Why did the duck trip on the sidewalk?
He tripped on a quack. How can you tell the difference
between a dog and a tree by the bark dog.
Dogs can't operate MRI. Can't.
What did the car say to its tires?
Thanks for keeping it wheel. He needs more water in his
mouth. Feel like that counts.
He just swallowed them. What kind of class?
Why? How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it. A guy threw a gallon of milk on
my head. How dare he?
That was a stupid one. What kind of car would Jesus
drive? A Chrysler?
You can't swallow it. Thank you, champion.
Thank you so much. Yeah, no sense of humor.
Oh, crossing family recently in Dallas, TX, they opened up the
husband's store. Women who were frustrated with
online dating and blind dates just wanted a place where they
could just cut to the chase, find a man and take him home.
And so these girls got together. They drove down to Dallas, TX to
the husband's store. They got there.
The sign reads that there are six floors at this store and
each floor has different kinds of men.
But the only catch is once you leave a floor to go to an
additional floor, you can never go back down.
The ladies are so excited. They go inside, they see the the
door, the sign on the door to 1st floor and it just says these
men have jobs. Women were elated because they
were tired of being with guys who lived in the house with
their mom, played a bunch of video games and couldn't pay
their own bills. They're like, these men have
jobs, this will be great. They went in there, they looked
around like, I want to know what's on floor #2.
So they leave floor one, walk up the 16 stairs to floor #2 and
the sign on the door reads, these men have jobs and a strong
romantic streak. The ladies are like, finally,
I'm going to have somebody who will rub my feet, tell me I'm
beautiful, put flower petals all over the house.
They're like, if this is floor two, I got to know what's on
floor #3. So they leave floor #2.
They walk up the 16 stairs, the door close behind them to floor
#2. They find themselves at the door
to floor #3 and it says these men have jobs.
Jobs, a strong romantic streak, and they love kids.
These ladies, they're going now this is going to be wonderful.
They're looking around, they're like, this is great, but deep
down inside they're going, I wonder what's on floor #4 so
they go up to floor #4 these men have jobs.
These men have a strong romantic streak, they love kids, and they
enjoy helping around the house. Jehovah Jireh, this is
wonderful. They're going, this is great.
They're looking around, they're loving what they're seeing, but
then they're going, I got to know what's on floor #5 So they
let the door close behind them. On floor #4 They walk up the 16
stairs to floor #5 the sign on the door reads.
These men have jobs, a strong romantic streak, love kids,
enjoy helping around the house, and are incredibly handsome.
This is where we get the pastoral staff of the crossing
is from floor #5 and they're looking around and the sign was
not lying. These men were gorgeous and to
think they have jobs, a strong romantic streak like helping
around the house, and they love kids and these women were going
if. This is what is on floor five.
Can you imagine what is on floor number six?
So they let the door close behind them on floor #5 They
walked up the 16 steps to floor number six and the sign on the
door reads. Your visitor 3,126,853 to this
floor. There are no men on this floor.
This floor exists to prove that women are impossible to please.
Happy Father's Day. You're a survivor.
In an effort to make sure that they didn't get any
discrimination suits filed against them.
The owners eventually opened up the wife store with the same
rules. The guys went to floor #1.
The sign on the door reads. These women like to cook.
The sign on floor #2 says these women like to cook and have sex.
There has never been a visitor to floor number 34.
Five. Oh man.
If you didn't like that joke, you're not going to like it
here, because that's funny. That maybe is why there's a huge
difference on consumer spending when it comes to Mother's Day
and Father's Day. On Mother's Day, we spend $25
billion to say thanks, and on Father's Day, $15 billion.
There is a $10 billion gap. I.
Want to welcome those of you joining at all of our locations,
those of you watching online and inside, and those of you who are
joining us for the first time or the first time in a long time.
And my goal today is very simple, that every single one of
us would take steps to grow in an intimate personal
relationship with Jesus Christ. And one of the ways that you
could grow, what you're going to hear more about later at the end
of the service is if you are a man, one of the ways that you
could grow is by going to our uncommon conference.
It's going to be an opportunity for you to have fun, have some
food, and to grow in your faith. And it might be a great gift for
the man in your life to buy them a ticket to our men's conference
this Father's Day. Now when it comes to men in
God's desire. Men are not just critical to the
creation of children, but in the spiritual development of those
children. The reason I say that is because
culture today continues to reduce the importance and the
necessity of fathers. Of having a man in the home and
at the same time counseling centers cannot be open fast
enough to deal with the father wounds that so many people are
navigating pastoral staff across the country are having to
constantly help people create an.
