Well, good morning, Crossing Church.
How are you doing today? It is so good to see all your
smiling faces and realize that God's just doing incredible work
in your lives and through your lives and through your lives.
God's changing a lot of other lives.
And I'm just so thankful. And you just look good.
You know, I mean, just turn to your neighbor and go.
You look, you're looking good today.
Yeah, Yeah, it's not. Yeah, it's nice.
Good. Yeah.
All right. I want to welcome all of our
locations, all 12 of them, like the apostles, you know, like the
tribes of Israel. 12 locations. That's just absolutely amazing.
So thankful for each and everyone of you that are joining
with us, Everyone that's inside, everyone that's online.
And we're in a series about raising children.
If you're wondering why Allison is sitting behind me, we
actually need someone to talk to us who knows what they're
talking about. And that's why she's up here
because I'll just fake it until I make it.
But she actually lives it out in her life.
And if if you've been around us or heard me speak before, we've
talked a lot about our marriage. We are not necessarily the
marriage we want other people to try to identify with or be like.
It's just our marriage, just like every other marriage that's
represented in all of our rooms. But we are definitely the
classic opposites attract marriage.
Totally. Totally right, and nowhere is
that more potentially good or bad than in how we raise our
children. As we learned early on, even in
our dating life, we learned this in our dating life, is that we
have a choice of looking at that opposites attracting 2 different
ways. One is you're so ignorant, you
know, and I'm using the best word right there.
Yeah, yeah. Rather than all the other words
I've used in the past or you used in the past.
I know I do it more. Or this you see things in a way
I could never see them see. People that are attracted to
each other because they're opposites attract.
What they're looking for is someone to complete all the
voids that are in their life that they can't seem to complete
on their own. And they admire the things that
they don't possess and they want somebody else that does possess
those things to fill their lives up in those in those places.
So we're really not what you would call soul mates.
We are definitely opposites attract, but if you can capture,
let me tell you, that's been an evolution for both of us.
If you can capture, you see things in a way that I can't.
That has been an incredible benefit to our marriage and it's
an incredible benefit for our family.
Would you welcome Allison as she speaks to you today?
Thank you. Let me describe how that works
in our life. And then we're not the, we're
not the example. We're just, it's just an option
for us. This is our differences.
I was the day-to-day nurturer. I was the one to make sure the
lunch box was full. What did you eat from your lunch
box? Are your socks matching?
Is your shirt right side out? Is your homework in your book
bag? You know, what's the drama at
the junior high? Who's doing what at the high
school? I was the day-to-day person.
Jerry was the crisis intervention.
You have a drama. We have a trauma in our life and
Jerry was the one that said you and I in the car were going out
to eat and that usually meant there was some kind of big life
discussion you were going to have.
I the second one, I don't care. I still don't care.
I didn't care then if the house was total trash.
If you're having fun, I taught the preschool for 30 some odd
years. I that just stuff doesn't even
phase me. If you're having fun, if you're
creating memories, if you're laughing, I'm all about it.
Jerry likes a little more structure and organization.
I was more the grace giver and he was more the truth teller.
I was calm in the crisis moment and then I would freak out
later. He was less than calm in the
moment, but very wise in reflection.
I. Did I did?
Why, Yeah. Every other time, every other
time, we've done this two other times, right?
And she would and she would say, you know, I would.
I was in the moment, I was like this, you know, monster, but but
later on, but she wouldn't go later on.
They've got later on as well, you know, just just kind of as a
matter of fact. And I'm like, hey, that's come
on, you need to emphasize that too.
But I'll tell you, we've learned so much just being parents
because where did we learn how? Where did we learn how to raise
our children? Where did we learn how to love
them in a way that would honor God and hopefully get them to
honor God, right? Well, we learned in the same
place where you learned because we all learn in exactly the same
place the way that we were raised.
That's the only example that we really have, right?
Our parents or parent or grandparent or grandparents or
foster parents. It was those people that that
spoke into our lives. And it, it's in that reality
that we learn how to be parents. Now, don't get me wrong on this.
