Is it anyway anyway. Hello and welcome to whose song
is it anyway? I'm dr.
Haley Bosher. And for this special season of
the podcast focusing on women in the music industry I'll be your
host. Thank you so much for being on
the hissing, Is It? Anyway, podcast today Imogen
it's a pleasure to have you and you're one of the only guests
that we've had on this podcast twice.
So you're basically a regular now.
Okay. Well, I hope this continues for
you this trend. Yeah, so really excited to have
you back to talk about sex, slightly different from last
time, but just in case, there's anybody listening who doesn't
know you or didn't listen to the previous episode, which I don't
believe that there is. But anyway, just for
completeness. A yeah.
Can you fly Please introduce yourself and tell us a little
bit about who you are and what you do.
So my name is Imogen Heap, and depending, how old you are, what
country you're from, what kind of job you're in?
You might know me for all kinds of different things.
Some people just know me for one song which is called hide and
seek, and it's a cappella that uses a harmonizer.
So it just hear my voice and it's a very beautiful song and
that's kind of sustained, you know, probably about 20 percent
of my income for the last 20 years.
Maybe something like that, maybe not.
That's probably ridiculous. And there's a lot of income from
that one summer got, right? But if you're somebody with a
child and who's had a child under two from six years ago,
then you might know me for the Happy song and you might not
know any other songs but there's a song I wrote called the happy
summer which is probably my second most popular song which
is a song that makes babies happier.
Scientific equipment and worked with scientists that sounds all
a bit kind of weird and contrived but there's actually a
lovely song and I wrote it intentionally.
So that, you know, parents sued, having a hard time with their
child from personal experience that this is to be able to get
like a couple of minutes of peace.
So I wrote that for that, but I also make technology, I've
developed some gloves over the last 10 to 12 years.
We want them to be able to reach inside my computer and not have
to kind of hunched over it. And one likes a my voice.
So add some kind of Reverb to a piano line or something I can do
or in the flow of the performance.
I've also been working on digital identity system for
Music Makers. So a lot of people have got
chain space. Eight years ago, I heard about
me because I was the first person to really serve piece of
music with a smart contract and most recently in the last Is,
which is one of the investment to you about Helen Lawson was a
Imaging or emerging as the Maricopa.
Hey, I'm Odin and AI is all the way to now and but for years
ago, I was like, I need to find a way to simplify my life, and,
to help fans, or journalists or any one kind of be able to
interface with me without me having to be 24/7.
So, that was the initial idea, but now Legends come taken a lot
of different terms and soon, mojin will have a voice.
It's much, like mine, you'll be able to sing one.
So that would be Coming out soon if it's all in that concern, you
release this podcast only so that's going on.
Yeah, I do lots of things basically, but I'm and I also
make music, I make music with a Harry Potter play and I've done
lots of bits and bobs for, you know, whenever I can do any, for
bringing in cash, but ultimately, it's just, I just
love to do what he's crazy projects.
And as recently, I've been diagnosed ADHD and it does kind
of like make a lot more sense about what I've done.
The things are done. When Partners have chosen, the
decisions that I've made over life and the speed and the
conviction of which they were done, And then the kind of like
lacks attention to it later on and just these huge amount, this
huge projects and huge throats that get started in the in the
world of kind of excitement and Hyper focus of these projects in
the earlier. So yeah, it's good to know these
things now and I'm excited about, you know, having kind of
being empowered with this knowledge.
Really this diagnosis. Yeah, that it is helping me.
It's also, you know, turning my world upside down because what I
thought was again is is now a lot of thing.
But also anything that I blamed myself for I now can I blame it
on the ADHD, huh? Well I'm really interested to
talk to you more about this because well, so for context I'm
also neuro-diverse, I got my diagnosis long time ago and so I
used the term neuro-diverse because I don't think that the
specific diagnosis is actually, it's not words that we would use
these days. The terminologies have changed.
So at the time it was high-functioning.
Asperger's is that the name of the diagnosis that they gave me
but they wouldn't use time like that.
Now, it's not very Inclusive and they don't even use a Spurgeon
anymore. They would just call it autism.
