Separate welcome to this episode of the tea with me podcast with
me, she and Todd. Before we get into this episode,
let me tell you about a couple of things.
The first of which is tea with me live in the waterfront hall
are big shows this year. 29th 30th of November 30th sold out
29th some availability but some single seats floating about.
Check it out. Andrew Ryan, Dave Elliott,
William Thompson, Mickey Bartlett stand up on pod.
It's going to be a great time. This should be your Christmas
night out. Tickets are in the description
below Patreon. You know the crack by now from
as little 3 point a month. You get the bonus episode on a
Monday, live stream on a Friday, including Lazy Boy sometimes,
and we put some exclusive stuff on there like the Roast of
William Thompson, which will be out this week or next
exclusively on Patreon. People's legal teams have been
involved, but it's out there uncut for used to watch forget
in this episode. I also need to plug that I'm on
tour. Shame talk comedy.com down.
What date does this episode come out?
Potentially the 30th of October. 30th of October so I have I've
got Cork Opera House, Galway sold out, Dublin sold out, one
SSE sold out, but the 15th of November has tickets left, a
good amount of tickets left and then in turn Europe, Middle East
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What we'll have it for next week.
Unbelievable. Chairman.
Mr. Chairman, Chairman of the Board, my guests on this week's
episode are two returning guests, Nico Vander Horst, the
man mind Pride and Pinion, AKA the watch guy, who is just all
over the Internet for his his videos about watches and his big
personality. Nico's been in with this before
and this week he's joined by Dave Elliott.
We have a lot to talk about. This was a great 1A hell of a
lot of fun. Thanks these guys for coming
back on. Please join this episode of TF
Me Podcast with my guests Dave Elliott and Nico Vanderhorst.
Please look, let's just get straight into it, Dave.
Drop yours first for Nico. Show them what you're working
with. Oh.
Version 5 my friend. I can use one to be fair.
I'm not the fittest anymore mate, but.
Nico. Does it work for you?
Well, it makes me feel guilty. Yeah.
It makes me go out. My heart.
It's too high. I might die here.
Right? Which is a nice reminder.
And style wise, let me see it. Sleek, Sleek.
Thin. Sleek black.
Stylish. Now do you know what I don't
like is the look guys you'll wear like the whip or the Fitbit
on one arm and then the watch on the other.
You know. Too many things I.
Know I know what you're saying. You know what my real big
problem is with the whoop is like Stephen works for me,
right? It works pride and pinion.
He runs the company. I do fuck all, basically, but
every day he's like, ah, my sleep score is like 40.
And I was like, I don't give a fuck.
Yeah. I mean, it's this obsession for
scores. Yeah.
And I'm like that really. I I'm a very addictive
personality. How many hours a night do you
sleep? You in bed late?
Yeah, I will be in bed very late.
Like what time? I'm not a very good morning
person, but I will be in bed about two, yeah, two, 3:00.
That's why you're not good in the mornings.
That's that's late to go to bed. If I went to bed at 3:00 in the
morning, woke up, I'd be grouchy.
I'm not a morning guy. I go to bed at 2:00 and get up
at 4. I'm just not in a great mood,
don't want to wake up. I go to I You got to go to bed
before the Before the Devil comes out.
You'll be asleep before 11. Like that?
Devil Time. He comes out of 12 but like I
get asleep beforehand to make sure because.
The devil might have left his watch at home.
He might just going by feeling, yeah.
I hope would definitely be too confrontational for me, mate.
Yeah, your sleep score is 20. Yeah like and I have this thing.
I may just go out snacking and like middle of the night or
something. I just in bed for an hour.
You made that seem like it's like a sleepwalking thing.
You're like, I just go snacking, like you're not in control of
it. I I sleep order Uber Eats.
I sleep drive to Tesco. 24 hour. Yeah.
Nico, what do you think? This is?
A Casio illuminator, Water resistant, 50 metres.
Classmate, it's got there. Actually saw you wearing some
different watch with the reach, but when reach was there I don't
want to handle but some some some plastic.
No, it wasn't plastic. It was like like leather strap
gold colorish Oh. My friend was getting married
and then he he got the boys a nice nice fossil watch.
Yeah, I saw that's like, oh, he's, he's, he's making moves,
you know, he's making moves. Trying to be a real boy.
Yeah, man, that's. Better than the fossil was no
offence. This yeah, I just I like.
I just, you know, I just like Casio.
What do you, what do you wear in there?
Big shooter? That's not a Casio.
No, that's a sound blasted. We shot male.
That's actually. That sounds like a breed of dog.
Is your dog sound blasted? What kind of dog Hold on like
save as yourself sound blasted dog.
Yeah, that's that's that's sound blasted RM11 Philippa Massa.
So it's a collaboration that we shot Mill.
The brand is done with Felipe Mossa, the former F1.
Driver. I've been calling that Richard
Mele for years. Anytime I read that brand the
magazine. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But like the French are very and the Swiss and the French are
very anal about like we shot me, you know, it's like it needs to
be like a certain. Do you not get worried like
carrying out about? In order that issue fall, no,
no. In case of fall, yeah.
No, that, that would be a genuine worry for me, yeah.
You do like a bit like. You know banana skins slip.
I felt today before I came to the podcast, Yeah talk.
Stripped the word dustbin in the massage.
Lost the head. So passion cluttered.
Dave's not doing podcast. He's 1/2 of the Chuckle
Brothers. Tripped over a dustman.
No, I thought. I thought it was done for it.
See this age you go. Nicole, when you travel, have
you ever had like a hairy experience where you think
someone's trying to steal? Your watch.
Oh yeah, that the night in Bangkok.
What happened? Can we talk about that?
Yes, yeah. So I had a prototype of a watch
on the sort of proto that the actual.
We released the watch together with a very important watch
brand I had #1 the prototype were for clean Fortune, right?
Like like ball ballpark. $550,000 Like yes, fucking what
sort? Of dollars like which country?
Like proper, like math crazy you you'll love it.
It's an OR strap. The money love straps.
Yeah. Exactly but.
I don't know how you're just sitting with that.
I couldn't like put my hat if I'm carrying that much on my
wrist. If I had a 200 LB watch on, I'd
be so careful about where I was putting my hand down.
I'd just be so worried. What do you think can go wrong
with that? Nothing.
Well, if I go, if I go past 51 metres, everything, according to
the watch. No go past 51 metres.
But no, it was a it was someone tried to steal that watch
basically. And a friend of mine, Tommy,
Tommy Teeth, as I call him Tommy Turkey Teeth, is from Bella
Mona. I thought you meant Tommy Teeth,
like a thief. I was like, he's the guy.
He's like, this is what a thief would do if they.
Yeah, yeah. He went to some place here in
Belfast to get teeth but like the whitest I've never seen.
That's what. That's a mistake they all make.
Anyone who's getting taped on here don't have the whitest of
white. No, but they're like 2 levels
down white. Right.
Like whiter than white even. Like, it literally smiles and
it's like what? It's a bit wild.
Like so did he know someone he'd tip you off?
Oh no, no, he, he looks after me sometimes, right in.
What way that signs? Because if people try and rob
me, smiles at them and. In Bangkok they go get to it.
In Bangkok he saved me basically.
So he took the watch from the guy.
How did you know we got it off? Made I was absolute yeah I was
he just doesn't look out something he's amazing like but.
