Yeah, OK. Welcome everybody back to
Dungeons Driving and Die. So wider world, we're back into
it this season. We are AD and D podcast yet
again about well, right now we're about four Cobalts and
their bigger cobalt buddy. I guess we think he's a cobalt
with wings and we don't know otherwise yet about four Cobalts
and their bigger cobalt buddy preparing for the merchant
events. I don't know.
That seems to be like we got to get ready before they get back.
I know that there's been a couple in game days since our
last moment and we'll get to that in a second.
But for now we're answering the questions as to like who?
Oh, I'm M and I play duck. It's hell yeah.
He's back. He's anxious and he's ready to
go. Duckett's Our question of the
day is, what's the biggest responsibility your character's
ever been given? And Duckett's, I don't know, his
name used to be a more traditional Cobalt name like
Jennethy. And Jennifer Duckett's really
worked. How do you spell that?
Jin apostrophe ATHI. I would have said Cobalts don't
spell. He does.
He's good at paperwork. He always was.
And since he was a babe and, and he was before, before all the
Shakespeare stuff, he was the treasurer's apprentice.
And after the adventurers came in, after our benefactors came
in and murdered, I don't know about a dozen folk, I would
imagine the treasurer was one of them.
And so now the bit best responsibility, biggest
responsibility Genesee's ever been given is being the
treasurer. And when they came through a
Shakespeare and he found the word Duckett's, he was just so
excited because he is in charge of buckets, hand buckets of
ducats. When he went there's a remedy to
go ducats, but he doesn't know what that means.
He just says his name like that. He.
Used to, but he got bullied out of that probably.
Yep, pretty quickly. And my name is Bucket of Ducats.
Oh sorry, my name is. Lawrence.
And I play butt soft. The dragon blessed Cobalt.
He's tall, He's here. And the most important thing
he's ever been put in charge of, I mean, in his mind, is this
play. And he's royally screwed it
over. He's he's really, really screwed
the pooch on this one, which is an expression I hate he has.
He's just so desperately worried.
And he the problem with him, he's not really trying to do
anything about it. He's just going to sit and worry
about it. So yeah, hopefully things will
improve for him, but probably not, and that's OK.
And my name is Grace and I play Eep mostly Eep most responsible
for, well, Eep, if you don't remember from last time we met
Eep, it's from the caves that are in like the way back.
So Eep is doesn't really like have a lot.
So I honestly think that this play has been Eep's biggest,
like in his mind, his biggest responsibility.
Because it's like, not like, OK, you clean out all the shit and
the stuff and now he's in a play and it's huge.
I remember what my character's name is.
And that's Canon. Cannot.
Be the most important thing in all.
We were all given such responsibility with this play
and we've all not really. Given it to gravity, the.
Duncan is the IT should be afforded effort here.
Well OK eeps world is really small and it just got a little
bit bigger. Okay, it's not his fault.
As big as this. World was always big.
Okay, he's he was in the way back cave.
Okay, he probably has really bad eyesight because he was in the
way back cave, but he's like night vision.
Disadvantage. He gets double disadvantage to
daylight, extra sunlight sensitivity.
But that night vision? Oh wow, you better watch out.
Roll 4D20, take the lowest. And I am Michael, and I am
currently playing the sorcerer Bite.
And Bite's biggest responsibility is he was put in
charge of the temple after our benefactors kind of ran through
and wrecked the place. So he was working on rebuilding
and straightening things out until he had the opportunity to
join this wayward troop of Thespians.
So he's super excited to be with the troop of Thespians, but he's
also look looking forward to getting back to his temple
maintenance gig once this play is over.
Did he work closely with Attrick?
I think Attrick was the priest. Yeah, no, I think he did work
with with, at least peripherally.
Enough with Attrick that he didn't get killed when the
benefactors came through. Yeah, is.
Attrick still. Alive.
We left Attrick in charred. Oh, did we?
Oh, that's right. We killed Iron Bones.
But we left Attrick. Like a big hole we killed.
Iron Bones and we killed Gab and we killed a bunch of other.
Names of the rolls. And then we healed Attrick.
I don't remember healing Attrick.
You know, Attricks is still around.
Attrick was the one that we left in charge and that we.
Were we've got a gnarly scar yeah we blast.
I think I blasted him with my my catapult shot and.
Then upon them. Doing 1, I said.
You sit down. Upon thinking, I think, I think
EP actually EP and a Stanley are in the way back case, but I
forgot that we're winged Cobalts, so we actually live
like bats. So there's no shit to clean up
because it's just like we're like bats.
It's whatever. Leave it, there's no shit to
clean up because we are bats. Important to the world building.
One bat that cleans shit. Lawrence.
Name it right now. Don't you like live in the same
cave as us? It's.
Like the stinky corner. Like all like.
I understand you're in like the way back, but like that means
that that smell come all the way.
Through. Way back cave have.
You. Been to a cave with because.
It's tanky. Cobalt.
I cannot imagine the smell of cobalt.
And there. Was.
Plenty of shit to clean up at that cave.
OK, OK. All we did was add another male.
OK, I'm going to say this. If you bait in a cave, there's
usually a part that, yeah, there are bats and it's stinky.
The bats are not stinky. It's just the ground part where
the bats sleep. Where they don't clean up.
Their and poop in the same place.
That's not good. I agree with you, that is the
stinky part. But but go come on.
But there are so. Are you like a bat in that you
don't clean up your shit? That's not the point right now.
Yet. We're getting to the play on
cleanly. Hey wait a minute I am the only
character that's even talked about my shit.
Do you guys clean up your like what is going on?
We're Cobalts, this is D and DI shouldn't have popped this up.
We use the cobalt latrine like normal cobalt.
I don't. I don't like.
Hanging from the roof and poop on the floor.
It's cannon, I don't wipe. Butt soft.
Oh no. OK bad ecosystem.
Just like I'm sure Cobalts are to the ecosystem.
OK, if there's a magical guy named Attrick then I feel like
Cobalts can ship in a cave. Yes I I I I agree it is
important to the ecosystem that I don't wipe 100%.
Nobody said anything about that. No one said anything about
wiping. No, I did, and then I don't and
then I don't do it. Why is that being Oh?
OK, I have a quick cue. I have I have a non.
I have a quick cue about the winged cobalts.
Are they why burns and that there's no hands?
Or are they Dragons and. Dragons.
OK, I just realized I wasn't sure if I actually had you.
Know it's with wings. So Gareth, as far as the Kobo's
can tell, doesn't have any wings because he hasn't tried to fly
yet. Oh, that's right.
He doesn't just have his wings. That's.
Right, like spectral wings. Low key, yeah.
Native lightning, that. Yeah.
Terrifying part of me is like, they burn holes in your clothes
and that's why you don't like to use them very much.
Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Yeah.
You know, that's, that's a new layer.
I like that. That means you probably can't
wear chainmail, because then what row?
You just bust through that shit. You have to get like magic.
Magic ones that won't turn into a little sausage cooked up in
the mail. Can I get breakaway chain mail?
Do you know, like the pants? That.
Have the yeah, just playing them, yeah.
Or you just have little holes right where your wings live and
all your clothes. There you go.
Yeah. Also possible you're very
susceptible to backstabbing. So you want to put a hole?
In my arm everywhere. Fairpoint.
Hello I'm Josh and I'm playing Gareth Mogford, a Ranger and a
dragonborn at the same time but also a Vampire Slayer.
And a guy Hunter. So many layers.
And also a cool guy. Expert.
Vampire Slayer. Yeah, a guy.
I killed the. Coolest The coolest guy the.
Cool guy, Hunter, Yeah. I'm just killing.
The guys, what's the biggest responsibility that Gareth has
ever been put in charge of? Oh yeah, this is this is good
stuff too, because you're playing a real character.
Yeah, you need. To learn a little.
Bit about Gareth these. Guys are real too.
Real killable. Yeah.
I can't wait to pass this character off to Gabe to play
for the rest of forever. I'm pretty.
Excited I'm more. Kobold.
