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It appears that the women that 
you know all around the world 

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are getting fed up with men as 
well and their lack of their 

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lack of want to to commit a. 
100% the the fact of like so 

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many of these men in the 
different stories of my 

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different women. 
My women. 

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My women, my friends, female 
friends all over the planet 

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showcases the same repeating 
pattern of like a lack of effort

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00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:30,960
or a fear of commitment or 
emotional immaturity or so many 

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things that you you would think 
they all live in the same 

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neighborhood because of the 
repeating patterns. 

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While my male friends who are 
single, they have varied 

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stories. 
There's like, Oh yeah, I met 

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this girl, but things didn't 
work out because of their 

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family. 
She was not going oh because her

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mental health was not good 
because of like it's not the 

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same repeating pattern that I 
see in my female friends which 

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is like oh the dude was kind of 
shitty and flaked on me. 

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While the the times that my male
friends didn't worked out with 

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other females, it is mostly 
because of like deep entrenched 

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stuff or big capital 
incompatibilities that they were

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not able to handle. 
Hello, and welcome back to 

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another episode of Dating, 
Laughter and Disasters with me, 

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00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:18,200
Lulu Johnson, the show that's 
all about the highs and lows of 

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modern dating. 
And on this podcast, we're 

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laughing about it. 
Joining me on the show today is 

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a man, full stop. 
Full stop. 

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Hello. 
Hello, Leo. 

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How are you? 
I am well staying hydrated. 

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Staying hydrated in this hot 
weather. 

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00:01:33,960 --> 00:01:36,920
It is September. 
You're wearing a Mexican mask. 

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I am indeed. 
How are you feeling in the 

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Mexican mask? 
7% more Mexican. 

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Love it, right Leo? 
Tell us where? 

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Wait now, what do I always say? 
Where are you from? 

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How long have you have you been 
in Berlin and what is your 

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current dating status? 
I'm from, I mean, originally I 

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was born in Brazil, then I live 
most of my life in Chile and 

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00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:03,080
legally I appear as Italian. 
So I guess that's it. 

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00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:08,240
How long have I been in Berlin? 
Living in Berlin since May, so I

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00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:10,039
would say like around 5:00-ish 
months. 

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If my math is mouthing and 
living in Germany, I would say 

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00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,920
around 3 1/2, three and eight 
months. 

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00:02:17,560 --> 00:02:19,120
Lovely. 
OK, well then let's get straight

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00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:21,680
into it, because all the female 
listeners will want to know 

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because you're a man on the 
scene in Berlin. 

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Yes. 
Although, and you've just been 

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00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:29,240
like dating elsewhere as well. 
How is it? 

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00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:31,960
How has dating been for you in 
Berlin since May in particular? 

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00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:35,720
Since May in particular, it has 
been great. 

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00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:39,600
I am currently seeing someone, 
so that is going well. 

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And that's the end of the 
episode because there's no 

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drama. 
Yeah, I know. 

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So I think since May, since I 
moved here, things have been 

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going very well. 
I would say stable, consistent 

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and in the best way possible, I 
would say good. 

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But before that, dating in 
Berlin has been a experience, 

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full stop. 
I want to 1st pick your brains 

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about how quick was it for you 
to find someone who you're now 

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dating? 
How long has it been? 

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We've been dating since. 
Gosh, that's a question that I 

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should have come more prepared. 
No, I would say like 3:00-ish 

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months, give or take one or two 
months, more or less. 

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So about three months after 
moving to Berlin, you met 

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someone? 
Yeah, And I bet she's a great 

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woman. 
Yeah, she's. 

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Yeah, OK. 
And where did you meet her? 

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Hinge. 
Of course you did, you see? 

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I, I know, I know, I kind of 
hate them as a concept and the 

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impacts and repercussions that 
that has had in humanity as a 

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whole or in, let's say, human 
connections is atrocious. 

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But my empirical experience on 
using the apps in real life has 

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been good comma even great in 
some cases. 

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I have met like the person I'm 
currently dating, which 

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00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:55,400
hopefully it continues to 
flourish, develop and thrive 

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00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:57,400
into a beautiful relationship. 
We'll see. 

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00:03:58,120 --> 00:04:01,400
But I have also met like 
platonic life partners through 

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these apps. 
I have met great friends through

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00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:06,000
these apps. 
I also had like great horror 

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00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:09,320
stories about like wild stuff 
that has happened while dating 

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00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,920
in Berlin. 
But it has this like 

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00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:15,400
contradictory dichotomy because 
it's like, I wish this was not 

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the thing, but oh boy, have I 
flourished or at least gathered 

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00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:22,120
a whole bunch of cool stories 
and beautiful people in my life 

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00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:24,640
because of these apps. 
That was like, I would have 

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00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,440
never bumped into these humans 
because of it. 

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00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:27,760
There's. 
Definitely pros. 

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00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:31,160
There had been pros to the data.
I think they've just gotten 

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00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:32,840
worse now when people are 
exhausted by them. 

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00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:36,200
But so that kind of doesn't 
answer my question, what I've 

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00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:39,400
always thought or my or my 
statement that men find 

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00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:42,960
relationships easier than women.
OK, you've even been with 

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00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:44,880
someone who's going well for 
three months. 

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00:04:46,880 --> 00:04:50,720
I, I mean, I don't consider 
myself a representative sample 

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00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:52,840
of the male population in many 
regards. 

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00:04:52,840 --> 00:04:57,160
So I have heard the statement of
like it's easier for men to find

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00:04:57,160 --> 00:05:01,600
relationships. 
Or is it because most men have 

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00:05:01,600 --> 00:05:05,000
different filters on acceptance 
when engaging into 

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00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,400
relationships? 
Or how much they prioritize a 

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00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:10,400
relationship over friendships or
relationships over other sort of

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00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:14,160
connections or romantic 
relationship over other sorts of

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00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:14,920
relationships? 
Come on. 

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00:05:14,920 --> 00:05:17,040
Like our friends are so 
important in our lives and we 

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should treat them and love them 
and hold them to the same 

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pedestal that we hold our 
romantic relationships and not 

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keep them into this two separate
columns. 

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00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,160
I mean, preferably not fuck all 
your friends, but whatever rocks

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your boat. 
No judging. 

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00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:31,280
Here, but like, because that was
actually one of my questions 

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was, do you think that men have 
different standards for their 

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relationships? 
Because I know that as women, we

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do want men to tick many boxes. 
But that's because as, as women 

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in the world that we live in, 
we, we're under a lot of 

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pressure to be a certain way to 
look a certain way. 

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OK, as men are too. 
But I I was told once by a 

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friend that men's list is much 
shorter for their expectations 

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of what a relationship should 
look like and how their partner 

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should be. 
I mean, I do believe that the 

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boot of patriarchy, it squeezes 
both of our genders in the neck.

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We just have different effects 
out of it. 

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00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:09,000
But yeah, I do think to a 
certain degree that let's say 

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the check boxes of what is 
considered acceptable shifts 

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between gender roles and how 
some people might have more 

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filters and expectations versus 
others. 

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But I also think at least coming
from the male perspective, 

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because of the asymmetry of the 
dating game of mostly, I could 

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say as well, like bias because 
of either social, cultural and 

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00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:33,400
now digital frameworks in which 
we approach dating. 

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00:06:34,040 --> 00:06:38,040
I would say, let's say men have 
lesser check boxes because we 

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don't have as many opportunities
as most women on the apps or in 

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dating or let's say in general, 
like usually this experience, 

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OK, extrapolating on some data 
points here and there, but most 

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women have, let's say, a 
repertoire of potential matches 

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or like. 
However, the ratio like how many

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swipes turn into matches on 
female users versus male users 

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00:06:58,880 --> 00:07:00,840
on most apps is incredibly 
asymmetrical. 

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00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:05,760
So that let's say frameworks 
your way or your perception on 

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00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:08,320
how to view a relationship very 
differently. 

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00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:13,400
If it's like a rare scarce 
resource, a match in an app 

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00:07:13,640 --> 00:07:19,280
versus like I have 7 for Friday 
evening versus most user male 

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00:07:19,280 --> 00:07:22,880
users which will have like oh I 
got a match this month, whoopee.

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00:07:23,280 --> 00:07:24,880
I don't know the real 
statistics, so take this with a 

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00:07:24,880 --> 00:07:26,640
grain of salt. 
Yeah, no, but it is true that 

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men get like 2 matches a week. 
I want to say, but I went on 

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00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:34,120
Hinge. 
I actually download a Hinge on 

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00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,840
the weekend just out of 
curiosity and also to get a 

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00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:40,200
couple of screenshots for just 
material online because I'm, I 

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00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,000
am done with the apps. 
But I was, I was curious because

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I've been with a bunch of 
friends at the weekend and a lot

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00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:45,720
of them were in couples and 
they've met from online. 

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So I was like, I'll just look 
another look, even though I'd 

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00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:51,280
sworn off them. 
I got one match. 

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00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:55,080
That was it. 
And I was like, I, I look good. 

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00:07:55,320 --> 00:08:00,040
I, I went to change my, my age 
out of curiosity, but I didn't 

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00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:01,680
do it in the end because then 
it's like you can only change it

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00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:02,800
once. 
If you want to change it back, 

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00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:04,480
you've got to put your 
government ID on it. 

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00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:08,320
And what? 
Like why am I not getting 

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00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:10,200
matches? 
And I wonder, is it just down to

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00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:12,560
my age? 
I think there's there's got to 

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00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:15,320
be a lot of different variables.
It could be one age, it could be

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00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:17,680
two. 
How the algorithm perceives your

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00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:21,320
newly created account. 
Also, even though I say they 

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00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:23,560
they discriminate, they don't 
have this, but I do assume 

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00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:26,760
there's some facial recognition 
and they match some people with 

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00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:29,800
facial features to like 
hegemonic like beauty standards.

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00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:32,440
And they be based on that. 
They recommend you to other 

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00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:34,159
people. 
But also like so many variables 

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00:08:34,159 --> 00:08:36,880
on the apps on how they function
and work of like determining the

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00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:39,600
effectiveness on them. 
I mean there are people like out

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00:08:39,600 --> 00:08:43,679
there selling I would assume 
tips and guides on how to 

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00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:47,120
optimize these stuffs. 
But it's actually there's all 

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00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:50,120
German male profiles on it. 
Like I'm not getting any English

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00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:51,440
speakers. 
Obviously I'm in Berlin. 

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00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:54,720
I've never seen so many German 
men. 

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00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:57,840
Oh, interesting. 
Yeah, so and it's not that like 

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00:08:57,840 --> 00:09:00,040
I'm unattractive and that my 
photos aren't nice. 

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00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:02,560
So it's really weird like and 
it's like the people that 

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00:09:02,560 --> 00:09:04,920
they're matching or the the 
people that are in front of me 

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00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:07,280
that I can swipe, they're also 
good looking people, but no 

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00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:10,360
one's even liking me. 
And I'm like, I'm likable, you 

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00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:11,240
know what I mean? 
Like. 

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00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:13,360
Maybe you're shadow band for 
some reason and you don't know. 