I'm not saying that we learned all the good things from the way
that we were raised, because the truth of the matter is we learn
a lot of bad things from the way that we're raised, right?
Things that we don't want to repeat.
As a matter of fact, we're rejecting them.
You know, if you, if maybe your father, your mother was a
corporal discipline punishment type person, maybe you're more
of a love and logic parent, right?
Because you don't you, you don't want to repeat that you don't
like certain ways that you were raised.
And so you reject those things and other things are the ones
that you might emphasize. And so we kind of cobble our own
idea of what parenting is from whatever has been poured into
us. But wouldn't you like something
else? Wouldn't you like something else
that's maybe a little better, a little pure to inform how you're
going to be a parent? Where do I get a gold standard
for that? Oh, I'll just read the Bible,
and if I read the Bible and I look at the examples in the
Bible and I try to emulate those examples in the Bible, then I'm
going to be a much better parent, right?
Wrong. You couldn't be more wrong.
I challenge you to go into God's word.
I don't care. Old Testament, New Testament and
find me examples of great parenting.
What you're actually going to find is the exact opposite of
that because the Bible does not pull any punches in this area.
And what you do is you get to look behind the curtain, behind
the scenes into these family lives and you realize just how
absolutely messed up parents are in the Bible.
So Allison and I are like racking our brains and we're
working on this sermon. Like let's find a good Printal
example. And so, you know, Allison after
some time goes, well, there's Mary and Joseph and I'm like,
well, there's how much is really written about Joseph as a
parent. I mean, a couple of lines and
then he's gone. And then she said, well, maybe
Zechariah and Elizabeth John the Baptist parents.
Well, same kind of thing. So either there's an absence of
teaching or it's all on the negative side, negative
teaching. What do I learn from that?
The Bible is telling me just how hard it is to do this job.
Some of you right now, you're at your wit's end.
Some of you right now look in the in the rearview mirror of
your life and you see your wit's end way back there.
And whatever it is that you're doing now is beyond you're
really your ability to understand.
I'm a father of four, a grandfather of five, soon to be
7. And this is what I can tell you
with absolute authority. Parenting is a place where so
many of your dreams come true, as well as some of your worst
nightmares. Amen, Allison.
There's nothing that builds our prayer life faster than raising
children. Agree.
I have a cabinet in my house and has prayer journals in it and
they're nothing fancy. They're Walmart $0.99 or
actually $0.10 if you go at the right time of year.
And I just, you know, I just write and I have stacks of them
and one of these days I'm going to get them all out and I'm
going to light them on fire because for two reasons, 1, I
don't want my kids reading after I'm dead.
What I said about them in my prayer journal, number one.
Number two, I want to offer them up as a incense to the Lord
going. I cannot parent unless you do it
with me. Actually, if you do it for me,
because he is the best parent. Preach Now most of us we love
our children. It's instinctive that we love
our children but we always we might struggle in how we love
our children. And God in his infinite wisdom
did not give us clones for children, although we wished you
would have at times. We usually have children that
are unique in personality and same with our grandchildren.
So how do we do that? Well, over the years, Jerry and
I have done some marriage counseling and some marriage
enrichment seminars, and we use a very basic book by Gary
Chapman called The Five Love Languages, Super cheap on
Amazon, easy read, nothing hard. They also have one called The
Five Love Languages of Children. So we're going to go through
five of them or I'm going to go through five of them quickly,
but I'm going to add some scripture in here because this
is the source. Besides your prayer life, this
is your source. All right #1 words of
affirmation. That's comes from Luke 19, one
through 10. And it's the story of Zacchaeus.
Now, we, some of us grew up knowing that.
And some of us, this is a news story.
Zacchaeus was a Jewish man who had no friends.
He was a Jew by blood, but he was ostracized by his people
because he sold out and became a tax collector for the Romans.
So the Romans saw him as a pawn and the Jews saw him as a sell
out, no friends. And then one day here comes
Jesus and he's looks at right at Zacchaeus in a group of people.