He's. Got so many I'd say like his
biggest responsibility ever is probably just kind of feeling
the mantle of responsibility over his family's legacy
probably since they're all gone now he's the last one in his
mind. His main goal is to get revenge
for them in honor of them. So I think that's probably his
big weight on his shoulders as he goes around.
You know, that's like his big his big thing that.
Would be pretty consuming. Got to get that Peter guy.
Yeah, Peter. Don't forget about Peter.
Peter the Vampire. Peter the vampire.
He needs a. Last name Nelson the Dragon.
Yeah, there's no last name in the ads.
But that's not it. Peter The.
Vampire with the last name Dracula.
Dracula, that's what it was his last.
Name. Dracula.
Name his. First name is count.
Yeah, count. His name?
It. Says.
Title. I don't actually one drag,
that's the station first name's count.
Yeah, we don't have a last name written here for Peter.
Yeah, just Peter PETYR. Yeah, that's all I've got.
I don't think Marjorie's nemesis that's the last thing either.
That kid that I you. Have a nemesis?
The kid you. Killed that you already?
No. Marjorie.
No, that kid's dead. I don't care about that.
The kid that the. Forest Children.
No, the kid, the kid, the guy that I like, he took the blame
for the things that I did when I was an urchin.
Your. Dad.
No. I thought that.
Was my uncle. Uncle Karma.
No, it's Godfrey. Godfrey is the name of the kid
that I, the fellow urchin Martin, let's take the blame for
for stealing Earl Granger's pinky.
Right. So he didn't have a last name
either. His name is just and Zogg Moth.
His name is just Zogg Moth. I made that.
I just made that shoot up. They'll be crazy if my uncle was
Zagmouth all along. My gosh, it's a family business.
Never say never. Got enough family businesses?
Already, which leaves it to me. Hello everybody, I'm Theodore
Stringer, the Dungeon Master and the player of Nelson Attrick and
any of the other characters that we put names to during the
course of the session. So when last we we met the the
party here y'all were cobolds and and trying to figure out the
Merchant of Venice and you'd made a friend a big triple size
cobold. Yeah.
To join you in your in your cast.
Yeah, our Porsche, Yeah. The dual cast, right?
You guys took that that show back to The Cave and you were so
good that your pseudo DoD the dragon Nelson rolled in and and
gave you a Dragon Quest. But that was then.
Now it is. Say it's a day a day later and
you are. Up in a.
Tree on the edge of the forest, looking across the road at the
other forest. Among these among our theatrical
cobalts. Any of you climb trees?
I'd say 1 Cobalt can be up in the tree with the Ranger
enjoying this lookout. I could fly into a tree, yeah.
Fly up there but though. That's got to be E.
Super simple. Yeah, OK.
So you can you can find Gareth are up in the tree Yes, looking
across because. And we're looking sorry from
like the deciduous forest into like the coniferous 1, correct.
There's like a silent, if I recall, a silent coniferous 1.
On silent coniferous forest, on the on the western mountains,
awesome good memory, because Nelson has given you, has given
you a quest. He has told you that some
something, something bad, some sort of terrible happening is
going on in the coniferous forest.
And while it was contained within the coniferous forest,
you know, fine their business, whatever, but it is whatever's
happening over there is now starting to seep into and infect
the Dragon's forest. And it hasn't like punctured
deep enough in to get to the the swampy area in the middle that
the dragon calls his like official domain.
But it is a problem that could get out of hand if left sort of
alone. So at this point, here's a
here's a capable Ranger dragon shaped.
Here's a Dragon Quest for the dragon shaped Ranger.
And here's some dragon shaped minions Dragon Quest.
Quest. I'm a long take my hand.
We're all just dancing at the bottom of the tree while they're
actually looking out drag. Perception checks from the
bottom of a tree. Also perception checks from the
from up in the tree, but for different reasons.
OK. Double O.
Gosh, I won't lie, I didn't even open up my dice jar because we
didn't use them last time. I felt like a fool throwing them
out. God.
Damn, Duckett's is good at his job in the theater and at
perceiving. That's a natural 20.
Hey. Get this, Hey, get this.
I also have a natural 20. We're a good team.
Dude, I'm up on your shield. Like looking out.
How do you use already? Do you use already pluses to
perception on these? Skills.
There's a little thing called skills if it says plus, like
mine actually says perception plus zero because I have a
wisdom -2 but a? My passive perception is 8, but
it doesn't have. A if it doesn't say anything in
skills and you just add whatever it says with your wisdom
modifier. So mine would be -2 Which one
are you OK? Winged Cobalt doesn't even have
a skill. OK, yeah, then you are -2 OK. -2
so. I rolled a 15 but a -, 1 so got
a 14. Well then I got a one.
I didn't see nothing. Oh my God, Eve.
Saw a butterfly. Eve was.
I actually saw a butterfly and I haven't seen one before I saw
I'm looking at that. Yeah, OK, so Eve is facing the
butterfly up the tree. What color?
What color is the butterfly? This is important.
Light blue. I love it.
Yeah, I rolled A3 and if it's -2 then that's a one, right?
It's. A dirty 1.
Yeah. You don't see those very often.
Butterflies are really cool, can I say?
Don't see those very often either, apparently.
Yeah, right. It's we're not smart.
Gareth, have you made a perception check?
Yes, yeah, it's 8. 8. OK, Yeah.
We're both up in the tree, just not saying.
Anything days are. Butterfly.
Too. Supposed to be like a hunter.
But you know, our Ranger has terrible perception.
It's plus four. I just rolled A4.
Gosh, that's great. Wait, butterflies are really
beautiful these days and what can I say?
I. Was looking at a different one,
yeah. Duckets though.
We're going. To roll into this without I'm, I
haven't looked at stat blocks or anything, but we're just going
to see what happens. Oh God, we're.
Going to die. Bye guys.
Been good being eep. I'm going to be next.
I'm going to be Jeep Eeps. Good.
Luck. Good luck, Gareth, because.
You're going to take the longest to die.
Between every episode Gareth goes back and gets 4 new
Cobolts. Oh my God.
I would actually find the four of you trying to play the ROTC
Cobolts instead very funny. All dragon Shields.
I'm I'm Jeep, but I'm like one of these.
Testosterone. Fueled over.
Yes, OK, right and dying. OK, so Eep sees a butterfly and
chases it right up a tree up the branch just away.
Oh, yeah. Gareth, you're looking across
the road and this forest, we're going to say it's around like
2:00 PM But this forest, it looks like it's probably 7:00 or
8:00 PM over there. It's like there's just a Gray
shadow over top of it. And it's not that cloudy out
there. Is there is a bad air about
about that forest with an 8? I can't give you a whole lot of
the why it's bad, just that you have a bad vibe about it.
The the road itself, it looks like a fairly well tended Rd.
Perhaps the western side is more overgrown than the eastern side.
Maybe in the distance you see what looks like like a hedge of
grass making its way across the forest further down, and then
you know, it slopes away up into the hill where deck room is
sitting. You can't see deck room from
where? From where we're at right now.
Make a Dexterity saving throw. Is that just Gareth?
That's just Gareth. Tough time up in this tree.
Not a lot of places to jump to. I got a 13.
OK, with a 13, it just so happens that up in this tree is
where the next round of this horrifying pressing sensation
that we've sort of been having from, you know, over the course
of this this adventure, since you started making your way in
this direction, it suddenly presses upon you.
And as you have moved W, it has gotten stronger.
And this is the strongest 1 yet. So strong, in fact, that I
requested a Dexterity safe to prevent you from falling out of
the tree because all of your instincts tell you to, you know,
get down, be out of sight, hold your breath so that they don't
know that you're there, whoever they are.
But with your 13, you do not fall out of the tree.
You go right down to it, to the the limb that you're on.
I think maybe even you. You swing underneath the limb of
the tree hanging on with your arms and your legs, and you look
down to see the three Cobalts on the ground, because two of them
have noticed a problem. Oh yeah, Meerkat Styles.
I'm up on his shield. Meerkat styles, The two of you
have realized that what appeared to be a thicket of bushes that
you guys pressed through to get to this tree is now moving and
has strategically inched around to form a hedge surrounding you
guys and from the hedge have emerged little unfriendly
looking plant monsters. Yeah, like I imagine this the
centers of a hedge, you know, with no with no shrubbery kind
of coming out of. The they're coming out of the
Yeah, I'm. Not going to lie when you.