Were you in a restaurant or? Like no, it wasn't a club by I
never get like that ever. Oh, you've.
Had a one or two. With 150 grand watch on.
And the problem is, I think I was drugged that night, right?
Sleep drug, those guys do it. You're like, hey.
I think I was drugged that night.
That was proper, like the Hangover experience.
And the funny bit is we were doing a photo shoot with our
clothing brand at that night and it needed to be a bit of
hangover type of apes, right? But it.
Oh, you said you're a method actor.
You're like you had the IT. Was a while it wasn't wild or
what, That was ridiculous. Was it and when they get?
When they get I have to be. Careful, I want.
To know I don't know how I got back.
To that what were you drinking? What were you drinking?
Tequila, yes, yeah, yes. Straight, yeah.
But so tequila in in that part of the world or even in America
is like what whiskey is here. Like we only have shit tequila
and in here basically like the stinking rank bullshit, right?
Well, if you go to America. It's delicious.
Horrendously again. You then proceeded to do not a
Mexican song at all. You're doing we fiddly the
Irish. No, that's listen making bonds
mate. I'm not building walls, I'm
breaking them down. You're drinking tequila.
So tequila. So we have all sorts of whiskeys
here. They don't have that there.
They have just all sorts of tequila, right?
So yeah, that was some experience.
So does it taste like the get a shot of it or do you have like a
Tumblr? You ship it?
Yeah. How did the guy get?
Off your wrist was a sleight of hand.
I don't, I mean, I don't know very much about that night to be
honest. And like.
So was it like that that's fold it onto your wrist or is it like
through the week whole? I'm a strap.
I may have just oh, look at this.
I don't know. You know, see if you're in a
bar, I just let's come tequila in Bangkok and you go, this is
worth 150 grand. I guarantee there's going to be
a few girls going to have some of that, you know, some of that.
So it's your fault, really. And it's my fault and I know
when I take full. Response.
And what happened if Tommy Gate wasn't there?
If he hadn't got that back. I would have what happened?
To you you've. Been fucked.
How did Tommy get it back? I don't know, Tommy has his
means. And big shout out to you, Tommy.
That's a hairy situation because.
Listen, that situation I got myself in, but before that, like
in London, in London it'd be, it's very dangerous, I'm not
going to lie, right? I'm recognisable for a person in
my industry. So we're in AI do not wear a
watch in London, period. And I'm in London often for
business. So we usually have security and
I am very on the ball with how we take care of things etcetera.
So. But no, Northern Ireland never
had a problem. Never.
Have you ever pickpocket the day of robbed or?
Anything no no comes near me, I do it.
He's the thief. Yeah, our maid Stevie hit me
saying this. Got robbed by a one arm guy and
spin. Robbed a guy with one arm and
spin. So what was he?
How was he? He was.
Getting on a boss and a guy with one arm came up to him, like
part of his back and all. As he was getting on the boss,
you know, he's like, oh, like, have a good journey.
What? Did he rob him with in the hands
of his back? What's getting the?
As he was popping his back, he like he put his hand in his
pocket and also and took all his money.
What did he use to distract him? Yes, I'm curious about.
That. Yeah, Wave.
Something. No, I have no idea, but I think
I'm. Very restless with my feet like
so I can Peck like my toes I'm into.
Outbreak see by the end of this podcast, trying to take me goes
watch. For your food, like does this
guy have other body parts that he can use like a slip in?
Take his wallet and put it away. Yeah, I'd be.
So if I had an expense of anything on, I'd be so paranoid
about it. Yeah, I break everything.
Everything without me in terms clumsy.
Guy I wore a friend's Rolex for like a second as he was showing
me it and I was like I can't even sit with us on my wrist.
Why is that? Is that just the your mind or
was like you don't break a Rolex like you cannot break it to
period We'll. See, we're doing YouTube series.
Can we break that? He works.
Listen, do you want me to borrow you?
Well, no fully. Insured I I promise I would
appreciate it so much. I just couldn't.
I couldn't relax and work. I couldn't relax and work.
I told you this in the last time we I was here, right?
Comedians and watches make big thing.
They love it. They love it.
You were in Austin, right? And I want to hear everything
about that, by the way, because of like Victor Bollocks.
Every so they all had Rolexes yeah so that it seems like a bit
of a thing and it but the word amongst the age couple reasons
just complete personal preference If I was in an
audience watching someone really in everyday life and they're
wearing and I was like that watch is worth 2030 grand but.
People don't. Find it harder to relate and
also I'm very particular but like my doing my time properly
on stage. She was Dave Elliott, no more so
than this guy. He's the ombudsman.
If anyone was one minute over Dave, they're dead.
The Dave and I see that. 11 on pickpocket he used to be a
comedian, went over. Yeah, so I, I like to check my
time on stage and I'm used to Casios for that.
I probably have. Yeah, that's there for the gig
tonight. And that's the perfect one for
just checking my time. We stop watching it on stage.
So I, I don't know, just I like to be as relaxed as possible.
And I would be so conscious about how much that was worth
when I was on stage. It wouldn't help me relax.
See to like the normal guy and you go, what's a watch do tell
the time. Yeah, what do?
You mean to that first? Why?
When did you first go? I like watches.
This is what I'm into. It's not the watch itself that
tells the time, it's the whole idea and the concept behind it.
We had a we had a chat with Brian Cox about this right the
mod smart guy. Kevin, Damian.
Great Brian Cox. Talk to me.
I've talked it up my Nico. That's a lovely watch.
Fantastic. Does it tell the time?
Oh so. Sounds very creepy.
It's a. Little bit like.
Oh, take your watch off Nico. Oh.
And your pants, you know. Something.
Is it Gary Barlow trying to? No, that's Gary there.
Gary's somewhere a little bit more like that.
That's equally creepy. That's.
The lighter Brian Cox. So what is?
What's is Brian Cox Rock going to watch?
Yeah, yeah, actually it does. But having conversation for me
as a kid, right, I'll go back to the Bangkok spot.
For me as a kid, it's not the time or it's not the value or
it's not. It's the fact that we did, we
have to find time at some point, right?
This is time and this is how we measure it.
And we've done that in the past or very, very old past that we
we've been. Able to sundial.
Sundial some clocks of fucking. I know what I'm talking.
About exactly. Don't know how to work or.
What? But we've then defined that day,
the sun, the sun and night. We've we've separated that.
Then we've separated the, the daytime, we've separated the
evening and the night time. So for me, the fact that we
have, we as human beings created the device that tracks that and
we have to find that that was always the fascinating part.
Mate, I am full blown ADHD, right?
I cannot concentrate on nothing, right?
It is what it is. As a kid, all I wanted to do was
either play Lego or take a watch apart, put it back together.
Like I enjoyed that, that element and that is for me
something that that's why it started for me as a kid.
I never thought that I would make a career out of this Mate.
I come from fuck all. I don't never had a money, a
penny in my pocket. You see what I mean?
And it's still not today the financial side that interests
me. That's why we have people around
us that do actually care about that.
Because with my fucking lavish fucking idiotic spending,
sometimes we need people that we need more commercial than me, to
be honest. But like for me it is the the
fact that we track the track time and the fact that it lasts
a lifetime. To give you an idea, if you buy
a Rolex up banner for 9/9 and a half 10 grand or maybe even you
get handed down a watch like that mate, that's will survive
yourself. And like, I bought a watch
whenever my son was born and I will wear that watch 17 times,
meaning that on every single one of his birthdays I will wear
that watch. And when he's 18, he gets that
watch. If he sells it, I'll fucking
kill. Like I'll fucking kill.