But anyway, so when I just for context, because I'm kind of
coming at this also from a neurodiverse, protective, I find
it really interesting and as I mentioned that this season is
all about inclusivity in the music industry, and it's, that
means in all different ways including neuro diversity.
So, can you take me back to before the diagnosis?
What was it that made you decide to go down that road and maybe
explore whether this This is something that applies to you.
Well, as is typical. I kind of always felt there was
something that didn't quite add up, but it's really hard to
explain what it was. There are few things that I just
kind of put down to just being bad at things like time key.
For example, the time being is the worst one but also a kind of
strange thing that I noticed early on and I actually wrote a
song about it called feeling strange, not my vessel but it
was a point where I was really thinking an In version of this.
And the only way I can describe it is that I feel out of time.
I feel like there's a space between where my head is and
where the rest of everyone else's time is, and it often
makes it hard to engage in the moment because you're kind of
working hard to feel like you're really there.
And so, sometimes it really spun me out.
And I felt very disengaged distant from within, and that,
and I think when things get as they do very, very frenetic.
And busy because of the way, my mind kind of diverse from one
thing to another and set things off these.
Flurries yeah, I kind of found myself feeling very displaced
and going to have time so it wasn't until yeah.
Actually, I because I am taking, I'm trying out drugs and it's
really curious because I did spend a lot of time a lot of
time by myself and I have done a whole life, you know, and I
realize that basically I go from these extremes about being
highly social life and soul of the party.
Enough to spend and like, host parties.
I love that that same time. I'm also very interested and I'm
actually most of the time I'm hosting a party so that I don't
have to talk to anyone just so I can like, flowing around and you
know, Buzz about and kind of make things nicer people and
have an excuse to not talk to them.
Because I do find it hard to talk about the day-to-day and
what goes on the road. I just don't care plan, keep
track of what's going on, but I love to talk about that deep
things, and feelings, and experiences.
And Things that we might be shameful about.
I love talking about all that stuff.
So yeah, I had this feeling earlier on and I haven't even
have like memories of. I was actually talk to my dad
about the other day. They would go on holiday.
I didn't used to come home very often but we better like three
or four holidays and because I wasn't by my piano.
I now realize that my piano is the thing that makes me feel
scented. It's the bits that it's always
been a place where I would go to rest to kind of feel.
Varying connect with time Feelin, the flow and feel very
full and kind of grounded and and there's a few other things
that helped me do that unless exercise 6 and yeah just like
being very interested in something when it is that and
then we go after me. You got off my brain gets
excited but music and the improvisation side has always
been a very like my home space. So when I would go away and he's
on some holidays with my family There was like, desperate need
to find a piano. Like, I felt like I couldn't
breathe without it and I would just feel so mixed up and just
kind of torn apart and not really just didn't feel like me
and I needed to find these kinds of sometimes we'd like traipse
through a market in some, I don't know but like Poland or
something where we were and just trying to find the piano and
then I would sit there for like a couple of hours and just be
like and then I would feel sent it again, just like this little
checkpoint. And it's doing goddamn that I
also realized how much I needed that especially because lockdown
was like terrible for me just not being able to have any
freedom to go off and do my crazy thing and I have a child
daughter and as also kind of when it really triggered it was
childbirth because that was the first time in my life, really?
I mean, I've been so lucky to have a thing that has empowered
me and about ADHD. If that's all I knew it
obviously has kind of you know, really giving me an opportunity
because I Can super hyper, hyper focus and stick to one thing and
like, you know, be awake for 72 hours and just finish your thing
and just have all these strands and again because of the
attention diverting between things, it means I can do a
Baseline and then I can go to the drums and I can do the
engineering and then I can do this and I'm pretty somebody
then I could go for a jog and I'm totally happy in that space
of like one thing to the next to the next.
The next, if it's kind of connected it's just that the
mundane things that I really struggled with.
But if I'm on my own, making my music That's not a like things
like getting dressed my whole life, I just found it so hard
like this. So just horrifying feeling in
the morning. But oh my God, I got to get
dressed. God, what am I going to do?
How am I gonna do? What am I gonna wear?
And I'd make such a thing out of it.
I just tried to find mechanisms in my even in my teenage years
it was great man. Has come to enforce.
