1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:02,960 I'm Michael. Che and I'm Colin Jose, and 2 00:00:02,960 --> 00:00:05,280 we've got a little secret. Actually, it's a pretty big 3 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:06,480 secret. Well, now you got to give the 4 00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:08,360 people something. I'm not saying a word. 5 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:09,920 Oh, then people will know to tune in. 6 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:12,080 Come on, tell them a little. Like how we're hosting of comedy 7 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:14,640 events streaming only on Peacock, exactly how it's called 8 00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,200 New York After Dark and it's a comedy show that only features 9 00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:18,960 drop in comic. Boom, you nail. 10 00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:20,360 Into Michael Chase phone numbers. 11 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:21,960 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, hey. 12 00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:25,720 New York After Dark. It's some kind of comedy thing, 13 00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:28,000 and it's streaming now only on Peacock. 14 00:00:29,760 --> 00:00:35,480 You love it. Zippers, welcome to this episode 15 00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:39,040 of the Tea with Me podcast with me, little old she and Todd. 16 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:44,360 Before we get stuck in to another episode, another one, 17 00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:48,000 let me just give a big shout out to our sponsors. 18 00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:50,320 But before all, before I did that, let me plug 19 00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:54,320 patreon.com/tea With Me podcast where you get all the bonus 20 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:56,360 content. You get a bonus episode on a 21 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:59,400 Monday. On a Friday, we do a live stream 22 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,880 episode and that means anything goes. 23 00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:04,319 It is genuinely live. The chat bar is open. 24 00:01:04,319 --> 00:01:07,480 You can ask a question, suggest a topic, and you can give a 25 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:09,160 shout out to your uncle who's in Maghaberry. 26 00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:10,840 Whatever it is you want to do, you can do it. 27 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:12,280 And we have some great guests on that. 28 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:15,960 Last week I literally shaved the guest's head for charity. 29 00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:19,120 So Patreon, the conference team with Me podcast, you can check 30 00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:22,520 that out. Our sponsors are as follows. 31 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:27,440 Panjana. Look, if you're in Bhankrani, 32 00:01:27,440 --> 00:01:32,840 you drink panjana. If you're in any location, you 33 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:36,160 should be drinking panjana. 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Trim that Bush and you're going 73 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:53,280 to look kush tea tea with me.com. 74 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:57,320 No manscape.com, you just go tea with me for 20% off for free 75 00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:59,200 shipping. Let's get stuck into this 76 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:01,320 episode. The guest episodes. 77 00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:06,440 The line UPS have been sent from heaven with our brilliant guests 78 00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:08,600 and we're going to continue to do that. 79 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:12,720 My guest today and I are doing a show in London next weekend at 80 00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:15,320 Leicester Square Theatre. Some tickets are still 81 00:04:15,320 --> 00:04:17,399 available. I'm warning you, it's going to 82 00:04:17,399 --> 00:04:20,440 sell out. My guest is Colin Gettis, the 83 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:24,360 man behind Lavery's comedy club I Am Fighter. 84 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:28,400 A lot of phenomenal comedy throughout the years and a good 85 00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:31,440 mate of mine. I did his podcast last week he's 86 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:34,720 doing mine this week and that's just what we love to see. 87 00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:38,200 We're going to have a lot of fun on this enjoy this episode of 88 00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:42,520 the TV podcast with my friend Colin get us also pitch on the 89 00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:45,960 com such TV me podcast if you if you let God do you. 90 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:54,120 My guest is Colin get us Colin. We've got to kick off talking 91 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:56,760 about the big story. If you're on, we've got to talk 92 00:04:56,760 --> 00:05:01,440 about Messi leaving Barcelona I. Mean when he when he got on that 93 00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,880 podium and cried, I was so erect. 94 00:05:06,320 --> 00:05:09,320 It was like, you know when you leave a summer scheme you need 95 00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:11,480 to do a summer scheme and you make new friends and you go, 96 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:14,800 we'll always stay mates and then you just never see them again. 97 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:18,480 I just, you just care. I just prowled around summer 98 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:21,280 schemes just like a lone wolf because I would just, you know, 99 00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:22,880 you pick three sessions. They're like, do you want to go 100 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:24,200 swimming, play football, whatever. 101 00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:27,560 And I would just go play football every time and smash 102 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:30,000 people, run through them and leave. 103 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:32,120 At the end of the day, we're about fucking 34 goals. 104 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:36,680 In the back in your early 20s. I've essentially looked the same 105 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:40,800 for about 21 years now. Yeah, I feel like who are you 106 00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:46,600 here to pick up kids? It's one of your taxis. 107 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:50,720 That said summer schemes. I mean, if you thought I'd know 108 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:55,200 you're probably paying 250 a day, unlimited activities and 109 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:57,160 refreshments. Like that's unbelievable that 110 00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:58,760 now I. Wonder how much a summer scheme 111 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:00,560 is now? It's probably 40 grand. 112 00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:02,880 Yeah, like when our kids eventually go on Summer Games 113 00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:07,240 plus with health and safety. Oh yeah, They'll not be allowed 114 00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:08,400 to do anything, you know what I mean? 115 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:09,520 It'll be like arts and crafts and. 116 00:06:09,680 --> 00:06:11,840 Oh yeah, they'll be doing like we're doing. 117 00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:17,240 Yeah, sign language, just like what's like virtual football. 118 00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:19,080 Yeah, everyone's got the goggles on. 119 00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:23,680 What other bullshit do you do? Not touch gaming, just gaming. 120 00:06:23,680 --> 00:06:27,000 I I always made friends the summer scheme and then vowed 121 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:29,920 that we would always stay in touch and then just never, just 122 00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:31,480 never did. I'll see you next summer. 123 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:34,720 Yeah, I remember there was a guy called Stuart McGee I became 124 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:37,360 mates with and he wrote, he wrote his number down, which is 125 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:42,240 kind of, you know, forward, but he wrote Smart McGee so I never 126 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:44,440 phoned him. Instead of Stewart Mcgay instead 127 00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:46,640 of Stewart Mcgay. Ironically, not so smart. 128 00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:48,600 No, no, no, not at all. Thick Mcgay. 129 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:52,120 Summer schemes were so good so. Good. 130 00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,200 Yeah. And there was always, you know, 131 00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:54,800 there would, there would just be, there would have these like 132 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,880 leaders that were like probably 17. 133 00:06:57,080 --> 00:06:58,520 Yeah. And you were always like fuck. 134 00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:01,200 Look at her. Because she's remotely older. 135 00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:05,520 Oh my God. And she fancies me. 136 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:09,760 That actually happened to me one time. 137 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:12,160 There was some summer scheme thing and they were like should 138 00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:14,080 you join our table, whatever. I remember sitting down with us 139 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:16,320 a bit of food and like pulling up the edge of the table. 140 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:18,720 There's all other kids and like 2 leaders and like my knee 141 00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:21,840 touched her knee and I was like well someone's pregnant now, you 142 00:07:22,080 --> 00:07:23,560 know what I mean? And it's not her. 143 00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:27,800 I just remember like fucking freezing on the spot. 144 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:29,880 I was like, well, what happens now? 145 00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:33,920 How's summer scheme? I remember doing a football 146 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:37,720 summer scheme and the guy who ran it, my dad picked me up and 147 00:07:37,720 --> 00:07:40,680 then we saw the guy who was running it and the guy goes, 148 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:44,640 this your son and my diagnose, I was watching him today goes he 149 00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:46,840 didn't play too well. He goes I get my Dick and he 150 00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:50,120 gets back to the house and the guy got deadly serious. 151 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:53,880 I was like, don't be hitting the kids to my dad was like very 152 00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:55,680 much made a point of life. We hit them here. 153 00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:59,200 Yeah, yeah. Or it's safe, that's what I'll 154 00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:01,320 hit him a Dick. Yeah, the guy was like, no, 155 00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:02,920 don't you know what I mean? As if like. 156 00:08:03,120 --> 00:08:04,960 This your dad fucking no shut down. 157 00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:12,480 Yeah, you missed. Do you think when your son gets 158 00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:15,720 older place maybe play sports and things like that, what sort 159 00:08:15,720 --> 00:08:19,000 of die will you be? You'd be like, just stand back 160 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:22,360 or you reckon you'd you know. Well, I saw a clip of it was 161 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:25,000 like college wrestling in America and one guy left the 162 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:28,160 other guy and sort of unnecessarily drop them a bit on 163 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:31,200 his head, nearly that aggressive and the die comes out from the 164 00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:33,720 sideline and just spear tackles under the floor. 165 00:08:33,919 --> 00:08:36,520 That'll probably be me. Yeah, just fucking empty some 166 00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:38,720 teenager. If someone did the my son, I 167 00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:42,440 would just be I bet you do his mom over e-mail after you know. 168 00:08:43,159 --> 00:08:44,400 Over e-mail? Not even in person. 169 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,960 No what's? Your home life like horrible 170 00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:51,200 state as comp but I said he like, you know, Eddie got a wasp 171 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:52,640 on his arm and I near kicked his arm off. 172 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:53,920 Yeah, yeah. You know, he's trying to be 173 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:55,040 protective. Nearly killed him. 174 00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:56,840 Yeah. I mean, the difference there is 175 00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,840 if that was the case, I just make sure I'm OK first. 176 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:00,360 Yeah. And then I'd be like, OK, are 177 00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:02,120 you all right? You know, it's because it's like 178 00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:04,200 that's, that's what you're supposed to do on a plane. 179 00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:06,800 Wasp lands on your wife, you throw the baby at her. 180 00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:10,400 Yeah. I don't know if you've seen 181 00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:11,920 pictures of them, but I. Wouldn't be able to throw a 182 00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:13,640 weights belt I. Wouldn't be able to throw them, 183 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:14,600 yeah. Trying to get them off the 184 00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:16,680 floor. We're doing a gig in London. 185 00:09:16,680 --> 00:09:19,800 We're going to in in like a week and a half, two weeks. 186 00:09:20,040 --> 00:09:23,680 Do we have anywhere to stay yet? Just. 187 00:09:23,680 --> 00:09:26,200 Drop in my head. Just drop this guy's name in my 188 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:29,200 bed. I think the closer you get to go 189 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:32,440 in and then you book it, don't worry that'll but that's they're 190 00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:34,200 trying to get you by making this book early. 