1
00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:01,800
I haven't seen either use in so 
long. 

2
00:00:01,800 --> 00:00:03,240
I know. 
And can I say something? 

3
00:00:04,520 --> 00:00:09,600
You look like a DJ in Ibiza who 
was massive in the early 

4
00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:13,040
noughties and goes back once a 
year just to do like Cafe 

5
00:00:13,040 --> 00:00:13,800
Mambos. 
That was cool. 

6
00:00:13,880 --> 00:00:17,360
You're very, very close to what 
I do, like I do go to Ibiza. 

7
00:00:17,520 --> 00:00:19,800
He's DJ Lawrence John. 
You don't drop a set. 

8
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:22,960
I'll be very close to it. 
I'll be very friendly with the 

9
00:00:22,960 --> 00:00:24,840
DJ so it'll be in the. 
D You're the guy. 

10
00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:28,360
You're the guy in the DJ booth 
just getting the hands up. 

11
00:00:28,360 --> 00:00:29,800
He. 
Doesn't drop a set, but a set of

12
00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:32,280
bolts hits the floor whenever he
wears his wee shorts without the

13
00:00:32,280 --> 00:00:34,200
neck in that. 
Spent too much time with Judge 

14
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:35,880
Dudes last year. 
Judge dudes. 

15
00:00:35,880 --> 00:00:38,360
It's not. 
It's not Judge Dudes, it's his 

16
00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:40,160
brother. 
All right, Yeah, it's the one 

17
00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:41,520
that. 
I don't know the cow that they 

18
00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:43,560
can't afford. 
Yeah, judge dudes so they get. 

19
00:00:43,560 --> 00:00:47,240
Two in the hotel. 
Judge dudes couldn't get tickets

20
00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:48,720
to the real thing, but we'll 
have something. 

21
00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:50,440
Have his cousin? 
Yes, it's a second. 

22
00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:52,960
And DJ is made Wakefield. 
It's the glasses. 

23
00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:56,840
Wakefield, Wakefield. 
Wakefield or the dance act 

24
00:00:56,840 --> 00:00:58,000
Wigfield. 
Saturday. 

25
00:00:58,360 --> 00:01:01,080
Night and the air is. 
Getting how you look like you 

26
00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:03,600
DJ? 
You look like the table loves 

27
00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:04,000
that. 
That's. 

28
00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:05,920
What happens? 
Excuse me, you do. 

29
00:01:06,080 --> 00:01:08,080
Yeah, I do love that song. 
And you do look like that. 

30
00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:09,080
That's all. 
Night. 

31
00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:11,400
There's me. 
Flashbacks The Mcdermott's on 

32
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:16,000
the Glen Rd Remember McDermott 
and like just oh Jesus, the 

33
00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:18,040
toilets, the toilet. 
Set the scene. 

34
00:01:18,520 --> 00:01:20,000
Right. 
Porter Cabin. 

35
00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:23,400
Yes. 
Next field to the traveller 

36
00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:24,520
camp. 
Yep. 

37
00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:28,160
They built bricks around it 
because the Porter camp and 

38
00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:31,480
started rotting and they built a
bar. 

39
00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:34,800
The floor bounced as you walked 
on it because it was so 

40
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:36,880
unstable. 
The toilets were simply a hole 

41
00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:37,760
in the ground. 
No windows? 

42
00:01:38,280 --> 00:01:41,400
Is this like an underage disco? 
Or is there everything? 

43
00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:43,640
Anything goes. 
This is anything goes at Dan. 

44
00:01:43,720 --> 00:01:45,040
Is it still there? 
No. 

45
00:01:45,320 --> 00:01:47,560
Right. 
I don't know, just fell down or?

46
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:49,560
The peace agreement fucking 
knocked all them in the head. 

47
00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:53,000
Yeah, yeah. 
I once had a boyfriend who tried

48
00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:57,440
to start a fight with a bouncer.
Mcdaes. 

49
00:01:57,840 --> 00:02:00,280
Let's just say he woke up minus 
the tooth the next. 

50
00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:02,560
Day, he had a couple of names. 
It was called the Mcdaes. 

51
00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:04,920
It was called the Pink Pussycat.
It's called the Ballroom. 

52
00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:06,680
Ballroom romance. 
So West. 

53
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,160
Belfast to have? 
Eight different names for 

54
00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:09,720
something that. 
Are. 

55
00:02:09,919 --> 00:02:11,360
Depending on who you're talking 
about. 

56
00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:14,000
Everybody from different groups 
had a different name for it. 

57
00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:16,280
Yeah, yeah, that's it. 
But it was. 

58
00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:18,760
And then there was a Greenbrier 
and it was blown up. 

59
00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:22,640
I sounded like on it back. 
Imagine what we played in the 

60
00:02:22,640 --> 00:02:25,600
ruins of the Greenbrier. 
Because whenever I lived in Glen

61
00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:26,560
Collin, we used to. 
Oh. 

62
00:02:26,760 --> 00:02:28,840
I thought you meant like like a 
band. 

63
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,520
Oh no, it was an old. 
Collins of the Glen Brick 

64
00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:33,840
Greenbrier, it does. 
That sounds like an old Christy 

65
00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:36,240
Marshall. 
The rowans of the green barrier.

66
00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:39,240
Did. 
You would you ever socialise in 

67
00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:40,080
the same place? 
I know. 

68
00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:42,120
You're quite possibly, I can't 
remember. 

69
00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:45,640
Paddy used to bouncer at a bar 
that I worked in that did you? 

70
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:48,240
Yes, what bar? 
I worked in Mac and and he's on 

71
00:02:48,240 --> 00:02:49,960
the Glen Rose. 
The one I got my finger bit off.

72
00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:55,000
Yeah, I wasn't there that night,
so I can't point out any 

73
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,920
fingers, Can't point out any 
fingers at everyone. 

74
00:02:57,920 --> 00:03:01,200
Part of it, But what Porona does
is goes in the bars and scopes 

75
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:03,640
outdoor men's fingers and see 
you as a wee juicy fingers. 

76
00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:05,640
And then she calls her. 
She calls someone. 

77
00:03:05,640 --> 00:03:08,000
And then iPhone up the local 
teacher and go here. 

78
00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:10,840
Do you fancy making a nuisance? 
Of yourself tonight. 

79
00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:13,840
Lunch is served. 
Yeah, all right. 

80
00:03:13,840 --> 00:03:16,440
And it's like if you can serve 
it with a good key anti, you 

81
00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:18,920
won't get that mechanics but you
may get to paint the card with a

82
00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:24,840
he took you to court. 
Says he got food, I'm a body. 

83
00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:28,680
Take him off. 
No, I like, I genuinely like him

84
00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:30,000
and I didn't know they were 
bifocals. 

85
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:32,240
Are they bifocals? 
I didn't know until he walked 

86
00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:32,520
in. 
They're. 

87
00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:34,440
Not bifocals. 
They're bifocals. 

88
00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:36,040
They're not bifocals. 
There were sunglasses when you 

89
00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:38,400
walked. 
That isn't bifocals. 

90
00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:41,240
It is Dan, please. 
It's bifocals. 

91
00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:43,360
You're very quick to fucking get
him to go on that. 

92
00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:45,000
I'm not. 
They're not bifocals. 

93
00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:47,920
What if I focus on you got two 
different prescriptions? 

94
00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:49,440
In the. 
Lens bifocals are the ones you 

95
00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:51,440
have that we bit down the 
bottoms different and you see 

96
00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:55,960
people go on yeah, watch 2 
prescriptions among glasses 

97
00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:57,040
that's not. 
What I What have you got? 

98
00:03:57,400 --> 00:04:00,120
Very. 
Transitions, transitions. 

99
00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:01,440
Translation. 
What's that? 

100
00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,520
There are glasses that when you 
go out in the sunlight, they 

101
00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:06,480
turn. 
There was an albino kid in my 

102
00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:09,840
class that had those and I just 
thought it was the coolest thing

103
00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:11,160
ever. 
The only thing was they were 

104
00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:13,400
fucking like plexiglass she 
could have shot at her did. 

105
00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:15,360
That help him in any way. 
It was a her. 

106
00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:17,600
Did that help her? 
I don't know. 

107
00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:20,279
She had pink eyes. 
Well, probably did because of 

108
00:04:20,279 --> 00:04:22,079
the sun. 
Yeah, probably did. 

109
00:04:22,079 --> 00:04:25,280
Yeah, yeah, I know. 
She looked very, very easily 

110
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:26,800
sunburnt. 
She did. 

111
00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:28,720
Oh, no more. 
So, you know, one of your hair 

112
00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:31,800
doesn't hold a pigment that you 
ain't going to do well in an 

113
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:34,120
Irish summer, even. 
Yeah, you know, she had to get 

114
00:04:34,120 --> 00:04:36,400
sunburnt in the rain. 
It's as well, it wasn't born in 

115
00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:37,400
Spain or something. 
I know. 

116
00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:39,960
Well, well, no, I don't know 
about that. 

117
00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:41,600
I've never seen that been on 
holiday. 

118
00:04:41,800 --> 00:04:45,680
I have. 
Wait a minute, DJ. 

119
00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:49,160
Don't do. 
I don't get it. 

120
00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:51,120
Zippers, let me take a quick 
minute to tell you that this 

121
00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:54,720
episode of Teams Me Podcast is 
sponsored by That Price Guy, 

122
00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:59,680
Ireland's largest price site. 
I was at Price Guy HQ a couple 

123
00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:03,360
of days ago and I mean, he is 
everything. 

124
00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:06,240
He's everything sitting there. 
The cars that they're about to 

125
00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:08,800
give away, some of the prizes 
that are sitting, the boat. 

126
00:05:08,840 --> 00:05:10,720
He doesn't keep cashing the 
premises by the way, just let 

127
00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:13,040
you know they check. 
Did you do the draw? 

128
00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:16,200
I did a draw and, and here's 
what he's doing, man. 

129
00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:19,480
He was like just just do a draw.
It's like worth my 500 lbs. 

130
00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:21,680
So just whatever. 
I was like, what do you mean? 

131
00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:24,880
He goes just give away £500 
worth of stuff and we'll just 

132
00:05:25,080 --> 00:05:27,080
arrange it so it can it be 
anything? 

133
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:28,760
So he's like a hotel break in a 
meal or something. 

134
00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:30,320
But I was just picking it at the
time. 

135
00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:34,960
So I did a stay at the merchant 
and dinner at 2 tops just cross 

136
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:40,200
the road from but it was, it's 
not as tall as one. 

137
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:45,120
Umm, but incredible. 
Umm, he's just, he's, they've 

138
00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:49,000
made nine, they've made 9 
millionaires and they're giving 

139
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:53,880
away over £125 million. 
And there's, I mean, prizes for 

140
00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,320
everything from the from the top
to the bottom. 

141
00:05:56,720 --> 00:06:00,600
You can get a couple of couple 
of pence for a few grand. 

142
00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:03,520
Polly, you're right there. 
I forgot. 

143
00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:05,000
Thank you, Patrick. 
There's free ones. 

144
00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:07,360
Instant wins. 
He's got watches, he's got 

145
00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:10,000
holidays and cars and if you 
don't like the car, what can you

146
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,280
do? 
You can just take the money, 

147
00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:16,520
take the money, not prize 
guy.co.uk. 

148
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:19,320
Also patreon.com says to me 
podcast. 

149
00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:23,520
All of our specials are on their
bonus episodes on a Monday, live

150
00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:25,400
stream on a Friday. 
Lazy boys. 

151
00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:28,800
Boozy Bake Off coming soon. 
The boozy bake offs coming soon.

152
00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:31,280
We're filming that on Monday. 
This is Friday. 

153
00:06:31,280 --> 00:06:34,280
The recording this, I haven't 
drank in about five years. 

154
00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:35,960
I'm going for alpha bottle of 
gin. 

155
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,400
So we'll see what happens. 
Thank you very much. 

156
00:06:38,400 --> 00:06:40,480
Let's go back into this episode.
What do you hold? 

157
00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:41,840
On what do you mean you don't 
get it? 

158
00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:43,640
Albinos. 
If you if you're that they get. 

159
00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:47,320
I hear I love holiday. 
I love holiday, right? 

160
00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:50,800
But I burn dead easy. 
So I love that holiday. 

161
00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:54,040
I love holiday. 
Well, don't do is. 

162
00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:56,560
I love holiday. 
Like it's a verb. 

163
00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,600
But I'm just saying like it's if
you're not, I love. 

164
00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:01,480
Holiday. 
I love the holiday. 

165
00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:02,800
If. 
I was. 

166
00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:07,400
Having the laugh on holiday if. 
I was if I was to go sex on. 

167
00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:09,440
Bitch. 
And you're in albino. 

168
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,480
You can't do your thing. 
You can't work like what? 

169
00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:12,960
You have to wait until night 
time to work. 

170
00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:14,800
You're. 
Not a fucking vampire, buddy. 

171
00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:17,200
Will you tag me or if you're in 
albino? 

172
00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:22,320
ESPN, Do you know what I. 
Mean interview with the albino 

173
00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:27,360
that don't cruise. 
Louis, Louis, Louis. 

174
00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:30,440
Always. 
Blame person going away on 

175
00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:33,880
holiday. 
Blame person, what did you say? 

176
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,280
You're saying you've seen no 
blind people? 

177
00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:37,440
The. 
Weirdest thing they haven't 

178
00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:39,120
seen. 
The weirdest thing I see is a 

179
00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:42,440
blame person on the sightseeing 
tour bus in Belfast. 

180
00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:44,840
There's an audio. 
Part of it I know. 

181
00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:46,760
But fucking. 
You could sit and fell, but 

182
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:49,400
you'd sit your house where 
you're from, like you come the 

183
00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:51,080
whole there was like on the 
House. 

184
00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:53,320
There was a blame on our hotel 
last year, right? 

185
00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:58,440
And he was a poor bastard, sat 
inside all day drinking, right? 

186
00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:01,920
And then at night time, right? 
But then at night time he was 

187
00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:03,240
sitting there and I felt bad for
him. 

188
00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:05,480
And I went up and I was like, do
you want to drink? 

189
00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:11,080
And he said to me, I'm not gay. 
I mean, I said it were bifocals,

190
00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:13,720
I'm not bi. 
And I said them, I wasn't asked.

191
00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:15,320
Did you want to drink? 
I know that there's loads of 

192
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,280
kids and all around the bench. 
I thought you weren't going to 

193
00:08:17,280 --> 00:08:21,080
the bar because, you know, yeah,
there was too many kids and you 

194
00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:22,040
would get knocked over or 
something. 

195
00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:25,400
And he was like, no, I'm not 
having a bar. 

196
00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:27,680
Job he was. 
German, he says. 

197
00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:30,000
I'm not on the bar because I've 
drank too much during the day 

198
00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:31,640
and I'm just sitting here 
because I can't get up. 

199
00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:34,919
And he likes holiday. 
And I was like, right. 

200
00:08:34,919 --> 00:08:37,280
And he went and I did get here 
the whole way from Germany 

201
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:40,000
without anybody helping me. 
So I don't see why you need to 

202
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:40,760
help me. 
And I was like. 

203
00:08:40,840 --> 00:08:42,480
He's 1:00 AM disabled people to 
go, you can. 

204
00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:43,840
Do it yourself, I said. 
Tell him. 

205
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:45,520
Why didn't you just stand 
fucking Germany and turn the 

206
00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:47,680
heat up? 
Yeah, I see what you mean. 