It's like yeah, that's good, it's giving it wrong, don't
worry about that. But the minute I, you know, I
went to boarding school and then I kind of had to wear my own
clothes after school. It's like I don't know what to
do. So I just chose black because I
was like, okay, I'm black or then.
I was like, no, I'm white. And I went all white and the
whole dining hall wants turned around and gasp tapping.
Sounds only white wonder, I just find these things.
These tiny decisions, so hard to make.
So, yeah, I just look back at my life now and kind of go.
Okay, that makes sense. And even relationships, you do
realize I get hyper focus on people that in mistaking, it for
or allowing love to come in or whatever it might be.
But yes, just so so So grateful to know that.
So, yeah, I'm taking these drugs so that the thing about it is
now, I feel I don't have that delay, like, I feel like I'm
talking to you now or anytime today.
I felt truly like in the moment, I haven't, I feel as if I guess
people feel, I don't know, not in any case, but I don't have
this sense of I'm like, always like your head and everything
else to slightly behind or that I'm not really there.
Yeah. So that's a nice feeling because
that is that was 24/7, that kind of Of like, trying to Center
Center be sent. So, that's a really nice and I
just, yeah, much going back to using on myself now.
And, and I've started to create mechanisms to basically
structure in my day because I've never ever had any structure
ever. And I'd always set these huge
tasks, like, particular, Financial life, impossible, to
Cask, like, let's reinvent the music ecosystem.
That's one task orders, do that, I did that.
Oh, let's just like make this Just roll music making system
because do that. And off, we go these huge things
and then always leaving the most important things to the very,
very, very last thing and the procrastinations just like, so
defeating the time now kind of? Yeah, I've read some stuff.
I'm trying to create things to make it easier and setting
myself up for ruining the day. Now to seems I've dropped off my
daughter, I go and have the run or do you just a walk or
something? That's like, like a nice thing,
but I feel my body's kind of moved and then I have some good
stuff here where it will be. And she's basically here to make
sure that I go down into the studio.
And I do a thing for an hour which is music focused.
And then, you know, have multiple meetings, all these
other companies that have started up over the years to do
music technique and Technology ID systems, whether it might be
adopting an AI. So yeah, it's been helpful and
I'm and I'm doing it bit by bit but I feel very grateful because
I was Any already lost myself. I couldn't find.
I couldn't find myself over there.
Any plans involved here? And yeah, I couldn't find myself
as a mom. Yeah, probably really hard
because I had to, because I happen to adore my daughter, and
I just have so much fun with her, but I've struggled.
I basically hyper-focus on her, you know, for many years and
only did what was absolutely necessary if a music.
So, Ali Monday. So, I did, I did a commission
every year reporting that a significant amount of cash by
got lucky or something would happen.
There would always be some outlier think that maybe Ariana
Grande cover of a song or, you know, Jason to reload as a song
on my son's or whatever it might be, that's always happens.
Right. My life tightly.
But music career since I was about 28, that started to
happen. So, yeah, I have found it very
hard and I also got a bit ill. I had have this thing called
Hashimoto's, which is kind of not really there.
Now, Actually what it is. That's what it.
What am I eating? Is a bit strange, but I was
just, like, ridiculously tired and yeah, can keep awake.
It was really getting in the way of my day.
I was like I was like kind of narcolepsy like just like if I
could live literally sat down for what half a second on a
slightly comfortable thing, I would just fall asleep and I was
like, I had extreme jet lag and I was like pushed into the sofa
could pick up So eventually. Yeah, it's kind of Miss
diagnosed with depression. Took some pills for that.
It was really not down. Kind of, yeah.
Strang up in a, just a total mess talking to the doctor kind
of held it together. And then I was like, so imagine
how are you? And I was like, there's a
slight, let it all out and it's just that clearly very stressed.
And I was very surprised how they diagnosed over the phone,
but I guess they saw like over the years.
I've kind of inquired about it but I've never gone through with
it. And yeah, it was I really
struggled with her to take them or not the depression things the
integrated but it did help me get through a patch.
And then I suppose, the big thing that happened was, I went
to Edinburgh for a the Edinburgh Fringe because a friend, slow my
position beatboxing. And improvising guy had this
one-man show either way. He's using my our company
gloves. These gloves, he wore a pet and
he's divides devised this show with the gloves for.
