Today's guest is one of the most influential men.
Whatever pro nanny goes as in British entertainment history,
he's described as a snail by some people who watched Trigger
Happy TV. He's a journalist, broadcaster,
entrepreneur and all round entertainer.
Mr. Don Jolly. All right.
What an honour. Yeah, Mr. Dom Jolly to have you.
And I've been wanting to interview you for a long time.
And I just thought the opportunity came around.
Obviously, you know, the show's called Don't Ask Me That
podcast. I do know that, which is
questions people don't want to be asked because I go.
That's a relief for me. Exactly this goes to areas where
people. Yeah, like something a bit
different because I always get asked the same stuff you get.
Asked the same thing. Is there anything?
Yes, that of other things that I don't want you to ask me about.
Yes. Shall I just list them?
Just list them and I I want big. Mobile phone ringtone, Snail
going to school with Bin Laden diplomat hitting David Miller in
the face. I'm A Celebrity reality shows.
I think that's about it really. I wouldn't mind if you mentioned
Trig Happy TV 25th Anniversary tour because that's what I'm
here to plug. But apart from that, I honestly,
I I'm not talking about any of that other stuff.
OK, I won't ask you about any of those subjects.
That's what that's why I did this, because it's nice.
Yeah, but you, you went to school in Beirut, a high school
called Bromana, which was the, as you're a, you're a Quaker,
right? Yeah.
And you went from the ages of 6 to 10 to that school, which is
was the same school that Osama bin Laden went to?
No, but. You asked.
I just thought we were. We no just can we?
All I asked him was fuck off. You said we weren't.
Going to talk about. This, No, but it was the bin
Laden reference. Are you ready?
All right, Yeah. Thanks for coming back, Dom.
Listen, I'm sorry about the mix up.
I know it looks bad, but I just, I go on so many podcasts and I'm
asked the same questions every time.
And genuinely, why I like this one was because I could say, can
we talk about something else? Sure.
And no offence to you, but I spoke to your producer.
Yeah, first question you asked me, same old, like rubber.
It's the same thing. So I just thought it would be
different, that's all. But I'm sorry, I probably
behaved. Badly.
But yeah, that we'll go on to some stress at the, yeah, more
pedestrian stuff. Paul Chowdhry's Don't Ask Me
That is sponsored by Mrs. Elswood Pickles.
Genuinely top tier Pickles give you a lunch, a proper upgrade
with Mrs. Elswood. They're brilliant in sandwiches,
they're great in burgers and a game changer in salads.
Pick up a jar the next time you're at the shop.
I have been a fan of yours, Dom, for a long, long time.
Really a long time. It's very good.
I was waiting for the opportunity to meet you, but it
had to be the right reason. It's like if you were to work
with Peter O'Toole or. That would be a drink.
Yeah, yeah, I'm genuinely a fan of yours.
Obviously say that to anyone who's podcast I'm on, but I I
genuinely love your stuff. So I'm very excited because.
You've been on some very right wing podcast recently, so I take
that as well. I've been on every podcast.
I mean, I mean, it's literally I think I'm the only person in
Britain without a podcast. And, and actually we were just
discussing, I'm going to make one where we just don't record
anything. Which would be the best podcast?
I I actually first saw you obviously on within the
broadcasting world, but on Edgeware road you used to go and
get like kebabs. Kebabs.
Shawamas. Shawamas, Yeah, yeah, Shawamas
at the end of Edgy by Road near Marble Arch in the early 2000s.
Well, I did. Ma rouche is Ma rouche juice
might go. Not Maurice juice.
Ma Rouche. The original.
The original one. Well, there's three.
There's beach in place. And yeah, yeah, there's very
much my area of speciality. Yeah.
But Ma rouche is great because not only, you know, I grew up in
Lebanon, so, like, Lebanese food is the greatest food on Earth.
And Ma Rouche was about the only place I've ever been where it
came close to what you get in Lebanon, but also, you know,
Mauritian beach in place in Knightsbridge.
Very posh. This one's just a ship hit.
And it had random photos of, like, Rambo and stuff around.
But also it was open 24 hours. That's the joy.
So yeah, I was always. So I used to go after gigs and I
used to see you in there with your wife and your friends.
Yeah, Yeah. And I just.
I don't have any friends but I was definitely there my wife.
And I thought I cannot approach Don Jolly.
I really, it was like seeing Elvis and Bill cough and I
wouldn't approach you. Really.
Yeah, I thought, I can't. This is the trigger happy TV
days. Yeah.
For some reason they didn't know who the the staff.
No, they didn't know. It's quite funny.
Which is weird. I was thinking Don Jolly is sat
in the restaurant. They didn't know.
And yet weirdly, the other place I used to go at that time was a
place called Bertarelli's in Notting Hill.
And they were great. It was like one of those old
school trattorias like Italian restaurants.
And when he rang up to book, they'd say, you know, we're not
at the famous Bertarelli's Yellow.
So they were already there. And they, like my my parents
divorced in their and met my wife in that room and and then
we used to go there all the time.
And when trigger happy happened, they went, I can't say mentally
more neurodivergent and they got me.
They had a wall like all those Italian restaurants with people
inside. It was things like it had China
crisis. Remember the bang China crisis
said it said to Bertarelli from China crisis.
And I think how does that happen?
Like China crisis comes into the restaurant.
Like how does Mr. Bertarelli know China crisis?
He doesn't. So they must have said, you
know, were China crisis and then he must have looked them up and
then what? They're carrying a photograph
for themselves. But anyway, Long story short, it
they asked us to go on the wall. That was the greatest moment of
fame for me. In Maroof.
No, in in Bertolis, Marooch, nothing like that.
I mean, I would talk to them in Arabic.
They just go fuck off. Like they're not interested.
Yeah. Because obviously you grew up in
Beirut, Lebanon. To British parents, yeah, that's
a thing they've put into the thing that British parents is,
is well. I, I kind of say that because
it's part of the story, because everyone assumes, I mean, I
look, you know, I've got brown eyes, black hair.
I look Lebanese. And it's not that I wouldn't
want to be Lebanese. I've been incredibly proud.
I loved Lebanese. But it's just, I think part of
my identity is I grew up in Lebanon, but I was English.
Yeah, but I got sent to school here where I was this weird kid
that lived in Lebanon, so I've never fitted in.
So that's why I think it's important to say as British
parents. Because at the time your parents
were were kidnapped. No, but they're not kidnapped.
And you were born there because they were under house arrest at
the time. No, I don't think that's the
case, but unless I've been misinformed.
But yeah, I mean, that's a better story than I.
Used to tell, yeah. Yeah, they were.
They were. They were taken there by boat
from Turkey. Because then you went to Brumana
High School. Brumana High School.
Ramana, which is near Beirut, which is a Quaker school.
It is a Quaker school. Who invented?
Porridge. It was a yeah, it was a Quaker
school set up by Quakers from Darlington in 1865.
And it's a really beautiful place.
And I have no idea what Quakers from Darlington were doing in
the hills above Beirut, but they did build this beautiful school.
And I went there for two years. And that's of course, which is
probably what we're getting at, where I went to school with
someone very famous, more famous than me, imagine.
And me put together. Both of us put together, Yeah
was into demolition. He was very much in Dewey.
He was, Yeah. His whole family was in
construction, but he went into destruction.
Yeah. You know he'd like just.
Do you think he did that to get his family more business?
I. Think, well, it's a bit like I
live in the Cotswolds and like there's.
Should we just say who it is, by the way?
Yes, Osama bin Laden, just to pause there.
It's a pause. Yeah.
Looked him up on Friends Reunited but nothing.
Because a lot of people there's conspiracy theory he never
existed really Well, this is these things online where
there's. Lots of conspiracy.
I wrote a book on conspiracies. I didn't know that one.
I don't know if he existed. I mean, again, people say.
Well, you knew he existed because he went to.
Your school? Well, he did get what?
You said next to it but. Did he?
He was 18, I was 6. And people say, did you hang out
together? No, like he didn't sort of put
his arm around me. He wasn't for a start in 1974,
which is when that would be. He wasn't like, dressed with a
Kalashnikov, like going in. There's a picture of the Bin
Ladens at the exact same time that I was at school with them
and they're all on a holiday in Stockholm.
They look like Partridge family. They're wearing like loom flares
and stuff like that. But no, I've no memory of him at
all. So, but apparently he's quite, I
don't know if this is a compliment, but he was trendy,
wasn't he? He was kind of like just just go
out with girls and. A hipster?
Yeah, hipster. I think so at the.
Time. I don't know if a hipster is
existing in the 70s. It's a 70s hipster.
A hipster. But technically they were just
people. Just people having fun.
Now when you're a hipster. Yeah, now you're a hipster.
Some people think this is a hipster look.
Or it is a terrorist. No, it's you can that the joy of
that is multifunctional, you know, now depending on where you
are, Yeah, take that jacket off, whack on an AK and you're off.
Habibi, that was obviously from the age of 6 to 10 and then and
and another you, you spoke in an interview about in 1975 the
outbreak of civil, the civil war in Lebanon.
Yeah, that wasn't good. Is and and then you were
enrolled into the army. Then I joined the army and I
fought for the Phalange militia for seven years.
One of the best militias. If you're looking for a militia,
they're one of the best. The Katayeb.
And yes, I think that formed me a lot.
Certainly comedianly. Because historically, a lot of
people with this background don't tend to obviously Bin
Laden. Imagine he went into comedy and
he went into deconstruction. I mean, I always think people
ask me what I'd do if I wasn't a comedian, and a lot of people
say you're not a comedian. They say that to me, yeah.