207
00:08:47,680 --> 00:08:50,000
But then if you're on, if you're
blind, then you're on a 

208
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:53,240
sightseeing bus, you're hearing.
The better the atmosphere 

209
00:08:53,240 --> 00:08:55,560
because they can hear better, so
you're hearing. 

210
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:58,280
You can smell the harp and the 
pace off the people around. 

211
00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:00,440
But you'll get away, you know, 
if you're an international 

212
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,200
touristy or you're on the bus, 
you'll get away in the distance.

213
00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:04,560
You know you're not getting out 
at home. 

214
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:07,680
You can go to the Causeway and 
feel the way the Atlantic wait 

215
00:09:07,680 --> 00:09:10,480
like the IT isn't. 
Actually, it isn't at all. 

216
00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:13,960
You can feel the mist of the 
morning on your face. 

217
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,680
They should make that part of 
the way, the Atlantic way. 

218
00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:16,360
They should. 
They should. 

219
00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:19,040
I'm going to start a campaign, 
get that go right around the 

220
00:09:19,040 --> 00:09:19,640
coast. 
Yeah. 

221
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:20,720
Do you know what's even worse, 
though? 

222
00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:22,680
What if you're in Albina and 
you're blind? 

223
00:09:22,680 --> 00:09:26,320
Typically they technically are 
blind and then you don't know 

224
00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:29,320
when to go outside on holiday, 
but that. 

225
00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,240
Someone could tell you. 
Is that not my point? 

226
00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:33,400
I. 
Suppose I suppose. 

227
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,160
Do you know what you 2 both 
thought you'd work something out

228
00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:38,920
there and you haven't? 
We didn't didn't work anything 

229
00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:41,080
out at. 
All what have you. 

230
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:43,600
Ever seen an albino? 
Yeah, that's. 

231
00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:45,280
Right. 
I don't think we're albino 

232
00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:47,400
spotting here. 
It's not albino rhinoceros. 

233
00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:50,600
It's just a person. 
That's your DJ name, Albino. 

234
00:09:51,080 --> 00:09:54,760
Albino still in comedy, is it? 
Umm made. 

235
00:09:54,880 --> 00:09:56,720
Made of. 
On the local scene, I don't 

236
00:09:56,720 --> 00:10:00,880
think so. 
The closest would be Karen 

237
00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:03,160
Franco. 
Karen Franco's an albino. 

238
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:05,640
No, I'm saying he's he's great 
for her. 

239
00:10:06,680 --> 00:10:08,720
It's not fair, does it? 
Blonde her? 

240
00:10:09,080 --> 00:10:12,880
No, he doesn't. 
Nah, No, He has Ginger Her. 

241
00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:14,920
Yeah. 
Is he Ginger Feared. 

242
00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:18,840
And a moustache. 
You're albino. 

243
00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:20,440
You're probably the closest 
thing to the albino. 

244
00:10:20,480 --> 00:10:21,680
You're blonde, hard and blue 
out. 

245
00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:23,160
He looks Albanian. 
That's. 

246
00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:30,160
I love Holiday. 
You just finished her still. 

247
00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:32,560
I just turned in the. 
I just did that same thing. 

248
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:34,160
You just finished. 
Her. 

249
00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:37,640
You know I'm not finished here 
still. 

250
00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:39,600
On. 
Still on. 

251
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:42,040
I'm finished and I feel like 
it's like summer holidays, but 

252
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:43,360
everyone's still at school. 
Yeah. 

253
00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:45,320
Do you know what I mean? 
I'm calling for people at their 

254
00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:47,120
door and all they're like, 
you're not, you've done live 

255
00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:49,800
here 20 years. 
Yeah, his daddy only comes here 

256
00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:51,600
on the weekends, so that's 
whenever we see. 

257
00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:54,080
Him I I hate and love finishing 
the tour. 

258
00:10:54,080 --> 00:10:56,560
It's great because the tour is 
done, but then the show was at 

259
00:10:56,560 --> 00:11:00,080
its best. 
It's the best it's going to be. 

260
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:02,000
And you're like I need to do 
this more. 

261
00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:05,200
I'm doing two different tours at
the moment. 

262
00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:07,920
It's really confusing. 
Oh shit. 

263
00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:10,360
I had that at COVID so why? 
Why do they overlap? 

264
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:14,520
Because I'm doing this Paddy 
Irishman tour and I wanted to do

265
00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:16,640
it in Scotland and England 
because I want to take that the 

266
00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:18,880
America. 
So I wanted to see if it worked 

267
00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:20,400
on Irish people that don't live 
here. 

268
00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:23,120
Yes, So I've done that tour to 
try it out. 

269
00:11:23,640 --> 00:11:26,280
So in the middle of doing the 
Dagger tour, I started doing the

270
00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:29,280
Paddy Irishman tour and then 
when I came home I went to 

271
00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:30,960
theatre. 
Miller started doing the Paddy 

272
00:11:30,960 --> 00:11:33,280
Aishman show instead of the 
Dagger show on stage. 

273
00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:35,520
By mistake. 
By mistake because I've been 

274
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,960
doing it right and I was like 
what the fuck are you doing? 

275
00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:41,120
This is a different and then so 
I confused myself, yeah. 

276
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,760
I'm saying if you have two gigs 
back-to-back and you're not sure

277
00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:46,680
whether or not you've told that 
joke in the same set, you're 

278
00:11:46,680 --> 00:11:48,320
right, yes. 
If I do know what I'm talking 

279
00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:51,080
about, you go. 
If I said this already, I repeat

280
00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:53,040
myself to you. 
Never mind. 

281
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,560
Did my playing Joe's crash? 
And then I'm writing a new show 

282
00:11:55,680 --> 00:11:59,120
which is. 
Go to, go to, go to. 

283
00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:02,280
I love it. 
Actually, I know I saw a party 

284
00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:04,240
in the chemist. 
Dear love him, didn't it? 

285
00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:06,800
Dear love him, Saw him in the. 
Camp getting this prescription 

286
00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:08,760
he. 
Was getting this prescription he

287
00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:12,080
was sitting nervous as we food 
out and all God love him weren't

288
00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:13,720
you thank. 
You guys, the camels are like, 

289
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:14,960
you really don't need to choose 
it. 

290
00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:17,080
I know. 
Give us a picture. 

291
00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:19,960
We're talking about none, man. 
Seen the dagger? 

292
00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:22,760
Sure. 
She ain't seen him more and 

293
00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:24,440
most. 
We have probably seen it three 

294
00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:26,160
times. 
I've never seen that, and I 

295
00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:29,000
really want to see it to the 
point where I know it's 

296
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:31,640
inappropriate, right? 
But I asked. 

297
00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:33,480
If you're about to say, get your
deck out. 

298
00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:35,600
Yeah. 
No, this would be a great clue. 

299
00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:38,720
Patty, Patty. 
He doesn't get it out as much 

300
00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:40,440
anymore. 
I'll say this, he don't get it 

301
00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:41,760
anymore. 
I mean, Andrea would knock my 

302
00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,960
bollocks in, but I'm not 
interested in just one. 

303
00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:45,800
But when he shows you, it's not 
a sexual thing. 

304
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:47,280
It's not. 
I don't want to see it that way.

305
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:49,760
I just want to see it, yeah. 
Literally when you've seen it 

306
00:12:49,760 --> 00:12:51,480
was hard. 
It's like a waiter showing you a

307
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:53,480
bottle of wine. 
Yes, and you go he. 

308
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:55,520
Does this it's worth? 
A wee sample of. 

309
00:12:55,680 --> 00:12:58,920
Them, yes. 
Give me the whole thing. 

310
00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:01,000
Very Woody. 
Give me the balls too. 

311
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:04,640
Yeah, I just want, I asked you, 
Sean, have you had a photo of 

312
00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:06,960
it? 
You asked my brother. 

313
00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:08,360
He did. 
You asked me. 

314
00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:10,520
You asked his brother if he had 
a photo of his. 

315
00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:11,880
Dick Yeah. 
And then he asked, it was like, 

316
00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:13,880
would it be weird if you asked 
him for a picture of it? 

317
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:15,560
And he was like, yes, Bruno, it 
would be weird. 

318
00:13:15,560 --> 00:13:17,600
He's my brother. 
And I was like, well if he ever 

319
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,600
send you a picture, will you 
send me? 

320
00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:21,800
Even seen it. 
He must have. 

321
00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:22,960
No, he hasn't. 
I mean half. 

322
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,640
Half of it, yeah. 
Well, I feel very fucking 

323
00:13:25,640 --> 00:13:27,560
excluded now. 
Yeah, no, he hasn't. 

324
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,800
Dan hasn't seen it. 
Mick hasn't seen it. 

325
00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:31,680
The day we got it, did you see 
it? 

326
00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:33,480
Oh, the. 
Day we got the tattoo. 

327
00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:35,120
Tattoo day we saw. 
Oh, right. 

328
00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:36,240
OK. 
I need to see it. 

329
00:13:36,520 --> 00:13:37,040
Yeah. 
I'm. 

330
00:13:37,080 --> 00:13:38,120
Sorry, it's got. 
To be done. 

331
00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:40,640
Sorry, Dan, you weren't there. 
I mean, he asked Andrea to send 

332
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:42,560
me a picture of it. 
She just didn't look either, 

333
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:43,680
does she not? 
Why not? 

334
00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:46,200
Close. 
You were now you were thinking 

335
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:49,040
about showing to the audience 
after you show, but. 

336
00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:53,600
Did the original tag show that 
we had a photo of it and we put 

337
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:56,360
it till a vote and the folded 
not to see it? 

338
00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:59,560
So there is a. 
OK. 

339
00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:01,920
Imagine thousands of people 
being like I don't want. 

340
00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:04,680
It wasn't, it was literally like
80 people in the queues, right? 

341
00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:06,880
And it was all couples. 
And I think what happened 

342
00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:11,000
because then a lot of them away 
from the show sent me messages 

343
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:12,680
going just send me a pic of it 
now. 

344
00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:15,680
I didn't want to say in front of
her or the opposite way I don't 

345
00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:19,000
want to say in front of him. 
Why were they so fucking? 

346
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:20,920
I don't. 
Know anybody? 

347
00:14:20,920 --> 00:14:22,960
We're going to do it. 
And then it was just like, no, 

348
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:25,360
we can't do it in the Odyssey. 
Like which would have been the 

349
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:26,920
perfect time to have big 
screens. 

350
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:30,080
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 
Be like zoom in. 

351
00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:33,400
You wouldn't have to zoom zoom. 
What have you been doing the 

352
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:35,160
last couple of months? 
I've been, I haven't. 

353
00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:37,080
Seen you since I haven't seen 
both of you since Stars in your 

354
00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:38,400
eyes. 
Stars in the eyes. 

355
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,920
We might do what we do yet. 
Next year, actually. 

356
00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:42,440
That'd be good. 
Isn't that right? 

357
00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:44,360
He's the DJ, I'm the singer. 
Yeah. 

358
00:14:45,440 --> 00:14:48,680
First I've heard of it but yeah 
I'm just dude that day. 

359
00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:51,320
You had the Fool dance troupe 
with you. 

360
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,120
I did, yeah. 
I was brilliant. 

361
00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:54,240
Yeah. 
We were robbed. 

362
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:58,040
They were robbed, not me. 
When you have kids like that, 

363
00:14:58,040 --> 00:14:59,440
you do think that the kids are 
going to win. 

364
00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:01,880
It wasn't even. 
I didn't really care about the 

365
00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:03,680
winning, but the kids just loved
that they didn't. 

366
00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:06,600
They had a ball. 
I everybody was outstanding, 

367
00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:11,600
loved it, everybody was. 
They had a great I loved the 

368
00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:14,400
fact that I can get to do stuff 
like that. 

369
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:17,520
Yeah, I do too. 
It's a real privilege. 

370
00:15:18,120 --> 00:15:21,120
My brother fucking plays music 
and and for him like to do that 

371
00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:23,360
would be massive. 
You know, to be yes, yes, but I 

372
00:15:23,520 --> 00:15:27,080
but I always pick an act that I 
like your song or whatever. 

373
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,640
Do you know what I mean? 
You you looked brilliant. 

374
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:32,640
Yeah, you really did. 
Like with the with the furlough.

375
00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:36,000
No, the best part for me was 
Patty sitting there in changing 

376
00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:40,520
rooms or in the green room and 
he was going fucking phone won't

377
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:43,280
let me in. 
And I was like, Patty, you're. 

378
00:15:43,280 --> 00:15:45,320
Like you're. 
Dressed like Freddie Murphy. 

379
00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:46,720
Freddie. 
Murphy, Freddie Murphy. 

380
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:52,560
The West Belfast live in Mac and
he's just. 

381
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:56,080
Sunday from fucking big. 
Pussycat Freddie Murphy. 

382
00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:59,160
Only *** in the Megan Lilies. 
Oh no. 

383
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:01,040
My favourite. 
Benefit to break out. 

384
00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:08,800
Freddy's capitating, yeah. 
I. 

385
00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:11,000
Read enough, everybody said as 
soon as. 

386
00:16:11,040 --> 00:16:13,840
Freddy Freddy's capitating. 
You've nailed it as soon as you 

387
00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:15,360
walk. 
In we're actually first driving 

388
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,920
down and people like at the 
balls in the falls at the 

389
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:20,480
Derunabad looking in their car 
and I'm looking back at them and

390
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:23,200
they were going who the fuck is 
that weirdo weed? 

391
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:27,160
I was really weird. 
I had to park so far away from 

392
00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:29,120
the fucking venue. 
Walking up the street, people 

393
00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:31,240
were just, there's a girl 
running ahead of me. 

394
00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:33,720
Like she was like, what? 
This is obviously fucking a 

395
00:16:33,720 --> 00:16:34,920
freak show here. 
Yeah. 

396
00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:35,960
But she's seen people like that 
all. 

397
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:38,520
The time your eyes was such a 
fun night. 

398
00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:40,280
I love it. 
When I finished it and they read

399
00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:43,200
to me, it was great that you 
sang it in the original key. 

400
00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:46,400
And I was like, could I have got
a different key? 

401
00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:48,480
Yeah. 
It was so hard to sing. 

402
00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:51,080
Oh really? 
The first time I sang it was on 

403
00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:53,960
the night, right? 
And the Testimony and I was just

404
00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:58,240
like, holy fuck, that is like. 
Because he is he obviously 

405
00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:00,160
Butler won. 
See his soundcheck. 

406
00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:02,120
I don't know if you saw it, it 
was shit show. 

407
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:03,560
Was it? 
So was mine. 

408
00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:06,119
He messed it up real bad. 
And I was on that purpose, he 

409
00:17:06,119 --> 00:17:07,000
told me. 
Did he? 

410
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:07,880
No, he didn't. 
He did. 

411
00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,040
Did he see if he did? 
That's like Patrick Bateman, 

412
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:13,160
American Psycho level. 
Really. 

413
00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:15,760
No, I get why you would do that.
Why? 

414
00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:18,160
Because. 
Everyone want everybody to see 

415
00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:20,440
the class performance because he
was fucking unreal. 

416
00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:22,760
They say a bad rehearsal makes 
for a good performance. 

417
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:23,880
That'd. 
Be great, genuine. 

418
00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:26,720
Why would you show people what's
going to happen and let them 

419
00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,920
just be on the night? 
And that was what happened. 

