Hello. How we doing, guys?
Welcome back to another episode. You made it through another
week. OK, not laughing.
You're supposed to. There we go.
You made it through another week just clapping enough for you
guys. You got to, you got to, you
know, shit is Hard Out Here sometimes, even though we you
know, we did. We had that election in New York
and that was good. And we're, you know, most of us
are happy about that and. If the few.
Of you that listen aren't. It's OK man.
All right, we can disagree, but don't stop listening.
I got I, I got 3 drinks today. We got water, we got coffee
black. And then we got some kombucha
that I got at the store and I got it.
I got it. I got it for 50 dude.
I got it for $0.59 off. And I was that guy that saw that
it was cheap and then immediately signed up for the,
the, the card for Fairway. I was like, yeah, man.
Yeah, dude, I'm going to save $1.50 on three of these because
that's the economy that we're in and.
I want to do it. So I'm I'm drinking that.
It's pretty damn. It's pretty good.
Pretty sure I just spilled all over him, but you guys can't
see, so that's nice. It's a beautiful well, it's not
that beautiful. It's it's a rainy Sunday in New
York City and it's it's only it's only one which is good.
So, you know, sometimes I record this at night.
Sometimes they were recorded later in the day, but right in
the middle of the day feels good.
I started my day off nice. I spent 45 minutes on Facebook
Marketplace looking at vans like Van light vans that I can't
afford and I also don't really want you ever like look at
something that you go, I have that money, I could buy that.
And then you are like, wait, well what am I going to do with
that? What am I going to do with a
Winnebago? Maybe a Winnebago's on there for
like 40, like $4000. It's from 1991.
So already I'm like, that's probably not good.
But for I got to get, I got to get a, a moving.
I got to get a, a moving apartment and then just have an
apartment that I just, I just lived in that what that you
know, and become that guy. I'm sweating, by the way, why am
I sweating? What did I eat?
I didn't eat anything. Is it the dude?
It's like, what's the weather? Oh, it's because it's about the
rain. Maybe it's it's mad humid.
Because I was like, there's no way, like I should not be
sweating right now. It's it's not that hot.
Even though, you know, sometimes you, you eat like something
spicy, you eat meat and then you start sweating and then you just
feel gross and disgusting because your body is, is trying
to process the absolute garbage that you just ate.
And you guys know that this week was a big, let's see what's
going on with me. I hope you guys are doing well.
I'd ask him what's going on with you.
But this is kind of a one way St. you know, this week was a
lot of a lot of social. What's the word for it?
Not social requirements, but social, social duties.
So, so social things that I promised to do, you know what I
mean? What is the word that I'm
looking for? Whatever it is.
Yeah. I had a lot of social events
this week. And that can be draining.
Doing a lot of social things can be draining even even for people
that you care about and love, which they they that that's who
it all was for. Someone that I know got married.
And so I went to the wedding and then I went to the wedding party
the next day. One of my friends who listened
to the show, sometimes it was his birthday.
So I went to his birthday, his birthday drinking thing at on
last night, which is nice. Which hey, by the way, I love.
Being in your. 30s and all your friends, when they go out
drinking, what they really mean is like, let's drink from 7:00
to 9:30 and then we're all going to get tired and go home.
That's so nice. It is so nice being friends with
people in their 30s who were like, not still psychos.
'Cause there are. Still, some psychos who like
think admitting that you're tired and you want to get a good
night's of rest means you're lame and that they they're like.
No, we still got to go. Odd.
Just cause in my 30s doesn't mean I can't go out and they're
partying. Going crazy and it's like.
Yeah, but but you shouldn't you. You made it through your 20s,
dude. You did your 20s.
Just sit back and coast. For a bit man, you don't got to
do all that you don't have to I, I, I, I went so, so before I saw
my friend yesterday, I went to see another friend who is
visiting in town. So yeah, just seeing, actually I
saw two, I saw three different like nodes of friends on
Saturday. That's a lot, man, that's a lot.
And I like all of them. But still you're just like, this
is, this is just a lot to have to deal with.
So the, the first one I saw stopped by saw him that was
cool. And then his second one, he's
the same age as me. So I go there, I'd stop by like
4:00 PM and he had just woken up.
He's like, yeah, I went out like till 4:00 AM last night.
And I, I. Was like Oh my.
God, dude, what are you doing? What are you doing, man?
You don't you, you almost want to be like, you don't have to do
this anymore, dude. You want to like hand him a
book? You're like, have you ever heard
of reading? Have you ever heard of fiction?
Getting in the bed at 11:15, putting on just the side table
light and then reading a book for about 8 to 15 minutes before
you get tired and fall asleep. And then sometimes, like me,
you, you are so lazy that you don't get up and turn the lights
off. And then you wake up at 4:00 AM
in a bit of a terror because all the lights in the apartment are
on. But you know, you're
spontaneous. You're going to have a little
bit of fun, dude. I just wanted to say like, dude,
you don't 'cause he 'cause you just tell.
You could just tell he was hungover.
And man, the amount of like the amount of Jomo I had the joy of
missing out looking at him. Oh my God, Your 30s is all about
Jomo, Dude. We went to this party last
night. It was crazy up till 3:00 AM.
I'm so happy I didn't go to that.
I'm happy you went, but I'm so happy that I wasn't there.
Holy shit I would have paid you 200.
Dollars to to make sure I didn't go to that.
Oh my God, good saw them. That was great And then you
know, I'm really trying to work on this mic not picking up
drinking noises. I think if anyone here like does
any kind of audio engineering, it would be nice to know.
I think I can use a noise gate. We'll try it on the next
episode. We'll see.
We'll see how it does because I'll tell you, I think I posted
something on YouTube that YouTube didn't like and my
YouTube views for the last podcast dropped by I mean
there's. Not a lot in general, but they
dropped by what? What would I say 300%?
So that's good. All because I talked about what
did I even talk about? What did I even put up?