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00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:16,240
Yeah, maybe because I have 
restarted that profile a couple 

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00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:19,520
of times. 
Yeah, that's the thing that I, I

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00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:21,880
find it difficult sometimes on 
extrapolating data based on like

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00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:25,040
algorithm stuff is that it has 
so many different variables of 

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00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:28,720
the machinery behind it and it 
has been optimized to not have 

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00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:31,040
you getting matches. 
Like, most of these apps are 

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00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:33,680
optimized to have you paying for
them to get the matches. 

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00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:38,000
So it's like giving you the 
right amount of dripping matches

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00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:40,880
or interesting people to keep 
you hooked on the app rather 

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00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:43,640
than, oh, the purpose of this 
app is to help you solve your 

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00:09:43,640 --> 00:09:45,120
problems in your dating life. 
Yeah, yeah. 

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00:09:45,720 --> 00:09:46,960
You definitely work in tech, 
don't you? 

195
00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:49,080
Yeah. 
Yeah, I could tell. 

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00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:54,800
I love it. 
This episode is sponsored by 

197
00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:57,240
Dalleriata for all of your 
favorite Irish and British 

198
00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:58,880
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Check them out now on 

199
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dalleriata.de or call into them 
on Vince Raza 32 in Prince 

200
00:10:02,600 --> 00:10:06,040
Hauerberg. 
I need to hear if you have got 

201
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:09,200
any crazy stories from the male 
perspective like us women have 

202
00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:10,680
been dealing with. 
Yeah. 

203
00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:12,920
I mean, I do have a couple quick
questions I have. 

204
00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:14,040
Can I curse? 
Yeah. 

205
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:17,240
Oh my God, you are more than 
welcome. 

206
00:10:17,240 --> 00:10:19,120
Since I'm not a. 
Drug, sex and rock'n'roll. 

207
00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:20,400
Nice. 
Switch the code. 

208
00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:21,680
If you need to switch the code, 
do it. 

209
00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:25,920
OK, yeah, I mean, I do have a 
couple of horror stories from 

210
00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:29,680
the male perspective, but it is 
fun because I don't know, at 

211
00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:31,960
least for me, it is horror 
stories like after the story, 

212
00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:33,680
and I've told this to my friends
and my friends are like, 

213
00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:36,880
horrified about it. 
Like, Leo, how did you went to 

214
00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:39,520
these places and engage with 
these people to do these things?

215
00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:44,000
And I'm like, I'm a horny bitch,
what can I say? 

216
00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:47,280
I mean, it happens to the best 
of us, but at the same time it's

217
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:50,880
like I got the male privilege. 
Like I am a somewhat tall guy. 

218
00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:54,760
I know like my body integrity 
was never fully compromised. 

219
00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:57,880
But yeah, I don't know. 
Again, go for. 

220
00:10:58,080 --> 00:11:01,240
So I was swiping through Field, 
which is this non monogamous 

221
00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:03,360
app. 
I'm a non monogamous person as 

222
00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:04,840
well. 
That's a good way of saying it 

223
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:07,200
actually, because some people 
say it's a sex positive app and 

224
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:10,200
like what's sex positivity? 
OK, a non monogamous app for 

225
00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:11,480
that. 
Well, I imagine with this lady 

226
00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:14,320
here in Berlin and we started 
talking about a very nerdy 

227
00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:16,200
trading card game called Magic 
the Gathering. 

228
00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:18,720
Shout out to anyone listening to
this that knows what I'm talking

229
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,560
about. 
I certainly don't. 

230
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:22,720
I know it's a very nerdy game, 
very cool. 

231
00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:26,160
But and so we're talking about 
this like trading card games and

232
00:11:26,160 --> 00:11:27,360
blah, blah, blah, and this, this
and that. 

233
00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:30,480
And then she just says like, 
like, let to like, let's see 

234
00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:32,880
each other and let's meet up and
see each other face to face 

235
00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:34,760
because yeah, photos and 
whatever. 

236
00:11:35,680 --> 00:11:37,240
Also, I would say first red 
flag. 

237
00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:41,600
She didn't have any photos of 
herself on her profile except 

238
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:45,440
for a photo of her crotch in 
underwear. 

239
00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:50,840
And I would remember like Alice 
in Wonderland doll right next to

240
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:52,840
it. 
And I'm like, is this like how 

241
00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:56,200
deep does a rabbit hole go kind 
of a thing or not? 

242
00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:58,400
Still I did not get an answer 
from that, but whatever. 

243
00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:02,040
So we meet up, we are going to 
still have lunch in this Korean 

244
00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:05,880
place right next to Tempelhof. 
And she shows up with like cards

245
00:12:05,880 --> 00:12:07,960
as a gift. 
And I'm like, Oh my God, that's 

246
00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:09,840
so sweet. 
Like first date gifts. 

247
00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,000
I have never experienced that in
my life. 

248
00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:14,640
And she just shows up with like 
trading cards, like here. 

249
00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:16,880
I saw a couple and I'm like, Oh 
my God, that's so cute. 

250
00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:18,720
Thank you. 
I put them in my backpack. 

251
00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:20,360
We just start talking. 
We have lunch. 

252
00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:22,160
Things are flowing well. 
We just like, hey, you want to 

253
00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:26,320
have a walk by Shpeti, grab 
something to drink and just loop

254
00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:28,280
around Tempelhof. 
Yeah, sure, why not? 

255
00:12:28,640 --> 00:12:30,640
So we grab some drinks. 
We started talking and talking 

256
00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:31,800
and talking. 
Things were going. 

257
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:34,080
I wouldn't say they're amazing 
or bad. 

258
00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:37,040
It was just an OK conversation 
with someone that you just bond 

259
00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:40,880
with. 
And still nothing gave any hints

260
00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:43,640
about what was to come. 
And we're just like talking, 

261
00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:45,040
talking. 
She was very ADHD, very 

262
00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:47,280
autistic. 
And I'm like, that's my type. 

263
00:12:49,680 --> 00:12:51,360
It's like you're checking all 
the boxes, girl. 

264
00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:54,760
No monogamous, neuro divergent 
and fun woo. 

265
00:12:56,080 --> 00:12:59,120
And so the date ended up very 
chill. 

266
00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:02,000
Not even like kisses or like 
many like, hey, what up baby 

267
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,400
girl? 
Nothing very deep or flirtatious

268
00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:06,440
and just each one went our own 
way. 

269
00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:09,000
But I saw a couple of things. 
Like I saw that she had like a 

270
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:12,080
scar going like around her neck 
down like in a straight line. 

271
00:13:12,080 --> 00:13:16,000
And I was thinking like, oh boy,
that sounds like some heavy deep

272
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,880
trauma behind or some like heavy
story. 

273
00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:21,040
And I was like a scar whatever. 
So we continue texting again, 

274
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:23,960
very chill, very vanilla stuff. 
And she just invites me one day 

275
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:26,680
like hey Leah, I want to come 
and cuddle in my place like 

276
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,840
Friday evening. 
I think like a week and a half 

277
00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:32,320
afterwards and I'm like, I know 
that does not mean cuddle. 

278
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:36,640
So I went down to her place 
again. 

279
00:13:36,840 --> 00:13:38,960
Second time seeing someone and 
already jumping to the 

280
00:13:38,960 --> 00:13:40,400
opportunity of going to their 
house. 

281
00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:44,280
Male privilege as fuck. 
So I take the S ban going to 

282
00:13:44,280 --> 00:13:48,080
like southwest Berlin. 
It was at the end of like almost

283
00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:50,960
close to the border of 
Brandenburg because it was very 

284
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,360
freaking far away. 
And also the S ban wasn't 

285
00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:54,520
working because it was on the 
repair. 

286
00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:56,920
So I had to take a bus, then the
bus I had to take a tram. 

287
00:13:57,120 --> 00:14:00,080
And then after that they docked 
me off of like a random tram 

288
00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:01,560
station. 
And she told me like oh can you 

289
00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:03,640
send me an SMS? 
Because if I leave my house, I 

290
00:14:03,640 --> 00:14:05,960
don't have the data Internet 
anymore. 

291
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,840
So she comes, she picks me up, 
then she walks like 20 minutes 

292
00:14:08,840 --> 00:14:10,520
back to her place from the tram 
stop. 

293
00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,400
And I'm like, where the hell am 
I getting into? 

294
00:14:13,680 --> 00:14:15,720
She was like, yeah, sorry, it's 
because I just lived so far 

295
00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:17,320
away. 
So I just give you this point of

296
00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:18,880
reference. 
And then I just walked to my 

297
00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:21,240
place. 
We get to her house, we open the

298
00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:25,280
door and I get hit in the face 
with the smell of a church like.

299
00:14:26,160 --> 00:14:28,360
Incense. 
Incense like that very specific 

300
00:14:28,440 --> 00:14:30,800
type of candle smell that you 
get in Catholic churches. 

301
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,160
Shout out to everyone that going
to Catholics. 

302
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:36,120
Catholics. 
Yo, what up, Catholics? 

303
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:39,280
And the flat was completely 
dark. 

304
00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:41,680
And I'm like, OK, so she's going
to turn on the lights now. 

305
00:14:42,160 --> 00:14:46,280
No, no, completely dark as well.
And then she just switches on a 

306
00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:51,520
lamp that was the size of, I 
would say like 1 meter, 60 

307
00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:54,480
centimeters of the moon on a 
hallway. 

308
00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:55,840
The moon. 
The moon. 

309
00:14:55,840 --> 00:14:58,040
It was a replica of the moon 
that went from the ceiling until

310
00:14:58,040 --> 00:14:59,440
the floor. 
A round moon a. 

311
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:02,480
Round moon, a round full moon 
and that was the only light 

312
00:15:02,480 --> 00:15:04,880
source in like half of the 
apartment. 

313
00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:07,800
Then she goes into her living 
room and turns like a fountain 

314
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:10,880
and three small lights and she 
just is like oh come into the 

315
00:15:10,880 --> 00:15:13,880
living room and just chill. 
The living room had almost no 

316
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:17,960
furniture just animal rugs in 
the floor and like pillows to 

317
00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:20,880
like lounge and chill and a 
water fountain in a corner. 

318
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:27,080
Library on another and a 
chandelier made of driftwood 

319
00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:29,720
without lights, just driftwood 
floating on top. 

320
00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:32,960
And I'm like, oh, this is a very
peculiar thing. 

321
00:15:33,320 --> 00:15:35,280
And then we just start talking. 
She's like, oh, yeah, because I 

322
00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:37,640
build all of my furniture out of
driftwood and wood that I found 

323
00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:39,600
because I love camping and I 
love exploring and stuff. 

324
00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:41,680
And I'm like, OK. 
And then she started telling me,

325
00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:43,800
like, yeah, because I love going
naked into nature and just 

326
00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:46,080
walking around. 
And I'm like, OK, And I also 

327
00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:48,640
love hunting. 
And I'm like, Oh yeah, I'm 

328
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:51,640
applying to get like a Hunter's 
license and get like guns and 

329
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:54,320
start buying some rifles because
I want to go hunting to the 

330
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:57,560
countryside. 
And I'm like, oh, interesting. 

331
00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:00,160
And then she says like, yeah. 
And if you look over here, you 

332
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:03,000
can see that I'm also practicing
to do archery. 

333
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:05,320
And I have a bow and arrow and 
like a target practice. 

334
00:16:05,640 --> 00:16:09,440
And then I see and she has a 
compound bow like around 30 plus

335
00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:11,960
arrows in a in the. 
Stand. 