Appropriate view of their heavenly Father because of the
baggage care are that caused by their earthly father.
And looking into the future, there is a problem on the
horizon because church attendance is between 60 and 70%
women, which means that the church is doing a pretty decent
job of reaching the women in their communities, but not so
good of a job of reaching the men in their communities.
Why does this matter? We've talked about this
statistic before that when a kid comes to faith in Christ, 3.5%
of the time the rest of the family follows.
When a kid finds a relationship with Jesus, 3 1/2% of the time
the rest of the family comes to faith.
When a woman comes to Christ, this is wonderful news.
It's 17%. That means that 17% of the time
when a woman comes to faith, the rest of the family will follow.
Why are men so critical to reaching our communities to
accomplish in the Great Commission is because when a man
comes to faith, 93% of the time the rest of the family will
follow. Now ladies, this does not mean
that you do not carry an important role in the home.
I'm just telling you how what the statistics show.
In fact, ladies, we've talked about this before as well, that
while your husband is the one who primarily picks out the
spiritual direction of the home, the mother is the one who
develops the spiritual quality of the home.
In fact, teenagers cite that the person that they're going to go
to the most, learn from the most about spiritual matters is the
mom. So men, you pick the spiritual
direction. Ladies, you're responsible for
the spiritual quality. Let me give a little devotional
thought to those of you who are single.
Who you pick to marry will determine the level of
spirituality in your home. So ladies, if you find a guy,
make sure you find a guy who loves Jesus because your family
will 93% of the time follow his spiritual direction.
Man, when you're getting ready to pick a someone to marry, your
kids are going to most likely learn their faith from their
mother. So make sure you pick somebody
who has a great faith. I've seen this happen all too
often. You have young people who love
the Lord and then they start finding somebody else to love as
well. And the person that they love
doesn't necessarily love Jesus there, you know, she loves the
Lord and all of a sudden she meets Ted.
Ted doesn't love the Lord, but he has a tan and a metabolism.
And so she's kind of like, this is wonderful.
But just because something is wonderful doesn't mean you
should take it home. Like some of you have ugly dogs
that you love. And some of you are even cat
owners. And it's OK to acknowledge that
God made it and that's, you know, great.
But just because God made it and it's great doesn't mean that you
should marry it or bring it into your home.
And what happens is you fall in love with somebody who hasn't
given their heart to God. And then you find yourself in a
spot that you didn't expect you'd be.
And you find yourself navigating the challenges and the hurts of
life. And you're going, where's God?
And what I would tell you is God is where he always has been.
He is in the business of blessing, obedience, and if you
step outside of God's of being obedient to God, you cannot
expect the blessings from God. Now, that is not to say that God
is not redemptive in an area of your life where you've made
mistakes or somebody else has made mistakes.
God is constantly in the redemptive business.
He loves to redeem sin, but what he loves more is blessing
obedience. And the problem is, and we are
part of the problem as a church is we love redemption stories,
don't we? People fall off the tracks.
People go all kinds of crazy. We're like, look at how awesome
God's redemptive work is. And we highlight and we make
little short videos about it. And we're all moved by it
because God loves to redeem sin and we love watching God redeem
sin. But what has happened is, is we
have over elevated the redemptive arc of God and we
have under elevated what happens when people are obedient to God
and experiencing the blessings that come from that obedience.
Parents, let me prove it to you. Which would you rather have
happen? Your kids go off the deep end,
make an absolute mess of their life, have to do all kinds of
trauma and all kinds of rehab, and God redeems them and puts
them back into a right relationship.
Or your kids have an incredibly boring testimony because they
got serious about God from a really young age, trusted God
and not just with their faith, but they also made Him the Lord
of their life and they were obedient to Him.
And God put His blessings on your kids out of obedience.
And their testimony was, I obeyed God in an early age and I
never regretted it. Every parent would rather have
this testimony than watching their kids go through the pain
and the horror of the redemptive ark.
