Welcome to no latency, sidequest a bonus podcast, for our
listeners with special guests, and side Adventures, that affect
the main story of no latency this time as a treat for the
winter season. We're seeing what Remy really
wants for Christmas with our special guest stars, Miss
magitek and Jean the wise along for the ride.
We hope you enjoy this. Oh, latency winter Adventure.
So, let's join them. This winter season in night
city. Are you ready?
Remy. It's a cold December night and
you're sitting in the bar at no latency and ping comes over to
the booth that you like to sit in your right retro?
Yeah, I'm fine. Just I could probably use
another drink. This one's only half for sure.
Thank you. It's not many people around
tonight. Do you Coming to turn on TV.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, put some liveliness. Then ping looks at the TV.
Their eyes Flash. And it turns on
The season last night saw the first of two Animal, Auctions,
pets and Wildlife were sold rescued tonight.
Cities underground, Elite including to cybertek reindeer
and a duck of all things. Of animals and pets.
And we here at channel 54, believe him.
In other news, didn't catch continues to swing through the
streets. Continuing the delay of any cat
related content on the broad way of night City cats, get away
from that tree. A Christmas special looks like
it's canceled this year. Biotechnical left.
No comment at this time I guess this Christmas isn't going to be
perfect. Once again, this is network 54
and I'm April Anonymous Up on the Rooftop reindeer Paws and
that is an unscheduled break and will be taken out of their
paychecks just kidding. Reindeer aren't paid, Merry
Christmas to all and to all a productive work week.
You should drink, Remy, hey, maybe some music instead.
Then they stole my duck. The fucker took my duck.
Wait that son of a bitch stole my duck.
I need another drink. Sorry.
I'll pay for the guys. I mean I mean it's fine.
Like it's not a big deal. I'll just uh I'll go get you
another drink. Doc, what are you saying
shouting about the fucking collector?
Stole my God? Duck.
Oh, man. Great, you got a duck.
Get stranger. You remember when I had my duck
for Halloween, right? Oh yeah.
After all, that was like a cardboard cutout or something?
No, it was my own duck. I went to the duck.
Pond. I befriended a duck.
We named each other. I named her mama Mallard she
named me quack. It's how it works.
All right. Well, I'd say that's weird but I
say meow lat. So good for you.
Oh by the way and I'll hand them to vials of kitten cash.
Oh shit. Hey Remy, you're a good man.
I'm gonna go do something completely unrelated right now.
He like, opens one of the canisters and starts to take
some. Don't play with your ball of
yarn out here. Hey, don't you just my younger?
Sir. Nice, guys off into his little
of it and pink comes with Another drink, don't like this
one. I promise, I promise, I'ma keep
it safe, but how in the streets of night City, there are two
people walking around and actually having kind of a
trouble trying to find the bar Terminus and press you turn into
an Alleyway and there in front of you is a shop called crystals
by Joy, okay, I'm now I'm lost now, I'm lost.
It is right here on the agent, that's what they gave me.
Is it's a crystal place, it's obviously not a Merc bar or
whatever. They said it was going to be,
let's just go home. It said it was here.
It has to be here. I don't understand.
Press Romeo perception check perception.
All right first 16, oh yeah, that's enough.
As you're looking around, you notice the No No latency logo.
It's just stuck to the door. Hold up, hold up Terminus look
there it is there what I gotta catch up It's a board.
We haven't even started our night.
We're not even in a bar, yet. This is how third one I've done
tonight. So you need to catch up with me.
So what was it here? I found it.
I, you are ready to give up. You were ready to give up.
Within three seconds here, I see the logo.
Let's I think we, I think we have to just go in.
You take the lead, all right? And it better be fun.
Okay, this time not like the last contract that you made us.
Do. So boring.
I mean, go hack a little execs computer, to take some pictures
from him, blah blah, but we've done it a million times bris.
I don't know what you're looking for.
Something something fun. Something thrilling.
Something we want to make a name for myself in this city.
Why not? Just something that's pays good.
Why do you want to get yourself killed?
Eddie's boring. All right, let's just go in this
place. Okay, okay, okay, so I'm going
to just kind of walk To toward I, guess I will walk into this
building where I see the logo. Well, you walk into the door as
you open the door, the little shop Bell pings and out from the
cashier's desk pops, a very hippie looking woman, little
name, badge that says joy. Oh oh, hi.
We are looking for no latency. Oh um, not at the bar.
It's not We have imitation. We were right.
We're both invited. Pull up my agent.
I'm like, trying to find. I skulking through haven't told
me what to do when people ask about the bar, it's really quite
stressful. I'm a terrible front for it.
Just don't press the third button on the vending machine
and and it really got to give me something to say to people.
I'm sorry. Do you want to crystallize?
I actually do sell this shit. Well, it's very pretty, but No,
that's no that's fine. Just just use the vending
machine. I guess I'm gonna have to go
drink. You thank you very much,
Terminus heads up to the vending machine and just like perusing.
Looking at the different things. Do I want to get some smash?
It doesn't actually have anything in it.
It's just a door. Sorry.