He's like, take his voice and like set our samples.
And the words can see, I didn't know what it was about, and it
was about his journey as a mostly single dad.
Add having to come from. Same as me, it's like do what
you like, but I don't go do these crazy things and then you
have a child in your life and you can't do anything ever again
the same way and because we've had no structure and never had
to really get anything else. First we do it was and that's
the same for short every parent out there.
But to kind of the things that we need to do are always the
last things that we do. We can't some people just
without go to that, they ought to do that.
And off we go. I think it's like, I've got.
Okay, go do that thing. I'll do that later.
Yeah. And then I could pletely, forget
about it and that's really not good.
If you have child who needs like feeling and mappings and like,
really basic things that if you just haven't thought about the
fact that you haven't got enough nappies.
That's quite distressing if you're in the middle of nowhere
with no one to help you. So yeah, it was not a fun times
anyway, so he had this diagnosis because in his play he talks
about near, you know, basically about commit suicide and then
His next door neighbor, kind of knocks on the door just at the
point where he's actually going to go and do anything.
And yeah and he didn't know, but that's what's going to happen.
But so I don't like doing the door so I can commit suicide and
it's kind of like thankfully decided to answer the door and
and yeah, and then had this conversation.
This guy was led to him being diagnosed ADHD.
So after the show I was like, wow, that was a really Brave
peace. Thank you for this amazing.
But I still didn't kind of like I didn't associate myself with
the person of the struggles that he was having.
I just kind of understood from the point of yak see, we're
having a child as a musician as part.
There's no support. We don't get in, like, child
support targets. What like they artists dancers.
Anyone like us do and so when one self-employed goes into law.
So yeah. Anyway he was struggling and
then I think he got this diagnosis and then he got help,
you know, he got some, got some power, we got some drugs and he
was like, I want you to all of his friends are kind of said.
Thank you. Well, Darlin, you know, bought
some stuff from him. Never say, with my friend
diarrhea and I was like, wow, that was so brave.
I don't was really cool. There's like, you know that
you're, you know, that you already oedema and I thought it.
No, come on, as I seen you over the years.
I know we have so much similarity in the were in the
process of what we do and and I really think you should check it
out and I was that okay? Like, I didn't think I really
didn't think anything of it and I immediately forgot kind of
went went home with that Bob. You know, some people have said
to me that, you know, my best friend back to your best
friend's of said, you know, you probably should get an Autism
diagnosis codes. You, you definitely are.
And I'm like, hey, be either on Monday.
Perhaps, I'm not really fast either way at the moment.
But then the thing which kind of, I kind of remember who it
was but I was I think I was in the playground being buy like
frumpy from be self before this happened and and somebody said,
hey, you should be this book and it was called better late than
never. Never and it's a diagnosis,
middle-aged women. Same age as me with the child
and the child was game, Daniel ADHD testing whether which,
obviously the mom was like, huh? And then it kind of led to her
dragons, but all the things she read.
I'll, I never read books. I got obviously.
So I got a lot of books. I love the food.
I love the look of them. I like them, but I just can't
read them. And I've read so many starts of
books and just can't, ya can't keep going.
But there have been a few in my life that have really focused
on. And this is one of them, and I
just did. In a bar and I was like, I'm
going to go. We expect do my second favorite
was this to people rather than you about something so good.
We're gonna follow up and that's when I actually learned what I
get to do, what I don't really know what it works and then
yeah, as I was reading it, all the things about her childhood
and how much you got in trouble and the kind of, like, just that
constantly playing up very promiscuous as a young girl,
getting up to the no-good or like inviting in danger, just
because it was exciting taking drugs.
Like I'm not being affected at all in the same way that my
friends were just like, kind of feeling a bit car whenever
there's going to be a little. And I just, yeah, I have always
had things and I was like, wow, that all is exactly a lot of
that is so much like I was and I never bake that for.
So then, yeah. Then I thought, okay.
So I'll show me for eating. He was a person who but God
willing when I went to him and it's all been a bit.
Wow, really. So I started taking Instructs.
The concerto and they are whittling and I'm thinking but
the moment I think it's them into a negative 5/4 times.
Ankle which is 76 78. Is it something else?