191 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:35,520 Well, I've thought a lot about that. 192 00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:36,840 That's how I was thinking recently. 193 00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:38,800 And then I tried to book like a stag day for someone, right? 194 00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:41,520 Nightmare Is this a new freelance service you're 195 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:43,440 offering? Who, you going on the stag or 196 00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:44,680 you? Just don't go on the stag. 197 00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:48,960 Yeah, my contribution so far was we just got a lot of shed 198 00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:50,280 shirts. Yeah, yeah. 199 00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:53,200 Where where you having it? The North Coast don't give too 200 00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:57,280 much away. OK, what was the rush? 201 00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:00,040 Or is it government state? What's that sketch? 202 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:02,720 Yeah, the North Coast. Can't really say where, but 203 00:10:02,720 --> 00:10:04,800 like, you know, it's going to be one of a couple of places. 204 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:09,680 Balamani, I love stags. I don't think I've ever been on 205 00:10:09,680 --> 00:10:10,600 one. Yeah. 206 00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:14,480 Yeah, they're just, I think when you, I think if you went to one 207 00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:16,680 when you were younger, it'd be like carnage. 208 00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:19,200 But I think once you get to about 30 and you go on a stag, 209 00:10:19,360 --> 00:10:21,880 it's a right amount of fun. It's a right amount because if 210 00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:24,320 you wrapping it up by 10:00 PM. Yeah, if you said something like 211 00:10:24,920 --> 00:10:27,600 I'm having a nap before we go out here, it wouldn't be like 212 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:31,080 fucking. Well, Dave went became on my 213 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:34,120 stag and was I think the only one with a baby at that point. 214 00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:37,200 And we arrived and he was like, you know, he had what he calls 215 00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:39,400 his party shades on it'd. Be awkward at the stag just 216 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:43,080 carrying a baby. Around he had the Hawaiian shirt 217 00:10:43,320 --> 00:10:45,400 and he bought bought himself a bottle of Bok fast as soon as we 218 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:46,840 arrived. All these grand plans. 219 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:49,840 And then he reaches up an hour later, he's like here, I'm going 220 00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:51,760 to have a nap for a while. And then he seemed to nap for 221 00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:54,280 the three days and nobody can understand it. 222 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:55,640 And I was like, what are you doing? 223 00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:58,840 And I think Holly's daughter was only maybe like 6 months at this 224 00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:00,760 point. I was like, come on, you're in 225 00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:03,360 New Yorker, like, let's go out. He's like, I physically can't 226 00:11:03,680 --> 00:11:06,360 and he got so much abuse for it and then as soon as that a kid I 227 00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:07,920 was like, I absolutely understand. 228 00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:09,000 Like he. Didn't have the energy. 229 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:10,440 To go out, he just didn't have the energy. 230 00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:14,040 He saw a bed, realised it was his for three days and went 231 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:18,120 well, I could go on a pedal with 19 guys or I could just sleep 232 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:19,280 here. So he just slept. 233 00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:22,880 That was like the time my dad got an operation on fire whose 234 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:26,480 veins on his legs and they literally were like, we really 235 00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:27,920 struggle to wake you up there, Paul. 236 00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:31,720 And he was like, I was just fucking knackered, you know what 237 00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:33,040 I mean? Hospital bed themselves. 238 00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:37,520 He's like shaking them and all you dead, Mr Cattles, these if 239 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:44,680 you've locked off, I'm slapped in for 22 years, you're. 240 00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:46,720 Just asking for more shit to be done. 241 00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,240 Take a look at my bollocks right over here. 242 00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:53,920 Take that leg off. I don't really. 243 00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:56,680 Take it, go back in and check. I don't know what's going on. 244 00:11:57,000 --> 00:12:00,320 I The last time we went away was probably Raffle. 245 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:05,080 Probably raffle all those years ago or no, maybe Galway. 246 00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:07,040 Yeah, what? I like that. 247 00:12:07,080 --> 00:12:09,680 Was weird too. Like, I feel like we need to go 248 00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:12,480 somewhere where you can actually enjoy yourself. 249 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:15,400 Yeah, the Galway thing was like, morning was about to have a baby 250 00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:19,840 and I was like, right fucking. I remember you, she like just 251 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:21,280 like literally about to have a baby. 252 00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:23,640 You were in Galway and I remember you were maybe 253 00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:26,600 organising her to like come down like at the train down and 254 00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:28,400 you're like, look, if she has a baby, I could just drive back 255 00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:30,840 sick 4 hours. I have palpitations for that. 256 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:33,280 And I knew I was like, it's going to happen as soon as you 257 00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:35,400 hit stage. I don't want to, you know, bring 258 00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:39,560 up the word hormones, but women be crazy, you know what I mean? 259 00:12:39,560 --> 00:12:41,560 Around that sort of time, it's like, do you want to? 260 00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:42,640 I was like, do you want to go to this? 261 00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:43,680 You know, we can stay in a nice hotel. 262 00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:46,360 It'll be lovely. And she's like, no, no, it's a 263 00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:48,400 bit late, whatever. And then as soon as I was down 264 00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:50,880 there it was like, I think we might come up on the train and I 265 00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:54,360 was like mental behaviour. And it was on the last day. 266 00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:57,400 I was like, I'm basically coming home tonight and you're going to 267 00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:59,640 come up. Today we went for so many nice 268 00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:02,320 walks and that you know, it's funny out after gigs. 269 00:13:02,320 --> 00:13:05,120 Like, obviously at festivals, you meet up with other 270 00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:06,600 comedians. You see each other for the first 271 00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:08,640 time in a couple of years. You have drinks. 272 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:11,680 I remember every night going back to the hotel and you'd see 273 00:13:11,680 --> 00:13:12,960 comedians going out for the night. 274 00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:14,480 Yeah. And then nothing made me 275 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,960 happier. And I was like, you'll be paying 276 00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:18,080 for this tomorrow. Oh, yeah. 277 00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:20,040 You know, just getting them for that half 10 sleep. 278 00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:25,680 I know it's you're very like I I struggle to contain it right. 279 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:27,720 You know the what you know. Like of course I would love to 280 00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:30,280 fucking rager every. Single night and I struggle to 281 00:13:30,280 --> 00:13:32,760 make it look like I want to do that Oh yeah You know, I give 282 00:13:32,760 --> 00:13:34,480 the impression I'm like Oh yeah, we'll go she. 283 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:38,080 Does a lot of that, yeah. That was like the. 284 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:42,400 Blowing out cocaine. Sorry, goes everywhere I chew 285 00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:45,240 Crohn's. You know what? 286 00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:48,200 I mean. Fucking I'm always, I'm always 287 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:49,440 putting poppers into a plant pot. 288 00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:56,120 Oh yeah, no, lovely. That's why I'm going back early 289 00:13:57,160 --> 00:13:58,480 just now. Poppers in a bath. 290 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:02,120 Here, tell you what I don't know. 291 00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:03,720 I think it's banned. I remember having the flu one 292 00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:05,640 time having couple of night nurse. 293 00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:07,880 Oh, I think you're going to say and someone recommended pop. 294 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:10,520 No, I'm just talking about, you know, safe drugs you can take in 295 00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:11,600 the home, please. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 296 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:12,960 And a couple of night nurse and got a bath. 297 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:15,240 Nearly couldn't get out of the fucking bath. 298 00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:17,920 Yeah, it's fucked. Just thing we're like the same 299 00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:20,640 thing with your dad. Just real, just real drowsy. 300 00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:22,680 Good to get the head. Shot in it. 301 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:26,640 London's going to be. London's going to be a lot of 302 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:31,560 fun because when I go do gigs, I know how you travel. 303 00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:33,360 When you travel, you go to your school, you bring an opener 304 00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:35,080 sometimes, well, which makes it easier. 305 00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:38,320 I like my own company. What do you mean definitely not 306 00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,560 easier? What do you think? 307 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:42,920 Let me bring a fucking 6 foot two child with me. 308 00:14:42,920 --> 00:14:47,280 Do you need the toilet? Strapping in an old plane and. 309 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:49,440 Can we? Can we an extender please? 310 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:53,000 Does he sit on his knee in the plane with his own his own belt? 311 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,840 He sits on everyone else's knee. Everyone's knee on the fucking 312 00:14:55,840 --> 00:15:01,800 row. But it's that thing of like, I 313 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:06,160 like my own company, but there's such a lead up to gigs, you 314 00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:09,360 know, there's like 3-4 hours beforehand to go back to hotel. 315 00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:11,360 Do you sleep for an hour or what do you do? 316 00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:13,800 So it would be nice to just be together. 317 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:15,400 Just chill out, Yeah, I mean you. 318 00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:17,760 Want to do a ghoster or something? 319 00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:20,240 No. Ghost. 320 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:21,960 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Haunted. 321 00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:24,680 London, the height of it will be like go out the front of the 322 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:27,600 hotel and go, do you want to go such? 323 00:15:27,600 --> 00:15:29,400 And that's not be like, yeah, but we could also just go to 324 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:30,880 this Starbucks. Do you Remember Me? 325 00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:33,440 You and Mickey went to Glasgow for a gig and went to see a 326 00:15:33,440 --> 00:15:35,120 movie at half 10 in the morning. Brilliant. 327 00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:38,640 And the movie was 10 out of 10. It was differ from American. 328 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:40,000 Pie the goon. Yeah. 329 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:41,440 And it was like an ice hockey movie. 330 00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:42,840 Massively underrated movie it was. 331 00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:44,520 Class yeah, I was like, this is the best. 332 00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:46,640 And then we came out of that being like, let's, let's go to 333 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:48,120 this gig. And then we're like, it's half 334 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,480 11 in the morning. I tried that again a few years 335 00:15:50,480 --> 00:15:51,440 later. Right. 336 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:54,080 I want to see Venom, right? And I just, I just remember 337 00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:56,160 getting about 8 phone calls during it in the morning. 