1 00:00:02,300 --> 00:00:03,600 Well, good morning, Christian Church. 2 00:00:03,600 --> 00:00:07,900 How are you doing today? It is good to be in the house of 3 00:00:07,900 --> 00:00:10,000 the Lord. It is good to be with the people 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,500 of the Lord. It is good to be studying the 5 00:00:12,500 --> 00:00:16,000 word of the Lord, applying that to our lives, and allowing it to 6 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:19,200 change us, and it will change us forever. 7 00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:22,000 Amen. It is so good to welcome. 8 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:25,400 All the campuses that are joining with us all across this 9 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,900 region, 11 locations, every one that's inside. 10 00:00:28,900 --> 00:00:32,500 Every one that's online. I've already got a great text 11 00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:39,500 today that inside is all back so I know they've been like open 12 00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:44,200 and shot and and lockdown and all sorts of things like that. 13 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:47,500 And I'm just thankful to know that the word of God is going 14 00:00:47,500 --> 00:00:51,000 out with all of you as well, that's incredible. 15 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:56,600 And if you're like me I've been spending a lot of time watching 16 00:00:56,600 --> 00:01:00,000 the news because my heart is really going out to the people 17 00:01:00,100 --> 00:01:04,400 People of Ukraine right now. And of course, from last week to 18 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:09,400 this week, things have really amped up and things that were 19 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:13,800 frightening me. When I was a kid in the 60s, is 20 00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:16,300 those things are fomenting again. 21 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,200 What I want us to do again. Today, is pray. 22 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:22,300 I want us to pray for our brothers and sisters in Ukraine. 23 00:01:22,300 --> 00:01:28,900 I want us to pray that God, he's never not in control, he's in 24 00:01:28,900 --> 00:01:32,400 control. Just we just need to rest in 25 00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:35,000 him. So if you're feeling anxiety 26 00:01:35,100 --> 00:01:38,000 about it, like I think all of us are to some extent. 27 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:42,100 Let's just rest in the Lord, trust in him because he isn't 28 00:01:42,100 --> 00:01:44,500 surprised by anything. Let's just take a moment and 29 00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:47,500 let's just pray Heavenly Father. We pray right now for the people 30 00:01:47,500 --> 00:01:53,200 of Ukraine, we pray that you would protect them as they're 31 00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:58,700 being attacked. Father, I pray that that you 32 00:01:58,700 --> 00:02:04,400 would calm people that are involved in and that father, you 33 00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:07,100 would be even glorified in the midst of it. 34 00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:10,699 I think about the scripture that says that you'll hear about wars 35 00:02:10,699 --> 00:02:14,900 and rumors of wars, and I know that that's associated with the 36 00:02:14,900 --> 00:02:19,800 coming of your son. So I just pray father that you 37 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:23,300 would we would recognize your lordship over this situation 38 00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:26,800 that we would just continue to pray that you'd be glorified 39 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:29,400 father and that your people would be protected. 40 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:32,400 We pray that in Jesus name. Amen. 41 00:02:33,700 --> 00:02:38,600 So we're in this series called better and we're talking about 42 00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:42,200 winning at home and I just want to start with a question, all 43 00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:45,300 right? And here's my question is kind 44 00:02:45,300 --> 00:02:51,800 of a, you know, see if you can figure it out what do lovebirds 45 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:58,400 Puffins mice, Albatross? I don't know what the plural is 46 00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:01,800 for Albatross. I'm just going to say Albatross 47 00:03:02,600 --> 00:03:09,800 coyotes bald eagles vultures beavers, lizards doves, 48 00:03:09,800 --> 00:03:18,900 seahorses Gibbons, cranes, owls geese, voles swans, monkeys 49 00:03:19,500 --> 00:03:26,100 pigeons, parakeets, macaws, As wolves angelfish. 50 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:30,500 Foxes Penguins. Sea, turtles, flatworms. 51 00:03:30,500 --> 00:03:38,500 And Condors have in common They all mate for life. 52 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:41,500 How many of you got that, right? Yeah. 53 00:03:41,500 --> 00:03:44,900 See it's pretty good. And although they only account 54 00:03:44,900 --> 00:03:48,200 for a small percentage of all the animals in the animal 55 00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:50,000 kingdom, it's pretty fascinating. 56 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:53,700 Think about that. How fascinating is it that God 57 00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:58,200 pre-wired those particular animal species to do that too? 58 00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:00,500 Literally? Mate for life. 59 00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:03,600 Do you know that is how we were designed? 60 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:10,600 That we were designed by God to mate for life, but unlike 61 00:04:10,700 --> 00:04:14,100 animals who consistently act, according to their created 62 00:04:14,100 --> 00:04:16,200 nature, and I want to stop right there. 63 00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:19,300 Do you realize that do you realize that everything an 64 00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:23,900 animal does? He does because he is acting in 65 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:26,200 perfect, harmony with his created nature. 66 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:29,900 It is how God created that animal to be. 67 00:04:30,700 --> 00:04:33,800 So when you get upset potty training your puppy just 68 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:37,300 understand. He's acting according to his 69 00:04:37,300 --> 00:04:41,600 created nature but he makes you act differently. 70 00:04:42,100 --> 00:04:47,400 Then you're created nature. So we were designed by God a 71 00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,300 little bit different than the animals, right? 