First described the hedge. I thought you said that it was
moving and so I was already imagining a moving hedge and
then you basically went and it's coming to get you and.
It's. Coming to get you?
Oh boy. Well, I pop off the shield and
get down behind butt butt soft. So yeah, I think as of this
moment, the two of you, Buttsoft and and Duckett's have noticed
the the the twigs, the plant monsters.
Do we get an advantage on our initiative or a surprise attack
or something from this noticing? And.
I'm going to yell plant monster. Plant Monster.
I would say advantage on initiative.
Yeah, I and are not surprised. I rolled the 10 both times.
Mine's going to be oh you said advantage.
Thank God. Much better. 16 or butt soft?
I got a 12. That's a 14 for bite.
Am I doing this too? Where am I?
I know I'm much open. Up from the.
Tree, we're up here. You here below you butt soft
yelling plant monster plant monster guys guys.
I'm just looking at Barfly out. It's the rocks all over again.
Listen, the rocks was a ploy by
my brother. This was just a bad wall.
Dropped a dropped a reference image into the important
pictures for you guys. Yeah, nasty little wooden twig
lights. Hell yeah.
Oh. Skilly.
Eep is afraid, but Eep doesn't
know yet, so. Eep's rolling initiative against
the butterfly. It's so.
It's just so beautiful. The butterfly should roll
initiative to get away from EEP. I'll roll the Dicks.
Butterfly here and I'm. Here and I'm hungry.
I'm hungry. You feel hooking the butterfly
in a dex contest. I'm having my own challenge
against branches, but these are just the branches of the tree
that I'm trying to get around to get to the butterfly.
I got a 18. OK, you're first.
No, I don't like that. I'm going to I'm going to take
one, one round of the three Cobalts that noticed and the
blights and then you'll be first.
So in that case, but is first. Butt is going to pull out his
spear and he's going to start stabbing.
How? How far away are we from the
closest one? Are they fast?
They're slow. This is like the ham all over
again. Violence.
Probably. Let's say you're 20 feet from
the closest one. This is my production, I need
everyone to survive. I cannot recast this at this
point. Get a boss.
I'm ready to be Jeep. Jeep is in the wings.
Are there two of them or is there like groupings of them,
like how many are around us? With a natural 20, the hedge
itself is like rippling with them.
No, no, no. No.
So I also had an after 20 so I also noticed that and I don't
like it. I think we should try and push
through maybe? Does anyone here have fire?
Yes, I have fire. OK, wonderful.
I'm going to just move. Can I ready an action to?
Intercept the first one that starts moving in on my friend
bite. Yeah, yeah.
I'll just. Swing it.
Whoever comes in to bite, comes that bite.
OK, well, great, because bites. Next bite.
What kind of what kind of fire can you put out?
I have chromatic bolt which I can do twice.
This cobalt makes 2 dagger or chromatic bolt attacks.
OK, 2. Chromatic bolt attacks.
A turn. Nice.
And I can choose from acid, coal, fire, lightning, poison or
Thunder. But I think if these are twigs,
fires the way to go. Makes perfect sense to me.
OP Cobalt over there. I guess it's probably good he
didn't get to do the pyrotechnics during the show
because it probably would have been bad.
It's like Crazy Harry and the Muppet Show.
That's who I pictured you look like, but a little, yeah.
Yeah, so that first attack is a 16.
That hits 2D6. So that's a 2 D 6 + 2, which was
12 points of damage. Towards that Bush.
OK, OK, so. Mike can't help but build a tank
and everything. Yeah, I said you.
Know he's a sorcerer. Yeah, fun.
Fact, These these little guys have a total of four hit points.
Oh my. God.
Vaporized. Oh my God.
Yeah, you know, you fire off. What do you how are you doing
this? Do you have like a an implement?
Do you shoot it out of your hands?
Are you trying to breathe it per se?
What's your? Yeah, I think chromatic bolt is
like pointed finger like so he points and it shoots out of his
like creepy long lizardy fingernailed finger.
EW, yeah. You put out a finger and you you
took it just so and you shoot out a bolt of fire that just
punches through this. This dig.
And shoots into the hedge behind it, which erupts into flame.
Forest fire Smokey. Yeah, you show that, Morris.
Can prevent evil plants. I think in this case it's good.
I think we. Should do it.
It's not like we're Harry merchants.
It's fine. All right.
Of is of course deeply unhappy about being set ablaze, and you
can see it, you know, different arms and things.
All right, so I still have a second attack. 00.
Yeah, crush it it. Start it definitely is making a
hole. All of the different, all of the
blights are trying to move away from the point of impact of this
fire. And you can see the ones that
have come out of the hedge, which there's a lot of them, but
now, now you know that they are, they are fairly squishy.
I'd say that there are probably how many of you are there?
There's five of you. I'd say there's probably 20 or
so of these little guys coming out of the.
Fuck, that's a lot. Of guys.
It's a lot, but you put out enough damage to to kill six of
them all at once. Well then you're you're really
not going to like my second role because it's an AT20.
Jesus. Christ.
Don't even need anybody else. I think that you learned from
your first shot and just are like, oh, we can just shoot the
hedge. It's a good typing matchup.
It's great. And that's 19 points of damage.
Just spun and hit the other corner of the edge so the fire
spreads around both sides of the circle, yeah.
It's just moving around the circle.
Nice. OK, so now there is there's
hedge hedge flavored chaos down here at the base of this tree.
And the all of the blights sort of, they all sort of turn and
look at you bite and then they all turn away from you and start
to try and and focus like you know anyone but him, I guess.
I think you should be dragging Blessed next for sure.
Not that guy. And Bite is just giddy that he's
getting you to use fire, so he's just laughing like a mad, yeah.
He's got the son of this pocket. Oh my God.
With a with a 19, you've definitely obliterated chunks of
hedge. And I'm going to say that the
fire also got four more of the guys that were nearby that
impact site when I when you did that.
So there are now 19 of the blights, which makes it the
blights turn. I think three of them are are
close enough to attack ducats and four of them are close
enough to attack but. Mr. Soft.
Mr. Soft, Mr. Soft. Mr. Mr. Soft was my father.
You can just call me Mr. Soft. You can just call me Butt.
Mr. Soft was my father. Call me.
Butt. So they're going to come in and
make 3 claw attacks. It's totally possible.
It'll be OK, just got to believe.
I thought I was at least going to get to do something, but we
can't die until the main characters come back.
I jumped off of the shield and then got fucking ate by these
bushes. Let me add them.
Let me at least. Two of them.
Two of them hit. I just got the kissing booth
vest. On.
Yeah. Is it a leather vest?
Because technically that's leather armor.
Can I get the benefits of leather armor because of its
vest? Can I please have 13 AC rather
than 12? I'll.
Give you the benefits of of leather armor for that.
They just tear it to shreds. Yeah, they do.
Yeah. Vintage.
You take 5 slashing damage. Oh.
OK. How are you?
Doing how much health I'm. Alive more than 5.
Thank God. Four of them are after, four of
them are after. Mr. Soft 2 misses.
What's your AC, Mr. Soft? 15.
OK, two hits for Mr. Soft. I'm ready, yeah.
You catch you catch 2 of them on your shield and are starting to
push them back when you feel the other two cutting across your
back for four damage. That's fine.
I don't even. I don't even seem affected by
it. Way fine.
Eep, make a Dexterity check. Plus 3/13.
Nice. You catch the hell out of that
butterfly, stuff it right in your mouth.
It tastes delicious, it's crunchy and Google inside.
Yeah, go and. Then you hear them.
Below you you. Look down and there's.
And there's just like butterfly where you sticking out of my
mouth. Oh, wait.
But. Nasty.
But before we get to what you do, it's It was important to
note whether or not you caught that butterfly, but.
It was. The Ranger actually goes first.
Wait, what about duckets? Oh yeah, you got a 12.
Garrett's got duckets. Does get a first bit.
What do you got? Duckets.