Okay. Press is the third button for
the record. I'm bad at this.
You see them sort of like slightly having a bit of a
stress in this store as the door, cut quite heavily
screeches open, and there's a staircase down.
You guys head on down the staircase and as you enter the
door at the bottom of the staircase you enter into,
honestly, one of the coolest bars you've ever seen and it
looks fairly new in construction, there are a bunch
of booths around there is a square bar in the middle of the
room a bit, like the A old 21st Century television show.
Cheers. And there's a bar person apps
that bar bald quite tall and lies.
Very simple, minimalist clothing.
And they look at you and smile. Oh my God.
Press this place is cool. See, I told you only you had it,
I know you had it in you, you just have to be patient
sometimes. Hello, drinks.
I mean, we are a bar, it's nice. Yeah issue.
I'm, I'm ping. Give an invitation or do we have
to kill you? She pulls out.
Press calls out, her agent invitation, yes.
Oh good. And I'm kidding.
Of course, but please sit down. What would you like to drink?
Well, what do you got everything?
And oh, they look to the side and smoke.
I'll have a dirty martini. You got it, and they stopped
making it. Old-fashioned.
Please with a flourish of a wrist.
They set up an old fashioned as well.
But them down at the bar. First drinks on me.
What do you need? Goodness, never been treated
this way in a place. Like what is this place?
You said you didn't stink? Yep.
Okay. Ping, do you mind telling me why
I've never heard of a place like this living in night City?
All my life. You had a dominant.
Yeah, the missing fixer? Yeah, this was dominoes place.
When they left town, I took over with the mission left town.
I thought they were killed. Can I show you doing everything
in my power to get Domino back? But that's, that's a bigger
project. All right.
Well hey, thanks for the hospitality.
Yeah. But you don't really make a lot
of money as a bar. You make money in other ways,
you know? Yeah, yeah.
I know a lot about that. Actually, me and my friend here,
you know, why don't you press, why don't you tell this?
Ping person. You know what we do here?
What will we do in night City? We work.
We have quite a reputation, we have a list of references.
If you need them, many high up people.
And many executive chains we are looking for work.
Really is why we're here and that's why you have an
invitation then yes, yes. Well the only issue is It's, you
know, Christmas. So there's not a lot of work
around. Yes, that's true. - he's noticed
sighs. In defeat?
I mean, I don't even have my regular crew today.
I've just got that guy. Hey, what is it, retro?
I need another Margarita, but this time I need it sugared with
Seth Coke. Got it retro.
Thank you. Excuse me.
For one second, here. Press, I know I'm on the catch.
But do you see some dude with a TV head over there?
It's not just me hallucinate. Yes, no, you're you're accurate.
Your eyes are accurate. It's a person.
The head is a TV. Yes, it seems to be that way.
Okay. Don't don't stare too much that
okay, route. As long as you see it too.
Yes. Sorry.
Excuse me. Sorry about that.
You're introducing your friend, the Division.
It's Retro, Retro. It is some quite honking you.
Drinking old looking TV. I agree.
Metro will come up to the bar shoulders, just hunched down.
Very, you know, Melancholy just took my God damn duck.
I'm very much on drugs right now, so I need to know.
Is this sad TV sad about a duck? Yeah.
Okay. You know, press I think you're
right. Maybe I should just lay low on
the catch a little bit. I've been doing its Terminus
like Trails off, kind of concerned.
Yeah, the catch to uh someone doing downcast strange.
It pops his head out the door. Y'all.
Damn it. What's going on?
Hey, you ready? Do we do we kill those people
think. I know they have an invitation.
All right, that's the meat. Meow.
Hello right now. Nope, too much.
I need to go lie down. You two, have a great meow.
All right, I'm gonna go. This place is stored leaves.
There are new terms that I'm learning tonight that I've never
heard before kitchen. Catch, ya?
See press you've been on the jobs too long.
You're not cool. Like a sir, right?
I'm cool. I'm in the streets, I'm
understanding. What's going on on night City.
So here's what we're gonna do, REM is going to pull out an
unlabeled vile. And you, look, I got some home.
Brew kit and cash right here. If we want, Terminus has a vial
in his hand. Two and then he immediately puts
it back in his pocket he said you home brew you say yeah I did
it myself. Got it directly from bio
Technica oh my God press this is it if you're ever going to do it
this is it. This is the time to do it Priss.
Hi I think I will pass it's she's so boring.
So boring please I will partake. Here you go.
Would you like me to resist torture?
Absolutely, I'm scared. Are we gonna lose Terminus?
No, he made this, he made this kitten catch in a plastic bag,
the street Terminus, you know, waves it around his nose a
little bit. And then then, you know, takes
it in takes a hit and rolls a 17.
Very much, you're fine. But you do now have to make a
cat based pun at some point. Oh, okay.
Okay. You're not Afflicted with having
to do it all the time. Just want to show.
Show show. Let me ask your new friend.
Are you feel lining good? I'm actually sorry.
Yeah, you're right. I felt like something like
something was in there but out it never mind.
That's just the hair. Ball effect.
It's just a drip. It's good.