72 00:04:49,300 --> 00:04:51,200 Actually quite a bit different because we were made in the 73 00:04:51,200 --> 00:04:55,700 image of God and God gave us something that is a reflection 74 00:04:55,700 --> 00:04:59,900 of him because God as a sovereign, God has an absolute 75 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:04,600 right to make any choice. He wants and he gave us rights 76 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:08,400 to make choices. And so we can choose not to act. 77 00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:12,500 According to our created nature, we can choose whether to follow 78 00:05:12,500 --> 00:05:16,600 God's plan or not. Follow God's plan, unlike all of 79 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:20,000 those animals. Now, you and I, we were not 80 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:24,600 designed to act like a feral dog, or a feral cat. although 81 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:30,600 some of us have and some of us do, the Bible is crystal clear 82 00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:33,500 that we were designed to mate for life. 83 00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:38,100 Now I know right now as I'm speaking you're saying up, 84 00:05:38,100 --> 00:05:41,800 Jerry's going to do a sermon on marriage and half of you are 85 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,100 saying that doesn't really apply to me. 86 00:05:44,100 --> 00:05:49,500 Exactly right now in the, the season of life, I'm in, I know 87 00:05:49,500 --> 00:05:52,300 that I'm dealing with half of you that are presently married, 88 00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:56,500 the other half of you haven't gotten married yet and you'll 89 00:05:56,500 --> 00:06:00,200 want to You haven't gotten married yet and you don't want 90 00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:04,800 to you'd like to stay single, you have gotten married but it 91 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:09,300 ended in divorce and some of you have been separated by death 92 00:06:09,300 --> 00:06:14,800 you've been you're a widow or a widower but all of us regardless 93 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:19,600 of our current situation in life are connected to this idea of 94 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:23,600 marriage and it is of critical importance to all of us. 95 00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:28,200 And if it's true that we are hard-wired by God for this 96 00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:30,600 relationship, then let me ask you a question. 97 00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:39,400 Why is it so hard? Why are we surrounded with so 98 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:42,400 many tragic stories of like bitter divorce? 99 00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:47,100 Or custody battles or infidelity broken homes? 100 00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:51,800 Scarred and cynical children blended family struggles with 101 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:55,100 step parents and stepbrothers and stepsisters one-night 102 00:06:55,100 --> 00:06:59,400 stands, sexual regret. A pandemic of pornography 103 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:03,800 deviant sexual behavior, the victimization of sex trafficking 104 00:07:03,900 --> 00:07:09,500 and child sexual abuse. Why If this is how we were 105 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:16,600 pre-wired by God, it's because marriage is the most basic 106 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:20,700 construct of The Human Condition, and the human 107 00:07:20,700 --> 00:07:23,000 Community. That's a big statement by the 108 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,000 way, and I'm going to back it up. 109 00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:30,900 And if Satan can confuse marriage, if he can confuse that 110 00:07:30,900 --> 00:07:35,600 most basic construct, if he can confuse it, if he can twist it, 111 00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:42,000 if he could break it, he wins. It's at the root of who we are. 112 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:45,900 That's another big statement. The root of who we are. 113 00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:49,800 At least from the perspective of God. 114 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:53,800 Now, I want to prove that to you. 115 00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:57,500 I want you to think about how the Bible begins. 116 00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:02,400 Like when you just open it up, you get past the faux leather, 117 00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:06,100 leather cover, And the title pages. 118 00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:09,600 Where are you? Like, how does the bible 119 00:08:09,600 --> 00:08:11,800 actually begin? Do you know it actually begins 120 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:15,900 with a wedding. So God creates everything right 121 00:08:15,900 --> 00:08:19,100 in Genesis. One talks about how he put it 122 00:08:19,100 --> 00:08:22,900 together and as soon as he puts it together, there's a wedding 123 00:08:23,300 --> 00:08:26,500 Genesis chapter 2 verses 21 to 25. 124 00:08:26,900 --> 00:08:29,800 So the Lord God caused man to fall into a deep sleep. 125 00:08:30,100 --> 00:08:33,600 And while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and 126 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,900 then closed up the place with flesh. 127 00:08:36,799 --> 00:08:39,500 Then the Lord, God made a woman from the rib. 128 00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:42,799 He had taken out of the man and he brought her to the man. 129 00:08:43,799 --> 00:08:47,700 In the man said, oh, thank you, God. 130 00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:59,500 This is now bone of my bones and Flesh of My Flesh. 131 00:08:59,900 --> 00:09:05,300 She shall be called woman for. She was taken out of, man, that 132 00:09:05,300 --> 00:09:09,400 is why a man leaves, his father and mother and is United to his 133 00:09:09,400 --> 00:09:14,500 wife and they become, would you say that with me one flesh? 134 00:09:14,700 --> 00:09:17,900 Wow, Adam and his wife were both naked. 135 00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:22,300 That's thank you, God, right? That was that. 136 00:09:22,700 --> 00:09:26,700 And they felt no shame. Bible begins with a wedding. 137 00:09:28,300 --> 00:09:35,900 God gave the first bride away. You know how the Bible ends? 138 00:09:38,100 --> 00:09:42,300 With a wedding. It's in Revelation chapter 12 139 00:09:42,300 --> 00:09:47,100 chapter 21 verses 1 to 4, and then I saw a new Heaven and a 140 00:09:47,108 --> 00:09:50,700 new Earth for the first Heaven, and the first Earth had passed 141 00:09:50,700 --> 00:09:56,100 away. and there was no longer any sea and then I saw the holy 142 00:09:56,100 --> 00:10:02,000 city, the New Jerusalem, Coming down. 143 00:10:03,100 --> 00:10:07,300 Out of Heaven, you know, you are his New Jerusalem, you are his 144 00:10:07,300 --> 00:10:12,700 Temple. Created with living stones. 145 00:10:15,300 --> 00:10:19,100 Prepared, as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. 146 00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:24,000 And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, look, God's 147 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,800 dwelling. Place is now among the people 148 00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:29,300 and He will dwell with them. I go to prepare a place for you. 149 00:10:30,100 --> 00:10:33,400 I will come again and receive you to myself that where I am, 150 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:38,900 there you may be also They will be his people and he himself 151 00:10:38,900 --> 00:10:41,800 will be with them and be their God. 152 00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:47,300 And he will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no 153 00:10:47,300 --> 00:10:52,200 more death or Mourning or crying or pain. for the old Order of 154 00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:56,100 Things has passed away, just before this in Revelation 155 00:10:56,100 --> 00:11:02,600 actually talks about the feast the wedding feast, Is that 156 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:04,600 enough? Nah, let's go a little further. 157 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:07,700 It was the backdrop for Jesus's entire Ministry. 158 00:11:07,700 --> 00:11:09,500 How did Jesus began his ministry? 159 00:11:11,700 --> 00:11:14,700 I mean you have these like little stories, a couple of 160 00:11:14,708 --> 00:11:17,500 little stories like when he was 12 and when he was born, you 161 00:11:17,500 --> 00:11:20,400 have to have that. But it's all pretty silent until 162 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:22,600 you get to the beginning of his ministry and the beginning of 163 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:27,500 his ministry was all wedding. It was in a place called Cana of 164 00:11:27,500 --> 00:11:31,300 Galilee. You got a little bit angry with 165 00:11:31,300 --> 00:11:35,500 his mother because she wasn't he didn't, you know, I'm not, I 166 00:11:35,508 --> 00:11:37,300 don't know if I want to do this yet. 167 00:11:37,700 --> 00:11:40,100 They have no wine. Remember that? 168 00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:43,900 And Jesus turned the water into wine. 169 00:11:44,300 --> 00:11:48,500 It began his ministry and it was his very first miracle. 