There's just certain things on YouTube where they're like, no,
we don't want you to talk about that.
And now we're just going to push everything down.
So anyway, and maybe he was about walking into the girl,
wiping her ass in the port a potty, which, hey, what are you
going to do? It happened to me.
It was a real experience and I was trying to share it.
I was trying to share my tringe and my embarrassment.
But anyway, I went home and then I saw my, my last friend and I,
I will say the, the, this week, the theme of this week, honestly
for me was showing up for people.
And that is something that the older you get, the more you
realize how important that is because a lot of people stop
showing up, whether it's for friendships, whether it's for
family, whether it's for relationships, even you, you,
you get comfortable and you coast and you forget that any
relationship at all is some kind of work.
Like you have to put in an effort to show the person that
you still you. You can only earn so much grace
and so much slack before someone is like, hey man, it feels like
you're not really trying anymore and you're leaning on the.
Fact that we grew up together but like what's what's up you
know and so this week for this week for me was sorry I was
messing with the podcast recorder this week for me was
all about showing up and. It was good.
I'm happy to. I'm happy to do it.
You got to show up. You got to show up for a friend.
Like one of my friends. I don't even talk to her that
much. But I knew her in college and
she got married and she, she had the wedding ceremony at the
clerk's office in the downtown New York.
And she texted me the night before and she was like, hey, I
saw you that you RSVP to the actual wedding ceremony.
Like, are you going to be there? And I said, yeah, she's like she
she goes, I thought you were going to cancel.
Like I, I didn't think you were actually coming.
And I go, no, I mean, we're getting older.
Like those things are the important things in life.
Like you should show up for those things.
Those things are what matter. Not getting dinner on a Friday,
like, or staying in, cancelling in those plans.
Yeah, that sucks. But it's like it's more
important to say, hey, when it really matters, the things
you're going to remember for the rest of your life, try to show
up for that. That that's, that's what this
week kind of felt like for me. And I was happy to do it
because. And now here's the thing.
Was I 2 minutes late to the ceremony?
And so because of that, I wasn't allowed in because the security
woman outside wouldn't let me in.
Yeah. And did I was I unaware that
that was the thing? Yes.
And was I upset? Yes.
And was I kind of embarrassed? Yes.
But does it also kind of fit into like who I am as a friend
that she would, that she would be like, OK, of course that
would happen with you. Yes.
But still felt bad. I'm not perfect working on it.
But earlier this week, I, I saw Lily, dude, I, I went to, I went
to Philly and I surprised Lily for her one moment show.
And that was so fun. Now a lot of you listening, you
know, Lily, you're all the core listeners.
And which by the way, guys, remember rate review the show,
share it, do all the good stuff, OK.
And then also call in 347-566-9741, texting, call in.
I don't know if you can send a voice note, but you could always
like record a video and then just just talk in it and make it
a black background or something. I don't know.
I mean, you could do that. I, I would, I would, I would
also watch that. But yeah.
And Lily is going to come on. That'll be that'll be a lot of
fun. But I went down to go surprise
her. She had a 11 moment show and I
had said I was going to go multiple times and then I always
like backed out for multiple reasons when she's in Philly.
So it's like not that easy to get to.
But regardless, I had said I was going to go and then I kept not
going. And then finally I was like, OK,
you. Have to go now.
You got to go because you can't be the guy that keeps saying,
yeah, I think I'll, I think I'll go and you don't.
You don't want to be that guy. And that was the beginning of my
week of showing up. I drove down on my quote UN
quote motorcycle. You know 300 CCS is a
motorcycle. I'm trying to get a bigger one,
but drove down on that. It was nice a little scary.
I was like going 70 on the 685 which.
Felt a little still. But it was fun, had a good time
stopped at a stop that gas stations 'cause I love stopping
on gas stations when you know, we've already talked about this,
but I love stopping on gas stations when you're on a road
trip. And it was good to I surprised
her. She didn't know I was coming.
She actually texted she actually, I texted her before I,
I, I, I tried to give her a little misdirect.
I go, hey, I saw that the show sold out.
Congratulations, no response. I know she looked at it and was
like she told me because I looked at it and I go I went,
oh, empty promises. And I knew it.
I knew what I was doing and she played right into it.
She had the emotions that I wanted her to feel so that then
when she saw me, she was. Extra surprised and maybe even
extra happy, so it was all worth it.
Sometimes you got to feel the bad emotions to.
Feel the even. Better emotions, am I right?
This kind of maybe sounds not healthy.
This could be used for unhealthy things.
But. For this specifically when it's,
you know, all good. It didn't hurt anyone.
It was fine. Saw saw my uncle saw my aunt and
uncle had a great time. She killed it very very funny.
Went back to her apartment. I had a meatball sub God love a
meatball sub love just a simple meatball sub and the meat wasn't
good. But still, sometimes it's just
nice to eat a like. Semi shitty sandwich and be
like, yeah, you know, I'm just a pig eating slop and I'm happy to
be a pig. This pig is happy.
I got I got no thoughts and I'm just eating my slop and I'm
happy to be alive. That's all.
That's sometimes all you can ask.
For in this, in this life and that.
And that's what I was doing, eating that sloppy eat.
OK, that's Paul eating that, that slop meatball sub, which I
guess in Philly they call Hoagies, which whatever, dude,
you have to change the name of everything just because you're
in a different place. I mean, I get it, but you're
only two hours away from New York.
It's just it's a sub. It's a meatball sandwich.
You don't, it doesn't have to be a hoagie like you're not that
far. I get is not maybe 90 miles as
far. I guess in Europe it's far.
Like. 5 miles, you're in a different country in Europe, but
in America 90 miles is nothing because we all have cars,
because we're independent and we're ruining the world with all
the gas that we're burning. So went down.
Sorry. It was great.
I felt good, man. Drove back up I tried vlogging
and I'm going to start vlogging. I won't be on the the YouTube
channel for anyway so it'll be on a different YouTube YouTube
channel but vlogged it. Looked at the vlog and was like
cool I'm missing so many shots. This is nice but.