He says, I'm coming to your house today.
Now in our in our culture, we're like going, yeah, whatever, OK,
no problem. In that culture, that was a big
deal and a big honor. So immediately Zacchaeus goes
from this till he stands up a little bit more and then Jesus
drops the awesome bomb and he says salvation has come to your
house today. And then Zacchaeus has a whole
new purpose in life, because he got the words of affirmation
from Jesus. Next, one quality time,
Deuteronomy 6 four through 6 says this.
Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is 1 Love the Lord
your God with all your heart and all your soul with all your
strength. These commandments I give you
today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children.
Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the
road and when you lie down and when you get up.
Jerry has a great story on this one.
So last week we weren't here because I'm from Indianapolis,
particularly Speedway, Indiana, and I don't miss the Indy 500.
So I was at the Indy 500 and it's it's become an event for
our family. And so we we go, we do that, we
stay with friends, eat great food.
But one of the highlights of this trip is on Monday, because
Monday is actually Memorial Day. And we stay with these friends
in this, in this rural, it's, it's a very rural community.
And there's a, a cemetery there. And what this friend of mine has
done is he's made the Memorial Day service in that cemetery a
very big deal for his family and for the immediate people around.
And so the VFW comes and they shoot their guns and they play
taps and there's words that are said in honor of those people
who offered their lives and gave their lives for our freedom and
for our country. It's fun to watch the children
because you know, when they shoot their guns, the brass
comes out and they go pull the kids get to police the brass and
take that home as a souvenir. And so we're arriving as a
family to that cemetery and, and I'm with my three-year old now.
Listen to me. Quality time doesn't have to be
a lot of time. It has to be captured time like
where you make the most of a moment or a series of moments
and you have to be able to be listening for that or looking
for that opportunity. So this 3 year old is walking in
the cemetery. I'm holding his hand and he's
wondering what he's seeing. He could have been in a cemetery
the year before and wouldn't have wondered that.
But now he's wondering that he sees all these stones and all
these names on these stones. And he starts asking me what
that is. And I'm sensing a teaching
moment of a moment of quality time.
And over to my right is a big Blackstone with the name Leon
Tippin on it. And I knew Leon Tippin well and
the kind of life that he led and his faith in Jesus Christ.
And so I, I just told my 3 year old grandson, I go, well, this
is Leon Tippin where he was buried.
And he was trying to understand buried and understand the idea
of dying. And I said, well, you know, he
died, but he was a, a Christian and he went to heaven, but they
buried his body right there. And that's his name up there.
And I mean, just as serious as he could be.
He looked at me and he said, I mean, he just had a sad look on
his face. And he goes, did did monsters
get him? And I went, no, no, monsters
didn't get him. He just got old.
And then he got sick. And then he died and God took
him home. And then this is what we do with
the body. Well, then we, as we walked
further into that cemetery, he wanted to know the name of every
stone there. And the same question, did
monsters get her? Did monsters get them?
And I had to keep saying, no, there were no monsters, you
know. But it was it's an illustration
of just taking a moment and being able to teach a life
lesson that may become a core memory, even for a three-year
old, by loving them through quality time.
So the next one is Acts of Service and we get this one from
Matthew 2028 and it says the man of the Son of man did not come
to be served, but to serve. And the Son of man here is
Jesus. I love to be a helper.
I am A2 on the Enneagram. I, I like to help.
It's my, I just like to do it. And when my kids were small, I
would do it. And as they got older, I would
do it. And even if in that in high
school when I get a phone call at 7:40 in the morning and they
forgot this and this and this and that has to be signed by
this and I need money for that. I mean, I am there, man.
I am mom points of the day. I am acts of serving.
I am serving them. And then I had a problem and
Jerry was very good to point this out to me and he was
totally right. I have to learn.
So I will give this advice to you.
If you're a service person and you love to and your kids want
acts of service, great. Understand the line between
serving and enabling. And Jerry would be very good to
tell me, let them fall because you need to teach them the
skills of how to get back up. That was a hard one.