170 00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:57,200 And it was at a wedding. You remember how Jesus ended his 171 00:11:57,200 --> 00:12:01,300 ministry on Earth? He ended us Ministry on Earth in 172 00:12:01,300 --> 00:12:03,900 an upper room and in that upper room. 173 00:12:04,300 --> 00:12:08,500 He started telling his disciples getting them prepared for what 174 00:12:08,500 --> 00:12:13,600 was going to come next. and some of the most profound words, he 175 00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:19,000 ever said, we're said in that room, When he said let not your 176 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:22,600 heart be troubled, you believe in God believe also in me in my 177 00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:24,900 father's house are many mansions. 178 00:12:24,900 --> 00:12:28,800 If it were not. So I would have told you I go to 179 00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:33,000 prepare a place for you and if I go to prepare a place for you, I 180 00:12:33,008 --> 00:12:35,100 will come again. And receive you to myself that 181 00:12:35,100 --> 00:12:40,100 where I am, there you may be also wedding language. 182 00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:44,700 What? Every prospective groom said to 183 00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:49,300 a prospective bride, it was The Proposal. 184 00:12:51,100 --> 00:12:55,800 Of the Jewish culture. It book ended his ministry. 185 00:12:57,000 --> 00:13:00,200 It's the Earthly relationship that the Apostle Paul under the 186 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:05,000 inspiration of God chose to help us understand the Eternal 187 00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:09,700 relationship, Union between Christ and his bride. 188 00:13:09,700 --> 00:13:15,000 The church will get into that in a minute. so, when you look at 189 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:20,000 God's word kind of in totality, you can see But this is a very, 190 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:23,300 very big deal to God and it's no wonder that it's being attacked. 191 00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:28,500 Now, I want to I want to get something straight here. 192 00:13:28,900 --> 00:13:32,600 This sermon is only going to last about a half an hour, and 193 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:36,200 that's not near enough time for the investment that this 194 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:38,600 requires. And this is something that is so 195 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:43,400 critical for for all of us to understand, whether we're in, 196 00:13:43,700 --> 00:13:46,900 you know, in hard times right now, we're considering marriage 197 00:13:46,900 --> 00:13:49,800 right now we're on the other end of marriage and we want to be 198 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:52,000 able to Mentor other people, you know. 199 00:13:52,100 --> 00:13:55,100 So Alice and I are going to begin leading marriage, Retreats 200 00:13:55,100 --> 00:13:58,900 its Be coming in the fall and it's going to happen in our new 201 00:13:58,900 --> 00:14:01,300 retreat center. And that's being built right 202 00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:03,700 now, Paul put together right now, and we're going to train 203 00:14:03,700 --> 00:14:05,300 other leaders, how to do it as well. 204 00:14:05,300 --> 00:14:09,500 Because this is going to have to be a very major deal for the 205 00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:13,200 crossing, and it would be an incredible investment for you. 206 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:16,600 And I'll just, if you want to cheat, I'll help you. 207 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,100 Because we're going to be working out of three different 208 00:14:19,100 --> 00:14:22,700 books that we're going to have everyone read. 209 00:14:22,700 --> 00:14:25,200 Here's the 31, the five languages. 210 00:14:25,300 --> 00:14:28,100 Of love. By Gary Chapman. 211 00:14:28,100 --> 00:14:30,600 Some of you may already understand that one's going to 212 00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:33,000 be love and respect by Emerson Aggregates. 213 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:36,500 And one of them is the one that we discussed last week, becoming 214 00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:41,300 Better Together by EPS each. One of these has a different 215 00:14:41,300 --> 00:14:45,100 approach to understanding and addressing how marriage was 216 00:14:45,100 --> 00:14:48,400 designed by God, to work becoming Better Together was a 217 00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:51,700 book about structure, the structure of a relationship and 218 00:14:51,700 --> 00:14:55,800 timing of the relationship, and I dealt with that one last week, 219 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,000 okay? Okay, but today I'm going to 220 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:01,300 spend time on the other two, but I'm just going to touch on them. 221 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,200 So you're going to have to hang on, right? 222 00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:06,500 We're going to spend that little bit of time on the five 223 00:15:06,500 --> 00:15:10,100 languages of love. This is an emotional look at 224 00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:13,700 marriage and love and respect which is a classic gender-based 225 00:15:13,700 --> 00:15:17,900 biblical look at marriage. So I want us to dive in, Okay? 226 00:15:18,100 --> 00:15:22,000 So I want to see how many people I relate to right now. 227 00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:27,600 After church today. Going to get in the car. 228 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:34,100 And some of you will go home. But a lot of you are going to go 229 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:43,000 out to eat. And the guys going to say, Where 230 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:49,700 would you like to eat dear? And what is her answer going to 231 00:15:49,700 --> 00:15:54,400 be gentleman? I don't know wherever you'd like 232 00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:57,000 to eat. Now, listen, I know something 233 00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:59,000 about guys. They are three. 234 00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:03,100 They are thinking of one word, has three letters, and it is 235 00:16:03,100 --> 00:16:07,400 this eat. Just that. 236 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:13,800 A lot of guys don't really care if it's a taco or a hamburger or 237 00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:16,200 something fancy, they just want to eat. 238 00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,500 Let's just get that one checked off and move on to the next 239 00:16:18,500 --> 00:16:22,000 thing, right? But that's not what she's 240 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:23,600 thinking. I'll get to that in a second. 241 00:16:24,300 --> 00:16:26,900 I don't know, dear wherever you'd like to eat, guys. 242 00:16:26,900 --> 00:16:29,900 Don't have a problem making decisions because they don't get 243 00:16:29,900 --> 00:16:33,500 emotionally invested into decision-making, they just make 244 00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:37,200 one. So you're pulling off to one of 245 00:16:37,208 --> 00:16:39,700 the local restaurants. Okay, I'll make the decision and 246 00:16:39,700 --> 00:16:41,800 then she goes. No, I ate there on Tuesday. 