Oh man this is good stuff. Listen TV person Remy.
You said yep. Retro Remy.
Remy retro. Either ones.
Fine with me. Okay.
Listen. I like you and I like the cut of
your jib and I really like your kitten catch.
So why don't you tell us everything?
You know about this amazing beautiful place and how we can
find some work. I need to get my duck back.
All right. How do I get my duck back,
retro? You know, everyone gets a favor
for Christmas. Yes.
I do now. Okay.
And you know how normally you'd like?
Eat crap. So no and then Del and like, put
up with jab and you'd go on an adventure and you get what you
want. They're not here.
No, because they are people to celebrate the holidays with.
Yeah, because you're a sad motherfucker.
He's a bummer, huh? Yeah, I'll tell you what, I'll
do if you want. I'll hire these two people.
To help you get your dog back and that'll be a Christmas gift
done. Okay first I have a question now
is is a duck, a euphemism for something.
This is a you know, it's the name of the new ganger that
we're going to eyesore. No.
It's an actual duck specifically a non cybernetic duck real.
The real animal. Yeah quack quack.
Wow that Cracker that is yes that is actually very valuable
then. Yes.
That's why the collector sold it, you gotta be kidding me.
A nice. But how can you put a price tag
on friendship on a man to animal bonding?
So you became attached to the duck.
That's what it is. We are attached to each other.
It was ripped away from me. I miss mr.
Smith that son of a bitch. I'm gonna.
What about that? You lost it and he just ripped
saw it as an opportunity to replace.
I would never misplace Mama Mallard, how dare you Pang But
all right if you if you have an idea how to get my duck back
pain, please let me know. How do I get that?
I don't forget get them back. Do you know the last place that
the duck was? Didn't the news say that it was
sold last night in an auction at the collector mansion?
That's right. So we had to go to collector
Mansion collector Mansion fuck. Can I do a local expert to know
if I have heard about this person or where they are?
Please. Yeah.
Okay. That is a 16 16 is good enough.
The Collector is a fixer that does a lot of night markets and
midnight markets, like a lot of them and they're very famous for
being one of the few people in the Underworld of night City,
who sells to the top-end Corpus their mansion is this opulent
very, it used to be filled with these gold and guys called
Steve's that went a bit wrong. So now they're filled with a
different gods but everything's like fancy.
See fountain in the front, that's actually using
holographic water, big open doors, classical music playing.
When you go in to view your items, secret vault underground
and very famously was one of the events in Domino disappearing.
So immediately Terminus, you just see a singular tear go down
his cheek as he says, this is it, this is the one, this is it
press. We're going to a big extravagant
mansion and we're breaking in. And what are we stealing a duck?
This is what you are looking for.
This is what I've been looking for.
This is it, it must be a Christmas miracle then because I
will say that I am actually quite intrigued by this job,
especially because it's a live animal.
I don't think I've actually seen a live animal since I was a
child. I-i'm, just curious to see it
myself. This is very valuable.
To think I almost ignored your call.
What else are you going to do? On a holiday season time.
You have no friends except me, far inferior kitten.
Catch. That's what I was going to be
doing. Well, new friends.
Let us heed this call of Christmas and go get my goddamn
duck. Havana White.
You have much cyber deck. Oh yeah.
You guys follow retro. He's not going to the bathroom
or anything like the vehicles over there, and they're pointing
away from the door to like just a door in the back.
So before we go on this extravagant Journey right to The
Collector Mansion I, you said you'd be willing to pay us.
Yes, how much we talking here? Oh, let's forget about that
part. You're just ready to go on this
Mission without asking the payment terms.
We need a contract. We need to get everything in.
That you're here. Yeah.
So boring. What's your normal rate?
Look, you go figure that out. All right.
And Terminus stands up and he just hits the Dance Floor.
Oh my God. You're dancing with like it.
See people stranger comes out and goes old dancing now.
And he dances like a dad and somehow manages to dance out of
rhythm at every moment and it's incredibly unnerving.
I'm down with my bad self. I've got the angel, do you have
a lot of money? I live in the back of up or not
even a good Mark, anyway, whatever.
So what's your price for the two of us?
I would say. Let's go with 5,000 5,000.
Each five thousand each. I mean, it is Christmas.
Normally, I do three and a half four, but it is for reme Remy.
Mmm, forget that I got your Christmas gift, right?
Mmm. And there's a thousand up front,
okay? That would be perfect.
And we usually do, we usually deal in contracts?
I don't know if you have some sort of like it's a ping pulls
out a tile from their pocket and they press their thumb on the
screen and contract appears and to sign it.
You also have to put your thumbprint on, okay?
So press will just review the terms as she always does.
And if everything is agreeable, she will sign.
It's a very basic contract. Act because they just wrote it
up. So it just says will help.
Retro get duck, will pay 5,000. Get the rest of this money.
As long as you don't die, which is what it says at the bottom
Fair. All right, she'll side hater -
yeah, I need you to sign this. All right, come in and make sure
you get paid, I secure that. Look, I got us some good money.
Okay. That is like fine.
