1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:03,800 You're listening to the Bridgetown Church Podcast with 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:06,840 Pastor Casey Kendall, where our vision is Jesus, our mission is 3 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:09,760 people, and our cause is love. Thanks for tuning in. 4 00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:14,680 Let's dive in. So First Samuel chapter 18, if 5 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:18,240 you have your Bible handy, we've been in a series entitled Heart 6 00:00:18,600 --> 00:00:23,880 and this is for us, where man, the Bible says that man looks at 7 00:00:23,880 --> 00:00:29,320 the outward appearance, but God looks at your heart. 8 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:33,640 And so Father's happy Father's Day to you. 9 00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:37,520 If there's a dad sitting around you, you just welcome him. 10 00:00:37,520 --> 00:00:41,080 Let's tell him happy Father's Day, Happy Father's Day. 11 00:00:41,080 --> 00:00:47,320 Sergio, sell someone, happy Father's Day all around you. 12 00:00:47,320 --> 00:00:50,240 Amen. First Samuel chapter 18 we've 13 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:56,120 entitled this message how to be a difficult dad how to be a 14 00:00:56,120 --> 00:00:58,360 difficult dad. I, I don't think that takes a 15 00:00:58,360 --> 00:01:03,400 lot of hard work, but being a good dad does take a lot of 16 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:08,040 focus, intentionality. And, but we wanted to send out, 17 00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:11,160 I pray today my, my vision for today is that it would both be 18 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:16,040 encouraging and challenging, that it would encourage you as a 19 00:01:16,040 --> 00:01:19,960 dad, but it will also challenge us as dads. 20 00:01:19,960 --> 00:01:24,600 This is the long road of failing for me. 21 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:29,040 This has been the long lessons that I've needed to learn. 22 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:33,360 And now at 50 years old, I feel like I'm really starting to grow 23 00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:38,000 that crazy. I really do believe I was 24 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:39,960 growing. But man, in the last five years 25 00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:43,320 of my life, I've just seen God do some amazing things in my 26 00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:45,040 heart. And I just want to talk to you 27 00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:50,040 out of my own failures and link that to the life of Saul in 28 00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:53,920 first Samuel chapter 18. And so if you have your Bible 29 00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:58,480 handy, if you can turn to first Samuel again, chapter 18. 30 00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:01,200 But I'm just going to look at verse 29, and then we're going 31 00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:05,040 to rewind and go back all the way back to verse 17 and go 32 00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:08,000 through the whole chapter together from there. 33 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:13,200 But First Samuel chapter 18, beginning in verse 29, the Bible 34 00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:18,720 says, and Saul was still more afraid of David, and so Saul 35 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:22,200 became David's enemy continually. 36 00:02:22,840 --> 00:02:27,840 I want to read that again. Stamped over Saul's life was 37 00:02:27,840 --> 00:02:35,280 this verse in 29. And Saul was still more afraid 38 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:40,560 of David. And so Saul became David's enemy 39 00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:44,200 continually. Lord, we pray and ask that today 40 00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:46,120 would be, that it would be uplifting. 41 00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:49,840 It would be us stretching forward to be more like Jesus. 42 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:53,360 That today would be for us a day where we get to celebrate 43 00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:57,280 fathers. And Lord also, by your power and 44 00:02:57,280 --> 00:03:01,760 your spirit, break chains in our lives that have held us back. 45 00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:07,800 We do ask and pray that we would take up our responsibility, the 46 00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:13,800 right that you've given to us, to lead and to serve and to grow 47 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:18,760 and to shepherd and to moving away in our lives to bring you 48 00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:21,800 honor and glory. So Lord, we pray that you would 49 00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:26,680 draw men and women to yourself and that through this time there 50 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:28,960 would be both the encouragement of your spirit and the 51 00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:32,800 conviction of your Holy Spirit and the transformation of your 52 00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:35,280 Spirit as we're brought back to the cross. 53 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:40,120 And so, Lord, we ask and pray that you would be glorified in 54 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:46,560 this place in Jesus name, Amen. If you have someone sitting next 55 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,960 to you as we always do, it's a tradition here. 56 00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:53,720 If you would just look at them and say neighbor, my neighbor, I 57 00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:55,840 see you. Yep. 58 00:03:55,840 --> 00:04:01,600 Just tell them again, I see you, I see you. 59 00:04:01,600 --> 00:04:05,880 Truth be told, there is a crime that is continually being 60 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:12,720 committed in our country. Every year it has diverted, it 61 00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:18,600 has deceived and defrauded this important distinction of being 62 00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:23,080 called one of the greatest names in my life, and that is that. 63 00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:26,640 I don't know if you've ever found yourself there, but it's 64 00:04:26,640 --> 00:04:30,560 on this Father's Day. I believe it gets cheated 65 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:40,800 compared to Mother's Day. Not half as money is spent on 66 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:46,440 Father's Day compared to Mother's Day. 67 00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:57,880 In fact, Hallmark states that more money is spent on cards on 68 00:04:57,880 --> 00:05:02,440 Saint Patrick's Day rather than on Father's Day. 69 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:10,040 I believe there is a crime that is being committed in our midst. 70 00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:12,880 Even if you walk into the store today. 