420
00:17:29,120 --> 00:17:30,680
Yeah. 
And I thought he was brilliant. 

421
00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:32,160
I thought the whole thing was 
class. 

422
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:34,560
Tommy and Throne were brilliant.
I didn't get to see. 

423
00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:36,720
Those run the MC. 
They didn't get to see them 

424
00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:38,120
either. 
In fact, I'm going to watch it, 

425
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:41,560
yes. 
But yes, I've been writing a 

426
00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:42,920
play for the past couple of 
months. 

427
00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:44,280
Oh yeah, yeah. 
What's it about? 

428
00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:46,480
I've been doing workshops in the
new lodge. 

429
00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:50,240
Nikki is here and it's about 
right. 

430
00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:53,880
It doesn't sound as fun as it 
is, but it's about the youth 

431
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:56,960
that are living in the new Lodge
and it's about, I have written 

432
00:17:56,960 --> 00:17:59,880
it, sort of words like 
intergenerational trauma and 

433
00:17:59,880 --> 00:18:02,520
dilemmas, but it's funny. 
Have you written a play before? 

434
00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:05,280
Yes, that's what I originally 
said. 

435
00:18:06,360 --> 00:18:11,320
That I, I don't, I don't think I
would have the patience for it. 

436
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:13,920
It's you would have. 
You ever been in a play? 

437
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:16,960
One years ago, couple of 
performances. 

438
00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,320
You know, you know, the crack 
was it then kind of. 

439
00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:23,040
It is really so much work for 
very little return. 

440
00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:26,120
So I had very few lines, but 
what I'm saying is I couldn't 

441
00:18:26,120 --> 00:18:26,920
do. 
You don't cook. 

442
00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:30,760
I tried to snap coke once but 
all the ice cubes get stuck up 

443
00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:32,680
my nose. 
Go on ahead. 

444
00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:35,040
Sorry. 
It's a fizz I can't like I. 

445
00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:38,240
Couldn't see the way you're 
doing like a one man show. 

446
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:41,560
That's a play. 
We stand up, we can change the 

447
00:18:41,560 --> 00:18:43,680
wording of whatever we want. 
We can flip things around. 

448
00:18:43,680 --> 00:18:46,240
We can start a show that doesn't
the show you start, but you can 

449
00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:48,120
eventually turn it into a show. 
It needs to be. 

450
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:52,080
I couldn't, I don't have the 
ability to learn all those 

451
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:54,400
lines. 
The play I was in, I had maybe 5

452
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:58,120
lines in it. 
I I I couldn't do it. 

453
00:18:58,200 --> 00:18:59,640
It's like school. 
I can't I. 

454
00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:02,320
Couldn't realise how hard A1 man
show would be. 

455
00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:04,600
Another to say one man show, one
person show no. 

456
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:06,160
You can't say one man. 
Show can you? 

457
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:11,160
Well, I was the only one on it, 
but it was like 5 weeks of full 

458
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:15,960
on 10 hours a day rehearsal and 
I was like. 

459
00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:18,720
I couldn't do it. 
I don't have the capacity. 

460
00:19:18,720 --> 00:19:19,360
But it is. 
Hard. 

461
00:19:19,360 --> 00:19:23,400
It was 2 halves like so it was 
like, yeah, proper and the first

462
00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:27,080
native don't. 
It went from from 48 minutes in 

463
00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:30,200
the first half and 37 minutes in
the second-half. 

464
00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:34,600
I'd done the first night in like
27 minutes and 20. 

465
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,120
Did you? 
Yeah, but. 

466
00:19:36,120 --> 00:19:37,600
That's good. 
Tony was like, I don't know how 

467
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:38,720
I still got to stand on the 
Vision. 

468
00:19:38,920 --> 00:19:40,600
Tony was like, I don't know how 
you've done that. 

469
00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:43,320
I really don't know how you've 
done that, but you need to slow 

470
00:19:43,320 --> 00:19:46,040
it down. 
And I think it was me going so. 

471
00:19:46,040 --> 00:19:47,640
You didn't. 
You didn't drop any lines. 

472
00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:50,160
You were just. 
Saying we've all done that with 

473
00:19:50,160 --> 00:19:52,400
stand up before, Yeah. 
You come off stage, you're like,

474
00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:57,600
you just rush through it, yeah. 
Sometimes he treads the boards. 

475
00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:59,280
I have crept the boards in my 
room. 

476
00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:02,120
I am an actor. 
Yeah. 

477
00:20:02,280 --> 00:20:04,000
Is it something you would want 
to do more like? 

478
00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:06,680
I love acting. 
I love, I do love it. 

479
00:20:06,760 --> 00:20:09,240
Folks, sometimes you have to 
take a moment to thank somebody 

480
00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:12,240
in your life, and you know what?
You're doing that as a joke. 

481
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:15,520
I was going to thank you. 
I was going to thank, can I 

482
00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:18,760
thank you for thanking me? 
I want to thank Patty McDonald 

483
00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:23,160
and the local comics that we 
have here and the Belfast comedy

484
00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:25,880
scene for for coming and making 
this podcast what it is, for 

485
00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:29,240
calling in and doing episodes 
and making it a great stand up 

486
00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,720
scene. 
This month's all about gratitude

487
00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:34,480
and along with the person I just
thank Patty McDonald. 

488
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,520
There's other people that we 
don't thank enough and that is 

489
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:42,960
ourselves. 
It's sometimes hard to remind 

490
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,600
ourselves that we're trying our 
best to make sense of everything

491
00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:48,160
and in this crazy world, that's 
not easy. 

492
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:53,480
So isn't it so there's a 
reminder to give thanks to the 

493
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:55,040
people in your life, including 
yourself. 

494
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:58,680
If you're thinking of starting 
therapy, give Better Help a try.

495
00:20:59,120 --> 00:21:01,640
It's entirely online, so you 
don't have to go somewhere and 

496
00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:03,040
do it. 
You can just do it from the 

497
00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:04,920
comfort of your own home. 
And it's designed to be 

498
00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:07,600
convenient, flexible. 
And so to do your schedule, you 

499
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:10,040
fill out a brief questionnaire, 
You get much of A licenced 

500
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:12,280
therapist, and if you don't like
your therapist or think you're 

501
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compatible, you can switch at 
any time for no extra charge. 

502
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:20,120
betterhelp.com/T with me today 
to get 10% off your first month.

503
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:23,520
That's better help hlp.com/T 
with me. 

504
00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:26,280
The link is in the description. 
And once again, thank you party.

505
00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:29,000
Thank you man. 
I love writing. 

506
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:31,000
Acting. 
But if I can just come in and do

507
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:35,040
something and then go, I don't, 
I don't like it when you do it. 

508
00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:37,680
And then they're like porn. 
We're turning the camera porn. 

509
00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:41,040
No, I've heard porns tell. 
Them I, I don't think that's in 

510
00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:43,000
it, I don't think that's going 
and I think they're. 

511
00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:44,400
Yeah, they're. 
They're all I. 

512
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:48,280
Don't think I could do porn, I 
don't think I could perform. 

513
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:50,840
Because of the dagger. 
Oh, with people in the. 

514
00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:52,360
Room just genuinely don't think 
it could. 

515
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:54,280
I don't think it could have sex 
in front of the people that 

516
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:55,280
don't. 
I don't really. 

517
00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,880
I don't like I really. 
Get a bit shy, apparently porn 

518
00:21:57,880 --> 00:22:01,960
sets smell terrible. 
I read or read it and it was 

519
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:05,440
like, you know, that an AMA 
asked me anything and it was I'm

520
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:07,840
a porn director asked me 
anything and he. 

521
00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:10,320
Was by the way guy on Reddit 
that says you porn director not 

522
00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:12,520
a porn director. 
He's in his moms basement. 

523
00:22:12,960 --> 00:22:15,840
Well, he's not a porn director. 
He has filmed his brother and 

524
00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:18,400
sister fucking. 
He does have picture of if you 

525
00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:21,480
said him any picture brother. 
You have but there there's 

526
00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:24,760
podcast as well, you know, by 
people and they're they're good.

527
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:27,600
Like I would listen in now and 
again and they'll talk about 

528
00:22:27,600 --> 00:22:29,400
there's there's porn actors and 
actresses. 

529
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:31,960
There's one that's female led 
and they would talk. 

530
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:33,400
There's a horny housewife 
podcast. 

531
00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:35,520
Very good fucking bitch giving 
her a plug. 

532
00:22:37,120 --> 00:22:40,360
But they that to me or just a? 
What your? 

533
00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:43,120
Your your browser. 
Somebody said to me, I was 

534
00:22:43,120 --> 00:22:45,680
listening to somebody. 
I'll say that to me. 

535
00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:47,600
That's a second thing. 
Horny housewife in your area. 

536
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:53,400
My phone's my phone's going to 
going to stop being chicken 

537
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:54,800
burgers. 
It's going to be horny Housewife

538
00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:56,880
podcast. 
Yeah, our phones listen to us, 

539
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,480
but yeah, supposedly it's, you 
know, it's. 

540
00:22:59,840 --> 00:23:02,760
It's not the way it looks. 
It's not the way it looks, no. 

541
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,760
And then what about your woman 
that had the thousand men or 

542
00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:06,960
something? 
The Thousand. 

543
00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:08,960
Oh yes. 
You know, and she was like, just

544
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:10,880
like a really tough day in the 
bedroom. 

545
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:12,760
And I was like, no, I don't know
what. 

546
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:17,600
The thousands guys like. 
Jesus Christ like be like we 

547
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:19,680
have no wands in a fucking cave.
Hard. 

548
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:20,960
Desperate. 
Seriously. 

549
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:23,840
To fucking stand in a queue to 
get a buck, no. 

550
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:30,120
You. 
Know what I mean? 

551
00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:32,480
It's like. 
I don't get it and she said you,

552
00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:35,120
I don't know if it's the same. 
There's two of them that do it 

553
00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:36,920
shows loads. 
I don't get people paying for 

554
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:38,040
sex either. 
I really don't. 

555
00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:39,920
Yeah, I don't. 
I don't get that either. 

556
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,320
Everybody pays for sex, 
regardless of whether or not you

557
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:44,080
think. 
You're but I mean like cold. 

558
00:23:44,120 --> 00:23:46,840
People in the back. 
Yeah, do you know what I mean? 

559
00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:50,120
There's one of the girls who 
does that recently was like 50 

560
00:23:50,120 --> 00:23:53,080
guys. 
Is it 50 or 500 guys in my back 

561
00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:54,400
door? 
And then she need to get 

562
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:55,720
reconstructive surgery, she 
said. 

563
00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:58,040
But I don't. 
But I don't think that best 

564
00:23:58,040 --> 00:24:00,280
true. 
I think the exact see the girl 

565
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:06,280
Bonnie Blue right and you've 
I've seen her on com podcast and

566
00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:08,560
stuff just. 
Do you have her on here? 

567
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:15,000
No, not like, not that I'm like,
I just I don't see. 

568
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:19,120
You only watch her online, you 
don't want her in real you. 

569
00:24:19,120 --> 00:24:20,800
Never meet your heroes. 
Shovel over. 

570
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:25,920
Let me tell you, I I think it 
looks so awkward when you see 

571
00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:27,160
you're like interviewed on 
things. 

572
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:29,920
I don't think she's having good 
crack doing it. 

573
00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:31,000
I don't think it's fun. 
Is. 

574
00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:33,280
This The interviews that we're 
talking about are the. 

575
00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:38,200
Videos I I I, I just feel sad. 
You just really can't take. 

576
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:41,160
Sex work is real work and fair 
play, you know, fair play to 

577
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:42,960
those girls. 
But I just don't know how you 

578
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:45,520
can go on in life knowing that 
everybody's seen your cat. 

579
00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:48,200
Do you know what I mean? 
Like you're going to go and 

580
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:50,200
bring your kids to school. 
If your cat goes missing and put

581
00:24:50,200 --> 00:24:52,720
it up in the lamp. 
Put it was just putting the lamp

582
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:56,200
post up or having my pussy many 
yeah, but you know. 

583
00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:58,600
Join me from the next video. 
Imagine that Bonnie Blue lost 

584
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:01,160
their cat. 
Lost their cat. 

585
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:03,120
Or literal cat. 
Or literal. 

586
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:07,000
Cat. 
Even Bonnie Blue blue waffle I 

587
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:08,800
don't like the choice of blue in
your. 

588
00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:10,680
I've never seen that. 
The blue waffle? 

589
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:12,880
You've never seen it. 
You've never Googled blue 

590
00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:15,320
waffle? 
So, and I'll tell you this also,

591
00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:18,240
I don't know fully what it is, I
just know what's something to do

592
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,680
with that vagina. 
Don't. 

593
00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:22,880
Do not Google it. 
Don't, don't, don't, don't bring

594
00:25:22,880 --> 00:25:24,240
it. 
You're not getting to not see 

595
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:25,400
it. 
Don't bring it up to live my 

596
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:26,240
life. 
Don't bring it up. 

597
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:27,440
Yes. 
No, no, no. 

598
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:28,720
She. 
Describe it I don't want to see.

599
00:25:28,720 --> 00:25:30,720
It I like waffles by the Jonas 
Brothers, that's as far. 

600
00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:33,400
As OK, well, I will describe it 
then I will look at it and 

601
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:34,440
describe it. 
OK, I don't. 

602
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:38,560
I don't think so. 
You've it's 100% been put in the

603
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:41,400
WhatsApp group you're in, no. 
I'm not in WhatsApp groups, I'm 

604
00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:45,080
only in one. 
Genuinely, I don't. 

605
00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:48,240
Right, so. 
Is it? 

606
00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:50,400
Is it rubbing against the 
jacket? 

607
00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:53,520
The Julie. 
The Julie, it's, it's like 

608
00:25:53,520 --> 00:25:54,640
you're going. 
To describe this. 

609
00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:56,680
For us, I will describe it. 
For you I will describe it. 

610
00:25:56,680 --> 00:25:57,800
I don't even know what it. 
Is. 

611
00:25:57,800 --> 00:26:00,000
I don't know what it is. 
You don't know what? 

612
00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:02,280
It is you sort of went knew 
something. 

613
00:26:02,480 --> 00:26:06,000
I know the area it's in. 
I don't know what makes it a 

614
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,800
blue waffle. 
Hold on, it's actually showing 

615
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,320
me blue waffles here. 
That's why I'm. 

616
00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:11,040
Trying to find. 
Blue water. 

617
00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:12,280
Is it a vagina? 
The. 

618
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:16,320
Vagina. 
The vagina, right So. 

619
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:20,280
Oh, so this is like a fucking? 
I thought this was like a 

620
00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:23,440
fucking her or something. 
No, no. 

621
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:24,720
The blue waffle. 
The blue. 

622
00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:26,960
Waffle Oh, it also unlike 
somewhere where like Barry 

623
00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:28,280
Manilow would have had a 
residency. 

624
00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:33,200
Right. 
He's doing 20 nights at the Blue

625
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:35,400
Waffle, Yeah. 
That waffle sounds like 

626
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:36,880
somewhere we do calmly. 
There's loads of. 

627
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:39,560
Different blue waffles now. 
Oh, he knows this gig. 

628
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:40,840
And Antwerp. 
So it's the. 

629
00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:43,560
Blue Waffle give him a shout. 
Is it a crusty folly? 

630
00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:46,400
Have you ever seen like the 
coral reefs? 