Hey, that's part of the experience and that's part of
learning and I'm OK with it. I'm OK with.
I'm only a little mad about it. I've been trying not to get as
mad and worked up by things and. Maybe that's less entertaining.
I'm not sure. But I've been trying not to
start the episode and just yell or get mad because last week,
you know, we were talking about the being being at the at the
the bar and me getting in that almost fight with that Lady and
then a couple other things. And it was like you.
Know I sounded. Kind of mad.
I don't want, I don't want to be mad on the show.
I'm I'm trying to have a good time on the show.
I'm trying to I'm, I'm trying to do this.
This show is like, I'm just supposed to be having a good
silly goof time. Because here's the thing, man,
the media is now politics has has effused and pervaded like
everywhere. And there's so many things that
I and I don't know, I don't know if you guys can relate to this.
I feel like. 85% of the videos and the 85% of the media that I
consume, I feel worse after watching it and I don't know why
I keep watching stuff but I do anyway.
And then I just feel like shit at the end of the day and I kind
of feel like we all are doing this and we don't even realize
that we're doing it because we're like addicted to just
feeling that emotion of feeling bad.
But. I'm trying to stop that.
I'm trying to not have this be that there's a lot of other
places you can get that, but this here I'm I'm just trying to
just, you know, like I said, you tap into this.
This is digital. Touching grass obviously you can
go out and touch grass, which you should because I went on a
walk right before this and that was nice even a 5-10 minute
Walker. I got it cool.
I'm back in touch even you know, my feet are touching cement and
dog shit and you know a a place where some guy just pissed, but
it's. Still, I'm still technically out
there. I'm still touching the
proverbial grass. I should get a little tiny patch
of grass and put it on this desk.
I've thought about that. I want to do that.
And. But so like, like you, you tap
into this podcast, it's the only podcast where you get to have
your consciousness replaced by mind for 30 minutes to an hour
and you just go off and it's nice.
And you're just, you're just enjoying whatever it is.
It's a good time. It's good.
So what was I talking about, Garden?
The Williams showing up for people, that's what this week
was just showing up for people and it's nice.
It was even even my friend was like, wow, if it means a lot to
me that you came to me getting married and I was like, oh,
dude, like this is this is what it's about.
This really is what it's about. You know, in the beginning of
this podcast, it's not really funny, but this is real and this
is what I want to say like. This is this.
This is. What you need to be reminded of.
What you need to think about. You.
Need to show.
Up for people because a lot of people will let you down.
That is the sad thing about life and reality and human beings is
that a lot of people will let you down.
They won't be there. They'll get too involved in
their own stuff. They'll decide that for whatever
reason, you're not worth it as a friend anymore.
You don't give them enough whatever it is and.
I forgive people. For whatever they're going
through and then what they have to figure out about themselves.
Because I think most people don't want to let down other
people, but they don't realize they're doing it.
Everyone's SO. Caught up in their own mind and
ego and figuring out all the flaws in themselves because we
all got them. But people are going to let you
down. So if you are presented with an
opportunity to show up for someone, take it, man, Take it.
It'll feel good. And I think more people will
show up for you too. You got to give it to get it.
And that's the that's the reality.
I have a lot of people of I don't want to say let me down
but but not shown up for me at least at least in my career.
In ways that sometimes they're hard and some of it is the stuff
that I just have to deal with and say like, why did you have
that expectation? But sometimes you're like, damn,
that sucks and you want to and you want to.
When someone doesn't, when someone lets you down, you want
to be like, they're not doing it on purpose.
You want to think like that, but not always.
Sometimes you just got to. Sometimes you just got to have
the negative thoughts, bro. You just got to have them.
You got to have them for a short sweet amount of time.
You got to have the couple friends that you can like.
Just let the poison out and just you just like got to because
because you just got to hit the every look OK, talking shit.
We've talked about this in episodes so many times, but you
know what the coffee starting to hit and I'm starting to get on
the train and just just roll with me.
OK talking shit is not good but. Every now and then you just got
to release the pressure valve a little bit and you got to find
the two or three. It can only be two or three
people. You can't be talking shit to
everyone because then everyone's going to think, Oh my God, this
person is just a, it's just negative all the time.
But you got to find the two to three people.
Who they hate the same people you they hate the same people
and the same things that you hate.
And you can just get together and just let the bio, let the
black just let it out, dude. And you're like, yeah, man.
And you know you're being, you know this is bad, but you're
just slitting, letting the valve.
Off of just. A tiny bit that person is a but
the fuck I fucking. I saw the person the other day.
They. Fucking suck dude.
You sound like a child but it's real, dude, it's real.
Oh they suck. They don't deserve that thing.
I'm laughing because I'm laughing because it's real.
And I. Think you guys also get it and
if not, then whatever dude, this is the kind of fucked up I am,
but it's real and we all go through it and and here's the
thing here's the good here's what usually happens when you
let off the steam when you when you hit the pressure valve a
little bit and you let the bile out at the end, you usually
realize. I was being a little bitch.
I was. I was being a little gremlin.
And you realize that and then it's gone.
But it but if you just keep it inside and resentment builds and
you're just like, you know, fucking hell, that person like
that. And they looked at me like that,
you know, I think. They can wait.
Yeah, Yeah. Yeah, like, no, you can't have
that. Every now and then you got to
unscrew, stay, suck. And you go fuck, what am I
doing, man? They're fine.
It's all good. That's what you have to do for
real, dude, you got to do that. And you and you, and, and that's
how you really know who your friends are, like the close
friends. And if you're, I've talked about
this so much, so many times, and I'm going to keep talking about
it. Hey, it's my podcast.
I'm going to keep talking about it.
It's all good. You, you, you have to be the
friend. That you can't always be this
friend, but you got to really try to be the friend that is
there for that other friend talking shit and not immediately
play devil's advocate. Cause a lot of times, and I do
this too, you just want to be the contrarian.