And I, I always say sniper and I'm sort of half joking, but I,
I do quite fancy the life of a sniper.
I like, I'm not a patient person, but it's quite a Zen
thing. You have to crawl very slowly
towards the edge of a Cliff for three years and then you just
sit and you've got a mate with you who's looking through a
telescope. And then after about 5 days you,
I believe the term, the Andy McNab term is you slot your,
your target and then you crawl out.
And that strikes me as that quite a satisfying job.
Weirdly, you did crawl though, didn't you?
You used to crawl as a snail. I did across the road.
I think that's my finest hour. The.
Snail. So in a way, you did do that.
Without a rifle. Without a rifle, but as a snail.
Yes, I was a snail sniper. Holding up traffic within
central London. Yeah, but centralish?
Yeah. Restless Gardens.
You were the the Snail version of Abbey Road.
Yes, well, actually, funnily enough.
So you're talking about the scene in Trig Abbey where I
crawl across a zebra crossing dressed as a snail and everyone
thinks that is Abbey Road and I'm like, but that wouldn't make
sense. Like there's no Beatles
reference to that, but there's only room for one famous zebra
crossing in Britain, is what I found out.
Yeah. It's actually Redcliffe Gardens,
but there's no plaque outside it, which there should be.
Yeah, there should be. We should change that.
Yeah, I'll speak to Sadiq. Good.
Yeah, London is. So you've taken over, Mike?
Honestly, I get that. So much so I'm going to do an
early plug for Trig Happy just because it's relevant.
I'm doing the Trig Happy 25th anniversary and and I did some
show, some big shows before the tour that I'm going to do.
And to promote that, I kept posting a different clip from
Trigger Happy from back in the day, every day online.
And every time I put anything that was in London, just the
comments underneath, like fuck it couldn't do that now.
You'd be stabbed, it's woke, you'd be arrested.
It's like, which made me actually go out and film new
stuff because I was like, maybe I'm wrong, like maybe it is all
different. Didn't get stabbed.
I didn't get stabbed. No, it was exactly surprised.
I think very weirdly doing what I do on the streets or trigger
happy stuff is like a really good social because people go
oh, you're just in your whatever.
I live in my celebrity Ivot Tower, Castle Penthouse and the
Cotswolds. But I'm in around a lot on the
streets and I think it's the best way of judging.
And I'm honestly would say London has not changed in 25
years, certainly in terms of hidden camera filming.
Well, there's too many ethnics now.
Well, of course, but I can't do anything.
About that, you can't even even say there's.
There's you're not allowed to say ethnic, Yeah.
Because I was born Browns. Browns Yeah, I was born in
London in the 70s and. Were you though?
This is I think it's weird because the racism.
It says on your on your pilot's licence.
Anyway on my on my Osama bin Laden license, but at the time
the the rhetoric was when my dad came to England in 196064 and
then he not powered the speech in 68.
Where did your parents come from?
From the Punjab, did they? So we come from a place called
Rawal Bindi, which was India. And then we became refugees
because there was a partition in 1947, as you know, you're a
historian. And we were refugees around
India. And eventually my dad came to
England in 64, as did some of his brothers earlier and some
later. And it was all looking good for
a couple of years, looking good, and then he not.
Power he not power of blooded did it in in Birmingham as well.
Yeah. You know, is that where they
went in our country? Right.
Yeah, in your town. And, and weirdly, that rhetoric
is this history repeats itself. Yeah, it does.
But it's not much difference in what they were saying to me in
the 80s growing up as to what they're saying now, because I
thought we would have probably outgrown racism by now.
Well, this is very funny and I'm sorry to be back referencing
other podcasts, but I just was on this right wing podcast
Heretics. And he was saying so when he was
talking about racism. So he's a Jewish guy and he's
very anti Islam. And he was saying, you know, I'm
friends of David Baddiel, but you and David Baddiel grew up in
an era where there was a lot of racism.
He goes, whereas I grew up with no racism.
I go, well, if you grew up with no racism, Well, he's so angry
by the Muslims he gets because they're they're going to it was
like future crimes. It's very odd.
They're going to, yeah, they're going to.
Well, they're going to take over as I think.
They're doing that. Things like dominating prayers.
Yeah, that's quite frightening. It's very frightening.
Yeah, because. Because prayers work.
They do work. Yeah.
You ever prayed for something in it?
No, because I'm not religious. Yeah, but did you start becoming
religious? And if you pray?
I'm sure it would work, I've prayed many times in my career,
but nothing. Do you think it's the laws of
attraction dressed up? I don't know what that means.
So the laws of attraction, they think laws of the universe is if
you manifest something. Oh, it seems true.
Yeah, that's what prayer is, right?
Well, yes. So it's a prayer can not be just
a religious thing, but it's never worked for me.
But I manifested Don Jolly coming on the podcast.
Yeah, well, actually someone just rang me like it's much
easier, yeah. But I manifested, yeah.
But I didn't, I mean no offence, but I'm doing every podcast.
I love podcasts. You're one of the hardest people
to get on a podcast. You very rarely do any
interviews. Yeah.
That's how I'm going to plug it. Very rarely, yeah.
An. Exclusive.
Yeah, this is actually the first interview I've done since 2004.
Yes, it's quite, I'm quite nervous about it because I can't
remember any of my stories. You're like the Bonnie Blue of
podcast. I really am.
I think I've slept with more podcasters than Bonnie Blue, but
yeah. But what was it like being?
In Lebanon at the time when it was amazing, you know, Lebanon
for women. I mean, what for women, for
women, Great. Again, Lebanon was a Maronite
Christian country when I grew up.
And then the civil war kind of split it.
And, you know, the Muslims ruined it, obviously.
So that's why they've got to leave.
And then you came here. Yeah, and then you went to
boarding school. Yeah, it's not my fault.
Yeah, and your dad didn't really agree with that either, but he
decided to Chuck you in there. My dad went to the same boarding
school that I went to, haste it so much, got savagely bullied
and probably sodomized and so thought, well I'll send my kid
there. And the same.
Thing happened here, so it was fine, you know, never did him
any harm. Well, it did, and it certainly
harmed me. Is that why white people put
their parents in care homes? I think it's possibly that I
mean there is that thing that people genuinely who are
sexually abused as kids tend to sexually abuse later on.
And you'd think why would like that's complete opposite why we
put them in care homes because it's the smell of urine and just
boredom. You know, the people are living
longer and I just haven't got the time for that.
I'm too busy. Yeah, but you're a young man, I
mean. But I put my mum in one.
Oh, you care, Home. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And you go and visit. You know who owns?
She's dead. Oh, she sorry.
Together. That's right, it's just life
wouldn't. It take a break.
No. When when did this happen?
Four years ago. Sorry to hear that.
It's. All right, honestly, it's
absolutely fine. Just that's, I mean, it's going
to happen to all of us, hopefully.
Apart from you. You get me.
Because you've you've you've got it.
Yeah, absolutely. You haven't aged.
No, if you go on podcasts, nothing happens.
Nothing happens if you go back to the early 2000s of Trogappi
TV and one of the best, if not the best show on Channel 4 in my
opinion. I'd be, yeah.
I'm, I'm very proud of Trigger Happy TV.
Oh, it's incredible. Yeah, it stands the test of
time. What?
I wouldn't say that.
But twice a day I get up, someone coming telling me how
much they enjoyed phone jacker. It's a very different thing.
Though it is a very different thing.
But yeah, it's just you. Know until you tried it on the
street. And people are a bit dim.
Face Jacker? Yeah.
Face Jacker. Well, he just used all my crew
on Face Jacker. It was the same, same team.
Yeah, they they all went off. Yeah.
So you ripped me off. Oh, a cave and Novak.
Yeah, I can't tell you. Very.
But obviously after the dragon, Yeah.
You went to Haileybury in Hertfordshire, Yeah.
And then you'll. Love Haileybury because it's
original form. Haileybury was set up to train
people to run India. That's what it was originally
about. The train tracks.
Yeah, yeah. And, and basically set it up.
And then when India became independent, there must have
been a moment at the school where they thought, fuck, what
do we do now? And they just thought, let's
just crack on. So I'm fully trained to run
India. Should I get the call?
But I I don't think, I mean it's not.
So they were training the colonizers?
Yeah, even after colonization it ended.
Well, I think they just just in case that was the whole reason,
debt. And then when when when when
India became independent, I think they thought, well, who
knows, Like if they fuck it up, we might still be needed.
Yeah. So I was like the reserves.
Yeah, that was the Subs. So I've been hanging around on
the side side of the pitch waiting.
You are the sub coloniser, yeah. The sub colonent, The
subcontinent coloniser, Yeah. Because if there ever came a day
where we had to take back certain territories, you would
be well equipped. I'd be well equipped.
I'm completely ready to run. Where would we?
Where would we start though? America, I think definitely
would say. Because that was the last.
Yeah, but also I think it's the one in most need of taking back.
250 years has been now. Yeah, it's not long.
No, not long long enough. They've really, but they've
really accelerated in the last sort of nine years of what
they've done. What a great country America is.
Yeah, it really is. It's fucking smashing place.
I'm actually banned from America at the moment.
Are you? Yeah, generally you.
So you can't get the O1 visa. I did have an O1, but that was a
long time ago when I was an alien of exceptional ability.
And you still are. Now my Esther was just refused
because of social media activity, which basically is
code for me saying Trump is a cunt.
A lot, yeah. Well.