God is good in both scenarios, and God does a wonderful job in
both lanes. But if we could choose, I would
tell you, avoid the heartache of the redemptive ark and just
learn to experience and enjoy the blessings that come from
obedience. Because one of the days you're
going to find yourself in a relationship with somebody,
you're going to find yourself in a marriage, you're going to find
yourself in parenting. Situations and you are going to
want to just live in the blessing that comes from
obedience. Now, some of you are going by
Clayton. My life is presently a wreck.
My family is blown up. Things are not going the way
they're supposed to be. So what am I supposed to do?
I want you to know if you find yourself in a spot today that is
not necessarily where you wanted to end up, you're in good
company. In fact, if you were to go
through scripture and try and find the family that you would
want to be of, be a part of in Scripture, you'd be hard pressed
to find one. It might be one of the hardest
things to have a godly marriage and to raise a godly family.
Why is this the case? Because you have a spiritual
enemy when it comes to your home.
Look what it says in John 1010. We talk about this all the time
the thief this is Satan comes only to steal, kill and destroy
I this is Jesus have come that they may have life and have it
to the full. This is God going I want to
bless your obedience. I want to redeem the sin but
let's make no mistake about it. You have an enemy.
You want a good marriage. Satan wants to destroy it.
You want to heal the brokenness in your family.
Satan wants it to to keep it from happening.
You want to break generational curses.
Satan wants to stop it in its tracks.
Satan takes no days off. You want to come clean to your
wife about something that you've been doing in your life.
Satan wants to you to keep you from doing it, and the moment
you try to make a move in the direction of God, Satan is there
trying to kill that move of God in your life.
You've come to church hundreds of times and you felt the the
pull that you're supposed to make a response or supposed to
make a decision. And from the moment you make the
decision that you want to do it until you're actually getting
around doing it, you never actually got around to doing it
because Satan stole it from the path he came in and he
intercepted the move that you were trying to make.
You have a spiritual enemy and he takes no days off.
For instance, fellas, you guys, you know, here in our part of
the world, we love guns rights. And we have concealed carry
permits. And we've got a gun in the truck
that we forgot that we had in there.
And we've got a gun behind the safe.
And if someone breaks into our house, they got another thing
coming. And when a guy comes and tries
to date my daughter, I'll be cleaning my shotguns on the
front porch. And we're super jazzed about it.
But if you were to ask, like most people, they don't know
somebody who's ever had anybody break into their house.
What that means is, is that we are overqualified for an an
event that will not occur for an enemy that will probably not
show up. And we are under qualified for
an enemy that is already in our home because you and I have a
spiritual enemy who tries to steal, kill and destroy your
marriage, your parenting, and the obedience that God wants you
to experience. More important than whether or
not is your house locked up is is your heart locked up.
Take another step forward is you and I, we are under qualified to
deal with the spiritual realities of this war.
You and I have an enemy. And it's not just spiritual.
There's other enemies too. And Satan knows just how
powerful a God honoring family can be.
Let me show you how fast he attacks it.
And Genesis one, God creates man.
In Genesis 2, he creates woman. And now we have a family in
Genesis three. They sin.
In Genesis 4, the oldest son kills the youngest son.
Satan attacks that fast because he knows what how powerful a God
honoring family can be. So he wages war against us.
And it's not just a spiritual war that he wages against us.
There is our fleshly war as well.
Look at what it says in Romans Chapter 7.
I do not understand what I want to do.
For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate to do.
For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it
out. For I do not do the good I want
to do, but the evil I did not want to do.
This I keep on doing so. I find this law at work.
Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.
Some of you, you're at church last weekend and you go, OK,
this weekend or this week, I'm not going to cuss.
And sure enough, you scare cussed twice.
And one of those scare cusses wasn't a scare cuss, it was a
real cuss. And you haven't asked for
forgiveness for it. You have the good that you're
going. You know what?
I'm not going to do this bad thing anymore.
I want to do good and yet you did the opposite.
So you this week, you're like this week, I'm not going to lose
my anger. I'm not going to lose my cool.
I'm not going to get all crazy in the house.
And sure enough, that is exactly what you did.
Sometimes we're going, this is the bad stuff.
I don't want to do it and we end up doing all the bad stuff.
And sometimes we're going, you know what, I'm going to do a
good thing this week. I'm going to spend time on my
word. I'm going to spend time doing
the things of God and we never get around to doing the good.
That we actually wanted to do. You and I have an enemy.
Now, on top of that, we don't have a strategy for the
spiritual enemy or for the enemy of our flesh.
