1
00:00:00,800 --> 00:00:03,480
Oh, crossing family. 
I love you. 

2
00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:07,080
And I am so excited for the gift
that we have in store for you 

3
00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:11,040
this weekend. 
Steve Poe is the legacy pastor 

4
00:00:11,040 --> 00:00:13,720
of Northview Church in Central 
IN. 

5
00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:17,200
He's been a restauranteur, an 
entrepreneur, a financial 

6
00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:20,760
planner, a radio station owner 
and operator, a commodity 

7
00:00:20,760 --> 00:00:22,800
trader. 
But then he decided to give the 

8
00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:25,960
last 20 years of his life to 
being the lead pastor of 

9
00:00:25,960 --> 00:00:28,840
Northview Church. 
And in those twenty years, that 

10
00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:31,760
church grew from 500 people to 
over 10,000. 

11
00:00:32,119 --> 00:00:35,560
He did this alongside of his 
wife and best friend Sandy. 

12
00:00:35,840 --> 00:00:40,920
He is respected all across this 
nation as a good man and a 

13
00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:43,920
follower of Jesus and a 
Christian leader. 

14
00:00:44,480 --> 00:00:47,840
He's a pastor's pastor and he is
here this weekend. 

15
00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:51,320
Share with us as we've been 
learning from his book that he's

16
00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:53,720
the author of Creatures of 
Habit. 

17
00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:57,320
So crossing family, Would you 
put a warm crossing welcome 

18
00:00:57,320 --> 00:01:01,240
together for our friend and our 
preacher this weekend, Steve 

19
00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:08,320
Poe? 
Well, thank you, Crossing. 

20
00:01:08,320 --> 00:01:11,120
Good morning. 
We'll try it again. 

21
00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:12,800
Thank you, Crossing. 
Good morning. 

22
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:16,680
Hey, it is so good to be here. 
I've looked forward to this for 

23
00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:18,880
a long time. 
As Clayton said, I'm Steve Poe. 

24
00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:23,200
I pastored in Northview Church 
for over 23 years, and I've been

25
00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:26,240
friends with Jerry and Allison 
for over a decade. 

26
00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:29,920
And they're just special people.
They're the real deal. 

27
00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:32,000
I really don't know how much 
more I could say about that. 

28
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,920
And I'm just getting to know 
Clayton and Jenny, and they're 

29
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:37,720
very special as well. 
And you guys as a church are 

30
00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:42,880
fortunate to have had two great 
pastors, men of integrity, 

31
00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:46,600
strong leaders, men that not 
only love God, they love you. 

32
00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:50,040
And so you're fortunate as a 
church. 

33
00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:53,640
Pray with me, Father. 
Thank you for your faithfulness.

34
00:01:53,640 --> 00:01:56,360
What an incredible opportunity 
it is to be able to gather 

35
00:01:56,360 --> 00:01:58,760
together and to worship you in 
spirit and truth. 

36
00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:01,200
God, we have sensed your 
presence in this place. 

37
00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:04,480
And I pray, Lord, that as we get
into your word this morning, 

38
00:02:04,480 --> 00:02:07,880
that you would just challenge 
us, stir our hearts, open up our

39
00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:10,560
eyes and ears to see and hear 
all that you want to do in our 

40
00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:11,840
life. 
Thanks God. 

41
00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:14,720
We love you and we praise you. 
We ask you in the name of Jesus.

42
00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:18,600
Amen. 
So I grew up in a middle class 

43
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:21,880
home with parents that 
absolutely loved me, and yet I 

44
00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:24,440
had a father with a whole lot of
unresolved anger. 

45
00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:27,400
I never quite knew when he was 
going to blow or what it might 

46
00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:30,120
be that would set him off. 
It could be anything from a 

47
00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:32,840
teenager driving down the road 
too fast. 

48
00:02:32,840 --> 00:02:35,720
He'd jump up out of his 
recliner, running out, cursing 

49
00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:38,080
and swearing at him. 
Or it might be that we have the 

50
00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:40,880
television too loud at night 
when he was trying to sleep and 

51
00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:44,400
he'd come busting out of the 
bedroom cursing and swearing at 

52
00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:46,360
us. 
Whatever it was, when it 

53
00:02:46,360 --> 00:02:49,800
happened, the things got loud 
and the expertise began to fly. 

54
00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:53,000
And these outbursts of anger 
created a lot of different 

55
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:56,680
emotions in me as a child. 
Everything from fear to 

56
00:02:56,680 --> 00:03:00,440
embarrassment to, well, making 
me angry over his anger. 

57
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:04,560
On one particular occasion I 
think I was maybe 11 years old. 

58
00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:06,560
I was riding shotgun. 
I don't know where we were 

59
00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:11,520
going, but my dad looked over to
the side and didn't notice the 

60
00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:14,960
car in front of him had stopped 
and so he rear-ended the car. 

61
00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:18,880
His first response was to turn 
to me and start screaming and 

62
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:21,920
yelling and swearing at me 
because I didn't tell him to 

63
00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:24,760
stop. 
You see, something had obviously

64
00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:28,240
happened in my father's life 
long before he got in the car 

65
00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:30,440
that day. 
I don't mean minutes or hours 

66
00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:34,480
before, I mean years before. 
There had to be some injustice 

67
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:38,320
in his life that was totally 
unrelated to that Fender Bender,

68
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:41,680
some hurt or offense that never 
got resolved. 

69
00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:45,480
And so it left him responding to
every perceived injustice with 

70
00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:48,800
anger. 
After a while, that anger became

71
00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:51,840
so much a part of his life he 
didn't even notice the damage it

72
00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:54,200
was doing to the people he loved
the most. 

73
00:03:54,680 --> 00:03:57,840
Now, fortunately for me, the 
story ends on a much happier 

74
00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:01,720
note, because in my teenage 
years, my dad stepped across the

75
00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:05,080
line of faith and found Christ 
as his savior and Lord, and it 

76
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:08,240
radically changed him. 
He went out of his way to make 

77
00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:11,520
sure I knew that he was proud of
me and to make sure I knew that 

78
00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:14,840
he loved me. 
And God became a priority for 

79
00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:17,000
him. 
Now at the same time, guys, I'm 

80
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:20,000
not trying to tell you that he 
never got angry again because 

81
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,880
like all of us, there were 
things in his life that made him

82
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:26,160
mad. 
But I do believe he worked hard 

83
00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:28,880
on breaking this habit of anger 
in his life. 

84
00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:32,480
Well, as you guys know, I wrote 
the book Creatures of Habit, 

85
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:34,840
Breaking the habits holding you 
back from God's Best. 

86
00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:37,600
It's a series you guys are 
finishing up this weekend. 

87
00:04:38,120 --> 00:04:41,720
When I did the research for this
book, what I discovered is that 

88
00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:45,920
most of us greatly underestimate
the power of habits in our life.

89
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:50,560
In fact, experts tell us that 
over 40% now wrap your brain 

90
00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:55,440
around that over 40%. 
Almost half of everything we do 

91
00:04:55,440 --> 00:04:57,640
during a day is done out of 
habit. 

92
00:04:57,840 --> 00:05:01,800
That could be anything from 
typing on a keyboard to playing 

93
00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:05,080
a musical instrument to driving 
home from work. 

94
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:08,120
Those things are second nature 
to us. 

95
00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:10,240
We don't even give them a 
thought anymore. 

96
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:14,000
So what is a habit? 
Well, a habit is a simple choice

97
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:17,600
that we make that when it's 
repeated enough times, it 

98
00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:21,480
becomes an unconscious pattern. 
I want you to remember that when

99
00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:25,560
repeated enough times, it 
becomes an unconscious pattern 

100
00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:29,360
and those habits then become our
identity. 

101
00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:33,840
In other words, that's the way 
people know us and recognize us.

102
00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:38,080
They know us for the habits in 
our life, good or bad. 