Cut that. Trump is a twunt.
We'll keep it in the long form, but I won't put that one up on
social media because I'm doing Netflix is a Joke on May the 6th
in Pasadena. Oh, are you?
So tell you what, Trump's doing a great job.
What a great job Trump has done in America.
I just taught in America. I actually had to leave because
of ICE. Did you did you use genuinely?
There was a big store. What's that?
There we go. Yeah, that's very good.
So I'm going to use that joke. Yeah, let's take a look.
Until it did. You use when you went to
America, did you take your actual phone and did they ask to
see your social media or did you take a burner phone?
Well, I, I did a whole route. No, I actually took my phone,
but they didn't actually ask to go through my phone.
I got interviewed. At they do though, and.
Now they do. The difference prior to that was
to that, I think that was announced in December, November,
right, 2025 when they said we're going to check your social media
traffic or. Yeah.
And if you if you don't give me your password and open it up,
they'll send you back or lock you.
Up. Oh really?
Yeah, yeah, because they, they just, they just used to say what
what you doing here and what was your work?
And I just just show them a flyer of the of the dates.
Yeah, because they're quite impressed by stand up.
Less impressed by me. First time I went as an alien of
exceptional ability. I actually went with a big
mobile phone and this was just after 911.
And that did not go down well because they looked at my
passport. Born in Beirut, I'd just been to
Iran. They saw I went to school,
that's on Bin Laden. And then I've got a massive
mobile phone that when they asked me to turn it on, didn't
work and they honestly just refused to understand the
concept of a prop. It's weird because slapstick is
still very popular in America and they couldn't understand.
But they don't understand slapstick on at airports, I
think. The no.
Well, the two things that I'm sort of good at slapstick and
and travelling. And clowning.
And clowning because I'm a travel writer.
I've been to 108 countries but the countries I've been to are
not countries that America likes.
So I've got 2 British passports. Again doesn't matter it's
British. But just saying 1-2 different
countries and one is 1 is supposedly for my dodgy
countries and one is for like getting into America and I
always take the wrong 1 and I forget and then it becomes a
nightmare. Why have you got 2?
So because I go to a politically incompatible.
Country and you need a different passport for that.
Well, so for instance, if I go to Israel, I get a stamp and
that I'd never be loud in Lebanon.
And if I go to Lebanon I wouldn't be loud.
I mean, there are all sorts of places.
And this is you can do this, I can I could do.
This. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can do
that. But I mean, for instance, when I
go to America, I don't want to present my passport that shows
I've just been in North Korea and Iran, especially right now.
Have you been to North? Korea, I have yeah.
For for my book The Dark Tourist.
And how did you get in? Well, I flew there.
I I was, I was covering the Olympics in Beijing in 2008 and
I met a guy who ran the only sort of travel tour goes through
and it's like it's literally a package tour.
You turn up, you, everything gets taken away at the airport
and then you get put on a coach with this absolute weird guide
who works for the government and you're just taken to some of the
dullest things you've ever seen. Like first day was the Museum of
Agricultural Scythes and Lathes, followed by the dear leaders
mother's Tomb. And of course, because it's
North Korean, it's so shit. It's fantastic.
You like give us more, but it's crazy.
So yeah, it's a very weird place, the weirdest place I've
ever been. It's the closest you'll come to
of space travel, right? Because it's just like nowhere
else. Because everyone else in the
world now, wherever you go, you're 400 meters from a
Starbucks, really, But in North Korea, really, genuinely is off
the grid. Even worse than China.
Well, way worse than China Jesus, but there's obviously
China has lots of Starbucks. Yeah, there's lots of Starbucks,
but you can't, you can't say certain things in.
Oh, no, I've got China's. China's like a liberal utopia.
That's North Korea. Yeah, yeah, 100%.
Although China's so good on the technology that they're kind of
spying on you secretly now, whereas North Korea's not really
there yet. There was no Internet in the
first thing I did in North Korea, they put you on a hotel
in the middle of the river on an island and it's the only place
you can stay as a foreigner. And the only other thing on that
island is a nine hole golf course that when I went down to
it, it had a ball on a cushion. And I said, what was that?
And they said, oh, the dear leader turned up, never played
golf before, but nine holes in one, you're like, come on.
But they, they believe that. And then so I went back to the
hotel, turn on the telly. The first person I saw was
fucking Piers Morgan. But it's the only person that
was being shown on North Korean TV.
So he's big on North. Korea.
No. It was just some weird thing
they were showing where he was on it.
I couldn't believe it. How has Piers Morgan become
arguably one of the biggest names in broadcasting globally?
Well, how's he from CNN? How's he not in prison?
Yeah, well, he's not on the list, he said.
He was only he was only met her at A at a book launch.
Yeah, but I mean, clearly all the, you know, like, how can you
edit a national newspaper and not know that people were
hacking stuff? Yeah, I mean, it's impossible.
Oh, with a phone hacking scandal?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I didn't mean anything
else. I don't know.
That, but he's the, well, that hate.
I don't know if I should use this as a reference because I'm
just standing. I'm standing.
Nigel Farage. Yeah.
My reference is who at the time of going back to the London
riots, his references were Andrew Tate.
Yeah, for there you go. For what where these this
immigrant was from? Well, according to Lady Lady
Victoria Hervey, if you're not in the Epstein files, you're a
loser. You exactly.
So I've asked you in them. I've asked my agent to get me on
them. Really I'm I'm trying to get a
booking. You can't.
It's a full.
Have you looked it up? It's completely full, Yeah.
Have you looked it up? Yeah.
And you're not in them. No, yeah, I, I don't think I
was. I'm not as successful as you,
Dom. I'm definitely not in them.
Well, I actually haven't let me out, but it's not a chance and
you're way more successful. I have had Michelle de Swartz on
the podcast which was released today and she was rejected.
Was a model. They asked they they there was a
line up of women and in London he came to pick out a few
models. Who did Epstein?
Epstein. Really.
Yeah, and he said yes, yes, yes, yes.
No, not that one. Yes, yes.
Too old. She's well, she's 14, half
black. Oh, really?
He was a racist. Really.
It wasn't black women. Jesus.
It's terrible. Yeah, it's a terrible one.
Forget the paedophilia. Yeah, the racism.
Just the racist. Oh, obviously we grew up in a
time with when Jimmy Savile was our children's presenters and
Rolf Harris. This is.
Yeah, but that was but you. Weren't here at the time.
Yeah, I was here. But you came back to England by
then. I.
Was at boarding school, then watched.
Oh, you were boarding school? Yeah.
So I was just watching these in plain sight.
Predators, basically. It was just extraordinary.
He wasn't hiding, was he? That wasn't hiding.
The travel suits were will give way and everything about it.
And and the buses. And the voluntary work in in
children's hospitals. It's incredible what we live
through, isn't it? If you weren't molested from our
generation, it was a miracle. I often wonder whether I was
molested and I blocked it out, but I don't think I was.
It was incredible. I mean, my my prep school, which
is, you know, where all that kind of stuff happens.
I used to get letters, about four letters when I was at my
next school from people going, oh, I don't know if you Remember
Me, but I was in your year and I've just, you know, either
remembered or, you know, it's happened.
And I was molested and I'm trying to take a class action.
Were you molested? And I was like, don't think so.
So I think I was just deeply unattractive as a child.
I think that's no. I wouldn't say.
That no, I was. Otherwise why not?
I wouldn't they. Left me alone.
I wouldn't say you were attractive either, but I
wouldn't. There you go.
But you know. You come across as someone who
was very cute as because, you know, very bubbly and cute as a
child. Bubbly.
Yeah, I'm certainly not bubbly. Yeah, I would say I.
Was a very unpleasant child, I really was.
Because you know, when, when we were growing up of the earth
from the days of the savils and the there was, they were
protected as they are probably now.
Those are the days, yeah. And also.
Serials really protected their paedophiles.
Yeah, but the serial killing was a thing.
Serial. Killing was big for a while.
Serial killing's gone off the boil a bit.
Hasn't. It it's probably because of the
CCT. It's much easier to be a serial
killer back then, you know, like the the biggest, who was the
biggest in America at the time? Well, Bundy.
I'm a Bundy fan. Ted Bundy.
Ted Bundy was the good looking one in a in a Beatles, folks.
You know, I I but but I thought Bundy didn't kill as many as the
the guy was killing the old people.
Oh, if you're going for numbers, yeah, Ed gain was probably Ed
gain. Ed Gain was probably the big
one, but. Obviously that was started off
in the 50s and 60s. Yeah, I think 50s and 60s were
the sort of dream years. Because there's no CCTV.
There's no CCTV and you just, you're an adult.
So if anyone tells you, you just say no.
Yeah, yeah, it was easy. It was great.
I mean, really, I often think I wish I was back in the 50s and I
could really take up serial killing properly.
But, well, you can't travel in time like that.
Also you get a Netflix special, you would get your own series.
Yeah, you get a pre net, you'd get a prequel.
Which would be pretty cool. You'd get document.
I I, I was trying to do a joke. I said, you know, Ed Gein, Rolf
Harris and sort of Jimmy Savile, Ed Gein, John Wayne Gacy.
Oh yeah, the clown. Have all got Netflix specials
and I haven't. No, that's true.
What do I have to do? You have to kill more.
But you can't. I was born in the wrong era.
Well just kill more but in an area with no CCTV that's.
There aren't any. Scotland has no CCTV, it's
illegal. Oh, really?
Yeah, it's it's illegal. I didn't know this.