And so we are kind of accidentally going through life.
When it comes to our marriage, we're accidentally marriaging.
When it comes to our parenting, we're accidentally parenting.
And I've never heard anybody talk about an accident as a good
thing. Like, I got in an accident
today. Oh, praise God.
That sounds wonderful. Yeah, it was a real blessing.
We're hoping to get for in another accident later today.
Nobody ever says that when we hear an accident like, oh,
that's so bad. I'm so sorry.
But most of us are accidentally involved in our marriage,
accidentally parenting, and then our kids turn out in a way that
we didn't want them to turn out because we didn't accidentally
parent them. And then you find people who
have pretty decent kids and you're like, how did you get the
pretty decent kids? Because we want to kind of run
your play and they're like, we really don't know because they
were accidentally parenting too. And then we just find ourselves
going from one accident to another accident and constantly
being in a position where God is having to redeem stuff and never
actually operating in a place where God blesses.
So how do you and I navigate this?
We need a better strategy, we need a better blueprint and I
think there is a great blueprint found in Ephesians chapter five.
I think if you were to take the New Testament from from Matthew.
All the way to Revelation and you were to like condense it
that Ephesians chapter 5 has like all the tools, tips and
tricks for you and I to be the people that God created us to
be. Let's take a look at it.
Ephesians 5. Follow God's example.
Therefore, as dearly loved children, most of us are
struggling in our marriage and in our parenting because we are
not following God's example. You can't follow God's example
if you don't know what God's example is.
And you wouldn't know what God's example is unless you're
spending time in His Word, being obedient to His Spirit, and
spending time with God's people. And so if you want to follow
God's example, you need to put yourself in a position to see
what God's example is and then have the courage and the
strength to walk it out. Let's keep going and walk in the
way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for
us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.
Fellas, I want to give you a little.
Pro tip here, you may have noticed that women really love
Jesus. They're huge fans of him.
And I would submit to you that the reason they're huge fans of
Jesus is because he sacrificed for them and he serves them.
And you might be going, you know, my wife, she's always
spending time wanting to learn more about Jesus and she listens
to whatever Jesus tells her to do.
And I really, I kind of want that I'd kind of like her to,
you know, listen to me every once in a while.
And what I would tell you is you trying to get her to sacrifice
for you and you trying to get her to serve you might not be
the best strategy that what might work better is you loving
your wife the way Christ loves us by serving and sacrificing.
Tough question. When was the last time you
served your spouse? When was the last time you
sacrificed for your spouse? When was the last time you did
something you hated because you loved her more?
Let's keep going, verse 3. But among you, there must not be
even on a hint of sexual immorality or any kind of
impurity or of greed, because these are improper for God's
holy people. This is not just for fellas
based off stats. This is an issue for women too.
Purity must be our priority. What you watch, what you log on
to, who you follow on social media, there must not even be a
hint of sexual impurity. Just so you guys know the.
More you engage in fake sex, the more it will impact real sex.
Studies show that people who abstain from any kind of sexual
impurity and say, you know what, that's just not going to be us.
Have a better, more healthy, more frequent sex life.
So if you want to destroy the sex that you actually want to
have with a real person, keep watching other people do what
they do and they get paid to do those things.
There is a better way. This is one of those areas where
God's going, trust me, my way's the best way.
Follow me and you'll experience greater blessing.
There should not even be a hint of impurity in us.
We should be above all of that. Second thing is greed must be
defeated. As Americans, we are some of the
wealthiest people in all of human history.
We have houses for our clothes, walk in closets.
We have houses for our cars, but we call them garages.
We have houses for our house and then we have second houses.
We have plenty and we will be like, I got to work so hard so
that way I can get my kids all the stuff they need.
Let me say this little side note.
First off, Christian should be the very best workers.
We should be so good at our jobs that secular institutions only
want to hire us that they're like, listen, we're, we're, we
got all these jobs open and we would, we just want a profile
that we just want the Christians because these people don't just
work for money. They don't just work for their
boss. It's as if they're working unto
the Lord. If you're going to get fired as
a Christian from your job, it should be because they violated
a spiritual principle, but it should not be because of bad
customer service and poor work ethic.
We should be the best. However, some of us are
overworked and over committed, not because we are, you know,
just serious about our faith, but because we just want to keep
buying our stuffs our our kids stuff.