336
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:14,200
In the stand, I don't know what 
to think when you put the arrows

337
00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:17,760
in and, like, a big block of 
cardboard with, like, a whole 

338
00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:20,600
bunch of holes into it that she 
was just practicing AIM. 

339
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,720
And I'm like, oh, I'm in the 
House of someone that is armed. 

340
00:16:25,520 --> 00:16:29,720
And so things started moving. 
And, yeah, then she just shows 

341
00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:33,040
me her entire library was like, 
tarot cards and books about AI. 

342
00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:35,960
And I'm like, that's a very 
interesting combination. 

343
00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:37,880
She started talking about like, 
yeah, because it's all about the

344
00:16:37,880 --> 00:16:40,680
mysticism of the universe we're 
creating, the new intelligence 

345
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:41,880
that's going dominate the 
planet. 

346
00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:44,320
And I'm like, I've heard this 
argument before. 

347
00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:46,960
I'm slightly afraid. 
And then she just tours the 

348
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:48,920
apartment and shows me. 
One of her bedrooms was 

349
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:52,760
completely rented by her ex that
moved to the US and was just 

350
00:16:52,760 --> 00:16:57,680
paying half of the rent to store
books and he had books from the 

351
00:16:57,680 --> 00:17:00,520
ceiling to the floor. 
Stacks upon stacks upon, stacks 

352
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:01,480
upon stacks of. 
Books. 

353
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:03,120
It was just shelving. 
There was no beds. 

354
00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:06,280
No bed, just books piled on top 
of each other in an entire 

355
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:09,119
bedroom that was just being used
for that and she was getting 

356
00:17:09,119 --> 00:17:11,760
half her rent. 
And I'm like, it's Berlin, I'm 

357
00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:15,000
not judging while you get your 
rent done, girl, you go. 

358
00:17:15,359 --> 00:17:17,839
And then she showed me her 
bedroom where the magic happens,

359
00:17:18,119 --> 00:17:22,400
which was a mattress on the 
floor, no bed frame, which I 

360
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:24,160
found it hilarious because 
that's such a stereotype that 

361
00:17:24,160 --> 00:17:27,560
everyone says like a red flag is
a guy that has just a mattress 

362
00:17:27,560 --> 00:17:29,600
on the floor. 
I found the female version of 

363
00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:32,720
that. 
And I was like, yo, role 

364
00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:33,760
reversal. 
Nice. 

365
00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:37,120
And also all the walls were 
painted black with like big 

366
00:17:37,120 --> 00:17:40,040
velvety curtains, though draped 
from the ceiling and we're like 

367
00:17:40,120 --> 00:17:42,880
unfurling into the floor. 
And all the walls had like 

368
00:17:42,880 --> 00:17:48,960
satanic iconography everywhere. 
So it was like a Virgin Mary 

369
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,960
that was opening her vulva, a 
Christ that was upwards down, 

370
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:55,560
bleeding hearts everywhere. 
And a lot of like sexually 

371
00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:58,440
satiny themed kind of stuff for 
a bedroom. 

372
00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:02,040
And I was like, that's a very 
interesting choice of the core 

373
00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:04,680
for your inner. 
Sanctum, how did you feel up to 

374
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:05,960
this point? 
Were you a bit like, well, this 

375
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:08,560
is a bit weird, just bit kinky? 
Were you excited? 

376
00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:14,240
I was slightly afraid because 
the whole like weapons and the 

377
00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:17,560
our bow and arrow thing was like
a little bit disturbing to say 

378
00:18:17,560 --> 00:18:21,680
the least, for me at least. 
Then the whole Satan stuff, that

379
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:22,760
was fun. 
That was interesting. 

380
00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:24,920
I was like, oh Satan, that 
sounds fun. 

381
00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:31,080
This for me. 
And the driftwood thing is like,

382
00:18:31,280 --> 00:18:34,360
Oh yeah, naturey, kind of 
crunchy humans, whatever. 

383
00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:38,920
The thing was is that after we 
go back into the living room, we

384
00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:41,040
start chilling, we start talking
and everything again. 

385
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:44,240
Not a lot of like, flirty vibes,
just sitting down and talking. 

386
00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:48,320
And then she was like, want me 
to show you my bone collection? 

387
00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:51,840
Oh my God. 
And I was like, what? 

388
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:54,720
She's like, yeah, because I love
collecting different bones and 

389
00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:57,280
ossuary from different animals. 
And she just start pulling out 

390
00:18:57,280 --> 00:19:02,160
like, this is the skull of a 
Wildcat, this is the skull of a 

391
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,520
cow. 
This is the bone of this animal.

392
00:19:04,520 --> 00:19:07,320
She just start pulling out bones
out of like behind the counters 

393
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:08,520
that she had. 
Her bone box. 

394
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:10,000
Bone box. 
Exactly. 

395
00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:12,520
And I was just like, oh, 
interesting. 

396
00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:14,160
Again. 
At this point nothing seemed 

397
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:17,240
like out of the ordinary because
I was just like vibing like OK 

398
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:19,360
this is a weirdo, whatever. 
Nothing seemed out of the 

399
00:19:19,360 --> 00:19:22,080
ordinary, but everything you've 
just described seemed at the 

400
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,080
ordinary. 
Woman with her arrows and all 

401
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:25,440
this shit. 
But this is brilliant. 

402
00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:27,240
Past the popcorn. 
Fucking hell. 

403
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:30,160
And then she just says like, oh,
want to see my favorite bone in 

404
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:32,480
my collection? 
And I'm like, yeah, sure. 

405
00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:36,800
And then she gets very tense. 
She looks on one side, looks on 

406
00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:38,800
other, and I'm like, the fuck, 
you're in your own house, girl, 

407
00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:41,560
what you're looking for? 
And then she just goes behind 

408
00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:44,160
her library, behind the tarot 
cards that she was having. 

409
00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:47,520
And she just pulls out a weird 
bone and looks at me like, hey, 

410
00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:49,560
have a look. 
And I start looking at bones. 

411
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,880
I am not an anatomy guy. 
I am not a medicine guy. 

412
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:53,880
I know very little about the 
human anatomy. 

413
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:59,320
But I see that on the tip of the
bone there is like the partial 

414
00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:02,080
part of an implant that goes 
into a hip replacement. 

415
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:04,600
And I just look at this and I 
was like, oh, is this a human 

416
00:20:04,600 --> 00:20:06,200
bone? 
She's like, oh, yeah, yes, it 

417
00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:07,680
is. 
How good were you to identify 

418
00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:09,440
it? 
And I'm like, where did you find

419
00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:11,400
this? 
She was like 01 day. 

420
00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:13,880
I was just walking by some train
tracks, and I found this. 

421
00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:19,400
And I'm like, yo, then you call 
the police for this. 

422
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:21,120
And she was like, oh, no, I 
wouldn't. 

423
00:20:21,120 --> 00:20:23,200
If I had called the police, they
would have taken away my bone. 

424
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:24,800
And I want to keep it from my 
collection. 

425
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:30,040
I can't open my mouth any wider.
This is fucking mad. 

426
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:34,160
Jesus, I know and instead of 
running away, which a lot of my 

427
00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:36,760
friends says like you should 
have done that again. 

428
00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:38,400
I was a horny bitch that 
evening. 

429
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:39,760
Did you show her your own bone? 
Huh. 

430
00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:46,200
Yes. 
So then she after showing me her

431
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,440
bone, she just says like, Oh no,
do you want to smoke some weed? 

432
00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:50,680
And I'm like, what? 
Yeah, it's legal weed because 

433
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:52,640
now it's legal in Germany. 
And I just got a prescription 

434
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:55,880
from it and I was like, sure, 
I've never smoking legal weed 

435
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,960
before, why not? 
So she just pulls out like a 

436
00:20:59,120 --> 00:21:01,720
smoking set, like a bag, a 
Ziploc bag with all the 

437
00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:04,520
ingredients there. 
And then she pulls out a glass 

438
00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:08,400
pipe that I am not a very 
experienced person, but for all 

439
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,240
intents and purposes, this look 
like a crack pipe. 

440
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:13,640
And then she just goes to put a 
little bit of weed. 

441
00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:17,160
We smoke a little bit of weed 
and oh boy, that's when things 

442
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:19,880
got scary. 
Oh my gosh, I thought the worst 

443
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:20,840
had already come. 
This is. 

444
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:23,640
Very good. 
No, because I mean, I had 

445
00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:26,360
consumed weed in the past who 
wasn't at their 20s. 

446
00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:29,560
I know what being high on weed 
was like. 

447
00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:32,560
That was not it. 
I started smoking very little. 

448
00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:34,520
I took like 1-2 puffs. 
I passed her the pipe. 

449
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,000
We started like continuing 
talking. 

450
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,600
I'm like waiting to start 
feeling it. 

451
00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:40,680
And I start getting like the 
tingles in my, the point of my 

452
00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:42,880
fingers And I'm like, Oh yeah, 
I'm getting a little bit high. 

453
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:44,200
This is nice. 
This is chill. 

454
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:46,520
Let's chill a little bit. 
But then things just start 

455
00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:49,000
getting higher and higher and 
higher and not stopping. 

456
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:51,680
And I'm like, why is this 
feeling so intense? 

457
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:55,240
Why this is feeling so intense? 
Why is this feeling so intense? 

458
00:21:55,680 --> 00:21:59,000
And then at one point I get 
close to her and we're like 

459
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:02,480
talking or whatever and I start 
feeling my brain dissociating 

460
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:04,320
and getting away from my own 
physical body. 

461
00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:06,480
And I'm like, why am I 
experiencing such an intense 

462
00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:09,280
psychedelic experience? 
I only smoke a little bit of 

463
00:22:09,280 --> 00:22:11,200
weed. 
And I was thinking, Oh my God, 

464
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:12,760
there was something else in that
pipe. 

465
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:14,320
There's got to be something 
else. 

466
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:16,160
And then like my brain just goes
away, like poof. 

467
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:19,800
And my body is just like 
crumbling while I'm like trying 

468
00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:23,120
to keep myself holding. 
I'm just like just falling over.

469
00:22:23,240 --> 00:22:25,360
And she's like holding me like 
because I'm almost fainting. 

470
00:22:25,360 --> 00:22:26,800
And she's like, Leo, are you OK?
Are you OK? 

471
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:32,440
And I'm like not being able to 
speak or hold myself because I 

472
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:35,320
don't know what wasn't that weed
or pipe because I was gone for a

473
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,360
while. 
And while I was gone, I could 

474
00:22:37,360 --> 00:22:39,240
feel her holding me. 
And I just felt this like 

475
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:43,360
universal motherly embrace of 
like holding and keeping me 

476
00:22:43,360 --> 00:22:45,480
safe. 
And I was like, oh, I feel very 

477
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:47,320
safe at this moment. 
But at the same time I was like,

478
00:22:47,520 --> 00:22:49,720
yo, dude, we came here because 
we horny not to feel the 

479
00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:53,400
universal embrace of womanhood. 
So I just like bring my, my 

480
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:56,120
brain back into my body. 
I stand up, I take a deep breath

481
00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:59,360
and they just start making out 
with this woman. 