I just want to say no boss, and I want to throw, I want to reach
into my sack and I'll throw a bottle of alchemist fire at the
four around butt soft. OK, I'm loyal till my last
breath if anything. OK, let's see to hit with a
vile. I do.
What I do wonder is how do you get the force surrounding him
and not him also? I just throw it at the group of
them. My my thought in the in the end
is that I'm just throwing it at one of them because it's not
actually like. A group target.
Thing. Yeah, it's a single target
thing. Give it to me.
OK, but if you fail, you hit him.
Well, I got a 16 to hit. Oh, hell yeah.
All right. And it deal, and it deals 3
damage, 3 fire damage, and it's lit on fire at the start of each
of its turn. Actually, it takes damage.
It goes up immediately. It flails.
I think it topples into the one next to it.
So the two that the two that that Mister soft that butt was
holding off on his shield, one of them immediately goes up in
flames and is dead and topples into the second one and the
second one is starting to catch. They don't.
Neither of them take damage, yet they take damage at the start of
their turn. Cool, so he's not dead, just on
fire. Yeah, yeah, he's just on fire.
Now it's Garrett's turn. OK.
So Garrett's up top, he's looking down seeing all this
happening with the hedge stuff looks like fires effective.
I think Garrett's going to try and use his breath weapon for
the first time here. So he's going to he's going to
unleash his lightning like attack, but he has he unhitches.
His jaw and torques, the glaring.
I can even do it in a 15 foot cone or a 30 foot line or.
I think yours is a line attack. Yeah, it's one or the other
depending on what your color of dragon is.
I love cutting between this like crazy action and E playing
stalking a butterfly and like trying to get close to it and.
I can't get to a very happy music.
And then like these. Branch monsters are getting
absolutely obliterated by the party.
Fire everywhere, a beam of lightning cutting through the
clearing. Yeah.
And Godzilla over here. Yeah, straight up, straight up,
nuclear lizard. Everything plus he's holding on
from a branch. He just kind of arcs his hand
and goes. It does.
Make that sound, yeah. But yeah, that's my plan.
I'm going to do the old the old 30 foot line attack and it says
that each well, I have to roll the hit first before we even do.
Isn't it? Is it not a saving throw?
Oh no, it is a saving throw. My bad.
The DC's 8 plus. My Constitution modifier. 8
plus, so that's 11. Yeah, 11.
Great. OK, OK.
And is the save half damage or is it a complete dodge?
The save is half damage, yeah. Half, half damage.
OK, for the for the plot, we can say you're less than 30 feet up
in this tree. Oh cool, thanks.
I think as far as you know in future, tactically a line attack
is best when you're on the ground.
You are going to absolutely obliterate one or two of these
dudes though. OK, cool.
I'll take it. I will roll on saves.
How constituted are these guys plus one?
Do you focus on the dudes around me or the OR the dudes around
Ducats or the dudes around soft butt?
Butt soft. Definitely butt soft.
Protect the boss. That's right.
OK, those two dudes rolled AA10 and a critical failure
respectively. Oh.
Oh, a 10 you say? Yeah, so 2 failures, full
damage. Let's see 2D10.
Oh man. Oh. 8.
Perfect. Yeah, so lightning damage and
fire damage are different, but it's not important in this
instance because more than five damage of any sort murders these
fools. So I don't know if anyone
actually sees this because it takes place behind butt soft.
I'd see it. You'd see it so you I.
Hear a strike of lightning and the two behind me are dead.
Yeah, I don't think either of you see that it comes from
Gareth, but you see just a bolt of lightning or like a column of
lightning shoot down and and just phase through leaving big
smoking holes in the two in these two blights and they just
topple over behind butt soft. I look into my bag like I don't
think I threw that. That's that's why I have
religion. I got you, boss.
We move back to butt soft. I got to run over to my
assistant. I'm going to start swinging, not
at my assistant, at the trees around.
It. That's what I was thinking for a
second. No boss.
I'm sorry, is there a time to turn?
On each other. I love.
The idea of like as soon as the those monsters are dead he just
like immediately starts. Being first of my multi attack
is a filthy 20, I'm just going to go ahead and roll the second
attack. The second attack is a natural
20. I really, I really wish that I
wasn't burning these natural 20s so early.
You said The Dirty 20 and a natural 20.
Yep, sure is. So the second the second one
just automatically dies. So I'm going to roll the damage
for that one. That one just toast.
There's no way I can fail that if it's a 5 of any type.
Second one, first one is going to take also five damage.
Nice. OK, what do you got?
You got a spear? Yep.
Yeah, you because these guys are also like they're like a little
smaller than you guys. So it's it's fun and different
for you to be fighting something smaller than you.
And you get to you know, you you bat the burning, the burning
blights out of the side off to the side.
You run up to your assistant, you jam your spear all the way
through the the 1st. Cobalt.
Or not Cobalt, sorry. No.
Boss. Sorry, Duncan, the.
First flight and you you twist your spear up and fling him away
and you swing the back of your your your spear and you knock
the the head clean off the the other one just push it down with
your shield. We.
Do the cool tough guy like hand clasp?
And it looks really good because you're shredded.
Ripped. Cobols, there's fire all.
Around everyone in this. Party is super RIP.
We're all so strong. We're currently still being
attacked. Coolest thing ever.
Coolest thing ever my film, Sir. What?
Fresh horrors do you have in store?
I can choose to take out my daggers at this point, or I can
just do chromatic bolts again. If it's.
Not broken. Don't fix.
It yeah, I think I'm just going to continue with the chromatic
bolts and we will continue are. You after the blights?
Are you after the hedges? Can roll initiative for the
hedges. I guess I'm I'm after the
hedges. Nice OK blastering chromatic
bolts into them. 17 for the first one, and that is eight
points of damage. Awesome.
Another another section of the hedge is now on fire.
I think from where Garrett is hanging, he can see that the
portions that are on fire are starting to retreat from the
base of the tree where you guys have been surrounded.
There are now many holes in the hedges.
All right, I'm going to attempt to make another hole in the
hedge with a 14. A-14 will do it.
That is 12 points of damage. Wow.
Yeah. I mean, 12 points of damage to a
hedge vulnerable to fire. There's more fire than hedge, I
think. Now, I was going to say on their
turn that they are. They were going to vomit forth
some more blights to for you guys to fight on their way out,
but I don't. I don't think that that's
exactly viable anymore. I don't know that there's enough
wood all all together in one spot to generate any more and
more of these little fellas. I would say level up but I don't
know how. The hedge surrenders and we
accepted surrender. The hedges are surrendering the
The blights, though, are not. The two on fire ones take 3 fire
damage. Make that. 6 fire damage and
they are dead. Ducats feels alive.
So I take this 19 down to 15. OK, the remaining blights are
attempting to surround ducats and but I think each of them.
OK, wait, but there are a total, I think there are a total of
eight attacks coming in if you want to you.
The in that's rough. Yeah, if you want to, you can
have it so that Duckett's only takes two of those attacks.
Yes. Please is that as few as I can
make him take can take it take 10?
Or how many attacks can I make Duckett take?
If you want to, you can take 6 to 2.
If you want to roll for it, you could take more than that.
I'll roll for it. I'll try to take more.
OK, what's this based on? Constitution, I would say.
I like that. It's a.
Another filthy 20. Wow.
OK, I'm I'm locking. In but soft.
Duckets, are you doing OK? Are you like injured but OK?
Are you not doing so hot I'm. Bleeding, but I'm I'm OK, I'm
bleeding and breathing but like I don't know if it's yeah, I'm
bleeding. I don't know that I'm breathing
too hard yet. It's been 6 seconds of combat. 6
seconds of combat you you see the blights brushing up on you
and then you feel butt softs hands on your shoulder just
jamming you down on into the ground as what seems like a
whole hedge of lights just jumps on him.
Now I'm going to have to roll a bunch of dice.
What a boss. Is he taking all 8?
He is. All 8.
Thanks boss. Hey they get +3 to hit.
What's your AC15? Yes, my AC is 15.
OK, that's four hits in a crit. Oh boss.
Or a total of. It'll be fine.
I hope he's got a chunk of health.
I just. On average I'm fine.