Him. Oh, my dad handed me anything
cool like a watch, whatever. I would send you a hand you
Jesus is like Lord knows what that man.
I am. His kneecap, probably he has
that somewhere. Brian Cox, by the way, just
Brian. We had this conversation.
We as human beings still don't know what time is.
We've, it's just like we don't know.
We've just mentioned, we just decided that and we've decided
to create a device to track that.
So we still don't know. There's still no proof that.
Are you saying there could be even another R that we?
Yeah, exactly. You never know.
It's. 20 past 13, you know what I mean?
Maybe there's 25 hours in a day we don't know if we find.
Out anything. Could be anything.
Yeah. Approach it without.
John Day, I'm. Actually skinny.
But I see what you mean about like, so those comedians in
Austin, like at the mothership, all those comics, they all
Rolexes. But I understand like they saw
that as they've worked to a certain level, they've got these
gigs. So they are are treating
themselves to that. But it's just it's just that
they. All know The thing is right,
Americans are way, way too much of your face like people from
here, just like like this is where you see that in many
aspects. I see that on YouTube, right.
I would never put a customer on camera.
Never. But in America.
Oh, that's all. Oh look at me showing off my 2
underground bargaining. For a Rolex and you said though
a lot of a lot of. Them shut up too, but comedians
it would probably be the Americans are way more open.
We're way more like I we don't have much I'm I'm poor like
otherwise the fucking tax man calls whatever.
You never know, like, but we're way more, I would say humble
about that. Yeah.
We don't care about that too much, I think, yeah.
What's your most any lavish purchases recently that you've
got told off for by like other people around you?
Yeah, every everything I do gets old off for me.
Give me example like say when you're travelling, when you're
going to Bangkok, Yeah. Are you like, are you cleaning
up with the duty free or anything?
No, no, no. No, no, or anything like that.
No, I'm trying to lose weight. You know, it's very hard, but
no, I'm I'm under, I'm thinking at the moment and I haven't even
told anyone this yet, but I'm thinking about a specific car,
which would be a brilliant idea, but I promised not to buy
another car. So I'm we've been in conflict
here at the moment. So you get a notion and you'll
go for it. I'm really impulsive, yes.
What was the stupid purchase you've made looking back on?
I ordered some naughty stuff during COVID.
Jet skis were actually great. Well, because in the end I made
money on them. Right.
That was good, but everyone was like, you're a lunatic.
And I'm like, yeah. I got an omelette maker on
Amazon but £25 tiny. Yep, you don't the.
Almond. You just need to look in the
roommate. You're an almond maker.
Just put on a path, fold it over.
I can try that. For this week I bought 3 packets
of grapes, Marks and Spencer's. I thought you only need 2.
Yeah, but in M and S3 M&S punnets, yeah.
That is fucking mad expensive, by the way, but it's delicious.
Mixed seedless. It's grape is a grape isn't?
It not, no, that's not just any grapes.
These are. Mad expensive.
That's a 2. That's one thing we have in
common. Well, me and Dave go lavish.
We'll buy like a wee, a wee jacket or a shirt and Marks and.
Spencer I mean, that's lavish. That's as lavish as I go.
Jackets and fruit from Marks and Spencers.
That's me going. You've done well.
There's a real fruit problem. I do but.
I buy Pershing Pigs on tour. I've talked about that's my new
addiction. I go on tour.
I'm going away this weekend and I bought some Pershing pigs for
the car. Have you?
Tried reverse E pigs, they fuck your mind.
You're talking about time space continuum.
Now there's so many options with fucking Persy pigs.
Mean revert. There's Vegan Persy.
Pigs. Like what the fuck is that
about? They're actually quite nice
because the different sort of chew, but reverse E pigs are,
you know, we pink bit and as we ears are like the red bits, the
face of red eyes are pink. This is how I my persy pig.
Everyone has their own way and there's no right answer.
If you just go. I just stack 4 but I do a stack
4 on top of them and just. That's how I do it.
See, that is love. That's impulse and lavishness,
right? What you want to do is get the
two years, push your finger into the middle of the face, folded
the ears over, then fold again so it's a twice folded Percy
pig, perfect for one bite. Done you.
Call that we pork burrito a. Burrito.
Yeah, I would. Did you do the nickel?
Did you do the Gumball 300? 3000, yeah.
Oh what? I'm not saying them up to, I'm
saying for the 300, not as much. You try.
You drive in Belfast to Bangor in your own car.
Matters experience with my life. I'll never forget that.
So that used to be on. Would that have been like
Channel 4 back in the? Day I has been I Ed was.
What's the concept of this whole thing?
Jackass made a movie about it, and was it 2012 or 13, right?
And that's how I got introduced to that, right?
Did you love Jackass back in the day?
Yeah. It was the best thing I.
Was like not obsessed that Midget one.
I felt like connected to it. We know.
I felt like that's. The wee person doesn't.
I mean, I'm a wee person. Like I'm a wee bit fat, but I
mean I'm also wee bit short like but like.
We mom was your guy. We was my guy, like.
Who's your favourite Jackass? Ryan Don?
Was Ryan Don the guy with dance Nick?
No, I know he's dead. Oh, I know he's dead.
Party boy, it's disrespectful. Party boy, don't snake right on
itself. Respect.
Right. His face, yeah, he had self
respect when he was doing all those respectful stunts.
Yeah, he ran OK randoms, my favourite.
Yeah. Yeah, or IP.
Like let me, I'll give him his Jews.
But yeah, I like them as well. I give him his dues.
But I liked all those shows. So sorry that put the idea in
your mind. Yeah, and the gumball was in
Belfast in 2016. Yeah, it's.
Gumball a brand? Is it a?
Yeah. What is it?
It's a brand. It's like, it's like the most
famous rally. So, you know, the Cannonball
movie? No, no, no.
Carol song by Damien Rice. Do you know what?
No. Can I sing a bit of it?
Yeah, go ahead. Stones taught me to fly.
Can you go higher, like high pitch?
Yeah. Like blonde high.
Love taught me to lie. Come on courage, teach me to be
shy because it's not hard for try and actually chew myself up
a bit and I don't want to lose. It's not hard for and you know
that. Sorry, sorry sorry yeah of his
fucking comedian shit. Just do you.
Think that was you know what they're.
Actually. Actually good like that that
was. Actually good.
Felt good. I like applause.
Come on. I take the piss out of you. 10
people in this room, one person of that.
Come on, you know I I take that's the best you've ever
signed. Are you serious?
Thanks. No.
Best I've ever signed. Your stag.
Lisbon Mustang Sally in that bar where the people didn't want us
to be singing. The family bar that they wanted
us out. Yeah, but I don't remember that.
I do have a video of us all singing.
Caravan loved by the house Martins.
No, it might have been goodbye, my lover.
Maybe, maybe, I don't know. Just.
From Illuminati I. Remember.
Yeah, was. That was the James Morrison.
Sorry, so the movie Cannibal. So it's a it's, it's a rally.
The concept is a rally, right? And we can't say it's a race,
but maybe it is, maybe, who knows, right.