482
00:22:59,360 --> 00:23:01,440
And then we just started getting
it on. 

483
00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:03,720
Wow. 
Yeah. 

484
00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:08,880
And then I survived the evening.
So yeah, I stayed over and then 

485
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:11,720
I had a spinach buttock for 
breakfast. 

486
00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:16,800
And then I left very cheerful 
and calmly after the entire 

487
00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,400
evening. 
And whenever I tell this to 

488
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:20,400
other people, they say, like, 
Leo, you were not afraid of, 

489
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:22,720
like, your body integrity. 
At any point, you were in the 

490
00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:26,240
House of a person who might have
spiked you with weed and 

491
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:28,840
something else, and they had a 
weapon in their house and you 

492
00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:32,840
decided to just sleep there. 
And I'm like, well, yeah, why 

493
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,080
not? 
It would have taken too long to 

494
00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:35,200
get home. 
Exactly. 

495
00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:36,600
It was way too far. 
No, it'd. 

496
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:42,080
Be easier just to die. 
Did you ever speak to her again?

497
00:23:43,360 --> 00:23:47,040
I spoke to her a couple of weeks
afterwards, afterwards to cut 

498
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:52,040
things off because after that 
interaction we tried to like re 

499
00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:53,960
engage and connect, like hey, 
wanna talk, blah blah. 

500
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:56,440
And she was not that engaging 
with me. 

501
00:23:56,440 --> 00:23:59,080
And I was like, yeah, I don't 
think this is gonna work out 

502
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:00,720
because I'm not looking to just 
a quick hookup. 

503
00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:04,280
I mean nothing against quick 
hookups but like maybe something

504
00:24:04,320 --> 00:24:06,200
else? 
So that was your one and only 

505
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:08,960
interaction with her. 
Yeah, I mean those. 

506
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:11,760
As in like in person. 
Yeah shit, I just remembered 

507
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:14,560
this. 
She explained the scar while we 

508
00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:16,760
were making out. 
While we were making out before 

509
00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:20,320
we I smoked the spiked weed. 
Of course we're clothes getting 

510
00:24:20,320 --> 00:24:23,200
off and skin is getting shown 
and I see the scar and the scar 

511
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:28,200
went down her chest, down the 
belly button, down the crotch. 

512
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:31,360
Area down there. 
And I was like, wait, what the 

513
00:24:31,360 --> 00:24:34,040
hell? 
And she was like, yeah, so I got

514
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,880
this scarification done by an ex
partner that he was a Med 

515
00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:39,040
student. 
And so he just decided to give 

516
00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:40,520
me this. 
I mean, I asked him to and he 

517
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:43,600
just gave me a big scar. 
And so you know the concept of 

518
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:44,760
scarification. 
No. 

519
00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:48,560
OK, this is, let's say a 
controlled scarring tissue that 

520
00:24:48,560 --> 00:24:50,280
you make. 
So you do a cut that is deep 

521
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:53,240
enough to create scar tissue, 
but not deep enough to, would 

522
00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:55,160
you? 
Would you bleed from it? 

523
00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:56,240
Yeah, yeah. 
You would bleed from it. 

524
00:24:56,240 --> 00:25:00,120
And so she would have, she had 
someone cut and leave her like a

525
00:25:00,120 --> 00:25:03,840
controlled scar that went from 
her neck all the way down to her

526
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:07,480
crotch and then it climbed up 
through her back as well. 

527
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:10,120
I don't know too much about like
how deep that was and whatever. 

528
00:25:10,120 --> 00:25:15,240
But yeah, an ex partner just cut
her in half to give her like the

529
00:25:15,240 --> 00:25:17,800
cool scar because she was not 
that into tattoos, but she was 

530
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:18,680
into scars. 
Oh. 

531
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:22,320
God, that's heavy. 
Yeah, that's a small detail to 

532
00:25:22,360 --> 00:25:26,200
add into the whole. 
Yeah, to that whole heavy story.

533
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:27,880
That's just a heavier element to
add. 

534
00:25:28,120 --> 00:25:30,280
Jesus, what's going on? 
Her poor brain. 

535
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:34,080
I don't know. 
But then afterwards I said like,

536
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:36,520
hey, I think this is not working
for us. 

537
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:39,720
This is as far as we go. 
I saw her a couple of months 

538
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:43,280
afterwards on the same app on 
field and she had like a new 

539
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:47,480
profile bio that said I'm 
leaving Berlin in 10 days 

540
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:51,200
organizing A farewell gangbang. 
Who wants to join? 

541
00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:58,240
Oh my. 
Gosh and I really do wish her 

542
00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:00,560
the best. 
I hope she had an amazing 

543
00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:04,720
gangbang and I hope everyone who
participated had fun and no one 

544
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:08,080
got scared or spiked with 
cracked mixed weed or whatever. 

545
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:09,280
That. 
Did you ever ask her what it 

546
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:11,400
was? 
No, I could have. 

547
00:26:11,400 --> 00:26:12,560
You didn't. 
Want to ruin the mood? 

548
00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:16,520
At the moment no, but 
afterwards, no. 

549
00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:18,600
I don't know. 
I was, yeah. 

550
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:21,080
My sense of curiosity was not 
there after the moment. 

551
00:26:21,120 --> 00:26:23,600
I guess you just thought, yeah, 
you just kind of accepted. 

552
00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:25,640
Sometimes it's like it is. 
Or maybe sometimes you just 

553
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:27,200
don't want to know either. 
And it's like it's happened. 

554
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:28,320
I'm alive. 
I'm walking home. 

555
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:29,640
Exactly. 
Like do I want to know? 

556
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:32,680
I was spiked with drugs and I 
was like, that would be a sad 

557
00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:36,320
statistic to add to my life. 
Geez, that's a great story. 

558
00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:39,600
My mouth is left hanging. 
That's a wild. 

559
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:41,240
It's interesting how you didn't 
feel any fear. 

560
00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:45,440
But you know, sometimes you do 
have a you're with someone, 

561
00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:47,960
you're in front of them. 
You didn't feel that she was 

562
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:49,320
dangerous. 
She just had dangerous things 

563
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:52,920
around her though, right? 
Yeah, I think that was part of 

564
00:26:52,920 --> 00:26:54,280
it. 
But also I think part of it was 

565
00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:57,560
like, because at any moment, if 
I really, really, really wanted 

566
00:26:57,560 --> 00:27:00,480
to defend myself physically, I 
know I could overpower her. 

567
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:02,800
That's the thing. 
And that's the thing that I as a

568
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:05,360
man have in more situations, 
most situations that I'm 

569
00:27:05,360 --> 00:27:10,360
engaging with people is that if 
push comes to shove in a date or

570
00:27:10,360 --> 00:27:14,880
whatever, I have the physical 
upper hand of disengaging, 

571
00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:18,080
retreating, defending myself, 
overpowering someone else. 

572
00:27:18,440 --> 00:27:22,680
And yeah, of course that reduces
my overthinking of like, I could

573
00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:25,520
get that damaged by this. 
It's like, no, I am the danger. 

574
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:26,960
In this situation, you are 
actually the weapon. 

575
00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:29,440
Check yourself before you wreck 
yourself. 

576
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:37,840
Make privilege. 
So you're polyamorous? 

577
00:27:38,040 --> 00:27:39,880
Yes. 
So do the relationships that you

578
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:45,880
have always entail polyamory? 
On a theoretical principle, yes.

579
00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:48,600
On an empirical principle, I 
think what I am, the 

580
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:50,600
relationship that I am at the 
moment is the most Poly I've 

581
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:54,280
ever Poly before because the 
girl that I'm dating, she has a 

582
00:27:54,280 --> 00:27:57,480
relationship with a man. 
And that's as far as it as it 

583
00:27:57,480 --> 00:27:59,640
goes. 
But is polyamory tiring? 

584
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:02,160
I mean, it's hard enough to have
one relationship and maintain 

585
00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:06,200
and find the time and, you know,
build the trust, build, build it

586
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:08,840
all, build a relationship. 
How many people have you dated 

587
00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:09,960
at the same time and is it 
difficult? 

588
00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:15,480
Yeah, I'm a very chill human. 
I think I'm the bad Polly or bad

589
00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:20,000
representative of the crowd. 
I think the most I have, I mean 

590
00:28:20,480 --> 00:28:23,040
going on dates with several 
people at the same time. 

591
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:26,560
Yeah, but like dating 
consistently, I think the most 

592
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:29,840
was like 2 and not even that 
much because it was like 1 was 

593
00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:32,240
finishing, the other one began 
short time. 

594
00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:35,680
Maybe an overlap of like a date?
That's just standard Berlin for 

595
00:28:35,680 --> 00:28:36,560
any. 
Exactly. 

596
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:39,000
It's just like standard dating. 
But like it sounds like to me, 

597
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:42,120
and every polyamorous situation 
is different, like you're, 

598
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:45,960
you're dating people in open 
relationships, you find yourself

599
00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:48,520
in open relationships and it 
just kind of means that you can 

600
00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:51,720
date someone, fuck someone, kiss
someone on nights out without 

601
00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:53,440
needing permission. 
Is that kind of your? 

602
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:55,360
Yeah. 
I mean, I think that's mostly 

603
00:28:55,360 --> 00:28:58,520
what I'm aiming is more to 
develop deep connections, deep 

604
00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:02,200
relationships. 
And then if I meet someone else 

605
00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:06,280
throughout my life and I vibe 
with them in a romantic way, I 

606
00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,880
would like to have the freedom 
to connect with this other 

607
00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:11,400
person while sustaining and 
keeping my other relationships 

608
00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:13,920
in a responsible manner. 
While at the same time not 

609
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:18,760
limiting my partners or partner 
to also engaging that sense in 

610
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:22,720
the fact that hey, I was on a 
trip and I met someone, we just 

611
00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:25,680
made out and that's OK. 
I want to love and be loved as 

612
00:29:25,680 --> 00:29:28,600
much as possible and I want the 
people that I love to be loved 

613
00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:32,160
as well. 
And I don't feel like it goes in

614
00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:35,320
detriment of someone else. 
I think the only limited 

615
00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:38,480
resource that we have as humans 
is time, which of course is to 

616
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:40,680
be handled. 
But I don't think like love is 

617
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:42,440
something that you can run out 
of. 

618
00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:45,600
You don't love less your friends
because you meet someone new, a 

619
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:48,400
new friend that joins your 
circle, they just add to your 

620
00:29:48,400 --> 00:29:50,640
life. 
Why can we not have the same 

621
00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:54,920
approach to loving partners? 
Of course it implies a different

622
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:59,080
complexity with regards of time 
wise of sharing life projects, 

623
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:03,840
but yeah, I think it's more like
a management and logistics. 

624
00:30:04,280 --> 00:30:08,720
I would imagine being with 
someone for after five years, 10

625
00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:12,240
years, whatever amount of time 
you'd love to kind of go out and

626
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,360
hell yeah. 
You know, like, and especially 

627
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:17,400
living in Berlin and life is 
different now. 

628
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:18,720
We all want to look good, feel 
good. 

629
00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:21,720
We're also under the pressures 
of looking good as well, right? 

630
00:30:21,720 --> 00:30:24,040
That like there's so many sexy 
people around. 

631
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:25,600
And if like you need to change 
it up. 