338 00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:58,720 Like I had to go out and be like hello, yeah, I just missed the 339 00:15:58,720 --> 00:16:00,480 whole movie really. Yeah, I don't think I missed 340 00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:03,440 much, but. Me and Dave were at the Fringe 341 00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:06,240 and went to see anything that was on real early in the 342 00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:07,840 morning, and we couldn't check in yet. 343 00:16:08,120 --> 00:16:10,200 And it was a movie. It was like about twisters, but 344 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,800 hurricanes. And there was just a real 345 00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:14,880 emotional storyline. And me and him both nearly cried 346 00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:17,560 during it, and I just weren't right for the rest of the day. 347 00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:20,080 So yeah, I think we should do like a dot like Nilescomb. 348 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,440 We should do a dungeon tour. He'll probably want to go to 349 00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:25,000 Harley Street and get fillers or something. 350 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,760 You know, like get a little bit of rearrangement done on the 351 00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:28,320 face. But. 352 00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:30,840 Get a bit of tox. Yeah, a bit of Botox. 353 00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:33,200 But I don't know, like what's your, what's your vibe like? 354 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,760 What do you see? Do you see us like? 355 00:16:35,040 --> 00:16:37,520 I mean, my vibe is like, you know, let's do exciting things, 356 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:40,960 but then the reality of London is you get on 2 tubes and you're 357 00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:43,520 just like, I wouldn't need cocaine now. 358 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,520 Yeah, that's why everyone in this city is on. 359 00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:47,160 Gear Alton Towers like. A knock? 360 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:50,240 Where's that in London? Don't know, that's a challenge. 361 00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:51,480 You're like, let's go. Where do you want to go, 362 00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,040 Butlins? It's where's in London, but it's 363 00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:54,240 like it's England, you know what I mean? 364 00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:57,600 Like it's like Belfast. We could get to it, We could get 365 00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,520 to it. I'm sure there's something like 366 00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:01,000 Brighton. Yeah, yeah. 367 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,360 That's. Just a trip somewhere. 368 00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:05,480 OK. What we'll do, I don't know. 369 00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:07,760 I'll tell you right now, we'll just go for like 2 pints 370 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:08,680 somewhere. Yeah, yeah. 371 00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:12,200 They'll be like get a carvery and then not not do the gig. 372 00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:15,319 Carvery Yeah, Where are you, fucking Tyrone? 373 00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:19,119 I bring my own plate. They're like Partridge 12 inch 374 00:17:19,119 --> 00:17:23,480 plate. Bring your own fucking bread, 375 00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:26,119 probably. Last Oh yeah 100% be bringing my 376 00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:27,599 own bread. Will you break? 377 00:17:27,599 --> 00:17:29,320 Will you bring any supplements with you know, will you bring 378 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:33,360 anything with you to on this trip like fucking sachets of. 379 00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:35,440 I'll bring a sachet of almond butter from a. 380 00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:36,240 Almond. Butter. 381 00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:37,600 Yep, from a porridge in the morning. 382 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:40,520 Need to get oats? You put the butter. 383 00:17:41,120 --> 00:17:43,080 In the porridge, No. I get something to do for me, 384 00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:44,640 but I have it. Yeah. 385 00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:47,600 Almond butter and porridge. Porridge, berries, banana, 386 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,280 almond butter. Straight in. 387 00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:51,640 Mix it all together. Oh, right. 388 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:53,120 Sorry. I was getting very confused 389 00:17:53,120 --> 00:17:54,120 there. What were you thinking? 390 00:17:54,120 --> 00:17:55,360 I'm like peanut, like a nut butter. 391 00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:57,120 All right, I thought. I thought it was like some sort 392 00:17:57,120 --> 00:18:01,880 of butter replacement. Just me with a big pound of 393 00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:04,120 Curry made walking through London. 394 00:18:04,120 --> 00:18:06,640 Got to get the cows in somehow, you know what I mean? 395 00:18:07,640 --> 00:18:09,480 And yeah, I know it's going to be fun. 396 00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:13,200 Leicester Square Theatre, which is like any event, any times 397 00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:15,240 we've done London before, like separately or? 398 00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:16,840 Together. So did you say your agent was 399 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:18,360 going to come and then he had to leave by 10? 400 00:18:18,760 --> 00:18:21,880 Something like that. Something like that, Yeah. 401 00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:24,080 Have you met this guy before? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 402 00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:26,440 What's his name? His name is well, I don't know. 403 00:18:26,440 --> 00:18:28,400 He's just he hang. He's from Soho. 404 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:31,560 Just a guy that's come to see me and says he's got big plans. 405 00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:33,440 No, yeah, no. I'm. 406 00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:35,600 Going to get you some good work. Yeah, no, no, no. 407 00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:37,760 Yeah, He's going to abroad. He's going to come see the set 408 00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:40,320 because I did that thing of thinking, well, anyone who lives 409 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:43,160 in England can just come to the show and it'll be handy. 410 00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:45,800 And then he's like, I live 100 miles away or whatever. 411 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:50,520 So, yeah, see my set go because she'll start half nine. 412 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:53,160 Yeah, that's late. Does he want to hang around and 413 00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:59,880 get in our client? I'd get the photo like if you 414 00:18:59,880 --> 00:19:03,600 could maybe lose like fucking 50 lbs and get hair transplant, 415 00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:10,160 come back looking like fucking Harvey Price because I, you 416 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,720 know, I would get an offer. What a die. 417 00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:17,360 Last week in the studio, I see of Jordan Robinson's head did. 418 00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:18,840 You wash it first. That was my concern. 419 00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:21,280 Luscious, Luscious. Luscious. 420 00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:24,560 Yeah, real nice. And I'll tell you what I'm going 421 00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:28,360 to say this very clean ears. Really, very clean ears. 422 00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:30,280 Yeah. You probably know if you're 423 00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:32,960 going to get your head shaved on a podcast, you will do a bit of 424 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:35,760 work beforehand. But like, Oh yeah, real nice. 425 00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:38,400 I've got very clean ears. It's all right. 426 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:39,760 No hair? There's no. 427 00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:40,920 Is that what? You're going to say to my agent. 428 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:44,200 One of my main pleasures in life is putting one of those cotton 429 00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,600 blood things down my pesser and then. 430 00:19:49,440 --> 00:19:50,680 I couldn't do that in a million years. 431 00:19:51,120 --> 00:19:54,680 Put it in yourself. No, no, I'd be a fear, like 432 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:57,280 hitting something like a wee bit of my brain or you know. 433 00:19:57,840 --> 00:19:59,480 There's plenty. There's a bit more to travel 434 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:01,080 before it hit your brain, you know what I mean? 435 00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:04,360 Fuck sake. No, it's a nice feeling but I've 436 00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:06,800 I've never had any do. Your eyes go back up in your 437 00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:08,080 head like the undertaker when you do it. 438 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:13,960 Yeah, because you're like, oh, at the same time, that's the 439 00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,000 thing. If you had a cotton button, your 440 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:17,560 ear, you'd get like sucked off and figured in the ass. 441 00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:21,440 You would just die of pleasure. That's where you want to go? 442 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:25,680 Yeah, like. On the top like Elvis and I'm 443 00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:28,360 not eating. I'm just like 2 of them coming 444 00:20:28,360 --> 00:20:33,080 over here. You go for a COVID test. 445 00:20:33,120 --> 00:20:38,200 Every day I arrive on my own. Like in my ears already. 446 00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:41,120 Go ahead. I haven't had a COVID test yet. 447 00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:45,400 That's all right. You want to get one. 448 00:20:49,360 --> 00:20:50,800 Yeah, you shaved his head. What was he? 449 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:52,560 What was he donating? The two fucking? 450 00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:57,960 Princesses trust, I think, which is like they they make wigs, 451 00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:00,560 kid, they make wigs, which is very nice. 452 00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,120 He said to me. He said to me it has to be at 453 00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,640 least nine inches. Right. 454 00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:12,480 And I went What about the hair? I am so. 455 00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:15,280 Comedy, you know. I did my own COVID test for a 456 00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:18,240 while a couple of times and then had to get it done and the 457 00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:21,560 difference in the amount of application you put into your 458 00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:24,360 own and then when someone does it the railway is night and day. 459 00:21:24,360 --> 00:21:26,680 So I was like this is fine why are people complaining? 460 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:29,960 Got it done somewhere before like travelling and the cotton 461 00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,200 but had my tonsils and nearly vomited and a lot of people. 462 00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:34,920 What were you done before? Just like put it in. 463 00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:36,560 You're also like. Oh, yeah, touch. 464 00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:38,520 I don't have, like, touching it just a bit. 465 00:21:38,520 --> 00:21:42,160 And they're like right up there. Yeah, they're Stephen, Stephen 466 00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:44,040 Davis, you know, fully, like fully. 467 00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:51,160 Go for the wee bit of chalk, yeah, but no, the the when. 468 00:21:51,200 --> 00:21:53,640 When it's done properly, it's absolutely brutal. 469 00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:55,160 Do we have to do anything ahead of London? 470 00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:57,240 Do you have to like register in something or something? 471 00:21:57,240 --> 00:21:59,600 No, no, no, no, no. We just got to show up and look 472 00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:01,600 good. OK, That's all we've got to do. 473 00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:06,200 Have you had any weird airport sort of things in your? 474 00:22:06,360 --> 00:22:08,040 There's nothing, There's nothing. 475 00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:10,720 You just travel as normal. I think it's if you're going 476 00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:14,960 somewhere far, you know, if you're going, if you're going 477 00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:16,840 Turkey. In the far away. 478 00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:19,640 If you're going far away, but if you're going closely close, you 479 00:22:19,640 --> 00:22:21,680 don't have to do anything. It's just normal. 480 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,760 Class never tell you about the time I was coming through 481 00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:27,640 Belfast International which if they knew I'd be happy with the 482 00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:30,000 guy. You know there's like the ex cop 483 00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:33,200 on the fucking podium. Pretend that he's a policeman. 484 00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:39,360 All right with that podium. Well this dude was like. 485 00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:42,200 You mean as you as you walk? There's like a fake cop who 486 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:44,600 probably like was drinking on the job and they're like, we 487 00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:47,120 can't sack you, but you fucking you can work in the airport for 488 00:22:47,120 --> 00:22:48,920 your sins. He's like, could you stop this 489 00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:49,960 way, please, Sir? And I was. 490 00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:52,160 Like that's how they all. Talk. 491 00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:54,120 Oh yeah. And I literally had a bit of 492 00:22:54,120 --> 00:22:56,560 camera gear with me and all and I had to take everything out and 493 00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:58,720 they were all fucking hoping through it and then stuffed it 494 00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:02,080 all back in. The guy goes, do you start with 495 00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:04,000 her place, Sir? And I was like fucking here we 496 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:08,400 go and I walked over and he goes here there's a rumour that to 497 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:10,120 buy the blenders loose in the airport. 