631
00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:48,600
Yeah. 
Right. 

632
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:55,160
Imagine that growing on a vulva,
right? 

633
00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:57,160
Well, this is These are pretty 
cold. 

634
00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:58,840
Put your hands up in this room 
if you've seen it. 

635
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:04,800
I just looked, is that it? 
That's a lesser bad one, right? 

636
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:09,200
That's not as bad as the action.
The original blue waffle I shall

637
00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:11,480
show you, right? 
There's there's the like. 

638
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:17,120
That I have been to the I have 
swam at the coral reef and it 

639
00:27:17,120 --> 00:27:18,760
doesn't look like that. 
It's not in Australia. 

640
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:20,560
In the Maldives there was a 
coral reef. 

641
00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:22,960
That looks like a OH. 
I'm thinking a Great Barrier 

642
00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:27,840
Reef. 
Cyber flashing you but yes. 

643
00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:30,120
So it's basically a septic 
vulva. 

644
00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:35,720
You ever been snorkelling? 
Snorkelling, hi and and the 

645
00:27:35,720 --> 00:27:40,480
McDermott. 
Is snorkelling a sex thing? 

646
00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:41,720
Is it? 
No, is it not? 

647
00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:43,440
I'm sure it is. 
Everything is a batch. 

648
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:46,440
Literally everything is a batch.
If you go, if I said can I try 

649
00:27:46,440 --> 00:27:49,480
on that Geely, people will be 
like he's trying to try on his 

650
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:50,680
Geely. 
Yeah. 

651
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:52,160
It probably is some sort of sex 
thing. 

652
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:55,240
Do you ever hear me women 
calling them Gilletts from the 

653
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:56,240
West? 
What money? 

654
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:57,920
I'm Gallup. 
My favourite thing is worker 

655
00:27:57,920 --> 00:27:59,600
class people saying they're 
going to Portugal. 

656
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:03,480
My Grand always said Portugal. 
Portugal, yeah. 

657
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:05,080
And he's on the holidays coming 
up. 

658
00:28:05,520 --> 00:28:07,200
He's. 
Well. 

659
00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:10,440
Snorkelling in the front. 
We're going snorkelling Nikki 

660
00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:13,080
and I. 
We're going to San Francisco at 

661
00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:14,800
the end of the month. 
I'm just back. 

662
00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:17,120
Are you we? 
We're talking about doing gigs, 

663
00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:18,400
Sir. 
No. 

664
00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:19,680
Are you asking? 
Me about doing gigs, Sir. 

665
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:22,720
No, no. 
No, if you're going to. 

666
00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:26,560
To San Francisco. 
Are you just going? 

667
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:29,760
There, we're just going there 
for and it's their screen shoot 

668
00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:32,040
productions we're going with. 
What is it? 

669
00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:33,840
It's too windy. 
Is it really windy? 

670
00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:37,360
Yeah, with the play. 
It's great, they're gonna, it's 

671
00:28:37,360 --> 00:28:40,280
great, but it's really windy, so
it's always cold. 

672
00:28:40,560 --> 00:28:42,280
Is it always cold? 
You should go to Alcatraz. 

673
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:44,720
We want to go to Alcatraz. 
It's great. 

674
00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:47,680
But they might not let us out. 
Me and Sean Haggerty were there.

675
00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:50,480
Really, what's it like? 
A couple weeks ago I'd done 

676
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:53,760
Alcatraz before, so I just told 
him to go look right and I just 

677
00:28:53,760 --> 00:28:55,640
stayed on land. 
But he went and loved it. 

678
00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:58,200
Alcatraz to brilliant. 
Is it? 

679
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:03,520
See, when they were in Alcatraz,
they could hear if the wind was 

680
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:05,680
blown a certain direction. 
They could hear people. 

681
00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:08,680
But there was like a Boat Club 
or something that had parties 

682
00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:13,120
back like on in San Francisco 
and they could hear people 

683
00:29:13,120 --> 00:29:15,720
having the party wind because 
the the sound will come towards 

684
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:16,920
them. 
Get a that's. 

685
00:29:16,960 --> 00:29:18,840
Really far away. 
There's nothing worse than being

686
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:20,880
stuck somewhere one of, you 
know, they're having crack 

687
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:23,760
elsewhere as well. 
You'd be like sounds like 

688
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:26,600
brilliant crook. 
You don't see the tour of it. 

689
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:30,880
Unbelievable, is it? 
It's definitely the list. 

690
00:29:33,880 --> 00:29:35,120
Did you see it? 
You've been San Francisco. 

691
00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:37,520
No, it's wild, by the way. 
Is it? 

692
00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:39,760
Don't go to the Tenderloin. 
Why not? 

693
00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:42,440
Nuts, please. 
Loads of blue waffle. 

694
00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:44,880
Loads of blue waffle. 
Yeah, we're going to the 

695
00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:47,000
Tenderloin. 
No, you can't. 

696
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:48,800
You're you're you can't. 
Like especially at night, you 

697
00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:49,440
can't walk. 
Was it? 

698
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:52,320
Is it actually really dangerous?
I didn't realise I I knew. 

699
00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:53,920
All this really bad. 
Really. 

700
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:54,320
Really. 
Bad. 

701
00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:57,680
I knew all this and I'd been to 
San Francisco two or three times

702
00:29:57,680 --> 00:30:00,560
before and I still booked me 
insurance hotel on the edge of 

703
00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:02,560
it. 
And the guy when you're leaving 

704
00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:04,800
the hotel, the receptionist is 
like, have a great time, guys. 

705
00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:07,560
Just don't turn left, come out 
of the hotel, just always go 

706
00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:09,800
right 100%. 
Oh God. 

707
00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:11,800
It's insane, but you'll be 
nowhere near there. 

708
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:13,520
It's insane and I want us on the
road. 

709
00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:19,440
I think so. 
Us too, in San Francisco. 

710
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:22,040
It's going to be fun. 
What part are we staying in? 

711
00:30:22,040 --> 00:30:24,120
We're staying in the Mission 
District. 

712
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:26,560
I'm sure it'll be all right. 
I'm sure it'll be all right, but

713
00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:27,840
just a Tenderloin. 
You just don't. 

714
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:30,880
You don't go near. 
Where's the hairiest place 

715
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:34,880
outside a home you've ever been?
Like somewhere you walk. 

716
00:30:34,880 --> 00:30:39,080
Tigers Bay. 
No, because we went on that trip

717
00:30:39,080 --> 00:30:43,360
to Tijuana Manual and that's one
of the hairiest places. 

718
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:46,400
I went in the real bottle estate
in Paris did. 

719
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:49,120
You. 
Yeah, By chance you were just 

720
00:30:49,120 --> 00:30:50,280
we. 
Just dog by accident. 

721
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,960
Like walked until they state and
then started getting followed 

722
00:30:52,960 --> 00:30:54,480
and then realised that fucked 
up. 

723
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:56,200
Oh, really? 
Yeah, you did. 

724
00:30:58,560 --> 00:31:01,520
You dig it up. 
I actually what freaked me out 

725
00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:03,400
just because I had her with me, 
right? 

726
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:06,160
So I had been on my own. 
I would have been like scared, 

727
00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:09,440
but because she used with me, so
I was like, right, I said, you 

728
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:11,560
need to put your hands in your 
pocket, take all your rings off,

729
00:31:12,360 --> 00:31:14,760
fucking hate them and whatever. 
And she was like, why? 

730
00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:15,680
And I was like, because we're 
being. 

731
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:16,560
Fun. 
We're into this. 

732
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:20,600
The same fella turned up in the 
shop every couple of 100 yards 

733
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:24,240
at the front, Yeah, so whatever 
way he was going through alleys 

734
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:25,600
or whatever and then coming back
out. 

735
00:31:25,920 --> 00:31:29,440
So we were at the end. 
So the traffic got really bad 

736
00:31:29,440 --> 00:31:31,760
and I went wrong night and I 
made a run through traffic. 

737
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:35,200
So there were big and there was 
2 cops across the road. 

738
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:37,680
And I got across the road and 
the cop looked across and he 

739
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:40,080
said to us like, yeah, they were
following you. 

740
00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,040
You just were like a couple of 
streets away from being robbed. 

741
00:31:43,080 --> 00:31:44,760
Oh, don't. 
No beard. 

742
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:50,280
What about Tijuana? 
Mexico, yeah, the goal when you 

743
00:31:50,280 --> 00:31:53,240
cross the border, we were in 
some San Diego when you cross 

744
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:55,800
the border or whatever you do, 
just get in a cab and go right 

745
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:59,360
in the middle of the town. 
What I heard was there's loads 

746
00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:02,400
of things where I go be alright,
like when I got circumcised to 

747
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:06,240
go don't walk, don't do 
anything, relax for like 2 days.

748
00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:09,680
But I usually I always go to. 
Say that when I got the snap, 

749
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:11,520
doesn't listen to it. 
Yeah, I went for. 

750
00:32:11,640 --> 00:32:14,720
A5 You said fucking balls were 
swelled up and bleeding, Yeah. 

751
00:32:14,920 --> 00:32:17,160
But it is medical effect. 
Shame, huh? 

752
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:18,800
So you walked. 
You didn't. 

753
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:22,880
I just went for a walk. 
OK, Mexico is just the oh, we. 

754
00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:25,880
We walked into the town. 
Stay in the resorts. 

755
00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:29,000
And it was it, it was, it was 
fine, but you could tell how 

756
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:31,280
like this could be bad. 
Yeah. 

757
00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:33,440
And then? 
You could have died and drive by

758
00:32:33,440 --> 00:32:34,320
a cartel. 
Drive by. 

759
00:32:34,520 --> 00:32:35,200
Yeah. 
Wow. 

760
00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:38,400
I would have like. 
What a way to go that'd. 

761
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:40,000
Be quite cool. 
I would have somehow tried to 

762
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:42,040
trick Sean into it. 
I wouldn't mean that be at my 

763
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:44,240
headline. 
Like Rona Damon dies in Mexican 

764
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:46,240
cartel shootout. 
No one's dead. 

765
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:49,200
Like Broner Diamond dies from 
eating Patty McDonald's dodgy 

766
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:51,720
finger. 
Cut your head off, like leave it

767
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:53,320
by the side of the road. 
Not Yeah, you're like a. 

768
00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:59,440
Date again. 
That's what they do. 

769
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:06,600
You in a big cup? 
Yeah, deep with me now. 

770
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,000
And here I'm in Amsterdam next 
week. 

771
00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:14,320
And it was actually thinking 
about you, not the because you 

772
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:17,400
told me that you accidentally 
ate too much of that chocolate, 

773
00:33:17,400 --> 00:33:20,240
didn't you? 
And got really see I would have 

774
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:22,160
a nervous breakdown because I'm 
lightweight. 

775
00:33:23,160 --> 00:33:23,880
I was. 
Crying. 

776
00:33:23,960 --> 00:33:27,000
I was at Dead Meat last year and
I had Curry and I didn't know it

777
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:29,720
was fucking least. 
What Curry can have. 

778
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:32,440
There was a guy made Curry that 
was least and there was like all

779
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:35,280
stuff going and I didn't know 
and then I was starting to freak

780
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:37,600
out. 
But I was convinced that Andre 

781
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:41,640
Maxwell, the comedian looked 
after me all night and I sent 

782
00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:43,720
him a message and I was like 
mate, thank you very much. 

783
00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:46,480
And he was like, I was with you 
for like 2 months. 

784
00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:50,080
Really, you know he'd like 
Sherpa due through the whole 

785
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:50,960
experience. 
Sherpa. 

786
00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:54,040
Like really worried about me and
like making sure I was well 

787
00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:55,360
watered and stuff. 
What was in it? 

788
00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:59,200
You're not a plant. 
It wasn't him. 

789
00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:03,560
It wasn't him, no. 
It's probably somebody like your

790
00:34:03,560 --> 00:34:05,760
wife or. 
He says I was with him for like 

791
00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:08,800
5 months right? 
But he says you were all wasted,

792
00:34:08,800 --> 00:34:10,400
so. 
I might. 

793
00:34:10,719 --> 00:34:13,560
He lived immediately it. 
Changed my concept of time. 

794
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:17,440
So PSG were playing Barcelona 
that night and I want to watch 

795
00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:22,199
it and then maybe took the 
brownie at like 5:00 and the 

796
00:34:22,199 --> 00:34:23,760
game was at 8. 
The whole brownie. 

797
00:34:24,440 --> 00:34:27,199
Yeah, right. 
Again, the went don't eat the 

798
00:34:27,199 --> 00:34:29,440
whole thing, but I'm going to 
have to say that. 

799
00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:32,159
Be grand. 
I just, I have a wee touch of 

800
00:34:32,159 --> 00:34:34,000
that. 
To eat 1/4 of it at most. 

801
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:35,440
And I went, I know what you're 
saying. 

802
00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:36,960
They're like, no, no, just eat 
a. 

803
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:41,320
Quarter of it I said OK. 
And I made the mistake of. 

804
00:34:41,520 --> 00:34:44,800
I took like a little bit of it 
and then nothing happened. 

805
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:47,239
I was like, this isn't working. 
I've been 4 minutes. 

806
00:34:47,239 --> 00:34:50,080
We're for Wall Street and I. 
And then it goes immediately 

807
00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:52,040
from this isn't working to call 
me an ambulance place. 

808
00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:55,560
Well, I thought when I got back 
to hotel I turned on TV and the 

809
00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:58,320
match was on, but I thought 
loads of time had passed but it 

810
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:00,640
had been like like 2 hours since
I've taken a brony. 

811
00:35:01,240 --> 00:35:03,960
I thought it was like 3 or 4 in 
the morning and I couldn't work 

812
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,360
out why they were playing the 
game at that time of night. 

813
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:09,440
And I thought there had been a 
terrorist attack in in 

814
00:35:10,080 --> 00:35:12,400
Barcelona. 
So that held the game up and I 

815
00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:13,960
started thinking of like, 
everyone who could have been 

816
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:15,160
affected by it, and I started 
crying. 

817
00:35:17,720 --> 00:35:20,360
You went to there was a 
terrorist attack, so they only 

818
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:22,320
postponed the football. 
Game yeah, I was like, they've 

819
00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:23,960
had to play this in the middle 
of night and I was thinking 

820
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:25,960
about the players as well-being 
like they'll be so tired like 

821
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:28,080
the next day and it made me 
real, it made me like. 

822
00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:30,240
Really emotional. 
Yeah, full tears. 

823
00:35:30,240 --> 00:35:30,840
Amazing all. 
Stop. 

824
00:35:31,720 --> 00:35:33,400
It was like why is this? 
Game on this time in the 

825
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:37,320
morning. 
And but for this beer golf thing

826
00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:40,840
that we're doing, I was going to
it's going to maybe double 

827
00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:42,040
again. 
What be golf thing? 

828
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:45,720
We're doing like a. 
You didn't get invaded because 

829
00:35:45,720 --> 00:35:49,280
you're. 
A woman and I can be. 

830
00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:51,600
Sober. 
Oh, was it a drinky thing? 

831
00:35:51,640 --> 00:35:52,400
Yes. 
Right. 

832
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:56,120
OK, yes. 
Unless you want to jump back off

833
00:35:56,120 --> 00:35:58,760
the waggon, follow just. 
To take a fucking Pavlova. 

834
00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:03,840
Did somebody say viral clips? 
You can make a blue waffle. 