I don't know why it's a bad habit.
I have it. Other people do as in my life do
as well. And it pisses me off when they
do it, but I do it to them. So I know that pisses them off
too. So I got to just take a step
back and go, you know, don't throw glass, glass marbles in
the in the tin can house, whatever the fuck the The thing
is. Stones, stones in glass house.
Can't do that. But just sit there and be like,
yeah, bro, that sucks. Yeah, bro, they do kind of suck.
Yeah. Or just just let them just let
them let the valve off and then you can go, all right, we done,
we done talking shit. And I go, yeah, you're right.
I'm being up. That's how it goes.
I'm going to clean my glasses. That's how it goes.
And sometimes you can do it on your own.
You can write in your journal, you can do all that.
But every now and then friends sit in a coffee shop or maybe
drinking. I don't really drink, but like
at a bar, just talking shit feels nice.
It's kind of what life is about. Sometimes life is about really
important things, but and that knows that.
And hey, that ties back to that's also showing up.
Showing up for your friend is knowing that they're in a bad
mood or whatever and letting them talk a little bit.
But then at the end being like, OK, man, but like, what can,
what can you do? How are you feeling?
What's going on? Because if they're letting the,
if they're letting the valve off every single day, something
deeper has happened to them. And then you got to have that
conversation. Hey, bro, what the what's,
what's good? Because you, you know, you're
becoming Gremlin. You're you're sprouting horns.
Your skin is turning orange and green.
What's good? But I'm but meanwhile I am
feeding my gut Biome because health aide says follow your gut
and that's what I'm doing. I'm following my gut and is it
bullshit? Probably, but oh just hit the
camera. But.
His long ass legs. But.
Doesn't matter, I feel good. It's it's the we're all doing
the placebo effect anyway. So showing up this week was
good. And I'll finish that off with,
you know what sucks about drunk people?
So like when you're drunk, you'll just say whatever, right?
Drunk people have no filter and the problem with that is that
sometimes there are no filtered comments are right on the money
and they really just hitch to the core guy.
Last night I go to meet one of my best friends last night and
he is with one of his middle school friends and I meet this
guy and I go hey what's up my name is Dylan and before he even
tells me his name he goes. You kind of give him that guy
from the Sonic movies. I'm like, what do you mean he
goes the villain and I'm like, you mean the.
Super. The fat villain with the skinny
legs and the giant moustache. Sorry, sorry.
The bald fat villain with the giant moustache and really
skinny legs. He's like, Yep, that exactly.
And I'm like. OK hey man, I literally just met
you. I know that you're blacked out,
but please don't hit me with something that really hurts
because it's kind of too true. Because I looked it up and he he
was right on the money and it was a bullseye straight to the
heart. It was a headshot.
Clean clean. Freaking split my right down the
middle. 50 caliber head exploded.
Saving Private Ryan right out of the boat.
Poo. Pink and I'm just right through
the helmet. Remember in Saving Private Ryan?
When when? God, that movie.
Is, is, is. Seared into every boy from their
early 2000s brain. Like I actually think about the
I think about the opening scene is Saving Private Ryan.
No joke, Once a week I'm not exaggerating.
And I go thank God that that's not me.
Because number one, I'm older now.
I no longer have main character syndrome.
I have background character syndrome.
So when I watch Saving Private Ryan and I see some guy just get
decapitated by a 50 caliber bullet, and I just see some guy
get decapitated by a 50 caliber, I go, that's me.
The guy who can't even get out of the boat.
He just tries to go over the side and goes and then just
falls into the water. And slowly.
Sinks to his his death I go. That would be me.
I'm not Ryan. I'm not Tom Hanks.
I'm Vin Diesel. Doesn't Vin Diesel's head
explode? No, that's that's someone else.
But remember in in in that scene when they're on the.
Beaches and the There's one guy on the radio, there's, there's a
captain who's talking to a different guy on a radio and he
keeps going back and forth and he's calling out different
locations and different coordinates and the camera pans
with him to talk to someone else.
And then it pans back and the guy's head is gone.
It's just literally missing and just there's just black ash.
Around it. That was me.
When the guy told me that I look like the villain from Sonic the
Hedgehog. I was like drink or it doesn't
even make a noise just like I'm like you got me, you got me or
in Fury same thing happens in Fury there's like 3 tanks and
they're just they're just driving towards other tanks and
they're just shooting giant artillery at each other, which
already is kind. Of like, dude, what?
Do what? What Just try to soar?
I don't know, a little bit of motion.
Can a white boy in a tank then have a little bit of motion?
I need to watch Fury again. That movie is I'm in, I'm in
that era where I'm just like, I want to watch people in in war
just going through it and somehow and like, you know, that
movie's not a happy movie, but somehow as a guy you watch and
you're like, this is good. I would go, I would go through
that. But again, me background
character syndrome. I'm like, I'm the guy in the
tank that gets blown up immediately or someone throws A
grenade and they're like. No way.
And then but in it someone they they, they, they should have
artillery piece in the guy who is driving the tank, he just
disappears. Literally just disappears.
Honestly a great way to go out. It sucks for the person seeing
it, for the person that happens to you're just like pink, bye
bye, you're gone. Not too bad.
And I'm doing great, by the way. But he said that he really.
I wanted to get mad, but he was so right that I just went.
I mean, I, I, I messed with him a little bit, but I was like,
hey, you know what, dude, you kind of got me.
I, you know, I could turn this around on you and be like, yeah,
well, you're just every blacked out drunk piece of shit
character in a movie. But I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to do that. You're the guy that doesn't know
how to drink too much and his girlfriend's going to berate him
for being embarrassing at the bar when they get.
Home. But I'm not going to do that,
dude. You see, if we're a good guy,
I'm not going to bring that up. I could attack you for your
looks. But I'm not going to.