71 00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:18,960 Father's Father's Day is always teamed up with graduate 72 00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:23,920 recognition. We don't even get our own aisle 73 00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:30,120 in the supermarket. I think that Father's Day has 74 00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:34,720 actually been cheated. You can actually go get 75 00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:39,320 breakfast or brunch or lunch right after church and you can 76 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:42,040 actually get into the restaurant. 77 00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:48,040 Some of you, you weren't even going to a restaurant. 78 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:53,000 You're actually going to the BBQ that you bought with the food 79 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:59,040 that you bought, washing the dishes that you paid for with 80 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:03,880 the water that you worked so hard to bring to your family as 81 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:09,280 they sit and watch you labor over the smoker. 82 00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:16,560 I think often times in our lives the significance of the role as 83 00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:21,560 dad in fatherhood has lost its worth. 84 00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:25,160 Can I tell you dads today we see you? 85 00:06:27,280 --> 00:06:30,720 Can I tell you dads today that we are thankful for you? 86 00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:35,920 Can I tell you dads today that we honor you today? 87 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:40,320 Can I tell you that we actually support you? 88 00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:47,360 Because your example today has become our experience for 89 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:51,560 tomorrow. The hard days and the long 90 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:56,360 nights that you have labored. We see you for the way that you 91 00:06:56,360 --> 00:07:00,280 got up early and the way that you stayed somewhere late so 92 00:07:00,280 --> 00:07:02,600 your kids could do something good. 93 00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:07,120 We honor you for that. In which you have gotten up 94 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:12,160 every morning to drive hours just to lay your life down on 95 00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:16,600 the line so we can live out our lives for Jesus. 96 00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:23,080 We just want to say today that we are thankful for you, Dad, 97 00:07:23,280 --> 00:07:28,520 that you come into this room and I do not want you to minimize 98 00:07:28,520 --> 00:07:32,920 the power of your presence and the prominence of your position. 99 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:39,200 We actually see you and we're actually thankful for you. 100 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:43,400 Not with a golf clap, but with a resounding yes. 101 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:55,360 That dad, you mean more than you will ever know in this life. 102 00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:58,960 And it doesn't matter if you're all your father was 103 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:03,600 irresponsible or ignorant or inconsistent or not involved. 104 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:07,480 You know today that you're going to be intentional, purposeful, 105 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:12,400 and powerful in all that Christ has called you to do, filled 106 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:16,120 with this Spirit and fulfilling the mission that God has set 107 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:19,120 you. I was talking to a younger man 108 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:23,880 in his 30s who had found himself with me over lunch, and he told 109 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:27,280 me these words. He said finally, my dad and my 110 00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:31,840 grandfather are trying to get involved back in my life, but he 111 00:08:31,840 --> 00:08:37,360 said it's too late. It's too late. 112 00:08:38,400 --> 00:08:43,159 I already have my own kids. I'm already leading my own life, 113 00:08:43,280 --> 00:08:45,720 he said. It's too late with a wounded 114 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:48,840 heart and broken trust. And this is what I want to 115 00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:52,840 encourage you to do today, men, do what you can, where you can, 116 00:08:52,840 --> 00:08:54,520 how you can, and with who you can. 117 00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:58,240 I want to encourage you. John Tyson wrote a book called 118 00:08:58,240 --> 00:09:01,080 The Intentional Father. He said these words. 119 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:05,800 Let's not be a generation of fathers who push the crisis off 120 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:09,520 to the next generation. Let's be fathers who release 121 00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:16,240 blessing and not brokenness, favor and not curses. 122 00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:22,120 Resolve in your spirit to do this with intentionality and 123 00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:25,760 with focus. If there ever was a man in 124 00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:29,120 Scripture that lost focus, it was the man that we will be 125 00:09:29,120 --> 00:09:35,480 looking at today, King Saul. King Saul's life was lived in 126 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:39,760 convenience of his flesh rather than obedience to the Lord. 127 00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:46,560 He actually forsook the word that God had given to him, and 128 00:09:46,560 --> 00:09:50,160 in forsaking the word that God had given to him. 129 00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:55,880 This was stamped over Saul's life for Samuel chapter 15 verse 130 00:09:55,880 --> 00:10:00,080 22, when God told him to wipe out all the Amalekites. 131 00:10:00,080 --> 00:10:03,640 This is what Saul's life was stamped with. 132 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:09,360 Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, 133 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:11,560 as in obeying the voice of the Lord? 134 00:10:12,160 --> 00:10:17,680 Behold, Samuel said, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to 135 00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:23,840 heed than the fat of Rams. Saul became not just miserable 136 00:10:24,120 --> 00:10:30,280 in His Majesty, but he became a very difficult dad to be around. 137 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:37,240 He became angry, he became abusive, he became absent and 138 00:10:37,240 --> 00:10:42,600 antagonistic to the will of God. And I wonder today, as we've 139 00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:47,040 come into this place, how many of you dads still use an alarm 140 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:51,480 clock, You still use your phone to wake you up in the morning. 141 00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:56,240 Some of you've been getting up so early for so long that you 142 00:10:56,240 --> 00:11:00,880 automatically get up at 5:00 AM. You know the first chirping of 143 00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:03,360 the birds that that is your time to get up. 144 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:08,080 For others of us, we're still using our phone and that sound 145 00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:13,480 in the morning rattles you from slumber and brings you out of 146 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:16,760 something that is comfortable into something that is 147 00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:20,680 uncomfortable and that is waking up at that moment. 