That's so true. The next one, gifts.
This is from Luke 11. Which of your Father's?
If your son asks for a fish, we'll give him a snake instead,
or if he asks for an egg, we'll give him a scorpion.
If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good
gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven
give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him?
If your child's love language is gifts, it doesn't always have to
be tangible things. In fact, it shouldn't because
you don't want to have them be a materialist and equate gifts.
Teach them the Holy Spirit. He is the best gift.
The next one, physical touch, the last one, physical touch.
And this one is Luke 843. This is the woman with the issue
of blood. Now how am I going to attach
that with physical touch? Several years ago we took a
group to Israel and we went to the church Catholic Church in
Magdala. And in the basement of this
church is a mural that is probably the size of the stage
at 48th St. and you'll see it. There's will be a picture on the
wall. This picture blew my mind and I
wanted to share it with you. If you'll see over here, you'll
see a woman and we don't know the age of the woman.
This picture to picture is a little older because you can see
by her hands, but she had an issue of blood.
She was unclean in that culture for 12 years.
That means she cannot be touched nor can she touch anybody.
God made touch as an instinct, and in this picture, she cannot
touch and she cannot be touched. She's ostracized.
So in this picture, it depicts her crawling on the ground.
Loke had the difference between her hand and the feet.
She's crawling hoping that nobody will see her, because if
they see her, they'll cast her out.
And she's trying to get to the hem of his garment.
And he even stops and says the power has come out of me.
And she has received healing from Jesus because of physical
touch. That's how important it is.
All five of those languages are so critical, and what we learn
when in Gary Chapman's book is that.
You try to understand that love language of the other person,
learn to speak in that love language gives us the
responsibility like in marriages, like there's a
primary and maybe a secondary because who can love in all 5
languages? You know, we, we, we just really
can't do that. And I really haven't answered my
own question yet. Where do I find another example
besides the parenting that I experienced growing up or that
Allison experienced growing up? And I'm going to answer that
question right now because the greatest example of parenting is
God himself. And there is no replacement for
it. Sometimes I think the reason
that God told the truth about all these human parents is to
show us how far away we are from the the idea of perfect
parenting. And there's a story in the Bible
that Jesus gives us that illustrates what we mean by
perfect parenting. It's the third in a trilogy.
So Jesus tells 3 parables. The first one is about a lost
sheep. So there's 100 sheep, one gets
lost. The shepherd goes out and finds
the one lost sheep, one out of 100.
The second story he tells is about a woman who had 10 coins,
and one of those coins is lost in the house, and she finds that
lost coin. So it's one out of 10.
The final story, the conclusion of these parables, is the
parable of the lost son, one out of two sons.
And it's the most poignant story, and I want to read it to
you. And while I'm reading it, I want
you to think what love languages are illustrated in this story?
Jesus continued. There was a man who had two
sons. The younger one said to his
father, Father, give me my share of the estate.
So we divided his property between them.
Not long after that the younger son got together all he had set
off for a distant country and their squandered his wealth on
wild living. After he'd spent everything,
there was a severe famine in that whole country and it began
to be in need. So he went and hired himself out
to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to
feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach
with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him
anything. When he came to his senses, he
said, How many of my father's hired servants have food to
spare? And here I am, starving to
death. I will sit out and go back to my
father and say to him, Father, I've sinned against heaven and
against you. I am no longer worthy to be
called your son. Make me like one of your hired
servants. So we got up and went to his
father, but while he was still a long way off, his father saw him
and was filled with compassion for him, and ran to his son
through his arms around him and kissed him.
The son said to him, Father, I've sinned against heaven and
against you, I'm no longer worthy to be called your son.
But the father said to his servants, Quick, bring the best
robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and
sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill
it. Let's have a feast and
celebrate, for this son of mine was dead and is alive again.
He was lost and is found. So they began to celebrate.
Meanwhile the older son was in the field and when he came near
to the house, he heard music and dancing.
So he called one of the servants and ask him what was going on.