OK, because this weekend I'm showing up for people, and that
means I'm showing up for my best friend singing across from me,
and I'm just going to take it and nod and go, OK, He didn't
mean anything about it. He's drunk.
It's all good. But you know.
There's there's a part. Of me kind of wanted to, you
know, I've been watching a lot of vlogs recently and I've been
watching a lot of guys just go to desert islands and try to
survive or like a force in the middle of nowhere.
And I got to tell you, man, I love it.
What is it about being, what is it about guys that they just
want to go to the middle of nowhere and try to survive?
Like what is and, and it's not just me.
There's millions of views on these things, 10s of millions of
views. A guy who's like.
I'm getting dropped off in this island in the middle of nowhere.
All I have is a toothpick and a Tamagotchi from 1995.
Let's see if I can survive for the next 15 days.
I'm here in the middle of the Caribbean.
It is hurricane season. There is a Class 6 hurricane
coming and all I have is a slice of almond cake.
Let's see how long I can survive for, I mean.
If they're if they they could, they'd be like.
Hey guys, I'm currently in the depths of hell.
Behind me is a bunch of demons that are torturing people.
All I have here is an expired Costco membership card.
Let's see how long I can survive with getting tortured in the
lava. Remember to like and subscribe.
Like that's and I would watch it.
I would watch all of those. It's just something about it.
It's this thing of like, it's basically all guys.
Here's what it is. All guys think that they could
survive in the wilderness, but instead of testing themselves,
they just watch some other guy do it.
And I'm like, yeah, that's exactly what I would do.
Oh, yeah, good. That or, or they're like taking
notes. They're like, oh, yeah.
When? Because I think every guy
secretly thinks at one point in his life.
He is going to. Have to survive on a castaway
like situation in some island or just in the middle of the
forest. And so they're watching these
things like taking notes like all right, yeah, I'm going to
have to remember this one day. We're going to have to remember
this from the test. This is how you start a fire.
This is how you bring build. This is how you build a lean to.
Shouldn't drink too many coconuts in one day, I will get
gastrointestinal issues. This is how you spearfish.
This is how you use a Hawaiian sling.
Hawaiian sling in many ways, kind of better.
Oh, oh, I shouldn't eat that fish because it's poisonous.
Oh, limpets. Now I know how to cook limpets.
I should look for limpets, you know.
I I truly feel. That and I'm watching it and I
am taking notes. And who knows?
I mean, I'm just going to put myself in that situation, but I
am going to bring, I'm going to bring shit I would never just
like. I mean, listen, I made me a lot
of money, obviously. But whenever I'm watching him,
I'm watching this dude Xander Budnick, which is also great
names Xander Budnick and. He's going out there with like
15 things. And I go and, and I'm watching
him do this and I, and I'm, I'm just wondering, I would love to
meet him just to be like, OK, dude, when you're watching this
video, is there not a part of you that's like, God, if no one
watches this, I'm going to be so upset or, or like you're halfway
through and you go like, what the fuck am I doing?
What am I doing right now? I should have gone to law
school. I'm trying to survive in monsoon
season somewhere off the coast of Indonesia.
What? Why?
You're just like, what went wrong?
What went wrong? What did I do?
Wasn't my parents, wasn't my friend in fifth grade.
I did have that bully that one time.
What led me? What led me here?
I mean, I could say the same thing.
What led me to talking for? I don't have time to get into
that. But it dude, it's, it's it.
Is fun to watch and it's like weirdly calming too, because
you're because, because you're, because you're watching.
And I'm just like, man, I'm so happy to not be that guy.
I'm really, really so happy to not be on that island.
And instead I'm in my bed. I'm about to read Voltaire.
I'm I'm, I'm going back to my liberal arts type shit and I'm
going to read Voltaire. It's going to be nice.
They have like programs. When we look this up.
They have like programs where you can get dropped off like in
the wilderness. What would I call?
It like survival program? Oh fuck no what would it be?
What would it be called? Like company drop?
Like what? Did he drop you off middle of
nowhere? Like let's see is OK.
They they Yeah. AI is like if a company drops
you off in the middle of nowhere.
Prioritize your safety like survival companies.
Vacation like what? Here we go.
Oh wow, OK, found it dude. It's called do castaway survival
vacations on deserted islands. This is what he does, I think.
Is that that's that's to do with the big beard.
What the fuck is his name? Wow.
You know what I'm actually surprised I'm seeing a lot more
non white people doing this. Wow.
I mean the people that they have you guys can't see this, but the
oh, this guy's fully just naked. Jesus Christ.
The three they said just they're just filming this guy naked.
I mean, just put something on him.
Wow. The Robinson Experience, Our
desert islands. The Castaway.
Wait, how much is this? We are a castaway travel company
specialized in the holidays and experiences in remote desert
islands around the planet. Do Castaways offers you do
castaways a unique experience unknown until now on a real
uninhabited island. Two types of deserted island,
survival and comfort. You can survival mode or offers
comfort mode. OK, what's the OK, let's see
what let's do What's comfort mode?
How much is it? Philippines marooning basic
bamboo cottage with a kitchen and bathroom located on a
private beach of a deserted island.
It's a it's $100 a night. That's OK Blue Lagoon,
Indonesia, $200 a night pro own private island.
Interesting. Polynesia.
I do. OK, this is actually looks kind
of fucking sick. You're legit in the middle of
nowhere. OK, OK, this is.
Whatever this is like this is just basically Airbnb.
But what's the let's go to the the survival mode.
Bro $200 How is it going to cost you more to go to survival mode?
One of the most popular desert islands.
Our team will be standing by the nearest island in case of
emergencies. What the fuck?
Wow. OK, this is man, I don't want to
be the person that's like this is some white people shit.
You know, like people on TikTok say that, but this kind of is
the the castaway will stay with a guard at the only entrance of
the island. Wow, this is wild.
And you know what's even worse? I I.
Totally. Kind of.
I like, kind of want to do it. The fuck is wrong with me, dude?