632
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:29,200
Like I couldn't imagine staying 
with my one partner for the rest

633
00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:31,720
of my life, especially if the 
sex starts getting boring and 

634
00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:33,560
you just want to like, change it
up a bit. 

635
00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:36,560
Like I had a boyfriend years ago
and he was like, I'm not into 

636
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:38,800
that at all. 
He really believes that sex is 

637
00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:43,200
sacred and that he would never 
open up the relationship or a 

638
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:44,760
marriage. 
And I'm like, that's sweet and 

639
00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:46,880
that's cute, but you're telling 
me this now, but what would you 

640
00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:48,600
be like 20 years down the line 
now? 

641
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:50,400
It's very cute for someone to 
say that. 

642
00:30:50,400 --> 00:30:52,760
And obviously for me, hearing 
that from a man, I was like, I 

643
00:30:52,760 --> 00:30:55,120
thought that is really nice. 
But at the end of the day, like 

644
00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:57,160
he'd don't even knew in Berlin 
and I was already here. 

645
00:30:57,160 --> 00:31:00,840
Many years of I've been to Kit 
Kat, I like he was living in the

646
00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:03,280
West. 
He's had a totally different 

647
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:05,120
Berlin experience. 
West Berlin. 

648
00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:08,160
Yeah, yeah, like totally. 
So he, he actually moved to 

649
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:10,920
Berlin because of his now 
ex-wife and he stayed there. 

650
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:15,200
And when I met him, he was new 
to the east of Berlin. 

651
00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:18,200
So he didn't know any of this. 
So he couldn't imagine. 

652
00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:21,040
He just knew his own values from
his own country. 

653
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:23,160
Do you know what I mean? 
And so I'm just like, I mean, 

654
00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:26,120
I'm looking for a, for a 
monogamous relationship. 

655
00:31:26,480 --> 00:31:29,680
But at the same time I'm like, I
wouldn't say no to opening it up

656
00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:32,960
to feel wanted by someone else. 
Exactly like a monogamist ish I 

657
00:31:32,960 --> 00:31:33,800
think. 
Yeah, yeah, yeah. 

658
00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:36,800
Podcast or something. 
Yeah, I mean that's the thing 

659
00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:39,600
like I do respect and I feel 
like there's I have no 

660
00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:41,000
preference. 
I mean, personally, I do have my

661
00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:44,320
own, but like I try not to judge
anyone if they are monogamous, 

662
00:31:44,360 --> 00:31:46,640
monogamous or everything in 
between because it's just like 

663
00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:50,000
we're eight freaking billion 
humans on this planet. 

664
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,120
We're so many diverse monkeys 
floating up in here. 

665
00:31:52,120 --> 00:31:54,520
That is just like, how can it 
be? 

666
00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:57,040
That is just like 1 frame fits 
all. 

667
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:59,280
No, there's no like, come on. 
Our brains are so different, but

668
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:01,600
we cannot. 
The fact that like we see all 

669
00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:04,280
sexy people online as well, we 
see sexy people everywhere. 

670
00:32:04,280 --> 00:32:06,840
Like when you before the 
Internet was a thing, you just 

671
00:32:06,840 --> 00:32:08,720
knew the people in your town. 
This is it. 

672
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:10,440
Like I mean Tinder, you know you
can. 

673
00:32:10,480 --> 00:32:13,280
I could swipe now on this couch 
for someone in fucking Hong Kong

674
00:32:13,280 --> 00:32:18,640
if I wanted. 
Let's just talk about it like 

675
00:32:18,640 --> 00:32:21,200
men piss me off. 
Now my problem is I'm a very 

676
00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:23,680
straight woman. 
I'm a monogamist woman but 

677
00:32:23,680 --> 00:32:27,480
currently I'm shit sick of men. 
I've heard so much about it. 

678
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:30,480
And, and, and, and a friend of 
mine, he said to me the day he 

679
00:32:30,480 --> 00:32:32,800
said, do you know what? 
I see what's going on? 

680
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:35,440
And he said like the men around 
at the moment, they're such Dick

681
00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:36,920
heads. 
And I'm like, see, even you know

682
00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:37,760
it. 
Do you know what I mean? 

683
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:40,960
Because. 
And I would say it has to do a 

684
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:42,840
lot with sex, be more available 
as well. 

685
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:44,320
Do you know what I mean? 
And like, that's great. 

686
00:32:44,320 --> 00:32:45,760
Yeah. 
We all want a bit of sex, but 

687
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:50,040
like, it was already difficult 
before Field became a thing. 

688
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:53,720
And now that like sex was always
available online when Tinder 

689
00:32:53,720 --> 00:32:55,480
came out as well. 
But I think, well, the one good 

690
00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:57,480
thing about Field is you're kind
of cutting out the middleman and

691
00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:58,680
the and the bullshit with 
Tinder. 

692
00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:00,800
Let's go for a coffee and then 
we fuck. 

693
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,400
Whereas Field is like, this is 
for sex. 

694
00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:07,440
So that's great. 
But I am really fed up with the 

695
00:33:07,440 --> 00:33:09,760
men at the moment of Berlin. 
Like I'm going to Manchester in 

696
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:13,880
two weeks just to go and have a 
bit of crack and like I know 

697
00:33:13,880 --> 00:33:16,000
that I'll vibe well with the 
Manchester lads, do you know 

698
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:16,960
what I mean? 
I. 

699
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:18,880
Always. 
So you're going to go consume 

700
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:21,720
crack in Manchester? 
That's it, Yeah. 

701
00:33:21,720 --> 00:33:24,480
Do you know what crack means? 
A banter. 

702
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:25,560
Banter. 
Oh. 

703
00:33:26,080 --> 00:33:27,520
CRAIC. 
No, I'm going. 

704
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:29,440
I'm not going for the actual 
crack. 

705
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:32,160
I mean, I was like, girl, you're
revealing this stuff on your 

706
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:33,440
podcast. 
It's your own house. 

707
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:35,560
But I mean metaphorically 
speaking. 

708
00:33:35,600 --> 00:33:36,560
You're not. 
No, that's the thing. 

709
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:37,960
Having the crack means having 
fun. 

710
00:33:37,960 --> 00:33:41,640
It's an Irish term CRAIC. 
No, I'm not Irish nor Irish 

711
00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:42,360
coded. 
That's. 

712
00:33:42,360 --> 00:33:43,600
Fair enough. 
Yeah, why would it? 

713
00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:45,280
Not everyone has to know but 
Ireland. 

714
00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:48,560
But you should. 
So I'm going for the banter In, 

715
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:52,760
in, in Manchester. 
And because all summer I'd made 

716
00:33:52,760 --> 00:33:56,440
new efforts, I was approaching 
men and I was going doing it 

717
00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:58,960
with these stickers that I have 
and they say certified heart. 

718
00:33:59,240 --> 00:34:01,240
Oh hell yeah. 
But the men were not 

719
00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:02,560
appreciating it. 
I was out last. 

720
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:03,840
Hell no. 
It was terrible. 

721
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:06,880
I was out last week as well for 
Zook de Liba, the last St. party

722
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:08,880
of the summer. 
And everyone that we met 

723
00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:11,280
happened to be German. 
And none of them were accepting 

724
00:34:11,280 --> 00:34:12,480
of it. 
Like one guy, I literally, I 

725
00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:14,800
went up to him and I was like, 
sorry, I just wanted to give you

726
00:34:14,800 --> 00:34:16,120
this sticker because I think 
you're cute. 

727
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:18,920
And he was like, he was looking 
at it like disgusting. 

728
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:22,719
He was like, yeah, so this is 
awkward. 

729
00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:24,639
Like, what, what should I do 
with it? 

730
00:34:24,639 --> 00:34:27,800
And I was like, nothing, just 
accept it and move on with your 

731
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:29,840
life and feel good that I gave 
you a compliment. 

732
00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:32,440
So my friends and I, we went on 
and I just kind of looked behind

733
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:34,520
to see what the guy had done. 
And he'd taken off the fucking 

734
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:35,880
sticker. 
And I was like. 

735
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:38,679
Fucking Germans. 
Yeah, honestly, and Germans, I 

736
00:34:38,679 --> 00:34:40,760
know it's not all of you, but 
like you're not having the crack

737
00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:41,880
with me. 
Like, do you know what I mean? 

738
00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:43,800
So that's why I'm going to go to
Manchester with it as well. 

739
00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:49,239
So I am actually gone off the 
Berlin boys when I see them they

740
00:34:49,239 --> 00:34:53,960
piss me off because I've tried 
and I have not dated properly 

741
00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:56,480
for months and you don't even 
want to know. 

742
00:34:56,480 --> 00:35:00,440
The last time I had sex I don't 
even remember and I'm just like 

743
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:03,160
it's because I couldn't be 
fucking bothered the the lack of

744
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:05,720
trust. 
Couldn't be fucked nor bothered.

745
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:08,120
I want to be fucked, but I can't
be fucked. 

746
00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:11,800
I actually turned down sex 
during the week. 

747
00:35:11,800 --> 00:35:16,280
But this XX that I had years 
ago, well, he fucking texts me 

748
00:35:16,280 --> 00:35:18,840
at 2:00 PM on a Friday being 
like you at home and I was like,

749
00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:21,800
hello, how are you? 
I'm great, thanks. 

750
00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:23,760
Yes, I am home. 
Come on over. 

751
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:24,960
And I actually kind of fucked 
with him. 

752
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:26,280
I didn't fuck him, but I fucked 
with him. 

753
00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:28,880
So he came over and I was like, 
well, what are you doing here? 

754
00:35:28,880 --> 00:35:31,720
And he was like, I was, I was in
the area. 

755
00:35:31,720 --> 00:35:33,920
He's really indirect, really 
kind of shy guy, but he's hot. 

756
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:36,880
And I was just like, OK, we'll 
sit down, have a cup of tea, 

757
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:38,240
let's talk. 
So we had a little catch up and 

758
00:35:38,240 --> 00:35:40,240
then I was like, it was Friday 
and I was going to Schoonenberg 

759
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,160
to meet friends in the evening. 
And he had said he was coming 

760
00:35:43,160 --> 00:35:46,320
over to this part of town from 
Moby because there were some 

761
00:35:46,320 --> 00:35:48,600
electrical shop that he needed 
to get some for his car with. 

762
00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:50,160
Wink, Wink. 
Yeah, right. 

763
00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:52,560
Exactly. 
And so me being sarcastic, but 

764
00:35:52,560 --> 00:35:54,480
him being from like another 
country, that doesn't get 

765
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:56,760
sarcasm. 
I said to him as a joke on your 

766
00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:58,720
way, will you pick me up a lamp 
from the electric shop? 

767
00:35:59,480 --> 00:36:01,800
And he says to me, oh actually I
didn't need to go. 

768
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:04,200
In the end my friend says he has
the part that I need for the 

769
00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:05,480
car. 
And I was like. 

770
00:36:06,120 --> 00:36:06,840
Yeah, right. 
Yeah. 

771
00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:10,360
Exactly, my guy. 
My guy. 

772
00:36:11,080 --> 00:36:15,360
SO he actually came over, sat on
this couch, we had a catch up, 

773
00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:17,200
he was smacking my ass. 
He was trying to flirt with me. 

774
00:36:17,440 --> 00:36:18,440
And I was like, it's not 
happening. 

