one big ring just 184 00:09:13,040 --> 00:09:17,480 back to the car going right but but. 185 00:09:18,360 --> 00:09:21,000 You should work an advertise. First add first add big ring 186 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:23,880 line of coke right then I'm sitting on the bonnet all day. 187 00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:31,280 Get it in the. Dark technique. 188 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:36,920 Yeah, it's Irish. That's just pick up the Quail 189 00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:42,280 talk. But also I've quit smoking. 190 00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:44,880 So I'm now now I no longer have a smoker's cough. 191 00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:47,920 I have my lungs or halen cough. Let me, I want to ask you about 192 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:50,240 that, but what did you do in the car dealership? 193 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:52,360 So gross misjudgements. I was getting paid and then I 194 00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:55,640 thought I'll go in anyway, right, Because I in my head I 195 00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,680 was like, I was going to walk into the Audi dealership and be 196 00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:01,840 like, I've got 30 grand. I'll play with, like to play 197 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:05,280 with. And I didn't like even fucking 198 00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:08,880 nearly have that much right. So it didn't and it was like 199 00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:14,400 like, don't you're like looking at the top of the range one in 200 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:18,240 the shop, like maybe like I was just it was. 201 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:20,160 Just behind the back, yeah. Whistle. 202 00:10:21,560 --> 00:10:22,960 Kick the tyre, Kick the tyre a wee bit. 203 00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:25,120 Not too hard, just. Like check my hair than wearing 204 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:27,080 them. Saying, will she take it? 205 00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:31,880 You don't know what you're doing. 206 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:36,880 You don't know what it is. In my head straight away, it's 207 00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:38,600 almost like Monahan, he takes you through a back door. 208 00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:44,240 There's a woman tied up because again, watching murder 209 00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:46,920 documentaries. But I so basically in my head, I 210 00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:50,840 was going out of dealership of 30 grand to play with and I went 211 00:10:50,840 --> 00:10:53,360 in and I went the guy was like, what do you author is like like 212 00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:59,280 maybe second or third hand. They're a very used and he was 213 00:10:59,280 --> 00:11:04,640 like what sort of budget I went. I've about 8 grand, I still 214 00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:10,400 thought he would go 8 grand and he just looked at me as if to 215 00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:14,880 say so does everybody like I think I was a woman of 34 years. 216 00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:20,120 Major realised all people save. Yeah, yeah, I have no idea. 217 00:11:21,840 --> 00:11:25,720 I have 8 grand to play with. You're not playing with it And 218 00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:28,120 what they was able to help you or did he just advise you to 219 00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:29,480 just. He went, there's a 10 year old 220 00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:32,840 one there for and I was like, oh, think about it, didn't want 221 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:34,320 to admit. You're like, does she take her? 222 00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,160 No, she doesn't. Take it, doesn't take anything, 223 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:41,000 give you an already fucking steering wheel cover if you want 224 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:43,960 to. Do you want a key? 225 00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:49,760 Ring me, man. You're like, no, we'll take a 226 00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:54,440 case. Yeah, I think. 227 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:59,120 I think there's definitely like ways to talk to car dealers. 228 00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:02,240 I I just don't know it like. I don't either, but I think it. 229 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:04,680 Does like I told you before I bought the like the Nissan Duke, 230 00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:07,240 Yeah. And I was like fucking or like 231 00:12:07,440 --> 00:12:08,440 the girl was going with the time. 232 00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:11,520 I was like, you walk and you shut the fuck up, right? 233 00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:17,160 I'm making a deal like I started like playing a blinder and it 234 00:12:17,160 --> 00:12:19,160 would have worked it out. I went, oh, I'm paying 8 grand 235 00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:21,280 more for this car. It's actually worth. 236 00:12:21,320 --> 00:12:23,920 Yeah, yeah, because it was like over a five year period. 237 00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:25,040 Oh yeah, yeah. It was a piece of. 238 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:26,840 Shit, I got in this. You're the Duke. 239 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:28,520 I had a cash case. Yeah, yeah. 240 00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:30,480 And I remember going this. Is an actual car. 241 00:12:31,280 --> 00:12:35,160 Yeah, but it my my dad described I was going to get a Duke and my 242 00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:37,800 dad goes puddle jumper. I don't know what that means. 243 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:40,760 I don't know what that means. And I but I went I guess I know 244 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:42,360 fucks it. I don't know what he's. 245 00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:46,840 Talking about fucking they're shit, they're shit. 246 00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:49,720 But I told him about the time I saw the first time I saw another 247 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:55,120 bloke driving one. I'm aware that each other like I 248 00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:57,840 hate it. I went in to get the cash again 249 00:12:57,840 --> 00:13:00,720 after a gig. Like you say you work. 250 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:06,280 I think when you do big gigs you go there's 3000 people here and 251 00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:11,240 they're paying £20 a ticket, so I get not to multiply those two 252 00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:14,120 and that's what I get and you get nowhere near that. 253 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:18,440 It's it's disgusting. Yeah, like so I went to get this 254 00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:20,600 after a big gig. It was like going to go down 255 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:23,520 Poacher Rd here just fine. And like you say, I've a wee bit 256 00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:27,120 of money to play with. I I had 6 grand to play with 257 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:31,280 just just walking about money, you know, it's just. 258 00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:36,160 Just dropping a ground behind. About your yeah and money clip. 259 00:13:36,640 --> 00:13:39,800 Saw the one I liked the one I wanted go in. 260 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:42,280 I'm like I've just seen documentaries about fucking car 261 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:44,680 salesman. Whatever the price is is not the 262 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:48,480 price. So I go in see this car it was 263 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:51,840 on for 6200. I go mail like it. 264 00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:54,440 This is the one I like it, but I don't like the price. 265 00:13:56,400 --> 00:14:00,400 I like it, but I don't like the price and the guy goes right. 266 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:04,040 He's like to be honest, this is, they have a one called like used 267 00:14:04,040 --> 00:14:07,680 direct church, which is like we're not putting these in any 268 00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:10,800 of our like big dealerships, but this is like the seal section 269 00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:13,280 basically. So I go, I don't like the price. 270 00:14:13,280 --> 00:14:14,960 You'll need to work with me on that. 271 00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:18,680 And he goes, well, this car is priced as low as we physically 272 00:14:18,680 --> 00:14:21,200 can make it. You can see what it's worth. 273 00:14:21,280 --> 00:14:23,880 We're not making much. If we sell it for any, we can't 274 00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:27,240 go any lower. So 6, two, yeah, I was like a 275 00:14:27,240 --> 00:14:28,680 low ball. I'm hearing I offered something 276 00:14:28,680 --> 00:14:33,040 like 1 and he's like he's like that's not anywhere near that 277 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,960 doesn't work. You're supposed to go, yeah. 278 00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:38,960 And then I say he'll say 3 will do a daylight spit in my hand, 279 00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:43,880 his hand, his whatever over and he goes no attest to one of 280 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:53,200 those and didn't like it. He goes no though I can't do 281 00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:56,200 anything on the price. I could do it for 6-2 but I got 282 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:59,480 through in a year's warranty and I said no. 283 00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:03,080 I was like maybe I could go like 3. 284 00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:05,800 He's like I can't, I can only do 62. 285 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:07,480 You are getting a good deal on this. 286 00:15:07,520 --> 00:15:11,400 I know they say that. So I said let me go for a down 287 00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:13,720 there and think about it. Went for a down there, came 288 00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:17,000 back, expected him to be at the showroom door on his knees 289 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,920 please with he goes. Have you had to think about it? 290 00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:22,040 I said could do about I could do four. 291 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:25,640 He goes 62 is all we can do for all right, 6-2. 292 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:29,160 I got 0 money. Off I've had to have to move 293 00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:32,080 with gigs. People go like what you do. 294 00:15:32,760 --> 00:15:34,960 It's a fucking sports dinner or something. 295 00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:37,680 Yeah. And I go £800 and go 4. 296 00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:39,280 What was it? What happened to me with them, 297 00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:46,360 £800 one, right? Did you ever a lot of people, 298 00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:49,760 especially when, you know, before the how like we can speak 299 00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:51,880 to people now and go, could you negotiate that for me or 300 00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:54,680 whatever? Which is great because like, I 301 00:15:54,680 --> 00:15:57,480 think we all hate talking about money and negotiating and all 302 00:15:57,480 --> 00:15:59,440 that sort of thing. Apart from Kieran, obviously, 303 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:06,840 who comes to it. But them the the back in the 304 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:11,840 day, I, my mate Stevie, who like is involved in comedy in the way 305 00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:14,360 I obviously asked him, could I do this? 306 00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:16,400 He said, yeah, of course. I set up an e-mail address in 307 00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:19,800 his name, and I would say to people, I'll get my manager to 308 00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:22,760 e-mail you, or it's just me. And I thought I was the only 309 00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:23,960 person who does that. Man alone. 