Yeah, there's no cameras in Scotland.
That's why you don't see any Scots end of a.
I didn't know this but also Scots don't have still don't
have serial killers so it's not as fashionable as it used.
To be they must Well, they do have serial killers, but because
they don't have CCTV, no one's. Caught them.
See, Ted Bundy defended himself. He was his downfall.
Yeah, he did. He was so smug, that man.
He was. Incredible.
He was so arrogant. He took a sorority out one
night, like he killed I think 6 people in one night.
So he was a greedy serial killer, because a lot of them
tell you. The one that's the big one is,
is BTK, Bind Torture Kill. That was his nickname.
I don't know how we got on to this, but it's an area of
speciality for me. And also the devil worshipper.
Oh, who is? The really bad one.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who looked like the devil?
When his name was. The Strangler, the The Night.
The Night Stalker. The Night Stalker.
Terrible name. That glamorized him.
You see this is the problem. But also it sounded like a bad
Metallica album. I tell like a great, great band,
but the Night Stalker, whose name was Richard Ramirez.
Very good. That's fuck.
OK, that's really impressive. Richard Ramirez taking the upper
level there. Yeah, without even Googling
I've. Seen that twice and I couldn't
remember his name. Yeah, that's because I'm racist.
I don't know Hispanic names. And he was, he was a disgusting
human being. All four on every level.
Bad, bad hygiene on every level. And a granny rapper.
And a. Yeah, which I don't know is why
that's worse, but. Break into homes and when he was
on trial marrying. Him.
Offering him. What is that about marriage
proposals? So that's not only could you be
a serial killer, but you'd be much more successful with women.
I never used to get women. Until you serial.
Kill until What do you have to do to get women?
Who do I have to kill around here to get away?
With and Ted Bundy. What Ted Bundy was.
It was good. Looking basically good looking I
think and he used to wear Lacoste shirts.
Piece of shit, but yeah, exactly.
A total piece of shit. But yeah, I don't think that's
controversial to say. No, I'm I'm sure I'll get stick
for this is the world you you'll get.
Stick you'll get. Oh, really?
Why? Because he's white.
Yeah, you are now Ted Bundy. Yeah, look at you.
Yeah, you're not fit to wear his dead shoes and you're not fit to
wear his skin. Well, just a week ago, Ed Gein.
Ed Gein Ed Gein was one of the biggest inspirations to horror
films around the world from The Leather.
Face if you ever. Want to wear Silence of the
Lambs, Ed Gein and Texas Chainsaw?
Obviously because he apparently never used a chainsaw that was
made-up. It was the Leatherface bit that
he did because he used. To wear in the in the the film
made-up the chainsaw. Yeah, they made-up.
That's because. The Texas Leatherface massacre
wouldn't be as good. And the director of the Texas
Chainsaw Massacre was? I'm not a geek so no idea.
I'm going very geek, do you know?
Yeah, I do know. Wait that.
Was. No idea.
Yeah. This has turned into an episode
of The Chase. Yeah, it is the chase.
Tobe Hooper Tobe Hooper who recently died.
Well, he just looked that up for.
You. Yeah, he did.
I did remember his name, Tobe Hooper, The Texas Chainsaw
Massacre, but it's all revolving around that.
Then then you've got obviously things like an Eye on Elm
Street, which is another basically a paedo.
It's masks, yeah. Masks was the one I didn't like.
Halloween was the one. Halloween.
Another mask. Yeah, yeah.
But babysitters, basically, the rules aren't the the moment they
have sex, they're killed. It's that kind of stuff.
They were like moralistic horrors.
Yeah, I don't like horror films. Well, I grew up to Hammer horror
films. Yeah, that kind of camp.
Yeah, yeah, I just rewatched the the remake of Dracula, actually.
It's just they say it's a love story.
It's not even a horror film. I'm generally not into horror
films. What are your what's your genre
Documentaries. Yeah, me too.
I'm obsessed with documentaries. What would you every level.
Yeah, yeah, it was lost. Well, I re I just re watched Man
on Wire, which is one of the greatest about the Frenchman
that walked across twin towers. I watched, I watched a six part
series on the Roosevelts, Teddy, FDR and Eleanor, which I think
is the greatest thing I've ever seen.
I watched a lot of stuff about Vietnam.
I just watched 3 parters just come out on the Murdochs.
I do nothing, just come out. Yeah, yeah, I watched nothing
but documentaries. Yeah, the Murdochs looks like a
good. One, it's really good and
basically it tells you that every rich family or dynasty has
the same thing. You have a founder, then you
have the the heir who basically makes it massive and then you
have the children, the third generation children who fuck it
all up. That's where we're at the.
Well, the Maxwells. Well, the Maxwells, indeed.
Yeah, well, she's, she went. She went a bit further, I
thought. She went full.
Till she definitely, because she didn't, you know, she didn't
just fuck up their family fortune, but she did something
of her own, which I think is important, you know.
You know, I still put money into pensions, which I I always,
always get dubious about when I think of Robert Maxwell.
Well, yeah, I don't have a pension that I'm financially
responsible. So I'm hoping that that's, I'm
hoping your pension gets robbed so I'm OK.
Because you don't need a pension.
I certainly need a pension. I'm totally broke.
Come on, man. Oh, totally from the from the
trigger. Happier TV dead this is. 25
years ago. I know it's it's you've spent a
lot and and you've got 2 wonderful children.
I've got 2. Kids, yeah, they had two kids so
they're expensive and one went they.
Were they were really expensive. They both went to private
school. I don't know why.
Again, it's that sex abuse thing.
I've no idea why I sent them to why I sent them to private
school. My wife's Canadian and she's
just like, why are we like mortgaging ourselves to the hilt
to send these people to places where they'll become entitled
little shits? And I go, I don't know, my dad
did it and that's genuinely what what happened.
I went to public school, you see.
Did you? Yeah.
Rough. Very rough was.
Proper rough back in the 70s you.
Mean public as in private. No, as in public as in state.
School. Are you in state school?
Yeah, yeah. Well, I mean and.
It was rough, not really looking really.
You look all right. I think I would have done better
if I went to private school. Yeah, also you'd have learnt how
to run India, which is very. Easy, I would have learnt how to
run India. Yeah, which might be more useful
for you than me I. Would have been much more
useful. If I went back, could have gone
into politics. In fact, if I go back and you go
back, you'd probably be more Indian.
Than I am, yeah, probably. You see, this is the thing
people say, Oh, have you been back?
Been I was born here. Back I fucking run the place.
And then you went to the London School of Oriental and African
Studies, where you did politics. Yeah, where I really wanted to
just refine what it was I was going to do with India.
Yeah, yeah, I did go there. That was that was a really SOAS,
SOAS. It was a really weird place.
So basically you have to speak about 50 languages to get a
drink at the bar. There was a 3D mural in the bar
representing AIDS, which was cheery.
And it was basically the only place apart from Moxon,
Cambridge, where MI six came in to recruit.
And actually I did a joke and trig happy because of that.
I went back after when I left SOAS dressed in a blazer and
stuff and I've stopped this Japanese girl going down the
corridor and I said I represent the intelligence services and
I'm wondering whether you thought about what you're doing
when you leave. And she goes, Oh yes, I'm very
sporty. And I said great, well, it'll
involve me putting you in a job somewhere you can get on with it
normally, but then one day you'll get a phone call and you
might have to either kill someone or do some sexual
activity because absolutely. I'm really, I've actually
applied for the Foreign Office. So I said great, well, if you
just here's my card and just leave a message saying mugwaffin
and we'll be back in touch. And our answering machine in the
office, she left about 40 messages saying mugwaffin,
mugwaffin. And I always wondered what
happened to her. And then the other day I was
doing a gig in Cheltenham and her brother turns up and said
she's still scarred by it to this.
Stay the trauma you've caused, but then you just go into
politics to some degree, didn't you?
You went into Yeah, I. Never went into politics.
I'm, I'm really interested in politics, but I'm not political.
I love politics, but I don't, I know what's wrong, but I don't
know what's right. So I was, I became a diplomat in
Prague and then I worked in, in the House of Commons for about
two years. So I got fired.
Is it true that you kicked football into David Mellor's
face? No, but I was doing an interview
with David Mellor and people I'd set up in the background, kick
the football and they were supposed to kick it to me and I
was kick it back and he went smacked into his face, broke his
glasses. And I just thought that's what
the people of Britain want and ITN did as well because they put
it out and then they rose that it had been sort of set up and I
was fired. Yeah.
So David Mellor is essentially responsible for Trigger Happy?
TV is that prior to the toe sucking scandal?
Yeah, Yeah, it was. Yeah, just before actually.
So that was that was the heyday. 9596 something like.
That should we just refresh the listeners?
Because a lot of these listeners aren't gonna.
No, they've no idea who I am, Robert.
Mack. Well, not not you.
I'm talking about David Mellor. So David Mellor was if you if
you went into AI and asked AI to very good looking man, yeah, to
design Billy Bunter dressed as a Tory cabinet member and then
make him look more ugly, you'd get David Mellor.
And he had an affair with a woman called and Tony de Sanchez
and and then Max Clifford, who was this guy, that publicist, He
basically thought that's not a good enough story.
So he claimed that she that David Mellor would only shag
Antonio de Sancho while dressed in a Chelsea football shirt.
Who was a very good looking woman.
She was a good looking woman, was strong, I'd say a handsome
woman. She looked like a horse, but in
a good way. Yeah, and I like a horse.