103
00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:42,240
An example would be, let's say 
that you are a very honest 

104
00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:45,200
individual, but at the same time
you tend to complain just a 

105
00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:48,440
little bit. 
Somebody asked me to tell them 

106
00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:50,720
about you. 
And I say, well, they're as 

107
00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:54,440
honest as the day is long, but 
they do tend to complain just a 

108
00:05:54,440 --> 00:05:55,720
little bit. 
What have I done? 

109
00:05:55,880 --> 00:05:57,840
I've described you by your 
habits. 

110
00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:01,960
And that's the way we describe 
the people in our life, by the 

111
00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:04,880
habits in our life. 
And so that's why it's so 

112
00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:09,120
important that we create good 
habits, you say, Yeah. 

113
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:12,680
But Steven, how do I know if 
it's a good habit or a bad 

114
00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:14,320
habit? 
That's a great question. 

115
00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:19,000
I'm so glad you asked. 
Good habits reinforce your 

116
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:22,760
desire to be Christ. 
Like you read the New Testament,

117
00:06:22,760 --> 00:06:27,120
it becomes very clear that God 
wants us to emulate Jesus. 

118
00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:30,760
And so good habits are the 
things that help that to happen.

119
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:34,200
Those are the things that create
Christ likeness in our life. 

120
00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:39,240
The Bible calls good habits 
spiritual disciplines, and those

121
00:06:39,240 --> 00:06:42,280
spiritual disciplines become 
stepping stones. 

122
00:06:42,440 --> 00:06:44,640
In other words, those are the 
things that help us to. 

123
00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:49,160
Grow and to mature in our faith.
On the other hand, bad habits 

124
00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:51,720
are just the opposite. 
Those are the things that 

125
00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:55,120
conflict with Christ likeness in
our life. 

126
00:06:55,320 --> 00:06:58,480
Those are the things that keep 
us from being the man or woman 

127
00:06:58,480 --> 00:07:01,040
God wants us to be. 
And they're certainly not 

128
00:07:01,040 --> 00:07:04,240
spiritual disciplines. 
The Bible calls those spiritual 

129
00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:06,760
strongholds. 
They get a grip on us. 

130
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:09,200
They get a hold on us, the 
world. 

131
00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,360
Calls them addictions. 
And they certainly are not 

132
00:07:12,360 --> 00:07:15,760
stepping stones. 
If anything, they're tombstones 

133
00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:18,400
in our life. 
They're a death to the purposes 

134
00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:22,280
and plans God has for your life.
Now what I was surprised when I 

135
00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:25,640
did the research for this book, 
I was surprised just how much 

136
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:28,400
the Bible does talk about habits
in our life. 

137
00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:32,320
Probably my favorite scripture 
about habits is Romans chapter 

138
00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:37,840
12 verse 2 where the Apostle 
Paul writes do not conform. 

139
00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:41,000
What is to conform means to take
the shape of something. 

140
00:07:41,320 --> 00:07:44,480
Do not conform to the patterns 
of this world. 

141
00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:48,320
What did we say a habit was? 
A habit is an unconscious 

142
00:07:48,320 --> 00:07:52,440
pattern, Paul writes. 
Do not conform or take the shape

143
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:55,360
of the patterns of this world, 
but instead. 

144
00:07:55,520 --> 00:07:59,000
We need to be transformed. 
To be transformed is to be 

145
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,120
changed. 
How? 

146
00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:05,040
By the renewing of your mind. 
A habit is a mindset. 

147
00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:08,800
And so the way you break a 
mindset, you have to renew your 

148
00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:12,280
mind and create a new habit, a 
good habit. 

149
00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:15,440
So maybe you have the habit of 
lying, and now you're going to 

150
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:20,080
break that habit and create 
honesty, integrity, a habit of 

151
00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:22,920
integrity or truth. 
Telling in your life. 

152
00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:27,400
Listen guys, before you invited 
Jesus Christ to come into your 

153
00:08:27,400 --> 00:08:30,600
life, the Bible makes it very 
clear that sin had a grip on 

154
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:32,679
you. 
Sin had a hold on you. 

155
00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:36,600
But Paul tells us in Romans that
when we invite Christ to come in

156
00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:39,440
our life. 
He gave us the power to say no 

157
00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:41,760
to sin. 
He breaks that hold. 

158
00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:44,680
He breaks that grip at the same 
time. 

159
00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:47,360
Some of you say, But Steve, I've
been a Christian now for a 

160
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:50,240
decade and I still have these 
bad habits. 

161
00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:53,200
You didn't get that habit 
overnight and you're not going 

162
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:56,200
to break it overnight. 
You have to be intentional. 

163
00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:59,800
Make a decision that, you know 
what, this is not good for me 

164
00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:01,760
spiritually. 
It's not good for me 

165
00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:03,120
emotionally. 
I'm going to. 

166
00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:06,760
Break this habit and so you have
to be intentional in doing so. 

167
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,400
I think this book will help you 
do that. 

168
00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:13,960
There are 12 chapters, some say,
well, how did you come up with 

169
00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:17,160
these 12 bad habits? 
And what I did is I made a list 

170
00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:20,360
of 50 bad habits. 
I looked at them and said, OK, 

171
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:22,600
I'm going to write about the 
ones I. 

172
00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:25,840
Struggle with. 
So I pulled out the 12 that I've

173
00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:29,760
struggled with to 1° or another.
I tell a little bit about the 

174
00:09:29,760 --> 00:09:34,000
habit and then in each habit I 
give you the steps you can take 

175
00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:38,480
to break this once and for all. 
This is a great book for Bible 

176
00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:40,680
studies 'cause it creates such 
discussion. 

177
00:09:40,840 --> 00:09:43,960
It's great for small groups, for
men's groups, women's groups, 

178
00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:47,560
and it's also good workbook. 
Some of you might say, Steve, I 

179
00:09:47,560 --> 00:09:51,160
don't like to read, OK then 
what's 1. 

180
00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:52,760
Habit you want to break this 
year? 

181
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:55,760
That's in here. 
Read that book, read that 

182
00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:59,080
particular chapter, work those 
points, and just continue to 

183
00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:02,080
work on that chapter until you 
break that habit. 

184
00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:04,920
A year from now it starts to 
come back on. 

185
00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:08,320
You just go back and work the 
points again until you break 

186
00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:11,720
this once and for all. 
I'd love to sign a copy for you 

187
00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:14,880
afterwards. 
I'll be out out in the foyer 

188
00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:17,040
today. 
I want us to talk about the 

189
00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:20,120
habit of anger. 
But guys, I think it's important

190
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,760
to mention that anger is not 
always a bad thing. 

191
00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,760
In fact, anger is a God-given 
emotion. 

192
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:29,680
It's when it becomes a habit or 
the way we automatically respond

193
00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:32,040
to things, that's when it 
becomes a problem. 

194
00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:36,160
So an example would be, let's 
say that you say something to me

195
00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:38,400
that's offensive. 
And that makes me angry. 

196
00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:41,280
And so I lash out at you. 
I blast you. 

197
00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:43,560
And I walk. 
Away and it just felt good. 

198
00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:47,480
Felt right to let you have it. 
And then tomorrow somebody else 

199
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:49,920
says something to offend me. 
And I remember how good that 

200
00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:52,120
felt. 
And so now I lash out at you. 

201
00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:55,520
It felt good. 
Again, before I know it, that's 

202
00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:58,440
just going to be the way I 
respond to everybody because I 

203
00:10:58,440 --> 00:11:03,080
create a habit, guys. 
Everyone in this room knows of 

204
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,960
somebody in your life that you 
would say, yeah, they're just an

205
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:09,920
angry individual. 
They're just an angry person. 

206
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:14,960
Anger is one of the most common 
struggles that I think we have 

207
00:11:15,400 --> 00:11:17,480
now. 
Anger was designed by God to 

208
00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:20,640
help us deal with any threat 
that might come into our life. 