247 00:16:45,400 --> 00:16:48,900 Okay. Didn't where would you like to 248 00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:52,500 eat? I don't know wherever you'd like 249 00:16:52,500 --> 00:16:55,700 to eat. Listen, I've been married to my 250 00:16:55,700 --> 00:16:59,400 wife, nearly 40 years and we have gotten so far down this 251 00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:02,300 road, she will. Now tell me here are four 252 00:17:02,300 --> 00:17:08,200 choices. You can't make She still won't 253 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:11,200 make the decision, right? Why is that? 254 00:17:11,300 --> 00:17:13,400 Why is that? I'll tell you why. 255 00:17:13,599 --> 00:17:16,500 I already said, guys don't get emotionally invested in 256 00:17:16,508 --> 00:17:20,900 decision-making because they just only think of very small 257 00:17:20,900 --> 00:17:23,400 one thing at a time. Women are literally thinking of 258 00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:28,400 everything in their life, all at the same time, they're thinking 259 00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:30,300 three-dimensionally, not two-dimensionally. 260 00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:33,300 They're thinking about how what I have to do with the kids. 261 00:17:33,300 --> 00:17:35,300 This afternoon, they're thinking about what my house looks like. 262 00:17:35,300 --> 00:17:38,300 They're thinking about other things that are necessary, 263 00:17:38,300 --> 00:17:40,900 they're thinking about who they might meet and who they don't 264 00:17:40,900 --> 00:17:42,300 want to meet, that could be at that Resident. 265 00:17:42,300 --> 00:17:46,100 A million other things and that's why it's so hard to make 266 00:17:46,100 --> 00:17:49,700 a decision. It's not because they're just 267 00:17:49,700 --> 00:17:53,800 indecisive, it's because they're emotionally invested in that 268 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:56,200 decision because a lot of things could happen. 269 00:17:56,200 --> 00:18:02,400 When the guys thinking what Now, I just connected to a whole 270 00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:09,700 bunch of you. but there's some of you that went I don't know 271 00:18:09,700 --> 00:18:13,000 what he's talking about because I'm talking about a gender 272 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:16,200 stereotype. It's a gender stereotype that we 273 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:20,600 actually get from God's word. But not everyone fits into that 274 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,700 stereotype. Let me tell you why I'm saying 275 00:18:22,700 --> 00:18:27,800 that Ephesians, 5:21 to 32. Don't forget this first one, 276 00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:30,800 I'll come back to it. Submit to one another out of 277 00:18:30,800 --> 00:18:35,400 reverence for Christ. That is the whole deal right 278 00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:39,000 there. Now, how do we do that wives 279 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:42,600 submit to your husband's as to your own husband's, as to the 280 00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:45,200 Lord. For the husband is the head of 281 00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:48,300 the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body of which 282 00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:52,100 he is a savior now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives 283 00:18:52,100 --> 00:18:53,700 should submit to their husbands in everything. 284 00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:55,800 And you know what husbands they just want to end right there. 285 00:18:58,700 --> 00:19:01,700 That's just her submission. That's not his submission. 286 00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:08,900 Husbands, love your wives. Just as Christ loved the church, 287 00:19:08,900 --> 00:19:13,400 stop it. How much did Christ loved the 288 00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:18,900 church? To be nailed to a cross. 289 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:22,900 And I've had a lot of guys upset in their marriage, but I've 290 00:19:22,900 --> 00:19:24,800 never seen nail prints in their hands. 291 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:33,200 And gave himself up for her. That means you can make any 292 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:35,500 decision you want guys because the husband is the head of the 293 00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:40,200 wife but she has total veto power because loving her is more 294 00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:45,900 important than your decision. Oh, someone's going to clap. 295 00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:54,500 finally, I got a sermon that connect to To make her holy 296 00:19:54,500 --> 00:19:56,300 cleansing her. By the washing with water, 297 00:19:56,300 --> 00:19:59,600 through the word, wow. Is talking about spiritual 298 00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:02,200 leadership there. And to present her to himself as 299 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:05,300 a Radiant Church. Interesting that he calls a 300 00:20:05,300 --> 00:20:09,000 woman a church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish. 301 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:13,100 But holy and blameless in the same way husband's ought to love 302 00:20:13,100 --> 00:20:16,100 their own wives as their own bodies, he who loves his wife, 303 00:20:16,100 --> 00:20:20,100 loves himself after all, no one ever hated their own body, but 304 00:20:20,100 --> 00:20:25,300 they feed and care for, I Too much just as Christ does the 305 00:20:25,300 --> 00:20:28,100 church. We're all members of his body 306 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:31,300 for this reason, a man will leave his father and his mother 307 00:20:31,300 --> 00:20:33,700 and be United to his wife and the two will become say it. 308 00:20:35,700 --> 00:20:40,200 This is a profound mystery, but I'm talking about Christ in the 309 00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:42,600 church. What I thought he was talking 310 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:46,600 about marriage. Well, he is because our Earthly 311 00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:50,700 marriages are all true are all designed to help us understand 312 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:59,900 our Heavenly marriage, Eternal one, Go back to Ephesians 5:21 313 00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:04,300 because the overall view is mutual submission submit to one 314 00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:06,000 another out of reverence for Christ. 315 00:21:06,100 --> 00:21:10,400 Let me help you understand that. I want you to picture here an 316 00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:13,200 invisible altar. Okay. 317 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:17,000 Like altars in the Old Testament and in the New Testament Were 318 00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:20,300 Made of Stone. And what would what happened at 319 00:21:20,300 --> 00:21:24,900 an altar, an animal was brought and then sacrificed right on 320 00:21:24,900 --> 00:21:28,200 this altar. So I want you to imagine. 321 00:21:28,900 --> 00:21:31,200 Have you ever heard people are going to get married to get the 322 00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:33,400 go to the altar? Have you heard that before? 323 00:21:34,100 --> 00:21:37,900 So what does that actually mean? Well okay, I'll be the groom. 324 00:21:39,300 --> 00:21:41,200 Here I am. There's the altar. 325 00:21:42,100 --> 00:21:44,900 Here's everything I Han am everything. 326 00:21:44,900 --> 00:21:48,100 I want to be every hope, every dream. 327 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:54,500 Everything. And I'm walking it over to this 328 00:21:54,500 --> 00:21:58,100 altar. Here's the bride. 329 00:21:59,700 --> 00:22:04,400 Everything that she is everything she hopes to be every 330 00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:08,900 hope, every dream. And she brings it to the altar. 331 00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:19,800 The altars burning. And they lay. 332 00:22:20,900 --> 00:22:24,600 All that is their life. On this altar. 