I like a nose. So she was like a Spanish
beauty. She looked like saying Picasso
might have painted just after his Cubist period.
He's on LBC now and again. Is he?
Yeah. He gets asked to do little bits
and pieces. I don't care.
TV or some shit? He's a fucking moron.
Talk TV one of the what a scumbag of a station that is.
It's about as bad as it gets. Bad as that they I did a
routine. There was an outtake from Live
in It where I spoke about the the racism of talk TV.
No, I wouldn't because you're talking about what was I on?
I was on. I've been on talk.
I've been asked to do interviews.
You've done GB news. No, I never got asked.
Yeah, I think when it was launched they are offered me a
show. Did they?
Yeah, when it was launched. To see you on that.
Yeah, and I you'd. Have probably, I thought, hang
on, we got the right chaudry. Yeah, I.
Think they wanted Anjem Chair? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Another obscure reference. I'm I'm aware of him there.
Yeah, you're aware who's I think he's doing about 30 years.
And I think he's doing 24 years. 24 He left, He's done 6.
He's Yeah, he's got. He's all right.
We're safe for a bit, Uncle. But I was talking about the
Second World War and and the reference to cockroaches in
Bangladesh. But I talked about Churchill's.
Racism. What did he describe?
Bangladeshi's. Cockroaches Great famine was.
The Famine, the. Famine.
I didn't. Know you described him as
cockroaches. I think he's.
Can we get the exact quote? Well.
Look, it wouldn't. Yeah, I mean, he was definitely.
Not and I just talked about him being a racist.
He wasn't woke, was he? Church?
That's why he's a great British, British.
British don't. Even think they were the word
woke existed in the no in the in the 50s and.
But that's that's why country's fucked now, yeah, it's all gone
woke. What was the exact quote?
Can we just get the exact quote from?
I'm not sure if I can find one about Bangladeshis but they say
he's. I know for a fact Churchill has
said things referring to Indians.
Well, I know he said Indians, but I didn't know cockroaches.
I'm not sure if I can find that. Do facts matter?
Do no, they don't matter. I think they do.
It says the. Facts don't matter, it's your
truth. Exactly.
It's my truth, your truth. We've all got truth.
Yeah. So your first job was as as a
diplomat as you mentioned in Prague?
Well, my first job was actually in the newspaper stand outside
Holland Park Ave. Tube.
Holland Park Tube station. Oh, really?
Yeah, but that's quite posh. Holland Park, yeah.
Holland Park is, but I was selling newspapers in a booth,
so it's sort of 5050. So when you were fired from ITN,
Yeah, for inviting your friends to come along the muck muck
about, What was that like at the time?
I think I'd realized at that stage because I really loved
being in the thick of it like I was, you know, in Parliament.
I had a pass. I, I went to Downing St. like it
was pretty amazing to be all that.
But I also thought this is not for me.
Like I could see people that were just going to make this
their life career and I just couldn't.
And so it's quite a relief when I got fired because it forced me
to go and do something else. And I ended up working for a guy
called Mark Thomas who's a stand up.
And brilliant stand up. You were in the comedy pod.
Product. He did it.
Yeah, he did a show called Mark Thomas Comedy Present.
You're a researcher on that I. Was a researcher on that on the
very first day, first thing we filmed was to see what things we
could take through a McDonald's drive through.
So we took like a tank, a clown car, a hamburger thing.
I just remember thinking, this is insane that they're paying me
to do this. I'd do it for free and that's
why I wrote it. I just like asking about.
And then Russell Brand did a very similar thing on his
Channel 4. Did he?
Yeah. You know I.
Didn't care about Russell. Brand I started off with.
Did you? What do you mean you started off
with him? And stand up with sex pesting.
I started off with the I've never.
Met him but I'm not a fan. Yeah, because comedy is all very
subjective, isn't it? Yeah, I don't care about his
comedy. I just his, his his.
Oh, sorry. His human behaviour.
Yeah, yeah, the human behaviour. Yeah, his comedy was all right,
but do you? Mix the person with the artist
you see. No, I don't.
Not always, No, not at all. If he wasn't listening to any
music, could. I the allegations weren't there,
would you have been a fan? No, not Michael Jackson.
The allegations were there, but people still listened to the
music. Yeah, in both cases I wouldn't.
Yeah, but not. But yeah.
So no, it is right. I admired his.
He had a style, didn't he? But not for me.
Because I still, I still listen to Gary Glitter music, for
example, because the music was great.
Yeah, the music was great. Yeah, I don't really listen to
Gary Glitter. I don't.
I'm just saying.
That I didn't really did. Even though they did use it in
the film The Joker. I mean, David Bowie, I've never
seen the Joker. I don't like those sort of
films. I don't like.
I don't. I just, I really hate Marvel
fucking. It's just that all these films
we made for 12 year olds, it's like we never grew up.
I've never seen Star Wars. It's all that kind of stuff.
It's like. Why I saw the early ones.
No, I've never seen. It you never saw the other.
Ones I don't want to either. It's become my thing now as well
so it's an awkward. It must have been difficult with
the. Kids.
No, no, not really. My kids are kind of cool.
When they were young. No, didn't want to.
Yeah. So what did you you show them?
Documentaries. Hardly.
You showed them documentaries on the Roosevelt.
They loved it. Daddy, what we're watching
tonight. The on the massacre at Male in
Vietnam was their real favorite. We'd watch that over and over
again. They still don't know what the
Vietnam War was about, do they? Who?
My kids. Yeah.
No, not just the kids, but are they American?
I think it's called the domino. They are actually American, are
they? Well, they're Canadian Canadian,
but my wife was born in America, so it's sort of technical.
It was the IT the Vietnam War was because of the domino.
Theory. Domino theory, Yeah, which just
to refresh the memory of my audience, the domino.
The domino theory was basically the idea that you had the Cold
War and you had communist back countries and democratically
back countries, and the idea that they worried that if one
country fell to communism that they'd all fall like dominoes.
So the idea was they had to stop Vietnam from going communist,
otherwise the whole of Southeast Asia went, yeah, that was
clearly bollocks. But the one good thing about
Americans is they learn from history.
Exactly. And so you won't see Trump like
putting boots on the ground in Iran or anything.
Why would he No Do you think the.
Time has gone out. It's probably nuke terrorism.
Yeah, we're probably all dead by the.
Time this goes. Out Do you think we now live in
a totalitarian regime under Marxist rule?
No, I don't. Well, that's my phone.
Where's that going? That's probably do hello or
something amusing. That's probably someone telling
you not to talk about. This.
Yeah, I can't. I can't actually talk.
You can't mention have have you? Have you bugged this?
Am I what? Have you bugged the studio?
No, I haven't. Because you know when like, hey,
Jess, Dick, Doggy or someone was being interviewed, I.
Love that. Yeah, but but that was really
interesting. They did their own version but.
Because of my, I mean, I'm slightly annoyed at my
algorithm, but I actually was aware of HS tick tick because
you know your, your algorithm, you assume that everyone else is
seeing the same thing as you are.
And so weirdly, because I kind of go on and fight people
online, my algorithm is full of Dubai influencers, really funny
and sweet dogs and HS tick tocky types.
And so I was really aware of him.
So I saw the live stuff when Louis Theroux was on.
And. I thought, well, this is quite
smart because actually as good as Louis Theroux is, a lot of it
is in the edit. That's why he always leaves
those long pauses. And so actually it will be
interesting to see his version against the Louis Theroux edited
one. But the first thing I realized,
HS TikTok is too cheap and dull to actually edit it himself,
which he won't. He just puts it out as a stream.
But actually what was interesting is then Louis
Theroux saw he'd done that. So I had to counter it in the
edit and he sort of came back with him watching his mum clean
or whatever I thought it was. It was a battle of cultures.
It was great. My favorite moment, that whole
manosphere thing though, was the bit where he's talking to camera
and Louis Theroux is just like, who the fuck are you talking to?
That was old V new. That's a great example of
postmodern. Postmodern meta revival system.
Metaphysics really. And as you state there, the the
long pause is is a very journalistic trick.
And it's brilliant because if you're awkward you basically
just let people Stew and if you can't stand silences then you
just in the end fill it with nonsense.
Luckily I love silence so you wouldn't tell so far, but I do.
So what the you see what I did there?
Yeah, I did see. Did you see how I knew it was
coming as well? But what's good?
Is it on a on a radio? But the producer didn't didn't
see it, no. He panicked, he got really
worried. I could see that.
On a. Radio show, because you've done
radio, it's they have that thing where if there's silence more
than I think it's 8 seconds, it cuts into an emergency
broadcast. So I always used to see how far
he could, you know, like skate to the edge, watch the producers
die. It's great, isn't?
It that was really good. I love it, but it's dead air.
Isn't it dead air? I think it's really nerve
racking. People think what's happened
here. If this was radio, we would have
gone to commercial. Break.
Yeah, that's right. Yeah.
And we'd be given a stiff talking to.
It would have. Been you wasted 5 seconds of
listening to what a racist cab driver from Brighton thought
about Bosnia. It would have been as
uncomfortable. I do find that uncomfortable,
though. You did.
Yeah. Because I thought, right.
I'm really. I'm going to just.
I'm going to to hold this out, but what if you do?
What if we're both really stubborn?
Like I haven't got 40 minutes, but I have actually but to sit
around in silence. But I've actually watched that
podcast. We've got to put that as a clip.
Hope you're enjoying this podcast.
Just a quick reminder, this show is brought to you by Mrs.