498 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:15,400 I was like, I hope 9 ISIS walk behind me and fucking bomb this 499 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:18,440 shit hole and it's your fault Derek. 500 00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:23,360 And I was literally like short rude to him. 501 00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:30,000 Like I was like rude to him. I was just like, OK. 502 00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:32,320 How does he think? How does he want you to respond 503 00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:33,520 to that? I don't know, but it's probably 504 00:23:33,520 --> 00:23:35,800 one of the scenarios if you're just like fuck off with like if 505 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:37,880 you're perfectly within your rights, just like get the fuck 506 00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:39,720 out of my face. He'd be like, here, let's let's 507 00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:41,240 not attitude. Stop resisting. 508 00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:43,280 I'd like it if he went like through. 509 00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:45,640 So he kept you for an hour and a half before he said that, you 510 00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,800 know what I mean? Like full cheques, how many 511 00:23:47,800 --> 00:23:50,760 searches and then said it? I've had that a few times, You 512 00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:53,120 know, like someone's, you know, fucking finger in your asshole 513 00:23:53,120 --> 00:23:55,880 in that tube. And then they're just like, love 514 00:23:55,880 --> 00:23:58,080 the videos, by the way. Oh, right, yeah, like. 515 00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:00,120 What do you think of? What do you think I'm smuggling? 516 00:24:00,120 --> 00:24:01,600 Through here. Yeah, Panther. 517 00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:05,200 To Glasgow, yeah. Excuse me Sir, I seem to have 518 00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:07,400 found a lot of punch lines in your pockets. 519 00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:14,680 I'll be like, that's joints. Anything to declare ponds you 520 00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:18,920 know How many do you want? And they're like, I used to do 521 00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:22,800 material about it, but everybody, I mean, in that 522 00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:25,600 airport, I mean, you wouldn't get a job anywhere else, like, 523 00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:26,840 right, You wouldn't be qualified. 524 00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,040 I go city. I just go to city. 525 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:33,000 Yeah, it's less hassle. Shutter planes, less hassle. 526 00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:37,960 But like cuter places, there's never anything good in airports. 527 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:41,520 You know, you might get the odd JD Sports or something like 528 00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:43,800 that, but that's why. Dixons are like a Dixons. 529 00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:46,080 Are we Dixons? Is good you get yourself a Jack 530 00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:50,640 or something. Now I bought the What do you 531 00:24:50,640 --> 00:24:52,080 call them? It's gonna say waterproof. 532 00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:53,960 What do you call them? The sound cancel headphones the 533 00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:56,400 wrong place. I got sound cancel and 534 00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:58,480 headphones in there one day and it was like it was the best 535 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:00,160 purchase of. International Airport, Yeah, I 536 00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:02,440 did the exact same thing. Fucking the guy switched them on 537 00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:04,160 that just. I heard nothing. 538 00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:06,720 I was like, what was him doing? Unbelievable. 539 00:25:07,560 --> 00:25:10,000 And then just like it changed air travel for me forever. 540 00:25:10,120 --> 00:25:11,240 Yeah. Because you were on a plane like 541 00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:13,120 it, it makes you a bit more stressed because it's like 542 00:25:14,320 --> 00:25:16,720 everyone's talking about and he just, it goes away and you're 543 00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:18,200 like, I'm just sitting on a seat here. 544 00:25:18,320 --> 00:25:20,600 Yeah, I'm ground. Yeah, not even not listening to 545 00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:22,200 anything, just. Sometimes not, no. 546 00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,680 Yeah, I I'm just exactly and I got my in both international 547 00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:26,920 report too. Nice. 548 00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:29,160 Which is that free baby shout outs? 549 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:30,720 Fucking great. Although let's not wear 550 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:34,040 headphones on the way over because let's talk, let's chat, 551 00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:37,160 I'll be. They're not shitty flights 552 00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:38,320 either. They're isn't like middle of the 553 00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:40,040 day kind of. And then, Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 554 00:25:40,120 --> 00:25:41,440 If it was like I used to do that. 555 00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:42,840 The seven in the morning, you're like, don't. 556 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,920 Fucking anytime I was going to London, I'd do the like 5:50 AM 557 00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:48,680 flight because it was 7 quite cheaper. 558 00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:49,920 Oh yeah. And then get there and go. 559 00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:51,920 I don't know anyone in this city and nothing's open. 560 00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:54,000 Yeah. So I was just down there for a 561 00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:55,440 long time. So now I. 562 00:25:55,760 --> 00:26:00,080 Hate that later flights I gotta be ditching the bags. 563 00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:02,320 Ditch in the luggage and then I'll walk about. 564 00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:03,960 Yeah, ditch in the bags name you're on. 565 00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:08,680 Yeah, ditch in the bags, bro. Yeah, I can't be Arsh for that. 566 00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:11,440 You. Definitely learn how to travel 567 00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:13,760 better as you get a bit older as well. 568 00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:15,800 Yeah, I don't like, I don't like this. 569 00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:17,960 You know, we'll go out and see what we find. 570 00:26:18,120 --> 00:26:19,280 Yeah. Look on the end. 571 00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:22,480 You can look my just and you know, like you can select 572 00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:24,800 certain places and that's fine for that trip. 573 00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:26,680 Yeah. You're not going to see all of 574 00:26:26,680 --> 00:26:28,920 London in fucking an afternoon. No, we are. 575 00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:31,480 We're going to see Alton Tarsh going to drive 7 hours. 576 00:26:31,480 --> 00:26:32,040 I'm going to. Google. 577 00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:33,680 I'm going to see what that is right now. 578 00:26:34,320 --> 00:26:40,280 What keys Keynes? Milton Keynes? 579 00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:42,600 What's Milton Keynes I? Think it's Milton Keynes. 580 00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:44,920 Milton Keynes sounds like maybe a guy who would facilitate the 581 00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:47,160 trip. All right, mate, Milton Keynes, 582 00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:49,880 OH. Milton Keynes, jump in. 583 00:26:50,880 --> 00:26:54,160 I'll tell you everywhere mate, what are you looking for on 584 00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:55,600 towers now, mate? You want to. 585 00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:57,760 Meet my mate Charlie on Milton Keynes. 586 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:06,760 He's got the keys, he's got the. Signal the kings Keys are kings. 587 00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:12,040 It's Kings Kings Reggae Festival that word what our town. 588 00:27:12,040 --> 00:27:15,000 Towers, Alton Towers that. Sounds like another guy. 589 00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,840 Even if we get Milton, Keyes and Alton. 590 00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:20,000 Towers, yeah, it's fucking miles away, man. 591 00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:21,840 Yeah, we can do it. Yeah, 3. 592 00:27:22,120 --> 00:27:23,240 Fucking. That's good. 593 00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:26,640 We get there at 1, the gigs at 9:00, we could just get there. 594 00:27:26,720 --> 00:27:30,760 Walter Straight back on strip, back on the Milton Keys, Vespa, 595 00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:35,280 the three of us on the back. Me just crushing the suspension 596 00:27:35,280 --> 00:27:39,000 into the floor. I'll just walk beside this for 597 00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:40,840 fuck sake. You boys want to do the ghost 598 00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:42,400 tour? Oh yes, please, Milton. 599 00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:51,520 Milton Keynes. Go to beers, mate, Go to fucking 600 00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:56,880 beers. Just fucking usually the clip 601 00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:59,680 your man in the EUR was like in a big bag of coke and he's like, 602 00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:02,160 you take a big fucking giant bump on the key and he'd be 603 00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:06,920 like, oh, and the whole crowds are doing that and just fucking 604 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:08,560 hoof the whole load of it. Do you know? 605 00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:11,520 How did he not die? Because he took like fucking 606 00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:15,640 just massive, massive bumps. He's like yeah, good. 607 00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:20,000 Cracking it my. When my O'Donnell was managing 608 00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:23,000 A-Team like 2 years ago in Argentina, he clearly had such a 609 00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:26,240 Co connection that he needed to do it on the sideline during 610 00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,000 this like game. Did you ever see the footage of 611 00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,880 like 8 of his assistant coaches which he would like give a nod 612 00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,600 and they would form like a ring around them and I'll pretend 613 00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:36,840 they were like watching the match? 614 00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:39,320 So he was not there. Standing and then he would do 615 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:41,400 the and then go back to the go back to managing. 616 00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:43,560 Fucking hell. I mean, that's the word. 617 00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:46,240 I mean, you know, you know them South Americans are like for 618 00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:48,440 their Coke, love it. And then also. 619 00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:51,520 That goes for bonds. Filled sodas. 620 00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:54,040 But he, you know, like he obviously has the worst thing 621 00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:56,320 you can have is money probably right Yeah. 622 00:28:56,760 --> 00:28:58,920 So he's just like. And yes man, all around you. 623 00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:03,600 Know stocking it up he'd be like this is my coke garage yeah just 624 00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:04,000 full of. Coke. 625 00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:07,440 And like anyone who has it, when they see him, oh, you have to, 626 00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:10,360 you know, have some of mine. It's probably like Paul, 627 00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:12,280 Hollywood is walking, you know, walk past the bakery. 628 00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:14,880 Oh, Paul, try this. Yeah, you know, we'd be a veto 629 00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:16,080 or something. He's like, I'm fucking. 630 00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:18,760 Barn brat Bloated. Yeah, you're like, eat that. 631 00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:20,960 Yeah. Do you see that documentary 632 00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:22,800 Cocaine Cowboy? Well, it's a series now on 633 00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:25,160 Netflix. There was an old documentary 634 00:29:25,160 --> 00:29:27,040 about Miami and all the cops and all. 635 00:29:27,680 --> 00:29:30,080 And now there was there's a series on Netflix about the 636 00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:32,680 actual dealers and stuff. And there's just they're really 637 00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:36,480 into like speedboat racing and had one guy and he literally 638 00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:41,040 like couldn't look more like he's from the 80s Miami, like 639 00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:43,080 sweaty hair. It's stuck to his head and big 640 00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:45,200 passion off. And he's there like interviewing 641 00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,600 people and he's literally, oh, yeah, how do you get on His jaw 642 00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:50,360 is like all over the place. Got our winner here today. 