As you look down, you see that? You're both going to get 5
grand. Terminus just looks at the money
looks at the number and like covers one eye and goes like is
that 500 or is, is that, was it that the five to five thousand
four forces. He just puts a big X on the
signature spot. It's a thumbprint, I think I
messed up your machine. He puts his thumb.
All right, well, that contract signed should I email You a
receipt? Yes, that would be lovely,
price-wise Flash and you feel you're your own Communicator
vibrate. You assume that that's terrific,
Perfect. All right, then now we can make
our way to this collector Mansion.
Not that way follow retro. Yeah.
Well me and Remy wolf down the rest of his drink sniff whatever
Cokie can off of the rim. Put the glass in his pocket and
walk right out to Vanna, White retro walks to the back of their
bar and opens a door and kind of beckons you to in.
And as you look through, there's a there's a white VW bus sitting
inside this room. Wow, does everything about this
place is just amazing. I love it.
It's I'm not sure what to think of it all press.
This is nice, Just Go With It, embrace it.
Yes, yes, embrace it. Sure I will do my best retro
Gibson turns on Vanna, White turns on some classic Christmas
pop-punk jams and gets ready to go.
Retro beckons you to into the van.
I a shotgun. I'll sit in the back press as
you get into the back. You realize that the backs
really comfy because it's got a nice big bench seat because it's
a v-dub bus. And you also noticed you're
right. That there's a undeployed turret
built into this van in the back so you could climb into it and
shoot from it. And the right this is cool and
as you're in it, retro hits garage door opener and the van
starts to rise up. And it opens up through the
street as the doors, open in the street, to a secret elevator for
than a Wait and that away drives off.
It closes you drive through the streets of night City.
The Silo and retro show is recorded in front of a live
studio audience. Join Sano and retro.
The oddest couple in night City exclusively on our patreon at
patreon.com forward slash no. Latency is my bed made.
Microwave isn't working can you talk to it?
What will these to get up to next?
I don't know why you keep sticking your Anger in that
part. That's not a bowling ball.
Oh God. Remy.
Do you head straight to the collector mention?
Yes I don't think there's anything else for me to stop
for. All right?
You guys head straight to the collector mansion and as you get
to the front of the collector mentioned, there's the opulent
beautiful Fountain. Front is spewing water in
Christmas colors is Christmas trees in the front yard, and
there are two big silver. Bodied.
Men covered in cybertek standing outside the front and A sign
that says animal auction night to and more option than to,
okay, can we do some research on what happened on night one?
What kind of people showed up there?
Sure. Do you want to do that, by
asking people inside, would you check the local network?
Yeah, I want to check the local net, like, do a library search
like basically Google it? Yeah.
Okay. I mean local expert, another
1717 you discover some information, okay?
And all these people, the I'm assuming they were invited or is
this a public forum? It is an invited place.
You can also buy a ticket, okay, gotcha.
So get this guy's looking through the garden pages and
some information looks like night.
One was a big success, they have people from arisaka
biotechnical. I mean, you name it all the big
letters but they also had tuner. I don't know if you guys like
the fish. Oh tuna.
Sorry, Luna was here. There's a smudge.
On my on my agent tuna. Okay.
Well hmm. Alright, tuna was here, who was
Tuna? June has this mechanic that
Jeb's Ganda scene has done a couple jobs for it's not.
All right guy, I'm really got to know him too.
Well, I'm going to give him a call.
See if he has anything to say about night one.
That's a good idea. I'm gonna check my tile and see
if I got Tunas contact information.
You do ring a ling. A ling, tuna act, casual.
All right. Turn up.
No do not retro. Oh, where are we?
Oh, yeah. That's gone.
All right, Hey, listen. So, you know, it's almost
Christmastime, right? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Same to you, Sandy. You Father.
Christmas and all Tommy. I just found out recently that
the collector is doing a sale for animals and, oh, yeah.
Oh, you were there. Awesome.
Tell me, are they selling any, like, cute animals, like,
rabbits? Ask - it was it sold, was it
salt? Was it what was it?
Like a cybernetic or like true duck or dark completely like
fresh? We might have been like a quote
or something but he was quite as but literally you know anyone by
that one yet? Oh yeah.
I mean I but literally everyone in the room that bead on it, I
mean I did but I didn't win. You know why?
They're bringing to the collector, mention before Doug
you? Yeah, I've been to the collector
Mansion before but you know, how people like to talk sometimes
people? You know.
It's funny because I don't know, story say say well there's money
in it, money won't get my money. Tell you, what do you know
anybody who do? You know, anyone who seemed the
most likely to have? Probably one are gonna be one of
these Where the high rollers because I mean, look, I'm on my
own. My own shop by double our money.
That's right? Yeah, no.
I know what it's like, being a businessman.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
I mean, honestly, there were like four people, I'd say seem
like they put down a really big beard that just because they
pressed more numbers in anything to anyone else the the arisaka
representative, but they were more interested in the reindeer.
The biotechnical people because, you know, animals there was the
guy from Fury Robotics and the Ami I was there as well.