775
00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:20,240
And so I got a free lift to 
Schoenberg. 

776
00:36:20,240 --> 00:36:22,080
It would have taken an hour all 
the way for 25 minutes. 

777
00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:23,280
And you got some ass, Max, of 
course, yeah. 

778
00:36:23,360 --> 00:36:24,040
Exactly. 
Do you know? 

779
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:27,480
I know I'm taking it literally. 
I know you mean some Irish 

780
00:36:27,800 --> 00:36:30,520
discussion about like you have 
crack and ask smack. 

781
00:36:31,840 --> 00:36:33,840
You know, he literally did smell
my ass when I was walking by and

782
00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:36,640
I was like you having fun there 
and you know, he was dropping 

783
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:39,440
the hints, but I was like man, 
you've come over if you want me,

784
00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:40,880
grab me. 
Do you know what I mean? 

785
00:36:41,400 --> 00:36:44,360
But he was too shy. 
And in the end anyway, I fucked 

786
00:36:44,360 --> 00:36:48,600
with him and I felt OK about it 
because don't call me up after 

787
00:36:48,600 --> 00:36:51,920
months of not speaking to me and
then suddenly come over 2:00 PM 

788
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:53,200
on a Friday and think you can 
shag me. 

789
00:36:53,880 --> 00:36:55,920
Yeah, also bad timing. 
Also if it. 

790
00:36:55,920 --> 00:36:57,640
Was a Thursday maybe, but 
Fridays? 

791
00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:00,480
Thursdays are my days for having
sex. 

792
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:02,480
Fridays off limits. 
Does he listen to the podcast? 

793
00:37:02,640 --> 00:37:05,400
No, thank God. 
Because not he was going to call

794
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:06,680
you every single Thursday from 
now on. 

795
00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:09,880
No, he wouldn't be fucking 
bother now because he knows now 

796
00:37:09,880 --> 00:37:12,040
that he was made a fool of. 
But to be honest, I wasn't doing

797
00:37:12,040 --> 00:37:15,040
just to make a fool out of but I
was also happy to see him like 

798
00:37:15,040 --> 00:37:17,520
because he's a nice guy but fuck
boy. 

799
00:37:18,520 --> 00:37:20,160
Nice guys are the worst. 
I know. 

800
00:37:20,160 --> 00:37:22,440
Well, yeah, Well, he's nice to a
point, but you know what I mean.

801
00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:25,240
I did. 
I wanted to have a story. 

802
00:37:25,240 --> 00:37:26,800
Like get me into bed with a 
story. 

803
00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:28,600
Don't get me into bed with you 
at home. 

804
00:37:29,240 --> 00:37:30,640
Do you know what I mean? 
DTF, yo. 

805
00:37:30,720 --> 00:37:32,480
Yeah. 
Exactly, fucking gob shite. 

806
00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:34,880
So I'm pissed off at men at the 
moment, couldn't be bothered 

807
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:36,720
with them. 
That is a pattern that I have 

808
00:37:36,720 --> 00:37:38,160
seen. 
Like most of my girlies, they 

809
00:37:38,160 --> 00:37:40,480
are all pissed and they're 
lamenting the fact that they're 

810
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:44,120
straight and I'm like, sucks to 
be you, bitch. 

811
00:37:44,160 --> 00:37:46,000
It's so annoying being straight 
currently. 

812
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:48,560
Like I would love to be gay. 
I have the odd girl crush here 

813
00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:50,800
and there but I've never been 
sexually attracted to women. 

814
00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:52,960
I'm waiting for the right woman 
to find me, to be honest. 

815
00:37:53,800 --> 00:37:56,800
Same thing about men, I have 
made out with a couple of dudes 

816
00:37:56,800 --> 00:37:59,600
but like any approach in the 
emotional or. 

817
00:38:01,160 --> 00:38:02,680
Yeah, and that's fine too. 
Do you know what? 

818
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:04,480
Just that's the way we're built.
But exactly. 

819
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:06,920
I'm glad to hear that you're 
saying that your female friends 

820
00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:08,280
are also getting pissed off. 
Yeah, yeah. 

821
00:38:08,280 --> 00:38:11,680
So it's not only Berlin boys, 
it's also like Sevilla guys, 

822
00:38:11,800 --> 00:38:15,080
Mexico City dudes. 
Well, I'm just gonna pull out 

823
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:18,360
more Paris assholes, London 
cunts. 

824
00:38:18,600 --> 00:38:19,960
Oh no, is that? 
Oh we love the word cunt. 

825
00:38:20,120 --> 00:38:24,560
Oh great. 
So all major cities, it sounds 

826
00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:27,240
like it's the same thing, yeah. 
Yeah, yeah, like the fuck boy, 

827
00:38:27,240 --> 00:38:30,920
ISM is like a virality. 
I've had friends that have sent 

828
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,840
me voice notes crying out out of
frustration and yeah, always 

829
00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:37,600
fucking sucks of like, yo, this 
French guy, he had the body of 

830
00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:39,160
like a professional rugby 
player. 

831
00:38:39,360 --> 00:38:41,920
Things are going well. 
He's calling me my love, 

832
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:43,840
moncherie, all that fucking 
French stuff. 

833
00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:46,280
Again, French guys, red flag. 
But the guy was hot. 

834
00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:48,320
He was smart. 
He was like successful 

835
00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:50,040
financially. 
Like he had like all the check 

836
00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:52,440
boxes that we'll talk about. 
Like we talked about like women 

837
00:38:52,440 --> 00:38:53,920
have so many check boxes. 
It's just men don't have. 

838
00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:57,800
And my friend, she's beautiful. 
She's amazing, great body, 

839
00:38:57,880 --> 00:39:01,440
smart, career driven. 
She's very much monogamous, 

840
00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:03,760
straight looking to build a 
family and a stable 

841
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:05,960
relationship. 
She has her own flat. 

842
00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:09,480
She purchased assets like, yo, 
her life is set. 

843
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:11,840
This dude's life was set. 
Like on paper, this would be 

844
00:39:11,840 --> 00:39:17,400
like power couple, power couple.
The French guy after six months,

845
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:21,040
six months started being like, 
yeah, normal Cherie. 

846
00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:25,560
So maybe the team will get me 
transported to another CT. 

847
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:30,680
And the dude had like Amba like 
a finance stuff so he could find

848
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:32,520
a job and stay in the same city 
as my friend. 

849
00:39:32,920 --> 00:39:37,040
And he just decided to go free 
with the wind and chase his 

850
00:39:37,040 --> 00:39:42,280
dream of being a rugby player. 
And not even like try and be 

851
00:39:42,280 --> 00:39:44,440
like, you know what, I'm gonna 
try and build this. 

852
00:39:44,440 --> 00:39:47,240
I'm gonna try and do this. 
It was like, yeah, no small 

853
00:39:47,240 --> 00:39:50,320
friction happened by. 
And that's another point that 

854
00:39:50,320 --> 00:39:53,200
you've made there, is that 
people do just move around the 

855
00:39:53,200 --> 00:39:55,680
world now. 
You know, we're not stuck in our

856
00:39:55,680 --> 00:39:58,040
farms in Ireland anymore. 
We can actually go wherever the 

857
00:39:58,040 --> 00:40:01,920
fuck we want and we can go away 
for four or five weeks or months

858
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:04,320
at a time with our jobs, work 
from work remotely. 

859
00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:07,000
But people still manage to make 
it work. 

860
00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:10,840
And I have seen so many cases of
long distance, OK, not long term

861
00:40:10,840 --> 00:40:15,000
long distance, but long distance
of one year or two or three or 

862
00:40:15,160 --> 00:40:18,280
semi long distance or medium 
distance, let's say in which 

863
00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:21,360
like, oh, we see each other once
every three months or less or a 

864
00:40:21,360 --> 00:40:23,400
little bit. 
Or then you work a little bit, 

865
00:40:23,400 --> 00:40:26,000
you figure out your life and 
then you just jump boats and go 

866
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:30,040
to whoever's more financially 
stable base is and you see and 

867
00:40:30,040 --> 00:40:32,160
you work it out. 
I think it's not a lack of 

868
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:34,680
trying or an effort because it 
is manageable. 

869
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:37,840
As we said, you move around all 
over the planet, but you as well

870
00:40:37,840 --> 00:40:41,520
can find opportunities all over 
the world, but can very 

871
00:40:41,520 --> 00:40:44,360
privileged because it would 
imply like higher education, 

872
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:46,960
language, passport, power and so
many other things. 

873
00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:49,600
But still, if there is a will, 
there is a way. 

874
00:40:49,960 --> 00:40:53,520
Exactly, exactly. 
Do you think men are in more 

875
00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:56,960
control of who they're dating 
when women are? 

876
00:40:56,960 --> 00:41:00,440
You can't like blanket statement
the whole thing, I know, but do 

877
00:41:00,440 --> 00:41:04,440
you find that from your female 
friends that the men are not 

878
00:41:04,440 --> 00:41:05,640
willing to put in as much 
effort? 

879
00:41:05,640 --> 00:41:11,000
As 100% the the fact of like so 
many of these men in the 

880
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:13,680
different stories of my 
different women, my different. 

881
00:41:13,960 --> 00:41:14,480
Women. 
My women. 

882
00:41:14,560 --> 00:41:18,360
My women, my friends, female 
friends all over the planet 

883
00:41:19,960 --> 00:41:23,600
showcases the same repeating 
pattern of like a lack of effort

884
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:27,520
or a fear of commitment or 
emotional immaturity or so many 

885
00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:29,720
things that you you would think 
they all live in the same 

886
00:41:29,720 --> 00:41:31,680
neighborhood because of the 
repeating patterns. 

887
00:41:32,560 --> 00:41:36,400
While my male friends who are 
single, they have varied 

888
00:41:36,400 --> 00:41:38,160
stories. 
There's like, Oh yeah, I met 

889
00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:40,400
this girl, but things didn't 
work out because of their 

890
00:41:40,400 --> 00:41:42,480
family. 
She was not going oh because her

891
00:41:42,480 --> 00:41:46,400
mental health was not good 
because of like it's not the 

892
00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:49,120
same repeating pattern that I 
see in my female friends which 

893
00:41:49,120 --> 00:41:51,640
is like the dude was kind of 
shitty and flaked on me. 

894
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:55,200
While the times that my male 
friends didn't work out with 

895
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:59,800
other females, it is mostly 
because of like deep entrenched 

896
00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:04,080
stuff or big capital 
incompatibilities that they were

897
00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:06,320
not able to handle. 
Yeah, yeah, it's so fucked. 

898
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:09,400
And what I've noticed as 
well-being 36 now. 

899
00:42:10,280 --> 00:42:12,040
Congratulations. 
Thank you very much. 

900
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:16,440
I don't look a day past 25, but 
so they say, you know, getting 

901
00:42:16,760 --> 00:42:18,920
well, to be fair, when people do
ask me how old I am, and I 

902
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:20,080
always say, how old do you think
I look? 

903
00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:22,560
They're like 2628. 
And I'm like, I'll take that. 

904
00:42:22,920 --> 00:42:25,040
I do the same shit and people 
give me compliments. 

905
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:27,840
It's like, oh, you look like 27.
I'm like, hell yeah. 