643 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:52,760 Just fucking sweat passion off him. 644 00:29:52,760 --> 00:29:54,080 Like, just didn't hide it at all. 645 00:29:54,240 --> 00:29:55,680 Yeah, just everybody's wiped out. 646 00:29:55,800 --> 00:29:58,040 But like, like you say, having so much money that you just, Oh, 647 00:29:58,040 --> 00:29:59,960 yeah, it's like Pablo Escobar having a zoo. 648 00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:01,680 Yeah, you should watch that documentary. 649 00:30:01,840 --> 00:30:02,960 Everyone's like, I don't know, man. 650 00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:06,320 I was like 21 years old and I was lifting about 21 million a 651 00:30:06,320 --> 00:30:08,200 week. And then he's like, I didn't 652 00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:10,720 even think I was a criminal. I was just, I was just driving a 653 00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:13,320 boat full of drugs to another place and you're like, yeah, 654 00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:15,520 drug trafficking, you fucking idiot. 655 00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:17,520 They put me in gaol for 24 years. 656 00:30:17,520 --> 00:30:19,080 I was like, what's what? Why? 657 00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:23,640 I basically just drive a boat. I don't understand this. 658 00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:26,920 And you're like, it had a street value of 200 fucking million or 659 00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:29,640 something. When you watch programmes like 660 00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:32,080 that and you hear the street value, it makes you realise it 661 00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:35,360 here, OK, there's a problem, but it isn't really when you 662 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:38,680 consider the street values when they're like PS and I have, I 663 00:30:38,680 --> 00:30:42,000 have a seizure of £77. Yeah, but they'll put up a photo 664 00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:45,040 of like, you know, like a fucking wee 5 bag of weight, 665 00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:49,800 like lesson we're taking down the fucking the kingpins around 666 00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:52,520 here and it's basically just a fella that was smoking a joint 667 00:30:52,520 --> 00:30:55,640 on the corner. Yeah, I've got a question. 668 00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:58,000 I thought you were going to go. It's funny you mentioned that 669 00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:00,080 we're going to mention drugs. We're going to do a little 670 00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:03,120 tasting. Yeah, I've got questions here. 671 00:31:03,360 --> 00:31:06,760 You're a big man for the wait. Oh, big big for. 672 00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:12,240 I enjoyed a bit like but then you have a baby and you're like, 673 00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:15,160 this can't be. Yeah, I prioritise sleep over 674 00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:17,000 everything. Over everything. 675 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:19,640 That's your album. Sleep over everything. 676 00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:23,640 Wait, Josh says. Which Northern Irish celebrity 677 00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:27,000 or public figure would be best suited for first minister? 678 00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:34,800 I mean, I don't. Joe Rogan It would be someone 679 00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:37,440 being dragged into it reluctantly sensible. 680 00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:38,840 Here they're like, I don't want anything to do with that. 681 00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:40,720 And you're like, do it for the people. 682 00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:43,200 It'd be somebody that isn't the celebrity. 683 00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:44,960 It'd need to be someone who just wants to go on. 684 00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:48,160 Notice those sort of people, you know, that are like Liam Neeson 685 00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,000 not looking? I don't know. 686 00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,160 I think if Lemon is the first minister, I think it would work 687 00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:54,880 out quite well for us. But if you were, if you were a 688 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:57,440 different colour, I think. He was he a racialist? 689 00:31:57,600 --> 00:32:00,000 No, but remember he gave an interview and he said the term 690 00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:04,280 in a in a context, he said the term black bastard, didn't he? 691 00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:10,320 He said he was, he said he was his friend got attacked by a 692 00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:13,720 black person. And then he said I was looking 693 00:32:13,720 --> 00:32:16,560 to go out and I think the phrase you used was and kill a black 694 00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:19,360 bastard. And then I think he's that old 695 00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:23,480 that he probably forgot to give a bit more detail of what he was 696 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:23,840 saying. I. 697 00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:27,520 Know people are like, you know, it's not, it's not worrying that 698 00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:31,400 he was going to kill a person. It's that he said block bastard. 699 00:32:31,920 --> 00:32:35,360 I was gonna get this block bastard and kill their whole 700 00:32:35,360 --> 00:32:36,440 family. Yeah. 701 00:32:36,440 --> 00:32:37,480 And then they were looking I'm like. 702 00:32:37,480 --> 00:32:39,600 Did you say Black Bastard? And finished the story. 703 00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:41,840 And then he just, he's that old. He just moved on talking about 704 00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:43,840 other stuff, you know? Yeah. 705 00:32:44,560 --> 00:32:46,800 I'm passing in my pants. But I don't know. 706 00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:48,400 Can you do Liam makes an impression. 707 00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:51,200 I don't know. I don't think so. 708 00:32:52,360 --> 00:32:55,800 Negative. Maybe I can something like that? 709 00:32:56,840 --> 00:33:03,600 Oh, that bet that everyone does. Amory says What are the bromance 710 00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:06,000 plans for London? I can't stop coughing that Miss 711 00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:10,400 Mike is cool. I think we I'd like to do 712 00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:12,160 something. The bromance plans. 713 00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,680 Yeah. But we're going to make a sex 714 00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:18,760 tape and fill cinematic 4K. Yeah, let's do that. 715 00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:24,880 Three cameras, yeah. Milton Keynes in the middle of 716 00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:27,720 it. I love it lad. 717 00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:30,880 Good. Here it comes. 718 00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:36,320 Yes. More white lines. 719 00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:39,440 Milton Keyes does PR for Faces nightclub in Essex. 720 00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:43,720 But yeah, I think the plan. I'm going to take you for like 721 00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:46,480 some food that you do not want. I was just about to say, just 722 00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:48,000 fucking look at your face all the time. 723 00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:50,640 I was going to say, I think I would like to have some nice 724 00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:51,840 food. Yeah, yeah. 725 00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:53,680 No. So I'll you do you put on some 726 00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:56,640 sort of cuisine tour around London and I'll just follow 727 00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:59,560 behind and watch. You, I want to think we should 728 00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:03,240 go some Asian places and see what you can, you can. 729 00:34:03,760 --> 00:34:07,160 Half and half, yeah. No nice stuff. 730 00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:08,679 Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah. 731 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:10,000 Jeep mate. Yeah. 732 00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:12,719 Any types of mate? Any types of mate? 733 00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:16,120 Red mates all good now. All good in moderation, but a 734 00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:19,159 welfare in London. Well, yeah, the, the meal, you 735 00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:22,639 know, there's, you know, a restaurant meal will be in 736 00:34:22,639 --> 00:34:24,800 moderation. Yeah, they don't go like here's 737 00:34:24,800 --> 00:34:28,440 a few chips and a bit of thing and then like 4 1/2 kilos of 738 00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:29,320 brisket. Yeah. 739 00:34:29,560 --> 00:34:31,960 No, I like that. I like. 740 00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:34,719 They control it on a plate. Do you like BBQ food? 741 00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:38,480 You know. American style. 742 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:40,280 Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you can get it, I'll give it 743 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:41,120 a go. Yeah, I like. 744 00:34:41,159 --> 00:34:42,760 That it's hard to come across. I like that. 745 00:34:43,199 --> 00:34:44,520 Well see that that is a lot of meat. 746 00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:47,000 I know a few BBQ. There you go, he's live in 747 00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:47,920 London. Ohio. 748 00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:50,080 Yeah. I like that. 749 00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:52,880 I also think it's handy. That's handy to have someone who 750 00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:55,760 knows the city because you spend so much time, like, fucking 751 00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:59,000 about and going from here to here when you could have just 752 00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:00,120 walked it. You know, you take public 753 00:35:00,120 --> 00:35:02,320 transport, you do that. You know, you go down the 754 00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:05,440 underground station, you come up after 45 minutes and go, all 755 00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:07,400 right, I can see where I was. Yeah. 756 00:35:07,640 --> 00:35:09,360 And that kind of thing, sweating and stinking. 757 00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:12,720 Yeah, I want to pack. I want to pack in fun, but not 758 00:35:12,720 --> 00:35:13,880 too much fun so that we're tired. 759 00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:16,600 Do you know much of A rat race London is? 760 00:35:16,600 --> 00:35:19,320 I got off a tube once and this guy was kind of running and he 761 00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:24,200 just swerved and collapsed and I went like real hard, not real 762 00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:25,800 hard tile floor. Down there. 763 00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:28,120 And I ran over and I was like, you alright, mate? 764 00:35:28,720 --> 00:35:31,080 And I lifted him up and he was like, he was like, sorry, I need 765 00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:33,440 a briefcase that he was going up like rushing to work and he was 766 00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:35,440 sorry. It's just I have this brain 767 00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:36,840 tumour and it makes me a bit dizzy. 768 00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:40,280 And he just had chairs and he ran on and I was like, that's 769 00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:42,400 London for you. Like the guy doesn't even 770 00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:45,840 fucking stop for a minute because he has a fucking brain 771 00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:47,280 tumour. He's like, I don't get in 772 00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:51,520 because it's important to me that in life that I get there 773 00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:53,480 for 9:00. I have a brain tumour, can I get 774 00:35:53,480 --> 00:35:55,240 next Wednesday off to get this left up? 775 00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:59,280 Just. Coming out, it'll be all right. 776 00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:01,200 Yeah, it's got to say, mate, it's a bit of an eyesore. 777 00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:03,680 Yeah, my eye is sore. In fact, I'm blind. 778 00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:05,600 The pace of life there wouldn't. Wouldn't. 779 00:36:05,760 --> 00:36:06,960 And people just stepping over him. 780 00:36:07,360 --> 00:36:09,320 Yeah, no, that that doesn't suit me out there. 781 00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:12,080 Nah, fuck that. You know, and especially on the 782 00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:13,960 tube as well. I would get like a fucking, you 783 00:36:13,960 --> 00:36:16,920 know, blocked nose and I'd be like, there's more to life than 784 00:36:16,920 --> 00:36:19,560 work. You got to live your life, man. 785 00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:22,920 Matthew says. Who's your favourite up and 786 00:36:22,920 --> 00:36:24,680 coming comedian from Northern Ireland? 787 00:36:25,240 --> 00:36:33,600 You, I'd say. Me and Roy Walker. 788 00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:36,760 I mean, there's no, there is no like up and coming now because 789 00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:39,400 it's like someone will just do you something out of nowhere and 790 00:36:39,400 --> 00:36:40,360 they'll be like, oh, there they go. 791 00:36:40,360 --> 00:36:42,800 Fucking fucking 200,000 followers on tech talk. 792 00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:45,720 Or something, you know, it's like it's mad how quick you can 793 00:36:45,720 --> 00:36:48,160 just get into it. There's no like people must look 794 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:51,200 at stand up here and think, you know, do you spend year? 795 00:36:51,240 --> 00:36:55,240 And that was probably the case a decade ago, you know, would and 796 00:36:55,240 --> 00:36:58,440 there wasn't social media as it is, it would take you a lot 797 00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:02,720 longer to get gigs. But now, like you look at 798 00:37:02,880 --> 00:37:07,240 someone like Johnny Bowie did lotteries last week, like Johnny 799 00:37:07,240 --> 00:37:10,160 was doing it years ago and then stopped for about 7 years and 800 00:37:10,160 --> 00:37:11,560 he's doing it again. So it's almost like he's 801 00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:14,560 starting again. But he's really good and he has 802 00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:17,080 a defined act. He's got one liners that are 803 00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:20,040 excellent. He wears a suit like he he knows 804 00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:23,560 his sort of character for stand up and he's getting gigs left, 805 00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:26,240 right and centre. But and it's almost like he's 806 00:37:26,240 --> 00:37:28,440 just started. That's just because he's good. 807 00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:33,480 Yeah, I think for me he's probably the best up and coming 808 00:37:33,480 --> 00:37:38,160 comedian because I, I mean, you spend a long time figuring out 809 00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:41,960 how you look on stage and just getting comfortable and that 810 00:37:41,960 --> 00:37:44,440 sort of thing. And especially him doing like 1 811 00:37:44,440 --> 00:37:46,920 liners. It's easy to get to think. 