I mean, I did on it and then, you know, there was some guy
from Microtech, but I mean, may have you seen my critic
representative? Like it's coming off with a
twig? So, all right.
Well, alright, thanks tuna. I appreciate it.
You're going to make my girlfriend's kids day if I could
get this animal. So, all right, well, good luck.
Weird phone call. Norman you call me about light
vehicles and things. Yeah.
But, you know, I just wanted to see how you were doing for
Christmas. Let's hang up, just just text me
about you. Gotta go, you gotta go, the guy
talks. She just loves talking, huh?
All right, so to says that see, there are some Akka,
biotechnical Theory or Mikey Tech or Microtech.
But listen, I just want to say I'm sorry about your duck case.
You know, I know the duck means a lot to you.
So you don't need to be sorry, just be ready to get even
precise and idea. What do you think?
Listen? What if we go and we pretend
like you're the so low that the corporation hired to come pick
up the duck. And it was like a snafu kind of
thing. You're like, here, I'm here to
pick up the duck and they say, I don't know what you're talking
about and then you go, oh my God, we're going to get fired.
You can we make a big thing about it and maybe they give us
some information about the client and who actually got
them. Actually got that, give us a
lead. It's a shot in the dark but, you
know, we gotta go inside. Hmm. - yes.
What you have a solo, I'm sorry. What?
Are your skills can terminus? He pulls out his little cyber
deck that has like anime characters all around it and he
says, this little thing causes a lot of trouble.
I wonder because I've been able to hack into the system more
than once here at the collectors.
Could I possibly access it through a?
Not Hardline if you want to get into the net architecture.
That has some kind of Nation. We got to be within about 6
meters from the node. You can get me within 6 meters
and then he takes out some virtuality goggles and he says,
I just need a few seconds in there.
Maybe we could find something. I think the bathroom is close
enough to the one that I hacked. All right, well, we just got to
make sure that the bathroom is empty and it doesn't look weird.
That three people just walked into it.
No, here's what we'll do. Let's go.
And pretend to auction, you go to the bathroom, I give you the
password and then that way you can hack in.
While sit sitting there pretty on the toilet password, my get
me through. I'll have to face a black ice
maybe. Yeah.
We don't know what's going to be in there but hey, that's part of
the thrill, isn't it? Yeah.
Also be careful because the computer also technically
corrupted by some other version of kitten.
Catch. Wow, that's fun.
Hmm. Other other thing that I should
mention if there is a net runner in the net or Architecture,
they'll know. I'm there immediately.
Or if there's a demon, the demon will also know.
I'm there immediately. And then they'll set off the
alarms. And then, we're pretty fucked.
But, you know, hey, we've been through worse, right?
Princess a, yeah, but there is very likely that they may have
somebody. This is a, you know, well-known
Mansion well-known fixer. They may have net Runners
already, it might be risky. That's your department.
All right. You do though, you do your super
spy thing. You come in, you look around you
check the corners. I don't know what you do.
It's boring. All right.
Well how about we just do some reconnaissance to start in the
auction area? Figure out who's there?
Figure out? What's the vibe of everything
and if you want to go Go on the net, at some point during the
night, maybe toward the afterward, there for a little
bit, we don't want to set off alarms as soon as we get there.
All right. Yeah, you're the one with the
guns. Yeah.
As a matter of fact she you would see in the backseat.
Well, first of all, she was admiring that really cool turret
that you have on the back. Oh yeah.
But she, you see, I guess I didn't, we didn't really
describe our characters, how their appearance.
But Chris, she she has like this long cloak that she wears.
It's like a long. Black cloak and there's like a
big collar around it, so you can't like the kind of covers a
little bit of her face, but you don't when you first look at her
see, all of her weapons, but it's the kind of under her big
trench coat. And so she went, she was
sitting, she took them all out and put them on the seat next to
her. So you see, as we're, you know,
getting ready to get out, she takes this big assault rifle.
It's like a like custom-designed one.
That's like black and silver. Like with this really cool
Chrome on it. She puts that Back in her
jacket, and she drops the heavy pistol and she puts that in her
jacket. So she's got like all four
weapons. All right.
Yeah, as far as Terminus goes, he's Urban Chic, he has a big
bomber jacket. That's his armor Jack and no
helmet. He doesn't roll with helmets.
Helmets are for Chumps. They're ugly and he has big
poufy. It has a big poofy mohawk with
like something. During his eyes, like eyeshadow,
basically, going across both of his eyes, like One Mono
eyeshadow thing going on and that's his style.
And he has his little very heavy pistol that he calls Boomer in
his pocket. Retro just getting ready, put on
a digital face, create some digital classes that can slip
from time to time, so it can kind of push them up.
Even under was really do anything.
And also at the bottom of the screen, create a little black
pack, very nice. so, you guys woke up to the door, Yeah.
Yes. Press will like kind of lead the
way and walk up to these bouncers.
Hello, we are here for the auction tonight.
If you should yes, I do yes. Or what?
Make sure you register with the receptionist and takes his right
arm and opens the door elegantly.