148 00:11:21,160 --> 00:11:24,800 For some of you, you didn't even work out the night before, but 149 00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:27,120 your body hurts just like you did. 150 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:33,200 For some of you, it is still hard for you to get out of bed. 151 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:37,560 I'm praying that this message is like an alarm clock. 152 00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:42,360 Not a lullaby to push you to sleep this morning, but an alarm 153 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:47,200 clock to arouse our sleepy souls to be the men that Christ has 154 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:50,280 called us to be. And I want to give you some 155 00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:56,200 warnings about Saul's life that we can not live out and be the 156 00:11:56,440 --> 00:12:01,360 difficult dad that is in the house. 157 00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:07,480 You see, we're called to build our homes, men not allowing our 158 00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:11,880 family to walk around our presence like they're walking on 159 00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:15,960 egg shells. And it's important that we 160 00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:20,040 realize this because this is God's call over our life. 161 00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:23,800 So how did Saul live? I want to give you some things 162 00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:27,920 that we could do as dads to become very difficult. 163 00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:29,920 How many of you want to be a difficult dad? 164 00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:36,600 None of us. But how many of our testimonies 165 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:40,560 would become that? We have become that without even 166 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:45,680 seeing it ourselves. Can I give you something that 167 00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:52,040 from the chapter here in Saul's life, if you take note, Saul 168 00:12:52,040 --> 00:12:55,640 became #1 vacillating out of insecurity. 169 00:12:56,480 --> 00:13:00,760 Vacillating out of insecurity. If we were to hit pause, rewind, 170 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:04,240 and go back in the tape of the life of David, we know that 171 00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:07,800 David is just beat Goliath. We know that David walked into 172 00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:11,040 the valley of Elah in the same valley where Saul should have 173 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:14,760 been fighting the giant. In walks a shepherd boy, not 174 00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:18,880 even 20 years old, and he takes care of the giant in the name of 175 00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:22,360 God and for the glory of God. He wasn't going for Goliath's 176 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:23,880 head. He was going for the glory of 177 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:27,760 God and thus he defeats Goliath with all the Philistines are 178 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:30,960 routed and pushed back towards their own land. 179 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:35,280 And now we find ourselves that now David comes to the palace 180 00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:41,720 with Goliaths head in his hand, and Saul becomes very jealous of 181 00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:47,160 Davids victories. And in this moment now he had 182 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:53,160 promised already that whoever defeats Goliath would get riches 183 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:58,640 from the king, and they would also get to marry Saul's 184 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,440 daughter. Now let's pick it up in verse 185 00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:05,480 17. Then Saul said to David, These 186 00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:10,240 were the words of Saul to David. Here is my older daughter Merab, 187 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:15,880 which means increase abundance. I will give her to you as a 188 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:19,160 wife. Only be valiant for me and fight 189 00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:23,800 the Lord's battles. But notice this for Saul 190 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,760 thought, let my hand not be against him, but let the hand to 191 00:14:26,760 --> 00:14:30,040 the Philistines be against them. And then the Bible says, so 192 00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:34,760 David said to Saul, who am I and what is my life or my father's 193 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:38,400 family in Israel, that I should be son-in-law to the king? 194 00:14:38,640 --> 00:14:42,440 But it happened at the time when Mehrab, Saul's daughter, should 195 00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:46,840 have been given to David, that she was given to a drill, the 196 00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:51,600 Mahala fight as a wife. And now Michael, Saul's 197 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:57,600 daughter, loved David, and they told Saul, and the thing pleased 198 00:14:57,760 --> 00:15:02,200 him. So Saul said, I'll give her to 199 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:07,640 him, that she may be a snare to him, and that the hand of the 200 00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:14,200 Philistines may be against him. Therefore Saul said to David a 201 00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:18,960 second time, You shall be my son-in-law. 202 00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:25,160 Today notice the vacillating aspect of Saul's life. 203 00:15:25,440 --> 00:15:31,160 He promises to David one daughter, which is the eldest 204 00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:34,760 daughter. He ends up giving Mareb to 205 00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:40,560 another man. And then he gives Michael who is 206 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:45,320 names mean, who is like God to David. 207 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:49,280 And he says, well you're not my son-in-law now, but now you will 208 00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:53,240 be my son-in-law. Now notice what happens. 209 00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:59,040 Saul is not looking for a specific wedding date. 210 00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:01,720 He's looking for David's death date. 211 00:16:02,440 --> 00:16:05,640 The reason why we know that is the text is clear. 212 00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:09,480 Saul thought, let not my hand be against him, but let the hand of 213 00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:13,360 the Philistines be against him. Notice Saul wasn't seeking a 214 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:19,200 celebration, he was actually seeking a funeral. 