And we did a survey here at our church and our kids told us that
your our spiritual provision is more important than our material
provision. Our kids actually said they
would rather have time with their dad than a new iPad.
They want you. Verse four.
Nor should there be any obscenity, foolish talker
course, joking, which are all out of place, but rather
Thanksgiving. This is important for men to
hear. Men, your words have power and
what you say gives permission in your home and you can use your
words to build your wife up or to tear down to build your
family up or to tear them down. You can use your words to push
people away from Jesus to tear down your reputation or you can
use your words to point people to Jesus.
Make sure you use your words to accomplish the things that Jesus
would want you to accomplish. Let's keep going for of this you
can be sure no immoral, impure or greedy person.
Such a person is an idolatry has any inheritance in the Kingdom
of Christ and of God. If you guys are running this
plot. Say when you're doing these
things, this is not OK for you, versus let's keep going.
Let no one deceive you with empty words.
For because of such things, God's wrath comes on those who
are disobedient. God loves to bless obedience,
but He will punish disobedience. Therefore do not be partners
with them. For you were once darkness, but
now you are light, and the Lord live as children of the light.
For the fruit of the light consists of all goodness,
righteousness, and truth. And find out what pleases the
Lord. You and I are supposed to be a
light on a hill, us or city on a hill, a light on a stand, so
that other people can see us and take notice of us from a
distance. They should notice the
difference. You and I are supposed to be
different than the people around us.
Because of our allegiance to Christ, let's keep going.
Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but
rather expose them. It is shameful even to mention
what the disobedient do in secret.
Keep going. But everything exposed by the
light becomes visible, and everything that is illuminated
becomes a light that is. This is why it is said, Wake up,
sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ.
Will shine on you. Do the things that God calls you
to do and He will shine on you. Let's keep going.
Be very careful then, how you live not as unwise, but as wise.
How do we do this? Making the most of every
opportunity. Why?
Because the days are evil. This could have been written
today. The days are evil.
You and I need to live as wise people, not as unwise people.
We need to make the most of every opportunity.
Let's keep going. Therefore, do not be foolish,
but understand what the Lord's will is.
If you were to ask what are the one of the top five questions
that pastors gets asked, it is what is God's will for my life?
So let me give you like the Cliff Notes version, we'll do a
bigger one at a later time. But if you want to know God's
will for your life, you learn God's will for your life by
spending time in his word, the Bible, spending time in prayer
with the Holy Spirit and spending time with God's people
and then finding where God is working and join him there.
If you want to know what God's will is for your life, that is
how you do it. And one of the ways you can
determine your spiritual maturity, charity in Christ, is
through your spiritual intimacy with Christ.
And when you are intimate with Christ, you know what it is that
He wants you to do. So if you're going, I'm having a
really hard time figuring out God's will for my life, that
might mean that you are deficient in spending time in
God's Word with His Spirit, with His people, and looking for
where He is working and joining him in that work.
Let's keep going. Do not get drunk on wine which
leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the
Spirit. So quick little devoke here, you
can drink, you just can't get drunk.
You should never be in a position where you can't drive
and clearly tell somebody the good news of Jesus Christ.
And if you can't tell somebody the good news of Jesus Christ, I
would tell you to spend less time drinking and more time
studying because a lot of times we get the courage to tell
people about Jesus when we're drunk and but we can't really
tell people what Jesus is like. So you should go to my church is
the best. And the crossing has grown leaps
and bounds on that strategy. But I want us to have a better
strategy. OK, So you should always be in a
position where you can do the work of the Lord.
So alcohol is a lot like a lot of other things in Scripture.
It is good in bounds, but if you operate outside of that bounds,
it can do all kinds of damage. Alcohol is something that you
can use, but if you use it in the wrong way, it can take you
down a really bad Rd. Sex is a good thing from God,
but if you do it in ways that you're not supposed to do it, it
can cause all kinds of damage. And what happens when you let
alcohol get out of its bounds? Well, it leads to all kinds of
debauchery and just a little another devo.
I've never met somebody who's like, you know what, Clayton?
And we just wanted to come in and give you a praise report.
Like, our marriage was really, really struggling.
And then we started drinking a lot.
And like, our marriage has never been better.
Like she's more beautiful than me today than ever.
OK, I've never had that testimony.
I've never heard people come up to me and go.