And I'm still not like totally comfortable with it but it's
helping me prepare my space. Where plan is Not to be on these
dogs forever. I have made good decisions.
I'm finding words coming much better ideas, forming memory
being better and finding. I mean I love to think in
systems and I've always loved that and I think yeah again it's
just like being able to reach in there like they're basically is
extra space in my head. That's what it feels like before
these drugs. My head was always buzzing and
it just totally like do Ejected tangential thoughts.
When I always have to come back and I still don't nap.
Since you asked me a question about 20 minutes ago and I'm
still your family but worse than this and I wouldn't follow
through thoughts and I feel like I am but I'm kind of connecting
and then I sort of got any other languages, I think it.
Yeah so the space in the head is has been really amazing and with
that space. I've been able to take a bit
more of a bigger view on things and see patterns and see where
actually I didn't need help with some of the team and where I
needed. Add them or so.
Actually, for the first time in my life hired, an engineer to
like, help me in the studio. I mean, I've had a Lexi who
would like, you know, when I had this other Studio bit further
out, you know, we prepare session so many things, but I've
I've never had somebody full-time.
Was awful times actually, Monday Tuesday, Wednesday, just to
like, be around to select fix stuff.
Do stuff. And it's just amazing.
It's like, but I've got helping everything I've got, like four
p8, they do all the other stuff, but when it comes to the things
that are really important to me, I don't know.
Of the and I think it's because I feel no, I've got to do that.
You know, I've got to suffer the updates and the spinny ball.
That's my Penance for doing the fun stuff.
But actually what happens is, the minute has been a ball comes
up. I just thought distracted off.
I go and do something else and I don't fulfill that task.
So that's been good and I have never structures.
So I yeah, I do my music and then I have these wonderful from
130. I'm trying to, you know, I have
these like, Open Spaces where I can chat to people and then,
Well, she says, if anti-gun work with school choir, well then I
got a bunch of kids. We were supposed to be doing
choir but then I realize it that's not really possible to
learn the songs of the tiny amount of time.
They give me. So in our writing or something
said about the school to try and raise money for the school roof.
Yeah. So anyway, I think I'm trying to
create a structure and it's been very helpful as well because
yeah, my the father of my child you're on the number.
We also read the book that I was like, look this really explain.
Quite a lot of why I was so impossible and why I just
couldn't do certain things that you felt, I should have easily
been able to do and also why I like insanely irritating when
I'm older than I did. And I just won't shut up about
it and just want desperately to work on that through the days.
And so the point where I had no sleep and so it's very
enlightening. Very helpful.
And even, you know the other day even though my best friend like
lazy, she, you know, she totally accept it.
She knows it. She's also the one that's like
to get dirty. Thought it is G.
Also just like my mom actually just stuff in the bin in the
news about the most likely source of ADHD people brought
him off it and I have a bunch of friends who also have been
likely to be diagnosed. So there is a suspicion to me
like it is all in my head, you know?
Is it one of my head? Like I said, no.
Have you seen this in heels? And I felt like they were doing
it. So see you could not be and I
like no I don't destroy my world.
Again I've just started to make sense of my life and it does
make sense and I believe it. So I really thought of like it's
quite a different party woman. My mom'll make see and kind of
sends me these things like some like arcing so you're doubting
it or I definitely owe. You just sharing it because I'm
happy. Interested and it's just yeah.
But that just happened the other day and I was the first time
I've been like, oh, okay, maybe this is all in my head and, you
know, so yeah, early days. Yeah, I think it's, I mean,
there's so much. I just want to say thank you so
much for sharing and being vulnerable and talking about
your story, because I'm sure they'll be people listening.
And I was, you can't see me when people listening to us, but I'm
nodding along furiously because so much of what you said is a
complete mirror of my life experience as well.
And I'm sure Able to sing to this will have this as well.
People find it. So strange that like I'm a
high-functioning person. I do all these different
projects but I can't get dressed.
I'm currently not dressed. Yeah, I'd like that.
Yeah it's actually people my friends say to me like you're
the most dysfunctional high functioning person.