310 00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,120 To people who've done that. Really. 311 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:27,040 Yeah. I did not do that, yeah. 312 00:16:27,640 --> 00:16:29,880 Like but I start giving him a back story and all that was in 313 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:32,000 his own back story from Paraguay. 314 00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:36,800 Just you with a pencil moustache. 315 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:40,440 Yeah, and the manager used to weirdly, and these guys weirdly 316 00:16:40,440 --> 00:16:42,160 took the deck of balls in between the legs when I was 317 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:44,600 using this e-mail. Tell them stories about your old 318 00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,080 showbiz does. She was the best piece as I ever 319 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:52,960 had. I was booking gigs at the Moulin 320 00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:56,360 Rouge. Barrymore Yeah, I work with both 321 00:16:56,360 --> 00:17:06,040 of them, Joe and Michael. I work with. 322 00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:07,760 Barrymore twins Drew and Michael. 323 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:10,000 He doesn't know anything about Showcase. 324 00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:21,480 Fucking alert. Yeah. 325 00:17:21,520 --> 00:17:27,520 Just really old school stories. I work with Mr Sheen, the Polish 326 00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:29,600 man. Polish. 327 00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:37,400 That's right, they pronounce it over there. 328 00:17:37,760 --> 00:17:40,320 I work all the Sheens. Martin, Charlie. 329 00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:47,520 Mr All of them. With all the sheets. 330 00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:49,720 Martin, Charlie. Mr Vendenma. 331 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,080 Vending machine anyway. Though. 332 00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:00,440 I took a lot. I took a lot of axe to. 333 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:02,840 The all the axe dogs are enough blue. 334 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:06,880 Blazing squad all the. Axe A1. 335 00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:11,080 I fucking I love blazing squad. I like blue. 336 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:14,320 Yeah, blue. But Stevie Wonder? 337 00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:17,920 Remember that. They and they, they, they 338 00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:19,480 delivered. They did one with Elton John 339 00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:20,280 too. Yeah. 340 00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:23,400 Blue were actually really good. Yeah, like really good. 341 00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:25,960 It's July. Every boy went as a secret gang 342 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:26,960 member. Yeah. 343 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,520 I was surprised when it was Duncan. 344 00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:30,320 Really. Yeah. 345 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:33,040 I wasn't. I I really was, I thought. 346 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:35,800 Fucking surprise. Right who? 347 00:18:35,800 --> 00:18:38,720 Who's your money? On Lee, Yeah. 348 00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:42,320 Nah. Julius, Julius. 349 00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:45,320 Well, Simon Webb. Simon Webb didn't get the credit 350 00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:47,400 somewhere about a great voice and a great look. 351 00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,040 Oh my God, the body. Sound like a pop star. 352 00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:50,320 Looked like a pop star. Pop star. 353 00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:52,640 Yeah, I understood. And then we Anthony Costa. 354 00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:54,680 Bless him. Yeah, bless him. 355 00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:56,520 Lovely voice. Voice of an Angel. 356 00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:57,880 Yeah. Face of A. 357 00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:01,240 He by the way, he's been to say you do stand up and that word 358 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:05,800 remember, yeah, bollocks, Edinburgh French find me the 359 00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:07,840 funny he was in the audio. Book. 360 00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:11,360 Yeah. You that you should tell people 361 00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:14,000 that more Anthony Foster's seen you just. 362 00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:17,040 To do the girl who played Emily and friends. 363 00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:20,920 Oh yeah, I showed that the French and it was the last 364 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:23,440 Tuesday at the Fringe, which is where I historically do it. 365 00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:27,160 Blocked. And I died on my whole, like I 366 00:19:27,160 --> 00:19:29,120 didn't realise she was there until I'd seen her leaving the 367 00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:32,840 room, like very, very drunk. I'm saying that a few 368 00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:36,080 celebrities down, Rachel. I mean Emily. 369 00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:43,000 Tony Costa. Antonio Costa. 370 00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:45,120 I think he's something to do with a coffee. 371 00:19:49,520 --> 00:19:53,640 You're going to be a huge kid. You got you're going to be as 372 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:56,800 big as Billy Piper. I work with all the pipers. 373 00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:58,120 Billy Rowdy. Rowdy. 374 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:02,320 You're going to be as big as Billy and I did, Piper. 375 00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:05,760 Yeah, he's just that he's booking us for local gigs, you 376 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,440 know, which doesn't work in that voice. 377 00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:10,160 I'm getting I'm getting you 20 minutes at the front page of 378 00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:16,520 Ballymena. All right, all the. 379 00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:19,520 Greats who played there. You're playing twice in your 380 00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:22,480 career, wasn't the way up, wasn't the way down and you baby 381 00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:32,480 are on the way up. I got to do a warm up for Nolan, 382 00:20:35,480 --> 00:20:36,960 then we're going to record a show. 383 00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:41,360 Where is it, baby? No, no, no. 384 00:20:41,360 --> 00:20:48,680 You misunderstood. Colleen, it's never it's never 385 00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:50,960 the gig you think. Never the gig, you think? 386 00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:55,680 I got you the new movie directed by Nolan. 387 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:02,600 You're playing them in a biopic, kid. 388 00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:07,520 You're. Going to need a game 570 lbs by 389 00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:14,640 Tuesday. We're. 390 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:17,640 Talking brand deals Sookie Bell Farm. 391 00:21:18,120 --> 00:21:21,560 You're going to be in the new Welsh movie Irvin no Deniz. 392 00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:30,640 So why'd you quit smoking? Just a second up because Mr Ass 393 00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:34,240 is going out as well so. The smoking can be linked to it. 394 00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:35,640 Yeah, well, don't help, obviously. 395 00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:37,560 Yeah, it doesn't help. But see, when you smile, I think 396 00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:41,480 about this recently. When you smoke, there's you. 397 00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:45,520 Just peeing goes always. Smoke in your body, but imagine 398 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,280 you were in a burning room. I get out of no problem. 399 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:51,640 But with that. I just walk out of a formally 400 00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:53,960 burning room but I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 401 00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:58,680 Doing those things. We Yeah. 402 00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:06,040 Like Gandalf make a boat knob. Can you do some? 403 00:22:06,040 --> 00:22:07,960 What do you do? Smoke or you do those rings. 404 00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,960 I could do you could do 1 ring right? 405 00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:12,040 Because my girl, well. That's I'm not so yeah, in the 406 00:22:12,120 --> 00:22:14,480 earlier. Exactly, I'm just smoking. 407 00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:17,840 May stand the bug. Bad for. 408 00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:22,520 You. My my girlfriend got me bought 409 00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,760 me cigars for Christmas. Right for. 410 00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:26,120 Whatever reason, I do not know to. 411 00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,640 Help you quit smoking. No, just she was just like, I 412 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,200 don't know. I honestly don't know why she 413 00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:32,840 got them. Did you ever get a present? 414 00:22:32,840 --> 00:22:38,800 You're like, thanks, I'd made her transpired. 415 00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:41,000 She likes smoking cigars and she's had a couple of drinks 416 00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:43,640 which I didn't know. So New Year's Eve, we didn't go 417 00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:47,040 out and I'm just looking at my quite stunning girlfriend in her 418 00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:49,440 pyjama was just smoking a big fuck. 419 00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:53,640 Merry Christmas, sweetheart. Hey, where you want to go? 420 00:22:54,160 --> 00:23:00,480 The top. You don't know Christmas light 421 00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:08,200 switch on kid and money Ray. How do you get the Carnegie Hall 422 00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:10,160 practise? No, it's in Ballymena. 423 00:23:13,280 --> 00:23:15,120 You're opening for Maliki Kushka. 424 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:19,320 You're welcome. You also got to give him a lift. 425 00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,440 I got to get out of here now. I got to go get Eamon Holmes, 426 00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:27,760 Yale. I mean, y'all play it. 427 00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:39,880 I don't know, like I Remember, Remember my granny was going to 428 00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:43,080 give up thanks when she was in her 80s and the doctor went 429 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:45,240 don't because I'll be bad for you. 430 00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:47,320 I've that's happened to a friend of mine's dad. 431 00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:51,520 He had he had a heart attack, I think, and he was actually 432 00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:52,720 stopped smoking or the doctor was gone. 433 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:56,800 Not yet, because you can the stress of quitting cigarette 434 00:23:56,800 --> 00:24:00,240 smoking if you, if you're a heavy smoker, apparently can 435 00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:02,200 like fucking. Well, your body's probably 436 00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:04,480 dealing with that. Yeah, I'm not worried about the 437 00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:06,400 recovery for. Yeah, I was like, but see, to be 438 00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:08,120 honest. When when did you start smoking 439 00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,400 like when you was? Like 19 or 20 like I was. 440 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:11,400 Oh, really? Yeah, it was. 441 00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:13,920 A unique thing. Yeah, I think it was when the 442 00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:17,080 smoking ban came in and then everybody was like going outside 443 00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:18,920 the smoking have a bit of. Crack on. 444 00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:20,360 The coolest people. We're standing like there. 