Ellswood Pickles. Bringing punch to your podcast
and crunch to your lunch and This is Elswood are packed with
freshness every time. So I just watched with Neil Nye,
great and with which I love. But with Neil Nye, there's a
moment they drive back to London and they drive through Notting
Hill, Portobello, Paddington. And that is just mind blowing
because you you think it's not that not that long ago when they
filmed it, but just the change is insane.
Oh yeah, there's some interest. It's full of brands now.
I mean, architecturally, obviously architecturally the,
the, the streets have become very different.
But most of this, the property in London, which is, you know,
in, in the Knightsbridge and, and the surrounding areas, well,
they're all rented because a lot of the, the Brits have moved
out, that's right, to bigger places and then rented them out.
So it's of it's the fault of the rich.
Yeah, it's the rich and the Brits.
It's your fault. But it's mainly the
concentration of ethnicity, so to speak, are within major
cities within. Yeah, countries, yeah, I was
again discussing this. I think you wouldn't be
surprised to hear on the right wing podcast I was just on and
it was something like 6% of Britain is Muslim.
But he goes yeah, but in the cities it's way more they're
they're clustered. So yeah.
I was doing a bits on stand up about it, but I think 90% is
still white, yeah. Yeah, but that's you.
Know we've got a lot of. Work to do.
It's not enough, is it? You're you're doing that praying
in dominant ways. Yeah, the praying, yeah, I'm
not, I'm not a Muslim, but a lot of.
How would I fucking know? If you're a cast port, you're a
Muslim. Casting directors, Yeah.
If you are, are you acting these days or?
I've never acted. No one's ever asked me.
Really. Yeah.
I've never seen the. I've never really wanted to be
an actor. Because you do almost
everything. Well, I do way too much of
everything and and of nothing really.
ABC, you're a stand up speaker. Because I'm just desperately
trying to stay employed. The thing I really think I'm
good at, apart from, you know, like trigger happy type stuff is
books. Like I've written 10 books and
my books are genuinely good, like really good.
I agree. And I would stand up with those.
My travel books anyway. When I say travel books, I'm not
writing rough guides. I'm writing, you know, I go off
and just travel. So I'm I'm really pleased with
those. But apart from that, it's just
survival. Yeah, I mean, as I said, trigger
happy TVI grew up to obviously Beatles about Jesus.
Jeremy Beatles about is the reason I made Trigger happy
because I hated it so much. Yeah, and I remember you make a
reference to Jeremy Beatle. Jesus Christ, I saw.
I met him once. I actually felt really bad
because you know, he had a withered hand if you know that.
And he he was, it was in the Flask, which is a pub in
Highgate. And it was the height of Beatles
about and somewhere or game for a laugh or whatever.
And he walks in and he gets around and he's holding all
these drinks and some fucking twat goes, you Jeremy Beadle, He
goes. Yeah, he goes.
You go for a laugh and he goes. And he just threw a pint in his
face, really. And I just remember thinking,
fuck, you know, it would be on telly.
And then four years later, hello, It's Mr. Snail.
You know, that's gross. So I did feel bad for him.
Quite an odd man, Beadle, I think.
I don't really know enough about him, but I'm not interested
enough to find out. He died very young, didn't he?
Yeah, he did. Yeah.
That that was the day of ITV daytime.
ITV Saturday nights he was on. He was Saturday nights. 30
million viewers. It's just insane, yeah. 30
million I know now TV show I think SNL was broadcast on the
weekend. I just saw that new SNL, they
were really excited. It was 220,000 viewers, viewers
Eli, and that's massive. I know that's ridiculous.
That's the biggest. We got 7 million with trigger
appy. 7 million you were getting.
And that was a cult show on on channel.
And that was a small show, Yeah, because it was late.
Yeah, well, 10:30, yeah. 10/30 it was late.
Yeah, yeah, I had the same slot when I hosted Stand Up for the
Week. I love Stand Up for the Week.
And did you enjoy that? Well, it's not on anymore.
No, no, that's what I'm doing now.
Yeah, that's why I haven't been with Velvet too.
We don't want to do TV anymore. No one does.
Who does this too? It's not cool enough.
Yeah, it's not cool here. You've got to be on online.
I get people saying to me, this everything's going, God, why
don't you just do another TV show?
You go, yeah, I just can't be arsed.
That's like that's like you can just flick your thing and go
make ATV show. It's crazy.
We could just say something now as controversial.
You, you, you can't. Good old days mate.
You could joke about it and if you can't do it now, can you
mate? Just.
Because of the wokes. So I don't do TV because it's
too woke and I like just coming on and just being able to abuse
anyone I want. That's what I like.
It's the freedom to say it into a vacuum.
Obviously, everyone we've made reference to today has to go
past lawyers, commissioning editors, producers, executive
producers. Yeah.
And only then will I broadcast what you've said.
Earlier, of course, and I'd expect nothing less and.
In 2010, you did. I'm A Celebrity.
Get Me Out of here. Yeah, real highlight.
Which some say is the was the pinnacle.
I'd say it was the pinnacle. It was my pinnacle.
It was certainly the best. I'm a celeb because I've
watched, I've watched lots, you know, because I like
documentaries. I watched a lot of reality and I
genuinely. Liked watching.
That was the peak of the show at the.
Yes, I think it was, well, particularly that year, because
every year before that there had been someone on that I would
have murdered. But that year was fucking
insane. We had everything I had Britt
Eckland. I mean, just on our own, you
know, Rod Stewart, Peter Sellers, I didn't have much to
say, but still was Brit Eklund had, Nigel Havers did.
You say Peter Sellers was on it. No, but she was married to Peter
Sellers. She was married.
How cool is that? Yeah, exactly.
And then? Used to beat the shit out of her
children. Yeah, Peter Sellers would have
been really good but unfortunately not available.
Nigel Havers, a man who came onto the show Producer's dream,
had came onto the show but had no idea what it was, so just
constantly looking around in panic.
I had Sean Ryder, fucking amazing.
I love Sean Ryder, who's brilliant.
Jenny Eclair became my first and only comedian friend.
I really like Jenny. Very funny.
Stacey Solomon was on and we just knew she was going to win.
So that took the pressure off the competitors.
And then we had some random fuckwits like Lembit OPEC, you
remember him? I mean, there was no, there was
no Deadwood there at all. And then Alison fucking Hammond.
Hammond was on it. I mean, she was like an also
ran, but that now look at her. So yeah, it was great.
And Lembit was going out with one of the cheeky girls.
Both cheeky girls, both at the same time.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. God, he's a fucking weirdo.
He thought he believes that the Earth's impossible.
They were about to be killed, destroyed by an asteroid, but
that bothered him while we were in the jungle.
I don't know. I think it's unlikely it's going
to happen in the 20 days or the four days that you're going to
be in here, so it's fine. So yes, I was on I'm A
Celebrity, but I've also done, you know, I had a period of
doing all the reality shows because I genuinely like
watching reality shows. And also I think stand ups maybe
don't like reality shows. Certainly Jenny Eclair didn't
enjoy I'm a Celeb because she's used to, you know, she likes
being funny and she is very funny and I love Jenny, but
she's used to being in a controlled environment, which is
what stand up is. And my environment isn't
uncontrolled. I like chaos and I like riffing
stuff. So I if anything I'm I'm I kind
of I think I'm slightly better equipped for reality shows.
So I really enjoyed I'm a Celeb, but I've done some shit ones as
well. Fuck me.
I did one called Splash Player where supposedly that what's his
name? That was a.
Swimming was that Tom Daley teaches you to high dive.
Yeah, Now I jump off cliffs. I do that a lot.
I really like it. And but I never dive.
I'm always jumping. So I thought this is amazing.
Tom Daley is going to teach me, do a flip.
And next time I'm on the summer in Canada and I'm on the Cliff
and they're all these like cocky kids, I'll do a triple Pike or
whatever. It'd be great.
Tom Daley turned up once. That was it.
And then for the rest of the time you're just stuck in Essex,
wherever this high diving place was.
And weirdly, another person doing it with me was Joey Essex.
And my high point on it, I swear he got stuck in a in a cubicle,
in a toilet cubicle because he couldn't work.
I had to pull the door rather than push it.
And that was a major crisis in his life.
That was the whole thing was a fucking nightmare.
And I ended up losing control in the middle of the air and
landing on my back in front of my family.
It was that was not good at all. I've had a lot of things like.
That any damage? Yeah, just terrible, terrible
pain and bruising for like 5 days.
When I did that and I jumped off of this big kind of plank when
we were re enacting the stunts from Die Hard.
Oh yeah. And then you land on a crash
map. OK, But when it's from.
Yeah, yeah, it's 80 feet. Yeah, you get.
What are we doing that for? It was a Sky TV show for
Christmas, a few Christmas called reenactments.
Yeah, it was like it was reenacting.
That's good. All the stunts from.
And then you did Bear Grills. Called Cunning Stunts.
Yeah, it was. Called It was.
Called Die Hard with a Vengeance or some shit.
I did do Bear Grills. Bear Grills was the hardest core
thing I've ever done. It was like it was my own
personal Guantanamo. Yeah, I wonder what Guantanamo
water boarding was where that. I'm surprised they didn't add
that as a as a sort of bonus. Well splash water board it's.
Splash, I was water board itself.
Water Board. Which you called.
Homoerotic. Homoerotic.
What did I call homoerotic? Splash.
Well, it was very homoerotic, was it?
I thought, not for me and not for anyone watching me.