209
00:11:21,080 --> 00:11:24,520
But it becomes a problem when 
you lose control of your words 

210
00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:27,600
or your actions. 
For instance, don't we all know 

211
00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:30,560
that Jesus got angry? 
Do you remember when he ran the 

212
00:11:30,560 --> 00:11:32,240
money changers out of the 
temple? 

213
00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:35,440
The merchants were turning 
religion into a money making 

214
00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:38,160
scam and it ticked him off. 
It angered him. 

215
00:11:38,560 --> 00:11:41,360
I think there's other things 
that make Jesus angry. 

216
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:44,080
Any kind of injustice angers 
God. 

217
00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:47,680
I think it angers God to see an 
adult harm a child. 

218
00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:51,360
And yet, even though Jesus got 
angry, the scripture is clear, 

219
00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:55,160
he never sinned. 
You see, the type of anger that 

220
00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:59,000
Jesus demonstrated was more of a
righteous indignation. 

221
00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:04,160
He got angry at the actions of 
those who acted contrary to 

222
00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:07,120
God's standard of right or 
wrong, to God's standard of 

223
00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:11,320
fairness, justice and goodness. 
This type of anger is directed 

224
00:12:11,320 --> 00:12:13,640
more at the wrong that is done. 
Hear me? 

225
00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:16,800
It's directed at the wrong that 
is done, not so much towards the

226
00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:20,080
person involved. 
In fact, it's this kind of anger

227
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:24,960
that's produced great movements 
today, like Mad Mothers Against 

228
00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:28,960
Drunk Driving. 
Their anger over the loss of 

229
00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:32,200
their children motivated them to
do something about it by 

230
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:34,920
creating one of the largest 
victim advocate groups in 

231
00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:38,800
America today. 
On the other hand, anger is an 

232
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:41,920
emotion that many of us 
experience when the things in 

233
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,920
our world just don't go the way 
we want them to go. 

234
00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:49,160
Maybe you've been working really
hard toward that promotion and 

235
00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:52,240
it goes to somebody else and 
that just ticks you off. 

236
00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:55,560
Maybe you tell your kids to 
clean their room, but they just 

237
00:12:55,560 --> 00:12:59,120
continue to ignore you and that 
makes you so mad. 

238
00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:03,000
Again guys. 
If anger becomes your immediate 

239
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:06,240
response every time you don't 
like something, then you 

240
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:10,600
establish a habit in your life. 
And it has the potential to hurt

241
00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:14,040
your health, to wreck your Peace
of Mind, to destroy your 

242
00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:16,960
relationships and even threaten 
your career. 

243
00:13:17,320 --> 00:13:21,760
Seriously, I don't know how many
times my father came home to 

244
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:23,920
tell my mother that he'd been 
fired again. 

245
00:13:23,920 --> 00:13:26,440
I really don't. 
It happened constantly. 

246
00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:32,560
One time several years ago, I 
brought in Doctor Richard 

247
00:13:32,560 --> 00:13:35,880
Dobbins, psychologist, to speak 
to a men's group. 

248
00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:39,320
And I had probably 400 guys that
were in the room that day. 

249
00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:41,600
And I remember when Doctor 
Dobbins stepped up on the 

250
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:45,720
platform, he looked out at those
men and he said, gentlemen, men 

251
00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:51,320
struggle with three issues, 
anger issues, sexual issues. 

252
00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:58,720
And you lie about the 1st 2:00. 
Anger has become an epidemic in 

253
00:13:58,720 --> 00:14:00,920
America today. 
I don't think I have to work 

254
00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:02,560
very hard to convince you of 
that. 

255
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:06,840
We all see it everywhere we go. 
There's signs of our nation's 

256
00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:09,960
irritability everywhere you go. 
The polarization of our 

257
00:14:09,960 --> 00:14:14,040
political system, the everyday 
nastiness of the online world. 

258
00:14:14,200 --> 00:14:17,120
The cancel culture? 
Come on, it's out of control. 

259
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:21,720
Or even worse yet, is the 
workplace or school shootings? 

260
00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:25,160
It's gotten to where you feel 
like at least once a month we're

261
00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:27,760
going to turn the news on and 
hear about another school 

262
00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:30,720
shooting or another workplace 
shooting guys. 

263
00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:34,080
It's gotten so bad, we're afraid
to lock eyes with anyone in fear

264
00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:38,200
they might pull out a gun. 
And yet, after saying all that, 

265
00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:41,320
most violence in America is not 
random. 

266
00:14:41,920 --> 00:14:47,920
The American SPCC, for instance,
says there's over 4 million 

267
00:14:48,120 --> 00:14:53,680
child abuse cases reported 
annually, 4 million child abuse 

268
00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:58,440
cases reported. 
Can you imagine how many more go

269
00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:01,600
unreported? 
And most of those are by angry, 

270
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:05,760
out of control parents, friends.
No one is born with anger 

271
00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:08,880
issues. 
It is learned behavior. 

272
00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:11,440
I mean, Can you imagine me 
coming up here this morning 

273
00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:14,360
carrying a little infant, a 
little baby just so sweet 

274
00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:18,040
everybody would aw and oh and 
and they would love it. 

275
00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:21,280
And then you, they say that's 
you all say, that's the sweetest

276
00:15:21,280 --> 00:15:23,600
baby I've ever seen. 
I'm like, Oh no, this is an 

277
00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:26,120
angry one. 
Well, it's just silly. 

278
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:29,040
It's ridiculous because we know 
that's not the case. 

279
00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:33,920
Anger is learned behavior, which
is why listen to me, moms and 

280
00:15:33,920 --> 00:15:36,640
dads, please. 
Which is why if you are a 

281
00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:40,400
parent, you need to learn to 
control your anger in front of 

282
00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:42,520
your kids. 
You say, well, that's just the 

283
00:15:42,520 --> 00:15:44,840
way I am. 
Well, you better understand that

284
00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:47,480
that's the way your kids are 
going to be because you are 

285
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:52,280
teaching them to respond to 
circumstances out of anger. 

286
00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:57,120
Psychologists today have called 
our generation the age of rage. 

287
00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:01,400
It's become so common, we've 
created our own rage vocabulary,

288
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:05,120
for instance, Road rage. 
All of you have heard of that, 

289
00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:09,440
maybe experienced it. 
Check out Rage, Phone rage. 

290
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:12,960
You get put on hold too long. 
We even see it in recreational 

291
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:17,160
activities such as golf Rage. 
Yeah, it's a thing. 

292
00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:21,680
Several years ago, I was golfing
with three other pastors. 

293
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:24,840
And this one guy was just having
a bad day. 

294
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:26,640
I mean, the poor guy, every, 
every time. 

295
00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:29,560
Every time he took a swing, it 
just went the wrong way. 

296
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:32,280
And he was getting, you could 
just see it and feel it. 

297
00:16:32,280 --> 00:16:34,880
He was getting more and more 
frustrated and more and more 

298
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:36,960
angry. 
Finally, we come to a hole, he 

299
00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:39,400
hits it, the ball goes into the 
pond and he's just done. 

300
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:42,240
He takes his club, swings it and
throws it into the pond. 

301
00:16:42,560 --> 00:16:45,680
Awkward. 
And then he gets into the golf 

302
00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:48,160
cart and drives on. 
Well, the next two holes, 

303
00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:50,360
there's not much conversation 
going on. 

304
00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:53,160
We're all pretty quiet. 
And then finally he just says 

305
00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:55,000
I'll be back and he gets in the 
cart. 

306
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:58,000
He drives back to that pond. 
He wades out into that murky 

307
00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,200
water, finds his club, comes 
back. 

308
00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:03,680
He's muddy from here down, and 
plays the rest of the day in 

309
00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:08,119
that murky clothes. 
Proverbs chapter 1429 says 

310
00:17:08,119 --> 00:17:11,520
people with understanding 
control their anger. 

311
00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:14,640
A hot temper shows great 
foolishness. 