215 00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:22,680 You might say, where's that at? Verse 21? 216 00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:28,560 I will give her to him, that she may be a snare to him and that 217 00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:33,280 the hand of the Philistines may be against him. 218 00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:39,760 No, no, notice if you would. Saul's vacillating from his own 219 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:43,360 insecurity. The word vacillating, if you're 220 00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:50,120 taking note, means that Saul is torn between two opinions. 221 00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:53,280 At one time he says you're going to be my son-in-law. 222 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,000 At another time he says that you will not. 223 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,600 But no, wait, wait now, verse 21. 224 00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:01,520 You'll be my son-in-law. Today. 225 00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:06,040 Saul has become, if you take note, indecisive because of his 226 00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:09,520 own insecurity. Saul has become inconsistent 227 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:14,400 because of his own insecurity. And notice this, he now leads to 228 00:17:14,440 --> 00:17:19,480 instability because of his own insecurity. 229 00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:25,880 The vacillator will always be torn between 2 views and doesn't 230 00:17:25,880 --> 00:17:31,400 keep their word and then he blames it on everybody else 231 00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:35,520 around him. I was struck with this question 232 00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:38,400 as I was studying. Someone wrote. 233 00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:43,640 Did anyone else's dad make his bad mood everybody else's 234 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:48,440 problem? Can I read that question again? 235 00:17:51,120 --> 00:17:57,280 Did anyone else's dad make his bad mood everybody else's 236 00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:59,480 problem? And this is what someone 237 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:01,560 answered? Of course he did. 238 00:18:02,120 --> 00:18:08,520 It was always about him, his feelings, his wants, his needs. 239 00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:14,280 And you were punished if you didn't make him happy. 240 00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:21,680 I feel the person wrote like we were all raised to be his cheer 241 00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:25,680 section rather than his children. 242 00:18:30,800 --> 00:18:37,120 That is a perfect time for you to answer the call to own your 243 00:18:37,120 --> 00:18:44,400 own responsibility. Your attitude is your own 244 00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:48,280 responsibility. Your own fear is your own 245 00:18:48,280 --> 00:18:51,920 responsibility. Your own anger is your own 246 00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:55,680 responsibility. Your own frustration is your own 247 00:18:55,680 --> 00:19:00,120 responsibility. It is not dependent upon what 248 00:19:00,120 --> 00:19:03,280 type of house you walk into or leave from. 249 00:19:03,800 --> 00:19:09,560 What we have to understand as dads is that we come to a place 250 00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:16,840 where we will own what God has called us to own and understand 251 00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:22,560 that we cannot fulfill our role as a father in the name of Jesus 252 00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:27,400 unless we own our own responsibilities by the power of 253 00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:32,520 Jesus. DC Saul's response to David was 254 00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:38,840 not because he beat Goliath. Saul's response to David was 255 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:44,600 because Saul disobeyed God. It was because Saul's way was 256 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:49,560 better than God's way, and thus he loses every way to make a 257 00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:54,120 difference in the Kingdom, and he loses the opportunity to make 258 00:19:54,120 --> 00:19:59,240 a difference in his family. The seesaw, if we were to take 259 00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:07,560 note, cared more about his career then he did his calling 260 00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:13,880 to his own family. He cared more about his own 261 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:20,800 career than he did in obeying the command of God to follow 262 00:20:20,840 --> 00:20:25,960 after what the Lord had told him already through the prophet 263 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:28,520 Samuel. And then if there's anything 264 00:20:28,520 --> 00:20:33,360 that we often get wrong, we live within an insecure place. 265 00:20:33,360 --> 00:20:39,720 Thus, we make very poor decisions in our lives that now 266 00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:43,000 impact everybody else else around me. 267 00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:46,680 I remember listening to a message by a pastor in Fort 268 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:48,640 Lauderdale. It was this whole marriage 269 00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:53,000 series, and I gathered together all his, at the time, his C DS. 270 00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:57,960 I actually sat in my Acura Integra in my garage in 271 00:20:57,960 --> 00:21:03,360 Victorville, and I put in the first CD, which was actually the 272 00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:08,200 third CD, and that was my wife's responsibility in our marriage. 273 00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:17,080 I took everything that she was supposed to do rather than 274 00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:23,520 focusing on what God had called me to do in the moment. 275 00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:28,600 And because of that, I didn't own my own responsibility. 276 00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:34,480 And I left horrible cracks in my family, so much so that as a 277 00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:40,600 pastor at a church doing the work of the ministry, my 15 year 278 00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:42,680 old son would tell me these words. 