It could spike though Gabe might be spiking.
Oh dear, we're taking Duckett's home in a bucket.
Voss, you mean spillover damage goes to Duckett so we both die.
Oh God, I. Think you end up taking 26
damage? Oh, I'm fine.
Oh. I mean, I'm not like, great, I'm
way more than half. I'm way lower than half, but you
know, I'm still up and kicking. Wow.
Thank you, boss. I would have.
Yeah, for sure. Yeah.
No, no, no, no problem. Three of them rolled Max damage.
Wow, yeah, it would be more fine if Gabe wasn't spiking, but on
average I'm fine. I'll ask, you're in this tree.
A lot has happened and finally you are aware.
I thought I was eating, but I was eating the butterfly.
We've circled back around to the point where you have finished
eating the butterfly and see everything going on down here.
He's fucking last standing over the top of my body.
Perhaps you were distracted from your your butterfly munching by
the beam of actual lightning that emerged from.
The. Notice that things are not as
they once were down below. What do you do?
Wow, yeah. I don't like, I don't think I
have any. I'm not carrying weapons.
I'm scared. How many more little creature
guys are left? Blight.
Dudes. There are 15 of them A.
Bunch of them. OK, OK, then I am going to oh,
what am I? OK, I'm going to look is there
like a, if there's anything I can like big and heavy I can
drop onto one of the blights. I want to do that.
I want to like fly and drop something on them like I like
I'm in a tree. Is there like a big branch?
You don't have anything on your person per SE, but the the big
cobalt has a huge backpack of stuff that could be, you could
probably, you know, grab something out of there and drop
it on them. Yeah, OK.
Cooking pot. Steel mirror.
It's a lot of torches in here. Hi.
Looking through my inventory. Oh.
I'll take a torch, I'll take a
torch and I'll light it and I'll drop it on one of the flights.
Hey, yeah. I'm big on this because girth.
Girth is already hanging from a branch and you just scuttle
down. Think deep cut.
This is black cauldron. I am girky going through Black
Cauldron like the girky going through his pack stealing his
apple. It is, it is similar, except
that it's it's upside down. All all a pair of big dis
disgruntled bats because he's hanging from the tree and all of
a sudden you're hanging from him from his backpack upside down.
Just like digging around. Stuff's falling out.
Sorry. But you managed to get you
managed to get a torch and the tinderbox out of there and and
set it. Set the torch alight and then
hook it down onto On the combat below, make a range attack roll.
Drop rock attack roll. OK, well I rolled the 9:00 so at
least it hits 96 + 3. OK, I usually do magic so this
is exciting. Dropping torches and stuff.
It's a three. Oh, plus three and a six.
I think you you lob it down and it ends up is a great throw from
upside down on this tree. It ends up torch part streak
into a into one of these blights and it it goes up in flame and
starts sort of wildly making for an exit to the clearing before
it collapses. Duck it's you're on the ground.
You're your boss has just taken a heroic set of hits for you.
Yeah, I want to roll out from under my boss and grab a vial of
acid and huck it at the group in front of his shield.
He's just held off. Like, I mean, I don't know if
held off is the right verb, but to me it looks like he's just
held off all these guys. So, you know, the acid is much
the same. I'm just hucking it at the
group. It doesn't have like a spread
hit on it but does a nine hit because that's what I rolled.
The last A9 does not hit. Heard, then it shatters onto the
ground. Unfortunate for.
My boss, but probably, hopefully the ground.
No, just the ground. Why would you say?
Why would you say that? You guys are right next to each
other, you'd have to roll like a 2 or less to hit him from where
you're standing here. Well, cracks my knuckles hold.
Gareth, you've been in this tree for like kind of a while now
with all this combat going on. Going to stay up here, going to
come down and join things. Looks like they've got it
handled, kind of maybe. Am I still dangling from his
backfash? Can I make the collective
decision to jump down with Eve, like clinging to the the bag and
we do like a little screaming attack from the tree?
Yeah, but. Wait, I've got wings?
Why am I screaming? I'm dumb.
I mean, I have wings too, but yeah, you could.
But I I don't but. It's not.
Yours. But I don't.
I'm dumb. I'm a dumb little lizard.
I don't know. I don't think of it.
Awesome. OK, Yeah.
He's just like holding on, like, you know how like he's.
Just caught up in the moment. Yeah, he's just like perched
Heep. 'S mouth still tastes like
butterfly. It's all good.
What going on for us, little brain?
We're going to do we're going to make another I think you're
going to make a ranged attack just sort of a how to get my
trajectory onto onto these things yeah.
How have we done crash damage before I.
Don't remember like like falling to crush someone else damage but
you could all always utilize the fall distance like D.
Yeah, it is AD sixes per 10 feet, right?
Yeah, yeah, as extra crush damage.
So what we're going to do is the the most possible, the most
possible blights you can land on is 8 is the 8 that are are right
up on Duckett's and Bite. I think if you roll and 18 or
better, you can get all 8 and then less than that is less.
If you roll A1 you will land on the Cobalts.
Naturally. If you roll A2 through a four,
you land in the acid, sure. OK.
Oh. And you will deal.
You will deal 3D6 crush damage to anyone you land on.
And. You could end the prologue right
now. You could kill me. 1.
Swift move. And you will take a quarter of
that damage regardless. You could end the prologue right
now and not really feel it. That's the goal, OK.
Just part of my tragic back story.
I got but well. OK.
So I think you land on four of them.
All right. OK rule. 3D6. 13 damage.
Nice. Yeah, you crush them into
kindling. Yes.
Pancake. And you take what, 4 damage for
that? Yeah.
EP will also take 4 damage. Yeah, what?
Did I take for it? You forgot you have the wings.
That's. Like half of.
I know, I know. I'm like half dead now.
What is my half 7? Oh man.
Sorry, you did a good job though.
Oh my. God, Jeep and jackets are next.
I cough. I cough up a little piece of
butterfly wing. Butt soft.
Your big butt kill. Me.
It's so potentious. I'm sorry.
Butt Soft is going to see this righteous maneuver.
Yeah, there are 10, I think 10 blights remaining.
I think I'm going to go over to because now I think we've sort
of stabilized the situation over here with Duckett's and I'm I'm
going to go join the fray with our much larger, much less
injured friend and also try and protect the flying Cobalt over
here. So I'm going to go, I'm going to
go former former rank over there with them and I'm going to
strike out at the 2 closest dudes.
Oh, you don't have to move far because he jumped on the ones
right in front of you. So exactly, I'm just going to
shift my focus is what is what, what we're doing here.
Does anyone have passive perception above 10?
No. No.
I have a ten, the first one's
going to miss for sure and the second of wait I have pack
tactics. Hold on.
Oh yeah. It's still a miss for sure.
And then the next part of my multi attack.
OK, 11th. Does an 11 hit.
Alas, it does not. OK, then I go over there and I
was like, that was really cool. And then I swing, but I miss
both times. The end.
Next up is bite.
OK, I'm going to continue with what works.
Oh, I don't know if you yeah, you're not going to be able to
see it, but it's a not 20 and Max damage.
Oh. Wow, and that's 12 damage
doubled is 24 + 2 is 26 points. 26th is.
What are you? Are you shooting at the group
that's around Gareth? Are you trying to pick off
stragglers? I'm going to shoot at the group
that's next. To Gareth and now Butt soft.
OK, you definitely the fireball. Cause like 26 damages, so much
damage to try and just be like all right this hits one guy.
I think the the blossom of this. Easily catches.
The next guy you outright kill 2 and there is a third who is now
on fire. Is the best I can give you for a
single a single target. That's OK.
Stupendous, that is down. To 8.
Got 2. Attacks though.
Yeah, so there's still. Second go.
Oops. Oh, that may be my first mess
because that is a that's a nine and nine's not going to do it.
Yeah, so that. Zappa fire goes.
Goes wild. He was too excited from the
first one. And you're still in the midst of
your your victory dance. And you.
Pop one off and it just arcs off into the trees.
Ducats. You notice.
That the the blight that took the torch from the heap threw
down. It's dead, but that torch is
still burning. Yeah.