445 00:24:20,360 --> 00:24:22,600 Yeah, and all those nerds inside of the glass. 446 00:24:22,960 --> 00:24:24,000 What are you talking about? I know. 447 00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:28,200 We're all smell the passion there, like I ever trying to 448 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:30,640 like the girl I fancy don't know, she smoked and I was like 449 00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:35,000 I'm going to go here and have a fag as embarrassing as fuck. 450 00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:37,360 She'd give me a cigarette, but she was reagent. 451 00:24:37,360 --> 00:24:41,920 She had to do it like skint and like sound smoking, trying to be 452 00:24:41,920 --> 00:24:42,880 all cool. And then I thought, right, I'll 453 00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:46,440 flick this cigarette like dead cools and walking back in and I 454 00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:48,040 fumbled it and I would end of my sleeve. 455 00:24:48,040 --> 00:24:55,760 I was just like, but yeah, so just a month, right? 456 00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:56,920 Haven't drank in five weeks either. 457 00:24:57,240 --> 00:24:58,880 Do. You are you fucking happy? 458 00:24:59,120 --> 00:25:01,680 Oh, you every day, like I want a cigarette. 459 00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:04,920 No, to be weird because Colin get us quit. 460 00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:06,160 I remember when he quit. Yeah. 461 00:25:06,360 --> 00:25:08,440 And it was just, like I said, as a killing. 462 00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:10,760 I can remember we're sitting around two people smoking or 463 00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,080 something. I was like, is that really 464 00:25:12,080 --> 00:25:13,680 difficult for you? Is like, no, no, I'm just often. 465 00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:17,200 See what's really strange was like after about I think 2 weeks 466 00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:21,240 I was in a shopping centre with my girlfriend and walked outside 467 00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:24,200 and smelt someone smoking a cigarette from like fucking 468 00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:26,720 miles away. Yeah, and I was like, that's 469 00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:29,280 disgusting. Do you tell them he berated the 470 00:25:29,280 --> 00:25:32,160 person you are? You're worse than a fucking 471 00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:33,120 pedo. Do you know what? 472 00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:35,920 But on face we're not see he's fucking smokers. 473 00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:42,160 They're fucking disgusting. But I piece of pest. 474 00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:44,640 I never thought I was never that heavy a smoker. 475 00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:46,840 Yeah. But when you. 476 00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:49,240 Started gagging or. Yeah, it was digging or drinking 477 00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:52,680 like if I was like, it's it's still my favourite thing the 478 00:25:52,680 --> 00:25:54,760 world sit in a beer garden with like 20 cigarettes and just 479 00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:56,800 fucking. You can't smoke and walk, so you 480 00:25:56,800 --> 00:25:57,600 can't. Walk now. 481 00:25:58,160 --> 00:25:59,760 That's one that. You know it doesn't suit you 482 00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:00,480 when? You die. 483 00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:02,440 That will be one of the things I describe. 484 00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:04,280 I describe used to other people, I'll say. 485 00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,560 Great comedian, couldn't smoke and walk people like what? 486 00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:10,560 Because I've seen you have to do it and you can't see your brain. 487 00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:11,320 You can't do both. It's. 488 00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:12,680 Because whatever. Way I walk, really. 489 00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:15,680 Whatever way I learned inhale, I inhale like that for some 490 00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:17,040 reason. So I use my tongue. 491 00:26:17,040 --> 00:26:20,960 I know oral fixation. And so yeah, I can never smoke 492 00:26:20,960 --> 00:26:22,120 and walk. But you can still use your 493 00:26:22,120 --> 00:26:23,800 tongue and walk, no? But. 494 00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:29,320 You're acting like you're acting like you can't walk and smoke 495 00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:31,480 because you need to stop. Do what I guess. 496 00:26:31,920 --> 00:26:34,800 No, I think because like there's there's people I see smoking 497 00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:37,800 cigarettes and they inhale without there's no and that's 498 00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:39,880 cornered their nose. Yeah, yeah, I have to do a bag 499 00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:41,240 like fucking. Right. 500 00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:43,800 A long and heal. There was a. 501 00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:47,200 There's times I'm not even going to say do and heal cigarettes. 502 00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:49,040 I'm like, I've definitely been smoking wrong. 503 00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:52,640 Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do all the classic things, 504 00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:56,080 like I probably smoked the equivalent of a cigarette in my 505 00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:58,000 whole life, like the old drawer here and now. 506 00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:00,480 I was younger and I remember starting tech. 507 00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:04,080 I mean, there was a guy, Mike, and there was a guy in our 508 00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:07,520 course who's like really cool. He was like a rocker and he was 509 00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:09,920 few years older than us. And I was like, that's that's 510 00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:10,560 what I want. That's. 511 00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:11,120 What? It was a rock. 512 00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:13,080 That's what I want. When did you go to tech in 74? 513 00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:17,160 We were. Mods, we couldn't talk to him. 514 00:27:18,560 --> 00:27:24,560 Well, I just got my first real 6 string and it was the summer of 515 00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:29,480 nine. It was the summer of 09. 516 00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:32,840 And yeah, this guy named King, I was like, he's fucking really 517 00:27:32,840 --> 00:27:35,600 cool. Like and I you know, I'm wearing 518 00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:38,440 exactly what we're now tracksuit bottoms in a fucking sports top 519 00:27:38,440 --> 00:27:40,520 with a 16 year old. Now he was smoking at the front 520 00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:44,520 of Belfast Mint and I said here goes eh L dieser. 521 00:27:44,640 --> 00:27:47,040 He's like what I thought everyone I was like, oh, last 522 00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:51,720 draws took one really wet it smoked it totally wrong again, 523 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,320 like you probably went to flick it or do something. 524 00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:56,600 And I said because he was really in the Slipknot and what's a 525 00:27:56,600 --> 00:28:00,080 good Slipknot album like entry level to like to get in. 526 00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:02,720 And he was like, I don't know, you probably you wouldn't like 527 00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:04,040 it. I was like, all right man, I 528 00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:06,840 don't think I ever talked to him after that in the whole 2 years 529 00:28:06,840 --> 00:28:10,840 of the course. It's it's, I hate smoking like I 530 00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:11,440 don't. I love it. 531 00:28:11,440 --> 00:28:13,120 I miss it. Now that we're talking. 532 00:28:13,120 --> 00:28:14,560 About you'll ever smoke a cigarette again. 533 00:28:15,920 --> 00:28:18,560 I'll probably when I'm blocked some night over I guess why I'm 534 00:28:18,920 --> 00:28:24,360 yeah like Gavin and Stacey all at the back yeah but yeah I just 535 00:28:24,440 --> 00:28:27,000 I just really went off very strange. 536 00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:28,200 It's. Weird. 537 00:28:29,120 --> 00:28:33,280 It's weird for me to see I'm I'm never around smoking. 538 00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:35,280 Yeah, ever. So that's like, neither was I 539 00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:37,120 like nobody else my family smokes or anything. 540 00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:42,040 But it was. Yeah, I was just kidding. 541 00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:44,720 I think it got the point where it was like having to go outside 542 00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:46,840 to smoke in the winter. Just a pain in the hole. 543 00:28:46,840 --> 00:28:50,320 Yeah, and Gagans become difficult because with stand up, 544 00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:53,440 you know, it was a lot more like laid back. 545 00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:56,720 People were hanging out before the show, we're hanging out 546 00:28:56,720 --> 00:28:59,120 after. And now I like doing stand up 547 00:28:59,120 --> 00:29:01,000 beds, like being like a bomb disposal expert. 548 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:04,360 You like, you get like shipped in, you do your set, you're like 549 00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:06,080 straight home. You don't really interact with 550 00:29:06,080 --> 00:29:07,680 anyone else. So it doesn't really lend itself 551 00:29:07,680 --> 00:29:09,520 to that. Exactly, that is one thing I've 552 00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:11,160 noticed with being the gigs being back. 553 00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:14,320 Yeah, was it was the social aspect of it definitely had 554 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:16,240 ships, even libraries like everyone sit in different. 555 00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:18,120 Corners, yeah, and you're like ships in the night with the 556 00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,560 other comedians. Like also what's good as well is 557 00:29:20,840 --> 00:29:22,600 people are doing other gigs on the same night. 558 00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:25,480 So you're maybe only there for your set and then you've got to 559 00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:28,240 go somewhere else. But I'm, I don't know, I think 560 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:31,720 some people are just, and I totally get it, like taking a 561 00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:36,280 bit of a back seat with gigs and not going out to perform because 562 00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:38,360 you know, you're saying you don't know what the regulations 563 00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:40,320 were over Christmas. I didn't really either. 