Your brother has come, he replied.
Your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him
back safe and sound. The older brother became angry
and refused to go in, so his father went out and pleaded with
him, but he answered his father. Look, all these years I've been
slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders, yet you
never gave me even a young goat so I can celebrate with my
friends. But when this son of yours, who
has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you
kill the fattened calf for him. My son, the father said you're
always with me and everything I have is yours.
But we had to celebrate and be glad because this brother of
yours was dead and is alive again.
He was lost and is found. Did you see the love languages
in it, all five of them beautifully displayed?
We see gifts. We see the gift of the early
release of the inheritance to the younger son, which the
father was not required to do. We see the giving of a robe and
you notice what it says, the best robe, the giving of a ring,
which is a signet ring, which means he's part of the family,
and sandals for his feet. Because when he came over that
hill, no one would have recognized him but a father.
He would have been so dirty and disheveled.
We see physical touch, this picture of the father running to
his son, and it says that when he was still a long way off,
which means what? Before he ever saw his son, he
was looking for his son. He had his eyes on the horizon,
believing that his son would return.
And then he runs. The only time God has ever
pictured as running. And look who he's running to.
A prodigal son. Then we see him embracing his
son, kissing his son, physical touch.
We see words of affirmation. We see it in the declaration of
the father to his son in front of these servants.
My son was dead. He's alive again.
He was lost, but he's found. He says that two times.
We see acts of service in the party preparation, We see acts
of service in him running interference with the older
brother who's jealous of the younger brother, solving that
problem so that the younger brother doesn't have to.
And then we see quality time in the party itself.
And in the captured moments, you see only one Father, only one
parent does parenting perfectly, and that's our Heavenly Father.
Now, sometimes we've had bad experiences with our parents,
and we want to transfer that onto our Heavenly Father.
But that's not right because our Heavenly Father is perfect in
all He does. And when you believe in Him and
have an intimate, personal relationship with Him, you can
claim Him as your Father, Allison.
But what's some of the best ways that we can walk out these five
love languages? And that's with faith.
In Luke 8, we see Gyrus. And Gyrus is the chief of the
synagogue. So he's he is a Jewish leader
and he is has high reputation and he makes pretty good money
and he's very important. And he's not probably as to be
chief of the synagogue, you have to be pretty educated.
But his daughter's sick. And in Luke 8, you see that it
does not matter any of that. When his daughter's sick, she's
sick enough that he is willing to do whatever it takes that he
comes to find this rebel teacher named Jesus.
He's risking his reputation, his income, his his power within the
community to find a healer for his daughter.
He has faith in Jesus. We also see with the boy and the
fish and the loaves. It was probably his only meal of
the day and he hands it to Jesus willingly.
He has faith that Jesus will do what he says he will do.
In Acts 12, we see Rhoda, who is a younger girl, not a child, but
not a woman, and she's answering the door when she hears a knock.
Well, she's been here in the other room with all these other
adults, and they're praying for Peter, that he would be
delivered, that he would be set free.
And all of a sudden there's a knock on the door, and Rhoda
goes to answer it, knowing it's Jesus.
It's not Jesus, it's Peter, and Peter is there.
She has faith that Jesus answered her prayer, and Peter
was there. I've been personally, I have
been doing children's ministry for a really long time, whether
it be lay ministry or as a staff person or in leadership.
And I love being in this room. I love being at all the campuses
in your auditorium. I love playing on the stage.
I've loved watching him preach for 42 years, but can I tell you
that the Holy Spirit moves mightily and happily in the
lives of what's happening in the back of the building?
In children's ministry, He is delighted.
With your children, you may be exhausted.
He is delighted. He is delighted in our
preschools, he is delighted in our camp, he is delighted in our
children's ministry. And if you serve in those areas,
he is delighted with you. Be mindful, parents of the lower
story, that it's exhausting. I know it's exhausting, but he
loves his children and he smiles on them.
He you are his child, and your children are his child.
So when I'm getting ready to preach a sermon and I know what
the topic is going to be, I just put my radar up.