I know because you can do all these mad projects and really
high exciting things. But I forget to eat and you
know, do find it really hard to do the daily tasks and things
that people People and sometimes you feel like a bit of an alien
in this world where it's like how come everybody else knows
how to do small talk and like knows how to get dressed in and
it's Phil. So all of that was just so
resonant and so I'm really grateful that you shared it.
Just give a chance for the actual book because it wasn't
actually that book that I asked Mike to be.
There was a, it was a book called Dirty Laundry and it's
just come out and it's these two bloggers.
One of them, you know, kind of struggle for many years and went
to many different jobs than just couldn't hold it down because
But then found a space in some, what did?
So she's. But anyway, they wrote this
blog, they started doing this blog because it's funny.
Actually, I just with you tell you how they found out is the so
like many the basic new the the guy rolled around to his
girlfriend's. They don't babe, if you've got
something to do, come in the name of it but it's like
something to do with like a tampon but like a handmade
tampon and all I got handmade pad.
He's like but basically I don't know if you'll like this book
whenever I found my period. I'm like, oh wow, I just come
on. I
was just I had to go to the toilets and Try and wash it out.
It was a tremendous. There's like that slip stream at
the site, completely oblivious to that have thing.
That happens every single day, every single month since I was
like 12. Yeah.
You think we'd get the memo by now but yeah I know exactly what
you mean by the time we just got around to figuring out and
probably going to stop anyway. I guess know.
So that's how they discovered. It was like Hey baby but you
know are you are you are you wearing a real tampon or one or
one that or have you forgotten something?
I have you forgot to change your tampon something because it's
just like Like so many times they just been like, oh my god.
I've been wet for quite a while actually now I don't do that.
Makes you happy. So things too much.
Do you don't have these Cups than cups which is great
because. Yeah, yeah.
I'ma say I went, I go with period pants because better for
the environment and you can't forget about it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think things like nobody told
me about this. These coupling, though, it does
take a while to get used to. But so, feel so good.
Not to be like, landfilling. You know, it's just how is that
not a thing that people get here about it?
And that literally I was certified and something toggle
know if they're C8. So someone talking about thank
you Justin. So anyway, yeah and so that's
when they realized that. Yeah because she's I think she's
just been diagnosed ADHD and that was a very ADHD thing to do
and so in the middle of the night she was like oh my God!
We've got a, we've got to like set up an Instagram.
We got to tell people that this is what they need to know this
you know about The I can't remember the name of it.
There's a kind of made-up humankind thing that they made,
anyway, and that's how they started their blog and then just
got like, millions of views and I started following them
tonight. They came up with all these
great terms for things. Like, you know, what happens
when you go to a hotel or you go home and you got the most tiny
bedroom because some nice persons congregate or you just
managed to tell you in some other type of focus time and
then the minute you like trying to get dressed in the morning.
The whole floor is covered in every possible thing and it
stays there for a very long time.
And that they called it the floor drug.
And that's like, yeah. Thought.
Oh it's good. Another one was like, oh, they
got so many good terms anyway. It's they've got like a
glossary. I love it.
I love it because it also just makes like it's just that
feeling of. Like I'm not a complete alien.
There was actually quite a lot of us then operate this way and
I feel like that's for me because the thing about getting
a diagnosis is not that it's just like oh there's a Label
that I can use now but also that it helps you.
Let yourself off the hook a little bit and be like, this is
an actual thing. These are some of the traits
that I clearly display and I can let myself off the hook a bit.
And then also like you said strategize around like okay.
What can I what do I really need to get better at in order to
like live a fulfilling operational life other things
I'm like, get it doesn't bother me that.
I don't get dressed. I don't care about that.
Like, but obviously, I need to find a way to make sure that Say
it's a nice example here is my food but just yeah, it's it's
been there for a while. Yeah.
Anyway, so it's I'm, I'm lucky. I'm lucky that I have had
diagnosis. I'm really lucky that in my
life. I've had manifested a job that
perfectly suits my condition, but, you know, I know people who
obviously haven't had diagnosis or they have and they haven't
had that luxury. Both of, you know, having the
space to allow your hope Focus to be that your kind of secret
super weapon secret. Yes.