And it creaks with this feeling of money, it is a big heavy
door, this door opens. You start to hear classical
music? Echoing through this beautiful
room. This has been a restored old
mansion. It's been in the city for
hundreds of years at this point. And it is gorgeous inside, huge,
big columns. And as you look up, there's this
balcony. But the second floor is and be
on the balcony as a second set of stairs that leads to what
looks like a private room. And in front of you and the very
front of the room, the desk, the receptionist twiddling a pen.
Hello? We are here to register for the
auction. Hello there, nice to meet you.
Welcome to the clock to mention, give an invitation.
Unfortunately, we are do not whe Open registrants are here to
register. They thought tapping away at
their keyboard. All right.
And well now we've got space today, okay?
To let people come, you know, so if you could just put your names
down there for security, what do they do with this information?
When we put our names down after every option is completed, we
burn it. Your privacy is important to us
here at the collector. Mention, of course, the sea.
Come on. Write your name down.
Stacy. Do we believe?
Yes? Do I well for me?
Yeah, do I believe her or totally this person human
perception? I wrote the Ten.
Do you believe her? I'll roll as well.
And like try to nudge. You met her mother.
Yeah. You also believe her.
Okay. Remy will go ahead and neither
are you surprised by this because the collector is
notorious for doing pseudo legal shit but under the protection of
so many corporations because he sells shit to them all the time
so they just kind of let him do his thing.
So yeah, I mean I'll still continue to say you know Stacy
Yes, they say they burn in. I'm sure they do.
So let's just go along with it. It's not a big deal.
Yes, let's do that. Gregory sign is named Kenneth
Garrick, Kenneth Stacy and Ric Flair, Rick, Stacy, and Kenneth
Yes, out of the desk, the receptionist pulls out sticky
notes with, hello. My name is and hands it to all
of you Stacy. So this is Rick Stacy and what
was yours? Kenneth, Kenneth Kenneth up with
a K KK with kind of cool. Great, what are you go?
And, and of course, it is a silent auction.
So make sure when you're registering your beds on things
you use the name is applied earlier.
Okay, thank you. Yes.
And as we walk, Away, I say sorry.
Press it's just you know, if they catch a Netrunner then they
might look through the books and decide not to burn the book
today. Yes.
No. You, you are right, it's good
that we don't Give them are actually lives, Soo bad if I
really wanted to buy something now, I can't so downstairs.
You see a few animated animals are made completely of cybertek.
The really cool looking, and they're just sort of pets.
And then you can sort of see a few more animals upstairs.
Any animal of Interest. There's another robotic
reindeer. It doesn't seem to be turned on
and there is a monkey. Oh, monkey Okay.
So retro your idea. Where's that bathroom at?
Is it in that direction? I just pointed a random
Direction. You accept the top of the
stairs, first door, to the left, top of the stairs, first door,
to the left. What's?
Yeah. So can I do a perception check
to see what's going on around that area?
Yep. Okay, 17.
If you look around the room, you notice a few things.
One that there's a round. Circular pretty large circular?
Something in Old in the ceiling. It's a whole two stories up
because what you're in right now is a to High room, it's kind of
hard to see what it is. But you do notice in the corners
of the room at their back, left and back.
Right corner are security cameras doing scans.
Okay okay and at the top of the stairs there's like an extra box
room and after sort of scanning around the room with the
perception or old you just rolled you realize that that's
An Elevator Shaft, okay? I would like to see just who is
in attendance. At this auction, if I see
anybody of note, anybody that looks like corporations that I
would recognize. Yeah. 19:19.
Yeah, there is a representative from arisaka.
There is a representative from bio Technica.
There was a representative from Microtech which as you overheard
on the phone call earlier is just as dweeby as you thought it
was going to be my contact but the fourth person that was
listed by tuna is not here. Mmm.
Okay. Hmm.
The fury robotics one, right. Okay, can I go and talk to the
bio Technica? One.
Yes. Okay I'll just go up to.
Hi. My name is Kenneth.
Nice to meet you. I don't want anything.
I don't don't offer me anything. You can leave me alone.
Tell me. I just wanted to say hello and
you know, no no. Excuse me, this costume TV
thing, not not a Vibe. If you could just Leave me
alone. It's not a costume.
It's part of the. It's funny how you're talking
and how you think I care? That's so interesting.
That you think that I want to know any reason about what's
going on today. I want to look snow animals and
I want to fucking leave. Do you understand why?
I'm here. Okay, fine, I'll just tell my
cousin Ione. Apropos SKU that you said fuck
you to me. Okay.
How can I roll persuasion? Maybe that's something like
yeah, row persuasion. 11:00 you threatened me with middle
management? Do you know who I fucking am?
Just joking. Like me alone.
Who the fuck are you? He walks away.
You're all done. 11. Yeah.
Terminus walks my him, Terminus. Why collected walks over to the
biotechnical rep? And the rep sort of has said
something to him. It's like collector.
Looks over his head. Never mind.
I'm so sorry. There's a have some drinks on
the house and the collector walks over to you Kenneth.
Yes. Kenneth, that's my name that
show you dumb motherfucker. I Know Who You Are.