312
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:18,040
I know there's some of you that 
might argue and say, Steve, I I 

313
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:19,800
I really can't. 
I know what you're saying, but I

314
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:23,160
can't control my anger. 
Well, I'm going to push back a 

315
00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:25,839
little bit here and say while 
you might not be able to control

316
00:17:25,839 --> 00:17:29,240
the situation, you might not be 
able to control how it makes you

317
00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:32,560
feel. 
You certainly can control how 

318
00:17:32,560 --> 00:17:35,920
you express your anger. 
It reminds me of a story I read 

319
00:17:35,920 --> 00:17:38,360
several years ago and it's said 
to be a true story. 

320
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:42,440
You know how in other countries 
they often times do outdoor 

321
00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,840
passion plays? 
Well, in this particular 

322
00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:48,320
community, every year they did 
this passion play and they do it

323
00:17:48,320 --> 00:17:50,960
in the streets. 
And so the audience is along the

324
00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:53,480
sidewalk. 
This was supposed to be the Via 

325
00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:56,720
della Rossa. 
And Jesus is carrying his cross 

326
00:17:56,880 --> 00:17:59,480
on this particular day. 
He's walking up the street 

327
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:02,520
carrying his cross, and there's 
a Heckler. 

328
00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:05,200
And this Heckler is so obnoxious
and so rude. 

329
00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:06,800
And he's not just staying in one
place. 

330
00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:10,360
As Jesus walks, he's following 
him up, just being abusive. 

331
00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:13,440
And it comes to a point. 
All of a sudden Jesus stops. 

332
00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:17,880
He puts down the cross and he 
walks over to the guy and he 

333
00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:21,760
punches him in the face and he 
walks back over and he picks up 

334
00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:24,160
his cross and he just starts 
going again. 

335
00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:27,880
Well, you can imagine after the 
play, the director came up, came

336
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:29,840
up and says. 
What are you doing? 

337
00:18:30,320 --> 00:18:33,240
He said. 
I cannot have the actors abusing

338
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:36,800
the audience, especially the one
playing Jesus. 

339
00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:39,920
He's like, I'm so sorry man. 
I just lost my cool. 

340
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:41,840
I wasn't thinking it will never 
happen again. 

341
00:18:41,840 --> 00:18:46,360
He said it better not day two, 
same scenario, same Heckler, 

342
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:48,960
just keeps going. 
He finally gets to point, he 

343
00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:51,600
breaks, he puts down the cross, 
he goes over and he hits him 

344
00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:53,920
again. 
He comes back and on he goes. 

345
00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:56,400
The director afterwards said, 
you're done, you're fired. 

346
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:59,080
I can't have that. 
And the guy said please don't 

347
00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:00,840
fire. 
If you fire me, no one will ever

348
00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:02,760
hire me to act in this town 
again. 

349
00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:05,360
I'm just finished, he said. 
You got to give me one more 

350
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,440
chance. 
And he said I'll give you one 

351
00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:09,520
more chance. 
But I'm telling you, if you do 

352
00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:12,120
anything like that ever again, 
don't even come looking for me. 

353
00:19:12,120 --> 00:19:15,080
Just get your stuff and get out 
of here and I will make sure you

354
00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:16,960
never work in this community 
again. 

355
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:20,160
So day three, same scenario. 
He's carrying it. 

356
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,600
Same Heckler, more obnoxious 
than he's ever been. 

357
00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:25,400
He's squeezing his first, 
grinding his teeth, doing 

358
00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:27,440
everything he can. 
And finally he stops. 

359
00:19:28,240 --> 00:19:31,880
He turns toward the Heckler and 
he said I'll meet you after the 

360
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:33,680
resurrection. 
And on he goes. 

361
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:39,600
Guys, if we don't learn to 
control our anger, we will never

362
00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:42,800
be like Jesus. 
Some of you try to use anger to 

363
00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:45,920
motivate people to action. 
You yell at your kids to 

364
00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:48,560
motivate their behavior. 
You yell at the sales clerk to 

365
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:51,680
motivate her to help you. 
You yell at your employees to 

366
00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:53,840
motivate them to work harder. 
And you know what? 

367
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:57,800
It works, at least in the short 
term. 

368
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:02,160
You can scare people into doing 
almost anything but guys in the 

369
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:05,080
long run, listen to me. 
In the long run, you will always

370
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:09,080
lose because anger always 
alienates people. 

371
00:20:09,360 --> 00:20:13,000
I mean, when someone is shouting
at you and yelling at you, does 

372
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:14,960
it does it make you want to give
them a hug? 

373
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:17,960
No. 
When someone is in your face and

374
00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,400
they're shouting at you, what do
you do? 

375
00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,680
You're you're backing away, 
you're putting your hand up. 

376
00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:23,320
It's like, get away from me. 
Go on. 

377
00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:25,800
I don't want to hear this. 
You shut down. 

378
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:32,920
Anger always alienates people. 
If you were a parent and you are

379
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:36,520
using anger to motivate your 
kids, listen to me. 

380
00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:39,480
You are actually pushing your 
kids away. 

381
00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:43,200
Let me explain what I mean. 
When your kids were young, they 

382
00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:46,320
thought you were a superhero. 
Come on, everyone else might 

383
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:48,600
think you're a bit quirky. 
Some people might think you're a

384
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:50,600
bit odd. 
Not your kids. 

385
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:55,120
They think you can do no wrong. 
Their spirits are wide open. 

386
00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:57,880
But guys, if you continue, 
listen to me. 

387
00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:01,680
If you continue to show anger 
towards your children, it will 

388
00:21:01,680 --> 00:21:07,560
close down their spirit. 
They can't move out, so they'll 

389
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:10,640
still live under your roof, but 
their spirits are closed. 

390
00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:14,000
And what do we do as parents? 
We say, oh, it's just the 

391
00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:15,920
generations today. 
It's just the way kids are 

392
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:17,720
today. 
Or we'll say it's a generation 

393
00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:20,760
gap. 
No, it's not a generation gap. 

394
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:23,480
No, it's not the way kids are 
today. 

395
00:21:23,720 --> 00:21:28,360
You have shut down their spirit 
and it's very difficult to get 

396
00:21:28,360 --> 00:21:30,920
their spirit wide open again. 
And the only way you're going to

397
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:34,120
do that is if they see you 
really are, first of all 

398
00:21:34,120 --> 00:21:36,560
repentive of it, that you're 
sorry for it and that you're 

399
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:39,240
getting help for the anger in 
your life. 

400
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:43,640
Paul addresses this in Ephesians
chapter 6, verse four. 

401
00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:47,080
He said fathers do not provoke 
your children to anger by the 

402
00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:50,120
way you treat them. 
Rather bring them up with the 

403
00:21:50,120 --> 00:21:52,880
discipline and instruction that 
comes from the Lord. 

404
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:57,040
Friends, listen, if you struggle
with the habit of anger, you 

405
00:21:57,040 --> 00:21:59,000
might feel like there's nothing 
you can do. 

406
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:02,040
But you have more control over 
your anger than you think you 

407
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:04,240
do. 
You can learn to express your 

408
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:09,600
emotions without losing control.
So today I want to give you a 

409
00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:13,000
few steps you can use to break 
this habit in your life once and

410
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,520
for all. 
But hear me on this. 

411
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:21,920
If you work these steps and it 
still doesn't work, please hear 

412
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:23,920
me. 
You work these steps and it 

413
00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:27,240
still doesn't work. 
You need to get professional 

414
00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:29,360
help. 
You need to get a counselor, 

415
00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:32,680
especially someone that 
specializes in anger issues. 

416
00:22:33,120 --> 00:22:38,240
I cannot overstate this because 
so you work the steps and you 

417
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:40,920
say, Steve, it just didn't work.
Get help. 

418
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:44,320
Because guys, if you don't, 
you're going to come to the end 

419
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:46,480
of your life with all kinds of 
regrets. 

420
00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:51,360
You don't just close the spirit 
of children, you close down the 

421
00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:54,600
spirit of everyone in your life 
that's close to you and you're 

422
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:56,000
going to come to the end of your
life. 