Actually, you know what? This.
Fuck it, fuck it. Our castaway clients.
Let's see our heroes, dude. In the last 10 years, company
has helped more than 800 people. That's not as many as I thought
it would be. 90% are from North America and Europe.
Yeah, I'd say so. Wow, that's what I mean.
It's still a lot dude. Imagine paying like $1000 to go
to and there's no like nothing. And I'm going to do it.
I'll probably do it next year. Yeah.
And hey guys, you know what if, if, and guess what if they were
like. Dude, if they just.
Paid for the island. I would probably go this is and
this is the mental illness of me and it's OK, that's all right.
Do castaway the fact that someone thought this was a thing
and they have a full ass website and are making enough money.
Is OK, Hold on. Here's survival 24/7.
OK, there's dew castaway. There's desert island survival.
Survival 24/7. Let's look at this one, $2500.
Yeah. I mean, that's how many days.
A condensed core. How how long is it to go with
the local instructor put some scare handling experience with
both floor and fauna. Amazon rainforest.
Yeah, but like, how long is it? No.
What's? Oh Jesus, it's 9 days.
And you get meals, OK, And you get flights, OK.
All right, well. There's a lot.
You know what there's? Something for everyone.
That's what's that's what's cool.
It's there's really is something for everyone as this podcast is,
but it it should be something for a lot, a lot of everyone,
not just a a few of everyone. You know, I'm going to do 2.
I'm going to. I'm going.
To go do castaway in the next year, 100% everyone wants to go
to a forest. I was watching that watch that
vlog and then, hey, let's, let's watch what what happened with
this guy that just passed out during Trump's speech.
Let's watch this. Can you?
No, not. OK.
Wait, hold on. OK, wait actually OK, so before
this is OK, I need I need to screen record this so I can have
it on the YouTube let's do screen recording.
Yeah, great. Cool bro do.
You guys know how this? Who?
Who is? Oh yeah, my Lord.
Hair done. Relic Rhymes.
Have you guys seen this guy? You calling me my Lord, My Lord
drift down in designer and some shit you can't afford you're.
Broke walk down with my OK this is.
The guy that's dressed up like, the guy that's dressed up like
Lord Farquaad. Now, when I first saw him
online, at first I was like, this guy is just doing another,
just another viral whatever thing, right?
And then he kept at it. It's kind of funny.
But now that he raps and he's in his is still doing it in first
of all, he's, you know, in a a wife are some people calling it
wife lovers instead of wife beaters?
Whatever. He's in a tank top, white tank
top, you know what I'm saying? And he's got the Lord Farquaad
hair and he's honestly kind of good.
Relic Rhymes. OK, his name is Relic Rhymes.
So funny though the caption Relic runs popped out to the
station and went dumb with his in studio perfume.
My Lord. In parentheses, hair done.
You're too. Broke to go to war.
FN on my body. You know what the fuck?
Is for. I mean, there's.
Not that you're there's, there's there's definitely not an FN.
Also, isn't is FN a gun? I got to be real with you guys.
I hear it all the time. I don't know.
It is a gun, right? OK.
Oh it's literally just FN America.
It's the firearms. Don't know FN her style, a
fabric nationale, her style. It's just a it's a little legit.
Just it's just a pistol. OK, I thought it was I thought
it was a different because because future talks about OK
FN, the FN bullets go through domes.
Is that a different FN bullet? Let's see.
OK, is the FN bullet different? There we go.
FN bullet refers to the FN 5.7 by 28 cartridge, a high velocity
around developed by FN Herstal or the Full Metal Jacket.
I think he's talking about Full Metal Jacket.
OK, but the FN on my on my on my hip.
You don't have an FN on your head, bro.
Look at you. You're 55 and you're just like
for Farquaad. But maybe you do.
I just. Got my head done, bitch said.
I got my head. Done and the hair looks fired.
Oh, OK, yeah. OK.
And what happened with it? You know, the world is so stupid
that I'm I'm I love this. I used to be like this is wack.
But he's got a thing and he always has the hair on and it
has to be a wig. But.
He, he, he is, he dressed up as Dora the Explorer.
That's cool. He is going for it.
And and you know, in in this world now I I can only just I
can only just salute you. I salute you, bud, get after it.
What are you going to? It could be worse.
He has merch. His merch is really fuck.
What's does he have anything with the relic?
And now see, dude, here's the problem.
I saw relic in real life. Most people you got to make
merch with the hair, like more of it with the hair.
It is a gift. And a curse though, like being
one of those people that's known for your look in the in the
arts, because he's going to have to just be like that for the
rest of his life. You can't really, you can't
really pivot as a Lord Farquaad guy and then just go, well, now
I'm just a normal rapper. I don't think so, man.
It's not really. It's not going to work.
Unfortunately it's not going to work so I don't know what to
tell. I bet that was it was pretty
fire. Oh yeah, let's let's end with
what happened with this guy fainting guy faints Trump.
Guy like a guest collapses near Trump and someone said it was a
A. Of course the video is Trump
looking at the camera and the guy's just passed out behind him
and he doesn't give a shit. We're not getting political,
though. Let's see who it was the man was
at the event for the president's announcement of his weight loss
drug cost reduction. I mean these pictures are so
funny. You got to watch the YouTube for
these pictures. Trump is just like look at this,
he looks he could not care less. Guy's dead.
In front of them. Oh shit.
Oh I hope he doesn't shit. All over the I.
I hope he doesn't. I hope he does Not bleeding.
Can we make sure he doesn't give you to mess up the rug?
Wow. And then this one crazy guy does
not give a guy does not care. I mean the, I mean the.
OK, who did this? ABC News yeah, ABC News is, is
is doing him a little dirty, but he's did still make these.
But I guess what are you supposed to do?
Like, just like, just a thumbs up.
Just try to give him mouth to mouth.
That would be fire. That would be fire if Trump like
dropped down and was like, please, please, no.