333 00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:33,100 As a burnt offering. Marital love is supposed to be 334 00:22:33,100 --> 00:22:38,500 Selfless. Love Altar of burnt offering 335 00:22:38,500 --> 00:22:42,000 love. One flesh. 336 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:49,500 Love, because God takes two lives to hopes to dreams to 337 00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:55,500 realities, and he forges it into a single one flesh relationship. 338 00:22:55,500 --> 00:22:57,800 Only God can do it. Jesus taught it. 339 00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:00,600 In Matthew chapter, 19 Verses 4 to 6. 340 00:23:00,700 --> 00:23:03,000 He said haven't you read he replied that in the beginning 341 00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:07,600 the Creator made them male and female and said for this reason, 342 00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:09,400 a man will leave his father and his mother. 343 00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:10,800 Mother, and be United to his wife. 344 00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:14,300 And the two will become One flesh. 345 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:20,700 So they are no longer two. You thought I just made that up. 346 00:23:20,700 --> 00:23:23,300 It's poetic no. It's just Jesus. 347 00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:25,700 They are no longer two but one flesh. 348 00:23:25,700 --> 00:23:28,100 Therefore, what God has joined together. 349 00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:32,200 Let no one separate. It's also back in Ephesians 350 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:35,200 verse 31 of chapter 5. For this reason, a man will 351 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,500 leave his father and mother and be United to his wife and the 352 00:23:37,500 --> 00:23:42,200 two will become one flesh. We surrender ourselves to each 353 00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:46,700 other and we form one new identity and it happens under 354 00:23:46,700 --> 00:23:50,800 the lordship of Jesus Christ and the power Of almighty God. 355 00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:55,000 That's how we form. One new identity. 356 00:23:58,500 --> 00:24:04,600 So, Some of you. Really connecting with what I'm 357 00:24:04,600 --> 00:24:11,000 saying, because it is classic. And what Ephesians 5 is teaching 358 00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:13,800 is classic male, female stereotypes. 359 00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:18,500 And you notice what they're asking men, and women to do 360 00:24:18,500 --> 00:24:22,600 that, that husbands or prospective husband, husbands 361 00:24:22,700 --> 00:24:26,200 have to love their wives and then gives the specific of how 362 00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:31,600 their to love their wives. So it's about love and wife has 363 00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:36,700 a responsibility of respecting Her husband, let me tell you 364 00:24:36,700 --> 00:24:38,900 what that is actually accomplishing. 365 00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:41,200 I'm going to write this word. Okay. 366 00:24:41,300 --> 00:24:45,800 Love. And then this one respect. 367 00:24:55,500 --> 00:24:58,300 These two things are mutually edifying. 368 00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:04,600 In other words, if a wife is respecting her husband, it 369 00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:10,300 should have the effect of empowering him to love his wife. 370 00:25:12,300 --> 00:25:17,200 And if a man is properly loving his wife, it empowers her to 371 00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:22,400 properly, respect her husband. But we're going to call this. 372 00:25:26,100 --> 00:25:33,300 The crazy cycle. I'm going to tell you why. 373 00:25:34,900 --> 00:25:36,800 Because it tends to go the other way. 374 00:25:39,900 --> 00:25:47,000 It happens to go the other way. So, Well, what a woman needs 375 00:25:47,300 --> 00:25:52,900 generally is emotional security. And there's nothing wrong with 376 00:25:52,900 --> 00:25:54,600 that. Women tend to need emotional 377 00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:55,600 security. You know why? 378 00:25:55,600 --> 00:26:01,400 Because emotional being emotional is their currency. 379 00:26:01,900 --> 00:26:06,500 They give themselves and they don't do it in pieces or parts, 380 00:26:06,500 --> 00:26:13,700 I mean they they fully invest and, They require that. 381 00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:17,600 It's like putting like it's like me like you driving your car and 382 00:26:17,700 --> 00:26:19,800 you run out of gas. You get mad at your car. 383 00:26:21,100 --> 00:26:24,800 Because that's what they run on. And you need to keep it filled 384 00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:27,000 up. So if they need emotional 385 00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:28,800 security, they receive that through love, if they're 386 00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:32,300 convinced that their husband loves them. 387 00:26:32,300 --> 00:26:35,600 It provides for their emotional security men. 388 00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:40,000 On the other hand won't respect. You think a man would rather 389 00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:44,100 hear I love you or would you rather hear? 390 00:26:44,100 --> 00:26:45,800 I feel safe when I'm in your arms. 391 00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:53,200 Men tend to love things that project strength respect. 392 00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:57,700 And so there are ways that we have to understand. 393 00:26:57,700 --> 00:27:00,700 Again this is stereotypical, but there are ways that we need to 394 00:27:00,700 --> 00:27:05,400 understand how this works and so this is how that Mutual 395 00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:08,300 edification grows a relationship. 396 00:27:08,300 --> 00:27:12,300 But it also goes the other way because if a husband starts 397 00:27:12,300 --> 00:27:16,100 loving other things and he just compartmentalizes his love for 398 00:27:16,100 --> 00:27:18,100 his wife. What ends up happening? 399 00:27:18,100 --> 00:27:21,900 She gets frustrated with that and responds with things like, 400 00:27:21,900 --> 00:27:23,400 hey, be nice if you were home one. 401 00:27:23,500 --> 00:27:26,100 It's in a while. Be nice to for these kids knew 402 00:27:26,100 --> 00:27:30,800 that they had a dad, right? Disrespect disrespect, what that 403 00:27:30,800 --> 00:27:33,300 what does that do? A man makes him one to replace. 404 00:27:33,300 --> 00:27:36,300 His wife was something else like bowling. 405 00:27:39,100 --> 00:27:45,100 Or. Grilling or sorry. 406 00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:48,900 You know what I'm saying? Anything else. 407 00:27:48,900 --> 00:27:53,500 Anything else? And it starts the crazy cycle. 408 00:27:53,500 --> 00:27:56,500 Now, the crazy cycle really isn't circular. 409 00:27:56,600 --> 00:28:03,700 I don't think that's fair. It's actually this If? 410 00:28:09,700 --> 00:28:14,400 Cuz that's what happens. It's a spiral because if we 411 00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:17,900 don't receive what we need and we lash out at one another and 412 00:28:17,900 --> 00:28:20,900 they feed on each other and you start going in circles, but you 413 00:28:20,900 --> 00:28:23,800 spiral down until the relationship is utterly broken, 414 00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:28,600 right? Give me something positive 415 00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:29,800 Jerry. Here comes. 416 00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:32,900 The good news is the crazy cycle is reversible. 417 00:28:33,100 --> 00:28:36,300 The spiral is reversible, if someone can start being 418 00:28:36,300 --> 00:28:40,400 selfless, even when they don't deserve the the the partner 419 00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:43,800 doesn't deserve selflessness. If they can do that, which is 420 00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:47,900 very hard to do, it can reverse the cycle. 