And it is the modest, craziest rally.
It's very, very exclusive, right?
For me, like with my background, genuinely I never thought it
would be possible, but I had. To be invited to be part of it.
Yeah, right. Right.
And it cost a clean fortune, right?
To to take part. I have no idea of the inner
workings of it, I've just seen the mad cars and all that kind
of thing, but. It is the modest, craziest, best
thing I've ever done in my life. It has changed me and changed my
life that week. Yeah, it is.
Genuinely. It is done.
So where did you you're going from?
Where to where? So we our start was in Vietnam
in a place called Ho Chi Minh City and the finish was in
Singapore and we went through come Vietnam, Cambodia,
Thailand, Malaysia and the Finnish was in Singapore.
And genuinely, I have never experienced anything like it.
And is it that you do some driving during the day and then
is it like party every night? Yes, yes, But it's not a wee bit
of driving. It's like proper driving, right?
That's brought 8900 kilometres bomb.
Holy shit. Oh yeah.
Who's part of your like team? Who?
Who do you? Got you in the car.
What Car you drive? I was driving.
I have a black Ferrari GTS which is a heap of shit.
It broke down three times on the rally.
Don't know, I would. If you want rid of it, I'll.
Take I no problem. No problem, no problem I.
It was a car that I. How'd you get a load there?
A boat you put on a boat. On the boat, it's mine.
Downline is more the. Vietnam.
No, it's what was the boat again?
In some wild name or something. So that's all organised by a
company called Cars, so see what they do.
All right, surely boats would have been better but would be
more appropriate. So CCRS here in Northern
Ireland, Steven Legend dropped it off in London, right?
London car goes on transport. You can either choose aeroplane
airfreight, which is really expensive right, or a boat,
which is still expensive but not as expensive.
They they can put a car on a plane.
Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's wild as well.
One of the cars that we have here is flying over to America
in the next couple of weeks. This.
Yeah. But that's.
You know what, let me tell you one thing, right.
And people are looking like just saying, how much do you think it
cost to love this? Yeah.
How much do you think it cost to rent a car in America?
Like a cool car for two weeks? Why don't we?
I got a Mustang for my honeymoon.
How much did you pay? Probably $600.00.
I'm like almost. In total might have been less,
yeah. But like I mean, say you want
about want to do you want? This to be higher?
Yeah. Yeah.
My answer? Yeah, $3000.
Higher. 20 grand. Yeah, 20 grand.
All right, fair. Enough.
Anyway, my point is not proven. Can I can we guess how much it
would cost to get a car from Belfast to Vietnam?
Yeah, Vietnam was expensive, relatively expensive.
But America is not that expensive.
To get a car from I'm. Just trying to see if I know
anybody. No, I'm not asking you to
facilitate that. You're the last guy with us.
Yeah. Cars.com.
I'm going to say, I'm going to say 15 grand.
You got to get a car, Vietnam. I'd say more now I'm going to go
25. Is that one way return?
Depend on what it is. Return Yeah.
Actually eighteen 19,700 points. I'd be like, I'll just keep it
here. Oh yeah, that's sweet.
I need a car there. But I get one when I'm right
there. Yeah.
And those boys love bikes. Talk, talk.
Talk to we've we've been we tried to hire a talk talk
actually apparently they don't. What was the crack?
Where the way can we get a talk Talk.
You didn't have the move yet now.
Oh, so we've just started. Being in Vietnam, talk talks,
yeah. Where were talk talks from then?
Thailand or something? India, I'd say.
They started in India, I would say.
There's some Can we we? All on in London, we're still
drunk, yeah. Thailand too, because there's a
very enjoyable Thai restaurant that I like in Bangor and the
new nards called Talk Talk Delicious and they are basically
based in Thailand, so Talk Talks aren't Thai.
Those guys have some questions. Japan.
Japan, You know what, to be fair, those guys, they're the
first, did everything. They're legends.
Yeah, Japanese. Yeah.
I like, are Japanese big into the watches?
Oh, they love it. Yeah, because those vintage
watches love their whiskey. They're the whiskey #1.
They like the finer things of life.
I just wanted to make a really bad comment.
I'm not doing it. OK, Thank God.
So, so talk. So you start in Vietnam.
Yeah. And then it's serious driving.
But who else is taking part in this?
Like, did you know anybody else taking part?
Like people like Andre Agassi or one.
Person from Northern Ireland that was on one team from other
team from Northern Ireland, Hugo Duncan.
No, No. Say Michael Dean would be my
guess. I could see him.
Can't tell you who it is, was not Michael Dean.
Well, they're hardly keeping a low profile taking part in a
Gumball 3000. Why can't?
Why can't you say who don't say that wanna be.
My place. Are they famous from, you know,
prime? No.
No, no. Maybe.
I love that they're like. We think it happened.
For like we're driving a McLaren F1 for the Gumball 3000, but I'm
just keep my head down. Don't people know I'm doing
this? Yeah.
What? What industry are they in?
Can't tell you. Tell us the industry or a
second. Well could you Google Gumball
Northern Irish Rally 20/20/14? Have a look.
But like there's I wasn't. So there was one other team from
Northern Ireland, right. So there's teams, 120 teams,
basically the enemy. And who's in that team?
I can't tell you. All I can say is like, it's not
a race, but I beat them. OK, so basically I was number
one from Northern Ireland. Right.
And there's two of you. It's still #1 like everybody
always say, I want something now.
I didn't, but it is the modest experience. 120 teams, yeah, 100
met. Like in, in like convoy, Yeah.
Yeah, like not just convoy that. So we had a police convoy where
basically there's no rules. So Cambodia, no rules.
Cambodia is an incredible, incredibly beautiful country, by
the way. What was the best night out the
whole time? The only one I would have said,
I can't remember much from Bangkok.
That's my problem, right? But I didn't go home basically,
right. We, we were on this mad island
on the coast of Krabi in Thailand.
But the first night I couldn't join because it's monsoon
season, right? So the boats made it was you
couldn't, it was too dangerous, right?
So this Russian oligarch, and it's the only thing I can say
about it, rented out an entire hotel, just like 5 star hotel
rented the whole. Fucking we're not talking an
Ibis right? No, no, no, no.
So this entire hotel, so he saw the new.
These guys are experienced, right?
These guys do these rallies. It's called Team on the Run,
right? We.
Feel those boys from here too. They're funny, right?
But they're very, very, very like, very, super amazing, like
night, really incredible people, right?
Just to clarify that, and he's apparently right, whenever we
realised I was getting close to Krabi, the last couple last two
hours and I saw in the group chat and I saw in the news that
we couldn't. The boat was going to be
suspended and we were one of the late last ones.
We were in trouble we couldn't get across meaning so we
couldn't make it to the finish. This guy already figured this
shit out hours ago and rented out this entire like mod resort,
5 star resort. The entire resort was rented out
and I was like right, I need a bed because I mean like
whatever. Basically they invited us.
That team had several cars on. One of the cars was just full
with champagne. Like I have photos of this.
One of the cars was just dedicated on champagne, right?
So yeah, we're stranded. Mate.
We were there with 6070 bottles of fucking don't bury on me like
the wildest thing I've ever seen.
And it's breakfast included. Mate, it is.
Like I would love it if he's like there's. 12 I charge.