You know, I'm just like, God, what do you have?
What are you going to show me? And I start looking for those
things. So two weeks ago I was in this
room at 48th St. listening to Clayton preach, and I was really
enjoying the sermon. And I would imagine there's been
times when you've been enjoying a sermon and then there is a
young person near you somewhere and they start making some noise
or talking and then all of a sudden, you know, you kind of
get disconnected. And, and so there was a young
man that, or a boy that was across the aisle from us and I
can hear him talking. I couldn't hear what he was
saying, but he was talking a little bit loud.
And so like, my default is to be a little frustrated with that.
And I'm looking over there, right?
And I see a family of four and the, the dad and the mom sitting
together, dad's on the end and then a daughter and then the son
on the other end, right? And the son's talking over the
other two, the the sister and the mom to talk to the dad.
I can't hear what they're saying, but I'm just kind of
watching that. And I saw the dad get up.
I mean, stand up during the sermon, walk in the aisle or
the, the row behind and come around and sit by the sun.
I'm going, oh, oh, something's going to happen.
You know, it's going to be some discipline here.
I could have been farther from the truth.
This is this is something that God was going to show me that
God was going to teach me. So he sits down next to his son
and it what plays out in front of me is exactly what the
discussion was about. He gets the Bible from his son.
His Bible has his son has a paper Bible and he takes the
Bible from his son and he opens to the table of contents and
he's finding the passage of Scripture that Clayton is
preaching from. And he finds the page number.
He goes to that book, finds the chapter, finds the verse.
And then the Father and the Son hold the Bible together while
the while the father moves his finger along the sentences, the
lines that Clayton is saying. And I went, that's it.
That's how difficult it is. That's how simple it is.
That's what it means to be a godly parent, something as
simple as that. And I remember sitting there and
I and you saw it too. We were watching it together.
And I'm kind of and you're, you're, you're going, yeah, I
already saw that. And it's like, wow, cuz she
probably knows what was going on my mind ahead of that.
Anyway, I thought that. Thank you, Lord, that's, that's
great. That's done.
No, he wasn't done. Later on in that same service,
we get to the worship time, the second worship time after the
sermon, right? And they're standing together
and I hear that kids voice again and he's talking to his dad
again. And I see the dad doesn't have
to stand up. He's already standing, does the
same thing, walks around to the row behind him, comes over the
other side, and then stands by his son and start singing loudly
so his son can hear him. And the son is hearing his
father worship and praise God. And the son's hands go up in the
air to worship. Hold on, hold on.
And the father sees the son's hands go up in worship.
So his hands go up in worship. And then I'm going now that's
really it, right? So here's the Son being an
example to the Father, while the Father is being a teacher to his
Son. And you know, if you're looking
in the table of contents, you're not a theologian, But do you
think God cares about that? Or do you think what God cares
about is a father and a son making a moment, a memory in a
moment, probably a core memory of what it means to be a godly
parent and embrace that responsibility?
That's what it really is, that we're moving to a time of
decision. This is the part that I don't
really like to do, but I'm compelled to do it.
And that is, you know, you might have liked what we had to say.
You might have liked what I had to say, but I want you to know
something. You've heard me say this before.
How many of you have heard in church that church is full of
hypocrites? Raise your hand if you've heard
that before, right? And you've probably heard me say
before if you've been attending a while and I'm the biggest one
in the room because I'm the guy telling you how to live your
life and then I go home struggling to live mine.
Where do I get off telling you that stuff, right?
Well, there's nowhere that that hypocrisy hits me harder than in
parenting, because I have constantly feeling my inadequacy
when my temper gets the best of me, when I don't give the best
answers, when my adult children tell me the damage that I did to
them when they were kids, that kind of stuff.
And it's hard and it hurts. And I want to make excuses for
myself. Why do you think I asked Allison
immediately to preach this sermon with me?
Because I needed a designated hitter.
I needed somebody who was like, actually really good at
parenting. That's the way I view it.