564 00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:43,520 And I was like, maybe I'm not going to do any gigs. 565 00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:47,920 And then two people dropped out of two gigs in Mercury's in Yuri 566 00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:52,240 and Crumlin getting Crumlin and and I got asked to them like 567 00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:54,840 last minute. And I like I'd have done any gig 568 00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:58,040 between Christmas and New Year, just bored and wanting to keep 569 00:29:58,080 --> 00:30:01,040 being sharp and go out. But it definitely is like a 570 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:04,640 different experience. But actually an audiences are at 571 00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:07,760 like the bet in the 14 years old. 572 00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:10,720 Yeah, really nice audiences are their best night because people 573 00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:13,680 are so appreciative of just being there and watching it. 574 00:30:13,800 --> 00:30:17,800 I I think it's like the, yeah, well, I heard Colin was talking 575 00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,160 about like his sort of bigger ones because I left the SSA 576 00:30:21,880 --> 00:30:25,040 early before like, oh, he had the cold and then Cosmos gems 577 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:27,040 going nuts, just went home. Yeah, but then he had to throw 578 00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:29,240 people out or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 579 00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:31,160 Front row. Because he tends to get at his 580 00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:34,760 big shows, not kisses. Yeah, here. 581 00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:36,960 Like, don't go out all year. And then they're like, right, 582 00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:39,720 let's take a gramme. Yeah, H. 583 00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:43,080 Spice. Yeah, like, and just see what 584 00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:45,640 happens. Yeah, but you're right. 585 00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:47,880 Like there hasn't even been. I don't think I've been hackled. 586 00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:51,920 No, we've been back yet. No, and it's and it's also rooms 587 00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:56,320 of like that one in Crumlin, they never had stand up before. 588 00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:58,680 You could tell a lot of people hadn't been to a stand up night 589 00:30:58,680 --> 00:31:01,160 before and that's usually disaster like worst case 590 00:31:01,160 --> 00:31:03,960 scenario. And they were a bit lively but 591 00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:07,160 not rowdy and not disruptive. Yeah, some people were like 592 00:31:07,600 --> 00:31:09,120 talking out but then know not to. 593 00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:11,920 But it was actually like good-natured and stuff, and they 594 00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:13,280 weren't like continually doing it. 595 00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:16,000 Those were two of the best gigs I've done. 596 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:18,880 I think there's a thing, maybe it's us as well. 597 00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:20,880 We're like, because we've been off it for so long with all the 598 00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:24,800 lockdowns that even people talking is like, I don't care. 599 00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:27,920 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you mean. 600 00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:30,640 That's you. Before you would try and get the 601 00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:33,520 atmosphere to be exactly the way it should be. 602 00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:35,720 Like everyone quiet, keep your phone out. 603 00:31:35,760 --> 00:31:38,760 If someone had their phone out, text and you'd be out for fuck 604 00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:39,720 sake. No, it's like. 605 00:31:39,880 --> 00:31:41,840 But I think the phone thing as well has just changed over the 606 00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:43,840 years. Now it's like you're just used 607 00:31:43,840 --> 00:31:46,400 to people. Yeah, I didn't. 608 00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:47,120 We don't know. We get it. 609 00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:49,000 Instrument. No, I'm doing it this month. 610 00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,520 It's fucking great, yeah. But there was one that I did. 611 00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:54,120 There was a woman. And it's such a small room, like 612 00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,320 it's the size of this room. Yeah, Yeah. 613 00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:58,240 And there's a woman sitting just recording the whole thing. 614 00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:01,120 And I'm like, I can fucking touch your fringe from here. 615 00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:02,400 I can go like that. And you're. 616 00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:06,280 Yeah, I I call it video stuff. I make a bit of a joke or it, 617 00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:09,320 but then try and get them put the photo like no bother. 618 00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:13,000 But the video stuff, yeah, it's like you will inevitably put up 619 00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:14,960 a clip where I'm setting up a bit. 620 00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:16,480 Yeah. So there's not really any laughs 621 00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:16,840 in it. There's. 622 00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,280 Always. There's never a bit on Instagram 623 00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:24,120 where it's like, yeah, like. It's a 5 second video you and or 624 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:25,280 it's coming off the back of a laugh. 625 00:32:25,720 --> 00:32:28,720 So you're like, but yeah, you know, the world is it's pretty 626 00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:30,840 mad at the minute, you know, and that's the clip. 627 00:32:31,080 --> 00:32:33,600 Yeah, that's the clip. And people watch them and like, 628 00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:34,960 oh fuck, those gigs don't look good. 629 00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:37,960 Yeah, it's the same or even like I've seen people recording just 630 00:32:38,080 --> 00:32:43,760 loads of it on Snapchat and I'm like none of your myth give a 631 00:32:43,760 --> 00:32:45,800 fuck. Yeah, I don't think any of your 632 00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:47,720 friends are in the house. Get a Snapchat from you. 633 00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:49,480 And it's fucking me. And they're like. 634 00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:52,880 Oh. Connect Connect the phone to the 635 00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,760 TV. Well, see fucking 4 seconds of 636 00:32:55,760 --> 00:32:57,440 Mickey Barton stand up with a rainbow in his mouth. 637 00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:03,920 I did that the I did that gig in in Yuri Mccurry had done before. 638 00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:05,600 Have you? Yeah, that's really good. 639 00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:07,040 You just go to the classroom. Really good. 640 00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:10,920 And there's a guy and it's it's again, rooms with the size this. 641 00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:14,400 And I get up and there's a guy literally like this phone, like 642 00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:17,360 he's like 2 rows back and he's got the phone recording, big 643 00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:19,560 sort of smile on his face. And I before I say anything to 644 00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:22,280 him, he goes, I'm coming to see you in July. 645 00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:26,000 And I said you're seeing me now. You're seeing me now to me. 646 00:33:26,080 --> 00:33:28,240 So don't worry about that. Like I'm here. 647 00:33:28,280 --> 00:33:31,880 Yeah, I had a guy take a photo of me playing an arcade machine 648 00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:36,000 and fucking Coleraine right before right before Christmas 649 00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:38,480 and put it on my Facebook like a fucking threat. 650 00:33:38,920 --> 00:33:42,800 Like because it was me and my girlfriend went to the Jet 651 00:33:42,800 --> 00:33:44,640 Centre in Korean. What are they? 652 00:33:44,640 --> 00:33:47,160 What are they out? You treat her right. 653 00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:50,840 Mate, you treat me. She played a fucking blinder. 654 00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:51,880 Haven't told us in the podcast yet. 655 00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:53,760 We went to there's a Chinese place in there. 656 00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:57,840 Right food or just it's. Just a place you just take your 657 00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:02,640 shoes off and there's meander. But no, it's going to be weird. 658 00:34:02,960 --> 00:34:04,280 Chinese restaurant. Chinese restaurant. 659 00:34:04,480 --> 00:34:06,680 Yeah, in the Jet Centre. Yeah, Yoga. 660 00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:11,800 What's called after owner? I think I said you go. 661 00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:16,800 I was like, well. So you go dumb, but it's one of 662 00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:23,600 those Yoko Duncan skinny re eye to DD re eye. 663 00:34:25,480 --> 00:34:27,120 If you pay attention, I swap the else for ours. 664 00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:34,520 They're racist. But Basil was like we're sitting 665 00:34:35,239 --> 00:34:38,600 and eating better, but as soon as we got in, so it's like the 666 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:40,840 start playing happy birthday over the speakers and some guys 667 00:34:40,840 --> 00:34:43,280 getting a fucking, you know, a brownie with a candle and I was 668 00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:46,280 like I hit that like that really bugged the shit out of me. 669 00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:49,320 A few seconds later happened the game and I'm like, fuck, that's 670 00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:50,760 two people in here Lexus with us. 671 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:52,840 I fucking that really pisses me off. 672 00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:57,000 And then it happened 1/3 time and I'm like I sort of fuck and 673 00:34:57,240 --> 00:34:59,440 then my girl was like I just need to go like go pay. 674 00:34:59,760 --> 00:35:03,160 She went to the toilet, came back and I'm sitting I hear like 675 00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:06,080 happy birthday. I looked at her and she was 676 00:35:06,080 --> 00:35:11,200 like, but as I was saying the words, that's the 4th fucking 677 00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:12,600 time. And then I felt the heat of the 678 00:35:12,600 --> 00:35:16,160 candle and I was like, you fucking bitch and she should 679 00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:18,160 plan it three weeks in advance and settled. 680 00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:19,800 And I've never been more proud of her. 681 00:35:19,800 --> 00:35:21,400 Who's your birthday? No, my birthday is March. 682 00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:27,640 She's just a cunt. Here, what else is in the Jet 683 00:35:27,640 --> 00:35:29,360 Centre? I thought Jen said. 684 00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:30,560 Just like. Fucking mad and. 685 00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:34,960 Chinese and like. Chinese restaurant, big arcade 686 00:35:34,960 --> 00:35:40,040 and cinemas bone all as well. That's class EU money. 687 00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:42,880 See places like a like you need. I love. 688 00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:44,760 EU Money is my rap name by the. Way EU money. 689 00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:49,840 I made that up. I just like big fun. 690 00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:52,640 Places. Big fun centre. 691 00:35:52,640 --> 00:35:56,680 There's a big, Craigavon has one like, no, there's a whole run on 692 00:35:56,680 --> 00:35:58,600 them, but they've all got the same sort of logos. 693 00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:02,960 And they all have those American restaurant like Buffalo Jacks. 694 00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:07,760 And yeah, fucking caught my fucking bills or whatever. 695 00:36:08,160 --> 00:36:12,240 But yeah, there's big arcade and they've got like AI think 696 00:36:12,240 --> 00:36:14,120 they've got like a trampoline. Please look like an air tastic 697 00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:16,400 table that you. Do you like to just? 698 00:36:16,480 --> 00:36:18,640 Do you like that fun? Yeah, I love having fun. 699 00:36:19,560 --> 00:36:21,960 I'm a big baller for me. How much fun? 700 00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:24,880 How many like I would have? I went there roller rink for 701 00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:26,280 every Friday night for six weeks. 