835
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:09,120
You know, don't tempt me. 
Bruno is serving a trademark 

836
00:36:09,120 --> 00:36:10,080
blue waffle. 
Yeah. 

837
00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:15,440
Very. 
Very good, like nothing of. 

838
00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:19,720
Greg Wallace, Like, let's go. 
See, if I was still on the 

839
00:36:19,720 --> 00:36:21,480
drink, I probably would have a 
blue waffle. 

840
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:28,800
I joke. 
Still a virgin. 

841
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:32,080
What are you talking about 
anyways? 

842
00:36:32,720 --> 00:36:37,320
Yeah, land, guys. 
I love you being an A A like I 

843
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:39,280
had to give it up. 
Like, yeah, yeah, because it 

844
00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:40,920
was. 
Headed the blue waffle way. 

845
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:43,040
Yeah, it was. 
The Mana Crusty Muff. 

846
00:36:43,040 --> 00:36:46,880
Couldn't walk crusty. 
Muff crusty muff actually sounds

847
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:50,320
like a barn banger Does does a 
crusty muff crusty muff? 

848
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:54,080
Sounds like a sandwich that you 
can get one of those specialist 

849
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:56,120
bakeries. 
All these mad bars. 

850
00:36:56,280 --> 00:36:57,400
The Crusty Muff. 
Yeah. 

851
00:36:57,520 --> 00:36:58,920
Where you playing tonight? 
Crusty Muff. 

852
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:01,840
Yeah, people thought like, you 
know, she's walking funny. 

853
00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:03,320
She must be black now. 
Just. 

854
00:37:05,080 --> 00:37:07,320
If you had to live in another 
city in the world, where would 

855
00:37:07,320 --> 00:37:09,640
you live? 
Oh, Derry. 

856
00:37:10,280 --> 00:37:12,760
Really. 
Actually, I love Derry. 

857
00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:14,280
Yeah. 
I actually thought that I was 

858
00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:18,640
going to end up living in Derry 
and then had my wee son and I 

859
00:37:18,640 --> 00:37:20,440
just thought, well, I can't do 
that now. 

860
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:24,560
But because, I don't know, it 
was kind of like stuck. 

861
00:37:24,880 --> 00:37:26,440
But then again, I should have 
just fucking moved to Derry 

862
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:28,640
because it's not like if anybody
helps me down here anyway. 

863
00:37:29,040 --> 00:37:30,880
People of such a mad thing to 
say. 

864
00:37:32,160 --> 00:37:35,080
You'll miss me when I'm dead. 
I could have moved to New Delhi.

865
00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:39,080
New Delhi, but yeah, Derry, I 
just love it as a city. 

866
00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:43,920
I I know that's not very 
adventurous, but people are 

867
00:37:43,920 --> 00:37:46,640
friendly. 
There's a real outgoing sort of 

868
00:37:46,720 --> 00:37:47,960
vibe. 
There are people that are very 

869
00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:49,960
good theatre going community in 
Derry. 

870
00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:53,880
People are more I love you know,
they all are so interested in 

871
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:58,760
like going out and doing culture
things rather than just. 

872
00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:00,880
One of my favourite clothing 
brands, Storefront. 

873
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:03,720
Storefront Dairy. 
Dairy What? 

874
00:38:03,720 --> 00:38:07,960
Are they still? 
Street wear hoodies, T-shirts, 

875
00:38:07,960 --> 00:38:10,840
jumpers, the brilliant and if. 
You put in T with me, you get 

876
00:38:10,840 --> 00:38:13,360
10% off, Yeah. 
I know where party would live. 

877
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:14,480
You had live in different. 
Where would you? 

878
00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:16,080
Where would he live? 
No, actually no, I've changed 

879
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:17,600
your mind. 
What is it? 

880
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:20,480
He would go back to America and 
he'd live in. 

881
00:38:20,640 --> 00:38:28,440
No, he live in, can live in. 
You're like a bad medium here, 

882
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:31,080
you know? 
It's like I'm getting on John 

883
00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:32,960
GM. 
Portugal. 

884
00:38:33,240 --> 00:38:34,680
No. 
I've never been to Portugal. 

885
00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:36,080
Have you not been to Portugal? 
Never. 

886
00:38:36,080 --> 00:38:37,440
Somewhere in Europe. 
No. 

887
00:38:38,240 --> 00:38:39,480
North America. 
No. 

888
00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:41,360
Australia. 
London, Australia. 

889
00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:43,080
Australia loves it. 
He loves it. 

890
00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:44,520
We do. 
You live in Perth from 

891
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:46,400
Australia. 
Why? 

892
00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:47,840
Paddy McDonald, Crocodile 
Hunter. 

893
00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:49,520
He wants to be the new Steve 
Orwin. 

894
00:38:49,520 --> 00:38:51,160
Can you imagine that? 
Can you tell the fucking 

895
00:38:51,160 --> 00:38:52,880
glasses? 
You want to see my bagger? 

896
00:38:59,240 --> 00:39:02,120
But no, I really like Australian
was our Yeah, I just think it's 

897
00:39:02,120 --> 00:39:03,720
fantastic. 
What I watch was like people 

898
00:39:03,720 --> 00:39:06,280
that know that Sir and have 
their kids kids get up, go to 

899
00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:08,440
school and come back and go 
surfing on the beach and all. 

900
00:39:08,440 --> 00:39:10,000
I'm just like. 
And you love to get into the 

901
00:39:10,000 --> 00:39:11,800
Bush. 
What a what a fuck a life. 

902
00:39:12,080 --> 00:39:14,760
Blue waffle Bush. 
Yeah, that. 

903
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:17,040
Sounds like a species of snakes 
Steve Orman would have been 

904
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:18,200
hunting. 
Look, here's one. 

905
00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:23,720
Here a blue waffle. 
I love Steve Orton RIP that hit 

906
00:39:23,720 --> 00:39:25,720
me hard. 
I remember when he died I was 

907
00:39:25,720 --> 00:39:28,680
working at Mac and Ennies. 
I think you're actually on. 

908
00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:30,720
Do you not remember where you 
were, Patty? 

909
00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:35,440
Do you know, out of all the 
celebrities, there's two 

910
00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:37,480
celebrities? 
And I remember exactly where I 

911
00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:39,880
was when they died. 
Hey, Michael Jackson. 

912
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:42,320
Where were you? 
I was in the house and I was 

913
00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:45,240
sitting on the fucking seat and 
I fucking threw my phone across 

914
00:39:45,240 --> 00:39:46,600
the room. 
Fuck Michael Jackson. 

915
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:48,200
Fucking died. 
Holy fuck did he owe you money? 

916
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:57,160
Yeah, Smooth Criminal and and 
the other one was back the black

917
00:39:57,160 --> 00:39:59,200
singer. 
Amy Winehouse Amy Winehouse 

918
00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:02,040
Where were even black? 
Taxis, it was in the boogies and

919
00:40:02,040 --> 00:40:04,200
I says Amy Winehouse just died 
in the garden of boogies. 

920
00:40:04,200 --> 00:40:06,080
She's like, don't fucking do. 
Yes, you're a wanker. 

921
00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:08,640
You always do stuff like us now,
but no one's like facing the 

922
00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:10,480
taxi rank. 
I says Amy Winehouse just been 

923
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:13,360
found dead literally there and 
she's like, you're full of shit.

924
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:15,960
And the girl ended up fucking 
crying when she found out it was

925
00:40:15,960 --> 00:40:17,400
true. 
Why do people cry whenever 

926
00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:19,840
celebrities die then? 
Because they feel like the 

927
00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:21,280
noodle. 
Supposed to do. 

928
00:40:21,440 --> 00:40:26,560
I I was on stage at Glasgowbury 
outside Derry, in between Derry,

929
00:40:26,560 --> 00:40:28,240
Limavady, where that is and then
the. 

930
00:40:28,240 --> 00:40:30,400
Sperm Mountains. 
Yep. 

931
00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:34,240
So why I announced it? 
As soon as I was about to walk 

932
00:40:34,240 --> 00:40:35,760
on stage, I was like Amy 
Winehouse dead. 

933
00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:38,920
So I just walked on and went, 
folks. 

934
00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:42,560
Amy Winehouse just died. 
But anyway, my dad's a bit of a 

935
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:44,680
crazy character. 
Everyone straight away just got 

936
00:40:44,680 --> 00:40:46,400
their phone out. 
The whole audience got their 

937
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:47,560
phone. 
Out and was looking. 

938
00:40:47,560 --> 00:40:49,720
And texting people so I lost the
room. 

939
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:51,720
You have to. 
Yeah, absolutely. 

940
00:40:51,720 --> 00:40:54,800
So her death. 
Rude ruined your gig. 

941
00:40:55,120 --> 00:40:57,680
Ruined her death, ruined my 
show. 

942
00:40:57,720 --> 00:40:59,040
Totally. 
Ruined. 

943
00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:00,880
Never forget. 
Yeah, I. 

944
00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:03,360
I thought she was great. 
Yeah, she was great. 

945
00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:07,200
I remember watching about two 
weeks before she died. 

946
00:41:07,880 --> 00:41:10,200
I saw her, she was on stage and 
whoever pooed. 

947
00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:12,760
I only saw her two weeks ago. 
I saw her two weeks ago. 

948
00:41:12,760 --> 00:41:14,840
No, I remember looking at her on
stage and going that girl's 

949
00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:18,240
gonna die soon. 
Oh, she was on the she was going

950
00:41:18,240 --> 00:41:20,960
5050 there for a while. 
Yeah, the old heroin. 

951
00:41:20,960 --> 00:41:23,160
She'd have went to RE. 
No, but apparently she died 

952
00:41:23,160 --> 00:41:26,680
because she was them having 
fingers for dessert. 

953
00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:29,920
She was bulimic. 
Oh, right, right, right. 

954
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:32,760
Yeah, she was bulimic. 
So you meant Cadbury's? 

955
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:34,280
I was like, no problem, no 
problem there. 

956
00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:35,360
Good. 
To say I haven't heard of 

957
00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:36,640
fingers either. 
What the fuck is? 

958
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:38,200
That there's a guy I bit your 
finger off. 

959
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:40,160
He had bulimia as. 
Well, do you know funny stories?

960
00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:42,200
See, when I they get my finger 
bit off and everybody came to 

961
00:41:42,200 --> 00:41:45,520
see me in the Ulster Hospital. 
Every brought everybody without 

962
00:41:45,520 --> 00:41:48,440
realising what they've done, 
brought me in their chocolate 

963
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:50,440
fingers, coconut fingers. 
They. 

964
00:41:50,560 --> 00:41:52,080
Didn't really. 
Support the fuck? 

965
00:41:52,520 --> 00:41:54,960
It was like, it's definitely a 
subconscious thing where you're 

966
00:41:54,960 --> 00:41:58,360
like, yes. 
Were were in Australia that you 

967
00:41:58,360 --> 00:42:00,040
went would you move to 
Melbourne? 

968
00:42:00,440 --> 00:42:03,760
Perth person we built more like 
homeless because not a big 

969
00:42:03,760 --> 00:42:04,920
massive city. 
What? 

970
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:06,920
There were powerholes in the 
streets every night. 

971
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:11,800
It was spotless, spotless and it
was like a mini taxes Dallas 

972
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:15,160
field to it was plenty of money 
in it and I just. 

973
00:42:15,160 --> 00:42:16,600
You planning on moving there or 
robbing it? 

974
00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:22,840
When I get there, but I just 
loved the whole feel of it and. 

975
00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:25,360
It's a very relaxed way of life.
I would bring kids up here. 

976
00:42:25,360 --> 00:42:28,160
It had like a country feel, only
it was a big city. 

977
00:42:28,240 --> 00:42:29,760
Yep. 
Do you want to know something 

978
00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:32,120
that sounds a bit drab? 
I love weather though. 

979
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:34,680
Like, as much as I love the 
summer. 

980
00:42:35,280 --> 00:42:37,520
You want a bit of rain. 
Then again, you know when if you

981
00:42:37,520 --> 00:42:39,760
want to listen to some 
atmospheric music and feel sorry

982
00:42:39,760 --> 00:42:41,080
for yourself, you want a bit of 
rain. 

983
00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:44,480
In the shower every morning. 
No, but like you know, I love 

984
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:46,880
whenever drencher you know what 
autumn or like in the winter 

985
00:42:46,880 --> 00:42:48,840
when it's freezing and you get 
in your whack A heap. 

986
00:42:48,840 --> 00:42:49,720
I've. 
Not got a dresser? 

987
00:42:49,720 --> 00:42:53,160
Party, stop asking her. 
Sounds dirty party, yeah. 

988
00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:55,320
When you four times in a second.
Seriously. 

989
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:57,640
Have you got a drencher, bro? 
Have you got a drencher? 

990
00:42:57,640 --> 00:42:59,720
Show me your dagger and I'll 
tell you I've got a drencher. 

991
00:43:00,000 --> 00:43:01,680
And I'll show you my drencher. 
A transfer. 

992
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:06,760
A transfer for a dagger. 
Yeah, we're wrong, Pete. 

993
00:43:06,760 --> 00:43:09,840
We're not well. 
I I can totally see it. 

994
00:43:10,280 --> 00:43:12,640
Yeah. 
And I understand why young 

995
00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:15,040
people do have a drencher. 
Do you? 

996
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:16,520
Is that the big round one above 
you? 

997
00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:20,880
I have a small drencher. 
OK, and I give yourself a bit. 

998
00:43:20,880 --> 00:43:22,280
Of but the drenchers, you've 
done it but it. 

999
00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:25,080
It it's powerful. 
Does it small boyfriend you can 

1000
00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:26,840
put the sounds on and they 
understand. 

1001
00:43:26,840 --> 00:43:29,080
On do you have? 
AI don't have almost sounds. 

1002
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:30,840
No, like in the Gal gorm you 
can. 

1003
00:43:30,840 --> 00:43:32,320
Put it on your phone. 
Oh. 

1004
00:43:33,080 --> 00:43:35,040
Tunes like. 
You can put like it sounds of 

1005
00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:37,080
the forest or fucking. 
And I hang on, when you go to 

1006
00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:39,040
the Gal Gorn, you can go in and 
there's this week thing in a 

1007
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:40,680
place Thunder sounds and. 
All. 

1008
00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:42,480
Salt in your. 
Feet salt from the Gal Gorn. 

1009
00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:46,080
Yeah, shaped. 
Paddy, you've changed man. 

1010
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:47,800
You want to go. 
To I have a. 

1011
00:43:48,080 --> 00:43:50,120
Room in the Gal Gorn. 
Want to live in Perth? 

1012
00:43:50,120 --> 00:43:52,080
Fucking real quiet place. 
No 100%. 

1013
00:43:52,680 --> 00:43:56,360
But I I can, since I went there 
a couple of times, I can see why

1014
00:43:56,720 --> 00:43:59,760
young people from here go 
because I didn't get it. 

1015
00:44:00,120 --> 00:44:02,040
That's the crack with them, but 
they're like, you can't go if 

1016
00:44:02,040 --> 00:44:03,640
you have a terminal. 
Record. 

1017
00:44:03,920 --> 00:44:06,200
Used to be you only got fucking 
centre if you had a criminal 

1018
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:08,240
record. 
You got centre as a punishment. 

1019
00:44:08,360 --> 00:44:10,800
I was only getting arrested 
because I wanted to get in. 

1020
00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:12,680
Yeah, like what's going to build
up my point? 