But I can tell you this, Allison is back there playing right now,
will be the first person to come up and say, well, Jerry, I
appreciate that, but I'm just as big a hypocrite as you are.
All of us want Jesus to be our savior.
Why do we want Him to be our Savior?
Because you all have a past, like me.
You all have regrets, choices that you wish you could have do
overs on, but you can't. Because you can't roll the clock
back. And so that haunts you.
It hangs with you. I need a savior.
I need to be saved from that. You know what?
Being saved from your past, that's just not good enough,
right? Because you don't just need to
be safe from your past. You need to be safe from today,
and you need to be saved from the days you haven't even lived
yet. Aren't you glad that you have a
savior that lives in all three tenses at the same time, that he
can save to that extent? Great.
But that's not all I need. I'm a lot more needy than that.
I don't just need a savior. I need a Lord.
And the reason I need a Lord is because I don't do this right on
my best day. I'm still making things up as I
go, you know, as a grandparent now, as a parent of adult
children now. And I need somebody to tell me
if I'm doing it right or wrong or making an adjustment.
Help me to do that. So I need a Lord in my life that
speaks into my life and into my heart on a regular basis because
I'm still not good enough. But that's OK because I have
one. I have a Savior and I have a
Lord and someday He's going to complete it.
And what He does is always right.
If you're here and you don't have an intimate personal
relationship with Jesus Christ, what the heck is wrong with you?
You can't do this by yourself. Nobody can.
You can't do this even in a good marriage if it's not a Christ
centered marriage. You can't do this without God.
You can't do this without Jesus. And it isn't about having
religion or going to church. It's about having a relationship
with Jesus Christ, to know that he's there every moment and to
know that he is like what we've sung in the past, a good, good
father. He's a father who doesn't use
guilt. Did you know that?
He uses conviction? Human beings get really confused
between those two things. Guilt means a father saying to
son or daughter, I'm ashamed of you.
Conviction is a father saying to a son or daughter, this is not
acceptable behavior and you and I are going to work this out and
I am not leaving. I'm not moving until we get this
right together because I love you that much.
You want to hear the dumbest word in relationships,
particularly in parenting. Here's the dumbest word,
tolerance. When has love ever been
tolerant? You know, your, your, your child
comes home with grade with, with grades from school and there's
3DS and 2FS. How tolerant are you of that?
Well, not if you love them. Because if you love them, you
want them to do better, right? And if you want them to do
better, you have to be willing to put in the time and say,
we're going to figure this out together.
I'm not going to just guilt you and tell you this is a lousy
report card. I'm going to say, let's work on
this. Let's do it together, right?
True love is intolerant because it wants the best for each other
in a in a marriage, in in, in, in parenting, in every walk of
life. That's what love is.
It's not selfish if you don't have an intimate, personal
relationship with Jesus Christ. You don't have the tools that
are necessary for you to be the parent God wants you to be.
There's going to be somebody right over there by the
baptistry that would love nothing more than to pray with
you. They don't have, they're not any
smarter than you. They just have the answer in
Jesus Christ and they would like to pray with you and help
shepherd you down that road because the person leading you
down that road isn't them. It's Jesus himself because he's
here in this room right now. If you've never come to Jesus,
you can do it right now. If you have come to Jesus,
you're in a relationship with Jesus.
Well, then you got it all figured out, right?
You're a great parent. Everything's going perfect.
It's been going perfect. It's going to continue to go
perfect. Right now.
Everybody that's here in the sermon needs to be up here on
their knees if they're a parent or if you're planning on being
one someday. You know why you're critiquing
everybody else. God help me.
God be my savior. God be my Lord.
Jesus shepherd me. This is your opportunity.
Would you stand with me? Let's pray together.
Heavenly Father, in Jesus name. Take this moment.
It's a sacred moment because you're here and your children
are here and I just pray, Father, that right now you would
speak into the hearts of your children and that we would move
together, not as the best children ever, prodigal's all,
but that we would just go to our Father and see the perfect
example and feel the embrace of his love in Jesus name, Amen.