702 00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:28,480 That's right as, and that was not that long ago, you were an 703 00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:30,320 adult man. We go roller skating and go to 704 00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:32,960 the pub. It's fucking great, fucking 705 00:36:32,960 --> 00:36:35,680 great. Don't judge me, I don't care. 706 00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:37,120 I love. Did you did you get good at 707 00:36:37,120 --> 00:36:39,080 roller skating? Bleeding man, I'm a bleeder. 708 00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:40,160 All right. Sorry. 709 00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,640 Yeah, Yeah. Skating's for twerps. 710 00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:45,920 I always like the energy of speed skaters when you went ice 711 00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:47,080 skating. But yeah, do you remember this? 712 00:36:47,080 --> 00:36:50,000 There was like there were, there was half an hour where everyone 713 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:52,240 had to just wait and it was only the speed skaters. 714 00:36:52,360 --> 00:36:54,480 I know every time I went to ice skate the result was someone 715 00:36:54,480 --> 00:36:56,120 practising figures getting in the middle of the rink. 716 00:36:57,240 --> 00:36:59,240 There was this middle age, I think this guy used to do it in 717 00:36:59,240 --> 00:37:01,960 the Donald ice ball and he would really put his arms into it too. 718 00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:04,280 Yeah, well, that happened in the fucking roller rink place I was 719 00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:07,080 going to in Portadown maybe. It seemed there was like there 720 00:37:07,080 --> 00:37:08,840 was this girl was doing this like sort of sexy. 721 00:37:10,040 --> 00:37:12,680 Get maybe at the roll rink and poured it down. 722 00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:19,320 I got an idea for sure. We're shooting the music video. 723 00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,320 I'm. Trying to take my second name. 724 00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:24,440 I'm walking with your Uncle Hugo, trying to get him into the 725 00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:28,760 Chinese cuisine. We shoot the music video from 726 00:37:28,760 --> 00:37:31,320 McCartney, Paul no, my friend Davey. 727 00:37:36,760 --> 00:37:38,400 He's got a song about the Billy Boys. 728 00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:44,920 You're opening form. What in the last like in the 729 00:37:45,120 --> 00:37:49,080 because you me definitely since standard was allowed back in any 730 00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:51,240 form went straight back. Yeah. 731 00:37:51,240 --> 00:37:53,640 And I've probably done them, probably done the most shows. 732 00:37:54,280 --> 00:37:58,040 Yeah, probably. Most gigs, but what was the best 733 00:37:58,040 --> 00:38:03,000 in the last say, year that you that you did you're in Oster 734 00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:04,960 Hall was your. Yeah, second night in Oster Hall 735 00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:11,360 was fucking brilliant thought. Well, I think like did a couple 736 00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:14,520 of the weekend at The Stand and Newcastle and Glasgow. 737 00:38:15,280 --> 00:38:16,880 Glasgow was potentially my favourite. 738 00:38:17,240 --> 00:38:18,520 Newcastle, I don't fucking Britain. 739 00:38:18,600 --> 00:38:21,840 Great time in Newcastle. Like the first time. 740 00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:24,040 The first gig we did of Victoria was back garden. 741 00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:27,560 See him one of the best. Yeah, like fucking brilliant. 742 00:38:27,720 --> 00:38:31,400 I think I did the second one of those and it was my first time 743 00:38:31,400 --> 00:38:33,960 back on a stage for however long. 744 00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:38,480 And he said do 20, but if you're enjoying it, do whatever. 745 00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:40,040 Yeah, I did like 45. I was. 746 00:38:40,120 --> 00:38:42,680 All new man, I was, I walked. I was exactly the same. 747 00:38:42,680 --> 00:38:44,720 Walked off like 45 minutes and new stuff. 748 00:38:44,720 --> 00:38:47,560 Yeah. And there was a point where I 749 00:38:47,560 --> 00:38:50,960 because I recorded it and there's a point I'd cover what 750 00:38:50,960 --> 00:38:54,360 the joke was. But people laugh for 45 seconds. 751 00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:56,400 Yeah. And I was like, fucking hell, 752 00:38:56,400 --> 00:38:58,040 I'm a genius. Because that was the. 753 00:38:58,040 --> 00:38:59,360 I've done the same joke a million times since. 754 00:38:59,360 --> 00:39:00,920 It never happened again. I think it was just people were 755 00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:04,080 so glad to be out. That atmosphere, because it was 756 00:39:04,080 --> 00:39:07,000 a summer night, it was outside, you're back on stage, it's in 757 00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,840 someone's garden. That was like the best awards. 758 00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:13,680 Yeah, because I did a exactly like I did a bit that was brand 759 00:39:13,680 --> 00:39:16,240 new about. But the Bible, the monks that 760 00:39:16,240 --> 00:39:19,560 like transcribe the Bible, I thought this is the best, this 761 00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:21,720 is the best bit that I've ever written or done. 762 00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:24,320 And I did it and it was a wee bit like all over the place, but 763 00:39:24,480 --> 00:39:27,320 it was great. And then I thought like this, 764 00:39:27,520 --> 00:39:28,920 this is the main bit of the show. 765 00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:32,960 Then for the tour and all that sort of thing, it never worked 766 00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:34,440 again. I might actually give it another 767 00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:37,440 go because I think there's something in it, but I think 768 00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:38,840 it's been too many where it's been. 769 00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:40,480 There's nothing more frustrating when you go. 770 00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:43,200 I know this has worked, especially when it works the 771 00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:44,320 first time and it never works again. 772 00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:46,880 It's definitely doesn't work and then you get it to work. 773 00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:50,680 A lot of the time I find that to be like a story when you retell 774 00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:54,920 a story because you're so giddy about telling the story and 775 00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:56,720 you're finding funny, but. And the more times you try and 776 00:39:56,720 --> 00:39:58,920 replicate that, yeah, the harder it is. 777 00:39:58,920 --> 00:39:59,840 I. Remember the day that? 778 00:39:59,840 --> 00:40:00,880 Do you remember the bit I used to? 779 00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:04,800 How about going to the top man? And the woman thought I worked. 780 00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:07,000 There I was my I used to all I used to ask you to do. 781 00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:09,320 If we went to gigs, I would say please do that bit. 782 00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:10,360 I. Remember, there was just a day I 783 00:40:10,360 --> 00:40:11,880 just stopped working. Just one night. 784 00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:13,640 It just didn't and it never worked. 785 00:40:13,640 --> 00:40:15,400 Again, it was Maybe you just don't want too. 786 00:40:15,400 --> 00:40:17,640 Many, yeah, I don't know what happened and I've I've tried to 787 00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:20,760 bring it back like years later, yeah. 788 00:40:20,760 --> 00:40:22,360 And people are just like, I don't believe you. 789 00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:25,240 It didn't happen like. It I used to. 790 00:40:25,760 --> 00:40:28,560 I love when you have a bit of someone's that you go please do 791 00:40:28,560 --> 00:40:31,400 that bit, Paddy Migaki's UTV bit. 792 00:40:32,520 --> 00:40:34,440 Paddy Mcgackie's weather. Watchers, weather watchers. 793 00:40:34,600 --> 00:40:35,800 I'm like, yeah, every time. Like. 794 00:40:35,960 --> 00:40:41,920 Please, I love his American sports. 795 00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:43,080 Oh. You're in the 45. 796 00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:45,680 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or the thing about the mental 797 00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:50,200 health turning into the pool. Oh yeah, fuck yeah, the plate of 798 00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:51,680 sandwiches. Jesus Christ. 799 00:40:51,680 --> 00:40:53,560 Yeah. I did, I tell him we did that 800 00:40:53,560 --> 00:40:57,040 gag in Larne like. Oh, the outdoor one. 801 00:40:57,040 --> 00:40:58,360 Yeah, yeah. Most been September time or 802 00:40:58,360 --> 00:41:03,640 something and I was like, because I think Tim was our Tim 803 00:41:03,640 --> 00:41:05,200 and I think Tim had seen this at where I don't. 804 00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:07,080 Have you done that bit? There's a bunch of people sort 805 00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:09,320 of sitting around watching it and his party started that bit. 806 00:41:09,320 --> 00:41:11,440 I started running the spot like he's folk could do it. 807 00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:14,360 And everybody was like, what do you what the what the fuck? 808 00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:17,800 Yeah, and it went all right. But so you could hear like the 809 00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:22,920 audience going like, and then me going ha ha, kick and walk. 810 00:41:23,080 --> 00:41:25,320 Do you know what was it? Highlight as well was the 811 00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:28,160 Rathman Island Comedy Festival that we did in Valley Castle. 812 00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:30,640 Again, That's that. Was a bit, yeah, that was a 813 00:41:30,640 --> 00:41:34,040 weird one where like the IT was, it was very strange work because 814 00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:35,280 we had the two days. Yeah. 815 00:41:35,920 --> 00:41:38,480 So I opened the first day, I closed the second day and it was 816 00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:41,800 very fuck. This is a traditional, not 817 00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:45,120 sorry, traditional in the sense that it was hard to go on 1st 818 00:41:45,120 --> 00:41:47,760 and then they're warmed up. Yeah, I find exactly. 819 00:41:47,760 --> 00:41:51,360 Pretty much seems that yeah, like as in the first part of the 820 00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:52,920 second spot. Yeah, for anyone who doesn't 821 00:41:52,920 --> 00:41:56,040 know, we were supposed to do a gig on Rathlin Island, which is 822 00:41:56,040 --> 00:41:59,040 off the coast of Ballycastle. I've done it before. 823 00:41:59,400 --> 00:42:02,920 It was all booked, ferries all booked, accommodation sorted and 824 00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:06,480 then the weather, people just went, there's going to be a 825 00:42:06,480 --> 00:42:11,520 storm, as in like a storm. And we moved it last minute to a 826 00:42:11,520 --> 00:42:14,800 hotel in Ballycastle and the weather was fucking. 827 00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:15,600 Gorgeous. Yeah. 828 00:42:16,240 --> 00:42:18,720 It was me it would. Every one of us drove and then 829 00:42:18,720 --> 00:42:20,080 was like. Yeah. 830 00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:23,200 All the pack. Like how good would the chippy 831 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,280 though? Yeah, it's about Chappies class 832 00:42:25,280 --> 00:42:27,160 and Bali Castle. Chappies that's had a few shout 833 00:42:27,200 --> 00:42:30,480 outs in the podcast. Yeah, it's a big, big fun. 834 00:42:30,640 --> 00:42:33,600 Yeah, it's. What's the furthest you have you 835 00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:35,960 ever drip? Is there like a particular food 836 00:42:35,960 --> 00:42:39,960 that you like that you've driven a weird amount of time to go and 837 00:42:39,960 --> 00:42:42,000 get? You know, is there a wee 838 00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:45,040 speciality you like somewhere that you'd be prepared to travel 839 00:42:45,040 --> 00:42:47,720 to get? Like that chappie probably is 840 00:42:47,720 --> 00:42:51,280 one of the like there's a few places up and round Port Port 841 00:42:51,280 --> 00:42:53,640 Rush rhyme, like that's some of the best things ever written. 