1021
00:44:12,840 --> 00:44:15,360
That's right. 
Back in the day, Grand Belt, 

1022
00:44:15,360 --> 00:44:17,840
there was no food. 
You've just fucking stole a loaf

1023
00:44:17,840 --> 00:44:21,640
and you're like lifted. 
And they're like, listen, we're 

1024
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:24,800
going to send you to Australia 
and you're raved in Australia. 

1025
00:44:25,040 --> 00:44:27,800
I love holiday. 
And pretend not to be buzzing. 

1026
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:29,320
You're like I said, shit. 
Yeah. 

1027
00:44:32,640 --> 00:44:34,400
Where'd your brother go from the
road? 

1028
00:44:39,560 --> 00:44:42,040
Freezing here. 
Babe, what do you mean? 

1029
00:44:42,080 --> 00:44:44,040
Yeah. 
Weather is here, wish you. 

1030
00:44:44,040 --> 00:44:44,760
Were lovely. 
Oh. 

1031
00:44:44,920 --> 00:44:47,120
Man, on that grey hood burns the
bird there. 

1032
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:49,000
We fuck another grey hood. 
Stomach. 

1033
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:52,960
A grey hood. 
So my tummy's rumbling. 

1034
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:55,160
I should have eaten. 
Do you know what you call that 

1035
00:44:55,160 --> 00:44:56,280
sound? 
Borber rig me. 

1036
00:44:57,400 --> 00:44:58,640
What? 
Borber rig me. 

1037
00:44:59,120 --> 00:45:00,560
What's? 
That's what you call the sound 

1038
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:03,360
that your Tommy makes whenever. 
Borg me Yeah, sounds like 

1039
00:45:03,360 --> 00:45:04,280
someone would have been a Mac 
and. 

1040
00:45:04,280 --> 00:45:06,400
Any. 
I always think it's Borg me. 

1041
00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:10,640
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 
Can I tell you no one else has 

1042
00:45:10,760 --> 00:45:12,640
ever thought that in history? 
Yeah. 

1043
00:45:12,800 --> 00:45:15,760
I know, but my my podcast called
word up so I think of we I like 

1044
00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:19,520
weird words and phrases. 
But yes, the Borg me hanging out

1045
00:45:19,520 --> 00:45:20,720
of me here. 
Any new words at? 

1046
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:24,120
The minute. 
What was the word the other day?

1047
00:45:24,960 --> 00:45:28,160
So ersatz will have the ersatz. 
Ersatz is like whenever you get 

1048
00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:29,880
a shit version or something, 
right? 

1049
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:33,360
So do you know the way you get 
like, umm, some people have Naik

1050
00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:36,040
and then some people will get 
like nabes from Timo. 

1051
00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:39,000
Do you know what I mean? 
So ersatz is like a second hand 

1052
00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:41,920
version or something. 
You know, like you can go. 

1053
00:45:41,920 --> 00:45:45,440
Using a sentence. 
So, right, so you could say that

1054
00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:48,840
like Maxwell Houses are Sats, 
you know. 

1055
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:50,520
Doesn't sound right. 
Nest Cafe. 

1056
00:45:51,920 --> 00:45:56,280
Do you think? 
How do you spell ERZITZ? 

1057
00:45:57,200 --> 00:46:00,440
Yeah. 
Or is it SATZ ersatz? 

1058
00:46:00,920 --> 00:46:02,200
So you'll say like you're 
somebody. 

1059
00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:04,440
'S like in was an ersatz. 
Do you know the way we'll go? 

1060
00:46:04,440 --> 00:46:08,200
Like they're fucking Teamu 
portion backs, do you know what 

1061
00:46:08,200 --> 00:46:09,520
I mean? 
So it's like the ersatz. 

1062
00:46:09,520 --> 00:46:11,840
The lesser version of something 
is the ersatz. 

1063
00:46:11,840 --> 00:46:14,360
I can't take anything else in 
like that's not making its way 

1064
00:46:14,360 --> 00:46:16,440
into my brain. 
I was thinking about any blue 

1065
00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:17,520
there. 
When you said I'm not taking 

1066
00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:18,920
anything else, then I was like 
she. 

1067
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:22,600
Needs There's another 788 to go.
Yeah, Oh my God, Can you imagine

1068
00:46:22,760 --> 00:46:25,040
Jesus Christ? 
I am you. 

1069
00:46:25,040 --> 00:46:27,840
Wouldn't be bothered. 
Gigging in Australia is the 

1070
00:46:27,840 --> 00:46:28,680
best. 
Is it? 

1071
00:46:28,680 --> 00:46:29,360
Oh, it's unreal. 
It's. 

1072
00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:33,440
The best I would like to gig in 
Australia I shall go down under.

1073
00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:36,160
Should we be far? 
Wasn't it Kelly Irish? 

1074
00:46:36,560 --> 00:46:38,240
Yes. 
That's a good story. 

1075
00:46:38,920 --> 00:46:41,640
Heath Ledger is in a movie about
him, isn't it? 

1076
00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:44,040
It's really good. 
It is a good story. 

1077
00:46:44,120 --> 00:46:46,240
Yeah. 
Ned Kelly, All the best 

1078
00:46:46,240 --> 00:46:51,160
criminals were Irish over there.
You know I I wanna do a series 

1079
00:46:51,520 --> 00:46:54,040
where I. 
Just a pitch. 

1080
00:46:54,200 --> 00:46:59,680
Tell the story, yes, of people 
that you didn't know were Irish.

1081
00:47:00,600 --> 00:47:03,400
Right. 
But were and you go on explore 

1082
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:04,000
the. 
Story. 

1083
00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:06,120
Barack Obama. 
Yeah. 

1084
00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:12,520
Wait, no, not that you didn't 
know, but you might not know 

1085
00:47:12,560 --> 00:47:15,400
what they did. 
The man that invented the 

1086
00:47:15,440 --> 00:47:17,800
immersion heater was Irish. 
Of course he was. 

1087
00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:20,160
Put him on the standby list of 
people were doom. 

1088
00:47:20,160 --> 00:47:22,440
The man that invented the 
submarine was Irish, was he? 

1089
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:25,440
Who's the guy? 
The man that invented the modern

1090
00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:31,160
tattoo gun was Irish. 
Who was the guy that was manager

1091
00:47:31,160 --> 00:47:32,880
Barcelona? 
Patrick. 

1092
00:47:34,120 --> 00:47:38,080
Patrick called him Patricio, but
it was Patrick something. 

1093
00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:40,240
Did you see that guy in French 
speaking in French? 

1094
00:47:40,240 --> 00:47:42,120
He actually. 
Not only did he manage them, he 

1095
00:47:42,120 --> 00:47:45,080
saved them. 
Yes, O'Connell, O'Connell, 

1096
00:47:45,240 --> 00:47:48,360
Patrick O'Connell he saved. 
That episode 1. 

1097
00:47:49,240 --> 00:47:51,880
Right, there you go. 
I want to do one on Hercules 

1098
00:47:51,880 --> 00:47:53,520
Mulligan. 
Who's that? 

1099
00:47:54,080 --> 00:47:57,760
He's from Korean and he went 
over to America and he was one 

1100
00:47:57,760 --> 00:47:59,800
the one like the founder fathers
of America. 

1101
00:48:00,040 --> 00:48:01,240
Hercules. 
He was. 

1102
00:48:01,320 --> 00:48:03,120
He's from Coleraine. 
He was called Hercules. 

1103
00:48:03,120 --> 00:48:03,880
Hercules. 
But. 

1104
00:48:04,080 --> 00:48:07,600
His dad, he may be definitely 
eating a special mushrooms, a 

1105
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:09,560
green face. 
He maybe changed it when he got 

1106
00:48:09,560 --> 00:48:11,000
there to sound cooler. 
We heard it. 

1107
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:12,840
Being like, I bet his name was 
like Henry. 

1108
00:48:13,000 --> 00:48:13,760
Yeah. 
Brian. 

1109
00:48:13,920 --> 00:48:15,440
Henry. 
Mormon Mccatchet. 

1110
00:48:15,640 --> 00:48:22,480
He he was he spied on British 
troops during the the war in 

1111
00:48:22,480 --> 00:48:24,080
America. 
The root goods are coming. 

1112
00:48:24,080 --> 00:48:27,800
Oh, so was he a big thing when 
it came to the this simple? 

1113
00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:30,360
You know the play, Hamilton, 
Yes, He's like a big part of it.

1114
00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:31,480
Oh, is he? 
Children. 

1115
00:48:32,000 --> 00:48:33,720
Yeah, he's in that too. 
What films? 

1116
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:34,960
Patriot. 
What's that? 

1117
00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:36,520
Heath. 
Ledger. 

1118
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:38,920
Once again and Mel Gibson. 
And the fight against the 

1119
00:48:38,920 --> 00:48:42,120
British Germans in that. 
I'm reading about the American 

1120
00:48:42,120 --> 00:48:44,600
Civil War. 
Are you What's the best, What's 

1121
00:48:44,600 --> 00:48:46,000
the most interesting thing 
you've read recently? 

1122
00:48:46,320 --> 00:48:47,680
See, here's the thing with me in
books. 

1123
00:48:47,720 --> 00:48:51,080
I enjoy them at the time as I'm 
reading it, but then I don't 

1124
00:48:51,080 --> 00:48:53,240
retain anything. 
But I am at the time. 

1125
00:48:53,520 --> 00:48:55,520
Yeah. 
Umm, but it was. 

1126
00:48:55,520 --> 00:48:59,760
Like get it invented the the 
water system that brought water 

1127
00:48:59,760 --> 00:49:02,640
to LA was Irish as well. 
I knew that because Patrick, 

1128
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:05,880
he's documentary. 
And umm, yeah, so he was. 

1129
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:08,800
And then he just, he'd done 
something where he'd done some 

1130
00:49:08,800 --> 00:49:11,280
dodgy work or some dodgy thing 
and then, well, clearly they 

1131
00:49:11,280 --> 00:49:12,360
don't talk. 
It would have to be. 

1132
00:49:12,360 --> 00:49:14,560
That he didn't come back again 
when the tarmac was falling off.

1133
00:49:14,560 --> 00:49:17,880
He brought he brought water to 
LA, Yeah, which is going to be 

1134
00:49:17,880 --> 00:49:20,640
the next war in the. 
World, What the hell am I? 

1135
00:49:23,840 --> 00:49:27,080
We are lost in like water, so 
there's like not enough water to

1136
00:49:27,080 --> 00:49:28,520
go a bit. 
In LA. 

1137
00:49:28,720 --> 00:49:30,720
But the sea? 
They have those big air. 

1138
00:49:31,160 --> 00:49:33,720
What about it? 
Would you boil up? 

1139
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:37,040
Not at once. 
There's salt in it. 

1140
00:49:37,080 --> 00:49:39,960
But we could boil it like take a
wee bit. 

1141
00:49:39,960 --> 00:49:41,080
There's a load of water in the 
sea. 

1142
00:49:41,080 --> 00:49:42,360
You're. 
Starting to see things like now 

1143
00:49:42,360 --> 00:49:44,520
like green on that. 
They're trying to fucking take 

1144
00:49:44,520 --> 00:49:46,400
that because of the minerals and
stuff like that. 

1145
00:49:46,520 --> 00:49:49,400
Yep, and the one candidate for 
minerals as well. 

1146
00:49:49,520 --> 00:49:52,120
It always fascinates me that a 
slam is green and Greenland. 

1147
00:49:52,120 --> 00:49:54,160
Is going to be the next thing. 
That's what I'm saying. 

1148
00:49:54,200 --> 00:49:56,400
So they're starting to go in now
about minerals and stuff like 

1149
00:49:56,400 --> 00:49:58,480
that, but they expect things 
going to be water. 

1150
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:01,480
Have a thought about this rain? 
Yeah. 

1151
00:50:02,280 --> 00:50:05,400
Pocket. 
Catch rain water. 

1152
00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:06,880
Yeah. 
No, we're, we're going to be OK.

1153
00:50:07,240 --> 00:50:10,920
All right, who isn't Greenland? 
No. 

1154
00:50:10,920 --> 00:50:13,360
Well, I think they'd be OK to. 
Oh, places where it doesn't 

1155
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:15,000
rain, Yeah. 
Oh yeah. 

1156
00:50:16,160 --> 00:50:18,240
So it'll be a commodity like 
there is going. 

1157
00:50:18,240 --> 00:50:21,440
To be so we can make a few. 
Well, have you see of all them 

1158
00:50:21,440 --> 00:50:22,920
Folk and Haylon spring bottles 
up? 

1159
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:27,880
We sell Yeah water because 
people are trying to buy well 

1160
00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:31,040
wells on them and it will happen
on a well. 

1161
00:50:32,240 --> 00:50:34,080
I'm just sitting here going to 
my plane just crash. 

1162
00:50:34,360 --> 00:50:35,640
No, but what? 
Are we talking? 

1163
00:50:35,640 --> 00:50:38,040
About right, I've heard of that.
Like water war and all. 

1164
00:50:38,720 --> 00:50:40,480
And people just take. 
It what is the new oil because. 

1165
00:50:40,480 --> 00:50:42,880
We can just go in and turn it 
on, do you know what I mean? 

1166
00:50:42,920 --> 00:50:45,080
But it is going to be another 
thing that there be war over, 

1167
00:50:45,080 --> 00:50:47,680
Like is the fate over oil and 
the fate over all them other 

1168
00:50:47,680 --> 00:50:49,240
things. 
Another great movie, Water 

1169
00:50:49,240 --> 00:50:52,960
World. 
Yeah, it's all about water. 

1170
00:50:53,360 --> 00:50:55,360
Kevin Costner I love. 
Kevin, it is brilliant movie, 

1171
00:50:55,360 --> 00:50:56,320
but isn't it? 
He's sexy. 

1172
00:50:56,640 --> 00:50:58,360
He is sexy, OK, like a better 
Kevin. 

1173
00:50:58,360 --> 00:50:59,000
Costner. 
No. 

1174
00:50:59,040 --> 00:51:00,480
Have you seen him in Yellowstone
these days? 

1175
00:51:00,520 --> 00:51:03,160
I watched, I started watching 
Yellowstone. 

1176
00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:05,880
He is, He's hot. 
He is a bit hot. 

1177
00:51:06,280 --> 00:51:08,880
He'd be my, I think. 
I think Yellowstone has brought 

1178
00:51:08,880 --> 00:51:11,240
back women wanting men's men 
again. 

1179
00:51:12,120 --> 00:51:13,880
Women always want men's men. 
No, they haven't. 

1180
00:51:14,360 --> 00:51:16,880
Rugged men like yourself. 
Yes, because it changed for a 

1181
00:51:16,880 --> 00:51:20,120
way like women were into the 
fucking real, like eyebrows done

1182
00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:22,000
and all that. 
No, and then I women are women 

1183
00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:24,240
aren't back at no Yellowstone 
fucking horse. 

1184
00:51:24,240 --> 00:51:25,440
Right. 
Where do you sit here? 

1185
00:51:27,320 --> 00:51:34,000
On the I don't want a man who 
spends more time on his personal

1186
00:51:34,000 --> 00:51:36,640
care routing than I do. 
Do you know what I mean? 

1187
00:51:36,840 --> 00:51:41,280
Like look well make sure like 
the manscaped thing, make sure 

1188
00:51:41,280 --> 00:51:45,440
your man skipped right. 
Do not expect me to do that and 

1189
00:51:45,440 --> 00:51:46,360
you don't do it. 
What? 