Super tool over the movements and put super super super powers
could harness it. Yeah, but I wasn't aware that I
was harnessing it, but I have now but it also kind of makes me
think you know are hyper focus on music because it was
something that gave me this feeling but I also you know,
hyper focused on Art and Other things that I was younger, but
this was the thing that stuck and I'm very grateful that it
did. But I do Wonder, like if I went
to a school that didn't have a piano, you know, or I wasn't
lucky like that. And the, the school that I went
to sell that I had this weird covered with a Atari computer in
it and I really hyper focus in kind of learned how to program
from the age of 12 like music on this thing and if I hadn't had
those opportunities, you know, I can't.
I just put fail miserably if I tried to do that.
A thing which cool sets you up for, which is like, go do these
things are these things, memorize these things do this
two tests. Go do this thing in a structured
day, which is a possible. And then, you know, and then go
get a job or go to university. And, yeah, it just, it feels.
It feels like, I don't know. I just hope that they realize
that there are way more new. I diverse people.
Then there are diagnosed and that it's really, really, super
common and that there Amazing things that you can do.
If you do have these buttons and you're supported in that way.
And yeah, I just, I see scalp going to school.
And, you know, that's part of the reason why I'm going to
today, it's just to kind of breathe a little kind of
spontaneity and fun, and improvisation, and space.
There's not sat down as also. I don't want to learn songs with
them because I'm like, it's just like anyone could do that.
Let's do something wild and crazy and it's really fun.
Um, and I can immediately tell, you know, the new diverse kids
come forth and being really good as I'm writing.
So yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I love what I Love Ken
Robinson like he's dead now but you know what, he talked about
education and creativity to encourage the passions in kids
and I think yeah you know you were diverse kids really
struggle with the system especially in as a result as a
result. The whole of humanity was not
benefiting from our like weird but can have skills that could
Good. If we were supporting the right
way. Just as you know typical
atypical not you know that what's that?
What's the other frame there? A typical.
I think it's really interesting that you said you had lots of
friends who had also been diagnosed because I thought
Frasier's. I was like, I don't know.
Any neurotypical, people maybe they don't actually exist but
one of my friends, she's actually a neurodiversity
expert. That's her job and does research
in all of it and she was like, no, no, no, these People exist.
It's just that you connect with like-minded people.
And so actually probably everyone in your circle is a bit
on the neuro-diverse side. Something the door.
Yeah, I know it because like I said, sometimes you can have
effects on people. You can be really, super intense
I can talk about copyright for four hours and the other person
if they're also like that way inclined, they're just laughing
it up. Whereas I think neurotypical
people just like run away from me.
In the other people to spit. Yeah.
And I think also because it's that this other thing I learned
about from reading this book, do story was about object,
constancy that I've really experienced my whole life is
that I don't tend to miss people.
As long as I don't love them or you know that do adore them, I
just don't miss people like the minute they've gone away for me.
I'm like doodoo brains over here.
You know I love my daughter. I mean, yes, sometimes I will
miss her but most of the time I find out, she's Happy.
I'm just like I'm so like great about that and I'm gonna make
you a lot coats are. But I feel like in my life, you
know, my friend, the friend who stuck around other ones, who
don't need you to be there all the time or the don't want to
kind of like o to do this. And I bought this thing at the
jobsite. Oh my God.
Have you seen this new thing on the Telly?
I'm like no don't no. Don't want to know too much
information. Thank you.
But if they're like, I need to talk to you about this new thing
that I've did it together. Not come to my world.
So yeah. So it is those people that are
the surgery. I mean, the arouse.
I've had with Partners where they're like, you didn't text me
for 3 days. I'm like, I forgot you existed.
Yeah, no. And it's like, it's like, no, it
doesn't. It's not aged connected to how I
feel about that person but I'm when you're hyper focused on
something else which is tends to be you.
Just switch between one thing and the other and you're just
like, yeah, I just didn't even I was just it's so here that I
knew were over there gone. I'd forgotten you were a thing
to be honest. But it's I think this is the
whole thing is you it's all about communication as well.
Like now I understand more about how I operate.
I think if people in your life you can explain to them that you
said getting someone else to read that book and being like
this kind of explains was a bit like this and this will help you
interact with me in a less kind of friction way because you can
understand how my brain is functioning in this situation.
So maybe like don't take it so personally that I forgot you
existed. Did in that moment.