906
00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:30,480
How old are you? 
35. 

907
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:33,680
Yeah, same, same difference. 
So, but The thing is, for women 

908
00:42:33,680 --> 00:42:38,080
of of my age, of my vintage, 
what I have a feeling is 

909
00:42:38,080 --> 00:42:41,560
happening now is I'm becoming 
too old for the men my own age. 

910
00:42:42,640 --> 00:42:44,480
The fuck? 
Yeah, a lot of the male friends 

911
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:46,920
that I have who have 
relationships, they're the age 

912
00:42:46,920 --> 00:42:49,880
gap is ranging from six years to
12 years down. 

913
00:42:50,080 --> 00:42:52,200
Yes. 
Oh, that is a fascinating 

914
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:53,960
phenomena. 
I saw a little bit before there 

915
00:42:53,960 --> 00:42:58,360
was like this survey about what 
age people find most attractive 

916
00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:02,000
and they had the female answers 
on this survey. 

917
00:43:02,240 --> 00:43:06,120
And it was like almost like a 
linear correlation between the 

918
00:43:06,120 --> 00:43:08,560
age of a person like a self 
reported age and who they found 

919
00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:11,400
most attractive was like most 
women answering this survey 

920
00:43:11,400 --> 00:43:14,560
would say like guys are 
attractive around my age, give 

921
00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:17,040
or take some years, but it was 
always like very close to them. 

922
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:20,200
And when men when answering the 
same survey, it was like 

923
00:43:20,520 --> 00:43:24,920
consistently every single man in
all age ranges would would 

924
00:43:25,160 --> 00:43:27,960
answer that the most attractive 
women is a women in their 20s. 

925
00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:31,320
Yeah, early 20s I think. 
Early 20s like 252324 and I just

926
00:43:31,320 --> 00:43:34,720
found that shit creepy. 
Yeah, because I had in male 

927
00:43:34,720 --> 00:43:38,560
culture had seen this pattern of
like older dudes dating younger 

928
00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:40,960
girls, older guy finding younger
girls hot and stuff. 

929
00:43:41,240 --> 00:43:45,080
And when I was younger, I was 
afraid of like, wait, I'm in my 

930
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:48,680
20s, will this be my concept of 
attractiveness? 

931
00:43:48,680 --> 00:43:50,800
And when I'm in my 30s, I'm 
going to date 20 year olds. 

932
00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:52,480
And when I'm in my 40s, I'm 
going to date 20 year olds. 

933
00:43:52,840 --> 00:43:57,800
And I got to say, I'm so very 
happy that whenever I see a 20 

934
00:43:57,800 --> 00:44:01,640
year old, I just, I feel 
adorable sense of like, oh 

935
00:44:01,720 --> 00:44:04,400
honey, you're so young. 
Exactly like. 

936
00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:08,040
I found women my age hot. 
Like, that's like what I think 

937
00:44:08,040 --> 00:44:09,680
is interesting. 
If you put me like someone too 

938
00:44:09,680 --> 00:44:12,280
young, I'm like, Oh no. 
But you're emotionally mature by

939
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:14,200
the sounds that you do have your
head screwed on. 

940
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:17,360
You're very welcome. 
No, I mean, you can tell because

941
00:44:18,240 --> 00:44:21,160
I think the 23 year olds are 
attracting. 

942
00:44:21,480 --> 00:44:25,000
Like I said, one of like he's, 
he's, he's in my book, the, the 

943
00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:28,120
book that I wrote, there was 
this guy at the time he was 37. 

944
00:44:28,160 --> 00:44:30,640
We were dating each other. 
So there was I think five years 

945
00:44:30,640 --> 00:44:32,920
between us. 
We were dating for three months 

946
00:44:32,920 --> 00:44:35,040
and he and well, he didn't end 
it. 

947
00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:38,920
Who was something like 17 years 
younger, a 23 year old girl he 

948
00:44:38,920 --> 00:44:40,840
wanted to shag. 
And I was thinking when I first 

949
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:44,400
met him, oh, grade 37 and he'd 
already had to, he has a child. 

950
00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:46,080
So I figured, oh, he'd be a bit 
more mature. 

951
00:44:46,080 --> 00:44:47,960
And he said why? 
Young girls are hot. 

952
00:44:48,040 --> 00:44:51,440
And I'm just like, you're so 
fucking creepy and so like an 

953
00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:55,320
immature cunt like him. 
Of course he wanted to shag a 23

954
00:44:55,320 --> 00:44:56,960
year old because that's his 
mentality. 

955
00:44:56,960 --> 00:44:59,480
Yeah, exactly. 
I'm at my fucking peak lads, let

956
00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:01,560
me tell you. 
Jesus Christ. 

957
00:45:01,560 --> 00:45:05,280
But yeah, so that's what I'm 
finding that at this older age, 

958
00:45:05,280 --> 00:45:07,920
that's why I think I'm not 
getting matches either on, on 

959
00:45:07,920 --> 00:45:10,000
Hinge. 
That's the other issue is that, 

960
00:45:11,120 --> 00:45:14,360
I mean, not not all men, but 
it's just the ones that I'm 

961
00:45:14,360 --> 00:45:16,680
around seem to be fucking dating
super young women. 

962
00:45:16,680 --> 00:45:18,280
And I'm just like, come on, 
Lance. 

963
00:45:18,360 --> 00:45:20,760
You know, it's gross. 
I mean, I don't know. 

964
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:22,440
It's not that it's gross. 
It's just is it? 

965
00:45:22,440 --> 00:45:25,280
Is it necessary? 
Yeah, I think on a case by case 

966
00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:28,440
basis you could analyze if it's 
gross or not, but I think it is 

967
00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:32,040
gross as a pattern, the fact 
that it is such a consistent 

968
00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:34,640
thing because, yeah, on an 
individual cases, there's got to

969
00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:37,480
be relationships out there of 
like huge age gaps, which is 

970
00:45:37,480 --> 00:45:40,080
just like a beautiful love story
of two emotionally mature people

971
00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:42,240
that just they found love in a 
hopeless place. 

972
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:45,400
But on a trend level, it is just
creepy. 

973
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:48,800
The fact that you find like 
40-50 year olds, 60 year olds 

974
00:45:48,800 --> 00:45:53,440
just being like all flirty with 
like a 23 year old, that's like,

975
00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:55,360
dude, they could be your 
granddaughter and you're 

976
00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:56,960
thinking about sticking your 
Dick in there. 

977
00:45:56,960 --> 00:45:58,880
Yeah, it's disgusting. 
I don't like it. 

978
00:45:58,880 --> 00:46:01,320
But look, we can't change men. 
But you know what? 

979
00:46:01,320 --> 00:46:04,240
Would you? 
Change about men. 

980
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:09,680
Yeah, like, like, like, like 
what is your give the men who 

981
00:46:09,680 --> 00:46:12,240
are listening, which is really 
only 30% of my listeners. 

982
00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:14,920
Hey, 30% is better than 0%. 
Well, this is it. 

983
00:46:14,920 --> 00:46:16,760
There's a couple of you out 
there listening, but like, do 

984
00:46:16,760 --> 00:46:19,200
you have advice for men that are
dating out there so that like 

985
00:46:19,880 --> 00:46:24,600
are struggling to find 
relationships even though we're 

986
00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:26,920
living in this city full of 
choice, full of beautiful 

987
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:28,320
people? 
So many beautiful. 

988
00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:31,680
People, so many, and there's a 
lot of men I believe out there 

989
00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:34,520
who are eligible and all that 
who are actually finding it 

990
00:46:34,520 --> 00:46:38,400
difficult to find relationships.
I think that is a huge thing 

991
00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:42,560
that we as a society need to let
go and not settle for less, but 

992
00:46:42,560 --> 00:46:46,000
learn that relationships are 
built through pain, through 

993
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:49,920
discomfort, and yeah, it's part 
of human life. 

994
00:46:49,920 --> 00:46:55,160
Pause for clapping yay thank you
for saying that Clap clap clap 

995
00:46:55,160 --> 00:46:58,120
clap clap sorry relationships 
are built through discomfort, 

996
00:46:58,120 --> 00:47:00,400
pain and. 
Time and patience. 

997
00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:02,840
Thank you. 
Yeah. 

998
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:05,240
And also compatibility and good 
matches. 

999
00:47:05,240 --> 00:47:07,120
But no one's gonna be perfect 
for anyone. 

1000
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,720
I would say. 
Like, my advice for all the guys

1001
00:47:10,720 --> 00:47:13,800
out there. 
Sup, fellas, What the fuck? 

1002
00:47:15,840 --> 00:47:17,640
I guess like the same. 
I don't know, advice. 

1003
00:47:17,640 --> 00:47:20,160
Like the same comment that I 
made with you about like me on 

1004
00:47:20,160 --> 00:47:22,160
my dating profile is just to be 
genuine. 

1005
00:47:22,160 --> 00:47:24,960
Be yourself. 
I think so many people are 

1006
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:28,680
trying to become an appeasing 
product in this meat market that

1007
00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:32,520
we call dating and oh God, I'm 
going to use business terms. 

1008
00:47:32,760 --> 00:47:35,560
You have to have a good product 
market fit. 

1009
00:47:36,040 --> 00:47:38,880
So you got to have you yourself 
as a OK. 

1010
00:47:38,880 --> 00:47:40,600
Humans are much more valuable 
than a product. 

1011
00:47:40,600 --> 00:47:43,000
So this is a metaphor, not a 
real advice. 

1012
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:46,400
Please don't sue me on this. 
People should know what their 

1013
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:49,520
qualities are, what their 
tastes, what they like, what 

1014
00:47:49,520 --> 00:47:53,080
they desire and be as open and 
as honest as possible, even if 

1015
00:47:53,520 --> 00:47:55,360
what they like is not so 
mainstream. 

1016
00:47:55,360 --> 00:47:59,600
If you like, I don't know, 
role-playing and this and you 

1017
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:04,080
enjoy books that are have pink 
covers, whatever, showcase that 

1018
00:48:04,080 --> 00:48:06,400
on every single platform, be as 
honest as possible. 

1019
00:48:06,400 --> 00:48:10,000
And then you would just create a
natural filter of whoever will 

1020
00:48:10,000 --> 00:48:13,120
vibe with you has seen like, oh,
little loves the color pink. 

1021
00:48:13,120 --> 00:48:15,600
I love the color pink. 
Hell yeah, let's let's start a 

1022
00:48:15,600 --> 00:48:18,280
conversation instead of like, my
favorite color is red. 

1023
00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:22,320
I hate pink but you know that. 
So you're not showing any pink 

1024
00:48:22,320 --> 00:48:24,360
in your profiles and they're 
like 3 months down the line they

1025
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:26,280
show, they see all your pink and
yo show. 

1026
00:48:26,920 --> 00:48:28,960
Yeah, and then you just like 
lied the whole. 

1027
00:48:28,960 --> 00:48:30,400
Time. 
Yeah, no, I just saw that 

1028
00:48:30,440 --> 00:48:31,960
showing all your. 
Pink, pink I was. 

1029
00:48:32,560 --> 00:48:34,960
Like oh oh oh sorry, wasn't that
my expected? 

1030
00:48:35,800 --> 00:48:37,920
We know what you mean because 
you were referring to colors 

1031
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:38,840
into books. 
Exactly. 