812 00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:49,240 I've got to start to do stories and they have to do this Did. 813 00:37:49,320 --> 00:37:52,400 He start like that though. Was he doing like bits and stuff 814 00:37:52,400 --> 00:37:54,080 at the start? I might be wrong, I think he was 815 00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:55,960 doing bits and stories and stuff. 816 00:37:56,040 --> 00:37:59,000 Well, it's good that you've sort of you figure it out like 817 00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:01,640 because you could easily, you know, look around you and be 818 00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:04,800 like, well, there's Mickey and potty and forget you whatever 819 00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:07,360 and be like, oh, they do like material and bits. 820 00:38:07,360 --> 00:38:08,800 Yeah, I think you have to do that. 821 00:38:08,800 --> 00:38:12,280 And then you're like, but I have like fucking 200 jokes line here 822 00:38:12,280 --> 00:38:15,040 that I just write when I'm at work and no, it's good. 823 00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:20,760 I mean, you know, there's people like, I mean obviously like 824 00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:24,000 Jordy and there's all the obvious go to ones that like we 825 00:38:24,000 --> 00:38:26,640 would have support because, you know, they're just good. 826 00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:30,240 Jordy's had some gigs like even at the limenight where like 827 00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:34,560 Mickey Open, then Jordan Robinson was on and murders like 828 00:38:34,560 --> 00:38:36,920 just hit whatever the sweet spot of time was. 829 00:38:37,040 --> 00:38:39,520 Yeah, fucking murdered. And then they get too drunk and 830 00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:41,560 then I go on and I'm like, oh, there's fucking just nothing 831 00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:43,800 left for me. Like and he got that sweet 832 00:38:43,800 --> 00:38:45,560 window. But the best thing is they want 833 00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:48,240 a gig so much like that. Yeah, they're just there all the 834 00:38:48,240 --> 00:38:49,880 time. More than anything like. 835 00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:52,760 William and Jordan and all them ones, like they were just. 836 00:38:53,520 --> 00:38:54,800 Which is sort of the way to do it. 837 00:38:54,800 --> 00:39:00,000 Like, you know, in the comedy world, it's like, if you, like, 838 00:39:00,000 --> 00:39:04,000 make yourself useful, Yeah. Which is like the oldest fucking 839 00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:06,400 thing in the book. Like, But if you're just around 840 00:39:06,400 --> 00:39:09,040 and you've done a few gigs and you're always there and it 841 00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:10,800 happened to wait him a few times, I was just like, do you 842 00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:14,280 want AMC Lavery's? And he literally like high 5 843 00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:16,040 James McKechnie, like fucking sweet. 844 00:39:16,040 --> 00:39:19,000 But you know, like class. And I'm just like, no, it's just 845 00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:20,560 because I want to do a set and can't be ours doing it. 846 00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:23,120 But yeah, but that sort of thing. 847 00:39:23,160 --> 00:39:25,160 But even things like. If you were to send it home 848 00:39:25,160 --> 00:39:28,080 going, Carl never asked me to do every. 849 00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:30,800 You'll never get asked. It's like, yeah, be into it. 850 00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:32,600 Be there, like. Because there's that thing of 851 00:39:32,600 --> 00:39:35,440 like even just announcing someone on an off stage, Mike, 852 00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:37,240 who would you bring? Would you just announce Mike 853 00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:40,040 being able to just be there and you want them to do that and 854 00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:41,840 sort of weed? Like I remember going to fucking 855 00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:46,080 countless stand up nights. I was saying that Damon, Damon 856 00:39:46,080 --> 00:39:49,680 Clark, like he was, but the first ever like local gay guy 857 00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:53,520 went their second movie was in the black box and he was on. 858 00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:55,720 And I remember just like, you know, you don't you don't even 859 00:39:55,720 --> 00:39:57,080 know that you could do this in Belfast. 860 00:39:57,080 --> 00:39:58,560 And I'm just like, who where the fuck? 861 00:39:59,320 --> 00:40:02,240 He was unbelievable at the time, like the crash test dummy. 862 00:40:02,240 --> 00:40:06,240 And I was like, this is nuts. But you got to go and just be 863 00:40:06,240 --> 00:40:08,280 around these places. And there is a lot of comedy 864 00:40:08,280 --> 00:40:12,520 people who do comedy who are like, you know, they, they shit 865 00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:14,520 on like laveries or something that God, it's all the same 866 00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:16,200 people and blah, blah. And you're like, yeah, I don't 867 00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:18,160 know anyone else. Yeah, yeah, I've never seen you 868 00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:20,440 do stand up. I've never, you're never around. 869 00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:22,400 You're just at home complaining that you're not getting gigs. 870 00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:25,240 And all these other guys are actually into it. 871 00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:30,120 Yeah, there's no point where you should stop asking for gigs like 872 00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:32,320 I'll. I'll still say to you here, 873 00:40:32,320 --> 00:40:35,200 could I do a library soon? Or it's both like I'll ask you. 874 00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:37,720 You know, because I'll take a look at the lineup somebody like 875 00:40:37,720 --> 00:40:39,840 right, we're we're cycling these round. 876 00:40:40,120 --> 00:40:42,560 I'll give XI in a shout, but yeah, you'll fucking you'll ask 877 00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:45,640 for a 10 minute spot. Or you'll say something like 878 00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:48,280 here, I'm doing this, if I come around, could I also get 5 879 00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:50,520 minutes? It's that wanting to perform. 880 00:40:50,560 --> 00:40:54,520 And that's why I think the crowd of people that you would call 881 00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:56,840 relatively new like Jordan and William and all of us you've 882 00:40:56,840 --> 00:40:59,560 done for years, but you would still just because they're 883 00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:01,880 younger, like we'll probably. There are people like, you know, 884 00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:05,080 like fucking McCartney where you like, you can kind of do 885 00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:07,160 everything and he does it really well. 886 00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:10,080 And you're like, fucking. Yes, yeah, yeah. 887 00:41:10,440 --> 00:41:12,320 Because you spend years getting to that. 888 00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:14,520 Point then you feel like that might be an age thing, you know, 889 00:41:14,520 --> 00:41:17,680 like he wasn't, he wasn't super young when he started. 890 00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:20,320 So you kind of already have yourself sorted out of it, you 891 00:41:20,320 --> 00:41:21,760 know. Yourself better supposed to 892 00:41:22,440 --> 00:41:26,040 remember your your first gig. Your first gig was LOL in 893 00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:29,640 Newcastle and you just said like you're saying about someone just 894 00:41:29,640 --> 00:41:32,160 go on here, will you MC this? Will you send that to somebody 895 00:41:32,160 --> 00:41:33,520 who's already done stand up a lot? 896 00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:35,880 So of course it's easy. But we were at a comedy night, 897 00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:39,360 me and Mickey, I just went to watch and you thought about 898 00:41:39,360 --> 00:41:41,920 doing stand up. You're starting to work on bits 899 00:41:42,480 --> 00:41:46,120 and then everybody was just like, just do a set and you did 900 00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:49,680 it short. Said no, no, it was Ryan Hand. 901 00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:52,000 I was just like, we got fucking by the blade on the building 902 00:41:52,000 --> 00:41:54,760 play and it just got me up on stage and I was like hammered. 903 00:41:54,760 --> 00:41:57,240 I was like, what are you doing? Yeah, so I hate him for life. 904 00:41:57,240 --> 00:41:59,360 Do you know what I mean? But. 905 00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:03,360 And I literally said like is I think I said on stage, like is 906 00:42:03,360 --> 00:42:04,920 there another gig in like 2 weeks or something? 907 00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:06,440 I was like, I'll come back and do that one. 908 00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:08,520 Yeah, yeah, when I'm not hammered and actually have 909 00:42:08,520 --> 00:42:10,320 thought about it for 2 minutes. But you did a few minutes. 910 00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:13,280 I remember you did a few minutes and I was like, fuck me, they're 911 00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:15,760 not a mission. I would be able to joke. 912 00:42:15,760 --> 00:42:18,080 But I mean, I suppose you'd started thinking about bits, you 913 00:42:18,080 --> 00:42:19,400 know? It's like your first time you 914 00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:21,680 encountered as a gig, but your first time on stage. 915 00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:23,240 That was bad. Nice shows your first gig. 916 00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:27,720 Pav. Yeah, yeah. 917 00:42:28,920 --> 00:42:31,120 How long did you do 5? 10 minutes. 918 00:42:31,240 --> 00:42:33,920 No, that was good. Yeah, that was the worst thing. 919 00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:35,000 It was actually fucking good. Do you? 920 00:42:35,080 --> 00:42:39,320 Remember who else was on? I think Woodsy maybe right? 921 00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:41,440 I think man Woodsy started like the same day or something. 922 00:42:41,720 --> 00:42:42,440 Oh, right. OK. 923 00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:46,120 And then maybe like the second time it was because we were 924 00:42:46,120 --> 00:42:48,760 doing that Audio Picnic podcast. So like fucking everybody was 925 00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:49,360 on. That's right. 926 00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:51,000 Everybody that was in the building tried it. 927 00:42:52,600 --> 00:42:56,760 And then I've done 2 gigs then. So I was like both of them went 928 00:42:56,760 --> 00:42:59,920 pretty well. So stand ups in the bag. 929 00:42:59,920 --> 00:43:04,080 And then the third gig was like at a remember there was like a 930 00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:06,960 gig in an art gallery around besides John Hewitt. 931 00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:08,960 Marcus Keeley ran it or something? 932 00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:11,800 That's right upstairs. And I was like, I is my third 933 00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:13,680 gig. Just bring your own booze. 934 00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:16,480 I brought about fucking 48 Stella and I was like, I'm only 935 00:43:16,480 --> 00:43:17,640 new. They're going to put me on 1st 936 00:43:17,640 --> 00:43:20,040 and they're like, Oh yeah, you can go on like second last for 937 00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:24,640 like Rory Ward and I. No, I would still eat shed of 938 00:43:24,640 --> 00:43:26,760 the gig like that because they're all just smoking 939 00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:29,400 licorice rollies and fucking wearing their vegan shoes gone. 940 00:43:30,120 --> 00:43:35,280 Did you just say she? Did you actually, in this day 941 00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:42,880 and age, say the word she? The last time I did that gig, I 942 00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:44,000 think I only did it once or twice. 943 00:43:44,560 --> 00:43:47,040 Me and Paddy Migaki have been out of gig somewhere and he's 944 00:43:47,040 --> 00:43:48,800 like on the way home, I'll call in there. 945 00:43:48,960 --> 00:43:52,200 So I said I'll do it too. This is like 10 years ago and I 946 00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:54,640 did a spot and it wasn't going well. 947 00:43:54,880 --> 00:43:57,240 So I pretended my phone was on stage. 948 00:43:57,240 --> 00:44:01,120 I pretended my phone was ringing and I said I said I'll answer 949 00:44:01,120 --> 00:44:04,720 this for the crack here. And I said yeah, I said hello. 950 00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:09,080 And I said still doing what? Who? 951 00:44:11,200 --> 00:44:12,600 I said no, no, no, you're joking. 952 00:44:12,600 --> 00:44:15,640 You're joking. And then there was like laughs. 953 00:44:15,640 --> 00:44:20,000 And then they stopped and I said, Oh my God, Oh my God. 954 00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:24,520 And I just walked. And by the way, there's no like, 955 00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:26,800 MC coming up on stage to take over just yet. 956 00:44:27,240 --> 00:44:30,720 People thought maybe it's a bit. And I like, still half on the 957 00:44:30,720 --> 00:44:32,800 phone. I walked out of the front door, 958 00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:34,960 down the stairs. Where was this guy? 959 00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:40,640 It was in safe house just on beside John Hewitt. 960 00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:42,080 That is it. Yeah, I know. 961 00:44:42,520 --> 00:44:43,640 Yeah. So that's what I'm talking 962 00:44:43,680 --> 00:44:47,040 about. So I just walk out, go down the 963 00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:50,040 stairs, no one has started talking again yet upstairs. 