Yeah, I was thinking about that too.
That's an. Interesting.
Is anyone on Ducats right now or did he take all of them off?
He took all of them off and then I rolled away.
He took all of them off. Yeah.
So I'll run over there.
I'll try to. Sword in the stone that torch
out of the blight and then, you know, come over and aye aye, get
back get back to the group in front of you know, swiping
sideways just trying to get get get one of them with the torch
group in front of both Garth and butt soft.
That would be a plus. I'm going to use.
Should I use my dagger or do I use to attack with this?
Sure, 17 to hit nice D4, Sure 3 plus.
My bonus? If I if it's dagger, it's
dexterity, which is five. If it's strength, it's -2 which
is one. OK, Well then we're just going
to go we're. Going to go with the flat. 3
fire damage which kills this one and.
Then make an. Intimidation check, I think
since you're you're doing sort of a warding.
Them off. Kind of.
It's natural 18. Hey, hey, yeah -1 charisma -1.
But it seems to work. The the Blights want nothing to
do with the cobalt armed with a torch, especially not one that
blastered one of their number. And so you are you are hurting
them away. Are you doing this to the ones
that are up on Gareth? Are you trying to just sort of
move stragglers and things? Are you out in the field?
Yeah, no, I'm trying to ward off.
The group in front of Gareth and Butt Soft so they can like re,
you know, restructure themselves and come at the fight how they
want to rather than having to respond to the dudes right in
front of them. You know what I mean?
Gareth and Butt Soft, I would say you guys both get
opportunity. Attacks because of hell yeah the
one thing that these guys care about.
Is not being set. On fire burst attack is a 21.
OK. And I guess that's.
Probably all I get because. It's not.
Yeah, opportunity is not a is not an attack action.
Yep, it's going to be 6 damage. Good there's.
Another one gone down. To 6 I think.
There's only one left of this group.
That's around you guys and then there are five that don't seem
too keen on advancing anymore. We got attack action from
Gareth. Yes, yes, for opportunity, God.
19 dad hits to hit. OK, great.
OK, that would be. 8 damage perfect.
You shatter this. What are you attacking with?
I have a kusari Gama which is like the chainsickle.
Guy yeah, that's an interesting weapon to be.
Using against these guys, maybe, maybe you crush it with the
weight on the end, the sickle. The sickle's also great for.
Cutting down. Shrubbery.
Yeah, maybe it's like cutting down all his.
Little pans off and his little limbs.
Oh, actually I do like that. I like that you.
You take all of his limbs off and so he's just a torso and a
head. He's just like if it was a
cartoon. Audience.
Would love. Him he'd be.
So cute with two little eyes on the twig and I'm upset pointing
out. Roll a.
Perception check. All.
Right, that's for. One man.
No. All right.
Well, that's rough. That's.
Rough, buddy. Well, there's a lot of.
Fire and. Plants around.
Wait, no. Folks, there was something.
Yeah, most. Important.
What? Over my head?
Everything. Seems fine.
The remaining blights are in retreat.
You can definitely continue after them if you guys want to.
If so, it would be, it would be Garrett's turn.
I mean, probably not, right? Probably not, but.
Buckets is why I chase them. Off.
Anyone who wants to. But.
We can call this combat over what is what is the the initial
instinct among you guys. All right, that's fine with ape
literally have to rough. Kind.
Big cobalt do. You have any way of helping our
friend? To.
EEP. I don't know if EEP will be good
for the journey if they stay in that state.
Yes, I could cast. Your wounds on EEP and.
That might help a. Little bit, yeah.
But would you? Yes.
Yeah. Awesome.
Thank you I'll. Cast.
Cure wounds on little Eep. Gonna be like a full heel, yeah.
I think generally. Probably just let them run away.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. Go on, get.
Pretty scary. I put out the torch.
And I sheath it like a. Sword.
Cool, that was. Really cool.
Duckett's new. Preferred.
Weapon. The torch.
It's a lightsaber. It's cool.
So do you cast cure wounds? On on E, Yeah.
I'll cast cure wounds on E. Well, that beautiful.
D8. Plus something the wisdom mod
unless. You want to cast.
It as a level 2 spell I've. Got a 5.
Back up to full. Magically.
You are entirely restored. Thank you for your service.
I mean, you did. You did land on me, yeah.
And. I'm very sorry about that.
What happened again? I think there.
Are. Bits from.
From Garrett's pack, strewn around the around the base of
this tree, a couple torches, water skins, a couple stakes.
Gareth. As a Ranger.
And. Especially as a Ranger focusing
on the undead, You know, make a make a nature.
Make a nature. Check with advantage, you know
whatever I can tell you. With this dice roll right now,
I'm going to tell you as much as I possibly can.
I think that. Would be yeah, just 12.
You don't know. As much as you'd like, yeah,
right. You do nothing.
There. Nothing is a strong word 'cause
you. Are a scion of an ancient family
of vampire hunters and so as part of as part of growing up in
that life, you were forced to read or at least look at many a
musty tone about the the undead and their.
Various. Permutations, and what you can
recall from the the musty tomes about blights is that they are
usually the result of plants being afflicted by either a
curse or some sort of unwholesome necrotic miasma.
And they don't, they're not usually.
It's not like they themselves are like, they are entirely A
miasmatic creature. They were never just a regular
plant. They are like the spawn of these
infected tree ants, basically. The books actually call them
vampire trees. Whoa.
Oh shit. How much wait?
How does a tree become? A.
Vampire. Tree.
Bite it. By another.
Vampire. Tree wait is it is?
It can a. Vampire bite A.
Tree and the tree becomes a vampire tree.
Anything can come a vampire the the original legend.
Is that there was once a powerful such a powerfully evil
vampire that the state that was used to stake him grew into the
first undead vampire tree. That's cool, Dora.
That's rad. So.
It's probably not. That this original tree that did
this, but that would be crazy. We're up.
Against like, the ultimate vampire tree as much of little
lizards. Sorry, crocodiles.
Colin Nelson. Here's our CR. 12 Vampire tree.
V4 caimans no. But I think.
I think that's what you get from that is that these are probably
the spawn of some sort of larger immobile evil plant monster that
is, you know, trying to put out roots, expand its territory,
infect surrounding forests. And thinking back about the the
line of the, you know, the line of maybe it was hedge that was
crossing from 1 forest into another.
And perhaps there is an idea about where the all of this is
coming from. And that if you illuminate this
vampire. Tree.
Perhaps some of the threat to. Nelson.
'S forest will be abated. Well guys, I think we've done
it. Nelson sent us.
Out to kill off the the invaders.
And I put my foot up on like a carcass of one of the shrubs.
I said. I think we've done it.
Put my hand on my torch. Spit up some blood.
Yeah, jump off that, I feel. Great, we all go.
Around shrubs like. EP is like.
Running in place since he's been healed, he's like amped up even
though he did literally nothing. He felt he got, he fell from a
tree and was that on And that was his good contribution.
I I guess we go and rehearse. Now and all done.
Well, hold on, hold on. I I'm, I'm.
Not quite sure the what's my character?
'S name. EEP.
No. No, my, my.
Your merchant. What is my like?
Antonio Eep also doesn't know. I think he's the titular
character. He's the lead.
Yeah, What were you going to say, Gareth?
Well, I I. Believe that the the threats.
That we've. Been trying to face here is
quite over with. We have to find the source of
where they come from. But we killed the shrubs.
Look, they're on fire. Double.
Evil, yes, but they they spawn from an evil.
Vampiric tree and we have to go slaughter it.
Oh no, vampire tree. You can't stake.
A. Tree with a.
Wooden stake. Can you do you have to stake it
with an actual vampire? I've been so much pain.
Never thought about it like that.
No, wait. Wait, trees love.
Sunshine, how do you Not this one.
You're gonna kill it with a. Vampire is.
Awesome evil tree. Oh man, I believe you have to.
To. Burn it to the ground.
Oh, I can do that. I'm really.
Good at that, do you? Do you think the dragon?
Would be impressed. Nelson, Yeah.
Not if we come. Back without.
Killing the big. Tree probably correct.
OK, can we nap? First, Yeah, yeah, I'd like to.