279 00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:46,600 You're winning the world, but you're losing me. 280 00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:51,080 But I'm travelling, I'm speaking, I'm behind the pulpit, 281 00:21:51,080 --> 00:21:54,440 I'm sharing God's word, I'm doing everything that I think is 282 00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:59,440 good. And here I am doing all of that 283 00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:04,960 at the expense of not reaching my first calling, which was my 284 00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:11,840 wife and my children. And in that moment, I, my eyes 285 00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:18,160 were open to see that I have a choice to make, and that was 286 00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:22,640 this. That my worth would not be found 287 00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:28,640 behind this pulpit. That everywhere I spoke next or 288 00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:32,880 everything I did next meant how valuable I actually was. 289 00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,600 No. My friend told me he said these 290 00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:39,400 words, if your church plant doesn't really work out, he says 291 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:42,640 will you be OK selling paint? And I said absolutely not. 292 00:22:43,920 --> 00:22:46,440 He said you need to start being OK with that because that is a 293 00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:49,760 big flaw in your life. He said because all of your 294 00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:55,720 identity is wrapped up in what you do rather than who God has 295 00:22:55,720 --> 00:23:01,920 made you to be. And now I come and share this 296 00:23:01,920 --> 00:23:07,920 painful reality with you so you don't have to walk down this 297 00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:13,600 road filled with insecurity and vacillating and leading your 298 00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:21,520 family down the wrong path because you just didn't show up. 299 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:26,600 I love what Mark Batterson writes in his book. 300 00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:32,240 He said pride is a byproduct of insecurity, and the more 301 00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:36,880 insecure a person is, the more monuments they need to build. 302 00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:43,400 There is a fine line between thy Kingdom come and my Kingdom 303 00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:46,640 come. If you cross the line, your 304 00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:49,920 relationship with God is self-serving. 305 00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:55,200 You are not serving God, you're actually using God. 306 00:23:55,720 --> 00:23:59,880 You aren't building altars to God, you are building monuments 307 00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:04,120 to yourself. Vacillating out of insecurity 308 00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:07,880 always leads people to be consumed with themselves. 309 00:24:08,760 --> 00:24:13,560 They always communicate only about themselves. 310 00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:18,720 They carry themselves as a competer against other people 311 00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:21,360 rather than a completer in the Kingdom of God. 312 00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:26,520 So how does this manifest itself in being a difficult dad, in 313 00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:29,920 vacillating an insecurity? I want to give you some things 314 00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:33,440 that Saul was notice if you would, and maybe I might not be 315 00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:36,440 speaking to any man in here, but maybe it hit someone at the top 316 00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:40,520 of your heart. This is how it manifests itself 317 00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,920 in insecurity and vacillating. You're bothered. 318 00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:48,040 I mean you are bothered all the time. 319 00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:51,040 You go to the store, you're bothered. 320 00:24:52,120 --> 00:24:53,840 You go to the gym, you're bothered. 321 00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,120 You're on the freeway, you're bothered. 322 00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:59,680 You go now into your home, you're bothered. 323 00:24:59,960 --> 00:25:02,800 You're bothered by the wife that you prayed for and the kids that 324 00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:07,520 you asked God to provide for. You've become so bothered that 325 00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:13,720 you are stewing inside everywhere you go because you 326 00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:16,000 don't measure up. No one else will measure up 327 00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:19,280 around you. This is the second way it 328 00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,520 manifests itself. You begin to boil. 329 00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:25,920 Now this is something that is not just bothered, but now 330 00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:29,840 you're boiling on the inside. You're angry at your own 331 00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:33,640 decisions and what you're doing, and you're projecting that 332 00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:35,800 around people that are around you. 333 00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:43,360 Your heat spills over onto people that you say you love and 334 00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:46,800 you're boiling inside. You haven't even communicated 335 00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:49,600 anything yet. But because you're so bothered, 336 00:25:49,600 --> 00:25:54,240 now you're just boiling and it's simmering and your family's 337 00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:56,400 like, Dad, you OK? Damn. 338 00:25:56,400 --> 00:26:00,160 OK, Dad. Dad, you seem a little. 339 00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:02,680 No, no, no, I'm not. Are you? 340 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:06,760 No, no, no. Listen, It goes from bothered to 341 00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:10,720 boiling. Now notice this blaming. 342 00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:18,920 If I didn't have that job, if I didn't have that boss, if I 343 00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:23,840 didn't have that wife, if I didn't have those kids, if I had 344 00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:28,680 a different car. You never own this. 345 00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:34,240 Thus, you miss the opportunities to truly love people around you. 346 00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:37,560 This is what I want to encourage you to do. 347 00:26:38,120 --> 00:26:43,000 ACT according to God's way rather than reacting according 348 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:47,720 to your way. And in that moment, fathers, as 349 00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:52,320 we own our own responsibility. I remember having to sit down 350 00:26:52,320 --> 00:26:57,640 with my kids and ask them without any defense, have I done 351 00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:00,600 anything as your father to offend you? 352 00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:09,840 And I sat there and I listen to things that I didn't even see 353 00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:18,480 about my own life that God needed to heal only if I was 354 00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:20,360 willing to confess and repent of. 355 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:26,480 And so Saul comes to this place where he is living in 356 00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:29,520 vacillating out of his own insecurity. 357 00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:32,320 The second thing, warning, Dad, I want to give you as an alarm, 358 00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:36,360 stop living out of secrecy, out of your own anxiety. 