We are having a hard time managing our kids and we just
started drinking. Just lots and lots of that's
just never worked. In fact, a lot of people who
give themselves over to a bunch of drinking end up in places
that they never thought that they would be.
He's saying listen man, don't be drunk.
It leads places you don't want to go.
OK, next one, speaking the weather with psalms, hymns and
songs from the Spirit. Singing and making music from
your hearts to the Lord. Always giving thanks to God the
Father for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
That when you and I do these things, it points people to
Jesus. So how do you and I make a
difference? How do we use Ephesians 5 to
make a difference that we want to desperately make?
The first thing I'll tell you is we use our hands to help and not
to point fingers. I do this sometimes and it's
wrong. We like to make fun of the
generations that are coming after us, and it's easy to make.
Fun of them, but I would just remind us that if they're so
jacked up, I would aren't we the ones that raised them?
So like, if they stink, I guess we just have to admit that we
stink as parents. I hear all the time people
saying, you know, this younger generation and sports and all
that stuff. It's impossible to get kids to
come to church and the schedule is absolutely crazy.
You know how you could solve all of that?
Become the coach. When you become the coach and
you use your hands to help instead of point fingers, they
practice when you want to practice.
They go to the tournaments that you want to go to.
And by making that simple move, instead of sports pulling your
kids away from church, you can use sports to pull kids to
church, which is the strategy that we ran and you got you got
maybe going. But Clayton, I'm not, I don't
know sports all that well. Can you beat a 10 year old?
Like I could dominate any 10 year old league right now.
I guess that makes me the coach, doesn't it?
Like unless it's cross country, but Hensels don't run.
OK, So I ain't we ain't getting involved in that ministry.
All right, if my kids want to start like cross country, I'd
have to do a paternity test. I'd be like, that is not our DNA
promise. Not even a hint of it.
There should be a line out the door at all of our churches for
men to invest in our kids ministry.
When I was writing the sermon, I'm praying that this weekend,
50 men would go. You know what?
I'm ready to serve and make a difference in kids ministry.
I'm ready to be a spiritual coach for kids.
There's so many single moms attending our church and for
them, for those kids to have one hour where a man invests in
them, encourages them, speaks into them, and shows them how to
be a man of God could be absolutely life changing.
Some of you need to think about retiring early, coming on staff
for free so that you can be available to help men become the
husbands that they need to be because they never saw how a
husband was supposed to operate. Show them how to be a father
because they never had a father. We are people who don't point
fingers. We use our hands to help.
Second thing I would tell you, don't let pride get in the way
of your progress. Too many times we let pride get
in the way of us becoming who God created and designed us to
be. Recently, I took up the game of
golf because I wanted a chance to meet people who didn't go to
church and I wanted a chance to have spiritual conversations.
And you kind of get some isolated time there.
And it's been actually really wonderful.
In fact, during first service today, one of the guys that I
have been hanging out with got baptized and one of the big
surprises to me was how horrible I am at golf.
I thought I was going to be way better than I am, but oh man,
I'm I'm just horrible. I'm unsafe and so there are so
many people who have come along on the journey with me to
resource me to help me get better.
My putter and my 60° wedge are from Lucas.
My irons and most of my drivers are from Pat and Connie.
My other driver is from from Mike.
My ball marker is from Dan. My golf balls are from Craig.
My towel is from Andrew. My shoes are from Ben.
Like everybody just keeps resourcing because they don't
want me to kill somebody. Like before they accept Jesus, I
don't want to be doing a funeral.
Like I, I, I did it. I hit him right in the head with
a golf ball. And so where people are just
coming alongside of me. And when I'm out there golfing,
everybody is helping me because I'm like, how do you?
I mean, I spend so much time in sand traps.
I'm like Clayton Hasselhoff, like, I'm just going to start
wearing Shorty red shorts when I go golfing.
It's just brutal. But every single one of them
will tell me, hey, when you're getting ready to do this, you
should try it this way or roll your wrist or keep your weight
on your foot foot or your back foot.
They're constantly trying to help me, and they're trying to
help me get better because I keep humbling myself and saying
I need help in this area. And if only some men in our
church would humble themselves and say, I don't know how to
read the Bible. I don't know how to pray.
I don't know how to navigate things spiritually in my home.
I I don't know how to connect with my wife anymore.