Remake some of those vials I threw.
Too. Yeah, and I'd like to make some
disease. We do have a nice campfire right
here. It's true.
So are you guys saying short? Rest or long?
Rest here. Do I have hit dice?
How many hit dice do I have? 11 That's not enough.
That's. Not per day.
So I like I'd imagine that's per while I have time to fix it up,
but I don't know about and we're so much more powerful at night.
Maybe we rest until night. Well, right, it's it's early
afternoon. So.
Like if you say a long rest let's we could call it six
hours. Yeah 'cause we're little, we
don't need to sleep as much. The Adventure.
Resumes at midnight. Perfect.
The witching hour. I like that.
That sounds good. Yeah, I can replenish my.
Vials OK. I'm full health again.
That's feels great. OK.
And how are you duck it on health?
Full now. OK, after.
After a good rest, I. Feel great?
My bag's full again. Jangle, jangle, jangle.
Don't shake it too hard though, right?
You hear a pop and a little. Sizzle in there like.
That'll. Be fine.
Angry. Scorpion sounds he.
Peeks in he's. Like several.
Animals in this bag and acid. Most of the rest of the things.
Are different types of. Animals.
OK, cool. I I want.
I can't wait to see. Those come into play so with
with a fire going and the cobalts with their special
blight senses on watch you you creep back into the tree over
the course of this rest and you you have another look and you
see that the the hedge down in the distance to the north is
still there and thinking to yourself, they probably won't
attack us unless we get right in their way as they're crossing
the road here. But if we sort of stay off to
one side and follow them up their trail into.
The. Into the coniferous forest.
They should lead us right to this tree.
Seems simple enough. Nice.
The tree is immobile. It is.
You know, it's it's vulnerable to burning.
Seems like it should be easy. Maybe we come up with a.
Plan, plan the only thing you you've heard.
Other than the the way that it tries to because the the blights
themselves are what go and they try and, you know, infect other
trees. But this other than creating.
Blights. And attacking people, it can
reach this tree. The only thing it can do is it
can like put out a like an illusory fog as a thing that
you've you've heard it can do is that it can sort of try and mess
with your perception a little bit.
Well, if it's as easy as he says and it's just.
Sneaking through the bushes, We're all good at that.
We can sneak right up on this tree and burn it down like we
did those hedges. Easy.
Yeah, let's do that. Makes sense to me.
Yes, I can fly. And get a.
You know little. Top view and scope them out.
Oh yeah, I could give. We could.
Just bomb it from above like you could do your drop rock with one
of my alchemist fires right onto the tree.
Nuke it from here. Yes, that's not a bad idea we
could drop Gareth onto. It and have him just lightning.
Breath his way down yeah, I I could fly as.
Well, yeah, all. Right, all right.
I mean. It's news.
To you guys. What?
Yeah, we don't know that. Oh, I.
Forget because I never knew. By the way, I.
Can. Fly.
Oh, OK. Well, you learned.
Something new? About.
Somewhat every day, this guy. 'S.
Like a gun. I would.
Please, I would. Please.
Interest him and he's good at acting too.
How do I? Do it all we do need to get
back. To that though.
So yeah, I think I. Like this plan of going from
above. Yes, we can bomb it from wait.
Question. Yeah.
What's our priority level here? Is it help help Nelson or is it
do the play for the benefactors who also are doing stuff for
Nelson? Nelson is much bigger than any
of them. Nelson usurps the.
Benefactors. He's so much bigger.
Yeah, if. Nelson said go Ray Deckram.
It it does it, I would have to do it.
I don't wanna the. Benefactors.
I didn't know them. I wasn't here.
I don't know, they're really cool.
They killed a bunch of. US.
Yeah, but they did it in a really cool way.
And then they taught us. Culture, remember?
And they gave us industry to get us to leave us alone, Antonio.
And Antonio? That's.
Me. That's your.
Role. I didn't tell you though.
You sure are I? Can't.
I can't wait for this. Play Eve still got the script.
Is he wearing? The pointed hat this whole time.
Oh yeah, Princess Cat. OK, cool.
It's tied on. Oh yeah, a little winged moron.
Literally, yeah. So if you 2.
Fly above we could we? Three could sneak in from the
ground level and we could pincer attacked this vampire tree for
multiple sides. It'll be character.
Work, yeah. I hope that my character.
Lives me too, boss. OK, so we're going to.
Make. Our way into.
The into the road and come down until we are closer to this line
of hedge and and when we get closer to it, we can see that
like a like a giant fuzzy Caterpillar, it does seem to
slowly be moving its way from 1 forest into another.
I hate that and Gareth. Part of me wants to.
Stop doing these these horrible undead premonitions of yours
just because as soon as you hit the road, it's just kind of like
your your undead senses are tingling just all over the
place. Just the whole of the West and
South seems to have have some kind of some kind of vadnais
going on to it from where you're you're standing.
But now we make our way into the coniferous forest and I think we
need Let's go group Stealth Perception from Gareth or
Survival? Yeah, Stealth 18.
Or. Dirty 20.
Where would stealth fall under? Dexterity, Yeah.
That's a. That's a 14.
From bite 21 from. Gareth.
Oh nice. Excellent.
Mine's a natural 10. God.
That's A. That's a six for E.
Oh man, OK. Well.
The natural. One will will.
Will bank that my 6 my 6 feels a bit better.
And then perception from Gareth or?
Survival. Which?
Whichever. Which was it?
Oh, I did survival. And I got 21.
Cool. This forest is oppressive.
You can feel. The.
Weight of arboreal malice pressing down on you in here.
You. There's no.
I mean, it's midnight. So like you don't really.
Expect there to be a lot of birds, but there's plenty of
animals that do stuff at night. Not in here though this is.
A a silent forest. But not, I would say, a quiet
forest. No, no evidence of like, animal
life. But you can hear the creaking of
trees and you know, ancient wood, as if there was a strong
breeze going, but no breeze. All of the Cobalts.
You feel it. You feel.
The the intense need not to be discovered in here.
And you are, you're on the trail, you're you're following.
And I think you're perhaps you're maybe 2 minutes into the
edge of this forest when you hear huge footsteps coming
closer. Hide.
Hi Hide. Hide is good.
Hide is solid, yeah. Let us do that, yeah.
Eep is. Flying.
Up into into like a branch. To hide up.
That's it. Insane.
I'll go. I'll go high.
I think I'm gonna climb for this one.
So all of you, you all climb into a tree.
As you guys are reaching. Reaching.
Up into this tree, the the source of the sound emerges as a
huge. Wooden leg.
Steps out from between the two between trees and a a triant
emerges. Oh boy.
Though this is not like triants that you have.
Perhaps. Seen.
This is probably closer to how you would imagine a vampire tree
would look. Big wooden teeth.
Big. Wooden teeth seems.
Ripped in the bark with with glowing green SAP dripping,
dripping out from all over as it moves and twists.
The tree is moving. With a.
Steady pace. It doesn't seem to be coming for
you guys until the Nat one. The Nat.
One with my Nat. 20 Can I do anything to avoid?
This Nat one occurrence push boats off out of the tree.
I can't push my. Boss out of a tree.
I just can't. Do it OK.
Not one. What do you do?
Butt soft? What do you do?
How do you make a how do you make a big noise?
I probably see it and I just scream.
I'm just terrified. Like definitely push him out of
the tree. And then you hear it.
Fall from the. Tree.
Sorry. I couldn't if we're trying to
hide, but if he's just gonna do that, then I'll push him.
It's just so scary. It's terrifying how bubble
that's. Brutal.
That's just how it. Is.
That's. Just how it is.
Gosh. Just the culture thug.
Thud crash. Crash crangle out of the.
Tree, yeah, but you fall in the tree.
I would say 2D6 falling damage OK seems fair.
Six damage. I'll take that gracefully.
The. Tree.
Let me see if I can. There's a tree and it, it's, it
begins to to stomp out of the woods, tree limbs reaching
forward, tree feet ready to just step on butt and it.
And then there is just a series of horrible noises from the
forest. Oh dear.
The forest is suddenly alive with humanoid shrieks and
screams and groans as uh oh, rushing from the trees.