359 00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:39,560 This is Saul's life. Look at verse 22. 360 00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:44,040 And Saul commanded his servants communicate with David secretly. 361 00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,760 OK, let's, let's do this secretly. 362 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:50,440 The the word secretly there means that it's covered and that 363 00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:55,320 it's covert and that it's not out in public and say, look, the 364 00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:58,520 king has delight in you and all his servants love you. 365 00:27:59,120 --> 00:28:02,960 They're buttering David up. We would say now therefore 366 00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:07,600 become the King's son-in-law. So Saul's servant spoke those 367 00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:11,480 words in the hearing of David, and David said this Does it seem 368 00:28:11,480 --> 00:28:14,520 to you a light thing to be a King's son-in-law? 369 00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:19,240 Seen, I'm a poor and lightly esteemed man. 370 00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:23,560 Don't you love David? His approach in verse 23? 371 00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:25,680 Look at his approach in verse 18. 372 00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:29,960 So David said to Saul, who am I and what is my life or my 373 00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:34,320 father's family in Israel, that I should be son-in-law to the 374 00:28:34,320 --> 00:28:38,200 king? Notice Davis''s humility and 375 00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:43,480 notice Saul's anxiety. Look at the difference if you 376 00:28:43,480 --> 00:28:46,520 would. And notice this in verse verse 377 00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:49,280 24. And the servants of Saul told 378 00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:52,040 him, saying in this manner, David spoke. 379 00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:56,360 And then Saul said, Thus you shall say to David, the king 380 00:28:56,360 --> 00:29:02,720 does not desire any dowry, but 100 foreskins of the 381 00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,920 Philistines. Ouch. 382 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:15,080 That's really fighting a battle out of Saul's anxiety, he says. 383 00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:24,120 Let's take it another step further in mutilation out of his 384 00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:32,200 anxiety. Foreskins that I'm not even 385 00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:36,520 We'll, we'll talk about that another time to take vengeance 386 00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:42,360 on the King's enemies. But Saul thought to make David 387 00:29:42,360 --> 00:29:44,640 fall by the hand of the Philistines. 388 00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:49,400 Do you see, out of anxiety, many times people get full of 389 00:29:49,400 --> 00:29:57,400 tactics, but not full of truth. So he wants not to elevate 390 00:29:57,640 --> 00:30:00,240 David, but he wants to remove David. 391 00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:05,920 So when his servants told David these words, it pleased, it 392 00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:08,320 pleased David well to become the King's son-in-law. 393 00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:12,880 Now the days had not expired. Therefore David arose and went 394 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:16,040 and his men and killed 200 men of the Philistines. 395 00:30:17,080 --> 00:30:24,120 Saul asked for 100 foreskins. David says brought their 396 00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:28,280 foreskins, 200 of them, and he gave them in full count to the 397 00:30:28,280 --> 00:30:31,840 king, that he might become the King's son-in-law. 398 00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:37,880 Then Saul gave him Michael, his daughter as a wife. 399 00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:44,520 Notice this. Saul is living in secrecy. 400 00:30:45,400 --> 00:30:50,040 He's living in this place of I'm going to do this in secret 401 00:30:50,040 --> 00:30:58,360 behind David's back so I could actually ruin his heart and his 402 00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:02,400 life. He is living what we would call 403 00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:08,440 a double life. The scripture says that he did 404 00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:13,360 this in secrecy. Now, double lives aren't just 405 00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:18,280 for spies. A double life is you portray one 406 00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:23,120 person in public as a father or as a person, but you live a 407 00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:27,520 whole nother way in private. Nothing is worse to a family 408 00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:32,920 unit than a leader of a family having the language of a life, 409 00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:38,040 but not the proof of that life. Nothing is more damaging to our 410 00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:42,880 children and to our wives in the homes that we get to lead. 411 00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:49,880 Listen then, living out all of the language of Christ and 412 00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:55,320 Christianity and following Him but not living the proof filled 413 00:31:55,400 --> 00:32:01,800 life that when the rubber hits the road you choose to be 414 00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:04,840 righteous. You see, You don't have to fear 415 00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:09,160 being caught if we make decisions out of Christ like 416 00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:15,120 character did. You see that doesn't start when 417 00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:19,560 we have kids. It started when we were kids and 418 00:32:19,560 --> 00:32:24,240 we claim to follow Jesus Christ. Well, I'll be this when I have 419 00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:27,760 my own family. You ever say that I when I get 420 00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:34,000 married, I will never when I have children, I'll never talk 421 00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:37,720 to them like my dad did. I'll never put them on 422 00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:43,080 discipline like my dad did. And now years have gone by and 423 00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:47,200 you have your own children and you have found within your own 424 00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:52,680 self traits that you picked up and that you live by that you 425 00:32:52,720 --> 00:32:55,280 actually said you would never do. 426 00:32:56,360 --> 00:33:00,760 Do you see what's happening? Character is formed on the 427 00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:07,160 decisions that we make and I often believe this is true about 428 00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:14,080 my own life and father's is this character just doesn't appear 429 00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:17,160 like $1,000,000 in your checking account. 