423
00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,400
And the people that you love the
most aren't going to be there. 

424
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:02,040
And those that are there are 
only there out of obligation. 

425
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:07,040
So if that's not the way you 
want to end your life, I don't 

426
00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:10,280
care how old you are. 
I don't care how long everybody.

427
00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:12,160
So everybody just knows that's 
the way I am. 

428
00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:14,080
I've just been this way. 
People understand it. 

429
00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:17,960
No, they don't understand it. 
You're deceiving yourself. 

430
00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:21,160
They don't understand it. 
So there has to come a point 

431
00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:24,280
where you say to your family, 
I'm sorry that I've hurt you. 

432
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:27,920
I'm sorry that I've demonstrated
and taken this anger out on you.

433
00:23:28,120 --> 00:23:29,920
I've worked the steps. 
It's not working. 

434
00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:31,920
So I'm going to get help. 
Professional help. 

435
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:34,320
I hope you can bring yourself to
forgive me. 

436
00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:37,960
One day you'll be surprised how 
forgiving people can be. 

437
00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:41,600
You'll be surprised the family 
that loves you will jump at the 

438
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:45,280
chance to see you break this 
habit once and for all in your 

439
00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:48,600
life. 
But guys, we often try to excuse

440
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,640
our behavior by blaming other 
people for our anger, don't we? 

441
00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:55,240
You know you talk to somebody 
about their anger and they'll 

442
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:57,640
say, well it those it's those 
kids of mine that caused me to 

443
00:23:57,640 --> 00:24:00,800
be so angry or my Co workers 
make me so mad. 

444
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:03,400
You know Steve, if she wouldn't 
have said that, I wouldn't have 

445
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:06,560
lost my temper. 
Listen guys, before you ever 

446
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:10,080
break this habit of anger, you 
have to own it. 

447
00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:14,000
You have to take responsibility.
I already told you all 12 

448
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,000
chapters. 
I've struggled with all of them 

449
00:24:16,000 --> 00:24:18,680
to 1° or another. 
So I've owned it. 

450
00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:23,040
I've owned each one and because 
I owned it, I was able to deal 

451
00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:27,000
with each one in my life. 
So you have to own the problem 

452
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,440
1st and then you can begin to 
take the steps. 

453
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:32,920
So let me quickly give you and 
the time we have left some of 

454
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:36,080
the steps you can take #1 
Identify the source of your 

455
00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:38,320
anger. 
Guys, if you have a habit of 

456
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:42,360
losing control over every 
perceived injustice, you need to

457
00:24:42,360 --> 00:24:44,520
figure out what's really behind 
your anger. 

458
00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:48,160
Because, guys, anger is rarely 
the primary problem. 

459
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:52,440
In other words, it's usually the
result of a much deeper problem,

460
00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:56,960
a much deeper issue like pride 
or hurt or insecurity or 

461
00:24:56,960 --> 00:25:00,760
embarrassment. 
But once I understand what's 

462
00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:04,160
behind my anger, then I'm more 
likely to resolve it. 

463
00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:06,120
Let me give you a personal 
example. 

464
00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:11,400
When I was in my 30s, I started 
having a great deal of muscle 

465
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:15,720
and joint pain. 
I I started going to doctors 

466
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:18,560
trying to figure it out, and 
nobody seemed to be able to 

467
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:21,440
pinpoint what it was. 
Some said it was stress, some 

468
00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:24,320
people said it was fibromyalgia,
Other people had other names. 

469
00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:25,840
They were throwing out all kinds
of names. 

470
00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:28,600
Nobody seemed to be able to 
figure out what it was. 

471
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:33,360
But pain is debilitating, and I 
just know that I was in a lot of

472
00:25:33,360 --> 00:25:35,720
pain. 
And I know that because of that,

473
00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:40,280
my temper was short. 
I was impatient, and all of a 

474
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:44,000
sudden during that period, I'm 
taking it out on the people I 

475
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:46,200
love the most. 
They're doing something, just 

476
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:49,040
not the way I wanted it, and I'm
letting them have it. 

477
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:53,080
So pain can be an underlying 
problem of your anger. 

478
00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:55,800
Emotional pain can be an 
underlying problem. 

479
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:59,760
Some of you have got unresolved 
issues from maybe when you were 

480
00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:02,640
a child and you've never dealt 
with it, and it's causing you to

481
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:06,080
be angry to this day. 
Some of you just maybe had a 

482
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:10,560
broken relationship and it's 
causing you to be angry and 

483
00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:15,680
causing you to lose your temper.
Maybe someone, whatever. 

484
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:18,520
There's just all kinds of common
causes of anger. 

485
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:20,800
I'm just saying if you can 
identify the source of your 

486
00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:24,200
anger, you're more likely to 
understand how to deal with it 

487
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:27,680
#2 Learn to calm down before you
react. 

488
00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:29,880
Here's the thing about the 
emotion of anger. 

489
00:26:30,640 --> 00:26:34,200
They're all God-given emotions, 
but the emotion of anger is 1. 

490
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:38,640
We can feel, can't we? 
It's like when I'm start to get 

491
00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:41,240
angry. 
I feel it deep in my gut and it 

492
00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:44,080
starts to rise. 
The more angry I get, the more I

493
00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:48,440
feel it coming up. 
So when I recognize it, when I 

494
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:51,680
recognize there's a problem of 
anger, I just need to calm down.

495
00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:54,520
I just need to walk away. 
When I start to feel those 

496
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:58,120
emotions rise, I need to take a 
few minutes to collect my 

497
00:26:58,120 --> 00:27:01,800
thoughts and just explain it. 
If your kids, if you're angry at

498
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:03,960
your kids and you want to lay 
into them and you know that's 

499
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:07,400
not what I want to do, so just 
simply say to them, we're going 

500
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:11,080
to talk about this this evening.
So I want you to think about it.

501
00:27:11,920 --> 00:27:14,400
I'm going to walk away right now
and you calm down. 

502
00:27:14,400 --> 00:27:16,800
And once you've calmed down, 
then you come back and have the 

503
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:20,120
conversation with your spouse to
just say, you know, I don't want

504
00:27:20,120 --> 00:27:21,480
to have this conversation right 
now. 

505
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,000
I'm too, too angry and you calm 
down. 

506
00:27:24,360 --> 00:27:27,240
Now I know, listen, I know 
that's easier said than done 

507
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:29,960
because the emotion of anger is 
a tough one. 

508
00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:33,080
And when that emotion is rising,
you want to lay into that 

509
00:27:33,080 --> 00:27:34,880
person. 
But if you seriously want to 

510
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:37,960
break this once and for all, 
you've got to be intentional 

511
00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:41,600
about walking away. 
Ask yourself. 

512
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:44,680
Talk is also very helpful. 
Ask yourself questions. 

513
00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:46,640
Is it really worth getting this 
upset over? 

514
00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:48,880
Will my anger really solve 
anything? 

515
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:54,920
Proverbs 2911 says fools vent 
their anger, but the wise 

516
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:58,120
quietly hold it back. 
In other words, think before you

517
00:27:58,120 --> 00:28:00,160
speak. 
Put your mind in gear before you

518
00:28:00,160 --> 00:28:02,880
put your mouth in motion. 
I heard it said before. 

519
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:06,320
I've never regretted silence, 
but I've often regretted what I 

520
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:08,640
spoke. 
I love the book of James. 

521
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:11,640
He's just so blunt. 
I mean, he just cuts right to 

522
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:13,360
the chase and says it the way it
is. 

523
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:17,160
In chapter one, verse 19, he 
says you must be quick to learn.

524
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:19,240
Excuse me? 
You must be quick to listen, 

525
00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:21,680
slow to speak and slow to get 
angry. 

526
00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:24,360
Right to the point. 
That's a refrigerator verse, 

527
00:28:24,360 --> 00:28:25,200
man. 
Stick that up. 