I, I feel like I'm getting distance with my kids and I need
a guide. If only a few men would humble
themselves, Do you know what the people on our staff would do the
moment they heard something like that?
They would clear their schedule and they would say, we start
tomorrow. If you would humble yourselves,
people would help you grow in your relationship with Jesus
Christ. But our pride is getting away of
the progress that God wants to take in your life.
And just so you know, the people that I'm golfing with are not
Tiger Woods. They're just better than me.
And some of you need to realize that if you've been following
Jesus for a while, you have something to offer the people
around you. That when you spend time in the
Word of God, with the Spirit of God and with the people of God,
you have something to help other people grow in their
relationship. With God.
Here's the other thing I tell you.
You need to train for your testimony.
What story do you want to be able to tell long term?
What do you want the story of your kids or your grandkids to
be? Start training them.
It's impossible to talk about training and parenting without
talking about Proverbs 22 verse 6.
Train up a child and the way he should go.
And when he is old, he will not depart from it.
In our home, when Jennifer leaves, I make the boys help
clean the house. And then I'll I'll mess certain
stuff up in the living room. And then I'll have them come in
and I'll quiz them about what's wrong and what needs fixed.
Because I want them to be attuned to how their mom wants
the house so that way they can make the adjustments.
Because one of these days they're going to have a wife.
And I want them to know how to make what matters to their wife
matter to them. I want my There's a 0% chance
that my boys are going to have to navigate or pay their
mortgage with their fastball. There's a 0% chance that my kids
are going to pay their health insurance premiums with their
golf swing. There's 100% chance that they're
going to have to navigate with a wife who's ticked off.
There is 100% chance that they're going to have to
navigate a prayer that goes unanswered or goes gets answered
in a way that they didn't thought.
I need to train my kids for the valleys of life.
Speaking of training, ladies, can I give you a little insight?
There are two ways to train your husband.
The carrot and the stick and the carrot works best when you
affirm something in your husband, it releases all of
these chemicals inside of them and it sears in their minds.
Do that again. And when you criticize them, it
makes them want to run. Here's ladies how you need to
view your husband. You need to think of your
husband as a big dumb Labrador retriever.
He just. Wants to wag his tail?
That's all your husband wants so.
When he comes home and before he does all of his other stuff from
work, he spends like 30 seconds with the kids.
Here's what I want you to do. I love it when you spend some
time with our kids, when you come home from work and you know
what he's going to do. Oh, you love it.
Oh, OK, I love that you love it. And the next day when he comes
home, he's going to, like, slam the car door.
So you hear it and then he'll be playing with the kids and
looking through the window, you see you seeing what I'm doing.
I'm playing with our kids. And when he comes inside you, I
love it when you play with our kids outside in the road.
And he's like, I love it when I play outside in the road too.
He'll just be wagging his. Little Jesus tail.
Third day, he'll be running a parade with all the kids in the
neighborhood. Just out here, you're getting
ready to pray before the meal and you.
Put your hand on his arm and you go, would you bless the meal?
And he goes, God is great. Not as good.
We thank you for this take out food.
You know what you do, ladies? I love it when you pray prayers.
Oh yes, I love it when you pray prayers to our Heavenly Father.
I love it when you are spiritual covering over us and you know
what he's going to be doing. She likes it when we pray.
Next day you're going to get
ready to eat and he's going to go.
Our Father who are in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy
Kingdom come, thy will be done on earth.
And she's like, I love it when you pray the Lord's praise.
Like I didn't know it was the Lord's Prayer, but I love it.
You love it when I pray next day six, AMI, beseech thee, Heavenly
Father, I'm coming to you in the heavenly realms.
And I'm putting a hedge of protection around my sons.
And I'm putting a hedge of protection around my daughters.
And God, my wife went to bed angry last night.
A little bit cranky, but I know that you're a healer.
You'll be like waking up. What happened?
You affirmed him. And when you affirm your man, he
will kill for it. He will leave the house.
He will go out to war. And he will die for it.
It is hard wired into him and when you criticize or critique
he will run from it. Name the thing your husband
stinks at. Chances are he quit it.
He went fishing one time, didn't catch a fish, never went back.
Another guy went fishing, caught a fish the first time, and he's
never stopped. They run towards affirmation.
They flee criticism. So in your marriage, you want
intimacy, you want closeness, you want conversation, you want
spiritual direction. A firm, just a little bit when
you see it and he will get his big Jesus tail.