That's quite extreme example. But you know what I mean?
And it's, I think for me, it's been helpful to be able to learn
more about it in order to communicate with people.
Although I do typically tend to connect with people who sort of
get it anyway. But I agree with the thing, we
said about school, like, I was in trouble at school, all of the
time and they just didn't understand it.
Because they were like, she seems like a bright kid, but
like she's such a pain in the ass and like, you know, I was
always into tension or and I wouldn't go to school.
A couldn't even keep up with like the schedule and the
timetable. I would just run on my own time.
And so they were always like threatening to kick me out and
stuff like this. But it'd be, you know, in the
end, it worked out. Okay.
But it was real, I really hated school which is a shame because
of the structures and the rules and the stuff that I just
couldn't understand but I do hope that in general Society is
learning more about neuro diversity.
And how to better kind of like accommodate different people's
needs to because like you said, I love the way talk about it.
So positively That it's like, it can be a superpower, there's so
much amazing stuff that you can do if it's supported and and
you've got the right kind of support network and and
strategies in place that, you know, we can do amazing things.
I just can't necessarily do the things that neurotypical people
can do, but it goes both ways. Neurotypical, people cannot
focus on something for 72 hours without sleeping more blinking.
But, yeah. And they're all different
awesome. Major benefits to not doing
that. You staying well you don't get
tired. I get like eventually weird and
able to be there for your family.
So yeah it's a I don't know how long it's going to last but you
know I imagine in my head and was checking in The New Zoo but
I feel like within a year or a year from now and I've been on
the inside or something wrong. Just I think I just got back and
that was and then a bit. I don't remember.
It was either because I also have no concept of time.
Yeah. That was yeah, I sort of just
getting to swing that and very helpful and I hope that in a
year from now that I will have a structure and things will be a
lot more simple than that was crazy because if these
structures and then I would like to not feeling it.
Yeah, well, thank you so much for sharing your story.
It's been really interesting and as I said, Resident cat and I
just take a moment to let you share with our listeners.
Listeners something that you're working on at the Minotaur
recently that they might go and explore.
I'll put links to things like dive will put a link to the book
so I'm sure people go and look it up now but links to things
that you're doing that people can look look out for well.
I've got lots of things in the works.
One of them is a reading amazing.
He's actually so excited about it's 15 minutes long.
It's like a journey for the last two years and I really don't
want to talk about it but um it's called what anything to me.
And it's got these three stages to it that I like them
progression. I kind of it's a power is a
power battle I suppose between myself and another in a sexual
way or in a kind of allowing not allowing somebody to drive you
to call you, to wish you to what that means like a question of
identity. So it's also it also mirrors, a
lot of Journey and thoughts about AI as I do.
That my own name legit, but it's also originally started as a
power play comedian some thing. But, interesting, the person
that I voted about is also the one kind of introduced me to
generative art forms Network 22 years ago.
So it's all kind of interconnectivity and very, very
strands main strands. And now doing video, they will
get this as if you want. But I'm doing, I'm trying to
pull together all this Redstone like the Creator passport.
My own In those that you'll be able to use ability and sing a
song with my voice but probably Advocate possible.
The kind of question of like it's owned by government.
But yeah, so that's one thing that's all coming up.
There's going to be another song which if I can get it together,
is going to be nonsensical language that I've connected
with another app called time. I was just having a nice chat
with her one bit. I chose Parables, she sounds a
bit like, having film as I was talking to her and we come up
with this. Nice language.
I'm going to kind of post the chat as the how I made the song
and then I have asked most often with the should be up to sing it
with me and so she's doing scene of it as an agency.
We didn't seem to it with a short moving its but it'd be the
first time people hear that boys and I want to put it as a so
what was that? It'll be the first time a i Mojo
is on Spotify and the idea being that over time scale and I might
sing that song and In folks that come different online, different
functionalities or different range or different time.
But who needs bethadone room? But yeah, I mean, any Inspire
Inspire inspiration like, as to how sweet really well is Holly
Hunter and Hunted. Plus she's amazing to live with
that drivers tongue they'll be home.
And so and also everything sort of school for.
I got to the net and I have to go because I'm doing that.
It's nice. It's actually hanging.
Thank you so much. Really appreciate your time.
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