But yeah, the whole thing, I sort of thought it was going to
be quite physical, but actually the whole thing was like a a
very camp experience. Everything, the type budgie
smugglers, that sort of audience of mainly men staring at men in
budgie smugglers. I mean, nothing wrong with that,
but it's just it was very odd. And then this kind of these sort
of weird thickos from TOWIE wandering around, you know,
trying to do push, pull doors, it was all very odd.
Yeah, I made a cameo appearance in that one year.
Did you? Yeah, in TOWIE.
And how did that go? Oh, you know, it's TOWIE.
Yeah, it's real. That's The thing is it is real.
It's. Definitely not scripted.
Yeah, it's not scripted, no. I don't know.
Those guys could act. No, they couldn't.
Nepotism. That's fine.
It's fine. There was.
I can't remember the names of the people on the island, but
they can't. Remember, they don't even know
if it's still on anymore. Tawie is it?
I don't think that Tawie, Tawie's not on, is it?
And Chelsea? Chelsea is Chelsea's still on.
Oh yeah, I think Chelsea is. Well, I keep seeing ads for it.
Yeah, I'm watching Married at First Sight Australia at the
moment. Have you ever seen that?
Well, you're basically an arranged marriage.
I used to. Yeah, it is an arranged
marriage. Yeah.
Have you ever watched it? I've never seen it, but I.
I'm quite fascinated by it because it's it's got like a
massive, you know, it's shown it.
They have married at first sight, Britain married at first
sight everywhere. But for some reason the
Australian one is the gold and normally the Australian version
of a reality show is not the one that wins.
But I love it. Got nowhere more to go with that
you. Had an arranged marriage, right?
Yes, I did, yeah. I did.
How did that happen? Well, I got, I'd, I'd found it
very difficult to find a girlfriend for 3-4 years.
And my parents met this couple in Canada.
They were on a caravan holiday in Canada who had a daughter who
was aging and had not married. And so they introduced us and it
was set up and it's been very successful.
We've been together 25 years. So actually, you know, I was
very anti. Mashallah, Yeah, indeed.
And when they unveiled you were now wife?
Yeah. What were your first?
Not the best. I'll be honest, but I was, I was
in for the ride, you know, so to speak, Yeah.
What did you think about you then?
What? What did she?
Oh, she was quite thrilled, I could see that.
But she's 22 years older than me, so really.
Yeah, so it was. You're being serious right now.
Yeah. Yeah.
Your wife's 22 years older. Why?
It's it's not because you've done well, mate.
Yeah, I've done fucking. And two kids.
Yeah, yeah.
What a miracle. Not mine, obviously, but yeah.
Yeah, so we've, we've actually covered the books quite well in
your your travel documentaries, including North Korea, Iran,
Russia, Chernobyl, Lebanon, Mexico, Australia, India,
Cambodia and most of the American states.
All the Americans. Have I missed any out there?
Oh yeah, you've missed. Well, I've done 108 countries.
You're not into all of them. Yeah, well, Congo, that's a.
Congo is a good one. Isn't it?
That's a good one. That was very frightening.
Yeah, it's a lot of militia there the.
Thing I liked most about Congo was it's Belgian Congo and
obviously I grew up on Tintin, reading Tintin.
That's why I love travelling. Racist show that was.
Yeah, it. Was and Tintin in Congo is like
probably the most racist book I've ever read in my life.
So when I was like telling my kids my love for Tintin, you
suddenly get to Tintin in the Congo and you realise how
problematic that is. So when I went to the Congo, I
assumed Tintin being the most visible Belgian, they know
they'd fucking hate him. They didn't.
They have a day once a year where all Congolese dress up as
Tintin. It's absolutely mental, sorry,
neurodivergent, and it's fantastic.
So that was really good. And also the biggest lie we were
told about the Congo, you'll know at your age is obviously on
Bongo. You saw those ads from Bongo and
Bongo? Yeah, on Bongo and Bongo, they
drink it in the Congo. Went to six supermarkets, asked
in each one, could I have an on Bongo, please?
Fuck all. Didn't know it's.
A total lie. Yeah.
That was a racist ad, but it was a.
Lie. Incorrect.
Yeah, it's going to be racist. At least be factual.
Exactly, but that's the point. I wouldn't mind if it was racist
if I could have got myself an A mongo.
But obviously that places like the Congo was seen to the
western world as no go areas. Yeah, that's why I like going.
Which they now refer to parts of England as.
As no goes, well, London is a no go.
They're saying it's some. Part in London today and I'm, I
mean, what is it? It's about 4:00 in the
afternoon. I'm astonished I haven't been
stabbed twice. I'm astonished you got through
the militia to get to the studio this evening.
So I was in London last week and I was murdered twice, which was
just weird because that never used to happen.
Once more than I got murdered last week, Did you?
We've done well, but obviously a lot of the militia are friends
of mine. But it never used to happen.
You need to know the right militia anyways to jolly.
Which is and Middleton will change all this.
A lot of people ask me though from Dubai.
Well, they don't ask me. What were you christened?
What was that christened? What?
Were you jolly? No, actually my best review
ever. My only review.
Don Jolly man or anagram. My real name is Dominic John
Romulus. Jolly Romulus is because I was
conceived in Rome. But I'm honestly like you don't
think I'm going to set myself up as a comedian, call myself Mr.
Jolly. It's like Mr. Tickle was taken.
So I'll go with Jolly. It's a great name though.
What? Jolly.
Yeah, it's a fucking awful funny man.
Oh, it's not funny in the time it makes you know how many
fucking people just go? Not very jolly, are you?
Oh, Jesus. My full name is Taj Ball, the
Singh draw the day. Yeah, it rolls off the tongue.
It's yeah. It's very easy to pronounce.
It's good. So that's worked for you I
think. Well, Paul Chowdhry.
Yeah. Paul.
Yeah. This is when my dad took me to
school for the first time. What's your name?
Yeah, it's Taj. Paul.
Can I just call him Paul? Call him Kev, yeah.
Call him David. Yeah, well, Tom, Jonny's easy.
It's just like simple. But your dad actually ran an
import export business from. No, it's so funny.
Every time I do interviews, everyone says different things
that he either ran a shipping magnate agency, he's a shipping
agent a. Shipping Agent.
Which is just so dull. I think it just, I mean I
genuinely don't know. My sister runs it now in Beirut,
but they just basically when a big ship comes in, they offload
it and unload it I think. And then your mum worked for the
Foreign Office and then. My mum worked for our office and
then as a prostitute briefly and then yeah, that was it.
And then the inspiration. For for trigger happy came from
a sort of meshing of those things.
And Mona Lisa in prostitution and the film Mona Lisa.
And the film mainly based on on my life.
Yeah, yeah. On your mother.
Yes, extraordinary. You see now, if you were Piers
Morgan, yeah, you would have walked off at that point.
Yeah. Which is why I know.
What is that about? I mean, I've been, I've told you
this before. You're on air.
What a great man Pierce Morgan is.
Yeah, you say, you say it quite weirdly.
You say Pierce because all the Americans call him Pierce, as in
Pierce Brosnan and Pierce. And that really I can see that
ticks him off. So I'm thinking you're doing
this even just in case he's watching tick him off.
But he is very thin skinned. I wrote something about him.
I went on. Ago, you were your friends.
You were friends. I'm.
Not friends. I've had supper with him a
couple of times and I went to, I went to, I went on holiday.
Somebody invited me to play golf in Marrakech, which is really
not my thing, but it was the editor of my then newspaper that
I was writing for. So I went and Piers Morgan was
on it. And we've met in the, the editor
gets given some gold cards. So we're in the first class
lounge or wherever in Heathrow. And I'm quite interested to meet
Piers Morgan because he's like, he's just come off the back of
all. He's being fired from the mirror
and he's just written his first book.
Prior to CNN. Well, yeah.
And I said to the guy who'd invite me, I said, how would you
describe Piers Morgan? Am I going to like him?
He said, no, you're not going to like him.
And I said, how would you describe him?
And he said one word, shameless. And that was absolutely right.
We turned up at the hotel in Marrakech and he had his book
and he put it in a see through bag and he walked around the
swimming pool so that everyone knew he'd written this book.
And then he's kind of, when we played golf, he just did this
kind of macho banter, like sledging all the time, like, and
he just like, fuck off. So I just found him quite
tedious. And then I wrote an article and
I said just one line about him, something about what's happened
to Piers Morgan or whatever. And I get a long e-mail from him
saying, well, I'm currently sitting in a hot tub in Antigua,
so life can't be that bad, can it?
You know, I don't know. He's very much like me how I
behave in my comments. So, well, he was one of the
first people to get people like Andrew Tate and obviously HS Tik
Tokie comparison on to for an interview.
Yeah, why would you do that? Well, because he clicks well,
you know, at his core, he's a tabloid.
You know, I mean, he's very good at that.
He knows what people want to watch.
And he's, you know, that's what those tabloids were.
I just watched this documentary on the Murdochs and it was like
they were saying, who are we appealing to?
And they said we're appealing to the guy in the corner of the pub
that doesn't like Muslims or poofs and doesn't like smart but
also likes to see tits in newspapers.
That's what they're after, and that's me.
Couldn't have picked a better podcast and they don't ask me
that. It's literally you've you've
literally summed up. That's the.
Problem. But but going back to to your
wife, you only knew her for six weeks and said she's the one.
Yeah, I did. Yeah, well, she was fucking old,
so I just thought, you know, didn't have time.
Didn't have time. Do you think that would work
these days? In what sense for white people?
In what sense is the arranged? Yeah.