964 00:44:50,720 --> 00:44:53,840 And as I got into my car, I looked up at the window and 965 00:44:53,840 --> 00:44:56,720 there's just like 2 comedians and a couple audience members 966 00:44:57,120 --> 00:44:59,080 just like real worried looking out. 967 00:44:59,080 --> 00:45:02,240 And I just went sorry, got my car and just drove from that's. 968 00:45:02,240 --> 00:45:04,240 The sort of gig where I'm surprised it didn't just go. 969 00:45:05,160 --> 00:45:06,920 Yeah, yeah. You know, like, like you're 970 00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:09,200 doing some sort of Andy Kaufman. Fuck yeah. 971 00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:12,440 Fantastic Revolutionary just walked out. 972 00:45:12,440 --> 00:45:13,840 Patty text me after. He's like me. 973 00:45:13,840 --> 00:45:15,520 What happened? I was like, no, I just wasn't 974 00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:16,920 enjoying this. Everything's fine. 975 00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:18,320 There should be a lot more of that. 976 00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:19,840 Yeah. You know, there's this sort of 977 00:45:19,840 --> 00:45:23,760 like the show must go on type. Me and Mickey headline pavilion 978 00:45:23,760 --> 00:45:26,920 ones doing sketches that we wrote that day and we got 979 00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:30,760 everybody on stage as part of this, like we're like get a clap 980 00:45:30,760 --> 00:45:33,160 going. We and I got everybody on stage, 981 00:45:33,160 --> 00:45:36,840 like the whole audience, 30 people on stage. 982 00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:39,040 Me and Mickey slowly walked to the back of the room, Clap, 983 00:45:39,360 --> 00:45:40,760 clap. We just walked down the 984 00:45:41,040 --> 00:45:43,800 downstairs and left. And as we walked out, we looked 985 00:45:43,800 --> 00:45:49,520 back and there's just like 30 people go and we just left and 986 00:45:49,520 --> 00:45:52,880 never heard anything about it. In the path, Yeah, man, the, the 987 00:45:52,880 --> 00:45:55,000 amount of times I've walked up the stairs, like I always had 988 00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:57,640 this bit of nostalgia, like, it'd be class to go back there. 989 00:45:57,680 --> 00:46:00,480 Yeah. And just like, you know, drop 990 00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:03,560 in. Yeah, drop in and twice we've 991 00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:06,200 went up the stairs and there's been absolutely no one there and 992 00:46:06,200 --> 00:46:07,400 we're just like, right, we're leaving. 993 00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:09,760 Yeah, because why would there be anyone there? 994 00:46:10,120 --> 00:46:15,400 Well, the last before COVID, it was usually like getting a good 995 00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:16,680 crowd if somebody would TripAdvisor. 996 00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:19,280 Apparently they were really good at advertising it for. 997 00:46:19,280 --> 00:46:21,360 Somebody search engine thing? Yep. 998 00:46:21,600 --> 00:46:22,880 So. Comedy. 999 00:46:22,880 --> 00:46:25,200 Belfast Entertainment. I enjoyed it the last. 1000 00:46:25,200 --> 00:46:28,000 Time I'd things to do. It was a middle-aged, some 1001 00:46:28,000 --> 00:46:29,960 middle-aged guy was going on after me. 1002 00:46:29,960 --> 00:46:32,960 So we're both standing near stage, and it was packed. 1003 00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:34,480 And I was like, trying to build a new material. 1004 00:46:34,760 --> 00:46:37,920 And the guy goes, so was it your first gig, too? 1005 00:46:38,240 --> 00:46:43,120 And I, as a joke, I went, yeah. And then I was like, I'll go on 1006 00:46:43,120 --> 00:46:46,880 stage, do my set, and then I'll wrap it up, share a laugh with 1007 00:46:46,880 --> 00:46:48,800 them. I go on stage, don't have a 1008 00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:51,040 great set. And as I walked off, I, like, 1009 00:46:51,040 --> 00:46:53,640 started chatting to him. He goes, you should do it again. 1010 00:46:55,520 --> 00:46:58,360 He's like, don't give up. You're not Graham Watson. 1011 00:46:58,360 --> 00:47:01,560 Stick at it, yeah. I just had a talk about that, 1012 00:47:02,440 --> 00:47:03,600 the things you've witnessed in there. 1013 00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:07,400 I remember going on stage and just being the mic broke, right, 1014 00:47:07,520 --> 00:47:08,880 Right. Deadly serious. 1015 00:47:09,200 --> 00:47:12,400 The mic broke. And I was like, I don't know 1016 00:47:12,400 --> 00:47:14,080 what they use. And there was like a like a 1017 00:47:14,080 --> 00:47:16,240 betting pencil or like an Argos pen or something. 1018 00:47:16,240 --> 00:47:19,040 And I just held it. And that became really funny. 1019 00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:21,040 And then I was talking to this girl because she was writing in 1020 00:47:21,040 --> 00:47:24,160 a notebook at a comedy gig. It's like, what are you writing 1021 00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:25,840 there? And she was just a poem and a no 1022 00:47:25,840 --> 00:47:29,520 joke. I was like I was like, what, you 1023 00:47:29,520 --> 00:47:32,360 got a you got a live stand up gig writing a poem, and I was 1024 00:47:32,360 --> 00:47:34,600 like, just at that point I didn't care what I was sort of 1025 00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:35,440 like, what are you writing about? 1026 00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:39,160 She was I wrote one about let no joke, lettuce, and I was like, 1027 00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:43,680 what is this fucking shit hole That's legit, which said but 1028 00:47:43,680 --> 00:47:44,680 you're not you know, you see they. 1029 00:47:44,720 --> 00:47:47,080 Were doing for sculptures. You see the clientele and yeah, 1030 00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:49,520 mind if I throw some play in the back? 1031 00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:55,600 I brought my own let. Me see, do you? 1032 00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:57,520 Remember the funeral party come up to the gig. 1033 00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:01,600 In path no. There was like there'd been a 1034 00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:04,240 funeral and the downstairs was like full of ones drinking 1035 00:48:04,240 --> 00:48:07,200 obviously, and I went down for a pest and this guy goes fucking 1036 00:48:07,240 --> 00:48:10,040 buy a blender. What's a crack at all my 1037 00:48:10,240 --> 00:48:12,400 something? My uncle's just fucking buried 1038 00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:14,040 there. And I was like, what are you 1039 00:48:14,040 --> 00:48:16,640 doing here? And I stupidly went doing a 1040 00:48:16,640 --> 00:48:19,520 stand up gig upstairs and he was are you fucking right now? 1041 00:48:19,840 --> 00:48:22,160 Shouts to like all the lads night. 1042 00:48:22,360 --> 00:48:28,400 I went upstairs, went on, came off and they all paid in and sat 1043 00:48:28,400 --> 00:48:30,640 down and someone was on stage and were like, this is fucking 1044 00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:32,560 shake and all the words buy a blender. 1045 00:48:32,680 --> 00:48:35,760 And I'd already been off and I was like, I've already been on. 1046 00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:37,640 They're like fuck's sake. And they all just got back up 1047 00:48:37,640 --> 00:48:40,560 and left again. This is worse than my uncle's 1048 00:48:40,560 --> 00:48:43,880 death. Fucking give me another family 1049 00:48:43,880 --> 00:48:47,000 death any day instead of watching this fucking I did. 1050 00:48:47,000 --> 00:48:49,400 A few deaths in the in the venue, to be fair, yeah. 1051 00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:53,640 It's got bad juju in it. I did my second gig there and 1052 00:48:53,640 --> 00:48:55,120 that convinced me to keep doing stuff. 1053 00:48:55,120 --> 00:48:57,880 My first was so bad. Then I had my second in there 1054 00:48:57,880 --> 00:48:59,240 and it was packed and it was fun. 1055 00:48:59,600 --> 00:49:01,480 So I like, I'll always enjoy that venue. 1056 00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:03,440 But yeah, there's nights obviously, because it's open mic 1057 00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:04,800 night. There's nights where you go and 1058 00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:07,400 there is literally nobody there. And then you remember they had a 1059 00:49:07,400 --> 00:49:12,840 comedian's table and it just became like there was more going 1060 00:49:12,840 --> 00:49:15,240 on there during the set than on stage. 1061 00:49:15,240 --> 00:49:16,440 There was like a lot of they were like. 1062 00:49:16,440 --> 00:49:18,920 Hackling. There was a weird hierarchy 1063 00:49:18,920 --> 00:49:21,440 thing where like, yeah, you knew who was able to sit at that 1064 00:49:21,440 --> 00:49:21,960 table. Yeah. 1065 00:49:22,200 --> 00:49:24,080 And then you'd come in and then it'd be like someone who'd done 1066 00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:26,000 1 gig was sitting there writing notes and you're like. 1067 00:49:26,360 --> 00:49:30,040 Who the fuck Yeah, but it got the point where they were they 1068 00:49:30,040 --> 00:49:32,040 were talking about the acts on stage. 1069 00:49:32,400 --> 00:49:37,000 I'm being so like animated about it and didn't care the a lot of 1070 00:49:37,000 --> 00:49:39,680 people stop going because that stop now like which. 1071 00:49:39,680 --> 00:49:41,800 Yeah, and you can just go back like fucking eight years later 1072 00:49:41,800 --> 00:49:43,720 and see people doing like the same set. 1073 00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:48,320 Yeah, you know, Yeah. And being like Mickey Bartlett's 1074 00:49:48,320 --> 00:49:54,000 shit. Here's my bit about my cat 1075 00:49:54,440 --> 00:49:56,280 something. I would, I mean at the minute I, 1076 00:49:56,280 --> 00:50:00,080 I, I do any gig I do, I do any gig nearly at the minute. 1077 00:50:00,360 --> 00:50:01,720 Yeah, that's where me and you differ. 1078 00:50:02,000 --> 00:50:05,080 Yeah, no, I just want to be on stage. 1079 00:50:06,440 --> 00:50:10,320 I just, every time I do it, I feel like if this goes away 1080 00:50:10,320 --> 00:50:13,400 again, which I don't think, well I hope it won't, I just want to 1081 00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:16,080 do as many as I can while I can, you know? 1082 00:50:16,840 --> 00:50:19,120 So makes sense. So anything paramilitary 1083 00:50:19,120 --> 00:50:20,640 fundraiser. I just feel like. 1084 00:50:20,720 --> 00:50:22,400 Anything. It has to be of a certain 1085 00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:23,800 quality or else it's not worth it. 1086 00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:28,600 Or maybe maybe if I get asked to do something don't like, maybe 1087 00:50:28,600 --> 00:50:31,040 I'm looking for something on the way home to do another gig to do 1088 00:50:31,040 --> 00:50:34,200 as well or something. But like, yeah, anything. 1089 00:50:34,720 --> 00:50:36,760 I actually really enjoyed that voodoo show. 1090 00:50:37,080 --> 00:50:39,280 Yeah. Just because his venue never 1091 00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:40,600 done, there's something I love about that. 1092 00:50:40,920 --> 00:50:44,400 I it's weird because the Thursday 1 was the most rowdy 1093 00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:47,880 and my material was the most shit, but it was the best gig. 1094 00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:50,720 And then Friday, which sold that immediately felt like I was 1095 00:50:50,720 --> 00:50:53,600 like, you guys, OK, right. Sunday was about the same. 1096 00:50:53,840 --> 00:50:56,240 They're still you guys. I said that to my sister. 1097 00:50:56,240 --> 00:50:58,280 She was like, I had the gigs go and I was explaining to her and 1098 00:50:58,280 --> 00:50:59,800 she was, well, that's something to do with Jupiter. 1099 00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:01,680 Jupiter's being weird at the minute and everyone's mood's 1100 00:51:01,680 --> 00:51:05,120 down and on. I was like, she smokes crack now 1101 00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:08,800 that's cool. But yeah, if there's venues I've 1102 00:51:08,800 --> 00:51:12,640 never done, I enjoy that. And then there was a Heckler at 1103 00:51:12,640 --> 00:51:16,400 the Thursday show, and I loved that because you can go back and 1104 00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:19,560 do stand up, but you need to be in those situations again to 1105 00:51:19,560 --> 00:51:21,560 feel like, oh, this is part and parcel of it. 1106 00:51:21,680 --> 00:51:23,120 Yeah. You know, the first I was so 1107 00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:24,520 nervous. We're getting heckled when stand 1108 00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:26,000 up came back in like September there. 1109 00:51:26,360 --> 00:51:28,880 And then it happened. And after it, I was like, oh, 1110 00:51:28,920 --> 00:51:32,440 no, I'm so glad that there's that exchange. 1111 00:51:32,720 --> 00:51:35,200 Even crowd work. I'm only now starting to be able 1112 00:51:35,200 --> 00:51:36,520 to want to do that again. You. 1113 00:51:36,760 --> 00:51:39,280 Know it took me a long time to like settle in the crowd work. 1114 00:51:39,280 --> 00:51:43,160 Yeah, like just just be like, you don't need to be have this 1115 00:51:43,160 --> 00:51:46,960 amazing comeback right away. Yeah, you can just sit there for 1116 00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:48,400 a minute. Yeah, because the guy at the 1117 00:51:48,400 --> 00:51:52,280 Voodoo show did all the work for me by saying Jewish instead of 1118 00:51:52,280 --> 00:51:55,800 Jewish, so that that worked. And then the audience kind of 1119 00:51:56,120 --> 00:52:00,600 because it was like we were cold at the start and then like I was 1120 00:52:01,360 --> 00:52:04,600 felt like I was working hard and then that happened and then that 1121 00:52:04,720 --> 00:52:07,960 felt like I broke the ice. The crowd working and I'm seeing 1122 00:52:07,960 --> 00:52:11,320 with those gigs in Ballycastle Hotel function room during the 1123 00:52:11,320 --> 00:52:16,200 day just felt a wee bit stuffy at the start and I went on just 1124 00:52:16,360 --> 00:52:18,680 doing material. It was grand. 1125 00:52:18,680 --> 00:52:21,240 First half, start of the second-half I'm just doing crowd 1126 00:52:21,240 --> 00:52:24,680 work, infinitely better. People just feel way, but that's 1127 00:52:24,680 --> 00:52:27,480 why. They see clips of people like 1128 00:52:27,520 --> 00:52:29,760 Paul Smith or something. They're like, do not love him. 1129 00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:31,520 Isn't he fucking hilarious? I don't know. 1130 00:52:31,600 --> 00:52:37,640 I've never seen Paul Smith do. That's whiskey do material. 1131 00:52:37,760 --> 00:52:39,840 I've never seen a bed of his at all, ever. 1132 00:52:40,440 --> 00:52:43,200 I think he does, but he can switch it up at any point 1133 00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:45,200 because he came to pugs for Dave. 1134 00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:48,680 He was doing Ulster Hall and we were in the Clayton Avon Coffee 1135 00:52:48,680 --> 00:52:50,320 beforehand. He was staying there so he was 1136 00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:53,360 about to foil anything and we're chatting to him and Dave said 1137 00:52:53,360 --> 00:52:56,640 look, I do pugs across the road and that was Dave, which is 1138 00:52:56,640 --> 00:53:01,040 weird. Dave's like come to a spot, 1139 00:53:01,040 --> 00:53:03,480 didn't think he would. Showed up that about half an 1140 00:53:03,480 --> 00:53:06,920 hour and he was doing material, then he got heckled and then 1141 00:53:06,920 --> 00:53:08,400 that became the show. Yeah. 1142 00:53:08,640 --> 00:53:11,960 And it was if you were sort of untrained, you'd probably go, 1143 00:53:11,960 --> 00:53:13,600 oh, that was all set up beforehand. 