842 00:42:53,840 --> 00:42:55,320 Yeah. And I do quite. 843 00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:58,280 There's one pizza place I went to, New York where I'm like, I'd 844 00:42:58,280 --> 00:43:00,680 fly over there and get. Just get that I'd get that's a 845 00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:02,200 ball. That's a like you, you put up 846 00:43:02,200 --> 00:43:08,120 the airline, go listen, have £300 to play with won't get you 847 00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:11,240 the flight that'll be that'll be a quality move. 848 00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:12,640 Just go to New York and get paid. 849 00:43:12,800 --> 00:43:17,120 See that right, very financially responsible idea to go and do 850 00:43:17,120 --> 00:43:18,760 that. But how happy would that make? 851 00:43:18,760 --> 00:43:23,440 Oh my God, The whole experience as well though, just just in not 852 00:43:23,440 --> 00:43:26,080 stay overnight. Just get the pizza, a quick walk 853 00:43:26,080 --> 00:43:29,680 around New York, fly home. There's a place as well the the 854 00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:31,800 burger. It's a van as well as I can 855 00:43:31,800 --> 00:43:34,120 never find but the Buffalo truck in Edinburgh. 856 00:43:34,920 --> 00:43:36,000 The Buffalo truck. Yeah. 857 00:43:36,000 --> 00:43:37,960 Do you remember the the burger police we went to in Galway? 858 00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,680 Yeah. Wonder Burger or something? 859 00:43:40,680 --> 00:43:42,680 Something like that. So it's, it's got a similar kind 860 00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:46,240 of thing, but it's like a it's a chicken burger, Buffalo sauce 861 00:43:46,240 --> 00:43:49,560 and blue cheese. And it's it's my favourite thing 862 00:43:49,560 --> 00:43:51,640 in the world. Yeah, it's my, it's my absolute 863 00:43:51,640 --> 00:43:54,080 favourite food. Would you soak And you're like. 864 00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:57,760 Do you like trips? You trip, guy? 865 00:43:57,840 --> 00:44:00,200 May I love trips. What what we trip? 866 00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:02,560 Would you like to do this in 2022? 867 00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:04,520 Is there anywhere you'd? Be Tenerife for the first time 868 00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:08,040 in July, but we holiday. I know Tenerife. 869 00:44:08,920 --> 00:44:09,800 You look like, you know, Tenerife. 870 00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:11,640 You want Las America, you want Las Americas. 871 00:44:11,880 --> 00:44:13,080 That's what a way to put you, that's what a. 872 00:44:13,240 --> 00:44:16,080 Big you want. Full full half for SC. 873 00:44:17,880 --> 00:44:20,960 Well, I think it's I. Think it's half top board. 874 00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:23,760 Yeah, but we're going to go baller and we get there and be 875 00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:24,760 all mate. Just fucking throw it all in. 876 00:44:25,320 --> 00:44:26,840 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I like. You. 877 00:44:27,560 --> 00:44:30,600 Know what's a baller move when you're half bored and you walk 878 00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:32,240 down for dinner through the lobby and you've been there for 879 00:44:32,240 --> 00:44:35,080 a few days and they go to shoot do your table and you now, 880 00:44:35,080 --> 00:44:38,440 Mario, not tonight. I'm heading out for it and 881 00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:39,760 you've got dinner in a. Different bottle roof. 882 00:44:39,840 --> 00:44:41,120 He's like, my name's John. Yeah. 883 00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:45,960 I'm from Lisburn. Put the Bella Big Mom. 884 00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:50,240 Tenerife, 10 out of 10. It's a place that people might 885 00:44:50,240 --> 00:44:52,440 take a piss out of a week. It's not on the level, 886 00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:54,280 obviously, of like Benidorm, all those places. 887 00:44:54,280 --> 00:44:56,640 Yeah, but people look down their nose at Tenerife. 888 00:44:56,960 --> 00:45:00,880 Refe look down. Tenerife is brilliant, it's a 889 00:45:00,880 --> 00:45:02,880 good set. Las America's a good size. 890 00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:05,200 You've got the strip mate, You have everything you want in the 891 00:45:05,200 --> 00:45:06,920 strip. No noldy T-shirt. 892 00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:11,040 I love Noldy T-shirt. You want and whatever you want 893 00:45:11,520 --> 00:45:13,560 you. Buy them laser pens with the 894 00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:16,240 silhouettes of woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 895 00:45:16,240 --> 00:45:18,240 Sweet. You can get back to my nephew. 896 00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:20,200 George, the best thing to do with those is see if there's a 897 00:45:20,200 --> 00:45:23,080 plane going. I'll just put it on a wall I 898 00:45:23,080 --> 00:45:25,120 got. Remember those we laser pit? 899 00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:28,640 Those we laser pens. There was a lizard people used 900 00:45:28,640 --> 00:45:31,120 to be like the dude, the Shagnut and the pilot's eyes and all, 901 00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:33,440 but it was obviously like high strength industrial stuff. 902 00:45:33,680 --> 00:45:36,080 I remember like people coming back from Lexa Tenerife when you 903 00:45:36,080 --> 00:45:38,760 were like it and like a plane will go overhead and live in 904 00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:41,120 Hollywood. People go folks. 905 00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:43,600 I'll probably go down. You weren't even pressing the. 906 00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:45,480 Button. It won't as if yeah, but it's 907 00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:47,120 those ones that definitely didn't. 908 00:45:47,320 --> 00:45:49,800 They definitely weren't. No, I know, but was a pilot like 909 00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:50,640 sniper? Yeah. 910 00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:55,040 Do you? Remember these things as well. 911 00:45:55,520 --> 00:45:57,680 I will come back from Tenerife with ship like. 912 00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:00,560 Remember the way like balloons that were filled with floor and 913 00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:02,840 had like hair on them and a wee face. 914 00:46:03,720 --> 00:46:04,480 Remember that. No. 915 00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:06,520 My dad made us produce. Yeah. 916 00:46:07,560 --> 00:46:10,840 Yeah, yeah, yeah, you had the. Producer do Michaela McCallum, 917 00:46:10,840 --> 00:46:13,320 Yeah. Yeah, Refa 03. 918 00:46:13,320 --> 00:46:14,880 I remember I remember getting like. 919 00:46:16,280 --> 00:46:18,520 I think my mate brought it back as a present as well, which is 920 00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:21,680 questionable but like the grain of rice your name on. 921 00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:25,400 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That guy's probably still going. 922 00:46:25,480 --> 00:46:27,760 He'd be in 10 if he's anywhere, he'd be in Tenerife. 923 00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:33,960 That you smoking? What is his name? 924 00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:38,640 Weaving. You're getting Kev. 925 00:46:40,840 --> 00:46:42,920 Shay, please BSE. Please just BSE. 926 00:46:44,720 --> 00:46:47,120 There you go. Yeah, Tenerife. 927 00:46:47,160 --> 00:46:48,640 I fuck. I love Tenerife. 928 00:46:48,960 --> 00:46:51,720 Are you a guy who when you want holiday, like I just sit and 929 00:46:51,720 --> 00:46:53,000 chill or do you need to be going? 930 00:46:53,000 --> 00:46:56,320 I'm. Very I my favourite thing on 931 00:46:56,320 --> 00:46:58,280 hall is literally walk straight down to the pool. 932 00:46:58,280 --> 00:47:00,200 Just jump in for a second one. Oh, why? 933 00:47:00,680 --> 00:47:02,600 Yeah. Get it back out of it again 934 00:47:02,600 --> 00:47:04,760 straight away. I just like, yeah, I'm very like 935 00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:06,200 that's just said here. You're blocked. 936 00:47:06,200 --> 00:47:08,840 Here's one thing going to warn you about Tenerife sounds very 937 00:47:08,840 --> 00:47:10,280 hot. A volcanic. 938 00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:12,840 Under foot I would say like to walk on. 939 00:47:13,880 --> 00:47:14,840 Yeah, yeah. What? 940 00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:16,200 Snort. What else? 941 00:47:16,600 --> 00:47:18,000 I thought it was just meant like no. 942 00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:19,080 It's hot. See. 943 00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:22,680 When it blows at you. See if you're if you have a way. 944 00:47:22,720 --> 00:47:25,520 You build castles with it? Yeah, Yeah, but it'd be hot. 945 00:47:25,520 --> 00:47:28,320 But it'd be hot. So what I would do is bring your 946 00:47:28,320 --> 00:47:32,360 own from here on time. Yeah, don't be a weirdo. 947 00:47:32,360 --> 00:47:35,960 But if you bring a case just of sound, do your castles there. 948 00:47:35,960 --> 00:47:38,160 But when you have. Your why not just build the 949 00:47:38,160 --> 00:47:39,520 castles here and just don't go on hold it? 950 00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:40,960 Just no. Bring them here, taking them 951 00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:42,200 with you. But what? 952 00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:44,000 Spend local. Just keep. 953 00:47:44,040 --> 00:47:46,880 But you know what's going to charge you for sand you get? 954 00:47:46,880 --> 00:47:49,720 You can get free sound. Can you put? 955 00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:52,040 Well, you can pay for a builder's yard. 956 00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:54,680 You know Guy you. Just pay a fortune, someone. 957 00:47:55,840 --> 00:47:58,800 'S what I'm saying is the sound. Weed sound miners. 958 00:48:02,000 --> 00:48:07,360 Bobby sounds am I good too? So God having the end of. 959 00:48:07,360 --> 00:48:11,240 It when you walk from your sun linger to the sea, will you be 960 00:48:11,240 --> 00:48:13,280 swimming in the sea? A dabble. 961 00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:15,880 Dabble and see someone. Bring your flip flops right to 962 00:48:15,880 --> 00:48:18,720 the edge of the water. Crocs yes or no one hold this? 963 00:48:18,760 --> 00:48:20,600 Yeah. Well, not me, but you, yeah. 964 00:48:21,240 --> 00:48:23,480 Love Crocs? Yeah, I love that. 965 00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:27,120 I probably been Tenerife. It sounds like it's not true 15 966 00:48:27,120 --> 00:48:28,960 times, maybe 20. Yeah, because you didn't. 967 00:48:28,960 --> 00:48:30,280 You knew Dad always go. Was that a thing? 968 00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:32,240 Yeah. He got stroked. 969 00:48:32,240 --> 00:48:35,080 Oh my God, if this guy's about, look out for him. 970 00:48:35,240 --> 00:48:40,200 Bought some sand freezing. There was a guy doing like a 971 00:48:40,200 --> 00:48:43,480 show and all the down the strip and I everyone started watching 972 00:48:43,760 --> 00:48:45,680 and he's like a magician type fella. 973 00:48:45,760 --> 00:48:48,240 He's a wizard. Wide man, right? 974 00:48:48,600 --> 00:48:52,760 And he has two bins and he's doing that game where he's got 975 00:48:52,760 --> 00:48:56,480 like 2 black desks and three cups and he puts the cups on the 976 00:48:56,480 --> 00:48:59,320 desk and he moves them around and he's like which one is it 977 00:48:59,320 --> 00:49:01,240 under? And you guess wrong, blah blah. 978 00:49:01,240 --> 00:49:02,480 There's a sleight of hand involved. 979 00:49:02,480 --> 00:49:05,720 I'm sure he's watching and he's doing all this and he's showing 980 00:49:05,720 --> 00:49:07,800 how fast he is. He's making kids guess and they 981 00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:08,840 get it wrong and everyone laughs. 