421 00:28:47,900 --> 00:28:50,600 The crazy cycle can move in the opposite direction. 422 00:28:50,700 --> 00:28:53,600 The spiral can go up as well as down. 423 00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,300 I've a lot more I can say about that, but that's what Retreats 424 00:28:56,300 --> 00:28:59,500 your for, that's Those that book love and respect is for, so 425 00:28:59,500 --> 00:29:00,500 we'll just have to leave it there. 426 00:29:00,500 --> 00:29:03,500 S one you're not relating to what I said. 427 00:29:03,500 --> 00:29:06,100 I've just said all that stuff and it's like there he goes in 428 00:29:06,100 --> 00:29:09,200 solid male, female stereotypes in this not fit me. 429 00:29:10,900 --> 00:29:14,700 I get it because some of us are wired differently emotionally 430 00:29:15,100 --> 00:29:18,300 and there's a lot of things that go into that how we might be 431 00:29:18,300 --> 00:29:20,400 different. Emotionally could be our roles, 432 00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:22,500 and culture could be generational issues. 433 00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:25,600 It could be the lack of to roll Miles because of single 434 00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:28,600 parenting. We all have things that 435 00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:31,300 contribute to those differences. Okay, we have a lot of 436 00:29:31,300 --> 00:29:34,200 differences here. However, each one of us has an 437 00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:38,600 emotional love language, that's irrespective of gender. 438 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:45,500 And that emotional language is how we understand how we give 439 00:29:45,500 --> 00:29:49,500 and how we receive love, and that's what we call a love 440 00:29:49,500 --> 00:29:51,400 language. Okay, so I'm going to give you 441 00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:55,900 the five love languages. So first one is words. 442 00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:08,100 Of affirmation. Words of affirmation, you know 443 00:30:08,100 --> 00:30:15,100 what that is? if, if a man's love language is 444 00:30:15,100 --> 00:30:20,700 words of affirmation, it's like you know, it could be sexual the 445 00:30:20,700 --> 00:30:27,600 sense that it's like, you know, gun show today, like your I'm 446 00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:30,600 liking that. You know. 447 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:39,300 And a guys like, yeah. It could be on the other side, 448 00:30:39,300 --> 00:30:42,600 could be receiving words of affirmation, your female like 449 00:30:42,600 --> 00:30:44,400 me. And you are defining Hot In 450 00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:46,800 Those Jeans. Right. 451 00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:50,600 It could be other things that could be like affirmation about 452 00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:53,300 what you've accomplished. Like one of you accomplishes 453 00:30:53,300 --> 00:30:55,300 something in your career in the other ones like we got to go out 454 00:30:55,300 --> 00:30:58,600 and celebrate because nobody. Nobody does that as well as you 455 00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:02,100 hear incredible, at this is words of affirmation, right? 456 00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:07,500 We got that second one. Quality time. 457 00:31:09,900 --> 00:31:17,300 Which is not the same as time. Quality time where you're 458 00:31:17,300 --> 00:31:21,700 actually accomplishing something in that time that's focused on 459 00:31:21,700 --> 00:31:25,100 your relationship or on your spouse going. 460 00:31:25,100 --> 00:31:27,100 I'm saying, let's just, we need to be together. 461 00:31:27,700 --> 00:31:31,000 We need to get reacquainted. I remember first time Allison. 462 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,300 I went to Israel. Allison was like, I'm not 463 00:31:33,300 --> 00:31:35,800 leaving my kids. I'm not leaving my kids and I 464 00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,000 had I told her I said, you know, the best thing you can do for 465 00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:40,100 your kids is give them a good marriage. 466 00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:45,200 And we need some quality time, because what happens? 467 00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:49,200 I mean life happens, right? And then you get to get 468 00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:52,200 reacquainted quality time. Does that number three? 469 00:31:54,700 --> 00:31:58,000 Ax. Of service. 470 00:32:01,900 --> 00:32:04,700 Don't you be trying to get with me when those dishes are dirty? 471 00:32:09,900 --> 00:32:13,700 Really. What's that got to do with love? 472 00:32:13,700 --> 00:32:15,800 Like vacuuming. What's that got to do with it? 473 00:32:16,500 --> 00:32:18,600 Yeah, because sometimes that's what we crave. 474 00:32:18,600 --> 00:32:21,400 We crave, service. Like when we serve one another, 475 00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,500 that's what it's about. Number four. 476 00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:34,200 Physical touch. Is it goal touch? 477 00:32:39,300 --> 00:32:46,500 Physical touch is not always sexual touch. right, it's a lot 478 00:32:46,500 --> 00:32:50,900 of it has to do with just Like those people that sat in front 479 00:32:50,900 --> 00:32:54,300 of you last week at church and it's like, would you just stop 480 00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:57,100 you know, like where are you know they're doing this with the 481 00:32:57,300 --> 00:33:01,700 hair on the back of the other person stop it, you know? 482 00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:04,200 And it's because they're communicate, they're actually 483 00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:07,600 communicating non-verbally, that's a love language. 484 00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:10,200 You're actually experiencing holding hands when you walk. 485 00:33:10,500 --> 00:33:14,100 You know, that kind of that kind of thing where there's actually 486 00:33:14,500 --> 00:33:19,200 touch involved you know it isn't necessarily sexual but it can be 487 00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:26,100 Actually last one. Gifts. 488 00:33:31,100 --> 00:33:33,300 And it's not, if you love me, buy me a Lamborghini. 489 00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:38,800 It can be something simple. Like I can tell you in my 490 00:33:38,800 --> 00:33:40,900 marriage. If my wife's love, language is 491 00:33:40,900 --> 00:33:44,200 not gifts at all. She's a minimalist, but if I am 492 00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:47,000 going to give her something, it needs to have sentimental value, 493 00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,000 it needs to have it needs to convey a story. 494 00:33:50,900 --> 00:33:53,000 Like we were just cleaning out our closet, so, you know, and 495 00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:54,900 our kids have given gifts over the. 496 00:33:54,900 --> 00:33:58,700 If she can't ever throw any of those away, can't do it. 497 00:34:01,900 --> 00:34:05,900 So these have nothing to do with gender stereotypes. 498 00:34:06,100 --> 00:34:08,400 This is hitting everybody because we're all this way. 499 00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:11,100 And every you have every one of you has a primary and a 500 00:34:11,100 --> 00:34:14,900 secondary love language. So, this is why this is such a 501 00:34:14,908 --> 00:34:17,500 big deal, ready? It's a big deal because some 502 00:34:17,500 --> 00:34:21,500 marriages are soul mates. You know what I mean by soul 503 00:34:21,500 --> 00:34:24,699 mates. It's like you would like all the 504 00:34:24,699 --> 00:34:26,900 same things. These are the people that you 505 00:34:26,900 --> 00:34:29,600 see and they like buy clothes, so they can dress alike. 506 00:34:30,300 --> 00:34:34,500 I want to throw up when I see that, but some people are that 507 00:34:34,500 --> 00:34:35,699 way. I mean, they're just so many 508 00:34:35,699 --> 00:34:37,900 say, like you say so, how are you doing in your marriage? 