What I'm telling you here is movie shit, but I'm living that
there and it like I just like. So everybody gets on with
everyone basically. It's like if you're doing the
rally. You have this connect because
people think gumbo is a luxury holiday, but let me tell you,
it's not right. It is actually the opposite.
Car for the Can I just say you've just told us a story
about a guy who bought. After 12 hour drive.
And feel like, feel like it's all.
I think this is fun. After 12 hour drive, right?
People enter rail and sleeping on a sleeper train going through
Slovakia at the minute. Wait 8 strangers traffic?
Yeah. But it is like it is a mad
endurance thing as well. When you drive, drive 11-12
hours and let me tell you a sports car or supercar or
hypercar, they're not very comfortable, but that's the
same. Oh man, I sound like a Dick.
Oh, you need. You need because we wooden balls
in the seats you know you sit. On I know, I know.
I tried to get drivers. I tried to get some of those
when I got my first car. And I stop you getting sweaty.
One layer Corsa the the like a Turkish taxi drive like holiday
taxi driver beaded seat cover. They are on me.
They are the shit. I love those.
But like, it's not a lot. Let me it is intense.
No sleep. You have a wee party now and
then, right? How do you keep yourself awake?
Not being made. I have never touched that shit
in my life. I just meant it like that I.
Just clarified that I have never touched that shit in my life
Right, another shit, but not now.
But it's it is wild. Whenever you're driving through
months monsoon, the weather is mad crazy.
You need to be careful with the roads.
You need to be. You're not in a convoy because
you with this weather. We weren't in a convoy.
Who's in your car? I had a friend of mine in the
car. So 2 of yous and you're taking
turns. I am a very bad passenger so I
just, I'd done it myself. I let him drive for 100
kilometres and I was like this is more fucking tiring than me
driving. Not gumball, but I drove me and
William Thompson around Scotland for a couple of regional tour
dates and didn't let him touch the aux cord at any point,
including including on his birthday.
That is. That is rude.
Think so? Yeah, I think so.
But I'm driving, I like my music and I'll cater for everybody in
the car. I'm not just going to play
specifically what I like, you know?
Can we tell a story? It was 10 out of 10 in the car.
You go with the gig and you're your son had access to the Alexa
and he was picking songs for coming at your radio.
Over all the songs, you're like, oh, this is not me.
He was at home connected you Dell.
He was at home, so my phone all of a sudden went on to playing
songs. We're also playing at the Alexa
at home. I mean be able to drive.
Yeah, but I don't know what the song was, but it kept coming
back on. So you're like, oh, that's not
me. And then the next one was the
same song. It was something really nice,
like Katy Perry roar or something, and you're gone.
My son grows up maybe like. Taylor Swift like blank spaces.
He'll be like, oh, you're doing me dirty here.
It's not. My son doesn't.
He's at home with the wee eye of the tiger.
I think it might have been what is he into?
I think it might have been like stick season by no account or
something like that. Oh yeah, I like country music
and. Stuff I like stick season.
What is a stick season? It's a nice song, but I don't
get what that is. What a stick season?
Like, no one's had a stick season before.
No one's been. Oh fuck shirt sticks.
It's autumn. They were sick of me for them
putting it off for like half a day or something.
But when you're driving 11-12 hours a day, what's you have You
got a playlist going? Yeah, heart style usually.
For 11 or 12 hours, Sorry. What was that shit?
Dirty hurry no fuck me heart style mate.
Fuck. Genuine.
Question you want to listen I. Don't like that I very very easy
style if you got invited to go. Genuine question, would you do
Gumball 3000? Yeah, of course it would.
I wouldn't. No, I'd be it.
Sounds like way too much. But you know what I would do?
I'd be like you, far away and I just sleep, possibly going
along. I'm telling you one thing,
right? It's not cheap.
Like I said, it's very difficult.
But hold on, sorry, but you're talking to guy buys.
I can be, I can, I can be open about that, but I want to.
How many M&S groups? Be very clear about, like, for
me, this is a childhood dream coming true.
I never thought I would ever be in a position like that.
I would never thought that I would be able to afford a car of
that magnitude. And next to that for me, there's
a big business transaction as well, right?
If I was in a different position, I, I could never have
done that, right? If I didn't have the business or
the business reasoning behind it, I couldn't have done that,
right? The entry fee is $100,000,
right? For a week, the total week would
cost you an average of $150,000. That's.
Diesel as well. That's diesel as well and
insurance and transport. It is mad expensive, right, But
it actually, for our business has done wonders.
The network you get in because you go through the same
experience. You are now in that network.
Yeah. Yeah.
And whenever you don't want to do business, whenever you get
that business as a gumball or because you have this bond we've
done, we shared this together. You see what I mean?
Yeah. Give you an idea, right?
Patricia France coming here on Monday, right?
He was, he was, he was with me on the gumball, right?
He wasn't with me. He wasn't the gumball.
I know Patrice Evra for two years prior to that, but we
didn't have like we met each other going out one or two
evenings of of of drinks, whatever, right?
But that week we actually got very close.
Now he's helping me with something here back home, right.
So that network is so important that $100,000 may we've we've
sold several watches to people on the gumball.
I'll have that. I'll have that earned back in
2-3 months. That's not the point, right?
And that was also not the main motivation.
That isn't definitely not the main motivation, but it allowed
me to justify me doing that. And you know what?
From when I was a kid, right, or when I was a teenager from from
the time of Jackass to everything I've seen everything,
I followed it every year. I've been quite close to it and
I never got the invite and to getting the invite this year and
the most important one, which is the 25th anniversary to being in
2016 here when they were going when they were in the Titanic
quarters, to being on the start line in Vietnam and my car
fucking didn't want to start. It was a mad experience to the
finish line where my car broke down about 5 metres away from
the finish line it was. Oh so did you have to do the
cool runnings and just push? Yeah, I so clap.
Breaks it. It was wild.
He actually, Gareth actually jumped out of the car to film
that and he fucking someone drove over his foot.
It was the wow made the madness. I can you wouldn't believe it.
It doesn't make any sense if I tell you, you wouldn't believe
it, but it is. It has changed me, my life and
an outlook on many things and my and of course the network that
comes on the back of that. Can you just do like a chill
day? Genuine question.
Like would you find it difficult to go to a coffee shop, have a
coffee, maybe go for a walk? Like would you find it difficult
to just have like a day of complete like relaxation and
switch off? Yeah, I find it very difficult.
I find it extremely difficult and I'm trying to deal with
that. I'm actually, funnily enough,
I'll be very open about this. I'll try to, I've tried to find
help because I'm a father of two kids, mate.
Like I miss my kids so much when I'm away, but I'm constantly
trying to figure out a way where I don't, I can switch off when
I'm with the kids, right? Back in the day, it wasn't a
problem because that didn't really interfere.
It didn't really affect me too much.
But with two kids, mate, that that should affection, you know,
And for me, really, I'm trying to figure out that balance.
But I've lived an incredible and I'm living an incredible life,
right, dream above dream. Like I said back in the day, May
I lived in Bainbridge. I couldn't afford my rent.
I had a girlfriend that paid my fucking rent, right And that I
swear to God, right to where am I mate?
I am just so incredibly grateful.
I will never fucking complain, but finding that balance is just
nearly for me, nearly impossible, like I'm on a
journey to discover how to fix that.
You see and how to like. I don't know.