430 00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:25,080 Character is daily investments that you've made because I think 431 00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:29,200 sometimes as dads, we are seeking to withdraw something 432 00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:35,960 that we've never invested. Now we want the time, but you 433 00:33:35,960 --> 00:33:40,080 never gave the time before. Now we want the attention, but 434 00:33:40,080 --> 00:33:41,840 you never gave the attention before. 435 00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:47,160 Now we want after all of these years where we have gone in the 436 00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:50,960 red in the checking account over and over again, now we want to 437 00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:55,760 withdraw out of this family something that we've never 438 00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:59,720 invested into that family. DC. 439 00:33:59,720 --> 00:34:04,440 The motto of our life is that we will reap what we sow. 440 00:34:04,880 --> 00:34:08,280 That does not mean that God can't redeem those things in 441 00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:12,000 those years. But understand that now is the 442 00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:13,960 time. And I think dads, if there ever 443 00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:17,600 was a time to live with urgency, it's right now. 444 00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:22,280 If there's ever a time that we live with some some some guts 445 00:34:22,280 --> 00:34:27,199 for the glory of God, it is right now that we find ourselves 446 00:34:27,199 --> 00:34:32,400 in a place where we're willing to make deposits now in our 447 00:34:32,400 --> 00:34:35,880 children, in our wives and our friends and in our community. 448 00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:38,360 And we will reap the benefit of that. 449 00:34:39,199 --> 00:34:42,960 But I think a lot like Saul, this didn't start in First 450 00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:45,960 Samuel 18, that this started way back in Saul's life. 451 00:34:46,560 --> 00:34:49,360 He's called to be king. Samuel's on the hunt for him in 452 00:34:49,360 --> 00:34:52,520 First Samuel chapter 10. And the Bible says this in verse 453 00:34:52,520 --> 00:34:57,840 22. There he is hiding among the 454 00:34:57,840 --> 00:35:04,040 baggage. And sometimes as men, we are 455 00:35:04,040 --> 00:35:14,320 found hiding among the baggage, caught in our old ways, in our 456 00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:17,240 old habits. And we continue to do and live 457 00:35:17,240 --> 00:35:22,280 in this vicious cycle, in this dance where God deals with my 458 00:35:22,280 --> 00:35:27,920 sin, but he also gives me the power to deal with my baggage. 459 00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:32,400 And that is where we're often finding ourselves. 460 00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:37,160 And I want you to hear what God said to Adam. 461 00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:44,840 Where are you? Come out, I'm Naked. 462 00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:47,640 And God says this. Even though you're naked and 463 00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:50,960 ashamed, I will sacrifice and clothe you. 464 00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:57,520 And this is what the Lord does, is He brings us from a double 465 00:35:57,520 --> 00:36:03,480 life into a single focus. Listen, come out of the baggage, 466 00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:08,440 filled with anxiety and secrecy. Come out of that baggage. 467 00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:13,200 Listen, come out of the baggage. We can praise Jesus with our 468 00:36:13,200 --> 00:36:17,840 lips on Sunday, and on Monday our mouth could be filled with 469 00:36:17,840 --> 00:36:22,680 cussing. Come out of the baggage, confess 470 00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:26,120 it is sin. Listen, you could cuss people 471 00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:28,440 out on Monday and praise Jesus on Sunday. 472 00:36:29,040 --> 00:36:30,960 That's not what God's called us to be. 473 00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:34,760 We we can claim to be faithful, but we will not break off from a 474 00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:40,560 secret romantic relationship. We continue to live a double 475 00:36:40,560 --> 00:36:45,120 life where we might flirt while you're married and covenant to 476 00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:50,160 somebody. Listen, we we want to guard what 477 00:36:50,160 --> 00:36:53,080 our kids watch, but we're older and more mature, so we don't 478 00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:57,480 guard what we watch. I think it's important that we 479 00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:00,480 understand. We often think that we can 480 00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:03,080 handle it. You can send illicit text 481 00:37:03,080 --> 00:37:08,840 messages and still proclaim the powerful name of Jesus. 482 00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:16,400 You can live a life that is double, but it always will lead 483 00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:20,960 to a level of trouble in your life. 484 00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:23,560 Double lives always come from double vision. 485 00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:27,600 Double vision is I'm trying to live like King Saul for what I 486 00:37:27,600 --> 00:37:32,520 want, but yet at the same time I'm hearing what God actually 487 00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:35,720 wants. Listen, living a double life at 488 00:37:35,720 --> 00:37:38,080 the very end, it doesn't look like James Bond. 489 00:37:39,080 --> 00:37:42,640 It doesn't look like Mission Impossible, it doesn't look like 490 00:37:42,640 --> 00:37:45,760 Jason Bourne. Living a double life, at the 491 00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:48,560 very end it always looks like this. 492 00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:53,880 Hearts are always broken, dreams are always shattered and 493 00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:59,200 children are always ruined. And my trust is always cancelled 494 00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:02,400 in the lives that I have torn apart. 495 00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:10,120 So Saul, his whole motive was what he could gain, not the 496 00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:14,160 glory of what God could do. And secrecy will always lead to 497 00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:17,880 anxiety because you're always anxiously looking behind your 498 00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:23,800 shoulder wondering who is going to find out. 499 00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:28,000 Your example is somebody else's experience. 500 00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:33,400 I was reading the story in Intentional Father, he writes. 501 00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:37,360 Imagine a farmer walk down a Backcountry road and saw another 502 00:38:37,360 --> 00:38:41,520 farmer repairing the fence. His young sons were helping him, 503 00:38:42,160 --> 00:38:44,480 and he said these words. Why are you letting your sons 504 00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:46,840 help you? The first farmer asked. 505 00:38:47,120 --> 00:38:49,400 It's going to take five times as long. 506 00:38:49,880 --> 00:38:54,120 You should do it yourself. Oh, but the farmer said, you've 507 00:38:54,120 --> 00:38:58,000 made a mistake. You think I'm repairing a fence? 