509 00:34:37,900 --> 00:34:41,800 Like, we don't need to talk about we never argue ever, I'm 510 00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:46,000 like boring, right? These are people that tend to 511 00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:49,800 have the same Love Languages but most marriages are Opposites 512 00:34:49,800 --> 00:34:52,000 Attract and I'm going to amend that a little bit. 513 00:34:52,100 --> 00:34:55,400 It's not necessarily opposites, its differences differences. 514 00:34:55,400 --> 00:34:59,100 Attract. And these describe different 515 00:34:59,100 --> 00:35:02,000 Love Languages so you're going to you might marry someone that 516 00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:04,800 is not at all. Like you not wired like you 517 00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,800 understands gives and receives love different than you and 518 00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:11,100 you're trying to speak love to that person in your own 519 00:35:11,100 --> 00:35:13,700 language. And it's impossible to 520 00:35:13,700 --> 00:35:15,700 understand because you're speaking two different 521 00:35:15,700 --> 00:35:18,200 languages, you're not fluent in that language and it could have 522 00:35:18,200 --> 00:35:21,400 a profound impact on your marriage relationship. 523 00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:24,800 Here again there's so much more to say about that. 524 00:35:24,900 --> 00:35:27,700 That's what Retreats your for. That's what that book is about. 525 00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:30,400 Okay, that's what five languages of love is about. 526 00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:35,100 In any case God's design, think about this, his fingerprints are 527 00:35:35,100 --> 00:35:38,100 all over these things. There is a profound spiritual 528 00:35:38,100 --> 00:35:41,400 reality to love and marriage and how it relates to an in 529 00:35:41,500 --> 00:35:46,300 experiential understanding of our relationship with Jesus. 530 00:35:46,900 --> 00:35:50,000 That's why that last scripture in Ephesians says, I'm speaking 531 00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:53,300 of Christ in the church. Because what it does, it shows 532 00:35:53,300 --> 00:35:58,000 you the physical emotional chemical and spiritual realities 533 00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:01,100 profoundly. We're going to school in a 534 00:36:01,107 --> 00:36:04,100 marriage about how we're supposed to be in relationship 535 00:36:04,100 --> 00:36:09,100 with Jesus, and it's amazing how strong your marriage can be. 536 00:36:11,100 --> 00:36:13,800 If you have a spouse where both of you are committed to each 537 00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:17,400 other with a solid spiritual Foundation, an intimate, 538 00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:19,700 personal relationship with Jesus Christ. 539 00:36:19,700 --> 00:36:23,400 You have a good understanding of how you're wired emotionally and 540 00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:28,100 physically and a realization of how much Satan is attempting to 541 00:36:28,100 --> 00:36:30,900 destroy it. You can not only have a 542 00:36:30,900 --> 00:36:34,700 successful marriage, you can have a compelling marriage. 543 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:38,800 A compelling marriage is one that other people look at and 544 00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:43,000 they're like I want that. I'd like to have a marriage like 545 00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:46,000 that. But how do you start? 546 00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:49,200 Well, I want to challenge you today. 547 00:36:50,900 --> 00:36:52,700 I want you to find a place to eat. 548 00:36:53,300 --> 00:36:54,700 Oh great. Well, that would be the end of 549 00:36:54,700 --> 00:36:56,400 that. Where would you like to go? 550 00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:57,700 I don't know. Wherever you want to go. 551 00:36:57,700 --> 00:37:03,300 Great. so, if you can survive that, I want you to ask each 552 00:37:03,300 --> 00:37:05,900 other some questions. Maybe just one question. 553 00:37:07,500 --> 00:37:09,900 Which approach did you connect with? 554 00:37:09,900 --> 00:37:13,500 Like quit telling a person about what you asked, a question, 555 00:37:13,900 --> 00:37:17,000 which one connected with you, which one of those love 556 00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:18,500 languages? Are you? 557 00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,700 Did the bill of the biblical model work with you from 558 00:37:22,700 --> 00:37:24,500 Ephesians? What about that? 559 00:37:24,500 --> 00:37:27,500 Relationship attachment model? That Jerry talked about last 560 00:37:27,500 --> 00:37:30,200 week, how about that? Start the conversation there? 561 00:37:30,200 --> 00:37:32,900 Try to guess Each Other's Love language, ask each other. 562 00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:36,600 They fit The Stereotype asked if we have things in the right 563 00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:39,900 order and the volume levels are at the right place by a book. 564 00:37:39,900 --> 00:37:42,900 Read it together, invest make it a part of your date night. 565 00:37:42,900 --> 00:37:47,000 Have a date night. Don't give up. 566 00:37:48,300 --> 00:37:52,100 Pray together. Take a step, just a step. 567 00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:57,200 Take it now. I'm going to call all of our 568 00:37:57,200 --> 00:38:00,600 campus pastors up at all of our locations because we're moving 569 00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:10,000 to a time of decision. Whether you're in this room or 570 00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:13,600 you're watching online right now, he referred to a step. 571 00:38:14,200 --> 00:38:17,300 Jerry said, take a step. Any step and I know again, I 572 00:38:17,300 --> 00:38:18,500 know what you're probably thinking. 573 00:38:18,500 --> 00:38:20,500 There's a whole bunch of different people. 574 00:38:20,500 --> 00:38:23,900 Hear different stories. You guys are in different parts 575 00:38:23,900 --> 00:38:27,300 of your life, but I'm telling you there's a step that you can 576 00:38:27,300 --> 00:38:30,200 take today that'll draw you closer to Jesus. 577 00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:33,300 Let me just talk to you to the first group of people in here. 578 00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:35,800 There's a group of people in here. 579 00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:40,500 You've been searching for true. Love You've been, you've been 580 00:38:40,500 --> 00:38:43,700 searching for peace. You've been searching for 581 00:38:43,700 --> 00:38:46,400 acceptance and you've been trying to find that in a person. 582 00:38:47,300 --> 00:38:52,500 And I want you to know that today, in this moment, you can 583 00:38:52,500 --> 00:38:55,600 find that inside, an intimate personal relationship with Jesus 584 00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:59,900 Christ. Jesus, absolutely, adores. 585 00:38:59,900 --> 00:39:04,600 You loves you cares for you. Accepts you and it doesn't 586 00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:07,000 matter what you've done. It doesn't matter what you did 587 00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:08,900 right before you came into this church. 588 00:39:10,300 --> 00:39:13,700 He looks at you and he says you are mine. 589 00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:17,000 He shows us. What love is a love that we 590 00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:22,600 definitely don't deserve. And he says you can have it and 591 00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:24,800 you can you can claim that true today. 592 00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:29,000 You can leave here today. Stop searching the world to find 593 00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:31,600 it because it's found in a relationship with Jesus. 