A wagon for you and you will find yourself in a relationship
with the person you dreamt you would marry.
Finally this. Is in life and in parenting
fathers, more is caught than taught.
You didn't give your kids a book when it came to changing attire.
You went outside and you did it with them.
And your kids are going to catch from you how to love God, how to
follow Him, how to treat and love and adore and serve a wife,
how to handle the highs and lows of parenting.
They are going to catch it from you.
So let them catch Jesus. They've caught your political
beliefs. They've caught your generational
sins. They've caught your anger.
They've caught your frustration, they've caught your looks,
they've caught your metabolism. Let them catch Jesus.
That's what they need. Galatians chapter 5 says this,
but the fruit of the Spirit is Lovejoy, peace, patience,
kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness,
self-control. Against such things there is no
law. The fruit of the Spirit.
Let your kids catch love, let them catch joy, let them catch
peace. Let them catch patience and
kindness. Let them catch goodness and
faithfulness. Let your kids catch gentleness
and self-control. Let them catch Jesus.
And those are called the fruit of the Spirit is because that's
what happens when the Spirit is in your life.
That means that your kids can't catch Jesus from you until you
have Jesus in you. It means that they can never
experience the love, the joy, the peace, the patience that
they're supposed to experience until they get it from you
because they're going to catch it from you.
And you might be going. But Clayton, I don't have that.
Well, the good news is you can. The Bible says that when you
come into an intimate personal relationship with Jesus Christ,
when you believe that He exists, that He died on the cross for
your sins, when you come into that right relationship through
the waters of baptism, the Bible promises that you will receive
the gift of the Holy Spirit. So he imparts the Spirit into
you, and then this is what the Spirit produces in you.
And no matter where you are on your journey today, you can
begin that journey towards an intimate personal relationship
today. And when you do that, you put
yourself in a position where you can pass on that goodness, that
gentleness, that self-control because you have finally
acquired it in Him. Men, your kids are going to
catch something from you. Make sure that they catch Jesus.
We're moving to a time of decision.
Fathers. You will never be who God
created you to be. You will never be who your
family needs you to be until you have an intimate, personal
relationship with Jesus Christ. And Satan knows how critical the
direction that you take is. That's why you can come to
church for years, hear sermons for years, have a desire to
pursue Jesus for years, but never actually get around to
doing it. Because every time you get ready
to take a step, Satan has intercepted it.
Satan has stopped it. You might be the most
spiritually contested battleground in our region.
It's because Satan knows that if he can keep the men, he can keep
the family. What if today you pursue pursue
Jesus not just on behalf of yourself, but on behalf of your
family, your future family? Because wherever you go, your
family will follow. That means that the spiritual
decisions you make will have generational implications.
That means that you are right. Now, in a pivotal moment in time
where you will be making decisions that will impact those
who will come after you, what decision are you going to make?
You can choose to follow Jesus, chase after Him, grow in your
relationship with Him, start a relationship with Him, or you
can choose to walk away and let Satan win.
And I know that there's a battle going on right now because there
are some of you who are going. I think He's talking to me and
that's not me. That is the Holy Spirit saying
it's time, it's long overdue. It's time to answer the prayers
that your mom's and your dad's and your wives have been
praying. Today's the day where Jesus
wins. And if that's you, it's just a
few moments. The people around you are going
to stand and worship, and some of them are going to come to the
steps and pray. And I'm going to encourage you
to walk right over there underneath that screen next to
that baptistry, and start asking the questions that you know need
to be asked, making the decisions that you know need to
be made, not just for you, but for those you love who will come
after you to the rest of you in the room.
Would you pray for the men in your life?
There might be a harder Rd. that they walk because of the
significance that they play in the spiritual direction of your
home. So instead of criticizing him,
would you pray for him? Would you pray that you would be
a great support system for him? Would you pray for your sons and
your daughters? Your son in
Do a work that only you can do in ways that only you can make
happen. God, you know that there are
people in the sound of my voice who desperately need to
surrender their life to you. And God, I know that right now
there is indeed a battle going on in their mind.
But God, I know that you can win any battle, but there's no one
greater than you, stronger than you, more powerful than you.
So God, with your help, give us the ability to win the war right
now and move in the direction that you would have us to move.
And your name I pray. Amen.