528
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:28,880
You got to be quick to listen, 
slow to speak and slow to get 

529
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:32,880
angry #3 Get some exercise. 
Some of you say, man, that's out

530
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:34,440
of left field. 
Where did that come from? 

531
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:38,120
What do we got to exercise for? 
Seriously, it helps. 

532
00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:40,600
Exercise helps. 
It helps to take a walk to go to

533
00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:42,760
the gym. 
Whatever you need to do to 

534
00:28:42,760 --> 00:28:45,440
reduce. 
Your level of anger and stress. 

535
00:28:46,040 --> 00:28:50,200
Experts say that exercise helps 
increase the release of 

536
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:53,760
endorphins in our body, which 
helps to reduce your stress. 

537
00:28:53,760 --> 00:28:58,880
Level #4 Let go of my anger 
correctly, guys. 

538
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,480
I could spend the whole time 
just talking about this point. 

539
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:04,440
There's a lot that could be said
about how we let go of our 

540
00:29:04,440 --> 00:29:07,480
anger. 
You're not going to handle You 

541
00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:11,240
cannot handle your anger in 
inappropriate ways, for 

542
00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:13,400
instance. 
Don't repress it. 

543
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:17,160
Now, some of you would say, But 
Steve, as a Christian, I would 

544
00:29:17,160 --> 00:29:19,080
think that's the way we're 
supposed to respond. 

545
00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:22,040
Or as a Christian, I'm not 
supposed to blow up at people. 

546
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:23,960
Aren't I supposed to repress it?
No. 

547
00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:27,360
Your anger is always going to 
find a way to be expressed, 

548
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:31,160
sometimes through sarcasm. 
Some of you think you're pretty 

549
00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:33,920
witty with your sarcasm, but 
it's actually coming from 

550
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:37,160
repressed anger. 
Some of you try to manipulate to

551
00:29:37,160 --> 00:29:40,240
get your own way. 
Others of you have a vindictive 

552
00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:43,120
spirit and you say, I don't get 
mad, I just get even. 

553
00:29:44,080 --> 00:29:47,920
Listen friends, whether you 
complain, blame or criticize, 

554
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:52,000
people that are negative are 
usually trying to repress their 

555
00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:54,560
anger. 
But friends, again, anger will 

556
00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:58,640
always find a way of release. 
Several years ago I did a 

557
00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:02,360
funeral for a 14 year old boy 
that was struck and killed by 

558
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:07,800
lightning and it was a horrible 
scene and but the the uncle was 

559
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:11,080
knocked out unconscious but he 
came back and the dog was 

560
00:30:11,080 --> 00:30:15,640
knocked unconscious but the boy 
took a direct hit and I remember

561
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:19,640
as seeing this and saying to the
police officer I noticed on the 

562
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:24,680
boy his jeans blew out and his 
knees and I said what in the 

563
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:27,520
world is that all about. 
And the police officer said 

564
00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:30,560
electricity always has to find a
way of release. 

565
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:34,280
And it came out his knees. 
It will always find a way of 

566
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:36,520
release. 
And I remember walking away from

567
00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:38,400
that thinking, man, that's just 
like anger. 

568
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:42,080
Anger always has to find a way 
of release. 

569
00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:45,120
By the way, there's another word
for repressed anger. 

570
00:30:45,120 --> 00:30:45,880
You know what? 
That word. 

571
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:50,240
Is depression. 
Depression is frozen rage, 

572
00:30:50,440 --> 00:30:55,120
repressed anger, and yet guys, 
on the flip side, you can't just

573
00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:59,560
express your anger with violent 
or abusive reactions or verbal 

574
00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:01,120
abuse. 
That's the way my father 

575
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:04,120
responded. 
When you do, you leave burn 

576
00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:07,400
marks on everyone in your path, 
one pastor said. 

577
00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:10,760
We often act like a skunk. 
We spray our stinking temper on 

578
00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:15,640
anyone that gets in our way #5. 
Practice forgiveness. 

579
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:20,360
Forgiveness can be a good habit.
Unforgiveness is a bad habit. 

580
00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:23,240
But you can create the habit of 
forgiveness in your life. 

581
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:26,080
We know Jesus was unjustly 
beaten and mocked. 

582
00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:29,160
They placed a crown of thorn 
thorns on his head, and they 

583
00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:31,320
nailed his hands and feet to a 
wooden cross. 

584
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:35,000
If anybody had the right to be 
angry, it was certainly Jesus. 

585
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:37,640
Do you remember what he said? 
Father? 

586
00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:39,520
Forgive them. 
They don't know what they're 

587
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:42,040
doing. 
If you really want to get rid of

588
00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:46,400
your anger, you have to make the
decision be intentional, that 

589
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:48,640
you're going to forgive the 
person who's done you wrong. 

590
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:51,520
If I make that decision today, I
don't like it. 

591
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:52,720
It hurt. 
But I'm going to forgive you. 

592
00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:53,800
I don't like it. 
It hurt. 

593
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:55,720
But I'm going to forgive you 
before you know it. 

594
00:31:55,920 --> 00:31:59,560
That just becomes who you are. 
That becomes a good habit in 

595
00:31:59,560 --> 00:32:02,840
your life, Colossians 3 says. 
Bear with each other and forgive

596
00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:05,000
one another. 
If any of you has a grievance 

597
00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:07,560
against someone, forgive us. 
The Lord forgave you. 

598
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:11,280
Lewis Smedes once wrote to 
forgive us, to set a prisoner 

599
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:15,840
free and discover the prisoner 
is you, And yet forgiveness. 

600
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:19,840
Is a process, and while it might
take time to let it go, you can 

601
00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:21,440
forgive that person that wronged
you. 

602
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:25,360
Number six, give your anger and 
expiration date. 

603
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,520
Guys, there are some of you in 
this room that have been holding

604
00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:33,360
on to anger for decades. 
There's some of you, this room 

605
00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:36,520
that you're angry over something
that happened to you as a child 

606
00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:40,120
and you've never let it go. 
Some of you got had something 

607
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:43,480
happen earlier this year and 
you're still holding on to it, 

608
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:48,160
Paul writes in Ephesian 4. 
Don't let the sun go down while 

609
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:50,800
you're still angry. 
In other words, don't let 24 

610
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:53,200
hours go by before you resolve 
it. 

611
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:57,080
Don't let a 24 hour period go by
until you get rid of this once 

612
00:32:57,080 --> 00:32:59,640
and for all. 
So it's like I'm going to cut 

613
00:32:59,640 --> 00:33:01,760
this off. 
This is not going to hold me 

614
00:33:01,760 --> 00:33:04,440
prisoner anymore. 
Because guys. 

615
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:08,720
When you allow angry emotions to
accumulate over time, like a 

616
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:11,320
pressure cooker, it's going to 
eventually explode in 

617
00:33:11,320 --> 00:33:14,320
destructive and inappropriate 
ways that are only going to hurt

618
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,720
the people you love the most. 
It's going to leave you with 

619
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:21,440
regrets #7. 
Rely on God's control. 

620
00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:24,480
Seriously. 
If you really believe that God 

621
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:28,800
has a plan for your life, you 
will experience contentment and 

622
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:34,560
peace. 
You know, there's a there's a 

623
00:33:34,920 --> 00:33:36,920
for our people. 
I did an illustration, and 

624
00:33:36,920 --> 00:33:38,440
you're just going to have to 
visualize this. 

625
00:33:38,440 --> 00:33:42,440
But I I brought out two white 
pillars, one said goodness, and 

626
00:33:42,440 --> 00:33:45,680
one said control. 
And I stood between it. 

627
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:48,680
And I said, as long as I stand 
between goodness, believing that

628
00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:52,560
God is a good God that loves me,
and between control, believing 

629
00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:55,360
that God is in control and he 
has my back, as long as I'm 

630
00:33:55,360 --> 00:33:58,880
here, I'm going to experience 
contentment and peace. 

631
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:03,840
But it's when I step outside of 
those pillars and I say, well, I

632
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:06,840
know God's in control. 
I know he is still on the 

633
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:08,080
throne. 
But you know, I don't. 