I was using my actual name. Not my code name, that trial
darest my darling. No.
You you are a silly motherfucker around you.
I know your names because that's my job.
I need to know people come in here.
What the fuck do you want? Okay, you know what fine no I
feel good. You took my duck Georgia.
My duck. No no.
No, no, no retro the dark yesterday.
The prize of the first night of the auction.
I bought off a dead drop. So now I paid money for the
dark. Yeah.
Someone stole that from me and then sold it to you.
So you have now done stolen goods which I had always your
Pete has as you're saying this. There's a way to that comes by
with a drink and he grabs it as he's listening to you, huh?
So I wanted a chance to get my duck back and that's certainly
will be difficult for him to Grant it.
It's not here anymore. Is that?
That's correct. Now, I know by your rules that
you can't tell me who sold it to you.
But you don't have any rules, as you can tell me who you didn't
sell it to suppose. That's true.
He's the thing that true do I want to?
I'm sorry too. I'm sorry to butt in here.
Hi, my name is, thank you. I worked on it all day.
Welcome, my name is Rick. This is Stacey.
Hello Rick Stacy is it? Yes, it is.
Stacey, welcome to my Mansion. Thank you.
Thank you so much for watching. Very, lovely, very lovely.
I love it. Listen, I can't help.
But overhear my friends. Duck problems malady, Mallard e,
as we might call. It is funny, isn't it?
Yes, listen, maybe there's something we can do to alleviate
you of some kind of In return for some kind of information for
you see, my friend and I here we are a little new to this scene
that you have going on here. But we're not new to the
corporate scene. Yes.
Stacy why don't you inform our friend here?
Our lovely host about the things that we can do to help them.
We are, we can offer many services.
Has for you or for your clients. If that is also an option, we do
many jobs for hire any new items that may be on your list to
auction off. We are very very good at
acquiring things when need be, you know, a customer doesn't
pay, let's say they said they would pay, then they didn't pay
and you have to track them down for that.
Yes, you need a little bit of muscle, maybe you need a little
bit of black. Male, I have something.
So last night, the dark was a surprise.
Unfortunately word about the monkey has.
Got out. It's Monkey Business tonight.
He's overly laughs over the last thought that's so funny.
Oh my goodness, I will probably need some protection for the
monkey in its Transit. Going on to its following
destination, it's going to be We don't know who's bought it yet,
but with the amount of press that that's got some air leaks
with those, naughty media, who come in with fake names, can you
believe that it's going to come into my lovely home?
I invite these people in. How you doing, bro?
Travis names travesty yes and the eight, but I suppose I would
need someone perhaps who is okay with a little violence to
protect the cargo and I cargo I mean at Monkey over there the
monkey the monkeys like jumping around and it looks pretty
happy. It's just like swinging off a
pole at stuff. Yes, that's great.
Hey Stacy, what do you? Yes, that seems like the
perfect. The perfect job.
I've done many protections of many VIPs and this monkey is
certainly a VIP. So, so, what do you want?
Well, like I said, you can't tell us who you sold it to, but
you can say who you didn't sell it to roll.
Persuasion, 14. How many can I add some luck?
And some luck. Yes, you told me.
How much like do I have? I would sport points of luck.
Nice, that's enough that's all retro.
If I weren't partial to when you're dead what you gonna do
with your head? Anyway, that's for another time.
Um, so I can't tell you who I sold it to but perhaps maybe and
if you were to help me with the monkey delivery in a probably
tomorrow, Morning. I'll get the receptionist to
send you the information. Let's say I left the computer
unlocked in my office, with some of the invoices that aren't
going to be burned until we finish the Animal Auctions
because there's a third night tomorrow.
So let's say I did that, and you protected the monkey and that's
your payment. That's what you get.
I think that seems pretty reasonable, right?
Well, I'm going to go to the penthouse.
I'm going to go in there. Then I'm going to go to the
bathroom for approximately 11 minutes.
Don't ask me how, I know how long I'll be that's personal and
so you have that amount of time, okay?
Perfectly good, a drink from one of the waitstaff same time,
don't collect Winks at you and walks upstairs to the penthouse.
And about a minute later, walks down the stairs and walks into
the bathroom, What A pompous ass Douche.
All right, I'm going to go into his office.
I'll do a quick search on the computer, will get all the
information. We need, will get the hell out
of here. All right, roll the roll
security tech for me. Okay.
Just to make sure you don't trigger anything back.
Okay, so this is a minute, add two points of luck to this.
All right, so I got a 20. Oh wow, nice, very good.
Yes, you managed to skirt around some security, most of it was
turned off like the That. But you do also find a little
account for payroll and petty cash, and you find 300, Eddie's
with that 20. You just rolled which is a nice
little kitty to find, okay? The owner, I don't want to rob
the collector, you find it. It's petty cash.
You do what you want with that. Oh believe me robbing the
collector is like the Sesame. You have to do in this.
Okay well Terminus thinks about it and I'll go odds and evens
roll 1B. T-to odds, I take it even if I
don't do it. It's I can't help myself.