1190
00:51:46,440 --> 00:51:47,880
All right. 
I thought you were like, I'll 

1191
00:51:47,880 --> 00:51:50,000
not be doing it, but you do it. 
No, no, no. 

1192
00:51:50,000 --> 00:51:52,480
Don't we do that? 
Well, I do it for me basically. 

1193
00:51:52,480 --> 00:51:54,640
But yes, you know, you can have 
whatever you want in there. 

1194
00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:59,680
Just don't expect me to like it.
But I don't like all this too 

1195
00:51:59,680 --> 00:52:01,520
preppy. 
That's just me. 

1196
00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:03,720
I don't like if they're putting 
makeup on. 

1197
00:52:03,720 --> 00:52:06,200
And that's fine if you if you 
aren't trying to attract a 

1198
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:08,560
woman. 
But if I'm wearing makeup and 

1199
00:52:08,560 --> 00:52:10,760
you're wearing makeup, it's not 
going to wear makeup. 

1200
00:52:10,920 --> 00:52:13,120
It's not going to what's. 
Feeling paranoid now? 

1201
00:52:13,360 --> 00:52:14,720
I don't. 
I just don't. 

1202
00:52:14,720 --> 00:52:15,960
Remember, beers can't wear 
makeup. 

1203
00:52:15,960 --> 00:52:19,520
You can see it. 
So you mean that's why I don't 

1204
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:22,800
know beard? 
So you mean there's a there's a 

1205
00:52:22,960 --> 00:52:25,040
balance there? 
There's a good but you need to 

1206
00:52:25,040 --> 00:52:26,960
look after yourself. 
Good personal hygiene. 

1207
00:52:26,960 --> 00:52:29,400
Take a bit of pride in the way 
you look, but you see whenever 

1208
00:52:29,400 --> 00:52:32,240
they're like going to the 
barbers and I saw this guy 

1209
00:52:32,240 --> 00:52:33,600
sitting. 
I took my kids. 

1210
00:52:33,800 --> 00:52:36,880
That's one place I don't really 
feel like women belong is the 

1211
00:52:36,880 --> 00:52:38,440
barbers. 
Men are tickled to their we 

1212
00:52:38,440 --> 00:52:41,160
spaces too, but I felt like I 
was. 

1213
00:52:41,240 --> 00:52:42,560
What we spaces? 
Are we allowed? 

1214
00:52:42,600 --> 00:52:43,600
Imposing the. 
Barbers. 

1215
00:52:43,640 --> 00:52:46,760
Oh, the barbers were there. 
And this guy was the bookies and

1216
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:48,560
the barbers. 
There's a guy sitting there. 

1217
00:52:48,560 --> 00:52:50,120
What else do you want? 
What else you want and? 

1218
00:52:50,200 --> 00:52:56,680
He box in his hand right, and he
was looking dead sort of shifty 

1219
00:52:56,680 --> 00:53:00,400
and I was like, I'm not I feel 
like I'm maybe not supposed to 

1220
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:04,040
see something here and he palmed
the wee box off like and he 

1221
00:53:04,040 --> 00:53:06,360
loved himself. 
He was in some good shape. 

1222
00:53:06,640 --> 00:53:08,200
It was a dive. 
He was getting as beard and as 

1223
00:53:08,200 --> 00:53:11,800
her died, like the whole thing 
died and all those wee waxy 

1224
00:53:11,800 --> 00:53:16,120
things up their nose and get you
know, and I thought, Ah, I'm not

1225
00:53:16,120 --> 00:53:19,640
supposed to be here, but also 
down your beard, dude, Why? 

1226
00:53:20,000 --> 00:53:21,360
Yeah. 
You know. 

1227
00:53:21,520 --> 00:53:22,840
I was. 
This is natural. 

1228
00:53:23,240 --> 00:53:25,480
I would I would dynamite because
it's gender. 

1229
00:53:26,400 --> 00:53:28,920
You don't need to though. 
I know, but I don't like the 

1230
00:53:28,920 --> 00:53:30,960
colour of it. 
I like a beard, but. 

1231
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:33,200
The grey is coming through and I
that's, that's the look. 

1232
00:53:33,560 --> 00:53:35,200
That's the look. 
That's what I'm waiting on. 

1233
00:53:35,360 --> 00:53:38,160
That's what I'm like, Yes. 
The grey beard, yeah. 

1234
00:53:39,080 --> 00:53:39,920
I know. 
Oh, my God. 

1235
00:53:39,920 --> 00:53:41,200
Paddy. 
Yeah. 

1236
00:53:41,200 --> 00:53:42,440
You were born to have a grey 
beard. 

1237
00:53:42,440 --> 00:53:45,120
Actually, I don't know what 
happened to me there. 

1238
00:53:48,120 --> 00:53:52,400
I like, I mean, I, I don't 
think, I don't know, I like the 

1239
00:53:52,440 --> 00:53:54,000
idea of great. 
I do have great hair. 

1240
00:53:54,000 --> 00:53:55,720
Can you grow a beard? 
Nah. 

1241
00:53:55,880 --> 00:53:57,840
You don't look like they can 
grow 1. 

1242
00:53:58,120 --> 00:54:01,920
Like it would could technically 
be a beard, but it wouldn't. 

1243
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:05,280
But all men can eventually, once
you're shaving your whole life 

1244
00:54:05,280 --> 00:54:07,160
your your beard, eventually just
grow it. 

1245
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:09,440
Actually I get stubble but it's 
just it's not a beard. 

1246
00:54:09,720 --> 00:54:11,320
Have you ever tried to grow 
longer? 

1247
00:54:11,920 --> 00:54:14,400
No. 
Given that she think you would 

1248
00:54:14,400 --> 00:54:15,880
suit a beard. 
Jordan would love that. 

1249
00:54:15,880 --> 00:54:19,280
Like I've tried a moustache for 
My issue is my hair is too 

1250
00:54:19,360 --> 00:54:21,720
light. 
It just doesn't like you can't. 

1251
00:54:21,840 --> 00:54:23,400
See it? 
You might need to die yours. 

1252
00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:26,440
If you've done the moustache, 
you would look like a young like

1253
00:54:26,440 --> 00:54:28,840
the character Kevin Costner has 
in Yellowstone. 

1254
00:54:29,360 --> 00:54:31,440
Don't tell me out because I'm 
that's me, not shaving. 

1255
00:54:31,960 --> 00:54:34,480
Honestly, I think you would 
think the young guy, the 

1256
00:54:34,480 --> 00:54:36,840
players, a young Kevin Costner 
just has the mistake. 

1257
00:54:37,120 --> 00:54:39,560
Yeah, I think you would, yeah. 
It's made my day. 

1258
00:54:40,160 --> 00:54:42,720
No. 
Tell you what, the comments 

1259
00:54:42,720 --> 00:54:45,360
section on this, but that has 
made my day. 

1260
00:54:45,440 --> 00:54:48,080
Why would the comments? 
People be like, no, I just. 

1261
00:54:48,640 --> 00:54:52,880
Go on will sponsor you do the 
grow grow for Movember do. 

1262
00:54:53,120 --> 00:54:55,280
You know, fucking ringer for and
I know you look like loads of 

1263
00:54:55,280 --> 00:54:58,000
people. 
Johann Croy when he was. 

1264
00:54:58,040 --> 00:54:59,680
Young, yeah, of. 
Me. 

1265
00:54:59,680 --> 00:55:02,240
It's like really close. 
There's an image of him holding 

1266
00:55:02,240 --> 00:55:03,720
the trophy when he played for 
IAX. 

1267
00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:05,200
Oh my God. 
I knew. 

1268
00:55:05,200 --> 00:55:06,400
I don't know. 
It's not me. 

1269
00:55:06,960 --> 00:55:07,840
I don't know. 
It's not you. 

1270
00:55:07,920 --> 00:55:09,040
I might be him and I've had a 
car. 

1271
00:55:09,040 --> 00:55:11,160
Actually genuinely like so 
fucking close I. 

1272
00:55:11,200 --> 00:55:12,880
Really I need to look. 
Everybody hinks. 

1273
00:55:12,880 --> 00:55:15,360
He looks like a young Putin, but
he doesn't like the eyes. 

1274
00:55:15,360 --> 00:55:17,000
Nose too bubbly in him. 
But you know what? 

1275
00:55:17,000 --> 00:55:18,880
I. 
Mean, who's it called you? 

1276
00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:20,320
Sorry. 
Johan Cruyff. 

1277
00:55:20,800 --> 00:55:23,080
Johan so Jo. 
Yeah, H. 

1278
00:55:23,720 --> 00:55:25,320
Han. 
C. 

1279
00:55:25,320 --> 00:55:33,760
RUYFF spitting image. 
But when he's younger. 

1280
00:55:34,960 --> 00:55:38,360
Yeah. 
He's a bit more crowy looking. 

1281
00:55:38,680 --> 00:55:42,040
Thank you you. 
I'm not blowing smoke up your 

1282
00:55:42,040 --> 00:55:42,920
whole but you are better 
looking. 

1283
00:55:42,920 --> 00:55:45,000
If I did have to look like a 
bird, what bird do you think I'm

1284
00:55:45,000 --> 00:55:46,600
most like? 
We Robin. 

1285
00:55:47,200 --> 00:55:52,040
We Robin yeah, they say you're 
either more what is it rat or 

1286
00:55:52,680 --> 00:55:56,480
like people in general fall into
those two categories, rat or 

1287
00:55:56,480 --> 00:55:58,280
bird. 
Is it like that's? 

1288
00:55:58,280 --> 00:56:00,240
The way I've never heard. 
I've never heard of it. 

1289
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:03,000
No, I've never. 
Heard of but it's your new BBC 

1290
00:56:03,000 --> 00:56:05,720
NI show rather bird rather we 
just walk up to your. 

1291
00:56:05,960 --> 00:56:07,520
City centre, let me see your 
bird. 

1292
00:56:07,520 --> 00:56:09,000
Get your attic. 
Something that you would have 

1293
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:10,760
heard in a kitchen at 5:00 in 
the. 

1294
00:56:10,760 --> 00:56:11,560
Morning. 
Yes, maybe. 

1295
00:56:11,880 --> 00:56:13,040
Maybe. 
What's the weirdest thing you've

1296
00:56:13,080 --> 00:56:14,520
ever heard of 1 then? 
Do you know what? 

1297
00:56:14,840 --> 00:56:16,560
Because I can tell you I know 
exactly my. 

1298
00:56:16,600 --> 00:56:20,240
There was a party up in a 
kitchen and poke last night. 

1299
00:56:20,240 --> 00:56:23,080
I didn't happen to be here this 
night but I heard all about it 

1300
00:56:23,080 --> 00:56:24,800
in the kitchens in work the next
day. 

1301
00:56:24,800 --> 00:56:26,760
So where's this fella sitting 
there? 

1302
00:56:26,760 --> 00:56:30,560
It was a girl that I know her 
boyfriend and they were all 

1303
00:56:30,560 --> 00:56:36,320
wiped out on ease and everybody 
was listening to music and 

1304
00:56:36,760 --> 00:56:40,400
turned around and he was just 
sucking the handle of a pot, 

1305
00:56:41,360 --> 00:56:45,640
just sucking it right and off 
pot completely forgot like where

1306
00:56:45,640 --> 00:56:49,440
he was for a start. 
And then apparently it was the 

1307
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:50,760
chef. 
It was telling me Mark, he was 

1308
00:56:50,760 --> 00:56:52,680
like Bruno. 
It was kind of one of those 

1309
00:56:52,680 --> 00:56:56,000
moments where the music just 
went off and everyone was just 

1310
00:56:56,000 --> 00:57:02,200
looking and then he realised and
he just looked up and went and 

1311
00:57:02,200 --> 00:57:05,480
left the party. 
And then I was asking about this

1312
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:07,520
and he was like, nobody has seen
him since. 

1313
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:11,200
He may be living in Perth now 
for all we know, but yeah. 

1314
00:57:11,640 --> 00:57:14,280
Sucking off pot just. 
Sucking off a pot pot handle. 

1315
00:57:14,400 --> 00:57:17,440
What were you able to say? 
Well, mine's was I was at a 

1316
00:57:17,440 --> 00:57:19,680
party and the people that owned 
the house were in bed. 

1317
00:57:20,440 --> 00:57:22,200
So we found out that we were at 
a party. 

1318
00:57:22,200 --> 00:57:24,480
So somebody had brought us back 
to party and then realised the 

1319
00:57:24,480 --> 00:57:28,560
people weren't up and they left.
So you broke into somebody's 

1320
00:57:28,560 --> 00:57:29,600
houses? 
Yeah, technically. 

1321
00:57:29,960 --> 00:57:31,760
And then I was like, well, we 
shouldn't be here. 

1322
00:57:31,960 --> 00:57:33,800
And they were like, oh, but we 
can't go anywhere else. 

1323
00:57:33,800 --> 00:57:36,160
But then I realised I didn't 
know both the people. 

1324
00:57:36,160 --> 00:57:38,240
Bizarre. 
And then they realised that they

1325
00:57:38,240 --> 00:57:40,200
didn't know us either each 
other. 

1326
00:57:41,920 --> 00:57:44,560
So we smoked all the fags that 
we had, but Ronald of everything

1327
00:57:44,560 --> 00:57:46,600
else that we had. 
So they were like, what are we 

1328
00:57:46,600 --> 00:57:48,920
going to do here? 
And then one of the fellas just 

1329
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:52,120
then started thinking, 
overthinking, and he's off his 

1330
00:57:52,120 --> 00:57:57,560
head and drugs and he went TRD. 
I was thinking about this like, 

1331
00:57:57,560 --> 00:58:00,680
I don't know, used to, but I 
need to tell us to somebody. 

1332
00:58:01,560 --> 00:58:05,800
Do you ever think if you turned 
yourself inside out and you 

1333
00:58:05,800 --> 00:58:07,840
poured milk over your head, 
would it stink? 

1334
00:58:10,480 --> 00:58:12,200
And I looked at the old. 
Ladies. 

1335
00:58:12,600 --> 00:58:14,640
That's what he said but I looked
at the other fella at the time 

1336
00:58:14,640 --> 00:58:19,160
and I went to want to get a taxi
and he went oh we left see like 

1337
00:58:19,160 --> 00:58:23,920
2 weeks later I thought about it
and I and actually isn't a bad 

1338
00:58:23,920 --> 00:58:27,640
thought because milks used to 
like soothe heartburn in. 

1339
00:58:27,640 --> 00:58:30,000
Your foot. 
If you're actually turning your 

1340
00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:31,720
flesh inside out, I would. 
It would. 

1341
00:58:31,720 --> 00:58:33,480
Hurt, but I don't even milk when
I. 

1342
00:58:33,720 --> 00:58:35,480
Yeah, I can never get the 
answer. 

1343
00:58:37,120 --> 00:58:39,800
Yeah, there's only one way to 
find out. 

1344
00:58:39,800 --> 00:58:41,120
Clip time. 
Get a knife. 

1345
00:58:41,480 --> 00:58:44,280
Yes, let's do it. 
But I just imagine this person 

1346
00:58:44,280 --> 00:58:46,840
turned inside out putting milk. 
I actually think it would. 

1347
00:58:46,880 --> 00:58:49,200
It would soothe. 
I think you would soothe, yeah. 