982 00:49:08,840 --> 00:49:11,440 It's all good. And he's like, OK, someone needs 983 00:49:11,440 --> 00:49:12,720 to bet here. Someone needs to bet. 984 00:49:12,840 --> 00:49:16,000 And the game looks very easy. It looks like you can guess what 985 00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:18,800 is. And he pecks my dad and my dad 986 00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:24,160 thinks he's part of a show. He thinks this guy is like doing 987 00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:27,240 like a performance piece where he's pretending they're like 988 00:49:27,240 --> 00:49:30,480 take your money and on you bet and if you lose it. 989 00:49:30,840 --> 00:49:32,960 But the guy was just a real life guy. 990 00:49:33,440 --> 00:49:36,080 So my dad, he's like, you've got to put some money in. 991 00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:38,560 My dad's like, don't have any cash on me. 992 00:49:38,560 --> 00:49:40,880 Just my dad looks in his pocket. He's like just traveller's 993 00:49:40,880 --> 00:49:43,360 cheques. And the guy looks like so slick 994 00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:44,640 and fast. He's like, yeah, I'll take, 995 00:49:44,800 --> 00:49:48,520 we'll put those input to. And there were 220 LB or 40 LB 996 00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:50,400 traveller's cheques and he put it down. 997 00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:51,760 He did. He's like, you have to gas. 998 00:49:51,760 --> 00:49:54,240 And my dad's looking at winking at me like I'm in the show. 999 00:49:54,720 --> 00:49:56,680 You know the show. I'm an actor in the show. 1000 00:49:56,920 --> 00:49:59,040 But he wasn't, he was playing himself, right? 1001 00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:01,160 He didn't know that. He thought it was anyone. 1002 00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:02,640 Yeah. And the credit would be Dennis 1003 00:50:02,640 --> 00:50:05,840 Todd as. As himself, so he's at yourself. 1004 00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:10,360 So he's moving all these around the guy and my dad goes thinks 1005 00:50:10,360 --> 00:50:11,880 he knows what 1 and it's very obvious. 1006 00:50:11,880 --> 00:50:14,480 Yeah, it should be that one. My dad pointed that guy left it 1007 00:50:14,480 --> 00:50:16,720 open. He's like, oh, so it wasn't that 1008 00:50:16,720 --> 00:50:20,280 one guy puts travel travel cheques in his pockets and then 1009 00:50:20,640 --> 00:50:23,240 everyone that's a show over and everyone just kind of goes put 1010 00:50:23,240 --> 00:50:26,840 the business and my dad like he's like no, my dad goes no, I 1011 00:50:26,840 --> 00:50:29,240 wasn't. I wasn't really betting like 1012 00:50:29,840 --> 00:50:33,160 you're just putting it on. The guy's like, no, no, the 1013 00:50:33,160 --> 00:50:39,080 guy's like, no, me, me money. You guys like no like. 1014 00:50:39,080 --> 00:50:40,960 Advising your dad a fight. There's all what happened. 1015 00:50:43,160 --> 00:50:45,240 The guy, I don't know what he was saying in Spanish, but the 1016 00:50:45,240 --> 00:50:47,920 guy looked at my dad said he was like fucking idiot. 1017 00:50:48,080 --> 00:50:52,480 You know, I might not could we could call that man so he. 1018 00:50:52,840 --> 00:50:57,520 Who you call the fucking idiot El Condo Ariel Ball back you. 1019 00:50:58,480 --> 00:51:00,160 We just lost all the money. All. 1020 00:51:01,560 --> 00:51:04,520 Of it, yeah, £40 was back in those days. 1021 00:51:05,000 --> 00:51:06,120 I'm talking. I'm talking. 1022 00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:08,360 Shit, I've. 25 years ago. Yeah. 1023 00:51:08,560 --> 00:51:10,200 More. Well, that's a lot of money. 1024 00:51:10,200 --> 00:51:11,720 Yeah, that's, that's your weeks, all that fuck. 1025 00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:13,880 Yeah, because we didn't spend a lot of money because we went 1026 00:51:13,880 --> 00:51:16,000 half board and then when you have breakfast, you know, my 1027 00:51:16,000 --> 00:51:18,960 dad's like you're the calliper. I do that when I'm when I'm on 1028 00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:20,120 the road. What? 1029 00:51:20,400 --> 00:51:23,280 Like just stay a little croissants and bread and stuff. 1030 00:51:23,280 --> 00:51:26,240 You like continental breakfast? No, we'll have a fry, but I'll. 1031 00:51:26,240 --> 00:51:28,440 Steal. I'll steal the continental 1032 00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:31,840 suffer from a lunch. What like do you have any like 1033 00:51:32,320 --> 00:51:35,360 because you travel a lot for gigs like when we can and you we 1034 00:51:35,560 --> 00:51:37,360 still go over and do the clubs and that sort of thing. 1035 00:51:37,640 --> 00:51:41,600 Do you do you have any like weird travel hacks that you do 1036 00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:45,200 like you go. This is such an inconvenience to 1037 00:51:45,200 --> 00:51:46,360 me. So you have a solution. 1038 00:51:46,680 --> 00:51:52,440 For example, I will when if I'm on a long haul flight, which 1039 00:51:52,440 --> 00:51:54,120 will probably in like 4 * a month. 1040 00:51:54,160 --> 00:51:57,280 But when I'm when I'm travelling trans intercontinental. 1041 00:51:57,720 --> 00:51:58,840 Yeah. Yeah, I go to the. 1042 00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:01,720 Paris to blind. I know and every desk open in I 1043 00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:06,200 am I know they won't have almond milk on board. 1044 00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:09,520 So I go to the Starbucks, I get a tea and then I say separately 1045 00:52:09,880 --> 00:52:12,320 could I get a bit of almond milk in a separate cup? 1046 00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:16,000 But don't want to be carrying a cup, just milk all time. 1047 00:52:16,120 --> 00:52:19,400 So I'll also buy a wee bottle of water, hoof that, pour the 1048 00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,680 almond in side of the thing, sort. 1049 00:52:21,760 --> 00:52:23,040 Of on board. See, that's a good thing because 1050 00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:26,600 I'm I've gone gluten free. So welcome to the club dairy for 1051 00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:27,880 an authorship. So I'm going to have to get 1052 00:52:27,880 --> 00:52:29,160 some. That's not a bad shout. 1053 00:52:30,320 --> 00:52:31,640 Apart from that I don't really know. 1054 00:52:31,680 --> 00:52:35,520 I long haul flights. My only thing is I get 4W and 1055 00:52:35,520 --> 00:52:37,280 cokes and bend them and then fall asleep. 1056 00:52:37,320 --> 00:52:39,040 That's not really a hack, that's more it's. 1057 00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:40,280 Just the best way to fall asleep. 1058 00:52:40,360 --> 00:52:41,360 That's the only thing I've found. 1059 00:52:41,800 --> 00:52:43,600 I feel knocked. Me out if I drink when I'm 1060 00:52:43,600 --> 00:52:45,840 flying, you know, because you kind of wake up a bit. 1061 00:52:45,920 --> 00:52:47,760 I fucking love it. I get over 4. 1062 00:52:47,760 --> 00:52:50,400 Whiskey and cokes, yeah. Is this only for long haul 1063 00:52:50,400 --> 00:52:51,720 flights? Yeah, all right. 1064 00:52:51,720 --> 00:52:52,880 You know, Yeah. No, I don't like. 1065 00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:55,040 You 3 if you're. Going to Glasgow, to Glasgow, 1066 00:52:57,720 --> 00:53:00,360 like you're all back on board this flight that Glasgow will be 1067 00:53:00,360 --> 00:53:01,600 and we're here. I'm fucking. 1068 00:53:03,200 --> 00:53:05,640 Will you try and get like your own row if you can? 1069 00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:09,200 Mitt, would you like the the fucking best experience of my 1070 00:53:09,200 --> 00:53:14,080 life was flying back from Australia about four years ago 1071 00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:17,200 and there's two flights. There's one that's like 8 hours 1072 00:53:17,200 --> 00:53:20,600 and then one that's 16 or something. 1073 00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:25,120 And and in the longer flight I must be from a Caravan was from 1074 00:53:25,680 --> 00:53:29,720 Abu Dhabi to Dublin or whichever one it was the longer flight and 1075 00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:32,120 I was sitting on the plane like window seat. 1076 00:53:32,200 --> 00:53:34,320 I'm thinking fuck is gonna be a. Nightmare on the sixteener. 1077 00:53:34,360 --> 00:53:36,480 Yeah, not on the second one. Windows seat. 1078 00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:37,760 This is shit. Fucking hell. 1079 00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:39,760 And then I'm like looking around me. 1080 00:53:39,760 --> 00:53:42,960 It's not that busy. At what point you're ready in 1081 00:53:42,960 --> 00:53:44,720 the air or you're people are still coming? 1082 00:53:44,720 --> 00:53:48,040 On people are still coming on and I'm like, I could start to 1083 00:53:48,040 --> 00:53:50,960 get like, fuck, I think I've got a fucking row here. 1084 00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:52,800 Here's what you don't want to do and make a move too early. 1085 00:53:52,840 --> 00:53:55,960 Yes, the thing. So that's so I'm like, I must 1086 00:53:55,960 --> 00:53:58,880 have looked so suspicious because that's sitting the 1087 00:53:58,880 --> 00:54:00,400 fucking like. Yeah. 1088 00:54:02,840 --> 00:54:06,080 And then could hear the students being like the captain being 1089 00:54:06,440 --> 00:54:09,520 like closed doors for departure. As soon as you I immediately 3 1090 00:54:09,520 --> 00:54:11,720 pillows, 3 blankies fucking made a Fort. 1091 00:54:11,920 --> 00:54:14,400 Yeah, like, yeah, as soon as you hear put. 1092 00:54:14,400 --> 00:54:16,000 Your belt on. Fuck you, I'm going. 1093 00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:19,560 I've made the mistake myself for I've seen people make it where 1094 00:54:19,560 --> 00:54:21,960 you are sitting beside like another person or two other 1095 00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:23,640 people. You see a free row as people are 1096 00:54:23,640 --> 00:54:26,880 bored and you go to get it. They are steward will take 1097 00:54:26,960 --> 00:54:28,960 against you. They'll be like, no, sit in your 1098 00:54:28,960 --> 00:54:30,400 room seat. And then that's not an option. 1099 00:54:30,560 --> 00:54:32,720 As soon as a boom, boom, away you go. 1100 00:54:32,720 --> 00:54:34,320 Did you? I did enough like to New York 1101 00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:36,640 and there was another. There's like a mother and 1102 00:54:36,640 --> 00:54:40,600 daughter from like Armar somewhere and going to waiting 1103 00:54:40,600 --> 00:54:43,120 at the same time. And I knew that they were going 1104 00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:44,160 for they knew I was going for it. 1105 00:54:44,160 --> 00:54:46,600 It was literally like whoever gets there first and I got there 1106 00:54:46,600 --> 00:54:49,400 first and then I was like, oh, something like we thought we 1107 00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:52,280 could we could get. And I was like, no, yeah, I. 1108 00:54:53,080 --> 00:54:56,360 I I would go to the Bahrain. What do you want? 1109 00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:58,680 Just hold me. Just land the Bahrain one time. 1110 00:54:58,920 --> 00:55:01,080 It was like it. Wasn't Bahrain, so it was 1111 00:55:01,080 --> 00:55:04,320 Australia as well? No, whichever one it was, there 1112 00:55:04,320 --> 00:55:07,080 was a couple that had been on the first flight beside me. 1113 00:55:07,840 --> 00:55:10,120 And then when it came to the second flight, they were like, 1114 00:55:10,120 --> 00:55:12,240 do you want to take the aisle? And I was like, no. 1115 00:55:12,240 --> 00:55:15,080 And they're like you'll be getting up all night because we 1116 00:55:15,080 --> 00:55:18,240 pee quite a bit. And I was like, ah fine, I don't 1117 00:55:18,240 --> 00:55:22,040 give a fucking sit in your seat. Where were you? 1118 00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:24,400 Were you at the window? No, I was the aisle and they 1119 00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:26,000 were trying to put me. They wanted to get me in the 1120 00:55:26,000 --> 00:55:29,480 window for that one. You think it's my first fucking 1121 00:55:29,480 --> 00:55:31,600 flight? I've been flying with a heart. 1122 00:55:36,680 --> 00:55:41,720 A Lingus, Connie Lingus, All of it. 1123 00:55:43,000 --> 00:55:45,080 Yeah, what do you think that guy would have his offices 1124 00:55:45,080 --> 00:55:47,120 hypothetically, not Belfast like. 1125 00:55:47,160 --> 00:55:48,680 Right here. Hollywood, yeah. 1126 00:55:49,640 --> 00:55:51,400 Hollywood, yeah. That's the whole thing. 1127 00:55:51,640 --> 00:55:53,960 He he has people on his address and he's definitely. 1128 00:55:53,960 --> 00:55:55,200 What happened here? Hollywood. 1129 00:55:55,200 --> 00:55:58,360 The Hollywood the hard way. It's one really, really small 1130 00:55:58,360 --> 00:56:00,520 room, but it's glamorous as fuck. 1131 00:56:00,800 --> 00:56:01,880 Yeah, yeah. It's like. 1132 00:56:02,000 --> 00:56:04,120 Gold. Yeah, yeah, gold left from 1133 00:56:04,120 --> 00:56:06,680 fucking Willy Wonka. Yeah, he's got like, art on the 1134 00:56:06,680 --> 00:56:08,840 ceiling. Like commissioned art on the 1135 00:56:08,840 --> 00:56:12,080 ceiling, Yeah. And a cardboard cut it a Ted 1136 00:56:12,080 --> 00:56:14,800 Danson, but it's not the actual 1 from 3. 1137 00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:16,280 No, it's Teddy sharing them dancing. 1138 00:56:27,760 --> 00:56:30,080 You didn't expect Daddy sharing this time of morning. 1139 00:56:31,680 --> 00:56:37,320 There was a lot of process. For a second I went that is 1140 00:56:37,320 --> 00:56:39,080 Teddy sharing him famous for dancing. 1141 00:56:41,320 --> 00:56:43,200 Come on, we're going to meet Ted Danson. 