634
00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:09,960
I don't know if he loves me or 
not. 

635
00:34:09,960 --> 00:34:12,880
I've made a lot of mistakes. 
When that happens, what happens?

636
00:34:13,199 --> 00:34:17,199
Peace and contentment go down. 
Worry, fear and anger begin to 

637
00:34:17,199 --> 00:34:19,400
rise. 
Maybe I step over here and say, 

638
00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:21,679
well, I know he's a good God, 
but I don't know if I don't know

639
00:34:21,679 --> 00:34:23,159
if he's on the throne anymore or
not. 

640
00:34:23,159 --> 00:34:24,840
Man, look at what's going on in 
the news. 

641
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:31,120
Peace and contentment go down. 
Anger, worry and fear rise. 

642
00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:34,000
And that's why if you're a 
believer and you profess that 

643
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:36,520
God's a good God and you believe
he's on the throne and has your 

644
00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:38,960
back, then you have to stand 
between those two pillars. 

645
00:34:39,199 --> 00:34:43,360
And when you do this, anger will
no longer or any other issue 

646
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:44,840
will no longer be a problem for 
you. 

647
00:34:45,760 --> 00:34:48,920
For instance, maybe you were 
bidding on a new home and you 

648
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:50,600
lost the bid. 
You didn't get it. 

649
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:53,719
It's tempting to want to get 
angry, but then all of a sudden 

650
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:56,719
you realize, you know what? 
God has a plan for my life. 

651
00:34:57,560 --> 00:35:00,160
I may not completely understand 
what he's doing, but I trust 

652
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:03,240
him. 
I believe he has my back. 

653
00:35:03,240 --> 00:35:06,600
There's no reason to get upset. 
Anger is not something you can 

654
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:10,360
prevent, but as long as you keep
it under control and don't allow

655
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:14,800
it to become a habit or a 
pattern, you will have more 

656
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:17,080
peace and healthier 
relationships. 

657
00:35:17,080 --> 00:35:20,280
I'm going to ask you to bow your
head with me, if you would. 

658
00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:22,040
Every head bowed for just a 
moment. 

659
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:24,640
No one's looking around. 
I'm going to simply ask you how 

660
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:27,760
many of you would be honest 
before God that you would own it

661
00:35:27,840 --> 00:35:29,760
and you'd raise your hand and 
say pray for me, Steve. 

662
00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:31,840
I have anger issues. 
Just raise it and then put it 

663
00:35:31,840 --> 00:35:34,880
back down. 
Yeah, all over the room. 

664
00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:38,600
So here's what I want us to do. 
And this maybe seem a little 

665
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:41,000
odd, but I'm going to ask 
everybody in the room, Would you

666
00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:43,800
just cup your hands in front of 
you like you're holding water? 

667
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:47,560
Just cup your hands in front of 
you and I'm going to pray for 

668
00:35:47,680 --> 00:35:50,640
every one of us. 
And I'm asking that if you have 

669
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:55,680
anger issues, if you have any 
issues whatsoever right now, but

670
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:59,080
specifically anger issues, I 
want you to see yourself putting

671
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:01,880
the anger issues in the palms of
your hands. 

672
00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:04,560
Father, I thank you and I praise
you right now for your 

673
00:36:04,560 --> 00:36:06,640
faithfulness in our life. 
And I thank you, God, that he 

674
00:36:06,640 --> 00:36:08,920
who is in US is greater than he 
who's in the world. 

675
00:36:09,160 --> 00:36:11,800
I thank you, God, that you've 
given us the power to say no to 

676
00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:14,960
sin. 
And so now, Lord, as we place 

677
00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:17,880
all of our anger issues in the 
palm of our hand, we we're 

678
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:20,960
giving it to you. 
We're saying no to sin. 

679
00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:23,400
And so right now, guys, I want 
you to just dump it out. 

680
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:26,360
Just let it go. 
Drop it once and for all. 

681
00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:28,600
Father, we're trusting you with 
this. 

682
00:36:28,880 --> 00:36:33,160
And we ask, Lord, that you would
just continue to give us the 

683
00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:36,040
motivation and the desire to do 
something about this. 

684
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:42,320
Give us the heart to break this 
habit of anger once and for all.

685
00:36:42,720 --> 00:36:45,560
For our sake. 
For a children's sake. 

686
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:48,880
For our spouses sake. 
And certainly God. 

687
00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:51,400
For your sake. 
Thanks God, we love you and we 

688
00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:52,920
praise you. 
We just ask it. 

689
00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:55,160
In the name of Jesus. 
Amen. 

690
00:36:56,600 --> 00:36:58,760
Thank you, Crossing. 
I'll be out there to sign if 

691
00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:01,200
anybody wants to. 
And I just want you to know I 

692
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:02,480
love you guys. 
God bless. 

693
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:11,000
So good. 
There's man. 

694
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:12,800
I just want to let you know for 
those of you here in this room 

695
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:14,920
and those of you who are 
watching with us online, there's

696
00:37:14,920 --> 00:37:18,120
there's two things that that 
breaks my heart, that burdens me

697
00:37:18,440 --> 00:37:20,640
pretty deeply and I know it 
breaks the Lord's heart too. 

698
00:37:20,640 --> 00:37:25,600
And the first thing is this is 
that I know that in this room 

699
00:37:25,600 --> 00:37:28,200
and and like I said, those who 
are watching, there's some of 

700
00:37:28,200 --> 00:37:31,080
you you've not started that 
intimate personal relationship 

701
00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:34,760
with Jesus Christ. 
You've not said yes to him. 

702
00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:37,880
And as we talked through all 
these different habits, 

703
00:37:37,880 --> 00:37:42,520
specifically anger, this week 
you are going to go out of this 

704
00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:46,520
room and you're going to try to 
break the habit of anger. 

705
00:37:46,520 --> 00:37:48,800
You're going to try to break the
habit of sin. 

706
00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:51,720
But you can't. 
It's not possible. 

707
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:55,440
You're not strong enough on your
own. 

708
00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:59,560
I'm not strong enough on my own.
I don't have the power to defeat

709
00:37:59,560 --> 00:38:03,760
sin, but Jesus does. 
And when you start that 

710
00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:06,720
intimate, personal relationship 
with Him, when you invite him 

711
00:38:06,720 --> 00:38:09,920
into your life, when you say I 
want to give all control to you,

712
00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:14,760
He gives us the greatest gift, 
and that is salvation and the 

713
00:38:14,760 --> 00:38:17,400
gift of the Holy Spirit to come 
take residence inside of us. 

714
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:21,640
So as we are trying to defeat 
these habits, the Holy Spirit is

715
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:25,480
our helper. 
He helps guide us and direct us,

716
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:29,480
convict us. 
And so I want to invite you, if 

717
00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:33,720
you've not made that decision in
your life, if you're tired of 

718
00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:38,000
trying so hard, but it's not 
working out, if you are just 

719
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:41,280
exhausted because you're trying 
to be good and you're trying to 

720
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:44,680
do the right thing. 
I just want you to know that's 

721
00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:48,240
never going to work out for you.
It didn't work out for me. 

722
00:38:48,240 --> 00:38:50,160
It wasn't until I started that 
walk. 

723
00:38:50,160 --> 00:38:54,240
It wasn't until I said I trust 
in the name of Jesus that he 

724
00:38:54,240 --> 00:38:58,080
came and he took the place in my
life that I was filling with 

725
00:38:58,080 --> 00:39:00,520
other things. 
And he's been teaching me 

726
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:03,360
through his word. 
He's been teaching me through 

727
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:05,000
his spirit. 
He's been teaching me through 

728
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:06,800
the the Church and the people 
around me. 

729
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:09,920
And I I want that for you. 
And I know he wants that for 

730
00:39:09,920 --> 00:39:12,560
you. 
And just a little bit, when the 

731
00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:14,920
music starts, there's going to 
be an opportunity for those of 

732
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:15,920
you who've not made that 
decision. 