1348
00:58:49,240 --> 00:58:50,240
You would feel a lot. 
Better. 

1349
00:58:50,240 --> 00:58:52,400
Well, that's a wee bit better, 
but still like, not. 

1350
00:58:52,400 --> 00:58:55,760
But also can somebody please on 
inside out my skin please? 

1351
00:58:56,280 --> 00:58:59,000
Don't say that on the because 
you see 2025, you say that 

1352
00:58:59,000 --> 00:59:01,240
you'll get messages. 
What do you mean people want to 

1353
00:59:01,240 --> 00:59:03,880
do that? 
People. 

1354
00:59:03,880 --> 00:59:06,000
If Bruno goes, I want people to 
turn my skin inside out, 

1355
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:08,000
somebody will reply. 
Do you actually want me to do 

1356
00:59:08,000 --> 00:59:09,160
that? 
Oh my God. 

1357
00:59:09,240 --> 00:59:10,720
I get the boss down from Andrew.
No, there's. 

1358
00:59:11,560 --> 00:59:14,000
A guy one time put up a thing 
about he wanted somebody to come

1359
00:59:14,000 --> 00:59:15,280
and eat his testicles and watch 
it. 

1360
00:59:15,680 --> 00:59:17,440
I know. 
No, it was just it was a Dick. 

1361
00:59:18,040 --> 00:59:20,400
It's that like those people that
like, like having it stood on 

1362
00:59:20,400 --> 00:59:22,520
with heels. 
And no, this is way past that. 

1363
00:59:23,000 --> 00:59:24,800
I don't get that. 
What do you mean like? 

1364
00:59:24,800 --> 00:59:27,960
This is like a guy who. 
Oh, he in Germany he sent out a 

1365
00:59:27,960 --> 00:59:29,920
message saying I want somebody 
to cut my Dick off. 

1366
00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:32,680
Needed no. 
Sorry, he wanted to be eaten 

1367
00:59:32,960 --> 00:59:35,320
alive and then he did it. 
Yes, and then the first thing 

1368
00:59:35,320 --> 00:59:37,600
they did was fried his cock at 
it. 

1369
00:59:38,880 --> 00:59:40,040
But. 
Too chewy? 

1370
00:59:40,800 --> 00:59:42,960
Yeah, I can imagine. 
Like what would you do with the 

1371
00:59:42,960 --> 00:59:45,520
garlic butter or something? 
Oh yeah, now we're talking. 

1372
00:59:45,560 --> 00:59:47,400
Or you could like put something 
in it. 

1373
00:59:47,760 --> 00:59:49,000
I stuff it. 
Yep. 

1374
00:59:49,360 --> 00:59:52,600
Like down the middle, it would 
need to be like just fucking a 

1375
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:56,040
scallion or something, you know,
scallion and like straight down,

1376
00:59:56,280 --> 00:59:58,480
straight through it because it 
would go straight through and 

1377
00:59:58,520 --> 01:00:00,480
you'd be like what? 
About a WE sticker, you can make

1378
01:00:00,480 --> 01:00:04,080
it sweet WE stick of vanilla. 
And I don't think sweet cock 

1379
01:00:04,080 --> 01:00:06,920
would be nice. 
It need to be like fried wrapped

1380
01:00:06,920 --> 01:00:10,000
in bacon if he's if he's 
circumcised because you need 

1381
01:00:10,000 --> 01:00:11,920
something around the outside. 
Do you know what I mean? 

1382
01:00:11,920 --> 01:00:15,520
And then like stuffed with sage 
and onion and fried in garlic 

1383
01:00:15,520 --> 01:00:16,600
butter. 
I would eat. 

1384
01:00:16,680 --> 01:00:18,120
My mouse water. 
It's. 

1385
01:00:18,320 --> 01:00:22,120
A lot of jocks. 
What specials have you? 

1386
01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:25,640
Yeah, this isn't Dick scuffing 
at all. 

1387
01:00:26,040 --> 01:00:27,880
It's lovely. 
And though some guy will be 

1388
01:00:27,880 --> 01:00:30,480
messing and you're like, I'm 
getting humour right now. 

1389
01:00:30,640 --> 01:00:32,440
But like, if it's a sexual 
thing, right? 

1390
01:00:32,440 --> 01:00:33,880
See if it's some kind of 
paraphilia. 

1391
01:00:34,120 --> 01:00:36,520
Surely if they cut your deck off
you're not going to enjoy that. 

1392
01:00:37,080 --> 01:00:39,440
No, thank you. 
Do gradually you would 

1393
01:00:39,440 --> 01:00:42,960
definitely you'd be. 
Just before I go onstage, like, 

1394
01:00:43,960 --> 01:00:46,800
think of what he was doing 
before, Yeah. 

1395
01:00:47,320 --> 01:00:51,000
Get really nervous, yeah. 
Yeah, well, I don't know there. 

1396
01:00:51,360 --> 01:00:53,520
Have you seen the video of that 
guy who put like a rubber band 

1397
01:00:53,520 --> 01:00:57,120
around his bollocks and waited 
for them to turn black and. 

1398
01:00:57,120 --> 01:00:59,640
Cut them off, madness. 
Don't you? 

1399
01:00:59,680 --> 01:01:00,960
I do. 
No, I don't want people on the 

1400
01:01:00,960 --> 01:01:02,520
Internet. 
I see you having kids. 

1401
01:01:02,560 --> 01:01:05,240
I you wouldn't even. 
That's why I can be all about 

1402
01:01:05,280 --> 01:01:05,920
top groups. 
No, I. 

1403
01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:09,600
Don't want the stuff that gets 
saved in your in your arc. 

1404
01:01:09,680 --> 01:01:12,800
Your phone from what? 
But I don't get the good my 

1405
01:01:13,680 --> 01:01:17,760
Curtis is in WhatsApp groups 
with guys from here and he lets 

1406
01:01:17,760 --> 01:01:20,560
me go on his phone because he's 
like, you'll like this? 

1407
01:01:20,800 --> 01:01:22,920
Yes, he's not interested. 
You want to be in the. 

1408
01:01:23,240 --> 01:01:25,840
I want to be in the guys 
WhatsApp group and he'll like 

1409
01:01:25,840 --> 01:01:27,600
show me all the mad stuff and 
I'll. 

1410
01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:28,920
Go I just. 
Want to like Get Ready with me 

1411
01:01:28,920 --> 01:01:30,080
videos and all that kind of 
stuff? 

1412
01:01:30,120 --> 01:01:33,160
Yeah, I, I don't want the girls 
group chat, I want the lads 

1413
01:01:33,160 --> 01:01:36,200
group chat so that I can be nosy
because they get all the best. 

1414
01:01:36,240 --> 01:01:38,600
Do you know what I mean? 
Like this one's doing this and 

1415
01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:40,680
this one's doing. 
Do you remember that video about

1416
01:01:40,680 --> 01:01:43,200
all the guys in Scotland and the
football team that were bragging

1417
01:01:43,200 --> 01:01:45,960
one another? 
No. 

1418
01:01:46,280 --> 01:01:52,760
See this is a transfer. 
So there was this football team 

1419
01:01:52,800 --> 01:01:54,880
in. 
Looking left. 

1420
01:01:55,560 --> 01:02:02,320
I'll tell you now, I'm a goal, 
but he. 

1421
01:02:02,720 --> 01:02:05,160
Just did the physio. 
They were all they were living. 

1422
01:02:05,160 --> 01:02:10,320
In an hour, you see me in social
media with a shirt, You look. 

1423
01:02:10,320 --> 01:02:14,720
We've seen Johan crave Don't you
give your real name because you 

1424
01:02:14,720 --> 01:02:15,840
don't want people to know your 
real. 

1425
01:02:15,840 --> 01:02:16,560
Name. 
So what so? 

1426
01:02:17,320 --> 01:02:19,440
They were all from. 
Was it Stranraer or something? 

1427
01:02:19,840 --> 01:02:21,600
Makes sense? 
Now, so they Yeah. 

1428
01:02:21,600 --> 01:02:25,720
Stranraer. 
Stranraer, Yes, Stan's rear 

1429
01:02:26,480 --> 01:02:28,760
they. 
So surprisingly. 

1430
01:02:29,240 --> 01:02:32,040
One of the girls, one of their 
girls was away and had a Ring 

1431
01:02:32,040 --> 01:02:34,840
doorbell and he told her he was 
going to bed and she was like, 

1432
01:02:34,880 --> 01:02:38,640
well clearly you're not because 
we're just seeing a lot of 

1433
01:02:38,640 --> 01:02:42,600
people coming in. 
So she she got suspicious and 

1434
01:02:42,600 --> 01:02:45,000
she went through his phone right
now. 

1435
01:02:45,000 --> 01:02:47,080
They tried to crack that. 
They all just ended up wiped out

1436
01:02:47,080 --> 01:02:48,120
at a party and writing each 
other. 

1437
01:02:48,120 --> 01:02:50,000
But I've seen the videos and 
this thing was pre planned 

1438
01:02:50,000 --> 01:02:51,560
because they were all wearing 
lingerie and shit. 

1439
01:02:52,160 --> 01:02:57,400
So the whole football team. 
There's no way you get 11 guys 

1440
01:02:57,400 --> 01:02:58,520
to get in on this. 
There was about. 

1441
01:02:58,520 --> 01:03:01,760
Six or seven of them, right? 
Half the football team maybe, 

1442
01:03:01,760 --> 01:03:05,160
yeah, unless it was 5, say, and 
they were two extras, right? 

1443
01:03:05,440 --> 01:03:10,000
But they were all very much, 
very much enjoying themselves. 

1444
01:03:10,200 --> 01:03:13,640
And then as obviously these 
group chat things go, somebody 

1445
01:03:13,640 --> 01:03:15,920
has done the whole deep dive and
went on, they can find their 

1446
01:03:15,920 --> 01:03:18,920
Facebooks and this one has a kid
and this one's married and this 

1447
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:22,920
one this and this one's this. 
And like full blood samples, 

1448
01:03:23,000 --> 01:03:25,320
like blood tape, everything you 
could find out where they lived.

1449
01:03:25,600 --> 01:03:27,240
And I was just so far, I was 
like. 

1450
01:03:27,440 --> 01:03:29,400
The manager told us to get balls
in the box. 

1451
01:03:29,520 --> 01:03:32,640
Yeah. 
It's just a team building. 

1452
01:03:32,840 --> 01:03:36,560
Yeah, that's what it was. 
They're literally just crawling 

1453
01:03:36,560 --> 01:03:38,640
all over each other. 
It is mental. 

1454
01:03:38,680 --> 01:03:41,920
But I was like, what? 
And Kurt was like, I don't look.

1455
01:03:41,920 --> 01:03:43,800
Yeah, yeah. 
But he was. 

1456
01:03:43,800 --> 01:03:45,080
He was like, I haven't watched 
them. 

1457
01:03:45,280 --> 01:03:46,720
And I was like, well, I'm 
watching them. 

1458
01:03:47,680 --> 01:03:49,480
So that's the kind of stuff that
he gets. 

1459
01:03:49,480 --> 01:03:52,440
And he's like here enhance me as
phone and I'm like. 

1460
01:03:52,600 --> 01:03:54,360
I love these like I've never 
watched them. 

1461
01:03:55,560 --> 01:03:58,240
Yeah, no, he genuinely, because 
I know whenever like the group 

1462
01:03:58,240 --> 01:04:01,240
chat, see the stag group chat, 
he doesn't open it and there's 

1463
01:04:01,240 --> 01:04:04,320
like I go, you have about 300 
unread messages and he goes, I 

1464
01:04:04,320 --> 01:04:06,920
don't have fucking time to sit 
and I'm like what I do. 

1465
01:04:08,600 --> 01:04:15,240
Party SSE Arena, He's back 
November 7th of November. 

1466
01:04:15,240 --> 01:04:18,160
What is a fucking crack? 
You and fucking Willy both got 

1467
01:04:18,160 --> 01:04:21,400
it wrong. 
Willy actually off by heart. 

1468
01:04:21,400 --> 01:04:22,400
Know your. 
Date. 

1469
01:04:22,640 --> 01:04:25,200
It's October. 
October, yes. 

1470
01:04:25,920 --> 01:04:29,680
October the 17th. 2025. 25 very.
Good McDonald. 

1471
01:04:29,920 --> 01:04:31,720
Back in the SSE. 
Goats out. 

1472
01:04:32,080 --> 01:04:36,000
Goats out and I'm turn as well. 
I'm going to be turn talking to 

1473
01:04:36,000 --> 01:04:38,840
Joe and Shane about it. 
So I'm going to be doing like 

1474
01:04:39,200 --> 01:04:41,000
obviously not the SS. 
Later in the year. 

1475
01:04:41,440 --> 01:04:47,760
In yes, October, November, umm, 
I'm doing just all the way, you 

1476
01:04:47,760 --> 01:04:51,400
know, like the venues, the lame,
like the fucking Mandela, that 

1477
01:04:51,400 --> 01:04:53,920
sort of stuff, you know, keeping
it small town because I'm not 

1478
01:04:53,920 --> 01:04:58,040
going to be fucking telling 
feeling anything. 

1479
01:04:59,800 --> 01:05:02,720
I'm not going to be fucking. 
Shut up. 

1480
01:05:03,040 --> 01:05:05,680
Get them to come into your show.
You want to see a blue level. 

1481
01:05:05,880 --> 01:05:10,120
But yes, I am going to be doing 
like my first ever what's a show

1482
01:05:10,160 --> 01:05:13,520
called Decent, decent tour. 
I was actually thinking a call, 

1483
01:05:13,520 --> 01:05:16,240
not just something that I say 
all the time. 

1484
01:05:16,240 --> 01:05:19,640
Don't realise this, not me. 
That's good. 

1485
01:05:19,920 --> 01:05:22,040
Not I mean. 
Do you have a thing for? 

1486
01:05:22,200 --> 01:05:25,760
The show, not, I mean just the 
theme is going to be like all 

1487
01:05:25,760 --> 01:05:31,560
the shit that like is my bugbear
and because that's whenever I'm 

1488
01:05:31,560 --> 01:05:33,360
like talking about stuff that 
really fucking annoys me and I 

1489
01:05:33,360 --> 01:05:36,480
go, do you know what I mean? 
And like a lot of people don't 

1490
01:05:36,480 --> 01:05:38,160
know what I mean. 
Once you actually have the 

1491
01:05:38,160 --> 01:05:41,120
dates, come back on. 
Yes, definitely. 

1492
01:05:41,120 --> 01:05:44,200
Thank you very much. 
Patreon.com/TV Podcast if you 

1493
01:05:44,200 --> 01:05:46,880
want more from the pod in a 
couple days. 

1494
01:05:46,880 --> 01:05:48,280
We're about to film the next 
special. 

1495
01:05:48,800 --> 01:05:50,200
All the previous ones are up on 
there. 

1496
01:05:50,480 --> 01:05:57,240
This goes out on next Wednesday.
Wednesday 60s Well, I've still 

1497
01:05:57,240 --> 01:06:00,560
got the Dagger tour happening, 
so come to that before. 

1498
01:06:00,920 --> 01:06:02,680
Are you going to show people 
your dagger on the dagger tour? 

1499
01:06:02,680 --> 01:06:05,760
No. 
Thanks in description link a 

1500
01:06:05,760 --> 01:06:06,880
lobby in Cheers. 
Everybody, thank you.