1032
00:48:38,840 --> 00:48:41,720
So it's like that. 
Just be yourself as much as 

1033
00:48:41,720 --> 00:48:44,440
possible and don't be afraid of 
scaring away people. 

1034
00:48:45,120 --> 00:48:48,280
That's a great one. 
Don't be afraid to admit very 

1035
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:51,400
early on what you want, even 
even if that does scare someone 

1036
00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:52,400
away, because it's like, well, 
great. 

1037
00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:54,160
I've just told him on the second
day I'm actually looking for a 

1038
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:55,480
relationship and he's goes with 
me. 

1039
00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:56,960
Good. 
Well, I haven't wasted six 

1040
00:48:56,960 --> 00:48:59,640
months of my life because I've 
had that where I had this guy 

1041
00:49:00,280 --> 00:49:02,840
was so besotted with him that I 
couldn't tell him for three 

1042
00:49:02,840 --> 00:49:04,560
months like that. 
I wanted to be his girlfriend. 

1043
00:49:04,560 --> 00:49:07,200
And then when I finally did, 
he's the guy who I've mentioned 

1044
00:49:07,200 --> 00:49:10,120
before and he said, this is the 
guy that came up to me on Friday

1045
00:49:10,120 --> 00:49:13,040
last week. 
That's the guy that said no, I 

1046
00:49:13,040 --> 00:49:15,480
don't want us to be boyfriend, 
girlfriend because I don't want 

1047
00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:17,240
to feel pain for when we break 
up. 

1048
00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:19,640
And I said. 
Oh fuck that guy. 

1049
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:21,280
Right. 
So we've been three months, we 

1050
00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:25,360
had been three months exclusive 
and still like, so that's the 

1051
00:49:25,360 --> 00:49:26,720
fucking idiot now that I fucked 
with. 

1052
00:49:27,440 --> 00:49:29,200
Yeah, totally. 
I mean, I would ever let him 

1053
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:31,000
walk in that door. 
Come on, I'll waste your time on

1054
00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:33,560
a Friday afternoon. 
I was actually, I literally he 

1055
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:35,600
was over for 30 minutes. 
I got a free lift off him to 

1056
00:49:35,760 --> 00:49:37,480
Schoonenberg. 
It worked out perfectly. 

1057
00:49:41,560 --> 00:49:44,280
Hey, well, Leo, let's wrap it up
on a bit of dating advice. 

1058
00:49:44,280 --> 00:49:47,520
Even though you were already 
giving us loads, just give one. 

1059
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:48,960
Wait, wait, I'm giving loads, 
no. 

1060
00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:51,400
Well, you you'd given loads of. 
Hopefully that part recorded the

1061
00:49:51,400 --> 00:49:53,320
part. 
That it was like a bad joke 

1062
00:49:53,320 --> 00:49:54,400
about giving. 
Loads. 

1063
00:49:55,920 --> 00:49:59,840
Sorry, I have a very dirty mind.
Me too, but I'm here for like, I

1064
00:49:59,840 --> 00:50:01,200
did not recognize that. 
Dammit. 

1065
00:50:02,240 --> 00:50:03,840
Give us a bit of daily advice 
for somebody who's new to 

1066
00:50:03,840 --> 00:50:06,560
Berlin. 
I think for Burling newbies, it 

1067
00:50:06,560 --> 00:50:10,680
would be like, again, as always,
be genuine who you are and what 

1068
00:50:10,680 --> 00:50:13,440
you're looking for, but also be 
open to go outside of your 

1069
00:50:13,440 --> 00:50:15,760
comfort zone. 
I mean, maybe you're not into 

1070
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:19,000
the king scene, but just go 
there for once with preferably a

1071
00:50:19,000 --> 00:50:21,680
group of people that knows or 
like a friend that knows a 

1072
00:50:21,680 --> 00:50:24,040
little bit about it. 
So that way you like know the 

1073
00:50:24,040 --> 00:50:27,720
outfits you can get in 
effortlessly and just see the 

1074
00:50:27,720 --> 00:50:29,680
scene and enjoy. 
Like I have taken a lot of 

1075
00:50:29,680 --> 00:50:31,840
friends to Kit Kat and some 
friends even refer me as like, 

1076
00:50:31,840 --> 00:50:34,760
oh, Leo is the guide of Kit Kat 
and I'm like, yo-yo, yo chill. 

1077
00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:36,560
No, I've been there a couple of 
times. 

1078
00:50:36,560 --> 00:50:39,760
I have fun, but I am in no way 
any experience nor any 

1079
00:50:39,760 --> 00:50:42,120
reference. 
So do not consider me like that.

1080
00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:44,000
But I just go. 
I have fun and I like to bring 

1081
00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:45,040
friends, but I've never been 
there. 

1082
00:50:45,040 --> 00:50:47,120
And it's like give them a little
bit of a warning. 

1083
00:50:47,120 --> 00:50:49,440
If you have never seen someone 
sticks or Dicks out, you might 

1084
00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:51,520
see it. 
People are fucking some people. 

1085
00:50:52,120 --> 00:50:55,120
It's going to happen. 
Respect people's boundaries and 

1086
00:50:55,120 --> 00:50:57,640
at the same time just go and see
if you like it and if you don't,

1087
00:50:57,800 --> 00:51:00,320
you had a good time. 
So I think I'll just push people

1088
00:51:00,320 --> 00:51:04,560
to go outside of their comfort 
zone, Try a different gender, go

1089
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:07,760
to a sex positive party, be 
responsible with your body. 

1090
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:10,520
So not condoning like 
overconsumption of any 

1091
00:51:10,520 --> 00:51:12,040
substances, alcohol, drugs, 
whatever. 

1092
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:16,520
No, but just push yourself out 
there a little bit and just be 

1093
00:51:16,520 --> 00:51:18,560
bold with life. 
Because I think like Berlin out 

1094
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:24,520
of all places is a city that has
so many avenues for you to find 

1095
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:27,120
yourself but also so many places
for you to lose yourself. 

1096
00:51:28,680 --> 00:51:31,400
That if you take it with 
caution, I think you can learn 

1097
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:34,200
so much about yourself and 
others and that can help you 

1098
00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:36,040
make better decisions about your
life. 

1099
00:51:36,360 --> 00:51:41,440
But also it is such a playground
of drugs and excess that you can

1100
00:51:41,440 --> 00:51:44,480
just lose yourself. 
And we all know if you go to 

1101
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:48,160
like 3 weekends in a row to like
Berkheim, you would see the 

1102
00:51:48,280 --> 00:51:50,880
regulars, quote UN quote, which 
you can find a spectrum of 

1103
00:51:50,880 --> 00:51:52,040
people. 
But so many people that are 

1104
00:51:52,040 --> 00:51:55,040
regulars on on clubs in the city
are just people running away 

1105
00:51:55,040 --> 00:51:59,640
from reality one pill at a time 
and one DJ set at a time instead

1106
00:51:59,640 --> 00:52:02,160
of just going and having fun. 
No, they're running away from 

1107
00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:04,320
their trauma. 
So it's like people go to 

1108
00:52:04,320 --> 00:52:06,360
therapy. 
I will say that's the first 

1109
00:52:06,360 --> 00:52:07,920
dating advice. 
Why I said this at the end? 

1110
00:52:07,920 --> 00:52:10,560
No. 
Go to therapy then do everything

1111
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:12,760
else. 
Literally exactly because you 

1112
00:52:12,760 --> 00:52:14,120
actually need to be mentally 
equipped. 

1113
00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:18,360
Berlin is not for the faint 
hearted and I've experienced 

1114
00:52:18,360 --> 00:52:20,320
this with a new friend that I 
had made. 

1115
00:52:20,320 --> 00:52:22,960
She's actually, she said 
herself, Berlin has chewed her 

1116
00:52:22,960 --> 00:52:24,400
up and spat her out so she had 
to go home. 

1117
00:52:24,600 --> 00:52:27,400
She's only here for six months. 
Do you have to be a bit hard? 

1118
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:30,600
In my opinion, because I was a 
bit of a little bit of a hard 

1119
00:52:30,600 --> 00:52:32,760
bitch coming here, but I'm an 
even harder bitch now because 

1120
00:52:32,800 --> 00:52:36,320
Berlin has made me very tough 
because you have to deal with a 

1121
00:52:36,320 --> 00:52:39,400
lot of challenges. 
There's a lot, there's a lot of 

1122
00:52:39,400 --> 00:52:42,200
bumps in the Berlin Rd. 
I would say that Berlin has made

1123
00:52:42,200 --> 00:52:44,400
me softer, actually. 
Oh my God. 

1124
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:46,920
Yeah, I don't know. 
I mean, again, male privilege 

1125
00:52:46,920 --> 00:52:50,520
speaking out of here, but Berlin
has made me more connected with 

1126
00:52:50,520 --> 00:52:54,040
my emotions, has made me more 
open to bond with people, has 

1127
00:52:54,040 --> 00:52:56,920
made me more soft and loving and
caring. 

1128
00:52:57,400 --> 00:52:59,280
I mean, wait, not putting all 
that stuff on Berlin. 

1129
00:52:59,280 --> 00:53:01,440
It's also like so many things I 
was doing like on my own inner 

1130
00:53:01,440 --> 00:53:04,080
works, but still. 
But you're also only here like 

1131
00:53:04,080 --> 00:53:05,840
less than six months. 
But I've been jumping. 

1132
00:53:05,840 --> 00:53:09,000
I mean, I've been jumping and 
staying here for like extended 

1133
00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:11,160
periods of time, I would say 
like a year and a half. 

1134
00:53:11,320 --> 00:53:13,320
Okay, yeah. 
This is not my first rodeo. 

1135
00:53:13,360 --> 00:53:15,040
Is I my first rodeo? 
Right. 

1136
00:53:15,040 --> 00:53:16,360
Well, look, we're gonna wrap it 
up there. 

1137
00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:19,720
Thank you so much for coming on.
You were a great fun guest and a

1138
00:53:19,720 --> 00:53:23,280
great storyteller. 
Thank you so much, had a blast. 

1139
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:25,280
I would love to come again if 
that is a possibility. 

1140
00:53:25,320 --> 00:53:27,080
Sure, maybe if this recording 
folks. 

1141
00:53:28,680 --> 00:53:31,560
Yeah, like, Oh yeah, half of the
stories got burned away in the 

1142
00:53:31,560 --> 00:53:33,880
void of zeros and ones of this 
platform. 

1143
00:53:34,080 --> 00:53:36,360
Oh God, fingers crossed. 
Thanks so much for listening. 

1144
00:53:36,360 --> 00:53:38,320
And of course, if you 2 want to 
come on, you can get in touch 

1145
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:40,640
just as Leo did actually on 
Instagram, a 

1146
00:53:40,640 --> 00:53:45,160
datinginberlin_oryoucanemailmeadatinginberlinbook@gmail.com
thank. 

1147
00:53:45,160 --> 00:53:46,760
You and we'll see you next week 
bye. 

1148
00:53:47,640 --> 00:53:51,000
Waves camera. 
I was not engaging with the 

1149
00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:52,840
camera throughout the pod 
because I was engaging with you 

1150
00:53:52,840 --> 00:53:53,440
as a human.