733
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:18,160
You haven't been in the waters 
of baptism, who never declared 

734
00:39:18,160 --> 00:39:19,680
Jesus is your Lord and your 
Savior. 

735
00:39:20,000 --> 00:39:21,880
Today's the day you make that 
decision. 

736
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:24,320
If you're watching online, 
there's someone online right 

737
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:26,080
now. 
You just say, hey, that's me, 

738
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:29,040
That's my story. 
I am so tired of doing it on my 

739
00:39:29,040 --> 00:39:30,160
own. 
I need him. 

740
00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:32,000
And there's going to be someone 
right there to help guide you 

741
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:35,120
and direct you. 
And so during this next song, 

742
00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:37,280
you would practice one of those 
steps. 

743
00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:39,640
You would take exercise. 
You'd get up from your seat. 

744
00:39:40,120 --> 00:39:43,280
You'd walk. 
You talk to somebody and help 

745
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:45,800
them. 
Let them help you make that next

746
00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:48,440
step. 
And following him, the second 

747
00:39:48,480 --> 00:39:53,560
thing that breaks my heart is 
for as Christians, and I'm 

748
00:39:53,560 --> 00:39:55,440
talking specifically about 
myself. 

749
00:39:57,040 --> 00:40:01,120
When we live contrary to what he
teaches us, when we don't look 

750
00:40:01,120 --> 00:40:04,800
very much different to the 
world, we give him a bad name. 

751
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:08,880
In whatever context you are, you
find yourself in, we're not 

752
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:11,640
shining bright. 
We actually look exactly the 

753
00:40:11,640 --> 00:40:16,400
same as the rest of the world. 
The anger is overtaking us. 

754
00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:20,480
People look at you and they're 
like, is that Jesus? 

755
00:40:21,320 --> 00:40:24,160
And what it does is it doesn't 
draw people closer to him. 

756
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:26,000
It actually draws people away 
from him. 

757
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:27,200
I don't want to be a part of 
that. 

758
00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:30,760
Where's the fruit in your life? 
Where's the fruit in your life? 

759
00:40:30,760 --> 00:40:32,640
Core. 
And maybe that's you too. 

760
00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:34,960
That that breaks my heart. 
And it breaks his heart that we 

761
00:40:34,960 --> 00:40:39,040
don't represent him well in our 
lives. 

762
00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:45,120
My, my plea to you, for those of
you who are here in these next 

763
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:48,680
moments, for us as Christians, 
that you would identify what it 

764
00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:52,520
is that is drawing people away 
from him. 

765
00:40:53,360 --> 00:40:56,640
You would come up here to these 
steps, you'd get down on your 

766
00:40:56,640 --> 00:41:00,080
knees and you'd say, here it is.
Lord, would you help me? 

767
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:06,120
You know, Steve was instructing 
us to hold it in our hands, the 

768
00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:09,800
anger issues or whatever sin 
issue that you have, and he 

769
00:41:09,960 --> 00:41:14,760
asked us to drop it. 
I went back to me personally. 

770
00:41:14,760 --> 00:41:17,600
There's a lot of times when I've
just, instead of dropping it at 

771
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:22,640
the feet of Jesus, I just slowly
put it right back in my pocket. 

772
00:41:22,920 --> 00:41:26,040
And I walked outside these doors
and I kept trying to do it 

773
00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:28,520
myself. 
And I was like, I'm not ready to

774
00:41:28,520 --> 00:41:30,880
relinquish that control. 
But I'm telling you today, one 

775
00:41:30,880 --> 00:41:33,800
of the ways you can physically 
drop it is by coming up and 

776
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:36,560
giving it to him. 
And the last thing I want to 

777
00:41:36,560 --> 00:41:41,280
share with you is this is, you 
know, youth sports is another 

778
00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:44,280
outlet for anger. 
If you know, you know if you're 

779
00:41:44,280 --> 00:41:47,440
a coach, you've seen it. 
If you've been in the stands, 

780
00:41:47,440 --> 00:41:49,960
you've seen it. 
And the Lord taught me an 

781
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:53,000
incredible lesson yesterday and 
used sports. 

782
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:57,080
A year ago I was coaching a 
first and 2nd grade basketball 

783
00:41:57,080 --> 00:42:01,160
team, my son's team, and as I 
was moving around the court 

784
00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:04,080
trying to help the kids get in 
different positions, I had a A 

785
00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:09,800
grandparent angrily accused me 
and say, hey, I need you to get 

786
00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:11,320
out of my way. 
I was in their way. 

787
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:13,960
They couldn't see their grandkid
stop coaching the way you're 

788
00:42:13,960 --> 00:42:15,680
coaching, go back on your 
sideline. 

789
00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:20,560
I turned around and there's some
anger that came inside of me as 

790
00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:25,800
anger came out of that person 
and it it left an imprint on my 

791
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:29,680
my life for the last year. 
Well, yesterday I was coaching 

792
00:42:30,400 --> 00:42:34,640
and funny how God is is he put 
that grandchild on my team this 

793
00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:39,600
year in the same league. 
But I learned something when 

794
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:43,640
that grandparent came up to me 
and he says, hey, I don't know 

795
00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:49,200
if you Remember Me and I says I 
remember you, he says. 

796
00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:54,520
But last year I lost control of 
my anger and I said some things 

797
00:42:54,520 --> 00:42:55,760
that I shouldn't have said to 
you. 

798
00:42:55,760 --> 00:42:59,120
I didn't understand how you're 
what you're doing and how you're

799
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:00,800
doing it. 
But I see it this year and I 

800
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:02,880
just want you to know that I am 
so sorry. 

801
00:43:04,160 --> 00:43:09,040
What I learned in that was even 
though a year has passed by, his

802
00:43:09,040 --> 00:43:13,200
anger affected me. 
But when he came up and he said 

803
00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:17,160
I need to release this, it not 
only released for him, but it 

804
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:19,400
took a huge weight off my 
shoulder as well. 

805
00:43:19,400 --> 00:43:23,080
And I just wonder, is there 
something in this room that you 

806
00:43:23,080 --> 00:43:26,680
have done to somebody else? 
Is there something that I have 

807
00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:30,400
done to somebody else that I 
have let them sit in my anger 

808
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:34,760
for too long and I have not went
back to that person to say I'm 

809
00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:37,360
sorry. 
Maybe the Lord will just 

810
00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:39,520
continue to teach you like he's 
teaching me and that's what he 

811
00:43:39,520 --> 00:43:41,840
does in this time of invitation.
So I invite you to stand to your

812
00:43:41,840 --> 00:43:46,200
feet as we move into this time. 
They wouldn't stand still. 

813
00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:50,400
You'd exercise the gift of 
moving and humbling yourself. 

814
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:51,880
Would you pray with me? 
God, we love you. 

815
00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:54,520
We're so thankful for this 
opportunity to worship you. 

816
00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:58,920
We're so thankful for your word 
and your spirit. 

817
00:43:59,720 --> 00:44:03,360
And I pray God that we are. 
We've never arrived. 

818
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:06,800
Would you continue convicting us
and impressing upon us what we 

819
00:44:06,800 --> 00:44:09,080
need to do, what our action is? 
God? 

820
00:44:09,080 --> 00:44:13,320
Would you allow us to relinquish
all control to you, to trust you

821
00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:16,440
for those of the people in the 
room and online who have not 

822
00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:19,920
trusted in the sweet name of 
Jesus, That in this moment would

823
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:23,040
you just make it so abundantly 
clear that you have chosen them,

824
00:44:23,040 --> 00:44:26,560
that you love them, and your 
heart breaks for them? 

825
00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:29,760
And, Lord, I pray that they make
a decision to follow you today. 

826
00:44:30,280 --> 00:44:34,120
God, would you help us and guide
us and direct us in this time of

827
00:44:34,120 --> 00:44:35,520
worship? 
In Jesus name I pray. 

828
00:44:35,800 --> 00:44:36,120
Amen.