You get 300 Eddie's even though I'm making five thousand it over
the steel plate in the collector.
And you also find an invoice. I take a picture of it with my
agent, or I download this image straight to my agent from the
laptop. That's free.
Bada-bing bada-boom. Is there any other pertinent
information that I'm finding on this computer?
This is the only Nation about the duck sale that you can find,
okay? So I immediately just close up
the computer and I even lock it for him.
That's nice of you. I know exactly when I walk out I
go straight to the one for doing that.
You get inspiration. That's cute.
I like that. That's what I'm gonna do.
All right even though I still 300 is lock up behind ya.
Come on, you know? So So, I head out, I head out to
the three of them and I show them.
My age, are I just text them, the, the image that the two of
them. Yeah, so it was Fury robotics,
of course, the people who aren't here tonight, but he was thing
says where it's stored at. Right now, The Collector,
mention night, City Fury, robotics night City, okay?
So this was written to Fury, robotics 23,000 Eddie's first,
non cybernetic duck. Wow, 1,500 for the auction fees.
2500 for the man. However, it's not going to pay
us for the monkey. He's charging 2500 for the
animal handling. We should I this is a rookie
mistake. I should have asked for a for a
fee. Plus, he's always do this.
I mean, you know, I care about the money but it's what you
should have understood but if you understood the rules within
the take some bribes mean, look, that's 3,000!
That he's right off the bat. What does that say down there
press on the bottom? 27.
Thousand Earth at deliver the live.
Look at the money. This is my cyber eyes just not
working right now. Your item will be start
Warehouse, 25 until delivery location is supplied.
Daily storage is charred at 75, 750 Eddie's.
So Warehouse, 25 is where it's stored.
Can I do a local expert? See if I know where that is.
Yep. All right.
A 10. Hmm.
It was a DVD. Fate.
Okay. Cool.
There's a deviate because Warehouse 25 is actually run by
Night, City, courier company called you P&S all ultimate
packing and shipping mmm-hmm. Okay, well, where has 25 is
right here in town and it's likely part of how the collector
delivers things and we don't have to deliver the monkey till
tomorrow, right? Yeah.
So we've go get my duck back and
Come back and do the deal for the monkey.
Oh yeah, he knows who you are. He doesn't know who.
Yeah, I guess we got to do the monkey thing to tomorrow.
And where are we supposed? Where are we supposed to be?
Delivering? This monkey?
Did he give us a damn it? They haven't sold it yet.
So okay, so we have to wait going to be.
The secretary is going to send us all that information.
Yes and now we got to get this man.
His duck or talking man. How terrible would it be?
A Fury. Ended up buying the monkey too I
wonder what they want to do with it.
Well, they're not here. You're not here.
That's right. So they must be very happy with
that. Duck that they're going to
unfortunately and I think time is of the essence because
they're charging. 750 Eddie's a day.
Yes, to store that thing. You know.
They're going to want to take that duck, straight home.
Yeah. Let's let's let's go get my
duck. Let's go get Mama Mallard.
Let's go get your damn duck and the three of you leave the
collective Mansion get into the van.
And head to the you P&S Warehouse, 25.
Next time, I'm no latency side quest.
Hey man, you were cool. As soon as I saw that TV on your
shoulders, I'm sorry. What did I just say?
I didn't realize I just said something fine.
If it will bring some joy to both of your faces, I will do
that. We're never gonna get this duck.
I almost want to tip over that fucking Port-A-Potty cause some
chaos. We pick up the duck.
We get the hell out of here. So I need everybody here right
now to tell me your names and who you're in, who's in charge
Come here coming right now. I text back Terminus there is no
duck here. Alright my Lockpick Set is
broken. So okay, so what did you get
Terminus? You got an address.
We're so close to getting your duck.
Just we have some questions. We need some help.
Nobody here. Needs to get hurt.
No, funny business. So your friend gets it.
Whatever's my duck. Yes, it belonged to somebody
else. Technically isn't your duck
look. It's all right.
I'm a Rebel Without a Cause Hi, just your friendly
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And here's a word from your sponsor, save the date.
In Tales of Legend, there are stories of Heroes who stand for
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Yeah, my friends. Let me get stabbed while I'm
sleeping help me and then there's these assholes gods
don't exist. Yeah, this kiss me, it was meant
to be okay, at dinner table. We don't talk about religion,
okay? That is never.
I stopped you before. Yeah, every Thursday.
I'm sorry. You're gonna let it Crackle.
Have a flaming sword in one hand and a singing sword in the
other. Have you thought this listen?
I asked as a courtesy. I don't need any of y'all
Stephen permission. Listen as a group of absolute.
Maniacs, try and save the world. There are two minutes ago.
Yes, there are. We release.
We release a 900 mimics into the book.
Unleash an invasive species into this for the short.
Yeah. Oh man these are the adventures
of save the d8. We've done over 100 hours of
this podcast and we still managed to the have Dumber
conversations every week. Unleash an invasive species into
this for the short. Yeah.
Oh man these are the adventures of save the d8.
We've done over 100 hours of this podcast and we still
managed to the have Dumber conversations every week.