1144 00:53:13,840 --> 00:53:17,000 Yeah. Because it was it into one 1145 00:53:17,000 --> 00:53:19,800 person, heckled, Dealt with that for 5 minutes, someone else 1146 00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:21,280 heckled. Then he's bringing what this 1147 00:53:21,280 --> 00:53:24,720 person said into that and it just became a thing. 1148 00:53:24,920 --> 00:53:26,520 It's fucking great. Fantastic. 1149 00:53:26,840 --> 00:53:29,200 But the danger of committing the crowd work is then it just 1150 00:53:29,200 --> 00:53:31,640 doesn't. You've no like end to it or you 1151 00:53:31,640 --> 00:53:33,440 make people that much part of the show that you then. 1152 00:53:33,440 --> 00:53:35,640 It's nice if it falls between bits because there's nothing 1153 00:53:35,640 --> 00:53:37,480 worse than starting a story. And I mean, like, I was fucking 1154 00:53:37,560 --> 00:53:40,600 here and I anyway, I'm back in the shop here and you know, it's 1155 00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:42,280 like, or, or like, that'll be fun. 1156 00:53:42,480 --> 00:53:44,040 All you need to do is just give a wee look. 1157 00:53:44,840 --> 00:53:46,960 Oh yeah, I got it, you know. I can't even be Arsenal. 1158 00:53:47,600 --> 00:53:49,360 Yeah, you know, you're good at datum hackles. 1159 00:53:49,400 --> 00:53:53,560 I'm just like, what about? Yeah, it's OK, obviously until 1160 00:53:53,560 --> 00:53:57,360 it gets a point where it's like I've mugged you off 3 times, 1161 00:53:57,480 --> 00:53:59,160 Yeah, your mates are embarrassed. 1162 00:53:59,160 --> 00:54:00,320 Now you need. Just checked out. 1163 00:54:00,520 --> 00:54:03,400 Yeah, and not going to be me doing it, but hopefully an adult 1164 00:54:03,400 --> 00:54:09,760 man will come in and remove you. Leave big on me some gluten free 1165 00:54:09,760 --> 00:54:11,200 oats, Adam, No. Oh. 1166 00:54:13,960 --> 00:54:17,600 There was that a 2 questions. No, there's no, there's four 1167 00:54:17,600 --> 00:54:18,880 there. Remember the first Minister, 1 1168 00:54:19,120 --> 00:54:20,320 Joe Rogan? That'd be fun. 1169 00:54:21,960 --> 00:54:24,040 The other one was have you have me? 1170 00:54:24,040 --> 00:54:27,040 And you ever had a full argument, which I don't think we 1171 00:54:27,160 --> 00:54:33,000 have, You don't comedians and there's no one in our friendship 1172 00:54:33,000 --> 00:54:35,440 group that I've even nearly had an argument with. 1173 00:54:36,360 --> 00:54:39,280 It's a very laid by for such a high pressure job. 1174 00:54:39,920 --> 00:54:44,160 It's such a laid back. No, it can be quite bitchy, you 1175 00:54:44,160 --> 00:54:45,600 know what I mean? Like, yeah, there's probably a 1176 00:54:45,600 --> 00:54:47,360 lot of behind the scenes slobber. 1177 00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:49,600 There definitely is. But I don't think they will 1178 00:54:49,600 --> 00:54:51,760 arrive with each other, no. What are you gonna arrive about? 1179 00:54:51,840 --> 00:54:54,360 Yeah, no matter. It would have to be like someone 1180 00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:57,200 would like steal your bed or something, like blatantly steal 1181 00:54:57,200 --> 00:54:59,000 your bed. And I've seen it happen and I 1182 00:54:59,000 --> 00:55:02,160 don't even think people are fucking brave enough to confront 1183 00:55:02,160 --> 00:55:04,120 other people. They're just the heath even 1184 00:55:04,120 --> 00:55:04,840 bastard. No. 1185 00:55:04,840 --> 00:55:06,760 Yeah, but you wouldn't be. Sometimes. 1186 00:55:07,240 --> 00:55:10,480 But we'll see in London, you know, when you're like there's a 1187 00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:12,160 Nando's, it's only 7 miles away and. 1188 00:55:12,600 --> 00:55:13,920 I'm like, guys, what do you think of Nando's? 1189 00:55:13,920 --> 00:55:16,120 You're like, we went there for breakfast, lunch and breakfast, 1190 00:55:16,120 --> 00:55:18,560 lunch and dinner yesterday, so maybe we could try somewhere 1191 00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:20,560 else. And you're like, but do you want 1192 00:55:20,560 --> 00:55:24,560 to run that risk? I'm like, let's go somewhere a 1193 00:55:24,560 --> 00:55:27,000 bit different. tgi Friday's, we should try that. 1194 00:55:27,320 --> 00:55:29,440 Let's try and see what it's like. 1195 00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:31,840 Then you go in there and you're can I get the Perry Perry 1196 00:55:31,840 --> 00:55:32,600 chicken? Yeah. 1197 00:55:32,960 --> 00:55:35,320 I found a little mom and pop place called Shake Shack. 1198 00:55:35,320 --> 00:55:36,680 Would you guys like should we try? 1199 00:55:36,680 --> 00:55:38,320 You'll find some you know those chicken shops? 1200 00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:41,400 It's called like fucking mindies or something like it's nearly 1201 00:55:41,400 --> 00:55:43,040 this. It's like a RIP off Same sign. 1202 00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:48,680 Or Mandos try this. Fernandos chicken Perry Perry 1203 00:55:48,680 --> 00:55:53,800 chicken getting sued like fuck. Yeah, the show is on Saturday 1204 00:55:54,040 --> 00:55:57,520 21st of this month, which is like next week, and we'll put a 1205 00:55:57,520 --> 00:55:59,520 link to tickets in the thing. It's going to be nice. 1206 00:55:59,720 --> 00:56:03,160 Let me ask you this are you going to buy any clothing for 1207 00:56:03,160 --> 00:56:05,000 the show, either out there or before? 1208 00:56:05,360 --> 00:56:08,040 Yeah, probably. I mean, I've been fucking 1209 00:56:08,040 --> 00:56:10,560 looking around for trainers. That's weird. 1210 00:56:10,600 --> 00:56:13,480 It's not like you have. I've definitely been looking for 1211 00:56:13,480 --> 00:56:16,360 the traders that I nearly bought when I seen them advertised 1212 00:56:16,360 --> 00:56:17,320 first like a couple of months ago. 1213 00:56:17,320 --> 00:56:19,760 And then you go to look again, they're on like Farfetcher or 1214 00:56:19,840 --> 00:56:22,200 stock X and they're like £600 and you're like, I should have 1215 00:56:22,200 --> 00:56:25,840 bought them. So I would like this is what I 1216 00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:29,800 would like to do. I would like, I would like to 1217 00:56:29,800 --> 00:56:33,440 order a pair of shoes, maybe new jeans or something like that. 1218 00:56:33,880 --> 00:56:35,680 Have them ready. Yeah. 1219 00:56:36,200 --> 00:56:39,240 And then leave the window open for a new T-shirt slash short 1220 00:56:39,240 --> 00:56:40,440 sleeve shirt. Not there. 1221 00:56:40,440 --> 00:56:42,720 You're not burdening yourself with too much extra stuff to 1222 00:56:42,720 --> 00:56:44,720 take home. If push comes to shovel wear AT 1223 00:56:44,720 --> 00:56:48,280 shirt that I brought but I'm leaving but I'm leaving space 1224 00:56:48,280 --> 00:56:49,000 you. Shouldn't have to do that. 1225 00:56:49,000 --> 00:56:51,640 I'm leaving space in the bag for a top. 1226 00:56:51,680 --> 00:56:54,200 Or two. I mean, that's brief and 1227 00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:56,040 powerful and I like it. It's just this. 1228 00:56:56,240 --> 00:56:58,240 It's just smart. I might go the other way. 1229 00:56:58,320 --> 00:57:00,200 I might. I might leave the shoe option 1230 00:57:00,200 --> 00:57:02,400 right there, see what happens. I'll go. 1231 00:57:02,560 --> 00:57:04,680 The other way. I'll arrive there, put my pants, 1232 00:57:06,160 --> 00:57:08,360 try and collect it all. So you're going to just go 1233 00:57:08,720 --> 00:57:11,000 sandals? Yes over no pair. 1234 00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:13,960 Just don't just full pair. Get the barks on and. 1235 00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:15,360 Get over there, buy a pair of shoes. 1236 00:57:15,360 --> 00:57:16,480 Yeah, I'd like to get a pair. Of shoes. 1237 00:57:16,480 --> 00:57:19,040 No, I'll go fucking like if I go, if you take me to like a 1238 00:57:19,040 --> 00:57:21,440 food asylum or something, I'll be like, how much is it the 1239 00:57:21,440 --> 00:57:23,640 check to suitcases? On to this fucking. 1240 00:57:23,640 --> 00:57:26,480 You're like the wife of an oligarch, You know, he's like 1241 00:57:26,480 --> 00:57:28,920 doing the work. You're just like I need a lot. 1242 00:57:30,320 --> 00:57:34,360 And I just developed that I put it in put all shoes in bag 1243 00:57:34,360 --> 00:57:36,920 place. We need a bargain colony. 1244 00:57:37,000 --> 00:57:39,120 There's no room on play around my testes. 1245 00:57:40,400 --> 00:57:42,680 Yeah, I was in, yeah, going to one of those Westfield places 1246 00:57:42,680 --> 00:57:45,080 and there's like a food asylum and I'm just like, fucking get 1247 00:57:45,080 --> 00:57:46,680 it all in there. Tell it up. 1248 00:57:46,840 --> 00:57:48,080 Tell it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1249 00:57:48,720 --> 00:57:51,600 I'll go somewhere like that, travel really far to my way and 1250 00:57:51,600 --> 00:57:54,240 then go. Don't like anything you know? 1251 00:57:54,240 --> 00:57:55,960 No, I just fucking spray and pray. 1252 00:57:55,960 --> 00:57:58,800 I'm just like, we'll get it in the bag, we'll decide later. 1253 00:57:58,840 --> 00:58:00,960 Yeah, you got to go in there with something nice on or else 1254 00:58:00,960 --> 00:58:03,360 they don't take you seriously. We should buy outfits for each 1255 00:58:03,360 --> 00:58:06,160 other. Don't know what it is till 1256 00:58:06,160 --> 00:58:07,960 you're not allowed to look at it till you go on stage. 1257 00:58:08,800 --> 00:58:10,960 You just walk on stage looking like Vanilla Ice because I 1258 00:58:10,960 --> 00:58:13,760 dressed you. I have PVC see through blazer 1259 00:58:13,760 --> 00:58:19,720 and trousers. Deck all all steamy inside it 1260 00:58:19,720 --> 00:58:23,160 though. I'd be happy enough. 1261 00:58:23,160 --> 00:58:24,880 I like that. For you, for you to wear that. 1262 00:58:24,880 --> 00:58:26,680 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That'd be cool. 1263 00:58:26,720 --> 00:58:30,200 Just all sideways deck. I would put you out in like, do 1264 00:58:30,320 --> 00:58:32,960 you know what I think you would hate and be so uncomfortable in 1265 00:58:33,440 --> 00:58:36,520 just like a tourist hoodie. I think you'd fucking hate that, 1266 00:58:36,760 --> 00:58:39,800 you know, like, like a London with Buckingham Palace under it, 1267 00:58:41,320 --> 00:58:43,240 you know, fuck your. Heads, but I don't know because 1268 00:58:43,240 --> 00:58:45,400 you could you could you could get like if you got a nice 1269 00:58:45,400 --> 00:58:48,240 vintage washed out one, no brand new, OK. 1270 00:58:48,560 --> 00:58:51,280 It says 2021. Cheap, cheap print on it. 1271 00:58:51,280 --> 00:58:54,400 Yeah, we Beefeater guy on it. Really bad fit, like the 1272 00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:56,840 shoulders come out a wee bit too much and then go back in. 1273 00:58:57,080 --> 00:58:58,560 I'll buy you those. I'll buy you a pair of. 1274 00:58:58,560 --> 00:59:01,200 Those that doesn't happen when I work close, like the shoulder 1275 00:59:01,200 --> 00:59:04,760 never goes out to yeah, there's never space in the shoulders. 1276 00:59:05,240 --> 00:59:09,560 I'll buy you like, you know, 1 coloured jeans with no like fade 1277 00:59:09,560 --> 00:59:12,080 in them or anything. Like that solid a solid back 1278 00:59:12,160 --> 00:59:14,280 like a solid black Jean is a nightmare for. 1279 00:59:14,280 --> 00:59:17,040 Me and and indoor tights, indoor football shoes. 1280 00:59:18,000 --> 00:59:20,600 Oh wow, yeah. Boot cut jeans. 1281 00:59:20,720 --> 00:59:23,400 Yeah. Puma King Astro Turf trainers. 1282 00:59:25,320 --> 00:59:29,280 You couldn't do the game. You wouldn't even have to go 1283 00:59:29,280 --> 00:59:31,200 that far. Like the shape of my legs. 1284 00:59:31,320 --> 00:59:35,880 If you just bought me skinny jeans and like Chelsea boots, I 1285 00:59:35,880 --> 00:59:37,440 would just look like a shell and pony. 1286 00:59:37,960 --> 00:59:40,400 Snood up right? Doesn't take much to make me 1287 00:59:40,400 --> 00:59:44,520 look fucking stupid, like I would just give you a full FUBU. 1288 00:59:45,520 --> 00:59:50,000 Daishiki Jean shirt combo do rag yeah, I mean, let's do it. 1289 00:59:50,000 --> 00:59:54,720 That'll be a lot of fun yeah. We'll put the ticket thing in 1290 00:59:54,720 --> 00:59:58,560 the description and that you're only like, you know, like you 1291 00:59:58,560 --> 01:00:01,400 want to work peace or anything or anything you want to just. 1292 01:00:01,920 --> 01:00:04,560 Just like any sign off. Yeah, some shout out for. 1293 01:00:04,880 --> 01:00:07,160 Any causes or? Just, you know, like the 1294 01:00:07,160 --> 01:00:10,440 probably is going to be another lockdown, so why not just go to 1295 01:00:10,480 --> 01:00:13,400 all the gigs where there? Yeah, yeah, make him make hay 1296 01:00:13,400 --> 01:00:15,280 while the sun shines. Get a vaccine. 1297 01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:17,480 Drop the bags off. You got a vaccine? 1298 01:00:17,600 --> 01:00:18,800 Yeah. Two vaxes, Yeah. 1299 01:00:18,960 --> 01:00:21,840 Class, Yeah. I got 2 in each on them, you 1300 01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:23,520 know, just because you can never be sure. 1301 01:00:23,640 --> 01:00:25,360 Yeah, yeah, I know. I got them ages ago because I 1302 01:00:25,360 --> 01:00:28,160 have Crohn's. But yeah, no, no, I know you 1303 01:00:28,160 --> 01:00:31,200 didn't know that, but I've. I've Crohn's disease, so I got, 1304 01:00:31,200 --> 01:00:34,480 I got, I got the vaccines, 2017. You're in a fucking enigma. 1305 01:00:35,920 --> 01:00:37,360 Don't know, don't give out. You're like Kate Moss. 1306 01:00:37,360 --> 01:00:39,840 You say nothing, don't know anything about you. 1307 01:00:39,960 --> 01:00:41,800 Is Kate Moss known for saying nothing? 1308 01:00:42,120 --> 01:00:43,560 Yeah, she hasn't spoke her whole career. 1309 01:00:44,240 --> 01:00:45,800 What? Is that not true? 1310 01:00:45,800 --> 01:00:49,440 Coming on the podcast next week. She she, she does audiobooks for 1311 01:00:49,440 --> 01:00:52,480 camp. No, she she Yeah, she famously 1312 01:00:52,480 --> 01:00:55,360 just has not really said anything publicly ever. 1313 01:00:56,080 --> 01:00:57,720 Oh well, you'll probably find something. 1314 01:00:57,720 --> 01:01:00,120 But yeah, she just has like a horrific voice. 1315 01:01:00,880 --> 01:01:02,920 She sounds like my. She sounds like Milton Keyes, 1316 01:01:03,720 --> 01:01:07,800 fucking Kate Moss. You can't all of fucking gear, 1317 01:01:07,800 --> 01:01:09,120 mate. Take more picture, Mike. 1318 01:01:09,200 --> 01:01:11,800 Oh, yeah. Hey, what's on? 1319 01:01:11,800 --> 01:01:14,280 He takes. Shout out to Milton Keyes, all 1320 01:01:14,280 --> 01:01:15,520 right, just coming on. Appreciate. 1321 01:01:15,520 --> 01:01:16,920 Thanks very much. Go for food now. 1322 01:01:18,040 --> 01:01:20,640 Skinners in Hollywood. I I hate Hollywood shout out. 1323 01:01:20,800 --> 01:01:21,880 Everything you want in a bit of bread. 1324 01:01:21,880 --> 01:01:24,880 Fuck you. It's so tight. 1325 01:01:25,920 --> 01:01:27,240 Can't get through it. That's why we like it. 1326 01:01:27,240 --> 01:01:30,480 It's going to be pedestrianised. Really big. 1327 01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:33,440 Shouldn't say too much, I've heard it might just be 1328 01:01:33,440 --> 01:01:34,840 pedestrianised and that'd be pretty cool. 1329 01:01:36,640 --> 01:01:38,320 There you go. Because we all buy cars. 1330 01:01:38,840 --> 01:01:40,080 I don't have Nissan cash guy but. 1331 01:01:41,720 --> 01:01:44,960 I pulled the Jeep into that parking space there in coming 1332 01:01:45,000 --> 01:01:47,080 out and going back through the fence. 1333 01:01:47,080 --> 01:01:48,960 Just leave it and out forward through the fence. 1334 01:01:49,280 --> 01:01:50,560 Just leave it. Just getting on. 1335 01:01:51,080 --> 01:01:53,000 Getting on, we'll store equipment in it.