594 00:39:31,600 --> 00:39:34,700 If you never started it, you've never experienced true love 595 00:39:34,700 --> 00:39:41,000 before but you can today Just call on the name of Jesus, just 596 00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:42,500 a little bit. There's going to be some one 597 00:39:42,500 --> 00:39:44,200 right over here. One of our pastors, right by the 598 00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:47,200 baptistry and they love to help you make that step of Faith. 599 00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:50,000 There's actually one person taken that step, today, you 600 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:54,300 wouldn't be alone. You can say, I believe I submit 601 00:39:54,300 --> 00:39:57,600 my life to Christ and you can experience that true love today. 602 00:39:57,600 --> 00:39:59,500 If you're online you can simply just type in. 603 00:39:59,500 --> 00:40:02,000 I'm ready and a chat host. Would love to help walk you 604 00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:05,500 through what it looks like to walk in that relationship with 605 00:40:05,500 --> 00:40:08,200 him. And I would encourage you to 606 00:40:08,207 --> 00:40:10,300 that's the very best step you could take today. 607 00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:14,400 The next group of people may not want to talk to is if you're 608 00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:16,100 married in this room. Listen, if you're not, I'm going 609 00:40:16,100 --> 00:40:19,300 to get back to you in just a bit, but if you're married and 610 00:40:19,300 --> 00:40:23,000 your step is, we made it an intentional step for you to take 611 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,500 today up here at our steps. And if you're online, you can 612 00:40:26,500 --> 00:40:28,500 just go to the crossing dotnet forward, slash family, and 613 00:40:28,500 --> 00:40:31,900 you'll find this. But up here is a packet and 614 00:40:31,900 --> 00:40:33,900 maybe your first step in just a little bit. 615 00:40:33,900 --> 00:40:36,800 When the music starts is just to take your spouse by their hand, 616 00:40:37,400 --> 00:40:40,300 walk up to the steps, grab one of these, get on your knees and 617 00:40:40,300 --> 00:40:43,700 pray over it. And what's inside of this is 618 00:40:44,100 --> 00:40:46,300 going to help you succeed in a date night. 619 00:40:47,500 --> 00:40:50,500 There's eight different cards that you would open on this one 620 00:40:50,500 --> 00:40:52,300 night and you just go through it. 621 00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:56,300 The first one like Jerry said is just picking a spot to go eat 622 00:40:56,700 --> 00:41:00,200 and then it will progress throughout dinner this may be a 623 00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:03,500 tool that can turn your marriage around. 624 00:41:03,700 --> 00:41:06,700 It could be a tool that continues to invest in your 625 00:41:06,700 --> 00:41:08,500 marriage to keep it going strong. 626 00:41:08,500 --> 00:41:11,100 I don't know where you're at but I believe, man, if we can do 627 00:41:11,100 --> 00:41:14,100 this as a church and we can get serious about taking a step. 628 00:41:14,900 --> 00:41:17,100 What can what can God do through that? 629 00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:20,800 I can't wait to find out all the married couples and just a 630 00:41:20,808 --> 00:41:22,200 little bit. When you come forward and you 631 00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:22,900 pray. Listen. 632 00:41:22,900 --> 00:41:25,100 And some of you, your spouse's are not sitting next to you. 633 00:41:26,100 --> 00:41:28,700 Maybe your step is coming to grab one of these and praying 634 00:41:28,700 --> 00:41:31,400 for your spouse by name, getting on your knees, humbling 635 00:41:31,400 --> 00:41:33,600 yourself. And just saying, Lord, I don't 636 00:41:33,600 --> 00:41:36,200 know how he or. She will take this, but I'm 637 00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:38,500 going to take this challenge as well, and you can have some 638 00:41:38,500 --> 00:41:42,300 incredible incredible conversations over dinner. 639 00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:47,100 But maybe you're not married. Here's what I want you to know. 640 00:41:47,100 --> 00:41:51,800 Listen, this actually can be for you too, because you have 641 00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:55,000 relationships. Some of you, grandparents, you 642 00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:58,200 have a son or a daughter or grandchild. 643 00:41:58,200 --> 00:42:00,900 You can take to dinner. You could take one of these 644 00:42:00,900 --> 00:42:03,900 challenges inside of it, and just replace the word spouse and 645 00:42:03,900 --> 00:42:07,100 just invest in that relationship. 646 00:42:07,900 --> 00:42:10,300 God can take a lot of ground in that relationship. 647 00:42:10,300 --> 00:42:13,000 And you know, I think those five love languages, you can actually 648 00:42:13,000 --> 00:42:15,300 accomplish all five over this date. 649 00:42:15,900 --> 00:42:18,600 If you think about it all five of them can be fulfilled. 650 00:42:18,600 --> 00:42:22,100 And just this one time where you get together with your spouse 651 00:42:22,400 --> 00:42:31,100 your loved one, your friend. but as always, you could here's an 652 00:42:31,100 --> 00:42:36,000 option and we start singing, you could just stay still, you could 653 00:42:37,100 --> 00:42:40,400 You could just say, man. That's our marriage is good or 654 00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:44,400 our marriage has passed help. We can't we can't do anything 655 00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:47,600 else. You could just say I'm good, but 656 00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:49,600 I believe we're a church. That moves I believe. 657 00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:52,100 We're a church that just wants to take these steps and here's 658 00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:55,200 what we want to do. We want to move out of our seats 659 00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:57,200 and let God do what only God can do. 660 00:42:57,200 --> 00:42:59,600 So I hope you're with me. Let's stand to our feet and 661 00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:03,300 let's just give God all of this right now in this moment. 662 00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:07,400 Let's take a step, Heavenly Father, you are our Firm 663 00:43:07,400 --> 00:43:11,600 Foundation. You are our Solid Rock all other 664 00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:15,900 ground is sinking sand. So God in this moment we just 665 00:43:15,900 --> 00:43:19,000 offer up whatever relationship. We need to offer up in this 666 00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:21,000 moment. Got a pizza, a marriage. 667 00:43:21,700 --> 00:43:24,700 I pray for those spouses God that they would, they would 668 00:43:24,700 --> 00:43:27,200 relate to what you say, in your word. 669 00:43:27,900 --> 00:43:30,200 Some of these incredible resources that we talked about 670 00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:34,100 today, but God, I pray, that the spouse would take a step today. 671 00:43:35,400 --> 00:43:39,000 That marriages would be restored and healed today. 672 00:43:39,500 --> 00:43:44,500 In your name, Jesus, you can do even more than we ask or imagine 673 00:43:45,100 --> 00:43:47,700 Lord, if it's a relationship that just needs investment in. 674 00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:50,600 I pray that you do. What that, what you can do in 675 00:43:50,600 --> 00:43:52,500 that and that relationship, Lord. 676 00:43:52,900 --> 00:43:56,500 But as we sing these songs, I pray that we're a church, that 677 00:43:56,500 --> 00:44:00,200 moves a church. That responds a church is 678 00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:03,600 saying, I'm not. Okay, with where I came in at, I 679 00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:06,500 want to draw closer. Sir, to you and invest in these 680 00:44:06,500 --> 00:44:07,900 relationships. Oh God. 681 00:44:08,400 --> 00:44:10,700 Let us be a church. That moves in Jesus name. 682 00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:11,500 Amen.