World. War Z style come innumerable
humanoid forms. Sorry, boss.
Which began leaping. Up upon.
The tree. And just scratching at it with
their hands and, you know, just, it's just a bunch of zombies
and. Ghouls.
Swarming and covering this tree to the point where it's hard to
see the tree other than like the crown and the leaves and shit.
Oh my goodness. And it you know it.
Flails. And maybe it makes like a low
groaning sound as it topples sideways under the weight of all
of these zombies. What do you guys do?
Try to not be in the way. Climb up a tree.
But not that one. Inconspicuous.
As. Possible.
I just like stay and watch the watch the fireworks.
Go down, stay still and apologize.
I get up, I'm ready to fly. Out of this tree and.
Bugger out anywhere else. You do that with your arms when
your. Wings are flapping too.
Yeah, yeah. When the tree finally stops
moving. All of the, All of the.
Zombies. All together, stop moving and
then, like stand up and start to, in a fairly orderly fashion,
file silently back into the trees.
Not our problem. One of the last ones.
As it's leaving. Pauses, turns towards your tree,
stares up at you guys, and then also leaves.
Double thumbs up a. Nope, nothing like that.
But yeah. Sorry, boss.
So we. Won.
You didn't lose. Can we go back?
Now, I mean, that wasn't the. Tree you guys were looking for?
Yeah, but it was a vampire tree. It should be.
Fine now, right? How much is the relationship
between? Butt and.
Yeah, I wanna say that. You.
Honestly, I'm not going to lie. To you, it was justified.
No boss understands. Oh, I was so scared.
I was, I almost, I mean, that was me.
Grace asking. That wasn't like.
E basking yeah this is but answering I almost shit in my
shorts. If you're never going to throw a
wrench into me and boss. 'S.
Relationship. Don't even quit trying.
That was me. I know it was.
An incredible. Team.
Eve. Doesn't.
Know his butt from. Anything I have yet to roll
above a 10. So far I'm pretty sure
everything has been closely except for maybe counting
catching that butterfly. Yes, I think the butterfly has
been my only good raw. It was like a 13.
That's. The priorities, you know, No, I
mean. It's.
Just a little lizard. We have like a three stooge
relationship I imagine. Where you know we can hit each.
Other way more than poke each other.
In the eyes, but we're. Best friends till the end.
We do, we do a strong man hand clasp just to prove it at the
bottom of the tree like from that one movie.
The Cobra secret handshake. Yeah, like from.
Predator Yeah, yeah, it's the. Cobra Yeah, 'cause we're all.
Really bad. Strongman hand clasp.
Let's go after every fight fight, we all just walk around
saying good game brother, good game brother.
I don't really need to protein. Powder to.
Is it broccoli? Chicken.
And rice. Nordic.
Lines of protein powder and hand.
Clasping all that's just what we do here and if that's what you
guys do just. Imagine what the ROTC.
Cobolts get up to so. So is the, so the the.
Zombies came from. Not the.
Direction of the vampire tree, correct?
So we have to be. In between those two things to
go towards the vampire tree, Gareth was that the vampire
tree? If you had to guess a a question
of like the. Direction the the zombies were.
Coming out of. They were coming out of the
Southeast, so that's not what was making.
All the bushes and the blights over there, Gareth, that's not
the source. We have to keep going.
But we really shouldn't be murdered by zombies then,
shouldn't you say like that they.
There. Was like 100 of them and they.
Ate the tree and they looked at me.
They looked at boss, but they let us live.
That's the important. They didn't want us live, I
guess. That is true.
That would probably kill us by that so.
I think we take a stealthy. Approach and just continue.
On and then maybe we'll get bailed out by zombies.
Again, they, they might be on our team.
You never know. I don't know.
If I want to be on that team, it seems to be winning.
So far. Talk.
It's kids down. Can't argue with that to sneak.
In stealth, we've got a tree to murder.
We've. Got a tree?
To murder. Let's go stake it with a.
Vampire we. Just need to find a vampire.
So we. Continue star wipe into star
wipe, star wipe, scream flip push forward into and it
pixelates. Out and then.
Pixelates back in. And we are in the same place and
then in a different tree slided wipe slide.
Wipe to our. Third tree.
A great visual gag that is entirely.
Lost. I can imagine it.
I can hear that we only that it's we're only.
Saying it, I can visualize, I can do the apple in my head.
You knew that it was time to get up into a.
Tree when you encountered the fog.
When you hit the fog a. It became.
Immediately. Darker.
The your. Your visual distance was
immediately reduced and B, it seemed to have some some kind of
some kind of effect. You guys kept hearing things in
the distance, seeing perhaps shadows moving.
Behind trees? Where there?
Wasn't anything there it it was called illusory fog.
Indeed, I guess I'm not afraid at all.
Then sure, I guess. This is exactly this is exactly
what you were what you. Were told was going to happen.
So why would you be afraid? I'm not afraid at all, you know
I was. Way more afraid of the.
Vampire. Triants.
But then you see this tree. Oh yeah.
You guys get up, you hit the. Fog and.
Because your vision is reduced, you do actually have to move
through the fog. A good ways to see this tree.
This tree can create 500 feet of fog.
God damn. Yeah, I think.
That the. Intelligence, Wisdom sort of
save against the illusory fog. I think that's a wisdom save.
I really wish you'd said intelligence.
I'm. Sorry that I didn't.
That's OK. 9 It's only a. Difference of one for.
Me. 12/5 OK 55. Wow, that's a 5 for me, but a?
-1 so that's 14 for bite. What's up?
It's. Technically a zero 'cause I
wrote. 2:00 And it's -2 Oh yeah. Oh yeah, 0.
Saving throws, so it might be. Gone.
Oh, Ebang. Here, somehow even ends up.
Lower than a Nat one 'cause you don't even worry about the
bonuses on a Nat one, it just is a Nat one.
But with a 0. You had to work at it, had to
earn that zero. I do.
What I can? Yeah, I was like, Oh my God.
It's. Too, It's so bad.
And I looked, I was like, oh, minus, that's not good.
OK. So who got above?
A10 me and bite. Bite and ducats.
You see? A the the vampire tree that you
guys saw get mowed down by. Zombies.
Was really tall and lanky with long legs and long reaching arms
and A and a a less densely foliage crown.
This tree is it's probably only 40 feet tall, but it is a it's a
thick tree, perhaps 20 feet around with a dense crown that
overhangs with long woody vines that dangle down from the from
the crown. And it's it's got a big wide
coat like mouth with large wooden protrusions, 2 of them
hanging down sharp like and out from the.
Out from the toad. Mouth comes a marching, a
cluster of of little blights, Gareth.
And butt. And eep, the three of you see an
an immense ancient undead shadow dragon.
Oh jeez, that's bad. That's not good.
Does anybody have Nelson's? Number Can we call him to?
Join us honestly, please. Squatting on on a.
Hill with great wings tattered and and raised above the trees.
Somehow in like a perspective zoom.
You can see through portions of its neck as like an eldritch
light wells up within it, and its mouth hangs open too far to
release a puff of smoke that glows and crackles within in a
way that you are certain means instant death.
I sure AM. And that's where.
We're going to end the episode, so we've.
Seen the bad guy? Now we can just go.
Report back, right? We don't have to.
Yeah, I'm not fighting that. Scary.
Dungeons, drive ins and dice. A wider world is deemed by.
Theodore Stringer The players this season are Josh Baker as
Gareth Mockford, Lawrence Jennings as Butt Soft Gray
Stringer as Eep, Mike Harrison as Bite My Thumb Sir and myself
and Williams as Ducats. We are hard at work preparing
all sorts of bonus content to be released over on our Patreon.
To be first in line to access all the bonus goodies, make sure
you join the Patreon over at patreon.com. back slash D Dad
podcast where you can access all the transcripts of the episodes
and drop a little support if you're feeling so inclined.
That link is also in the description below.
Make sure to leave us a rating and or review wherever.
You're listening. In from and drop a comment below
to let us know what you think of us and these silly little
Cobalts. Next episode comes out on
February. 19th. We'll talk to you then.