Here's the David David Rick's Eli Lilly chair.
If you've ever been to the Oval Office, you stand a long time
and it's warm. I'm pleased to say the White
House medical staff did a great job.
This is a ChatGPT. You stand a long time and it's
warm. What?
How is that an excuse? In April, Dr. Oz was cut short
after his granddaughter appeared to pass out.
Oh said that the man he represented one of the people in
the can I not can we not watch this?
I I got to watch this is like, OK, come on, stupid ass.
OK, ABC, we. Negotiate it to lower the cost.
Why is there music? Behind is at the White House.
I mean, sources tell Zeph found it.
And. It's well, it's not going to
show it, is it? This is so annoying I.
Hate it when man. Collapses.
I have to go to Access Hollywood to actually see it is a meal.
We're talking, OK, I don't want to listen to a Pandora
commercial, but I have to go to Access Hollywood to see it
instead of going to ABC, you know, see this.
Is why the whole fake news thing is kind of real.
It's like, guys, you're not helping yourself, you're doing
click bait. God damn it.
OK, here we go. OK, so this guy right here, it
looks like Jerome Powell, but I I think that's Doctor Oz.
That's crazy that that's what he looks like.
Dude does not look. Turkish at all?
Oh. Dude's gone.
He just literally a man. Collapsed.
It's funny. He did it right after Trump's
like, and the drug is going to be $2.00.
He's like, oh. He's like, it's like all my
stock that I've insider traded is now going to go down.
Yeah, what happened? Like what happened?
It's just so funny about his. Company, you OK when suddenly a
man who has yet to be identified started stumbling before slowly?
Collapsing to the floor. Oh my God, I don't need to hear
you talk about this, but dude, Trump it.
OK? Actually, you know what?
I'll, I'll give it to him. The pictures were not as good.
Trump Elise gets out of his seat.
Let's let's see OK, here's a different angle we've.
Been advancing. Science and creating and starts
to go right Yep, there it is there we go.
So you can see you're watching. Oh, let's watch from this angle.
So the guy's going in America so bored.
He's so bored realizing how much money he's going to lose and
right there he goes. Oh, he takes his step forward.
He's oh, I'm about to lose so much money today.
We Oh, you OK? You OK?
You bet, Gordon you're fucking this up for me.
Gordon, you OK? He just he's he.
Was he? Looks like his face is melting.
Creating high value jobs. He tries to stop himself.
It's. Not going to happen.
Hey, we. Oh shit.
You. OK.
Gordon, you OK? Oh, OK, Trump.
You know what? I'll give it to him.
Trump gets out of his seat, he gets he gets up pretty spry.
No, let's let's be real. I hate the guy, but still pretty
spry. But then he kind of.
Just watches him die on the ground.
So, Gordon, you OK? Do you imagine that white?
House. Employees.
Oh my God, dude, the guys. Like like area?
And move them into the White House.
Oh, they lifted his legs up. Oh my God, they put him in a
change your diaper position. That's rough, dude.
That's really rough. At least he's old.
Because if this happens. To you when you're under 50,
that's that's really embarrassing.
I just love the. Gordon, you OK?
Creating high value jobs. But he accepts.
OK, So he's like starting to fall forward and that today we
are you. OK, Gordon, you.
OK, Gordon. Hey, what are we, Gordon?
Gordon, come on. Please.
Gordon. Hey, right here.
Come on. He gives him a little treat.
Gordon, Come on. Come on.
Gordon, We talked about this. We told you to drink water
before. You know, that happened to one
of my that happened actually at a wedding when when I was
officiating the wedding. One of the best men just.
I guess locked his knees and passed out.
Why does locking? I've always heard locking your
knees can lead you passing out and I'm going to be real.
I've never believed it, but I I know it's a thing.
The decrease in blood flow to the brain, your leg muscles
become immobile. This prevents the muscle from
pumping blood back up to the heart, causing blood to pool in
the lower extremities. As a result, there's there's
less blood returning the brain, which can lead to a drop in
blood pressure and fading. I just like who?
Also who locks their knees when they're standing?
It hurts, right? Is it just me I've?
Never I've never fainted from that I've fainted from getting
up too fast. Well, not like like almost
fainted. Your your eyes start to go like
like and it really kind of feels good.
You want to just be like take Jesus, take the wheel.
You do kind of want to just be like you know time to sleep for
a little bit sleeping from a faint must be like this.
The sleep from AI know it's not long.
It's only like a minute, but that must be a really deep
sleep. You just fall.
You're just like, oh. My God.
Yeah, that's got to be really nice.
So embarrassing live news. So embarrassing to have that
happen. OK, let's end real quick with
we, we got a, we got a, we got another text message today,
Google Voice. I don't think there's anything
else for us to follow up on from last week.
And the only other thing I want to talk about was let's see, no,
wait a SEC. Now that we'll talk about Disney
rational 1 of the time that, that, that that's Evergreen.
We talked about the we talked about what's his name something
Relic. Rusty Relic.
I was, I was just looking at him.
Right. Relic.
Yeah. Dude, it's fire.
Dude, it's 100% fire. Let's go to Google Voice.
Remember 56947566 No 347 566-9741 Remember to hit the
hotline, hit the hotline, get some advice.
You heard what happened with that dude with his the dude with
his what was it? The God, what am I saying bro?
I just completely lost it. The dude who would kiss the
other guy so he remember he, I was reading it and I was like,
bro, there's no way this is real.
It is. He was like, Yep.
They just announced that one of them was pregnant and they're
like 28. I thought they were.
I thought they were a lot younger.
So I mean, I hope that guy gets better.
What we we got a call in from North Carolina.
She goes I was recently invited as a + 1 to a surprise for my
boyfriend's Co worker. The workplace is pretty close
knit and they all go out together frequently, so I've met
the friend group several times throughout the past year.
The party was hosted at the birthday person situation ships
apartment birthday OK already. Why?
If you're a situation ship, you shouldn't be OK now he OK.