It hasn't hasn't got anything to do with ADHDI don't know, hasn't
got to do anything. But I am just every time in that
rush. But what I would really like and
is, is having a moment like that, right.
And and you know what I always said if I I was just after the
gumbo, because I was made the gumbo, like I said, it was the
best experience of my life. I took a week off after the
gumbo and spent a flu. The family offered to Dubai and
we had some time with the family.
I couldn't relax. I was able to catch up with
sleep, but I couldn't mentally relax.
And that really, really worries me.
And I really need to figure out and I need to figure that stuff
out very. Soon, that's a balance for
obviously when you're doing as much trouble as you do, but
anyone who's like self-employed or or anything like like when
you are your business, it's so difficult.
Like when we travel for shows, like when I was talking about
being in Scotland for like two or three days, it's it's so
difficult and I'm and I'm an hour away.
You know, I tell you what, if you're we all, we all have two
kids. If you're ever like travelling
and missing home, if if ever Luke Combs front door famous
comes on shuffle on a Spotify playlist, skip on fuck me, that
song will end you. It's created, but that balance
is it. Back into there, I thought it
was Elvis Presley with my boy and then I realised he didn't
have some fucking liar. And I you know what?
You know what the craziest thing on the way here, I promise you,
I put on a Spotify playlist of Elvis on the way to the studio
today. And this morning was the first
time I ever heard that song. Yeah, my mentals that doesn't
even a well known song, but the song because I thought when I
listened to it, I went there's going to be emotional song, but
a father and son, it's him being like, listen me and your mare
done. Yeah, exactly.
Fuck yourself. He never had a song.
So that's a lie. And I feel like I've been lied
to for the majority of my life. Yeah.
Like that was does heartbreak break breaking like.
Me and they were me and they were emotional guys.
We still like to go after yeah. I like to cry.
It's good to cry. I do, I do, I do.
There's no integration for better help here.
Like, I mean, it's just landscape, this thing.
That makes that helps your mental health but as well.
We shave. Yeah, maybe, but Harry done
that. We bit groggy.
We shave. You said that people have
genuine mental health problems a lot more 5.2 it maybe without
wireless charging technology. Maybe maybe what it needs.
Definitely no. That's good to hear you saying
that you. That you were aware of it.
Yeah, you know what I mean. And you want to try to do
something about it. Yeah, because I don't want to
be. I don't want to.
I don't want to be disconnected from my children mate.
I have everything I do today. As soon as I became a father and
for you to say maybe the same. The first 7-8 months I didn't
feel like this is normal, right? What the hell is going on all of
a sudden? Like I need to love this unknown
person that all of a sudden joined my life.
This is my child, right? And I felt like really weird
because I was like, I couldn't really fully like because it was
it was wild. I can't describe this right.
Today it's completely different. He's turning 2 in a couple two
weeks 3. I fucking miss my kids.
I love my kids, but I had it took me a good couple of months
to grow in or good maybe even a year to grow into that.
And that actually made me think think, is it me?
Am IA problem? Do I have some emotional
disconnect? Am I just what is going on here?
You see what I mean? And that was quite difficult, to
be honest, but I've got over that.
But everything I do today is for the next generation.
And I'm not even joking. That's in my car actually as
well. My son's name is in the car for
the next generation. I never thought that I would be
able to afford a expensive car, mate, that wouldn't even be in
the in the wish list, right? Yeah.
But was that's how far away it was.
So I wanted to be very clear for myself and like I'm trying to
create memories with that exact car with my son on because I
would love to have if I was him and I would be 37, like I am
lie. I would have loved to have
memories like that from my father.
Unfortunately, I don't and I'm like, I want to create that for
him. That's why I chose that car And
that's what long story. I'm not going to go mad deep
into that, but I I changed as a as a person with kids do that.
Oh, and in. Your defence though, whenever
the kids are, they're a bit Wick when they're just born, I mean,
they don't talk, they'll do anything.
You're kind of what are you going to do any way till they
talk about and then you're like, they're great.
I need to love it but it's keeping me fucking awake.
What the hell is this? And why are you so small, making
so much noise? That's impressive.
Just wise up mate. Like yeah, it is, it is.
Listen, but but that is balancing.
I have worked seven days a week for nine years straight, right,
given everything, right, same as yourself, right, very difficult
fucking being on stage and like hoping that people like what
you're doing and then trying to hustle, trying to work and work
harder and then doing a big, big breakthrough.
And then in Austin, like that is fucking classmate.
Like I had. I have my own journey and but I
also have a family, right. So these are two different,
different perspectives. And This is why what we talked
about earlier just before the podcast.
That's why it affects me so much if something like that ends up
in the news because it's home. I don't care if it's if it's if
it's an America or in any other when stuff happens at home, This
is my house. I'm bringing my kids to nursery.
There's people that see me. You see, people know who I am
and that's why I want to keep that stuff away from from home.
Angus good that like the says like that you, you, you
recognise like you need to switch off and all that kind of
thing because it's because you feel like if you're, if you're
relaxed, you feel like you're not providing or you feel like
you're not on it or you're. But then, and I support like
having stuff to pass on is obviously like we, we all want
to do that. But I I think like when you're
passing on like you're giving, passing on your time like,
there's nothing better than like.
That that is the thing and I think as well, like whenever you
I, I find what helps me is again, because I'm only recently
a full time comedian. So I was like, I need to be
working all the time and I was losing a bit of time with the
kids and my mind was never switched off.
Now things are a bit more settled.
I would go right, I'm taking day off today and it's just them,
you know what I mean? And what'll be work wise.
I get it tomorrow and that's nice.
Like I did that last Friday. It was great.
You know, I was just able to pick them up from school, go to
the park. And all day.
Three years. So like, it's just that be not.
But you know, you have to make the time.
And again, it's hard to switch off.
And I think maybe like, I think as a parent and as a partner to
my wife too, like we get that guilt where if you're going out
doing work, it's almost like, oh, and hurry back that, you
know, take a burden off there and vice versa.
Whereas I'd say to her, we we need to work on not being as
guilty. I believe in them.
Yeah, it's fine, you know, and. I think, I think you can, you
can give them so much like in terms of inheritance and all
this kind of thing, but they they will appreciate more than
any anything material material. They'll appreciate time more
all. Right.
Absolutely. There's two things, right?
Like you said, my wife made she's a fucking rock star and
she has to deal with all this, right?
We wouldn't do our stuff for them.
Exactly, guilt feeling guilty, feeling guilty that she's alone
with the kids again, she has a support system around her, but
that is that is hard one to deal with, right?
The other bit is and I started worrying about that.
How old are your kids? They're six and four.
Right, you're exactly in that age.
I might know 1 and 2 how old and two, four and two like similar.
So I was one of my business partners listening Glen Eagles
in Scotland, right? And we were talking about kids
TV shows right back in the day, right?
So have you ever seen California occasion that's not a kids TV
show? But have you ever seen where the
first, the pilot, the first episode of the seven long
season, the first episodes, the 1st 5 minutes he walks into
church, gets a blowjob from a nom, then fucks a 16 year old,
which he's not aware of, right? But like, I mean, that's the
pilot of this show, right? And this show today?
On CBeebies. Get to the point, but this like
today, this TV show would not be allowed.
Yeah, it's absolutely one of the best TV shows and it's shake my
teenage years. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He had a sex addiction after the show.