1142 00:56:43,440 --> 00:56:49,480 Hey, Daddy. Did you see me against Real 1143 00:56:49,480 --> 00:56:53,400 Madrid? Peter Carey play for my I don't 1144 00:56:53,400 --> 00:56:55,320 know what is Teddy Sherman thought like I don't I can't 1145 00:56:55,320 --> 00:56:56,280 remember. I don't know. 1146 00:56:57,360 --> 00:56:59,440 I don't know. This is fucking I don't know if 1147 00:56:59,440 --> 00:57:00,680 it's even funny. It just happened. 1148 00:57:00,680 --> 00:57:03,800 I had a very strange experience about a week and a half ago. 1149 00:57:03,800 --> 00:57:07,240 So we sit at home and we start as bad skin and stuff. 1150 00:57:07,240 --> 00:57:10,000 I've just started like playing Call of Duty right on a beanbag 1151 00:57:10,000 --> 00:57:12,080 chair stoned. Is that does the doctor 1152 00:57:12,080 --> 00:57:14,160 recommend that there's a Maggie? Three things. 1153 00:57:14,360 --> 00:57:17,520 Yeah, I've figured out a play called, well, it's 3 1/2 hours, 1154 00:57:17,520 --> 00:57:20,560 roughly a day, right? But most of that time was just 1155 00:57:20,560 --> 00:57:21,800 getting in and out of the beanbag. 1156 00:57:21,840 --> 00:57:24,360 Yeah, without tossing stuff because yeah, right, I'm more 1157 00:57:24,360 --> 00:57:28,040 like Luby. But do you play a pleasure not 1158 00:57:28,040 --> 00:57:30,680 to you? So I don't have headphones or 1159 00:57:30,680 --> 00:57:32,480 anything, right? And when you don't have 1160 00:57:32,480 --> 00:57:34,600 headphones, sometimes you can hear all the people playing the 1161 00:57:34,600 --> 00:57:38,240 game coming through your TV. OK, I'm stoned as fuck and I 1162 00:57:38,240 --> 00:57:41,520 could there were some some guy was playing and his kid was 1163 00:57:41,520 --> 00:57:43,280 clearly trying to get a go, right. 1164 00:57:43,480 --> 00:57:45,440 So this guy is like, fuck off me fucking die. 1165 00:57:45,440 --> 00:57:48,800 You can't fucking. And I just like kind of zoned 1166 00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:51,280 out away, but I could just hear the weekend called Daddy, why 1167 00:57:51,280 --> 00:57:53,840 did you die? I'm fucking shit myself. 1168 00:57:58,440 --> 00:58:00,160 Daddy, you've you've blown your head up. 1169 00:58:00,280 --> 00:58:02,280 Daddy white, kill him. Daddy kill him. 1170 00:58:06,280 --> 00:58:08,640 Oh fuck like and my feet were all slippy because my thread is 1171 00:58:13,280 --> 00:58:15,880 like, terrified. Could you be thrown so much 1172 00:58:15,880 --> 00:58:18,720 further? No, because you're so lubed. 1173 00:58:18,920 --> 00:58:21,640 Like if you were set across the floor a month ago compared to 1174 00:58:21,640 --> 00:58:23,080 now. Yeah, you could play Cardinal 1175 00:58:23,080 --> 00:58:23,880 me. Right. 1176 00:58:24,160 --> 00:58:25,760 Can we? Yeah, we'll try it. 1177 00:58:26,320 --> 00:58:28,240 I've nothing right now. Curling with Mickey Bottle. 1178 00:58:28,240 --> 00:58:30,360 We're going to speak to the commissioners right now about 1179 00:58:30,360 --> 00:58:35,040 this. We've got Anthony Costa, gets 1180 00:58:35,040 --> 00:58:36,760 you by the belt there, but Danny's sharing and they're 1181 00:58:36,760 --> 00:58:39,640 going to fuck you, fuck you down Royal Ave. 1182 00:58:42,720 --> 00:58:44,280 Fuck you down. Royal Ave was the name of the 1183 00:58:44,280 --> 00:58:50,320 second series. We got a magician from 1184 00:58:50,320 --> 00:58:51,960 Tenerife's going to. Host this. 1185 00:58:51,960 --> 00:58:57,760 Kids fucking dynamite. I swear to God he took my Rolex. 1186 00:59:02,880 --> 00:59:05,240 I made him a cup of tea. I looked down and fucking moved. 1187 00:59:06,080 --> 00:59:07,960 He's Got Talent. That takes talent. 1188 00:59:08,680 --> 00:59:18,720 Takes a lot to surprise me. Can we please, like, I don't 1189 00:59:18,720 --> 00:59:22,200 care what it is. Can we write a film, get it, me 1190 00:59:22,200 --> 00:59:23,240 it. I don't care who's in it, don't 1191 00:59:23,240 --> 00:59:25,320 care what the budget is, but there has to be a moment where 1192 00:59:25,320 --> 00:59:28,640 that exact thing happens. It takes a lot to surprise me in 1193 00:59:28,640 --> 00:59:30,560 the person jobs. Yeah, definitely. 1194 00:59:30,840 --> 00:59:32,720 I love to write a film. What's that guy called? 1195 00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:36,880 Good question. Wreck. 1196 00:59:37,920 --> 00:59:40,920 No, he's in a wreck. Is SEMA, is it like a little bit 1197 00:59:40,920 --> 00:59:46,480 American, Italian maybe or, or is he, is it more of a, you 1198 00:59:46,480 --> 00:59:49,480 know, Goldstein thing? Shit, yeah, would be. 1199 00:59:49,480 --> 00:59:50,880 What about an Italian first name? 1200 00:59:50,880 --> 00:59:52,360 Jewish second. Yeah, yeah. 1201 00:59:52,680 --> 00:59:56,640 Oh, Italian. Ricardo Goldstein. 1202 00:59:56,760 --> 00:59:57,640 Yeah. Yeah. 1203 00:59:57,800 --> 00:59:59,720 Because he, Ricardo Goldstein, I wanted to go. 1204 00:59:59,760 --> 01:00:01,480 He's Irish. Yeah, yeah, he. 1205 01:00:01,520 --> 01:00:03,080 Wanted to do the show business, yeah. 1206 01:00:03,080 --> 01:00:04,840 And he thought Holly was run by Jules. 1207 01:00:05,040 --> 01:00:08,720 I told I told him I'd have an office in Hollywood, and I do. 1208 01:00:10,160 --> 01:00:11,120 You can't. Beat them. 1209 01:00:11,280 --> 01:00:22,360 Join them. He's got 1 rabbi curl different 1210 01:00:22,360 --> 01:00:24,760 colour from his normal hair. I've got to make it off. 1211 01:00:24,760 --> 01:00:27,280 You can't refuse, Frank. Mitchell and Linda Nolan, what 1212 01:00:27,280 --> 01:00:28,280 are they doing? I don't. 1213 01:00:28,280 --> 01:00:30,480 Know I'm going to make it 1 offer you can't refuse. 1214 01:00:30,480 --> 01:00:36,080 I want to buy this cash Quay. Get me the puddle jumper deluxe, 1215 01:00:40,280 --> 01:00:43,800 Julie. Is the puddle jumper outside 1216 01:00:43,960 --> 01:00:46,880 good? I've got 2 grand to play with me 1217 01:00:46,880 --> 01:00:48,840 and Butler are going to the Boucher Rd. 1218 01:00:49,880 --> 01:00:53,000 I got an idea for a new car. It's called the Audi Partner. 1219 01:00:55,400 --> 01:00:58,560 The kid says he can get me an Audi for 500 large. 1220 01:01:01,840 --> 01:01:04,000 Butler just did it, showed 80,000 people. 1221 01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:06,560 The kid made £900. All I got to do is move some 1222 01:01:06,560 --> 01:01:10,960 sand from here to Tenerife. It's risky, but I'm willing to 1223 01:01:10,960 --> 01:01:14,760 take the risk. That's why I looked. 1224 01:01:16,160 --> 01:01:21,000 He can't smoke a cigar and walk. I can do it all. 1225 01:01:21,160 --> 01:01:22,800 I'll put you in an Oscar winner film. 1226 01:01:22,800 --> 01:01:25,040 I'll make a billion dollars. Ask me to walk down the street 1227 01:01:25,040 --> 01:01:27,000 when I'm smoking this, I can't help you. 1228 01:01:31,120 --> 01:01:34,000 Marlon Brando says to me, if you keep smoking that and you walk 1229 01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:35,920 over here, you're my agent for life. 1230 01:01:35,920 --> 01:01:37,560 I said. Marlon, I can't do it. 1231 01:01:39,560 --> 01:01:41,640 I remember the time Richard Gere was in here. 1232 01:01:43,560 --> 01:01:46,600 He said, hey, Goldstein, I bought you 1/2. 1233 01:01:46,640 --> 01:01:48,760 I said take that half and stick it up your ass. 1234 01:01:48,960 --> 01:01:55,800 And he did. I remember the time Michael 1235 01:01:55,920 --> 01:02:06,000 Jackson. You said you like hamsters. 1236 01:02:06,000 --> 01:02:08,280 I said I don't like hamsters. I don't like ham. 1237 01:02:08,280 --> 01:02:10,640 But one guy don't like it. Teddy sharing ham. 1238 01:02:13,480 --> 01:02:16,720 I was working on Top of the Pops. 1239 01:02:16,720 --> 01:02:19,040 I was working with Jimmy before the allegations of Poison. 1240 01:02:20,640 --> 01:02:24,280 I said Jimmy, you want three, I can only get you 2, he said. 1241 01:02:24,280 --> 01:02:26,440 Goldstein. Don't take no for an answer. 1242 01:02:26,640 --> 01:02:35,200 If I know, then what I know now? I tell you what, I'm never 1243 01:02:35,200 --> 01:02:37,240 surprised, but that scared the fuck out of me now. 1244 01:02:41,520 --> 01:02:43,800 Oh. All right, beat James Samuel, 1245 01:02:44,040 --> 01:02:45,760 one of the best, one of the greats. 1246 01:02:46,240 --> 01:02:48,160 Stewart fuck, I always messed them. 1247 01:02:50,720 --> 01:02:52,080 Up. Oh man, we have to make that. 1248 01:02:52,720 --> 01:02:53,840 Yeah, definitely. That's it. 1249 01:02:55,040 --> 01:02:56,720 I've got the time. Goldstein. 1250 01:02:57,960 --> 01:02:59,320 That's it. Goldstein Enterprises. 1251 01:02:59,680 --> 01:03:02,120 Goldstein Enterprises, just at a business park? 1252 01:03:02,440 --> 01:03:06,080 Yeah, in Belfast. And like he has like we start up 1253 01:03:06,080 --> 01:03:08,280 throwing them and stuff, you know, like a cupcake business 1254 01:03:08,280 --> 01:03:11,240 and all that. And they have like Vegas gravy. 1255 01:03:11,520 --> 01:03:13,560 Yeah. And they have meetings with 1256 01:03:13,560 --> 01:03:17,520 like, you know, all the tenants, you know the the person who runs 1257 01:03:17,520 --> 01:03:19,840 the offices. And he's there like normal 1258 01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:21,040 people. Yeah, exactly. 1259 01:03:21,360 --> 01:03:22,480 I could be fucking funny. Yeah, yeah. 1260 01:03:23,120 --> 01:03:27,240 I got ideas for this place pool. Like, no, Goulton, obviously. 1261 01:03:27,240 --> 01:03:29,600 No. Yeah, nothing's a bad idea, you 1262 01:03:29,600 --> 01:03:31,480 know. Mr Goldson, I think this is a 1263 01:03:32,040 --> 01:03:34,040 sign of your weakness. Here's a sign for you Wet. 1264 01:03:34,040 --> 01:03:40,360 Floor Speaking of wet floors, 11 time I fucked Marilyn Monroe, 1265 01:03:41,240 --> 01:03:42,920 Manson, I always get them mixed up. 1266 01:03:46,480 --> 01:03:50,200 That's this whole thing, just getting to everybody's mixed up. 1267 01:03:52,600 --> 01:03:54,520 Not Marilyn Charles. Fuck. 1268 01:04:04,720 --> 01:04:08,120 Oh, that's very, very enjoyable. I want to. 1269 01:04:12,000 --> 01:04:13,640 I've commissioned the public Garden. 1270 01:04:14,040 --> 01:04:15,800 It's called the Sarah Jessica Park. 1271 01:04:18,920 --> 01:04:20,960 They can't drive towards, you know, what the husband's like. 1272 01:04:35,640 --> 01:04:37,280 You couldn't. You couldn't find the building. 1273 01:04:37,280 --> 01:04:39,160 I will. Unfortunately, the sign fell. 1274 01:04:39,280 --> 01:04:49,600 Don't even my fucking sense. We have to leave it there, I 1275 01:04:49,600 --> 01:04:51,560 think. I think we have to leave it 1276 01:04:51,560 --> 01:04:53,080 there because it can't. It can't get better. 1277 01:04:53,080 --> 01:04:55,320 You know what I mean? You sometimes you just go, this 1278 01:04:55,320 --> 01:04:59,160 can't get better. It's a party, it's midnight, the 1279 01:04:59,160 --> 01:05:01,640 party's going to go on to 4 or. Five, it's time to go home. 1280 01:05:01,800 --> 01:05:03,640 It's time go home when the party's out of. 1281 01:05:03,640 --> 01:05:04,280 Regret it? Yeah. 1282 01:05:04,760 --> 01:05:06,200 Go home when the party's at its best. 1283 01:05:06,200 --> 01:05:09,720 That's what I always say that's. What I said, that's what I said. 1284 01:05:09,720 --> 01:05:14,840 The Culkin, I said get out, they don't love you. 1285 01:05:17,480 --> 01:05:19,360 Let him keep the fucking specky brother. 1286 01:05:24,560 --> 01:05:32,160 Thank you very much. I guess Waterfront Hall. 1287 01:05:32,760 --> 01:05:37,400 Waterfront on December 2022. I want to in February. 1288 01:05:37,720 --> 01:05:39,800 Nice. So turn the show you've just 1289 01:05:39,800 --> 01:05:42,000 done, Yeah. Turn the show, which is Nelson 1290 01:05:42,000 --> 01:05:44,880 Hall, so we're doing all the hotspots in the skeleton, 1291 01:05:45,280 --> 01:05:50,040 Bangor, Newcastle. Fuck the oldcastle. 1292 01:05:50,080 --> 01:05:52,440 Yeah, fuck the armour. You're my everybody's man. 1293 01:05:52,640 --> 01:05:55,360 Yeah, yeah, someone turned. Well, so. 1294 01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:56,840 And then check it. Out Omar. 1295 01:05:56,840 --> 01:06:02,160 Oh my God in the strew oversight was made. 1296 01:06:03,040 --> 01:06:04,440 Should be fine. You never learned. 1297 01:06:05,160 --> 01:06:07,480 Yeah, we'll put tickets for Waterfront in the in the 1298 01:06:07,480 --> 01:06:09,880 description of this episode. But that's that's a new show. 1299 01:06:10,240 --> 01:06:11,280 Yeah, that'll be a new show called. 1300 01:06:11,280 --> 01:06:13,640 Yeah, Come on. Just because I had to think of 1301 01:06:13,640 --> 01:06:14,880 something. Yeah, I did. 1302 01:06:14,880 --> 01:06:18,360 Yeah, I was a wee bit like, I was like, can you type it out so 1303 01:06:18,360 --> 01:06:20,080 it looks like I'm going, damn it. 1304 01:06:22,840 --> 01:06:24,880 Yeah, do the whole show as I got. 1305 01:06:25,360 --> 01:06:26,720 Yeah, I'd love to do something like. 1306 01:06:27,640 --> 01:06:32,320 That can we be? What if we're showbiz twins and 1307 01:06:32,320 --> 01:06:33,840 it's just not referenced? That we're not referenced. 1308 01:06:33,840 --> 01:06:36,200 That wouldn't, yeah. The Goldstein brothers. 1309 01:06:37,960 --> 01:06:40,520 I could, yeah, could be ready. Fuck. 1310 01:06:40,520 --> 01:06:43,280 Council Waterfront we've got. Yeah. 1311 01:06:43,520 --> 01:06:45,760 Cheers for coming on. Mickey Bartlett, everyone. 1312 01:06:46,640 --> 01:06:48,880 We'll call this episode the Puddle Jumper time, I think. 1313 01:06:49,640 --> 01:06:50,520 Cheers. See you next time. 1314 01:06:50,520 --> 01:06:52,400 Do you want to go to Jet Centre?