Here's what that says to me. The girl in the situation ship.
Wait hold on. Just my boyfriend's coworker?
I'm guessing the boyfriend's coworker is a guy.
I think because the party was hosted at the birthday person
situation ships apartment. If you're hosting a party for
someone's birthday, you're no longer in a situation ship full
stop. Shit is it's getting real then
it is not a situation ship. But that how so?
My boyfriend and I got there early while the core group of
friends in charge of setting up the surprise was finishing up.
Someone suggested that we put on a YouTube video for Ambience and
the first ad. But like what YouTube video, you
know, Cafe Cafe jazz in the background and it has a little
coffee cup with like the the fake steam slowly coming up from
it and then a cat purring. You guys ever watch those?
Sometimes I would put those on late at night and it's just and
you can tell it's just being looped over and over again, but
you're still like anything's better than the hell hole of the
city that I'm living in. Someone suggested that we put on
a YouTube video on for ambiance and the first ad that popped up
of this dude's apartment was for Blue Chew.
The TV blaring out weak erections said the shockwave of
silence of the apartment and everyone did their best to not
cackle. Well that is sad, especially
because most ads are targeted for you so.
We know that guy's having issues sometimes, which I'm not.
I'm definitely as a as a consistent user of blue chew
every now and then I've used it and I've enjoyed it and I've
gotten many headaches after using it.
No shame. But you do have to be searching
something how how to make my Dick work on YouTube for like
for blue chew to be sent to you. That's so interesting.
That sucks, dude. That's so embarrassing,
especially because I feel like if you're getting blue chew, if
you're like getting blue chew ads and you're using blue chew,
you're probably single because you're going out.
You're you know, you want to have that just in case the
breaking case of emergency. I'm I'm out with someone new,
got to make sure I perform and I think that's how a lot of guys
think about it. That's how I thought about it.
And so you're at a situationship apartment and if your situation
ship, they're probably hooking up consistently and he might not
need it with her. So then in her mind, she's like,
who is he using? Oh, wait, hold on a second.
Is it the dudes apartment? Oh, the birthday person
situation ships apartment. So OK, doesn't matter.
So it could be a girl or the the the person whose birthday is
what? Because it could be a girl or
guy doesn't matter. But what I'm saying is that the
person whose birthday it is, oh, but they didn't have to see.
OK, see, I'm figuring this all in time.
So luckily here's here's what's good about this.
The person who would have been most uncomfortable about this
didn't get to see the blue the blue chew commercial, even
though if there's they're hanging out at the situation.
She has a place a lot and they're watching YouTube, which
they may they may or may not be, I don't know.
They're probably just watching Netflix, but they might watch
YouTube. They might be watching outdoor
boys. If they're seeing this, they're
going OK, Who else are you hooking up with that you need
the blue chew? Because Google knows all it
knows your order in blue chew or use in Roman or something.
Who else are you hooking up with?
Because I know you're not using it for me because the other
other night you said it, it happened because you were tired.
We could do it in the morning. So who's this for?
But then all the friends are seeing that and they're like,
damn, homie has homie has trouble getting it up and homie
is also in the streets because that's what that mean.
That would that's what that would mean to me.
This dude is getting after it. That's what I think when I see a
Bluetooth when I see a blue chew commercial.
Damn RIP. RIP.
Hopefully they didn't say anything you.
Just got to keep that shit to yourself.
Just keep the shit, Don't tell the situation shit, don't tell
anyone. Just keep it to yourself.
And maybe maybe, maybe you can try to make a.
Joke and be like. It's crazy I get the same
commercials as you. That's wow.
I mean, they must be sending them to anyone because I get
those same commercials and I I sure as hell don't need it.
Wow. Just be like.
Well, we know someone's Dick is hard.
Hey, who needs a coat rack when he's taking blue chew and his
cock's so hard? So pull it out right now and see
how hard it is. Does it work?
Because also that's the thing when someone when a guy finds
out that you take blue chew then.
Or are you taking any kind of performance enhancing drug, any
kind of sexual EDED drug, When it gets quiet, he'll come up to
you and be like, hey man, by the way, like do you have any extra?
And I don't need it but like I wanted.
To try if you don't get any extra.
By the way, like I definitely don't need it, but like do you
like do you like using blue shoe?
I I wouldn't, I wouldn't need. I've never had an issue, but
like sometimes I thought like, maybe I could, I could, I could
get harder and like, maybe like I maybe I thought like I could
get, I could have even less of an issue.
So like you got any extra, you got a hookup, you got a coupon
code. Always all my friends, basically
every single one of them was like, yo, you have any extra?
Let me try Just I just want to know.
It's like, it's OK, dude, you had five Ipas the other night
and your your shit was overcoat linguine.
It's all good. And it happens to all of us.
Well, it happens to about half of us.
I'm actually probably less than half of us in the population.
There's only half of the population's men and it doesn't
happen to all of them. Some dudes are just one of my
friends is like, Oh my God, this guy's going to be horny for the
rest of his life. You know, there's some guys
where you're just like, oh, you're never going to stop being
a horny dude. And that's honestly, that's sad.
That sucks. You're just going to be like
that forever. You ever met a horny 74 year
old? You're like, dude, put it away.
You're not supposed to be doing this.
Take your grandkids to Disneyland.
Don't be a. Creep, but some of them can't.
They can't help it. And that's a sad it's a sad
life. Anyway, thanks for thanks for
sending that in North Carolina and I hope.
You guys, I hope you guys enjoyed.
Your little break from consciousness and your little
break from reality with this, be sure to, like I said, rate and
review, subscribe on YouTube, send in some advice, questions,
and I'm just overall, let's keep the show going, Let's keep it
up, let's keep it growing. It'll be a good time.
I will. Talk to you.
Guys, next week remember to show up for your friends, man.
Remember, it feels good and it's how you keep relationships
around and it's how you make this life worth living, OK?
Have a good week. Bye.