He actually did. But now comes the thing we
started. Then talking with my with my
friend. It's like how I watch it as
well. Then we got back to children's
TV shows. Right.
I'd love to know that segue. Like cow and chicken, right?
Yeah. If you put that on TV today for
kids, it's all. It's not like it won't be a
light, but I'm like today, today you have the Coco melon where
they brainwash fucking kids. I don't know what my melon
bullshit, man. It's like, what?
What am I going to guy? Yeah, fuck that bastard.
With this curl. Baby John.
Apparently kids watching Coco melons.
Give them give them like speech, like delays and stuff.
Like talk American and all your dad and the dad and Coco melons
a cock as well. But my point is right, I don't
know what I what I can have my my kids watch.
He's 2, he's 2 years old right? He loves TV watches Fucking now
your. Patrol, I'm still talking about
that from Coco Melon you mentioned on, I said.
Yeah, fucking fucking climb a tree, right?
Yeah, jump out of it. Yeah, little bitch.
Oh, the dad. Exactly.
But my kid watch, I only allow him to watch a wee bit of TV on
a Sunday. Californication.
Best TV show I'll. Tell you what's 10 out of 10
blue? Yeah.
Blue. Have you ever seen blue?
Brilliant. Don't blow your mind, yeah?
Blue is a girl I know and so it's Bingo.
Her little sister Bluey is made in Australia and you could
actually watch it. It's it's funny, it's brilliant.
Have you have you watched California Occasion?
No. But are you not going to let my
six and four year old watch that?
No, no, you shouldn't, Uncle Nico.
Said it's OK. I just wanted to what?
I just wanted to prove a point that TV shows nowadays, in fact,
when we grew up, it was we were way more lenient, right?
And I don't think that this is good that.
Even Jackass you can Really Jackass couldn't start now.
No, you know, exactly, exactly, but it has like our I think our
generation is going to be stronger with less problems than
the next generation, and that's I am really cautious about what
I'm going to have. I don't want my kids to watch
any woke bullshit on fucking TV's Coco melon the fucking
bulls. I don't.
I wanted to grow up like proper people, like like you.
See what I mean? Get.
Sucked off in church? This is it.
I mean, when he's teenager, yes, joking.
No, I'm not. But you see what?
Yeah, Entourage, another example right at.
The time. Like you can't put that on TV
anymore because we're all becoming so woke protective.
Oh fuck off. Just find the our generation are
the best. It's the best generation.
We're good people and we watch that shit and that that made us
good. Is this your wife saying you
want more blowjobs on TV? Save #1 kids TV programme right
now. Kids TV programme.
I'm going blue. Guys have chicken bobbies world
mate Montana mice. Or was the mice Montana Jones?
Yeah, blue, blue, blue is good. Like, but I don't like Holly
watches like that. Like, you know, cheerleading,
dance shows and all night. Mr Tumbles a boy or like.
Oh no. Dumber.
Did you ever watch? That yes.
What's the they were there. I like blip it, don't like him
blip it. Doesn't you're going to put your
FaceTime blipy Sometimes you'll do you mention anyone that goes
out of FaceTime Matilda FaceTime blip.
If you face down the down from local melon, I'll get on with
them. Right now and Matilda watches a
show called The Tales Grimm, which is deaf, and it's like,
it's like. About the it's.
Brilliant. It's it's on, it's on Netflix.
But it was like, I was watching their dance, like, and habits
like Hansel and Gretel. And she couldn't through the
door, so she had to cut her finger off and use it as a key.
And I was like, I don't know if you should be watching this.
He was like, but I like it. And I was like, Oh yeah, I'm.
Just trying to find old school Nickelodeon TV shows.
We were talking rock rats. Rock rats.
Yeah, for sure. Hey, Arnold.
A football head like I was in our thing and I used to be.
Yeah, yeah, People said I had a head like Hey Arnold and gave me
PTSD. It's fine, you know it's fine.
It creates man. You know it creates fucking.
We've been oh, I went into a shell for.
Then I do think like. Did you end up all right?
Yes, he did. Like the whole.
Sticks thank God I have stand up put it that way that's.
Got to be a thing again. Right, do like some terrible
castle. As told by Ginger, I mean.
What's that? Dog I remember him Iran and
stimpy dog was a guy like. As told by Ginger, which is
about a fucking ginger girl, right?
Sister. Sister.
I don't know. Oh.
What was Doug's make called? Skater.
Interest for trust for a child
and there's no. Skaters these days, I wonder.
But Rocko modern like I mean but like see by the bell thing is
just so fucking screech. Woke sex tape needed.
Stuff. Huh.
Screech. Didn't he do poo stuff?
Probably like him. Does I remember?
Somebody agree? I mean, I think generally
speaking, where everybody needs to be a bit like offence needs
to be something that happens in life.
People can't be offended. You should be your.
Choice to be offended. Yeah, but then you should also
be like, if someone says something to you and not be
like, you can't say that. Be like, I need to deal with
that better. No.
If you want to say that, you know, I'm not sticks and stones,
words will never hurt me, you know?
But people are very hurt by words, No?
Do you not agree? Yeah, I think nowadays you look
at even like comedies were made in say like the well Ferrell
era, like when they were making and John Apto, they were making
all those just fucking brilliant comedies.
They can't be me it anymore. I don't watch a lot of new stuff
that comes out. I genuinely believe that the
reason why I'm successful or I got my success on YouTube is
because I was a wee bit a wee bit.
More I had a wee bit more balls and told a wee bit more the
truth. It was a wee bit because I
wasn't as fucking local. Standard, yeah.
But bastards, you see. But that's, I feel, the only
reason why I made a wee bit of a.
But what I, what I see, like, see, like you'd watch a lot of
things and you'd almost be rolling your eyes.
But I know why that's and I know why they're saying that.
I don't know. And it's like they're doing that
for a reason to appeal to or like to bend the knee to being
Walker. Baldy stuffs illegal, isn't?
It yeah. Sex crimes brother exactly said
this if anybody. Will BBC article.
Makes fun of me being bald. That's considered to be sexual
abuse now. You can go to the Turkey for
that both but. No, listen, I you've just not
sold me, but I am. I just, I'm happy to be bald.
I look, I feel feel look better suitable here.
But people call me bald, call me balding.
Like I have a motor motorcycle gang member.
That's when I yeah, I feel we've been intimidated.
They're not a bang. Bang.
Yeah, I feel good. Where's your where's your jacket
that says like? Next door hanging up.
But no, I like leather. Yeah, wasn't really what we were
talking about. I'm a Dali.
You've done the coolest thing ever, which is sponsored
football team. I love that your name is going
to. They're calling the grind.
Are they changing name of the ground?
Yeah, yeah, Amber. Parks going to be called what?
I don't know, yeah. Any suggestions?
Let's decide it here on the pot of maybe.
She and Todd Bull. Not love that one.
I can do that temporarily. Make it temporarily sound for.
The Pride and Pinion Stadium. Prides I was really park.
Prime Pinion Park. Yeah, Yeah, yeah.
I thought about that as well. Yeah, I just options let's
figure, let's let's say that here on this part.
Pride and Pinion Park yeah is pretty great.
Yeah, you know, pride and. PPP.
Yeah, all the PPP, Yeah, the Triple P.
Here's what I I just, I love the idea of that and I would like
you to facilitate the people at Larne sending me loads of their
black training gear in a size medium.