Why people you, you guys have been together 55 years and
they're like, I'm not sure she's the 1M.
I think I don't know because this was before Tinder and you
know I've never done dating apps, right?
I've no idea. The dating app seems to me it's
like it's the sort of dating equivalent of the breakfast
buffet. Like it's never over.
Like there's always, you're always hungry.
That's why I'm not married. Yeah, so there you go.
I I got banned from them. Did you?
Yeah, I got a report for overusing.
I completed them. Really, didn't you?
You got the final boss. I got this big woman.
Yeah. Tiger uppercut.
Yeah. Those are the good old days, my
good old days. We could walk up to a Doris and
grab her arse. That's right, yeah.
Which is reminiscing, yeah. So I, I think there's a couple
of other points I wanted to bring up.
Good. I didn't want to really talk
about your pet, Wilbur. But no, he's dead, so it'd be
awkward. Sorry, sorry, sorry to hear
that. But dark tourism, you like to go
to areas like the like Chernobyl.
My favorite thing in North Korea they allowed, they decided
someone tried to set up their first Pyongyang International
Film Festival and it was finally approved.
And then they couldn't find a film that that would be
approved. In the end, obviously, they went
with Mr. Bean. Mr. Bean Movie.
It was like the most inoffensive.
But what was brilliant, I went to see it and they had a guy
from the government at the side of the screen with a loud hailer
explaining in Korean what was going on on the screen.
It was fantastic. Well, the thing about like Mr.
Bean and going back to your comedy, is it it couldn't and
cross language. Barriers.
Well, interesting, I didn't think mine would, but you know,
Mr. Bean and Benny Hill are the 2 great examples of.
I would put you up there. No, but in visual, yeah, because
like a lot of Trigger app, he's not visual.
A lot of it is me explaining I'm having a massive nervous
breakdown, which is trickier. But yeah, Trigger did do well.
We sold to 80. Countries and I won the palm
door. It did win the palm door.
I didn't expect that. Yeah, incredible achievement
there. Wasn't you and Tarantino in the
same? Year, me and Tarantino, it was
amazing. Yeah.
And I think in Cannes I got a longer standing evaluation than
Tarantino. I'm not surprised because at
that time, you know, he was saying some quite contentious
things about. About.
I think it was about no.
What did he say back then? It was about Roman Polanski.
Yes, that he wasn't a rapist. That he was, she was, she was
quite inviting. Yeah, Yeah, that's right.
Yeah. The victim.
Whereas now he's much more acceptable.
Yeah, isn't that now? Yeah, things are drunk.
He's a bore, Tarantino. Jesus Christ, The idea of
listening to an evening in Tarantino be like listening to
this podcast on me. It's like he just doesn't stop
talking about himself. He needs to fuck off and do 1.
Who would you say? Oh well, you're not a film buff.
Well, I'm, I mean, I like films. I mean, Hitchcock, I'm obsessed
with. I've seen every Hitchcock film
and I've I've got a photograph of each Hitchcock cameo.
I think he did 52 films and you know, he does a cameo in each
each film. I've got that and put it
together in a collage on my wall.
That's the kind of exciting life I lead.
Would we like to plug anything at the moment?
No, you're going back on. Oh, I'm doing a tour.
So Trig Abbey TV is 25 years old and I did 4 massive for me live
shows to celebrate it. And I thought that would be it
because I really, I'm not massively into nostalgia, but I
did really enjoy like looking back at it and people really
enjoyed it 25 years on. But I got back together with the
guy I made Trig happy with. Sam had gone off to LA and while
we were doing that we started filming new stuff, mainly
because people told me I couldn't because it was too woke
and I'd be stabbed and the stuff was really funny.
And so we've actually filmed the last four months we've been
filming crazy amounts of stuff. So I am going on tour, I'm doing
100 day UK tour for Trig. Happy 25th anniversary, looking
at everything you ever want to know about Trig Appy, but also
with new stuff, so it's kind of interesting.
I can't wait. I'm going to come.
I don't know if you'll like it, but it's good, yeah.
You know, I was such AI would watch that show over and over,
would you? I would still watch.
It I can't tell whether you're being serious or not, but.
You know, this is the thing about me is people think I'm
always. Strong.
I've just no idea. And of course, this is the
problem I've had, I guess why I'm probably not married.
Yeah, it's nobody knows I. Really love you.
I would love, I love you, Dom. Yeah, but it's such a great
show. And what you did for the mobile
phone? Industry, yeah.
Well, that was that was really what it was about.
I mean, that was a plant. No.
Do they used to give you phones at the time?
No, not at all. Nokia.
I mean the two things that we can't talk about, you know, the
supposedly the myths. The first, it's a Nokia phone.
It wasn't a Nokia phone, never was a Nokia phone.
It was actually. I nicked it outside Edgeware Rd.
in Edgeware Rd. just when I was on my way to Marushi and there
was a mobile phone store. There was a display outside
display thing and it was of a Sony Mars bar.
If you remember the Sony Mars bar.
Oh yeah. It's quite a cool phone.
So that was what that phone was. And then I chose the the
ringtone was that annoying ringtone.
It's called Grand Vals. I fucking hated it.
So I thought if I use this then maybe it'll no one will use it
because they'll be Dick heads. And then between me filming and
it going out on telly, Nokia made that grand valse, the Nokia
tune and they made it the default thing on any Nokia
phone. So for me it was like perfect
guerrilla marketing, like every time that went off people
thought trigger happy. But I had nothing to do with
Nokia like it was. And also, I've never had an ad.
No one's ever, no mobile phone companies ever approached me for
an ad. I'm like, for fuck's sake.
And I met someone at Vodafone once and they said, well, that's
because you're the enemy. And I said so fine.
So get me being a Dick head and then go don't be like this Dick
head. Use Vodafone.
It's just an idea of Vodafone you can have.
Yeah, yeah. Advertising execs aren't the.
They not creative people? Are they creatives of strangely
uncreative? Exactly, I mean you would have
been the perfect face. I I even did a Sony.
Did you Sony mobile phone out at the time?
Did you? Yeah.
I've never done one but you know, it's never too late and I
got no pension so it'd be great. Yeah, I mean, I don't even know
if they advertise mobile phones anymore.
No, that's probably why. What we're shooting on right
now, cameras. I don't even use these to make
phone calls. I just use them for the camera.
Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah.
That's what a phone is. Yeah.
These are as powerful as what's in your pocket now.
You probably made your show on devices which weren't as
powerful as what's in our pocket now.
Yeah, well, I mean, the whole joke is that on my laptop
there's more computer power than what they used to get people to
land on the moon, if you believe they land on the moon, which I
do because I'm not a fucking idiot.
We've, I think we've, I think we've covered most of your life
and, and, and life's to come. Yeah, yeah.
What next for? I've got loads of things going.
I've got a new book coming out in November.
So in the pursuit of happiness, I went off to India to try all
sorts of Aya Verdict and yoga stuff and I hated it.
Checked myself into a into a monastery.
I went to Denmark, happiest country in the world.
So that's a good book. It's called the soul tourist.
I've got I'm filming lots of new stuff, which I'm going to
release under the name Mugwaffin, but I don't know how
I'm going to release it yet. I was going to go YouTube, but I
feel I've missed the YouTube boat that's over.
So I'm going to release it on a new something, I don't know what
yet. And then I've got 100 day Live
tour, Snapchat. Snapchat would be a good thing,
actually. Yeah, there we go.
But it wasn't that. Fuck all.
Yeah, because you, you were at the height of British comedy
when it probably peaked. Yeah, probably on televisual.
I wasn't very comfortable being at the height, though.
I like being a dog snapping at the ankles.
You've got to be at the right place at the right time.
Yeah, I was definitely there at the right time.
I've decided to relaunch my podcast as everyone.
Well, it's great because no one's got a podcast.
Nobody's nobody's doing. This could really kick off.
I think my milkman turned them this morning, asked me to
subscribe. I just want to say, Mr. Jolly,
what an honour and a privilege. It was like sitting down with
Jack Nicholson himself. He's.
Yeah, I think it's bollocks, but thank you very much and I
genuinely, I'm a big fan of yours and I enjoyed.
Thank you very much for hanging. Me on I can't wait to come to
the trigger happy TV. 25th anniversary live tour Andrew
dates. The London day is the.
London Day, it's like Clapton Grand or somewhere, I don't know
where it is. I'm going to do a couple more.
So we used. To film standard for the week is
it, But you're going across the country. 100 days is a big tour.
I'm very proud. Of most people just do 6 big
arenas like yourself. And you did 2 arenas?
Yeah, we still you did an arena. But yeah, I can't wait to see
the show, Mr. Jolly, and I think you have the best name in in
entertainment. Thank you very much.
I think yours is complicated. Up there with Jeremy Beadle.
Yeah, well, Beadle's a high prize jolly's about.
Yeah, yeah. And you jolly around good.
One honour and a privilege, Mr. Dom Jolly, the legend himself.
I had Suzie Izzard on the previous incarnation of this
podcast. Oh God, have I misgendered them?
I can't. Say you said Eddie Izzard, which
is now good, but you can call. I don't know.
I just don't. You can't follow you.
Can't follow her, Sue. I don't know how to can't
follow. Call her Sorry I didn't ask you
at the beginning of this podcast.
Your pronouns I. Don't have any pronouns.
OK. I think we should end that's I
think we should end there. Thanks for watching this podcast
so far. Hope you're enjoying it.
And if you are, leave a five star review, drop some comments.
I might even read them out in future episodes and give you a
shout out.