508 00:38:58,440 --> 00:39:00,840 I'm not. I'm raising sons. 509 00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:08,040 Your example is somebody else's experience and you could choose 510 00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:13,200 to live in secrecy and anxiety, but it will always end in 511 00:39:13,200 --> 00:39:15,520 destruction. Notice the last thing that 512 00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:18,840 happens to King Saul. That how I could be a difficult 513 00:39:18,840 --> 00:39:22,200 dad and that is this. Notice this the Bible says in 514 00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:25,880 verse 28. Then Saul saw and knew that the 515 00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:28,800 Lord was with David, and that Michael, Saul's daughter, loved 516 00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:31,320 him. Notice what Saul realized is 517 00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:38,320 that the Lord was with David, and somebody else loved David. 518 00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:45,040 Notice jealousy, and Saul was still more afraid. 519 00:39:45,240 --> 00:39:48,920 Notice this word of David. So Saul became David's enemy 520 00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:51,520 continually. Then the Princess of the 521 00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:54,480 Philistines went out to war. And so it was whenever they went 522 00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:58,520 out that David behaved more wisely than all the servants of 523 00:39:58,520 --> 00:40:02,480 Saul, so that his name became highly esteemed. 524 00:40:02,520 --> 00:40:09,080 No, no, notice, Notice this. Saul lives now, if you're taking 525 00:40:09,080 --> 00:40:16,240 note #3 he has so much fear now. Everybody becomes the enemy. 526 00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:23,080 Everyone becomes the enemy. Everyone around Saul becomes the 527 00:40:23,080 --> 00:40:27,760 enemy. The one who has helped saw saw, 528 00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:32,200 saw was David. But now because of David's 529 00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:36,720 victory with Goliath and his name becoming popular, he now 530 00:40:36,720 --> 00:40:40,080 hates him. He becomes his enemy. 531 00:40:40,080 --> 00:40:41,440 But look at what happened to David. 532 00:40:41,680 --> 00:40:46,120 The Lord is with him, Michael loves him, and God esteemed him. 533 00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:50,160 So notice Saul hates him. He's jealous of him. 534 00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:52,520 He wants to get rid of him. Fear. 535 00:40:52,520 --> 00:40:54,960 He's frightened by him, the enemy. 536 00:40:54,960 --> 00:40:58,280 Now he fights with him. No, no, notice this. 537 00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:02,960 He used all of his energy to engage David as an enemy rather 538 00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:06,080 than surrendering himself to the Almighty God. 539 00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:08,200 Can I just say this to us as men? 540 00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:12,040 And I say this to myself, the most secure men are the most 541 00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:17,160 surrendered men. And I'll tell you something that 542 00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:21,720 I've had to learn over and over again, and that's this as a dad, 543 00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:26,320 as a husband, less vigilant, more vibrant. 544 00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:31,840 And what I mean by that is we are called to be protectors. 545 00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:35,680 We are called to be leaders. We are called to run towards the 546 00:41:35,680 --> 00:41:41,520 fight or whatever it might be. But listen, not everybody is 547 00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:46,280 your enemy. Not everybody's out to get you. 548 00:41:47,440 --> 00:41:52,720 How about in that moment that we stay aware, that we also stay 549 00:41:52,720 --> 00:41:56,000 vibrant, that we're bringing life into the room? 550 00:41:57,040 --> 00:41:59,680 My wife looked at me at dinner and she said, what? 551 00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:03,560 What's what's wrong with you? I said I got to sit on this side 552 00:42:03,560 --> 00:42:05,680 right here because I got to see who's coming through that door, 553 00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:12,720 she said. But I'm here, she said, you're 554 00:42:12,720 --> 00:42:17,240 more concerned with who's coming through the door rather than me 555 00:42:17,240 --> 00:42:18,720 sitting at the table in front of you. 556 00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:26,400 And I think many times in our lives, what we have faced, what 557 00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:31,240 we go through, can lead us to a place where we have become more 558 00:42:31,240 --> 00:42:35,800 vigilant than we have vibrant. And everybody becomes the enemy. 559 00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:42,200 Not everybody's your enemy. Listen, moralism will tell us to 560 00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:46,480 look at the behavior of David. Gospel transformation would tell 561 00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:48,040 us to look through the life of David. 562 00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:52,000 Because the life of David points me to another king. 563 00:42:52,880 --> 00:42:55,280 There are three kings that are presented in the book of First 564 00:42:55,280 --> 00:42:58,360 Samuel. The first king is King Saul. 565 00:42:58,720 --> 00:43:05,080 The second king is King David. The third king is the son of 566 00:43:05,080 --> 00:43:10,160 David, Jesus Christ. And notice what the Bible says 567 00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:14,760 about David, that he behaved more wisely than all the 568 00:43:14,760 --> 00:43:19,760 servants of Saul, so that his name became highly asteemed. 569 00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:25,200 Does that sound familiar? That sounds like what Paul would 570 00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:30,720 say of Jesus the King, that his name is above every other name, 571 00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:33,840 that in his name every knee will bow and every tongue will 572 00:43:33,840 --> 00:43:37,760 confess that Jesus Christ is Lord. 573 00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:44,280 As a follower of Jesus Christ, I now look through David to the 574 00:43:44,280 --> 00:43:50,480 Son of David, to one whose name is high above every other name, 575 00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:57,760 and that is Jesus. And it is Jesus who allows me to 576 00:43:57,760 --> 00:44:02,760 be the person that he's called me to be, redeemed by his blood, 577 00:44:03,080 --> 00:44:07,400 saved by his grace, and empowered by his Spirit. 578 00:44:07,720 --> 00:44:14,760 To live out, not just speak. To live out, to lay down my life 579 00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:18,480 for people. We hope you enjoyed this message 580 00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:21,680 and we'd love for you to join us in person every Sunday at 10:30 581 00:44:21,680 --> 00:44:23,280 AM. For more information and 582 00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:25,480 updates, visit wearebridgetown.com. 583 00:44:25,800 --> 00:44:27,760 Thanks for tuning in and we'll see you next week.