I know that's quite specific, but I love their.
Content as well. Black and gold, all their black
and gold training stuff and put a squad number on it that no one
has. So then people see me in it.
What? Number do you want eh?
71. 28. 28 is already taken. 20th taken.
You have to like 4036 my age. Oh no problem, I would love
that. Thank.
You, I'll have that. Yeah.
OK. Thank you.
Thank you, I love that. What are you doing tomorrow?
Then why do you want it tomorrow?
I'll sort it out if you want it. Saturday and Lauren might have a
fixture so I would my plan would be to just drive around like
different centres around Lauren in the morning, just be like
getting a coffee. But do you think that'll be fun
then somebody? Match a day but.
You're saying, Todd, like, why are you dressed like that?
That's right. Yeah.
And we've got what? You've got your, your age, and
your name in the back, you fucking nerd.
I don't want my name on the back, yeah.
She admit 36 Happy birthday. Me.
You know what there is a Todd in our squad to be?
Yes, Todd. Exactly.
But isn't some week? Hey do you want me to register
this get you on the screen? If I'm registered.
Do you want to become a professional footballer?
I'm a yeah and they don't need to pay me.
This is the. Problem is with all your.
Life isn't that. The problem with this you have.
To be on. A register that's that's create
a football team. A professional football team.
And we can just say we're. No, we can't because I'll go
back. To bullies, you call this Hey
Arnold professional footballer, you know.
There you go. I love, I love that you, that
you've got the name right for the ground.
I love, you know, The thing is, I've been involved with the club
for many years, Yeah. And I fucking love the people,
right? The volunteers, everyone there
at the crimes. I love them.
The bits it gives me. I I really enjoy going there,
right. I take my wee man.
That's my thing that I do do with the wee man.
I take him with me and it, it is just, it puts me back on earth.
Never after gumbo or after all sorts of things.
What I think I am at the moment, Who do I think I am, right?
Or the shit I have to deal with sometimes going to law and just
nobody gives a fuck. Nobody.
It's just yeah, whatever. Like you're, I just love that.
I love the people involved there.
And, and we're in further talks. I've I've showed interest in the
club before with some other stuff.
I just really what like it feels like, feels like home.
I feel really, yeah. I just feel really at home
there. There's a gig.
Have you done that Reading Rooms gig yet?
We've talked about it. There's a venue in Larne.
Called the and it was cancelled. Remember.
And it's like we were doing a charity gig there, an action
concert gig and they went like few 100 holds a few 100.
They were like the venue, like, you know what, it hasn't been
done up in a while. And this it's one of the best
venues in the country. I've done it twice and I did a
tour show there. So like I I so I used to do a
character who would slit Lauren and everybody.
Why did but actually like with that venue and the fact?
That we were doing some pissed off with you about that.
I think in a tweet like years ago.
It's like out of best thing about Lauren is the road out of
it. And I'm like, I was like, fuck
Shane Todd, fuck him like you were you were saying.
Something people shouldn't get offended to reason.
I know that was listen, that was my woke period.
Sorry I. Thought it sounded like a tweet
I would have put up to be. Like fucking raging.
What is it about Lauren that is the Lauren is a go to like
Punchline? Do you know what?
But actually when you go, when you go to, it's actually like
100%. Can you imagine this right?
You have these coastal towns in fucking Spain where houses cost
clean fortunes, you can fucking build them paradise there like
no no no, you can build like. Can you imagine every like
hospitality and late meet have learned, become a destination
not like Newcastle but proper luxury?
You could actually create that alarm.
It's. But I just everyday looking at
that sea border, I'd be. Shut up.
Yeah. Boys, thank you very much for
for coming on. I really appreciate it, baby.
You've got anything you want to plug or promote?
Any shows? Big shooter.
Yes, I am doing. Highland Springs Water.
I Dave tell people. Dave takes the label of every
water he gets. Water, water.
Suppliers, if you want to sponsor me and be my official
water holler at me. Otherwise he.
Loves Highland Springs, that's why I took the label off.
But he finished the bottle anyway.
You know, I like to be hydrated like you say you want about me.
Exactly. It's good hydrated, you told.
Me. This was the best water you've
ever had. It's it's tasty water.
It's tasty. So now you did plug it, you took
the label off. Yeah, that's me.
That's what I did. 20th of December.
We're doing a big gig. Warren Point, Yuri Feel a lot
last night. Town Hall.
Yeah, come on. It's.
Brilliant venue. Who's on?
Yeah. Me, Darren, maybe another female
act who had name starts a day. I don't know, but maybe it's not
confirmed yet, but so. I had to speak in front of 150
people in Cambodia. It was the scariest thing I've
ever done. How the fuck do you do that?
What would you have to say to them?
So that's that's a fun experience that.
Can you all get off the road to me and the boys and roll
through? I fuck me, that was scary.
And what were you just like? I had to present at auction lot
which was the watch that in Bangkok.
Oh no, nearly got so that's that's why people are following
you to Bangkok. Then if you're just I've got
this watch by the way, cheers. They're coming for you.
That was well, but I've fucking how many people are going to be
in one point? It'll be probably 300, yeah.
It'll be big and two venue, yeah.
You don't need to plug pride and pinion.
Pride opinion if you want to buy or sell your watch, I'll see you
there. Yeah, Merchant Hotel.
Do you buy any watches? I buy any watches.
Do you mind people who just come and have a look?
Of course I want that. Of course, as long as we share,
we are able to share our passion.
It's not for it's not about transactions.
Like it's not. Of course you need to do
business, but selling an expensive watch needs to like
you. Let's buy a fucking 1000 LB
watch today. It doesn't work like that.
If you had a big yeah, do you have any, like, renowned
teasers? And they come in, they tease,
you'd be like, I think I want one.
Then they go and you're like a bastard.
What I do hate is from the fucking bullshitters.
Like if you're a bullshitter, come to me, act like, oh, of
this and this. I'm going to buy this and come
back to you. And it's like, don't fucking
come, just go fuck off like the. Dad and Coco mail like he.
Would do that. Like I hate that bullshit,
right? And then blank you or.
Would who would be one of your like, would David Duchovny be up
there for somebody you'd like to get a watch to?
Yes, yeah. Final question, you've so many
people have when they come over or you go to them, look home, as
I mentioned earlier, you spend the day with him, you're doing
some business. Who's the number one guy that
will come over here that you would just take out for the day?
Maybe show some watches to? I am, I think it would be Denzel
Washington and I think we can actually make that happen at
some point. We have a wee bit of a good
connection. But Denzel Washington is for me,
together with Al Pacino, we're my fate. 2 favourite actors,
right? Fair.
Like I've seen every Al Pacino movie, right, Denzel Washington,
what AG the guy is right, That will be for me depend back.
I'm not very much very quickly starstruck, but that made the
way he talks is just like. Yeah.
Wow. Here's we've been trivia.
Do you know what Al Pacino, who Al Pacino has in his phone
cover? Yes.
Yeah. Do you know Shrek?
I find that pretty weird. Al Pacino got Shrek on his
phone, loves him and he's like B wouldn't think Al Pacino with
this in this phone right now. Did you not do a voice over or
no? Do you know Al Pacino's dad
invented a really famous drink? You know Al Pacino's dad?
First name's Cap. Thank you.